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1
00:00:02,870 --> 00:00:06,507
Cheers is filmed before
A live studio audience.
2
00:00:06,507 --> 00:00:08,842
Hey, man,
Where's this relief
Waitress you hired?
3
00:00:08,842 --> 00:00:10,644
Don't worry, sam.
4
00:00:10,644 --> 00:00:13,314
She's a great waitress,
A complete professional.
5
00:00:13,314 --> 00:00:15,383
Well, how come
She's not here?
6
00:00:15,383 --> 00:00:17,685
She called and said she'd
Be about 20 minutes late.
7
00:00:17,685 --> 00:00:21,122
She want to get in
All her breaks
Before she starts.
8
00:00:24,958 --> 00:00:27,595
There she is.
Corinne, over here.
9
00:00:29,463 --> 00:00:31,399
When you asked them
For a waitress,
10
00:00:31,399 --> 00:00:34,535
Did you tell them
This was a bar,
Not a truck stop?
11
00:00:36,070 --> 00:00:38,072
Hi, honey.
Is this it?
12
00:00:38,072 --> 00:00:39,307
Yup.
13
00:00:39,307 --> 00:00:41,742
Corinne, this is my boss,
Sam malone.
14
00:00:41,742 --> 00:00:44,778
Hi, honey. Just give
Me some checks,
And we're all set.
15
00:00:44,778 --> 00:00:47,981
Ok. Woody,
Why don't you show
Her where they are?
16
00:00:47,981 --> 00:00:49,783
It's right down here.
17
00:00:49,783 --> 00:00:52,986
Would you look at
The size of this place!
18
00:00:52,986 --> 00:00:55,489
My dogs will be
Barking tonight.
19
00:00:57,458 --> 00:00:59,460
Pardon me.
Am I mistaken,
20
00:00:59,460 --> 00:01:01,762
Or did you used
To work at the
Hungry heifer?
21
00:01:01,762 --> 00:01:03,030
Sure, I worked there.
22
00:01:03,030 --> 00:01:05,032
Say, I know you!
23
00:01:05,032 --> 00:01:07,735
The girls there
Had a pet name for you.
24
00:01:07,735 --> 00:01:08,936
What was that?
25
00:01:08,936 --> 00:01:11,071
That guy
Who comes back.
26
00:01:14,175 --> 00:01:15,509
Thanks for helping out.
27
00:01:15,509 --> 00:01:17,211
From now on, let me
Pick the waitresses.
28
00:01:17,211 --> 00:01:20,181
My customers are used
To something with a
Little more sex appeal.
29
00:01:23,584 --> 00:01:25,153
Sam.
30
00:01:25,153 --> 00:01:27,655
Where did you
Get the fox?
31
00:01:36,096 --> 00:01:38,399
* making your way
In the world today *
32
00:01:38,399 --> 00:01:41,535
* takes everything
You've got *
33
00:01:41,535 --> 00:01:44,238
* taking a break
From all your worries *
34
00:01:44,238 --> 00:01:47,541
* sure would help a lot *
35
00:01:47,541 --> 00:01:50,744
* wouldn't you like
To get away? *
36
00:01:53,514 --> 00:01:55,583
* sometimes
You wanna go *
37
00:01:55,583 --> 00:02:00,721
* where everybody
Knows your name *
38
00:02:00,721 --> 00:02:05,426
* and they're always
Glad you came *
39
00:02:05,426 --> 00:02:07,795
* you wanna be
Where you can see *
40
00:02:07,795 --> 00:02:10,564
* our troubles
Are all the same *
41
00:02:10,564 --> 00:02:14,768
* you wanna be where
Everybody knows your name *
42
00:02:15,836 --> 00:02:18,406
* you wanna go
Where people know *
43
00:02:18,406 --> 00:02:20,941
* people are all the same *
44
00:02:20,941 --> 00:02:25,646
* you wanna go where
Everybody knows your name *
45
00:02:44,898 --> 00:02:45,999
Afternoon, everybody.
46
00:02:45,999 --> 00:02:47,801
Norm!
Norm!
Norm!
47
00:02:47,801 --> 00:02:49,603
How's life in the
Fast lane, normie?
48
00:02:49,603 --> 00:02:52,172
Beats me. I can't
Find the on-ramp.
49
00:02:52,172 --> 00:02:56,143
Hey, hey, your brow
Is a little furrowed,
There, my friend.
50
00:02:56,143 --> 00:02:57,845
What's the boney,
Maroney?
51
00:02:57,845 --> 00:02:59,580
Vera is
Getting the urge
52
00:02:59,580 --> 00:03:01,215
To go on
Vacation again.
53
00:03:01,215 --> 00:03:02,616
Uh-oh.
54
00:03:02,616 --> 00:03:04,552
Don't worry. It'll pass.
Happens every year.
55
00:03:04,552 --> 00:03:06,487
I think she's
Serious this time.
56
00:03:06,487 --> 00:03:08,522
Maps have been
Unfolded.
57
00:03:08,522 --> 00:03:09,457
Ooh!
58
00:03:09,457 --> 00:03:10,824
Where does
She want to go?
59
00:03:10,824 --> 00:03:14,295
The tropics. Says she
Wants to lay in the sand
60
00:03:14,295 --> 00:03:15,863
And bake in the sun.
