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- Previously on Young Sheldon...
- We are at capacity.
2
00:00:04,510 --> 00:00:06,047
It's time to expand.
3
00:00:06,147 --> 00:00:09,653
- Where?
- The video store right behind that wall
4
00:00:09,753 --> 00:00:11,590
just lost its lease.
5
00:00:11,690 --> 00:00:14,263
So, you're telling me there's
nothing weird going on back there?
6
00:00:15,899 --> 00:00:17,202
Oh, my God.
7
00:00:17,302 --> 00:00:18,991
Is it legal?
8
00:00:18,992 --> 00:00:19,993
- No.
- Yes.
9
00:00:19,994 --> 00:00:21,044
Too bad there's not
a comic book database
10
00:00:21,144 --> 00:00:23,081
so I can search through it
and find what I'm looking for.
11
00:00:23,181 --> 00:00:24,750
Well, CERN has something similar.
12
00:00:24,850 --> 00:00:27,222
You can search a database
of scientific papers.
13
00:00:27,402 --> 00:00:29,306
But there's no database for comic books.
14
00:00:29,406 --> 00:00:31,577
You should make one. Somewhere else.
15
00:00:31,677 --> 00:00:34,650
Could it be used to
catalogue other things?
16
00:00:34,750 --> 00:00:36,520
Yes, the applications are endless.
17
00:00:36,620 --> 00:00:38,758
Ooh, there could be ones
for scientific grants.
18
00:00:38,858 --> 00:00:40,895
Funding grants is such
a time-consuming process.
19
00:00:40,995 --> 00:00:42,532
If there was a centralized database,
20
00:00:42,632 --> 00:00:44,302
it would change the
research landscape entirely.
21
00:00:44,403 --> 00:00:46,640
Do you see what this could do
for the scientific community?
22
00:00:46,740 --> 00:00:49,445
We could charge an access fee to
every university on the planet,
23
00:00:49,546 --> 00:00:51,950
then I could retire on
a yacht in the Bahamas.
24
00:00:52,051 --> 00:00:53,052
You're missing the point.
25
00:00:53,053 --> 00:00:54,189
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
26
00:00:54,289 --> 00:00:55,792
Uh, good for science. I love it.
27
00:00:58,664 --> 00:01:01,268
ADULT SHELDON: People say
French is the language of love,
28
00:01:01,468 --> 00:01:03,449
but for me, nothing is sweeter
29
00:01:03,450 --> 00:01:06,249
than the exhilarating
sounds of legalese.
30
00:01:06,250 --> 00:01:07,381
Ooh, la, la.
31
00:01:07,391 --> 00:01:10,331
The same could not be
said for my parents.
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00:01:10,431 --> 00:01:11,432
Uh...
33
00:01:11,466 --> 00:01:12,467
(stammers)
34
00:01:12,535 --> 00:01:13,537
And which one are we?
35
00:01:13,637 --> 00:01:14,672
"The-the party of the first part"
36
00:01:14,772 --> 00:01:16,108
or "the party of the second part"?
37
00:01:16,209 --> 00:01:17,678
(laughs) The first part,
38
00:01:17,778 --> 00:01:19,515
but either way, it's a party.
39
00:01:19,615 --> 00:01:22,120
Speaking of which, can I get you a beer?
40
00:01:22,221 --> 00:01:24,392
Y-You're a Lone Star man, right?
41
00:01:24,492 --> 00:01:25,994
- Matter of fact, I am.
- George.
42
00:01:26,095 --> 00:01:27,465
She offered. I don't want to be rude.
43
00:01:27,565 --> 00:01:28,566
It's 11:00 a.m.
44
00:01:28,600 --> 00:01:30,504
Well, you just let me know.
45
00:01:30,604 --> 00:01:32,073
We'll get you anything you want.
46
00:01:32,173 --> 00:01:34,210
We're fine, thank you. (clears throat)
47
00:01:34,312 --> 00:01:36,283
So, you really think this
invention of Sheldon's
48
00:01:36,383 --> 00:01:37,585
could be worth something?
49
00:01:37,685 --> 00:01:39,489
Oh, who knows? Uh, most of the time,
50
00:01:39,589 --> 00:01:41,124
these things don't pan out.
51
00:01:41,224 --> 00:01:43,730
Could be something,
probably nothing. (laughs)
52
00:01:43,830 --> 00:01:46,268
Uh, that's just a formality.
53
00:01:47,069 --> 00:01:48,607
But you said my grant database
54
00:01:48,707 --> 00:01:50,577
would make the university
"boatloads of money."
55
00:01:50,677 --> 00:01:52,581
Well, that doesn't mean anything.
56
00:01:52,681 --> 00:01:54,318
Boats can be small. (laughs)
57
00:01:54,418 --> 00:01:55,787
Ever hear of a canoe?
58
00:01:55,887 --> 00:01:58,326
Anyway, who needs a pen?
59
00:01:58,426 --> 00:01:59,895
What's this about the university
60
00:01:59,995 --> 00:02:03,268
owning 90% and Sheldon only owning ten?
61
00:02:03,369 --> 00:02:05,172
Oh, that's just standard boilerplate.
62
00:02:05,272 --> 00:02:06,809
Did you know that boilerplate originally
63
00:02:06,909 --> 00:02:08,078
referred to the roll of steel
64
00:02:08,178 --> 00:02:10,182
used as a template to
create steam boilers,
65
00:02:10,282 --> 00:02:12,053
but then was adapted
to the legal profession
66
00:02:12,153 --> 00:02:13,789
to describe the way
companies use fine print
67
00:02:13,890 --> 00:02:15,225
to get around the law?
