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♪ Terrible Tudors,
gorgeous Georgians
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00:00:03,040 --> 00:00:04,160
♪ Slimy Stuarts, vile Victorians
3
00:00:04,160 --> 00:00:05,360
♪ Woeful wars, ferocious fights
4
00:00:05,360 --> 00:00:06,760
♪ Dingy castles, daring knights
5
00:00:06,760 --> 00:00:08,120
♪ Horrors that defy description
6
00:00:08,120 --> 00:00:09,520
♪ Cut-throat Celts, awful Egyptians
7
00:00:09,520 --> 00:00:10,800
♪ Vicious Vikings, cruel crimes
8
00:00:10,800 --> 00:00:12,240
♪ Punishment from ancient times
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00:00:12,240 --> 00:00:13,600
♪ Romans, rotten, rank and ruthless
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00:00:13,600 --> 00:00:14,960
♪ Cavemen, savage, fearsome,
toothless
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00:00:14,960 --> 00:00:16,360
♪ Groovy Greeks, brainy sages
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00:00:16,360 --> 00:00:17,760
♪ Mean and measly Middle Ages
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00:00:17,760 --> 00:00:20,080
♪ Gory stories, we do that
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00:00:20,080 --> 00:00:22,920
♪ And your host, a talking rat
15
00:00:22,920 --> 00:00:25,920
♪ The past is no longer a mystery
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00:00:25,920 --> 00:00:32,120
♪ Welcome to Horrible Histories. ♪
17
00:00:32,120 --> 00:00:34,880
Horrible Histories presents...
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00:00:37,760 --> 00:00:41,600
Welcome to our first-ever show
that's all about firsts.
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Today we're celebrating people
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00:00:43,240 --> 00:00:46,400
who were the very first in history
to do something remarkable.
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And in honour of today's theme,
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I'm going to become
the first-ever rat
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00:00:50,040 --> 00:00:52,320
to introduce Horrible Histories
on ice!
24
00:00:52,320 --> 00:00:54,120
Here we go. Step, step...
25
00:00:54,120 --> 00:00:56,960
Aaagh!
SPLASH!
26
00:00:56,960 --> 00:00:59,560
This is nothing like ice!
27
00:00:59,560 --> 00:01:02,640
Stupid guys who come up with
these ideas...
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HE SPLUTTERS
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00:01:04,480 --> 00:01:07,920
OK, we might need to try
the whole ice thing again
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00:01:07,920 --> 00:01:09,960
when it's a bit icier.
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00:01:09,960 --> 00:01:12,680
Don't worry, though, I'll come up
with something else
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whilst you meet our first hero,
Tutankhamun.
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Now, he was a teenage Egyptian
pharaoh who became really famous
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when his tomb was the first
to be discovered fully intact,
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which is why we all know about
all of his glitzy tomb treasure.
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♪humblebrag.
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HE SPLUTTERS
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♪ Tutankhamun
Ho!
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♪ Tutan, Tutan, Tutankhamun
Ho!
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♪ Tutan, Tutan, Tutankhamun
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♪ Yo, here's the thing,
check out my bling
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♪ It's all tat-for-Tut
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♪ Got more illicit gifts
than Jabba the Hutt
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♪ Like this thing on my skin?
So thin and leopard-y
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♪ Leopard wasn't real
so I was never in jeopardy
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00:01:47,840 --> 00:01:50,320
♪ Your normal loincloth comes with
maybe 50 stitches
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00:01:50,320 --> 00:01:53,080
♪ Look at mine,
200 in the house with my breeches
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♪ I'm the head of the gang,
Macho Man, Mr Boss
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♪ Though I'm partial to a weave,
eyeliner and lip-gloss
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00:01:57,920 --> 00:01:59,680
♪ Take one look at my togs
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♪ Everybody
loves my collection of gloves
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00:02:02,720 --> 00:02:07,640
♪ Have a good look down there
I'm a king of stylish underwear
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00:02:07,640 --> 00:02:10,000
♪ Listen to the people diss you
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♪ Everyone sing
"You can't take it with you"
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♪ But I say don't be gloomy
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♪ Look and see how my tomb is so
roomy
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♪ Tutan, Tutan, Tutankhamun
Ho!
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♪ Tutan, Tutan, Tutankhamun
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♪ So many things to show you as you
come into my portal
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♪ No idea how long before I wake
cos I'm immortal
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♪ Got a jackal-headed god with
the funny pointed ears
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♪ These jars are for my organs
Lungs and stomach go in here
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♪ This little board of Senet
Sure, I'll get some games in
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♪ With no-one else to play against
I'm always gonna win
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♪ Got this monogrammed fan
to help me keep a cool head
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♪ Cos you never know how hot you're
going to get when you are dead
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00:02:43,520 --> 00:02:47,880
♪ I'm gonna pop my clogs
surrounded by gold and jewel dogs
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♪ Take away your breath
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♪ Oh, not literally, please
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♪ I'm scared of death
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♪ Hope is a mortal thing, it's true
Otherwise, all this bling
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♪ Is fine for surviving captive
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♪ But personally, I'd rather live. ♪
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Uhh!
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DEEP VOICE-OVER: From ancient Egypt
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00:03:09,960 --> 00:03:13,080
comes a new fragrance
delivery system.
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SHE WHISPERS:
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Hello?
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Is there someone there?
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WHISPERS: Fat-Head.
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What is that alluring smell?
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Who are you? Fat-Head.
That's an unfortunate name.
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Wow, you smell amazing.
What is that on your head?
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VOICEOVER: Fat-Head sits
in a cone on your head
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and melts during the day,
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spreading the fatty aroma
across your skin.
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WHISPERS: It's animal fat dripping
down my face, mixed with herbs.
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00:03:46,840 --> 00:03:48,360
Sh.
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00:03:48,360 --> 00:03:51,080
You had me at animal fat.
Fat-Head.
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It's fat on your head.
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Fat-Head. Bit harsh.
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00:04:01,360 --> 00:04:03,760
Easy, easy, there we go.
93
00:04:03,760 --> 00:04:06,440
OK, forget the ice skates.
94
00:04:06,440 --> 00:04:10,440
I'm going to be the first rat to
present Horrible Histories on...
