Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,210 --> 00:00:03,420
Is there anything better
than Saturday-morning cartoons?
2
00:00:03,837 --> 00:00:05,130
Watching them
in silence?
3
00:00:05,130 --> 00:00:08,425
Shh! I can't hear
myself be lazy.
4
00:00:08,425 --> 00:00:10,469
Uh, what's with
the get up, Ma?
5
00:00:10,469 --> 00:00:12,679
You're father and I
are finally going to plant
6
00:00:12,679 --> 00:00:14,723
that veggie garden
we've been talking about.
7
00:00:14,723 --> 00:00:16,600
Hey, Aunt Carolina,
have you heard of this
8
00:00:16,600 --> 00:00:18,435
great new thing
called the grocery store?
9
00:00:18,769 --> 00:00:20,646
(CHUCKLES)
Oh, I'm going to miss
10
00:00:20,646 --> 00:00:22,147
your black
cloud nihilism
11
00:00:22,147 --> 00:00:24,233
once your mom comes
to pick you up.
12
00:00:24,233 --> 00:00:25,901
(DOORBELL RINGING REPEATEDLY)
13
00:00:25,901 --> 00:00:28,362
Overzealous
ding donging. Must be Mom.
14
00:00:29,863 --> 00:00:31,824
Hello, family!
15
00:00:31,824 --> 00:00:33,367
Stacy!
16
00:00:33,367 --> 00:00:35,077
BOTH: Aunt Stacy!
17
00:00:35,077 --> 00:00:36,495
Hey, Mom.
18
00:00:36,495 --> 00:00:39,206
Winifred. Get over here
and join the cuddle puddle.
19
00:00:39,873 --> 00:00:41,166
(CHUCKLES
AWKWARDLY)
20
00:00:41,458 --> 00:00:42,751
How was your tour?
21
00:00:42,751 --> 00:00:44,920
Fourteen
motivational talks, no sleep,
22
00:00:44,920 --> 00:00:46,755
and the airline
lost my baggage.
23
00:00:46,755 --> 00:00:48,382
It was amazing.
24
00:00:48,382 --> 00:00:50,050
Always so positive.
25
00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:51,385
You know
my motto.
26
00:00:51,718 --> 00:00:54,263
Positivity brings positiveness.
27
00:00:54,263 --> 00:00:55,389
Did I miss her?
Did I miss her?
28
00:00:55,889 --> 00:00:58,100
My favorite sister,
29
00:00:58,100 --> 00:00:59,226
who's also
my only sister! What's wrong?
30
00:00:59,226 --> 00:01:01,019
Aren't you glad
she's back?
31
00:01:01,019 --> 00:01:04,398
Yeah. But you know
my mom. She's all like, (EXCITEDLY) "Blah!"
32
00:01:04,648 --> 00:01:06,275
And I'm all like
(DRYLY) "Blegh!"
33
00:01:06,275 --> 00:01:08,151
She just
doesn't get me.
34
00:01:08,151 --> 00:01:11,697
I saw this shirt
in a mall in Tucson and thought,
35
00:01:11,697 --> 00:01:13,866
"This is Winifred!"
36
00:01:13,866 --> 00:01:15,033
Wow. Thanks.
37
00:01:15,993 --> 00:01:17,411
Doesn't get me.
38
00:01:17,411 --> 00:01:19,746
It's going to look
so cute on you,
39
00:01:19,746 --> 00:01:20,914
especially
when you come
40
00:01:20,914 --> 00:01:23,166
to my seminar today
as my VIP guest.
41
00:01:24,876 --> 00:01:26,461
Surprise!
(AIR HORN BLARING)
42
00:01:26,461 --> 00:01:29,506
This is why
Dad always told us to carry an air horn.
43
00:01:29,506 --> 00:01:32,509
Because you never know
when an air horn can come in handy.
44
00:01:32,509 --> 00:01:34,803
(AIR HORNS BLARING)
45
00:01:34,803 --> 00:01:37,347
Uh, Mom,
that sounds great,
46
00:01:37,347 --> 00:01:40,892
but motivational
seminars aren't really my thing.
