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1
00:00:12,770 --> 00:00:14,145
Jeannie.
2
00:00:14,313 --> 00:00:16,021
Jeannie, come on out.
3
00:00:16,190 --> 00:00:17,732
Jeannie.
4
00:00:28,494 --> 00:00:30,736
- Good morning, master.
- Good morning, Jeannie.
5
00:00:30,913 --> 00:00:33,238
My, you look handsome
this morning.
6
00:00:33,416 --> 00:00:35,373
Thank you.
I'd like to ask a favour of you.
7
00:00:35,543 --> 00:00:37,167
Oh, thank you, master!
8
00:00:37,336 --> 00:00:39,874
- You haven't heard what it is yet.
- It does not matter.
9
00:00:40,047 --> 00:00:41,755
You never let me do
anything for you.
10
00:00:41,924 --> 00:00:44,462
Oh, well, this is not exactly for me.
It's for Roger.
11
00:00:44,635 --> 00:00:46,462
He's got a birthday
coming up next week.
12
00:00:46,637 --> 00:00:49,638
- I want to give him a surprise party.
- Oh, I love surprises.
13
00:00:49,807 --> 00:00:53,093
Yeah, yeah, I know. I've invited
a few of his friends over here...
14
00:00:53,269 --> 00:00:55,641
...and I'll keep him at the base
as long as possible.
15
00:00:55,813 --> 00:00:57,521
I don't want him to suspect anything.
16
00:00:58,107 --> 00:01:00,265
What is it
you want me to do, master?
17
00:01:00,443 --> 00:01:02,815
Well, I haven't had any time
to plan for the party.
18
00:01:02,987 --> 00:01:05,359
I want something different,
you know.
19
00:01:05,698 --> 00:01:08,818
We used to have some wonderful
parties in the old days.
20
00:01:08,993 --> 00:01:11,069
Yeah, I'll bet you did.
21
00:01:11,245 --> 00:01:14,199
I was wondering if you could
come up with an idea for the party.
22
00:01:14,373 --> 00:01:15,868
Yes!
23
00:01:16,500 --> 00:01:18,956
I remember a party that Nero gave.
24
00:01:19,128 --> 00:01:22,378
Yeah, well, no, I don't want
anything quite that extravagant.
25
00:02:24,527 --> 00:02:26,436
Hi there, fella.
26
00:02:33,286 --> 00:02:35,409
Hey, you're a mean-looking thing,
aren't you?
27
00:02:37,957 --> 00:02:39,368
You're having a circus.
28
00:02:39,542 --> 00:02:41,618
Oh, Dr. Bellows.
29
00:02:41,794 --> 00:02:45,459
Would you mind telling me
what that's doing here, major?
30
00:02:45,631 --> 00:02:47,956
Yes, I suppose it does seem strange.
31
00:02:48,134 --> 00:02:49,758
No, no.
32
00:02:49,927 --> 00:02:53,343
Doesn't everyone have a tiger
in his living room?
33
00:02:53,514 --> 00:02:56,219
You see, Roger's having-
He has a birthday coming up...
34
00:02:56,392 --> 00:02:58,883
...and I wanted to do something
special for him.
35
00:02:59,061 --> 00:03:01,599
Feed him to the tiger?
36
00:03:02,732 --> 00:03:04,107
No, no, you see...
37
00:03:04,901 --> 00:03:07,226
Well, I just want to give him
a surprise party.
38
00:03:07,403 --> 00:03:10,523
Something like, well,
like Nero used to do, you know.
39
00:03:10,698 --> 00:03:13,652
I not only don't know,
I'm sorry I asked.
40
00:03:13,868 --> 00:03:16,323
General Peterson wants to see you
and Major Healey...
41
00:03:16,495 --> 00:03:18,488
- ... in the computer room at 11:00.
- Yes, sir.
42
00:03:18,664 --> 00:03:21,451
And come alone.
43
00:03:28,674 --> 00:03:31,924
Jeannie. Jeannie.
44
00:03:32,094 --> 00:03:35,012
Jeannie, where are you? Come on.
Jeannie.
45
00:03:35,181 --> 00:03:37,470
Would you mind, please?
46
00:03:38,434 --> 00:03:39,679
Thank you.
47
00:03:39,852 --> 00:03:41,263
Thank you, thank you very much.
48
00:03:41,437 --> 00:03:44,224
I think we'd better
think of something a little simpler.
49
00:03:44,398 --> 00:03:46,023
Oh, yes, master.
50
00:03:46,192 --> 00:03:49,525
Oh, it must be wonderful to have
someone give you a birthday party.
51
00:03:49,904 --> 00:03:52,858
You should know. You must have
had hundreds- Thousands of them.
52
00:03:53,032 --> 00:03:55,867
Oh, I have never had
a birthday party, master.
53
00:03:56,035 --> 00:03:58,787
You haven't had-?
Well, how can that be?
54
00:03:58,955 --> 00:04:01,327
I do not know when my birthday is.
55
00:04:01,499 --> 00:04:03,041
Well, I think that's terrible.
