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MAN: This holiday season,
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00:00:33,758 --> 00:00:35,758
show your loved ones
that you really care
3
00:00:35,793 --> 00:00:38,758
by getting them the gift
that they've always wanted.
4
00:00:38,793 --> 00:00:41,758
Whoa, Dad! Really?!
5
00:00:41,793 --> 00:00:43,344
GIRL: Yes!
6
00:00:43,379 --> 00:00:45,137
Is there anything else?
[ Gasps ] Wow.
7
00:00:45,172 --> 00:00:47,689
Slim Jenko!
This is just what I wanted!
8
00:00:47,724 --> 00:00:49,758
I want some!
9
00:00:49,793 --> 00:00:51,620
We can all have some.
10
00:00:51,655 --> 00:00:54,068
MAN: We here at Slim Jenko
pride ourselves
11
00:00:54,103 --> 00:00:57,103
on delivering a rich,
flavorful malt beverage
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00:00:57,137 --> 00:00:58,655
for the entire family.
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00:00:58,689 --> 00:01:01,448
Make us part
of your holiday tradition.
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00:01:01,482 --> 00:01:03,758
MAN #2: This Friday night
at midnight on Channel 83.
15
00:01:03,793 --> 00:01:05,758
-Mommy!
-Lester.
16
00:01:05,793 --> 00:01:07,379
Lester, what are you doing?
17
00:01:07,413 --> 00:01:10,379
"Killed on Christmas:
The Lester Lord stor--"
18
00:01:10,413 --> 00:01:15,206
[ Hard rock music playing ]
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00:01:15,241 --> 00:01:19,034
WOMAN: Including a regulation
busting 2,500 milligrams
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00:01:19,068 --> 00:01:20,620
of pure THC.
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00:01:20,655 --> 00:01:22,448
MAN #3: Kunz Christmas
Creampies,
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00:01:22,482 --> 00:01:25,241
an established cream pie
professional for over 50--
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00:01:25,275 --> 00:01:27,586
MAN #4: The U.S. Defense
Department has spent over
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00:01:27,620 --> 00:01:30,482
a trillion dollars on the most
cutting edge robot technology,
25
00:01:30,517 --> 00:01:33,620
deployed overseas for a swift
victory against America's
26
00:01:33,655 --> 00:01:37,137
deadliest enemies, and now
Sowell Robotic Products
27
00:01:37,172 --> 00:01:40,620
is here to make that technology
fun for the entire family.
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00:01:42,724 --> 00:01:45,068
Ho. Ho. Ho.
29
00:01:45,103 --> 00:01:46,758
MAN #4:
Introducing RoboSanta Plus
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00:01:46,793 --> 00:01:48,482
for the upcoming holiday season,
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00:01:48,517 --> 00:01:51,344
with a vocabulary
of over 90,000 words,
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00:01:51,379 --> 00:01:52,724
a full range of motion,
33
00:01:52,758 --> 00:01:54,689
and built with
military grade construction,
34
00:01:54,724 --> 00:01:57,655
RoboSanta Plus fully replaces
your local degenerate
35
00:01:57,689 --> 00:02:00,655
mall Santa, keeping you
and your children safe.
36
00:02:00,689 --> 00:02:04,068
Exclusively this weekend
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00:02:04,103 --> 00:02:09,517
at Midland Mall and GW Bonkers.
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00:02:09,551 --> 00:02:11,137
[ Static ]
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00:02:11,172 --> 00:02:22,793
♪♪
40
00:02:22,827 --> 00:02:34,620
♪♪
41
00:02:34,655 --> 00:02:38,241
♪ I am the yule tide cold
42
00:02:38,275 --> 00:02:41,241
♪ Leave the winter closed
43
00:02:41,862 --> 00:02:45,206
♪ Like hive of holy
44
00:02:45,241 --> 00:02:48,448
♪ Well, I dream of you
45
00:02:48,482 --> 00:02:52,103
♪ Nothing is
46
00:02:52,137 --> 00:02:55,206
♪ And the slick
47
00:02:55,241 --> 00:02:59,034
♪ To not peak at your
breast, love ♪
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00:02:59,068 --> 00:03:03,275
♪ Before the devil reigns
49
00:03:03,310 --> 00:03:05,448
TORI: Thanks for
coming in, guys.
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00:03:05,482 --> 00:03:08,344
Thank you. Have a good one.
51
00:03:08,379 --> 00:03:10,724
Oh, shit!
52
00:03:10,758 --> 00:03:12,551
Hi.
53
00:03:12,586 --> 00:03:14,551
You look amazing.
54
00:03:14,586 --> 00:03:17,379
Hey, let me know if
you need anything.
55
00:03:17,413 --> 00:03:19,413
TORI: Hey, it's almost 7:00,
so I'm going to start
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00:03:19,448 --> 00:03:21,068
closing up out back.
You got it?
57
00:03:21,103 --> 00:03:23,137
-Yeah.
-Oh, can you put this away?
58
00:03:23,172 --> 00:03:24,827
-Sure.
-Thank you.
59
00:03:24,862 --> 00:03:26,068
-Hey!
-Oh, shit.
60
00:03:26,103 --> 00:03:27,586
-Merry Christmas.
-Hi.
61
00:03:27,620 --> 00:03:29,241
It's about time you show
your fucking face around here.
62
00:03:29,275 --> 00:03:30,482
Yeah, I've been busy.
You guys are swamped.
63
00:03:30,517 --> 00:03:32,103
-I know, I know.
64
00:03:32,137 --> 00:03:33,655
I thought you and Lahna
were closing tonight.
65
00:03:33,689 --> 00:03:36,172
Yeah, no, I told her I had to
run home because I, um...
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00:03:36,206 --> 00:03:37,448
Didn't get her gift.
67
00:03:37,482 --> 00:03:39,034
-I did get her a gift.
-Oh, did you?
68
00:03:39,068 --> 00:03:40,413
But I'm now second guessing it,
so now I'm going
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00:03:40,448 --> 00:03:41,827
-to get some records.
-Oh, yeah, you should be
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00:03:41,862 --> 00:03:43,310
second guessing this.
She has both of these.
71
00:03:43,344 --> 00:03:44,793
-She does.
-She does. Yeah.
72
00:03:44,827 --> 00:03:46,551
Uh, follow me. Come on.
73
00:03:46,586 --> 00:03:48,517
You guys been together
for, what, like a year?
74
00:03:48,551 --> 00:03:50,206
How are you this fucking dumb?
75
00:03:50,241 --> 00:03:52,034
No, I'm not -- It's --
I can't tell the difference
76
00:03:52,068 --> 00:03:54,310
between all these bands that
the logos all look the same.
77
00:03:54,344 --> 00:03:56,068
-They all look the fucking same?
-They all look the same.
78
00:03:56,103 --> 00:03:58,034
-All scratchy and weird.
-Yeah, they kind of do.
79
00:03:58,068 --> 00:04:01,655
Uh, all right, so what I'm going
to show you now -- Yes.
80
00:04:01,689 --> 00:04:04,034
We saw these guys open at
a festival this summer.
81
00:04:04,068 --> 00:04:07,517
She was fucking all over it.
They've got the psychedelic,
82
00:04:07,551 --> 00:04:09,137
cosmic riff.
She'll fucking love it.
83
00:04:09,172 --> 00:04:10,379
-Deathcrux?
-Yeah.
84
00:04:10,413 --> 00:04:11,793
Okay. And she does
not have this?
85
00:04:11,827 --> 00:04:13,379
-She does not have this.
-Right on.
86
00:04:13,413 --> 00:04:14,724
-You're welcome.
-Yes. No, thank you, Tori.
87
00:04:14,758 --> 00:04:16,620
Thank you.
You saved Christmas again.
88
00:04:16,655 --> 00:04:20,517
TORI: By the way, I will come
and say Merry Christmas
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00:04:20,551 --> 00:04:22,172
-to Lauren.
-Sounds good.
90
00:04:22,206 --> 00:04:23,827
But just don't tell her
I showed up here, okay?
91
00:04:23,862 --> 00:04:25,724
-What are you talking about?
-Don't do the whole thing you do
92
00:04:25,758 --> 00:04:27,275
-when you're like --
-"Oh, my God, it's so good
93
00:04:27,310 --> 00:04:29,241
-to see you.
-No, yeah, don't do that.
94
00:04:29,275 --> 00:04:30,379
-Okay, bye.
-Okay.
95
00:04:30,413 --> 00:04:31,724
-Robbie.
-Hey, bro.
96
00:04:31,758 --> 00:04:33,310
-Merry Christmas.
-Merry Christmas, man.
97
00:04:33,344 --> 00:04:36,172
♪ Bloody Christmas,
bloody Christmas ♪
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00:04:36,206 --> 00:04:39,068
♪ Bloody Christmas,
bloody Christmas ♪
99
00:04:41,551 --> 00:04:44,068
ROBBIE: Fuck yeah.
Almost 2 grand.
100
00:04:44,103 --> 00:04:47,379
-Yeah, that's a big day.
-Does that mean a big boy bonus?
101
00:04:47,413 --> 00:04:50,103
-Means a bonus, yeah.
-Fuck yeah, dawg!
102
00:04:50,137 --> 00:04:52,620
[ Chuckles ] What are you going
to do with your big bonus?
103
00:04:52,655 --> 00:04:54,103
You got any plans?
104
00:04:54,137 --> 00:04:55,344
Well, the talent show
is at 8:00 p.m.
105
00:04:55,379 --> 00:04:57,068
-So, no, not really.
-Yeah.
106
00:04:57,103 --> 00:04:58,758
What are you going to do this
fine Christmas Eve?
107
00:04:58,793 --> 00:05:03,689
I was potentially going to go
meet up with a dude,
108
00:05:03,724 --> 00:05:05,724
but I don't know.
109
00:05:05,758 --> 00:05:07,344
-A dude, a man.
-Yep.
110
00:05:07,379 --> 00:05:08,689
Okay, on Christmas Eve,
you're going to invite
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00:05:08,724 --> 00:05:10,448
a stranger to your house.
112
00:05:10,482 --> 00:05:11,689
Uh, a stranger to
Reggie's, yeah.
113
00:05:11,724 --> 00:05:13,275
Okay, cool.
Fuck, they're still open.
114
00:05:13,310 --> 00:05:15,034
-[ Chuckles ]
-Did you meet him organically,
115
00:05:15,068 --> 00:05:16,551
or is this, like, a tinder
sort of scenario?
116
00:05:16,586 --> 00:05:19,482
-Tinder situation, yeah.
-Oh, Tinder, okay.
117
00:05:19,517 --> 00:05:20,758
-Yeah.
-Can I see him?
118
00:05:20,793 --> 00:05:23,517
-Eh.
-Eh. He must be a fucking stud.
119
00:05:23,551 --> 00:05:25,103
What the fuck else
am I supposed to do?
120
00:05:25,137 --> 00:05:27,551
You want me to go home,
drink some whiskey,
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00:05:27,586 --> 00:05:30,482
sit by the fire by my lonesome,
watch "A Christmas Story"
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00:05:30,517 --> 00:05:33,413
like every other
fucking douchebag in America?
123
00:05:33,448 --> 00:05:35,206
Yeah. Sounds kind of nice.
124
00:05:35,241 --> 00:05:38,206
Or you to go to
drink some whiskey with me.
125
00:05:38,241 --> 00:05:39,482
Uh, that Lahna's Christmas gift.
126
00:05:39,517 --> 00:05:41,034
-Is it?
-So you can put a fuckin' --
127
00:05:41,068 --> 00:05:42,724
-No longer.
-What the fuck are you doing?
128
00:05:42,758 --> 00:05:44,344
So, fuck no.
129
00:05:44,379 --> 00:05:45,655
I wanted to do that, too.
130
00:05:45,689 --> 00:05:48,034
So hand me some cups,
and let's go.
131
00:05:48,068 --> 00:05:50,068
Are you gonna go see
your pops up north tomorrow?
132
00:05:50,103 --> 00:05:51,482
-Yeah.
-You should probably get
133
00:05:51,517 --> 00:05:53,137
-a head start late tonight.
-No. Fuck that.
134
00:05:53,172 --> 00:05:54,482
One day, in and out, is my rule.
135
00:05:54,517 --> 00:05:56,068
I can't see anything
wrong in that.
136
00:05:56,103 --> 00:05:57,413
-Fair enough.
-Mazel tov.
137
00:05:57,448 --> 00:06:01,275
ROBBIE: Mazel tov.
Cheers, motherfucker.
138
00:06:01,310 --> 00:06:03,034
Only quit stalling.
Show me Tommy Tinder.
139
00:06:03,068 --> 00:06:05,034
What the fuck is
your obsession with this?
140
00:06:05,068 --> 00:06:06,482
-I want to see him.
-I don't want to
141
00:06:06,517 --> 00:06:07,758
-show him to you.
-Is he big? Is he a big boy?
142
00:06:07,793 --> 00:06:09,241
-Oh.
-BBW.
143
00:06:09,275 --> 00:06:10,620
-That what you want to know?
-Yeah.
144
00:06:10,655 --> 00:06:13,620
In that case,
I'll fuckin' show you. Here.
145
00:06:16,206 --> 00:06:17,517
What?
146
00:06:17,551 --> 00:06:19,379
I didn't know you knew
Emmett Eyeliner.
147
00:06:19,413 --> 00:06:21,448
Emmett Eyeliner.
Why are you calling him that?
148
00:06:21,482 --> 00:06:22,827
-Do you know him?
-I know of him.
149
00:06:22,862 --> 00:06:24,482
Did he tell you he got,
like, three kids?
150
00:06:24,517 --> 00:06:26,206
Wait four.
Someone's pregnant now, I think.
151
00:06:26,241 --> 00:06:28,551
-Oh, fuck! He's got kids?
-Yeah.
152
00:06:28,586 --> 00:06:30,241
I don't fucking care.
153
00:06:30,275 --> 00:06:32,620
I just want a little
Christmas Eve schlong.
154
00:06:32,655 --> 00:06:35,241
Well, dude's a genic jackhammer.
155
00:06:35,275 --> 00:06:37,413
-Oh, Jesus.
-Little, uh, sperm canon,
156
00:06:37,448 --> 00:06:39,206
all I'm saying.
157
00:06:39,241 --> 00:06:41,413
Okay, I'm happy you told me
that, so I'll wear my dental dam
158
00:06:41,448 --> 00:06:43,551
and get fucking sauced
before he shows up.
159
00:06:43,586 --> 00:06:45,482
Thank you.
That's so sweet of you.
160
00:06:45,517 --> 00:06:46,517
ROBBIE: Well,
I'll tell you what.
161
00:06:46,551 --> 00:06:48,034
I can go to Reggie's with you
162
00:06:48,068 --> 00:06:50,379
because, um, I don't really
have shit to do.
163
00:06:50,413 --> 00:06:52,620
Robbie, that's very,
very sweet of you,
164
00:06:52,655 --> 00:06:53,827
but I want to get laid.
165
00:06:53,862 --> 00:06:55,586
Not wax poetic
with the regulars.
166
00:06:55,620 --> 00:06:58,482
Well, seeing as you didn't
buy me a Christmas present
167
00:06:58,517 --> 00:07:00,344
this year, I'm going
to take this.
168
00:07:00,379 --> 00:07:01,724
-Oh.
-Thank you.
169
00:07:01,758 --> 00:07:03,551
And you can enjoy your,
what, two hours
170
00:07:03,586 --> 00:07:07,758
of unbearable conversation,
your 7 seconds of lame sex.
171
00:07:07,793 --> 00:07:11,827
You go home, probably, you know,
get yourself off anyway.
172
00:07:11,862 --> 00:07:13,517
Or, I'm just throwing
this out there,
173
00:07:13,551 --> 00:07:18,241
you can have two hours of
amazing, vivacious,
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00:07:18,275 --> 00:07:22,172
sort of hauntingly
erotic conversation.
175
00:07:22,206 --> 00:07:24,034
-Hauntingly erotic?
-Hauntingly erotic?
176
00:07:24,068 --> 00:07:25,758
And you can go home anyway.
177
00:07:25,793 --> 00:07:28,551
You know, get yourself off,
like, flick your little bean.
178
00:07:28,586 --> 00:07:30,379
-Oh?
-Yeah.
179
00:07:30,413 --> 00:07:32,517
And you don't have to wake up
next to 30 Seconds To Mars.
180
00:07:32,551 --> 00:07:34,758
All right, well, I've got
a proposition for you.
181
00:07:34,793 --> 00:07:36,620
How about you give me back
my fucking whiskey
182
00:07:36,655 --> 00:07:40,344
and stop talking about me
flicking at my fucking bean?
183
00:07:40,379 --> 00:07:41,482
-Okay.
-How about that?
184
00:07:41,517 --> 00:07:43,206
Have you confirmed with him?
185
00:07:43,241 --> 00:07:46,034
No, I have not given him a time.
186
00:07:46,068 --> 00:07:47,620
Poor guy. It's kind of sad.
He's probably at home
187
00:07:47,655 --> 00:07:50,620
scrolling through your
social media, fingers sweaty,
188
00:07:50,655 --> 00:07:53,655
hand firmly on cock, just...
189
00:07:53,689 --> 00:07:55,413
beating that meat,
waiting for your text
190
00:07:55,448 --> 00:07:57,724
to pop up at the top.
191
00:07:57,758 --> 00:07:59,482
Mm. I've blown off
twice already, so.
