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1
00:00:11,645 --> 00:00:15,673
An apparently peaceful
day in Gotham City.
2
00:00:15,849 --> 00:00:17,977
But what is this?
3
00:00:18,151 --> 00:00:21,986
An armored-car holdup
in broad daylight?
4
00:00:22,155 --> 00:00:24,021
Bash those guards.
5
00:00:24,191 --> 00:00:25,659
Heist that cash.
6
00:00:25,993 --> 00:00:29,521
Use your guns. I wanna
hear some noise. Quack.
7
00:00:34,368 --> 00:00:37,668
We're going to be late for that
lecture to the Crime Prevention League.
8
00:00:37,838 --> 00:00:40,398
Sounds like we may pick up
new material for the lecture.
9
00:00:40,574 --> 00:00:44,568
There's nothing like a little
on-the-job research, old chum.
10
00:00:47,314 --> 00:00:51,183
Lift that loot and tote
that cash. Get the loot.
11
00:00:51,385 --> 00:00:54,878
Hurry up. You're supposed to be
crooks, not a bunch of old women.
12
00:01:05,065 --> 00:01:06,931
What are you
buttinskies doing here?
13
00:01:07,100 --> 00:01:10,127
Just a little scholarly
research, Penguin.
14
00:01:12,072 --> 00:01:15,236
Stop. Stop this
outrageous intrusion.
15
00:01:22,382 --> 00:01:24,749
Cease, I say. Cease and desist.
16
00:01:27,354 --> 00:01:29,346
Stop, you bumbling buffoons.
17
00:01:29,489 --> 00:01:31,424
This is legal, I
tell you. It's legal.
18
00:01:31,592 --> 00:01:34,562
Have you heard anything
about legalized thievery, Robin?
19
00:01:34,728 --> 00:01:36,287
Can't say that I have, Batman.
20
00:01:36,463 --> 00:01:39,490
I'll wipe those silly smirks
off your faces in court.
21
00:01:39,666 --> 00:01:43,398
I'll sue you for assault and
battery and aggravated interference.
22
00:01:44,104 --> 00:01:49,566
Tsk. You're witnessing the final
disintegration of a criminal brain, Robin.
23
00:01:49,977 --> 00:01:52,947
Years of outlawry have
taken their inevitable toll.
24
00:01:53,513 --> 00:01:55,778
But he's right about our
being in court, Batman.
25
00:01:56,149 --> 00:02:00,519
We'll be the prosecution's star witnesses
when they try you for armed robbery.
26
00:02:02,322 --> 00:02:04,154
Mother machree.
What's happening?
27
00:02:04,324 --> 00:02:07,089
Nothing now, chief. Lucky
we happened to be passing by.
28
00:02:07,260 --> 00:02:10,594
Oh, no, Batman, 'twasn't
luck. 'Twas a tragedy.
29
00:02:10,764 --> 00:02:12,995
Do your duty, O'Hara.
Slap the handcuffs on them.
30
00:02:13,166 --> 00:02:15,601
They've attacked
these innocent citizens.
31
00:02:15,769 --> 00:02:18,204
Innocent citizens?
32
00:02:18,839 --> 00:02:20,171
What's going on here, chief?
33
00:02:20,340 --> 00:02:23,401
I'm afraid he's right,
Batman. Look around.
34
00:02:27,314 --> 00:02:30,546
Holy CinemaScope.
Penguin making pictures?
35
00:02:32,619 --> 00:02:34,110
That robbery was just a mock-up.
36
00:02:34,287 --> 00:02:37,155
But this permit isn't a
mock-up, Boy Blunderhead.
37
00:02:37,324 --> 00:02:41,728
It's signed and sealed by the Gotham
City Motion Picture Commission.
38
00:02:41,928 --> 00:02:47,492
And I'm gonna sue the city for $10 million
for failure to provide proper protection.
39
00:02:47,668 --> 00:02:51,230
Do you hear that,
Batman? Ten million dollars.
40
00:02:51,438 --> 00:02:52,497
I hear you, Penguin.
41
00:02:52,673 --> 00:02:56,440
And you two are going to
jail for aggravated assault...
42
00:02:56,576 --> 00:02:58,477
and malicious property damage.
43
00:02:58,645 --> 00:03:00,443
Do you hear that, Batman?
44
00:03:00,580 --> 00:03:01,673
Jail.