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00:04:10,440 --> 00:04:11,880
..roller-skates. Here we go.
96
00:04:11,880 --> 00:04:13,720
Aaagh!
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Not too easy, not too easy,
not too easy, not too easy!
98
00:04:17,000 --> 00:04:20,080
How do I turn around? Whoa!
99
00:04:20,080 --> 00:04:24,200
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
100
00:04:24,200 --> 00:04:26,080
CRASH!
101
00:04:26,080 --> 00:04:29,280
Do you know what? I'm going
to have to think of something else.
102
00:04:29,280 --> 00:04:31,480
Of course, these days I could
just go online
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00:04:31,480 --> 00:04:34,000
to look for something
new and exciting to do.
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00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:36,080
You couldn't do that
in ancient times, though.
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00:04:36,080 --> 00:04:38,200
Although, if you
were in ancient Egypt,
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00:04:38,200 --> 00:04:42,240
you could search through virtually
all the knowledge in the known world
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00:04:42,240 --> 00:04:44,440
by visiting the first-ever library.
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00:04:44,440 --> 00:04:48,160
Of course, it wasn't quite as
easy to use as the internet. Whoa!
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00:04:49,640 --> 00:04:52,200
Yeah, you can ask it anything
you want, really,
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00:04:52,200 --> 00:04:54,800
like why is the sky blue?
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00:04:54,800 --> 00:04:57,360
Or why does it get colder
when you go up a mountain
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00:04:57,360 --> 00:05:00,200
but you're closer to the sun?
Oh, right. What's it called?
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00:05:00,200 --> 00:05:01,800
The Library of Alexandria.
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00:05:01,800 --> 00:05:05,120
It contains all the knowledge in the
world. What are you going to ask?
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00:05:05,120 --> 00:05:07,640
I'm going to see if they've got
any funny cat pictures.
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00:05:07,640 --> 00:05:08,800
Oh, that's a good one, yeah.
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00:05:08,800 --> 00:05:14,320
Hello, everyone, and welcome to the
world-famous Library of Alexandria,
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00:05:14,320 --> 00:05:18,200
the greatest collection of knowledge
in history!
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00:05:18,200 --> 00:05:21,280
Sadly, we're not open to the public,
so we can't take any questions.
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00:05:21,280 --> 00:05:23,080
THEY GRUMBLE
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00:05:23,080 --> 00:05:27,640
Oh, all right, just this once, but
just one each, OK? You first, go.
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00:05:27,640 --> 00:05:30,280
Can parrots fart? Really?
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00:05:30,280 --> 00:05:34,360
The sum of all the world's knowledge
at your fingertips, and you want...
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00:05:34,360 --> 00:05:37,960
Yeah, yeah. No, birds can't fart.
Next.
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00:05:37,960 --> 00:05:40,840
WOMAN: Hello? Yeah, I'm over here.
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00:05:40,840 --> 00:05:43,560
Over here. OK, yeah, that's close
enough.
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00:05:43,560 --> 00:05:45,000
What's your question?
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00:05:45,000 --> 00:05:49,680
Er, do you have any life hacks
for getting a pot off your head?
129
00:05:49,680 --> 00:05:51,600
Asking for a friend.
130
00:05:51,600 --> 00:05:57,160
I don't have any... Let me ask my
assistant. Alexa. Alexa.
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00:05:57,160 --> 00:06:01,240
Sorry, forgot to do the voice.
Oh. BREATHY: Alexa. Hello.
132
00:06:01,240 --> 00:06:04,600
Do you have any life hacks
for removing a pot from your head?
133
00:06:04,600 --> 00:06:08,720
Removing a pot from your head -
lubricate the pot and gently pull.
134
00:06:08,720 --> 00:06:11,760
Thank you.
I'll pass that to my friend.
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00:06:11,760 --> 00:06:12,800
LOUD SMASH
136
00:06:12,800 --> 00:06:15,920
Oh! And this is why
we don't open to the public.
137
00:06:15,920 --> 00:06:18,720
Yes, what's your question?
138
00:06:18,720 --> 00:06:21,720
How did they figure out
there are 365 days in a year?
139
00:06:21,720 --> 00:06:23,880
Oh, that's a great question.
140
00:06:23,880 --> 00:06:28,120
So, the Babylonian calendar
only had 360 days in it,
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00:06:28,120 --> 00:06:32,960
but we Egyptians added five days
after identifying annual patterns
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00:06:32,960 --> 00:06:36,600
in the flooding of the River Nile
and the rising of the star Sirius.
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00:06:36,600 --> 00:06:38,520
Oh, amazing!
144
00:06:38,520 --> 00:06:42,240
Can't believe I've never Library
of Alexandria-ed something before!
145
00:06:42,240 --> 00:06:44,640
Is there anything else
you'd like to know?
146
00:06:44,640 --> 00:06:47,400
I mean, all human knowledge
is at your disposal.
147
00:06:47,400 --> 00:06:49,320
Do you have any funny cat pictures?
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00:06:52,600 --> 00:06:53,960
That's it, I'm done.
149
00:06:53,960 --> 00:06:56,840
Don't worry, he's left his
assistant. Alexa.
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00:06:56,840 --> 00:07:01,760
Hello. Do you have any funny cat
pictures? Sunny chat pictures.
151
00:07:01,760 --> 00:07:07,160
No, funny cat pictures.
Furry hat witches. No, funny... OK.
152
00:07:07,160 --> 00:07:08,440
I see why he left her outside.
153
00:07:08,440 --> 00:07:10,360
I'm sorry,
I did not understand your question.
154
00:07:10,360 --> 00:07:13,240
I can see why he left you... I did
understand the question, OK? Sorry.
155
00:07:13,240 --> 00:07:16,080
Don't push it. It was her.
156
00:07:16,080 --> 00:07:20,200
While we may have created
the first-ever library,
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00:07:20,200 --> 00:07:23,040
we Greeks created something a lot
more fun -
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00:07:23,040 --> 00:07:26,520
the biggest and bestest
sporting competition ever,
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00:07:26,520 --> 00:07:31,000
the first Olympic Games. Although,
strangely, in the very early days,
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00:07:31,000 --> 00:07:33,600
it didn't have anything to do
with sport.