192
00:07:59,517 --> 00:08:01,034
-Third time's a charm.
-Yeah.
193
00:08:01,068 --> 00:08:03,655
Come on, get a drink
with your old pal Robbie.
194
00:08:03,689 --> 00:08:06,827
It's my long time
employee Robbie.
195
00:08:06,862 --> 00:08:09,241
-That's a little bit harsh.
-It's true. I own you.
196
00:08:09,275 --> 00:08:10,689
-You own me?
-You're on my payroll. Yeah.
197
00:08:10,724 --> 00:08:12,689
Mama. Okay. Okay. Okay.
198
00:08:12,724 --> 00:08:15,827
I'm going to change your mind.
Have you heard his music?
199
00:08:15,862 --> 00:08:18,758
-I have not bothered, no.
-Oh, that answers a lot.
200
00:08:18,793 --> 00:08:20,379
Why? What you got?
201
00:08:20,413 --> 00:08:21,724
ROBBIE: I'll show you something
Something fun.
202
00:08:21,758 --> 00:08:23,172
TORI: Hmm.
203
00:08:23,206 --> 00:08:25,137
All right. Ready?
204
00:08:25,172 --> 00:08:27,206
I'm losing interest already.
Come on.
205
00:08:27,241 --> 00:08:28,551
Alright, you'll see.
206
00:08:28,586 --> 00:08:30,034
Hang on, hang on, hang on,
hang on, hang on.
207
00:08:30,068 --> 00:08:32,620
What?
208
00:08:33,862 --> 00:08:35,620
-Oh, my God.
-Soothing.
209
00:08:35,655 --> 00:08:37,344
TORI: Shut the fuck up.
Why is he whisper singing?
210
00:08:37,379 --> 00:08:38,793
ROBBIE: Doesn't want to
wake his parents, probably.
211
00:08:38,827 --> 00:08:40,206
What the fuck?
Turn that off.
212
00:08:40,241 --> 00:08:41,758
Why are you showing
that to me? Stop.
213
00:08:41,793 --> 00:08:43,413
Well, you know, it's not like
you're going to saddle up
214
00:08:43,448 --> 00:08:45,275
with the son of a bitch.
I mean, you should probably
215
00:08:45,310 --> 00:08:48,344
let the guy go back
to his family and his kids.
216
00:08:48,379 --> 00:08:49,758
He's a daddy, after all.
217
00:08:49,793 --> 00:08:51,241
-Daddy?
-Yeah.
218
00:08:51,275 --> 00:08:54,413
Little Tommy Tinder.
219
00:08:54,448 --> 00:08:56,206
Well...
220
00:08:58,379 --> 00:08:59,655
All right.
Let's go get shit faced.
221
00:08:59,689 --> 00:09:01,413
But you're not getting
anything either.
222
00:09:01,448 --> 00:09:03,068
So if you want to go flick
your fucking bean,
223
00:09:03,103 --> 00:09:04,275
do what you need to do.
224
00:09:04,310 --> 00:09:05,827
-Come on.
-All right.
225
00:09:05,862 --> 00:09:07,448
-Turn off the music.
-Well, considering you were
226
00:09:07,482 --> 00:09:08,827
gonna saddle up
with old Emmett Eyeliner,
227
00:09:08,862 --> 00:09:10,586
I'm not sure
how I should feel about that.
228
00:09:10,620 --> 00:09:12,448
Well, I don't work with them
Emmett Eyeliner, do I?
229
00:09:12,482 --> 00:09:14,103
Well, I am better looking in
that douche, though, right?
230
00:09:14,137 --> 00:09:15,482
Do you want to fucking die?
231
00:09:15,517 --> 00:09:17,206
Get your fucking grubby shoes
off the counter.
232
00:09:17,241 --> 00:09:20,517
Kill the music
before I change my mind.
233
00:09:20,551 --> 00:09:22,724
-Should I meet you there or?
-No, We're going to walk.
234
00:09:22,758 --> 00:09:27,275
-Well, it's fucking snowing out.
-Oh, my God. That's so scary!
235
00:09:27,310 --> 00:09:29,241
Come on.
Get those chicken legs out.
236
00:09:29,275 --> 00:09:31,344
Let's go for a walk.
I got to bring this to Lahna.
237
00:09:31,379 --> 00:09:33,310
ROBBIE: Why? They close at 6:00.
They're not going to be open.
238
00:09:33,344 --> 00:09:34,793
No, they'll still be there.
239
00:09:34,827 --> 00:09:36,827
They're having a little
Christmas Eve Fuckfest.
240
00:09:36,862 --> 00:09:38,413
What the hell, Why?
241
00:09:38,448 --> 00:09:40,137
TORI: You don't want to fuck
in a toy store?
242
00:09:40,172 --> 00:09:42,310
No. Well, mm, maybe. I mean...
243
00:09:42,344 --> 00:09:43,827
Sounds like you don't want
to fuck in a toy store.
244
00:09:43,862 --> 00:09:46,172
It's just kind of weird.
Like, I feel sorry for the kid
245
00:09:46,206 --> 00:09:48,137
that's going to go in tomorrow,
buy a teddy bear covered
246
00:09:48,172 --> 00:09:49,586
-in fucking cum.
-Oh, my God.
247
00:09:49,620 --> 00:09:51,344
We're going to scar him.
That poor child.
248
00:09:51,379 --> 00:09:53,724
Come on. Lock up behind you.
249
00:10:00,620 --> 00:10:02,068
ROBBIE:
We could have taken my car.
250
00:10:02,103 --> 00:10:03,413
Would have been a smart option.
251
00:10:03,448 --> 00:10:05,413
Do you want to keep
keep complaining?
252
00:10:05,448 --> 00:10:07,103
Or do you want to just walk
in silence?
253
00:10:07,137 --> 00:10:08,551
-What do you want to do?
-You're the one who was
254
00:10:08,586 --> 00:10:10,586
complaining all day about
fucking Christmas this,
255
00:10:10,620 --> 00:10:12,034
Christmas that, oh, I fucking
hate Christmas.
256
00:10:12,068 --> 00:10:13,689
Well, Christmas fucking sucks.
257
00:10:13,724 --> 00:10:16,241
Do you not agree that there's
no good fucking Christmas music,
258
00:10:16,275 --> 00:10:18,517
-no good Christmas movies.
-Bad Religion had
259
00:10:18,551 --> 00:10:20,655
-a great Christmas album.
-Just fucking get it over with.
260
00:10:20,689 --> 00:10:22,586
-Eh.
-It was good.
261
00:10:22,620 --> 00:10:25,482
There aren't many albums
that give me that spirit
262
00:10:25,517 --> 00:10:26,827
of fucking Christmas.
263
00:10:26,862 --> 00:10:28,655
Well, Bad fuckin' Religion,
ain't it, buddy.
264
00:10:28,689 --> 00:10:30,310
Give me that.
265
00:10:30,344 --> 00:10:36,137
I would go as far to say
there's like fucking two --
266
00:10:36,172 --> 00:10:38,034
two Christmas songs
that are good,
267
00:10:38,068 --> 00:10:41,517
and that's if you don't count,
if and only if, you don't count
268
00:10:41,551 --> 00:10:43,551
fucking Crypt Keeper
"Christmas Rap."
269
00:10:43,586 --> 00:10:45,103
Okay, love
"Tales From the Crypt."
270
00:10:45,137 --> 00:10:47,103
That song sucks the fucking shit
out of my ass.
271
00:10:47,137 --> 00:10:50,689
This is coming from a guy
who jizzes his fucking pants
272
00:10:50,724 --> 00:10:54,827
every single time he hears
Buster Poindexter's cover of
273
00:10:54,862 --> 00:10:56,793
"Zat You, Santa Claus?"
274
00:10:56,827 --> 00:10:58,689
ROBBIE: No, no, no, no, no, no.
I don't like that cover.
275
00:10:58,724 --> 00:11:00,310
I like the version
with the commentary
276
00:11:00,344 --> 00:11:02,172
from Beavis and Butthead.
277
00:11:02,206 --> 00:11:04,344
-Okay.
-Okay.
278
00:11:04,379 --> 00:11:06,068
"Merry Christmas", Ramones,
then.
279
00:11:06,103 --> 00:11:08,344
That's mine. What's your big
fucking runner up?
280
00:11:08,379 --> 00:11:13,379
Uh, sorry to say,
but "Merry Christmas", Ramones,
281
00:11:13,413 --> 00:11:15,172
that's a fucking runner up.
282
00:11:15,206 --> 00:11:16,344
-Yeah.
-Fuck you.
283
00:11:16,379 --> 00:11:17,620
-First place --
-Fuck you.
284
00:11:17,655 --> 00:11:19,275
First place is our lord
and savior Lemmy
285
00:11:19,310 --> 00:11:21,517
with "Run Rudolph Run."
Oh, it's magic!
286
00:11:21,551 --> 00:11:23,206
ROBBIE: Okay.
It's not like it's Motorhead.
287
00:11:23,241 --> 00:11:24,655
It's Lemmy with
the fucking Foo Fighters.
288
00:11:24,689 --> 00:11:26,827
-Oh, R.I.P.
-Oh, R.I.P.
289
00:11:26,862 --> 00:11:29,206
Also Lemmy is fucking Motorhead,
you idiot.
290
00:11:29,241 --> 00:11:30,275
Yeah.
291
00:11:30,310 --> 00:11:31,517
Hey!
292
00:11:31,551 --> 00:11:34,241
Lahna! [ Laughs ]
293
00:11:34,275 --> 00:11:35,689
She knows you're coming, right?
294
00:11:35,724 --> 00:11:37,620
Yeah, of course
she knows I'm fucking coming.
295
00:11:37,655 --> 00:11:39,172
Oh.
296
00:11:39,206 --> 00:11:41,068
-Hey, bitch.
-Hi!
297
00:11:41,103 --> 00:11:42,517
Mwah! You look so good.
298
00:11:42,551 --> 00:11:43,551
-Thank you.
-Hey, gorgeous.
299
00:11:43,586 --> 00:11:45,275
-Mwah.
-Mwah.
300
00:11:45,310 --> 00:11:48,655
I brought you and Jay
a little something, something.
301
00:11:48,689 --> 00:11:50,275
Ooh, I got you this.
302
00:11:50,310 --> 00:11:51,517
Oh, my God. I love you so much.
303
00:11:51,551 --> 00:11:53,379
-I missed you.
-I missed you, too.
304
00:11:53,413 --> 00:11:54,724
TORI: Where's Jay?
305
00:11:54,758 --> 00:11:56,758
He's in the back, freshening up.
306
00:11:56,793 --> 00:11:59,517
You know, he just gets
a little musty.
307
00:11:59,551 --> 00:12:01,586
He gets a little musty?
308
00:12:01,620 --> 00:12:03,172
-You got a lot going on.
-Musty she says.
309
00:12:03,206 --> 00:12:04,724
LAHNA: Yeah, you know
all about that, right?
310
00:12:04,758 --> 00:12:05,793
-No, I do.
-You know all about that?
311
00:12:05,827 --> 00:12:07,413
-Baby.
-Yeah.
312
00:12:07,448 --> 00:12:08,620
You know all about
a little musty must?
313
00:12:08,655 --> 00:12:10,310
I got a stinky dick.
314
00:12:10,344 --> 00:12:12,551
-[ Laughs ] That's so fucked up.
-Cute, right?
315
00:12:12,586 --> 00:12:14,034
-Bitch.
-Yeah?
316
00:12:14,068 --> 00:12:15,655
You already cracked this open.
317
00:12:15,689 --> 00:12:18,379
We may have had, like,
like a couple of drinks.
318
00:12:18,413 --> 00:12:21,724
This is the nicest thing
anybody's ever done for me.
319
00:12:21,758 --> 00:12:24,034
I know. I know. It's very nice.
And listen.
320
00:12:24,068 --> 00:12:25,689
Because we love you.
we didn't buy it for you.
321
00:12:25,724 --> 00:12:27,827
We're giving it to you.
322
00:12:27,862 --> 00:12:30,413
-Well, merry fucking Christmas.
-Merry fucking Christmas.
323
00:12:30,448 --> 00:12:33,310
-Baby!
-On it. Jesus Christ!
324
00:12:33,344 --> 00:12:34,517
-Hey!
-This motherfucker.
325
00:12:34,551 --> 00:12:35,758
I haven't seen you in so long.
326
00:12:35,793 --> 00:12:37,448
-How are you?
-Oh, yeah. Right?
327
00:12:37,482 --> 00:12:39,103
-How are you?
-Hey, bro.
328
00:12:39,137 --> 00:12:40,448
-Hey, buddy. Merry Christmas.
-Merry Christmas.
329
00:12:40,482 --> 00:12:42,068
-You look good.
-Thank you.
330
00:12:42,103 --> 00:12:43,620
-Yeah, you do.
-I've been doing nothing but
331
00:12:43,655 --> 00:12:46,275
selling toys and fucking
living the clean life.
332
00:12:46,310 --> 00:12:48,034
-Keep up.
-[ Sniffs ]
333
00:12:48,068 --> 00:12:51,172
Oh! Um, what's up with you two?
What's going on here?
334
00:12:51,206 --> 00:12:53,137
-Uh, just grabbing a drink.
-Just grabbing a drink.
335
00:12:53,172 --> 00:12:54,620
I had to talk her out
of some Tinder trash.
336
00:12:54,655 --> 00:12:56,103
You didn't talk me
out of anything.
337
00:12:56,137 --> 00:12:57,379
What was his name?
Emmett -- Emmett --
338
00:12:57,413 --> 00:12:58,724
-We don't have to talk --
-Emmett! Oh, shit!
339
00:12:58,758 --> 00:13:00,275
TORI: No, I think
we're ignoring that.
340
00:13:00,310 --> 00:13:01,551
Motherfuckin' four-kid Emmett.
Four kid Emmett?
341
00:13:01,586 --> 00:13:03,137
-No.
-Nearly five kid Emmett.
342
00:13:03,172 --> 00:13:04,413
Four kid Emmett. Why does
everybody know Emmett
343
00:13:04,448 --> 00:13:06,103
-except for me?
-He's got four kids.
344
00:13:06,137 --> 00:13:08,034
-All right. Well, cheers. Yeah.
-No, no, no.
345
00:13:08,068 --> 00:13:09,620
What was the song? What was
the song? It was...
346
00:13:09,655 --> 00:13:11,172
We don't need the song.
347
00:13:11,206 --> 00:13:14,034
♪ And her heart
whispers in my head ♪
348
00:13:14,068 --> 00:13:15,586
-Alright, fuckers.
-Go for it, tap on in.
349
00:13:15,620 --> 00:13:16,827
♪ Because she's half dead
350
00:13:16,862 --> 00:13:18,689
-Tori!
-No, no, no, no.
351
00:13:18,724 --> 00:13:20,413
Come back, come back,
come back, come back.
352
00:13:20,448 --> 00:13:21,793
-Come back, come back.
-Alright, you guys, I'm back.
353
00:13:21,827 --> 00:13:23,344
-It's a catchy song.
-It's a good song.
354
00:13:23,379 --> 00:13:24,413
It's the feel good hit
of the winter.
355
00:13:24,448 --> 00:13:25,551
-Okay, cheers.
-Cheers.
356
00:13:25,586 --> 00:13:27,241
-To Christmas!
-To Christmas!
357
00:13:27,275 --> 00:13:29,103
-Bah humbug.
-Bah humbug.
358
00:13:29,137 --> 00:13:30,310
SANTA: Ho, ho, ho.
359
00:13:30,344 --> 00:13:32,172
Come sit on Santa's lap
360
00:13:32,206 --> 00:13:34,517
and tell him what you
want for Christmas.
361
00:13:34,551 --> 00:13:36,206
-Ugh!
-[ Laughs ]
362
00:13:36,241 --> 00:13:39,517
-I fucking hate that.
-No, they all get recalled.
363
00:13:39,551 --> 00:13:41,620
Priest said that to me
when I was a young boy.
364
00:13:41,655 --> 00:13:44,724
Are you okay?
You're not fucking okay.
365
00:13:44,758 --> 00:13:46,482
-No, I'm not well.
-It's so bad.
366
00:13:46,517 --> 00:13:48,379
Thank God they're taking it out
on Friday.
367
00:13:48,413 --> 00:13:50,448
Has he ever come to life
while you guys were fucking?
368
00:13:50,482 --> 00:13:51,758
Oh, he joins.
369
00:13:51,793 --> 00:13:53,206
-Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
370
00:13:53,241 --> 00:13:54,758
-He's anatomical.
-Oh, really?
371
00:13:54,793 --> 00:13:56,586
-Big bad Santa.
-Okay.
372
00:13:56,620 --> 00:13:59,103
-Big Santa.
-But I am hoping that they
373
00:13:59,137 --> 00:14:00,172
leave behind this aspect of it.
374
00:14:00,206 --> 00:14:01,275
TORI: What?
375
00:14:01,310 --> 00:14:02,551
[ Whirring ]
376
00:14:02,586 --> 00:14:06,724
-Oh!
-Oh, baby, it's so romantic!
377
00:14:06,758 --> 00:14:09,206
Okay, we're getting the fuck
out of here.
378
00:14:09,241 --> 00:14:10,379
This is too much
Christmas for me.
379
00:14:10,413 --> 00:14:12,827
-Oh, no, no.
-No, no, no, stay, stay.
380
00:14:12,862 --> 00:14:16,793
Stop! I fuckin' -- that's a lot.