45
00:03:01,848 --> 00:03:05,148
- Looks like he's got us this time, Robin.
- Like rats in a trap.
46
00:03:07,721 --> 00:03:10,190
But I'm willing to make a deal.
47
00:04:26,733 --> 00:04:31,398
But, Batman, this is a contract for you
and Robin to act in Penguin's picture.
48
00:04:31,571 --> 00:04:32,595
And you've signed it.
49
00:04:32,773 --> 00:04:36,733
Aw, it was blackmail, commissioner.
That bird trapped them into it.
50
00:04:36,910 --> 00:04:39,607
- Not exactly, chief.
- What do you mean, Batman?
51
00:04:39,780 --> 00:04:42,249
I wanted to sign
that contract, Robin.
52
00:04:42,415 --> 00:04:44,350
You knew that robbery
was a fake from the start?
53
00:04:44,551 --> 00:04:47,146
Yes, I saw the movie
equipment as we drove up.
54
00:04:47,320 --> 00:04:49,812
I didn't have time to explain...
55
00:04:49,990 --> 00:04:52,926
but I wanted Penguin to
think that he'd trapped us.
56
00:04:53,093 --> 00:04:54,288
Why, Batman?
57
00:04:54,461 --> 00:04:57,329
When someone like Penguin
sets up a movie company...
58
00:04:57,497 --> 00:05:00,797
you can be sure it's not only
film he's after, commissioner.
59
00:05:00,967 --> 00:05:03,766
- Sure and that's the truth.
- So you signed that contract...
60
00:05:03,937 --> 00:05:06,771
- so we could keep an eye on Penguin.
- Precisely, Robin.
61
00:05:06,940 --> 00:05:11,310
It's the only way we can stay close
to him without arousing his suspicion.
62
00:05:11,478 --> 00:05:14,107
What do you think the
Penguin's planning, Batman?
63
00:05:14,281 --> 00:05:16,648
That's what we'll try to
find out, commissioner.
64
00:05:16,817 --> 00:05:20,811
He's gone to a lot of expense
to establish this film company...
65
00:05:20,987 --> 00:05:25,288
so we can be sure
it's something big.
66
00:05:35,202 --> 00:05:37,171
Where is Marsha,
Queen of Diamonds?
67
00:05:37,337 --> 00:05:39,897
She is two hours
late, Miss Patterson.
68
00:05:40,106 --> 00:05:42,106
We're trying to locate
her, Mr. Penguin.
69
00:05:42,242 --> 00:05:45,235
Well, try harder. Time is
money in the movie business.
70
00:05:45,412 --> 00:05:47,745
- Yes, Mr. Penguin.
- Quack.
71
00:05:50,250 --> 00:05:51,411
Prop Department?
72
00:05:51,618 --> 00:05:54,349
No, Mr. Penguin. This
is the Set Department.
73
00:05:54,521 --> 00:05:56,513
Eh. Prop Department?
74
00:05:56,690 --> 00:05:59,717
Sorry, Mr. Penguin.
This is Publicity.
75
00:05:59,893 --> 00:06:02,021
Prop Department?
76
00:06:03,630 --> 00:06:05,531
Prop Department?
77
00:06:07,033 --> 00:06:10,197
Prop Department?
MAN 3: Yes, Mr. Penguin.
78
00:06:10,370 --> 00:06:12,339
Forgot what I wanted you for.
79
00:06:12,505 --> 00:06:16,203
Oh, yes. Have you ordered
that milk for scene 12 tomorrow?
80
00:06:16,376 --> 00:06:18,504
Yes, sir. The tank
trucks are arriving now.
81
00:06:18,678 --> 00:06:20,271
Twenty-four thousand gallons.
82
00:06:20,447 --> 00:06:22,712
Heh. Good, good, good.
83
00:06:22,883 --> 00:06:24,511
PATTERSON: Mr. Penguin?
84
00:06:24,684 --> 00:06:25,879
Yes, Miss Patterson.
85
00:06:26,052 --> 00:06:27,884
Marsha, Queen of
Diamonds, is here.
86
00:06:28,054 --> 00:06:29,886
Send her in, send her in.
87
00:06:33,059 --> 00:06:36,518
Oh, I see that you're at
your glittering best, my dear.
88
00:06:36,696 --> 00:06:38,460
Thank you, darling.
