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1
00:00:03,571 --> 00:00:06,074
Cheers is filmed
Before a live studio audience.
2
00:00:06,074 --> 00:00:09,077
I got it. Yeah, thank you.
3
00:00:09,077 --> 00:00:10,944
Table ready upstairs
At melville's
4
00:00:10,944 --> 00:00:12,480
For the anderson party.
5
00:00:12,480 --> 00:00:16,117
Table ready
For the anderson party!
6
00:00:16,117 --> 00:00:17,518
Your name
Is anderson?
7
00:00:17,518 --> 00:00:18,586
Yeah.
8
00:00:18,586 --> 00:00:21,089
I guess there must be
Two anderson parties.
9
00:00:21,089 --> 00:00:22,890
What's the first name?
10
00:00:22,890 --> 00:00:24,525
Ernie, but they
Call me coach.
11
00:00:24,525 --> 00:00:28,196
Coach, there are
Two anderson
Parties here.
12
00:00:28,196 --> 00:00:29,630
Would you
Call upstairs
And find out
13
00:00:29,630 --> 00:00:32,500
Which anderson party
Gets the table.
14
00:00:32,500 --> 00:00:34,635
Good idea.
15
00:00:34,635 --> 00:00:37,105
Nick, we got a little
Problem down here.
16
00:00:37,105 --> 00:00:39,006
There are two
Anderson parties.
17
00:00:39,006 --> 00:00:41,109
Now, which one is it?
18
00:00:41,109 --> 00:00:42,710
Oh, thanks, nick. Thanks.
19
00:00:42,710 --> 00:00:44,945
I got it.
20
00:00:44,945 --> 00:00:47,181
I'm sorry.
I was wrong.
21
00:00:47,181 --> 00:00:49,183
It's not
For the andersons.
22
00:00:49,183 --> 00:00:51,319
It's for
The blubberbutts.
23
00:00:53,154 --> 00:00:54,888
Table ready
For the blubberbutts!
24
00:00:54,888 --> 00:00:57,691
Table ready
For the blubberbutts!
25
00:01:04,398 --> 00:01:07,034
* making the way
In the world today *
26
00:01:07,034 --> 00:01:09,737
* takes everything you've got *
27
00:01:09,737 --> 00:01:12,840
* taking a break
From all your worries *
28
00:01:12,840 --> 00:01:16,110
* sure would help a lot *
29
00:01:16,110 --> 00:01:19,347
* wouldn't you like
To get away *
30
00:01:21,949 --> 00:01:24,017
* sometimes
You want to go *
31
00:01:24,017 --> 00:01:27,521
* where everybody
Knows your name *
32
00:01:29,323 --> 00:01:32,826
* and they're always
Glad you came *
33
00:01:34,162 --> 00:01:36,430
* you want to be
Where you can see *
34
00:01:36,430 --> 00:01:39,099
* our troubles
Are all the same *
35
00:01:39,099 --> 00:01:40,401
* you want to be *
36
00:01:40,401 --> 00:01:44,205
* where everybody knows
Your name *
37
00:01:44,205 --> 00:01:47,040
* you want to go
Where people know *
38
00:01:47,040 --> 00:01:49,377
* people are all the same *
39
00:01:49,377 --> 00:01:53,847
* you want to go where everybody
Knows your name *
40
00:02:08,061 --> 00:02:11,098
Dylan thomas,
Delmore schwartz,
41
00:02:11,098 --> 00:02:12,500
Fitzgerald, faulkner--
42
00:02:12,500 --> 00:02:14,402
They all virtually
Drank themselves to death.
43
00:02:14,402 --> 00:02:17,104
Gone before their time.
44
00:02:17,104 --> 00:02:20,808
So, can I get you
Another round?
45
00:02:20,808 --> 00:02:21,842
Oh, ohh.
46
00:02:21,842 --> 00:02:25,279
Diane's mouth has
Sprung a leak again.
47
00:02:25,279 --> 00:02:26,480
Excuse me.
48
00:02:26,480 --> 00:02:27,681
Yeah.
49
00:02:27,681 --> 00:02:29,049
We have to leave.
Could we get our
Waitress now?
50
00:02:29,049 --> 00:02:30,618
Sure.
51
00:02:30,618 --> 00:02:32,286
Diane:
Here's my theory
52
00:02:32,286 --> 00:02:34,455
On the relationship
Between alcohol and genius.
53
00:02:34,455 --> 00:02:36,224
Writing is
A very lonely profession--oh!
54
00:02:36,224 --> 00:02:37,825
Excuse me a moment.
55
00:02:37,825 --> 00:02:41,662
Let me go. Carla.
Carla, please. Please.
56
00:02:41,662 --> 00:02:42,863
Carla.
57
00:02:42,863 --> 00:02:44,565
Here you go.
58
00:02:45,833 --> 00:02:47,301
Could we
Get our check?
59
00:02:47,301 --> 00:02:49,770
Certainly.
60
00:02:49,770 --> 00:02:53,974
Carl, I told you before--
Keep your hands off diane.
61
00:02:53,974 --> 00:02:56,410
I will if you will.
62
00:02:57,978 --> 00:03:00,147
Carla...
63
00:03:00,147 --> 00:03:02,516
I have two things
To say to you.