That is a lot.
381
00:14:16,827 --> 00:14:19,620
It's really excessive. We're
gonna have one drink and go.
382
00:14:19,655 --> 00:14:21,310
-All right. Yeah, fine.
-Fine.
383
00:14:21,344 --> 00:14:23,068
JAY: We could just --
You guys hang out.
384
00:14:23,103 --> 00:14:24,689
-We could have some more drinks.
-We're not going to hang out.
385
00:14:24,724 --> 00:14:26,241
-The four of us.
-We're not gonna hang out.
386
00:14:26,275 --> 00:14:27,793
-Santa, the anatomical Santa.
-We're good.
387
00:14:27,827 --> 00:14:29,241
-Okay, alright.
-Alright.
388
00:14:29,275 --> 00:14:30,620
-Easy, tiger.
-Alright.
389
00:14:30,655 --> 00:14:32,206
-Cheers.
-Cheers.
390
00:14:32,241 --> 00:14:34,517
Fuck. Merry Christmas
to a fuckin' day off.
391
00:14:34,551 --> 00:14:36,379
-Little bit of flavor in there.
-Yeah.
392
00:14:36,413 --> 00:14:38,551
-Mm.
-Okay, I love you.
393
00:14:38,586 --> 00:14:40,379
Get the fuck out.
I want to fuck my husband.
394
00:14:40,413 --> 00:14:41,689
-Mwah.
-Merry Christmas.
395
00:14:41,724 --> 00:14:42,827
-Merry Christmas.
-Bye.
396
00:14:42,862 --> 00:14:44,172
-See you.
-See you.
397
00:14:44,206 --> 00:14:45,275
-See ya, bud.
-All right. We're going.
398
00:14:45,310 --> 00:14:46,206
-Goodbye.
-See ya.
399
00:14:46,241 --> 00:14:49,793
♪ Oh, she's whispering
in my head ♪
400
00:14:49,827 --> 00:14:51,758
Fucking hate you guys!
401
00:14:51,793 --> 00:14:53,689
♪ I'm half deaf for you
402
00:14:53,724 --> 00:14:56,689
I'm stealing your candy.
Thank you.
403
00:14:56,724 --> 00:14:58,689
-Come on, let's go.
-Ugh!
404
00:14:58,724 --> 00:15:00,241
[ Laughs ] Let's fucking go.
405
00:15:00,275 --> 00:15:01,655
-God!
-Come on!
406
00:15:01,689 --> 00:15:03,758
Coming. I'm coming.
407
00:15:03,793 --> 00:15:08,103
SANTA: Ho, ho, ho.
Merry Christmas.
408
00:15:13,413 --> 00:15:15,620
Sowell Robotic Products'
new animatronic
409
00:15:15,655 --> 00:15:17,655
state of the art Santa Claus
featured at our own
410
00:15:17,689 --> 00:15:19,793
T.W. Bonkers is now the subject
of an international recall.
411
00:15:19,827 --> 00:15:21,655
There have been reports that
some of the Santa units
412
00:15:21,689 --> 00:15:24,034
are reverting to their old
Defense Department firmware.
413
00:15:24,068 --> 00:15:26,689
Thus far, most of the reports
have been of harmless pranks.
414
00:15:26,724 --> 00:15:29,482
Fuck no! [ Laughs ]
415
00:15:29,517 --> 00:15:31,068
Larry, can you turn
that shit off?
416
00:15:31,103 --> 00:15:32,551
-That's so depressing.
-Yeah.
417
00:15:32,586 --> 00:15:34,034
-[ Laughs ]
-You guys want one more
418
00:15:34,068 --> 00:15:35,172
to close it out?
419
00:15:35,206 --> 00:15:36,689
Yeah, we will.
420
00:15:36,724 --> 00:15:38,551
Can we get another round
and a shot of whiskey, please?
421
00:15:38,586 --> 00:15:40,482
You're going to chase a shot
of whiskey with more whiskey?
422
00:15:40,517 --> 00:15:42,482
I am. It's a holiday.
That's what you do.
423
00:15:42,517 --> 00:15:44,379
-This is true.
-Thank you.
424
00:15:44,413 --> 00:15:47,172
Is this, uh, together?
Or separate?
425
00:15:47,206 --> 00:15:49,655
Togeth-- Together.
426
00:15:49,689 --> 00:15:51,137
It's on one bill. I got it.
427
00:15:51,172 --> 00:15:52,689
-Oh, la di da.
-It's part of your bonus.
428
00:15:52,724 --> 00:15:55,344
Although I am a little
disappointed.
429
00:15:55,379 --> 00:15:57,655
He didn't even offer
to pay for the fuckin' last --
430
00:15:57,689 --> 00:15:59,310
Excuse me, this is not
a date, remember?
431
00:15:59,344 --> 00:16:01,482
Yeah, no, I fuckin'
remember now.
432
00:16:01,517 --> 00:16:03,034
Happy I didn't think otherwise.
433
00:16:03,068 --> 00:16:04,137
-Fun hangout
-Yeah.
434
00:16:04,172 --> 00:16:05,586
Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool.
435
00:16:05,620 --> 00:16:08,103
You think would have
picked up the tab for, uh,
436
00:16:08,137 --> 00:16:11,103
Doctor fuckin' Emmett Eyeliner.
437
00:16:11,137 --> 00:16:12,689
Depends on how the night went.
438
00:16:12,724 --> 00:16:14,827
Probably would have forgotten
his wallet or something.
439
00:16:14,862 --> 00:16:17,655
Mnh-mnh. Did this dude fuck
your mom or something?
440
00:16:17,689 --> 00:16:20,310
Why the fuck -- every single
time you talk about him,
441
00:16:20,344 --> 00:16:21,827
I'm like so close
to forgetting him,
442
00:16:21,862 --> 00:16:23,275
and then you bring him up again.
443
00:16:23,310 --> 00:16:24,758
I'm just like, just like,
it baffles me
444
00:16:24,793 --> 00:16:26,206
that you were going to let him,
like, you know,
445
00:16:26,241 --> 00:16:27,655
-stick his penis just...
-Taint me?
446
00:16:27,689 --> 00:16:29,206
-...inside you.
-He's gonna fuckin' taint me?
447
00:16:29,241 --> 00:16:30,586
-He was gonna taint you.
-Yeah, I'm horny,
448
00:16:30,620 --> 00:16:32,379
and it's a holiday.
What am I supposed to do?
449
00:16:32,413 --> 00:16:34,827
Do you want to go through --
Larry, do you want to go through
450
00:16:34,862 --> 00:16:36,517
Robbie's list of prize catches?
451
00:16:36,551 --> 00:16:38,068
-Not again.
-'Cause fuckin' --
452
00:16:38,103 --> 00:16:39,586
no, remember this?
Remember rotten Rebecca?
453
00:16:39,620 --> 00:16:41,068
The one that smelled like
a fucking fish market.
454
00:16:41,103 --> 00:16:42,793
-Oh, God.
-She was great.
455
00:16:42,827 --> 00:16:44,344
Yeah, had to walk out
of the room every time...
456
00:16:44,379 --> 00:16:46,103
-Rotten Rebecca.
-...every time she fucking
457
00:16:46,137 --> 00:16:47,172
walked in one.
458
00:16:47,206 --> 00:16:48,517
Oh, my God.
459
00:16:48,551 --> 00:16:50,172
That honestly made me
want to throw up.
460
00:16:50,206 --> 00:16:51,310
That was so gross.
461
00:16:51,344 --> 00:16:52,482
Who else? Come on.
462
00:16:52,517 --> 00:16:54,103
Do you want to talk about Tina?
463
00:16:54,137 --> 00:16:56,620
-Tina?
-Googly eyed Tina?
464
00:16:56,655 --> 00:16:58,344
Do you want me to keep going?
That's my point.
465
00:16:58,379 --> 00:16:59,827
-That was a condition.
-Do you want me to keep going?
466
00:16:59,862 --> 00:17:01,551
-She couldn't help it.
-Okay.
467
00:17:01,586 --> 00:17:04,103
-She's a beautiful woman.
-Can you shut the fuck up?
468
00:17:04,137 --> 00:17:05,310
JAY: Okay, babe, no, seriously.
469
00:17:05,344 --> 00:17:07,172
He's been her employee
for years.
470
00:17:07,206 --> 00:17:09,103
One, I think
it's illegal if they fuck.
471
00:17:09,137 --> 00:17:11,724
And two, he'll never
close the deal.
472
00:17:11,758 --> 00:17:14,551
[ Warbling ]
473
00:17:14,586 --> 00:17:16,758
LAHNA: She had that glow
in her eyes.
474
00:17:16,793 --> 00:17:18,724
JAY: Okay, okay, fine.
No, she fucking might have.
475
00:17:18,758 --> 00:17:20,206
But he won't even come close to
closing the deal.
476
00:17:20,241 --> 00:17:21,620
-What?
-Not at all.
477
00:17:21,655 --> 00:17:24,482
LAHNA: 1,000 percent
they're fucking tonight.
478
00:17:24,517 --> 00:17:27,137
-Fuck that.
-Unless Robbie's dick
479
00:17:27,172 --> 00:17:30,517
gets chopped up,
they're gonna fuck tonight.
480
00:17:30,551 --> 00:17:32,827
JAY: What are you fuck--
Fuck that. Okay. All right.
481
00:17:32,862 --> 00:17:34,413
-You want him bet?
-Yeah.
482
00:17:34,448 --> 00:17:35,655
[ Footsteps thudding ]
483
00:17:35,689 --> 00:17:37,241
JAY: Okay, great, great,
great, great.
484
00:17:37,275 --> 00:17:38,517
Alright, how much you fucking
want to bet then?
485
00:17:38,551 --> 00:17:39,793
Are you ever going
to settle down,
486
00:17:39,827 --> 00:17:41,517
you know, chill the fuck out.
487
00:17:41,551 --> 00:17:42,517
Are you?
488
00:17:42,551 --> 00:17:44,137
-Yeah.
-Yeah?
489
00:17:44,172 --> 00:17:45,793
-Hopefully.
-Oh, okay, great.
490
00:17:45,827 --> 00:17:47,655
Well, maybe I'll fucking settle
down when I can find a man
491
00:17:47,689 --> 00:17:49,241
that can keep up with me.
492
00:17:49,275 --> 00:17:51,206
Do you know how hard it
is being in a world
493
00:17:51,241 --> 00:17:54,689
surrounded by so many boys
that can't handle a woman
494
00:17:54,724 --> 00:17:57,034
who can out drink, out earn
and out fuck them,
495
00:17:57,068 --> 00:17:58,275
for the love of God?
496
00:17:58,310 --> 00:18:01,137
Do you know
how many men cannot fuck?
497
00:18:01,172 --> 00:18:03,068
-There's a few.
-No.
498
00:18:03,103 --> 00:18:04,482
-And some can.
-None of them know
499
00:18:04,517 --> 00:18:06,068
how to eat pussy.
I'll tell you that right now.
500
00:18:06,103 --> 00:18:07,379
-See, I beg to differ.
-No.
501
00:18:07,413 --> 00:18:09,206
In fact, I would argue
there are one,
502
00:18:09,241 --> 00:18:11,068
maybe two people
in this general vicinity
503
00:18:11,103 --> 00:18:13,724
who can do it with the ferocity
of a fucking tyrannosaurus
504
00:18:13,758 --> 00:18:17,034
-No, No.
-[ Growling ]
505
00:18:17,068 --> 00:18:18,724
-Larry.
-Larry.
506
00:18:18,758 --> 00:18:20,689
Can you please,
for the love of God,
507
00:18:20,724 --> 00:18:22,620
give me one more round.
508
00:18:22,655 --> 00:18:24,275
-[ Footsteps thudding ]
-LAHNA: I'll be you
509
00:18:24,310 --> 00:18:29,620
that if they fuck,
I'll make you a steak dinner.
510
00:18:29,655 --> 00:18:31,275
-Really?
-Yeah.
511
00:18:31,310 --> 00:18:34,413
Wearing nothing but an apron.
512
00:18:34,448 --> 00:18:37,413
[ Footsteps thudding ]
513
00:18:37,448 --> 00:18:39,137
JAY: If I lose?
514
00:18:39,172 --> 00:18:42,137
LAHNA: Oh, when you lose,
515
00:18:42,172 --> 00:18:44,793
you have to eat my
ass out on this throne.
516
00:18:44,827 --> 00:18:47,172
JAY: Well, why wait? Why don't
I eat it fuckin' right now?
517
00:18:47,206 --> 00:18:48,655
Daddy's hungry.
518
00:18:48,689 --> 00:18:51,034
Ah! Daddy!
519
00:18:51,068 --> 00:18:53,551
[ Gasps ] Oh!
520
00:18:53,586 --> 00:18:55,793
I can trace it back
every fucking time.
521
00:18:55,827 --> 00:18:59,034
The second they cut their hair,
they cut their worst record!
522
00:18:59,068 --> 00:19:02,103
Ah, it's just such
an absurd claim.
523
00:19:02,137 --> 00:19:05,517
It isn't -- It's a fucking
absurdly correct claim.
524
00:19:05,551 --> 00:19:07,827
-[ Chuckles ]
-Is what it is. Okay?
525
00:19:07,862 --> 00:19:09,758
Do you remember that fucking
study I showed you?
526
00:19:09,793 --> 00:19:12,379
-Oh, yeah. The scientist one.
-Yes, the fuckin' scientist one.
527
00:19:12,413 --> 00:19:15,034
The second that they cut
the hair of
528
00:19:15,068 --> 00:19:17,379
a Native American person,
they lost, like,
529
00:19:17,413 --> 00:19:19,172
-all sense of intuition.
-Okay.
530
00:19:19,206 --> 00:19:20,620
-Like fucking all of it.
-First off.
531
00:19:20,655 --> 00:19:22,482
-And it's really scary.
-First off.
532
00:19:22,517 --> 00:19:25,310
Whatever bullshit fucking blog
you pulled that study off --
533
00:19:25,344 --> 00:19:27,034
-A government study, dude.
-Government.
534
00:19:27,068 --> 00:19:28,551
Has about as much merit as
the fucking Reddit thread.
535
00:19:28,586 --> 00:19:30,413
-Okay.
-Second off, second off,
536
00:19:30,448 --> 00:19:32,827
that has absolutely zero
fucking merit when it comes to
537
00:19:32,862 --> 00:19:35,344
talking about somebody's actual
musical ability.
538
00:19:35,379 --> 00:19:37,344
Okay. I'm going to go through
the fucking list.
539
00:19:37,379 --> 00:19:38,655
-Okay, do it.
-Metallica.
540
00:19:38,689 --> 00:19:40,310
-Yeah?
-Yeah.
541
00:19:40,344 --> 00:19:42,724
They cut their hair,
the fuckers release "Load."
542
00:19:42,758 --> 00:19:46,413
Yeah? Soundgarden.
Cornell cuts his hair off.
543
00:19:46,448 --> 00:19:49,517
Opts for the Spencers Gift tips
with the frosted spikes,
544
00:19:49,551 --> 00:19:51,586
and then the motherfuckers
release "Superunknown"!
545
00:19:51,620 --> 00:19:54,551
-What is that?!
-Boom! Boom right there, bitch!
546
00:19:54,586 --> 00:19:56,137
Voids your argument?
Do you know why?
547
00:19:56,172 --> 00:19:59,827
-Why? Tell me why.
-'Cause "Superunknown",
548
00:19:59,862 --> 00:20:01,482
-peak Soundgarden.
-Oh, fuckin' --
549
00:20:01,517 --> 00:20:03,655
-Are you kidding me?
-Not one bad track on the album.
550
00:20:03,689 --> 00:20:05,379
TORI: Are you actually going to
stop with the fucking
551
00:20:05,413 --> 00:20:07,068
Jesus Christ pose right now?
552
00:20:07,103 --> 00:20:08,655
What the fuck?!
Are you serious?!
553
00:20:08,689 --> 00:20:10,724
-Are you fuckin' --
-[ Groans ]
554
00:20:10,758 --> 00:20:13,103
Are you fucking kidding me?
[ Laughs ]
555
00:20:13,137 --> 00:20:16,379
That's so fuckin' dumb,
so fuckin' dumb.
556
00:20:16,413 --> 00:20:18,034
-[ Groans ]
-Let me guess.
557
00:20:18,068 --> 00:20:20,344
You prefer you prefer, uh,
you prefer Van Hagar?
558
00:20:20,379 --> 00:20:24,413
"Prefer" is a strong word.
They lost zero appeal
559
00:20:24,448 --> 00:20:25,827
when Diamond Dave ducked out.
560
00:20:25,862 --> 00:20:28,448
-Oh! Really?
-Yes, really.
561
00:20:28,482 --> 00:20:31,137
Because it's around that time
that they got
562
00:20:31,172 --> 00:20:33,758
rid of their guitar god,
and then replaced him
563
00:20:33,793 --> 00:20:36,827
with a synth loving clone
of said guitar god.
564
00:20:36,862 --> 00:20:39,137
Alright, get your ass
off the bar, Robbie.
565
00:20:39,172 --> 00:20:40,793
-Oh.
-Hate to break up the party.
566
00:20:40,827 --> 00:20:42,793
I got four little
diaper pissers at home.
567
00:20:42,827 --> 00:20:44,655
They're going to wake me
up in four hours. Let's --
568
00:20:44,689 --> 00:20:46,379
Yes, thank you.
