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♪ Love ♪
2
00:00:14,648 --> 00:00:17,148
♪ Exciting and new ♪
3
00:00:18,719 --> 00:00:20,852
♪ Come aboard ♪
4
00:00:22,756 --> 00:00:26,436
♪ We're expecting you ♪
5
00:00:26,460 --> 00:00:28,960
♪ And love ♪
6
00:00:30,664 --> 00:00:34,677
♪ Life's sweetest reward ♪
7
00:00:34,701 --> 00:00:36,901
♪ Let it flow ♪
8
00:00:38,639 --> 00:00:42,818
♪ It floats back to you ♪
9
00:00:42,842 --> 00:00:46,223
♪ The Love Boat ♪
10
00:00:46,247 --> 00:00:50,993
♪ Soon will be
making Another run ♪
11
00:00:51,017 --> 00:00:54,231
♪ The Love Boat ♪
12
00:00:54,255 --> 00:00:58,868
♪ Promises something
For everyone ♪
13
00:00:58,892 --> 00:01:01,271
♪ Set a course for adventure ♪
14
00:01:01,295 --> 00:01:05,397
♪ Your mind on a new romance ♪
15
00:01:07,267 --> 00:01:10,846
♪ And love ♪
16
00:01:10,870 --> 00:01:13,505
♪ Won't hurt anymore ♪
17
00:01:15,041 --> 00:01:19,055
♪ It's an open smile ♪
18
00:01:19,079 --> 00:01:23,126
♪ On a friendly shore ♪
19
00:01:23,150 --> 00:01:27,763
♪ It's love ♪
20
00:01:27,787 --> 00:01:33,391
♪ Welcome aboard It's love ♪
21
00:02:02,522 --> 00:02:05,301
Excuse me, how
long before we sail?
22
00:02:05,325 --> 00:02:08,471
Oh, about another
half an hour, sir.
23
00:02:08,495 --> 00:02:09,839
Thank you. Don't worry.
24
00:02:09,863 --> 00:02:11,040
She'll make it.
25
00:02:11,064 --> 00:02:12,175
Pardon me?
26
00:02:12,199 --> 00:02:15,678
Well, I figure a
handsome man like you...
27
00:02:15,702 --> 00:02:17,702
Well, thank you again. Mm-hm.
28
00:02:26,446 --> 00:02:28,691
Uh, yes, sir, that's, uh,
the late-sitting dinner.
29
00:02:28,715 --> 00:02:31,460
Eight o'clock. Thank
you. Welcome aboard.
30
00:02:31,484 --> 00:02:32,728
Uh, ma'am, yes.
31
00:02:32,752 --> 00:02:37,133
Mrs. Corwin, you're
in 130, Fiesta Deck.
32
00:02:37,157 --> 00:02:40,169
Me? I'm standing right here.
33
00:02:40,193 --> 00:02:43,106
You must have me mixed
up with another Mrs. Corwin.
34
00:02:43,130 --> 00:02:46,242
No, ma'am, I meant your
cabin's on Fiesta Deck.
35
00:02:46,266 --> 00:02:48,111
Room 130.
36
00:02:48,135 --> 00:02:50,135
Oh, thank you.
37
00:02:51,104 --> 00:02:52,681
Hi. Welcome aboard.
38
00:02:52,705 --> 00:02:55,118
Uh, let's see...
Okay, you first.
39
00:02:55,142 --> 00:02:57,353
Uh, that's Aloha Deck.
That's right through here.
40
00:02:57,377 --> 00:02:59,289
Cabin 325.
41
00:02:59,313 --> 00:03:00,657
Now, let's see...
Oh, Doc, listen,
42
00:03:00,681 --> 00:03:02,425
give me a hand, will
you? I'm going crazy here.
43
00:03:02,449 --> 00:03:03,426
Are you kidding?
44
00:03:03,450 --> 00:03:05,094
I'm a physician,
not a room clerk.
45
00:03:08,188 --> 00:03:10,800
Well, maybe just
this once. Excuse me.
46
00:03:10,824 --> 00:03:12,802
Uh, excuse me. Well, hi.
47
00:03:12,826 --> 00:03:14,137
Welcome aboard.
48
00:03:14,161 --> 00:03:15,671
Uh, thanks, Doc. I'll take over.
49
00:03:15,695 --> 00:03:17,974
Hi. I'm Yeoman Purser Smith.
50
00:03:17,998 --> 00:03:19,309
Dr. Adam Bricker.
51
00:03:19,333 --> 00:03:20,977
I'm Melanie Taylor, and...
52
00:03:21,001 --> 00:03:23,361
And this is my friend Jane Cole.
53
00:03:24,371 --> 00:03:25,748
And if you'll help
us find our cabin,
54
00:03:25,772 --> 00:03:27,016
you'll have a friend for life.
55
00:03:27,040 --> 00:03:28,185
I'll not only help you find it,
56
00:03:28,209 --> 00:03:29,920
I'll move in with you.
57
00:03:29,944 --> 00:03:32,355
Well, with Jane and
me and only two beds,
58
00:03:32,379 --> 00:03:34,391
I think it'll be a little
bit crowded, don't you?
59
00:03:34,415 --> 00:03:36,492
Oh, I don't mind
doubling up if you don't.
60
00:03:36,516 --> 00:03:38,094
Ah.
61
00:03:38,118 --> 00:03:40,129
As the ship's official
medical representative,
62
00:03:40,153 --> 00:03:41,331
I have to veto that idea.
63
00:03:41,355 --> 00:03:44,100
Overcrowded cabins are
a serious health hazard.
64
00:03:44,124 --> 00:03:46,536
Oh, and... And what do
you suggest we do, doctor?
65
00:03:46,560 --> 00:03:50,172
Well, come to my cabin instead.
66
00:03:50,196 --> 00:03:53,276
Can I come too? I always
wanted to see how doctors operate.
67
00:03:53,300 --> 00:03:56,712
Here you go, guys. You're in
Cabin C-122 on the Coral Deck.
68
00:03:56,736 --> 00:03:58,514
Have a wonderful cruise.
69
00:03:58,538 --> 00:04:00,416
Thanks, babe.
70
00:04:00,440 --> 00:04:02,085
Hello, beautiful lady.
71
00:04:02,109 --> 00:04:05,154
Hi. I'm Mike Andrews. This
is my friend Doug Ketcham.
72
00:04:05,178 --> 00:04:07,824
And we've come to
rescue you from this, uh,
73
00:04:07,848 --> 00:04:09,425
dangerous nautical type.
74
00:04:09,449 --> 00:04:11,127
Do I look like I need rescuing?
75
00:04:11,151 --> 00:04:14,097
You really can't trust a
grown man in a sailor suit.
76
00:04:14,121 --> 00:04:16,066
Okay, then I'll put
on my stethoscope.
77
00:04:16,090 --> 00:04:18,034
We could play doctor.
78
00:04:18,058 --> 00:04:20,203
Uh, Melanie, I-I don't
want to scare you,
79
00:04:20,227 --> 00:04:22,338
but if you attract any more
guys to this side of the ship,
80
00:04:22,362 --> 00:04:23,394
it's gonna list.
81
00:04:24,831 --> 00:04:25,930
Thank you.
82
00:04:27,868 --> 00:04:29,245
Hm.
83
00:04:29,269 --> 00:04:32,181
And you are on
Promenade Deck, Cabin 340,
84
00:04:32,205 --> 00:04:33,316
and that's the early sitting.
85
00:04:33,340 --> 00:04:34,650
Thank you. Welcome aboard.
86
00:04:34,674 --> 00:04:36,619
Uh... Uh, can't you
process the passengers
87
00:04:36,643 --> 00:04:38,888
more efficiently, purser? I
mean, I've been standing here
88
00:04:38,912 --> 00:04:40,923
for three minutes and
14 seconds by the clock.
89
00:04:40,947 --> 00:04:42,158
Well, I'm sorry, sir.
90
00:04:42,182 --> 00:04:43,893
Everybody's just
boarding at once.
91
00:04:43,917 --> 00:04:45,462
That's, uh, 21 seconds.
92
00:04:45,486 --> 00:04:46,830
The name is Waterman.
93
00:04:46,854 --> 00:04:48,420
Waterman.
94
00:04:51,425 --> 00:04:52,402
Dusty.
95
00:04:52,426 --> 00:04:54,604
Mr. Dusty Waterman.
96
00:04:54,628 --> 00:04:56,339
Uh, Marvin.
97
00:04:56,363 --> 00:04:57,573
Oh, Dusty Marvin.
98
00:04:57,597 --> 00:04:59,608
Good, I don't have a Waterman.
99
00:04:59,632 --> 00:05:02,245
But, Gopher, I can't
find Fiesta Deck.
100
00:05:02,269 --> 00:05:03,913
Well, I'm sure it's
where we left it, ma'am.
101
00:05:03,937 --> 00:05:06,182
Listen, just through the
lobby, into the elevator
102
00:05:06,206 --> 00:05:08,417
and down a floor.
Oh, thank you, Gopher.
103
00:05:08,441 --> 00:05:09,952
Not at all. Oh,
104
00:05:09,976 --> 00:05:11,454
and I've forgotten
my cabin number
105
00:05:11,478 --> 00:05:14,089
and I don't know
what time dinner is.