64
00:03:02,516 --> 00:03:04,652
First, don't ever do
Anything like that
To me again
65
00:03:04,652 --> 00:03:07,488
Or you will regret it
For the rest of your
Miserable little life,
66
00:03:07,488 --> 00:03:12,293
And the second,
Would this a bad time
To ask a favor?
67
00:03:12,293 --> 00:03:15,128
For you, there's
No good time.
68
00:03:15,128 --> 00:03:16,330
I would greatly
Appreciate it
69
00:03:16,330 --> 00:03:18,399
If you would
Switch schedules
With me
70
00:03:18,399 --> 00:03:21,469
So that I could have
Next tuesday off.
71
00:03:21,469 --> 00:03:22,570
No!
72
00:03:22,570 --> 00:03:24,705
Oh, carla.
73
00:03:24,705 --> 00:03:28,542
Oriana fallaci
Is giving a speech
At harvard.
74
00:03:28,542 --> 00:03:30,344
Look, come on,
Please.
75
00:03:30,344 --> 00:03:32,313
You've got
To change with me.
76
00:03:32,313 --> 00:03:34,214
I don't have
To do nothing.
77
00:03:34,214 --> 00:03:35,916
Before I do a favor
For you,
78
00:03:35,916 --> 00:03:40,020
I would rather
Be dragged around town
By my tongue.
79
00:03:40,020 --> 00:03:43,324
Well, since you don't
Feel strongly about it,
80
00:03:43,324 --> 00:03:46,126
Maybe sam would like
To decide for us.
81
00:03:46,126 --> 00:03:47,695
Ha!
I'd rather flip a coin.
82
00:03:47,695 --> 00:03:50,398
At least that way
I'd have a chance.
83
00:03:50,398 --> 00:03:52,199
What is that mean
Supposed to mean,
Please?
84
00:03:52,199 --> 00:03:56,203
It means that ever since
You two started...
85
00:03:56,203 --> 00:03:58,005
You know.
86
00:03:58,005 --> 00:04:01,208
She gets away with things
The rest of us wouldn't.
87
00:04:01,208 --> 00:04:02,710
I beg your pardon.
88
00:04:02,710 --> 00:04:04,545
Carla,
Maybe you're right.
89
00:04:04,545 --> 00:04:06,547
Maybe I have been
Too easy on her.
90
00:04:06,547 --> 00:04:08,316
I'll take her
In the back
91
00:04:08,316 --> 00:04:11,419
And teach her
Some obedience.
92
00:04:16,690 --> 00:04:19,793
I got no feelings
About what you 2
Do in private,
93
00:04:19,793 --> 00:04:24,732
No matter how
Disgusting, sickening,
And putrid it is.
94
00:04:24,732 --> 00:04:26,367
I just don't think
The rest of us
95
00:04:26,367 --> 00:04:27,868
Should
Suffer for it.
96
00:04:27,868 --> 00:04:30,838
Carla, all I asked you to do
Was switch nights off with me,
97
00:04:30,838 --> 00:04:33,807
And you turn it into
A verbal lynching.
98
00:04:33,807 --> 00:04:36,610
What's the big deal
Changing one night with her?
99
00:04:36,610 --> 00:04:38,245
There you go again
Taking her side.
100
00:04:38,245 --> 00:04:39,947
Huh, huh?
101
00:04:41,615 --> 00:04:44,251
Ok. All right,
All right.
102
00:04:44,251 --> 00:04:45,953
Diane, work tuesday night,
103
00:04:45,953 --> 00:04:48,255
And let's just forget
This whole thing, will you?
104
00:04:48,255 --> 00:04:51,592
Sam, you obviously
Don't realize
105
00:04:51,592 --> 00:04:54,528
How important
This speech is to me.
106
00:04:55,796 --> 00:04:57,865
It's only
One night, carla.
107
00:04:59,232 --> 00:05:00,734
Hey, diane, I think--
108
00:05:03,170 --> 00:05:04,271
Carla, come on--
109
00:05:04,271 --> 00:05:07,174
Does anyone want
To buy a bar?
110
00:05:07,174 --> 00:05:11,078
All right, sam,
Relax. It's not fair
To put you through this.
111
00:05:11,078 --> 00:05:15,015
Carla, I've changed my mind,
You don't have to switch
With me.
112
00:05:15,015 --> 00:05:16,016
Good, good.
113
00:05:16,016 --> 00:05:17,017
Sam: ok?
114
00:05:17,017 --> 00:05:18,118
I've just come
115
00:05:18,118 --> 00:05:19,887
To a very important
Decision.
116
00:05:19,887 --> 00:05:21,722
Well, good for you.
117
00:05:23,123 --> 00:05:24,792
Evening, everybody.
118
00:05:24,792 --> 00:05:25,826
Norm!
Norm!
119
00:05:25,826 --> 00:05:27,127
Norman.
120
00:05:27,127 --> 00:05:28,696
Would you like
A beer, norm?
121
00:05:28,696 --> 00:05:32,466
Let's see something
In a size 54, sudsy.
122
00:05:32,466 --> 00:05:34,802
So how's life
Treating you there, norm?
123
00:05:34,802 --> 00:05:36,303
The same.
124
00:05:36,303 --> 00:05:38,872
Oh, that's
Too bad, norm.
125
00:05:38,872 --> 00:05:40,207
If not worse.
126
00:05:40,207 --> 00:05:41,642
What's wrong, normie?