569
00:20:46,413 --> 00:20:48,517
I don't want to listen to this
fucking guy anyway.
570
00:20:48,551 --> 00:20:50,310
-Sweet baby. Jesus.
-Mm, got my card.
571
00:20:50,344 --> 00:20:53,413
Slow your roll, Larry.
Got two more coming my way.
572
00:20:53,448 --> 00:20:56,034
-I'll pour you one.
-Hands behind your back.
573
00:20:56,068 --> 00:20:58,482
-Hands behind my back?
-You're lucky like you.
574
00:20:58,517 --> 00:21:00,620
Yeah, and you're lucky I don't
have health inspector
575
00:21:00,655 --> 00:21:01,689
shut this shit hole down.
576
00:21:01,724 --> 00:21:03,689
[ Chuckles ]
577
00:21:03,724 --> 00:21:04,793
He's right.
578
00:21:04,827 --> 00:21:06,413
Is he right?
579
00:21:06,448 --> 00:21:10,448
-And pour Tori and her new beau.
-Oh, thanks, man.
580
00:21:10,482 --> 00:21:14,103
One and one for yourself, Larry.
581
00:21:14,137 --> 00:21:16,413
I didn't know
you two were a thing.
582
00:21:16,448 --> 00:21:17,551
-We're not.
-Yet.
583
00:21:17,586 --> 00:21:19,620
Get fucked.
584
00:21:22,275 --> 00:21:23,551
[ Footsteps thudding ]
585
00:21:23,586 --> 00:21:25,413
LAHNA: Ah, yeah!
586
00:21:27,413 --> 00:21:29,448
[ Lahna gasping, moaning ]
587
00:21:29,482 --> 00:21:33,034
[ Footsteps thudding ]
588
00:21:35,241 --> 00:21:39,379
[ Lahna gasping, moaning ]
589
00:21:39,413 --> 00:21:41,793
[ Footsteps thudding ]
590
00:21:49,586 --> 00:21:51,172
[ Whirring ]
591
00:21:51,206 --> 00:21:54,034
MONROE: The wife's back
is with her family.
592
00:21:58,068 --> 00:22:02,068
So that's why I'm spending
Christmas alone.
593
00:22:02,103 --> 00:22:04,413
Unless you count
that fucking mutt
594
00:22:04,448 --> 00:22:05,793
that won't keep its trap shut.
595
00:22:05,827 --> 00:22:07,517
Why do you have a fucking
dog then, man?
596
00:22:07,551 --> 00:22:09,482
You think I wanted that thing?
597
00:22:09,517 --> 00:22:12,275
-That's all Donna.
-Okay.
598
00:22:12,310 --> 00:22:14,758
That little son of a whore
is like an angel around her.
599
00:22:14,793 --> 00:22:17,827
But with me, just me,
it won't shut the fuck up
600
00:22:17,862 --> 00:22:20,379
because I won't spoil him,
like Donna does.
601
00:22:20,413 --> 00:22:22,068
Just like with her old man.
602
00:22:22,103 --> 00:22:24,103
Yeah, I think -- I think it
sounds like the dog just
603
00:22:24,137 --> 00:22:26,517
probably needs, like, some
lovin' from Daddy Monroe.
604
00:22:26,551 --> 00:22:28,482
-Like.
-Yeah, yeah, yeah.
605
00:22:28,517 --> 00:22:31,448
I think the little bastard needs
his balls clipped.
606
00:22:31,482 --> 00:22:33,413
-Hey, man.
-Sure.
607
00:22:33,448 --> 00:22:35,172
Donna had me get
my balls clipped
608
00:22:35,206 --> 00:22:39,103
-two days after Henry was born.
-Jesus fucking Christ.
609
00:22:39,137 --> 00:22:44,206
You're gonna wake up
a sleeping, Junior.
610
00:22:44,241 --> 00:22:47,206
Well, uh, here,
let's have a toast.
611
00:22:47,241 --> 00:22:49,724
I think you've had enough
there, Supercuts.
612
00:22:49,758 --> 00:22:51,448
-[ Laughs ]
-Cheers.
613
00:22:51,482 --> 00:22:54,724
-[ Glasses clink ]
-Cheers.
614
00:22:56,517 --> 00:23:00,206
Here, let me, uh, cover
what these kids are drinking.
615
00:23:00,241 --> 00:23:03,379
-Oh, no, no, that's --
-No, hey, hey, hey, hey.
616
00:23:03,413 --> 00:23:04,793
-You...
-Thank you, Chief.
617
00:23:04,827 --> 00:23:08,482
-...keep the rest for yourself.
-Thank you.
618
00:23:08,517 --> 00:23:10,758
MONROE: Watch yourself
with that one.
619
00:23:10,793 --> 00:23:12,241
Merry Christmas, Sheriff.
620
00:23:12,275 --> 00:23:14,482
Shit, that little punk
motherfucker,
621
00:23:14,517 --> 00:23:16,413
wipe that smirk off...
622
00:23:16,448 --> 00:23:19,344
Mm. That sucked the
fucking Christmas early.
623
00:23:19,379 --> 00:23:22,068
ROBBIE: God damn, what a sad
fuckin' human being.
624
00:23:22,103 --> 00:23:25,206
LARRY: You gonna be
good to drive?
625
00:23:25,241 --> 00:23:26,758
Uh, no.
626
00:23:26,793 --> 00:23:29,206
I drove with Robbie --
I fuckin' walked with Robbie.
627
00:23:29,241 --> 00:23:30,655
If I drove you, you'd be fucked.
628
00:23:30,689 --> 00:23:32,448
So much for drinking
every guy under the table.
629
00:23:32,482 --> 00:23:36,517
Excuse me. You've got, like,
at least five pounds on me.
630
00:23:36,551 --> 00:23:38,103
Soaking wet maybe.
631
00:23:38,137 --> 00:23:39,379
LARRY: Get her home safe.
Robbie.
632
00:23:39,413 --> 00:23:41,034
What the fuck's that's
supposed to mean?
633
00:23:41,068 --> 00:23:43,068
-It's a big world out there.
-You get home safe.
634
00:23:43,103 --> 00:23:45,206
Better watch for your children.
635
00:23:45,241 --> 00:23:46,620
[ Laughs ]
636
00:23:46,655 --> 00:23:48,517
-I'm just kidding.
-Sounded so threatening.
637
00:23:48,551 --> 00:23:51,000
-Good night.
-Thank you, Larry.
638
00:23:53,551 --> 00:23:55,827
-Ugh.
-Come on.
639
00:23:55,862 --> 00:23:58,827
-[ Footsteps thudding ]
-[ Lahna moaning ]
640
00:23:58,862 --> 00:24:00,310
LAHNA: Yes!
641
00:24:01,551 --> 00:24:02,793
JAY: Oh, shit.
642
00:24:02,827 --> 00:24:04,551
LAHNA: Not yet.
643
00:24:04,586 --> 00:24:06,103
JAY: It's coming early.
644
00:24:06,137 --> 00:24:07,103
LAHNA: Hold it.
No, baby, hold it.
645
00:24:07,137 --> 00:24:09,137
Hold it! You better not!
646
00:24:09,172 --> 00:24:10,517
Fuck! You better not!
647
00:24:10,551 --> 00:24:12,413
Ah!
648
00:24:12,448 --> 00:24:14,034
[ Screams ]
649
00:24:14,068 --> 00:24:16,241
Like, what did
he arrest you for?
650
00:24:16,275 --> 00:24:18,482
It was fucking --
you were like --
651
00:24:18,517 --> 00:24:20,310
you were like pissing
on a playground.
652
00:24:20,344 --> 00:24:22,206
I didn't know the kid
was going to show up like that.
653
00:24:22,241 --> 00:24:24,034
Oh, fuck, and the kid
was his grandson.
654
00:24:24,068 --> 00:24:25,413
Yeah, I made him a man.
655
00:24:25,448 --> 00:24:27,034
That's fucked.
You took that away from him.
656
00:24:27,068 --> 00:24:28,620
-I know.
-You took it away him.
657
00:24:28,655 --> 00:24:30,517
[ Lahna screaming ]
658
00:24:30,551 --> 00:24:32,379
[ Thudding ]
659
00:24:33,068 --> 00:24:35,275
[ Screaming ]
660
00:24:39,448 --> 00:24:41,448
[ Clattering ]
661
00:24:43,310 --> 00:24:45,103
[ Panting ]
662
00:24:45,344 --> 00:24:47,172
[ Screams ]
663
00:24:47,206 --> 00:24:50,310
Somebody help!
664
00:24:50,344 --> 00:24:51,655
Do you want to keep drinking,
or...?
665
00:24:51,689 --> 00:24:54,793
I mean, yeah.
What are you thinking?
666
00:24:54,827 --> 00:24:56,551
-What am I thinking?
-Yeah.
667
00:24:57,241 --> 00:24:59,206
[ Footsteps thudding ]
668
00:25:05,482 --> 00:25:06,758
[ Lahna screams ]
669
00:25:06,793 --> 00:25:09,034
[ Thudding ]
670
00:25:09,689 --> 00:25:12,724
[ Screams ]
671
00:25:13,448 --> 00:25:16,206
You can come over
and kill that bottle with me.
672
00:25:16,241 --> 00:25:17,586
-Really?
-Yeah.
673
00:25:17,620 --> 00:25:19,068
-Are you sure?
-Yeah.
674
00:25:19,103 --> 00:25:21,034
Come kill the fucking bottle.
675
00:25:21,068 --> 00:25:23,310
I said come over for a drink,
not over for a fuck.
676
00:25:23,344 --> 00:25:26,172
[ Screams ]
677
00:25:26,655 --> 00:25:28,448
-[ Screams ]
-[ Glass shatters ]
678
00:25:28,482 --> 00:25:30,758
Well, it sounds like someone's
hankering for a little bit of --
679
00:25:30,793 --> 00:25:34,034
[ Lahna screaming ]
680
00:25:34,551 --> 00:25:36,620
-You hear that?
-Hear what?
681
00:25:36,655 --> 00:25:39,310
[ Screaming ]
682
00:25:39,344 --> 00:25:40,758
[ Thudding ]
683
00:25:43,137 --> 00:25:45,793
[ Glass shatters ]
684
00:25:46,862 --> 00:25:48,241
Yeah, dawg!
685
00:25:48,275 --> 00:25:50,482
Jay hitting that pipe.
686
00:25:50,517 --> 00:25:51,827
Yeah, he's hitting
that fucking pipe.
687
00:25:51,862 --> 00:25:53,275
Speaking of, have you seen it?
688
00:25:53,310 --> 00:25:55,137
Yeah, it's fucking fat
as fuck.
689
00:25:55,172 --> 00:25:57,172
-It's fat.
-Oh, he be gaping that shit
690
00:25:57,206 --> 00:25:58,793
for sure.
691
00:25:58,827 --> 00:26:01,206
[ Thud ]
692
00:26:01,241 --> 00:26:03,241
[ Footsteps thudding ]
693
00:26:11,379 --> 00:26:13,103
How old are you, fuckin' 12?
694
00:26:13,137 --> 00:26:14,586
I can see you smoking
that blunt from here!
695
00:26:14,620 --> 00:26:16,793
-I didn't fuckin' ask --
-I said give it to me!
696
00:26:16,827 --> 00:26:19,482
I need to salvage
this Lincoln Log...
697
00:26:19,517 --> 00:26:21,827
-No!
-...before you run it into
698
00:26:21,862 --> 00:26:23,379
the fuckin' ground.
699
00:26:23,413 --> 00:26:26,034
[ Footsteps thudding ]
700
00:26:26,517 --> 00:26:29,103
Yeah, I want to fuckin'
salvage this thing.
701
00:26:29,137 --> 00:26:30,689
What are we watching when
we get to yours,
702
00:26:30,724 --> 00:26:32,413
"A Christmas Story"?
703
00:26:32,448 --> 00:26:34,206
What is your fucking obsession
with "A Christmas Story"?
704
00:26:34,241 --> 00:26:35,586
What's your issue
with "A Christmas Story"?
705
00:26:35,620 --> 00:26:37,137
You're the one that
brought it up earlier.
706
00:26:37,172 --> 00:26:38,620
Everyone's obsessed with it.
707
00:26:38,655 --> 00:26:40,241
If you want to watch
a Bob Clark Christmas movie
708
00:26:40,275 --> 00:26:42,758
will watch
fucking "Black Christmas."
709
00:26:42,793 --> 00:26:45,275
Oh, that --
that Blumhouse joint?
710
00:26:45,310 --> 00:26:47,758
I'm just going to
drive myself home.
711
00:26:47,793 --> 00:26:49,586
No, no, no. You said we were
going to my car --
712
00:26:49,620 --> 00:26:51,758
If you want to go home
and fucking jerk off
713
00:26:51,793 --> 00:26:54,275
-to fucking Blumhouse movies --
-Get your fuckin' ass over here.
714
00:26:54,310 --> 00:26:56,344
Okay, but are you done spewing
garbage out of your fuckin'
715
00:26:56,379 --> 00:26:57,724
-whore mouth?
-Oh, there it is.
716
00:26:57,758 --> 00:26:59,551
There's your fuckin'
Rhode Island accent.
717
00:26:59,586 --> 00:27:01,793
I maybe sound like
I'm from Rhode Island,
718
00:27:01,827 --> 00:27:04,517
but at least I don't have
shit taste in movies,
719
00:27:04,551 --> 00:27:09,068
shit opinions on everything,
and drive a fucking shit car.
720
00:27:09,103 --> 00:27:10,551
ROBBIE: Uh, excuse me,
this is basically
721
00:27:10,586 --> 00:27:12,034
the same as your fucking car.
722
00:27:12,068 --> 00:27:13,206
Don't say that about her.
She's beautiful.
723
00:27:13,241 --> 00:27:14,793
-Also --
-I get her first.
724
00:27:14,827 --> 00:27:16,482
ROBBIE: My lady. My lady.
You got to get in on this side.
725
00:27:16,517 --> 00:27:18,275
You haven't got
this fucking car fixed yet?
726
00:27:18,310 --> 00:27:19,655
ROBBIE: With what you pay me,
727
00:27:19,689 --> 00:27:22,172
you think I can afford
a fucking door?
728
00:27:22,206 --> 00:27:24,034
What are you doing
with your paychecks?
729
00:27:24,068 --> 00:27:25,517
-This is --
-My minimum, my minimum --
730
00:27:25,551 --> 00:27:27,034
That's embarrassing.
731
00:27:27,068 --> 00:27:28,379
ROBBIE: My minimum
fucking wage paycheck.
732
00:27:28,413 --> 00:27:29,793
Yeah, your minimum
fucking wage paycheck.
733
00:27:29,827 --> 00:27:31,103
-Get it.
-That should be
734
00:27:31,137 --> 00:27:33,068
-a fucking priority.
-Please.
735
00:27:33,103 --> 00:27:34,551
-Wow.
-Lady.
736
00:27:34,586 --> 00:27:37,103
No, I changed my fucking mind.
I changed my mind.
737
00:27:37,137 --> 00:27:38,655
Hop in, hot shot.
We got fucking whiskey waiting.
738
00:27:38,689 --> 00:27:40,241
-Get in.
-Oh, whiskey you say?
739
00:27:40,275 --> 00:27:41,482
-Yes.
-Okay, in that case,
740
00:27:41,517 --> 00:27:43,344
-shut your fucking mouth.
-Oh, this mouth.
741
00:27:43,379 --> 00:27:45,586
This fucking whore mouth
and that devil's tongue, baby.
742
00:27:45,620 --> 00:27:49,310
-Ew, shut the -- Robbie.
-Come on, what?
743
00:27:49,344 --> 00:27:50,758
-This is a --
-Get your fuckin' ass in.
744
00:27:50,793 --> 00:27:52,827
Don't touch my fuckin' ass.
745
00:27:52,862 --> 00:27:54,655
She got a bit of a fight in her.
All right.
746
00:27:54,689 --> 00:27:58,103
-Call fucking H.R.
-I'll give you space.
747
00:27:58,137 --> 00:27:59,655
No wonder you don't
get fuckin' laid.
748
00:27:59,689 --> 00:28:01,379
[ Cans clattering ]
749
00:28:01,413 --> 00:28:03,758
-Look at this.
-What?
750
00:28:03,793 --> 00:28:05,344
No wonder you don't
get fucking laid.
751
00:28:05,379 --> 00:28:07,482
-This is disgusting.
-It adds to the flavor.
752
00:28:07,517 --> 00:28:10,758
Adds to the flavor of what?
A fucking chicken coop.
753
00:28:10,793 --> 00:28:13,482
This is fucked up.
754
00:28:13,517 --> 00:28:15,620
Some empty cans and bottles.
That's Tori Tooms' break?
755
00:28:15,655 --> 00:28:17,517
No, but it's the nail
in the fucking coffin
756
00:28:17,551 --> 00:28:19,275
because this is really bad.
757
00:28:19,310 --> 00:28:21,482
-Come on, baby.
-How do you live like this?
758
00:28:21,517 --> 00:28:23,379
-Let's cowboy up.
-Just take my car.
759
00:28:23,413 --> 00:28:26,137
-[ Engine sputters ]
-Just take my fucking card.
760
00:28:26,172 --> 00:28:28,103
You just got to be patient
with her.
761
00:28:28,137 --> 00:28:30,724
-[ Engine sputters ]
-I'm gonna lose my buzz.
