All language subtitles for Angel.S05E09.Harms.Way.720p.HULU.WEB-DL.AAC2.0.H.264-FFG_track3_[eng]

Welcome to the Los Angeles
branch of Wolfram and Hart,

the oldest and most powerful
law firm in the city.

Founded in 1791...

on ground deconsecrated
by the blood of mass-murderer
Matthias Pavane,

Wolfram and Hart has put roots
down in this glamorous city
that grow deep...

and branches that reach
right into the heart
of every major corporation,

including Yoyodyne,
Weyland-Yutani and News Corp.

That captain of industry?
We own his soul.

That fabulous movie queen?
She owes us her first born.

But times change,
and Wolfram and Hart is changing
right along with them.

Under our new C.E.O., Angel,

we're focusing less on power
and more on using that power
for good.

We have a zero-tolerance
policy for killing,

and that includes you, vampires.

That better be pig's blood, mister.

Yes, our esteemed president
has made it clear--

this is a new company
for the new millennium,
and he wants to work with you.

You know, if you don't kill,
we won't kill you.

That's right.
No more employee sacrifices.

At Wolfram and Hart,
you're part of a family now.

You can work your way
up the ladder,

and there'll always be
a hand to help you up it.

Every life and unlife...

is as important
to our new management
as their own.

So go ahead,
relax and enjoy your new
Wolfram and Hart family.

Because at our firm,
everyone matters.
You matter.

Buddy, you're going places.

♪ I got a song in my mind
I been singing it all day ♪

♪ I'm gonna teach you
tonight and morning,
answer when I say, hey ♪

♪
♪ Hey ♪

♪ When you hear me
start screaming, ♪

♪ Listen I ain't gonna quit ♪

♪ Gonna show you different sizes
that I guarantee will fit ♪

♪ When you hear a warm vibration
look out baby, this is it ♪

♪ Hey ♪

♪ I said, hey, Sah-Lo-Nee
Ah-Lo-Nee, Ah-Lo-Nee oh ♪

♪ Hey, Sah-Lo-Nee
Ah-Lo-Nee, Ah-Lo-Nee oh ♪

♪ I said, hey, Sah-Lo-Nee
Ah-Lo-Nee, Ah-Lo-Nee oh ♪

♪ Aha ♪

♪ Well, everybody says and does
it and he plays her anywhere ♪

- Morning, Mrs. Jacobi.
-

♪ Well, it's gotten really crazy
and it's got a lot of air ♪

♪ Hey, hey ♪

♪ When you hear me
start screaming, listen
I ain't gonna quit ♪

♪ Gonna show you different sizes
that I guarantee will fit ♪

♪ When you hear a warm vibration
look out baby, this is it ♪

♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪

♪ I said, hey, Sah-Lo-Nee
Ah-Lo-Nee, Ah-Lo-Nee oh ♪

♪ Hey, Sah-Lo-Nee
Ah-Lo-Nee, Ah-Lo-Nee oh ♪

♪ I said, hey, Sah-Lo-Nee
Ah-Lo-Nee, Ah-Lo-Nee oh ♪

♪ Hey, Sah-Lo-Nee
Ah-Lo-Nee, Ah-Lo-Nee oh ♪

♪
Excuse me.

You know,
I should go.

Ohhh! Hey!

Sorry.

So then, 2:00 a.m.
my boss calls me,

wants me to search her car for,
get this, a stray Vicodin.

- Shut up.
- Hello, fellow grunts.

Hey.

I mean, making me drop off
her stool sample was one thing.

But this?
I'm so asking for a raise.

Yeah! You know, I was thinking
I've been due for a raise too,
'cause--

Oh, did I tell you?
That cute new shaman's
in my department now.

Mm. He was
in my training class. Right.

Nice chatting with you too.
Bye-bye.

Which actually
makes him sexier.

Hey.

Morning.
You just can't--
There are rules.

Oh, I know. It's so unfair.

Just because my boss
is your boss's boss,

his needs
coming first and all.

See ya.

So, you've got
the department heads
at 11:00.