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00:07:33,600 --> 00:07:34,920
Guys, I think it's pretty clear
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00:07:34,920 --> 00:07:36,920
that our religious
festival celebrating Zeus
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00:07:36,920 --> 00:07:38,240
is getting a little bit stale.
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00:07:38,240 --> 00:07:41,960
NARRATOR: In an attempt to inspire
some much-needed enthusiasm,
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the Zeus festival committee has
invited Sophie and Sebastian
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00:07:45,680 --> 00:07:48,560
to an ideas meeting to come up
with some new events.
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00:07:48,560 --> 00:07:50,400
I hope you guys are hungry,
168
00:07:50,400 --> 00:07:52,920
because we have cooked up a bowl
of idea soup
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00:07:52,920 --> 00:07:56,800
that you are going to be picking out
of that little beard for days.
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00:07:56,800 --> 00:08:00,840
OK, so we've got running, boxing,
wrestling...
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00:08:00,840 --> 00:08:03,000
Hang on, it's not a sporting event.
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00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:05,200
We're looking to liven up
a religious festival.
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00:08:05,200 --> 00:08:09,720
It's held at one of Greece's most
holy sites, Mount Olympus.
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00:08:09,720 --> 00:08:11,160
OK, so...
175
00:08:11,160 --> 00:08:14,240
It's possible we might have
got our presentations mixed up.
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00:08:14,240 --> 00:08:17,040
Yeah, that so explains why our
human sacrifice ideas
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00:08:17,040 --> 00:08:19,760
didn't go down well in front
of the International Cricket Board.
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00:08:19,760 --> 00:08:22,600
Do you know what?
Why don't we combine them both
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00:08:22,600 --> 00:08:25,440
so we've got a sporting event that
celebrates a religious festival,
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00:08:25,440 --> 00:08:28,360
all in the sanctuary
on Mount Olympus?
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00:08:28,360 --> 00:08:32,600
And we'll call it the Olympusics!
Yes! Can I get a Peloponnesian wave?
182
00:08:32,600 --> 00:08:34,280
Yes, you can!
183
00:08:35,560 --> 00:08:39,040
You know, we could get some slaves
to build a stadium,
184
00:08:39,040 --> 00:08:40,280
and until then...
185
00:08:40,280 --> 00:08:44,200
We could hold the events in the
olive groves around the mountain
186
00:08:44,200 --> 00:08:47,480
and we could give the winners
bits of the trees as prizes.
187
00:08:47,480 --> 00:08:51,120
We were thinking of, like, medals,
but whatever. No? Toss them.
188
00:08:51,120 --> 00:08:53,720
They're gone. The only thing
I'm wondering is
189
00:08:53,720 --> 00:08:56,720
why boxing and running honours
the gods.
190
00:08:56,720 --> 00:08:59,360
OK, it's the heroes that
the sports event creates
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00:08:59,360 --> 00:09:02,120
which will honour Dr Zeus. Big up.
192
00:09:02,120 --> 00:09:06,160
It's just Zeus, actually.
Horton hears a what?
193
00:09:06,160 --> 00:09:09,280
Yeah, I think you might thinking
of a different Seuss.
194
00:09:09,280 --> 00:09:11,640
Ding-ding! Round 1, boxing.
195
00:09:11,640 --> 00:09:16,440
Let's take our biggest fighter
and pitch them against our smallest.
196
00:09:16,440 --> 00:09:18,960
So brutal. I love it already.
197
00:09:18,960 --> 00:09:20,600
Loving you. It sounds awesome.
198
00:09:20,600 --> 00:09:22,040
Can't wait to see it.
199
00:09:22,040 --> 00:09:24,360
Oh. Awks.
200
00:09:24,360 --> 00:09:27,120
Yeah, you're not going.
Women are banned.
201
00:09:27,120 --> 00:09:29,720
Right. Well, we'd never agree to
that.
202
00:09:29,720 --> 00:09:32,520
Quick vote? Yeah, yeah. 3-0!
203
00:09:32,520 --> 00:09:35,120
Premium exclusivity.
204
00:09:35,120 --> 00:09:37,720
The Olympusics are born!
205
00:09:39,200 --> 00:09:43,400
Might have to work on the name
a little bit. Unbelievable.
206
00:09:43,400 --> 00:09:47,720
Good day. I am George Washington,
first president of the USA.
207
00:09:47,720 --> 00:09:51,720
Today, Americans celebrate
the nation's birthday on July 4th.
208
00:09:51,720 --> 00:09:54,480
But what was
strange about my birthday?
209
00:09:54,480 --> 00:09:55,800
Was it...?
210
00:10:05,520 --> 00:10:07,240
And the answer is C.
211
00:10:09,520 --> 00:10:13,840
In 1752, the British adopted
a new calendar system,
212
00:10:13,840 --> 00:10:16,640
added 11 extra days and
changed the start of the year
213
00:10:16,640 --> 00:10:19,080
from the 25th of March
to the 1st of January.
214
00:10:19,080 --> 00:10:23,040
So my birthday changed
from February 11th, 1731
215
00:10:23,040 --> 00:10:26,400
to February 22nd, 1732.
216
00:10:27,720 --> 00:10:30,920
Basically,
I got a whole year younger.
217
00:10:30,920 --> 00:10:33,720
Can't you tell? No?
218
00:10:35,040 --> 00:10:38,440
OK, time for my first-ever Horrible
Histories link
219
00:10:38,440 --> 00:10:41,400
whilst hanging upside down.
220
00:10:41,400 --> 00:10:43,000
George Washington may have been
221
00:10:43,000 --> 00:10:45,080
the first president
of the United States, but...
222
00:10:45,080 --> 00:10:48,480
Whoa! Guys, the rope's stretching!
223
00:10:48,480 --> 00:10:51,960
It's OK, bungee ropes are supposed
to. Oh, OK. OK.
224
00:10:51,960 --> 00:10:54,560
Washington was the first president,
225
00:10:54,560 --> 00:10:58,280
but the first person to discover
America had been much, much earlier.
226
00:10:58,280 --> 00:11:01,040
Wait, what do you mean, bungee rope?