61
00:03:15,863 --> 00:03:18,899
I offered a compromise. I said,
Just turn up the radiator
62
00:03:18,899 --> 00:03:22,135
And stick your feet
In the cat box, but...
63
00:03:22,135 --> 00:03:23,737
And she didn't
Go for that?
64
00:03:23,737 --> 00:03:25,606
No, no. It's my own
Damn fault.
65
00:03:25,606 --> 00:03:28,309
You know, I think
I spoil that woman.
66
00:03:29,443 --> 00:03:31,945
Mr. Peterson,
If you want
67
00:03:31,945 --> 00:03:33,581
The vacation
Of a lifetime
68
00:03:33,581 --> 00:03:35,249
Without spending
A fortune,
69
00:03:35,249 --> 00:03:37,418
I have one word
For you--
70
00:03:37,418 --> 00:03:39,420
Hanover, indiana.
71
00:03:40,521 --> 00:03:42,256
All right.
What would I do
72
00:03:42,256 --> 00:03:44,258
For excitement in, say,
Hanover, indiana?
73
00:03:44,258 --> 00:03:45,993
If you leave
Right away,
74
00:03:45,993 --> 00:03:47,561
You can catch
The corn parade.
75
00:03:47,561 --> 00:03:49,062
That's kind
Of like the
Rose parade,
76
00:03:49,062 --> 00:03:51,665
But instead of
Using flowers
For the float--
77
00:03:51,665 --> 00:03:52,900
They use corn.
78
00:03:52,900 --> 00:03:54,935
You've heard of it!
79
00:03:54,935 --> 00:03:57,104
[telephone rings]
80
00:03:57,104 --> 00:03:58,406
Well, hold on
A second.
81
00:03:58,406 --> 00:03:59,673
Carla,
It's for you.
82
00:03:59,673 --> 00:04:00,841
Who is it?
83
00:04:00,841 --> 00:04:03,143
I don't know. It's one
Of your daughters.
84
00:04:03,143 --> 00:04:04,545
Which one?
85
00:04:04,545 --> 00:04:07,348
I couldn't tell.
It sounded
Like humanity.
86
00:04:07,348 --> 00:04:08,582
It's anne marie.
87
00:04:08,582 --> 00:04:10,684
She's wearing a
Retainer on her teeth,
88
00:04:10,684 --> 00:04:12,853
And she's feeling
A little insecure.
89
00:04:14,021 --> 00:04:15,889
Anne marie.
90
00:04:15,889 --> 00:04:20,661
No. I didn't know it was you
From your ugly voice.
91
00:04:20,661 --> 00:04:23,764
No. Anne marie, people are
Not going to make fun of you
92
00:04:23,764 --> 00:04:26,233
Every time you
Open your mouth.
93
00:04:26,233 --> 00:04:29,970
Honey, your family
Are not people.
94
00:04:29,970 --> 00:04:31,905
Yeah. Right. Good-bye.
95
00:04:34,975 --> 00:04:36,744
Poor kid.
96
00:04:36,744 --> 00:04:39,046
I remember when I was
At that awkward age.
97
00:04:39,046 --> 00:04:41,682
Any little difference
Between me and
The other children,
98
00:04:41,682 --> 00:04:44,618
And I was embarrassed
And humiliated
99
00:04:44,618 --> 00:04:47,020
In front of what felt
Like the world.
100
00:04:47,020 --> 00:04:50,123
Hi, diane.
101
00:04:50,123 --> 00:04:52,593
And on it goes, huh?
102
00:04:55,195 --> 00:04:57,130
You left your sweater
In my apartment.
103
00:04:57,130 --> 00:05:00,368
Oh. Thank you,
Dennis.
104
00:05:02,403 --> 00:05:04,605
And thanks for
Bringing it by
105
00:05:04,605 --> 00:05:06,807
And this
All too-brief visit.
106
00:05:06,807 --> 00:05:09,577
Why are you
Dressed like that?
107
00:05:09,577 --> 00:05:11,311
I'm working
The renaissance fair.
108
00:05:11,311 --> 00:05:13,381
Don't they have
Dressing rooms there?
109
00:05:13,381 --> 00:05:15,483
I thought you'd get
A kick out of it.
110
00:05:15,483 --> 00:05:17,084
You said it was
Your favorite era.
111
00:05:17,084 --> 00:05:19,520
Dennis, there's
A time and place
For everything,
112
00:05:19,520 --> 00:05:22,289
And the time
For this was
The 14th century.
113
00:05:22,289 --> 00:05:24,257
Oh...
114
00:05:24,257 --> 00:05:25,993
I'm sorry.
115
00:05:25,993 --> 00:05:29,329
So, are we still on
For saturday night?
116
00:05:29,329 --> 00:05:31,999
Uh...Next saturday
Would be impossible.
117
00:05:31,999 --> 00:05:34,768
You don't want to go out
With me again, do you?
118
00:05:34,768 --> 00:05:36,336
I didn't say that,
Dennis.
119
00:05:36,336 --> 00:05:37,638
You're putting words
In my mouth.
120
00:05:37,638 --> 00:05:39,640
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to.
121
00:05:39,640 --> 00:05:42,109
No, no. They're
The right words.
