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1
00:00:01,268 --> 00:00:04,418
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
2
00:00:19,653 --> 00:00:21,453
(SNICKERING)
3
00:00:25,893 --> 00:00:27,663
Let me assist you, I.Q.
4
00:00:27,728 --> 00:00:28,928
Thank you, I.Q.
5
00:00:28,996 --> 00:00:30,426
Here are those equations
we need, I.Q.
6
00:00:30,498 --> 00:00:33,298
I couldn't have done this
better myself, I.Q.
7
00:00:33,367 --> 00:00:35,297
And you didn't, I.Q.
8
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(ALL LAUGHING)
9
00:00:36,436 --> 00:00:39,066
Very witty. You're so clever.
10
00:00:39,140 --> 00:00:42,340
Muttley, today, we are
going to pilfer any apparatus
11
00:00:42,410 --> 00:00:44,750
that addled-brained adolescent
has invented
12
00:00:44,812 --> 00:00:47,482
that might assist me
to win today's race.
13
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I.Q.:
Hi, there, Mr. Dastardly.
14
00:00:48,916 --> 00:00:50,486
Long time no see.
15
00:00:50,552 --> 00:00:52,722
(LAUGHS NERVOUSLY)
It wasn't me! No! Muttley did it!
16
00:00:52,786 --> 00:00:56,186
I'd be happy to
testify against him.
17
00:00:56,257 --> 00:00:58,357
Hello, Dick.
It's been a while.
18
00:00:58,425 --> 00:00:59,985
Still pointlessly cheating
19
00:01:00,061 --> 00:01:02,301
in self-destructive
and unhealthy ways?
20
00:01:02,362 --> 00:01:04,402
Why do you look so old?
21
00:01:04,464 --> 00:01:06,434
I'm not old. I'm barely 40.
22
00:01:06,500 --> 00:01:10,540
40? Ugh. Cover your shame.
23
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-Hello, Mr. Dastardly.
-(GASPS)
24
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I.Q., what is going on here?
25
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These are future versions
of myself.
26
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They've come back
in time to help me
27
00:01:18,245 --> 00:01:19,205
invent the time machine
28
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that will allow
them to travel back
29
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in time to help me invent it.
30
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You realize you never make
any sense at all?
31
00:01:26,620 --> 00:01:28,190
Hi, guys.
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00:01:28,256 --> 00:01:30,926
It's just an ontological,
multi-actual, non-causational
33
00:01:30,991 --> 00:01:32,761
temporal transverse time loop.
34
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-Huh?
-Of course. Simple.
35
00:01:34,995 --> 00:01:37,425
What kind of brainless buffoon
would not understand that?
36
00:01:37,497 --> 00:01:39,027
Oh, Dicky. How's it going?
37
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-Speak of the devil.
-Oh, look.
38
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A time machine
that's causing an ontological,
39
00:01:42,703 --> 00:01:43,973
multi-actual, non-causational
40
00:01:44,038 --> 00:01:45,908
temporal transverse
time loop. Cool!
41
00:01:45,973 --> 00:01:48,813
Shiny lights!
Oh, can I take a selfie?
42
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(ELECTRICITY ZAPPING)
43
00:01:51,445 --> 00:01:53,175
-(ROARS)
-Oopsie.
44
00:01:53,247 --> 00:01:56,477
Peter has brought a dinosaur
forward in time!
45
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Cheese!
46
00:01:57,918 --> 00:02:01,458
(LASERS FIRING)
47
00:02:01,521 --> 00:02:04,321
(SCREAMING)
48
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(ROARS)
49
00:02:06,894 --> 00:02:09,464
Hmm. A mind control beanie.
50
00:02:09,529 --> 00:02:10,659
What use would that be?
51
00:02:10,731 --> 00:02:12,201
I can already control people
52
00:02:12,266 --> 00:02:14,896
with my charismatic charm
and savoir faire.
53
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Ah! Dastardly!
54
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Gadzooks! Who might you be?
55
00:02:18,072 --> 00:02:20,512
I'm the future Dick Dastardly
come back to stop you
56
00:02:20,575 --> 00:02:23,405
from making the biggest
mistake of your life!
57
00:02:23,477 --> 00:02:25,007
You smell like a wet yak.
58
00:02:25,079 --> 00:02:26,379
Why should I listen to you?
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00:02:26,447 --> 00:02:29,347
Because if you don't,
your life will be
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00:02:29,416 --> 00:02:30,776
a continuous series
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00:02:30,851 --> 00:02:32,821
of failure, humiliation,
62
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and cheap slapstick
sight gags.
