All language subtitles for Curb Your Enthusiasm S06E09 The Therapists 1080p AMZN WEB-DL DD+2 0 H 264-AJP69 (1)_track3_[eng]

( theme music playing )

Larry:
It's a mystery to me--

How could you
Have lived

- with that maniac
For that long?
- ( laughs )

- I don't know.
- huh?

- I don't know.
- how did you do it?

'cause, you know,
I'm not that guy
Anymore.

- no?
- no.

Honestly, you don't look
Like that guy anymore.

Look, look how much
I've changed.

- did I ever
Dress like this?
- no.

- your shirt's tucked in.
- I'm tucking in.

- you've got real shoes on.
- shoes, slacks.

You look like
A real person,

- not an eighth-grader
With silly shoes.
- yeah.

I used to walk
Around in sneakers
Like an eighth-grader.

I have to say,
I love the new larry.

- really?
- yeah.

- you know
What I wanna do?
- hmm?

I want to travel
With you--

A little traveling
In europe maybe,

You know, bicycles--
All that stuff you
Wanted to do...

- yeah.
- ...That you used to
Ask me about,

And "No no,
I don't wanna do that;

There's no golf courses
Nearby..."

I don't give a shit
About golf anymore.

I just want
To be with you.

And you know what else?
And I know you love
Scuba diving.

I never did that with you.
You always wanted to go
Scuba diving.

- I know.
- you know, I can't
See underwater

'cause, you know...
But whatever,

I'll feel around
For the fish, you know.

Well, it seems like
You've done a lot
Of reflecting.

I'm a completely
Changed man.

The only vestige
Of my old self

Is that I've still got
The good breath,
You know.

That's the thing
You're keeping?

The new larry's keeping
The minty breath, yeah.

The old larry
You're getting rid of?

He's over.
He's over.

You know, he hated
Your sister...

He did?

You know what?
Forget that larry.

He's dead.
He's dead.

He's completely dead.

Anyway,

It's really good
To see you.

It is good
To see you too.

It's very impressive
That you're--

- really?
- --that you're trying.
It is.

- I really am trying.
- I know.
I can see that.

- I really am.
- I know.

Hey, let's go to the movies
Tomorrow night--

Movies, dinner.

Come on,
I'll take you out
To dinner.

Um, I would love to go
To the movies and dinner.

Really?

Let me just talk
To my therapist

And see what she
Has to say first.

I just want to make sure
She feels good

- about that.
- mm-hmm.

I'll call my therapist
And see what she says
And I'll call you.

Great.

Hey, how much
Are we supposed to tip
The bartender, by the way?

Don't they make
Too much money? I mean,
Everybody buys a drink.

They get, what,
20% of every drink?

That's insane, isn't it?

Well, they work
Really hard.

Yeah, I know, I know.
It's good.

They're on their feet
All night,

So whatever.
Whatever they make--
Good for them.

They work hard,
You know.

Larry:
It could not
Have gone better.

It was amazing.

I showed up in--
You know,

I was tucked in,
I had shoes on.

She never likes
The way I dress,

But she noticed
The tucked-in

And she was very
Impressed with that.

I looked like a man,
You know.

This is great stuff.
It's great progress.

- yeah.
- I have to say,
It's not surprising,

Because I'd like to think
I know what I'm doing.

And, oh, I said--
I was talking about
The future--

If we get back together,
What I want to do:

I want to travel
With her,

You know, on bicycles.

Scuba diving--
In a zillion years
Wouldn't I go,

But, you know what?
I would do it with her.
I really would.

Be enthusiastic,
But don't make

Any specific promises
That you can't fulfill.

That's my own
Personal advice.

Geez, I said a lot
Of stuff last night.

Let's deal with that
When it arises.

Oh, I might be
Bicycling in france
In a couple of months.

Again, let's focus
On the next stage.

Well, here's the thing:
I asked her

To go to the movies
Tonight, okay?

And the therapist
Gave her the green light,

So we're going
To dinner and a movie,

Or a movie and a dinner,
Depending on the
Starting time.

Sometimes it works out
You go to a dinner
And a movie,

Sometimes it's better
To have dinner
After the movie,

- so you have
Something to talk about.
- movie, dinner.

