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1
00:00:00,401 --> 00:00:01,301
me playing )
2
00:00:01,302 --> 00:00:02,942
HANNAH:
Bambi, Stephanie.
3
00:00:02,937 --> 00:00:04,337
Stephanie, Bambi.
4
00:00:04,338 --> 00:00:05,568
[imitates gunfire]
5
00:00:05,573 --> 00:00:07,643
Vanessa is entitled
to be pissed off at me.
6
00:00:07,641 --> 00:00:08,911
And to insist
you move out of London.
7
00:00:08,909 --> 00:00:10,709
How's, uh, prostitution?
8
00:00:10,711 --> 00:00:12,311
The last time I rang you
to make an appointment,
9
00:00:12,313 --> 00:00:13,953
I got another girl.
10
00:00:13,948 --> 00:00:15,548
It's just I'd rather see you
than your replacement.
11
00:00:15,549 --> 00:00:16,679
What girl?
12
00:00:16,684 --> 00:00:17,794
What do you do?
13
00:00:17,785 --> 00:00:20,715
I'm a nighttime
legal secretary.
14
00:00:20,721 --> 00:00:23,891
I'm with this guy,
and he's gone really weird.
15
00:00:23,891 --> 00:00:25,261
Are you all right?
I'm sorry.
16
00:00:25,259 --> 00:00:27,159
I'm sorry about everything.
17
00:00:27,161 --> 00:00:28,161
It's okay.
18
00:00:28,162 --> 00:00:29,162
It's okay, come here.
19
00:00:29,163 --> 00:00:30,263
It's all right.
20
00:00:35,302 --> 00:00:39,842
Saturday afternoon
at the movies.
21
00:00:39,840 --> 00:00:43,680
A real girlfriend going
on a real date.
22
00:00:45,346 --> 00:00:47,846
I'm just not sure
if that's me.
23
00:00:47,848 --> 00:00:50,318
( upbeat horn theme playing )
24
00:01:23,918 --> 00:01:28,018
You see, this is why
I don't do relationships.
25
00:01:28,022 --> 00:01:30,192
"Dates."
I don't understand the rules.
26
00:01:30,191 --> 00:01:31,631
Who's in charge?
27
00:01:31,625 --> 00:01:32,785
Who pays?
28
00:01:32,793 --> 00:01:35,133
Lucky.
Last two tickets.
29
00:01:35,129 --> 00:01:36,759
So, uh, what are
we gonna see again?
30
00:01:36,764 --> 00:01:39,704
It's a French-Canadian
documentary about Alzheimer's.
31
00:01:39,700 --> 00:01:42,170
It's hilarious.
32
00:01:42,169 --> 00:01:44,869
Really?
No, no, it's a comedy.
33
00:01:44,872 --> 00:01:46,172
Time Out calls it
the perfect date movie,
34
00:01:46,173 --> 00:01:47,943
so no pressure.
Whoa.
35
00:01:47,942 --> 00:01:49,182
( chuckles )
36
00:01:49,176 --> 00:01:50,606
I've never seen a movie
without Will Ferrell
37
00:01:50,611 --> 00:01:52,011
or a talking dog before.
38
00:01:52,012 --> 00:01:53,652
Oh, I'm touched.
You should be.
39
00:01:53,647 --> 00:01:55,417
Can I, uh, pay you
for the tickets?
40
00:01:55,416 --> 00:01:57,076
No, no, no, of course not.
Well, can I go halves?
41
00:01:57,084 --> 00:01:58,194
No, no, put it away.
No, please.
42
00:01:58,185 --> 00:01:59,215
Oops.
( coins clink )
43
00:01:59,220 --> 00:02:01,520
Hannah.
Oh, shit.
44
00:02:01,522 --> 00:02:02,792
( intercom buzzes )
45
00:02:02,790 --> 00:02:05,660
My 12:30, Tony.
46
00:02:05,659 --> 00:02:07,499
He also wants a girlfriend.
47
00:02:07,495 --> 00:02:09,595
The GFE.
48
00:02:09,597 --> 00:02:12,197
The girlfriend experience:
90 minutes,
49
00:02:12,199 --> 00:02:16,269
400 pounds worth of chat,
and cuddles.
50
00:02:16,270 --> 00:02:17,640
I know it doesn't
make sense,
51
00:02:17,638 --> 00:02:20,708
but somehow
this is easier.
52
00:02:20,708 --> 00:02:23,208
This is the kind of girlfriend
I can be.
53
00:02:23,210 --> 00:02:24,880
( jazzy theme playing )
54
00:02:24,879 --> 00:02:26,749
Christ, sorry I'm late.
55
00:02:26,747 --> 00:02:28,347
Total 'mare
at the office.
56
00:02:28,349 --> 00:02:29,449
I know.
57
00:02:29,450 --> 00:02:32,190
You should have seen
the FTSE 100 this morning.
58
00:02:32,186 --> 00:02:33,216
Up, down, buy...
59
00:02:33,220 --> 00:02:34,220
( device beeps )
...sell.
60
00:02:34,221 --> 00:02:36,861
Take the piss
all you want.
61
00:02:36,857 --> 00:02:38,387
You know you still
love us City boys.
62
00:02:38,392 --> 00:02:39,562
Yeah, it's strange,
isn't it?