127
00:05:41,642 --> 00:05:44,445
Nothing. A little
Personal problem.
128
00:05:44,445 --> 00:05:46,514
If it's anything
You want to talk about...
129
00:05:46,514 --> 00:05:47,948
No. Thought I'd kind
Of sit here
130
00:05:47,948 --> 00:05:50,117
And let it gnaw at
My gut for a while.
131
00:05:50,117 --> 00:05:53,487
Now, normie, come on.
You're among friends here.
132
00:05:53,487 --> 00:05:55,489
If you can't talk to us,
Who can you talk to?
133
00:05:55,489 --> 00:05:56,557
Yeah.
That's right.
134
00:05:56,557 --> 00:05:59,159
Not vera,
That's for sure.
135
00:05:59,159 --> 00:06:01,361
She and I
Have split.
136
00:06:01,361 --> 00:06:02,696
Oh, I'm sorry, man.
137
00:06:02,696 --> 00:06:04,898
What happened, norm?
What caused it?
138
00:06:04,898 --> 00:06:07,835
Well, she said
We no longer communicate,
139
00:06:07,835 --> 00:06:09,703
That I never listen
To her...
140
00:06:09,703 --> 00:06:13,273
A bunch of other stuff.
Yak yak yak.
141
00:06:13,273 --> 00:06:15,676
Well, cheer up, norm.
142
00:06:15,676 --> 00:06:17,678
Maybe this'll be good
For you somehow.
Yeah?
143
00:06:17,678 --> 00:06:19,847
Yeah. Absolutely.
Look at it this way.
144
00:06:19,847 --> 00:06:22,683
You're a free man
Now, norm.
145
00:06:22,683 --> 00:06:25,352
A carefree
Bachelor, huh?
146
00:06:25,352 --> 00:06:27,087
Yeah,
I do have a pad now.
147
00:06:27,087 --> 00:06:28,489
Hey, where is it?
148
00:06:28,489 --> 00:06:29,523
You know that big
Beautiful building
149
00:06:29,523 --> 00:06:30,591
Down by
The waterfront?
150
00:06:30,591 --> 00:06:32,025
Holy mackerel!
151
00:06:32,025 --> 00:06:32,993
Take a left there,
152
00:06:32,993 --> 00:06:34,495
You drive for about
A half an hour.
153
00:06:34,495 --> 00:06:36,163
Don't come at night.
154
00:06:36,163 --> 00:06:38,231
No, I think this
Is gonna be a whole
New way of life for you.
155
00:06:38,231 --> 00:06:41,435
You just got to get up
And around a little bit,
You know?
156
00:06:41,435 --> 00:06:43,136
Aw, I don't know.
157
00:06:43,136 --> 00:06:45,205
Come on, man,
Come on.
158
00:06:45,205 --> 00:06:47,007
What are you waiting for?
159
00:06:47,007 --> 00:06:48,842
All right, all right.
160
00:06:48,842 --> 00:06:51,144
All right,
I'm going to do it.
161
00:06:51,144 --> 00:06:53,180
Norman.
Norman.
162
00:06:53,180 --> 00:06:55,549
Norman.
Norman.
163
00:06:55,549 --> 00:06:57,217
Norman.
Norman.
164
00:06:57,217 --> 00:06:59,052
Stand back.
165
00:06:59,052 --> 00:07:00,954
I'm on the prowl.
166
00:07:10,363 --> 00:07:12,566
Slow up.
167
00:07:14,401 --> 00:07:16,704
Aw, come on, man.
168
00:07:22,075 --> 00:07:25,479
That was awfully quick,
There, norm.
169
00:07:25,479 --> 00:07:27,147
They know where
To find me.
170
00:07:29,282 --> 00:07:30,484
Sam.
Yeah?
171
00:07:30,484 --> 00:07:31,485
Read this.
172
00:07:31,485 --> 00:07:32,486
What is it?
173
00:07:32,486 --> 00:07:33,487
My resignation.
174
00:07:33,487 --> 00:07:34,488
Your what?
175
00:07:34,488 --> 00:07:35,989
Read it, read it.
176
00:07:37,357 --> 00:07:39,059
"Dear sam..."
177
00:07:40,494 --> 00:07:41,762
"Although my tenure here
178
00:07:41,762 --> 00:07:44,498
"Has been one of value
And enlightenment,
179
00:07:44,498 --> 00:07:45,933
Still..."
180
00:07:45,933 --> 00:07:49,069
Il faut cultiver
Notre jardin.
181
00:07:50,604 --> 00:07:55,643
Come on. First of all,
Nobody resigns from a bar,
182
00:07:55,643 --> 00:07:58,746
And second of all,
Nobody resigns in latin.
183
00:08:01,148 --> 00:08:02,683
It's french, sammy.
184
00:08:02,683 --> 00:08:04,217
What does it mean?
185
00:08:04,217 --> 00:08:06,587
Well, because of
The idiomatic peculiarities,
186
00:08:06,587 --> 00:08:09,623
It can't really be
Translated into english.
187
00:08:09,623 --> 00:08:13,961
"One must cultivate
One's own garden."
188
00:08:13,961 --> 00:08:16,697
Oh, well, well, diane,
You took some liberties
189
00:08:16,697 --> 00:08:20,668
With the derogatory tense
There, but...
190
00:08:20,668 --> 00:08:23,470
I think we'll let it
Slide this time, huh?
