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[indistinct chatter]

[soft music]

♪

- Hi, Dad.

- Aww, I love you, too, Daddy.

- Sorry, who am
I speaking with?

- You're speaking
with Eli's daughter Ondi.

- Ondi, yes, hi.
What is his baseline?

- Well, he was brought
to the hospital

because he was having
a hard time breathing,

but he's been struggling
for a long time.

You know, he's been paralyzed
for 40 years

from an accidental stroke.

- I know.
I read that, such a shame.

- Yet, he never complains.

And he thinks
about everybody else.

He even struggles
to walk by himself

because he doesn't wanna be
a burden,

but he keeps falling.

- Mm-hmm.

- It's a miracle
he hasn't broken anything yet.

We feel like
it's just not safe

for him to be home anymore.

- Definitely, yes.

- It breaks my heart because
he really wants to come home.

- He really does.

- No.

- Because you've been in bed
for five days or something,

you need care.

You need people
to help you move

and all that kind of stuff.

- You know, I have a plan.
You want to hear my plan?

- I'm gonna ask the doctor
when they're releasing you,

and then I'm gonna run
to the hospital

and grab you
for a kiss and a hug

and find out exactly
where you're going,

and then I'm gonna work on--
hopefully,

there'll be a different COVID
protocol where you're going,

and then we'll
be able to visit.

That's my plan.

- Okay, good.

♪

- Did you try
to call me, Daddy?

Are you okay?

- You're waiting to die?

- I thought you were waiting
to see me today.

- I didn't know
you wanted to die.

That's--

- Being inside your body
is what's torturing you now.

- It's gotta get recycled.

- But your mind will travel
on, and so every time--

- Every time you're feeling--

- I'm doing it, Daddy.

- For it to be legal, Dad,
you have to tell

a nurse or a doctor
who's working in hospice.

- No, no, no,
when you're in hospice,

once you start,
which will be tomorrow.

- Eli, listen.

You don't make the rules.

- Yes.
- You don't make the rules.

- Daddy, you're really
lucky to live in California.

- Yep.

- If you were in New York,
with Rachel,

you wouldn't have
this option right now.

- That's right.

- And, Daddy,
we have to do it legally,

or we all go to jail.

You don't want that.

- Exactly.

- Aww.
- We understand, darling.

And we're--
- Daddy, what is the reason?

Are you in a lot
of pain right now?

[dog barking]

[laughter]

[phone line trilling]

- Oh, my God.

[phone line trilling]

- Hi, Daddy.

- Yeah, you're
getting out today.

- End it?
End your life?

- What, you think
you're gonna come home,

make a poop with Cooper,
and end your life?

- You know how it goes,
Daddy, right?

You're gonna see
the hospice nurse today,

and then you have
to tell the doctor,

and then the clock starts.

- But you'll be
in a much better place

'cause you'll be home.

- Yeah.
- Don't you think?

It'll be less torture
to be alive when you're home.

- Yeah.

♪

There we go.
We got you.

We got you.
We got you, Daddy.

Nobody's gonna let it
happen to you, okay?

Nobody's gonna let
anything happen bad to you.

Okay, nice and clean.

Let's move him in
a little bit more.

You gotta pull.

Yeah, I got him.

One, two, three.

There we go.

♪

- [indistinct]

- [grunts]
Ah.

♪

- Do you feel, for any reason,
that you being here

is a burden
to your family or...

- You know you're a burden.

So how do we feel about that?

- Well, the kids and I
tell him he's not a burden.

But in my heart, it's been
a very, very, very rough year.

That's why I've got a belt on.

I mean, I'm a broken woman.

♪

- He really doesn't want
to go to a home.

And he knew that the situation
at home couldn't continue,

because he was, like,
a fall risk,

and he was gonna break
Mom in half,

like he already
has broken her a lot.

- He fell so many times.

And I was always calling
the children to please come

and get Daddy off the floor.

- Every couple of weeks,
I get a call,

maybe 11:00 at night,
just gotten into bed.

I'm, like, going to sleep.

The phone rings,
and it's like,

"Dad's on the floor.
Come over."

- It was just awful.

And it was COVID,
so Ondi insisted

that we were gonna Zoom
for my birthday.

I thought
it was a family Zoom,

but I didn't want to Zoom.

- I wanted to die.

- ♪ Happy birthday to you

- I didn't know she had
set up dozens of friends

all over the country.

- I started to say to Eli,
"I wish I was dead."

- Aww.

- And then I saw all of you.

Thank you so much.

- Yeah.
- Wow.

- Yeah.

Okay, he has to be able
to take the medication himself.

You can prepare it.

You can put it
in front of him.

But you can't participate
in him ingesting it.

- Okay.

At any time,
he can change his mind.