47
00:01:40,892 --> 00:01:42,394
(SCOFFS) What are
you talking about?
48
00:01:42,394 --> 00:01:44,855
Positiveness runs
through your veins.
49
00:01:44,855 --> 00:01:46,607
The only thing
running through my veins
50
00:01:46,607 --> 00:01:48,275
is cynicism
and boba tea.
51
00:01:48,275 --> 00:01:50,402
You've never been
to one of my seminars before.
52
00:01:50,402 --> 00:01:52,279
I'd really like it
if you'd come.
53
00:01:52,279 --> 00:01:53,530
I, uh...
54
00:01:53,530 --> 00:01:56,158
I guess
I'll go put on
55
00:01:56,158 --> 00:01:58,035
my new abomination.
56
00:01:58,035 --> 00:01:59,411
I mean, shirt.
57
00:01:59,661 --> 00:02:01,496
Now that's something
to celebrate.
58
00:02:01,496 --> 00:02:02,873
(FEIGNS LAUGHTER)
59
00:02:03,707 --> 00:02:05,751
(AIR HORNS BLARING)
60
00:02:08,128 --> 00:02:10,547
Wow, there's a lot
of people here.
61
00:02:10,547 --> 00:02:11,840
I don't like people.
62
00:02:14,760 --> 00:02:16,345
These seats
are uncomfortable, right?
63
00:02:16,345 --> 00:02:18,639
Not as uncomfortable
as small talk.
64
00:02:18,639 --> 00:02:20,140
Hi, I'm Charlie.
65
00:02:20,140 --> 00:02:22,017
I'm a big
Stacy Grant fan.
66
00:02:22,017 --> 00:02:24,478
Positivity brings positiveness.
67
00:02:24,478 --> 00:02:27,439
Just like redundancy
brings redundantness.
68
00:02:27,439 --> 00:02:29,858
I'm here because
I almost gave up on my dreams.
69
00:02:30,150 --> 00:02:32,402
But then I saw a flyer
for this event.
70
00:02:32,402 --> 00:02:36,073
Stacy Grant. Positivity
brings positiveness.
71
00:02:36,073 --> 00:02:38,408
And I knew
this was the answer.
72
00:02:39,284 --> 00:02:43,121
Wow. What a testament
to the enduring power of print advertising.
73
00:02:43,121 --> 00:02:45,791
ANNOUNCER: All right.
Everybody get ready
74
00:02:45,791 --> 00:02:48,669
to welcome the queen
of positivity... (APPLAUDING)
75
00:02:48,669 --> 00:02:50,295
...Stacy Grant.
76
00:02:50,921 --> 00:02:53,006
(MUSIC PLAYING)
77
00:02:53,006 --> 00:02:55,509
♪ If you're stuck
in negativity
78
00:02:55,509 --> 00:02:57,219
♪ And you're looking
for success
79
00:02:57,219 --> 00:02:58,553
♪ Just remember
80
00:02:58,553 --> 00:03:01,306
♪ Positivity
brings positiveness
81
00:03:01,306 --> 00:03:03,767
♪ It's a one-step program
82
00:03:03,767 --> 00:03:06,603
♪ Positivity brings
positiveness ♪
83
00:03:06,603 --> 00:03:08,647
Oh!
84
00:03:08,647 --> 00:03:10,148
MAN: Positivity
brings positiveness is a registered trademark,
85
00:03:10,148 --> 00:03:11,483
but only within
this fictional universe.
86
00:03:11,733 --> 00:03:13,443
(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING)
87
00:03:13,443 --> 00:03:16,697
(SIGHS) It's gonna be
a long Saturday.
88
00:03:16,697 --> 00:03:18,448
Before we get started,
89
00:03:18,448 --> 00:03:20,200
we have
a very important guest in the audience today.
90
00:03:21,410 --> 00:03:25,122
Everybody, welcome
my positively awesome daughter, Winifred.
91
00:03:25,497 --> 00:03:27,499
(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING)
92
00:03:27,499 --> 00:03:29,292
Come on up, sweetie.
