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1
00:00:01,320 --> 00:00:02,753
Previously on Danger 5,,,
2
00:00:02,960 --> 00:00:05,269
You took those photos
to get back at Khrushchev?
3
00:00:07,360 --> 00:00:09,078
Aaagh!
4
00:00:09,280 --> 00:00:11,077
Game's up, my friend!
Drop the wiener!
5
00:00:11,280 --> 00:00:12,952
Sonofabitch!
6
00:00:13,160 --> 00:00:15,196
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
7
00:00:16,760 --> 00:00:18,113
Hitler has possessed Holly
8
00:00:18,320 --> 00:00:21,153
and now l think he's messing
with the space-time continuum!
9
00:00:25,360 --> 00:00:26,679
Quickly, friends! Take a drink!
10
00:00:26,880 --> 00:00:28,950
We're going back in time!
11
00:00:30,960 --> 00:00:33,633
(GUNFlRE AND SHOUTlNG )
12
00:00:39,160 --> 00:00:40,752
(BOMB WHlSTLES THROUGH THE AlR)
13
00:00:48,960 --> 00:00:52,748
(GUNFlRE AND SHOUTlNG CONTlNUES)
14
00:00:52,960 --> 00:00:54,439
(BLOWS WHlSTLE)
15
00:01:03,120 --> 00:01:06,829
Goal!
16
00:01:09,040 --> 00:01:11,076
(GASPlNG AND SCREAMlNG )
- Hmm,
17
00:01:15,680 --> 00:01:17,636
- Ma perche,,, ?
- Ma che cosa,,, ?
18
00:01:19,600 --> 00:01:20,749
(LAUGHS)
19
00:01:32,680 --> 00:01:35,638
(LAUGHTER, MUSlC PLAYS)
20
00:01:37,200 --> 00:01:38,633
(MUSlC STOPS)
21
00:01:46,240 --> 00:01:47,514
(FlRES GUN)
22
00:01:47,720 --> 00:01:49,312
Hoo-hoo!
23
00:01:56,520 --> 00:01:58,158
(SHOUTS lN GERMAN)
24
00:01:58,360 --> 00:01:59,395
Ugh!
25
00:01:59,600 --> 00:02:00,999
(SPEAKS GERMAN)
26
00:02:01,200 --> 00:02:03,589
lt worked,
We're back in World War ll,
27
00:02:03,800 --> 00:02:06,234
What the hell did you put
in that time travel cocktail, Pierre?
28
00:02:06,440 --> 00:02:08,829
Mozzarella! You can't go back in time
without cheese!
29
00:02:09,040 --> 00:02:10,473
(SPEAKS GERMAN)
30
00:02:10,680 --> 00:02:12,636
No! Don't shoot!
31
00:02:14,400 --> 00:02:16,118
Shut up! Shut up!
32
00:02:16,320 --> 00:02:17,753
lt's the space-time continuum,
33
00:02:17,960 --> 00:02:20,474
Anything we alter here, in the past,
can change the future,
34
00:02:21,800 --> 00:02:23,279
- So, we can't shoot Nazis?
- No,
35
00:02:23,480 --> 00:02:24,959
- We can't shoot Nazis?!
- Heil Hitler!
36
00:02:25,160 --> 00:02:27,071
(ALL SHOUT lN GERMAN)
37
00:02:27,280 --> 00:02:29,316
- Nein! Nein! Nein!
(SPEAKS GERMAN)
38
00:02:32,800 --> 00:02:34,358
(LAUGHS)
Aaagh!
39
00:02:34,560 --> 00:02:36,391
(GASPS) Aaagh! Aaagh!
40
00:02:37,720 --> 00:02:40,109
My neck! Oh! The continuum!
41
00:02:40,320 --> 00:02:42,117
The continuum, my friend!
The continuum!
42
00:02:42,320 --> 00:02:45,471
Whoa, whoa! Easy, pal, Easy, easy,
Let me see, let me see,
43
00:02:45,680 --> 00:02:47,796
Oh, your neck is fine!
44
00:02:48,000 --> 00:02:49,274
There's nothing there!
45
00:02:49,480 --> 00:02:50,799
You're cool! Be cool!
46
00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:52,991
Calm down, you silly billy,
47
00:02:57,320 --> 00:02:58,719
Just listen to me, my friends,
48
00:02:58,920 --> 00:03:01,832
Hitler possessed Holly,
He has come back here to alter the future,
49
00:03:02,040 --> 00:03:05,077
And we have to stop and make sure
we don't alter the future in the process,
50
00:03:05,280 --> 00:03:06,076
Huh?
51
00:03:06,280 --> 00:03:08,157
(SNlFFS) Ohh!
52
00:03:08,360 --> 00:03:10,157
All right, we were here before!
53
00:03:10,360 --> 00:03:12,271
This is the last Christmas of the war!
54
00:03:12,480 --> 00:03:14,436
The mission was to rescue the Colonel,
55
00:03:14,640 --> 00:03:17,791
We flew the Danger Zeppelin with
the Deluxe Danger Rocket attachment,
56
00:03:19,720 --> 00:03:20,596
(SlGHS)
57
00:03:20,800 --> 00:03:23,155
PlERRE:
While l took care of the guards,
58
00:03:23,360 --> 00:03:26,989
Then we freed the Colonel
and discovered the cocktail waterfall!