122
00:05:44,545 --> 00:05:46,980
I'll give you
A call, dennis.
123
00:05:51,652 --> 00:05:54,354
All right. All right.
I know it's coming.
124
00:05:54,354 --> 00:05:55,956
Let's get on with it.
125
00:05:55,956 --> 00:05:58,291
What?
What are you
Talking about?
126
00:05:58,291 --> 00:05:59,693
You know--dennis.
127
00:05:59,693 --> 00:06:01,929
He didn't, well...
128
00:06:01,929 --> 00:06:04,865
He didn't look
Very ordinary.
129
00:06:04,865 --> 00:06:06,266
Oh, nonsense!
130
00:06:06,266 --> 00:06:07,901
I thought
He looked great...
131
00:06:07,901 --> 00:06:11,505
Especially if he was
Going to spend the day
In sherwood forest.
132
00:06:13,206 --> 00:06:15,142
You're not
Being very fair.
133
00:06:15,142 --> 00:06:17,144
Dennis is a really
Special guy.
134
00:06:17,144 --> 00:06:18,446
And I sensed
That, diane.
135
00:06:18,446 --> 00:06:19,580
I said
To myself--
136
00:06:19,580 --> 00:06:21,615
As soon as
He walked in,
I said,
137
00:06:21,615 --> 00:06:23,851
"Now, there's
A sissy with
A dream."
138
00:06:27,455 --> 00:06:29,923
Dennis kaufman is a
Brilliant puppeteer.
139
00:06:29,923 --> 00:06:32,259
He does a wonderful
Punch and judy.
140
00:06:32,259 --> 00:06:33,727
He better have
A wonderful punch
141
00:06:33,727 --> 00:06:36,063
If he's gonna
Dress like judy.
142
00:06:38,131 --> 00:06:39,433
You really
Pick them, diane.
143
00:06:39,433 --> 00:06:41,769
Next to him, even frasier
Looks like rambo.
144
00:06:47,274 --> 00:06:49,242
Look what I have
Stooped to.
145
00:06:49,242 --> 00:06:50,678
Dennis is a fine
Human being,
146
00:06:50,678 --> 00:06:53,914
And I hustled him out of here
Like he had the plague,
147
00:06:53,914 --> 00:06:57,551
All in an effort avoid
Your childish jibes.
148
00:06:57,551 --> 00:06:59,520
How will I ever
Make it up to him?
149
00:06:59,520 --> 00:07:02,790
Well, you could
Always offer
To set his hair.
150
00:07:04,057 --> 00:07:05,425
Fine, fine.
151
00:07:05,425 --> 00:07:06,994
Thank you all.
152
00:07:06,994 --> 00:07:09,763
Oh, come on!
You're overreacting.
153
00:07:09,763 --> 00:07:11,965
We were simply
Indulging in
A couple of yuks.
154
00:07:11,965 --> 00:07:13,100
Were we not, guys?
155
00:07:13,100 --> 00:07:15,903
Well, I can understand
Why you act like this,
156
00:07:15,903 --> 00:07:19,372
And sam--stooping to
Such puerile behavior.
157
00:07:19,372 --> 00:07:20,908
You're jealous.
158
00:07:20,908 --> 00:07:23,577
But I don't know why
Everyone else jumps in.
159
00:07:23,577 --> 00:07:26,714
Woody here was the only
One of you mature enough
160
00:07:26,714 --> 00:07:30,851
To refrain from jumping on
Your mudslinging bandwagon.
161
00:07:30,851 --> 00:07:33,053
Why should I,
Miss chambers?
162
00:07:33,053 --> 00:07:34,421
I like denise.
163
00:07:34,421 --> 00:07:35,523
That's dennis.
164
00:07:35,523 --> 00:07:36,857
I know!
165
00:07:39,893 --> 00:07:41,094
Whoo!
166
00:07:46,233 --> 00:07:48,068
Cliff: hey, normie.
167
00:07:50,704 --> 00:07:52,339
You feel like doing
168
00:07:52,339 --> 00:07:53,641
Something adventurous
Tonight?
169
00:07:53,641 --> 00:07:56,209
I'm already doing
That, cliffie.
170
00:07:56,209 --> 00:07:59,980
Vera is trying on
A new facial mask
This evening,
171
00:07:59,980 --> 00:08:03,584
And I kind of
Want to rush home
And watch it crack.
172
00:08:05,218 --> 00:08:06,419
All right.
173
00:08:06,419 --> 00:08:08,856
All right.
What did you
Have in mind?
174
00:08:08,856 --> 00:08:12,259
I heard from one of the guys
Down the junkmail room
175
00:08:12,259 --> 00:08:14,427
That there's a new act
176
00:08:14,427 --> 00:08:17,164
Down at the old
Wam bam room.
177
00:08:17,164 --> 00:08:19,099
Ooh, hot dog!
178
00:08:19,099 --> 00:08:21,268
Presenting the finest
In nudie entertainment.
179
00:08:21,268 --> 00:08:23,904
Come on, frasier. What
Do you say? Let's go.
180
00:08:23,904 --> 00:08:26,607
You're inviting me
Along to this evening
Of devilment?
181
00:08:26,607 --> 00:08:28,475
Sure. You got
A credit card,
Don't you?.