762
00:28:30,758 --> 00:28:32,620
[ Laughs ]
763
00:28:32,655 --> 00:28:33,793
[ Engine starts ]
764
00:28:33,827 --> 00:28:35,620
-Hey!
-Oh, God.
765
00:28:35,655 --> 00:28:38,551
-Jesus.
-Feel that between my pants.
766
00:28:38,586 --> 00:28:40,655
We're going to have to roll this
up the hill ourselves.
767
00:28:40,689 --> 00:28:43,275
-Alright.
-Whoa. Jesus fucking Christ.
768
00:28:43,310 --> 00:28:45,586
I don't feel safe.
What are you -- okay.
769
00:28:45,620 --> 00:28:47,517
She's road worthy.
Don't even worry about it.
770
00:28:47,551 --> 00:28:50,793
TORI: Okay! Here we go.
771
00:29:11,275 --> 00:29:13,310
[ Footsteps thudding ]
772
00:29:14,586 --> 00:29:17,586
Oh, if this guy parks his
fucking Ranchero here
773
00:29:17,620 --> 00:29:19,344
one more time,
I'm going to total it,
774
00:29:19,379 --> 00:29:21,344
smash out his fucking windows.
775
00:29:21,379 --> 00:29:23,206
ROBBIE: Little harsh
to the Griswolds.
776
00:29:23,241 --> 00:29:24,827
TORI: NO, it's boozin' Benny
down at the bottom of the hill.
777
00:29:24,862 --> 00:29:26,793
-He's a fucking alcoholic.
-Boozin' Benny.
778
00:29:26,827 --> 00:29:28,482
TORI: Just pull up behind
my sister's car.
779
00:29:28,517 --> 00:29:30,103
ROBBIE: Wait.
Your sister is here?
780
00:29:30,137 --> 00:29:31,655
TORI: Do you not listen
to a fucking thing I say?
781
00:29:31,689 --> 00:29:33,551
ROBBIE: Well, I mean, I listen,
but I don't retain.
782
00:29:33,586 --> 00:29:35,586
TORI: Yeah, well, I don't want
to retain the stink
783
00:29:35,620 --> 00:29:37,758
from this fucking chicken coop,
so get out.
784
00:29:37,793 --> 00:29:39,448
Come on, let's go drink.
785
00:29:39,482 --> 00:29:42,172
-Beautiful.
-Oh, Jesus.
786
00:29:42,206 --> 00:29:44,379
-All right, my lady.
-Listen, I really can't --
787
00:29:44,413 --> 00:29:46,586
Please exit your chariot.
788
00:29:46,620 --> 00:29:48,482
I honestly -- I'm -- whoa.
789
00:29:48,517 --> 00:29:50,448
I'm too drunk for this. Jesus.
790
00:29:50,482 --> 00:29:52,620
Walk carefully, please.
Thank you.
791
00:29:52,655 --> 00:29:55,655
And treat her
with respect and dignity.
792
00:30:01,482 --> 00:30:03,241
Uh, welcome to my humble abode.
793
00:30:03,275 --> 00:30:04,827
Yeah, it's cute. It's uh --
794
00:30:04,862 --> 00:30:07,310
Charming, classy, cute.
I know.
795
00:30:07,344 --> 00:30:08,827
-Yeah, sure.
-Extravagant.
796
00:30:08,862 --> 00:30:10,448
-Rustic.
-Yeah.
797
00:30:10,482 --> 00:30:13,034
Humble. Barn-like.
798
00:30:13,068 --> 00:30:15,517
I really hope we don't take
my sister out because
799
00:30:15,551 --> 00:30:18,379
I don't want to have
to awkwardly introduce you.
800
00:30:18,413 --> 00:30:21,482
Wait, so are we drinking
alone tonight, or what?
801
00:30:21,517 --> 00:30:23,482
Robbie, do not fucking
listen to me?
802
00:30:23,517 --> 00:30:24,793
They're out cold.
803
00:30:24,827 --> 00:30:26,517
Out cold already?
It's not even midnight.
804
00:30:26,551 --> 00:30:28,758
Plus, my lame ass brother in law
doesn't even drink, so...
805
00:30:28,793 --> 00:30:32,551
Oh, that fucking cunt Mike.
Yeah?
806
00:30:32,586 --> 00:30:35,206
Mr. Hollywood? Yeah. [ Laughs ]
807
00:30:35,241 --> 00:30:38,793
[ Rock music playing ]
808
00:30:38,827 --> 00:30:43,137
These goddamn neighbors and
their fucking obnoxious lights.
809
00:30:43,172 --> 00:30:45,620
Hey, Tori.
810
00:30:45,655 --> 00:30:48,620
How much music was there
in "Unsolved Mysteries"?
811
00:30:48,655 --> 00:30:50,551
-[ Chuckles ] What?
-I mean, like, I don't --
812
00:30:50,586 --> 00:30:52,310
I don't want to --
I don't want to scare you,
813
00:30:52,344 --> 00:30:55,206
like, in your own home,
but there's like six hours
814
00:30:55,241 --> 00:30:56,827
worth of the
"Unsolved Mysteries" soundtrack?
815
00:30:56,862 --> 00:31:00,034
What the fuck is your problem
with "Unsolved Mysteries"?
816
00:31:00,068 --> 00:31:02,137
I mean, like, 30 second intro,
and then, like,
817
00:31:02,172 --> 00:31:03,620
do you need six hours?
818
00:31:03,655 --> 00:31:05,448
TORI: Have you heard it?
819
00:31:05,482 --> 00:31:08,586
No, not the entire fucking
expanse of isolated soundtrack.
820
00:31:08,620 --> 00:31:11,482
Oh, well, it is the fucking
creepiest goddamn synth pads
821
00:31:11,517 --> 00:31:14,103
you will ever hear
in your fucking life.
822
00:31:14,137 --> 00:31:16,034
-Mm-hmm. Right.
-They're amazing. Put it on.
823
00:31:16,068 --> 00:31:18,034
Yeah, okay. No, I've already got
something queued up.
824
00:31:18,068 --> 00:31:19,586
No, put it on. I want you to get
like soaked up and like
825
00:31:19,620 --> 00:31:20,793
-immersed in it.
-No, no, no, I'm good.
826
00:31:20,827 --> 00:31:22,586
-I'm good.
-It's so good. Please.
827
00:31:22,620 --> 00:31:24,413
Robbie. All right, fine. At
least I know it won't be "Load."
828
00:31:24,448 --> 00:31:27,344
-Oh, I know. I already looked.
-Oh, did you?
829
00:31:27,379 --> 00:31:31,034
Of course.
Oh, come on, Robbie.
830
00:31:31,068 --> 00:31:34,103
"Rhythms From a Cosmic Sky" is,
like, at least four times --
831
00:31:34,137 --> 00:31:35,689
Oh, you're the worst
fuckin' opinion.
832
00:31:35,724 --> 00:31:37,724
No, everybody knows that.
What are you talking about?
833
00:31:37,758 --> 00:31:39,551
Uh, it's in your collection.
834
00:31:39,586 --> 00:31:40,724
Yeah, because I'm a completist.
Thank you.
835
00:31:40,758 --> 00:31:43,137
-Not for Metallica.
-Shut up.
836
00:31:43,172 --> 00:31:46,620
Follow -- get that
fucking thing away from me.
837
00:31:46,655 --> 00:31:49,344
Okay.
838
00:31:49,379 --> 00:31:51,689
I'm weirdly turned on by this.
839
00:31:51,724 --> 00:31:53,793
-Really?
-But I need you to stop.
840
00:31:54,172 --> 00:31:56,689
[ Mechanical whirring ]
841
00:32:11,103 --> 00:32:14,344
MAN: Hey, Freddy.
Buddy, let's not open gifts.
842
00:32:14,724 --> 00:32:16,068
[ Groans ]
843
00:32:16,103 --> 00:32:17,517
There's absolutely
no fucking way
844
00:32:17,551 --> 00:32:18,793
that you actually think
that "Pet Sematary 2"
845
00:32:18,827 --> 00:32:20,517
is better than
the fucking first one!
846
00:32:20,551 --> 00:32:23,172
It's twice is good, if not
fucking three times, okay?
847
00:32:23,206 --> 00:32:26,655
It's good. Not better.
Not better. No.
848
00:32:26,689 --> 00:32:29,482
Edward Furlong,
Clancy fucking Brown.
849
00:32:29,517 --> 00:32:32,413
Who, by the way, chews up
scenery like it's a piece of
850
00:32:32,448 --> 00:32:34,724
fucking gum,
and that soundtrack.
851
00:32:34,758 --> 00:32:37,241
They've got 12 tracks
of female fronted
852
00:32:37,275 --> 00:32:41,068
fucking aggressive as hell,
early '90s grunge!
853
00:32:41,103 --> 00:32:42,827
Traci Lords has three goddamn
songs on the album,
854
00:32:42,862 --> 00:32:44,586
and they're fucking good,
they're so good.
855
00:32:44,620 --> 00:32:47,068
So, you think it's better
because Traci Lords, porn star,
856
00:32:47,103 --> 00:32:51,137
fucking superstar, big titty
Traci Lords has, what, like,
857
00:32:51,172 --> 00:32:53,172
fuckin' two tracks on the album.
858
00:32:53,206 --> 00:32:56,379
No, three, by the way,
and better story.
859
00:32:56,413 --> 00:32:59,379
Better music, obviously.
Better kills.
860
00:32:59,413 --> 00:33:03,620
Better makeup,
better fucking cast and...
861
00:33:03,655 --> 00:33:07,551
Lord Gwynn aside,
I will say, you got me there.
862
00:33:07,586 --> 00:33:10,137
But Mary Lambert, she was
finally given free reign.
863
00:33:10,172 --> 00:33:11,689
-Yeah, that was a mistake.
-Whoa, whoa, whoa.
864
00:33:11,724 --> 00:33:13,517
-What the fuck are you doing?
-What?
865
00:33:13,551 --> 00:33:16,413
What fucking Neanderthal puts
salsa on nachos
866
00:33:16,448 --> 00:33:18,379
-before they cook them?
-Me.
867
00:33:18,413 --> 00:33:21,206
MAN: Freddy, put it away
and get to bed.
868
00:33:26,448 --> 00:33:28,517
-"Elm Street."
-Part 6, "Freddy's Dead."
869
00:33:28,551 --> 00:33:30,448
-Come the fuck on.
-Yeah.
870
00:33:30,482 --> 00:33:32,655
Whoa! Hellraiser?
871
00:33:32,689 --> 00:33:34,344
-"Hell on Earth."
-Child's Play?
872
00:33:34,379 --> 00:33:36,068
-2.
-Alien?
873
00:33:36,103 --> 00:33:39,206
-"Covenant."
-Oh, no, No, no.
874
00:33:39,241 --> 00:33:41,620
-Yes.
-Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay,
875
00:33:41,655 --> 00:33:45,551
-okay, okay, okay, okay.
-Okay.
876
00:33:45,586 --> 00:33:46,827
Blair Witch?
877
00:33:46,862 --> 00:33:49,344
-Book of Motherfucking
Shadows", bitch?
878
00:33:49,379 --> 00:33:51,413
It's a fucking classic,
and you're going to watch it,
879
00:33:51,448 --> 00:33:54,551
and you'll -- stop.
You'll get it. I promise.
880
00:33:54,586 --> 00:33:56,379
Do you use your little
fucking fingers, like,
881
00:33:56,413 --> 00:33:57,793
typing on the keyboard,
and you're like,
882
00:33:57,827 --> 00:33:59,241
"Oh, like Reddit,
Reddit thread."
883
00:33:59,275 --> 00:34:00,724
-Shut the fuck up.
No, no, I am like,
884
00:34:00,758 --> 00:34:02,620
I am a gal with fucking
strong opinions.
885
00:34:02,655 --> 00:34:04,241
And now we're going to take
a shot to
886
00:34:04,275 --> 00:34:05,413
"Book of"
motherfuckin' "Shadows"
887
00:34:05,448 --> 00:34:07,379
because it's so good.
888
00:34:07,413 --> 00:34:09,310
Ah.
889
00:34:16,068 --> 00:34:18,689
[ Laughing ]
890
00:34:22,517 --> 00:34:24,724
[ Footsteps thudding ]
891
00:34:39,103 --> 00:34:40,620
Oh, fuck.
892
00:34:51,689 --> 00:34:53,241
Jesus.
893
00:34:58,586 --> 00:35:00,241
[ Laughing ]
894
00:35:02,103 --> 00:35:03,275
[ Crash ]
895
00:35:03,310 --> 00:35:05,137
MAN: Freddy, that better
not be you.
896
00:35:05,172 --> 00:35:07,793
If you're opening those gifts,
I swear to God.
897
00:35:11,482 --> 00:35:14,344
Hey, you know what happens
if I come down there.
898
00:35:23,068 --> 00:35:24,482
Oh!
899
00:35:24,517 --> 00:35:26,310
Oh, my God.
900
00:35:26,344 --> 00:35:28,448
ROBBIE: Sorry, sorry.
901
00:35:29,275 --> 00:35:31,586
[ Laughing ] Fuck it.
902
00:35:33,103 --> 00:35:37,275
MAN: Freddy?
Freddy, is that you, buddy?
903
00:35:37,310 --> 00:35:39,758
Said we weren't gonna open
or touch any of these gifts
904
00:35:39,793 --> 00:35:41,551
till Santa got --
905
00:35:46,103 --> 00:35:49,206
Get the fuck out of my house.
I'm calling the cops right now.
906
00:35:49,241 --> 00:35:51,137
Oh, shit!
907
00:35:51,172 --> 00:35:53,655
[ Thud ]
908
00:36:00,620 --> 00:36:02,482
Wait.
909
00:36:17,206 --> 00:36:19,206
Oh, king shit.
910
00:37:47,103 --> 00:37:49,275
[ Screams ]
911
00:38:04,413 --> 00:38:06,172
[ Squish ]
912
00:38:24,862 --> 00:38:26,310
[ Squelching ]
913
00:38:26,344 --> 00:38:28,310
Frankie, what was --
914
00:38:30,379 --> 00:38:31,689
[ Screams ]
915
00:38:37,758 --> 00:38:39,551
[ Screams ]
916
00:38:39,586 --> 00:38:40,793
Frankie!
917
00:38:43,137 --> 00:38:45,620
[ Laughs ]
918
00:38:45,655 --> 00:38:48,241
Oh, what the fuck?
919
00:38:48,275 --> 00:38:50,103
[ Sighs ]
920
00:38:50,137 --> 00:38:51,275
That was...
921
00:38:53,517 --> 00:38:55,241
unexpected.
922
00:38:55,275 --> 00:38:57,620
Too bad find out
about that earlier.
923
00:38:57,655 --> 00:39:00,000
Yeah, it's too bad.
924
00:39:03,068 --> 00:39:05,379
[ Sobbing ]
925
00:39:06,758 --> 00:39:08,448
[ Screams ]
926
00:39:10,620 --> 00:39:12,482
[ Screams ]
927
00:39:12,517 --> 00:39:16,482
This thing is USDA approved
organic prime man meat.
928
00:39:16,517 --> 00:39:18,586
Sorry, Are you asking me
to peg you?
929
00:39:18,620 --> 00:39:21,758
I'm not asking.
I'm inviting.
930
00:39:21,793 --> 00:39:24,241
Please, sir, may I have a hit?
931
00:39:29,517 --> 00:39:31,068
[ Panting ]
932
00:39:31,103 --> 00:39:33,310
-No! Pl-- Aah!
-[ Thud ]
933
00:39:34,517 --> 00:39:37,172
TORI: I'm gonna get some more
whiskey, flip the record.
934
00:39:37,206 --> 00:39:39,620
Come back up.
Don't fucking move.
935
00:39:47,586 --> 00:39:50,310
BOY: Mom?
936
00:39:50,620 --> 00:39:52,827
[ Mechanical whirring ]
937
00:39:52,862 --> 00:39:54,620
Mommy?
938
00:39:54,655 --> 00:39:56,620
You okay?
939
00:40:03,655 --> 00:40:05,758
Santa?
940
00:40:05,793 --> 00:40:07,586
Where's Mommy?
941
00:40:12,068 --> 00:40:15,103
Did you bring me
any good presents?
942
00:40:15,137 --> 00:40:16,758
You did!
943
00:40:33,620 --> 00:40:36,551
[ Heavy rock music plays ]
944
00:40:39,344 --> 00:40:42,275
[ Mechanical whirring,
footsteps thudding ]
945
00:40:56,275 --> 00:40:58,551
Oh. Fuck, fuck!
946
00:40:58,586 --> 00:41:00,724
Fuck me.
947
00:41:00,758 --> 00:41:02,517
Damn it.
948
00:41:04,172 --> 00:41:05,793
Jesus.
949
00:41:08,689 --> 00:41:10,482
That's fucked.
950
00:41:26,103 --> 00:41:29,551
Not stupid clothes again.
951
00:41:35,379 --> 00:41:37,413
Why are you so bloody?
952
00:41:38,551 --> 00:41:40,482
Mommy?
953
00:41:43,827 --> 00:41:46,034
Mom!
954
00:41:51,793 --> 00:41:53,344
[ Screams ]
955
00:41:53,379 --> 00:41:55,413
-Oh, fuck!
-What?
956
00:41:55,448 --> 00:41:56,793
-This guy --
-Tori!
957
00:41:56,827 --> 00:41:59,103
I think he maybe
just killed the kid next door.