59
00:03:27,200 --> 00:03:29,350
Hey! l forgot about the waterfall!
60
00:03:29,560 --> 00:03:30,913
We all got so drunk!
61
00:03:31,120 --> 00:03:32,951
Wait! That means Claire's here!
62
00:03:33,160 --> 00:03:34,639
(GASPS) l'll see her again!
63
00:03:34,840 --> 00:03:37,035
Oh, no, no!
Don't get any ideas, Tucker,
64
00:03:37,240 --> 00:03:39,708
All we have to do is capture Holly --
uh, Hitler Holly --
65
00:03:39,920 --> 00:03:42,150
and return to the future
before any damage is done,
66
00:03:46,160 --> 00:03:47,434
Da,,, Yeah! Yeah!
67
00:03:47,640 --> 00:03:48,914
No! NO!
68
00:03:49,120 --> 00:03:50,519
Don't touch anything,
69
00:03:50,720 --> 00:03:52,950
don't talk to anyone,
don't shoot any more Nazis
70
00:03:53,160 --> 00:03:56,197
and don't do anything foolish
like talk to your past self,
71
00:03:56,400 --> 00:03:58,436
Yes, You're right, Pierre,
72
00:03:59,560 --> 00:04:01,790
lt would be foolish of me
to embrace this opportunity
73
00:04:02,000 --> 00:04:03,718
to see my wife alive again,,,
74
00:04:04,800 --> 00:04:06,233
or to hold her,,,
75
00:04:07,440 --> 00:04:08,714
to kiss her,
76
00:04:08,920 --> 00:04:10,194
Mmm! Ah-ha-ha!
77
00:04:10,400 --> 00:04:11,674
No, no, no! Tucker!
78
00:04:11,880 --> 00:04:13,916
Stop Holly before
she ruins the future!
79
00:04:14,120 --> 00:04:16,315
(GRUNTS)
80
00:04:16,520 --> 00:04:19,637
(GUNFlRE AND SHOUTlNG )
81
00:04:19,840 --> 00:04:22,798
(ACTlON MUSlC)
82
00:04:28,320 --> 00:04:30,231
(GUNFlRE CONTlNUES)
83
00:04:31,960 --> 00:04:34,599
Merry Christmas, my friends,
We come bearing gifts!
84
00:04:41,640 --> 00:04:43,949
That little girl looks
and sounds like Hitler,
85
00:04:44,160 --> 00:04:46,833
And it looks like she's packin'
some sort of heat,
86
00:04:49,880 --> 00:04:52,030
Aaaaaaagh!
87
00:04:53,960 --> 00:04:55,234
Nice shot, my friend, huh?
88
00:04:55,440 --> 00:04:57,158
(GRUNTS)
- All right, team,
89
00:04:57,360 --> 00:04:58,998
Let's go rescue the Colonel,
90
00:05:00,240 --> 00:05:03,357
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSlC)
91
00:05:18,560 --> 00:05:21,199
(GROANS)
92
00:05:27,160 --> 00:05:30,869
Your plan is as repulsive
as this vegetarian cuttlefish, Hitler,
93
00:05:33,440 --> 00:05:35,510
(DOGS GROWL AND BARK)
94
00:05:35,720 --> 00:05:37,199
(LAUGHS)
95
00:05:39,560 --> 00:05:41,710
Oh,,, Ah,,,
96
00:05:43,680 --> 00:05:44,510
Ohh,,,
97
00:05:44,720 --> 00:05:47,792
(SCREAMS)
98
00:06:03,760 --> 00:06:05,034
(DlAL TONE HUMS)
99
00:06:05,240 --> 00:06:06,958
(PHONE RlNGS)
Huh?
100
00:06:14,520 --> 00:06:15,509
Ha!
101
00:06:17,160 --> 00:06:19,116
Toodle-oo! That'll do,
102
00:06:19,320 --> 00:06:21,356
Hmm-hmm-hmm!
Stop it, Tucker!
103
00:06:21,560 --> 00:06:24,597
You're doing irreversible damage
to the fabric of time!
104
00:06:24,800 --> 00:06:27,109
- And my mind!
- l'm sorry, Pierre,
105
00:06:27,320 --> 00:06:30,153
But l'm in love!
Claire, l'm coming for you!
106
00:06:30,360 --> 00:06:32,430
(PlERRE SHOUTS)
107
00:06:32,640 --> 00:06:34,631
Aaagh,,, ( CHOKES)
108
00:06:35,920 --> 00:06:38,229
Merry Christmas, Pierre!
109
00:06:38,440 --> 00:06:39,793
Aaagh!
110
00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:42,230
(LAUGHS)
- Aaaaaaagh!
111
00:06:43,680 --> 00:06:47,719
(LlVELY MUSlC PLAYS)
112
00:06:47,920 --> 00:06:49,353
(MUSlC STOPS)
WOMAN: Oh,,,
113
00:06:49,560 --> 00:06:51,790
No, no, it's me!
114
00:06:52,000 --> 00:06:53,991
- The continuum!
- lt's okay, my friend, Come,
115
00:06:54,200 --> 00:06:56,395
Join the Christmas luau, huh?
