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1
00:00:00,263 --> 00:00:01,954
Previously on
The Big Bang Theory...
2
00:00:02,154 --> 00:00:05,325
Actually, I-I need to talk to
both of you about your paper.
3
00:00:05,326 --> 00:00:07,218
Oh, right, how are
the citations coming?
4
00:00:07,242 --> 00:00:08,028
Um...
5
00:00:08,029 --> 00:00:11,530
We came a-across
a-a Russian paper
6
00:00:11,599 --> 00:00:13,766
that seems to disprove
super-asymmetry.
7
00:00:18,272 --> 00:00:19,705
(screams)
8
00:00:22,443 --> 00:00:24,777
Okay, Sheldon and Amy
are still pretty upset
9
00:00:24,846 --> 00:00:26,512
about their theory
being disproved.
10
00:00:26,581 --> 00:00:29,081
So we have made
a list of subjects
11
00:00:29,150 --> 00:00:30,416
for everyone
to avoid.
12
00:00:30,485 --> 00:00:32,051
- Symmetry.
- Asymmetry.
13
00:00:32,120 --> 00:00:33,219
Uh, SimCity--
14
00:00:33,321 --> 00:00:34,887
sounds too much like symmetry.
15
00:00:34,956 --> 00:00:36,756
LEONARD:
That also applies
16
00:00:36,824 --> 00:00:38,791
to The Simpsons,
Simba from The Lion King,
17
00:00:38,860 --> 00:00:39,959
and cymbals.
18
00:00:40,027 --> 00:00:42,962
Russia or Russian
in any context.
19
00:00:43,030 --> 00:00:45,164
The country, the dressing,
the roulette.
20
00:00:46,567 --> 00:00:48,968
Uh, also no talk of Rocky IV.
21
00:00:49,036 --> 00:00:50,736
Why Rocky IV?
22
00:00:50,805 --> 00:00:52,071
Because he fights
a Russian.
23
00:00:52,140 --> 00:00:55,708
I'm sorry about her.
(chuckles)
24
00:00:55,777 --> 00:00:57,821
We should just try and avoid
anything that makes them think
25
00:00:57,845 --> 00:00:59,712
of their project
or science
26
00:00:59,781 --> 00:01:02,581
or Nobel Prizes
or successes or failures.
27
00:01:02,650 --> 00:01:04,950
- Hi.
ALL: Hi!
28
00:01:05,019 --> 00:01:06,519
Hey, guys.
Hey-a!
29
00:01:06,587 --> 00:01:07,853
What are you guys doing?
30
00:01:08,890 --> 00:01:10,055
Nothing.
31
00:01:10,124 --> 00:01:11,223
Nothing?
32
00:01:11,292 --> 00:01:15,194
Like what my career
has come to? Thanks a lot.
33
00:01:17,799 --> 00:01:18,656
Nice going.
34
00:01:18,657 --> 00:01:21,157
♪ The Big Bang Theory 12x10 ♪
The VCR Illumination
Original Air Date on December 6, 2018
35
00:01:21,168 --> 00:01:24,270
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
36
00:01:24,338 --> 00:01:27,807
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪
37
00:01:27,875 --> 00:01:29,441
♪ The Earth began to cool ♪
38
00:01:29,510 --> 00:01:32,178
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
39
00:01:32,246 --> 00:01:34,680
♪ We built the Wall ♪
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
40
00:01:34,749 --> 00:01:37,383
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
41
00:01:37,451 --> 00:01:39,285
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
42
00:01:39,353 --> 00:01:40,551
♪ Bang! ♪
43
00:01:40,552 --> 00:01:45,552
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man
44
00:01:45,577 --> 00:01:47,511
(music playing)
45
00:01:49,000 --> 00:01:55,074
Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today
46
00:01:58,824 --> 00:02:00,323
What are you doing?
47
00:02:00,392 --> 00:02:01,958
Eating, reading,
48
00:02:02,027 --> 00:02:03,338
watching television,
listening to the radio.
49
00:02:03,362 --> 00:02:04,728
What does it look
like I'm doing?
50
00:02:06,832 --> 00:02:09,332
Is that asparagus? I thought
you hate asparagus.
51
00:02:09,401 --> 00:02:11,535
I thought so, too, but I also
thought super-asymmetry
52
00:02:11,603 --> 00:02:13,804
was a good idea,
so what else am I wrong about?
53
00:02:13,872 --> 00:02:17,007
Oh, so now you're
reevaluating
54
00:02:17,076 --> 00:02:18,709
every opinion you've ever had?
55
00:02:18,777 --> 00:02:20,977
Yes. I am following the example
56
00:02:21,046 --> 00:02:23,180
of 17th century philosopher
René Descartes.