56
00:04:04,210 --> 00:04:07,709
Well, it is a strange feeling
not to know when you were born.
57
00:04:08,130 --> 00:04:10,206
It usually does not bother me...
58
00:04:10,383 --> 00:04:13,834
...but when I see someone else
is having a birthday, I...
59
00:04:14,262 --> 00:04:17,346
...I do wish I knew when mine was.
60
00:04:18,099 --> 00:04:19,344
I'll tell you what.
61
00:04:19,517 --> 00:04:21,842
Why don't you celebrate
Roger's birthday with him.
62
00:04:22,019 --> 00:04:25,388
- We'll make that your birthday party.
- Oh, no, thank you, master.
63
00:04:25,565 --> 00:04:27,059
It would not be the same thing.
64
00:04:27,233 --> 00:04:29,309
I would like to have a birthday
of my very own.
65
00:04:29,485 --> 00:04:31,276
- Yeah.
- Oh, do not worry about it.
66
00:04:31,445 --> 00:04:33,272
- Forget I ever mentioned it.
- No, I won't.
67
00:04:33,447 --> 00:04:36,152
- I'll find out when your birthday is.
- Well, how?
68
00:04:37,159 --> 00:04:38,951
Go home and ask your mother.
69
00:04:39,120 --> 00:04:42,453
Oh, but it was so long ago, master.
70
00:04:42,623 --> 00:04:44,082
She may have forgotten.
71
00:04:44,250 --> 00:04:47,535
Believe me, mothers always
remember birthdays.
72
00:04:47,712 --> 00:04:49,870
- You really think so?
- Yes, yes.
73
00:04:50,047 --> 00:04:52,882
I tell you what you do.
You go find out when your birthday is.
74
00:04:53,050 --> 00:04:56,254
Come back and tell me and
I'll give you the best birthday party...
75
00:04:56,429 --> 00:05:01,506
- ... anybody ever saw in Cocoa Beach.
- Oh, you are wonderful, master!
76
00:05:02,059 --> 00:05:06,638
Oh, I am so happy. Now I'm going
to be just like everybody else.
77
00:05:06,814 --> 00:05:09,222
Yes, well, maybe. Have a good trip.
78
00:05:09,400 --> 00:05:11,476
Oh, thank you, master.
79
00:05:11,652 --> 00:05:15,946
- Oh, goodbye, master.
- Goodbye.
80
00:05:57,573 --> 00:05:59,649
- Hi, Tony.
- Oh, hi, Roge.
81
00:05:59,825 --> 00:06:02,067
Where's- Where's Jeannie?
82
00:06:02,245 --> 00:06:04,237
Jeannie? Oh, she went home
to her mother.
83
00:06:04,413 --> 00:06:05,991
Home to her mother?
You two quarrel?
84
00:06:06,165 --> 00:06:08,656
No, no, she went home to find out
when her birthday was.
85
00:06:08,834 --> 00:06:10,708
- You mean she doesn't know?
- No.
86
00:06:10,878 --> 00:06:12,538
No, when she gets back
and tells me...
87
00:06:12,713 --> 00:06:15,465
...I'll give her a party she won't forget.
You wanna help me?
88
00:06:15,633 --> 00:06:18,468
Okay, you pay for the candles,
I'll pay for the party.
89
00:06:18,844 --> 00:06:20,089
Come in.
90
00:06:20,263 --> 00:06:22,635
- Good morning, gentlemen.
- Good morning, sir.
91
00:06:22,807 --> 00:06:24,301
If you're ready...
92
00:06:24,475 --> 00:06:27,227
- ... General Peterson's waiting.
- Would you mind telling me...
93
00:06:27,395 --> 00:06:29,186
- ... what this is all about?
- Not at all.
94
00:06:29,355 --> 00:06:31,976
General Peterson
wants you to meet ERIC.
95
00:06:32,858 --> 00:06:35,646
ERIC? You mean
this whole room is ERIC?
96
00:06:35,820 --> 00:06:37,611
" Electronic Rapid Input Computer. "
97
00:06:37,780 --> 00:06:40,567
This is the fastest computing machine
in existence.
98
00:06:40,741 --> 00:06:43,030
It can figure out the answer
to any question.
99
00:06:43,202 --> 00:06:46,536
Wonder if it can tell me about the
redhead I have a date with Saturday.
100
00:06:46,706 --> 00:06:50,869
Don't press your luck, Major Healey.
That machine cost five million dollars.
101
00:06:52,128 --> 00:06:54,037
I wanted you both
to know it's available...
102
00:06:54,213 --> 00:06:56,621
...to help you solve any problems
you may run into.
103
00:06:56,799 --> 00:06:58,957
There's the control panel,
here's the manual.
104
00:06:59,135 --> 00:07:01,626
Thank you, sir.
I'm sure ERIC will be a great help.
105
00:07:01,804 --> 00:07:04,509
If you need it, let me know.
I'll have Captain Reynolds...
106
00:07:04,682 --> 00:07:07,138
- ... program it for you.
- Yes, sir.