93
00:03:32,671 --> 00:03:33,797
Say hi to the
folks, honey.
94
00:03:34,548 --> 00:03:35,924
This is
the worst thing
95
00:03:35,924 --> 00:03:37,050
that's ever
happened to me.
96
00:03:37,050 --> 00:03:38,593
Isn't she a hoot?
97
00:03:38,593 --> 00:03:40,345
AUDIENCE: Aw!
98
00:03:40,345 --> 00:03:42,139
Now, to kick
things off,
99
00:03:42,139 --> 00:03:45,392
we need a volunteer
who's ready to embrace positiveness.
100
00:03:45,392 --> 00:03:47,769
Me! Me, me, me!
Pick me, pick me!
101
00:03:48,353 --> 00:03:49,896
Wow! Looks like
this gentleman
102
00:03:49,896 --> 00:03:51,231
in the front
is pumped.
103
00:03:51,231 --> 00:03:52,149
Come on up.
104
00:03:54,192 --> 00:03:56,403
Tell me, sir,
why are you here?
105
00:03:56,403 --> 00:03:58,071
Well, my name
is Charlie,
106
00:03:58,071 --> 00:03:59,614
and I have
this dream.
107
00:03:59,614 --> 00:04:01,158
I've worked on it
for years,
108
00:04:01,158 --> 00:04:03,660
but I'm afraid
that people will laugh at me.
109
00:04:03,660 --> 00:04:05,871
Charlie,
fear shouldn't get in the way.
110
00:04:05,871 --> 00:04:07,706
If you have
a gift, use it.
111
00:04:08,165 --> 00:04:10,333
Because what's
the first rule of positiveness?
112
00:04:10,333 --> 00:04:12,711
AUDIENCE:
Positivity! Yes!
113
00:04:12,711 --> 00:04:15,422
Are you ready to
embrace your positivity? Yes!
114
00:04:15,422 --> 00:04:17,424
Are you ready to
spread your wings?
115
00:04:17,424 --> 00:04:19,092
That's exactly it!
116
00:04:19,092 --> 00:04:20,594
You so get me.
117
00:04:20,594 --> 00:04:22,053
Then tell us
your dream, Charlie.
118
00:04:23,138 --> 00:04:25,015
Ever since
the dawn of time,
119
00:04:25,015 --> 00:04:27,559
man has
yearned to fly.
120
00:04:27,559 --> 00:04:31,271
And after years
of experimenting with goose DNA,
121
00:04:31,271 --> 00:04:34,566
I have reached
the next phase of human evolution.
122
00:04:34,566 --> 00:04:36,943
Anyone else sense
a tone shift here?
123
00:04:37,402 --> 00:04:40,655
Behold my true
identity!
124
00:04:41,698 --> 00:04:42,824
(AUDIENCE GASPING)
125
00:04:44,367 --> 00:04:46,161
Father Goose!
126
00:04:46,161 --> 00:04:49,539
(MAN READING)
127
00:04:51,333 --> 00:04:54,252
Okay, this is unexpected,
128
00:04:54,252 --> 00:04:57,464
but, um, at least
he's putting himself out there,
129
00:04:57,464 --> 00:04:59,883
which is something
I can get behind.
130
00:04:59,883 --> 00:05:02,594
Behind. Like where his
wings are coming out.
131
00:05:02,594 --> 00:05:04,095
(AUDIENCE LAUGHING)
132
00:05:06,348 --> 00:05:09,017
Uh... But...
(STAMMERING)
133
00:05:09,017 --> 00:05:10,393
He said "but",
and his wings
134
00:05:10,393 --> 00:05:11,645
are coming out
of his butt.
135
00:05:11,645 --> 00:05:12,979
Why are you laughing?
136
00:05:12,979 --> 00:05:14,606
This is not a joke!
137
00:05:14,606 --> 00:05:17,025
Traffic jams could be
a thing of the past.
138
00:05:17,025 --> 00:05:19,277
We can all fly south
for the winter.
139
00:05:19,277 --> 00:05:20,737
Don't you see? Oh!