57
00:02:23,248 --> 00:02:24,815
He subjected
all his beliefs
58
00:02:24,883 --> 00:02:27,350
to radical doubt so that he
could build a bedrock belief
59
00:02:27,419 --> 00:02:30,754
and build his cognitive life
back up on firm principles.
60
00:02:30,823 --> 00:02:33,056
Ugh! Still yucky, still yucky.
61
00:02:35,127 --> 00:02:36,393
(music stops)
62
00:02:36,462 --> 00:02:39,129
Sheldon, I know you're upset
about the paper, okay.
63
00:02:39,198 --> 00:02:40,297
I'm upset, too.
64
00:02:40,365 --> 00:02:42,232
I mean, I was so sure
we were right.
65
00:02:42,301 --> 00:02:44,634
Every fiber of my being
felt like this was it.
66
00:02:44,703 --> 00:02:47,671
This was the one. How can I
trust my instincts anymore?
67
00:02:47,740 --> 00:02:49,339
Well, just because
our theory was wrong,
68
00:02:49,408 --> 00:02:51,541
that doesn't mean you're wrong
about everything.
69
00:02:51,610 --> 00:02:54,644
Doesn't it? I've always thought
I hated jazz, maybe I was wrong.
70
00:02:54,713 --> 00:02:56,713
Maybe it's great to hear
all the notes at once.
71
00:02:56,782 --> 00:02:58,715
(music playing)
72
00:03:01,420 --> 00:03:04,187
I'm trying,
I'm really trying!
73
00:03:07,760 --> 00:03:10,093
- What you eating?
- Chicken fried steak.
74
00:03:10,162 --> 00:03:12,562
What? You can't have
chicken fried steak
75
00:03:12,631 --> 00:03:14,331
first thing in the morning.
- Hey,
76
00:03:14,399 --> 00:03:17,234
you knew I was a bad boy
when you married me.
77
00:03:17,302 --> 00:03:19,870
Come on, you want
a piece of this?
78
00:03:19,938 --> 00:03:22,506
You or the steak?
79
00:03:22,574 --> 00:03:24,040
Me.
I'm not sharing the steak.
80
00:03:24,109 --> 00:03:25,242
(knocking)
81
00:03:25,310 --> 00:03:27,511
Hey, you guys busy?
82
00:03:27,579 --> 00:03:28,979
No, what's going on?
83
00:03:29,047 --> 00:03:31,715
I'm really worried
about Sheldon.
84
00:03:31,784 --> 00:03:33,450
I've never seen him this down.
85
00:03:33,519 --> 00:03:35,418
Have you tried making him
a cup of tea?
86
00:03:35,487 --> 00:03:38,555
He's reevaluated tea.
87
00:03:39,925 --> 00:03:42,893
Now he thinks it's nothing
but leaf soup.
88
00:03:42,961 --> 00:03:44,694
That's a good point.
89
00:03:44,763 --> 00:03:46,696
- No, it's not.
- No, it's not.
90
00:03:46,765 --> 00:03:48,632
He's rethinking everything.
91
00:03:48,700 --> 00:03:50,901
How long is it gonna be
before he gets to me?
92
00:03:50,969 --> 00:03:53,270
- Oh.
- It's that bad, huh?
93
00:03:53,338 --> 00:03:55,972
I'm afraid so. I just...
I don't know what to do.
94
00:03:56,041 --> 00:03:58,909
I have something
that might help.
95
00:03:58,977 --> 00:04:01,912
It's-it's a recording
of the only person
96
00:04:01,980 --> 00:04:04,981
whose opinion Sheldon
actually respects.
97
00:04:05,050 --> 00:04:06,249
Hawking?
98
00:04:06,318 --> 00:04:07,484
Feynman?
99
00:04:07,553 --> 00:04:09,352
No, himself.
100
00:04:11,089 --> 00:04:13,290
It's a pep talk he made
when he was a kid.
101
00:04:13,358 --> 00:04:16,026
He gave it to me years ago
and told me to save it
102
00:04:16,128 --> 00:04:17,661
for a real emergency.
103
00:04:17,729 --> 00:04:19,429
What?
You didn't break it out
104
00:04:19,498 --> 00:04:21,464
when he declared his room
a sovereign nation
105
00:04:21,533 --> 00:04:24,401
and waged a trade war
against us?
106
00:04:24,469 --> 00:04:28,138
His major export is talking.
I didn't want that anyway.
107
00:04:33,212 --> 00:04:34,678
Is that a VCR?
108
00:04:34,746 --> 00:04:37,147
Yeah, Amy asked if we
had one she could borrow
109
00:04:37,216 --> 00:04:39,249
and I just want to make sure
it still works.
110
00:04:39,318 --> 00:04:40,784
What's on the tape?