182
00:08:28,475 --> 00:08:30,243
Well...
183
00:08:30,243 --> 00:08:31,779
You know, I'm not so sure
184
00:08:31,779 --> 00:08:33,847
If it really fits in
With my image.
185
00:08:33,847 --> 00:08:36,650
A desperately lonely
Character on the make?
186
00:08:36,650 --> 00:08:38,652
Well, I guess I'm in.
187
00:08:38,652 --> 00:08:40,020
All right!
188
00:08:42,355 --> 00:08:44,692
[beeper beeps]
189
00:08:44,692 --> 00:08:47,695
Oh, sure! Just when
I'm about to have fun.
190
00:08:47,695 --> 00:08:49,563
That's mrs. Benedict.
191
00:08:49,563 --> 00:08:51,198
How did you
Know that?
192
00:08:51,198 --> 00:08:53,601
Because she's the
Person I'd least like
To hear from.
193
00:08:53,601 --> 00:08:55,268
Even her beep
Is whiny.
194
00:08:55,268 --> 00:08:56,770
Excuse me.
Just two seconds.
195
00:08:56,770 --> 00:08:58,606
Guys, carla, get your coats.
196
00:08:58,606 --> 00:08:59,940
You're coming over
To my place.
197
00:08:59,940 --> 00:09:02,209
Tonight, on the tube--
The magnificent seven.
198
00:09:02,209 --> 00:09:04,878
Cliffie, the wam bam room
Will always be there,
199
00:09:04,878 --> 00:09:06,980
But only tonight
Will the seven ride.
200
00:09:06,980 --> 00:09:09,583
Cliff: say no
More. Bronson,
Mcqueen, coburn.
201
00:09:09,583 --> 00:09:11,351
Don't think I ever
Saw that one.
202
00:09:11,351 --> 00:09:14,187
You're kidding.
Then tonight,
You become a man.
203
00:09:14,187 --> 00:09:15,355
Well, I'm off.
204
00:09:15,355 --> 00:09:16,757
Hey, change of
Plans, frasier.
205
00:09:16,757 --> 00:09:18,325
Magnificent seven,
206
00:09:18,325 --> 00:09:19,559
Sammy's tv,
Tonight.
207
00:09:19,559 --> 00:09:21,094
The seven? Great.
208
00:09:21,094 --> 00:09:24,665
I never miss
A horst buchholz film.
209
00:09:24,665 --> 00:09:27,334
Listen, I tell you what.
I'll catch up to you
210
00:09:27,334 --> 00:09:31,471
Just as soon as I talk
Mrs. Benedict out of her hamper.
211
00:09:31,471 --> 00:09:33,106
Do you guys
Do this a lot?
212
00:09:33,106 --> 00:09:35,743
Every time one of the
Classics is on tv,
213
00:09:35,743 --> 00:09:38,145
We all head over to sammy's,
Make some popcorn,
214
00:09:38,145 --> 00:09:39,880
And glue our eyeballs
To the set.
215
00:09:39,880 --> 00:09:43,717
I'm not ordinarily a fan
Of american westerns,
216
00:09:43,717 --> 00:09:46,453
But because the
Magnificent seven
Is a remake
217
00:09:46,453 --> 00:09:49,623
Of the far superior
And more complex
Japanese film,
218
00:09:49,623 --> 00:09:51,091
The seven samurai,
219
00:09:51,091 --> 00:09:53,426
A comparison
Will be interesting.
220
00:09:53,426 --> 00:09:54,795
We'll be sure to do that.
221
00:09:54,795 --> 00:09:56,997
You don't mind locking up,
Do you, sweetheart?
222
00:09:58,498 --> 00:10:01,001
Oh...Of course not.
223
00:10:03,637 --> 00:10:05,906
[whimpers]
224
00:10:07,708 --> 00:10:09,710
Carla: we didn't
Hear anything.
225
00:10:09,710 --> 00:10:12,545
Oh, no. I'm going to
Check this out.
226
00:10:12,545 --> 00:10:14,682
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
227
00:10:18,151 --> 00:10:21,354
I'm sorry. Do you want to
Come with us, sweetheart?
228
00:10:21,354 --> 00:10:22,455
No!
229
00:10:22,455 --> 00:10:25,558
I don't want
To ruin your fun.
230
00:10:25,558 --> 00:10:28,696
When I first walked
Into this place,
231
00:10:28,696 --> 00:10:30,664
I felt
Like an alien,
232
00:10:30,664 --> 00:10:32,199
And four years
Later,
233
00:10:32,199 --> 00:10:34,501
I still feel
Like an alien.
234
00:10:34,501 --> 00:10:37,671
Well, if
The antenna fits...
235
00:10:39,840 --> 00:10:41,441
Diane, wait
A second.
236
00:10:41,441 --> 00:10:43,476
I just want
To go home, sam.
237
00:10:43,476 --> 00:10:44,912
Well,
Maybe if you...
238
00:10:50,483 --> 00:10:52,352
I don't know, guys.
239
00:10:52,352 --> 00:10:56,156
I don't feel good about
The movie tonight.
240
00:10:56,156 --> 00:10:58,926
Nah.
Nah.