89
00:06:38,665 --> 00:06:43,103
Now, how do you suggest I get across
this football field you call an office?
90
00:06:43,603 --> 00:06:46,596
Ah, well, just hop into my
Pengy-mobile and ride over.
91
00:06:48,108 --> 00:06:49,440
Ah.
92
00:06:58,385 --> 00:07:00,547
Oh, my, my.
93
00:07:00,720 --> 00:07:05,681
Why, you're even more ravishing
than usual, Martha my darling.
94
00:07:05,825 --> 00:07:07,919
Skip the compliments, darling.
95
00:07:08,094 --> 00:07:10,928
You wouldn't have asked me
here if you didn't want something.
96
00:07:11,097 --> 00:07:12,497
Yes, I do want something.
97
00:07:12,699 --> 00:07:15,259
I want to make
you a millionairess.
98
00:07:15,435 --> 00:07:17,700
How boring. I'm
already a millionairess.
99
00:07:17,837 --> 00:07:22,298
Heh, it's true. Then how would
you like to be a billionairess?
100
00:07:22,475 --> 00:07:25,240
- That's interesting.
- And all you have to do...
101
00:07:25,412 --> 00:07:29,008
is to become my partner in
this motion-picture company.
102
00:07:29,215 --> 00:07:34,153
Oh, come, now, Pengy. You don't really think
there's a billion dollars in filmmaking.
103
00:07:34,321 --> 00:07:37,155
Faugh, this motion-picture
company is just a front.
104
00:07:37,324 --> 00:07:38,417
- A front?
- That's right.
105
00:07:38,591 --> 00:07:40,787
A front? For what? For what?
106
00:07:40,961 --> 00:07:44,227
For the biggest caper ever
to be pulled in Gotham City.
107
00:07:44,364 --> 00:07:47,630
But I need capital, because
this is a very expensive front.
108
00:07:47,801 --> 00:07:50,498
- How much capital?
- Mm, as much as we can get.
109
00:07:50,670 --> 00:07:55,040
About a dozen of those diamonds
that you're wearing as a start.
110
00:07:55,241 --> 00:08:00,043
And for a dozen of my diamonds, I
will be the star of your film, of course.
111
00:08:00,246 --> 00:08:04,149
Well, I was thinking of somebody
with more... With more "waah."
112
00:08:04,317 --> 00:08:08,948
If you're thinking of my diamonds, darling,
you were thinking of me for the star.
113
00:08:09,122 --> 00:08:12,820
The star of my
film is Batman. Heh!
114
00:08:12,993 --> 00:08:14,484
- Batman? Batman?
- Yes.
115
00:08:14,661 --> 00:08:19,190
- How did you get him?
- Oh, well, my usual bit of cunning chicanery.
116
00:08:19,366 --> 00:08:21,164
Along with the Boy Wonder.
117
00:08:21,334 --> 00:08:22,859
How's that for a cool one?
118
00:08:23,036 --> 00:08:25,130
- Very clever.
- Mm?
119
00:08:25,305 --> 00:08:27,797
- Pengy, darling.
- Yeah?
120
00:08:27,974 --> 00:08:31,877
Does Batman have a love scene
with the leading lady in your film?
121
00:08:32,045 --> 00:08:35,846
Why, of course. Who ever heard
of a film without a love scene?
122
00:08:36,016 --> 00:08:38,884
Then I shall be
your leading lady.
123
00:08:39,052 --> 00:08:40,350
Or no diamonds.
124
00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:44,855
I might even be able to get my aunt Hilda
to whip up a love potion for my lipstick.
125
00:08:45,025 --> 00:08:46,994
Your aunt Hilda? Heh!
126
00:08:47,160 --> 00:08:49,925
Is that old witch still
practicing her black magic?
127
00:08:50,096 --> 00:08:51,689
The blackest, darling.
128
00:08:51,865 --> 00:08:55,996
And with her help, I'll finally
get Batman in my power.
129
00:08:56,169 --> 00:08:58,661
Well, that's an additional
bit of chicanery. All right.
130
00:08:58,838 --> 00:09:00,306
- Is it a deal?
- It's a deal.
131
00:09:00,440 --> 00:09:03,501
Ah, good. I wouldn't
mind winning an Oscar.
132
00:09:03,676 --> 00:09:05,838
Heh, an Oscar? Heh!