107
00:07:07,560 --> 00:07:10,929
Five million dollars.
How about that, huh?
108
00:07:12,607 --> 00:07:14,398
You little devil.
109
00:07:14,567 --> 00:07:17,651
I bet you could tell me about that
redhead I have a date with, huh?
110
00:07:18,446 --> 00:07:19,774
Roger, I've been thinking.
111
00:07:19,947 --> 00:07:22,438
If ERIC could give us the ratios
on this input chart...
112
00:07:22,617 --> 00:07:26,116
- ... we could save about a week's work.
- What'll they think of next?
113
00:07:27,163 --> 00:07:28,787
Master, I am back.
114
00:07:28,956 --> 00:07:31,079
Oh, hi, Jeannie.
Did you have a nice trip?
115
00:07:31,250 --> 00:07:33,658
- Nice trip, master.
- Did you see your mother?
116
00:07:33,836 --> 00:07:35,117
- Yes, master.
- How is she?
117
00:07:35,296 --> 00:07:37,419
Oh, she is fine, thank you.
118
00:07:37,590 --> 00:07:39,748
Did you find out the day
you were born?
119
00:07:39,926 --> 00:07:42,595
My mother says I was born
in February, master.
120
00:07:42,762 --> 00:07:44,920
February? You're an Aquarius.
121
00:07:45,097 --> 00:07:46,640
Yeah, what day in February?
122
00:07:46,807 --> 00:07:49,974
It does not matter, master. My father
says I was born in December.
123
00:07:50,144 --> 00:07:52,350
He remembers the icicles
hanging from the roof.
124
00:07:52,521 --> 00:07:54,099
My sister says it was in June...
125
00:07:54,273 --> 00:07:56,764
...because she remembers
picking roses to bring to me.
126
00:07:56,943 --> 00:08:00,394
Our next-door neighbour swears
it was in October.
127
00:08:00,571 --> 00:08:04,486
Oh, it was so long ago,
nobody remembers what month it was.
128
00:08:04,659 --> 00:08:06,865
You mean, there's no clue at all?
129
00:08:07,036 --> 00:08:11,615
All anyone is sure of is that Neptune
was in Scorpio when I was born.
130
00:08:11,791 --> 00:08:15,041
- Neptune was in what?
- Those are astrological signs.
131
00:08:15,211 --> 00:08:16,622
Weren't there any records kept?
132
00:08:17,421 --> 00:08:18,619
- Records?
- Yeah.
133
00:08:18,798 --> 00:08:21,799
Usually when a child is born,
there's some kind of a record kept.
134
00:08:21,968 --> 00:08:24,375
Wasn't there the equivalent
of a Hall of Records?
135
00:08:25,429 --> 00:08:27,173
Of course. I remember now.
136
00:08:27,348 --> 00:08:29,471
The Emperor Caligula
had everything removed...
137
00:08:29,642 --> 00:08:31,385
...to the courthouse of ancient Rome.
138
00:08:31,561 --> 00:08:34,597
Oh, it will be there.
Oh, you are brilliant, master.
139
00:08:34,772 --> 00:08:36,812
I will be right back.
140
00:08:38,317 --> 00:08:42,730
You know, I'm generally not too fond
of genies, but she's an exception.
141
00:08:52,498 --> 00:08:54,621
Good evening, master.
142
00:08:54,792 --> 00:08:58,126
Good evening, Jeannie. Say,
I was beginning to worry about you.
143
00:08:58,296 --> 00:09:00,787
- Did you find the records?
- No, master.
144
00:09:00,965 --> 00:09:03,836
The Hall of Records burned down
during the great fire of '64...
145
00:09:04,010 --> 00:09:05,504
...when Rome burned.
146
00:09:05,678 --> 00:09:08,050
Oh, while Nero fiddled.
147
00:09:08,222 --> 00:09:10,014
How did you know that?
148
00:09:10,182 --> 00:09:11,593
Well, never mind.
149
00:09:11,767 --> 00:09:13,594
Say, Jeannie, I'll tell you what.
150
00:09:13,769 --> 00:09:17,020
Why don't we just pick a day
and celebrate that as your birthday?
151
00:09:17,189 --> 00:09:20,393
No, master.
I want my own birthday.
152
00:09:20,568 --> 00:09:21,979
Yeah, well, I know.
153
00:09:22,153 --> 00:09:26,482
When we can't find out what it is,
you have to pick the next best thing.
154
00:09:27,199 --> 00:09:30,450
No, master.
I do not want the next best thing.
155
00:09:30,620 --> 00:09:32,162
I want the best thing.
156
00:09:32,330 --> 00:09:34,369
- Yes, yes, I know, but-
- My own birthday.
157
00:09:34,540 --> 00:09:37,624
Jeannie, look, well,
I just can't get it for you, that's all.
158
00:09:37,793 --> 00:09:40,000
- It's humanly impossible.
- You are my master.
159
00:09:40,171 --> 00:09:42,413
If you cared for me,
you would find my birthday.
160
00:09:42,590 --> 00:09:46,338
- Yeah, but how?
- Oh, you will think of something.