106
00:05:14,113 --> 00:05:15,691
One-thirty.
107
00:05:15,715 --> 00:05:17,749
Isn't that early for dinner?
108
00:05:18,886 --> 00:05:20,396
No, that's your cabin number.
109
00:05:20,420 --> 00:05:22,165
Dinner is at 8.
110
00:05:22,189 --> 00:05:23,333
Oh.
111
00:05:23,357 --> 00:05:24,967
Now I've got
everything straight.
112
00:05:24,991 --> 00:05:25,968
Good.
113
00:05:25,992 --> 00:05:28,871
Where's the lobby?
114
00:05:28,895 --> 00:05:30,573
Close your eyes.
115
00:05:33,534 --> 00:05:35,211
Ta-da!
116
00:05:35,235 --> 00:05:36,746
Oh, thank you, Gopher.
117
00:05:36,770 --> 00:05:38,515
Uh, Marvin Waterman.
118
00:05:38,539 --> 00:05:41,117
It's been exactly five minutes,
18 seconds on the nose.
119
00:05:41,141 --> 00:05:42,619
Yes, sir.
120
00:05:46,080 --> 00:05:47,457
Hi.
121
00:05:47,481 --> 00:05:49,926
Uh, Zidreczky, Zidreczky.
122
00:05:49,950 --> 00:05:53,830
Oh, Zidreczky. Oh...
Ah, Mr. Zidreczky,
123
00:05:53,854 --> 00:05:56,132
uh, I'm taking
care of Mr., uh...?
124
00:05:56,156 --> 00:05:57,133
Waterman.
125
00:05:57,157 --> 00:06:00,892
Uh... Uh, you wait.
126
00:06:01,829 --> 00:06:03,139
Wait.
127
00:06:03,163 --> 00:06:08,244
You, uh, Promenade
Deck, three... Three.
128
00:06:08,268 --> 00:06:09,746
Can I just show you? Yes.
129
00:06:09,770 --> 00:06:11,814
Obviously a language barrier.
130
00:06:11,838 --> 00:06:14,984
Just go up these
stairs and turn right.
131
00:06:15,008 --> 00:06:18,120
So why don't you just slip into
something casual and have fun.
132
00:06:18,144 --> 00:06:20,144
This is something casual.
133
00:06:23,083 --> 00:06:24,282
Gopher.
134
00:06:25,919 --> 00:06:28,498
You should hear this too.
135
00:06:28,522 --> 00:06:32,035
I just had a tip from one of
my friends at the head office.
136
00:06:32,059 --> 00:06:35,171
A line is sending one of
their inspectors on this cruise.
137
00:06:35,195 --> 00:06:37,006
Now, he'll be
checking up on all of us
138
00:06:37,030 --> 00:06:40,543
and sending back a report
on how we perform our duties.
139
00:06:40,567 --> 00:06:42,078
Now, my advice to all of you is:
140
00:06:42,102 --> 00:06:43,880
watch your step.
141
00:06:43,904 --> 00:06:45,114
What's the problem, sir?
142
00:06:45,138 --> 00:06:46,916
We'll treat him like a king.
143
00:06:46,940 --> 00:06:49,051
The problem is, I
don't know who he is.
144
00:06:49,075 --> 00:06:51,287
Could be anyone on the ship.
145
00:06:51,311 --> 00:06:53,444
Well, it's not me.
That narrows it down.
146
00:06:55,048 --> 00:06:57,259
Sir, you have
nothing to worry about.
147
00:06:57,283 --> 00:06:58,895
We're a great crew.
148
00:06:58,919 --> 00:07:03,633
Sure. When it comes to services,
we cover the bases from A to Z.
149
00:07:03,657 --> 00:07:07,237
Z! Oh, I left Mr. Zidreczky
out on the deck.
150
00:07:08,695 --> 00:07:10,995
We better start worrying.
151
00:07:14,601 --> 00:07:15,678
Sarah.
152
00:07:15,702 --> 00:07:16,679
Hi.
153
00:07:16,703 --> 00:07:17,780
Oh.
154
00:07:17,804 --> 00:07:21,150
Baby... you look gorgeous.
155
00:07:21,174 --> 00:07:22,652
Oh.
156
00:07:22,676 --> 00:07:25,321
I couldn't have changed
that much in three weeks.
157
00:07:25,345 --> 00:07:28,891
I don't know. Three weeks
without you is much, much more
158
00:07:28,915 --> 00:07:30,760
than 21 days.
159
00:07:30,784 --> 00:07:33,596
No wonder he was nervous.
She's worth waiting for.
160
00:07:33,620 --> 00:07:34,897
Well, he's not exactly
161
00:07:34,921 --> 00:07:37,922
yesterday's mashed
potatoes either.
162
00:07:39,459 --> 00:07:41,137
Worth waiting for, isn't she?
163
00:07:41,161 --> 00:07:43,139
That's what Doc was just saying.
164
00:07:43,163 --> 00:07:46,075
And then Julie said
you're... Uh, excuse me.
165
00:07:46,099 --> 00:07:47,844
You're Mr., uh...? Sherwood.
166
00:07:47,868 --> 00:07:49,546
Brian Sherwood.
167
00:07:49,570 --> 00:07:53,016
And this is Mrs. Sarah Lambert.
168
00:07:53,040 --> 00:07:54,184
Well, how do you do?
169
00:07:54,208 --> 00:07:55,184
Hi.
170
00:07:55,208 --> 00:07:56,186
Let's see.
171
00:07:56,210 --> 00:07:58,454
Mr. Sherwood,
you're in Cabin 350
172
00:07:58,478 --> 00:07:59,822
on the Promenade Deck.
173
00:07:59,846 --> 00:08:02,691
And Mrs. Lambert...
Well, what do you know?
174
00:08:02,715 --> 00:08:05,161
You're right next
door, Cabin 348.
175
00:08:05,185 --> 00:08:07,797
They're connected. Thank you.
176
00:08:07,821 --> 00:08:09,498
You didn't have
to get two rooms.
177
00:08:09,522 --> 00:08:11,935
Well, I thought you
might like some privacy.
178
00:08:11,959 --> 00:08:14,203
Besides, I didn't want
to tarnish your reputation.
179
00:09:04,544 --> 00:09:07,624
You know, that
Mike is really cute.
180
00:09:07,648 --> 00:09:09,325
I've got my eye on him.
181
00:09:09,349 --> 00:09:10,993
Yeah, and if you saw
the look in his eyes,
182
00:09:11,017 --> 00:09:12,394
you'd know the
feeling is mutual.
183
00:09:12,418 --> 00:09:14,530
Not to mention the
other three guys.
184
00:09:14,554 --> 00:09:16,231
You're gonna have
a ball, as usual.
185
00:09:16,255 --> 00:09:17,433
Well, you are too.
186
00:09:17,457 --> 00:09:18,801
Oh, I don't know.
187
00:09:18,825 --> 00:09:21,003
I wish you never talked me
into coming on this cruise.
188
00:09:21,027 --> 00:09:22,572
Why?
189
00:09:22,596 --> 00:09:24,974
Well, because this is
your scene, not mine.
190
00:09:24,998 --> 00:09:27,209
And I'm afraid I'm
gonna be a drag to you.
191
00:09:27,233 --> 00:09:30,613
Oh, you are not. Now, come
on, none of this negative stuff.
192
00:09:30,637 --> 00:09:32,415
We're both gonna
have a great time,
193
00:09:32,439 --> 00:09:34,417
and we're gonna
have lots of dates.
194
00:09:34,441 --> 00:09:37,019
Yeah, you'll get the
dates and I'll get the pits.
195
00:09:45,218 --> 00:09:47,931
You mean, the front office
sent somebody onboard
196
00:09:47,955 --> 00:09:49,132
to check up on us?
197
00:09:49,156 --> 00:09:50,399
Yeah, but as Julie says,
198
00:09:50,423 --> 00:09:52,735
we don't have
anything to worry about.
199
00:09:52,759 --> 00:09:54,938
Hey, we're a terrific crew.
200
00:09:54,962 --> 00:09:55,938
I don't know.
201
00:09:55,962 --> 00:09:57,440
A friend of mine, Cleofus,
202
00:09:57,464 --> 00:10:00,109
now, he thought he was
part of a pretty good crew too.
203
00:10:00,133 --> 00:10:02,478
But after the inspector
came on his ship,
204
00:10:02,502 --> 00:10:05,347
they fired the engineer,
the cruise director
205
00:10:05,371 --> 00:10:07,216
and half the kitchen staff.
206
00:10:07,240 --> 00:10:10,753
Boy, that guy must've
been pretty tough.
207
00:10:10,777 --> 00:10:12,155
Uh, excuse me,
208
00:10:12,179 --> 00:10:13,889
can you tell me where
the doctor's office is?
209
00:10:13,913 --> 00:10:15,858
Oh, I'm the doctor.
210
00:10:15,882 --> 00:10:17,593
Is anything bothering you?
211
00:10:17,617 --> 00:10:19,428
No.
212
00:10:19,452 --> 00:10:22,632
Well, then, uh, why are you
looking for the doctor's office?
213
00:10:22,656 --> 00:10:25,701
Well, just in case
something was bothering me,
214
00:10:25,725 --> 00:10:27,565
I wanted to know where to go.