140
00:05:20,737 --> 00:05:23,990
I can see you got wings
coming out of your butt.
141
00:05:23,990 --> 00:05:27,911
All right, that's it!
Hear my mighty honk!
142
00:05:27,911 --> 00:05:29,246
(SCREAMING)
143
00:05:34,251 --> 00:05:35,335
(GEESE HONKING)
144
00:05:38,380 --> 00:05:39,756
GRETEL:
I just don't get gardening.
145
00:05:40,006 --> 00:05:41,591
I wish this show
had sound.
146
00:05:41,967 --> 00:05:42,968
We can always
add our own.
147
00:05:43,343 --> 00:05:45,637
I'm an adult.
I like dirt.
148
00:05:45,637 --> 00:05:47,514
HAMSTER: I'm a goose.
I want your dirt.
149
00:05:48,223 --> 00:05:50,267
GRETEL: Ay, caramba,
leave the dirt alone!
150
00:05:50,267 --> 00:05:53,270
HAMSTER: Dirt is
free, woman. Free!
151
00:05:53,270 --> 00:05:54,688
(GEESE HONKING)
152
00:06:08,118 --> 00:06:09,369
(SCREAMING)
153
00:06:09,369 --> 00:06:11,246
My mighty honk
has activated
154
00:06:11,246 --> 00:06:13,164
the natural aggression
of every goose
155
00:06:13,164 --> 00:06:14,958
in the
tri-state area!
156
00:06:14,958 --> 00:06:16,751
Wait.
You control geese?
157
00:06:16,751 --> 00:06:17,836
No, I just
rile them up.
158
00:06:17,836 --> 00:06:19,254
What they do
is their business.
159
00:06:19,254 --> 00:06:20,672
(MAN READING)
160
00:06:24,551 --> 00:06:26,261
I used to be embarrassed
of my wings.
161
00:06:26,845 --> 00:06:30,682
But now I am positive
of their positiveness.
162
00:06:31,099 --> 00:06:34,186
My geese and I
will take over the world!
163
00:06:34,561 --> 00:06:35,604
(GIBBERING)
164
00:06:39,733 --> 00:06:41,276
Yes! It's beautiful!
165
00:06:42,777 --> 00:06:44,779
The dirt is mine.
The dirt is mine.
166
00:06:44,779 --> 00:06:46,198
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
Hey, what's up, Fred?
167
00:06:46,198 --> 00:06:47,616
I'm in the middle
of something.
168
00:06:47,616 --> 00:06:49,075
Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
169
00:06:49,075 --> 00:06:51,202
Butt wings.
Uh-huh.
170
00:06:51,202 --> 00:06:52,746
Cool. All right.
Be right there.
171
00:06:52,746 --> 00:06:54,539
We have
a situation. Let's go!
172
00:06:54,539 --> 00:06:55,999
Gretel, let's go!
173
00:06:55,999 --> 00:06:58,168
Ay, mi amor,
I will fight off these geese.
174
00:06:58,168 --> 00:06:59,628
Back, geese!
Back!
175
00:06:59,628 --> 00:07:00,879
Isn't this great?
176
00:07:01,254 --> 00:07:03,590
Nobody's laughing
now, huh?
177
00:07:04,382 --> 00:07:06,301
Whoa!
Mom!
178
00:07:06,301 --> 00:07:09,846
Come, Stacy. Look at
what we did together.
179
00:07:09,846 --> 00:07:11,598
Actually,
this is all you.
180
00:07:11,598 --> 00:07:13,141
I had nothing
to do with this.
181
00:07:13,141 --> 00:07:16,937
Hey, butt wings,
put my mom down, or I'll...
182
00:07:16,937 --> 00:07:19,397
Fred,
threats won't help in any situation.
183
00:07:19,397 --> 00:07:21,816
Which is why
we need your talents,
184
00:07:21,816 --> 00:07:24,236
your brutal honesty
and black cloud nihilism.
185
00:07:24,236 --> 00:07:26,154
Oh, she does get me.
186
00:07:27,781 --> 00:07:30,533
Hey, Charlie,
let's chat.