63
00:02:39,560 --> 00:02:41,400
It must be that sense
of self-importance.
64
00:02:41,395 --> 00:02:42,695
( chuckles )
65
00:02:42,696 --> 00:02:44,866
Cheeky bint.
66
00:02:44,865 --> 00:02:46,195
Mm.
67
00:02:46,200 --> 00:02:48,270
You didn't tell me
you got a pay rise.
68
00:02:48,269 --> 00:02:50,399
Yeah, a guy in mergers
put me onto his tailor.
69
00:02:50,404 --> 00:02:51,414
No, it's lovely.
70
00:02:51,405 --> 00:02:52,405
Thank you.
71
00:02:52,406 --> 00:02:54,166
Yeah, he's a brilliant bloke.
72
00:02:54,174 --> 00:02:56,414
Trained Savile Row,
works out of Camden.
73
00:02:56,410 --> 00:02:58,380
TONY:
Not cheap though.
74
00:02:58,379 --> 00:03:00,449
Well, the best things
never are.
75
00:03:00,447 --> 00:03:01,447
( chuckles )
76
00:03:07,421 --> 00:03:09,991
HANNAH:
Men like Tony,
77
00:03:09,990 --> 00:03:12,660
they don't have time
for a real relationship,
78
00:03:12,660 --> 00:03:16,400
with their six-figure salaries
and their 70-hour working weeks.
79
00:03:16,397 --> 00:03:19,097
They don't want to come home
to PMT in a dressing gown
80
00:03:19,099 --> 00:03:21,669
and a gluten intolerance.
81
00:03:21,669 --> 00:03:23,199
Me,
82
00:03:23,203 --> 00:03:26,373
I'll eat anything.
83
00:03:26,373 --> 00:03:27,543
( breathing heavily )
84
00:03:27,541 --> 00:03:28,811
Oh.
85
00:03:28,809 --> 00:03:30,809
( jazzy theme playing )
86
00:03:42,022 --> 00:03:44,432
Okay.
Okay, go.
87
00:03:46,193 --> 00:03:48,203
( breathing heavily )
88
00:03:51,532 --> 00:03:53,632
( moaning )
89
00:03:53,634 --> 00:03:55,404
Ah.
90
00:03:55,402 --> 00:03:57,172
No.
91
00:03:57,171 --> 00:03:58,671
Oh.
92
00:03:58,672 --> 00:04:01,812
( panting )
93
00:04:01,809 --> 00:04:02,909
Oh.
94
00:04:07,281 --> 00:04:09,281
( intercom buzzes )
95
00:04:13,754 --> 00:04:15,324
Hello?
96
00:04:15,322 --> 00:04:16,622
I want to talk to you.
97
00:04:16,624 --> 00:04:18,534
I'm--I'm sorry,
but who is this?
98
00:04:18,525 --> 00:04:19,925
Let me in
or I will scream,
99
00:04:19,927 --> 00:04:22,657
and I will tell every single
person in this building
100
00:04:22,663 --> 00:04:25,803
that you're fucking
my husband.
101
00:04:25,799 --> 00:04:28,269
I'm sorry.
I have no idea who you are.
102
00:04:28,268 --> 00:04:29,898
I'm his wife.
103
00:04:29,903 --> 00:04:31,243
I'm Matt's wife.
104
00:04:31,238 --> 00:04:32,508
Matt?
105
00:04:32,506 --> 00:04:33,906
My husband.
106
00:04:33,907 --> 00:04:35,307
The man you're
sleeping with?
107
00:04:35,309 --> 00:04:37,339
I'm really sorry, but--
I followed him.
108
00:04:37,344 --> 00:04:39,914
I saw him press your number.
He was here.
109
00:04:39,913 --> 00:04:42,123
I don't know who you mean.
He just left five minutes ago.
110
00:04:42,116 --> 00:04:46,516
Don't--
Don't lie to me.
111
00:04:46,520 --> 00:04:47,520
Tony?
112
00:04:47,521 --> 00:04:49,391
Tony?
113
00:04:49,390 --> 00:04:52,130
Is that what
he calls himself?
114
00:04:53,160 --> 00:04:55,400
He's Matt,
Matt Hexton,
115
00:04:55,396 --> 00:04:56,526
and he's married.
116
00:04:56,530 --> 00:04:57,930
Did he tell you that?
117
00:04:57,931 --> 00:05:00,701
No. No, I don't suppose
he told you much.
118
00:05:00,701 --> 00:05:03,141
Too busy shagging!
Shh, please.
119
00:05:03,137 --> 00:05:04,737
What? They know what you do,
don't they?
120
00:05:04,738 --> 00:05:07,068
Your neighbors?
They know you wreck marriages.
121
00:05:07,074 --> 00:05:09,344
Right, just go.
Oh, no, I'm not going anywhere.
122
00:05:09,343 --> 00:05:11,783
Tell me, how long have
you been having an affair?
123
00:05:11,779 --> 00:05:13,409
We're not having an affair.
124
00:05:13,414 --> 00:05:14,854
He was here for over an hour.
I was outside.
125
00:05:14,848 --> 00:05:16,778
You have to go.
I can't help you.
126
00:05:16,784 --> 00:05:18,754
I was timing you!
127
00:05:18,752 --> 00:05:21,892
What were you doing
if you weren't having sex?