133
00:09:06,012 --> 00:09:07,412
You don't want one of those.
134
00:09:07,580 --> 00:09:09,412
My dear, if you
play along with me...
135
00:09:09,582 --> 00:09:14,111
you are liable to win the most coveted
award in the entire motion-picture business.
136
00:09:14,320 --> 00:09:16,755
You are liable to win...
137
00:09:16,923 --> 00:09:18,949
a Penguin.
138
00:09:20,560 --> 00:09:23,587
Penguin's script looks
innocent enough, Robin.
139
00:09:23,763 --> 00:09:27,825
An historical spectacle set
in the days of ancient Rome.
140
00:09:27,967 --> 00:09:29,560
But holy miscasts, Batman.
141
00:09:29,736 --> 00:09:33,901
We play a pair of barbarian bandits sentenced
to fight as gladiators in the Coliseum.
142
00:09:34,074 --> 00:09:38,273
Casting us as bandits would appeal
to Penguin's warped sense of humor.
143
00:09:38,445 --> 00:09:41,074
He's sure gonna want us
jumping through hoops, Batman.
144
00:09:41,247 --> 00:09:43,716
And I'm afraid we'll
have to jump, Robin.
145
00:09:43,883 --> 00:09:47,149
At least until we find
out what he's up to.
146
00:09:48,288 --> 00:09:52,123
But we don't have to
make things easy for him.
147
00:09:52,292 --> 00:09:56,229
Take a look at
scene 12, on Page 33.
148
00:10:00,600 --> 00:10:03,627
Gosh, Batman. What a scene.
149
00:10:03,803 --> 00:10:06,967
I think someone connected with the
Gotham City Film Decency League...
150
00:10:07,140 --> 00:10:10,008
should take a look at this
script. What do you think, Robin?
151
00:10:12,078 --> 00:10:13,603
What do you think, Robin?
152
00:10:13,780 --> 00:10:17,080
Oh. I think Penguin's gonna
be in very hot water, Batman.
153
00:10:17,250 --> 00:10:18,411
That's what I think.
154
00:10:26,626 --> 00:10:28,652
This must be it, Robin.
155
00:10:47,347 --> 00:10:51,808
- Holy movie moguls, Batman.
- Penguin's certainly playing his part to the hilt.
156
00:10:55,155 --> 00:10:57,954
Well, if it isn't my
two ham actors.
157
00:10:58,124 --> 00:10:59,990
The only ham here
is wearing a top hat.
158
00:11:00,160 --> 00:11:03,790
Tut-tut, Boy Bungler, we
can't all be great artists.
159
00:11:09,002 --> 00:11:10,664
There it is.
160
00:11:10,837 --> 00:11:15,298
An exact duplicate of the famous
Tyrrhenian baths in ancient Rome.
161
00:11:15,475 --> 00:11:17,205
This is for scene 12, I take it.
162
00:11:17,377 --> 00:11:20,870
- You like that scene, eh, Batman?
- I think it's in very poor taste, Penguin.
163
00:11:21,047 --> 00:11:24,313
Faugh, it's a fantastically
magnificent scene.
164
00:11:24,484 --> 00:11:26,680
- I wrote it myself.
- Obviously.
165
00:11:28,054 --> 00:11:30,387
What's the reason for
the blindfolds, Batman?
166
00:11:30,557 --> 00:11:34,858
The reason is arriving
now, Boy Bromide.
167
00:11:40,400 --> 00:11:41,959
Hello, darling.
168
00:11:42,101 --> 00:11:47,369
Oh, this'll be the most startling
spectacle ever to hit the screen. Ha, ha.
169
00:11:48,007 --> 00:11:54,243
Wardrobe, where is Miss
Marsha's, heh, costume? Heh, heh.
170
00:11:54,414 --> 00:11:56,781
Ah, there it is. Very good.
171
00:11:56,983 --> 00:12:00,613
Ah! Perfect, perfect.
Thank you, thank you.
172
00:12:02,989 --> 00:12:06,551
Are you ready to make history
with this milk bath, my dear?
173
00:12:06,726 --> 00:12:09,787
Ready whenever you are, C.B.
174
00:12:09,996 --> 00:12:12,192
The love potion in
my lipstick is ready too.
175
00:12:15,268 --> 00:12:19,069
Oh. Batman and Robin,
how nice to see you.