227
00:11:02,080 --> 00:11:03,160
Aaagh!
228
00:11:03,160 --> 00:11:04,480
PARP!
229
00:11:04,480 --> 00:11:06,160
Whoa!
230
00:11:07,080 --> 00:11:09,400
Thanks for that, guys.
231
00:11:10,400 --> 00:11:13,240
HOLLYWOOD VOICE-OVER:
This is the story
232
00:11:13,240 --> 00:11:16,800
of the first person
to discover America.
233
00:11:21,320 --> 00:11:23,280
While sailing for Asia,
234
00:11:23,280 --> 00:11:24,840
one man believes
235
00:11:24,840 --> 00:11:28,960
he is the first to discover America.
236
00:11:28,960 --> 00:11:35,720
I, the great and handsome Italian
explorer, Christopher Columbus,
237
00:11:35,720 --> 00:11:40,560
am the first man ever to set a foot
in this strange new land.
238
00:11:40,560 --> 00:11:43,480
RECORD SCRATCH
Only he wasn't the first.
239
00:11:49,920 --> 00:11:51,840
Our long journey from Asia is over.
240
00:11:51,840 --> 00:11:56,240
We shall build a new home
in this land.
241
00:11:56,240 --> 00:11:58,320
OK.
242
00:11:58,320 --> 00:12:00,520
I, Christopher Columbus,
243
00:12:00,520 --> 00:12:05,040
am the first European man
to set foot in America.
244
00:12:05,040 --> 00:12:07,480
Er, technically,
that's not true either.
245
00:12:09,840 --> 00:12:11,120
A new land!
246
00:12:12,360 --> 00:12:15,800
The sagas will tell of my journey
forever
247
00:12:15,800 --> 00:12:17,560
and I, Leif Erikson,
248
00:12:17,560 --> 00:12:20,360
son of Erik the Red,
249
00:12:20,360 --> 00:12:23,680
will name this land... Vinland.
250
00:12:23,680 --> 00:12:25,920
Oh, look, a skraeling!
251
00:12:25,920 --> 00:12:26,960
Hey, how's it going?
252
00:12:26,960 --> 00:12:30,000
You're going to love what
we've done to this place.
253
00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:32,720
I really need a wee. Just there.
254
00:12:34,160 --> 00:12:37,080
Really? I mean, can they prove it?
255
00:12:37,080 --> 00:12:38,480
OK, fine, fine.
256
00:12:40,400 --> 00:12:44,560
I, Christopher Columbus,
am the first European man,
257
00:12:44,560 --> 00:12:48,880
apart from a bunch of other guys,
ever to set foot in...
258
00:12:48,880 --> 00:12:52,880
Oh, who am I kidding? I didn't even
make it all the way to America!
259
00:12:52,880 --> 00:12:55,320
I stopped in the Caribbean
by mistake.
260
00:12:56,600 --> 00:12:58,040
Oh, forget it!
261
00:12:58,040 --> 00:12:59,560
Let's go home. Turn the boat around!
262
00:12:59,560 --> 00:13:03,240
America, discovered by Columbus...
263
00:13:05,480 --> 00:13:09,400
Yo, John Cabot here. Check me out!
264
00:13:11,640 --> 00:13:14,160
Shout-out to King Henry VII,
brrap, brrap!
265
00:13:14,160 --> 00:13:15,360
He sponsored my trip,
266
00:13:15,360 --> 00:13:18,240
basically because he felt
like a total bonehead
267
00:13:18,240 --> 00:13:19,680
for not backing Columbus.
268
00:13:19,680 --> 00:13:23,840
And his trust in Jocab - still going
with that name - has paid off.
269
00:13:23,840 --> 00:13:27,000
We found something way
more impressive. Land ahoy!
270
00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:29,360
No - massive fish.
271
00:13:32,400 --> 00:13:34,640
Check this out,
it's going to be hilarious.
272
00:13:34,640 --> 00:13:36,440
Wow, this is a whole new continent.
273
00:13:36,440 --> 00:13:38,560
Kiss the fish!
274
00:13:38,560 --> 00:13:39,840
Kiss it! Mwah!
275
00:13:39,840 --> 00:13:41,720
John. John, stop messing around,
276
00:13:41,720 --> 00:13:43,720
I think this could be
really significant.
277
00:13:43,720 --> 00:13:44,760
Sorry.
278
00:13:44,760 --> 00:13:46,440
But kiss the fish!
279
00:13:49,520 --> 00:13:50,680
So I think we can all agree
280
00:13:50,680 --> 00:13:55,120
that Fish Land is way better
than anything Columbus ever found.
281
00:13:55,120 --> 00:13:56,440
We're not calling it Fish Land.
282
00:13:56,440 --> 00:13:59,200
Oh, you think you COD do better?
283
00:13:59,200 --> 00:14:01,720
Do you not like this PLAICE?
284
00:14:01,720 --> 00:14:04,160
John, we are not calling it
Fish Land!
285
00:14:04,160 --> 00:14:05,920
Jocab's Fish Land!
286
00:14:09,600 --> 00:14:13,360
Our fair Queen Elizabeth I
had her own firsts.
287
00:14:13,360 --> 00:14:15,120
She was the first monarch to open up
288
00:14:15,120 --> 00:14:19,000
the Tower of London's menagerie of
exotic animals to the paying public.
289
00:14:19,000 --> 00:14:23,560
But being the head keeper there
was not the easiest job.
290
00:14:28,880 --> 00:14:30,600
LOUD MOAN
291
00:14:30,600 --> 00:14:32,440
Is there anyone else,
Sir Nicholas?
292
00:14:32,440 --> 00:14:35,200
Just one,
Your Majesty, Sir John Peyton.
293
00:14:35,200 --> 00:14:36,360
GROWLING
294
00:14:36,360 --> 00:14:37,400
Sit! Nice lion!
295
00:14:37,400 --> 00:14:38,840
GROWLING
296
00:14:38,840 --> 00:14:40,480
I said, sit!
297
00:14:41,440 --> 00:14:44,800
An unusual entrance, Sir Nicholas.
298
00:14:44,800 --> 00:14:49,760
Sir John looks after the animals
in your menagerie, Your Majesty.