128
00:05:21,889 --> 00:05:25,089
Any problem you have
with your husband--
129
00:05:25,092 --> 00:05:26,462
Yes, you said it.
He's my husband.
130
00:05:26,460 --> 00:05:27,490
Yes, I know.
131
00:05:27,494 --> 00:05:29,604
Then what are you
doing with him?
132
00:05:33,934 --> 00:05:36,144
We have an arrangement.
133
00:05:36,136 --> 00:05:38,666
What? What are you--?
What are you talking about?
134
00:05:38,672 --> 00:05:40,942
I'm not in love
with your husband.
135
00:05:40,941 --> 00:05:43,181
I have no feelings
for him whatsoever.
136
00:05:43,177 --> 00:05:44,777
He--
137
00:05:44,778 --> 00:05:48,118
He pays me.
138
00:05:48,115 --> 00:05:49,945
For my services.
139
00:05:54,288 --> 00:05:56,158
Oh, God.
Oh, no.
Come through here.
140
00:05:56,156 --> 00:05:57,726
( gagging )
141
00:05:57,725 --> 00:05:59,255
( coughing )
Come on.
142
00:06:00,828 --> 00:06:02,828
( retching )
143
00:06:06,400 --> 00:06:09,770
It's nice to know
I have this effect on people.
144
00:06:09,770 --> 00:06:12,170
( retching continues )
( sighs )
145
00:06:12,172 --> 00:06:14,412
( mellow theme playing )
146
00:06:14,408 --> 00:06:16,408
( siren wails in distance )
147
00:06:25,552 --> 00:06:27,552
( glass clatters, shatters )
148
00:06:27,554 --> 00:06:29,524
Hello?
149
00:06:29,523 --> 00:06:32,133
Excuse me? Is everything
all right in there?
150
00:06:32,126 --> 00:06:34,496
( phone ringing )
151
00:06:36,997 --> 00:06:38,797
HANNAH ( on phone ):
Hello.
152
00:06:38,799 --> 00:06:40,399
Hey. Hey, it's Alex.
153
00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:43,040
Uh, I've got a quick question
for you.
154
00:06:43,036 --> 00:06:44,236
When I'm old
and prolapsed,
155
00:06:44,238 --> 00:06:45,808
and I can't get to the pub
without help,
156
00:06:45,806 --> 00:06:47,106
will you kill me?
157
00:06:47,107 --> 00:06:48,607
I don't know.
158
00:06:48,609 --> 00:06:50,439
Come on, I need to know
you'd do it.
159
00:06:50,444 --> 00:06:52,914
Bag over the head,
pills in the Ovaltine?
160
00:06:52,913 --> 00:06:54,953
If there's to be
any future for us...
161
00:06:54,948 --> 00:06:56,518
Well, we'll just--
162
00:06:56,517 --> 00:06:57,617
( door opens )
163
00:06:57,618 --> 00:06:59,588
Uh, I hurt my hand.
164
00:06:59,586 --> 00:07:01,046
Uh, thanks for calling.
165
00:07:01,054 --> 00:07:03,494
( line hangs up )
H-Hello?
166
00:07:03,490 --> 00:07:05,060
( scoffs )
167
00:07:05,058 --> 00:07:06,158
( phone beeps )
( chuckles )
168
00:07:08,729 --> 00:07:10,929
HANNAH:
I'm sure there's
some up here.
169
00:07:14,735 --> 00:07:17,335
Oh, um,
170
00:07:17,337 --> 00:07:20,067
do you want a cup of tea
or a biscuit?
171
00:07:20,073 --> 00:07:22,183
You might need something sweet.
You know, blood sugar--
172
00:07:22,176 --> 00:07:23,806
Why would he pay for it?
173
00:07:25,746 --> 00:07:27,506
Is it something weird?
174
00:07:27,514 --> 00:07:29,084
Sorry?
175
00:07:29,082 --> 00:07:33,222
Why he comes to you.
Is it something...kinky?
176
00:07:33,220 --> 00:07:36,420
Does he like to dress up,
is that it?
177
00:07:36,423 --> 00:07:37,723
Is he a transvestite?
178
00:07:37,724 --> 00:07:39,134
Why would you think that?
179
00:07:39,126 --> 00:07:41,426
His dad's a vicar.
180
00:07:44,198 --> 00:07:46,698
Yeah, something like that.
181
00:07:46,700 --> 00:07:48,240
Why couldn't he
just get a girlfriend,
182
00:07:48,235 --> 00:07:51,905
or shag his secretary?
183
00:07:51,905 --> 00:07:53,135
Couldn't even manage that.
184
00:07:53,140 --> 00:07:54,240
Easier for him
185
00:07:54,241 --> 00:07:56,181
just to pull out
his credit card.
186
00:07:57,411 --> 00:08:00,881
What happens here is--
It's just sex.
187
00:08:00,881 --> 00:08:02,321
It's nothing.
188
00:08:03,717 --> 00:08:06,687
What you have, a marriage,
it's much more.
189
00:08:06,687 --> 00:08:09,417
Christ!
What the hell would you know?
190
00:08:09,423 --> 00:08:11,493
Do prostitutes
even have relationships?
191
00:08:11,491 --> 00:08:13,931
Do they? Have you--?