215
00:10:28,662 --> 00:10:30,139
But it wouldn't matter anyway,
216
00:10:30,163 --> 00:10:32,041
because if I went there,
you wouldn't be there.
217
00:10:32,065 --> 00:10:33,409
You'd be here.
218
00:10:33,433 --> 00:10:36,980
Well, in that case,
they'd page me
219
00:10:37,004 --> 00:10:39,203
and I'd come to you
wherever you were.
220
00:10:41,007 --> 00:10:44,754
Well, if you'd come
to me wherever I was,
221
00:10:44,778 --> 00:10:47,245
then what do you
need an office for?
222
00:10:53,519 --> 00:10:55,164
She could be the inspector.
223
00:10:55,188 --> 00:10:59,234
It's obvious they aren't gonna
send us anybody too obvious.
224
00:10:59,258 --> 00:11:00,503
Obviously.
225
00:11:00,527 --> 00:11:04,173
But she's so unobvious
it makes her obvious.
226
00:11:04,197 --> 00:11:06,142
Ah. I didn't think of that.
227
00:11:06,166 --> 00:11:07,231
Obviously.
228
00:11:08,668 --> 00:11:10,312
Aha.
229
00:11:10,336 --> 00:11:14,083
I think I know who
the inspector is.
230
00:11:14,107 --> 00:11:17,975
Did you ever see a more
suspicious-looking pair of legs?
231
00:11:23,750 --> 00:11:25,361
We can't take any chances.
232
00:11:25,385 --> 00:11:28,865
Uh-uh. I'd better
go investigate.
233
00:11:33,526 --> 00:11:35,204
Hi.
234
00:11:40,199 --> 00:11:41,244
Thank you. Mm-hm.
235
00:11:41,268 --> 00:11:42,845
Thank you, Isaac. Sure.
236
00:11:42,869 --> 00:11:45,681
Oh, would you, uh, start
a tab for me, please?
237
00:11:45,705 --> 00:11:47,716
Uh, Promenade Cabin 348.
238
00:11:47,740 --> 00:11:50,686
No, I'm in 348. You're
in 350. Oh, that's right.
239
00:11:50,710 --> 00:11:52,855
Cabin 350, please.
Oh, I'd better watch you.
240
00:11:52,879 --> 00:11:55,158
You know it's pretty tough
when a guy can't sneak a drink
241
00:11:55,182 --> 00:11:56,559
through on a girl's bill.
242
00:12:00,553 --> 00:12:01,564
You okay?
243
00:12:01,588 --> 00:12:02,765
Oh, fine.
244
00:12:02,789 --> 00:12:04,467
Just, uh, add a
little cough syrup
245
00:12:04,491 --> 00:12:05,734
to my next martini, will you?
246
00:12:05,758 --> 00:12:07,403
Is there any other
way to make 'em?
247
00:12:09,896 --> 00:12:10,896
Well...
248
00:12:12,098 --> 00:12:15,644
to, uh... our time together.
249
00:12:15,668 --> 00:12:17,635
That's my favorite toast.
250
00:12:22,609 --> 00:12:23,886
How's your husband?
251
00:12:23,910 --> 00:12:27,145
You never can bring yourself
to call him by his name.
252
00:12:28,280 --> 00:12:30,559
Fred. How is he?
253
00:12:30,583 --> 00:12:32,516
He's well.
254
00:12:33,986 --> 00:12:35,098
And the marriage?
255
00:12:35,122 --> 00:12:36,365
Better.
256
00:12:36,389 --> 00:12:37,800
Not good, but better.
257
00:12:37,824 --> 00:12:40,436
Are you planning
to stay with him?
258
00:12:40,460 --> 00:12:43,039
I think so.
259
00:12:43,063 --> 00:12:44,328
For the children.
260
00:12:46,800 --> 00:12:48,744
That's always a
difficult decision.
261
00:12:48,768 --> 00:12:50,579
Very.
262
00:12:50,603 --> 00:12:54,750
Let's see, you've been
divorced for four years now.
263
00:12:54,774 --> 00:12:57,075
Look how long you stayed
married for your children.
264
00:12:59,379 --> 00:13:01,724
If you ever decide... Please.
265
00:13:01,748 --> 00:13:04,494
This is supposed to
be our time together
266
00:13:04,518 --> 00:13:06,684
away from the rest of the world.
267
00:13:08,621 --> 00:13:09,932
You're right.
268
00:13:09,956 --> 00:13:10,956
I'm sorry.
269
00:13:13,994 --> 00:13:15,637
Mmm.
270
00:13:15,661 --> 00:13:17,573
Well, excuse me, both of you.
271
00:13:17,597 --> 00:13:20,242
I'm gonna go pick up
some film in the gift shop.
272
00:13:20,266 --> 00:13:23,212
Oh, well, thank
you. I have to go too.
273
00:13:23,236 --> 00:13:25,716
I, uh... I hear they're
having a sale on scalpels.
274
00:13:37,550 --> 00:13:39,127
Hi, Jane. Where's Melanie?
275
00:13:39,151 --> 00:13:41,597
Oh, um, she went to
the gift shop with Doc.
276
00:13:41,621 --> 00:13:44,021
Oh. Thanks, Jane. See you later.
277
00:13:53,800 --> 00:13:55,411
Hi, Jane. Hi.
278
00:13:55,435 --> 00:13:57,846
Where's Melanie?
279
00:13:57,870 --> 00:13:59,882
She's in the gift shop
with Doc and Mike.
280
00:13:59,906 --> 00:14:01,639
Thanks. See you around.
281
00:14:05,912 --> 00:14:07,712
She's in the gift shop.
282
00:14:41,948 --> 00:14:43,758
You've had this lovely
young lady long enough.
283
00:14:43,782 --> 00:14:45,827
Time to share with a friend.
284
00:14:45,851 --> 00:14:48,664
Some things you don't
share, even with your friend.
285
00:14:48,688 --> 00:14:51,433
Very possessive, isn't
he? You think this is bad?
286
00:14:51,457 --> 00:14:53,617
You should see how
he is with his teddy bear.
287
00:15:08,374 --> 00:15:10,920
I love watching them.
288
00:15:10,944 --> 00:15:12,687
They have such a
good time together.
289
00:15:12,711 --> 00:15:13,956
They're always touching.
290
00:15:13,980 --> 00:15:15,257
Who?
291
00:15:15,281 --> 00:15:17,126
Mr. Sherwood and his friend.
292
00:15:22,488 --> 00:15:24,533
That's not touching.
That's cradle snatching.
293
00:15:24,557 --> 00:15:27,603
Oh, you don't have a
poetic bone in your body.
294
00:15:27,627 --> 00:15:31,374
Well, Julie, he is a little old
for her, wouldn't you say?
295
00:15:31,398 --> 00:15:33,297
I think you're jealous.
296
00:15:36,135 --> 00:15:37,780
Good evening.
297
00:15:37,804 --> 00:15:40,315
Good evening, sir.
Good evening, captain.
298
00:15:40,339 --> 00:15:43,586
Captain, you're a
man of the world.
299
00:15:43,610 --> 00:15:45,388
Why, thank you.
300
00:15:45,412 --> 00:15:46,955
Wouldn't you say
that man over there
301
00:15:46,979 --> 00:15:49,880
is just a little bit
too old for that lady?
302
00:15:53,053 --> 00:15:56,699
I don't know. He looks about
five years older than I do.
303
00:15:56,723 --> 00:15:58,055
Older? Tsk.
304
00:15:59,158 --> 00:16:00,135
Five years older?
305
00:16:00,159 --> 00:16:01,726
Gee, I would have guessed ten.
306
00:16:03,263 --> 00:16:06,430
Yes, I, uh... I can see
myself with a woman that age.
307
00:16:08,768 --> 00:16:10,301
They do look happy together.
308
00:16:12,238 --> 00:16:13,549
Well, if it works for them,
309
00:16:13,573 --> 00:16:15,839
that's what's
important, isn't it?
310
00:16:16,676 --> 00:16:19,287
After all, it is their affair.
311
00:16:19,311 --> 00:16:21,078
That's the word for it.
312
00:16:23,383 --> 00:16:25,727
Ah, now, here's your drink, sir.
313
00:16:25,751 --> 00:16:27,529
Thank you.
314
00:16:27,553 --> 00:16:30,532
Say, uh, how come you're
not out on the dance floor
315
00:16:30,556 --> 00:16:33,069
dancing with one of
those beautiful ladies?
316
00:16:33,093 --> 00:16:35,237
Your crew has them all.
317
00:16:35,261 --> 00:16:37,440
When do they find
time to do their work?
318
00:16:37,464 --> 00:16:40,009
Well, that is
part of their work.
319
00:16:40,033 --> 00:16:42,333
That's why they
never go on strike.
320
00:16:44,237 --> 00:16:45,869
On strike.
321
00:16:53,480 --> 00:16:55,391
May I cut in for
medical reasons?
322
00:16:55,415 --> 00:16:56,859
What medical reasons?
323
00:16:56,883 --> 00:16:58,683
I'm sick of you
dancing with her.
324
00:17:08,794 --> 00:17:09,905
Hi, Jane.
325
00:17:09,929 --> 00:17:12,040
Hi, Gopher.
