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Adult Adam: For every family,
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00:00:02,571 --> 00:00:04,988
Thanksgiving is
a day filled with tradition.
3
00:00:04,989 --> 00:00:06,390
But for the Goldbergs,
4
00:00:06,391 --> 00:00:09,393
that tradition came
with an extra helping of crazy.
5
00:00:09,394 --> 00:00:11,194
Every year, my mom would
cheese and marshmallow
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00:00:11,195 --> 00:00:13,230
everything in sight.
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00:00:13,231 --> 00:00:15,332
Every year, my brother would
gorge himself on half a turkey
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00:00:15,333 --> 00:00:17,434
and pass out in a food coma.
9
00:00:17,435 --> 00:00:20,003
Every year, I'd bond with
my dad over a game of football
10
00:00:20,004 --> 00:00:22,639
and astound him with
my total lack of knowledge.
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00:00:22,640 --> 00:00:24,241
It's like the throwing one knows
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00:00:24,242 --> 00:00:26,076
exactly where the running one is going.
13
00:00:27,445 --> 00:00:29,413
Every year, pops would give a tipsy toast
14
00:00:29,414 --> 00:00:30,714
about an old girlfriend.
15
00:00:30,715 --> 00:00:32,816
And, sure, I wake up every morning,
16
00:00:32,817 --> 00:00:36,019
and I wonder, "what if I stayed
with her in Singapore
17
00:00:36,020 --> 00:00:38,755
and learned her exotic customs?"
18
00:00:38,756 --> 00:00:41,358
Point is we all make our choices.
19
00:00:41,359 --> 00:00:44,288
- To family.
- All: To family.
20
00:00:44,289 --> 00:00:47,028
Every year, my eccentric
uncle Marvin would visit...
21
00:00:47,029 --> 00:00:48,931
Delorean!
22
00:00:48,932 --> 00:00:50,566
Get in a huge fight with my dad...
23
00:00:50,567 --> 00:00:53,202
Come on! I'm not staying
where I'm not wanted!
24
00:00:53,203 --> 00:00:55,137
And storm out with one of our pies.
25
00:00:55,138 --> 00:00:56,272
Good day to you, sir!
26
00:00:56,273 --> 00:00:57,607
Good day to you!
27
00:00:57,608 --> 00:00:59,308
And every year, my mom would force Erica
28
00:00:59,309 --> 00:01:01,344
to spend days prepping
and cooking with her.
29
00:01:01,345 --> 00:01:06,348
This sacred recipe box was your
Nana's most prized possession,
30
00:01:06,349 --> 00:01:09,151
and we will continue the tradition
31
00:01:09,152 --> 00:01:12,554
by firing up the stove
by 5:00 A.M. sharp tomorrow.
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00:01:12,555 --> 00:01:15,491
And if all goes smoothly, by 9:00 A.M.,
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00:01:15,492 --> 00:01:18,260
we'll be elbow deep
in a 20-pound butterball.
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00:01:18,261 --> 00:01:20,062
Or we nuke some hungry-man dinners
35
00:01:20,063 --> 00:01:21,230
and call it a day.
36
00:01:21,231 --> 00:01:23,232
Wow. I didn't know you were in the business
37
00:01:23,233 --> 00:01:26,068
of destroying all your Nana's
favorite things.
38
00:01:26,069 --> 00:01:28,504
You know, while you're at it,
why don't you just smash
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00:01:28,505 --> 00:01:30,439
her precious figurine collection,
40
00:01:30,440 --> 00:01:33,842
smash everything she loved,
take this poker,
41
00:01:33,843 --> 00:01:36,512
and smash my face in?
Because Nana loved this, too.
42
00:01:36,513 --> 00:01:38,680
My God, I'll just cook the stupid meal.
43
00:01:38,681 --> 00:01:39,748
Yay!
44
00:01:39,749 --> 00:01:41,483
Oh, we're gonna have so much fun.
45
00:01:41,484 --> 00:01:43,185
And it wasn't a Goldberg Thanksgiving
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00:01:43,186 --> 00:01:44,920
unless my mom tripled up her workouts
47
00:01:44,921 --> 00:01:49,223
so she could justify gorging
herself for 24 hours straight.
48
00:01:49,224 --> 00:01:52,693
(Singsong voice) Who's ready
for some jazzercise?
49
00:01:52,694 --> 00:01:53,795
People with no shame?
50
00:01:54,283 --> 00:01:55,250
Hey.
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00:01:56,131 --> 00:01:58,733
Come on, lazy buns.
Let's earn that stuffing.
52
00:01:58,734 --> 00:02:02,804
(Up-tempo music plays)
53
00:02:02,805 --> 00:02:04,472
♪ Come on, come on ♪
54
00:02:04,473 --> 00:02:06,107
♪ and work that boogie body ♪
55
00:02:06,108 --> 00:02:08,409
And whoo! Whoo! Whoo!
56
00:02:08,410 --> 00:02:09,677
Join in!
57
00:02:09,678 --> 00:02:11,946
Oh, I'd like to, but I'm lying.
58
00:02:12,914 --> 00:02:14,514
Well, make fun all you want,
59
00:02:14,515 --> 00:02:16,717
but you wouldn't last a minute in my class.
60
00:02:16,718 --> 00:02:18,285
I get the feeling I'd manage.
61
00:02:18,286 --> 00:02:19,920
Put your money where your mouth is.
62
00:02:19,921 --> 00:02:21,221
Come to class with me.
63
00:02:21,222 --> 00:02:23,824
When you collapse halfway
through from exhaustion,
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00:02:23,825 --> 00:02:25,258
I win.
65
00:02:25,259 --> 00:02:28,028
And then, we jazzercise
three days a week for a month.
66
00:02:28,029 --> 00:02:29,429
So, somehow, this has become a ploy
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00:02:29,430 --> 00:02:30,630
to get me to hang with you.
68
00:02:30,631 --> 00:02:32,265
It is moving in that direction, yes.
69
00:02:32,266 --> 00:02:34,768
Well, when I prove you wrong and do finish,
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00:02:34,769 --> 00:02:37,537
I don't have to help you make
Thanksgiving dinner this year.
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00:02:38,066 --> 00:02:40,601
- Deal.
- You ready for this?
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00:02:41,275 --> 00:02:43,343
Look at me. I'm jazzercising.
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00:02:43,344 --> 00:02:45,679
I'm a sad mom with no shame.
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00:02:45,680 --> 00:02:48,081
No, don't join in. I'm mocking you.