Have you got a boyfriend?
192
00:08:20,434 --> 00:08:23,944
He always was
a selfish bastard.
193
00:08:23,937 --> 00:08:27,537
That's why we waited so long
before having kids.
194
00:08:27,541 --> 00:08:31,211
He wasn't prepared to give up
his bachelor bloody lifestyle.
195
00:08:31,211 --> 00:08:32,381
Have you got children?
196
00:08:33,447 --> 00:08:36,577
Twins. Six months.
197
00:08:36,583 --> 00:08:39,323
Hardly surprising
we don't have much sex.
198
00:08:39,319 --> 00:08:42,489
He's always working
and I'm sat on the sofa,
199
00:08:42,489 --> 00:08:45,889
breast-feeding
like some old sow.
200
00:08:49,396 --> 00:08:51,666
I used to have great tits.
201
00:08:53,967 --> 00:08:58,067
Sometimes when I'm at home
I do those, um,
202
00:08:58,071 --> 00:08:59,711
survey things
where you tick a box
203
00:08:59,706 --> 00:09:03,906
to see how strong
your relationship is.
204
00:09:03,911 --> 00:09:06,051
I know they're ridiculous.
205
00:09:06,046 --> 00:09:09,046
I know they're just some
stupid thing in a magazine.
206
00:09:09,049 --> 00:09:11,319
But I always--
207
00:09:11,318 --> 00:09:15,858
Always get
a really high score.
208
00:09:15,856 --> 00:09:18,156
We do. I mean--
209
00:09:20,727 --> 00:09:22,057
You think that sounds
pathetic, don't you?
210
00:09:22,062 --> 00:09:24,162
No, I don't.
211
00:09:24,164 --> 00:09:26,704
I do.
212
00:09:28,201 --> 00:09:29,841
I'm going to clean
your bathroom.
213
00:09:29,836 --> 00:09:32,266
There's glass.
Oh, no, don't worry.
214
00:09:32,272 --> 00:09:33,572
It's fine.
No, I want to.
215
00:09:33,573 --> 00:09:35,413
No, no, no, really,
it's not necessary.
216
00:09:35,409 --> 00:09:38,649
No, please, it was--
I made the mess.
217
00:09:38,645 --> 00:09:41,775
( sighs )
218
00:09:41,782 --> 00:09:43,452
You must see everything here.
219
00:09:44,451 --> 00:09:47,621
Men, what they really want.
220
00:09:49,189 --> 00:09:51,189
( glass clinking )
221
00:09:51,191 --> 00:09:54,391
What--
What do they want?
222
00:09:54,394 --> 00:09:57,304
( jazzy theme playing )
223
00:09:57,297 --> 00:10:02,097
Well, one gentleman
224
00:10:02,102 --> 00:10:05,042
likes to dress up
as a tennis player
225
00:10:05,038 --> 00:10:10,178
while I play
with his new balls.
226
00:10:12,479 --> 00:10:14,609
( laughs )
227
00:10:14,614 --> 00:10:16,284
Men.
228
00:10:20,654 --> 00:10:22,794
Oh, what's this?
229
00:10:22,789 --> 00:10:24,559
Ah, you don't need
to...touch that.
230
00:10:24,558 --> 00:10:26,958
Um, it--
It's a plug.
231
00:10:26,960 --> 00:10:29,200
( buzzes )
Ooh, it vibrates.
232
00:10:29,196 --> 00:10:30,756
It's a butt plug.
233
00:10:33,967 --> 00:10:35,267
HELEN:
Ooh.
234
00:10:35,268 --> 00:10:36,268
( gags )
235
00:10:36,269 --> 00:10:38,469
( retching )
236
00:10:38,472 --> 00:10:41,072
( upbeat theme playing )
237
00:10:41,074 --> 00:10:42,244
( horn honks )
238
00:10:46,546 --> 00:10:47,646
( horn honking )
239
00:10:47,647 --> 00:10:48,977
BAMBI:
Is it just me, or some days
240
00:10:48,982 --> 00:10:52,422
does it feel like
everyone wants you?
241
00:10:52,419 --> 00:10:54,759
( giggles )
This is for you.
242
00:10:54,755 --> 00:10:58,055
It's Balenciaga,
to say thank you.
243
00:10:58,058 --> 00:10:59,458
What for?
244
00:10:59,459 --> 00:11:00,629
Everything.
245
00:11:00,627 --> 00:11:02,227
Aw.
Honestly,
246
00:11:02,229 --> 00:11:04,229
just walking down the street
on the way here
247
00:11:04,231 --> 00:11:06,001
I could feel
the eyes on me.
248
00:11:05,999 --> 00:11:07,969
I mean,
I know I'm hot, but...
249
00:11:07,968 --> 00:11:10,698
You're working, aren't you?
How did you guess?
250
00:11:10,704 --> 00:11:12,074
It's just what happens.
251
00:11:12,072 --> 00:11:15,882
When you're an escort, men--
Well, some men,
252
00:11:15,876 --> 00:11:17,036
they can just sense it.
253
00:11:17,044 --> 00:11:18,254
I don't know.
It's weird.
254
00:11:18,245 --> 00:11:19,945
Well, I'm doing it
properly this time.
255
00:11:19,946 --> 00:11:21,676
I've seen Stephanie
and she's taken me on.