176
00:12:19,239 --> 00:12:21,265
You too, Mrs. Cooper.
177
00:12:21,441 --> 00:12:25,503
Could you point out someone
called Mr. Penguin to me?
178
00:12:26,212 --> 00:12:28,306
I am Mr. Penguin, madam.
179
00:12:28,514 --> 00:12:33,384
And I am Mrs. Harriet Cooper of the
Gotham City League of Film Decency.
180
00:12:34,921 --> 00:12:36,446
Film Decency?
181
00:12:36,623 --> 00:12:38,216
What are you doing here, Mrs. C?
182
00:12:38,391 --> 00:12:40,724
We have read your
script, Mr. Penguin.
183
00:12:40,893 --> 00:12:45,922
And we cannot approve the scene
which you apparently are about to shoot.
184
00:12:46,099 --> 00:12:47,795
This is outrageous.
185
00:12:47,967 --> 00:12:50,061
As the leading entrepreneur
of Gotham City...
186
00:12:50,236 --> 00:12:54,833
I will not submit to having one
page of my masterpiece enfeebled.
187
00:12:55,041 --> 00:12:59,308
And we will not submit
to such bullying tones.
188
00:12:59,479 --> 00:13:03,780
Kindly remove your Victorian
mind from my set, Mrs. C.
189
00:13:03,950 --> 00:13:08,684
Only when you remove this
morbid scene from your film.
190
00:13:08,855 --> 00:13:10,483
Think of the children.
191
00:13:10,657 --> 00:13:12,683
I am thinking of the
children, madam.
192
00:13:12,859 --> 00:13:14,919
Look at this. Look at this here.
193
00:13:15,094 --> 00:13:19,156
Twenty-three thousand quarts
of homogenized milk here.
194
00:13:19,332 --> 00:13:21,597
Fortified with vitamin C.
195
00:13:21,768 --> 00:13:26,502
I tell you, this whole scene is
bursting with minerals and vitamins.
196
00:13:26,673 --> 00:13:30,440
This scene is bursting
with other things as well.
197
00:13:30,643 --> 00:13:34,205
Oh, you know, I suspect this is
your doing, masked meddlers.
198
00:13:34,380 --> 00:13:37,976
You're always poking your
proboscis into other people's business.
199
00:13:38,151 --> 00:13:40,484
Decency is everybody's
business, Penguin.
200
00:13:40,653 --> 00:13:43,282
All right. All right,
we will cut the scene.
201
00:13:43,456 --> 00:13:47,086
And instead, we
will do scene 43.
202
00:13:47,226 --> 00:13:48,717
Get ready, Marsha.
203
00:13:48,895 --> 00:13:52,957
And you, Batman, take
your place for scene 43.
204
00:13:55,702 --> 00:13:57,864
Scene 43, that's the one
where you and Marsha...
205
00:13:58,037 --> 00:13:59,972
Yes, I know, Robin.
206
00:14:00,139 --> 00:14:02,472
But I'll have to do it.
207
00:14:11,818 --> 00:14:15,812
I trust you're going to enjoy
this scene, Batman, darling.
208
00:14:15,988 --> 00:14:18,924
I made a bargain with Penguin,
and I never break my word.
209
00:14:19,125 --> 00:14:20,354
Bargain?
210
00:14:20,526 --> 00:14:25,362
Why, half the men in the world would fight
to be kissed by Marsha, Queen of Diamonds.
211
00:14:25,531 --> 00:14:27,659
They certainly wouldn't
have to fight me.
212
00:14:27,834 --> 00:14:30,736
What an appalling lack
of enthusiasm, darling.
213
00:14:30,903 --> 00:14:35,170
But don't worry, I have enough
enthusiasm for both of us.
214
00:14:35,842 --> 00:14:37,538
Lights.
215
00:14:38,044 --> 00:14:39,774
Camera.
216
00:14:40,179 --> 00:14:42,080
Action.
217
00:14:48,087 --> 00:14:50,852
Cut it. That's not good enough.
218
00:14:51,023 --> 00:14:54,187
Batman, I want you to
put some "grah" into it.
219
00:14:54,360 --> 00:14:56,522
We'll do it again
and again and again.
220
00:14:56,696 --> 00:14:58,528
Once is enough,
you feathered fraud.
221
00:14:59,065 --> 00:15:01,261
Tut-tut, Boy Bluenose.