68
00:02:16,628 --> 00:02:18,766
Ugh, that fact is just so fun.
69
00:02:18,866 --> 00:02:20,403
You see? It is a party.
70
00:02:20,503 --> 00:02:22,774
And what's a party without Yoo-hoo?
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00:02:22,874 --> 00:02:24,711
Can I get you a cold one?
72
00:02:24,811 --> 00:02:26,046
Yes, please.
73
00:02:26,147 --> 00:02:29,187
No. We want to make sure that
Sheldon is being treated fairly.
74
00:02:29,367 --> 00:02:31,271
Yeah, maybe we should get our own lawyer
75
00:02:31,371 --> 00:02:33,442
to take a look at this
before we sign anything.
76
00:02:33,542 --> 00:02:34,944
Can we afford a lawyer?
77
00:02:37,383 --> 00:02:40,154
Okay, w-we're gonna need
some time to get back to you.
78
00:02:40,254 --> 00:02:43,060
Of course. You take
all the time you need.
79
00:02:43,160 --> 00:02:44,764
You know, just because of all
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00:02:44,864 --> 00:02:48,037
the nice things we've done for
your son and for your family,
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00:02:48,137 --> 00:02:51,210
no need to start trusting us now.
82
00:02:51,310 --> 00:02:54,918
She took that better than I thought.
83
00:02:55,018 --> 00:02:57,924
♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪
84
00:02:58,024 --> 00:03:00,562
♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪
85
00:03:00,662 --> 00:03:02,934
♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪
86
00:03:03,034 --> 00:03:06,006
♪ I am a mighty little man ♪
87
00:03:06,106 --> 00:03:10,181
♪ I am a mighty little man. ♪
88
00:03:16,060 --> 00:03:17,763
Dang, it's busy in here for a weekday.
89
00:03:17,863 --> 00:03:19,833
Social Security checks landed.
90
00:03:19,933 --> 00:03:22,573
Hm. Getting paid just to
be old... must be nice.
91
00:03:22,673 --> 00:03:23,741
I ain't complaining.
92
00:03:23,841 --> 00:03:26,547
Listen, this cash box is
full. Take some of this up
93
00:03:26,647 --> 00:03:29,252
and stick it in the
register in the video store.
94
00:03:29,352 --> 00:03:30,353
You got it.
95
00:03:30,388 --> 00:03:31,724
And don't be flirting with Mandy.
96
00:03:31,824 --> 00:03:32,993
I need help back here.
97
00:03:33,093 --> 00:03:34,863
Okay, but she might flirt with me.
98
00:03:34,963 --> 00:03:37,234
This shirt really brings out my eyes.
99
00:03:39,472 --> 00:03:40,775
(door closes)
100
00:03:40,875 --> 00:03:42,445
How's it going? Figure everything out?
101
00:03:42,545 --> 00:03:44,750
People give me money,
I give them movies.
102
00:03:44,850 --> 00:03:46,085
I think I got it.
103
00:03:46,185 --> 00:03:48,089
Smart, pregnant, you're
the whole package.
104
00:03:48,189 --> 00:03:50,060
I'd like to return this movie.
105
00:03:50,160 --> 00:03:52,064
Okay, thank you. Come again.
106
00:03:52,666 --> 00:03:54,435
I can't believe you
would rent this filth.
107
00:03:54,535 --> 00:03:57,207
It's not filth. It's Basic Instinct.
108
00:03:57,307 --> 00:03:58,778
Well, my husband was watching it
109
00:03:58,878 --> 00:04:00,915
and there was a woman in
there who showed her hoo-ha.
110
00:04:01,015 --> 00:04:02,384
Yeah, she does.
111
00:04:02,484 --> 00:04:04,055
Come on, I mean, you
don't see the whole thing.
112
00:04:04,155 --> 00:04:05,959
At most, you see a "hoo."
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00:04:06,059 --> 00:04:08,363
If you see the "hoo,"
the "ha's" right there.
114
00:04:09,031 --> 00:04:10,634
Whatever it was, it's sinful.
115
00:04:10,734 --> 00:04:12,772
Why don't you pick out
something else? On the house.
116
00:04:12,872 --> 00:04:15,077
I don't know why you'd
carry something like this.
117
00:04:15,177 --> 00:04:16,212
People like it.
118
00:04:16,312 --> 00:04:17,514
I've seen it three times.
119
00:04:17,614 --> 00:04:19,351
Do you really want to bring your baby
120
00:04:19,451 --> 00:04:22,424
into a world where this is
considered entertainment?
121
00:04:24,328 --> 00:04:26,565
Lady, why don't you let
me worry about my baby
122
00:04:26,666 --> 00:04:29,004
and, uh, you worry about
what your husband's watching.
123
00:04:29,605 --> 00:04:31,743
Easy, she's still a customer.
124
00:04:31,843 --> 00:04:33,012
Not anymore.
125
00:04:33,112 --> 00:04:34,448
And I'm gonna tell my prayer group
126
00:04:34,548 --> 00:04:35,718
not to come here either.
127
00:04:35,818 --> 00:04:37,182
(scoffs) Okay, you do that.
128
00:04:37,183 --> 00:04:39,224
We have family entertainment as well.
129
00:04:39,325 --> 00:04:41,495
Sound of Music. No one shows nothing.
130
00:04:41,595 --> 00:04:43,900
Three times, really?