Let's not even waste time
Talking about that.

- movie, dinner.
- movie, dinner.

So you take herto a movie--

After you do the movie,
Just reach over,

Grab her hand,
Hold it tenderly

And tell her,
"I love you."

Really?

- whisper into her ear,
"I love you."
- okay.

At that point
She's feeling vulnerable.

And then at dinner--
That's when you have to
Up the stakes.

That's when you have
To tell her you want her
To move back in with you

And she has until monday
To decide,

Or that's it.

It works.That's all I can say.

Wow.
Wow.

She might not like it
At first,

But there's one thing
She won't be able to say,

Is that the guy
Who just said that
Is a pussy.

No one likes a pussy.

What, you're getting
A lot of pussy from me?

Not an amount
That is not manageable.

That's why
We have to say,

"Monday is
The cutoff point:

Either we're back on,
Move back in,

Or monday-- whew."

Okay okay.
I think I got it.

Although I gotta say,

Being a pussy
Really wasn't
My problem with her.

It was more the fact
That I was selfish

- and kind of thoughtless...
- we have to stop.

Oh, okay.

Huh.
I thought I had...

We have to stop.

Go, whew--
Go get 'em.

Larry: okay.

- ( romantic music playing )
- man onscreen: je t'aime.

( continues
Speaking french )

Woman:
Je t'aime aussi...

( continues
Speaking french )

( whispers )
I love you.

Cheryl: I gotta tell ya,
The new larry is really
Working for me.

Let me tell you
Something, okay?

The new larry can really
Make you happy.

I really can.
I know I can.

Just the idea of you
Wanting me to be happy

Is amazing.

Not just happy,
But really, like,
Delirious.

- delirious?
- delirious.

- cheryl: hi.
- what a surprise!

Is this
What I think it is?

Well, we're just...

- having dinner.
- ...Having dinner, talking.

This is
One great picture.

I love it.

It's good
To see you guys.

Hey, can I ask you
For a quick favor?

Nan's dad dan
Has alzheimer's...

Really?
Oh.

We're having
A five-mile walkathon
At venice beach.

I need you to sponsor me.
Jeff's doing it.

$50 a mile--
250 bucks.

So you want me
To sponsor you?

Yeah, sure.
250 bucks.

"Larry david,"
Right there.

It's worth it,
Believe me.

You don't know
What alzheimer's is.

- he's got it bad.
- really?

What does he do?

He runs around the house
All day naked,

Chasing himself,
Playing tag.

- it's awful.
- really tly?

He screams at the cat
'cause she didn't vote.

Wow.

Every time he farts,
He calls the fire
Department.

Just sign it, please.
Don't make me beg you.

You know...

It is a great cause.

Yeah.
Yeah, sure.

- that's great.
- of course.
It's a damn good cause.

- nan: oh, thank you,
Honey. Whoa.
- thank you very much.

- cheryl: yeah.
- there you go--
250 bucks.

- nan: thank you, larry.
- great to see
You too again.

Cheryl: it's good
To see you guys.

Thanks.

It's so nice of you
To sponsor him.

Come on, what is it?
$250?

I know, but I feel like
Usually you would complain

Or, I don't know,
Give him a hard time, but...

- old larry.
- I know.

I feel like you are
A different person.

Honey, I am
A different person.

I'm so different.

Listen...

I want you
To move back in with me.

You have till monday

To decide.

Monday?

Yeah, monday.

Then the offer's
Off the table.

( harrumphs )

You're giving me
An ultimatum?

What...?

- oh my god.
You know what?
- oh, okay.

- you don't have to
Wait till monday.
- okay, so...

- guess what?
The answer is no.
- okay, there's no ultimatum.

- you're never
Going to change, larry.
- take your time.

- you obviously have no idea.
- take a month, I don't care.

- don't call me,
Please, ever.
- what?

No!

Hey, cheryl.

Cheryl.

Cheryl, the therapist
Told me to say that.

- oh, really?
- I want you to move in.
I do love you.

You know what, larry?
I thought the new larry
Didn't lie.