222
00:15:01,434 --> 00:15:05,201
Penguin is a perfectionist. I'll do
it a hundred times if it's necessary.
223
00:15:05,605 --> 00:15:07,870
And it will be necessary.
224
00:15:08,040 --> 00:15:09,099
All right, action.
225
00:15:15,314 --> 00:15:19,445
Oh, Bruce, your lips
are terribly chapped.
226
00:15:19,619 --> 00:15:22,111
It's a mild case of
windburn, Aunt Harriet.
227
00:15:22,288 --> 00:15:25,053
You see, this afternoon, Dick
and I took an open bus tour...
228
00:15:25,224 --> 00:15:27,989
through the Wayne
Animal Sanctuary.
229
00:15:28,194 --> 00:15:31,596
Well, I'm going to get you
some salve for those lips.
230
00:15:31,764 --> 00:15:34,233
Just in case a pretty
girl wants to kiss you.
231
00:15:37,603 --> 00:15:41,233
Boy, I'll bet you'll never wanna kiss
another girl as long as you live, Bruce.
232
00:15:41,407 --> 00:15:44,741
I wouldn't go so far as to say that,
Dick. You're jumping to a rash conclusion.
233
00:15:44,911 --> 00:15:48,211
Aw, you looked like you were
putting up quite a struggle, all right.
234
00:15:48,347 --> 00:15:51,283
I think there was some
kind of potion in her lipstick.
235
00:15:51,451 --> 00:15:55,946
- Potion?
- Yes. I think a love-inducing elixir of some sort.
236
00:15:56,122 --> 00:15:57,954
No wonder your lips are chapped.
237
00:15:58,124 --> 00:16:01,492
It took a great amount of
concentration to combat its effectiveness.
238
00:16:01,661 --> 00:16:04,096
Good. Speaking of
the immediate future...
239
00:16:04,263 --> 00:16:06,960
why do you think Penguin is
shooting tomorrow's scene...
240
00:16:07,133 --> 00:16:09,728
at the Gotham City
Museum of Antiquities?
241
00:16:09,869 --> 00:16:14,170
He claims he wants to use the
museum as a background for his films.
242
00:16:14,340 --> 00:16:18,141
But I suspect he has
something bigger in mind.
243
00:16:18,444 --> 00:16:22,245
Shouldn't we do something? That museum
is full of priceless and irreplaceable art.
244
00:16:22,381 --> 00:16:24,373
I have done something
about it, Dick.
245
00:16:24,550 --> 00:16:27,782
I went to the museum and planted
Bat-homing devices on every object of art.
246
00:16:27,954 --> 00:16:31,322
Ah, Alfred. Have you been keeping
an eye on the Bat-radar scopes?
247
00:16:31,491 --> 00:16:34,984
Yes, sir. And so far the signals
from the Bat-homing devices indicate...
248
00:16:35,161 --> 00:16:37,756
that all the objects of art
are still in the museum.
249
00:16:37,897 --> 00:16:39,331
Hmm.
250
00:16:39,499 --> 00:16:44,767
I suspect some of the objects will
be moved before the night is over.
251
00:16:44,971 --> 00:16:47,270
And we'll know exactly
where Penguin's taken them.
252
00:16:47,406 --> 00:16:50,308
So far, our overall plan is
working like a charm, Bruce.
253
00:16:50,476 --> 00:16:53,378
So far, Dick. So far.
254
00:16:54,981 --> 00:16:57,849
Didn't you think I was magnificent
in that love scene, darling?
255
00:16:58,017 --> 00:17:01,010
Well, you were certainly better
than the potion in that lipstick.
256
00:17:01,187 --> 00:17:03,179
That left Batman
colder than an iceberg.
257
00:17:03,356 --> 00:17:06,520
Yes, Aunt Hilda obviously
forgot to put enough oomph into it.
258
00:17:06,692 --> 00:17:09,821
- Anyway, your plan is working so far.
- What do you mean, so far?
259
00:17:09,996 --> 00:17:12,898
A Penguin plan is
money in the bank.
260
00:17:13,199 --> 00:17:17,227
Money in the bank is no good to us, darling.
Our problem is getting it out of the bank.
261
00:17:17,403 --> 00:17:20,498
Don't worry, it'll be out of the
bank and in our hands soon enough.