131
00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:45,470
I'm 17.
132
00:04:47,507 --> 00:04:48,744
Well, I don't know, you're the lawyer.
133
00:04:48,844 --> 00:04:50,881
You know, if this invention's big,
134
00:04:50,981 --> 00:04:52,216
mama wants a taste.
135
00:04:52,316 --> 00:04:53,954
President Hagemeyer, a word.
136
00:04:54,054 --> 00:04:55,791
Here's a word: out.
137
00:04:55,891 --> 00:04:57,160
I understand you're moving forward
138
00:04:57,260 --> 00:04:58,830
with Sheldon's grant database.
139
00:04:58,930 --> 00:05:00,299
I was an intrinsic part of that.
140
00:05:00,399 --> 00:05:02,203
Hm, Sheldon didn't mention you.
141
00:05:02,303 --> 00:05:05,042
Of course he didn't, that
pint-sized little credit hog.
142
00:05:05,142 --> 00:05:07,046
Do I need to redo these contracts?
143
00:05:07,146 --> 00:05:09,317
- You betcha.
- All right, just hold on.
144
00:05:09,417 --> 00:05:10,686
This is good for the university.
145
00:05:10,787 --> 00:05:12,290
This isn't about everybody
146
00:05:12,390 --> 00:05:13,960
getting a piece of the pie.
147
00:05:14,060 --> 00:05:17,000
Oh, really? In that contract,
does she get a piece of the pie?
148
00:05:17,100 --> 00:05:19,004
- Uh...
- Don't answer that,
149
00:05:19,104 --> 00:05:20,672
attorney-client whatever.
150
00:05:20,773 --> 00:05:23,445
Uh, technically my services
are paid for by the uni...
151
00:05:23,545 --> 00:05:24,981
Shut up, Ken.
152
00:05:25,081 --> 00:05:26,584
Linda, be reasonable.
153
00:05:26,684 --> 00:05:28,121
I am.
154
00:05:28,222 --> 00:05:30,659
After all the Sheldon I've
put up with, I deserve this.
155
00:05:30,759 --> 00:05:34,199
You deserve this? My office
is basically his clubhouse.
156
00:05:35,402 --> 00:05:36,704
Okay, I tell you what I'll do.
157
00:05:36,805 --> 00:05:39,243
If Sheldon's okay with it,
158
00:05:39,344 --> 00:05:41,147
you're welcome to part of his cut.
159
00:05:41,247 --> 00:05:43,051
That's not you doing anything.
160
00:05:45,689 --> 00:05:46,791
Hi there, Connie.
161
00:05:46,892 --> 00:05:48,963
Pastor Jeff. What can I do for you?
162
00:05:49,063 --> 00:05:52,603
I was hoping we could chat
about your video store.
163
00:05:52,703 --> 00:05:53,704
What about it?
164
00:05:53,705 --> 00:05:58,414
I'm just so glad it's in the
hands of a good Christian woman.
165
00:05:58,514 --> 00:05:59,817
Where you headed here, padre?
166
00:05:59,998 --> 00:06:01,935
(clears throat) Well, some of my flock
167
00:06:02,035 --> 00:06:04,239
have concerns about
the movies y'all rent.
168
00:06:04,339 --> 00:06:07,880
You know, the ones
with the sexual content
169
00:06:07,981 --> 00:06:09,449
and whatnot.
170
00:06:09,549 --> 00:06:11,553
If they don't want to see whatnot,
171
00:06:11,653 --> 00:06:13,524
then they shouldn't rent whatnot.
172
00:06:13,624 --> 00:06:17,132
I hear you. God gave
us free will. (chuckles)
173
00:06:17,232 --> 00:06:18,934
But you're renting temptation.
174
00:06:19,036 --> 00:06:20,771
And you know who tempts us?
175
00:06:20,871 --> 00:06:22,209
The devil.
176
00:06:23,144 --> 00:06:25,815
So, that's who's making me want
to slam this door in your face.
177
00:06:25,915 --> 00:06:27,885
I'm just here to give you a heads-up.
178
00:06:27,986 --> 00:06:32,329
People are upset and I'd hate
to see your business suffer.
179
00:06:33,231 --> 00:06:35,735
- Are you threatening me?
- No, uh, I'm sorry.
180
00:06:35,835 --> 00:06:38,306
Uh, let me just take off my pastor hat,
181
00:06:38,407 --> 00:06:40,244
put on my neighbor cap,
182
00:06:40,345 --> 00:06:41,713
and start again.
183
00:06:41,813 --> 00:06:43,884
I'm gonna put on my hat, too.
184
00:06:43,984 --> 00:06:46,156
It's got a big foam finger on top of it.
185
00:06:46,256 --> 00:06:47,692
Guess which one.
186
00:06:47,792 --> 00:06:48,861
The naughty one?
187
00:06:48,961 --> 00:06:50,565
Bingo.
188
00:06:51,767 --> 00:06:53,470
♪
189
00:06:53,571 --> 00:06:55,941
Mr. Vance, thank you for
taking the time to see us.
190
00:06:56,042 --> 00:06:57,478
Oh, no problem. (chuckles)
191
00:06:57,578 --> 00:07:00,016
You know, I don't ordinarily handle
192
00:07:00,117 --> 00:07:02,088
intellectual property contracts,
193
00:07:02,188 --> 00:07:04,092
I'm more of a slip-and-fall guy.
194
00:07:04,192 --> 00:07:06,963
I have seen your face
on those park bench ads.