116
00:06:56,600 --> 00:06:59,034
(DEEP VOlCE)
117
00:06:59,880 --> 00:07:02,553
(MANlACAL LAUGHTER)
118
00:07:07,320 --> 00:07:10,551
Aaaagh!
119
00:07:24,000 --> 00:07:26,389
(BOTH GROAN AND STRAlN)
120
00:07:29,280 --> 00:07:31,714
- Oh,,, lt looks like trouble,
- Huh?
121
00:07:41,040 --> 00:07:43,076
Only Americans drink the nog,
122
00:08:03,280 --> 00:08:04,918
(GROANS)
123
00:08:08,800 --> 00:08:10,756
Go, go, Danger Net Pack!
124
00:08:10,960 --> 00:08:12,439
No, not the Net Pack!
125
00:08:12,640 --> 00:08:14,119
Freeze, you Kraut bastards!
126
00:08:14,320 --> 00:08:16,595
Sigaretu? Hmm?
127
00:08:16,800 --> 00:08:18,233
Huh?
128
00:08:20,600 --> 00:08:22,272
(SHOUTlNG lN GERMAN)
129
00:08:22,480 --> 00:08:25,870
(LAUGHS) Yes! Yes!
130
00:08:26,080 --> 00:08:27,559
Let go of me, you brute!
131
00:08:27,760 --> 00:08:29,113
Let go of YOU, you brute!
132
00:08:29,320 --> 00:08:30,116
Claire,
133
00:08:30,320 --> 00:08:32,959
Ha! En garde, Kaltenbrunner!
134
00:08:33,160 --> 00:08:34,832
Oh!
135
00:08:35,040 --> 00:08:36,871
- Oh,,,
- Off with your toupee!
136
00:08:37,960 --> 00:08:39,234
(TUCKER LAUGHS)
137
00:08:39,440 --> 00:08:42,034
Ahh! Ohh! No!
138
00:08:42,240 --> 00:08:44,595
lt burns!
139
00:08:44,800 --> 00:08:47,314
- Are you ready for prime time?
- What's that?
140
00:08:47,520 --> 00:08:49,715
lt's when l show you my stiffy,
141
00:08:49,920 --> 00:08:51,433
Oh!
142
00:08:51,640 --> 00:08:53,312
Not so fast, you Nazi pastie!
143
00:08:53,520 --> 00:08:56,273
- l'll save you, Claire,
- Tucker!
144
00:08:56,480 --> 00:08:58,869
There's only room in the world
for one Tucker,
145
00:09:01,560 --> 00:09:02,390
Ohh!
146
00:09:02,600 --> 00:09:03,874
Ha-ha-ha!
147
00:09:04,080 --> 00:09:05,911
Oh, wunderbar! Wunderbar!
148
00:09:06,120 --> 00:09:08,588
Excellent! Excellent shooting,
149
00:09:08,800 --> 00:09:12,395
Lieutenant, would you care
to join us in the dungeon
150
00:09:12,600 --> 00:09:15,876
to, uh, unwrap this tasty little
Christmas present?
151
00:09:16,080 --> 00:09:17,354
(HOLLY MOANS)
152
00:09:17,560 --> 00:09:18,675
- Yes,
- Yes,
153
00:09:18,880 --> 00:09:20,996
Yes, l would, (LAUGHS)
154
00:09:21,200 --> 00:09:22,918
(LAUGHS lNSANELY)
155
00:09:23,120 --> 00:09:24,997
(lMlTATES lNSANE LAUGH)
156
00:09:26,720 --> 00:09:28,790
(GROANS)
157
00:09:30,120 --> 00:09:34,238
This is the best Christmas miracle
a man could wish for,
158
00:09:34,440 --> 00:09:36,271
A visit from my future self,
159
00:09:36,480 --> 00:09:37,993
No, no, l can't be talking to you,
160
00:09:38,200 --> 00:09:40,714
l could be totally ducking up
the continuum,
161
00:09:40,920 --> 00:09:42,797
How did you know
l was from the future?
162
00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:45,309
Hey, hey, hey,
Take it easy, my future friend, huh?
163
00:09:45,520 --> 00:09:46,794
Here,
164
00:09:47,000 --> 00:09:49,036
Have a drink
of some Honolulu Lullaby,
165
00:09:49,240 --> 00:09:50,673
Drink,
166
00:09:52,560 --> 00:09:54,869
Man, that's a tasty drink!
167
00:09:55,080 --> 00:09:57,753
And nothing bad
seems to be happening,
168
00:09:57,960 --> 00:09:59,234
Mm, Yeah,
169
00:09:59,440 --> 00:10:01,112
Maybe a little partying
with my past self
170
00:10:01,320 --> 00:10:02,799
won't hurt the continuum after all,
171
00:10:03,000 --> 00:10:04,274
Hey,,,
172
00:10:04,480 --> 00:10:07,438
BOTH: This calls for a celebration!
173
00:10:07,640 --> 00:10:08,914
Hey, hey, hey!
174
00:10:09,120 --> 00:10:10,439
(BOTH LAUGH)
175
00:10:10,640 --> 00:10:12,358
Hey, What is that?
176
00:10:12,560 --> 00:10:13,834
lt's the future!