63
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Like that.
64
00:02:38,426 --> 00:02:42,696
Don't steal that.
Take this instead.
65
00:02:42,763 --> 00:02:44,433
No, I don't want to.
I want that.
66
00:02:44,498 --> 00:02:46,268
I am older and wiser!
67
00:02:46,334 --> 00:02:49,204
I want the super cool
blaster beam!
68
00:02:49,270 --> 00:02:50,800
That's exactly how I ended up
69
00:02:50,871 --> 00:02:52,841
a smelly, gross, slightly
sticky old man
70
00:02:52,907 --> 00:02:57,237
with one tooth
and a pet cockroach that lives in my nose!
71
00:02:57,310 --> 00:02:59,010
Hi, everybody.
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00:02:59,079 --> 00:03:01,949
The day I chose to steal
73
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that stupid blaster
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00:03:04,285 --> 00:03:07,745
instead of a mind control
device that would've made me
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00:03:07,821 --> 00:03:10,261
the most powerful man
on Earth!
76
00:03:10,324 --> 00:03:13,464
You want it so much,
then you and your nose bug can just take it.
77
00:03:13,527 --> 00:03:14,697
Fine. I will!
78
00:03:14,761 --> 00:03:15,761
I hope you do!
79
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BOTH: Goodbye!
80
00:03:17,564 --> 00:03:18,734
Ah!
81
00:03:18,799 --> 00:03:21,539
Good gravy.
I was a complete nitwit.
82
00:03:21,602 --> 00:03:23,602
(MUTTLEY AGREEING)
83
00:03:23,670 --> 00:03:25,470
(ROARING)
84
00:03:25,539 --> 00:03:27,039
Now, I just need someone
85
00:03:27,108 --> 00:03:29,038
to help me operate
the time machine.
86
00:03:29,110 --> 00:03:30,340
Say cheese, Dicky.
87
00:03:30,411 --> 00:03:31,951
Speaking
of spoiled dairy products,
88
00:03:32,012 --> 00:03:33,982
have you changed
your aftershave? I like it.
89
00:03:34,048 --> 00:03:35,978
Listen to me,
you Herculean half-wit.
90
00:03:36,050 --> 00:03:38,050
I need your feckless fingers
91
00:03:38,119 --> 00:03:40,189
to facilitate my flight
to the future!
92
00:03:40,254 --> 00:03:42,464
Hmm, that sounds like
an oddly specific request
93
00:03:42,523 --> 00:03:44,123
that could have
catastrophic results.
94
00:03:44,190 --> 00:03:45,290
Okay!
95
00:03:45,358 --> 00:03:48,358
(CRACKLING)
96
00:03:48,428 --> 00:03:50,758
(ROARS)
97
00:03:50,831 --> 00:03:52,071
What happened?
98
00:03:52,133 --> 00:03:53,833
Someone activated
the time machine.
99
00:03:53,901 --> 00:03:55,601
But if whoever did that
isn't careful,
100
00:03:55,670 --> 00:03:57,770
they could change
the course of the future.
101
00:03:57,838 --> 00:03:58,838
How?
102
00:03:58,906 --> 00:04:00,436
Like that.
103
00:04:00,508 --> 00:04:02,538
-Hi, y'all.
What's going on here? -I have no idea.
104
00:04:02,610 --> 00:04:05,880
I'm pretty sure someone
used my time machine to alter their past,
105
00:04:05,946 --> 00:04:08,146
which could radically
alter the time stream
106
00:04:08,215 --> 00:04:11,315
with possibly
catastrophic results!
107
00:04:11,384 --> 00:04:12,194
(COUGHS)
108
00:04:12,253 --> 00:04:14,963
I.Q. I came back to warn me.
109
00:04:15,022 --> 00:04:19,162
The future has become
a dystopian nightmare.
110
00:04:19,226 --> 00:04:22,096
There's only one thing to do.
111
00:04:22,162 --> 00:04:23,102
(FIRING)
112
00:04:23,164 --> 00:04:27,234
You must
destroy Dick Dastardly.
113
00:04:27,301 --> 00:04:31,971
Well, okey-dokey
with me. Tiny?
114
00:04:32,039 --> 00:04:33,309
Okay. That's that.
115
00:04:33,374 --> 00:04:37,614
Tiny, give him back.
And no digesting.