195
00:07:07,064 --> 00:07:11,672
Oh, you fall in the park, this
is the first thing you see.
196
00:07:11,772 --> 00:07:13,443
So, as I said on the phone,
197
00:07:13,543 --> 00:07:16,649
our son invented something that
his university's interested in,
198
00:07:16,749 --> 00:07:19,255
but we feel they might be trying to keep
199
00:07:19,355 --> 00:07:20,690
the lion's share for themselves.
200
00:07:20,790 --> 00:07:23,196
You really think it's
gonna be worth something?
201
00:07:23,296 --> 00:07:26,402
University seems to think
so. They want 90% of it.
202
00:07:26,502 --> 00:07:28,573
Oh, is that so?
203
00:07:29,675 --> 00:07:30,676
What's the invention?
204
00:07:30,744 --> 00:07:32,681
We don't really understand it.
205
00:07:32,781 --> 00:07:35,487
Oh, you know, it's a computer...
206
00:07:35,587 --> 00:07:36,922
- thing.
- (scoffs)
207
00:07:37,022 --> 00:07:39,628
Adding machine and carbon
paper got me this far.
208
00:07:39,728 --> 00:07:40,997
Mm.
209
00:07:41,097 --> 00:07:42,200
What... what am I smelling?
210
00:07:42,300 --> 00:07:44,438
Beef and broccoli.
211
00:07:44,538 --> 00:07:46,107
Chinese place downstairs.
212
00:07:46,208 --> 00:07:48,479
Ooh, do they have good chop
suey? I can never find good...
213
00:07:48,580 --> 00:07:50,750
- George.
- You were saying?
214
00:07:53,155 --> 00:07:55,727
Sheldon, we need to talk.
215
00:07:55,827 --> 00:07:58,700
You should keep your voice
down. This is a library.
216
00:08:00,837 --> 00:08:03,041
Do you remember when
we came up with the idea
217
00:08:03,141 --> 00:08:04,477
for that grant database?
218
00:08:04,577 --> 00:08:06,348
I remember when I came up with the idea.
219
00:08:06,448 --> 00:08:07,818
Uh, in my office.
220
00:08:07,918 --> 00:08:10,890
- In my brain.
- Which was in my office.
221
00:08:10,990 --> 00:08:12,360
And, as I recall,
222
00:08:12,460 --> 00:08:14,163
I was the one who suggested
you build a database.
223
00:08:14,264 --> 00:08:17,303
No, you suggested I build
a comic book database.
224
00:08:17,403 --> 00:08:20,243
Which was the underlying idea.
225
00:08:20,343 --> 00:08:22,913
Fire is the underlying idea
for the nuclear power plant,
226
00:08:23,013 --> 00:08:24,851
and no one credits the caveman.
227
00:08:26,488 --> 00:08:27,890
Son...
228
00:08:27,990 --> 00:08:30,629
and I call you son because
I think of you as family.
229
00:08:31,631 --> 00:08:33,535
Is this the way you would
treat your own family?
230
00:08:33,635 --> 00:08:36,708
Not my mom. Everyone
else is on their own.
231
00:08:37,877 --> 00:08:41,518
JEFF (in distance): Thank
you for saying no to sin!
232
00:08:41,618 --> 00:08:45,157
Oh, you got to be kidding me.
233
00:08:47,396 --> 00:08:48,699
What are you doing?
234
00:08:48,799 --> 00:08:50,703
We're just asking people
to sign our petition
235
00:08:50,803 --> 00:08:54,042
- if they agree that sin has no place in cinema.
- Huh.
236
00:08:54,142 --> 00:08:56,046
- Clever.
- Thanks.
237
00:08:56,146 --> 00:08:59,119
And God doesn't want us
seeing people's private parts.
238
00:08:59,219 --> 00:09:01,256
Didn't he make people's private parts?
239
00:09:01,357 --> 00:09:04,730
He did, and then he made
clothes to cover 'em right up.
240
00:09:04,831 --> 00:09:07,469
(sighs) You are scaring
away my customers.
241
00:09:07,569 --> 00:09:09,272
You know what's scarier? Hell.
242
00:09:09,373 --> 00:09:12,346
Look, you can't just sit
here in front of my store.
243
00:09:12,446 --> 00:09:14,316
Freedom of speech. We're allowed.
244
00:09:14,416 --> 00:09:16,387
And we're allowed to rent
whatever movies we want.
245
00:09:16,487 --> 00:09:17,756
People can choose for themselves.
246
00:09:17,856 --> 00:09:19,292
They sure can.
247
00:09:19,393 --> 00:09:22,566
If you love God and hate
the devil, sign here.
248
00:09:22,666 --> 00:09:26,239
Where is your halo? 'Cause
you are an angel. (chuckles)
249
00:09:27,942 --> 00:09:30,582
Let's just see what the
people think about this.
250
00:09:34,756 --> 00:09:35,647
Yeah.
251
00:09:39,439 --> 00:09:40,440
MEEMAW: What are you doing?
252
00:09:40,441 --> 00:09:42,477
We just finally got those
killjoys out of here.
253
00:09:42,578 --> 00:09:43,747
Yeah, it was amazing.
254
00:09:43,847 --> 00:09:45,517
Have you two lost your minds?
255
00:09:45,617 --> 00:09:47,120
We do not need this kind of attention.
256
00:09:47,220 --> 00:09:48,890
Attention's good.
257
00:09:48,990 --> 00:09:50,627
Like, free advertising.
258
00:09:50,727 --> 00:09:52,665
We're running an illegal
gambling room in the back.