262
00:17:20,673 --> 00:17:23,871
You see, stage one
is already in progress.
263
00:17:24,043 --> 00:17:26,740
Right now my men should be
at the Museum of Antiquities.
264
00:17:26,913 --> 00:17:29,314
And stage two is
likewise under control.
265
00:17:29,448 --> 00:17:33,385
Now for stage three. I will need
another love potion from your aunt Hilda.
266
00:17:33,553 --> 00:17:35,954
And one that'll really,
really work this time.
267
00:17:36,122 --> 00:17:37,613
I'll see what I can do, darling.
268
00:17:37,823 --> 00:17:40,816
In the meantime, you'll have
to tell me what stage three is.
269
00:17:42,194 --> 00:17:44,629
- Tell me.
- No, I never trust a woman with a secret.
270
00:17:44,830 --> 00:17:48,597
And if you're nothing else,
Marsha, you're certainly a woman.
271
00:17:48,768 --> 00:17:51,704
A woman with diamonds, darling.
272
00:17:51,871 --> 00:17:54,466
Or would you rather
return my collateral to me?
273
00:17:54,640 --> 00:17:57,838
No, no. That's
extortion, Marsha.
274
00:17:57,977 --> 00:18:02,108
You should know,
darling. You should know.
275
00:18:03,716 --> 00:18:07,244
- Hello, Aunt Hilda.
- Hello, dearie.
276
00:18:09,488 --> 00:18:10,956
What is that?
277
00:18:11,123 --> 00:18:14,218
Mortimer, say hello to Marsha.
278
00:18:17,797 --> 00:18:20,961
Aunt Hilda, have you been
robbing graveyards again?
279
00:18:21,133 --> 00:18:23,432
Oh, no, dearie.
280
00:18:23,603 --> 00:18:25,936
I left off that 20 years ago...
281
00:18:26,105 --> 00:18:29,974
when I was chemistry
professor at Vassar. Until I quit.
282
00:18:30,142 --> 00:18:31,940
Don't you mean
until you were fired?
283
00:18:32,111 --> 00:18:35,604
A term I find most
unappealing, dearie.
284
00:18:35,948 --> 00:18:37,883
Speaking of things
unappealing...
285
00:18:38,017 --> 00:18:39,679
where did you get that?
286
00:18:39,885 --> 00:18:43,117
I left one of the potions
in the caldron overnight...
287
00:18:43,289 --> 00:18:46,623
and next morning,
there was Mortimer.
288
00:18:46,792 --> 00:18:48,192
He's really quite friendly.
289
00:18:50,029 --> 00:18:53,932
How are you doing with your
other potions these days, Aunt Hilda?
290
00:18:54,100 --> 00:18:55,398
Other potions?
291
00:18:55,534 --> 00:18:58,197
That one you put in my
lipstick was a complete failure.
292
00:18:58,404 --> 00:19:01,431
Well, that was because I ran
out of chameleon tongues, dearie.
293
00:19:01,607 --> 00:19:04,975
- But if you want something really strong...
- I do, I do.
294
00:19:05,144 --> 00:19:08,478
I was just about to
whip up one of my bests.
295
00:19:08,648 --> 00:19:11,709
The old toad potion.
296
00:19:11,917 --> 00:19:14,352
My very strongest.
297
00:19:16,222 --> 00:19:18,851
Oh, dear.
298
00:19:19,025 --> 00:19:21,460
I'm afraid I'm out
of old toads too.
299
00:19:22,161 --> 00:19:24,153
Can't you substitute
some new toads?
300
00:19:25,498 --> 00:19:28,366
It would never work, dearie.
301
00:19:28,968 --> 00:19:31,938
We've just got to get
some more old toads.
302
00:19:44,383 --> 00:19:46,750
It doesn't look as if Penguin
took anything, Batman.
303
00:19:46,952 --> 00:19:47,976
No it doesn't, Robin.
304
00:19:48,154 --> 00:19:51,989
All our homing devices
seem to be in place.
305
00:19:52,458 --> 00:19:54,859
But I'm still suspicious, Robin.
306
00:19:55,027 --> 00:19:57,895
Suspicious of what,
Caped Codger?
307
00:19:58,064 --> 00:20:04,061
Don't tell me you're suspicious of the Penguin
tampering with these priceless works of art.
308
00:20:04,236 --> 00:20:06,228
The thought did cross my mind.