241
00:10:58,926 --> 00:11:04,164
[hums theme from
The magnificent seven]
242
00:11:04,164 --> 00:11:06,266
[sam hums theme]
243
00:11:06,266 --> 00:11:07,567
[cliff hums theme]
244
00:11:07,567 --> 00:11:09,737
[humming theme]
245
00:11:24,351 --> 00:11:27,020
[humming continues]
246
00:11:37,564 --> 00:11:40,801
[telephone rings]
247
00:11:40,801 --> 00:11:41,902
Cheers.
248
00:11:41,902 --> 00:11:45,272
Oh. Hi, diane.
249
00:11:45,272 --> 00:11:48,575
Why aren't you here?
Are you sick or something?
250
00:11:48,575 --> 00:11:50,944
Well, you sound
All stuffed up. I...
251
00:11:52,479 --> 00:11:54,314
Uh-huh. Well, um...
252
00:11:54,314 --> 00:11:56,416
I hope you feel better.
253
00:11:56,416 --> 00:11:58,618
Bye-bye.
254
00:11:58,618 --> 00:12:00,120
What's the matter
With her?
255
00:12:00,120 --> 00:12:02,122
She said she's
Got this allergy
256
00:12:02,122 --> 00:12:04,291
Where you weep
Uncontrollably.
257
00:12:05,926 --> 00:12:07,627
What do you think, guys?
258
00:12:07,627 --> 00:12:09,196
Do you think
We hurt her feelings
259
00:12:09,196 --> 00:12:10,630
A little bit too much
Last night?
260
00:12:10,630 --> 00:12:13,366
Maybe we ought
To do something to
Make it up to her,
261
00:12:13,366 --> 00:12:16,403
Like send her a
Bouquet of flowers.
262
00:12:16,403 --> 00:12:18,939
Oh, cliché city, huh?
263
00:12:18,939 --> 00:12:22,042
You know, whenever I
Break the heart
264
00:12:22,042 --> 00:12:24,044
Of a member
Of the gentler sex,
265
00:12:24,044 --> 00:12:27,981
I always send her
A nice box of dried figs.
266
00:12:30,050 --> 00:12:32,820
Figs won't do it.
267
00:12:32,820 --> 00:12:36,289
Let me see if I can
Explain this. Uh...
268
00:12:36,289 --> 00:12:39,759
Diane has always
Tried to take part
269
00:12:39,759 --> 00:12:41,328
In your activities.
270
00:12:41,328 --> 00:12:43,897
Why don't you
Return the favor
271
00:12:43,897 --> 00:12:48,535
By joining her in something
She finds entertaining?
272
00:12:48,535 --> 00:12:50,170
Oh, boy.
All right.
273
00:12:50,170 --> 00:12:54,674
What egghead torture do
We have to endure now?
274
00:12:54,674 --> 00:12:57,410
Well, uh...
How about the opera?
275
00:12:57,410 --> 00:12:59,479
Oh, man,
Come on! Jeez!
276
00:12:59,479 --> 00:13:03,616
It's not like we threw
Her down a flight
Of stairs! Come on!
277
00:13:03,616 --> 00:13:05,886
Tell you what.
Leave it to me.
278
00:13:05,886 --> 00:13:07,420
I'll make all
The arrangements,
279
00:13:07,420 --> 00:13:09,322
Right down to her
Favorite flowers.
280
00:13:09,322 --> 00:13:11,925
All you guys have to
Do is just show up.
281
00:13:14,261 --> 00:13:16,263
All right.
What do you say, guys?
282
00:13:16,263 --> 00:13:19,066
I mean, it's the
Least we could do.
283
00:13:19,066 --> 00:13:21,668
Huh? All right,
All right, all right.
284
00:13:21,668 --> 00:13:23,803
Do me a favor.
Just pick an opera
285
00:13:23,803 --> 00:13:27,474
Where it doesn't
Sound like somebody
Backing over a cat.
286
00:13:27,474 --> 00:13:28,775
Please.
287
00:13:28,775 --> 00:13:30,310
You're in luck.
288
00:13:30,310 --> 00:13:33,080
They're playing
Diane's favorite
Tomorrow night--
289
00:13:33,080 --> 00:13:35,949
Lucia di lammermoor
By donizetti.
290
00:13:35,949 --> 00:13:37,951
Yeah? Well,
Count me out.
291
00:13:37,951 --> 00:13:40,020
Every time we had
A family gathering,
292
00:13:40,020 --> 00:13:42,222
They always tried to get me
Interested in opera.
293
00:13:42,222 --> 00:13:44,024
I just couldn't stand it.
294
00:13:44,024 --> 00:13:46,359
It's just a bunch
Of fat, homely people
295
00:13:46,359 --> 00:13:50,563
Screeching and trying
To stab each other.
296
00:13:50,563 --> 00:13:52,565
Well, carla, you know,
297
00:13:52,565 --> 00:13:54,367
Not all operas
Are like that.
298
00:13:54,367 --> 00:13:57,304
I was talking about
The family gathering.
299
00:14:13,987 --> 00:14:15,822
Check it out, boys.
300
00:14:15,822 --> 00:14:19,259
Better than the skyview
Seats at fenway.
301
00:14:19,259 --> 00:14:21,794
Ooh, huh?
Look at these chairs.
302
00:14:21,794 --> 00:14:24,264
They're not even
Bolted down.