259
00:09:52,765 --> 00:09:54,535
- Oh, that'll be fine.
- For you.
260
00:09:54,635 --> 00:09:56,639
If we get arrested,
y'all go to lady jail.
261
00:09:56,739 --> 00:09:59,378
I have to go to scary jail.
I'm too pretty for scary jail.
262
00:09:59,478 --> 00:10:00,814
No more prison movies for you.
263
00:10:00,914 --> 00:10:03,452
So you're saying we should just give in,
264
00:10:03,553 --> 00:10:06,224
after what that holy-rolling Muppet
265
00:10:06,324 --> 00:10:08,395
has done to your whole family?
266
00:10:08,495 --> 00:10:10,399
He does look like a Muppet.
267
00:10:10,499 --> 00:10:12,003
All I'm saying is we need to remember
268
00:10:12,103 --> 00:10:13,740
where the real money's coming from.
269
00:10:13,840 --> 00:10:16,713
If we want it to keep
coming, you got to back off.
270
00:10:18,115 --> 00:10:21,454
Okay, fine. I'll behave.
271
00:10:22,556 --> 00:10:24,560
When did you start to
be the responsible one?
272
00:10:24,661 --> 00:10:27,033
Hey, I don't like it, either.
273
00:10:28,368 --> 00:10:31,908
Ah, just the young genius
I was hoping to see.
274
00:10:32,710 --> 00:10:35,048
Look, I've heard from
your parents' lawyer,
275
00:10:35,149 --> 00:10:37,486
and I'm a little concerned
276
00:10:37,586 --> 00:10:39,858
that this whole thing
is getting out of hand.
277
00:10:39,958 --> 00:10:42,128
How so? Well, you know,
lawyers get involved
278
00:10:42,229 --> 00:10:45,469
and everything slows down
and, well, I'm just worried
279
00:10:45,569 --> 00:10:47,473
that someone else might come up
280
00:10:47,573 --> 00:10:49,276
with the same idea in the meantime.
281
00:10:49,377 --> 00:10:51,514
I didn't think of that.
We should get started.
282
00:10:51,614 --> 00:10:53,652
I agree, but, well, we can't get started
283
00:10:53,752 --> 00:10:55,488
until the paperwork is signed.
284
00:10:55,589 --> 00:10:57,626
Ugh! Those darn lawyers.
285
00:10:57,727 --> 00:10:59,262
Well, how can we fix this?
286
00:10:59,362 --> 00:11:07,145
Hmm. Well, I guess if you could,
well, convince your parents to sign,
287
00:11:07,245 --> 00:11:08,849
then we could get rolling.
288
00:11:10,820 --> 00:11:13,024
And to make it worth your while,
289
00:11:13,124 --> 00:11:16,797
how about we put your name
on one of these buildings?
290
00:11:16,897 --> 00:11:20,238
How would you feel about
"Sheldon Cooper Science Center"?
291
00:11:20,338 --> 00:11:22,709
I'm sorry. Did you say,
"Sheldon Cooper Science Center,"
292
00:11:22,809 --> 00:11:25,047
or "Sheldon Cooper's Science Center"?
293
00:11:25,148 --> 00:11:26,183
Well, which do you like?
294
00:11:26,283 --> 00:11:27,318
I prefer the possessive.
295
00:11:27,418 --> 00:11:28,755
It makes it much more mine.
296
00:11:28,855 --> 00:11:31,560
Then "Sheldon Cooper's
Science Center" it is.
297
00:11:31,660 --> 00:11:34,198
(laughs) So, do we have a deal?
298
00:11:34,299 --> 00:11:35,969
- Okay.
- Excellent.
299
00:11:36,069 --> 00:11:39,609
Now get out of here before
I pinch those cheeks.
300
00:11:41,312 --> 00:11:42,381
(sighs)
301
00:11:42,482 --> 00:11:44,051
(knocking)
302
00:11:44,151 --> 00:11:46,991
I will remind you my
wife is a police officer.
303
00:11:47,091 --> 00:11:49,830
I've just come with a
little peace offering.
304
00:11:50,999 --> 00:11:55,040
My last copy of Basic Instinct.
305
00:11:55,140 --> 00:11:59,248
So there you go. No more naked ladies,
306
00:11:59,348 --> 00:12:00,483
no more Michael Douglas'
307
00:12:00,583 --> 00:12:03,689
bare butt giving me impure thoughts.
308
00:12:04,591 --> 00:12:06,896
The town is safe again.
309
00:12:06,997 --> 00:12:09,301
Well, thank you for seeing reason.
310
00:12:09,401 --> 00:12:13,509
Well, what kind of good Christian
woman would I be if I didn't?
311
00:12:13,609 --> 00:12:15,848
- (chuckles)
- So, we square?
312
00:12:15,948 --> 00:12:18,719
It's not about you and
me being square, Connie.
313
00:12:18,820 --> 00:12:22,561
It's about you and El Jefe Grande.
314
00:12:22,661 --> 00:12:25,567
Mm-hmm.
315
00:12:25,667 --> 00:12:28,072
Well, goodbye.
316
00:12:28,172 --> 00:12:30,376
You know, I'd be happy to come down
317
00:12:30,477 --> 00:12:32,346
and let you know what other
movies are objectionable
318
00:12:32,446 --> 00:12:35,286
so we don't have another
situation on our hands.
319
00:12:35,386 --> 00:12:39,094
You want to take more
movies out of my store?