- I'm not lying.
- oh, really?

The therapist said that.
He gave me the deadline.

I'm so stupid.
I was actually
Believing you.

No, believe me.
That was all true,

Except for
The deadline part.

The therapist told me
To say that.

Cheryl!

But the deadline--

Agh! Agh!

Agh-hh!

Oh.

You ruined my life.

You ruined
My life, okay?

- okay.
- give her an ultimatum?

- whoa, okay.
- what the fuck was that?

- I was
This close, this close!
- larry, you're angry.

She's gone.

It's a setback.
It's a setback.

I told you she wasn't
Bothered by the high
Pussy percentage,

- but you didn't
Listen to me.
- we ran out of time.

I had to see someone else
Who was suicidal.

You know what
We're going to do now?
We're going to go to her house

And you're going to tell her
That the whole thing
Was your idea.

Okay, let's have
A session.

No, I don't want
To have a session.

You're going to tell her
That you told me to give her
That stupid ultimatum.

( doorbell rings )

Larry?

Sorry for popping in
On you like this.

- hello, I'm dr. Bright.
- this is my therapist.

- hi, I'm cheryl.
- could we come in

- and talk to you
For just a few minutes?
- larry...

It won't take long.

I guess so.

Come on in.

Thanks.

Wow.

You're on the ocean?

Yeah.

Wow, this is...

These places are expensive,
On the water, aren't they?

My therapist said

That I should do
Something nice for myself,

Sort of a love-me gift.

And I decided,
You know what?

I've always wanted
To live on the beach.

I can do it now,
So...

- very good advice.
- yeah.

Oh, you think so?

Mm.

I don't remember
You telling me to get
Any love-me gifts.

- we were moving onto that
At some point.
- oh, really?

- we would have
Arrived at that.
- oh, interesting.

So what do you guys
Need to tell me?

- go ahead, bright.
- okay.

I gave larry
Some flawed advice.

I told larry
To give you
An ultimatum.

He told me
To say that.

You told him
To say that?

Yeah, because the picture
That was painted of you

Was not the person
I'm seeing--

- what?
- well, no no no.
I mean that you--

What does that mean?

I think--
I don't know.

I just had--
It means nothing.

- what did you think?
- I thought maybe

You were the kind of person
Who would like an ultimatum.

- and you're not, clearly.
- what kind of picture are
You painting of me?

Just a loving
Portrayal.

It was--
It was a deeply
Loving portrayal.

But-- but--

What have I been saying
About her?

You didn't describe her
Physically--

So I didn't know
What she looked like.

That's why
I'm just saying, whoo!
I'm just impressed.

Why would it matter what
Somebody looks like
Physically--

- what kind of advice--?
- because you get the face
You deserve, right?

The face tells a story.

All right, all right.
The point is,

You get an idea
Of the person who I've been
Listening to here?

- is it coming through
To you?
- yeah.

So you told larry
To give me an ultimatum.

Fine, okay.
Now I know that.

- okay?
- he is to blame.

I'm 90% to blame
For everything.

90%?
I think 100%.
100% to blame.

Well, I'm taking
A lion's share.

No, take more
Than a lion's share.
Take the whole share.

Take it all.

Okay, all right.
No, that's fair.

Yeah, I'm 100% to blame.

I told larry
To do the--

To hold your hand,
To say, "I love you."

- the new larry--
It's all me.
- all right, no no no.

The new larry is you?

What?
What did you say?

You're not responsible
For the new larry.

I'm the new--
You didn't make
The new larry.

You told me
To take 100%.

I invented the new larry,
Not you.

What about tucking in
The t-shirt?

You didn't tell me--
You told me to tuck in?

All right, I understand
What you're saying.

I'm going to talk
To dr. Salvin

And figure it out,
So thanks.

All right.
Okay.

All right,
Thanks for coming,
I guess.

Why are you taking
Credit for new larry?

I laid the foundation
For new larry.

Bullshit--
You laid foundation.

You're a moron.
How could you suggest
Such a thing?

It's not
An exact science.

- and I mean...
- jeff: clearly.

I mean, that is
Unbelievable,
Seriously.

The thing about it
Is that...