Your 1:00
with Mistress Shriva
from Human--

sorry-- Nonhuman Resources
got moved to 2:00.

Swung by the cleaners.
Zippo luck getting out
the Frophla slime.

Oh, and I took care
of the catering...

for the big feuding
demon-clan confab--

unless you have
any requests.

Yeah, uh, okay.
Could you spell that?

- Oh.

Let me take your staff.

Sheesh.
My clicks are all wrong.

You figure out the catering
for tomorrow?

Hello! I just--

Ready to do this thing?

So, about
the, uh, catering,

I really
went above and beyond,

'cause I know this is very--

You're welcome.

You're up today.
Oh, come on, Rudy.

You know I've been off
the human blood for months.

Company policy.
Give me the finger.

Good morning.
Wolfram and-- Ow!

Uh, sorry. Wrong extension.
You need 529 for Curses.

Foiled again, huh?

Hello?
You're clean.
Have a good one.

Eli. Hi.

Hey... you.

I just got called up
for a meeting
with your boss man.

- Really? I didn't see any--
- I don't want to count
my hatchlings,

but I think the honchos are
finally starting to recognize
my work in Accounting.

- Hey. Good for you.
- Eli. Come on in.

Wish me luck, kiddo.

Ohhh.

Angel, you forgot your--

Get that cleaned up,
would you?

I just-- I don't get it.
Why'd you kill Eli?

Didn't much like what he was
doing in his off-hours.

Well, that's not right.

- What Eli did on his own time--
- Is dismember virgins.

Oh. Well, a person's religious
beliefs is no cause for--

He did it for his own amusement.

Oh. Well, okay.

Still, couldn't you have
given him a stern warning
or something first?

It's called
a zero-tolerance policy,
not a "maybe-this-once" policy.

Nobody in this office
gets away with murder.

Not anymore.

Ohhh. Lemme guess.
Position just open up
in Accounting?

Hardest part of the job--
terminating an employee.

Once again,
keeping corporate America
safe from evil.

- Spike.
- I was wonderin'
when you'd turn up.

Where have you been?
It's been days.

Out enjoying freedom
from my ghostly confines, luv.

There haven't been any
side effects since you
recorporealized, have there?

Bit of a hangover,
but that's to be expected
after all the drinking.

Just thought I'd swing by
and say my final farewells.

- You're leaving?
- You catch on quick, don't you?

Yeah, thought I'd push off,
seeing as how I got somebody
waiting for me.

Angel, I'm not sure that's wise,

given the Shanshu prophesy
is still unresolved.

That's your problem, mate.

You're welcome
to that heroic destiny,
whether you deserve it or not.

Me, I got better things to do
than wait around for
the four bloody horsemen.

- Spike.
- Let him go.

Yeah, here's the thing.

Could use a little
walking-around money.
How 'bout a few hundred?

- How 'bout, no?
- Typical, you cheap sod.

Right, then.
Settle for some wheels.

If it's gonna get you
out of here faster, fine.

- Just not the Viper.
- Viper it is, then.

- Any message for Buffy?
- Tell her you're a moron.

Well, bon voyage, Spikester.

Don't be a stranger.

Fred.

I want you to know, uh--

I mean, all that work
you put in tryin' to
cure me of the ghosties--

I didn't do anything.

Oh, you did.
You-- You believed in--

I mean, you tried.
I won't forget that.

You're welcome.

Oh, what?

I don't get a good-bye
just because I went crazy...

and tried to rip your throat out
while we were having sex?

Keep it simple, Harm.
It suits you.

This is war. Two demon clans,
the Vinjis and the Sahrvin.

They've been battling it out
for five generations.

Way back when,
clans got along okay.

Shared a few hundred miles
of desert, traded livestock,

and even partied together
once in a while.

Then a Vinji used the wrong fork
at a Sahrvin bonding ceremony.

Sahrvins took offense,
and they've been slaughtering
each other ever since.

You're saying
this whole thing started
over a fork faux pas?

They're pretty finicky
about manners.

But the clans have agreed
to negotiate a truce--

- Here, tomorrow.
- Why now?