111
00:04:40,853 --> 00:04:43,854
Not sure. I used to record
a lot of Jeopardy! for my mom,
112
00:04:43,922 --> 00:04:45,700
but if I push play
and you see some naked people...
113
00:04:45,724 --> 00:04:48,291
Got it.
What is porn?
114
00:04:48,360 --> 00:04:50,961
Ooh, we were looking
for "vintage '80s erotica,"
115
00:04:51,029 --> 00:04:52,329
but I'll accept it.
116
00:04:52,397 --> 00:04:54,397
WOLOWITZ:
Hello, everybody.
117
00:04:56,935 --> 00:05:00,337
I am The Great Howdini.
118
00:05:00,405 --> 00:05:03,607
(coughing)
119
00:05:03,675 --> 00:05:07,010
Put it back on.
You look adorable.
120
00:05:07,079 --> 00:05:08,445
It's just a practice tape
121
00:05:08,513 --> 00:05:11,882
from when I was trying to become
a member of the Magic Castle.
122
00:05:11,950 --> 00:05:13,817
I didn't know
you auditioned there.
123
00:05:13,886 --> 00:05:15,352
Oh, I never went
through with it.
124
00:05:15,420 --> 00:05:18,154
I watched the tape and realized
I wasn't good enough.
125
00:05:18,223 --> 00:05:21,324
You know that trick where
you saw a mannequin in half?
126
00:05:21,393 --> 00:05:24,194
- Don't you mean a lady?
- Thank God it was not a lady.
127
00:05:24,263 --> 00:05:26,062
I'd just be getting
out of jail.
128
00:05:27,165 --> 00:05:30,066
Come on, you're
a good magician.
129
00:05:30,135 --> 00:05:33,236
Really? You always
called magic dumb.
130
00:05:33,305 --> 00:05:35,071
You can be good
at something dumb.
131
00:05:36,608 --> 00:05:39,009
- You know what, you should audition now.
- It's fine.
132
00:05:39,077 --> 00:05:42,646
I don't need to be a member of
the most elite magical society
133
00:05:42,714 --> 00:05:45,448
on the face
of the earth.
134
00:05:45,517 --> 00:05:47,484
Sounds like you still want it.
135
00:05:47,552 --> 00:05:49,119
And I don't want our kids
136
00:05:49,187 --> 00:05:51,655
to watch this tape one day and
think their dad is a quitter.
137
00:05:51,723 --> 00:05:53,924
Oh, we don't have to
show it to them.
138
00:05:53,992 --> 00:05:56,259
Oh, I'm definitely
showing it to them.
139
00:05:58,897 --> 00:06:00,664
Hey.
140
00:06:00,732 --> 00:06:01,965
Hello.
141
00:06:03,902 --> 00:06:05,502
"Fine with flags"?
142
00:06:07,906 --> 00:06:09,940
Yes, flags--
143
00:06:10,008 --> 00:06:12,375
up there flapping around
on poles.
144
00:06:12,444 --> 00:06:14,355
If you think about it,
they're just the strippers
145
00:06:14,379 --> 00:06:16,513
of the emblem world.
146
00:06:16,581 --> 00:06:18,848
Well, I got something
147
00:06:18,917 --> 00:06:21,051
that I think
might cheer you up.
148
00:06:21,119 --> 00:06:24,321
It is the emergency pep talk
you made when you were a kid.
149
00:06:24,389 --> 00:06:27,057
Oh, that.
150
00:06:27,125 --> 00:06:30,460
I was saving it for the day they
stop making Star Wars movies.
151
00:06:32,097 --> 00:06:34,497
I don't think that's
ever gonna happen.
152
00:06:34,566 --> 00:06:38,268
How long has it been
since you've seen it?
153
00:06:38,337 --> 00:06:40,170
Not since the day I recorded it.
154
00:06:40,238 --> 00:06:42,405
No, I had just watched
Back to the Future II,
155
00:06:42,474 --> 00:06:45,141
where Marty McFly gets a glimpse
of his future self
156
00:06:45,210 --> 00:06:46,509
and that got me thinking,
157
00:06:46,578 --> 00:06:49,312
the day may come
where I needed my help,
158
00:06:49,381 --> 00:06:52,315
like they did with that movie.
That was not great.
159
00:06:52,384 --> 00:06:55,785
Okay, all hooked up.
160
00:06:55,854 --> 00:06:58,288
Here we go.
161
00:07:01,226 --> 00:07:03,526
Oh, look how cute you were.
162
00:07:03,595 --> 00:07:07,163
Amy please, of course I was
cute. Look how I turned out.
163
00:07:07,232 --> 00:07:08,898
Hello, Sheldon.
164
00:07:08,967 --> 00:07:10,600
Hello, Sheldon.
