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1
00:00:03,271 --> 00:00:06,140
♪
2
00:00:10,311 --> 00:00:11,845
Oh, hi. I'm Betty.
3
00:00:11,845 --> 00:00:14,415
I'm the broker for this listing.
Are you here for the open house?
4
00:00:16,850 --> 00:00:18,652
You put my condo on the market?
5
00:00:18,652 --> 00:00:19,820
[laughing]
6
00:00:19,820 --> 00:00:20,988
Yeah, did a lot of people
show up?
7
00:00:20,988 --> 00:00:22,190
I priced it to move.
8
00:00:22,190 --> 00:00:24,992
Betty from Orbit is very angry.
9
00:00:24,992 --> 00:00:27,095
She kicked over the For sale
sign right in front of me.
10
00:00:27,095 --> 00:00:28,596
Yeah, I interviewed
a lot of brokers
11
00:00:28,596 --> 00:00:30,331
and she was particularly unhinged.
12
00:00:30,331 --> 00:00:31,432
I gave her your cell.
13
00:00:31,432 --> 00:00:32,633
This is totally disproportionate
14
00:00:32,633 --> 00:00:33,701
to my last prank on you.
15
00:00:33,701 --> 00:00:34,702
Are you kidding me?
16
00:00:34,702 --> 00:00:36,804
You made me think I had
a chance with Collette.
17
00:00:36,804 --> 00:00:39,173
You obviously don't have
a chance with Collette
18
00:00:39,173 --> 00:00:40,808
and this could affect
my credit score.
19
00:00:40,808 --> 00:00:42,676
- Uh, hey. Hey guys.
- I hope so.
20
00:00:42,676 --> 00:00:43,944
Can I talk to everyone
really quick?
21
00:00:43,944 --> 00:00:47,181
Retaliation will be outsized
and devastating
22
00:00:47,181 --> 00:00:49,350
and at a time of my choosing.
Ok?
23
00:00:51,018 --> 00:00:51,885
Is that now?
24
00:00:51,885 --> 00:00:52,886
I'm late. I know.
25
00:00:52,886 --> 00:00:55,123
My son stuck a Lucky Charm
up his nose.
26
00:00:56,324 --> 00:00:57,991
Also I slept in.
I'm sorry.
27
00:00:57,991 --> 00:00:59,026
Guys!
28
00:00:59,893 --> 00:01:01,862
I have just received
an intra-department memo
29
00:01:01,862 --> 00:01:05,199
It's pretty serious. An Officer
Whelon from precinct 2.1
30
00:01:05,199 --> 00:01:06,400
was hurt on the job today.
31
00:01:06,400 --> 00:01:07,135
What happened?
32
00:01:07,135 --> 00:01:09,069
Apparently, he stepped on a rake
33
00:01:09,069 --> 00:01:10,571
and then he fractured
his occipital bone.
34
00:01:10,571 --> 00:01:11,539
[Victoria snickers]
35
00:01:11,539 --> 00:01:13,341
Were Moe and Curly anywhere
near the scene?
36
00:01:13,341 --> 00:01:14,074
No.
37
00:01:14,074 --> 00:01:15,209
And was there a coconut sound
38
00:01:15,209 --> 00:01:16,744
when the rake hit him
in the face?
39
00:01:16,744 --> 00:01:17,511
[snickers]
40
00:01:17,511 --> 00:01:18,712
Ok. I just need you all to be
41
00:01:18,712 --> 00:01:20,013
very careful on the job, alright?
42
00:01:20,013 --> 00:01:21,915
Just, please wear your PPE, ok?
43
00:01:21,915 --> 00:01:23,151
Amen, guys.
44
00:01:23,151 --> 00:01:26,220
That's why we should all be
wearing our rake helmets.
45
00:01:26,220 --> 00:01:28,055
Hey. Did you list
your apartment?
46
00:01:30,258 --> 00:01:31,392
What about?
47
00:01:31,392 --> 00:01:34,528
[theme song]
48
00:01:34,528 --> 00:01:58,752
♪
49
00:02:01,589 --> 00:02:03,724
You know, this is
my first weekend
50
00:02:03,724 --> 00:02:05,193
since the breakup with Camila
51
00:02:05,193 --> 00:02:07,428
where I wasn't
completely miserable.
52
00:02:07,428 --> 00:02:08,896
I think I might have
turned a corner.
53
00:02:08,896 --> 00:02:10,931
You know, you don't want
to heal too fast.
54
00:02:10,931 --> 00:02:11,932
There's something to be said
55
00:02:11,932 --> 00:02:18,739
for staying in that sad,
very, very quiet space.
56
00:02:18,739 --> 00:02:20,107
For a couple of months even.
57
00:02:20,107 --> 00:02:22,109
Well, seems like you had
a good weekend.
58
00:02:22,109 --> 00:02:24,144
Kudos on the prank
with Victoria.
59
00:02:24,144 --> 00:02:25,746
Thanks, I didn't get much sleep
60
00:02:25,746 --> 00:02:27,948
'cause I was falsifying
tons of documents.
61
00:02:27,948 --> 00:02:30,318
You guys go at it.
I love the dark flirting.
62
00:02:30,318 --> 00:02:31,252
The what?
63
00:02:31,252 --> 00:02:32,152
Dark flirting.
64
00:02:32,152 --> 00:02:32,953
It's like you have
this love language
65
00:02:32,953 --> 00:02:35,623
of humiliation and revenge.
66
00:02:35,623 --> 00:02:38,792
We're not flirting, we're just
coworkers goofing around
67
00:02:38,792 --> 00:02:40,127
to kill time at the office.
68
00:02:40,127 --> 00:02:42,796
Got it. Totally.
69
00:02:42,796 --> 00:02:46,967
Though the prank did happen
at her condo on a Sunday.
70
00:02:48,969 --> 00:02:49,970
[Dispatch] Truck 12,
71
00:02:49,970 --> 00:02:51,104
report of a noise disturbance
for a peacock
72
00:02:51,104 --> 00:02:53,474
in a residential neighborhood,
1214 Hidden Lane.
73
00:02:54,742 --> 00:02:56,477
Truck 12 responding.