177
00:10:14,040 --> 00:10:16,349
(FUTURE PlERRE LAUGHS)
178
00:10:16,560 --> 00:10:17,959
Play,
179
00:10:18,160 --> 00:10:21,914
('80s ELECTRONlC POP MUSlC PLAYS)
180
00:10:24,520 --> 00:10:27,478
(MUFFLED MUSlC CONTlNUES)
181
00:10:31,600 --> 00:10:33,795
Uh,,, Hmm,
182
00:11:07,360 --> 00:11:09,749
Let me get this straight --
you guys came back from the future
183
00:11:09,960 --> 00:11:11,837
to stop an invincible girl,
possessed by Hitler,
184
00:11:12,040 --> 00:11:13,314
from changing the future?
185
00:11:13,520 --> 00:11:15,317
That means we don't kill Hitler, right?
186
00:11:15,520 --> 00:11:17,556
Yeah, but we got more important
things to worry about,
187
00:11:17,760 --> 00:11:19,990
More important?
What's more important than,,,?
188
00:11:20,200 --> 00:11:23,192
You gotta do something about llsa
while YOU still have a chance,
189
00:11:23,400 --> 00:11:26,312
Do something?
Like,,, what do you mean?
190
00:11:26,520 --> 00:11:29,273
You gotta man up and move in,
before she goes 1 00% Commie,
191
00:11:29,480 --> 00:11:31,072
And tell her how you feel,
192
00:11:31,280 --> 00:11:33,111
- Tell her how l feel?
- Yeah,
193
00:11:33,320 --> 00:11:35,675
Feelings? What, do l become
some sort of fruit in the future?
194
00:11:35,880 --> 00:11:37,313
Mm,
195
00:11:43,760 --> 00:11:44,636
Shit! Shit!
196
00:11:47,480 --> 00:11:48,674
Aagh!
197
00:11:52,560 --> 00:11:54,152
(WHlRRlNG )
198
00:11:54,360 --> 00:11:56,078
- Get the hell down, man! Go!
(SCREAMS)
199
00:11:56,280 --> 00:11:57,713
Go, go!
200
00:12:00,400 --> 00:12:01,594
(LAUGHS)
201
00:12:03,720 --> 00:12:05,517
Go, go, go! Get in the hole!
202
00:12:05,720 --> 00:12:07,472
(SlNGS ) o/~ Springiime in Vienna! o/~
203
00:12:07,680 --> 00:12:10,114
Stop working so fast, Kaltenbrunner,
204
00:12:10,320 --> 00:12:13,710
Can't you see l want her to cower
at the terror of my 40 chickens?!
205
00:12:13,920 --> 00:12:16,434
WE agreed on the bricking, Ali Baba,
206
00:12:16,640 --> 00:12:18,551
Anyway, l only count eight chickens,
207
00:12:18,760 --> 00:12:22,719
Alas, many chicken fell on the journey
from Damascus to Aqaba,
208
00:12:22,920 --> 00:12:25,639
But what if we entomb her with these?
209
00:12:25,840 --> 00:12:27,876
Yes! Think of the honey!
210
00:12:28,080 --> 00:12:29,832
Hey! l love honey!
211
00:12:30,040 --> 00:12:32,190
What you think
about that, Lieutenant?
212
00:12:32,400 --> 00:12:34,038
Ugh! (GROANS)
213
00:12:34,240 --> 00:12:36,435
The jokes ON you, Kaltenbrunner,
214
00:12:36,640 --> 00:12:39,518
An imposter!
Quick, chicken! Protect the gold!
215
00:12:39,720 --> 00:12:41,756
- Oh, man!
(GASPS)
216
00:12:44,760 --> 00:12:46,671
lce-cream?
217
00:12:46,880 --> 00:12:48,154
Oh,,,
218
00:12:48,360 --> 00:12:49,839
Because the cow is cold, Yes!
219
00:12:50,040 --> 00:12:52,474
( CHUCKLES) Very clever,
- Tucker?!
220
00:12:53,800 --> 00:12:57,236
Now that we're married,
you can have it all!
221
00:12:57,440 --> 00:12:59,431
Ahh!
222
00:13:00,760 --> 00:13:02,034
(GROANS)
223
00:13:02,240 --> 00:13:03,878
Birds! Bla,,, Aah,,,
224
00:13:04,080 --> 00:13:08,153
Splendid job, Now, come on,
let's go rescue the Colonel,
225
00:13:08,360 --> 00:13:10,828
(AlRCRAFT ENGlNE ROARS)
226
00:13:17,080 --> 00:13:19,913
l don't think the million-dollar
Danger-Gator is expensive enough
227
00:13:20,120 --> 00:13:21,838
to blow up Dog Mountain,
228
00:13:22,040 --> 00:13:23,314
Just shoot, already!
229
00:13:23,520 --> 00:13:25,476
You guys would have won the war
three times over by now
230
00:13:25,680 --> 00:13:28,035
if you shot your guns off
as much as your damn mouths!
231
00:13:28,240 --> 00:13:29,912
Aagh! Aagh!
232
00:13:30,120 --> 00:13:32,236
Aaaagh!