Demon rights activist
by the name of Tobias Dupree
got involved.

He's liaison to both clans--
only guy in the world
they all trust.

And he called us for help.

Etiquette aside,
the Vinji and Sahrvin
are notoriously vicious.

Why not let them
wipe each other out?

I got no love for these guys.
But we manage to push
through a peace plan,

the whole demon world's
gonna know we got game.

That makes sense,
in a kind of gray,
Machiavellian kind of way.

Obviously, both clans
are sensitive
to the smallest slight.

We don't dot an "I"
or cross a "T,"

this whole thing
could explode in our faces.

This is a complete list
of manners and customs.

We should probably
all memorize this.

Apparently, gazing
at a Vinji's ankles can
lead to eye-gouging.

Ah. Hey, come on, Dandido.
Come on.

He gets a wee shy
around the big boss.
All the way in, yeah.

I, uh, finished
the seating chart.

All right. This kid
was up all night, jigsawing
who's going where tomorrow.

He's a real up-and-comer,
this one.

My lab managed that
upgrade to the weapons scanner,
like you requested.

- Foolproof?
- I'd say yes,

but then some fool
would just come along
and sneak something past us.

But it's still
state of the art.

And since none of the clan
representatives speak English,

- I'll be doing
most of the talking.
- You?

Yeah. Along with the law
and the Gilbert and Sullivan,

also got me
a few demon languages
in the brain upload.

So aside from forks, ankles
and us not knowing
what they're saying,

any other
potential minefields?

All their etiquette issues
go along with a healthy dose
of superstition.

You don't know the half of it.
I've been doing a whole bunch
of research on these guys,

their customs and stuff.

Did you know
that they think poodles
are wicked bad luck?

Harmony,
I'm glad you're here.

We'll be needing lunch.

We should order
before the crush.
Not Thai again.

Something lighter.

Burkle's always
giving Mr. Gunn the eye.

I heard they
used to be a thing.
I don't know.

Alice said
she and that Knox guy
are pretty friendly.

Maybe she's sleeping
with both of 'em.

That's what I'd do.

Don't forget about Wesley.
I get the vibe that he's
totally crushing over Fred.

Mr. Wyndam-Pryce?

Everyone knows he's--
Muffins!

They're from Lorne--
actually from Shaq,

but Lorne's
declared his office
a carb-free zone.

- He's totally grooming you.
- You think?

He does call me
"Dan the Man."

- Angel grooms me too.
- Explains the haircut.

I'm his right arm.
He's taking me places.

We're so connected.

Yeah, boss?
Harmony, get the hell
down here. Now!

Uh, sure.
No. No, trouble at all.

That's what I'm here for. Bye.

Harmony!

You want to
explain this?

Okay. This is totally my fault.

I specifically told the caterers
the delivery was for tomorrow.

But I should've
called to confirm.

You know caterers--
not the best listeners.

- Oh!

Harmony, uh, got us a camel.

Like I said,
I did a lot of research.

Camel meat's a delicacy.

So I thought
it would be a great way
to kick off the summit,

'cause of the clans
being so uptight.

Like... comfort food.

Comfort food?
Uh-huh.

And as host, you get the honor
of slicing off its hump...

and sticking a hot poker
through its heart.

And then the demon leaders
rip apart its carcass
with their bare hands.

Are you--

I don't even know h-how--

Uh, maybe the camel
was the wrong way to go.

You were supposed to answer
the phones, make appointments
and anticipate my needs,

which does not include
a petting zoo in my lobby.

Okay, but... the caterer
said no returns.

Get it out of here.

Maybe you could
go with a nice cheese platter.

Or chips and dip.
Chips and dip would be fine.

I did everything right.
This is what they eat.

Angel's just
feeling a little off,

and he-he's not in the mood
to, you know, butcher a camel.

No, he hates me!
No!

He'll get over it.

Everybody hates me.

I-- I don't hate you.

I mean, it's just I don't
know you that well, and--

What are you doing
after work?

And the worst part is,
I can't even quit.

I don't have
anywhere else to go.

I'm sure that's not--

Really?