161
00:09:46,510 --> 00:09:48,550
Good night, master.
162
00:09:50,223 --> 00:09:53,010
How do I get myself
into these things?
163
00:09:54,936 --> 00:09:56,560
Come in!
164
00:09:56,729 --> 00:09:58,223
- Hi.
- Oh, hi, Tony.
165
00:09:58,397 --> 00:10:00,556
- What brings you here?
- I need your help.
166
00:10:00,733 --> 00:10:02,856
Oh, my help?
Well, is anything wrong?
167
00:10:03,027 --> 00:10:05,483
Jeannie couldn't find
the records on her birthday.
168
00:10:05,655 --> 00:10:06,900
That's too bad, Tony.
169
00:10:07,073 --> 00:10:10,323
She expects me to find out when her
birthday was. It was 2000 years ago.
170
00:10:10,493 --> 00:10:12,569
Well, you came to the
right man for advice.
171
00:10:12,745 --> 00:10:14,239
- You know what to do?
- Of course.
172
00:10:14,413 --> 00:10:16,323
- What?
- Lie to her.
173
00:10:16,916 --> 00:10:19,407
Pick a day.
She'll never know the difference.
174
00:10:19,585 --> 00:10:21,044
- I couldn't do that.
- Why not?
175
00:10:21,212 --> 00:10:22,410
Well, it wouldn't be right.
176
00:10:22,588 --> 00:10:24,462
Well, if your conscience
bothers you...
177
00:10:24,632 --> 00:10:26,423
...tell her you just picked a day.
178
00:10:26,592 --> 00:10:28,384
I already did.
I gave her your birthday.
179
00:10:28,553 --> 00:10:30,925
- What did she say?
- Well, she wants her own birthday.
180
00:10:31,097 --> 00:10:33,385
- Help me, will you?
- Help you pick out a date...
181
00:10:33,558 --> 00:10:36,594
...that happened 2000 years ago?
What do you think I am, ERIC?
182
00:10:36,769 --> 00:10:38,263
That's it.
183
00:10:38,604 --> 00:10:41,439
- What's it? I'm ERIC?
- No, ERIC'll help me solve the problem.
184
00:10:41,732 --> 00:10:43,108
What are you talking about?
185
00:10:43,276 --> 00:10:46,395
ERIC only operates if you feed it
information, and we don't have any!
186
00:10:46,571 --> 00:10:50,948
Sure we do, sure we do. We know
that Neptune was in what? Scorpio?
187
00:10:51,117 --> 00:10:52,944
Was in Scorpio
the day she was born.
188
00:10:53,119 --> 00:10:56,120
- What kind of clue is that?
- Well, it's the only one we've got.
189
00:10:56,289 --> 00:10:58,862
Neptune's been
in Scorpio millions of times.
190
00:10:59,959 --> 00:11:01,916
Well, once, maybe.
191
00:11:02,086 --> 00:11:04,126
But we know she was born
about 2000 years ago.
192
00:11:04,297 --> 00:11:06,123
That narrows it down.
193
00:11:06,299 --> 00:11:10,795
And if General Peterson finds us
fooling with ERIC, he'll narrow us down.
194
00:11:10,970 --> 00:11:13,212
It's the only way to find
the date. You with me?
195
00:11:13,723 --> 00:11:16,178
Okay, I'm with you. Boy.
196
00:11:16,350 --> 00:11:18,722
Well, I guess we sink together.
197
00:11:20,646 --> 00:11:24,015
- This is wax.
- Yeah, they're all wax.
198
00:11:28,487 --> 00:11:31,157
- Good morning, Roge.
- I'm afraid you'll have to sink alone.
199
00:11:31,324 --> 00:11:33,779
- What do you mean?
- Can I come in?
200
00:11:33,951 --> 00:11:36,158
Oh, sure, come on in.
201
00:11:36,329 --> 00:11:38,238
Boy, I couldn't sleep at all last night.
202
00:11:38,414 --> 00:11:41,201
- I can't go through with this.
- Go through with what?
203
00:11:41,375 --> 00:11:42,620
ERIC!
204
00:11:42,793 --> 00:11:45,166
If we're caught with it,
we'll get wiped out.
205
00:11:45,338 --> 00:11:47,081
Jeannie will forget
about her birthday.
206
00:11:47,256 --> 00:11:49,415
- I'm not so sure.
- I know women better than you.
207
00:11:49,592 --> 00:11:51,834
What's life and death today
is forgotten tomorrow.
208
00:11:52,011 --> 00:11:54,217
Yeah, well, I hope you're right.
209
00:12:04,440 --> 00:12:05,685
What are you doing?
210
00:12:05,858 --> 00:12:07,566
Oh, forgive me, master.
211
00:12:07,735 --> 00:12:10,440
But whenever I get unhappy,
my powers weaken.
212
00:12:10,613 --> 00:12:14,361
Yeah, well, that vase cost a lot.
I paid a lot of money for that.
213
00:12:14,533 --> 00:12:17,534
Oh, do not worry, master.
I will get you another one.