191
00:08:23,470 --> 00:08:26,073
What the hell
Is this about?
192
00:08:26,073 --> 00:08:29,209
I mean,
Just because I didn't take
Your side against carla?
193
00:08:29,209 --> 00:08:30,644
No, no, sam.
194
00:08:30,644 --> 00:08:32,880
The problem
With carla is
Only a symptom.
195
00:08:32,880 --> 00:08:36,349
You see,
It's abundantly
Clear to me
196
00:08:36,349 --> 00:08:37,818
That our working
Together
197
00:08:37,818 --> 00:08:39,452
Is making our
Lives miserable,
198
00:08:39,452 --> 00:08:41,589
And it can only
Get worse.
199
00:08:41,589 --> 00:08:43,223
Diane, you just can't leave
Like that.
200
00:08:43,223 --> 00:08:45,025
I mean, we should have
A party, you know?
201
00:08:45,025 --> 00:08:48,428
Some booze, a lot of pretzels,
Some munchies,
202
00:08:48,428 --> 00:08:50,463
And get a lot
Of people together.
203
00:08:50,463 --> 00:08:53,333
Coach, you mean
Kind of like this?
204
00:08:53,333 --> 00:08:57,137
Well, I guess that's good-bye.
205
00:08:59,206 --> 00:09:01,141
Sam, come on, you
Don't need me tonight.
206
00:09:01,141 --> 00:09:03,510
I want to go home
And start planning.
207
00:09:03,510 --> 00:09:05,012
I--I--
208
00:09:05,012 --> 00:09:06,680
Carla, what's
The matter, sweetheart?
209
00:09:06,680 --> 00:09:08,081
Are you all right?
210
00:09:09,516 --> 00:09:11,885
Don't you see?
211
00:09:11,885 --> 00:09:14,688
My life
Hasn't exactly been
A bag of roses,
212
00:09:14,688 --> 00:09:17,524
You know.
213
00:09:17,524 --> 00:09:20,193
I mean, my old man
Used to beat me.
214
00:09:20,193 --> 00:09:23,931
I spent
Half my childhood
In reform school.
215
00:09:23,931 --> 00:09:26,099
My husband
Was a rat.
216
00:09:26,099 --> 00:09:29,502
He left me with
Four hungry mouths
To feed.
217
00:09:29,502 --> 00:09:34,608
But this makes up
For all that.
218
00:09:37,010 --> 00:09:39,847
I am the happiest
Woman alive.
219
00:09:41,048 --> 00:09:43,316
I'm sorry. I think
This is a mistake.
220
00:09:43,316 --> 00:09:46,519
I mean, it's a
Tough town out there.
Norm, am I right?
221
00:09:46,519 --> 00:09:47,755
Most employers
Wouldn't spit on you
222
00:09:47,755 --> 00:09:50,891
If your hair
Was on fire.
223
00:09:50,891 --> 00:09:53,393
Oh, but you'll
Make it, kid.
224
00:09:53,393 --> 00:09:54,461
I know you will.
225
00:09:54,461 --> 00:09:56,063
You've got moxie.
226
00:09:56,063 --> 00:10:00,400
I know,
You all think I'm nothing
But a hothouse orchid,
227
00:10:00,400 --> 00:10:01,601
Unequipped to survive
228
00:10:01,601 --> 00:10:03,937
In anything but
A rarefied atmosphere.
229
00:10:03,937 --> 00:10:07,340
Well, I'll have you know
There's weed in me.
230
00:10:09,442 --> 00:10:10,744
What a farewell speech.
231
00:10:10,744 --> 00:10:12,212
Went on exactly
The right length.
232
00:10:12,212 --> 00:10:16,016
Any more would have been
Too much of a good thing.
233
00:10:16,016 --> 00:10:19,820
Hey, you're really
Going to do this,
Aren't you?
234
00:10:19,820 --> 00:10:24,191
Sam, I'm doing this
For us.
235
00:10:24,191 --> 00:10:25,325
Really?
236
00:10:25,325 --> 00:10:28,195
Yes. Now, don't you want
To spend your nights
237
00:10:28,195 --> 00:10:34,001
With a woman who's
Fulfilled, independent,
Self-actualized?
238
00:10:34,001 --> 00:10:36,904
Well, I suppose
It's worth a shot.
You got her number?
239
00:10:54,788 --> 00:10:56,456
Hello, everyone.
240
00:10:56,456 --> 00:10:57,457
Oh, hi, diane.
241
00:10:57,457 --> 00:10:58,759
Hi, diane.
242
00:10:58,759 --> 00:11:01,361
I've wonderful news.
I've got a job!
243
00:11:01,361 --> 00:11:04,131
Great!
Write us about it.
244
00:11:04,131 --> 00:11:05,833
Good for you.
245
00:11:05,833 --> 00:11:09,837
I know you all thought
I was a social misfit,
246
00:11:09,837 --> 00:11:11,839
Unable to function
On the streets.
247
00:11:11,839 --> 00:11:14,641
I not only got a job,
I got a great job.
248
00:11:14,641 --> 00:11:17,644
Yeah, I'm a proofreader for
A small publishing house.
249
00:11:17,644 --> 00:11:19,146
Isn't that perfect
For me?
250
00:11:19,146 --> 00:11:21,248
Oh, yeah.
I'm proud of you.