299
00:14:49,760 --> 00:14:51,400
Yes, I do, Your Majesty.
300
00:14:51,400 --> 00:14:53,080
I was wondering if... Ooh!
301
00:14:54,640 --> 00:14:57,560
I told you not to make a fool of me
in front of the Queen!
302
00:14:58,560 --> 00:15:00,040
HE LAUGHS
303
00:15:00,040 --> 00:15:01,440
Apologies, Your Majesty.
304
00:15:01,440 --> 00:15:03,640
I was wondering if we could discuss
305
00:15:03,640 --> 00:15:07,200
the moving of your wild animals
from the Tower.
306
00:15:07,200 --> 00:15:11,440
Certainly not. Many of those beasts
are gifts from kings and queens.
307
00:15:11,440 --> 00:15:15,240
They are a symbol of my power.
It is not simply a zoo.
308
00:15:15,240 --> 00:15:18,080
I understand. It's just,
the problem is... Woo!
309
00:15:19,160 --> 00:15:21,880
Stop licking me, Elizabeth!
310
00:15:21,880 --> 00:15:24,040
You're tickling! Naughty girl.
311
00:15:24,040 --> 00:15:27,480
Your Majesty... Yeah, sorry.
312
00:15:27,480 --> 00:15:29,560
Elizabeth can be a little bit
slobbery.
313
00:15:29,560 --> 00:15:32,320
Hand the rope to our guard
so we may finish our conversation.
314
00:15:32,320 --> 00:15:35,000
Yeah. There you go.
315
00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:36,480
GROWLING CONTINUES
316
00:15:36,480 --> 00:15:41,080
Well, if she's named after me, I'm
sure she's a very nice lion. Woo!
317
00:15:41,080 --> 00:15:42,880
ROARING
318
00:15:44,000 --> 00:15:47,360
Yes. Your Majesty, your royal
menagerie has outgrown the Tower.
319
00:15:47,360 --> 00:15:48,640
Naughty, naughty lion!
320
00:15:48,640 --> 00:15:52,160
The castle wasn't built
to house wild animals, you see.
321
00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:55,560
At present, we have, well, wolves,
jackals...
322
00:15:55,560 --> 00:15:58,600
ANIMALS HOWL AND GROWL
..hyenas, bears, of course,
323
00:15:58,600 --> 00:16:01,000
leopards. We used to have
some nice dogs
324
00:16:01,000 --> 00:16:03,760
but, well, leopards.
325
00:16:03,760 --> 00:16:06,280
And I think that's all.
326
00:16:06,280 --> 00:16:07,320
LOUD GROWL
327
00:16:07,320 --> 00:16:08,840
Six lions.
328
00:16:08,840 --> 00:16:10,240
GUARD SHRIEKS
329
00:16:10,240 --> 00:16:11,640
She'll get bored eventually!
330
00:16:11,640 --> 00:16:14,040
Sir Peyton, there has been
a menagerie at the Tower
331
00:16:14,040 --> 00:16:15,240
since the reign of King John.
332
00:16:15,240 --> 00:16:17,480
I will not be the first monarch
in 400 years
333
00:16:17,480 --> 00:16:19,640
not to have a menagerie here.
334
00:16:19,640 --> 00:16:22,080
If you need help,
the guard will give you a hand.
335
00:16:22,080 --> 00:16:23,920
ROARING
336
00:16:23,920 --> 00:16:25,360
Oh! See?
337
00:16:25,360 --> 00:16:27,040
He's helping you already.
338
00:16:30,640 --> 00:16:32,560
Historical firsts often arise
339
00:16:32,560 --> 00:16:37,200
from people going against popular
thinking and doing the unexpected.
340
00:16:37,200 --> 00:16:41,960
Like no-one expects a rat to vanish
before their very eyes, like this.
341
00:16:43,560 --> 00:16:45,080
HE COUGHS
342
00:16:45,080 --> 00:16:49,440
Yeah, that's where the trapdoor
should have opened. Sorry!
343
00:16:49,440 --> 00:16:51,800
It seems other unconventional
thinkers
344
00:16:51,800 --> 00:16:53,640
have had better luck than me,
345
00:16:53,640 --> 00:16:55,400
like the three famous scientists
346
00:16:55,400 --> 00:16:58,440
Copernicus, Galileo
and Isaac Newton.
347
00:16:58,440 --> 00:17:00,640
Yeah. They all went
against popular belief
348
00:17:00,640 --> 00:17:03,640
when they came up with some
of the very first correct theories
349
00:17:03,640 --> 00:17:06,920
about the movements of the Earth,
our universe and gravity.
350
00:17:06,920 --> 00:17:08,240
TRAPDOOR OPENS
351
00:17:08,240 --> 00:17:12,480
Aaagh! It's too late now,
mate! Sorry!
352
00:17:12,480 --> 00:17:14,600
SPLASH!
353
00:17:21,920 --> 00:17:25,600
♪ The Earth spins round the sun,
right round
354
00:17:25,600 --> 00:17:29,240
♪ Not the other way round,
way round, round
355
00:17:29,240 --> 00:17:31,440
♪ I'm Copernicus
I'm the first one of us
356
00:17:31,440 --> 00:17:33,240
♪ To say the Earth spins on an axis
357
00:17:33,240 --> 00:17:35,560
♪ Now convincing the world that
their view's absurd
358
00:17:35,560 --> 00:17:37,000
♪ Is much more harder in practice
359
00:17:37,000 --> 00:17:39,240
♪ That our planet spins this way
and also spins that way
360
00:17:39,240 --> 00:17:40,760
♪ My critics, they call me eccentric
361
00:17:40,760 --> 00:17:43,280
♪ But haters be hating
while I'll be creating
362
00:17:43,280 --> 00:17:45,000
♪ My model that's heliocentric
363
00:17:45,000 --> 00:17:48,640
♪ The Earth spins round the sun,
right round
364
00:17:48,640 --> 00:17:52,240
♪ Not the other way round,
way round, round
365
00:17:52,240 --> 00:17:56,360
♪ Not in a circle Kepler found
366
00:17:56,360 --> 00:18:00,320
♪ Goes elliptically round,
round, round, round
367
00:18:00,320 --> 00:18:04,080
♪ Discovering Jupiter's four moons
refuted the formerly mooted Ptolemy
368
00:18:04,080 --> 00:18:05,680
♪ Through my telescope,
the Pope said
369
00:18:05,680 --> 00:18:07,880
♪ "Nope,
what is this wild new astronomy?"