326
00:17:12,064 --> 00:17:14,076
Listen, um, when
Melanie gets back,
327
00:17:14,100 --> 00:17:15,844
would you please
tell that drink's for her?
328
00:17:17,002 --> 00:17:18,314
Oh, of course.
329
00:17:18,338 --> 00:17:19,948
Thanks.
330
00:17:19,972 --> 00:17:21,483
Having a good time?
331
00:17:21,507 --> 00:17:22,584
Oh, yeah.
332
00:17:22,608 --> 00:17:24,220
Good.
333
00:17:24,244 --> 00:17:25,487
Bye.
334
00:17:25,511 --> 00:17:27,155
Bye.
335
00:17:28,281 --> 00:17:29,891
I'm definitely
having a thrilling time
336
00:17:29,915 --> 00:17:34,185
watching Melanie dance
and watching Melanie's drink.
337
00:17:39,192 --> 00:17:40,202
May I cut in?
338
00:17:40,226 --> 00:17:42,159
Sure, try that
couple over there.
339
00:17:43,263 --> 00:17:44,462
Get lost, pal.
340
00:17:46,799 --> 00:17:48,266
Welcome home.
341
00:17:57,209 --> 00:17:59,910
I don't know. Can
you hum a few bars?
342
00:18:03,649 --> 00:18:05,860
Do you mind sharing this table?
343
00:18:05,884 --> 00:18:07,262
Oh, not at all.
344
00:18:07,286 --> 00:18:08,263
Who with?
345
00:18:08,287 --> 00:18:09,798
Me.
346
00:18:09,822 --> 00:18:12,668
Oh. Oh, excuse me.
347
00:18:12,692 --> 00:18:14,036
I'm such a ninny.
348
00:18:15,928 --> 00:18:17,606
Beautiful day, wasn't it?
349
00:18:17,630 --> 00:18:19,441
Mm, yes.
350
00:18:19,465 --> 00:18:20,809
Did you take a swim?
351
00:18:20,833 --> 00:18:23,279
Well, I was going
to, but I didn't know
352
00:18:23,303 --> 00:18:25,263
how I'd get back
on the ship again.
353
00:18:26,672 --> 00:18:29,118
Uh, didn't anyone tell
you about the ship's pool?
354
00:18:29,142 --> 00:18:31,442
Oh, I never gamble.
355
00:18:34,113 --> 00:18:35,925
Very interesting.
356
00:18:37,316 --> 00:18:38,782
Gamble.
357
00:18:40,653 --> 00:18:43,098
Well, I know who
the inspector is.
358
00:18:43,122 --> 00:18:44,232
Who?
359
00:18:44,256 --> 00:18:46,035
It's Mr. Waterman.
360
00:18:48,528 --> 00:18:50,906
He's been asking all
the passengers questions
361
00:18:50,930 --> 00:18:53,542
and taking notes.
362
00:18:53,566 --> 00:18:56,178
That's the guy that was checking
for dirt and walking around
363
00:18:56,202 --> 00:18:57,846
with a stopwatch.
364
00:18:57,870 --> 00:18:58,914
What'll we do?
365
00:18:58,938 --> 00:19:00,649
We don't do anything.
366
00:19:00,673 --> 00:19:03,841
We treat him exactly the
same as any other passenger.
367
00:19:07,580 --> 00:19:09,258
Hi, Mr. Waterman. How
are you this evening?
368
00:19:09,282 --> 00:19:11,227
Fine. Would you like to dance?
369
00:19:11,251 --> 00:19:12,761
Feeling all right,
sir? Mr. Waterman,
370
00:19:12,785 --> 00:19:14,262
I got some champagne here...
371
00:19:14,286 --> 00:19:15,931
Wait a minute, wait a
minute, wait a minute.
372
00:19:15,955 --> 00:19:18,634
Uh, would you care to
come up to see the bridge?
373
00:19:18,658 --> 00:19:20,123
Oh, excuse me.
374
00:19:29,968 --> 00:19:31,068
Mm.
375
00:19:39,111 --> 00:19:41,090
Why don't you come
in for a while, Mike.
376
00:19:41,114 --> 00:19:43,192
Well, I don't usually go to
a strange woman's cabin
377
00:19:43,216 --> 00:19:44,193
on the first date.
378
00:19:44,217 --> 00:19:46,528
Oh. But, uh, in your case,
379
00:19:46,552 --> 00:19:48,486
I'll make an exception.
380
00:19:54,927 --> 00:19:56,137
Oh, Janie,
381
00:19:56,161 --> 00:19:58,707
um, I didn't mean
to disturb you.
382
00:19:58,731 --> 00:20:00,230
See you later, okay?
383
00:20:02,402 --> 00:20:04,012
Well, now what are we gonna do?
384
00:20:04,036 --> 00:20:05,246
How about your cabin?
385
00:20:05,270 --> 00:20:07,248
Same problem. Doug's in there.
386
00:20:07,272 --> 00:20:09,952
Well, I guess it's back
to the Acapulco Lounge.
387
00:20:09,976 --> 00:20:13,176
I wasn't exactly in the
mood for more dancing.
388
00:20:16,582 --> 00:20:18,293
Uh-huh.
389
00:20:18,317 --> 00:20:21,330
Oh, Doug, am I glad to see you.
390
00:20:21,354 --> 00:20:22,331
You are?
391
00:20:22,355 --> 00:20:24,066
Yeah, I have a big
favor to ask you.
392
00:20:24,090 --> 00:20:25,901
You want me to get
rid of this masher?
393
00:20:25,925 --> 00:20:27,469
Ha-ha. No, no.
394
00:20:27,493 --> 00:20:29,338
I want you to get
rid of my roommate.
395
00:20:29,362 --> 00:20:31,073
How about asking
her out for a drink?
396
00:20:31,097 --> 00:20:33,142
Yeah, for old time's sake.
What do you say, old buddy?
397
00:20:33,166 --> 00:20:34,509
Well, if I don't,
you guys are going
398
00:20:34,533 --> 00:20:35,844
to make a spectacle
of yourselves
399
00:20:35,868 --> 00:20:37,012
here in the passageway
400
00:20:37,036 --> 00:20:38,514
and embarrass
the hell out of me.
401
00:20:38,538 --> 00:20:40,298
Thanks, Doug. Thanks, old buddy.
402
00:20:46,211 --> 00:20:47,388
Oh, hi, Jane.
403
00:20:47,412 --> 00:20:48,957
Uh, Melanie's out.
404
00:20:48,981 --> 00:20:50,926
I'm not looking for
Melanie. I'm looking for you.
405
00:20:50,950 --> 00:20:52,594
Would you like to
have a drink with me?
406
00:20:52,618 --> 00:20:55,853
So who'd you lose
out to, Doc or Mike?
407
00:20:57,223 --> 00:20:58,200
Mike.
408
00:20:58,224 --> 00:21:00,224
Figures. Let me get my purse.
409
00:21:02,395 --> 00:21:03,395
Let's go.
410
00:21:25,251 --> 00:21:26,494
There you go, Mr. Waterman.
411
00:21:26,518 --> 00:21:27,830
Can I get you
another pillow, sir?
412
00:21:27,854 --> 00:21:28,931
No.
413
00:21:28,955 --> 00:21:30,532
Can I get you something
to help you sleep?
414
00:21:30,556 --> 00:21:32,401
No, thank you. How
about a little nightcap?
415
00:21:32,425 --> 00:21:34,469
No. Listen, if you people
don't let me get some sleep,
416
00:21:34,493 --> 00:21:36,371
I'll never be able
to finish my book.
417
00:21:36,395 --> 00:21:38,206
Your book? Of course.
418
00:21:38,230 --> 00:21:41,443
I'm a writer. Why do you think
I've been making those notes?
419
00:21:41,467 --> 00:21:43,111
You're not an inspector?
420
00:21:43,135 --> 00:21:45,447
An inspector? I'm an author.
421
00:21:45,471 --> 00:21:46,915
You mean, you
haven't read my books?
422
00:21:46,939 --> 00:21:49,184
Heh. Well, they're
absolute classics.
423
00:21:49,208 --> 00:21:50,352
Take this one:
424
00:21:50,376 --> 00:21:52,287
uh, Marvin the Horse
Goes Skydiving.
425
00:21:52,311 --> 00:21:53,756
It's very, very popular.
426
00:21:53,780 --> 00:21:55,423
Marvin the Fish
Goes to Hollywood.
427
00:21:55,447 --> 00:21:56,591
Ooh.
428
00:21:56,615 --> 00:21:58,427
Marvin the Mosquito
Falls in Love.
429
00:21:58,451 --> 00:22:00,429
Oh, hey, I missed that one.
430
00:22:00,453 --> 00:22:02,998
When I was a kid,
for Pete's sake.
431
00:22:03,022 --> 00:22:05,500
Please leave me alone so I
can finish my latest and greatest:
432
00:22:05,524 --> 00:22:07,770
Marvin the Camel Takes a Cruise.
433
00:22:07,794 --> 00:22:09,104
And you're all in it.
434
00:22:10,562 --> 00:22:13,208
We're sorry, Mr. Waterman.
We'll leave you alone.
435
00:22:13,232 --> 00:22:15,043
Have a good evening. Yes.