165
00:07:10,669 --> 00:07:11,935
If you're watching this,
166
00:07:12,004 --> 00:07:14,504
I assume something bad
has happened.
167
00:07:14,573 --> 00:07:16,172
Something unfortunate
and unforeseen.
168
00:07:16,241 --> 00:07:19,542
Something that's making you
169
00:07:19,611 --> 00:07:21,211
question everything.
170
00:07:21,279 --> 00:07:24,581
I'm so smart.
171
00:07:24,649 --> 00:07:26,916
Now just to make sure
it's really you watching this
172
00:07:26,985 --> 00:07:30,453
and not an imposter,
what am I thinking of?
173
00:07:30,522 --> 00:07:32,055
On the count of three.
174
00:07:32,124 --> 00:07:34,924
One, two, three.
175
00:07:34,993 --> 00:07:38,228
Robot monkey butler.
Robot monkey butler.
176
00:07:38,296 --> 00:07:40,096
Okay, good.
177
00:07:40,165 --> 00:07:43,466
Should I leave
you two alone?
178
00:07:43,535 --> 00:07:46,936
No, this is gonna be inspiring.
You should watch.
179
00:07:47,005 --> 00:07:49,706
Sheldon, never forget,
180
00:07:49,775 --> 00:07:51,908
no matter how bad things seem,
181
00:07:51,977 --> 00:07:53,209
you can Al...
182
00:07:56,615 --> 00:07:59,682
What? What...
No. N... (scoffs)
183
00:07:59,751 --> 00:08:01,017
My dad taped over it
184
00:08:01,086 --> 00:08:03,653
with one of his stupid
high school football games.
185
00:08:03,722 --> 00:08:04,921
Sorry.
186
00:08:04,990 --> 00:08:06,734
You know, it doesn't matter,
nothing matters.
187
00:08:06,758 --> 00:08:08,491
Is there anything
I can do?
188
00:08:08,560 --> 00:08:10,493
Yes. You can build me
a time machine
189
00:08:10,562 --> 00:08:13,329
so I can go back and tell my
younger self to give up, because
190
00:08:13,398 --> 00:08:15,038
nothing's gonna work out
the way he wants.
191
00:08:19,104 --> 00:08:21,037
I was thinking a nice cup
of leaf soup.
192
00:08:28,455 --> 00:08:29,706
What's all this?
193
00:08:29,707 --> 00:08:31,707
Your magic tricks
from the garage.
194
00:08:31,776 --> 00:08:35,477
Your wands, your top hat
with the stuffed mouse inside.
195
00:08:35,546 --> 00:08:37,279
I never had a stuffed mouse.
196
00:08:37,348 --> 00:08:39,715
Okay, do not wear this hat.
197
00:08:39,784 --> 00:08:43,018
Why is it all
in the living room?
198
00:08:43,087 --> 00:08:44,920
Because I think
The Great Howdini
199
00:08:44,989 --> 00:08:47,256
deserves to be a member
of the Magic Castle.
200
00:08:47,324 --> 00:08:50,659
That's sweet, but I'm
not that guy anymore.
201
00:08:50,728 --> 00:08:52,661
I've outgrown it.
202
00:08:54,398 --> 00:08:56,365
Have you?
203
00:08:57,802 --> 00:09:01,036
Look, I know you still
want this, and I can help you.
204
00:09:01,105 --> 00:09:02,938
All those pageants
I did as a kid--
205
00:09:03,007 --> 00:09:04,907
I could teach you
how to present yourself,
206
00:09:04,975 --> 00:09:07,409
connect with the judges,
sabotage the competition.
207
00:09:07,478 --> 00:09:09,778
Whoa, whoa, no one's
sabotaging anybody.
208
00:09:09,847 --> 00:09:11,046
Of course not.
209
00:09:11,115 --> 00:09:14,683
Little girls in ball gowns
trip, it happens.
210
00:09:14,752 --> 00:09:18,253
Trust me, I'm gonna be
the pageant mom to you
211
00:09:18,322 --> 00:09:19,588
that my mom was to me.
212
00:09:19,657 --> 00:09:22,224
I thought you hated your mom
for making you do that.
213
00:09:22,293 --> 00:09:25,060
More talk like that and
you're not getting any dinner.
214
00:09:25,129 --> 00:09:27,696
Amazing how it all comes back.
215
00:09:30,334 --> 00:09:32,267
(Skype ringing)
216
00:09:34,338 --> 00:09:35,604
Yes?
217
00:09:35,673 --> 00:09:38,140
- Hello, Mother.
- Hey, Beverly.
218
00:09:38,209 --> 00:09:39,842
Hello, Leonard.
Hello, Penny.
219
00:09:39,910 --> 00:09:41,877
To what do I owe this call?