74
00:02:56,477 --> 00:02:57,678
Peacock!
75
00:02:58,912 --> 00:03:00,147
[Patel] I know it's a prank,
76
00:03:00,147 --> 00:03:02,149
but it's not a terrible time
for you to sell.
77
00:03:02,149 --> 00:03:03,016
Oh, really?
78
00:03:03,016 --> 00:03:03,984
Market's gonna soften.
79
00:03:03,984 --> 00:03:05,419
Be a good time
for you to get liquid.
80
00:03:05,419 --> 00:03:06,854
Play in other sectors.
81
00:03:06,854 --> 00:03:08,489
Maybe mix use warehouses.
82
00:03:08,489 --> 00:03:10,691
I'm not sure how much I like
real estate, Patel.
83
00:03:10,691 --> 00:03:12,526
He's always working an angle.
84
00:03:12,526 --> 00:03:14,528
I just don't want you
to miss out.
85
00:03:14,528 --> 00:03:15,529
See? Stuff like that.
86
00:03:15,529 --> 00:03:17,331
How does Maya feel
about real estate, Patel?
87
00:03:17,331 --> 00:03:19,767
Certainly doesn't mind making
a little extra cheddar.
88
00:03:19,767 --> 00:03:20,934
Ugh.
89
00:03:23,337 --> 00:03:25,373
[peacock calls]
90
00:03:25,373 --> 00:03:27,508
Hi. Animal Control.
91
00:03:27,508 --> 00:03:28,442
Yeah.
92
00:03:28,442 --> 00:03:29,677
Three guesses why we're here.
93
00:03:29,677 --> 00:03:31,845
I just put the peacock
in the backyard.
94
00:03:31,845 --> 00:03:33,013
The neighbors complain again?
95
00:03:33,013 --> 00:03:34,715
I told them, all you have to do
is call me
96
00:03:34,715 --> 00:03:35,716
if it gets too loud...
97
00:03:35,716 --> 00:03:37,551
I hope you're here
to confiscate that bird.
98
00:03:37,551 --> 00:03:39,019
Why don't you take it easy, Jen?
99
00:03:39,019 --> 00:03:40,688
You take it easy, Brent.
100
00:03:41,188 --> 00:03:42,189
- Get in the truck.
- Why?
101
00:03:42,189 --> 00:03:43,324
It's about to go south.
102
00:03:43,324 --> 00:03:44,325
They are just people.
103
00:03:44,325 --> 00:03:45,493
They're not people,
they're neighbors.
104
00:03:45,493 --> 00:03:46,694
- Get in the truck.
- [Neighbor] Do something about it!
105
00:03:46,694 --> 00:03:49,697
Ok, folks, I recently got out
of a long-term relationship.
106
00:03:49,697 --> 00:03:51,999
Why didn't it work?
A lot of reasons.
107
00:03:51,999 --> 00:03:53,867
Cultural differences, distance,
108
00:03:53,867 --> 00:03:56,370
but mainly, we talked
past each other.
109
00:03:56,370 --> 00:03:57,871
So let's not do that, ok?
110
00:03:57,871 --> 00:04:00,040
Brent's already said if
the peacock gets too loud
111
00:04:00,040 --> 00:04:01,208
he can just call him.
112
00:04:01,208 --> 00:04:02,376
Well Brent's a liar.
113
00:04:02,376 --> 00:04:04,378
Why don't you say
that again, Ted?
114
00:04:04,378 --> 00:04:05,579
[grunts]
Oh!!!
115
00:04:05,579 --> 00:04:06,880
[Neighbor] That bird's
gotta go!
116
00:04:06,880 --> 00:04:10,217
No, guys!
Everybody calm down!
117
00:04:10,217 --> 00:04:11,885
Stop! I'm telling you to stop.
118
00:04:11,885 --> 00:04:12,720
Oh!
119
00:04:13,186 --> 00:04:14,054
Ughhh!!
120
00:04:14,988 --> 00:04:15,823
Jeez.
121
00:04:17,057 --> 00:04:18,258
You alright?
122
00:04:18,926 --> 00:04:20,093
Melons?
123
00:04:21,929 --> 00:04:23,397
My god, Jen.
124
00:04:30,037 --> 00:04:30,871
Ok.
125
00:04:31,439 --> 00:04:32,840
Really, I'm fine.
126
00:04:32,840 --> 00:04:34,442
This is exactly what
I was worried about.
127
00:04:34,442 --> 00:04:36,209
Shred, I really think you need
to go to the hospital.
128
00:04:36,209 --> 00:04:38,446
They're just gonna tell me
to follow concussion protocols.
129
00:04:38,446 --> 00:04:39,747
I've been through this before.
130
00:04:39,747 --> 00:04:41,715
Rest for 12 hours
and try not to sleep.
131
00:04:41,715 --> 00:04:43,083
Someone should watch him.
132
00:04:43,083 --> 00:04:44,452
Like a partner?
133
00:04:44,452 --> 00:04:46,587
Like one, but not exactly one.
134
00:04:47,087 --> 00:04:48,021
I'll do it.
135
00:04:48,021 --> 00:04:49,390
What are you trying to get
out of at home?
136
00:04:49,390 --> 00:04:50,558
Sixth grader slumber party.
137
00:04:50,558 --> 00:04:52,893
Eight girls, three cliques,
there will be no winners.
138
00:04:52,893 --> 00:04:54,462
Are you gonna take
his care seriously?
139
00:04:54,462 --> 00:04:56,430
Totally. What platforms
you working with?
140
00:04:56,430 --> 00:04:57,731
Xbox, Playstation.
141
00:04:57,731 --> 00:04:59,367
That'll do.
You like Thai food?
142
00:05:00,100 --> 00:05:01,068
Not really.
143
00:05:01,068 --> 00:05:02,035
You're probably
just ordering wrong.
144
00:05:02,035 --> 00:05:03,437
I'll walk you through it.
Let's roll.
145
00:05:05,038 --> 00:05:06,940
Ok, no strobing lights, though!
146
00:05:06,940 --> 00:05:08,075
He's in good hands.