116
00:04:37,678 --> 00:04:41,448
I was wearing shoes.
117
00:04:41,515 --> 00:04:42,875
(MEOWS)
118
00:04:42,950 --> 00:04:45,520
Hey, these shoes aren't mine.
119
00:04:45,586 --> 00:04:48,716
I must save the future
from Dick Dastardly!
120
00:04:48,789 --> 00:04:52,659
Eat hot justice, tyrant!
121
00:04:52,726 --> 00:04:54,386
(EXPLOSION)
122
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(LAUGHS) Tickles.
123
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(SCREAMS)
124
00:05:00,767 --> 00:05:01,797
MUTTLEY: Uh-oh.
125
00:05:01,869 --> 00:05:04,869
(SCREAMING)
126
00:05:04,938 --> 00:05:08,508
-We need to stop I.Q.
-On it!
127
00:05:08,576 --> 00:05:11,376
Leave Dastardly alone,
you fiend!
128
00:05:11,445 --> 00:05:14,345
It's not me! I mean,
it is me, but not yet.
129
00:05:14,415 --> 00:05:16,875
Don't try to confuse me
with your science-y fact talk.
130
00:05:16,950 --> 00:05:19,150
I get my news
from cable television.
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00:05:19,220 --> 00:05:21,220
DASTARDLY: All right,
you perspicacious protege!
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00:05:21,288 --> 00:05:25,628
Prepare for some
prodigious payback!
133
00:05:25,692 --> 00:05:27,402
Drat.
134
00:05:27,461 --> 00:05:30,401
Dastardly must have
changed something in our future's timeline.
135
00:05:30,464 --> 00:05:32,874
That's why the I.Q.s
are coming back
136
00:05:32,933 --> 00:05:35,643
to stop him!
137
00:05:35,703 --> 00:05:39,173
I've been sent from the future
to destroy wacky racers
138
00:05:39,240 --> 00:05:41,180
and bring Dastardly
to the future.
139
00:05:41,242 --> 00:05:43,942
Oh, no, you don't.
140
00:05:46,613 --> 00:05:48,563
(ALL YELLING)
141
00:05:52,986 --> 00:05:55,086
Sweet Georgia peaches!
142
00:05:55,155 --> 00:05:58,315
I.Q., do something
to stop yourself!
143
00:05:58,391 --> 00:06:00,891
I'll try!
144
00:06:00,961 --> 00:06:04,401
(YELLING)
145
00:06:04,465 --> 00:06:07,025
Hasta la vista, racers.
146
00:06:07,101 --> 00:06:10,471
The cyborg from the future
talks in cliches.
147
00:06:10,537 --> 00:06:14,837
What a surprise!
148
00:06:14,908 --> 00:06:17,078
Hey! You weren't
supposed to eat me.
149
00:06:17,144 --> 00:06:18,354
Why were you acting like that?
150
00:06:18,412 --> 00:06:20,182
He must've been
mind controlled.
151
00:06:20,247 --> 00:06:21,917
But the only thing
that could do that
152
00:06:21,982 --> 00:06:24,222
is my mind control
beanie back in the lab.
153
00:06:24,285 --> 00:06:26,585
Ah. Yes. Funny story.
154
00:06:26,654 --> 00:06:30,064
A deranged and smelly version
of myself from the future
155
00:06:30,124 --> 00:06:33,564
did pop by earlier
and steal your beanie thing.
156
00:06:33,628 --> 00:06:35,358
But what would you do
with that power?
157
00:06:35,429 --> 00:06:37,529
Well, offhand, I'd probably
conquer the world,
158
00:06:37,598 --> 00:06:39,668
and send an army of
robotic Muttleys back in time
159
00:06:39,734 --> 00:06:42,174
to make sure the timeline
stays the way I wanted it.
160
00:06:42,236 --> 00:06:43,796
I mean, I guess I would,
I'm just--
161
00:06:43,871 --> 00:06:46,011
Got it on the first try,
old bean.
162
00:06:46,073 --> 00:06:48,583
Surrender past Dastardly
to me immediately
163
00:06:48,643 --> 00:06:51,113
so I may ensure
he will become me
164
00:06:51,178 --> 00:06:52,978
or I will destroy you all!
165
00:06:53,047 --> 00:06:56,517
Oh, yeah? You and what army?
166
00:06:56,584 --> 00:06:58,594
PETER: Oh, that army.
PENELOPE: Dastardly.
167
00:06:58,653 --> 00:07:00,653
You really suck eggs,
you know that?