256
00:11:21,681 --> 00:11:22,951
Proper clients,
257
00:11:22,949 --> 00:11:24,149
proper security.
( phone ringing )
258
00:11:24,151 --> 00:11:26,651
Oops.
Sorry, babes, hang on.
259
00:11:29,189 --> 00:11:30,619
All right, sweetie.
260
00:11:30,624 --> 00:11:31,764
No, no, no,
of course not.
261
00:11:31,758 --> 00:11:33,958
I'm just with a friend.
262
00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:36,030
No, not like that.
263
00:11:36,029 --> 00:11:37,959
Ha-ha-ha.
Listen, I've got to go,
264
00:11:37,964 --> 00:11:39,134
so you hold that thought.
265
00:11:39,132 --> 00:11:40,402
Ciao.
266
00:11:40,400 --> 00:11:42,670
( phone beeps )
Ah, he sounds really sweet.
267
00:11:42,669 --> 00:11:45,569
He's a time-waster
and he'll never make a booking.
268
00:11:45,572 --> 00:11:46,912
Tell him you're
not a chat line.
269
00:11:46,907 --> 00:11:48,277
Never take
his calls again.
270
00:11:48,275 --> 00:11:50,705
Seriously?
271
00:11:50,710 --> 00:11:54,250
Yeah, just don't get
carried away, all right?
272
00:11:54,247 --> 00:11:58,547
The money, the attention--
It's just a job.
273
00:11:58,552 --> 00:12:00,122
And in the end,
people will take
274
00:12:00,120 --> 00:12:02,060
what they can
and judge you for it.
275
00:12:02,055 --> 00:12:06,055
Just be careful,
is what I'm trying to say.
276
00:12:06,059 --> 00:12:07,529
See?
277
00:12:07,527 --> 00:12:09,257
Where would I be
without you?
278
00:12:10,564 --> 00:12:12,374
( phone beeping )
279
00:12:12,365 --> 00:12:13,365
BEN:
Shit, Han.
280
00:12:13,366 --> 00:12:15,736
Yeah, shit indeed.
281
00:12:15,735 --> 00:12:17,765
So go on.
What did she do then?
282
00:12:17,771 --> 00:12:20,811
Screeching,
bit of casual vomiting,
283
00:12:20,807 --> 00:12:23,937
just to show quite how
disgusting she found me.
284
00:12:23,944 --> 00:12:24,954
You know,
I always thought
285
00:12:24,945 --> 00:12:26,275
something like this
might happen.
286
00:12:26,279 --> 00:12:27,479
Why?
287
00:12:27,481 --> 00:12:29,321
Well, all these guys
have wives, don't they?
288
00:12:29,316 --> 00:12:30,546
Not all of them, no.
289
00:12:30,550 --> 00:12:33,220
Most of them.
So how did you leave it?
290
00:12:33,220 --> 00:12:35,090
Well, obviously she left.
291
00:12:35,088 --> 00:12:36,518
But you're gonna
keep in touch?
292
00:12:36,523 --> 00:12:38,563
Of course.
293
00:12:38,558 --> 00:12:40,058
We thought we'd make it
a regular thing,
294
00:12:40,060 --> 00:12:41,660
seeing as we had
so much in common.
295
00:12:41,661 --> 00:12:43,061
( chuckles )
296
00:12:43,063 --> 00:12:45,033
Shall we do one?
297
00:12:45,031 --> 00:12:46,531
( upbeat theme playing )
298
00:12:46,533 --> 00:12:48,303
HANNAH:
What shall we do now?
I don't want to go home.
299
00:12:48,301 --> 00:12:50,741
What, in case wifey's
still there, behind the door?
300
00:12:50,737 --> 00:12:51,907
Wifey? Ha-ha.
Yeah.
301
00:12:51,905 --> 00:12:53,665
So glad
you find it amusing.
302
00:12:53,673 --> 00:12:54,773
HANNAH:
Come on.
303
00:12:54,774 --> 00:12:56,614
We haven't been
out in ages.
304
00:12:56,610 --> 00:12:58,410
BEN:
I can't. Not tonight.
305
00:12:58,411 --> 00:13:01,281
We could go to that Thai place
with the fat guy.
306
00:13:01,281 --> 00:13:03,081
He sings on Wednesdays.
307
00:13:03,083 --> 00:13:04,783
I can't.
I'm on kitchen duty.
308
00:13:04,784 --> 00:13:06,194
What?
309
00:13:06,186 --> 00:13:09,286
We take it in turns cooking
for each other, me and Vanessa.
310
00:13:09,289 --> 00:13:11,529
Tofu stroganoff
in St Albans?
311
00:13:11,525 --> 00:13:14,455
The excitement
must be unbearable.
312
00:13:14,461 --> 00:13:15,831
You'd be surprised.
313
00:13:15,829 --> 00:13:17,829
Yeah, I would.
314
00:13:17,831 --> 00:13:19,101
( sighs )
315
00:13:19,099 --> 00:13:20,629
Come on.
316
00:13:20,634 --> 00:13:22,004
Just a quick one?
317
00:13:22,002 --> 00:13:23,272
Come on, one drink?
318
00:13:23,270 --> 00:13:24,910
I can't. She's picking me up
from the station.