187
00:07:34,496 --> 00:07:35,997
Oh, there's
too many geese.
188
00:07:35,997 --> 00:07:37,165
We've got to
clear our path
189
00:07:37,165 --> 00:07:38,458
or we'll never get
to Fred in time.
190
00:07:38,458 --> 00:07:40,502
Okay, but how are we
going to get rid of them?
191
00:07:40,502 --> 00:07:41,711
I'm sure I can
think of something,
192
00:07:41,711 --> 00:07:43,463
but I just can't concentrate
with all this noise.
193
00:07:43,463 --> 00:07:45,882
Hey, stop!
Don't you honk at me!
194
00:07:46,216 --> 00:07:47,592
I can honk at you!
195
00:07:47,592 --> 00:07:48,802
(CAR HORN HONKING)
Honk, honk! Yeah!
196
00:07:48,802 --> 00:07:50,262
How do you
like it, huh?
197
00:07:50,262 --> 00:07:51,721
Yeah, doesn't feel
nice, does it?
198
00:07:52,264 --> 00:07:55,308
This is why Dad
always told us to carry an air horn.
199
00:07:55,850 --> 00:07:59,396
You never know
when an air horn can come in handy.
200
00:07:59,396 --> 00:08:02,649
Hey, sis, let's go get
some imaginary ice cream.
201
00:08:02,649 --> 00:08:03,942
Whee!
202
00:08:04,693 --> 00:08:06,861
Gretel, Hamster,
we need an air horn.
203
00:08:06,861 --> 00:08:10,323
A really
loud horn. On it.
204
00:08:10,323 --> 00:08:11,658
(GEESE SCREECHING)
205
00:08:12,492 --> 00:08:13,994
Uh, we'll take
the sunroof.
206
00:08:17,247 --> 00:08:18,373
Chuck, I don't think
207
00:08:18,373 --> 00:08:19,708
you've thought
this through.
208
00:08:19,708 --> 00:08:22,127
Maybe. But all I need
is positivity
209
00:08:22,127 --> 00:08:23,586
to realize my dream.
210
00:08:23,586 --> 00:08:24,754
Let's be honest.
211
00:08:24,754 --> 00:08:27,090
Not every dream
needs to be realized.
212
00:08:27,090 --> 00:08:29,342
I once dreamed
I had snakes for fingers.
213
00:08:29,342 --> 00:08:30,802
Should I have
pursued that?
214
00:08:30,802 --> 00:08:32,470
Uh... no.
215
00:08:32,470 --> 00:08:34,556
No. Look
at yourself.
216
00:08:34,556 --> 00:08:36,433
You've got wings
coming out of your butt
217
00:08:36,433 --> 00:08:38,018
and a bunch
of upset geese
218
00:08:38,018 --> 00:08:39,644
who don't even
respect you.
219
00:08:39,644 --> 00:08:41,980
And they're geese.
Geese, man.
220
00:08:41,980 --> 00:08:43,648
This dream is dumb.
221
00:08:43,648 --> 00:08:45,650
MAN: This dream is dumb
is also a registered trademark,
222
00:08:45,650 --> 00:08:47,277
but again, only in this
fictional universe.
223
00:08:47,694 --> 00:08:49,237
You sound
just like my dad.
224
00:08:49,696 --> 00:08:51,698
Actually, I'm more
like my mom.
225
00:08:51,698 --> 00:08:52,949
Hit it.
226
00:08:52,949 --> 00:08:55,243
(MUSIC PLAYING)
227
00:08:55,243 --> 00:08:57,787
(DRYLY) ♪ If you've got
an idea that's bad
228
00:08:57,787 --> 00:08:58,663
♪ Don't do it ♪
229
00:08:59,247 --> 00:09:00,332
You're right.
230
00:09:00,332 --> 00:09:01,875
I've made
a huge mistake.
231
00:09:02,167 --> 00:09:03,668
I'm in way over
my head.
232
00:09:03,668 --> 00:09:05,211
I'll get them
out of here.
233
00:09:05,211 --> 00:09:07,172
Shoo, geese! Shoo!