147
00:05:08,075 --> 00:05:09,610
Oh, my gosh.
Dispatch is getting inundated
148
00:05:09,610 --> 00:05:11,311
with complaints
about the peacock.
149
00:05:11,311 --> 00:05:12,913
Can't we just confiscate
the bird?
150
00:05:12,913 --> 00:05:13,947
Good luck.
151
00:05:13,947 --> 00:05:15,248
We can't take the bird
unless it makes noise
152
00:05:15,248 --> 00:05:18,285
for three continuous minutes
and it has to be recorded.
153
00:05:18,285 --> 00:05:20,287
We all know where
this is going, right?
154
00:05:21,321 --> 00:05:22,956
Stakeout.
Like on the force.
155
00:05:22,956 --> 00:05:24,458
Yeah, I always hated
the rampant corruption
156
00:05:24,458 --> 00:05:25,793
but I always loved a stakeout.
157
00:05:25,793 --> 00:05:27,961
A stakeout. Sure.
158
00:05:27,961 --> 00:05:30,664
Um, you should probably team up
with someone on this though.
159
00:05:30,664 --> 00:05:32,466
No. He looks way too excited.
160
00:05:32,466 --> 00:05:34,635
Great. I'll need an unmakes car
with hideaway lights
161
00:05:34,635 --> 00:05:35,636
and a trucker buddy.
162
00:05:35,636 --> 00:05:36,670
I don't know what that is.
163
00:05:36,670 --> 00:05:38,972
Portable urinal.
I'll go change into my streets.
164
00:05:41,108 --> 00:05:41,975
I'm sorry.
165
00:05:41,975 --> 00:05:42,976
No. No, no, no.
166
00:05:42,976 --> 00:05:45,145
He can't just urinate with me
in the car.
167
00:05:45,145 --> 00:05:46,514
I hope he doesn't.
168
00:05:47,981 --> 00:05:50,183
[video game sounds]
169
00:05:50,183 --> 00:05:51,785
[Patel] Dude, watch your six.
Watch your six!
170
00:05:51,785 --> 00:05:53,821
[Shred] I thought you were
watching my six.
171
00:05:53,821 --> 00:05:54,655
You're dead.
172
00:05:54,655 --> 00:05:55,689
My brains are everywhere.
173
00:05:55,689 --> 00:05:57,324
That's a concussion
you don't recover from.
174
00:05:57,324 --> 00:05:58,158
Try the wings.
175
00:05:58,158 --> 00:06:00,027
Ok. I've never had
one of these.
176
00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:03,196
A little spicy.
177
00:06:03,196 --> 00:06:05,165
- Woah! Whoa!! Wait!
- Ride the beast.
178
00:06:05,165 --> 00:06:06,867
- No. This is hot!
- Ride the beast.
179
00:06:06,867 --> 00:06:08,802
- No, I want water, man.
- No! Eat something.
180
00:06:08,802 --> 00:06:10,170
That'll put it out.
181
00:06:10,938 --> 00:06:12,172
The curry's probably
a bad call though.
182
00:06:12,172 --> 00:06:15,308
Ugh! Ow!
Why does this exist, man?!
183
00:06:15,308 --> 00:06:16,777
- That's very spicy.
- Who eats this?
184
00:06:16,777 --> 00:06:19,212
- Eat the rice.
- The Rice? Oh.
185
00:06:21,014 --> 00:06:24,017
You bastard, dude.
It's so hot.
186
00:06:24,017 --> 00:06:24,985
[Patel chuckles]
187
00:06:24,985 --> 00:06:25,886
What the hell?
188
00:06:25,886 --> 00:06:26,687
Wait for it.
189
00:06:26,687 --> 00:06:27,688
For what?
190
00:06:29,557 --> 00:06:33,360
Oh! Whoah!
191
00:06:33,360 --> 00:06:34,695
I feel all buzzy.
192
00:06:34,695 --> 00:06:36,464
That's the endorphins
kicking in.
193
00:06:36,464 --> 00:06:38,365
Your mouth just stuck
a half pipe, bro.
194
00:06:38,365 --> 00:06:39,399
You got anything hotter?
195
00:06:39,399 --> 00:06:41,535
You warrior.
I love it.
196
00:06:41,535 --> 00:06:43,804
Just so you know, there is
a second surge wave coming.
197
00:06:43,804 --> 00:06:45,506
It's gonna hit land
in about six hours.
198
00:06:45,506 --> 00:06:46,373
I'm not worried about it.
199
00:06:46,373 --> 00:06:47,541
You should be.
200
00:06:47,541 --> 00:06:50,878
Shall we clear the Al-Qaeda cell
from downtown Dayton?
201
00:06:50,878 --> 00:06:52,913
Let's show Ohio what is up.
202
00:06:55,315 --> 00:06:57,551
[video game music turns up]
203
00:06:57,551 --> 00:06:59,352
Bro, you need to stay
with me this time.
204
00:06:59,352 --> 00:07:00,554
[knocking]
205
00:07:00,554 --> 00:07:01,755
Are you expecting someone?
206
00:07:01,755 --> 00:07:07,027
No. Protect my guy.
He's fast, but he's not strong.
207
00:07:07,027 --> 00:07:08,161
It's so fun!
208
00:07:10,097 --> 00:07:11,031
Emily?
209
00:07:11,031 --> 00:07:12,733
Hey. Can I come in?
210
00:07:12,733 --> 00:07:14,768
- Of course, yeah. Come on.
- Ok.
211
00:07:16,837 --> 00:07:17,838
[laughing]
212
00:07:17,838 --> 00:07:19,239
I was worried about you.
213
00:07:19,239 --> 00:07:20,340
Why?
214
00:07:20,340 --> 00:07:24,244
Bro! You just got another
traumatic brain injury.
215
00:07:24,244 --> 00:07:26,079
Oh, hey Emily.
216
00:07:26,079 --> 00:07:27,014
[music stops]
217
00:07:27,014 --> 00:07:29,082
Patel! What... loud music?
218
00:07:29,082 --> 00:07:31,251
Bright strobing lights?
Violent images?
219
00:07:31,251 --> 00:07:32,119
Are you kidding me?