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00:02:48,082 --> 00:02:49,916
♪ I'm twisted up inside ♪
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00:02:49,917 --> 00:02:53,453
♪ but nonetheless I feel the need to say ♪
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The Goldbergs - 02x07
"A Goldberg Thanksgiving"
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00:02:55,923 --> 00:02:57,591
♪ I don't know the future ♪
79
00:02:57,592 --> 00:03:01,461
♪ but the past keeps getting
clearer every day ♪
80
00:03:01,462 --> 00:03:03,964
It was November 22, 1980-something,
81
00:03:03,965 --> 00:03:06,699
and I was spending the day
with my friend, video games.
82
00:03:06,700 --> 00:03:08,735
We had quite a history together.
83
00:03:08,736 --> 00:03:10,136
First, there was Atari.
84
00:03:10,137 --> 00:03:11,771
(Video game beeping)
Adam: Look at those graphics.
85
00:03:11,772 --> 00:03:14,574
I'll never get bored of this... ever.
86
00:03:14,575 --> 00:03:18,244
Then, there was Intellivision.
87
00:03:18,781 --> 00:03:21,881
It's like I'm skiing in real life.
88
00:03:21,882 --> 00:03:25,118
(Blows) And then came the
greatest console of them all,
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00:03:25,119 --> 00:03:26,052
Nintendo.
90
00:03:27,071 --> 00:03:29,322
Yes! First place!
91
00:03:29,323 --> 00:03:30,764
What is this? What am I looking at?
92
00:03:30,765 --> 00:03:33,026
It's "Track & Field."
I just won a gold medal.
93
00:03:33,027 --> 00:03:35,729
A video game with people
running and jumping.
94
00:03:35,730 --> 00:03:36,863
Why don't you go outside
95
00:03:36,864 --> 00:03:38,698
and run and jump like a regular kid?
96
00:03:38,699 --> 00:03:41,034
(Groans) You never like the stuff I like.
97
00:03:41,035 --> 00:03:42,669
Why don't you play with the boy?
98
00:03:42,670 --> 00:03:45,672
No can do. Gives me finger cramps.
99
00:03:45,673 --> 00:03:49,042
And I need these hands
to massage the ladies' feet.
100
00:03:49,043 --> 00:03:50,410
It's his closer.
101
00:03:50,411 --> 00:03:53,179
All right, this conversation's
been bad from top to bottom.
102
00:03:53,180 --> 00:03:54,881
My dad may not have understood me,
103
00:03:54,882 --> 00:03:57,117
but Thanksgiving meant
the arrival of someone who did.
104
00:03:57,118 --> 00:03:58,952
Did someone call the butcher?
105
00:03:58,953 --> 00:04:00,620
'Cause the beefcake has arrived.
106
00:04:00,621 --> 00:04:02,555
- Okay.
- "Mur-man," bring it in here.
107
00:04:02,556 --> 00:04:04,224
- Bro, ooh, I love-a this face.
- Ohh.
108
00:04:04,225 --> 00:04:05,325
- I love it.
- Stop!
109
00:04:05,326 --> 00:04:06,526
Sorry.
110
00:04:06,527 --> 00:04:08,328
(Sighs) What's with the outfit?
111
00:04:08,329 --> 00:04:10,497
It's actually the
Crockett n' Tubbs collection.
112
00:04:10,498 --> 00:04:12,632
The ladies love it.
It's the white linen, man.
113
00:04:12,633 --> 00:04:13,800
You want to feel it?
114
00:04:13,801 --> 00:04:15,301
- No.
- Come on. Feel it.
115
00:04:15,302 --> 00:04:16,636
- No.
- Just feel it!
116
00:04:16,637 --> 00:04:18,304
- Uncle Marv!
- (Laughing) Hey!
117
00:04:18,305 --> 00:04:20,473
- What's up?
- Hey, buddy.
118
00:04:20,474 --> 00:04:22,809
- Uncle Marv!
- Look at this kid! (Laughs)
119
00:04:22,810 --> 00:04:24,010
Looking good, dude.
120
00:04:24,011 --> 00:04:26,079
I'm feeling good, dude.
I lost half a pound.
121
00:04:26,080 --> 00:04:28,314
And then they bumped me up
to assistant manager
122
00:04:28,315 --> 00:04:30,083
down at the Beeper Bayou in Trenton.
123
00:04:30,084 --> 00:04:32,051
You sell beepers now? No way.
124
00:04:32,052 --> 00:04:34,721
Oh, yeah. Growth industry.
Wave of the future.
125
00:04:34,722 --> 00:04:36,723
I'm gonna ride that wave
right into retirement.
126
00:04:36,724 --> 00:04:38,725
Free samples? Bing!
127
00:04:38,726 --> 00:04:40,193
We get free beepers?! Yes!
128
00:04:40,194 --> 00:04:42,428
So impractical for a child.
129
00:04:42,429 --> 00:04:43,997
No. You can't give them beepers.
130
00:04:43,998 --> 00:04:45,431
They look like drug dealers.
131
00:04:45,432 --> 00:04:47,934
No, they look like doctors.
(Chuckling) Come on.
132
00:04:47,935 --> 00:04:49,669
I'm gonna go page myself for no reason.
133
00:04:49,670 --> 00:04:51,871
That's the spirit. Look at this kid.
134
00:04:51,872 --> 00:04:53,373
Okay. Let's get you set up.
135
00:04:53,374 --> 00:04:56,709
Where's your garbage bag full
of laundry for my wife to do?
136
00:04:56,710 --> 00:04:58,646
No, no, no. I'm fine for this visit.
137
00:04:58,647 --> 00:05:00,783
I'm staying in a hotel down in Abington.
138
00:05:00,784 --> 00:05:02,052
"Hotel"?
139
00:05:02,053 --> 00:05:03,616
With an "H," not an "M"?
140
00:05:03,617 --> 00:05:05,472
Yeah. It's got all the perks, man.
141
00:05:05,473 --> 00:05:07,621
Uncle Marv, you want to go play
"Double Dragon" with me?
142
00:05:07,622 --> 00:05:09,823
Nintendo Power Magazine said it
wasn't coming out till January.
143
00:05:09,824 --> 00:05:11,658
You read NP monthly?
What, are you kidding me?
144
00:05:11,659 --> 00:05:13,493
That's how I get all my news, kid.
145
00:05:13,494 --> 00:05:14,995
Let's go. Get the hell in there!
146
00:05:14,996 --> 00:05:17,397
While my dad was trying to
keep his cool with his brother,
147
00:05:17,398 --> 00:05:20,834
my mom was about to turn up
the heat in jazzercise class.