168
00:07:00,721 --> 00:07:02,391
Get him!
169
00:07:02,456 --> 00:07:07,456
We have to
keep Dastardly away from himself.
170
00:07:08,562 --> 00:07:09,632
Down there!
171
00:07:09,696 --> 00:07:11,126
I'm not going down there!
172
00:07:11,198 --> 00:07:16,198
It smells like Perfect's
gym shorts on taco Tuesday.
173
00:07:17,939 --> 00:07:21,009
Don't worry,
my robotic hordes. We'll find them!
174
00:07:21,075 --> 00:07:25,125
It's only a matter of time.
175
00:07:28,816 --> 00:07:31,216
(ON TV)This is your State-metered mouthpiece, Brick Crashman,
176
00:07:31,286 --> 00:07:34,986
celebrating 20 years of Dick Dastardly's reign of dystopian terror.
177
00:07:35,056 --> 00:07:40,026
Oh, I can't believe Brick
works for the Emperor now.
178
00:07:40,094 --> 00:07:41,634
Hey, we were watching that.
179
00:07:41,696 --> 00:07:43,226
Not that there's anything
else to do
180
00:07:43,297 --> 00:07:45,167
in this horrible, disgusting
filthy sewer.
181
00:07:45,232 --> 00:07:47,732
How about another game
of plop ball?
182
00:07:47,801 --> 00:07:49,401
(SNICKERING)
183
00:07:49,470 --> 00:07:52,770
We've been playing
plop ball for 20 years!
184
00:07:52,839 --> 00:07:54,069
And I never win!
185
00:07:54,141 --> 00:07:55,611
What's going on, I.Q.?
186
00:07:55,676 --> 00:07:58,046
I think I know how we can
reset the timeline to before
187
00:07:58,112 --> 00:08:00,212
Emperor Dastardly
took over the world.
188
00:08:00,281 --> 00:08:03,081
If we're gonna pull it off,
we'll have to sneak back
189
00:08:03,150 --> 00:08:04,950
into the old Wacky Races
Headquarters.
190
00:08:05,019 --> 00:08:08,119
But that's one of the most
heavily guarded places in the world.
191
00:08:08,188 --> 00:08:09,958
We'll never get out alive.
192
00:08:10,023 --> 00:08:11,563
I love this plan.
193
00:08:11,626 --> 00:08:15,456
It's still better than playing
plop ball with Perfect.
194
00:08:15,529 --> 00:08:17,829
This is never going to work.
195
00:08:17,898 --> 00:08:19,128
We have to try, Dastardly.
196
00:08:19,199 --> 00:08:21,139
Now, just like we practiced.
197
00:08:21,201 --> 00:08:23,401
DASTARDLY: Uh, um, yes.
198
00:08:23,471 --> 00:08:25,641
(CLEARS THROAT)
Attention, my mechanical mutts!
199
00:08:25,706 --> 00:08:28,676
I am your ruler,
Emperor Dastardly.
200
00:08:28,742 --> 00:08:31,282
And these are, uh...
201
00:08:31,345 --> 00:08:32,905
(WHISPERS) Your guards.
202
00:08:32,980 --> 00:08:34,720
-My jars!
-Huh?
203
00:08:34,782 --> 00:08:38,652
I order you to allow us
to pass. At once!
204
00:08:38,718 --> 00:08:43,088
(MUTTERING)
205
00:08:43,157 --> 00:08:45,057
I.Q.: Look! My time machine!
206
00:08:45,125 --> 00:08:46,855
By golly, that was easy.
207
00:08:46,927 --> 00:08:48,627
Well, of course, my dear.
208
00:08:48,696 --> 00:08:50,596
Never doubt the clever
coruscations of Richard Milhouse--
209
00:08:50,665 --> 00:08:53,195
-Dastardly!
-(SNICKERING)
210
00:08:53,267 --> 00:08:54,837
It was a trap!
211
00:08:54,902 --> 00:08:56,702
EMPEROR DASTARDLY:
Of course it was a trap, you fools!
212
00:08:56,771 --> 00:08:58,441
I know everything
you're about to do
213
00:08:58,506 --> 00:09:00,606
-because I've
already lived through it! -Huh?
214
00:09:00,675 --> 00:09:02,705
Just like I know
you're about to bash me
215
00:09:02,776 --> 00:09:03,946
with that wrench, Pitstop.
216
00:09:04,012 --> 00:09:05,752
(STAMMERING) Oh, I wasn't
going to bash you.