220
00:07:32,119 --> 00:07:33,921
What? No, he's fine.
Right, bro?
221
00:07:33,921 --> 00:07:35,455
I think the second wave's
hitting early.
222
00:07:35,455 --> 00:07:36,857
[stomach gurgles]
223
00:07:38,759 --> 00:07:40,260
Thai food.
224
00:07:46,700 --> 00:07:48,602
Ah, journaling your thoughts
with a pen and paper.
225
00:07:48,602 --> 00:07:49,803
That's cute.
226
00:07:49,803 --> 00:07:51,939
I always figured that we're
not of the same generation.
227
00:07:51,939 --> 00:07:53,106
How was the war?
228
00:07:53,106 --> 00:07:55,142
I am logging in my log book.
229
00:07:55,142 --> 00:07:55,943
This is so dumb.
230
00:07:55,943 --> 00:07:56,777
- Time in.
- What?
231
00:07:56,777 --> 00:07:58,612
- Start clocking the squawks.
- Okay.
232
00:07:58,612 --> 00:07:59,647
[peacock calling]
233
00:07:59,647 --> 00:08:00,781
Remember, we need to record
234
00:08:00,781 --> 00:08:02,616
three straight minutes
of squawking for the lawyers.
235
00:08:02,616 --> 00:08:03,884
Man, I love all animals
236
00:08:03,884 --> 00:08:06,554
but what exactly is the upside
to this pet?
237
00:08:07,821 --> 00:08:09,056
Time.
238
00:08:09,056 --> 00:08:10,290
Seven seconds.
239
00:08:10,290 --> 00:08:12,960
Oh. This could be
a very long night.
240
00:08:12,960 --> 00:08:13,827
[sighs]
241
00:08:13,827 --> 00:08:15,629
Oh, we gotta go over
the ground rules.
242
00:08:15,629 --> 00:08:16,964
There's really only one rule,
243
00:08:16,964 --> 00:08:18,832
which is no pranking
on stakeouts.
244
00:08:18,832 --> 00:08:19,967
Why?
245
00:08:19,967 --> 00:08:21,802
It's just a request.
Would you please respect it?
246
00:08:21,802 --> 00:08:22,636
Sure.
247
00:08:25,338 --> 00:08:26,273
You're not gonna respect it.
248
00:08:26,273 --> 00:08:27,908
No, I'm not.
[chuckles]
249
00:08:30,277 --> 00:08:31,178
What are you doing?
250
00:08:31,178 --> 00:08:33,981
Oh my gosh!
A little big jumpy there, Frank.
251
00:08:33,981 --> 00:08:35,649
Don't forget to write that
in your log book.
252
00:08:35,649 --> 00:08:38,318
"8:07PM, Frank has the yips."
253
00:08:38,318 --> 00:08:40,654
Ok. How are you feeling?
254
00:08:40,654 --> 00:08:41,755
I'm really ok.
255
00:08:41,755 --> 00:08:43,757
No headaches or nausea?
256
00:08:43,757 --> 00:08:44,524
Touché!
257
00:08:44,524 --> 00:08:46,159
[Yells] Patel!
258
00:08:46,159 --> 00:08:47,527
[whispers] I'm so sorry.
259
00:08:47,527 --> 00:08:49,496
You are officially fired
as nurse.
260
00:08:49,496 --> 00:08:50,664
Alright, you can go home.
261
00:08:50,664 --> 00:08:52,833
We were actually having fun.
262
00:08:52,833 --> 00:08:53,767
Yeah.
263
00:08:53,767 --> 00:08:55,168
Fun is not the
primary objective.
264
00:08:55,168 --> 00:08:56,536
It's to avoid a seizure.
265
00:08:56,536 --> 00:08:58,271
I'm almost sure I haven't
had a seizure.
266
00:08:58,271 --> 00:09:00,808
Yeah, I'm pretty sure he hasn't
had a seizure.
267
00:09:00,808 --> 00:09:01,875
Definitely not a major one.
268
00:09:01,875 --> 00:09:03,343
Yeah, I, no...
269
00:09:03,343 --> 00:09:06,680
Well, I can take it from here.
I cleared my night.
270
00:09:06,680 --> 00:09:07,881
Oh, wait.
Now I feel bad.
271
00:09:07,881 --> 00:09:09,182
Did you have big plans?
272
00:09:09,182 --> 00:09:10,483
Yeah, I did.
273
00:09:10,483 --> 00:09:13,220
I don't want to go into details,
but they were substantial plans.
274
00:09:13,220 --> 00:09:14,554
That sounds made up.
275
00:09:14,554 --> 00:09:15,689
It's not made up.
276
00:09:15,689 --> 00:09:17,691
Well I can't go home.
The girl's slumber party!
277
00:09:17,691 --> 00:09:20,694
Oh yeah. We've been following
it on social media.
278
00:09:20,694 --> 00:09:22,462
The Kaitlyn and Lucile thing
came to a head
279
00:09:22,462 --> 00:09:23,864
and guess where Rose ended up?
280
00:09:23,864 --> 00:09:25,032
Yep.
281
00:09:25,032 --> 00:09:26,233
- On the outs.
- The outs.
282
00:09:26,233 --> 00:09:28,869
Alright. Well, if you are
going to stay
283
00:09:28,869 --> 00:09:31,538
then we all need to be
mellow and chill.
284
00:09:31,538 --> 00:09:32,372
Ok.
285
00:09:32,372 --> 00:09:33,340
How chill?
286
00:09:33,340 --> 00:09:36,710
Like, um...
Like board game chill.
287
00:09:36,710 --> 00:09:38,712
Sounds great. Shred, go
and prepare the funeral.
288
00:09:38,712 --> 00:09:40,547
- For the buzz?
- For the buzz.
289
00:09:42,650 --> 00:09:43,550
French fry?
290
00:09:43,550 --> 00:09:45,252
Sprinkled with laxatives?
No thanks.
291
00:09:45,252 --> 00:09:46,720
If it was laced with laxatives
292
00:09:46,720 --> 00:09:48,388
wouldn't I have gotten
you your own bag?
293
00:09:48,388 --> 00:09:50,057
You tell me.