148
00:05:20,835 --> 00:05:23,003
Dear Lord, it's like
a "Twilight zone" world
149
00:05:23,004 --> 00:05:24,137
where everyone is you.
150
00:05:24,138 --> 00:05:26,139
Just zip it and go put on
your workout gear.
151
00:05:26,140 --> 00:05:28,341
This is my workout gear.
152
00:05:28,342 --> 00:05:32,112
(Laughs)
153
00:05:32,113 --> 00:05:34,347
That's what you're gonna wear
to get in the groove?
154
00:05:34,348 --> 00:05:35,482
Are you insane?
155
00:05:35,483 --> 00:05:37,384
Some might say what
you're wearing is insane.
156
00:05:37,385 --> 00:05:40,954
For your information,
spandex wicks away sweat
157
00:05:40,955 --> 00:05:43,256
while enhancing muscle tone
and skeletal girth.
158
00:05:43,257 --> 00:05:44,691
Watch and learn.
159
00:05:44,692 --> 00:05:46,259
You ladies ready to sweat?!
160
00:05:46,260 --> 00:05:47,394
All: Yeah!
161
00:05:47,395 --> 00:05:49,029
Reynaldo's an ex-marine.
162
00:05:49,030 --> 00:05:50,564
I told him not to go easy on us.
163
00:05:50,565 --> 00:05:52,630
Okay, you didn't tell me...
164
00:05:52,631 --> 00:05:54,333
Sorry. A bet's a bet.
165
00:05:54,334 --> 00:05:55,835
That's a deal that can't be broken.
166
00:05:55,836 --> 00:05:58,104
My sister was starting to realize
167
00:05:58,105 --> 00:05:59,572
that she might have
gotten in over her head.
168
00:05:59,573 --> 00:06:01,107
(Upbeat music plays)
169
00:06:01,108 --> 00:06:04,010
For the next hour, my mom
lunged, squatted, and grooved
170
00:06:04,011 --> 00:06:05,411
with everything she had.
171
00:06:05,412 --> 00:06:07,446
And Erica...
172
00:06:07,447 --> 00:06:08,981
Eh, she was fine.
173
00:06:08,982 --> 00:06:11,884
And cool down.
174
00:06:11,885 --> 00:06:12,985
Whew! (Laughs)
175
00:06:12,986 --> 00:06:14,654
I almost broke a sweat there.
176
00:06:15,174 --> 00:06:17,355
But... you...
177
00:06:17,356 --> 00:06:18,624
I won.
178
00:06:18,625 --> 00:06:21,193
Now I don't have to spend time
cooking with you all day.
179
00:06:21,194 --> 00:06:22,828
It's a Thanksgiving miracle.
180
00:06:22,829 --> 00:06:24,496
But it's tradition.
181
00:06:24,497 --> 00:06:26,298
Mm, sorry. Bet's a bet.
182
00:06:26,299 --> 00:06:29,234
That's a deal that can't be broken.
183
00:06:29,235 --> 00:06:30,969
As my mom's Thanksgiving was falling apart,
184
00:06:30,970 --> 00:06:33,739
I was having a blast with my uncle.
185
00:06:33,740 --> 00:06:35,808
Marvin: Oh, my gosh.
You're like rain man with this.
186
00:06:36,307 --> 00:06:38,209
You're unbeatable.
Like, what is your secret?
187
00:06:38,210 --> 00:06:39,778
I have a small social circle.
188
00:06:39,779 --> 00:06:41,246
After three awesome hours of video games,
189
00:06:41,247 --> 00:06:43,515
we needed a break.
190
00:06:43,516 --> 00:06:45,450
So we went to see a movie
about video games,
191
00:06:45,451 --> 00:06:47,586
"The Wizard," a classic '80s drama
192
00:06:47,587 --> 00:06:49,387
about a boy who wins a fortune
193
00:06:49,388 --> 00:06:51,189
in the world's biggest
video-game competition.
194
00:06:51,190 --> 00:06:53,658
I love the Power Glove.
195
00:06:53,659 --> 00:06:54,826
It's so bad.
196
00:06:54,827 --> 00:06:56,428
You know it's based on a true story?
197
00:06:56,429 --> 00:06:59,464
I'm pretty sure everything
in this movie is fake.
198
00:06:59,465 --> 00:07:01,900
Look, I'm the adult, okay?
So I'm always right.
199
00:07:01,901 --> 00:07:05,437
Just eat your popcorn.
It makes your brain grow.
200
00:07:06,171 --> 00:07:08,072
That movie was so awesome!
201
00:07:08,073 --> 00:07:09,474
Oh, man.
202
00:07:09,475 --> 00:07:11,676
And you're such a better player
than that mute kid.
203
00:07:11,677 --> 00:07:12,977
Oh, man, if I were you,
204
00:07:12,978 --> 00:07:15,079
I would consider dropping
out of school altogether
205
00:07:15,080 --> 00:07:17,513
and just playing video games full time.
206
00:07:17,514 --> 00:07:19,149
No. Nobody's quitting school.
207
00:07:19,150 --> 00:07:20,884
I'm just trying to encourage your son.
208
00:07:20,885 --> 00:07:22,052
To drop out.
209
00:07:22,053 --> 00:07:23,420
It's a figure of speech, mur.
210
00:07:23,421 --> 00:07:25,389
It's like, "hey,
it's raining cats and dogs,"
211
00:07:25,390 --> 00:07:27,124
or, "you can't drink in the park here."
212
00:07:27,125 --> 00:07:29,059
Can't you just not be you for once?
213
00:07:29,060 --> 00:07:30,494
(Groans) Fine.
214
00:07:30,495 --> 00:07:32,363
How about I don't encourage him
to be better at anything?
215
00:07:32,364 --> 00:07:33,997
(Sighs) That's all I'm asking. (Sighs)
216
00:07:33,998 --> 00:07:35,933
Well, buddy, you're gonna have to
217
00:07:35,934 --> 00:07:37,968
listen to your old man on this one.
218
00:07:37,969 --> 00:07:39,770
But not I. I bought you something.
219
00:07:39,771 --> 00:07:41,972
Consider it an early
birthday present, okay?
220
00:07:41,973 --> 00:07:44,041
Or a late one, depending on
when your birthday is.
221
00:07:45,243 --> 00:07:49,179
(Vocalizes angelically)
222
00:07:49,180 --> 00:07:50,914
No way.
223
00:07:50,915 --> 00:07:52,049
Yes way. (Choir vocalizes)
224
00:07:52,050 --> 00:07:53,484
It was the Nintendo Power Glove.
225
00:07:53,485 --> 00:07:56,120
It was magical, and it was mine.