214
00:12:19,080 --> 00:12:21,915
- What is that?
- A Christmas present for Dr. Bellows.
215
00:12:22,083 --> 00:12:24,704
- Oh, forgive me, master.
- Oh, boy.
216
00:12:24,877 --> 00:12:27,547
Oh, if you can only find out
when my birthday is...
217
00:12:27,713 --> 00:12:30,383
Well, I'm afraid it happened
a long time ago, Jeannie.
218
00:12:30,550 --> 00:12:32,341
What are you-?
What are you doing?
219
00:12:32,510 --> 00:12:34,052
Doing?
220
00:12:34,387 --> 00:12:37,637
I don't want to be rude or anything,
but one of your feet is missing.
221
00:12:39,141 --> 00:12:41,051
- Oh, it's happening!
- What's happening?
222
00:12:41,561 --> 00:12:44,348
Oh, whenever I am very unhappy
I begin to vanish.
223
00:12:44,522 --> 00:12:46,396
- To vanish?
- Vanish?
224
00:12:46,566 --> 00:12:49,187
- Yes.
- Jeannie, you stop that right now.
225
00:12:49,360 --> 00:12:51,068
I cannot help it, master.
226
00:12:51,237 --> 00:12:52,482
Goodbye.
227
00:12:52,655 --> 00:12:54,446
- Goodbye?
- Goodbye?
228
00:12:58,828 --> 00:13:01,283
Now, don't fade away.
This is your master talking.
229
00:13:01,455 --> 00:13:04,907
I cannot help it, master.
If I am unhappy, I just fade.
230
00:13:05,084 --> 00:13:07,657
Well, you get happy, I mean it.
I mean right now!
231
00:13:07,837 --> 00:13:10,292
You think that's the right way
to handle this problem?
232
00:13:10,464 --> 00:13:12,955
Oh, yeah, yeah,
you're absolutely right.
233
00:13:13,134 --> 00:13:15,091
Let's think of happy things,
shall we?
234
00:13:16,012 --> 00:13:18,966
Oh, yes, yes, master.
I do not want to vanish.
235
00:13:20,057 --> 00:13:22,216
Now, what about the picnic we had?
236
00:13:23,227 --> 00:13:25,220
Yes, that that was a lovely day.
237
00:13:25,396 --> 00:13:27,887
Remember, in the museum,
when you found your slippers?
238
00:13:28,774 --> 00:13:31,182
Yes, I enjoyed that.
239
00:13:34,614 --> 00:13:37,568
Hey, hey, one of her feet's back.
240
00:13:37,742 --> 00:13:38,940
Hey, how about that?
241
00:13:39,118 --> 00:13:40,826
Now what about the time when...
242
00:13:40,995 --> 00:13:45,621
...I stuffed the Blue Djinn in the
vacuum, and you got rid of him. Remember?
243
00:13:45,917 --> 00:13:49,332
Yes, oh, that was funny.
I could never forget that, master.
244
00:13:50,296 --> 00:13:53,131
Hey, both her feet are back!
245
00:13:53,299 --> 00:13:54,877
Thank you, master.
246
00:13:55,051 --> 00:13:56,924
Just keep thinking
happy thoughts, okay?
247
00:13:57,094 --> 00:13:58,968
- I will, I will.
- Good girl.
248
00:13:59,138 --> 00:14:00,597
Who needs a birthday, anyway?
249
00:14:02,683 --> 00:14:05,768
- Oh, no!
- Nice work, Roger.
250
00:14:05,937 --> 00:14:08,475
- I was only-
- I can feel myself vanishing again.
251
00:14:08,648 --> 00:14:10,724
- Hold on, Jeannie.
- I'm afraid I cannot stay...
252
00:14:10,900 --> 00:14:12,442
...if I do not know my birthday.
253
00:14:12,610 --> 00:14:14,270
We're gonna find out your birthday.
254
00:14:14,445 --> 00:14:16,402
I thought you said there was no way.
255
00:14:16,572 --> 00:14:18,316
Well, we have a way.
256
00:14:18,491 --> 00:14:21,824
- Yes, it's known as a suicide mission.
- Jeannie, just hold on.
257
00:14:21,994 --> 00:14:24,485
- Give us a little time.
- I will try, master.
258
00:14:24,664 --> 00:14:26,656
- Just think about when-
- Don't say a word.
259
00:14:26,832 --> 00:14:28,492
- I was only-
- Not a word, come on.
260
00:14:28,668 --> 00:14:30,874
- Can I ask you where we're going?
- To see ERIC.
261
00:14:31,045 --> 00:14:32,587
- Can I say one word?
- What's that?
262
00:14:32,755 --> 00:14:34,166
Help.
263
00:14:36,968 --> 00:14:38,378
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
264
00:14:38,553 --> 00:14:40,344
You know what'll happen
if we're caught?
265
00:14:40,513 --> 00:14:42,340
Don't think about it.
266
00:14:42,848 --> 00:14:44,047
That's easy for you to say.
267
00:14:44,225 --> 00:14:47,641
Roger, I want you to stay out here
and warn me if anybody comes.