320
00:12:39,194 --> 00:12:41,699
Again, not me, but
there's a guy with a thumb
321
00:12:41,799 --> 00:12:44,137
a lot bigger than Siskel or Ebert's.
322
00:12:48,345 --> 00:12:50,249
Sheldon, thank you for coming in.
323
00:12:50,349 --> 00:12:53,355
I want to apologize for
our little tiff earlier.
324
00:12:53,455 --> 00:12:54,457
You're forgiven.
325
00:12:54,557 --> 00:12:55,994
Oh. Great.
326
00:12:56,094 --> 00:13:00,402
I found something that
might be of interest to you.
327
00:13:00,502 --> 00:13:03,608
An authentic signature
from Richard Feynman.
328
00:13:03,708 --> 00:13:04,877
Where did you get this?
329
00:13:04,978 --> 00:13:06,214
Details aren't important.
330
00:13:06,314 --> 00:13:08,585
- Is this a restraining order?
- Not important.
331
00:13:08,685 --> 00:13:10,155
That's actually a really
good way to get autographs.
332
00:13:10,255 --> 00:13:11,858
I'll have to keep that in mind.
333
00:13:11,959 --> 00:13:14,063
Well, it's yours, from
one scientist to another,
334
00:13:14,163 --> 00:13:15,532
and that's my point, really.
335
00:13:15,632 --> 00:13:18,438
- You and I... we need to stick together.
- Why?
336
00:13:18,538 --> 00:13:20,909
Because this university
is filled with people
337
00:13:21,010 --> 00:13:22,780
who want to exploit our ideas.
338
00:13:22,880 --> 00:13:24,316
That's not my experience.
339
00:13:24,416 --> 00:13:26,253
President Hagemeyer just
offered me my own building.
340
00:13:26,353 --> 00:13:28,324
You're being manipulated,
you don't even know it.
341
00:13:28,424 --> 00:13:30,528
Sheldon, I've seen
this a thousand times...
342
00:13:30,628 --> 00:13:34,403
a brilliant young mind like
yours taken advantage of.
343
00:13:34,503 --> 00:13:36,207
But isn't that what you're trying to do?
344
00:13:36,307 --> 00:13:38,044
Absolutely not.
345
00:13:38,144 --> 00:13:39,947
President Hagemeyer's was a bribe.
346
00:13:40,048 --> 00:13:43,954
That is a gift from one peer to another.
347
00:13:44,056 --> 00:13:46,027
(laughs) So what do you say?
348
00:13:46,127 --> 00:13:47,762
Are you a scientist
349
00:13:47,862 --> 00:13:49,599
or are you a pawn of the administration?
350
00:13:49,699 --> 00:13:50,868
A scientist.
351
00:13:50,968 --> 00:13:52,705
Yes, you are. (laughs)
352
00:13:52,805 --> 00:13:54,509
So, we have a deal?
353
00:13:54,609 --> 00:13:57,148
Okay.
354
00:13:57,249 --> 00:13:58,851
MEEMAW: I'd like to order
355
00:13:58,951 --> 00:14:01,156
five more copies of Basic Instinct
356
00:14:01,256 --> 00:14:05,164
and a couple more of Fatal Attraction.
357
00:14:05,264 --> 00:14:08,804
- Anything else?
- Ooh, uh, get a Last Temptation of Christ.
358
00:14:08,904 --> 00:14:10,307
That'll really piss people off.
359
00:14:10,407 --> 00:14:13,480
And a copy of The Last
Temptation of Christ
360
00:14:13,581 --> 00:14:14,883
to really piss people off.
361
00:14:14,983 --> 00:14:16,787
Thank you.
362
00:14:16,887 --> 00:14:18,456
What are y'all doing?
363
00:14:18,556 --> 00:14:20,895
Well, I tried to be
nice but he kept pushing.
364
00:14:20,995 --> 00:14:22,431
Yeah, so now we're pushing back.
365
00:14:22,531 --> 00:14:23,766
Why do you care?
366
00:14:23,867 --> 00:14:25,170
Because I don't like
anybody telling me how
367
00:14:25,270 --> 00:14:27,074
to run my business, especially him.
368
00:14:27,174 --> 00:14:29,212
This is not your business.
369
00:14:29,312 --> 00:14:31,416
That room back there with
the shady piles of money...
370
00:14:31,516 --> 00:14:34,955
that's your business. Your
secret, illegal business.
371
00:14:35,056 --> 00:14:36,826
So, what, are we just supposed
372
00:14:36,926 --> 00:14:38,930
to become a Christian video store now?
373
00:14:39,030 --> 00:14:40,967
You know what? In this town, I...
374
00:14:41,067 --> 00:14:43,673
No! I am not gonna let that man win.
375
00:14:43,773 --> 00:14:45,944
Hi. I'm with Channel 7 news.
376
00:14:46,044 --> 00:14:47,548
Can I help you?
377
00:14:47,648 --> 00:14:50,787
A local pastor has put
together a petition of citizens
378
00:14:50,887 --> 00:14:53,960
concerned about the vulgar
content of your video store.
379
00:14:54,060 --> 00:14:55,363
Would you care to comment?
380
00:14:55,464 --> 00:14:57,968
Damn straight I would.
I want him to know...
381
00:14:58,068 --> 00:15:00,038
- Give me. Give me.
- No, give me that. I want...
382
00:15:01,275 --> 00:15:02,978
I can assure you there's nothing immoral
383
00:15:03,078 --> 00:15:03,994
or indecent going on here.
384
00:15:06,814 --> 00:15:07,822
Mm. So, we were talking to the lawyer...