I tried being out on my own,
all independent and evil.

I'm just no good at it.
But-- But, I mean,
isn't that a good thing?

Not like everything's
so great now.

You heard Angel.
I'm useless.

Harmony,
it was one mistake.

And you can't take everything
Angel says so personally.

He-- He has a lot
on his mind.

I just wish
I were more like you.

You know,
except for the part about
being all into science,

and not having
a lot up front.

I mean, you have
two hot guys after you.

I do?

All the girls,
they think it's Knox and Gunn.

Of course,
I know it's Knox and Wesley.
Not that they'd listen.

It is Knox and Wes, right?

Yeah. I mean, no!
I-- I don't know.

We all work together,
and there's a lot of baggage
and--

Why am I telling you this?

Because
we're totally bonding.

We're, like, gal pals.
This is awesome.

You can teach me about life,
and I can teach you
how to dress better.

Oh.

They are both kinda hot,
aren't they?

Knox and Wes. I--

Wait. Why is everyone
at the office so interested
in who I might be dating?

Because you're at the top.
People want to know what's
happening with the bigwigs.

You'd think
they'd ask me, but--

Why don't they?

Harmony, do you--
do you not have
many friends at work?

I just--
I don't get it.

I used to be way popular
in high school.

Just since I got
vamped at my graduation,

I've had trouble
connecting with people.

Well, maybe you should,

you know,
put yourself out there more.

I mean, lots of
Wolfram and Hart people
hang out right here.

- You should mingle.
- They're all straight.

Nonvamps.

I gravitate more towards
the undead variety.

Well, there's your problem.

The undead,
they're not exactly givers.

I'm sure there are tons
of straight guys who would
love to get to know you.

Well, there is one
at the bar.

Don't!

I think
he's checking me out.

You should go talk to him.

Oh, no.
I couldn't.

I'm hanging
with my gal pal.

I would never
do that to you.

Don't be silly.
I'd be fine if--
Okay. Bye.

Oh, what do I say?

Oh, um, just say "Hi"
and introduce yourself.

I bet he takes it
from there.

Right. But what
if he doesn't take it?

Well, questions
are always good.

Ask him where he's from
and what he does for a living.

Cover the boring stuff.

Only maybe
act like it's not...

boring.

I can do that.

Well, don't watch me.

I'll just, um--

I'll just go.

Hi.

I'm Harmony.
Well, hi, Harmony.
It's nice to meet you.

Where are you from?

The Bay Area originally,
but--
Uh-huh.

Interesting.

What do you do
for a living?

Why don't
I get you a drink?

You look thirsty.

Ahhh. Mm. Mmm.

Ohhh.

Uh... Tim?

Trevor?

George?

Apparently you and I--
you know.

And I'm sure
I rocked your world and all,

but I gotta go to work,
so--

Hello?

Oops.

Ohhh.

Ohhh!

Hi, Mrs. Jacobi.

Oh, crapola!

Have a nice day,
Mrs. Jacobi.

Okay, just act normal.

Hi! How's it hangin'?
Love the pocket square.

Blood.
Where?

That's what I'd like to know.
Where is my blood?

Harmony, I got
the demon summit today,
and you're late and--

What are you doing?

Desk crunches.

Get fit while you sit.

You should see my abs.
You wanna?

Mug o' blood,
comin' right up, boss.

Harmony.
Huh?

I can't afford to have
anything go wrong today.

What--
What could go wrong?

Okay.

- I remember the talking.

"Hi, I'm Harmony."
"You look thirsty."

"Well, why don't I drink
a couple quarts of your blood
then, Tom--"

Terry?
Ohhh.

Drinking.
That's my problem.

Too much drinking.

I don't even remember
taking him home.

Damn lemon drops.
I never should've--

Fred.

She made me talk to him.
She's responsible for--

- You did it again.
- It's not my fault!

- What?

You can't blame me
because Angel gets grumpy
when he's hungry.

Oh.
Stress eating.

Angel's all
about the summit,

and, you know,
I'm his right arm,

so the stress and the--

Mm.

Hi, boss. There was
a line at the microwave?