268
00:14:47,812 --> 00:14:50,303
Yeah, I'll give you
two sharp whistles.
269
00:14:54,110 --> 00:14:57,146
- What is it?
- I was just practicing.
270
00:14:58,531 --> 00:15:00,108
Sorry.
271
00:16:20,196 --> 00:16:23,150
Tony. Tony?
272
00:16:24,784 --> 00:16:27,453
- What are you doing here?
- What am I doing? Will you hurry?
273
00:16:27,620 --> 00:16:30,823
- You've been in here over an hour.
- Well, I'm almost through.
274
00:16:30,998 --> 00:16:32,790
- Do you know what you're doing?
- Yeah.
275
00:16:32,959 --> 00:16:36,125
I hope ERIC knows what he's doing.
I'm feeding him the information.
276
00:16:36,295 --> 00:16:39,747
- I ought to have the answer in a minute.
- If you ask me, he looks stupid.
277
00:16:39,924 --> 00:16:42,130
I said if you ask me, he looks stupid!
278
00:16:42,301 --> 00:16:44,175
Would you go out
and guard the door?
279
00:16:44,345 --> 00:16:46,136
- Yeah. Two sharp whistles.
- Right.
280
00:16:46,305 --> 00:16:48,179
- Two.
- Okay.
281
00:17:00,486 --> 00:17:02,277
Major Healey?
282
00:17:02,446 --> 00:17:03,905
- Yes, sir?
- Are you all right?
283
00:17:04,073 --> 00:17:06,315
It's a friend of mine
that I'm worried about.
284
00:17:06,492 --> 00:17:08,401
- Anyone I know?
- Well, not exactly, sir.
285
00:17:08,578 --> 00:17:11,911
See, I have a 15-year-old cousin
and she fell in love with the milkman.
286
00:17:12,081 --> 00:17:14,370
The family made her
stop drinking milk altogether.
287
00:17:14,542 --> 00:17:18,587
And that became a malnutrition
problem. Of course- Dr. Bellows?
288
00:17:23,551 --> 00:17:25,508
- Well, I think we've done it.
- Do you?
289
00:17:25,678 --> 00:17:29,842
Yes, yes. Oh, hello, Dr. Bellows.
What are you doing here, sir?
290
00:17:30,016 --> 00:17:34,096
The question is, what are you doing
with this machine, Major Nelson?
291
00:17:34,270 --> 00:17:36,346
- What machine, sir?
- That machine.
292
00:17:36,522 --> 00:17:38,894
Oh, ERIC, I think of him as human.
293
00:17:39,066 --> 00:17:41,854
- Thanks a lot, Roger.
- You haven't answered my question.
294
00:17:42,028 --> 00:17:43,937
- What question's that?
- What are you doing?
295
00:17:44,113 --> 00:17:46,900
I was feeding it some information.
I'm trying to find a date.
296
00:17:47,074 --> 00:17:50,526
If he doesn't find the date, a certain
thing he's got going could disappear.
297
00:17:50,703 --> 00:17:52,826
I see, you're computing
a launch date.
298
00:17:53,581 --> 00:17:56,072
- Yes, you might say that.
- Is the machine being helpful?
299
00:17:56,250 --> 00:17:57,709
I certainly hope so, sir.
300
00:17:57,877 --> 00:18:01,460
Well, I think General Peterson will be
very pleased that you're using it.
301
00:18:02,006 --> 00:18:05,209
Yes, sir, he'll get a real kick out of it.
302
00:18:05,384 --> 00:18:08,255
- You had no trouble programming it?
- No, sir.
303
00:18:08,429 --> 00:18:11,383
Good. Well, I'll leave you
to your work.
304
00:18:11,557 --> 00:18:13,550
Thank you, sir.
305
00:18:14,560 --> 00:18:17,134
Oh, no, not- Not now.
306
00:18:17,313 --> 00:18:19,389
You're getting a readout.
May I see it?
307
00:18:19,565 --> 00:18:21,107
- Sir?
- I said, may I see it?
308
00:18:21,275 --> 00:18:23,647
I don't think it'll be
interesting to you, sir.
309
00:18:23,819 --> 00:18:26,820
Oh, I'm fascinated
by these machines. May I?
310
00:18:26,989 --> 00:18:31,069
- Oh, all right, here you are.
- No, no, no, the entire slip.
311
00:18:31,244 --> 00:18:34,862
You were born in the year 64 B.C.
312
00:18:35,039 --> 00:18:36,782
Sixty-four B.C.
313
00:18:36,958 --> 00:18:38,500
What kind of data is that?
314
00:18:38,668 --> 00:18:41,622
Oh, well, I must have fed it
some wrong information.
315
00:18:41,796 --> 00:18:45,331
- Or it had a case of indigestion.
- Does it say anything else?
316
00:18:45,508 --> 00:18:47,547
Yes, it gives a birth date.
317
00:18:47,718 --> 00:18:49,426
- It does?
- May I have the date, sir?