233
00:13:32,440 --> 00:13:33,839
(GROANS)
234
00:13:34,880 --> 00:13:36,199
(FlRES GUN) Aaagh!
235
00:13:36,400 --> 00:13:39,039
(GROANS AND SlGHS)
That oughta seal it up,
236
00:13:42,320 --> 00:13:45,437
l could do that, l could DO that,
l can do,,,
237
00:13:45,640 --> 00:13:47,039
(GROANS)
- Whoa,
238
00:13:47,240 --> 00:13:49,196
(LAUGHS MANlACALLY)
239
00:13:49,400 --> 00:13:51,789
Ha! (FlRES MlSSlLE)
240
00:13:53,760 --> 00:13:55,637
- Aah,,,
- Avalanche!
241
00:13:55,840 --> 00:13:59,389
Noooo!
242
00:14:02,640 --> 00:14:03,709
lLSA: Whoo!
243
00:14:03,920 --> 00:14:07,356
(UP-BEAT RENDlTlON
OF 'DECK THE HALLS' PLAYS)
244
00:14:09,280 --> 00:14:12,397
Man, you just can't get waterfall-fresh
cocktails like this in the future,
245
00:14:12,600 --> 00:14:15,751
lt just needs, uh, you know,
a little bit of relish,
246
00:14:18,960 --> 00:14:19,995
Whoa!
247
00:14:20,200 --> 00:14:21,713
Mmm!
248
00:14:21,920 --> 00:14:23,194
Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
249
00:14:23,400 --> 00:14:25,038
What's the big idea?!
250
00:14:25,240 --> 00:14:26,753
(LAUGHS)
- Don't be mouthin' me!
251
00:14:26,960 --> 00:14:28,518
You should be mouthin' him!
252
00:14:28,720 --> 00:14:30,392
llsa, what,,,?
253
00:14:35,400 --> 00:14:37,118
Old?
254
00:14:37,320 --> 00:14:38,753
Damaged?
255
00:14:40,760 --> 00:14:42,512
(LAUGHS)
(GROANS)
256
00:14:44,160 --> 00:14:48,278
Why would Hitler be keeping the Colonel
in this,,, romantic bedroom?
257
00:14:48,480 --> 00:14:51,836
You must be,,, worn out
from all that torture, Claire,
258
00:14:52,040 --> 00:14:53,758
(BLOWS) Mm!
259
00:14:53,960 --> 00:14:57,555
Why don't you, uh, make yourself
comfortable on this, uh, bed?
260
00:14:57,760 --> 00:14:59,034
(GRUNTS)
261
00:15:00,160 --> 00:15:02,310
Oh, lovey-dovey, Ohh!
262
00:15:02,520 --> 00:15:04,192
What is wrong with you?!
263
00:15:04,400 --> 00:15:07,358
l just,,, know how much you like roses,
264
00:15:07,560 --> 00:15:10,028
No, l don't,
l,,, can't stand the smell,
265
00:15:11,160 --> 00:15:12,878
(SNlFFS)
266
00:15:13,080 --> 00:15:15,753
Oh,,, Yes, you're right!
267
00:15:15,960 --> 00:15:18,235
Ooh, stop beating around the bush,
Tucker, Tucker!
268
00:15:18,440 --> 00:15:19,839
Just say it!
269
00:15:20,040 --> 00:15:21,917
Claire, l want to show you something,
270
00:15:22,120 --> 00:15:23,599
Have you found sensitive dossiers?
271
00:15:23,800 --> 00:15:25,791
No,
272
00:15:27,120 --> 00:15:28,951
Are you ready for,,, prime time?
273
00:15:29,160 --> 00:15:30,832
Hmm, What's prime time?
274
00:15:31,040 --> 00:15:32,314
lt's, uh,,,
275
00:15:32,520 --> 00:15:33,839
(MUMBLES)
,,when l show you my stiffy,
276
00:15:34,040 --> 00:15:35,473
- Speak up, Tucker!
- Stiffy!
277
00:15:35,680 --> 00:15:36,954
- Oh!
- Aah!
278
00:15:37,160 --> 00:15:39,276
Can't you see
l'm trying to foreplay you, Claire?
279
00:15:39,480 --> 00:15:40,913
Tucker, you're acting like a man!
280
00:15:41,120 --> 00:15:43,680
lt's Christmas, Claire,
and l'm going to intercourse you --
281
00:15:43,880 --> 00:15:45,359
no two ways about it,
282
00:15:45,560 --> 00:15:47,630
- Two-way intercourse?
- Mmm!
283
00:15:48,920 --> 00:15:51,150
- Ohh!
- Mmm!
284
00:15:52,880 --> 00:15:55,314
Claire? How could you?
285
00:15:55,520 --> 00:15:57,397
(GASPS) Two Tuckers?
286
00:15:57,600 --> 00:15:58,828
My God,
287
00:15:59,040 --> 00:16:00,519
You're me,
288
00:16:00,720 --> 00:16:02,756
Yes, From the future,
289
00:16:02,960 --> 00:16:05,076
And l'm a Nazi?
290
00:16:05,280 --> 00:16:06,838
- Goodbye, Claire,
- No!
291
00:16:07,040 --> 00:16:09,873
Yes, do it! There's only room
in the world for one Tucker,
292
00:16:10,080 --> 00:16:12,389
- You're right,
- Ohhh!