She doesn't make a move now
In her life

Unless her therapist
Tells her.

But the therapist
Doesn't know anything
About me.

- I'm not represented there.
- no, you're not.

- if the therapist
Knew me, okay?
- bright: mm.

If the therapist thought
I was a terrific guy,

- there would be
A counterargument to it.
- right.

How do you get to her?

I got it.
Let's go.

Come on.

- come on, bright.
- yeah, thank you.

So you jump out,

You grabthe therapist's purse.

Then I come
Out of nowhere,

I tackle you,
Take you down,

Get the pursefrom you.

You run off,
You get yourself

A cup of coffee,
A piece of pizza.

And I return
The handbag

And I'm like a god,
You know.

Pshh, I'll do that shit.

- yeah. Yeah.
- I'll do it.
What the fuck?

You're my motherfucking man,
Larry.

Is he the greatest?
Are you the greatest, man?

- what's up?
That's how we do it, yo.
- you are the greatest.

That's how we
Fucking do it.

I walk by,
I grab the fucking purse.

I run down the street,
Larry pops the fuck out,

Tackles me,
Tries to get
The purse back.

I fuck larry up,
I keep on rolling.

You--

Somebody gotta get
Fucked up, larry, right?

You don't need to--
What are you saying,
Fuck me up?

When you tackle me
I ain't going to look like
A fucking bitch and shit,

- let you fuck me up.
- no. I tackle you

And then you run away.
You run away.

The more fucked up you are,
The more of a hero
You're gonna look like.

I'm going to break
Your fucking teeth,
Your glasses or something.

Leon, I don't need to look
Like that much of a hero.

Just stopping you
And giving her her purse
Back's enough.

There's no way in hell.
You can't do that shit
Half-speed.

It's not realistic, larry,
If I don't fuck you up.

- hey, who's this?
- hello, I'm dr. Bright.

That's my therapist
I was telling you about.

- oh, is this
Mr. Ultimatum?
- yeah.

Yo, man, that idea
You came up with
Was awful.

So what's
Going on, l.D.?

Nothing.
Nothing really.

What's happening?
What's happening, leon?

- larry wants me
To mug somebody.
- who? Who?

- yeah, but it's
A pretend mugging.
- it's pretend.

It's all for fun.

I know you're not
Going along with that.

Ain't nobody gonna
Get hurt. I'ma grab
The fucking purse...

- leon!
- ...Larry's going to jump out
And try to stop me,

- I'ma fuck larry up...
- you're not gonna
Fuck me up.

- you done lost
Your mind, leon.
- you done lost your mind.

( all yelling )

I'll tell you what:
He's not doing it!

You know what?

This pasty-ass motherfucker
Got you into it.

Have him get your ass
Out of it.

She's right.

I'll do it.

Eh, fuck it.

There's her therapist.

Okay okay, that's her.
You see her?

( giggles )
Yeah, okay.
All right, let's go.

What are you doing?
What is this?

You look like a rapist
With that thing on.
You don't need that.

You know what?
Put the hood up.

Isn't that a cliche?

- it's not a cliche.
Put the hood up.
- all right.

All right, good.
What?

I've changed my mind.
I can't do it.
I can't do it.

( arguing )

Go do it.

- give me your bag.
I'm mugging you.
- no. No.

I got it!
I got it!

- ( larry yelling )
- oh my god.

- ( both grunting )
- oh my god.

Now run!

- thank you.
- you'd better run!

Oh my...

- ( siren whoops )
- here you are.

Thank you.

That was amazing.
You came out of nowhere.

- ma'am, are you okay?
- I didn't even see you.

Yeah, we're--
We're okay.

Do what
You have to do.

How did you--
How did you do that?

I never even saw you--

What was I going to do?
I saw that

And I had
To do something.

I can't believe
What I just witnessed.

Thank you
From the bottom
Of my heart.

Well, you're welcome.

You take good care
Of yourself, okay?

Thank you.
I'm a little shaken.

Shake it off.
Go get yourself
A drink or something.

- yeah.
- okay.

Wait, I never even
Asked your name.

It's larry--

Larry david.

Larry david?