436
00:22:15,067 --> 00:22:16,566
Won't bother you again.
437
00:22:18,938 --> 00:22:20,115
Good night.
438
00:22:28,347 --> 00:22:29,613
Do you mind?
439
00:22:30,849 --> 00:22:31,849
I love your work.
440
00:22:35,821 --> 00:22:38,767
Oh, terrific.
441
00:22:38,791 --> 00:22:40,636
They're in there
and I'm out here.
442
00:22:40,660 --> 00:22:42,704
Now where am I
supposed to sleep?
443
00:22:42,728 --> 00:22:45,006
I knew I shouldn't have
come on this trip with her.
444
00:22:45,030 --> 00:22:47,042
She always does this to me.
445
00:22:47,066 --> 00:22:48,543
You can sleep in my cabin.
446
00:22:49,568 --> 00:22:50,979
Doug, we just met.
447
00:22:51,003 --> 00:22:52,847
Oh, no, that... That's
not what I meant.
448
00:22:52,871 --> 00:22:54,371
I'm not asking you to, uh...
449
00:22:55,941 --> 00:22:57,152
Well, you know what I mean.
450
00:22:57,176 --> 00:22:58,987
No, I don't. What do you mean?
451
00:22:59,011 --> 00:23:00,889
Well, Mike's
inside with Melanie,
452
00:23:00,913 --> 00:23:03,558
so obviously there's an
empty bed in my cabin.
453
00:23:03,582 --> 00:23:05,761
You might as well
use it. It's convenient.
454
00:23:05,785 --> 00:23:07,396
Too convenient.
455
00:23:07,420 --> 00:23:11,400
I promise I'll sleep on my side
and you'll sleep on your side.
456
00:23:11,424 --> 00:23:14,057
There'll be no
hanky-panky. Scout's honor.
457
00:23:15,227 --> 00:23:16,704
Well,
458
00:23:16,728 --> 00:23:19,174
if you can't trust a
scout, who can you trust?
459
00:23:19,198 --> 00:23:20,175
Right.
460
00:23:20,199 --> 00:23:22,511
Just promise me one thing. What?
461
00:23:22,535 --> 00:23:24,746
Don't rub two sticks
together and start a fire.
462
00:23:24,770 --> 00:23:26,236
Heh-heh. Oh.
463
00:23:34,413 --> 00:23:36,691
You'll never get tired
of New York, will you?
464
00:23:36,715 --> 00:23:38,093
Never.
465
00:23:38,117 --> 00:23:39,994
It's one of a kind.
466
00:23:40,018 --> 00:23:43,298
The men always wear ties and
the ladies always wear dresses,
467
00:23:43,322 --> 00:23:45,701
and the city is always on
the verge of bankruptcy.
468
00:23:47,360 --> 00:23:49,270
What about Beverly Hills?
469
00:23:49,294 --> 00:23:50,772
Oh, it never changes.
470
00:23:50,796 --> 00:23:54,743
We all sit there in our $60
jeans and watch the smog.
471
00:23:54,767 --> 00:23:56,578
Charming.
472
00:23:56,602 --> 00:23:59,147
Oh, you should see
my new penthouse.
473
00:23:59,171 --> 00:24:00,282
Knowing how you like flowers,
474
00:24:00,306 --> 00:24:03,251
I, uh, planted a
whole roof garden.
475
00:24:03,275 --> 00:24:06,188
How do you get anything to
grow in that New York soot?
476
00:24:06,212 --> 00:24:09,524
I figured out a way. I
planted black flowers.
477
00:24:10,749 --> 00:24:13,061
When are you coming
back to L.A. again?
478
00:24:13,085 --> 00:24:15,731
Oh, in about, um,
a month, I hope.
479
00:24:16,755 --> 00:24:17,755
Pardon.
480
00:24:23,729 --> 00:24:25,174
They look better
on you than on Mike.
481
00:24:25,198 --> 00:24:27,309
Oh, yeah, perfect fit.
482
00:24:27,333 --> 00:24:28,443
Here, let me get that for you.
483
00:24:28,467 --> 00:24:29,744
Uh, no, thank you.
484
00:24:29,768 --> 00:24:32,080
I am perfectly capable of
rolling up my own pajama sleeve.
485
00:24:32,104 --> 00:24:33,481
Thank you.
486
00:24:35,807 --> 00:24:38,653
Please let me do that for you.
487
00:24:38,677 --> 00:24:41,678
I'm not trying to take them
off, I'm just trying to roll them up.
488
00:24:44,817 --> 00:24:46,416
There. Isn't that better?
489
00:24:50,022 --> 00:24:51,867
Well, would you like
something to eat?
490
00:24:51,891 --> 00:24:54,035
I can call room service.
491
00:24:54,059 --> 00:24:56,838
No. I'm not hungry.
492
00:24:56,862 --> 00:24:59,096
Well, then, would
you like a nightcap?
493
00:25:01,734 --> 00:25:02,944
Magazine?
494
00:25:06,806 --> 00:25:08,750
Well, I guess there's
only one thing left to do.
495
00:25:08,774 --> 00:25:09,751
Let's go to bed.
496
00:25:09,775 --> 00:25:10,953
What?!
497
00:25:10,977 --> 00:25:12,554
To sleep.
498
00:25:12,578 --> 00:25:13,877
Oh.
499
00:25:14,947 --> 00:25:15,987
Of course.
500
00:25:40,439 --> 00:25:41,559
Good night, Jane.
501
00:26:02,962 --> 00:26:05,073
Mr. Waterman, I just
wanted to make sure
502
00:26:05,097 --> 00:26:07,337
you were getting
enough attention.
503
00:26:21,413 --> 00:26:24,392
Did I tell you how handsome
you look this morning?
504
00:26:24,416 --> 00:26:25,493
No.
505
00:26:25,517 --> 00:26:26,595
Well, you do.
506
00:26:26,619 --> 00:26:28,130
Very handsome.
507
00:26:28,154 --> 00:26:29,297
Actually, you did.
508
00:26:29,321 --> 00:26:30,632
But I just wanted
to hear it again.
509
00:26:30,656 --> 00:26:31,733
Ha-ha-ha.
510
00:26:31,757 --> 00:26:33,437
Ha-ha-ha.
511
00:26:35,160 --> 00:26:37,372
Don't leave me.
512
00:26:37,396 --> 00:26:41,098
Darling, if it were
only up to me.
513
00:26:48,307 --> 00:26:49,584
Hi, sexy lady.
514
00:26:49,608 --> 00:26:50,918
Hello.
515
00:26:50,942 --> 00:26:51,919
Hi, Jane.
516
00:26:51,943 --> 00:26:52,921
Hi.
517
00:26:52,945 --> 00:26:54,889
Guess where she spent the night.
518
00:26:54,913 --> 00:26:56,958
Doug? Ho-ho-ho.
519
00:26:56,982 --> 00:26:58,327
That son of a gun.
520
00:26:58,351 --> 00:27:00,529
All my training
hasn't been in vain.
521
00:27:00,553 --> 00:27:02,597
Was everything to
your satisfaction?
522
00:27:02,621 --> 00:27:03,898
Oh, yes.
523
00:27:03,922 --> 00:27:05,266
Uh, you have beautiful pajamas,
524
00:27:05,290 --> 00:27:08,269
but I think you should
have the sleeves shortened.
525
00:27:08,293 --> 00:27:10,471
I'll see the tailor after lunch.
526
00:27:10,495 --> 00:27:11,940
Come on, Melanie, I'm starving.
527
00:27:11,964 --> 00:27:13,008
We'll see you later, Jane.
528
00:27:13,032 --> 00:27:14,409
Bye, Jane. Have fun.
529
00:27:14,433 --> 00:27:16,078
Bye.
530
00:27:16,102 --> 00:27:18,342
Hey. Hello.
531
00:27:19,938 --> 00:27:21,116
Now I gotta admit,
532
00:27:21,140 --> 00:27:22,450
I like that outfit
a little better
533
00:27:22,474 --> 00:27:23,785
than the one you
had on last night.
534
00:27:23,809 --> 00:27:26,454
Of course, it
doesn't fit as well.
535
00:27:28,147 --> 00:27:31,426
By the way, where did
you go this morning?
536
00:27:31,450 --> 00:27:33,617
I wanted to thank
you for last night.
537
00:27:34,953 --> 00:27:36,431
You must be an early riser.
538
00:27:36,455 --> 00:27:38,100
Well, not really.
539
00:27:38,124 --> 00:27:40,568
I just figured you'd want
some privacy when you got up.
540
00:27:40,592 --> 00:27:42,470
You seemed a little
uncomfortable last night.
541
00:27:42,494 --> 00:27:44,705
Oh, uncomfortable? Me?
542
00:27:44,729 --> 00:27:46,975
Where did you get a
crazy idea like that?
543
00:27:46,999 --> 00:27:49,745
Oh, it's just a wild guess.
544
00:27:49,769 --> 00:27:51,679
I never saw anybody
sleep sitting up all night
545
00:27:51,703 --> 00:27:53,370
holding a sheet like this:
546
00:27:56,542 --> 00:27:57,853
How about some lunch?
547
00:27:57,877 --> 00:28:00,389
In your cabin or
the dining room?
548
00:28:00,413 --> 00:28:02,023
Let's try the dining room.