I'm coming.

That's right, chips and dip.

I know. I told him.
He just--

Wildebeest.
Really?

No, we better stick
with the chip-dip thing.

Thanks. Okay!

It's all peachy.
Just get through the day
and I'm home--

Ohhh.

Angel's office.

One moment, please.

Yeah?

There's a Detective Griffin
for you.

Put him through.

It's Angel.

Yeah, this is Dave Griffin, L.A.P.D.

Thought you'd want to know,
found a body this morning.
Vampire attack.

It looks like he--
Hold on.

Harmony, I got it!

Oh.

Oh, God.

Oh, God.

Oh, God, oh, God, oh, God,
oh, God, oh, God.

You know
what this is about?

Perhaps one of the Vinjis
set down a teacup improperly.

Worse.
Just got off the phone
with L.A.P.D.

- They found a body.
- Where? Did he say where?

The city dump,
wrapped in a laundry bag.

- And the police
called because?
- We own them.

- Right, makes sense.
- Of course.

Well, that, and they found
my card on the victim.

It was the liaison
between the feuding clans.

- Toby Dupree?
- Toby! That was his...

name. Really?

Huh. You don't hear
unusual names like that anymore.

We're gonna have to do
some serious damage control.

You think? Demon rights activist
gets munched by a vamp
on our watch?

- He told me he was an astronaut.
- No telling how the clans
are gonna take this.

Superstitious as they are,
they may see it as an omen
or--

So this cop, he doesn't have
any actual real info, right?

It is possible that someone's
trying to send a message,
derail the summit.

Ooh, yeah!
That must be it.

The derailing thing, that--
that makes sense.

Right?

"The Vinji clan
is deeply concerned
about this turn of events."

- Perhaps if you say something.
- Oh, no. I'm not ready.

Look, just tell 'em
that the summit can proceed
as planned.

That they shouldn't, you know,
start skinning each other.

- They're lookin' for vengeance.
- Tell 'em we're on it.

- What happened to you
not saying anything?
- I got caught up.

- Obviously a mistake.
- Forgive and forget, I say.
It's the golden rule.

These guys are not gonna
forgive, and they're definitely
not gonna forget...

until we figure out--
Who killed Dupree. I know.

Fred will be able
to tell us some more soon.

Dupree's body
should be in the lab by now.

Lab? Our lab?

Shouldn't take long to track
down the vampire who did this,

set things right.

Significant postmortem battering...

suggests prior relationship
with the victim.

Consulting coroner puts
time of death at approximately
1:30 a.m., which--

Oh, Harmony.

Hi. I just thought
I'd pop in to see--

Angel sent you,
didn't he?
Angel?

He's all antsy
about the demon summit, so he
sent you here to rush me,

only he doesn't want to
seem like he sent you here
to rush me,

so he told you to act all--
like that.

Oh! Yeah. Totally.
You know our Angel.

So, what do you know?
Do you know who did it?

The body's only been here
20 minutes.

Uh-huh. And don't you
think it's possible...

that whoever did it
could have blacked out...

and doesn't even remember
doing it, so it's totally
not their fault?

I-- I guess.

Oh, hey. You know,
last night was actually--

I mean, I really had
kind of a nice time.

Huh? Ohhh!
Yeah. Me too.

Bite marks
are 17 millimeters apart,

six millimeters deep,
on the right side of the neck.

Well, that doesn't
sound like much to go on.

The size and depth of the wound
indicate a female vampire.

- Or gay!

Um, it doesn't really
work like that.

Anyway, if you wanna
hang out again sometime,

we could grab some wine,
jam to the Dixie Chicks.

Oh, gee. You know,
my schedule's
kinda packed right--

Hey.
What?

Something you wanna tell me?

Tell... what?

The guy at the bar.
I wanna hear all about it.

Ohhh, that.

Uh, well... loser.

Big. Told me
he was an astronaut.

Like anyone
would believe that.

I know.
Well, I'd better--

Okay, that's it.

I gotta get outta here,
leave the country.

Maybe Mexico.
Yeah, I like Mexico.