220
00:09:41,946 --> 00:09:43,345
I need your
professional advice.
221
00:09:43,414 --> 00:09:44,980
Well, I'd love
to help you out, dear,
222
00:09:45,049 --> 00:09:46,915
but I'm very busy at the moment.
223
00:09:46,984 --> 00:09:49,151
Perhaps we can schedule
a time next week.
224
00:09:49,220 --> 00:09:50,252
It's about Sheldon.
225
00:09:50,321 --> 00:09:51,854
Oh, well, I-I suppose
226
00:09:51,922 --> 00:09:53,722
I can spare a minute or two.
227
00:09:53,791 --> 00:09:56,358
Wh-Why did you just say
you're too busy, but...
228
00:09:56,427 --> 00:09:59,528
Leonard, please,
not everything is about you.
229
00:10:01,799 --> 00:10:03,065
Penny, go on.
230
00:10:03,133 --> 00:10:05,601
Well, ever since his
paper got disproven,
231
00:10:05,669 --> 00:10:06,869
he's been a wreck.
232
00:10:06,937 --> 00:10:09,538
He's been sad
and... and angry.
233
00:10:09,607 --> 00:10:11,573
He just seems
kind of broken.
234
00:10:11,642 --> 00:10:13,153
Well, it sounds
like he may be grieving.
235
00:10:13,177 --> 00:10:14,276
Really?
236
00:10:14,345 --> 00:10:16,011
- Over a theory?
- Of course.
237
00:10:16,080 --> 00:10:18,146
You can grieve
over any emotional loss.
238
00:10:18,215 --> 00:10:19,781
The more you care
about something,
239
00:10:19,850 --> 00:10:21,950
the greater the trauma
of losing it.
240
00:10:22,019 --> 00:10:23,952
Oh, boy.
He cared about this a lot.
241
00:10:24,021 --> 00:10:26,088
Yeah. What can we do
to help him?
242
00:10:26,156 --> 00:10:28,290
Well, grieving is a process.
243
00:10:28,359 --> 00:10:31,293
Every culture has its own
rituals and traditions
244
00:10:31,362 --> 00:10:33,295
to facilitate mourning.
245
00:10:33,364 --> 00:10:36,298
The ancient Egyptians
had their mummification,
246
00:10:36,367 --> 00:10:39,201
the Tibetans had
their sky funerals...
247
00:10:39,270 --> 00:10:41,481
And when I was little and my dog
died, my mom sat me down
248
00:10:41,505 --> 00:10:43,739
and very gently told me
that she wished the truck
249
00:10:43,807 --> 00:10:45,941
had hit my dad instead.
250
00:10:47,978 --> 00:10:49,745
I was trying
to lighten the mood.
251
00:10:49,813 --> 00:10:52,180
Your dog had just died.
252
00:10:55,419 --> 00:10:58,587
Howard and I have been working
really hard on his audition,
253
00:10:58,656 --> 00:11:00,734
so it'll be helpful to get
another set of eyes on it.
254
00:11:00,758 --> 00:11:02,502
Well, as someone who has
watched every episode
255
00:11:02,526 --> 00:11:03,792
of America's Got Talent,
256
00:11:03,861 --> 00:11:05,171
I'm getting pretty good
at telling
257
00:11:05,195 --> 00:11:07,129
when some American's got talent.
258
00:11:07,197 --> 00:11:08,797
Seriously,
259
00:11:08,866 --> 00:11:11,199
Heidi and I agree,
like, 90% of the time.
260
00:11:11,268 --> 00:11:12,868
All right.
261
00:11:12,937 --> 00:11:15,404
Don't be afraid to be
brutally honest.
262
00:11:15,472 --> 00:11:17,806
Like my mom used to say
when I was doing pageants,
263
00:11:17,875 --> 00:11:20,842
"Tears only make your eyes
sparkle brighter."
264
00:11:20,911 --> 00:11:23,178
That is both sad and true.
265
00:11:23,247 --> 00:11:25,681
Half my Instagram
is after a good cry.
266
00:11:25,749 --> 00:11:28,016
Howie, you ready?
267
00:11:28,085 --> 00:11:29,685
WOLOWITZ (flat):
Yeah.
268
00:11:29,753 --> 00:11:34,056
I now present The Great Howdini.
269
00:11:34,124 --> 00:11:35,724
(music playing)
270
00:11:41,398 --> 00:11:45,434
♪ I've got magic to do,
just for you ♪
271
00:11:45,502 --> 00:11:48,570
♪ I've got miracle plays
to play ♪
272
00:11:48,639 --> 00:11:53,408
♪ I've got parts to perform,
hearts to warm ♪
273
00:11:53,477 --> 00:11:57,879
♪ Kings and things
to take by storm ♪
274
00:11:57,948 --> 00:12:00,749
♪ As we go along our ♪
275
00:12:00,818 --> 00:12:06,421
♪ Way. ♪
276
00:12:10,494 --> 00:12:14,763
Hello. I'm The Great Howdini
from Altadena, California.