958
00:41:59,137 --> 00:42:00,689
What the hell are you
talking about?
959
00:42:00,724 --> 00:42:03,344
Oh, fuck.
960
00:42:07,689 --> 00:42:08,724
[ Both gasp ]
961
00:42:08,758 --> 00:42:11,103
Oh, fuck!
962
00:42:11,137 --> 00:42:13,310
Call the fucking cops now.
Come on.
963
00:42:13,344 --> 00:42:16,241
Fuck. Have you seen my phone?
Fuck! Get my phone!
964
00:42:16,275 --> 00:42:18,793
-It's upstairs.
-Shit. Is your phone down here?
965
00:42:18,827 --> 00:42:21,482
Robbie, go! Find a phone!
966
00:42:27,655 --> 00:42:29,620
[ Sighs ]
967
00:42:33,172 --> 00:42:35,586
Robbie? He's gone.
968
00:42:35,620 --> 00:42:36,793
ROBBIE: What?
969
00:42:36,827 --> 00:42:38,482
Robbie, he's fucking gone.
970
00:42:38,517 --> 00:42:40,482
He saw us. The fucker's gonna
come over here.
971
00:42:40,517 --> 00:42:41,758
Find a phone
and get the fuck out.
972
00:42:41,793 --> 00:42:43,551
I have to get my sister.
973
00:42:43,586 --> 00:42:46,310
Liddy, Mike, wake the fuck up.
Get your asses out of bed.
974
00:42:46,344 --> 00:42:48,068
There's no time to explain.
Come on, we --
975
00:42:48,103 --> 00:42:49,551
-Come on. We have to go.
-What is going on?
976
00:42:49,586 --> 00:42:51,206
Uh, uh, where's your phone?
977
00:42:51,241 --> 00:42:53,310
It's up there.
There weren't any outlets.
978
00:42:53,344 --> 00:42:55,068
Okay. Get out of bed.
Put your shoes on.
979
00:42:55,103 --> 00:42:56,586
Put your shoes on now.
Come on.
980
00:42:56,620 --> 00:42:58,482
Mike, get the fuck up.
I'm trying to help you.
981
00:42:58,517 --> 00:43:00,137
-Alright, alright.
-Does it look like I'm joking?
982
00:43:00,172 --> 00:43:02,137
You fucking idiot!
Get out of bed!
983
00:43:04,482 --> 00:43:05,724
All right, come on, move it.
You should go.
984
00:43:05,758 --> 00:43:08,034
No, you go.
Mike, get the fuck out.
985
00:43:08,068 --> 00:43:09,103
-Alright.
-Go!
986
00:43:09,137 --> 00:43:11,344
Fuck you, go.
987
00:43:11,379 --> 00:43:12,724
ROBBIE: I have no idea
what the fuck my phone is.
988
00:43:12,758 --> 00:43:14,551
Shut up. Shut the fuck up.
989
00:43:15,551 --> 00:43:18,137
[ Footsteps thudding ]
990
00:43:19,827 --> 00:43:22,103
Where are you keys?
991
00:43:22,137 --> 00:43:23,586
I don't know.
992
00:43:23,620 --> 00:43:25,413
I must have left them
in the truck or something.
993
00:43:25,448 --> 00:43:27,172
Well, if they're not in the
fucking truck, where are they?
994
00:43:27,206 --> 00:43:28,724
I don't fucking know, do I?
995
00:43:28,758 --> 00:43:30,758
Liddy, do you have your keys?
Your fucking keys, Liddy?
996
00:43:30,793 --> 00:43:32,827
-Where are they?
-Get the keys.
997
00:43:32,862 --> 00:43:34,586
The keys? What do you
want with the fuckin' --
998
00:43:34,620 --> 00:43:36,206
Shut the fuck up, you cunt.
999
00:43:36,241 --> 00:43:38,068
Okay. Do you want me
to get the keys or not?
1000
00:43:38,103 --> 00:43:39,206
-Yes.
-Fine. I'll get the keys.
1001
00:43:39,241 --> 00:43:40,793
Jesus.
1002
00:43:45,379 --> 00:43:47,586
Did anybody see where he went?
1003
00:43:50,862 --> 00:43:52,724
Okay.
1004
00:43:52,758 --> 00:43:55,241
Okay, okay, okay.
1005
00:43:55,275 --> 00:43:57,068
We're going to go
to the basement.
1006
00:43:57,103 --> 00:43:58,827
-What if it's in the basement?
-Then we don't have
1007
00:43:58,862 --> 00:44:02,103
anywhere to go, do we?
1008
00:44:02,137 --> 00:44:03,517
Okay, hang on.
1009
00:44:07,172 --> 00:44:08,241
MIKE: All right, I got the keys.
1010
00:44:08,275 --> 00:44:09,655
-Shh!
-Look, I didn't even
1011
00:44:09,689 --> 00:44:11,137
want to come here
in the first --
1012
00:44:11,172 --> 00:44:12,793
Shut the fuck up, Mike.
Shut the fuck up.
1013
00:44:14,137 --> 00:44:16,793
[ Footsteps thudding ]
1014
00:44:28,793 --> 00:44:31,379
[ Footsteps thudding ]
1015
00:44:50,827 --> 00:44:52,448
[ Screams ]
1016
00:45:26,448 --> 00:45:28,344
Get up!
1017
00:45:28,379 --> 00:45:29,793
[ Screaming ]
1018
00:45:29,827 --> 00:45:31,827
Run!
1019
00:45:31,862 --> 00:45:34,482
Get out!
1020
00:45:34,517 --> 00:45:36,241
[ All shouting ]
1021
00:45:38,241 --> 00:45:40,172
[ Screaming ]
1022
00:45:40,448 --> 00:45:43,758
TORI: Go! Fucking! Go!
1023
00:45:43,793 --> 00:45:45,689
[ Screams ]
1024
00:45:46,310 --> 00:45:47,758
Liddy!
1025
00:45:47,793 --> 00:45:51,551
Get -- fuck! Shit!
1026
00:45:52,551 --> 00:45:53,724
No!
1027
00:45:53,758 --> 00:45:56,413
No! Please!
1028
00:45:56,448 --> 00:45:59,000
No! Please! No!
1029
00:46:02,310 --> 00:46:04,310
[ Gasping ]
1030
00:46:05,275 --> 00:46:06,689
[ Retches ]
1031
00:46:06,724 --> 00:46:08,586
Hey, hey, you got to get in,
you got to get in,
1032
00:46:08,620 --> 00:46:09,724
you got to get in,
you got to get in,
1033
00:46:09,758 --> 00:46:11,379
Hey, she's not coming?
Okay.
1034
00:46:11,413 --> 00:46:13,137
-I need my sister --
-Listen to me. Listen to me.
1035
00:46:13,172 --> 00:46:15,034
Listen to me, listen.
Okay, she's not coming, okay?
1036
00:46:15,068 --> 00:46:16,793
You've got to get in the car.
Okay? For me. Please.
1037
00:46:16,827 --> 00:46:18,724
Please, please, please,
please, please.
1038
00:46:18,758 --> 00:46:20,517
Yeah, okay, come on. Yeah.
1039
00:46:20,551 --> 00:46:23,241
Get up, come on.
Just get in there.
1040
00:46:23,275 --> 00:46:24,758
Yeah, okay, get in there.
1041
00:46:24,793 --> 00:46:26,655
-[ Engine sputters ]
-I need Liddy here right now.
1042
00:46:26,689 --> 00:46:27,793
-I need Liddy here.
-Hey.
1043
00:46:27,827 --> 00:46:31,344
-Come on, Robbie!
-Come on!
1044
00:46:31,379 --> 00:46:34,379
Fuck you! Fuck!
1045
00:46:34,413 --> 00:46:36,689
[ Engine sputters, starts ]
1046
00:46:36,724 --> 00:46:39,620
Go, Robbie, come on.
1047
00:46:39,655 --> 00:46:41,517
[ Gasping ]
1048
00:46:45,241 --> 00:46:47,517
Robbie! Robbie!
1049
00:46:47,551 --> 00:46:49,586
[ Screams ]
1050
00:46:50,379 --> 00:46:54,310
-Fuck.
-Oh, fuck!
1051
00:46:54,344 --> 00:46:55,586
Are you all right?
1052
00:46:55,620 --> 00:46:57,379
-Yeah.
-Okay. Well, we got to --
1053
00:46:57,413 --> 00:46:59,517
We got to go. We got to go
because he's gonna come back.
1054
00:46:59,551 --> 00:47:01,310
-[ Engine revs ]
-Come on!
1055
00:47:01,344 --> 00:47:04,206
-Fuck! It's stuck.
-Try going forward.
1056
00:47:04,241 --> 00:47:05,655
MAN: What the fuck?!
1057
00:47:05,689 --> 00:47:08,103
-Fuck.
-Oh, fuck!
1058
00:47:08,137 --> 00:47:09,793
Totaled by fuckin' Ranchero!
1059
00:47:09,827 --> 00:47:11,275
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
1060
00:47:11,310 --> 00:47:12,310
[ Engine revving ]
1061
00:47:12,344 --> 00:47:13,448
-Come on.
-Fuck!
1062
00:47:13,482 --> 00:47:15,103
You fucking cocksuckers!
1063
00:47:15,137 --> 00:47:17,034
-Hey.
-B, hey, hey.
1064
00:47:17,068 --> 00:47:18,620
Get the fuck out of the car.
1065
00:47:18,655 --> 00:47:20,724
TORI: I can't get out of the
fucking car. Listen to me.
1066
00:47:20,758 --> 00:47:23,413
What is with this door? Hey,
you two bit fuckin' scumbag,
1067
00:47:23,448 --> 00:47:26,034
get the fuck out of the car.
Come on.
1068
00:47:26,068 --> 00:47:27,586
-Oh, what the fuck?
-Fuck!
1069
00:47:27,620 --> 00:47:29,137
Get out of the fucking car!
1070
00:47:29,172 --> 00:47:30,758
Oh, look, the paint's
all fucked up, man!
1071
00:47:30,793 --> 00:47:33,068
I just got this detailed!
1072
00:47:33,103 --> 00:47:36,137
I'm calling the fuckin' cops on
your ass, Tori.
1073
00:47:36,172 --> 00:47:37,482
-Hello?
-Go now.
1074
00:47:37,517 --> 00:47:39,172
-246 --
-Fuck. He's coming.
1075
00:47:39,206 --> 00:47:40,379
-[ Horn honking ]
-He's right there! Hey!
1076
00:47:40,413 --> 00:47:42,206
He can't fucking
hear you because --
1077
00:47:42,241 --> 00:47:44,551
-Hey, behind you!
-Hey, behind you!
1078
00:47:44,586 --> 00:47:47,275
-Behind you!
-No, no, no, no!
1079
00:47:47,310 --> 00:47:48,620
No!
1080
00:47:48,655 --> 00:47:50,793
-[ Horn honking ]
-Stop fucking honking!
1081
00:47:50,827 --> 00:47:52,379
Oh!
1082
00:47:54,310 --> 00:47:55,724
Okay, go.
1083
00:47:55,758 --> 00:47:58,206
-[ Engine revving ]
-Go, come on, let's go!
1084
00:47:58,241 --> 00:48:01,448
ROBBIE: I'm trying!
1085
00:48:02,586 --> 00:48:04,241
Oh, oh!
1086
00:48:04,275 --> 00:48:05,689
[ Screams ]
1087
00:48:07,724 --> 00:48:10,000
Okay, okay! Fucking drive!
1088
00:48:15,379 --> 00:48:17,241
[ Groans ]
1089
00:48:27,137 --> 00:48:29,103
No! No! No!
1090
00:48:29,793 --> 00:48:31,620
No!
1091
00:48:31,655 --> 00:48:34,827
Fucker! Robbie!
No, fuck off!
1092
00:48:34,862 --> 00:48:36,586
Robbie!
1093
00:48:36,620 --> 00:48:40,103
No! No! Robbie! No!
1094
00:48:40,137 --> 00:48:42,758
Oh, fuck!
1095
00:48:42,793 --> 00:48:45,413
No, Robbie. You got to get up.
1096
00:48:45,448 --> 00:48:48,137
You got to get up right now.
Get up right now, come on!
1097
00:48:48,172 --> 00:48:51,034
Get your ass -- get your ass up,
come on!
1098
00:48:51,068 --> 00:48:53,275
Get the fuck up, Robbie!
1099
00:48:53,310 --> 00:48:55,655
-[ Horn honking ]
-Somebody help us!
1100
00:48:55,689 --> 00:48:57,620
Where the fuck is everyone?
1101
00:48:57,655 --> 00:49:00,241
No! Robbie, Robbie,
he's coming back.
1102
00:49:00,275 --> 00:49:01,793
-[ Horn honking ]
-Come on, get up, get up.
1103
00:49:01,827 --> 00:49:03,758
Get it here, Robbie!
1104
00:49:03,793 --> 00:49:05,827
No! Behind you!
1105
00:49:05,862 --> 00:49:07,793
Behind you!
1106
00:49:07,827 --> 00:49:09,586
No!
1107
00:49:09,620 --> 00:49:12,551
Robbie!
1108
00:49:12,586 --> 00:49:15,517
[ Siren wailing ]
1109
00:49:17,206 --> 00:49:19,344
Oh, no, no, no, no, no!
1110
00:49:19,379 --> 00:49:21,206
Hide!
1111
00:49:21,241 --> 00:49:22,620
Drop the weapon!
1112
00:49:22,655 --> 00:49:24,482
Now!
1113
00:49:24,517 --> 00:49:25,689
Hey!
1114
00:49:25,724 --> 00:49:27,206
Don't come any closer!
1115
00:49:27,241 --> 00:49:28,413
Kill this motherfucker!
1116
00:49:28,448 --> 00:49:31,689
Drop the weapon now!
1117
00:49:31,724 --> 00:49:35,655
[ Gunshots ]
1118
00:49:37,241 --> 00:49:38,551
[ Thuds ]
1119
00:49:40,724 --> 00:49:42,448
This is Officer Danny Davis.
1120
00:49:42,482 --> 00:49:44,724
I got at least three people
down at 246 Chestnut.
1121
00:49:44,758 --> 00:49:48,413
Send back up
and an ambulance immediately.
1122
00:49:48,655 --> 00:49:51,379
[ Tori gasping ]
1123
00:49:51,413 --> 00:49:53,275
[ Police radio chatter ]
1124
00:49:53,310 --> 00:49:55,206
It's gonna be okay.
1125
00:49:55,241 --> 00:49:56,517
Don't touch me. Don't touch me!
1126
00:49:56,551 --> 00:50:00,413
It's okay. Help is on the way.
1127
00:50:00,448 --> 00:50:02,172
Help is on the way, okay?
1128
00:50:02,206 --> 00:50:05,137
-Are you sure he's dead?
-Yes. He's dead.
1129
00:50:05,172 --> 00:50:07,310
He's dead.
1130
00:50:07,344 --> 00:50:09,275
He's not getting up.
1131
00:50:11,068 --> 00:50:12,689
I got you.
1132
00:50:15,517 --> 00:50:17,206
Oh, Robbie.
1133
00:50:17,241 --> 00:50:19,310
-I got you.
-Oh, Robbie. Robbie!
1134
00:50:19,344 --> 00:50:21,379
It's okay, it's okay. Don't
look at him. Don't look at him.
1135
00:50:21,413 --> 00:50:25,482
Okay, stay calm.
Help is on the way, alright?
1136
00:50:28,793 --> 00:50:32,482
It's gonna be okay. It's gonna
be fi-- Watch your head.
1137
00:50:47,551 --> 00:50:49,241
Can you tell me what happened?
1138
00:50:49,275 --> 00:50:51,344
-You need to check the store.
-What?
1139
00:50:51,379 --> 00:50:53,241
The toy store.
You need to check the toy store.
1140
00:50:53,275 --> 00:50:55,068
Why?
1141
00:50:55,103 --> 00:50:58,172
Because that thing looks exactly
like the Santa from the store.
1142
00:50:58,206 --> 00:51:00,310
You mean the T.W. Bonkers thing?
1143
00:51:00,344 --> 00:51:02,172
Yeah.
1144
00:51:02,206 --> 00:51:04,758
That fucking guy looks exactly
like the thing from the store.
1145
00:51:04,793 --> 00:51:06,586
I can assure it's not
on the same Santa.
1146
00:51:06,620 --> 00:51:08,724
No, no, that's -- I'm saying
that maybe he took
1147
00:51:08,758 --> 00:51:10,517
the fucking suit or something.
1148
00:51:10,551 --> 00:51:13,586
And my friends, my friends were
staying the night there,
1149
00:51:13,620 --> 00:51:15,758
and -- and maybe that fucker
killed them and then took
1150
00:51:15,793 --> 00:51:17,241
the fucking suit.
That's what I'm saying.
1151
00:51:17,275 --> 00:51:19,103
He didn't get that
thing anywhere.
1152
00:51:19,137 --> 00:51:20,551
You need to fucking check!
Okay?
1153
00:51:20,586 --> 00:51:22,241
-There's only a few of us, okay?
-I don't fucking care.
1154
00:51:22,275 --> 00:51:24,517
Listen to me. No one's been
fucking listening to me.
1155
00:51:24,551 --> 00:51:25,793
There's only a few of us!
1156
00:51:25,827 --> 00:51:27,793
You need to do
a fucking drive by!
1157
00:51:27,827 --> 00:51:29,655
-More people are gonna die!