Or Cancun.
I hear that's--

Anyway, I'll--
I'll start over,
change my name.

Harmonita.
That's kind of pret--

Bitten on the right.

He was bitten on the right!

Oh, my God! I didn't do it!

Ouch!
You sound just like
my six-year-old.

Yeah. He's always
sayin' that--

Yeah, well, I'm talkin'
first-degree murder.

Yeah, mine, if these demons
find out we're short
four gift bags.

Hey, Lorraine,
you're a lifesaver.

Harmonica, Harmonica.
Hey, hey. You seen Danny around?

I need him to,
you know--
Oh, no.

So, just curious--

You know those
random blood tests?
Where do they go?

Well, the results get
automatically transmitted
down to the lab, I think.

Uh-huh.
And then, uh, they--

Did you just hear that?
Hear what?

Harmony.
I can explain.

Y-You don't have to
explain anything.

I just have to
get something out of my--

I left my autoclave on.

It's not what you think!

Okay, so your test
came back positive.

You slipped,
had some human blood.

Maybe it was consensual
or--
There was nothing.

I mean, I think
there was something.

I don't remember exactly.

I think somebody
must've drugged me.

I was at the bar,
and then I woke up,
and he was there.

Wait. He?

He. Him!

The guy you made me talk to.

Oh, God. He's him?

I didn't kill him.
I'm innocent.

See, 'cause you said
he was bitten on the right.

- I'm a right-biter.
- Uh--

Look.
Ahhh!

See? Right-biter.
Harmony, stop!

I lean right, which means
I bite you on your--
Left. I get it. Left.

Right.
I mean correct.

And since he was
bitten on his right,

he had to have been
bitten by a left-biter.

Ergo, not me.

Okay. That's a...

very convincing argument, Harmony,

e-except your blood test
came back positive.

Yeah, I know, but that's--
It couldn't.

It's a mistake,
or I drank it accidentally,
or--

Somebody spiked my thermos.

- Why would anyone--
- I don't know.

Because... the summit!

Someone wants to ruin it or--
What are you doing?

I wanna believe you,
Harmony. I do.

I think if we just call
and explain what happened
to Angel--

No. Zero-tolerance policy, remember?

- He can help.
- He's not a helper.
He's a chopper.

- He'll cut my head off
before I get two words--
- He-- He won't.

I'm not a killer!

Well, I am.

But I've been clean
for eight months.

Except for today,
but that is different,
because it's not me.

Angel will listen.
I promise.

He'll-- He'll want to
hear what you have to say...

and he'll understand.

Don't worry. Everything
will be fine. Okay?

I'm totally sorry
I have to do this.

And you guys are being
super understanding.

It's just till I clear my name.
I so owe you guys dinner.

Okay, okay, okay.

So I'm being set up.

Somebody put blood
in my blood.

Human blood in my thermos.

So... fingerprints.
Right. Gotta get my thermos.

- What?

What is she saying?
They wanna walk.

- I told her--
- I got the general idea.
What do they want?

- That ain't good.

- What?
- Seems it's bad luck
to get things goin'...

before we cough up
a little eye for an eye.

Seein' as we don't have
the actual bad guy, they're
willing to accept a substitute.

They want a blood sacrifice.
Harmony!

A person makes
one little mistake--

Find Fred. I want to know
what she got off the body.

Fred? Right.

I'm on it.

Aha!
The smoking thermos.

- What?
- Trying to get rid
of the evidence?

What evidence?
I was just trying to get
to Lorne's protein snack.

Ha! You expect me
to believe that?

Go on. Admit it!
Admit what?

That you stole my thermos
and filled it with human blood!

Human-- What?

It is so totally obvious!
You hate me!

You've probably been
watching me sweat all day,
laughing!

Hate you?
I don't care about you
enough to hate you.

- Hey! Leave him alone.
- Mind your own business!

You murdered that guy
and put him in my bed!

Murdered? Oh, God!

You did this to me,
and now you're gonna
confess!

I'm-- I'm-- I'm sorry!
I didn't-- What guy?

P-P-Please! I swear, I--
Don't kill me!