251
00:11:22,582 --> 00:11:25,853
Well, it's been
Two weeks of hell,
But I did it.
252
00:11:25,853 --> 00:11:27,254
So, what's
Going on here, norm?
253
00:11:27,254 --> 00:11:29,156
You've been looking
For months.
254
00:11:29,156 --> 00:11:31,725
And diane goes out there,
Snags a job in a couple
Of weeks.
255
00:11:31,725 --> 00:11:33,827
It's easier
For girls.
256
00:11:33,827 --> 00:11:35,095
I mean, if god had
Made me a woman,
257
00:11:35,095 --> 00:11:37,798
I'd never
Be out of work.
258
00:11:37,798 --> 00:11:41,334
Well, yeah, as long as
There are carnivals.
259
00:11:44,872 --> 00:11:48,241
Hey, uh, diane...
260
00:11:48,241 --> 00:11:50,577
I was skeptical about
You finding something,
261
00:11:50,577 --> 00:11:53,646
But I guess
It won't kill me
262
00:11:53,646 --> 00:11:57,684
To come out and say
Congratulations.
263
00:11:57,684 --> 00:11:59,686
Oh, thank you,
Carla.
264
00:11:59,686 --> 00:12:01,989
[gasping]
265
00:12:07,160 --> 00:12:09,696
Carla, get up,
Will you?
266
00:12:09,696 --> 00:12:11,832
[moaning]
267
00:12:14,034 --> 00:12:17,037
So, when do you start?
268
00:12:17,037 --> 00:12:19,706
Well, I'm not sure yet.
269
00:12:19,706 --> 00:12:21,041
How come?
270
00:12:21,041 --> 00:12:24,277
Well, the job isn't
Exactly officially,
271
00:12:24,277 --> 00:12:27,614
Technically, completely,
Finally definite.
272
00:12:27,614 --> 00:12:29,449
You don't have the job?
273
00:12:29,449 --> 00:12:30,884
No, I got the job.
274
00:12:30,884 --> 00:12:32,719
You mean
I poured out my heart
For nothing?
275
00:12:32,719 --> 00:12:34,687
I--I--
276
00:12:34,687 --> 00:12:38,058
Carla, I have the job.
I have the job!
277
00:12:42,329 --> 00:12:44,798
It's jus that there's
One small formality
278
00:12:44,798 --> 00:12:46,466
That has to be
Taken care of.
279
00:12:46,466 --> 00:12:48,101
And that's what?
280
00:12:48,101 --> 00:12:50,904
Well, mr. Hedges said
He wanted a reference
281
00:12:50,904 --> 00:12:52,873
From my previous employer.
282
00:12:52,873 --> 00:12:54,707
He's gonna call you tonight.
283
00:12:54,707 --> 00:12:58,879
You're going to say
Some wonderful things
About me, aren't you?
284
00:13:00,213 --> 00:13:02,249
Sam, we're gonna need
More red wine here.
285
00:13:02,249 --> 00:13:05,118
Ok. I'll tell him
That you are the best
Cocktail waitress
286
00:13:05,118 --> 00:13:07,254
I've ever seen
In my entire life.
287
00:13:07,254 --> 00:13:08,922
Then I'll tell him
That I'd like
288
00:13:08,922 --> 00:13:11,424
To sell him some
Land in florida
That I own.
289
00:13:11,424 --> 00:13:14,561
Really? Where is it?
We might be neighbors.
290
00:13:17,865 --> 00:13:21,201
I wonder what vera
Is doing tonight.
291
00:13:21,201 --> 00:13:24,704
Hey, by the way, normie,
How did you and vera meet
Anyway?
292
00:13:24,704 --> 00:13:25,939
Didn't I tell
You this, coach?
293
00:13:25,939 --> 00:13:27,674
We were
In high school
Together.
294
00:13:27,674 --> 00:13:29,509
We were?
295
00:13:29,509 --> 00:13:31,178
Not you and I.
Vera and I.
296
00:13:31,178 --> 00:13:32,946
Oh, good.
297
00:13:35,115 --> 00:13:37,918
She was a cute
Little thing
Back then.
298
00:13:37,918 --> 00:13:41,154
Boy, could she
Give a hickey.
299
00:13:41,154 --> 00:13:43,957
Famous all over
The midwest for it.
300
00:13:43,957 --> 00:13:46,293
She gave me one
The night of the
Senior prom.
301
00:13:46,293 --> 00:13:48,561
Lasted till a year
Ago christmas.
302
00:13:52,132 --> 00:13:54,935
Hey, give her a call,
Big fella, huh?
303
00:13:54,935 --> 00:13:57,437
I don't think so.
304
00:13:57,437 --> 00:13:59,272
Normie.
305
00:13:59,272 --> 00:14:02,009
Well, yeah. I probably
Should just see
How she's doing.
306
00:14:02,009 --> 00:14:04,577
Here, normie.
Save a dime. Wait.
307
00:14:04,577 --> 00:14:06,113
Thanks, coach.
308
00:14:08,048 --> 00:14:10,850
* are you
Lonesome tonight *
309
00:14:12,285 --> 00:14:14,654
* do you
Miss me tonight... *
310
00:14:14,654 --> 00:14:16,789
Vera, it's norm.
311
00:14:16,789 --> 00:14:18,291
How are you doing?
312
00:14:19,492 --> 00:14:20,727
Great, great, great.