Very funny.
Spread your legs.

That was amazing.
I mean, the way
You swept in

And took control--
That didn't seem real.

It was real.
I can tell you that.

I'm still
A little shaky,
I guess.

- it's to be expected.
My god.
- that guy--

- that strange,
Horrible man...
- horrible.

But you were just like
Clint eastwood.

I mean, you just
Swept in there and...

I have never seen
Anything that brave.

Eh, please, really.

I didn't even
Think twice about it.

The only thing I did
Think about for a second
Was my glasses,

But that's it--
Only the safety
Of my glasses.

'cause these are
Irreplaceable.

What do you do,
May I ask?

Oh, I'm a therapist.

- you're a therapist?
- yes.

Oh, boy, I could really
Use a therapist myself.

My wife left me
After a long time and--

I'm not going to bother you
With all this, you know.

That's all right.
Please.

Well, my wife
Left the house recently

And it's been
Quite devas--

- I'm sure it's--
- it's been quite
Devastating for me,

But anyway...

- I'm sorry.
- that's okay.

But I feel like
She never really

Had any idea
Who I was.

All this time,
All these years,

I really hid
The real me,

The me who saves people.

And, you know,
I have been doing that
Most of my life.

You know, I gave
A kidney to my friend...

Oh, I didn't know that.

Why would you?

No, I wouldn't.
I just--

All right, well,
I gotta go.

You are
Such a good person.

Do you know that?

- am I?
- oh...

Yes.

Okay.

So great
To have met you.

Yes.

I'd better get going.

You take care
Of yourself.

Well, thanks again.

So long.

Goodbye, larry david.

( gate buzzes )

Oh, wow.
Hey.

How are you doing?

Well, I'm in prison.

Yeah. Jesus.

I spent the night
In a cell

That's smaller
Than my closet.

Oh, man, oh, man.
I'm so sorry.

My feet stick out
Through the fucking bars.

- your feet stick out?
- yeah, my feet stick out.

- you're not even that tall.
- I know. I know.

I'm not even that tall,
And my fucking feet
Stick out.

- how tall are you?
- 5'10".

- you're 5'10"?
- yeah.

You're 5'10"?
Stand up. Let me see.

- you're not 5'10".
- I'm 5'10", I am.

Well, a hairsbreadth
Under.

You're cheating a little bit.
I don't think you're 5'10".

In the heel, I am--
That's not the point.

The point is
I'm sharing a room

With a 300-lb fucking guy
With a hairy back.

Sometimes you make friends
In a situation like this.

They become
Your friend for life.

He doesn't
Speak english.

Okay, all right.

Oh, good news:

After you were
Taken away...

Uh-huh.

...The therapist and I
Went to have coffee--

Whew, the plan worked
Fantastic.

I'm pretty optimistic.
And you know what?

Thank you.
'cause you were there
At its inception.

You pushed it through.

I'm very happy for you,

But it's not
Top of the list of
My priorities right now.

We're going to
Get you out of here.
Don't worry about it.

Do we have a time frame?
Can you give me
A time frame?

- 24 hours...
- okay, I think I can--

...48 at the most.

- what's after 48? 72?
- 72, yeah.

58, 68--
Right, 72.
And then...

Don't say "And then..."

What do you mean, 72?
That's beyond what--

...96?

Please, let's aim
For 24.

You got
A deck of cards?

Can you play
Solitaire or anything?
What can you do here?

I don't have a deck of cards,
But yes, I do know how
To play solitaire.

I should have brought
A deck of cards. Damn it.
It's always good

To have a deck of cards,
No matter where you are.

What are you talking about?
Just get me out of
Fucking prison.

I'm not talking
About cards.

Just get me out of
Fucking prison, please.

I'm sorry,
We're going to have to stop.

We have more time.

Cheryl's getting out
Of her therapy appointment

And I really need
To talk to her.

I've not spoken
To anyone normal
In 24 hours

And I'm scared.

We have to stop.

( whistles a tune )

- hello?
- oh, hi, cheryl.

How did your session
Go today?

Larry, I've spoken
To my therapist

And she told me
I shouldn't ever be
Speaking to you again.