319
00:13:24,905 --> 00:13:26,605
Yeah. Your loss.
320
00:13:28,175 --> 00:13:30,275
( chuckles )
321
00:13:30,277 --> 00:13:32,377
All right, I'll do it.
322
00:13:32,379 --> 00:13:33,949
ALEX:
Too late. I've changed my mind.
323
00:13:33,947 --> 00:13:35,917
Euthanasia is
very last week.
324
00:13:35,916 --> 00:13:37,316
That's a shame.
325
00:13:37,317 --> 00:13:38,717
Ah, you'll get over it.
326
00:13:38,718 --> 00:13:40,788
I was thinking
about cryogenics.
327
00:13:40,787 --> 00:13:42,557
You've got a big freezer.
328
00:13:43,623 --> 00:13:45,033
Bye.
329
00:13:45,025 --> 00:13:46,385
( line hangs up )
330
00:13:46,393 --> 00:13:48,203
( phone beeps )
Nutter.
331
00:13:49,262 --> 00:13:50,902
What have you done?
332
00:13:53,366 --> 00:13:56,136
She was here.
She saw you come in.
333
00:13:56,136 --> 00:13:59,406
I didn't have a choice.
334
00:13:59,406 --> 00:14:00,836
Well, that's it then,
isn't it?
335
00:14:00,840 --> 00:14:03,440
That--That's it.
It's over.
336
00:14:03,443 --> 00:14:06,853
It's fucking over.
Eight years of marriage.
337
00:14:06,846 --> 00:14:08,146
I'm...
338
00:14:09,349 --> 00:14:10,619
I'm really sorry, Tony.
339
00:14:10,617 --> 00:14:13,487
It's Matt.
My name is Matt.
340
00:14:13,486 --> 00:14:14,986
But it's, um--
341
00:14:14,988 --> 00:14:17,688
It's really got nothing
to do with me.
342
00:14:17,691 --> 00:14:19,331
You need to talk
to your wife.
343
00:14:19,326 --> 00:14:20,756
Talk to her?
344
00:14:20,760 --> 00:14:23,900
She won't even make
eye contact with me.
345
00:14:23,897 --> 00:14:26,167
She won't even let me
hold the twins.
346
00:14:26,166 --> 00:14:28,166
How can I even begin
to fix this
347
00:14:28,168 --> 00:14:29,438
if she won't even
look at me?
348
00:14:29,436 --> 00:14:30,436
She--
349
00:14:30,437 --> 00:14:32,907
( sighs )
350
00:14:32,906 --> 00:14:35,036
Hold me. Please.
351
00:14:37,210 --> 00:14:38,580
Matt.
352
00:14:38,578 --> 00:14:41,208
Look,
I can't lose you as well.
353
00:14:41,214 --> 00:14:43,754
If--If you wanna
be here, then...
354
00:14:43,750 --> 00:14:45,190
What?
355
00:14:45,185 --> 00:14:47,245
With me, you've...
356
00:14:48,622 --> 00:14:50,222
Oh.
357
00:14:50,223 --> 00:14:52,433
God, yes. Of course.
I'm sorry. Sorry.
358
00:14:52,425 --> 00:14:54,155
Um...
359
00:14:54,160 --> 00:14:56,860
Uh, yeah.
360
00:14:56,863 --> 00:15:01,233
The client-escort relationship
should have clear boundaries.
361
00:15:01,234 --> 00:15:05,074
Anything else
just doesn't work.
362
00:15:05,071 --> 00:15:07,111
( ska theme playing )
363
00:15:07,107 --> 00:15:08,107
Oh, yeah.
364
00:15:09,776 --> 00:15:11,006
Oh, yeah.
365
00:15:11,011 --> 00:15:12,811
Yeah.
366
00:15:12,812 --> 00:15:15,482
HELEN:
God, doesn't that
give you jaw ache?
367
00:15:16,483 --> 00:15:18,153
Cooee.
368
00:15:19,686 --> 00:15:21,386
W-What's going on?
Why have you stopped?
369
00:15:21,388 --> 00:15:23,488
Nothing. Sorry.
370
00:15:23,490 --> 00:15:25,060
( Matt sighs )
371
00:15:25,058 --> 00:15:27,058
( breathing heavily )
372
00:15:29,529 --> 00:15:31,769
( gasps )
Oh, so that's what he likes.
373
00:15:31,765 --> 00:15:33,425
What's the matter?
374
00:15:33,433 --> 00:15:34,703
Nothing.
375
00:15:37,604 --> 00:15:39,114
I can't do this
with you here.
376
00:15:40,373 --> 00:15:41,683
Oh, Christ.
377
00:15:42,876 --> 00:15:44,636
HELEN:
Oh, dear.
378
00:15:44,644 --> 00:15:48,254
I thought you were supposed
to be a professional.
379
00:15:48,248 --> 00:15:50,848
Right.
Uh, let's--
380
00:15:50,850 --> 00:15:52,590
Let's try something else,
shall we?
381
00:15:52,585 --> 00:15:53,885
( breathing heavily )
382
00:15:55,755 --> 00:15:57,315
Mm.
383
00:15:57,324 --> 00:15:58,364
( Helen clears throat )
384
00:16:00,760 --> 00:16:03,760
No, no, no, no, no, no--
No, no, don't stop.