313
00:14:20,727 --> 00:14:22,930
* does your
Memory stray... *
314
00:14:22,930 --> 00:14:25,098
So what
Are you up to?
315
00:14:26,833 --> 00:14:29,502
You have a date?
316
00:14:29,502 --> 00:14:31,138
Yes, I'm hurt.
317
00:14:31,138 --> 00:14:34,541
Well,
I know it's been
Two weeks, but...
318
00:14:34,541 --> 00:14:38,311
You know,
It so happens, I
Have a date myself.
319
00:14:38,311 --> 00:14:40,680
Yeah, I've been
Getting around.
320
00:14:40,680 --> 00:14:42,582
You don't
Believe me?
321
00:14:42,582 --> 00:14:44,017
Hey.
322
00:14:44,017 --> 00:14:45,618
She's right here.
You can talk to her yourself.
323
00:14:48,288 --> 00:14:49,622
Hello.
324
00:14:51,791 --> 00:14:54,094
Mrs. Peterson?
325
00:14:54,094 --> 00:14:56,863
Thank you for
Letting normie go.
326
00:14:56,863 --> 00:15:00,067
He's such an animal.
327
00:15:00,067 --> 00:15:01,468
I've never
Known a man
328
00:15:01,468 --> 00:15:04,437
Who can thrill me
The way he does.
329
00:15:04,437 --> 00:15:08,008
He touches me,
And I'm a woman.
330
00:15:08,008 --> 00:15:12,179
A total,
Quivering woman.
331
00:15:15,215 --> 00:15:17,717
All right.
Thanks, carla.
332
00:15:17,717 --> 00:15:19,552
Say, uh...Carla.
333
00:15:19,552 --> 00:15:21,354
You want to...
334
00:15:24,591 --> 00:15:26,893
You want to maybe,
Like, get some coffee
Or something?
335
00:15:26,893 --> 00:15:29,096
Get real.
336
00:15:29,096 --> 00:15:32,399
[telephone rings]
337
00:15:32,399 --> 00:15:34,301
Hello. Cheers.
338
00:15:34,301 --> 00:15:35,402
Yeah. He's in the back.
339
00:15:35,402 --> 00:15:38,138
Who can I say
Is calling? Hedges?
340
00:15:38,138 --> 00:15:40,040
Oh, coach.
That's my boss.
341
00:15:40,040 --> 00:15:44,144
You the ducky hedges
Who owes me 50 bucks?
342
00:15:44,144 --> 00:15:47,480
Oh, sure! Anybody can say
They're not ducky hedges.
343
00:15:47,480 --> 00:15:49,049
No! Coach!
344
00:15:49,049 --> 00:15:51,918
What was the color
Of red wilson's hair?
345
00:15:51,918 --> 00:15:54,287
Ducky!
346
00:15:54,287 --> 00:15:57,890
You bet I'm an idiot
For loaning you 50 bucks,
347
00:15:57,890 --> 00:16:00,027
You no-good chiseler!
348
00:16:00,027 --> 00:16:01,428
I loaned you
That money,
349
00:16:01,428 --> 00:16:03,363
And you thought I was
Gonna forget about it!
350
00:16:03,363 --> 00:16:05,332
Well, I fooled you!
I remembered it!
351
00:16:05,332 --> 00:16:07,900
Coach, come on.
Let me have it.
352
00:16:07,900 --> 00:16:11,571
Give it back
When you're through.
353
00:16:11,571 --> 00:16:13,373
Hello?
354
00:16:13,373 --> 00:16:14,607
Yeah, this is sam malone.
355
00:16:14,607 --> 00:16:16,376
No, I've been
Expecting your call.
356
00:16:16,376 --> 00:16:18,578
You probably want to know
All about diane chambers,
Right?
357
00:16:18,578 --> 00:16:20,747
Well, I can make this
Real simple.
358
00:16:20,747 --> 00:16:25,785
She's, uh, she's brilliant,
She's competent,
She's efficient,
359
00:16:25,785 --> 00:16:28,321
And I recommend her
Completely.
360
00:16:30,057 --> 00:16:31,591
What's that?
361
00:16:31,591 --> 00:16:34,694
Man to man? Yeah?
What do you
Want to know?
362
00:16:34,694 --> 00:16:38,098
I don't think I want
To answer that question.
363
00:16:38,098 --> 00:16:39,699
No. I don't think
I want to answer.
364
00:16:39,699 --> 00:16:41,434
Answer it.
365
00:16:41,434 --> 00:16:44,271
Yeah, I've
Seen her naked.
366
00:16:54,314 --> 00:16:56,316
Hello, mr. Hedges,
This is diane chambers.
367
00:16:56,316 --> 00:16:59,486
You're the most rotten,
Disgusting pig.
368
00:16:59,486 --> 00:17:01,921
I wouldn't
Work for you if it was--
369
00:17:01,921 --> 00:17:04,057
How much?
370
00:17:04,057 --> 00:17:06,025
Does that
Include medical?
371
00:17:06,025 --> 00:17:07,527
What am I saying?
372
00:17:07,527 --> 00:17:08,928
I wouldn't
Take your job
373
00:17:08,928 --> 00:17:11,298
If it were the last one
In boston.
374
00:17:11,298 --> 00:17:12,999
You told him, diane.
375
00:17:12,999 --> 00:17:15,802
I can kiss
That 50 bucks good-bye.