217
00:09:05,813 --> 00:09:09,983
I was, uh, just admiring
your distinctive profile.
218
00:09:10,050 --> 00:09:12,020
Mmm. Handsome.
219
00:09:12,085 --> 00:09:14,045
Oh, do you really think so?
220
00:09:14,121 --> 00:09:16,491
Ha, it's not even
my good side. Aah!
221
00:09:16,557 --> 00:09:18,427
Now you can't remember
what's going to happen next!
222
00:09:18,492 --> 00:09:20,162
Well played, Pitstop.
223
00:09:20,228 --> 00:09:23,028
Time to eviscerate everyone's
existence into the ether!
224
00:09:23,096 --> 00:09:25,996
Mutt-bots! Sic 'em!
225
00:09:26,066 --> 00:09:27,536
Head for the
time machine, I.Q.
226
00:09:27,601 --> 00:09:31,101
This is your chance
to rest the timeline!
227
00:09:31,171 --> 00:09:33,071
(SCREAMS)
228
00:09:33,140 --> 00:09:35,990
Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow.
229
00:09:40,547 --> 00:09:41,577
(ROARS)
230
00:09:41,649 --> 00:09:43,319
It worked.
I'm back in my past.
231
00:09:43,384 --> 00:09:45,924
Or Dastardly's past.
Or wherever!
232
00:09:45,987 --> 00:09:48,487
-Dastardly!
-Gadzooks! Who might you be?
233
00:09:48,556 --> 00:09:50,086
I'm the future Dick Dastardly,
234
00:09:50,157 --> 00:09:51,487
come back to stop you
235
00:09:51,559 --> 00:09:54,059
from making the biggest
mistake of your life!
236
00:09:54,127 --> 00:09:55,797
PETER: Oh, hi, there, I.Q.
Selfie?
237
00:09:55,863 --> 00:09:58,903
Hey, Peter. Let me show you
how to use this time machine.
238
00:09:58,967 --> 00:10:01,437
See this lever that reads
"self destruct"?
239
00:10:01,502 --> 00:10:02,842
That's how you turn it on.
240
00:10:02,904 --> 00:10:05,214
Really? That seems oddly
unnecessary and cryptic.
241
00:10:05,272 --> 00:10:06,472
-Got it!
-Great.
242
00:10:06,540 --> 00:10:08,240
Now, I think Dastardly
needs your help.
243
00:10:08,309 --> 00:10:12,009
He does? Gangway!
I'm coming, old buddy!
244
00:10:12,080 --> 00:10:15,850
Now, I just need someone
to help me operate the time machine.
245
00:10:15,916 --> 00:10:17,316
Say cheese, Dicky.
246
00:10:17,384 --> 00:10:18,654
Speaking of
spoiled dairy products,
247
00:10:18,719 --> 00:10:20,119
have you changed
your aftershave?
248
00:10:20,187 --> 00:10:22,257
Listen to me,
you Herculean half-wit.
249
00:10:22,323 --> 00:10:24,363
I need your feckless fingers
250
00:10:24,425 --> 00:10:26,655
to facilitate my flight
to the future!
251
00:10:26,726 --> 00:10:28,596
Okay.
252
00:10:28,662 --> 00:10:29,902
(EXPLOSION)
253
00:10:29,964 --> 00:10:32,674
What? But if the time machine
is destroyed
254
00:10:32,733 --> 00:10:35,603
then I could never use it
to come back from the future!
255
00:10:35,670 --> 00:10:37,870
I.Q. CLONES: Neither could we!
256
00:10:37,938 --> 00:10:39,168
Hi, y'all. What's going on?
257
00:10:39,239 --> 00:10:40,609
A recursive time loop
paradox reset.
258
00:10:40,675 --> 00:10:42,235
Oh, and my ice cream is back.
259
00:10:42,310 --> 00:10:46,150
Well, you can bet I'll never
build another time machine.
260
00:10:46,213 --> 00:10:47,383
Yes, you will,
261
00:10:47,448 --> 00:10:49,478
which causes the future
to be conquered
262
00:10:49,550 --> 00:10:54,550
by genetically engineered
time-traveling Octo-Muttleys.
263
00:10:55,623 --> 00:10:57,963
-But... But...
-Drat.
264
00:10:58,025 --> 00:11:01,355
(SNICKERING)
265
00:11:01,428 --> 00:11:03,628
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
266
00:11:03,678 --> 00:11:08,228
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