385
00:16:03,763 --> 00:16:06,333
Please don't--
Don't stop.
386
00:16:06,333 --> 00:16:08,603
( moans )
387
00:16:08,601 --> 00:16:09,971
( Matt breathing heavily )
388
00:16:12,605 --> 00:16:14,405
No, I'm sorry.
I can't do this anymore.
389
00:16:14,407 --> 00:16:16,577
( gasping )
What?
390
00:16:16,576 --> 00:16:17,836
Why, what--?
What's happened?
391
00:16:17,844 --> 00:16:19,914
I'm sorry.
I'll refund your money.
392
00:16:19,913 --> 00:16:21,253
ney?
What the--?
393
00:16:21,247 --> 00:16:22,377
Bloody money.
What's going on?
394
00:16:22,382 --> 00:16:23,952
Look, this has got nothing
to do with me.
395
00:16:23,950 --> 00:16:25,290
You need to speak
to your wife.
396
00:16:25,285 --> 00:16:27,345
You can't just pretend
this isn't happening!
397
00:16:27,354 --> 00:16:28,864
Ah, the tart
with the heart.
398
00:16:28,855 --> 00:16:30,585
Look, talk to your wife.
Sort your marriage out.
399
00:16:30,590 --> 00:16:31,790
I can't see you anymore.
400
00:16:31,791 --> 00:16:34,561
What? Wait.
You're breaking up with me?
401
00:16:34,561 --> 00:16:36,861
We were never together!
402
00:16:39,299 --> 00:16:41,299
( soft guitar theme playing )
403
00:16:48,108 --> 00:16:51,848
HANNAH:
Relationships.
404
00:16:51,845 --> 00:16:53,445
♪ Have you ever ♪
405
00:16:53,446 --> 00:16:54,746
How do people do them?
406
00:16:54,748 --> 00:16:56,278
♪ Felt the rain? ♪
407
00:16:56,282 --> 00:16:58,152
I've no idea.
408
00:16:58,151 --> 00:17:03,291
♪ Have you ever tried
to complain? ♪
409
00:17:03,289 --> 00:17:06,959
This is why I shouldn't go
anywhere near them.
410
00:17:06,960 --> 00:17:11,330
♪ And face the world ♪
411
00:17:11,331 --> 00:17:13,331
This is why
I shouldn't even try.
412
00:17:13,333 --> 00:17:17,303
♪ Bites down in the hole ♪
413
00:17:17,303 --> 00:17:21,013
♪ The slow fuse ♪
414
00:17:24,077 --> 00:17:25,907
♪ What's so funny? ♪
415
00:17:25,912 --> 00:17:29,382
♪ What's so strange? ♪
416
00:17:29,382 --> 00:17:30,922
♪ You don't even
Know my name ♪
417
00:17:30,917 --> 00:17:33,687
Hi, Alex. It's me.
418
00:17:33,686 --> 00:17:34,686
Um...
419
00:17:34,687 --> 00:17:36,157
♪ Are you happy? ♪
420
00:17:36,156 --> 00:17:39,656
...can I come over,
for an hour?
421
00:17:39,659 --> 00:17:40,959
♪ An empty bottle ♪
422
00:17:40,960 --> 00:17:43,760
Okay. All right. Bye.
423
00:17:43,763 --> 00:17:44,763
( phone beeps )
424
00:17:48,234 --> 00:17:52,244
♪ We might be at war ♪
425
00:17:52,238 --> 00:17:53,638
( knock on door )
426
00:17:53,640 --> 00:17:54,670
Here you are.
427
00:17:54,674 --> 00:17:57,684
Your time starts
428
00:17:57,677 --> 00:18:00,307
...now.
Coffee?
429
00:18:04,217 --> 00:18:07,047
And I'm--I'm just not ready
to be a girlfriend--
430
00:18:07,053 --> 00:18:10,093
Shit, no milk.
Sorry.
431
00:18:10,089 --> 00:18:11,829
Anybody's girlfriend.
432
00:18:11,825 --> 00:18:12,855
Or indeed any coffee.
433
00:18:12,859 --> 00:18:13,959
( jar thunks )
434
00:18:15,662 --> 00:18:18,872
I'm a mess.
435
00:18:18,865 --> 00:18:21,195
Alex, are you actually listening
to anything I'm saying?
436
00:18:21,201 --> 00:18:22,541
Of course.
Of course.
437
00:18:22,535 --> 00:18:24,795
You're telling me
in an oh-so-delightful way
438
00:18:24,804 --> 00:18:25,914
that you want
to break up with me.
439
00:18:25,905 --> 00:18:28,635
Thing is,
you're not a mess.
440
00:18:28,641 --> 00:18:29,781
You're gorgeous.
441
00:18:29,776 --> 00:18:30,976
I-I just--
442
00:18:32,378 --> 00:18:33,608
I just--
I don't think
443
00:18:33,613 --> 00:18:35,353
it's fair on you,
to start something and--
444
00:18:35,348 --> 00:18:37,818
You walk out on me
in my hotel room.
445
00:18:37,817 --> 00:18:39,387
You run out on me
at dinner.
446
00:18:39,385 --> 00:18:41,245
You constantly
hang up on me.
447
00:18:41,254 --> 00:18:42,364
That sounds like
a relationship to me.