234
00:09:07,172 --> 00:09:09,174
Oh, no. I can
rile them up,
235
00:09:09,174 --> 00:09:10,842
but I can't
rile them down.
236
00:09:10,842 --> 00:09:12,093
I don't know
what to do.
237
00:09:12,093 --> 00:09:14,346
(HORN BLARING)
238
00:09:19,601 --> 00:09:22,187
Yeah, that's what
I'm talking about!
239
00:09:22,187 --> 00:09:24,189
Thanks.
It's much heavier than I thought.
240
00:09:27,901 --> 00:09:29,194
Ah. That explains it.
241
00:09:29,986 --> 00:09:31,529
We're here!
242
00:09:31,529 --> 00:09:33,698
(SOBBING) I can't
believe I put wings
243
00:09:33,698 --> 00:09:35,617
on my butt
for no reason.
244
00:09:35,909 --> 00:09:37,911
It's not
for no reason, Charlie.
245
00:09:37,911 --> 00:09:39,496
You learned
something today.
246
00:09:39,496 --> 00:09:40,747
You learned
247
00:09:40,747 --> 00:09:42,499
not to put wings
on your butt,
248
00:09:42,499 --> 00:09:43,625
and that's important.
249
00:09:44,250 --> 00:09:47,212
But I think you've made
positive progress today, Charlie.
250
00:09:47,212 --> 00:09:48,963
Not everyone
is gonna get you.
251
00:09:50,298 --> 00:09:51,966
But as long as
you get you,
252
00:09:52,425 --> 00:09:54,302
and you don't declare
war on humanity
253
00:09:54,302 --> 00:09:55,929
with a grumpy
goose army,
254
00:09:55,929 --> 00:09:57,764
I'm sure
you'll figure it out.
255
00:09:57,764 --> 00:09:59,474
Or you won't.
Whatever.
256
00:09:59,474 --> 00:10:00,642
Can we get dinner?
257
00:10:00,642 --> 00:10:01,768
Yeah, I could eat.
258
00:10:02,018 --> 00:10:03,144
(SOBBING)
259
00:10:03,144 --> 00:10:04,270
Well, our work
here is done.
260
00:10:07,357 --> 00:10:08,691
You really
have a talent
261
00:10:08,691 --> 00:10:09,901
for making
grown men cry.
262
00:10:10,485 --> 00:10:11,694
Hold on to that.
263
00:10:11,694 --> 00:10:13,780
I guess you get me
after all.
264
00:10:13,780 --> 00:10:15,031
Why would you
doubt that?
265
00:10:15,031 --> 00:10:16,658
Um, this shirt?
266
00:10:16,658 --> 00:10:18,952
(CHUCKLES)
Fred, I know
267
00:10:18,952 --> 00:10:21,246
you'd never
in a million years buy a shirt like that.
268
00:10:21,538 --> 00:10:23,873
I got it for you ironically.
269
00:10:23,873 --> 00:10:26,251
Plus, when you put it
under black light.
270
00:10:27,961 --> 00:10:30,046
Brutal. I love it.
271
00:10:30,422 --> 00:10:31,965
Do you mean that sarcastically
272
00:10:31,965 --> 00:10:33,424
or do you
actually love it?
273
00:10:33,424 --> 00:10:34,801
I'll never tell.
274
00:10:38,972 --> 00:10:40,473
Laser wing removal?
275
00:10:40,932 --> 00:10:42,767
Why couldn't I have
seen this first?
276
00:10:42,767 --> 00:10:44,811
WOMAN: ♪ If you've got
a dream that's bad
277
00:10:44,811 --> 00:10:45,687
♪ Don't do it ♪
278
00:10:46,479 --> 00:10:48,356
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
279
00:10:58,533 --> 00:11:00,368
♪ Hamster and Gretel
280
00:11:06,583 --> 00:11:09,669
♪ It's Hamster
281
00:11:09,669 --> 00:11:11,504
♪ Hamster and Gretel ♪
282
00:11:11,554 --> 00:11:16,104
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
20155
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.