549
00:28:02,047 --> 00:28:04,287
I don't think you could
eat much through a sheet.
550
00:28:07,086 --> 00:28:09,097
How could we ever suspect a guy
551
00:28:09,121 --> 00:28:11,900
who wrote Marvin the
Worm Bakes a Pie?
552
00:28:11,924 --> 00:28:14,236
Well, it's gotta be somebody.
553
00:28:14,260 --> 00:28:16,371
Hey, you guys, guess who made
554
00:28:16,395 --> 00:28:18,573
three ship-to-shore
phone calls yesterday.
555
00:28:18,597 --> 00:28:20,542
Marvin the radio operator?
556
00:28:22,201 --> 00:28:25,013
No, Mrs. Corwin.
557
00:28:25,037 --> 00:28:26,415
No.
558
00:28:26,439 --> 00:28:28,617
We already eliminated her.
559
00:28:28,641 --> 00:28:31,486
Isaac, you make the
best coffee I ever tasted.
560
00:28:31,510 --> 00:28:33,154
Oh, thank you.
561
00:28:33,178 --> 00:28:34,989
The sweet rolls are delicious.
562
00:28:35,013 --> 00:28:36,257
Mm.
563
00:28:36,281 --> 00:28:38,614
I'm gonna mention
this in my next report.
564
00:28:45,824 --> 00:28:48,503
Now, wasn't that a
wonderful elevator ride?
565
00:28:48,527 --> 00:28:51,239
Uh, look, I'm just gonna
buy a couple of postcards.
566
00:28:51,263 --> 00:28:53,174
I mean, I really don't
need all this attention.
567
00:28:53,198 --> 00:28:54,710
Oh, well, that's
what we're here for.
568
00:28:54,734 --> 00:28:56,077
We'll help you pick 'em out.
569
00:28:56,101 --> 00:28:58,379
We're just treating you like
we do every other passenger.
570
00:28:58,403 --> 00:29:00,682
Oh, you've been
much too kind already.
571
00:29:00,706 --> 00:29:02,617
Oh, uh, by the way,
thanks for the copy
572
00:29:02,641 --> 00:29:04,185
of Marvin the Flea
Goes to Harvard.
573
00:29:04,209 --> 00:29:05,620
Oh.
574
00:29:05,644 --> 00:29:07,122
Now, let's see...
575
00:29:07,146 --> 00:29:09,257
I needed to buy two postcards.
576
00:29:09,281 --> 00:29:10,759
And there was one
more thing I needed
577
00:29:10,783 --> 00:29:13,194
before we get into Ensenada.
578
00:29:17,322 --> 00:29:21,236
That's it. A Spanish dictionary.
579
00:29:21,260 --> 00:29:23,100
I can get it for you!
580
00:29:25,363 --> 00:29:26,763
Hi. BOTH: Hi.
581
00:29:28,100 --> 00:29:30,678
I, uh, stopped by yesterday,
had it made up special.
582
00:29:30,702 --> 00:29:32,113
What is it?
583
00:29:32,137 --> 00:29:34,082
You'll see. Close your eyes.
584
00:29:34,106 --> 00:29:36,186
You didn't have to do that.
585
00:29:37,209 --> 00:29:40,210
I know, but I wanted to.
586
00:29:41,947 --> 00:29:43,158
Okay.
587
00:29:43,182 --> 00:29:45,160
I always wanted to
buy you a diamond.
588
00:29:45,184 --> 00:29:46,161
You're crazy.
589
00:29:46,185 --> 00:29:48,163
I was gonna have
it mounted in a ring.
590
00:29:49,488 --> 00:29:52,189
Oh, the ace of diamonds
from my king of hearts.
591
00:29:54,226 --> 00:29:56,404
You know, I've been thinking.
592
00:29:56,428 --> 00:29:58,573
After the cruise I'd like to
go back to New York with you.
593
00:29:58,597 --> 00:30:01,342
Sarah, we've been
all through this.
594
00:30:01,366 --> 00:30:03,333
Please, I want to. No.
595
00:30:04,503 --> 00:30:08,504
Darling, we have an agreement.
596
00:30:17,416 --> 00:30:19,994
Isaac, another fog
cutter for Mrs. Corwin.
597
00:30:20,018 --> 00:30:21,229
Oh, no, captain.
598
00:30:21,253 --> 00:30:22,564
One more of those
599
00:30:22,588 --> 00:30:24,432
and I won't be able to
steer the ship straight.
600
00:30:27,593 --> 00:30:28,670
Oh, no, no.
601
00:30:28,694 --> 00:30:30,337
You're the one
who steers the ship,
602
00:30:30,361 --> 00:30:32,040
I'm the passenger.
603
00:30:32,064 --> 00:30:33,207
Oh, what the hey?
604
00:30:33,231 --> 00:30:35,443
Isaac, one more frog cutter.
605
00:30:35,467 --> 00:30:36,944
Uh, fog cutter.
606
00:30:36,968 --> 00:30:39,080
Not you, you're driving.
607
00:30:47,479 --> 00:30:49,090
You know, it's sure nice of Doug
608
00:30:49,114 --> 00:30:51,292
to keep Jane occupied
this way, isn't it?
609
00:30:51,316 --> 00:30:53,995
Yeah, he's going way
beyond the call of duty.
610
00:30:54,019 --> 00:30:55,752
Heck of a good buddy.
611
00:31:01,594 --> 00:31:03,271
Fine cognac.
612
00:31:03,295 --> 00:31:06,129
A perfect ending
to a perfect meal.
613
00:31:07,666 --> 00:31:11,445
Do you remember the first time
you ever took me out for dinner?
614
00:31:11,469 --> 00:31:14,415
I mean, you know,
just the two of us alone?
615
00:31:14,439 --> 00:31:15,917
Of course.
616
00:31:15,941 --> 00:31:17,051
La Grenouille.
617
00:31:17,075 --> 00:31:18,319
Hm.
618
00:31:18,343 --> 00:31:21,089
In fact, I still remember
what you were wearing.
619
00:31:21,113 --> 00:31:22,323
No, you don't.
620
00:31:22,347 --> 00:31:23,925
Yes, I do.
621
00:31:23,949 --> 00:31:26,594
You... You had on
a pale blue dress,
622
00:31:26,618 --> 00:31:29,197
with, uh, lace
around the neckline
623
00:31:29,221 --> 00:31:31,299
and long sleeves.
624
00:31:31,323 --> 00:31:32,566
You're incredible.
625
00:31:34,026 --> 00:31:35,537
You know what I remember?
626
00:31:35,561 --> 00:31:36,738
What?
627
00:31:36,762 --> 00:31:39,374
I remember how impressed I was
628
00:31:39,398 --> 00:31:41,476
that the maitre d'
greeted you so personally
629
00:31:41,500 --> 00:31:43,011
and shook your hand.
630
00:31:43,035 --> 00:31:46,681
Oh, that's just because he
knew there was a $20 bill in it.
631
00:31:46,705 --> 00:31:50,485
And then when we
left, I remember thinking,
632
00:31:50,509 --> 00:31:53,610
"Gee, I hope I'm the only
girl he ever brings here."
633
00:31:55,814 --> 00:31:59,894
Then later, I remember you
carried me into the bedroom.
634
00:32:02,587 --> 00:32:07,601
Uh, I think that fellow at
the next table is listening.
635
00:32:07,625 --> 00:32:09,771
He just drank his candle.
636
00:32:19,170 --> 00:32:21,616
Another fog cutter, Mrs. Corwin?
637
00:32:21,640 --> 00:32:24,019
Oh, no, thank you.
638
00:32:24,043 --> 00:32:26,943
I'll be in no condition
to call in my report.
639
00:32:28,047 --> 00:32:29,490
Uh, I understand.
640
00:32:29,514 --> 00:32:31,414
Uh, business before pleasure.
641
00:32:32,117 --> 00:32:33,294
What business?
642
00:32:33,318 --> 00:32:35,497
My daughter paid for my trip.
643
00:32:35,521 --> 00:32:37,065
She makes me
call her twice a day
644
00:32:37,089 --> 00:32:39,009
to tell her
everything I'm doing.
645
00:32:41,160 --> 00:32:42,325
Your daughter?
646
00:32:43,595 --> 00:32:45,339
Or maybe it's my niece.
647
00:32:45,363 --> 00:32:46,996
They look so much alike.
648
00:32:50,169 --> 00:32:51,746
It's been lovely.
649
00:32:51,770 --> 00:32:53,214
Thank you.
650
00:32:56,341 --> 00:32:57,885
Why, certainly.
651
00:32:57,909 --> 00:32:59,776
I was just leaving.
652
00:33:07,086 --> 00:33:08,663
I really had fun today, Jane.
653
00:33:08,687 --> 00:33:10,220
Yeah, me too.
654
00:33:11,556 --> 00:33:13,001
Pick you up for breakfast?
655
00:33:13,025 --> 00:33:14,169
Eight o'clock okay?
656
00:33:14,193 --> 00:33:16,003
Okay.
657
00:33:16,027 --> 00:33:17,238
Well, good night.
658
00:33:17,262 --> 00:33:18,540
Good night.
659
00:33:39,384 --> 00:33:42,063
Well, looks like
your favorite couple's
660
00:33:42,087 --> 00:33:43,531
gonna close the joint.