385
00:15:07,823 --> 00:15:09,571
Here comes the divorce.
386
00:15:09,672 --> 00:15:11,118
We are not getting divorced.
387
00:15:11,219 --> 00:15:12,462
Then why do we have a lawyer?
388
00:15:12,564 --> 00:15:13,774
Sheldon invented something
389
00:15:13,875 --> 00:15:15,052
that the university's interested in
390
00:15:15,153 --> 00:15:16,901
and it could be worth some money.
391
00:15:17,002 --> 00:15:18,684
You always were my favorite brother.
392
00:15:18,785 --> 00:15:20,936
This morning you licked your
finger and put it in my ear.
393
00:15:21,037 --> 00:15:22,381
That means I like you.
394
00:15:22,482 --> 00:15:24,298
Anyway, the lawyer wants
to sit down with you
395
00:15:24,398 --> 00:15:26,349
before he gets into
it with the university.
396
00:15:26,450 --> 00:15:28,837
I don't know. I hear
lawyers slow things down.
397
00:15:28,938 --> 00:15:29,981
What?
398
00:15:30,082 --> 00:15:31,662
Shelly, this is for your future.
399
00:15:31,763 --> 00:15:35,091
We're just trying to make
sure that you're taken care of.
400
00:15:35,192 --> 00:15:36,740
I don't care about money.
401
00:15:36,841 --> 00:15:39,933
Well, someday you might when
you have your own wife and kids.
402
00:15:40,034 --> 00:15:41,547
I don't see that happening.
403
00:15:41,647 --> 00:15:44,371
No one sees that happening.
And I say that with love.
404
00:15:44,472 --> 00:15:46,456
Sheldon, this is important to all of us.
405
00:15:46,557 --> 00:15:48,810
Uh, you got to think about your family.
406
00:15:48,911 --> 00:15:50,558
Shelly, he's right.
407
00:15:50,659 --> 00:15:54,055
Did you put extra hot
dogs in this spaghetti?
408
00:15:54,156 --> 00:15:55,837
I did.
409
00:15:56,812 --> 00:15:59,738
Okay, I'll talk with the lawyer.
410
00:16:00,545 --> 00:16:02,764
(whispering): You're good.
411
00:16:04,344 --> 00:16:06,899
Well, I'm-I'm so glad that
we can all sit down together.
412
00:16:07,001 --> 00:16:10,799
And I have a feeling we are
gonna come to a quick agreement.
413
00:16:11,641 --> 00:16:14,398
I have a feeling we are.
414
00:16:14,498 --> 00:16:15,910
So, I have redrawn the contracts...
415
00:16:16,011 --> 00:16:17,558
Sorry we're late.
416
00:16:17,659 --> 00:16:19,844
What are you doing here? And who's he?
417
00:16:19,945 --> 00:16:21,559
- I'm his cousin.
- And lawyer.
418
00:16:21,660 --> 00:16:23,308
Really, Grant?
419
00:16:23,409 --> 00:16:25,325
- Yeah, really.
- Let me talk for you.
420
00:16:25,426 --> 00:16:26,636
Yeah, really.
421
00:16:26,737 --> 00:16:29,495
Okay. Fine, fine. Stay.
422
00:16:30,470 --> 00:16:32,353
It really doesn't make
any difference because
423
00:16:32,454 --> 00:16:36,152
Sheldon agrees that this is in
the best interest of everyone.
424
00:16:36,254 --> 00:16:38,506
- You said that?
- Yes.
425
00:16:38,607 --> 00:16:41,196
- Hold on. Sheldon told me...
- Grant.
426
00:16:42,843 --> 00:16:46,272
Sheldon informed my client that
their interests were aligned.
427
00:16:46,374 --> 00:16:48,425
- You told him that?
- Yes.
428
00:16:48,526 --> 00:16:50,643
You told me he was on our side.
429
00:16:50,644 --> 00:16:52,291
Didn't you tell them that?
430
00:16:52,393 --> 00:16:53,401
Yes.
431
00:16:53,402 --> 00:16:54,915
Which is it, Sheldon?
432
00:16:55,015 --> 00:16:58,209
Yeah, Sheldon. Whose side are you on?
433
00:16:58,309 --> 00:17:00,059
Shelly?
434
00:17:00,866 --> 00:17:03,656
I don't know and I don't care.
435
00:17:03,757 --> 00:17:05,068
I just want to build the database.
436
00:17:05,169 --> 00:17:07,725
Why can't this just
be about the science?
437
00:17:07,826 --> 00:17:10,280
W-why are you making
it all about the money?
438
00:17:11,087 --> 00:17:13,811
This was supposed to be
exciting, and you're ruining it.
439
00:17:16,231 --> 00:17:18,350
Oh...
440
00:17:18,450 --> 00:17:21,343
I'm telling you, I can do it on my own.
441
00:17:21,443 --> 00:17:22,789
Shelly?
442
00:17:23,595 --> 00:17:25,848
I don't want to be
in the middle anymore.
443
00:17:25,949 --> 00:17:28,908
I know. I... I came out to apologize.
444
00:17:29,009 --> 00:17:30,454
We made that all about us
445
00:17:30,555 --> 00:17:32,505
and it should be about what you want.
446
00:17:32,606 --> 00:17:34,220
Thanks.
447
00:17:34,321 --> 00:17:38,222
So... why don't you take a little time
448
00:17:38,322 --> 00:17:40,710
and figure out what's
gonna make you happy?