226
00:07:56,121 --> 00:07:59,156
I...Can't take this. I-it's too much.
227
00:07:59,157 --> 00:08:00,424
With my guidance,
228
00:08:00,425 --> 00:08:02,593
you are going to become the greatest player
229
00:08:02,594 --> 00:08:04,228
that the Nintendo universe has ever seen.
230
00:08:04,229 --> 00:08:07,698
With my help, there will be
no "Mario" pipe un-searched,
231
00:08:07,699 --> 00:08:10,968
no space un-invaded, no donkey un-konged!
232
00:08:10,969 --> 00:08:13,036
You maniac. (Laughs)
233
00:08:13,037 --> 00:08:14,538
What's he up to, Al?
234
00:08:14,539 --> 00:08:16,874
Laughing, having fun, supporting Adam...
235
00:08:16,875 --> 00:08:18,208
It doesn't make any sense.
236
00:08:18,209 --> 00:08:20,043
Uh, I think he's just laughing
237
00:08:20,044 --> 00:08:21,979
and having fun and supporting Adam.
238
00:08:22,623 --> 00:08:24,658
That's crazy. Nobody does that.
239
00:08:25,049 --> 00:08:28,885
Do you think maybe you're
a little tiny bit jealous
240
00:08:28,886 --> 00:08:31,387
of the connection
your brother has with your son?
241
00:08:31,388 --> 00:08:33,556
Me? Jealous of Marvin?
242
00:08:33,557 --> 00:08:35,725
The man who claims
to have invented the rectangle.
243
00:08:35,726 --> 00:08:36,793
(Scoffs)
244
00:08:36,794 --> 00:08:38,261
But for the first time ever,
245
00:08:38,262 --> 00:08:42,432
uncle Marvin had something
my dad didn't have... me.
246
00:08:42,433 --> 00:08:43,399
(Laughter)
247
00:08:44,520 --> 00:08:47,020
It was Thanksgiving morning,
and my dad decided
248
00:08:47,021 --> 00:08:49,055
to connect with me
for the best reason possible...
249
00:08:49,056 --> 00:08:51,290
To stop his brother from doing it.
250
00:08:51,291 --> 00:08:52,792
Hey, champ. What you up to?
251
00:08:52,793 --> 00:08:54,059
I'm watching The Parade.
252
00:08:54,060 --> 00:08:56,228
Snoopy Balloon's catching
a pretty heavy breeze.
253
00:08:56,229 --> 00:08:57,530
Good stuff.
254
00:08:57,531 --> 00:09:00,332
Hey, how would you like
to play some video games.
255
00:09:00,333 --> 00:09:02,902
You know, like "Froggerman"
or "Donkey Kid."
256
00:09:02,903 --> 00:09:05,037
You want to play video games?
257
00:09:05,038 --> 00:09:07,540
Oh, yeah! I love video games.
258
00:09:08,207 --> 00:09:09,641
They're not a waste of time,
259
00:09:09,642 --> 00:09:13,445
and you learn valuable lessons,
even though they're dumb.
260
00:09:13,446 --> 00:09:15,714
(Electronic music plays) Not working.
261
00:09:15,715 --> 00:09:17,182
The damn thing's not working!
262
00:09:17,183 --> 00:09:19,184
You're swinging it. Stop swinging.
263
00:09:19,185 --> 00:09:20,819
I'm batting? I thought I was pitching.
264
00:09:20,820 --> 00:09:23,655
What are you doing? Just move
like a normal human would.
265
00:09:23,656 --> 00:09:24,856
What's wrong with my guy?
266
00:09:24,857 --> 00:09:26,191
Why is he squatting?
It looks like he's sick.
267
00:09:26,192 --> 00:09:28,226
He's just bunting. Stop bunting!
268
00:09:28,227 --> 00:09:29,828
I can't stop bunting!
269
00:09:29,829 --> 00:09:31,897
Just push the "pause" button. Well,
which is the "pause" button?
270
00:09:31,898 --> 00:09:36,034
Stop mashing the buttons
with your giant sausage fingers.
271
00:09:36,035 --> 00:09:38,435
Okay! Now you're aggravating me!
272
00:09:38,436 --> 00:09:39,970
Get this off of me!
273
00:09:39,971 --> 00:09:42,773
It's stuck on my normal-sized fingers!
274
00:09:42,774 --> 00:09:44,108
No... be gentle.
275
00:09:44,109 --> 00:09:46,977
No! No!
276
00:09:46,978 --> 00:09:48,078
You broke it!
277
00:09:48,079 --> 00:09:50,447
You broke my favorite thing in the world!
278
00:09:50,448 --> 00:09:52,049
You ruin everything!
279
00:09:53,418 --> 00:09:55,953
As my father took a big swing and missed,
280
00:09:55,954 --> 00:09:58,589
my mother was feeling
the effects of her own loss.
281
00:09:58,590 --> 00:10:01,191
Whoa. I slept for 12 hours.
282
00:10:01,192 --> 00:10:02,493
You know when you get too much sleep
283
00:10:02,494 --> 00:10:03,961
and then you're tired?
284
00:10:03,962 --> 00:10:05,062
I might need a nap later.
285
00:10:05,063 --> 00:10:06,664
I slept for two hours,
286
00:10:06,665 --> 00:10:08,298
had a nightmare that I'd abandoned you,
287
00:10:08,299 --> 00:10:09,867
and then I woke up and remembered
288
00:10:09,868 --> 00:10:11,669
that you'd abandoned me. (Chuckles)
289
00:10:11,670 --> 00:10:14,338
So I just came downstairs to
start this entire meal by myself
290
00:10:14,339 --> 00:10:15,806
like some sort of daughterless mother.
291
00:10:15,807 --> 00:10:17,408
So, we're both good then?
292
00:10:17,409 --> 00:10:19,043
Double or nothing!
Let's go double or nothing.
293
00:10:19,044 --> 00:10:22,178
- Give me a chance to win you back.
- Please stop.
294
00:10:22,179 --> 00:10:25,248
If I win, you have to cook
Thanksgiving dinner with me
295
00:10:25,249 --> 00:10:29,152
and learn all my traditions
and never leave my side.
296
00:10:29,153 --> 00:10:30,520
Fine.
297
00:10:30,521 --> 00:10:32,756
But if I win, I get to avoid
this craziness altogether
298
00:10:32,757 --> 00:10:34,357
and go to Lainey's for Thanksgiving.
299
00:10:35,025 --> 00:10:36,626
- You wouldn't.
- I would.
300
00:10:36,627 --> 00:10:39,061
And her family eats their dinner
in front of the TV.