661
00:33:43,555 --> 00:33:45,166
Yeah, aren't they terrific?
662
00:33:45,190 --> 00:33:47,735
They're never out
of each other's sight.
663
00:33:47,759 --> 00:33:50,538
You know, I've seen a lot
of couples come and go,
664
00:33:50,562 --> 00:33:52,873
but those two
have a relationship
665
00:33:52,897 --> 00:33:54,909
that's real special.
666
00:33:54,933 --> 00:33:55,999
Yeah.
667
00:34:01,372 --> 00:34:02,717
Well, good night, everybody.
668
00:34:02,741 --> 00:34:05,186
Well, good night, Isaac.
669
00:34:05,210 --> 00:34:06,186
Night, Doc.
670
00:34:06,210 --> 00:34:07,188
See you in the morning.
671
00:34:07,212 --> 00:34:08,578
Good night, Julie.
672
00:34:11,383 --> 00:34:13,060
Just one more, please.
673
00:34:13,084 --> 00:34:14,795
Do you know "You And I"?
674
00:34:14,819 --> 00:34:16,264
Would you play that, please?
675
00:34:16,288 --> 00:34:17,288
Thanks.
676
00:34:28,300 --> 00:34:31,446
♪ You and I ♪
677
00:34:31,470 --> 00:34:35,883
♪ Know the reason why ♪
678
00:34:35,907 --> 00:34:41,645
♪ A summer sky is blue ♪
679
00:34:42,848 --> 00:34:47,362
♪ And we know why ♪
680
00:34:47,386 --> 00:34:51,165
♪ Birds in the trees ♪
681
00:34:51,189 --> 00:34:57,472
♪ Sing melodies too ♪
682
00:34:57,496 --> 00:35:01,141
♪ And our love will grow ♪
683
00:35:01,165 --> 00:35:05,680
♪ From the first "hello" ♪
684
00:35:05,704 --> 00:35:11,185
♪ Until the last "goodbye" ♪
685
00:35:12,477 --> 00:35:13,677
Sarah!
686
00:35:14,680 --> 00:35:15,680
Sarah.
687
00:35:19,017 --> 00:35:20,194
Are you all right?
688
00:35:30,696 --> 00:35:33,141
Tonight Mike invited
Melanie to my cabin.
689
00:35:33,165 --> 00:35:34,842
Ah, well, don't
just stand there.
690
00:35:34,866 --> 00:35:36,065
Come on in.
691
00:35:40,138 --> 00:35:41,883
Listen, if you're
uncomfortable about this,
692
00:35:41,907 --> 00:35:43,918
just tell me and I'll find
someplace else to go.
693
00:35:43,942 --> 00:35:46,921
Oh, no, no, no. I'm
not uncomfortable.
694
00:35:46,945 --> 00:35:48,423
I'm just worried
about one thing.
695
00:35:48,447 --> 00:35:49,757
What's that?
696
00:35:49,781 --> 00:35:51,914
How are you gonna look
in Melanie's pajamas?
697
00:35:53,552 --> 00:35:55,396
Uh, would you like
something to eat?
698
00:35:55,420 --> 00:35:56,664
I can call room service.
699
00:35:56,688 --> 00:35:57,965
No, thanks, I'm not hungry.
700
00:35:57,989 --> 00:35:59,367
Mm.
701
00:35:59,391 --> 00:36:00,431
How about a nightcap?
702
00:36:03,795 --> 00:36:06,040
Magazine?
703
00:36:06,064 --> 00:36:07,341
Oh, well,
704
00:36:07,365 --> 00:36:09,510
guess there's only one
thing left for us to do.
705
00:36:09,534 --> 00:36:11,145
Let's go to bed.
706
00:36:30,522 --> 00:36:33,456
I'm sorry for that display.
707
00:36:35,426 --> 00:36:36,559
I know.
708
00:36:40,498 --> 00:36:42,131
Sarah...
709
00:36:44,369 --> 00:36:46,770
this isn't easy
for either of us.
710
00:36:49,474 --> 00:36:52,586
What am I gonna do without you?
711
00:36:52,610 --> 00:36:55,322
What am I gonna do?
712
00:37:11,897 --> 00:37:14,809
I'm gonna go and get
us some coffee, okay?
713
00:37:14,833 --> 00:37:16,866
I'll be right back.
You better be.
714
00:37:22,741 --> 00:37:24,218
Hey, buddy, I haven't
seen you around.
715
00:37:24,242 --> 00:37:25,385
Where you been?
716
00:37:25,409 --> 00:37:27,222
Well, Jane and I have
been keeping pretty busy.
717
00:37:27,246 --> 00:37:28,790
Yeah, I'll bet.
718
00:37:28,814 --> 00:37:30,157
Hey, I gotta tell
you, old buddy,
719
00:37:30,181 --> 00:37:32,593
you have really been a heck
of a good sport about this.
720
00:37:32,617 --> 00:37:33,895
And I won't forget it, either.
721
00:37:33,919 --> 00:37:34,895
What do you mean?
722
00:37:34,919 --> 00:37:36,464
You know, keeping
Jane out of our hair
723
00:37:36,488 --> 00:37:37,865
the way you've been doing.
724
00:37:37,889 --> 00:37:40,134
Asking her out for a drink
the other night was terrific.
725
00:37:40,158 --> 00:37:41,169
But keeping her busy
726
00:37:41,193 --> 00:37:42,970
so Mike and I could
be alone together,
727
00:37:42,994 --> 00:37:45,072
that's even better.
728
00:37:45,096 --> 00:37:46,974
Here's your coffee.
729
00:37:55,740 --> 00:37:57,251
Jane!
730
00:37:57,275 --> 00:37:58,474
Goodbye.
731
00:38:02,514 --> 00:38:03,524
Oh, good morning.
732
00:38:03,548 --> 00:38:04,525
Morning.
733
00:38:04,549 --> 00:38:05,859
Where's Mr. Sherwood?
734
00:38:05,883 --> 00:38:08,129
This is the first time I've
ever seen you two apart.
735
00:38:08,153 --> 00:38:10,131
Well, uh, he had a
very restless night,
736
00:38:10,155 --> 00:38:12,400
so I'm letting him sleep late.
737
00:38:12,424 --> 00:38:14,035
I didn't want to wake him.
738
00:38:14,059 --> 00:38:16,371
Oh, I wish somebody'd
do that for me.
739
00:38:16,395 --> 00:38:18,194
Heh. Bye-bye. Bye-bye.
740
00:38:20,065 --> 00:38:22,743
How about...
741
00:38:22,767 --> 00:38:27,681
Marvin the Mole Meets
Starsky and Hutch?
742
00:38:27,705 --> 00:38:29,584
Uh, no, it won't work.
743
00:38:29,608 --> 00:38:32,442
Marvin the Mole
only works alone.
744
00:38:37,048 --> 00:38:38,592
Isn't that wonderful?
745
00:38:38,616 --> 00:38:41,951
They've translated your
books into every language.
746
00:38:44,589 --> 00:38:47,200
Well, we know the
inspector is not Mrs. Corwin
747
00:38:47,224 --> 00:38:48,369
or Mr. Waterman.
748
00:38:48,393 --> 00:38:49,803
That narrows it down.
749
00:38:49,827 --> 00:38:52,307
Yeah, uh, how many
passengers does that leave?
750
00:38:52,331 --> 00:38:54,697
Five hundred and ninety-eight.
751
00:38:55,666 --> 00:38:56,999
This is not going to be easy.
752
00:38:58,770 --> 00:39:01,482
Well, what are we gonna do?
753
00:39:01,506 --> 00:39:03,250
Well, we make
sure that everybody
754
00:39:03,274 --> 00:39:06,321
gets special treatment
before we hit L.A.
755
00:39:06,345 --> 00:39:08,055
Right.
756
00:39:08,079 --> 00:39:09,957
Well, let's get to it.
757
00:39:15,487 --> 00:39:16,619
Jane?
758
00:39:17,655 --> 00:39:19,500
Jane?
759
00:39:19,524 --> 00:39:20,868
Open up.
760
00:39:20,892 --> 00:39:22,992
I'm going to stay
here until you do.
761
00:39:25,530 --> 00:39:27,875
I know hearing what
they said must've hurt,
762
00:39:27,899 --> 00:39:30,911
but what you don't know is
what I was going to say to them.
763
00:39:30,935 --> 00:39:32,935
That they did me a favor.
764
00:39:36,675 --> 00:39:39,687
You're different from
any girl I've ever met.
765
00:39:39,711 --> 00:39:43,858
You're quiet and
sensitive and real.
766
00:39:43,882 --> 00:39:46,326
You don't have to worry
that you're not like Melanie.
767
00:39:46,350 --> 00:39:47,928
You're you.
768
00:39:47,952 --> 00:39:49,486
You're special.
769
00:39:51,590 --> 00:39:55,135
Well, anyway, I just
want you to know...
770
00:39:55,159 --> 00:39:57,004
I love you.
771
00:39:57,028 --> 00:39:59,496
Well, why didn't you
say so in the first place?
772
00:40:08,039 --> 00:40:11,252
Well, I'm glad to see
you two finally made up.