318
00:18:49,595 --> 00:18:54,008
Major Nelson, if you think ERIC
is a Chinese fortune cookie...
319
00:18:54,183 --> 00:18:55,761
...you're very much mistaken.
320
00:18:56,227 --> 00:18:58,303
In future, if you want
to use this machine...
321
00:18:58,479 --> 00:19:00,685
...Captain Reynolds
will program it for you.
322
00:19:00,856 --> 00:19:02,315
- Is that clear?
- I'll just hold-
323
00:19:02,483 --> 00:19:05,021
- I said, is that clear?
- Yes.
324
00:19:05,194 --> 00:19:07,270
Would you mind giving me
the date, sir?
325
00:19:07,446 --> 00:19:09,071
As a matter of fact, I would.
326
00:19:09,240 --> 00:19:12,609
Now, if you gentlemen are through
with your games...
327
00:19:16,497 --> 00:19:19,451
Gotta do this all over again.
328
00:19:20,668 --> 00:19:22,411
Major Nelson!
329
00:19:23,504 --> 00:19:25,248
- What is it?
- Major Nelson!
330
00:19:25,423 --> 00:19:26,621
Yes, sir?
331
00:19:26,799 --> 00:19:29,800
- Do you understand what I said?
- Yes, sir.
332
00:19:29,969 --> 00:19:31,712
Sorry, sir.
333
00:19:37,476 --> 00:19:39,967
I had it in my hand.
I had the date right in my hand.
334
00:19:40,146 --> 00:19:41,344
Do you understand that?
335
00:19:41,522 --> 00:19:44,013
We could've knocked him down
and taken it away from him.
336
00:19:44,191 --> 00:19:46,979
Good thinking, yeah, that's great.
337
00:19:47,153 --> 00:19:49,359
Master, I came to say goodbye.
338
00:19:49,530 --> 00:19:52,401
Goodbye? You can't go, Jeannie.
339
00:19:52,575 --> 00:19:54,614
Looks like she's half gone already.
340
00:19:54,785 --> 00:19:58,735
Oh, I am sorry, master,
but when I'm unhappy, I just-
341
00:19:58,915 --> 00:20:00,539
I have no control over this.
342
00:20:00,708 --> 00:20:03,199
Remember when I found you
in the bottle on the beach...
343
00:20:03,377 --> 00:20:04,622
...and you were so happy?
344
00:20:04,795 --> 00:20:07,333
It's no use, master.
I am slipping away.
345
00:20:07,506 --> 00:20:10,507
Remember the time
I let you drive my car, remember?
346
00:20:10,676 --> 00:20:13,002
Do not forget me, master, please.
347
00:20:13,554 --> 00:20:16,176
Major Nelson's using ERIC
to find out somebody's birthday?
348
00:20:16,349 --> 00:20:17,594
I was there, sir.
349
00:20:17,767 --> 00:20:20,222
- Why would he do that?
- I have no idea, general.
350
00:20:20,394 --> 00:20:22,434
- Maybe we should ask ERIC.
- What?
351
00:20:22,605 --> 00:20:24,763
Oh, nothing, sir.
352
00:20:24,941 --> 00:20:29,768
This is the date the machine gave him.
He seemed most anxious to have it.
353
00:20:29,946 --> 00:20:34,193
- My mother was born on that day.
- But not in 64 B.C.
354
00:20:34,367 --> 00:20:36,027
- Sixty-four B.C.?
- Yes, sir.
355
00:20:36,202 --> 00:20:38,775
The person they were looking up
was born in that year.
356
00:20:38,955 --> 00:20:40,663
Sounds to me
like ERIC had a breakdown.
357
00:20:40,831 --> 00:20:42,990
That's what they tried to claim.
No, general.
358
00:20:43,167 --> 00:20:45,836
There's something behind this.
359
00:20:46,003 --> 00:20:50,712
For some reason, this date
is most important to Major Nelson.
360
00:20:50,883 --> 00:20:53,553
- But he didn't say why?
- No, sir.
361
00:20:53,719 --> 00:20:55,629
I told him to stay away from ERIC...
362
00:20:55,805 --> 00:20:58,722
...unless Captain Reynolds was there
to program his questions.
363
00:20:59,141 --> 00:21:01,549
- I want you to rescind that order.
- But why, sir?
364
00:21:02,103 --> 00:21:05,803
Let Major Nelson use the machine any
time he wants, only he'll be watched.
365
00:21:06,357 --> 00:21:10,355
That's an excellent idea, sir.
He's going to Alaska for two weeks.
366
00:21:10,528 --> 00:21:13,280
I'll tell him when he returns
that ERIC is available to him.
367
00:21:13,447 --> 00:21:17,445
The next time it gives him information,
I want it sent directly to me.
368
00:21:17,618 --> 00:21:20,074
I don't want Major Nelson to see it.
369
00:21:21,080 --> 00:21:24,164
- Amazing.
- What's amazing?
370
00:21:24,333 --> 00:21:29,291
That it took a five-million-dollar
computer to catch Major Nelson.
371
00:21:29,922 --> 00:21:32,247
A moonlight ride in the park.