The stakeout was really sudden
294
00:09:50,057 --> 00:09:52,359
so you could have a ton
of dangerous ideas in the works
295
00:09:52,359 --> 00:09:53,894
but not had a chance
to think them through.
296
00:09:53,894 --> 00:09:55,062
What is wrong with you?
297
00:09:55,062 --> 00:09:56,496
Why are you so obsessed
with pranks
298
00:09:56,496 --> 00:09:59,199
when being on the receiving end
is clearly torture for you.
299
00:09:59,199 --> 00:10:00,233
I'm not obsessed.
300
00:10:00,233 --> 00:10:01,735
It's just something
I've always done.
301
00:10:01,735 --> 00:10:03,570
Being on the force,
growing up with brothers.
302
00:10:03,570 --> 00:10:05,238
Easy access to fireworks.
303
00:10:05,238 --> 00:10:06,539
It's not my theory.
304
00:10:08,241 --> 00:10:09,076
You got a theory?
305
00:10:09,076 --> 00:10:11,078
I do. It's a simple one,
but yeah.
306
00:10:11,078 --> 00:10:13,246
- Ok.
- You have intimacy issues.
307
00:10:13,246 --> 00:10:14,381
[scoffs]
308
00:10:14,381 --> 00:10:16,283
And pranks are a way to keep
people at arms length.
309
00:10:16,283 --> 00:10:17,450
- Intimacy issues?
- Yeah.
310
00:10:17,450 --> 00:10:19,419
How sad.
It's just pure projection.
311
00:10:19,419 --> 00:10:21,288
It's very lazy police work,
Officer Sands.
312
00:10:21,288 --> 00:10:22,622
Ok, that is not projection.
313
00:10:22,622 --> 00:10:24,624
I get intimate two to three
times a week.
314
00:10:24,624 --> 00:10:26,426
Sometimes more in summer months.
315
00:10:26,426 --> 00:10:27,761
Maybe it's not actual intimacy
316
00:10:27,761 --> 00:10:30,698
and it's just you trying to fill
a bottomless well of need.
317
00:10:30,698 --> 00:10:34,134
Oh, wow.
Kitty got claws.
318
00:10:34,134 --> 00:10:36,937
Look, stakeouts
can get pretty real
319
00:10:36,937 --> 00:10:38,238
and they can be
powerful moments...
320
00:10:38,238 --> 00:10:41,108
Please stop talking.
I don't want to talk.
321
00:10:41,709 --> 00:10:45,312
And I'm freezing.
Doesn't this thing have heat?
322
00:10:46,146 --> 00:10:47,614
Yeah, right here.
323
00:10:49,482 --> 00:10:53,787
[laughing] Got ya!
Oh, my gosh!
324
00:10:56,456 --> 00:10:57,991
[laughing]
325
00:11:02,495 --> 00:11:04,464
That went even better
than planned.
326
00:11:08,568 --> 00:11:10,670
Talc? That's the big prank?
327
00:11:10,670 --> 00:11:11,939
You should see your face.
328
00:11:11,939 --> 00:11:12,806
[camera shutting clicks]
[Victoria laughs]
329
00:11:12,806 --> 00:11:13,907
You know, if I could see it,
330
00:11:13,907 --> 00:11:15,308
it would be a look of
profound disappointment
331
00:11:15,308 --> 00:11:17,144
because, where's
the pageantry?
332
00:11:17,144 --> 00:11:18,178
Where the intricate planning?
333
00:11:18,178 --> 00:11:19,813
There should be bees
coming out of the vent.
334
00:11:19,813 --> 00:11:22,582
Yeah, I know it's old school
but you didn't see it coming.
335
00:11:22,582 --> 00:11:23,984
- [peacock calling]
- Time in. Start the clock.
336
00:11:23,984 --> 00:11:24,985
Here we go.
337
00:11:25,986 --> 00:11:27,154
You're a jackass.
338
00:11:27,988 --> 00:11:29,322
[chuckling]
339
00:11:30,090 --> 00:11:32,325
Ok, this is gonna be
so much fun.
340
00:11:32,325 --> 00:11:34,361
Does everyone have their tea?
341
00:11:34,361 --> 00:11:35,495
Yay.
342
00:11:35,495 --> 00:11:38,431
I am gonna have to call dibs
on this thimble.
343
00:11:38,431 --> 00:11:40,467
Oh. I've always been
a wheelbarrow man.
344
00:11:40,467 --> 00:11:41,869
- Really?
- Mmhmm.
345
00:11:41,869 --> 00:11:43,804
How married are we
to this music?
346
00:11:43,804 --> 00:11:46,706
Yeah, is this, uh, folk?
Elevator folk?
347
00:11:46,706 --> 00:11:48,175
- Is that a thing?
- What is it?
348
00:11:48,175 --> 00:11:50,477
It's a playlist off
the restorative channel.
349
00:11:50,477 --> 00:11:54,514
Well, I'm battling 11 years
of parenting exhaustion
350
00:11:54,514 --> 00:11:56,683
and I'm gonna need
some stimulus here.
351
00:11:56,683 --> 00:11:57,885
Have some tea, bro.
352
00:11:57,885 --> 00:12:00,653
Yeah, get some dandelion
up in you.
353
00:12:00,653 --> 00:12:01,855
- It's good, right?
- It is.
354
00:12:01,855 --> 00:12:03,056
Oh god.
355
00:12:03,056 --> 00:12:04,357
- [peacock calling]
- Just ten more seconds!
356
00:12:04,357 --> 00:12:09,062
2:53, 2:54... 2:55-
357
00:12:10,230 --> 00:12:11,731
Ugh!
358
00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:13,066
You have got to be kidding me.
359
00:12:13,066 --> 00:12:14,534
This bird is good.
360
00:12:16,403 --> 00:12:20,340
Hey, uh, sorry about the
bottomless well of need comment.
361
00:12:20,340 --> 00:12:24,377
I have no business knocking you
for wanting to enjoy your life.
362
00:12:24,377 --> 00:12:28,015
I have fun.
But it does get exhausting.