370
00:18:07,880 --> 00:18:09,880
♪ Tried to make me recant
I said that I shan't
371
00:18:09,880 --> 00:18:11,560
♪ Because there was proof I attested
372
00:18:11,560 --> 00:18:13,960
♪ Cos that was my view
but what could I do?
373
00:18:13,960 --> 00:18:15,680
♪ It actually got me arrested
374
00:18:15,680 --> 00:18:19,400
♪ The Earth spins round the sun,
right round
375
00:18:19,400 --> 00:18:23,320
♪ Not the other way round,
way round, round
376
00:18:23,320 --> 00:18:27,480
♪ Not in a circle Kepler found
377
00:18:27,480 --> 00:18:30,760
♪ Goes elliptically round,
round, round, round
378
00:18:30,760 --> 00:18:32,800
♪ Don't panic,
our world is mechanical
379
00:18:32,800 --> 00:18:34,520
♪ My laws of motion all
work without flaws
380
00:18:34,520 --> 00:18:36,520
♪ I made science seem much less
trickier
381
00:18:36,520 --> 00:18:38,640
♪ In my Principia with show of force
382
00:18:38,640 --> 00:18:40,120
♪ Can't help that it's matter of
fact
383
00:18:40,120 --> 00:18:42,560
♪ That all matter attracts
Let's break it down rationally
384
00:18:42,560 --> 00:18:44,680
♪ That the sun pulls the Earth,
pulls the moon, pulls the sea
385
00:18:44,680 --> 00:18:46,440
♪ Even me
Yeah, that's gravity
386
00:18:46,440 --> 00:18:50,080
♪ The Earth spins round the sun,
right round
387
00:18:50,080 --> 00:18:53,560
♪ Not the other way round,
way round, round
388
00:18:53,560 --> 00:18:55,440
♪ Earth spins round the sun, around
389
00:18:55,440 --> 00:18:57,240
♪ Not the other way round, around
390
00:18:57,240 --> 00:18:59,160
♪ Gravity keeps us on the ground
391
00:18:59,160 --> 00:19:01,600
♪ Means the sun pulls the Earth
around. ♪
392
00:19:04,080 --> 00:19:06,360
For a new fashion to become popular,
393
00:19:06,360 --> 00:19:09,200
someone has to be the first to try
out a new style,
394
00:19:09,200 --> 00:19:12,080
and throughout history,
radical fashion changes
395
00:19:12,080 --> 00:19:13,840
have always divided opinion.
396
00:19:15,080 --> 00:19:17,240
Oh, my garters,
397
00:19:17,240 --> 00:19:20,520
tonight is going to be large.
398
00:19:20,520 --> 00:19:23,520
Does I espy the absolute
lord of banter?
399
00:19:25,320 --> 00:19:27,600
Just to be clear, though,
I am the Lord of Shropshire.
400
00:19:27,600 --> 00:19:29,000
I know. Just to be clear. Jokes.
401
00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:32,360
Yeah. Hey, mate, what happened,
did your wig shrink in the wash?
402
00:19:32,360 --> 00:19:34,760
No, I'm only half-dressed.
403
00:19:34,760 --> 00:19:37,560
Giles! Yes, coming.
404
00:19:37,560 --> 00:19:38,600
HE MUTTERS
405
00:19:41,280 --> 00:19:44,320
Living the dream.
406
00:19:44,320 --> 00:19:46,560
OK. You're welcome.
407
00:19:46,560 --> 00:19:49,840
Mate, that barnet is on fleek.
408
00:19:49,840 --> 00:19:51,440
No, it's on my head.
409
00:19:51,440 --> 00:19:53,280
HE CACKLES
410
00:19:54,480 --> 00:19:55,720
Oh, mate, look.
411
00:19:55,720 --> 00:19:58,880
Buckle bros!
412
00:19:58,880 --> 00:20:00,200
Whoa!
413
00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:01,800
Don't scuff my butts.
414
00:20:01,800 --> 00:20:03,080
Buttons.
415
00:20:03,080 --> 00:20:06,080
Oh, yeah. Good point,
man got to keep them fresh.
416
00:20:06,080 --> 00:20:08,040
Um, ask me the time.
417
00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:10,480
What's the time? Don't know,
never learnt to tell it!
418
00:20:10,480 --> 00:20:14,040
But check my new buttons. Why?
419
00:20:14,040 --> 00:20:15,320
Because they're clocks.
420
00:20:15,320 --> 00:20:17,920
That's why I said
about the time!
421
00:20:17,920 --> 00:20:19,320
They're going to slay.
422
00:20:19,320 --> 00:20:23,080
Oh, mate, need any cotton balls?
I'm just going to stuff my face.
423
00:20:26,960 --> 00:20:29,000
Mate, jealous of the puffy face.
424
00:20:29,000 --> 00:20:31,520
Where's Cuthbert?
425
00:20:31,520 --> 00:20:33,240
C-man be missing all the jokes.
426
00:20:33,240 --> 00:20:35,560
Ahem. Good day, gentlemen.
427
00:20:35,560 --> 00:20:38,360
Oh, my days.
428
00:20:38,360 --> 00:20:41,120
You can't go out like that,
your clothes are looking mank.
429
00:20:41,120 --> 00:20:45,680
OMG, are you a dandy now?
Quite right, Bartholomew.
430
00:20:45,680 --> 00:20:48,200
I was once a Macaroni like you,
and now I'm a dandy.
431
00:20:48,200 --> 00:20:51,160
Beau Brummell introduced me to
the style. It's quite the thing.
432
00:20:51,160 --> 00:20:54,640
Apologies for the late arrival,
I was bathing.
433
00:20:54,640 --> 00:20:58,200
But you had a bath yesterday.
I bathe every day now. Why?
434
00:20:58,200 --> 00:21:00,000
Seriously? Mm-hm.