372
00:21:32,425 --> 00:21:34,713
A chocolate ice cream soda.
373
00:21:34,886 --> 00:21:37,423
The time you suspended me
over a pit of crocodiles.
374
00:21:37,597 --> 00:21:39,340
That's funny.
375
00:21:39,515 --> 00:21:42,469
Remember the time you blinked me
to the South Pole?
376
00:21:42,685 --> 00:21:44,843
Wonderful. You happy now?
377
00:21:45,021 --> 00:21:46,978
No, master.
378
00:21:47,398 --> 00:21:49,438
I'm sorry I ever had a birthday.
379
00:21:49,609 --> 00:21:51,518
Jeannie, have I ever lied to you?
380
00:21:52,111 --> 00:21:55,527
- Yes, master.
- Well, I'm gonna make you a promise.
381
00:21:55,698 --> 00:21:58,948
If you'll just hold on, I'll find
your birthday, your real birthday.
382
00:21:59,327 --> 00:22:00,785
I will try, master.
383
00:22:00,953 --> 00:22:03,242
Good girl. Now you just pop
back to your bottle...
384
00:22:03,414 --> 00:22:06,119
- ... and I'll see you home tonight.
- Yes, master.
385
00:22:11,422 --> 00:22:13,165
What's the matter?
386
00:22:14,383 --> 00:22:15,878
I'm losing my power.
387
00:22:16,052 --> 00:22:18,091
You mean
you can't get out of the office?
388
00:22:18,262 --> 00:22:20,006
- No.
- Well, you can't stay here.
389
00:22:20,181 --> 00:22:22,423
- You're not government issue.
- What shall I do?
390
00:22:22,600 --> 00:22:25,269
Oh, here, get into...
391
00:22:25,811 --> 00:22:29,311
- Get in here, right in here. Come on.
- I will try, master.
392
00:22:30,608 --> 00:22:33,277
Good afternoon, sergeant.
Are you feeling better? Good.
393
00:22:33,444 --> 00:22:35,069
Jeannie.
394
00:22:36,447 --> 00:22:38,321
Jeannie? Jeannie?
395
00:22:38,491 --> 00:22:42,191
- Where are you, Jeannie?
- Here I am, master.
396
00:22:42,370 --> 00:22:44,327
Are you all right, Jeannie?
397
00:22:44,956 --> 00:22:47,494
- I think so.
- Good. You just stay right there.
398
00:22:47,667 --> 00:22:50,502
Everything is gonna be fine.
Hello, Dr. Bellows.
399
00:22:50,670 --> 00:22:51,998
Dr. Bellows.
400
00:22:52,171 --> 00:22:53,879
- Is your desk all right?
- Yes, fine.
401
00:22:54,840 --> 00:22:56,632
Yeah, well, you know,
a desk is a desk.
402
00:22:57,051 --> 00:23:00,337
Yes. I just came in to tell you
that when you return from Alaska...
403
00:23:00,513 --> 00:23:02,755
...you can have free access
to ERIC again.
404
00:23:03,432 --> 00:23:06,268
- That's wonderful, sir.
- You'll be leaving in the morning?
405
00:23:06,435 --> 00:23:07,680
Yes, yes.
406
00:23:07,853 --> 00:23:10,345
They're painting my office,
so while you're gone...
407
00:23:10,523 --> 00:23:13,974
...if you don't mind,
I'll be using this office.
408
00:23:14,151 --> 00:23:15,943
Oh, good, good.
409
00:23:30,751 --> 00:23:32,709
What are we going to do, master?
410
00:23:33,296 --> 00:23:36,415
We have to find out your birthday
before Dr. Bellows moves in.
411
00:23:37,884 --> 00:23:39,426
- Hi, Tony.
- Hi, Roge.
412
00:23:39,594 --> 00:23:42,713
Brought you a glass of milk
and a doughnut.
413
00:23:42,889 --> 00:23:44,881
A glass of milk and a doughnut,
what for?
414
00:23:45,057 --> 00:23:48,142
What for? At a time like this,
you've got to keep up your strength.
415
00:23:48,603 --> 00:23:49,931
I guess you're right.
416
00:23:50,104 --> 00:23:52,393
- Well, let's get going.
- Get going where?
417
00:23:52,565 --> 00:23:54,107
- To see ERIC.
- Wait a minute.
418
00:23:54,275 --> 00:23:57,027
I hate to sound like a pessimist,
but this seems like a trap.
419
00:23:57,194 --> 00:23:59,816
Well, it can't be helped, Roger.
ERIC's our only chance.
420
00:23:59,989 --> 00:24:03,903
And besides, look at the kid.
She's really fading away.
421
00:24:04,076 --> 00:24:05,405
Good luck, master.
422
00:24:05,995 --> 00:24:07,489
Thank you, Jeannie.
423
00:24:07,663 --> 00:24:09,241
- And Jeannie?
- Yes?
424
00:24:09,415 --> 00:24:11,242
Whenever it is...
425
00:24:11,918 --> 00:24:13,578
...happy birthday.
34294
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