She said that?

Yeah. I'm sorry,
Larry, really.

Are you kidding?

I should go.
I should go.
Goodbye, larry.

- hey, cheryl!
- ( hangs up )

Excuse me.
Excuse me.

Excuse me.

- hey.
- you're not gonna
Believe this:

Cheryl called me up,
Told me

That her therapist
Urged her--

Urged her
Never to see me again.

That makes
No sense whatsoever.

- oh my god.
- huh?

What?

She likes me.

Her therapist likes me.

That's why she told cheryl
Not to see me.

She wants me for herself.

- oh my god!
Oh my god!
- huh?

What am I going to do?

If I reject her,

She'll say bad things
About me to cheryl.

And if I'm nice to her,
She'll think I'm interested.

Oh, you are screwed.

I've got to
Get out of this.
What am I going to do?

I think you're fucked.
That's what I think.

Tommy!

- is that funkhouser?
- yeah.

What is he doing here?
He's supposed to be walking.

He's having
A cup of coffee?

Jeff: I'll see you later.

Hey.

L.D., how are
You doing, pal?

Where's your shirt?

What are you doing?
You're supposed
To be walking.

I raised money.
I don't walk.

You didn't tell me
You were sitting.

I wouldn't have given you
Money in the fist place.

- I didn't say I was walking.
- the walking's implied,
Is it not?

No, I said,
"Sponsor me
For the walkathon."

Okay, walkathon--
Walk.

Why do you want me
To walk?

You took money
Under false pretenses.

So you don't care
About alzheimer's?

Alzheimer's?

You were diagnosed
With alzheimer's?!

Yeah, and you're
The first person I've told.

I haven't told anybody.

You're the only one
Who knows.

- so this is just
The very earliest onset?
- yeah.

I mean, it's not early.
I'm sort of halfway

Between early and middle.
What's that called?

I don't know if there's
A term for that.

Maybe I have a quarter...?

I have to
Confess something.

After we met
And connected,

I was hoping that,
You know,

Maybe there was
Some kind of future.

In three to five years
I'll be a vegetable.

Listen, you helped me
The other day

And I want to help you.

I forgot your name.

You must go back
With your wife.

Hearing this news--
You must go back
With your wife.

Oh my god.
Yes, I know,
But what can you do?

Well, you never know.

Let's order.
I'm getting hungry.

- we did order.
- we did?

Yeah, you had
The chicken salad.

- I ordered chicken salad?
- yeah. Do you not like--?

- I don't even like
Chicken salad.
- oh my god.

- god damn it.
- no no no, we'll switch.

- excuse me, dr. Salvin?
- oh, yes.

I'm detective kennan,
L.A.P.D.

I talked to your assistant.
She told me I could

Find you here
With mr. David.

I have some questions
About your purse-snatching.

Now I understand you didn't
Get a look at the guy,
But that you did.

We actually have
The guy already.

I just want some
Basic information
So we can keep him.

So, what did he
Look like?

I-- I don't remember.

Aw, jeez.

( gate whirring )

There he is.
There's my guy.

Hey ya, bright.
Hey ya, bright boy.

Huh?

How's it going?

Uh, not too good.

What's the matter?
You seem a little down.

I don't know what
I'm gonna do with my life.

- really?
- yeah.

Oh, hey, get this:

I'm going out
With cheryl tonight.
I've got a date with cheryl.

- good.
- it's fantastic.
I'm so thrilled.

Come on.
I'm pretty excited,
Bright.

I think
It's going to work out.

( both cheering )

You did it.
That was--

There you go,
Big winner.

Hey...

That is so sweet.
Thank you.

- let's go
On the ferris wheel.
- okay.

Bright:
It's the most bizarre
Experience of my life

And I just need someone
To speak to about it

Because I can't work
And I can't sleep.

And you come
Highly recommended.

Why don't you start
From the beginning?

Um, well,
One of my clients

Is this bald guy, um...

I want you
To move back in with me.

You have till monday
To decide.

Okay.

- really?
- yeah.

- I love you, larry.
- I love you.

( phone ringing )

Hello?
Hi, dr. Salvin.

Ah.

Ah.