301
00:10:39,062 --> 00:10:40,563
It's both sad and awesome.
302
00:10:40,564 --> 00:10:44,433
Deal. But this time, no jazzercise.
303
00:10:44,434 --> 00:10:46,235
We're gonna power walk.
304
00:10:46,236 --> 00:10:47,803
You mean that non-running thing
you do every morning?
305
00:10:47,804 --> 00:10:49,105
(Chuckles)
306
00:10:49,106 --> 00:10:51,607
Did you know that the
world's fastest power walker
307
00:10:51,608 --> 00:10:53,345
out-walked a cheetah?
308
00:10:53,346 --> 00:10:55,401
Yeah, that's not true.
309
00:10:56,647 --> 00:10:58,114
Barry: Ankle weights on!
310
00:10:58,115 --> 00:11:01,950
Okay, power walking has one
and only one rule...
311
00:11:01,951 --> 00:11:03,852
At least one foot must be
in contact with the ground
312
00:11:04,177 --> 00:11:05,357
at all times.
313
00:11:05,358 --> 00:11:06,803
Otherwise, it would just be running,
314
00:11:06,804 --> 00:11:08,205
which makes way more sense,
315
00:11:08,206 --> 00:11:09,772
but this is what you guys want to do,
316
00:11:09,773 --> 00:11:10,859
so it is what it is.
317
00:11:10,860 --> 00:11:13,628
First one around the block wins.
318
00:11:13,629 --> 00:11:15,396
And...
319
00:11:15,397 --> 00:11:16,531
Walk!
320
00:11:16,532 --> 00:11:18,466
Some say it was Carl Lewis
321
00:11:18,467 --> 00:11:19,934
who ran the most epic race in the '80s.
322
00:11:19,935 --> 00:11:21,703
But in our family, it was this.
323
00:11:21,704 --> 00:11:24,506
Stop! Stop power walking into my body!
324
00:11:24,507 --> 00:11:26,307
The Bevernator stops for no one.
325
00:11:26,308 --> 00:11:27,275
Oops. Hey.
326
00:11:27,276 --> 00:11:28,309
(Chuckles) Slipped up.
327
00:11:28,310 --> 00:11:29,777
You stepped in dog poop.
328
00:11:29,778 --> 00:11:31,012
(Sighs) Nice try.
329
00:11:31,013 --> 00:11:32,347
No, I'm serious.
330
00:11:32,348 --> 00:11:34,282
Really?
331
00:11:34,283 --> 00:11:35,450
Oh!
332
00:11:35,451 --> 00:11:37,719
That was low!
333
00:11:37,720 --> 00:11:39,554
That was low!
334
00:11:42,925 --> 00:11:44,192
Erica: Keep one foot on the ground!
335
00:11:44,193 --> 00:11:45,426
You keep one foot on the ground!
336
00:11:45,986 --> 00:11:48,662
You're running. That's against the rules.
337
00:11:48,663 --> 00:11:50,297
But I'll allow it 'cause I don't care.
338
00:11:50,298 --> 00:11:51,432
Take that!
339
00:11:51,433 --> 00:11:54,701
Yes! Yes! I won!
340
00:11:54,702 --> 00:11:56,837
Beverly: Ow.
341
00:11:56,838 --> 00:11:58,172
Oh, it hurts.
342
00:11:58,173 --> 00:11:59,440
(Groaning) Ow!
343
00:11:59,441 --> 00:12:01,875
Something happened in my downstairs.
344
00:12:01,876 --> 00:12:03,577
It's just north of my vajingo.
345
00:12:03,578 --> 00:12:05,879
Ow!
346
00:12:05,880 --> 00:12:08,115
Murray: How's your groin?
347
00:12:08,116 --> 00:12:10,017
It hurts.
348
00:12:10,018 --> 00:12:12,953
But not as bad as my heart.
349
00:12:12,954 --> 00:12:15,720
I lost her, Murray. I lost our little girl.
350
00:12:15,721 --> 00:12:16,956
I get it.
351
00:12:16,957 --> 00:12:18,925
The kids would much rather
see their friends,
352
00:12:18,926 --> 00:12:22,028
play video games, hang out
with your dumb-ass brother.
353
00:12:22,029 --> 00:12:23,329
Are we still talking about me?
354
00:12:23,330 --> 00:12:25,031
I got a thing, too. I'm allowed.
355
00:12:25,399 --> 00:12:26,466
Well, not today.
356
00:12:26,467 --> 00:12:27,900
Help me over to that office chair
357
00:12:27,901 --> 00:12:29,302
so I can roll around.
358
00:12:29,303 --> 00:12:32,505
Bevy, you can't cook
Thanksgiving in a roller chair.
359
00:12:32,506 --> 00:12:34,173
I have to try.
360
00:12:34,174 --> 00:12:35,742
Ow! Ow. Ow.
361
00:12:36,109 --> 00:12:37,243
That's it.
362
00:12:37,244 --> 00:12:38,744
We'll order Chinese.
363
00:12:38,745 --> 00:12:40,646
Oh, no, you won't!
364
00:12:40,647 --> 00:12:42,214
The stakes are too high.
(Inspirational music plays)
365
00:12:42,215 --> 00:12:43,683
I need this meal.
366
00:12:43,684 --> 00:12:47,086
I need to be knocked
motionless by meat and gravy.
367
00:12:47,087 --> 00:12:48,721
I need to eat until my pants grow tight
368
00:12:48,722 --> 00:12:51,390
and I move into elastic sweats.
369
00:12:52,058 --> 00:12:55,327
Will I ever touch that weird,
gloppy cranberry thing?
370
00:12:55,328 --> 00:12:56,962
Probably not.
371
00:12:56,963 --> 00:12:59,865
But I deserve to find out.
372
00:12:59,866 --> 00:13:03,101
Give me this. Give me Thanksgiving.
373
00:13:03,102 --> 00:13:05,704
I'm sorry, love bug. I tried, but I can't.
374
00:13:05,705 --> 00:13:07,706
My groin is out of commission.
375
00:13:07,707 --> 00:13:10,509
Then let me be your groin.
376
00:13:12,879 --> 00:13:14,146
(Smoke alarm blaring)
377
00:13:14,147 --> 00:13:15,647
You're burning the rolls.
378
00:13:15,648 --> 00:13:18,850
I didn't say 600. I said 375.
379
00:13:19,518 --> 00:13:21,953
Ohh! I'm not a scientist!
380
00:13:21,954 --> 00:13:23,888
(Blaring stops)
(Sighs) Oh, this is hopeless.