363
00:12:28,015 --> 00:12:30,483
I've been waking up pretty
wretched the morning after.
364
00:12:30,483 --> 00:12:31,584
That's called a hangover,
365
00:12:31,584 --> 00:12:33,153
and they only get worse
when you get older.
366
00:12:34,554 --> 00:12:37,090
You know, I always give you crap
about your age.
367
00:12:37,090 --> 00:12:38,058
Hm.
368
00:12:38,058 --> 00:12:39,392
But I don't even
see you as old.
369
00:12:40,493 --> 00:12:42,595
Ok. Whatever.
370
00:12:44,331 --> 00:12:45,565
I need caffeine,
371
00:12:45,565 --> 00:12:47,567
so I'm gonna head around
the corner to the gas station
372
00:12:47,567 --> 00:12:48,601
and get us a coffee.
373
00:12:48,601 --> 00:12:50,370
Yeah, yeah that sounds
pretty good, rookie.
374
00:12:51,905 --> 00:12:53,240
[laughs]
375
00:12:56,109 --> 00:12:59,412
Dang. Baltic Ave again.
376
00:12:59,412 --> 00:13:01,448
Oh. Patel, I owe you
more rent.
377
00:13:01,448 --> 00:13:02,449
Patel?
378
00:13:02,449 --> 00:13:03,750
- [snoring]
- Mm.
379
00:13:04,117 --> 00:13:06,253
Hey. Hey.
380
00:13:07,520 --> 00:13:08,922
Ok, he's like totally asleep.
381
00:13:08,922 --> 00:13:12,125
Poor guy ran around like a top
and just tuckered himself out.
382
00:13:12,125 --> 00:13:14,895
You know, he's actually
a really fun guy.
383
00:13:16,596 --> 00:13:18,866
Well, maybe he
can still be fun.
384
00:13:18,866 --> 00:13:19,933
What are you thinking?
385
00:13:19,933 --> 00:13:21,101
Well, I am annoyed at him
386
00:13:21,101 --> 00:13:23,136
that he dropped the ball
on taking care of you
387
00:13:23,136 --> 00:13:27,407
and the depth of his slumber is,
um... an opportunity.
388
00:13:27,407 --> 00:13:30,277
Emily Middle Name Price.
What'd you have in mind?
389
00:13:30,277 --> 00:13:32,045
A big L on the forehead?
390
00:13:33,046 --> 00:13:34,647
You know what?
I'm gonna surprise you.
391
00:13:35,615 --> 00:13:36,984
And you.
392
00:13:41,121 --> 00:13:45,625
Ah... Ugh... Ah...
393
00:13:45,625 --> 00:13:47,294
Oh, come on. Wake up, leg.
Come on.
394
00:13:47,294 --> 00:13:49,329
[alarm sounding]
395
00:13:50,663 --> 00:13:51,932
What?
396
00:13:51,932 --> 00:13:53,300
Are you Ebeneezer Dawkins?
397
00:13:53,300 --> 00:13:55,102
I'm Frank Shaw
with Animal Control.
398
00:13:55,102 --> 00:13:56,103
Do you have some ID?
399
00:13:56,103 --> 00:13:57,170
Sure.
400
00:13:58,638 --> 00:13:59,606
Could you come with me?
401
00:13:59,606 --> 00:14:00,640
What's going on?
402
00:14:00,640 --> 00:14:02,142
Now don't get agitated,
I'm trying to help you.
403
00:14:02,142 --> 00:14:05,979
Ok. Ah, ooh.
There it is again.
404
00:14:05,979 --> 00:14:08,581
Ah! I can't sit for
that long anymore.
405
00:14:08,581 --> 00:14:10,450
There was a silver alert
put out earlier this evening
406
00:14:10,450 --> 00:14:11,651
for an Ebeneezer Dawkins
407
00:14:11,651 --> 00:14:13,820
matching your description
with possible dementia
408
00:14:13,820 --> 00:14:15,488
who wandered off
from a seniors centre.
409
00:14:15,488 --> 00:14:16,957
Just look at my ID.
410
00:14:18,691 --> 00:14:20,827
Yeah, that's you,
Ebeneezer Dawkins.
411
00:14:22,629 --> 00:14:24,965
That... clearly this is
a fake ID.
412
00:14:24,965 --> 00:14:27,667
My partner must have made it.
Do I look 79?
413
00:14:27,667 --> 00:14:29,336
Let me me get you in the light
here, buddy.
414
00:14:30,103 --> 00:14:31,838
Yeah, you're more like,
you know, 60.
415
00:14:31,838 --> 00:14:32,772
What?
416
00:14:32,772 --> 00:14:34,541
[laughing]
417
00:14:34,541 --> 00:14:36,209
That was worth it all.
418
00:14:36,209 --> 00:14:37,510
Hey, what's going on here?
419
00:14:37,510 --> 00:14:39,812
Just a whole lot of gratitude
for first responders like you.
420
00:14:39,812 --> 00:14:41,014
Be careful, it's hot.
421
00:14:41,014 --> 00:14:42,515
That's my partner,
422
00:14:42,515 --> 00:14:44,684
we're Animal Control and clearly
she is pulling a prank.
423
00:14:44,684 --> 00:14:45,986
Oh, you're kidding me?
424
00:14:45,986 --> 00:14:47,687
It's a crime to send out a fake
alert, you know that, right?
425
00:14:47,687 --> 00:14:49,022
I do now.
426
00:14:49,022 --> 00:14:52,192
But I feel like you're probably
gonna let me get away with it.
427
00:14:52,192 --> 00:14:53,193
That's true.
428
00:14:53,193 --> 00:14:54,527
[laughs]
429
00:14:54,527 --> 00:14:55,228
Don't do it again.
430
00:14:55,228 --> 00:14:56,563
Me?
431
00:14:56,563 --> 00:14:58,231
- Bye.
- Good night.
432
00:14:59,299 --> 00:15:00,700
[cell phone chimes]
433
00:15:00,700 --> 00:15:04,337
And now, I am getting texts
from like everyone.
434
00:15:04,337 --> 00:15:06,573
Oh yeah, an alert went out
to the entire state.