303
00:14:24,264 --> 00:14:26,399
Hey, that's class
For you.
304
00:14:26,399 --> 00:14:29,269
Boy, you got to
Really hand it to
Frasier, don't you?
305
00:14:29,269 --> 00:14:31,939
He really knows what
Melts diane's butter.
306
00:14:31,939 --> 00:14:33,273
Look at this. Wow.
307
00:14:33,273 --> 00:14:35,342
All right. If we stick
Together tonight,
308
00:14:35,342 --> 00:14:37,410
I think we won't have
Any casualties.
309
00:14:37,410 --> 00:14:39,679
As long as you remember
Your job, woody.
310
00:14:39,679 --> 00:14:43,350
Anybody starts
Falling asleep,
Give him a nudge.
311
00:14:43,350 --> 00:14:45,352
Hey, don't worry,
Mr. Clavin.
312
00:14:45,352 --> 00:14:47,420
There's no way I'm
Going to fall asleep.
313
00:14:47,420 --> 00:14:50,223
I had a four-hour nap
This afternoon,
314
00:14:50,223 --> 00:14:52,125
Drank 12 cups
Of coffee,
315
00:14:52,125 --> 00:14:54,527
And I'm wearing
Extra-tight shoes.
316
00:14:54,527 --> 00:14:56,196
So where's
Diane?
317
00:14:56,196 --> 00:14:59,266
She's powdering her nose.
She started to cry again.
318
00:14:59,266 --> 00:15:01,168
What a woman, huh?
Do you believe that?
319
00:15:01,168 --> 00:15:04,304
She started to cry when
We told her we were going
To take her to the opera,
320
00:15:04,304 --> 00:15:07,040
She cried when she
Saw us in our tuxes,
321
00:15:07,040 --> 00:15:08,808
And she cried when
She saw the limo.
322
00:15:08,808 --> 00:15:10,377
She's got it
Under control, though.
323
00:15:10,377 --> 00:15:12,379
She said she won't
Do it anymore.
324
00:15:12,379 --> 00:15:15,048
Diane: no, thank you.
I'll seat myself.
325
00:15:17,985 --> 00:15:20,653
Oh, this is
The best box!
326
00:15:20,653 --> 00:15:21,821
Now, you promised.
327
00:15:21,821 --> 00:15:23,123
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
328
00:15:23,123 --> 00:15:24,791
Won't happen again.
329
00:15:24,791 --> 00:15:26,693
Uh, madam,
Your seat.
330
00:15:26,693 --> 00:15:27,894
Oh!
331
00:15:27,894 --> 00:15:29,529
Hold on. Yeah.
That's good.
332
00:15:31,431 --> 00:15:33,033
Gentlemen.
333
00:15:38,371 --> 00:15:41,574
Ah! What a
Glorious night.
334
00:15:41,574 --> 00:15:43,376
Somebody pinch me.
335
00:15:43,376 --> 00:15:45,512
That's just an
Expression, cliff.
336
00:15:48,481 --> 00:15:50,717
On second thought,
Don't pinch me.
337
00:15:50,717 --> 00:15:55,388
If this is a dream,
I do not want to awaken.
338
00:15:55,388 --> 00:15:58,391
Listen, I know that you're
All novices to the opera,
339
00:15:58,391 --> 00:16:00,593
So I'd like to give you
A little background.
340
00:16:00,593 --> 00:16:03,830
Tonight's performance
Is in italian.
341
00:16:03,830 --> 00:16:05,832
I'm sure that
You will find it
342
00:16:05,832 --> 00:16:08,268
Both enlightening
And entertaining.
343
00:16:08,268 --> 00:16:10,570
By the way, does anyone
Need opera glasses?
344
00:16:10,570 --> 00:16:14,974
No. I brought
A pair of my own,
There, diane.
345
00:16:23,016 --> 00:16:26,453
Cliffie, think those are
Powerful enough, pal?
346
00:16:26,453 --> 00:16:28,521
You better
Believe it, norm.
347
00:16:28,521 --> 00:16:32,392
Get a load of the warheads
On that cellist.
348
00:16:32,392 --> 00:16:35,362
No, hey, hey, hey.
Don't, don't.
349
00:16:35,362 --> 00:16:36,496
So...
350
00:16:36,496 --> 00:16:39,432
This charming piece
Is in three acts.
351
00:16:39,432 --> 00:16:44,071
It begins with edgardo
Leaving for france
352
00:16:44,071 --> 00:16:47,340
To renew his vow
Of love for lucia.
353
00:16:47,340 --> 00:16:52,379
Though both houses
Have maintained
A feud for years...
354
00:16:53,713 --> 00:16:57,317
Enrico, lucia's brother,
Arranges a marriage
355
00:16:57,317 --> 00:16:59,819
Between his friend
Arturo and lucia
356
00:16:59,819 --> 00:17:02,021
By tricking her
Into believing
357
00:17:02,021 --> 00:17:04,191
That edgardo
Has been untrue.
358
00:17:04,191 --> 00:17:05,525
Mmm. Mm-hmm.
359
00:17:07,026 --> 00:17:09,762
But let's watch.
360
00:17:09,762 --> 00:17:11,564
[applause]
361
00:17:11,564 --> 00:17:13,066
Maestro.