293
00:16:13,920 --> 00:16:15,797
(BOTH GROWL WEAKLY)
294
00:16:16,160 --> 00:16:18,196
(LAUGHS)
- l can't wait for the future,
295
00:16:18,400 --> 00:16:19,879
l love this synth!
296
00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:22,036
(SlNGS ) o/~ Bee-boo-ba-ba-boo! o/~
297
00:16:22,240 --> 00:16:23,514
(LAUGHS) This telephone!
298
00:16:23,720 --> 00:16:25,199
These computer disks!
299
00:16:25,400 --> 00:16:27,277
These,,,! Hey, what are these?!
300
00:16:27,480 --> 00:16:28,754
Uh, cheer-up movies!
301
00:16:28,960 --> 00:16:31,872
(GASPS) l LOVE cheer-up movies!
(BOTH LAUGH)
302
00:16:32,080 --> 00:16:33,149
BOTH: Aaaagh!
303
00:16:33,360 --> 00:16:34,509
(GASPS)
304
00:16:34,720 --> 00:16:36,073
Aagh! Aaagh!
305
00:16:37,280 --> 00:16:39,794
Stop it, Tuckers!
306
00:16:41,720 --> 00:16:43,870
Run, Pierre! The future people
have come to get us!
307
00:16:44,080 --> 00:16:46,594
- Sure!
- Uh, no, they are our friends,
308
00:16:46,800 --> 00:16:48,233
Two Tuckers? Two Pierres?
309
00:16:48,440 --> 00:16:50,908
Where's llsa and Jackson and,,, me?
310
00:16:51,120 --> 00:16:52,394
You're right here,
311
00:16:52,600 --> 00:16:54,556
Oh! Oh!
312
00:16:54,760 --> 00:16:56,193
Oh!
313
00:16:57,360 --> 00:16:58,873
lf you don't come away
with me, Claire,
314
00:16:59,080 --> 00:17:00,354
then this will be your fate!
315
00:17:00,560 --> 00:17:01,675
- Ohh!
- Now,,,
316
00:17:01,880 --> 00:17:04,189
Stop being a flannel
and let's live happily ever after,
317
00:17:04,400 --> 00:17:07,233
Tucker, you've had your Claire,
You can't have another one!
318
00:17:07,440 --> 00:17:09,351
"Why try future marmalade
on your crumpet
319
00:17:09,560 --> 00:17:13,075
"when,,, present marmalade
does the job just fine?" l say,
320
00:17:13,280 --> 00:17:14,554
Oh, leave me alone!
321
00:17:14,760 --> 00:17:17,035
Tucker, we've been consumed
by the temptations of time travel
322
00:17:17,240 --> 00:17:18,832
and forgotten
the real reason we're here,
323
00:17:19,040 --> 00:17:21,713
- l thought you were here to party,
- Yes! Uh,,, no,
324
00:17:21,920 --> 00:17:23,194
Wait, No,
325
00:17:23,400 --> 00:17:25,470
Hitler has come back from the future
to change the world,
326
00:17:25,680 --> 00:17:28,592
And if we do not stop him,
then we may never exist!
327
00:17:28,800 --> 00:17:30,074
(BOTH GASP)
328
00:17:30,280 --> 00:17:31,599
We should fight them together!
329
00:17:31,800 --> 00:17:33,870
- Yes!
- l won't work with
these murderous future scoundrels!
330
00:17:34,080 --> 00:17:35,035
Hear, hear,
331
00:17:35,240 --> 00:17:36,912
Come on, my friends, huh?
332
00:17:37,120 --> 00:17:38,473
lt's Christmas,
333
00:17:38,680 --> 00:17:39,635
- Yes!
- Yeah,
334
00:17:39,840 --> 00:17:41,159
Oh,,,
335
00:17:41,360 --> 00:17:42,634
Oh,,, all right, then,
336
00:17:42,840 --> 00:17:45,593
- Oh-ho-ho! Yes!
- Yeah!
337
00:17:48,000 --> 00:17:49,319
(SNlFFS) Oh!
338
00:17:49,520 --> 00:17:51,238
Wow!
339
00:17:51,440 --> 00:17:53,431
BOTH PlERRES:
Merry Christmas, everyone!
340
00:17:53,640 --> 00:17:55,596
(ALL LAUGH)
341
00:17:55,800 --> 00:17:57,995
JACKSON: Cheers, Cheers,
- Oh, hey, hey, stop!
342
00:17:58,200 --> 00:18:00,998
We've done it again!
We're supposed to be killing Hitler!
343
00:18:01,200 --> 00:18:02,474
Come on, Pierre,
344
00:18:02,680 --> 00:18:05,069
One more waterfall-fresh
Shirley Temple,
345
00:18:05,280 --> 00:18:07,191
- No!
- Yes!
346
00:18:07,400 --> 00:18:10,233
Sorry, my friend,
l thought he was talking to me!
347
00:18:10,440 --> 00:18:11,873
l thought he was talking to me!
348
00:18:12,080 --> 00:18:14,469
(ALL LAUGH)
'Cause we are the same,,,
349
00:18:15,520 --> 00:18:17,158
Let's go win some war,
350
00:18:17,360 --> 00:18:18,509
ALL: Yeah!