435
00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:03,480
What's more, it took me four hours
to choose the perfect cravat
436
00:21:03,480 --> 00:21:08,520
and polish my shoes in champagne.
Whoa! They look sticky to me.
437
00:21:08,520 --> 00:21:10,560
Not to cast aspersions, gentlemen,
438
00:21:10,560 --> 00:21:15,320
but I was rather feeling ready for a
style that was a little less silly.
439
00:21:15,320 --> 00:21:20,360
Hold me back, bruv! Don't do it,
he's not worth it! Ow. Sorry.
440
00:21:20,360 --> 00:21:23,200
Your wig, sir.
Want me to secure it to the top
441
00:21:23,200 --> 00:21:25,840
or are you going to plonk it on
and hope for the best?
442
00:21:25,840 --> 00:21:29,440
Of course I don't want you to,
don't be so silly! Leave us!
443
00:21:30,560 --> 00:21:33,160
So saucy. Shall we, gentlemen?
444
00:21:36,560 --> 00:21:38,920
I just swallowed my cotton balls!
445
00:21:40,560 --> 00:21:43,440
Female firsts in history
didn't just have to contend
446
00:21:43,440 --> 00:21:45,920
with the normal difficulties
faced by pioneers.
447
00:21:45,920 --> 00:21:49,880
We women also had to overcome
the foolish and incorrect opinion
448
00:21:49,880 --> 00:21:52,240
that we couldn't achieve
great things.
449
00:21:52,240 --> 00:21:55,000
Thankfully, many brave
and inspiring women
450
00:21:55,000 --> 00:21:57,720
didn't let silly ideas like that
stop them.
451
00:22:01,920 --> 00:22:03,160
Ladies, put down your crochet
452
00:22:03,160 --> 00:22:05,920
or whatever domestic frivolity
you're currently engaged in
453
00:22:05,920 --> 00:22:08,000
and pay attention
to this important warning.
454
00:22:08,000 --> 00:22:09,800
Never try to cross the Atlantic
455
00:22:09,800 --> 00:22:11,440
in an aeroplane on your own.
456
00:22:11,440 --> 00:22:12,960
Your weak and frail bodies
457
00:22:12,960 --> 00:22:15,440
are not up to the task.
458
00:22:15,440 --> 00:22:17,680
Don't take my word for it,
ask this gentleman.
459
00:22:17,680 --> 00:22:19,240
I'm Amelia Earhart
460
00:22:19,240 --> 00:22:20,960
and I was the second person of
either sex
461
00:22:20,960 --> 00:22:22,800
to fly across the Atlantic solo.
462
00:22:22,800 --> 00:22:25,600
Help! He's a lady!
463
00:22:25,600 --> 00:22:27,440
I broke records,
flew dangerous missions
464
00:22:27,440 --> 00:22:30,600
and won the US
Distinguished Flying Cross.
465
00:22:30,600 --> 00:22:32,240
Good for you, aren't you clever?
466
00:22:33,960 --> 00:22:37,640
While clever ladies like
Ms Amelia Earhart may fly aeroplanes
467
00:22:37,640 --> 00:22:39,480
if their husbands allow them,
468
00:22:39,480 --> 00:22:42,400
it is unladylike to fly aeroplanes
during a war.
469
00:22:42,400 --> 00:22:45,400
The traumas will be too much
for your fragile minds to take.
470
00:22:45,400 --> 00:22:48,960
But don't take my word for it, ask
these brave gentlemen of the RAF.
471
00:22:50,400 --> 00:22:54,120
I'm Pauline Gower and I created
the women's section of the ATA,
472
00:22:54,120 --> 00:22:58,760
the Air Transport Auxiliary.
Heavens! All the men are all ladies!
473
00:22:58,760 --> 00:23:01,320
My moustache has
fallen off in shock!
474
00:23:01,320 --> 00:23:04,400
We were known as the Attagirls
and not only did we fly the planes,
475
00:23:04,400 --> 00:23:05,680
we also flew broken ones,
476
00:23:05,680 --> 00:23:07,200
which was much more dangerous.
477
00:23:07,200 --> 00:23:09,120
Does anyone have any smelling salts?
478
00:23:09,120 --> 00:23:10,400
I'm feeling a little...
479
00:23:12,440 --> 00:23:13,960
I'm Joy Lofthouse
480
00:23:13,960 --> 00:23:17,520
and we flew everything from
Spitfires to long-range bombers.
481
00:23:17,520 --> 00:23:20,120
All right. I-I'm all right.
482
00:23:20,120 --> 00:23:23,640
Even in the 1940s, we were paid
the same as men.
483
00:23:23,640 --> 00:23:25,000
The same as...
484
00:23:26,560 --> 00:23:28,960
It was the first time
the British Government
485
00:23:28,960 --> 00:23:31,040
agreed equal pay for equal work.
486
00:23:31,040 --> 00:23:34,520
Listen, ladies, this is ridiculous!
You just can't...
487
00:23:38,040 --> 00:23:40,960
Girlies... Aaagh! Women.
488
00:23:40,960 --> 00:23:45,160
Be warned. Idiots like me
will say you can't do things
489
00:23:45,160 --> 00:23:47,280
just because you're female.
490
00:23:47,280 --> 00:23:48,840
Don't listen.
491
00:23:50,600 --> 00:23:52,000
Very good.
492
00:23:52,000 --> 00:23:55,360
Which one of you clever girls
did the typing?
493
00:23:57,040 --> 00:23:58,800
Hello, I am Valentina Tereshkova,
494
00:23:58,800 --> 00:24:01,960
proud Russian and first lady
to go into space.
495
00:24:01,960 --> 00:24:06,360
But what happened during my
three-day orbit of Planet Earth?
496
00:24:08,080 --> 00:24:09,360
Did I...?
497
00:24:17,200 --> 00:24:19,120
And the answer is C.
498
00:24:19,120 --> 00:24:22,960
In space, many cosmonauts
feel sick from lack of gravity.
499
00:24:24,240 --> 00:24:26,000
I did much puking.
500
00:24:26,000 --> 00:24:29,600
And also leg hurt and couldn't
leave seat for three days.