435
00:15:06,573 --> 00:15:08,008
Western Canada too.
436
00:15:08,008 --> 00:15:09,409
[laughs]
437
00:15:13,180 --> 00:15:15,748
[peacock calling]
438
00:15:15,748 --> 00:15:16,816
Time.
439
00:15:17,750 --> 00:15:20,253
You gonna be snippy all night
because I bested you?
440
00:15:20,253 --> 00:15:21,154
Time!
441
00:15:22,222 --> 00:15:23,590
A minute, thirty.
442
00:15:23,590 --> 00:15:25,225
- [peacock squealing]
- [crash sounds]
443
00:15:25,225 --> 00:15:26,393
What the hell was that?
444
00:15:42,109 --> 00:15:43,110
[devouring sounds]
445
00:15:44,777 --> 00:15:47,914
It's him. It's C-38.
446
00:15:47,914 --> 00:15:50,183
I think we solved
our peacock problem.
447
00:15:50,183 --> 00:15:52,085
Not the best solution,
because he ate it.
448
00:15:52,085 --> 00:15:53,386
And now we have
to sedate him.
449
00:16:00,193 --> 00:16:01,128
I can't do it.
450
00:16:01,128 --> 00:16:02,295
You're just sedating him.
451
00:16:02,295 --> 00:16:04,931
No, we tranq him
then we have to report it
452
00:16:04,931 --> 00:16:06,199
and that he's been killing pets
453
00:16:06,199 --> 00:16:08,535
in a residential area then
they'll have to destroy him.
454
00:16:08,535 --> 00:16:11,304
Well, he doesn't seem so
un-dangerous right now.
455
00:16:15,142 --> 00:16:15,975
I can't.
456
00:16:15,975 --> 00:16:17,444
[snarling and growling]
457
00:16:17,444 --> 00:16:18,145
[Victoria] Frank!
458
00:16:18,145 --> 00:16:19,279
[gun fires]
459
00:16:24,284 --> 00:16:26,153
That's actually really good.
460
00:16:26,153 --> 00:16:27,787
I can't believe
he didn't wake up.
461
00:16:27,787 --> 00:16:29,456
I kind of want to check
his vitals.
462
00:16:29,456 --> 00:16:31,224
[both laugh]
463
00:16:31,958 --> 00:16:33,626
I was wondering something.
464
00:16:33,626 --> 00:16:34,994
What? What's that?
465
00:16:34,994 --> 00:16:37,564
Do you ever, like,
miss snowboarding?
466
00:16:37,564 --> 00:16:38,798
No.
467
00:16:38,798 --> 00:16:40,267
I mean, I got to do more of it
468
00:16:40,267 --> 00:16:41,634
than most people get to do
in a lifetime,
469
00:16:41,634 --> 00:16:44,104
so how can I complain, right?
470
00:16:44,104 --> 00:16:44,971
And what is it anyway?
471
00:16:44,971 --> 00:16:46,639
You go up a hill in a chair
472
00:16:46,639 --> 00:16:48,641
and then you go back
down the hill.
473
00:16:48,641 --> 00:16:51,010
Except your body's like
a rocket ship
474
00:16:51,010 --> 00:16:52,812
if a rocket ship could surf
475
00:16:52,812 --> 00:16:56,249
and mountains were like
10,000 foot-high waves.
476
00:16:56,249 --> 00:16:58,085
You sound completely
over it, so...
477
00:16:58,085 --> 00:16:59,852
- Yeah.
- That's good. That's good.
478
00:16:59,852 --> 00:17:01,821
[laughs] Yeah. Yeah, no.
I don't miss it at all.
479
00:17:01,821 --> 00:17:04,191
Mmhmm. So, I actually have
one more question for you.
480
00:17:04,191 --> 00:17:05,625
Hm?
481
00:17:05,625 --> 00:17:07,160
Do you have a feather?
482
00:17:07,160 --> 00:17:08,495
Do I have a feather?
483
00:17:17,770 --> 00:17:18,671
I'm sorry.
484
00:17:18,671 --> 00:17:21,007
Heck, you were just trying
to save my life.
485
00:17:21,007 --> 00:17:24,377
Yeah, which you still haven't
said thank you for, by the way.
486
00:17:24,377 --> 00:17:25,278
Hm.
487
00:17:28,281 --> 00:17:30,117
This is really tearing
you up, huh?
488
00:17:30,117 --> 00:17:33,186
Yeah. Not a lot in this world
I admire.
489
00:17:33,186 --> 00:17:36,189
C-38? It's just who he is.
490
00:17:36,189 --> 00:17:39,025
Doesn't apologize,
doesn't compromise.
491
00:17:39,025 --> 00:17:41,994
Just a creature in perfect
harmony with his surroundings.
492
00:17:41,994 --> 00:17:45,031
And then people came
and messed it all up.
493
00:17:46,799 --> 00:17:49,001
It kills me I'm the one
that did him in.
494
00:17:50,970 --> 00:17:52,372
Who's to say you did him in?
495
00:17:56,709 --> 00:17:58,311
I reckon he'll be safe up here.
496
00:18:01,848 --> 00:18:06,052
Wow, in this light you can
really see how muscled he is.
497
00:18:06,052 --> 00:18:07,720
Seriously, if you want
some alone time with him
498
00:18:07,720 --> 00:18:08,988
I can wait in the truck.
499
00:18:12,559 --> 00:18:13,893
He's waking up.
500
00:18:27,106 --> 00:18:28,074
Bye, buddy.
501
00:18:30,543 --> 00:18:32,545
[laughing]
502
00:18:39,118 --> 00:18:40,119
Oh!
503
00:18:44,957 --> 00:18:47,227
Ugh. I'm sorry.
I must have fallen asleep.
504
00:18:47,227 --> 00:18:50,597
Yeah. You were...
you were in and out.
505
00:18:50,597 --> 00:18:52,064
What time is it?
506
00:18:52,064 --> 00:18:53,566
Uh, it's almost midnight.
507
00:18:53,566 --> 00:18:55,134
Oh. I better go relieve Maya.
508
00:18:56,869 --> 00:18:57,804
You ok, man?