376
00:17:18,238 --> 00:17:20,873
He was only interested
In my body.
377
00:17:20,873 --> 00:17:25,378
You know, sometimes
I'm just ashamed
To be a guy,
378
00:17:25,378 --> 00:17:27,714
But if I made
The switch now,
379
00:17:27,714 --> 00:17:31,184
I'd have to buy
A whole new wardrobe.
380
00:17:31,184 --> 00:17:33,186
Men are beginning
To really disgust me,
381
00:17:33,186 --> 00:17:35,455
Even more than before.
382
00:17:35,455 --> 00:17:38,158
Oh, hey. Come on,
Lighten up here.
383
00:17:38,158 --> 00:17:39,726
I mean,
One rotten apple just--
384
00:17:39,726 --> 00:17:41,261
No, no. Not one.
385
00:17:41,261 --> 00:17:43,330
We're talking
Orchards here.
386
00:17:44,764 --> 00:17:47,567
The few scant offers
I've had for a job
387
00:17:47,567 --> 00:17:50,570
Have all had sexual
Strings attached.
388
00:17:50,570 --> 00:17:53,673
Boy, it just makes me crazy
To think of those guys
389
00:17:53,673 --> 00:17:56,676
Treating my squeeze
Like a sex object.
390
00:17:59,146 --> 00:18:01,013
Hear, hear.
391
00:18:01,013 --> 00:18:05,285
Well, I guess I'm not
Going to get any purely
Professional offers.
392
00:18:05,285 --> 00:18:08,087
Listen, listen, why don't
You just come back here
To the bar?
393
00:18:08,087 --> 00:18:11,391
I mean, this is where
You belong, this is
Where your people are,
394
00:18:11,391 --> 00:18:13,926
Where your friends are,
395
00:18:13,926 --> 00:18:16,829
Where your
Big guy are. Huh?
396
00:18:16,829 --> 00:18:18,365
Where my heart are.
397
00:18:18,365 --> 00:18:22,769
Yeah. Hey, guys,
I think she's
Coming back.
398
00:18:22,769 --> 00:18:24,437
Yay.
399
00:18:28,341 --> 00:18:32,545
Hey, why don't you
Let me go get my coat...
400
00:18:33,580 --> 00:18:36,383
Then we'll go
Over to my place...
401
00:18:37,584 --> 00:18:40,687
And we'll celebrate
Your homecoming.
402
00:18:40,687 --> 00:18:42,255
Great.
403
00:18:42,255 --> 00:18:43,856
You may need this.
404
00:19:03,510 --> 00:19:06,613
Sam, I was
Just thinking.
405
00:19:06,613 --> 00:19:09,449
Oh, yeah?
I tried that once.
Never cared for it.
406
00:19:09,449 --> 00:19:11,251
Come on,
Let's go.
407
00:19:11,251 --> 00:19:12,985
[coughing]
408
00:19:12,985 --> 00:19:14,120
Sam.
409
00:19:14,120 --> 00:19:15,722
Nice, huh?
410
00:19:18,325 --> 00:19:20,993
Why did you
Rehire me just now?
411
00:19:20,993 --> 00:19:22,862
I hired you
412
00:19:22,862 --> 00:19:25,164
Because you're
The best combination
Girlfriend/waitress
413
00:19:25,164 --> 00:19:26,366
In the city,
414
00:19:26,366 --> 00:19:29,035
And you stink
As a waitress.
415
00:19:29,035 --> 00:19:31,238
Exactly what I thought.
416
00:19:31,238 --> 00:19:34,541
You hired me
For sexual purposes,
417
00:19:34,541 --> 00:19:37,644
Just like that swine
Mr. Hedges wanted to do.
418
00:19:37,644 --> 00:19:41,047
Oh, come on. It's
Completely different.
419
00:19:41,047 --> 00:19:44,284
How is it
Completely different?
420
00:19:45,852 --> 00:19:47,920
Well...
421
00:19:47,920 --> 00:19:50,557
All right, all right,
For instance, uh...
422
00:19:50,557 --> 00:19:52,425
You're nuts about me.
423
00:19:53,893 --> 00:19:55,728
Yes. But who knows?
424
00:19:55,728 --> 00:19:59,432
In time,
I may have become
Nuts about him.
425
00:19:59,432 --> 00:20:03,135
Well, we had a few
Things in common.
426
00:20:03,135 --> 00:20:04,837
We both
Found me adorable.
427
00:20:04,837 --> 00:20:06,138
That's good.
428
00:20:06,138 --> 00:20:07,173
This is serious here.
429
00:20:07,173 --> 00:20:08,608
All right, all right.
430
00:20:08,608 --> 00:20:10,009
Now, how can
I come back here
431
00:20:10,009 --> 00:20:11,511
Knowing that you
Think of me
432
00:20:11,511 --> 00:20:14,681
As nothing but
Your...Handmaiden?
433
00:20:17,350 --> 00:20:20,253
You know, diane,
434
00:20:20,253 --> 00:20:22,255
It gets me
The way you women
435
00:20:22,255 --> 00:20:25,592
Are always talking
About sex on the job,
436
00:20:25,592 --> 00:20:28,361
I mean, as if you're
The only victims.
437
00:20:28,361 --> 00:20:31,964
What about me?
438
00:20:31,964 --> 00:20:33,600
What about you?