381
00:13:23,889 --> 00:13:25,356
You haven't even cleaned the Turkey yet.
382
00:13:25,357 --> 00:13:28,559
I told you... I'm not reaching
my hand in a Turkey's butt!
383
00:13:28,560 --> 00:13:29,827
No way!
384
00:13:29,828 --> 00:13:31,862
It's not that big a deal. Just do it.
385
00:13:31,863 --> 00:13:33,631
(Squish)
386
00:13:33,632 --> 00:13:34,665
Oh, no.
387
00:13:34,666 --> 00:13:36,400
Oh, it's all cold and rubbery!
388
00:13:36,401 --> 00:13:39,370
Aah! I touched something wet!
I touched something wet!
389
00:13:39,371 --> 00:13:40,771
Well, do something.
390
00:13:41,740 --> 00:13:43,541
I'll use the nerd glove.
391
00:13:43,542 --> 00:13:45,576
(Grunts)
392
00:13:45,577 --> 00:13:47,011
Don't worry, champ.
393
00:13:47,012 --> 00:13:48,212
I'll get that Power Glove fixed
for you no problem...
394
00:13:48,213 --> 00:13:50,381
Ohh, boy. It's in the butt.
395
00:13:51,816 --> 00:13:54,418
Why? Why?!
396
00:13:54,419 --> 00:13:56,220
Okay, so, I know that it's Thanksgiving,
397
00:13:56,221 --> 00:13:58,956
and I want to say what I'm thankful for.
398
00:13:58,957 --> 00:14:00,524
My freedom. I'm leaving now.
399
00:14:00,958 --> 00:14:02,860
Please, Erica. I need you.
400
00:14:02,861 --> 00:14:05,462
I love Barry, but he ruins everything.
401
00:14:05,463 --> 00:14:07,097
She's right. I suck.
402
00:14:07,098 --> 00:14:09,399
What's going on? What did Marvin do now?
403
00:14:09,400 --> 00:14:10,767
I'm just here dealing
with the glove in the butt.
404
00:14:10,768 --> 00:14:11,702
Why you got to accuse me of stuff?
405
00:14:12,135 --> 00:14:13,203
I'll tell you why.
406
00:14:13,204 --> 00:14:14,471
Because you've always got an angle.
407
00:14:14,472 --> 00:14:16,106
You got some kind of grift going on.
408
00:14:16,107 --> 00:14:17,507
I get caught grifting three times,
409
00:14:17,941 --> 00:14:19,776
and he's never gonna let me
forget it already.
410
00:14:19,777 --> 00:14:21,144
Just let him forget it already.
411
00:14:21,145 --> 00:14:22,745
You brainwashed the kid, too.
412
00:14:22,746 --> 00:14:25,381
I don't want you two spending
any more time together.
413
00:14:25,382 --> 00:14:26,683
Oh, well, then you're
really not gonna like us
414
00:14:26,684 --> 00:14:27,984
traveling around the country together
415
00:14:27,985 --> 00:14:29,586
competing in Nintendo Championships!
416
00:14:29,587 --> 00:14:30,887
- What?
- Adam: Like in "The Wizard."
417
00:14:30,888 --> 00:14:32,355
He wants to take me town to town
418
00:14:32,356 --> 00:14:33,790
to hustle people in video games.
419
00:14:33,791 --> 00:14:36,126
It's win-win... if he wins.
420
00:14:36,127 --> 00:14:39,095
This has been fun, but, uh,
where are my car keys, mom?
421
00:14:39,096 --> 00:14:40,130
How should I know?
422
00:14:40,131 --> 00:14:41,664
- Open your hand.
- No.
423
00:14:41,665 --> 00:14:43,099
- Open your hand.
- No.
424
00:14:43,100 --> 00:14:45,235
Mom. I shouldn't have to
even say this out loud.
425
00:14:45,236 --> 00:14:49,472
No one here is pursuing
a career in video gaming.
426
00:14:49,473 --> 00:14:50,673
You know, I don't have to take this abuse.
427
00:14:50,674 --> 00:14:51,985
I'm out of here.
428
00:14:51,986 --> 00:14:53,442
No! I got a perfectly good red lobster
429
00:14:53,443 --> 00:14:54,510
right across from my hotel.
430
00:14:54,511 --> 00:14:55,845
Oh, here we go.
431
00:14:55,846 --> 00:14:57,480
Good day to you, sir.
432
00:14:57,481 --> 00:14:59,115
(Door opens, closes)
Good day to you, sir!
433
00:14:59,116 --> 00:15:01,817
No, good day to you, sir!
434
00:15:01,818 --> 00:15:02,985
Okay, you're not going anywhere.
435
00:15:02,986 --> 00:15:03,986
It's Thanksgiving!
436
00:15:03,987 --> 00:15:05,321
- Unacceptable!
- Yes! (Crash)
437
00:15:05,322 --> 00:15:06,956
All of this is unacceptable! I'm free!
438
00:15:06,957 --> 00:15:09,792
Damn it! I dropped the orange potatoes!
439
00:15:09,793 --> 00:15:11,160
Erica, take me with you.
440
00:15:11,161 --> 00:15:12,762
Everybody, stop leaving me.
441
00:15:12,763 --> 00:15:14,296
It's Thanks[Bleep]giving!
442
00:15:14,297 --> 00:15:16,999
Have you been faking it this whole time?
443
00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:20,336
No.
444
00:15:20,337 --> 00:15:22,605
It's a Thanksgiving miracle. (Gasps)
445
00:15:22,606 --> 00:15:24,907
No. I'm not going to Lainey's
for Thanksgiving.
446
00:15:24,908 --> 00:15:26,609
I'm going for the whole weekend.
447
00:15:26,610 --> 00:15:29,145
I got Turkey schmutz on my hand for you.
448
00:15:31,214 --> 00:15:32,882
Now, this feels like Thanksgiving.
449
00:15:34,992 --> 00:15:37,660
Hey, uh...
450
00:15:37,661 --> 00:15:39,895
I wrangled this out of the Turkey butt.
451
00:15:40,863 --> 00:15:42,430
Toweled it off for you.
452
00:15:42,431 --> 00:15:43,765
I don't want it.
453
00:15:43,766 --> 00:15:46,368
Come on.
454
00:15:46,369 --> 00:15:49,304
You can't honestly be angry at me
455
00:15:49,305 --> 00:15:51,673
for not letting you roam around the country
456
00:15:51,674 --> 00:15:52,841
with your uncle.
457
00:15:52,842 --> 00:15:54,609
He'd lose you at the first rest stop.