362
00:17:15,335 --> 00:17:17,104
[beer can
Opens]
363
00:17:26,679 --> 00:17:29,048
[music starts]
364
00:17:59,846 --> 00:18:01,848
[opera finale]
365
00:18:01,848 --> 00:18:03,716
[applause]
366
00:18:05,318 --> 00:18:07,620
Wasn't that lovely?
367
00:18:16,396 --> 00:18:18,665
Sam: good night.
Good night.
368
00:18:18,665 --> 00:18:21,067
So, how did it go?
369
00:18:21,067 --> 00:18:23,836
I had a problem with
One of customers.
370
00:18:23,836 --> 00:18:24,971
Oh!
Ooh!
371
00:18:24,971 --> 00:18:27,274
He refused to keep
His hands on me.
372
00:18:29,942 --> 00:18:32,011
Go home.
I'll finish up here.
373
00:18:32,011 --> 00:18:33,513
Thanks.
Yeah.
374
00:18:33,513 --> 00:18:37,884
Diane, you probably noticed
I wasn't there tonight.
375
00:18:37,884 --> 00:18:39,319
Oh...
376
00:18:39,319 --> 00:18:41,554
Yes.
Thank you, carla.
377
00:18:43,690 --> 00:18:45,858
That was a really
Sweet gesture.
378
00:18:45,858 --> 00:18:47,394
You're welcome.
379
00:18:48,395 --> 00:18:50,730
May I offer you
A cognac?
380
00:18:50,730 --> 00:18:51,864
Yes.
381
00:18:51,864 --> 00:18:53,800
That would be lovely.
382
00:18:55,568 --> 00:18:58,671
Thank you again, sam,
For your thoughtfulness.
383
00:18:58,671 --> 00:19:01,174
It may not seem
Like much to you,
384
00:19:01,174 --> 00:19:03,543
But it really meant
A lot to me.
385
00:19:03,543 --> 00:19:07,347
No, no. It seemed like
Quite a bit to us, too.
386
00:19:09,482 --> 00:19:14,153
Oh...This evening
Was so special,
So wonderful to me,
387
00:19:14,153 --> 00:19:15,922
And it was
All your doing.
388
00:19:15,922 --> 00:19:20,193
Well, there were some
Other people involved.
389
00:19:20,193 --> 00:19:22,362
Oh, no.
You're their leader.
390
00:19:22,362 --> 00:19:24,597
They do nothing
Without you.
391
00:19:24,597 --> 00:19:25,732
Well...
392
00:19:25,732 --> 00:19:27,534
But so gallant.
393
00:19:27,534 --> 00:19:28,468
Thank you.
394
00:19:28,468 --> 00:19:30,770
I can't help helping,
I guess.
395
00:19:33,806 --> 00:19:36,042
Every detail was
So well thought out,
396
00:19:36,042 --> 00:19:38,110
Right down to your
Choice of opera.
397
00:19:38,110 --> 00:19:41,714
Oh, well, I knew
That lucy du-du-du
Was your favorite.
398
00:19:44,417 --> 00:19:46,653
It was perfect.
399
00:19:46,653 --> 00:19:48,755
You hit all the
Right chords.
400
00:19:48,755 --> 00:19:52,859
Well, I think I know you
Pretty well by now.
401
00:19:52,859 --> 00:19:55,862
Sam, I confess, I...
Underestimated you.
402
00:19:55,862 --> 00:19:58,931
I had not idea you
Thought so much about me
403
00:19:58,931 --> 00:20:00,700
In ways other
Than sexual.
404
00:20:00,700 --> 00:20:05,738
Unfortunately,
I can't possibly do
That at the moment.
405
00:20:05,738 --> 00:20:07,574
Oh, sam.
406
00:20:10,443 --> 00:20:13,413
You moved me
Very deeply tonight.
407
00:20:13,413 --> 00:20:18,818
Well, it moves me deeply
To move you deeply.
408
00:20:21,554 --> 00:20:24,557
Speaking of depths,
Would I be sinking to one
409
00:20:24,557 --> 00:20:27,226
If I were to suggest that
We carry this conversation
410
00:20:27,226 --> 00:20:29,128
Back to my place?
411
00:20:29,128 --> 00:20:31,364
Sam, my god.
412
00:20:31,364 --> 00:20:33,366
Oh, dear. What?
413
00:20:35,201 --> 00:20:37,604
I wasn't expecting this.
414
00:20:37,604 --> 00:20:41,040
I'm experiencing
Emotions I haven't felt
For so long.
415
00:20:41,040 --> 00:20:43,476
My heart's saying yes.
My mind's saying no.
416
00:20:43,476 --> 00:20:47,814
Why don't you let some
Other part of your body
Break the tie for you?
417
00:20:49,516 --> 00:20:50,683
Huh?
418
00:20:50,683 --> 00:20:52,952
I think
I'd better go.
419
00:20:52,952 --> 00:20:54,321
Aw...
420
00:20:54,321 --> 00:20:56,323
Oh, my purse.
421
00:20:57,924 --> 00:20:59,258
Oh, boy.
422
00:21:05,632 --> 00:21:07,266
Oh, sam,
I can't fight it.