773
00:40:11,276 --> 00:40:14,088
Would you mind if
we use the cabin?
774
00:40:14,112 --> 00:40:15,911
Yes, we would.
775
00:40:27,058 --> 00:40:28,769
Let's go, sleepyhead, wake up.
776
00:40:28,793 --> 00:40:30,673
We've got a lot
of packing to do.
777
00:40:31,196 --> 00:40:32,595
Mrs. Lambert?
778
00:40:34,199 --> 00:40:35,609
Yes?
779
00:40:35,633 --> 00:40:39,380
May we have a word with
you in your cabin, please?
780
00:40:39,404 --> 00:40:41,548
What is it?
781
00:40:41,572 --> 00:40:42,906
Please.
782
00:40:55,019 --> 00:40:57,287
What is it? Tell me, please.
783
00:41:02,527 --> 00:41:04,572
Mr. Sherwood.
784
00:41:04,596 --> 00:41:10,044
A few hours ago...
He isn't... No, no.
785
00:41:10,068 --> 00:41:12,179
He's still alive.
786
00:41:12,203 --> 00:41:13,814
But he's in great pain.
787
00:41:13,838 --> 00:41:16,684
That's why I thought it best
that we take him to a hospital
788
00:41:16,708 --> 00:41:18,219
as quickly as possible.
789
00:41:18,243 --> 00:41:22,456
I had a launch take him to
Los Angeles about an hour ago.
790
00:41:22,480 --> 00:41:25,292
He asked me not to tell you.
791
00:41:25,316 --> 00:41:29,184
But, uh, he wanted
me to give you this.
792
00:41:31,222 --> 00:41:33,389
Oh, please, will...
Will you read it?
793
00:41:43,401 --> 00:41:47,948
"My dearest, darling Sarah,
794
00:41:47,972 --> 00:41:52,920
"the end is coming sooner
than the doctors foresaw,
795
00:41:52,944 --> 00:41:55,222
"and as we agreed,
796
00:41:55,246 --> 00:41:59,159
"I want to see this
thing through alone.
797
00:41:59,183 --> 00:42:01,796
"The short time I have left
798
00:42:01,820 --> 00:42:04,431
"would only be
torture for us both.
799
00:42:04,455 --> 00:42:10,003
"So I have left you
while joy was still with us,
800
00:42:10,027 --> 00:42:12,339
"as it has been from the moment
801
00:42:12,363 --> 00:42:14,830
"I first saw your
beautiful face.
802
00:42:18,937 --> 00:42:24,151
"Do not fret, my darling, Sarah.
803
00:42:24,175 --> 00:42:26,275
"Only my life is ending.
804
00:42:28,680 --> 00:42:35,084
"My undying love
for you will live on.
805
00:42:38,389 --> 00:42:43,459
"Your devoted... father."
806
00:42:45,564 --> 00:42:48,342
Um, where is he?
807
00:42:48,366 --> 00:42:49,932
What hospital?
808
00:42:55,840 --> 00:42:58,574
He asked me not to say.
809
00:42:59,411 --> 00:43:00,754
Uh, look.
810
00:43:00,778 --> 00:43:02,389
My father and I had a bargain
811
00:43:02,413 --> 00:43:04,825
that he... He wanted
to do this his way.
812
00:43:04,849 --> 00:43:08,229
But now I... Please,
tell me where he is.
813
00:43:08,253 --> 00:43:11,932
Dr. Bricker is in a
sensitive position.
814
00:43:11,956 --> 00:43:17,092
He has a doctor-patient
trust to uphold.
815
00:43:18,596 --> 00:43:19,606
Please.
816
00:43:19,630 --> 00:43:20,796
He needs me.
817
00:43:22,934 --> 00:43:25,167
Even if it's just
to hold his hand.
818
00:43:26,738 --> 00:43:28,416
And say "goodbye."
819
00:43:28,440 --> 00:43:29,772
Please.
820
00:43:34,212 --> 00:43:35,212
Adam?
821
00:43:37,148 --> 00:43:38,647
I'm not a doctor.
822
00:43:47,625 --> 00:43:50,493
He's at Cedars-Sinai
in Los Angeles.
823
00:43:52,297 --> 00:43:55,276
We'll be docking
in about an hour.
824
00:43:55,300 --> 00:43:56,932
I'll get you there.
825
00:44:13,250 --> 00:44:16,163
That inspector is
driving us all crazy.
826
00:44:21,826 --> 00:44:24,205
I think I just broke
the world's record
827
00:44:24,229 --> 00:44:27,930
for consecutive Ping-Pong
games while playing shuffleboard.
828
00:44:28,900 --> 00:44:30,544
I'm exhausted.
829
00:44:30,568 --> 00:44:31,878
You?
830
00:44:31,902 --> 00:44:35,081
I'm gonna put a
sign over my bar.
831
00:44:35,105 --> 00:44:38,719
"Over One Million Served."
832
00:44:50,287 --> 00:44:51,599
Hi.
833
00:44:51,623 --> 00:44:53,033
Can I help you?
834
00:44:53,057 --> 00:44:55,591
You're the only two I
haven't done anything for.
835
00:45:06,837 --> 00:45:08,815
Is that the way
you lounge around
836
00:45:08,839 --> 00:45:11,240
when there's an
inspector onboard?
837
00:45:28,626 --> 00:45:31,572
Marvin the Author Falls in Love.
838
00:45:32,630 --> 00:45:34,842
How about that,
Mrs. Corwin? Mmm?
839
00:45:34,866 --> 00:45:37,043
Wait'll my daughter
gets this report.
840
00:45:39,404 --> 00:45:40,903
Oh, dear.
841
00:45:50,281 --> 00:45:51,659
It's been great, Melanie.
842
00:45:51,683 --> 00:45:53,360
You're a beautiful, sexy lady.
843
00:45:53,384 --> 00:45:55,818
And you're a
beautiful, sexy man.
844
00:46:00,024 --> 00:46:01,924
Well, we'll see you
sometime, okay?
845
00:46:03,194 --> 00:46:04,960
Uh... When?
846
00:46:06,431 --> 00:46:08,363
You know, sometime.
847
00:46:09,634 --> 00:46:10,634
Bye.
848
00:46:23,114 --> 00:46:24,524
I'll go get us all a cab, okay?
849
00:46:24,548 --> 00:46:26,148
Okay, don't be too long.
850
00:46:31,622 --> 00:46:34,134
Ah. Well, what can I
say? We're an item.
851
00:46:34,158 --> 00:46:37,404
Well, maybe you can ask
him to fix me up with a friend.
852
00:46:37,428 --> 00:46:38,727
Mm.
853
00:46:39,798 --> 00:46:40,975
Come back again.
854
00:46:40,999 --> 00:46:41,976
Bye.
855
00:46:42,000 --> 00:46:43,811
Bye!
856
00:46:43,835 --> 00:46:46,080
Bye. Bye.
857
00:46:46,104 --> 00:46:48,548
Bye.
858
00:46:48,572 --> 00:46:51,085
We've arranged for a car
to take you to the hospital.
859
00:46:51,109 --> 00:46:52,453
Thank you both for everything.
860
00:46:52,477 --> 00:46:54,421
I'm very sorry, Mrs. Lambert.
861
00:46:54,445 --> 00:46:55,656
Don't be.
862
00:46:55,680 --> 00:46:58,025
My father and I had as
near perfect a relationship
863
00:46:58,049 --> 00:46:59,715
as God will allow.
864
00:47:02,453 --> 00:47:03,453
Bye.
865
00:47:07,158 --> 00:47:08,635
My God.
866
00:47:08,659 --> 00:47:11,504
He was her father and I thought
there was something going on.
867
00:47:11,528 --> 00:47:14,441
Why is it that we always
think the worst of people
868
00:47:14,465 --> 00:47:16,298
instead of the best?
869
00:47:33,751 --> 00:47:34,895
Mrs. Corwin was so nice...
870
00:47:34,919 --> 00:47:36,763
I must see someone
in charge immediately!
871
00:47:36,787 --> 00:47:39,366
Oh, well, sir, you're in
luck. Here's the captain.
872
00:47:39,390 --> 00:47:41,602
Oh, I am the company
inspector for the Princess Lines.
873
00:47:41,626 --> 00:47:43,703
You're the inspector? Mm-hm.
874
00:47:43,727 --> 00:47:46,273
I don't remember
seeing you on this cruise.
875
00:47:46,297 --> 00:47:48,041
Well, that's what I
was trying to say.
876
00:47:48,065 --> 00:47:50,043
My father drove me to
the dock and disappeared.
877
00:47:50,067 --> 00:47:52,145
And while I was rushing
around, trying to find him,
878
00:47:52,169 --> 00:47:53,647
the ship sailed without me.
879
00:47:53,671 --> 00:47:57,985
You had seven days... Papa!
880
00:47:59,644 --> 00:48:01,288
Excuse me, excuse me.
881
00:48:01,312 --> 00:48:03,256
That phrase that
your father just used.
882
00:48:05,783 --> 00:48:07,427
What does that mean?
883
00:48:07,451 --> 00:48:09,462
Uh, it means, uh...
884
00:48:09,486 --> 00:48:12,454
"Have you seen my
son, the inspector?"
885
00:48:13,791 --> 00:48:15,691
Oh!
60998
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