458
00:15:54,610 --> 00:15:56,077
Well, it's your loss,
459
00:15:56,078 --> 00:15:58,346
'cause I could have been
the champion and won it all...
460
00:15:58,347 --> 00:16:02,684
Money, mansions, yachts,
fast cars, fast women.
461
00:16:02,685 --> 00:16:05,053
I think you may be
overestimating the prizes.
462
00:16:05,054 --> 00:16:06,421
Of course I am!
463
00:16:06,840 --> 00:16:09,708
The world of high-stakes
Nintendo isn't even real.
464
00:16:10,025 --> 00:16:12,960
Then why the hell would you go
along with your uncle?
465
00:16:12,961 --> 00:16:15,963
'Cause it was nice for someone
to actually get me for once.
466
00:16:15,964 --> 00:16:18,266
As this landed with my dad,
467
00:16:18,267 --> 00:16:21,235
my sister was more than ready to take off.
468
00:16:21,236 --> 00:16:23,938
- Going somewhere?
- Aah!
469
00:16:23,939 --> 00:16:25,773
Pops, please.
470
00:16:25,774 --> 00:16:27,742
I don't want to hear one of
your adorable, wise lectures
471
00:16:27,743 --> 00:16:29,644
that makes me a better person.
472
00:16:29,645 --> 00:16:31,212
Fine, I won't mix in.
473
00:16:31,912 --> 00:16:35,816
But did you ever wonder why this
holiday makes your mother so crazy?
474
00:16:35,817 --> 00:16:36,850
'Cause she's crazy?
475
00:16:36,851 --> 00:16:38,752
For sure, but there's a reason
476
00:16:38,753 --> 00:16:40,721
why this day means so much to her.
477
00:16:40,722 --> 00:16:42,022
Because she always made dinner with Nana.
478
00:16:42,023 --> 00:16:43,257
I know all about it.
479
00:16:43,258 --> 00:16:44,558
Well, what you don't know is
480
00:16:44,559 --> 00:16:47,361
that your mom was 17 when she lost Nana.
481
00:16:47,362 --> 00:16:49,596
I didn't realize that.
482
00:16:49,597 --> 00:16:52,666
That box of recipes,
the two of you cooking together,
483
00:16:52,667 --> 00:16:55,269
it all brings back
your grandmother for her.
484
00:16:56,440 --> 00:16:59,677
Why do you always got to
make me a better person?
485
00:16:59,678 --> 00:17:01,277
(John Parr's "St. Elmo's Fire"
[Man in motion] Plays)
486
00:17:01,278 --> 00:17:04,244
(Sighs) Come on.
Let's go have Thanksgiving.
487
00:17:04,245 --> 00:17:06,179
(Dialing) My dad was also
trying to be a better person
488
00:17:06,180 --> 00:17:08,148
by beeping his brother to get him back...
489
00:17:08,149 --> 00:17:11,417
(Beeper beeping)
490
00:17:11,418 --> 00:17:14,354
No matter how far away he was,
491
00:17:14,355 --> 00:17:16,656
which turned out to be very close.
492
00:17:16,657 --> 00:17:18,792
(Beeping continues)
493
00:17:18,793 --> 00:17:20,560
(Beeping stops)
494
00:17:20,561 --> 00:17:23,163
♪ Growing up, you don't see
the writing on the wall ♪
495
00:17:23,164 --> 00:17:26,099
Hey. Mur-man.
496
00:17:26,100 --> 00:17:28,535
What brings you down to
your basement on Thanksgiving?
497
00:17:28,902 --> 00:17:30,937
Beeping! What are you doing here?!
498
00:17:31,370 --> 00:17:33,239
I thought you were staying at a hotel.
499
00:17:33,240 --> 00:17:35,541
I have a perfectly good explanation.
500
00:17:35,542 --> 00:17:37,309
I'm a liar.
501
00:17:37,310 --> 00:17:40,579
But what about the money,
the Beeper Bayou in Trenton?
502
00:17:40,580 --> 00:17:43,382
I got fired. It was totally unfounded.
503
00:17:43,383 --> 00:17:45,117
All I did was sleep with the boss's wife
504
00:17:45,118 --> 00:17:46,485
for, like, a bunch of times.
505
00:17:46,486 --> 00:17:48,988
Everything you do is wrong.
506
00:17:48,989 --> 00:17:51,457
You're right. I just...
507
00:17:51,458 --> 00:17:53,626
I should just stay
as far away from your kid
508
00:17:53,627 --> 00:17:55,227
as humanly possible.
509
00:17:55,228 --> 00:17:57,997
♪ Soldier on, only you can do
what must be done ♪
510
00:17:57,998 --> 00:17:59,799
Well, actually...
511
00:17:59,800 --> 00:18:02,268
That's the one thing
you've been doing right.
512
00:18:02,269 --> 00:18:04,670
And I may have said some things,
513
00:18:04,671 --> 00:18:06,972
and that was only because...
514
00:18:06,973 --> 00:18:08,374
♪ You're just a prisoner, and
you're trying to break free ♪
515
00:18:09,108 --> 00:18:11,043
I, uh... I was jealous.
516
00:18:11,044 --> 00:18:12,978
You were jealous?
517
00:18:12,979 --> 00:18:15,914
I was... jealous. ♪ I can see the new
horizon underneath the blazing sky ♪
518
00:18:15,915 --> 00:18:17,749
Of me?
519
00:18:18,483 --> 00:18:20,018
♪ I'll be where the eagle's flying
higher and higher ♪ I mean, yeah.
520
00:18:20,019 --> 00:18:21,686
I'm the guy who invented the rectangle.
521
00:18:21,687 --> 00:18:24,756
Okay. Are you jealous of anything else?
522
00:18:24,757 --> 00:18:26,557
(Scoffs) Like my cool threads?
523
00:18:26,558 --> 00:18:28,092
- No.
- What about my awesome hairdo?
524
00:18:28,093 --> 00:18:29,260
No, I'm good.
525
00:18:29,261 --> 00:18:30,361
What about the fact
526
00:18:30,362 --> 00:18:32,096
that you're gonna let me borrow $4,000
527
00:18:32,097 --> 00:18:33,431
to invest in a garbage barge?
528
00:18:33,432 --> 00:18:34,699
(Sighs)
529
00:18:34,700 --> 00:18:38,069
Yeah, my uncle still annoyed my dad,
but it was Thanksgiving.
530
00:18:38,070 --> 00:18:39,370
It was a time for forgiving.
531
00:18:39,371 --> 00:18:42,006
♪ I can make it, I know I can ♪
532
00:18:42,007 --> 00:18:43,241
All right.