423
00:21:07,266 --> 00:21:11,037
Everything tonight
Has been leading me
Right into your arms.
424
00:21:11,037 --> 00:21:13,205
Let me get this clear here.
425
00:21:13,205 --> 00:21:14,907
You're saying
That we--
426
00:21:14,907 --> 00:21:18,210
We always get into
So much trouble
When we talk.
427
00:21:18,210 --> 00:21:19,546
Mm.
428
00:21:21,348 --> 00:21:23,483
Let's not.
429
00:21:23,483 --> 00:21:25,752
Let's...Just do.
430
00:21:25,752 --> 00:21:27,320
Oh...
431
00:21:27,320 --> 00:21:29,956
From now on,
No words.
432
00:21:29,956 --> 00:21:31,758
I can't believe this.
433
00:21:31,758 --> 00:21:34,527
This is like
A dream I had once.
434
00:21:34,527 --> 00:21:36,295
Oh, wait a minute.
435
00:21:36,295 --> 00:21:38,531
This was good
Back here.
436
00:21:41,868 --> 00:21:46,172
This is becoming
The most perfect evening
437
00:21:46,172 --> 00:21:48,575
We've ever had together.
438
00:21:50,977 --> 00:21:53,312
Ah...Boy.
439
00:21:57,183 --> 00:21:58,217
Sam?
440
00:21:58,217 --> 00:21:59,752
Mmm.
441
00:21:59,752 --> 00:22:01,020
What is it?
442
00:22:01,020 --> 00:22:04,657
I...I can't believe
I'm about to say this.
443
00:22:04,657 --> 00:22:08,728
Uh, I got to be
Honest with you.
444
00:22:08,728 --> 00:22:11,330
Frasier planned
The whole evening.
445
00:22:11,330 --> 00:22:13,800
I had nothing
To do with it.
446
00:22:15,802 --> 00:22:18,371
What do you
Think about that?
447
00:22:21,874 --> 00:22:23,543
Yeah.
448
00:22:24,711 --> 00:22:26,913
You're saying this
To me now
449
00:22:26,913 --> 00:22:30,783
Is one of the most
Wonderful things
You have ever done.
450
00:22:30,783 --> 00:22:32,685
Oh, boy!
451
00:22:32,685 --> 00:22:35,354
Oh! Ha!
452
00:22:37,624 --> 00:22:41,761
I'm even more attracted
To you now than before.
453
00:22:41,761 --> 00:22:45,231
Oh, that's great.
That's great. Let's go.
454
00:22:45,231 --> 00:22:46,566
Sam, wait.
455
00:22:46,566 --> 00:22:48,568
No, no, don't say wait.
Don't say wait.
456
00:22:48,568 --> 00:22:50,670
We can't possibly
Have sex tonight.
457
00:22:50,670 --> 00:22:52,905
Sure we can.
Sure we can.
458
00:22:52,905 --> 00:22:56,476
No. Don't you realize
What you did?
459
00:22:56,476 --> 00:22:59,245
You insisted on
Being honest to me,
460
00:22:59,245 --> 00:23:01,147
Respecting me
As a person,
461
00:23:01,147 --> 00:23:02,749
Even though it meant
462
00:23:02,749 --> 00:23:05,952
Risking the loss
Of a night of passion.
463
00:23:05,952 --> 00:23:10,056
Well, that kind of stuff
Should be rewarded,
Don't you think?
464
00:23:13,125 --> 00:23:14,627
Sam, no.
465
00:23:14,627 --> 00:23:18,431
For a change tonight,
You had the cooler head,
466
00:23:18,431 --> 00:23:19,966
And you were right
To stop me.
467
00:23:19,966 --> 00:23:24,336
We are developing a very
Special relationship,
468
00:23:24,336 --> 00:23:27,239
And it would be
Wrong to jeopardize it
469
00:23:27,239 --> 00:23:28,908
By having sex.
470
00:23:28,908 --> 00:23:31,678
No. I want to
Jeopardize it with sex.
471
00:23:31,678 --> 00:23:33,513
It would be a test.
472
00:23:33,513 --> 00:23:35,648
Sam. Sam,
You're regressing.
473
00:23:35,648 --> 00:23:36,949
You're backsliding.
474
00:23:36,949 --> 00:23:39,986
No--
We're not ready yet.
475
00:23:39,986 --> 00:23:42,054
Well...All right.
476
00:23:42,054 --> 00:23:44,557
Do you have an estimate
On when we might be ready?
477
00:23:44,557 --> 00:23:46,559
I mean, is it minutes
Here? Come on.
478
00:23:46,559 --> 00:23:48,394
Sam, this was a real
Breakthrough for us.
479
00:23:48,394 --> 00:23:52,098
I think it's very
Important for each
Of us to be alone.
480
00:23:52,098 --> 00:23:54,467
No, I agree. As soon
As we're done,
481
00:23:54,467 --> 00:23:56,435
I'll leave,
I promise.
482
00:23:58,404 --> 00:24:00,106
Good night, sam.
483
00:24:00,106 --> 00:24:02,942
No, no, wait.
Here!
484
00:24:02,942 --> 00:24:04,877
Oh, no.
485
00:24:04,877 --> 00:24:06,412
No.
486
00:24:06,412 --> 00:24:08,881
Aw, jeez...
34396