449
00:17:40,811 --> 00:17:41,987
I will.
450
00:17:42,088 --> 00:17:43,366
Okay, I did.
451
00:17:43,467 --> 00:17:46,728
Oh. All right. Well,
what did you decide?
452
00:17:46,829 --> 00:17:49,587
- I'm cutting everybody out and doing this myself.
- What?
453
00:17:49,687 --> 00:17:52,142
I don't need the university
and I don't need Dr. Linkletter.
454
00:17:52,243 --> 00:17:54,092
How are you gonna pay for all this?
455
00:17:54,193 --> 00:17:55,605
I'll find private investors.
456
00:17:55,705 --> 00:17:57,555
They can pay for it on the
condition I'm left alone.
457
00:17:57,656 --> 00:18:00,884
Are you sure you don't want to
think about this a little more?
458
00:18:00,986 --> 00:18:02,397
Perhaps you're right.
459
00:18:02,498 --> 00:18:04,851
- Done. I'm good.
- Where you going?
460
00:18:04,952 --> 00:18:07,205
My dorm. I have some
calls to make. Love you.
461
00:18:07,306 --> 00:18:08,932
Love you, too.
462
00:18:17,236 --> 00:18:18,871
Don't you have Die Hard?
463
00:18:18,971 --> 00:18:21,106
- Not anymore.
- Why?
464
00:18:21,206 --> 00:18:23,376
It had that bad word in it.
465
00:18:23,476 --> 00:18:27,714
- What?
- "Yippee-ki-yay," etcetera.
466
00:18:28,481 --> 00:18:30,718
This store sucks.
467
00:18:30,818 --> 00:18:32,053
We know.
468
00:18:32,153 --> 00:18:34,556
- Maybe you'd like The Singing Nun.
- Nope.
469
00:18:35,857 --> 00:18:39,461
Has anybody ever rented The Singing Nun?
470
00:18:41,964 --> 00:18:43,398
Just Pastor Jeff.
471
00:18:43,498 --> 00:18:45,000
That figures.
472
00:18:45,100 --> 00:18:46,468
Wait a minute.
473
00:18:46,569 --> 00:18:50,423
You can see all the movies
that Pastor Jeff ever rented?
474
00:18:50,424 --> 00:18:53,009
You can see any movie everyone's rented.
475
00:18:53,109 --> 00:18:57,447
Well, let's just see if he's
as pious as he pretends to be.
476
00:18:57,548 --> 00:19:01,051
Let's find out. (grunts)
477
00:19:01,151 --> 00:19:02,152
(typing)
478
00:19:02,252 --> 00:19:04,522
Jesus Christ Superstar,
479
00:19:04,623 --> 00:19:07,125
Jesus of Nazareth,
480
00:19:07,225 --> 00:19:08,393
The Blood of Jesus.
481
00:19:08,493 --> 00:19:09,728
Good Lord.
482
00:19:09,828 --> 00:19:11,362
How many Jesus movies are there?
483
00:19:11,462 --> 00:19:13,032
Oh, what about his wife?
484
00:19:13,132 --> 00:19:15,534
- Oh.
- Mm.
485
00:19:15,635 --> 00:19:18,638
- Show me, show me.
- Mm.
486
00:19:21,007 --> 00:19:22,075
Hello, Pastor Jeff.
487
00:19:22,175 --> 00:19:23,443
- (door closes)
- Hey there, Connie.
488
00:19:23,543 --> 00:19:24,978
What brings you by?
489
00:19:25,078 --> 00:19:29,216
I just wanted to drop off a little gift.
490
00:19:29,316 --> 00:19:30,852
Dirty Dancing?
491
00:19:30,952 --> 00:19:33,221
I think you know how I
feel about this movie.
492
00:19:33,321 --> 00:19:35,123
I do.
493
00:19:35,223 --> 00:19:37,859
I also know how your
wife feels about it.
494
00:19:37,959 --> 00:19:39,094
What?
495
00:19:39,194 --> 00:19:40,596
She's rented it five times.
496
00:19:40,696 --> 00:19:43,465
That's a lot of
shirtless Patrick Swayze.
497
00:19:43,565 --> 00:19:45,300
Must be some mistake.
498
00:19:45,400 --> 00:19:48,338
There isn't. Shall we talk
about Fatal Attraction?
499
00:19:48,438 --> 00:19:50,473
- Do we have to?
- Six times.
500
00:19:50,573 --> 00:19:53,343
- Are you blackmailing me?
- Yeah.
501
00:19:53,443 --> 00:19:54,778
Well, it's not gonna work.
502
00:19:54,878 --> 00:19:57,081
I'm a man of principles
and I stand by them.
503
00:19:57,181 --> 00:19:59,050
And I respect that.
504
00:20:00,184 --> 00:20:03,154
So let's talk about what your
church elders are renting.
505
00:20:03,254 --> 00:20:05,157
- Oh, come on.
- Want to know?
506
00:20:05,257 --> 00:20:06,358
Is it bad?
507
00:20:06,458 --> 00:20:09,427
- It's Porky's bad.
- (whimpers)
508
00:20:09,527 --> 00:20:11,363
How your principles feeling now?
509
00:20:12,130 --> 00:20:13,833
ADULT SHELDON:
I'm going to end this story
510
00:20:13,933 --> 00:20:16,335
so you don't have to see
a grown man beg for mercy.
511
00:20:16,435 --> 00:20:18,037
Connie, please...
512
00:20:19,028 --> 00:20:24,029
- Synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -
37942
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