533
00:18:43,242 --> 00:18:45,009
You get the eggs,
and I'll get the hand mixer.
534
00:18:45,010 --> 00:18:48,212
Shmoopie. You came home.
535
00:18:49,180 --> 00:18:52,616
I guess I didn't want to
miss out on our tradition.
536
00:18:52,617 --> 00:18:54,384
♪ I can see the new horizon
underneath the blazing sky ♪
537
00:18:54,385 --> 00:18:55,519
♪ I'll be where the eagle's
flying higher and higher ♪
538
00:18:55,520 --> 00:18:58,488
Oh, my little Turkey. (Chuckles)
539
00:18:58,489 --> 00:18:59,623
♪ Gonna be your man in motion ♪
540
00:18:59,624 --> 00:19:00,924
I cooked you in my oven.
541
00:19:00,925 --> 00:19:04,061
Okay, come on. Don't make me regret this.
542
00:19:04,062 --> 00:19:05,362
Let's go. We got a family to feed.
543
00:19:05,363 --> 00:19:08,532
Honey, it's too late.
We'd have to start from scratch.
544
00:19:08,533 --> 00:19:10,801
Hey. We are Goldbergs.
545
00:19:10,802 --> 00:19:13,003
And we're gonna kick Thanksgiving's ass.
546
00:19:13,004 --> 00:19:15,138
♪ Burning in me ♪
547
00:19:15,139 --> 00:19:18,141
And they did. That day,
they were in perfect sync.
548
00:19:18,142 --> 00:19:20,210
And it was all my mom ever wanted.
549
00:19:20,211 --> 00:19:22,412
♪ I can feel St. Elmo's fire
burning in me ♪
550
00:19:22,413 --> 00:19:24,548
We did it. (Both laugh)
551
00:19:24,549 --> 00:19:27,351
(Chuckling) We kicked Thanksgiving's ass.
552
00:19:27,352 --> 00:19:28,485
(Glass clinks)
553
00:19:28,486 --> 00:19:31,888
I know I always drink too many Martinis,
554
00:19:31,889 --> 00:19:34,024
and I... give a toast
555
00:19:34,025 --> 00:19:38,261
about some beautiful dame
from my past, but...
556
00:19:38,262 --> 00:19:41,531
This is for my wife, Irene...
557
00:19:41,532 --> 00:19:46,103
The most beautiful dame who ever lived.
558
00:19:46,104 --> 00:19:47,738
♪ Just once in his life ♪
559
00:19:47,739 --> 00:19:49,106
Here, here.
560
00:19:49,107 --> 00:19:50,280
(Chuckles)
561
00:19:50,281 --> 00:19:52,308
And that's a Goldberg Thanksgiving.
562
00:19:52,309 --> 00:19:54,844
- To Lainey.
- We stuck to all of our traditions...
563
00:19:54,845 --> 00:19:56,179
Pops gave his toast,
564
00:19:56,180 --> 00:19:58,815
my dad argued with Marvin at the table,
565
00:19:58,816 --> 00:20:00,617
and Barry ate himself into a coma.
566
00:20:00,618 --> 00:20:03,753
But this year, there was
one tradition that was new.
567
00:20:03,754 --> 00:20:06,689
Move over. I want to shoot some ducks.
568
00:20:06,690 --> 00:20:09,392
But w-what about your football match?
569
00:20:10,022 --> 00:20:11,827
(Chuckles) Don't even try, all right?
570
00:20:11,828 --> 00:20:13,195
Yep.
571
00:20:13,196 --> 00:20:15,931
My dad and I played video games together,
572
00:20:15,932 --> 00:20:17,199
and it was glorious. (Dog chortling)
573
00:20:17,200 --> 00:20:18,968
Why is the dog laughing at me?
574
00:20:18,969 --> 00:20:20,436
Because you're terrible.
575
00:20:20,437 --> 00:20:22,104
(Laughs) I don't know what I'm doing.
576
00:20:22,105 --> 00:20:23,939
Here, you show me.
577
00:20:23,940 --> 00:20:25,107
You hold it like this.
578
00:20:25,108 --> 00:20:26,909
♪
579
00:20:26,910 --> 00:20:28,577
Tell me my life, okay? Tell me my life.
580
00:20:28,578 --> 00:20:31,113
I watched you... as dictated
by Barry and Beverly Goldberg.
581
00:20:31,114 --> 00:20:32,781
Don't ruin my dinner. Come on, now.
582
00:20:32,782 --> 00:20:34,350
You're ruining my dinner, okay?
583
00:20:34,351 --> 00:20:35,684
Be... be my guest.
584
00:20:35,685 --> 00:20:36,685
- Goodbye.
- Goodbye.
585
00:20:36,686 --> 00:20:38,687
- Oh, come on, now, Murray.
- Yeah!
586
00:20:38,688 --> 00:20:41,104
You're yelling at me.
I don't need this crap.
587
00:20:43,934 --> 00:20:45,234
(Door closes) Oh, hey.
588
00:20:45,235 --> 00:20:47,237
Can you give me a hand
in making some posters?
589
00:20:47,238 --> 00:20:48,940
I'm trying to advertise my new business.
590
00:20:48,941 --> 00:20:50,340
What could you ever offer the world
591
00:20:50,341 --> 00:20:51,408
that anyone would pay for?
592
00:20:51,409 --> 00:20:53,110
We own a mower. I got a beeper.
593
00:20:53,111 --> 00:20:54,511
Someone beeps me,
594
00:20:54,512 --> 00:20:56,713
I rush over and tend
to all their landscaping needs.
595
00:20:56,714 --> 00:20:59,549
That's... actually not a bad idea.
596
00:20:59,550 --> 00:21:00,917
I know, right?
597
00:21:00,918 --> 00:21:03,221
I've been posting signs
all over the neighborhood.
598
00:21:03,760 --> 00:21:07,196
"Barry, The Grass King...
For all your grass needs.
599
00:21:07,197 --> 00:21:09,697
- Pick me.
- Genius, right?
600
00:21:09,698 --> 00:21:11,698
Oop! I got one!
601
00:21:11,699 --> 00:21:13,338
And another!
602
00:21:13,339 --> 00:21:15,283
- Oh! And another!
- Idiot!
603
00:21:15,284 --> 00:21:18,495
You're the guy with the beeper who calls
himself The Grass King.
604
00:21:18,496 --> 00:21:21,174
- Don't you get it?
- Yah. I'm gonna be rich.
605
00:21:26,307 --> 00:21:28,526
sync and correction by solfieri
www.addic7ed.com
45014
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