439
00:20:33,600 --> 00:20:35,302
You telling me
You took this job
440
00:20:35,302 --> 00:20:37,203
Because you wanted
To be a waitress?
441
00:20:37,203 --> 00:20:39,572
Absolutely not. I...
442
00:20:39,572 --> 00:20:41,073
I had
A burning desire
443
00:20:41,073 --> 00:20:43,376
To discover
And explore
444
00:20:43,376 --> 00:20:46,579
This vein of
American culture.
445
00:20:46,579 --> 00:20:49,248
Bull. You had
A burning desire
446
00:20:49,248 --> 00:20:52,852
To discover and explore
Mount sammy here.
447
00:20:55,955 --> 00:20:57,457
What are you saying?
448
00:20:57,457 --> 00:20:59,359
I'm saying you took this job
Because I was here.
449
00:20:59,359 --> 00:21:01,160
You had sex
On your mind, too.
450
00:21:01,160 --> 00:21:04,196
That's not true.
451
00:21:04,196 --> 00:21:06,399
Not entirely true.
452
00:21:07,900 --> 00:21:10,503
Yeah. Well, how do you
Think it makes me feel
453
00:21:10,503 --> 00:21:12,305
Knowing the first
Time you saw me
454
00:21:12,305 --> 00:21:15,508
You undressed me
With your eyes?
455
00:21:15,508 --> 00:21:19,011
You have no regard
For my dignity
As a man,
456
00:21:19,011 --> 00:21:20,647
As an employer.
457
00:21:20,647 --> 00:21:21,748
I was just
A challenge to you,
458
00:21:21,748 --> 00:21:23,115
Another notch
On your belt.
459
00:21:23,115 --> 00:21:24,784
Well, let me tell
You something,
Miss chambers,
460
00:21:24,784 --> 00:21:27,720
I'm a person,
I have dignity, too,
You know.
461
00:21:28,921 --> 00:21:32,392
I know
You have no regard
For this job.
462
00:21:32,392 --> 00:21:33,726
You continually
Tell me
463
00:21:33,726 --> 00:21:35,227
That I have the brain
Of a cucumber.
464
00:21:35,227 --> 00:21:37,530
So what's left?
The only thing
That's left
465
00:21:37,530 --> 00:21:41,334
Is that you want
Your physical lust
Satisfied,
466
00:21:41,334 --> 00:21:43,403
And that's
Where I come in.
467
00:21:47,907 --> 00:21:51,110
Well, there's only
One thing to do.
468
00:21:51,110 --> 00:21:52,745
I know, I know.
469
00:21:52,745 --> 00:21:54,947
I'll undress
And do my duty.
470
00:21:54,947 --> 00:21:56,416
No, no.
471
00:21:58,385 --> 00:22:00,520
No, you've shown me
The light.
472
00:22:00,520 --> 00:22:02,422
I've been a cad.
473
00:22:03,790 --> 00:22:07,427
Ok. I propose
That you and I
474
00:22:07,427 --> 00:22:09,529
Abstain from any sort
Of physical contact
475
00:22:09,529 --> 00:22:11,531
For a period
Of one month.
476
00:22:11,531 --> 00:22:14,000
Strictly business
For one month.
477
00:22:14,000 --> 00:22:18,971
I think it's the only way
That each of us can regain
Our self-respect.
478
00:22:18,971 --> 00:22:21,374
I think that's
A very good idea.
479
00:22:21,374 --> 00:22:23,410
It would
Help me out a lot.
480
00:22:23,410 --> 00:22:27,246
Fine. One month
It is, mr. Malone.
481
00:22:27,246 --> 00:22:28,948
Miss chambers.
482
00:22:30,282 --> 00:22:34,153
Oh. There is just
One more thing.
483
00:22:34,153 --> 00:22:35,588
I think...
484
00:22:35,588 --> 00:22:38,458
Please, have a seat.
485
00:22:38,458 --> 00:22:40,960
I think that
My self-respect
Bounces back
486
00:22:40,960 --> 00:22:44,631
Just
A little quicker
Than you expect.
487
00:22:44,631 --> 00:22:49,569
I think two weeks of
Strictly business,
488
00:22:49,569 --> 00:22:52,304
And I'd be back
In peak shape.
489
00:22:52,304 --> 00:22:54,140
You know, maybe
If I concentrate...
490
00:22:54,140 --> 00:22:55,975
One week.
491
00:22:55,975 --> 00:22:58,678
Well, I believe that
My recuperative powers
492
00:22:58,678 --> 00:23:01,681
Are even greater
Than yours.
493
00:23:01,681 --> 00:23:04,150
A day would be fine
With me.
494
00:23:04,150 --> 00:23:05,985
You know,
I think the important
Thing here
495
00:23:05,985 --> 00:23:08,821
Is we both know
In our minds that
We could stop.
496
00:23:08,821 --> 00:23:10,790
I think--
497
00:23:12,692 --> 00:23:16,763
I think an hour would
Certainly prove that.
498
00:23:16,763 --> 00:23:18,898
Well, from that argument
499
00:23:18,898 --> 00:23:22,268
It follows that 15 minutes
Would be adequate.
500
00:23:22,268 --> 00:23:25,004
You know, I believe
That's just enough time
To get back to my place.
501
00:23:25,004 --> 00:23:27,073
Let's hurry.
35285
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