-Once everything --
1158
00:51:29,689 --> 00:51:31,655
Once everything is all right,
I can go back and do a check.
1159
00:51:31,689 --> 00:51:33,517
More people are gonna
fucking die!
1160
00:51:33,551 --> 00:51:36,103
Calm down.
1161
00:51:37,137 --> 00:51:39,482
Shoot him! Fucking shoot him!
1162
00:51:48,620 --> 00:51:53,448
Blow his fucking head off,
Davies, now!
1163
00:51:53,482 --> 00:51:55,344
[ Gun clicks ]
1164
00:51:55,379 --> 00:51:56,586
He's done for!
1165
00:51:56,620 --> 00:51:58,551
Ah!
1166
00:51:58,586 --> 00:52:00,793
Davies?
1167
00:52:04,793 --> 00:52:08,517
Davies? Davies, get the fuck up!
1168
00:52:08,551 --> 00:52:12,448
Hey! Oh, you fuckin' idiot!
Come on!
1169
00:52:12,482 --> 00:52:14,344
Get up!
1170
00:52:14,379 --> 00:52:16,241
Behind you!
1171
00:52:16,275 --> 00:52:19,206
No, no, no, no, no!
1172
00:52:19,241 --> 00:52:20,620
[ Gasps ]
1173
00:52:20,655 --> 00:52:22,034
[ Gun cocks ]
1174
00:52:26,241 --> 00:52:27,482
[ Gun cocks ]
1175
00:52:28,379 --> 00:52:30,172
[ Grunts ]
1176
00:52:30,206 --> 00:52:32,000
[ Screams ]
1177
00:52:37,827 --> 00:52:39,655
[ Tires squeal ]
1178
00:52:39,689 --> 00:52:41,379
[ Screams ]
1179
00:52:44,724 --> 00:52:46,724
[ Screaming ]
1180
00:52:48,482 --> 00:52:50,448
[ Mechanical whirring ]
1181
00:52:50,482 --> 00:52:52,068
Ho, ho, ho!
1182
00:52:52,103 --> 00:52:54,172
[ Distorted ] Merry Christmas.
1183
00:52:56,724 --> 00:52:58,655
[ Mechanical whirring ]
1184
00:52:59,344 --> 00:53:01,793
[ Engine revving ]
1185
00:53:01,827 --> 00:53:03,620
Okay, okay.
1186
00:53:03,655 --> 00:53:05,068
Okay, okay, okay.
1187
00:53:05,103 --> 00:53:08,034
[ Police radio chatter]
1188
00:53:08,068 --> 00:53:10,620
Hello?
Officer Davis was killed, okay?
1189
00:53:10,655 --> 00:53:12,413
He's fucking dead.
Is anyone there?
1190
00:53:12,448 --> 00:53:13,655
[ Static]
1191
00:53:13,689 --> 00:53:15,068
Listen to me.
1192
00:53:15,103 --> 00:53:17,689
The officers going to
246 Chestnut
1193
00:53:17,724 --> 00:53:19,724
need to be fucking careful
because the killer is
1194
00:53:19,758 --> 00:53:22,379
still there, and he looks like
fucking Santa, okay?
1195
00:53:22,413 --> 00:53:23,586
He's in a Santa costume.
1196
00:53:23,620 --> 00:53:25,793
Fuck!
1197
00:53:25,827 --> 00:53:28,517
-[ Police radio chatter]
-Oh, fuck.
1198
00:53:28,551 --> 00:53:31,724
Yes, go!
1199
00:53:31,758 --> 00:53:33,413
[ Sirens wailing ]
1200
00:53:33,448 --> 00:53:36,551
Hey! Hey!
1201
00:53:36,586 --> 00:53:39,241
Hey!
1202
00:53:39,275 --> 00:53:41,517
Stop, stop, stop, stop.
1203
00:53:41,551 --> 00:53:43,206
-Get on the ground!
-No, I've been calling you!
1204
00:53:43,241 --> 00:53:45,517
Don't fuckin' move!
On the ground!
1205
00:53:45,551 --> 00:53:47,586
-Get on the ground!
-Get your hands on your head!
1206
00:53:47,620 --> 00:53:49,103
-I need your help!
-Hands on your head.
1207
00:53:49,137 --> 00:53:50,586
-I need your --
-Get your fucking hands
1208
00:53:50,620 --> 00:53:52,206
-on your head!
-Fine, I'm fucking sorry!
1209
00:53:52,241 --> 00:53:53,689
OFFICER: Get your hands on
your fucking head!
1210
00:53:53,724 --> 00:53:55,275
-No, no, no, I need your help.
-Where's Davies?
1211
00:53:55,310 --> 00:53:57,413
I need your help.
I need your fucking help, man.
1212
00:53:57,448 --> 00:54:00,172
Where is Davies?
Get your hands behind your back.
1213
00:54:00,206 --> 00:54:01,827
He's dead, he's dead, he's dead.
1214
00:54:01,862 --> 00:54:03,724
-What did you just say?
-He's dead. He's fuckin' dead.
1215
00:54:03,758 --> 00:54:05,172
-[ Handcuffs click ]
-They're all fucking dead.
1216
00:54:05,206 --> 00:54:06,413
-Bullshit! Where is he!
-He's dead!
1217
00:54:06,448 --> 00:54:08,586
I've been trying to
fucking tell you!
1218
00:54:08,620 --> 00:54:10,482
-What did you do?
-I didn't do anything?
1219
00:54:10,517 --> 00:54:12,068
-I didn't do anything
-What did you do?
1220
00:54:12,103 --> 00:54:15,172
I need your fuckin' help!
I need your fuckin' help!
1221
00:54:15,206 --> 00:54:18,137
-Get up, sweetheart. Get up!
-I need -- Ah!
1222
00:54:18,172 --> 00:54:20,448
[ Screams ] He's still there!
1223
00:54:20,482 --> 00:54:22,172
You need help, you need help.
1224
00:54:22,206 --> 00:54:24,482
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!
I call the shots!
1225
00:54:24,517 --> 00:54:26,551
-Hey, hey, hey, hey.
-Weston, you get down
1226
00:54:26,586 --> 00:54:29,034
to Chestnut. I'm taking her --
I'm taking you in.
1227
00:54:29,068 --> 00:54:30,413
You can't alone.
You're gonna fuckin' die.
1228
00:54:30,448 --> 00:54:32,068
-Listen.
-You need to call in some --
1229
00:54:32,103 --> 00:54:33,793
-Hey!
-You got to fuckin listen to me.
1230
00:54:33,827 --> 00:54:35,793
You're gonna fucking die.
He killed everybody.
1231
00:54:35,827 --> 00:54:40,517
-You need back up!
-Get in the fuckin' car!
1232
00:54:40,551 --> 00:54:43,344
-You need back up!
-Fuck! Shut the fuck up.
1233
00:54:43,379 --> 00:54:44,827
What do you want to do
with Davies' car?
1234
00:54:44,862 --> 00:54:47,068
Nothing. Don't touch it.
1235
00:54:47,103 --> 00:54:48,586
Fucking crime scene.
1236
00:54:48,620 --> 00:54:50,517
I'll call and have it
towed into the station.
1237
00:54:50,551 --> 00:54:52,689
Alright. Be safe.
1238
00:54:52,724 --> 00:54:55,172
TORI: I need your fucking help.
1239
00:54:55,206 --> 00:54:59,551
-Yeah, yeah, yeah.
-Do you fucking job.
1240
00:54:59,586 --> 00:55:03,551
Shut the fuck up!
1241
00:55:03,586 --> 00:55:04,793
[ Police radio chatter ]
1242
00:55:04,827 --> 00:55:09,068
You can't send him there alone.
1243
00:55:09,103 --> 00:55:11,827
I don't think you're in any
position to tell me what to do.
1244
00:55:11,862 --> 00:55:13,448
You know, you're in a world
of hurt, lady.
1245
00:55:13,482 --> 00:55:15,206
-No fucking --
-You're in a world
1246
00:55:15,241 --> 00:55:16,724
-of fucking shit.
-No fucking idea!
1247
00:55:16,758 --> 00:55:18,482
We caught you covered in blood
and a missing cop --
1248
00:55:18,517 --> 00:55:21,551
MAN: Unit 17, Smith, you there?
1249
00:55:21,586 --> 00:55:24,206
Yeah. This is unit 17.
This is Smith. Go ahead.
1250
00:55:24,241 --> 00:55:27,689
MAN: This is Lenny.
We just got here.
1251
00:55:27,724 --> 00:55:30,551
It's a massacre, and we haven't
even been inside yet.
1252
00:55:30,586 --> 00:55:32,586
Alright, copy that. Look, don't
make a move, alright?
1253
00:55:32,620 --> 00:55:36,206
Just hang back.
Weston's on his way down there.
1254
00:55:36,241 --> 00:55:37,758
Any word from Renn County?
1255
00:55:37,793 --> 00:55:41,310
MAN: Just us right now, sir.
1256
00:55:41,344 --> 00:55:45,310
Any sign of Davies?
1257
00:55:45,344 --> 00:55:47,379
MAN: He's dead, sir.
1258
00:55:47,413 --> 00:55:52,172
Fuck! Fuck! Motherfucker!
1259
00:55:54,551 --> 00:55:57,275
I just saw you at Reggie's
three goddamn hours ago.
1260
00:55:57,310 --> 00:55:58,551
I don't understand.
1261
00:55:58,586 --> 00:56:00,482
What is there
to fucking understand?
1262
00:56:00,517 --> 00:56:03,068
What I don't understand
is the lax fucking attitude
1263
00:56:03,103 --> 00:56:04,482
when people are fucking dead.
1264
00:56:04,517 --> 00:56:06,344
Look, Tori, we know you didn't
murder anyone,
1265
00:56:06,379 --> 00:56:09,413
but we're having a hard time
believing what you're saying.
1266
00:56:09,448 --> 00:56:11,827
I'm having a hard time
fucking believing it. Okay?
1267
00:56:11,862 --> 00:56:14,758
But I saw it. I saw it
with my own goddamn eyes.
1268
00:56:14,793 --> 00:56:16,724
And my fucking eyes don't lie.
Okay, Monroe?
1269
00:56:16,758 --> 00:56:18,793
Listen, I can smell the weed
and whiskey on you
1270
00:56:18,827 --> 00:56:20,655
-from a mile away.
-Yeah. So fucking what?
1271
00:56:20,689 --> 00:56:23,137
I smoked some weed.
I had some fucking whiskey.
1272
00:56:23,172 --> 00:56:24,448
But that does not
make you hallucinate.
1273
00:56:24,482 --> 00:56:26,137
I promise you. I promise you.
1274
00:56:26,172 --> 00:56:28,413
After what I saw, I'm sober.
I'm sober as a fucking --
1275
00:56:28,448 --> 00:56:30,655
Oh, that's good you're sober.
Well, I hate to break it to you,
1276
00:56:30,689 --> 00:56:32,344
Ms. Tooms,
but it is still illegal.
1277
00:56:32,379 --> 00:56:35,172
Can you shut the fuck up?
Shut the fuck up!
1278
00:56:35,206 --> 00:56:37,482
My sister is dead!
1279
00:56:37,517 --> 00:56:39,137
Okay? My fucking friends
are dead.
1280
00:56:39,172 --> 00:56:40,482
Not that you give
a fuck about him.
1281
00:56:40,517 --> 00:56:41,758
But what are you going
to do about it?
1282
00:56:41,793 --> 00:56:43,310
-What do you --
-Hey! Hey!
1283
00:56:43,344 --> 00:56:45,310
The best goddamn officer
in this precinct is dead.
1284
00:56:45,344 --> 00:56:46,758
Now, if you want to be the one
to tell his widow.
1285
00:56:46,793 --> 00:56:48,620
Oh, fuck. Debbie.
Someone's got to tell Debbie.
1286
00:56:48,655 --> 00:56:50,482
Hey, hey, hey, Bobby.
1287
00:56:50,517 --> 00:56:52,034
We're all getting
a little emotional here.
1288
00:56:52,068 --> 00:56:54,689
Just cut it. Both of yous.
You, sit down.
1289
00:56:56,517 --> 00:56:59,551
Get this fucking
off your fucking desk.
1290
00:57:02,793 --> 00:57:04,448
[ Monroe sighs ]
1291
00:57:04,482 --> 00:57:06,655
Have you heard from the boys
down at the scene yet?
1292
00:57:06,689 --> 00:57:08,275
Not since Renn County
showed up.
1293
00:57:08,310 --> 00:57:10,586
They're still down
there counting bodies.
1294
00:57:10,620 --> 00:57:13,482
Nothing about a killer
Santa Claus either.
1295
00:57:13,517 --> 00:57:15,275
MONROE: Well, why don't you
give him a call?
1296
00:57:15,310 --> 00:57:18,517
It's been a little while now.
See if they need any help.
1297
00:57:18,551 --> 00:57:20,068
I think they got it
under control.
1298
00:57:20,103 --> 00:57:21,724
Double check.
1299
00:57:28,137 --> 00:57:30,344
Fuck!
1300
00:57:30,379 --> 00:57:33,551
You need to keep that asshole
away from me, Monroe.
1301
00:57:33,586 --> 00:57:36,275
He's worked with Davies
for over 15 years now.
1302
00:57:36,310 --> 00:57:38,551
We're tight staff. Look around.
1303
00:57:38,586 --> 00:57:41,068
It's been a rough night
for all of us.
1304
00:57:41,103 --> 00:57:42,551
-[ Laughing ]
-Bear with us.
1305
00:57:42,586 --> 00:57:44,724
We'll do the same.
1306
00:57:44,758 --> 00:57:46,793
Just breathe.
1307
00:57:47,413 --> 00:57:49,034
[ Sighs ]
1308
00:57:54,310 --> 00:57:58,206
Okay, I'm going to brew
a fresh pot of coffee.
1309
00:57:58,241 --> 00:57:59,620
There's a bathroom down the hall
1310
00:57:59,655 --> 00:58:02,000
if you want to
clean yourself up some.
1311
00:58:10,310 --> 00:58:13,482
[ Electric buzzing ]
1312
00:58:15,172 --> 00:58:17,172
[ Sighs ]
1313
00:58:30,827 --> 00:58:33,068
[ Sighs ]
1314
00:59:00,586 --> 00:59:03,551
[ Indistinct talking
in distance ]
1315
00:59:03,586 --> 00:59:05,517
SMITH: There is no
fucking back up, man.
1316
00:59:05,551 --> 00:59:08,034
MONROE: Just hold on a second.
Just hold on a second.
1317
00:59:08,068 --> 00:59:09,655
We got to think this out.
1318
00:59:09,689 --> 00:59:11,068
TORI: Oh, shit.
1319
00:59:11,103 --> 00:59:12,310
Have tried the guys
from Renn?
1320
00:59:12,344 --> 00:59:16,517
Yep, Renn, paramedics, Weston.
1321
00:59:16,551 --> 00:59:17,655
Nothing.
1322
00:59:17,689 --> 00:59:19,413
CHP? Anything?
1323
00:59:19,448 --> 00:59:21,034
-Nope.
-Hey. Hey. Hey.
1324
00:59:21,068 --> 00:59:22,620
-What's going on?
-You coming with me or not?
1325
00:59:22,655 --> 00:59:25,137
TORI: Something happen? You guys
can't go back to my house.
1326
00:59:25,172 --> 00:59:26,793
-I told you.
-We're police, Tori.
1327
00:59:26,827 --> 00:59:28,586
-That's what we do.
-Well, no.
1328
00:59:28,620 --> 00:59:30,310
You need to call the fucking
National Guard or something.
1329
00:59:30,344 --> 00:59:32,586
He wiped everybody out.
He's going to wipe you out!
1330
00:59:32,620 --> 00:59:34,551
Hey, you know, Monroe,
maybe you should stay here.
1331
00:59:34,586 --> 00:59:36,206
You can, baby sit
the little girl.
1332
00:59:36,241 --> 00:59:37,517
Okay, you know what?
If you don't want to fucking
1333
00:59:37,551 --> 00:59:39,137
listen to me,
you go out there and die.
1334
00:59:39,172 --> 00:59:40,586
Because, quite frankly,
I don't fucking care.
1335
00:59:40,620 --> 00:59:43,275
Tori, we're going to go,
we're gonna lock the door.
1336
00:59:43,310 --> 00:59:45,517
-No, no.
-Oh, oh, oh, oh.
1337
00:59:45,551 --> 00:59:47,379
-[ Siren wailing ]
-What is that?
1338
00:59:47,413 --> 00:59:49,344
Yeah. What the fuck is that?
1339
00:59:52,724 --> 00:59:54,344
That an ambulance?
1340
00:59:54,379 --> 00:59:57,206
Oh, fuck. It's him.
1341
00:59:57,241 --> 00:59:58,724
Oh, Santa Claus?
1342
00:59:58,758 --> 01:00:00,344
-Yeah, it's fuckin' Santa Claus.
-Fuckin' Santa Claus!
1343
01:00:00,379 --> 01:00:03,068
It's the motherfucker
that killed everybody.
1344
01:00:03,103 --> 01:00:04,655
Okay, okay, uh...
1345
01:00:04,689 --> 01:00:06,448
-Oh, fuck.
-He's not stopping.
1346
01:00:06,482 --> 01:00:08,310
Fuck!
1347
01:00:08,344 --> 01:00:10,000
[ Explosion ]
1348
01:00:10,620 --> 01:00:13,620
[ Glass shattering ]
1349
01:00:19,827 --> 01:00:23,034
Fuck! Ah!