277
00:12:14,832 --> 00:12:16,698
I have no brothers or sisters
278
00:12:16,767 --> 00:12:21,370
and my favorite thing to eat
is grilled cheese.
279
00:12:21,438 --> 00:12:22,871
When does the magic start?
280
00:12:22,973 --> 00:12:26,341
It already started.
281
00:12:27,778 --> 00:12:29,544
Hey.
282
00:12:29,613 --> 00:12:31,713
Hi. How are
you guys doing?
283
00:12:31,782 --> 00:12:33,382
A little better,
if you can believe it.
284
00:12:40,457 --> 00:12:41,323
Sheldon?
285
00:12:41,392 --> 00:12:43,492
(muffled):
Go away.
286
00:12:43,560 --> 00:12:45,560
Buddy, come on, let us help you.
287
00:12:45,629 --> 00:12:47,562
The only person
who could help me was erased
288
00:12:47,631 --> 00:12:49,765
by the Medford High Wolves.
289
00:12:49,833 --> 00:12:52,334
Oh, that's funny. My high
school was also the wolves.
290
00:12:52,403 --> 00:12:54,770
No? Not now? Okay.
291
00:12:54,838 --> 00:12:56,805
LEONARD: Look,
t-this might
292
00:12:56,874 --> 00:12:58,640
seem strange, but, uh,
293
00:12:58,709 --> 00:13:01,154
we thought it might help you get
some closure if you had a chance
294
00:13:01,178 --> 00:13:03,011
to properly say good-bye
to your paper.
295
00:13:03,080 --> 00:13:04,657
Yeah, you know, we
could say a few words,
296
00:13:04,681 --> 00:13:06,126
you could talk about
what it meant to you
297
00:13:06,150 --> 00:13:08,150
and-and we could
bury it somewhere.
298
00:13:08,218 --> 00:13:10,519
You mean have a funeral
for our theory?
299
00:13:10,587 --> 00:13:11,753
Yeah.
300
00:13:11,822 --> 00:13:13,021
That's ridiculous.
301
00:13:13,090 --> 00:13:15,657
I thought so, too, but my mom
thought it might work.
302
00:13:15,726 --> 00:13:18,493
Beverly thought it would help?
We should try it.
303
00:13:18,562 --> 00:13:20,929
Wha-- How come when you thought
it was my idea...
304
00:13:20,998 --> 00:13:22,264
SHELDON:
(stammers) Leonard,
305
00:13:22,332 --> 00:13:24,066
please, this is not about you.
306
00:13:26,203 --> 00:13:28,336
I guess we could bury it
in the park.
307
00:13:28,405 --> 00:13:30,338
Yeah, where dogs do their
business and other dogs
308
00:13:30,407 --> 00:13:32,441
sniff that business?
- I don't think so.
309
00:13:32,509 --> 00:13:34,943
What would you
like to do, Sheldon?
310
00:13:37,081 --> 00:13:39,781
The only fitting send-off:
311
00:13:39,850 --> 00:13:41,049
a Viking funeral.
312
00:13:41,118 --> 00:13:42,884
You mean, like,
push it out into a lake
313
00:13:42,953 --> 00:13:44,453
and shoot it
with a flaming arrow?
314
00:13:44,521 --> 00:13:47,522
This guy gets it.
315
00:13:47,591 --> 00:13:49,391
How about a bathtub
and a match?
316
00:13:49,460 --> 00:13:52,194
How about a bathtub
and a flaming arrow?
317
00:13:52,262 --> 00:13:55,530
How about a bathtub, a match
and an ice-cold Yoo-hoo after?
318
00:13:55,599 --> 00:13:58,133
Sold.
319
00:13:59,570 --> 00:14:01,670
(sighs)
320
00:14:01,738 --> 00:14:04,306
Would you like to say something?
321
00:14:04,374 --> 00:14:06,308
Y-Yes, thank you.
322
00:14:06,376 --> 00:14:10,745
I know this is just
a scientific theory,
323
00:14:10,814 --> 00:14:12,714
but to me, it was
more than that.
324
00:14:12,783 --> 00:14:16,218
It described the universe
in a new and beautiful way.
325
00:14:16,286 --> 00:14:19,554
I want that to be the
universe we live in,
326
00:14:19,623 --> 00:14:22,023
but I guess it's not.
327
00:14:22,092 --> 00:14:25,961
Amy, would you like
to shoot the arrow?