What the--

What'd you do that for?
To make it
look like you did.

Why would you wanna--

Hey. It was you!

Who are you?

You don't remember?

Think steno pool.

I sat next to you.

Sambuca.
Tamika!

Right!

Yeah, well,
you were only there for,
what was it, five weeks?

- More like four and a half.
- I have been there
for five years.

I type 80 words a minute.
I have an exceptionally
pleasant phone voice!

But you're the one
who sits at the best desk
in the building.

You're the one
in the in-crowd.

You think I'm in the in-crowd?

Oh, I see you in all
the important meetings.

You're on
the fast track.

Well, that's
all about to change.

I have witnesses
who saw you attack Danny.

And when Mr. Angel
hears that I saved him,

your job will be mine
by the end of the day.

You're forgetting one thing.
Kinda have the advantage.

- Kinda not.
- Oh.

I should've smelled you!

You would've
if you wore less
of that tacky perfume.

Chanel's not tacky!

I saw you at that bar,

and I said to myself,
"This is it, Tamika.
This is your chance."

So I slipped a roofie
in your drink while you
were busy slutting it up.

Then I followed you
back to your place
with that guy.

I waited
till you passed out,

then I broke in,
had myself a little snack.

That is just--
Ohhh!

I am so gonna kick your ass!

Dust can't kick.

You're gonna
tell Angel the truth.

You wanna know
the first thing I'm gonna do
when I get your desk?

Smash all of those
stupid, ugly-ass unicorns!

And then
you're gonna tell Angel
how you stole my thermos...

and filled it with human blood,
and how you tricked me.

Aaah! Ow! Ow!

My lips? Sealed.

The key? Lost it!

Funny how
that wasn't on the tape.
They're still demanding a--

I didn't mean
to do that yet.

I can explain?

You should've
just come to me.

Gee, I wish I would've
thought of telling her that.

I'm really, really sorry,
you guys.

I totally wouldn't
have hit you over the head
and put you in the closet...

if I didn't have
a really good reason.

It's just...

I was scared and...

I know you never wanted me
as your assistant, and--

Okay, I've made
some bad choices.

I mean,
it's not like I have a soul.
I have to try a lot harder.

How's it going
in there?

Well, so far
no heads are rollin'.
How about in here?

Harmony could have
handled it better,

but she didn't kill anyone.

You'll be clean in two days.
But I'll be watchin' you.

I know.

He won't have to
be watching, 'cause--

I'll just pack up my desk.

Harmony,

just bring us some coffee.

So I saved the summit
by killing the skank
who tried to frame me,

and all I get is,
"Get me some coffee."

You believe that?

Oh. Hey, can I get another,
but with one of those
little umbrellas?

We're out.
Right. Figures.

Yeah, life's
an ever-lovin' bitch,
isn't it?

What are you doing here?
At the moment, hearin' a bit
of your story of woe.

But what happened
to Europe?

Aren't you supposed to be
Slayer-chasing or something?

I was on my way.
Had a boat ticket and all.

Then I put a little thinkin'
into it.

A man can't go out
in a bloody blaze of glory,
savin' the world,

and then show up
three months later,

tumbling off a cruise ship
in the south of France.

I mean, I'd love to,
don't get me wrong.

But, uh, it's hard
to top an exit like that.

Come on. Girls don't care
about stuff like that.

Just one look at you,
and she'll forget herself.

She'll get all tingly,
and it won't matter how horribly
you treated her in the past,

and how you took her
for granted, and--

Hey, I never took her for gr--

Oh.

Well, I'd expect Buffy
would be happy enough
to see me.

It's just I gave up
my life for her, the world,

and if I show up now,
flesh and bone,

a grand finale
won't hold much weight.

All of it won't matter.

Yeah.
Not mattering.

I know that feeling well.

Oh, come on, Harm.
You matter to someone.

- I do?
- Yeah.

Girl tried to
frame you, didn't she?
Must've mattered to her.

Everybody's
talking about it.

You're right.

That girl hated me.
She wanted me dead.

- I matter.
- Yeah.

Grr! Arrgh!