501
00:24:29,600 --> 00:24:32,360
And nearly died when
orbit calculations wrong
502
00:24:32,360 --> 00:24:34,240
and nose smashed on helmet.
503
00:24:34,240 --> 00:24:37,720
And then nearly drowned when
parachute land near big lake.
504
00:24:37,720 --> 00:24:41,400
But apart from that, best fun ever!
Highly recommend.
505
00:24:41,400 --> 00:24:42,880
Two vertical thumbs.
506
00:24:43,800 --> 00:24:45,560
Well, exciting news.
507
00:24:45,560 --> 00:24:47,000
After that fall,
508
00:24:47,000 --> 00:24:51,200
I've become the first rat to host
a TV show in a full-body cast.
509
00:24:51,200 --> 00:24:52,480
Hurrah!
510
00:24:52,480 --> 00:24:54,000
BONE CRACKS
Oh!
511
00:24:54,000 --> 00:24:57,320
Being the first to do something
can obviously be very dangerous,
512
00:24:57,320 --> 00:25:00,560
and there's nothing more dangerous
than going into space.
513
00:25:00,560 --> 00:25:02,440
Especially in those early days
514
00:25:02,440 --> 00:25:04,400
when America and Soviet Russia
515
00:25:04,400 --> 00:25:07,400
were battling it out to be the first
to get there.
516
00:25:07,400 --> 00:25:10,240
The two countries were desperate
to prove they were the best.
517
00:25:10,240 --> 00:25:13,200
And the American president,
518
00:25:13,200 --> 00:25:15,720
John F Kennedy - ow, ow, ow, ow -
519
00:25:15,720 --> 00:25:19,160
vowed to beat the
Russian premier - ow, ow, ow, ow -
520
00:25:19,160 --> 00:25:21,120
Nikita Khrushchev,
and be the first
521
00:25:21,120 --> 00:25:24,040
to put a human being on the moon.
522
00:25:24,040 --> 00:25:30,400
America did it first,
on July 20th, 1969.
523
00:25:30,400 --> 00:25:36,000
Ow! Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin
set foot on the lunar surface.
524
00:25:36,000 --> 00:25:39,120
Ow, ow, ow! Take a bow,
525
00:25:39,120 --> 00:25:43,000
President John F Kennedy.
526
00:25:43,000 --> 00:25:44,400
I wish I could.
527
00:25:46,520 --> 00:25:47,800
Many years ago,
528
00:25:47,800 --> 00:25:50,440
the great British explorer
George Mallory,
529
00:25:50,440 --> 00:25:52,400
who would later die on Everest,
530
00:25:52,400 --> 00:25:55,240
was asked why he wanted to climb it.
531
00:25:55,240 --> 00:25:58,920
He said, "Because it is there."
532
00:25:59,920 --> 00:26:04,160
Now, space is there,
and we're going to climb it.
533
00:26:05,960 --> 00:26:11,040
Well, not climb it, erm, unless
there's some kind of space ladder.
534
00:26:11,040 --> 00:26:13,880
WHISPERS: Is there a space ladder?
No, not yet, sir.
535
00:26:14,920 --> 00:26:16,960
No, apparently,
there's not a space ladder.
536
00:26:16,960 --> 00:26:20,000
So we're going to fly to the moon,
because it is there.
537
00:26:20,000 --> 00:26:21,560
But we'd better do it quick,
538
00:26:21,560 --> 00:26:24,480
because the Russians have noticed
it's there too.
539
00:26:28,080 --> 00:26:31,960
♪ Come fly with me,
it's the key to the arms race
540
00:26:31,960 --> 00:26:35,760
♪ To win the Cold War
we need to be the first in space
541
00:26:35,760 --> 00:26:38,840
♪ There's knowledge to be gained
That's the main desire we nurse
542
00:26:38,840 --> 00:26:42,760
♪ Ha, you're rushing into space
but we Russians got there first
543
00:26:42,760 --> 00:26:49,360
♪ Our plans all went kaput-nik
when you pulled that Sputnik wheeze
544
00:26:49,360 --> 00:26:52,360
♪ So I vowed to beat you, chump
545
00:26:52,360 --> 00:26:56,600
♪ To that lunar lump of cheese
546
00:26:56,600 --> 00:27:00,320
♪ Flying to the moon
547
00:27:00,320 --> 00:27:04,040
♪ Who cares about the cost?
548
00:27:04,040 --> 00:27:09,440
♪ All that matters now is
if I win, that means he's lost
549
00:27:11,800 --> 00:27:14,440
♪ Our man Gagarin,
first in space, super-fly
550
00:27:14,440 --> 00:27:15,960
♪ Victorious
551
00:27:15,960 --> 00:27:18,640
♪ More like furious
Was he a spaceman or a spy?
552
00:27:18,640 --> 00:27:21,880
♪ And Voskhod was good,
we were the first to walk in space
553
00:27:21,880 --> 00:27:25,200
♪ But Gemini was better,
put us back in first place
554
00:27:25,200 --> 00:27:28,800
♪ Then Christmas '68, our Apollo 8
555
00:27:28,800 --> 00:27:32,680
♪ Around the moon did whizz
556
00:27:32,680 --> 00:27:36,160
♪ You call that a triumph?
Not exactly rocket science
557
00:27:36,160 --> 00:27:39,240
♪ Well, yes, it is
558
00:27:39,240 --> 00:27:43,480
♪ Flying to the moon
559
00:27:43,480 --> 00:27:46,840
♪ Won by the USA
560
00:27:46,840 --> 00:27:52,840
♪ Ha, I never craved that
lunar landing anyway
561
00:27:52,840 --> 00:27:54,440
♪ Whoa-oh!
562
00:27:54,440 --> 00:27:57,480
♪ Flying to the moon
563
00:27:57,480 --> 00:28:01,160
♪ Sure brings out your worst
564
00:28:01,160 --> 00:28:02,680
♪ Billions spent!
565
00:28:02,680 --> 00:28:06,560
♪ You're just mad
cos we got there first. ♪
566
00:28:08,920 --> 00:28:12,040
Russia didn't
want to go!
567
00:28:12,040 --> 00:28:13,440
THEY GRUNT
568
00:28:13,490 --> 00:28:18,040
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