328
00:14:39,810 --> 00:14:41,877
It's kind of beautiful,
isn't it?
329
00:14:41,945 --> 00:14:44,646
Yeah, it is.
330
00:14:48,619 --> 00:14:50,619
It's getting kind of
close to the curtain.
331
00:14:50,687 --> 00:14:51,887
It's in water, it's fine.
332
00:14:51,955 --> 00:14:54,089
- Oh!
- Oh!
333
00:14:54,158 --> 00:14:56,191
Oh!
334
00:14:56,260 --> 00:14:57,701
Looks like we both had theories
that were wrong.
335
00:14:57,725 --> 00:14:58,951
PENNY: Okay...
336
00:15:03,367 --> 00:15:04,799
Are you getting sick?
337
00:15:04,868 --> 00:15:08,103
No, I have glitter in my nose.
338
00:15:08,172 --> 00:15:10,105
Just your nose?
339
00:15:10,174 --> 00:15:12,073
Consider yourself lucky.
340
00:15:12,142 --> 00:15:13,975
Hey, I'm gonna
341
00:15:14,044 --> 00:15:15,143
take tomorrow off
342
00:15:15,212 --> 00:15:17,279
so we can spend the whole day
running the act.
343
00:15:17,347 --> 00:15:21,917
You know what, it has been
so much fun working on this
344
00:15:21,985 --> 00:15:23,585
with you, but...
- But what?
345
00:15:23,654 --> 00:15:25,120
It hasn't.
346
00:15:26,323 --> 00:15:28,056
I'm not gonna audition.
347
00:15:28,125 --> 00:15:29,891
Hey, I didn't raise a quitter.
348
00:15:29,960 --> 00:15:31,626
You didn't raise me at all.
349
00:15:31,695 --> 00:15:33,995
Look,
350
00:15:34,064 --> 00:15:36,665
I get that you're scared, but
we just have to push past that.
351
00:15:36,733 --> 00:15:38,833
I'm not scared.
I don't like the act.
352
00:15:38,902 --> 00:15:40,135
It's over-the-top
353
00:15:40,204 --> 00:15:44,105
and weird and has more
jazz hands than magic.
354
00:15:44,174 --> 00:15:46,074
Why didn't you say
something earlier?
355
00:15:46,143 --> 00:15:48,677
You seemed like
you were so happy,
356
00:15:48,745 --> 00:15:50,056
and then when I tried
to say something,
357
00:15:50,080 --> 00:15:52,847
you seemed like you were so mad.
358
00:15:52,916 --> 00:15:54,816
Hey, this isn't about me.
359
00:15:54,885 --> 00:15:56,325
I just wanted you
to have your dream,
360
00:15:56,386 --> 00:15:57,986
and I wanted
to control everything
361
00:15:58,055 --> 00:16:01,656
about how you looked and acted
so that your victory was mine.
362
00:16:01,725 --> 00:16:05,694
Well, that's honest.
363
00:16:05,762 --> 00:16:08,163
But if I'm gonna
go through with this,
364
00:16:08,232 --> 00:16:10,031
I have to do it my own way.
365
00:16:10,100 --> 00:16:12,000
I respect that,
366
00:16:12,069 --> 00:16:14,047
and I'm glad that I helped
lead you to this moment.
367
00:16:14,071 --> 00:16:16,471
Stop trying to make this
your victory!
368
00:16:17,908 --> 00:16:19,841
(crowd cheering, whistle blowing
over TV)
369
00:16:29,786 --> 00:16:32,153
Why are you watching that?
370
00:16:32,222 --> 00:16:33,321
I'm just looking to see
371
00:16:33,390 --> 00:16:35,490
if there's anything left
of your speech.
372
00:16:35,559 --> 00:16:38,293
It's not important.
I remember everything I said.
373
00:16:38,362 --> 00:16:40,061
And?
374
00:16:40,130 --> 00:16:43,898
It was good, it just would've
meant more coming from me.
375
00:16:45,769 --> 00:16:48,303
All right, bring it in.
376
00:16:48,372 --> 00:16:49,638
Is that your dad?
377
00:16:49,706 --> 00:16:51,206
It is.
378
00:16:51,275 --> 00:16:53,475
I've only seen pictures of him.
379
00:16:53,543 --> 00:16:56,411
I know we're down, by a lot.
380
00:16:56,480 --> 00:16:58,847
And if I'm being
honest with you,
381
00:16:58,915 --> 00:17:00,915
we're probably not
gonna win this one.
382
00:17:00,984 --> 00:17:05,420
In fact, we're definitely not
gonna win this one.
383
00:17:05,489 --> 00:17:08,189
Do you want me to turn it off?
384
00:17:08,258 --> 00:17:10,659
But we're not
gonna quit, either.