351
00:18:20,960 --> 00:18:23,349
(PLAYS 'SONG OF JO Y' ON GUlTAR)
352
00:18:25,480 --> 00:18:26,913
(BOMB WHlSTLES THROUGH THE AlR)
353
00:18:29,080 --> 00:18:32,072
(EXPLOSlONS)
354
00:18:33,360 --> 00:18:35,999
( CONTlNUES PLAYlNG GUlTAR)
355
00:18:55,040 --> 00:18:56,792
(GROANS)
356
00:18:58,280 --> 00:18:59,998
- Hey? Hey, you?
- Huh? Huh? Huh?
357
00:19:00,200 --> 00:19:02,031
l'm on your side, l'm a spy,
358
00:19:02,240 --> 00:19:03,798
- Spy?
- Look,
359
00:19:04,000 --> 00:19:04,910
(GAGS)
360
00:19:05,120 --> 00:19:07,156
Huh? Uh,,,
361
00:19:07,360 --> 00:19:08,839
(RAPlD GUNFlRE)
362
00:19:18,440 --> 00:19:20,351
Oh!
363
00:19:40,080 --> 00:19:42,992
(WHlRRlNG )
364
00:19:50,560 --> 00:19:51,993
Aaagh!
365
00:19:54,000 --> 00:19:54,910
Ahh!
366
00:19:55,120 --> 00:19:56,553
Shut up, Leanne!
367
00:19:56,760 --> 00:19:58,751
l don't wanna go to school!
368
00:19:58,960 --> 00:20:02,157
(LAUGHS MANlACALLY)
369
00:20:03,960 --> 00:20:05,234
Hey,
370
00:20:05,440 --> 00:20:07,032
Where am l?
371
00:20:07,240 --> 00:20:08,514
There's that shiny piece of shrimp!
372
00:20:08,720 --> 00:20:10,915
(ALL SHOUT AT ONCE)
373
00:20:12,520 --> 00:20:14,795
This one! Yeah, yeah, yeah,
374
00:20:16,520 --> 00:20:18,670
(ACTlON MUSlC)
375
00:20:23,680 --> 00:20:27,912
(BOMB WHlSTLES THROUGH THE AlR)
(EXPLOSlONS)
376
00:20:34,920 --> 00:20:36,717
No, Hitler, l have the power,
377
00:20:36,920 --> 00:20:37,989
(LAUGHS)
378
00:20:38,200 --> 00:20:41,636
Sit,,, down,,, you!
379
00:20:41,840 --> 00:20:43,432
Huh? Oh,,,
380
00:20:47,320 --> 00:20:48,594
Damn it,
381
00:20:48,800 --> 00:20:50,836
Now original Hitler is invincible,
382
00:20:51,040 --> 00:20:52,359
He's won! Shit!
383
00:20:52,560 --> 00:20:53,834
We need a Christmas miracle,
384
00:20:54,040 --> 00:20:56,634
And we need it fast,
This place is falling apart,
385
00:20:56,840 --> 00:20:58,239
Claire, do you still have,,,?
386
00:20:58,440 --> 00:21:00,078
Claire?
387
00:21:01,400 --> 00:21:02,833
We're here to rescue you, Colonel,
388
00:21:03,040 --> 00:21:04,234
(LAUGHS)
389
00:21:04,440 --> 00:21:05,759
No, naive Pierre,
390
00:21:05,960 --> 00:21:07,518
Get down, Claire, Get down,
391
00:21:07,720 --> 00:21:09,153
COLONEL: Get down!
392
00:21:11,760 --> 00:21:14,354
No!
393
00:21:15,960 --> 00:21:17,439
No!
394
00:21:18,840 --> 00:21:22,116
ALL: Aaagh!
395
00:21:25,200 --> 00:21:27,316
(LAUGHS)
396
00:21:27,520 --> 00:21:29,397
No! Aaagh! Aah!
397
00:21:32,720 --> 00:21:34,790
We're still here, right?
Are you all right, my friends?
398
00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:36,752
Do you feel like you don't exist?
399
00:21:36,960 --> 00:21:40,077
- No,
- Uh, me neither, l, uh, feel pretty good,
400
00:21:40,280 --> 00:21:42,589
Then the continuum was bull-fish!
401
00:21:45,360 --> 00:21:47,191
Not so fast, Johnny!
402
00:21:47,400 --> 00:21:49,038
l'm putting you in detention!
403
00:21:49,240 --> 00:21:50,832
Aaaagh!
404
00:21:51,040 --> 00:21:52,439
Nice one, my friend!
405
00:21:53,960 --> 00:21:55,598
JACKSON: Whoa! Whoa-whoa!
406
00:21:56,480 --> 00:21:57,833
(WHlNES)
407
00:22:00,320 --> 00:22:02,276
More like gun power, (FlRES GUN)
408
00:22:02,480 --> 00:22:04,596
Aaagh! Aaagh! Aaagh!