448
00:18:42,355 --> 00:18:44,015
Let's just stop.
Let's just be friends.
449
00:18:44,023 --> 00:18:45,433
No, I don't want
to be friends.
450
00:18:45,425 --> 00:18:46,625
( sighs )
451
00:18:46,626 --> 00:18:48,086
I want to do things
to you
452
00:18:48,094 --> 00:18:50,164
that I don't want to do
to my friends.
453
00:18:50,163 --> 00:18:51,733
( chuckles )
454
00:18:53,833 --> 00:18:55,903
Alex, I can't go
out with you.
455
00:18:55,902 --> 00:18:57,602
Irish coffee?
Except without the coffee,
456
00:18:57,604 --> 00:18:59,444
which would technically
be whiskey.
457
00:18:59,439 --> 00:19:00,569
I'm not what you want.
458
00:19:00,573 --> 00:19:02,583
You're exactly what I want.
I'm not.
459
00:19:02,575 --> 00:19:05,135
It's--
It's really complicated.
460
00:19:05,144 --> 00:19:07,754
I love complicated
because it's interesting.
461
00:19:07,747 --> 00:19:10,877
It's exciting.
it's just that--
462
00:19:10,884 --> 00:19:14,424
I'm not very good at, um,
just opening up or sharing.
463
00:19:14,420 --> 00:19:17,760
I'm--I'm--
I'm a very private person.
464
00:19:17,757 --> 00:19:18,957
I'm not asking you
465
00:19:18,958 --> 00:19:21,428
to tell me things,
to divulge your innermost.
466
00:19:24,163 --> 00:19:25,603
I mean, Jesus,
467
00:19:25,598 --> 00:19:28,538
who really knows everything
about anyone?
468
00:19:28,535 --> 00:19:30,395
Why would you
really want to?
469
00:19:31,771 --> 00:19:34,871
Do you really believe that?
470
00:19:34,874 --> 00:19:37,014
I do.
471
00:19:38,912 --> 00:19:43,282
Hannah, we're just starting.
472
00:19:45,218 --> 00:19:47,388
Don't run scared already.
473
00:20:05,071 --> 00:20:07,071
No, don't.
Hey. Why?
474
00:20:07,073 --> 00:20:09,613
No, because I'm trying
to break up with you.
475
00:20:09,609 --> 00:20:11,079
Tough. Tough.
476
00:20:13,246 --> 00:20:15,646
You can't always get
at you want.
477
00:20:21,854 --> 00:20:23,864
( tender guitar theme playing )
478
00:20:44,310 --> 00:20:45,980
Shit, I'm late.
479
00:20:45,979 --> 00:20:47,679
My boss is very punctual.
480
00:20:47,680 --> 00:20:49,150
An overrated quality.
481
00:20:49,148 --> 00:20:50,378
( chuckles )
BOTH: Mm.
482
00:20:50,383 --> 00:20:52,323
I've gotta go.
Oh.
483
00:20:52,318 --> 00:20:53,918
( both chuckle )
484
00:20:55,154 --> 00:20:57,564
Oh, Hannah?
Yeah?
485
00:20:57,557 --> 00:20:59,187
I really enjoyed
breaking up with you.
486
00:20:59,192 --> 00:21:00,332
Can we do it again soon,
please?
487
00:21:00,326 --> 00:21:02,226
( chuckles )
488
00:21:02,228 --> 00:21:04,228
( upbeat jazzy theme playing )
489
00:21:04,230 --> 00:21:06,070
( sighs )
490
00:21:06,065 --> 00:21:07,125
( horn honking )
491
00:21:08,501 --> 00:21:11,401
( siren wailing )
492
00:21:15,575 --> 00:21:17,405
My 9:30.
493
00:21:17,410 --> 00:21:19,550
He also wants
the girlfriend experience.
494
00:21:19,545 --> 00:21:24,745
He likes to lie in bed,
watch movies, and hold my hand.
495
00:21:24,751 --> 00:21:26,091
It's nice.
496
00:21:28,688 --> 00:21:31,688
( phone ringing )
497
00:21:36,396 --> 00:21:37,396
Hello?
498
00:21:37,397 --> 00:21:38,667
Hey, it's me.
499
00:21:40,533 --> 00:21:41,733
What are you doing?
500
00:21:41,734 --> 00:21:43,574
Oh, nothing much.
501
00:21:43,569 --> 00:21:45,469
Just getting ready
for work.
502
00:21:45,471 --> 00:21:47,311
I hope that you're
thinking about me.
503
00:21:47,306 --> 00:21:48,636
( laughs )
504
00:21:51,711 --> 00:21:53,811
I met someone.
What do you mean?
505
00:21:53,813 --> 00:21:55,183
Hey.
506
00:21:55,181 --> 00:21:57,421
ALEX:
Is he better looking than me?
507
00:21:57,417 --> 00:21:58,847
Is that actually possible?
508
00:21:58,851 --> 00:22:01,351
Come clean to him and I'll come
and have lunch with you then.
509
00:22:01,354 --> 00:22:03,064
So, Hannah, are you gonna
tell Alex the truth
510
00:22:03,056 --> 00:22:04,056
or shall I?
511
00:22:04,057 --> 00:22:06,027
( upbeat horn theme playing )
31998
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