385
00:17:10,727 --> 00:17:11,993
And if we do lose,
386
00:17:12,062 --> 00:17:15,230
you need to know
that doesn't make you losers.
387
00:17:15,299 --> 00:17:19,234
You learn as much about who you
are and what you're made of
388
00:17:19,303 --> 00:17:22,671
from failing as you do
from success.
389
00:17:22,739 --> 00:17:25,674
Maybe more.
390
00:17:25,742 --> 00:17:29,010
So you can spend the next half
feeling sorry for yourselves,
391
00:17:29,079 --> 00:17:31,713
or you can get out there
and give them hell.
392
00:17:31,782 --> 00:17:33,448
Yeah! Let's give them hell!
393
00:17:33,517 --> 00:17:36,751
Oh-- watch your mouth,
your mom might...
394
00:17:36,820 --> 00:17:39,120
I remember that game.
395
00:17:39,189 --> 00:17:41,656
Did they win?
396
00:17:41,725 --> 00:17:43,425
Oh, no.
397
00:17:43,493 --> 00:17:45,026
No, they lost so bad,
the other team
398
00:17:45,095 --> 00:17:49,130
let one of their cheerleaders
try to kick a field goal.
399
00:17:49,199 --> 00:17:52,534
Well, that was a nice speech.
Too bad it didn't work.
400
00:17:52,602 --> 00:17:54,936
Maybe it did.
401
00:17:55,005 --> 00:17:57,539
What do you mean?
402
00:17:57,607 --> 00:17:59,274
I've been acting
like the game is over,
403
00:17:59,343 --> 00:18:01,910
but it's only halftime.
404
00:18:01,978 --> 00:18:04,713
And there's a lot more physics
left to play.
405
00:18:04,781 --> 00:18:09,617
Wow, was that your first ever
sports metaphor?
406
00:18:09,686 --> 00:18:12,687
It was.
407
00:18:12,756 --> 00:18:15,023
And I think it was a home run.
408
00:18:18,195 --> 00:18:20,395
That's two.
409
00:18:20,464 --> 00:18:23,164
It's interesting.
410
00:18:23,233 --> 00:18:26,668
I've always thought that
my father's journey and my own
411
00:18:26,737 --> 00:18:31,973
were so different, but he also
faced failure and setbacks.
412
00:18:32,042 --> 00:18:36,478
Maybe our lives mirrored each
other more than I thought.
413
00:18:36,546 --> 00:18:40,949
So, from one viewpoint,
414
00:18:41,017 --> 00:18:44,319
you and your father's lives
are asymmetrical,
415
00:18:44,388 --> 00:18:49,624
but from another vantage point,
they're symmetrical.
416
00:18:49,693 --> 00:18:51,126
Sheldon,
417
00:18:51,194 --> 00:18:55,463
what if symmetry and asymmetry
are observer-relative?
418
00:18:55,532 --> 00:18:58,867
That would mean that
the Russian paper was right...
419
00:18:58,935 --> 00:19:01,770
But only from one perspective.
420
00:19:01,838 --> 00:19:04,773
If we look at it from a deeper
view in more dimensions,
421
00:19:04,841 --> 00:19:06,708
our theory still stands.
422
00:19:06,777 --> 00:19:10,078
Not only stands, i-it might be
an even bigger idea
423
00:19:10,147 --> 00:19:12,414
than the one we were
originally proposing.
424
00:19:12,482 --> 00:19:14,482
Go get your laptop.
We have a paper to fix.
425
00:19:14,551 --> 00:19:15,551
(chuckles):
Okay.
426
00:19:20,424 --> 00:19:23,958
Thanks, Dad.
427
00:19:24,027 --> 00:19:25,460
We're gonna give them hell.
428
00:19:31,373 --> 00:19:33,473
Hi, I'm The Great Howdini,
429
00:19:33,541 --> 00:19:35,975
and it's an honor to be
auditioning at the Magic Castle.
430
00:19:36,044 --> 00:19:37,844
Could I borrow your watch, sir?
431
00:19:37,912 --> 00:19:39,779
- Sure.
- Thank you.
432
00:19:39,848 --> 00:19:43,483
Ooh, Rolex, fancy.
I'll get it right back to you.
433
00:19:43,551 --> 00:19:47,854
Observe:
one very expensive watch,
434
00:19:47,922 --> 00:19:50,456
one wooden mallet.
435
00:19:52,794 --> 00:19:55,061
Do I dare? I do.
436
00:19:59,200 --> 00:20:02,902
Would you be amazed if your
watch survived that pounding?
437
00:20:02,971 --> 00:20:05,972
I think you would-- behold.
438
00:20:14,037 --> 00:20:21,037
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man
438
00:20:22,305 --> 00:20:28,279
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