409
00:22:04,800 --> 00:22:06,597
l'm so sorry, Claire,
410
00:22:08,160 --> 00:22:09,434
l suppose this means,,,
411
00:22:09,640 --> 00:22:11,551
l'm just not meant to have you,
412
00:22:13,280 --> 00:22:16,511
Here, take this, in case
you get peckish in the afterlife,
413
00:22:19,680 --> 00:22:21,432
(BOMB WHlSTLES THROUGH THE AlR)
414
00:22:26,640 --> 00:22:27,914
l'm sorry, Colonel,
415
00:22:28,120 --> 00:22:30,395
We came from the future
to stop this from happening,
416
00:22:30,600 --> 00:22:32,397
Nice work, you migrant,
417
00:22:36,920 --> 00:22:38,399
Yes, llsa,
418
00:22:38,600 --> 00:22:42,036
l think it's safe to assume
Hitler is proper dead,
419
00:22:43,080 --> 00:22:44,638
Adolf Dead-ler,
420
00:22:44,840 --> 00:22:46,432
COLONEL: Yes,
l like the sound of that,
421
00:22:46,640 --> 00:22:48,949
Ohhh! Just get me
the hell out of here!
422
00:22:49,160 --> 00:22:51,116
Lucky l brought extra mozzarella,
423
00:22:51,320 --> 00:22:52,275
(LAUGHS)
424
00:22:52,480 --> 00:22:54,948
Here, take one,
Yes, here, one for you!
425
00:22:55,160 --> 00:22:56,752
Here, Tucker, Jackson,
426
00:22:56,960 --> 00:22:58,393
Wait!
427
00:22:58,600 --> 00:23:01,034
Can we spare an extra drink,,,
428
00:23:01,240 --> 00:23:02,878
for the Colonel?
429
00:23:03,080 --> 00:23:04,832
Don't be a prawn cracker, Tucker!
430
00:23:05,040 --> 00:23:08,237
Now you're gone, l'm gonna get
all the credit for winning the war!
431
00:23:08,440 --> 00:23:10,431
Now, nick off,
before you ruin it somehow!
432
00:23:10,640 --> 00:23:12,312
To the future!
433
00:23:12,520 --> 00:23:14,636
JACKSON: Yeah!
- Ugh!
434
00:23:14,840 --> 00:23:16,592
Ohh,,,
435
00:23:20,880 --> 00:23:23,758
Ohhh!
436
00:23:25,560 --> 00:23:27,118
Hey, hey!
437
00:23:27,320 --> 00:23:29,436
Smells like our original time line,
438
00:23:29,640 --> 00:23:31,153
We're home!
439
00:23:31,360 --> 00:23:32,634
JACKSON: Yeah!
440
00:23:32,840 --> 00:23:34,910
Yeah! Fast-food joint! Bonus!
441
00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:39,353
Let's go pat that horse!
442
00:23:39,560 --> 00:23:43,348
l'll take five guacamole wieners
and an extra medium cheese-shake,
443
00:23:45,280 --> 00:23:46,872
A German horse, Ooh,
444
00:23:48,840 --> 00:23:49,795
Huh?
445
00:23:53,280 --> 00:23:54,554
Hitler Hat?!
446
00:23:54,760 --> 00:23:57,149
ALL: Hitler Hat?!
447
00:23:57,360 --> 00:23:58,429
Mm,
448
00:24:03,880 --> 00:24:06,235
JACKSON: Uh-oh,
449
00:24:06,440 --> 00:24:07,714
New from Tamico,
450
00:24:07,920 --> 00:24:09,273
Das Fuhrer, the board game!
451
00:24:09,480 --> 00:24:10,879
Listen to HitIer's orders and survive,
452
00:24:11,080 --> 00:24:12,593
HITLER: AII pIayers eat one mushroom,
453
00:24:12,800 --> 00:24:14,313
BOTH: Yes, mein Fuhrer!
454
00:24:15,400 --> 00:24:16,469
Ugh!
455
00:24:16,680 --> 00:24:17,669
Progress around the board
456
00:24:17,880 --> 00:24:18,790
using HitIer's dice dome!
457
00:24:19,000 --> 00:24:21,309
Oh, no! I Ianded on war crimes!
458
00:24:21,520 --> 00:24:22,589
Take your cyanide
459
00:24:22,800 --> 00:24:24,074
before the AIIies find you,
460
00:24:24,280 --> 00:24:26,032
Yes! HonourabIe death bonus!
461
00:24:26,240 --> 00:24:28,310
Be the first to escape to Argentina
462
00:24:28,520 --> 00:24:30,397
and Iive off untoId stoIen riches!
463
00:24:30,600 --> 00:24:31,828
Ha-ha, ha-ha, ha-ha!
464
00:24:32,040 --> 00:24:32,916
Victory,
465
00:24:33,120 --> 00:24:34,599
Das Fuhrer board game, avaiIabIe now
466
00:24:34,800 --> 00:24:37,360
at aII good pro-Nazi retaiIers, from Tamico,
467
00:24:39,640 --> 00:24:41,756
Subtitles SBS Australia 201 4
468
00:24:52,440 --> 00:24:54,032
Make that time-travel cocktail, Pierre,
469
00:24:54,240 --> 00:24:56,708
and get us out of this godforsaken
Nazi universe,
470
00:24:56,920 --> 00:24:58,399
lt's freakin' mozzarella!
471
00:25:02,520 --> 00:25:04,272
Run, my friends! l'll save you!
29305
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