309
00:20:06,405 --> 00:20:11,241
What, a great filmmaker like myself stooping
to a petty theft? Why, that's ridiculous.
310
00:20:11,410 --> 00:20:13,675
What's ridiculous is thinking
you're a great filmmaker.
311
00:20:13,846 --> 00:20:16,748
I write the lines around
here, Boy Blowhard.
312
00:20:16,916 --> 00:20:18,407
You stick to the script.
313
00:20:18,784 --> 00:20:21,879
Speaking of which, your
big scene is coming up.
314
00:20:22,054 --> 00:20:25,422
I must see to it that
everything is, heh, prepared.
315
00:20:29,562 --> 00:20:32,396
- Batman, thank heaven you're here.
- What's wrong, Mr. Tamber?
316
00:20:32,565 --> 00:20:36,502
The museum's priceless collection of
15th-century chain-mail armor, it's gone.
317
00:20:36,635 --> 00:20:38,263
That's impossible.
Our Bat-homing...
318
00:20:38,437 --> 00:20:42,135
There is one factor I
could've overlooked, Robin.
319
00:20:42,308 --> 00:20:45,301
The metal alloy in that armor
could've set up a magnetic field...
320
00:20:45,511 --> 00:20:47,412
which blocked our
homing transmission.
321
00:20:47,580 --> 00:20:49,742
You have to get
them back, Batman.
322
00:20:49,915 --> 00:20:54,444
That unique alloy was invented by
the great master Benvenuto Violini.
323
00:20:54,620 --> 00:20:55,644
Violini.
324
00:20:55,821 --> 00:20:58,416
Yes, he made the
chain-mail armor out of it.
325
00:20:58,591 --> 00:21:02,892
We'll try our best, Mr. Tamber. But I
think you should move out of this room.
326
00:21:04,230 --> 00:21:06,222
There could be
some trouble here.
327
00:21:09,835 --> 00:21:12,737
I think Batman has
discovered the missing armor.
328
00:21:12,905 --> 00:21:15,101
We'd better start
this scene early.
329
00:21:15,274 --> 00:21:18,108
All right, Batman,
a light rehearsal.
330
00:21:18,277 --> 00:21:19,973
Action.
331
00:21:20,813 --> 00:21:25,080
I have a strange feeling Penguin is going
to make this a very realistic scene, Robin.
332
00:21:25,251 --> 00:21:28,585
If he wants realism,
we'll give him realism.
333
00:21:30,856 --> 00:21:34,588
Detail, halt. Prepare
to fight. One, two.
334
00:21:42,134 --> 00:21:45,298
That's it. Skewer the
scrofulous scullion.
335
00:21:45,471 --> 00:21:48,168
Spear him like a
cucumber. Quack, quack!
336
00:21:52,211 --> 00:21:55,613
That's not in the script,
Batman. I'm directing this scene.
337
00:21:55,781 --> 00:21:57,977
Maybe we'll get you
in the scene, Penguin.
338
00:22:55,507 --> 00:22:59,239
Those costumed cutups
are slicing my finks to ribbon.
339
00:23:06,452 --> 00:23:08,785
Uh... Quack.
340
00:23:13,525 --> 00:23:15,756
Shield your eyes, Robin.
341
00:23:18,697 --> 00:23:22,691
Ah. Now we'll give those two-bit
actors a piece of real action.
342
00:23:24,536 --> 00:23:28,303
This catapult will hurl you through
the sky and across Gotham City.
343
00:23:28,474 --> 00:23:31,410
I'm sure you'll make a big splash
at the other end of your journey.
344
00:23:33,445 --> 00:23:37,314
And your last moments on Earth
will be recorded for posterity...
345
00:23:37,483 --> 00:23:40,248
by those two cameras that
I've strapped to your legs.
346
00:23:40,419 --> 00:23:42,547
And I'll show the film
at a special premiere...
347
00:23:42,721 --> 00:23:47,386
for the Benefit of the Amalgamated
Crooks of Gotham City.
348
00:23:47,559 --> 00:23:54,090
The In-Flight Motion Pictures Benefit
of Penguin Productions Unlimited.
349
00:23:58,404 --> 00:24:02,967
Good flight, masked missiles. We'll
watch from a better vantage point.
350
00:24:05,477 --> 00:24:07,309
Farewell.29718
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