509
00:18:57,804 --> 00:19:00,072
Oh, yeah. I'm all good.
510
00:19:00,072 --> 00:19:02,275
Obviously I only came here
to get away from my family
511
00:19:02,275 --> 00:19:05,111
and play with your stuff,
but this was good.
512
00:19:05,111 --> 00:19:06,145
It really was.
513
00:19:06,145 --> 00:19:07,146
And you, Madame Boss Lady,
514
00:19:07,146 --> 00:19:08,615
I'm sorry we gave you
a hard time.
515
00:19:08,615 --> 00:19:10,116
Don't worry about it, Luigi.
516
00:19:11,451 --> 00:19:13,653
Maybe just leave
the jokes to us.
517
00:19:13,653 --> 00:19:15,222
[chuckles]
518
00:19:15,422 --> 00:19:16,256
Yeah.
519
00:19:16,256 --> 00:19:17,957
Alright, I gotta go
lay down the law
520
00:19:17,957 --> 00:19:20,327
with some incredibly
mean-spirited sixth graders.
521
00:19:20,327 --> 00:19:21,461
Good night.
522
00:19:21,728 --> 00:19:22,495
[Emily] Good night.
523
00:19:24,331 --> 00:19:25,465
[both chuckle]
524
00:19:29,802 --> 00:19:31,103
You know that if they find
out about this
525
00:19:31,103 --> 00:19:32,305
we could lose our jobs?
526
00:19:32,305 --> 00:19:33,473
Yeah.
527
00:19:33,473 --> 00:19:36,609
So, here we find ourselves
having to trust each other.
528
00:19:36,609 --> 00:19:39,646
Which I know is hard for you
with the intimacy stuff.
529
00:19:39,646 --> 00:19:41,481
It is a very unnatural feeling.
530
00:19:41,481 --> 00:19:44,351
Maybe we should call it
a truce on the prank war?
531
00:19:44,351 --> 00:19:45,818
- Absolutely.
- Right.
532
00:19:45,818 --> 00:19:46,653
Victoria Sands?
533
00:19:46,653 --> 00:19:47,520
Starting tomorrow.
534
00:19:47,520 --> 00:19:48,921
Ready to talk enlistment?
535
00:19:51,658 --> 00:19:53,159
I'm not even a US citizen.
536
00:19:53,159 --> 00:19:54,361
Oh I don't think
you'll see combat,
537
00:19:54,361 --> 00:19:56,128
but I just want to say,
in advance,
538
00:19:56,128 --> 00:19:57,430
thank you for your service.
539
00:19:58,298 --> 00:20:00,267
Where are you going?
No, don't...
540
00:20:03,002 --> 00:20:04,837
[Shred] You know, I'm actually
kind of jealous
541
00:20:04,837 --> 00:20:05,638
of Patel's moustache.
542
00:20:05,638 --> 00:20:06,539
Do you want one?
543
00:20:06,539 --> 00:20:08,174
Well, I can't seem to grow one
544
00:20:08,174 --> 00:20:09,942
and Camila always
made fun of me for it.
545
00:20:09,942 --> 00:20:12,379
Ok, well the artist
is in session.
546
00:20:12,379 --> 00:20:13,313
Really?
547
00:20:13,313 --> 00:20:14,013
Oh, yes.
548
00:20:14,013 --> 00:20:14,847
Do it.
549
00:20:14,847 --> 00:20:16,716
Ok. Look at you.
550
00:20:16,716 --> 00:20:18,150
Just sit really still
so I don't mess up.
551
00:20:18,150 --> 00:20:18,951
Ok, I'm ready.
552
00:20:18,951 --> 00:20:19,852
This is serious.
553
00:20:21,053 --> 00:20:23,323
You know, I never
asked you.
554
00:20:23,323 --> 00:20:26,693
How did you end up getting
the job at Animal Control?
555
00:20:26,693 --> 00:20:28,160
It's kind of embarrassing.
556
00:20:28,160 --> 00:20:31,664
Uh, I was an administrator
at another precinct
557
00:20:31,664 --> 00:20:33,566
and when Rick got injured,
558
00:20:33,566 --> 00:20:36,536
um, my aunt who works for
the City kind of pushed for me
559
00:20:36,536 --> 00:20:38,037
to get the promotion.
560
00:20:38,037 --> 00:20:40,239
I don't think that makes
you unqualified.
561
00:20:40,239 --> 00:20:42,542
Oh, good, 'cause, you know,
I wasn't worried about that,
562
00:20:42,542 --> 00:20:44,176
but now I am.
563
00:20:44,176 --> 00:20:46,178
No! No, no, no!
Oh, jeez.
564
00:20:46,178 --> 00:20:47,647
No, 'cause you're like
so good at your job.
565
00:20:47,647 --> 00:20:48,715
Oh, yeah.
566
00:20:48,715 --> 00:20:50,383
You're like a natural leader.
For real. Really.
567
00:20:50,383 --> 00:20:51,050
Really?
568
00:20:51,050 --> 00:20:52,419
Yeah, really.
569
00:20:52,419 --> 00:20:54,554
Ok, shut up so I can just
finish this.
570
00:20:54,554 --> 00:20:55,388
Ok.
571
00:20:55,755 --> 00:20:57,223
Alright, it's even.
572
00:20:57,223 --> 00:20:57,924
It's good?
573
00:20:57,924 --> 00:20:59,091
Ok, it's really good.
574
00:20:59,091 --> 00:21:02,028
[romantic music]
575
00:21:02,028 --> 00:21:03,162
[knocking]
576
00:21:04,897 --> 00:21:06,599
Ok. I should get that.
577
00:21:06,599 --> 00:21:07,734
Yeah.
578
00:21:08,568 --> 00:21:11,404
♪
579
00:21:11,404 --> 00:21:13,172
Patel must have
forgotten something.
580
00:21:16,042 --> 00:21:17,276
Surprise.
581
00:21:17,276 --> 00:21:18,177
Camila?
582
00:21:19,078 --> 00:21:20,880
Did you grow a moustache?
583
00:21:22,849 --> 00:21:23,850
[chuckles]
584
00:21:23,900 --> 00:21:28,450
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