1350
01:00:23,068 --> 01:00:25,103
MONROE: Is everyone all right?
1351
01:00:25,137 --> 01:00:27,034
Yeah, I think I'm fine.
1352
01:00:27,068 --> 01:00:30,793
-Tori?
-Uh, yeah.
1353
01:00:30,827 --> 01:00:34,034
[ Coughing ]
1354
01:00:34,068 --> 01:00:38,137
Jesus Christ.
What the fuck was that?
1355
01:00:38,172 --> 01:00:41,827
Hey, Tori, take these,
go to the holding room,
1356
01:00:41,862 --> 01:00:43,344
lock yourself in.
1357
01:00:43,379 --> 01:00:45,379
No, no, no!
There's fucking people dead.
1358
01:00:45,413 --> 01:00:47,655
You need to give me a gun. You
need to give me a fucking gun.
1359
01:00:47,689 --> 01:00:49,482
-Where the driver?
-You're 38. Give her your 38.
1360
01:00:49,517 --> 01:00:51,172
Are you out
of your fucking mind?
1361
01:00:51,206 --> 01:00:53,241
-Give me your fucking gun.
-Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa.
1362
01:00:53,275 --> 01:00:54,793
Hey, do you even know
how to use that thing?
1363
01:00:54,827 --> 01:00:56,620
TORI: Yeah. You aim is and pull
the fucking trigger.
1364
01:00:56,655 --> 01:00:58,172
Yeah?
1365
01:00:58,206 --> 01:00:59,793
Let's go.
1366
01:01:05,379 --> 01:01:08,275
[ Panting ]
1367
01:01:13,103 --> 01:01:14,586
Cover me.
1368
01:01:24,137 --> 01:01:25,344
Okay. I'm clear.
1369
01:01:25,379 --> 01:01:27,068
Tori, get in there!
1370
01:01:27,103 --> 01:01:29,379
Stay away from the fucking car!
He's in there!
1371
01:01:29,413 --> 01:01:31,413
Do you see anything?
1372
01:01:36,482 --> 01:01:39,517
Something's not right.
Something's not right!
1373
01:01:39,551 --> 01:01:41,793
Yeah, he's not fucking human.
That's what's not right.
1374
01:01:41,827 --> 01:01:43,413
Do you see anything?
1375
01:01:43,448 --> 01:01:45,275
[ Screaming, gunshots ]
1376
01:01:45,310 --> 01:01:48,310
Monroe! Monroe!
1377
01:01:50,379 --> 01:01:52,137
Oh, fuck!
1378
01:01:53,103 --> 01:01:55,206
Where are you, motherfucker?!
1379
01:01:55,241 --> 01:01:57,068
Show yourself!
1380
01:01:57,103 --> 01:01:59,379
Get out of here now!
1381
01:01:59,413 --> 01:02:03,620
Come on, motherfucker!
Let me see your face.
1382
01:02:03,655 --> 01:02:05,068
Hey!
1383
01:02:08,172 --> 01:02:09,689
Come on, fuck you!
1384
01:02:11,655 --> 01:02:13,793
Oh, no, wait!
1385
01:02:13,827 --> 01:02:15,344
No! No!
1386
01:02:15,379 --> 01:02:16,344
Aah!
1387
01:02:16,379 --> 01:02:19,482
Oh, fuck!
1388
01:02:23,172 --> 01:02:25,172
[ Siren wailing ]
1389
01:02:32,620 --> 01:02:34,137
[ Taser pops ]
1390
01:02:44,379 --> 01:02:46,758
Oh, God. Okay.
1391
01:03:10,448 --> 01:03:13,310
Hello? Oh, fuck!
1392
01:03:13,344 --> 01:03:14,689
Fuck.
1393
01:03:27,068 --> 01:03:28,586
[ Gasps ]
1394
01:03:31,310 --> 01:03:35,000
Okay, okay, okay.
1395
01:03:35,586 --> 01:03:36,620
Uh...
1396
01:03:37,586 --> 01:03:39,034
Hello?
1397
01:03:39,413 --> 01:03:40,689
Hello?
1398
01:03:40,724 --> 01:03:42,758
Fuck!
1399
01:03:51,068 --> 01:03:53,206
[ Police radio chatter]
1400
01:03:59,448 --> 01:04:01,172
[ Static]
1401
01:04:01,206 --> 01:04:03,551
Hello? Hello, is anyone there?
1402
01:04:03,586 --> 01:04:05,068
Dispatch, I'm at the fuckin'
police station.
1403
01:04:05,103 --> 01:04:06,655
I need your help.
1404
01:04:06,689 --> 01:04:08,620
Hello? Someone fuckin' answer
me, please.
1405
01:04:08,655 --> 01:04:10,413
Fuck!
1406
01:04:17,758 --> 01:04:22,241
[ Electricity powers down ]
1407
01:04:25,413 --> 01:04:27,344
[ Flames crackling ]
1408
01:04:30,793 --> 01:04:32,758
[ Panting ]
1409
01:04:40,482 --> 01:04:42,620
[ Crashing ]
1410
01:04:46,310 --> 01:04:48,068
[ Gasps ]
1411
01:04:58,689 --> 01:05:01,068
[ Mechanical whirring,
footsteps ]
1412
01:05:35,655 --> 01:05:37,689
[ Clattering ]
1413
01:05:45,620 --> 01:05:47,758
[ Clattering ]
1414
01:05:50,241 --> 01:05:53,310
[ Glass shatters ]
1415
01:06:05,068 --> 01:06:07,206
[ Mechanical whirring,
footsteps ]
1416
01:06:14,172 --> 01:06:17,034
[ Glass shattering ]
1417
01:06:43,448 --> 01:06:46,034
[ Mechanical whirring,
footsteps ]
1418
01:07:02,827 --> 01:07:05,034
[ Mechanical whirring,
footsteps ]
1419
01:07:10,793 --> 01:07:12,034
[ Screams ]
1420
01:07:12,068 --> 01:07:14,206
Fuck you!
1421
01:07:14,241 --> 01:07:15,827
[ Screams ]
1422
01:07:15,862 --> 01:07:19,379
No! No! No!
1423
01:07:19,413 --> 01:07:23,103
No! No!
1424
01:07:23,137 --> 01:07:26,241
No, no! No!
1425
01:07:26,275 --> 01:07:28,344
[ Taser crackling ]
1426
01:07:29,137 --> 01:07:31,620
-[ Taser crackling ]
-[ Screaming ]
1427
01:07:36,137 --> 01:07:37,620
[ Panting ]
1428
01:07:40,517 --> 01:07:42,448
[ Sighs ]
1429
01:07:46,620 --> 01:07:48,103
[ Spits ]
1430
01:07:48,137 --> 01:07:50,551
Fucking cocksucker!
1431
01:07:50,586 --> 01:07:52,103
[ Panting ]
1432
01:08:00,275 --> 01:08:02,482
[ Mechanical whirring ]
1433
01:08:04,172 --> 01:08:06,068
[ Panting ]
1434
01:08:13,517 --> 01:08:15,793
Hello? Hello?
Can anybody hear me?
1435
01:08:15,827 --> 01:08:18,551
Everybody's fucking dead!
Please, someone, please!
1436
01:08:18,586 --> 01:08:20,620
[ Mechanical whirring ]
1437
01:08:22,724 --> 01:08:24,724
Fuck! Okay.
Come on, come on, come on.
1438
01:08:24,758 --> 01:08:27,344
-[ Engine sputters ]
-Yes, come on! Come on!
1439
01:08:27,379 --> 01:08:29,482
[ Mechanical whirring ]
1440
01:08:30,103 --> 01:08:31,137
[ Engine starts ]
1441
01:08:31,172 --> 01:08:33,068
Yes! Yes!
1442
01:08:33,103 --> 01:08:34,586
Ah!
1443
01:08:34,620 --> 01:08:36,482
[ Running footsteps ]
1444
01:08:39,793 --> 01:08:43,172
[ Tires squealing ]
1445
01:08:58,344 --> 01:09:00,655
Oh, fuck!
1446
01:09:00,689 --> 01:09:02,103
Fuck!
1447
01:09:03,172 --> 01:09:04,793
Fuck you! No!
1448
01:09:09,275 --> 01:09:10,620
[ Tires squeal ]
1449
01:09:12,620 --> 01:09:14,724
[ Tires squeal ]
1450
01:09:20,275 --> 01:09:21,586
Fuck you!
1451
01:09:24,482 --> 01:09:25,482
[ Mechanical whirring ]
1452
01:09:25,517 --> 01:09:27,758
No! No!
1453
01:09:27,793 --> 01:09:29,551
No!
1454
01:09:31,137 --> 01:09:33,172
What the fuck?! Fuck!
1455
01:09:35,344 --> 01:09:37,137
Fuck you!
1456
01:10:55,344 --> 01:10:57,482
[ Screams ]
1457
01:11:02,862 --> 01:11:05,137
[ Groans ]
1458
01:11:23,827 --> 01:11:26,344
[ Thudding ]
1459
01:11:29,517 --> 01:11:31,275
[ Grunts ]
1460
01:11:58,275 --> 01:12:01,103
[ Explosion ]
1461
01:12:18,379 --> 01:12:22,206
[ Metal clanging ]
1462
01:12:32,655 --> 01:12:34,068
[ Grunts ]
1463
01:12:34,103 --> 01:12:35,379
Fuck!
1464
01:12:42,827 --> 01:12:45,241
[ Panting ]
1465
01:12:48,689 --> 01:12:50,379
[ Grunts ]
1466
01:12:50,413 --> 01:12:51,655
Fuck!
1467
01:12:52,620 --> 01:12:54,793
-[ Glass shatters ]
-Fuck!
1468
01:12:57,206 --> 01:12:59,068
[ Grunts ]
1469
01:13:18,655 --> 01:13:20,517
[ Groans ]
1470
01:13:23,103 --> 01:13:24,758
[ Sighs ]
1471
01:13:28,517 --> 01:13:30,551
[ Flames crackling ]
1472
01:13:30,586 --> 01:13:32,689
[ Mechanical whirring ]
1473
01:13:45,517 --> 01:13:47,448
[ Sighs ]
1474
01:14:01,379 --> 01:14:03,379
[ Mechanical whirring ]
1475
01:14:41,379 --> 01:14:44,620
[ Footsteps thudding ]
1476
01:15:05,551 --> 01:15:07,379
[ Panting ]
1477
01:15:07,689 --> 01:15:09,758
What the fuck?!
1478
01:15:12,724 --> 01:15:14,758
[ Footsteps thudding ]
1479
01:15:18,586 --> 01:15:21,551
[ Mechanical whirring ]
1480
01:15:47,620 --> 01:15:49,620
[ Footsteps thudding ]
1481
01:16:10,448 --> 01:16:12,655
[ Crackling ]
1482
01:16:23,655 --> 01:16:25,517
[ Footsteps thudding ]
1483
01:16:37,310 --> 01:16:40,413
[ Crackling ]
1484
01:17:01,448 --> 01:17:02,620
[ Screams ]
1485
01:17:02,655 --> 01:17:04,586
[ Crackling ]
1486
01:17:05,517 --> 01:17:09,137
[ Screaming ]
1487
01:17:18,517 --> 01:17:19,724
[ Sighs ]
1488
01:17:19,758 --> 01:17:22,172
[ Screams ]
1489
01:17:26,275 --> 01:17:28,344
[ Crackling ]
1490
01:17:44,724 --> 01:17:46,689
[ Groans ]
1491
01:17:56,758 --> 01:17:59,724
[ Panting ]
1492
01:17:59,758 --> 01:18:01,448
Okay.
1493
01:18:02,793 --> 01:18:04,275
[ Mechanical whirring ]
1494
01:18:07,448 --> 01:18:10,793
[ Whirring ]
1495
01:18:12,103 --> 01:18:14,655
No, no, no, no!
1496
01:18:14,689 --> 01:18:16,241
No!
1497
01:18:16,275 --> 01:18:18,344
[ Gasping ]
1498
01:18:25,689 --> 01:18:28,275
[ Crackling ]
1499
01:18:32,655 --> 01:18:34,206
[ Gasps ]
1500
01:18:48,448 --> 01:18:50,758
Oh, fuck.
1501
01:18:54,206 --> 01:18:55,793
Fuck!
1502
01:18:55,827 --> 01:18:59,068
Come on. Come on.
1503
01:19:00,344 --> 01:19:01,793
[ Crackling ]
1504
01:19:01,827 --> 01:19:04,241
Come on! No, no, no!
1505
01:19:04,275 --> 01:19:06,206
Come on!
1506
01:19:06,241 --> 01:19:08,172
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck,
come on!
1507
01:19:08,206 --> 01:19:13,241
Come on! Fuck you!
1508
01:19:13,275 --> 01:19:15,068
[ Screams ]
1509
01:19:16,758 --> 01:19:19,172
Oh, fuck!
1510
01:19:19,379 --> 01:19:22,620
[ Crackling ]
1511
01:19:30,793 --> 01:19:33,103
[ Groans ]
1512
01:19:34,241 --> 01:19:36,068
[ Screams ]
1513
01:19:36,517 --> 01:19:38,413
[ Gasps ]
1514
01:19:38,448 --> 01:19:40,620
[ Screams ]
1515
01:19:43,275 --> 01:19:45,206
[ Crackling ]
1516
01:19:48,827 --> 01:19:51,344
[ Screams ]
1517
01:20:01,275 --> 01:20:03,103
[ Gasps ]
1518
01:20:04,103 --> 01:20:05,620
Oh, fuck!
1519
01:20:05,655 --> 01:20:08,137
[ Crackling ]
1520
01:20:15,206 --> 01:20:16,793
[ Screams ]
1521
01:20:20,344 --> 01:20:21,620
[ Gasps ]
1522
01:20:21,655 --> 01:20:24,655
[ Crackling ]
1523
01:20:26,551 --> 01:20:28,586
[ Gasps ]
1524
01:20:28,620 --> 01:20:30,655
[ Groans ]
1525
01:20:32,620 --> 01:20:35,172
[ Crackling ]
1526
01:20:37,620 --> 01:20:39,448
[ Screams ]
1527
01:20:42,482 --> 01:20:45,379
[ Screaming ]
1528
01:20:51,586 --> 01:20:53,517
[ Screams ]
1529
01:20:57,586 --> 01:20:59,689
[ Crackling ]
1530
01:21:09,137 --> 01:21:11,517
[ Screams ] No!
1531
01:21:11,551 --> 01:21:13,724
[ Screaming ]
1532
01:21:14,827 --> 01:21:17,482
Fuck! No!
1533
01:21:22,068 --> 01:21:25,620
[ Crackling ]
1534
01:21:28,310 --> 01:21:30,344
[ Groans ]
1535
01:21:31,068 --> 01:21:33,241
[ Screams ]
1536
01:21:36,586 --> 01:21:38,689
[ Gasping ]
1537
01:21:39,655 --> 01:21:41,655
[ Crackling ]
1538
01:21:46,206 --> 01:21:48,551
No! No!
1539
01:21:49,413 --> 01:21:52,517
No! No! No!
1540
01:21:52,551 --> 01:21:54,586
Fuck! Fuck!
1541
01:21:57,379 --> 01:21:59,275
Ah! Fuck!
1542
01:22:03,620 --> 01:22:06,482
[ Screams ]
1543
01:22:09,310 --> 01:22:10,758
[ Grunts ]
1544
01:22:14,517 --> 01:22:16,379
[ Screams ]
1545
01:22:20,724 --> 01:22:23,689
[ Crackling ]
1546
01:22:29,551 --> 01:22:32,413
[ Screams ]
1547
01:22:38,793 --> 01:22:48,517
♪♪
1548
01:22:48,551 --> 01:22:58,310
♪♪
1549
01:22:58,344 --> 01:23:08,068
♪♪
1550
01:23:08,103 --> 01:23:17,655
♪♪
1551
01:23:17,689 --> 01:23:27,448
♪♪
1552
01:23:27,482 --> 01:23:37,206
♪♪
1553
01:23:37,241 --> 01:23:46,793
♪♪
1554
01:23:46,827 --> 01:23:56,551
♪♪
1555
01:23:56,586 --> 01:24:06,344
♪♪
1556
01:24:06,379 --> 01:24:16,103
♪♪
1557
01:24:16,137 --> 01:24:25,689
♪♪
1558
01:24:25,724 --> 01:24:35,482
♪♪
1559
01:24:35,517 --> 01:24:45,241
♪♪
1560
01:24:45,275 --> 01:24:54,827
♪♪
1561
01:24:54,862 --> 01:25:04,620
♪♪
1562
01:25:04,655 --> 01:25:14,379
♪♪
1563
01:25:14,413 --> 01:25:24,137
♪♪
1564
01:25:24,172 --> 01:25:33,758
♪♪
1565
01:25:33,793 --> 01:25:43,517
♪♪
1566
01:25:43,551 --> 01:25:53,275
♪♪
1567
01:25:53,310 --> 01:26:03,034
♪♪
1568
01:26:03,068 --> 01:26:12,655
♪♪
1569
01:26:12,689 --> 01:26:22,413
♪♪
1570
01:26:22,448 --> 01:26:32,172
♪♪
1571
01:26:32,206 --> 01:26:41,793
♪♪
1572
01:26:41,827 --> 01:26:51,586
♪♪
105887
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