Just because he goes
through the approval process,

he can change his mind.

He could say,
"You know something?

Now I know I can do it.
I'm fine."

Sometimes it's knowing
you have some sort of sense

of control back
when you have no control.

Anyway,
so Dr. Bracht is gonna come.

He's gonna assess him.

And then what happens
is the time starts,

and there's
a 15-day waiting period.

This whole End
of Life Option Act

is still in its early stages.

And so, you know,
it's really something

that opened all
of our eyes about--

we don't call it
assisted suicide.

We call it, you know,
supporting the right

to terminate your life,
right to die.

So we believe in that.

♪

And what's interesting
is what people have done

in exercising that option
has been spectacular.

It's been truly amazing.

- We don't get a choice
on how we come into this world,

but we should have a choice
on how we go out.

- Right.

- It just says,
"An aid-in-dying drug

to end my life in a humane
and dignified manner."

- "I, Eli Timoner,
am an adult of sound mind

and a resident
of the State of California."

Okay, baby.

You're gonna initial,
put your "ET."

- Over here,
where my finger is.

That top line.
"ET."

Okay.
Phone home.

- On the 15th day,

Dr. Bracht will come in
and do another visit.

But in between there,
another doctor will come in

and either agree
or disagree with Dr. Bracht

to see if it's okay
to take the medication.

- There's three doctors
that work with this company,

Faith & Hope,
and I'm the one that...

- Does this.
- Is writing the script.

- It was something that--
yeah, in my heart,

I'm okay with it.

- Well, it's interesting.

Your dad has the impression
that his condition is COPD.

And in all the notes that I got
from the other doctors,

it's CHF,
or congestive heart failure,

with COPD as well.

Your dad made
the first request.

He said, well, quality
of his life is "shitty."

There has to be a second
request after 14 days.

- Yeah.

both: It's Rachel.

- Hi, hi, Dad.

You're looking good.

- He's right here
in the main room.

Look.
- I know, well done.

Well done.
I see that.

- Yeah, now he's
in the swing of things,

right in the middle
of everything.

- Yeah.
- Eating again, and visiting.

And he even had a sip
of wine last night.

- Oh, nice!

All right, it was
a big day on MSNBC today.

- You want to tell Rachel how
you think Trump should go out?

- How should Trump go out, Dad?

- Oh, God, okay, I don't
really want to hear this.

- Oh, no, okay.
You know what, that's okay.

I don't need to know.
It's okay.

I understand
that you would like him

to die a terrible death.

We're done.
We're good.

- Well, that--
I support that.

There are less violent ways
to achieve that,

like just banning him
from Twitter forever.

But okay.

Thanks for sharing
that with me.

- I'm so glad.

That was long-awaited.

I'm glad
that that finally happened.

And what did you decide?

- And what I love about that
is that it's your decision,

and that we can all
support your decision.

- Oh, no wonder, Dad.

- So, Dad, you think
March 3rd is the time?

- Why don't we plan,
like, a nighttime--like,

a nighttime schedule?

And if you can't do it
sometimes, that's okay.

But--
- What's good for you?

- Like, if we could do 9:30,
that would be ideal for me.

- Right, great.

- Dad, does that
sound okay to you?

- Oh, it's while
Rachel Maddow is on.

- Oops.

I can't interrupt
Rachel Maddow.

Gotta have your priorities.

I mean, I--the idea
of taking Rachel Maddow away

from you in your last
couple weeks of life,

that would be so wrong.

- [laughing]

- I feel like I feel like
I share write her right--like,

I should write her now saying--

- "My father has said he can't
talk to me nightly at 6:30."

- Yes, as he's dying,
as he's dying.

Dad, would that
make you happy?

[bird calling]

- Why are you doing that?

- You can't be peaceful--
just lie there and be peaceful?

- Seeing people like you
and visiting with friends

and family is his great joy.

And maybe once in a while,
a little food, right, Daddy?

Some chocolate ice cream?

- I love you.

And I wish you a happy journey.

And maybe I'll see you--

- I'll see you in heaven.

- You'll be waiting.

- Goodbye, honey, bye-bye.

- We're logging off.
- I'll see you again.

[bell tolling]

- Hi, Daddy-O.
How are you doing?

You seem a lot better
today than yesterday.

- Can I pull the chair up?

This one--oh, this one?

- Yeah.

- Oh.

- I'll hand it to you,
but don't take any more, Dad.

♪

- You take too many
Xanax yesterday?

Is that why you were out of it?

- There she is.

♪

- Hey, Dad.

Aww.

Yeah.

I think Mom's
going through a lot

because obviously,
her husband's dying,

and they've been married
like 50-plus years,

so this is huge.

But also,
I don't know if it's guilt,

but there's--it's mixed.

She wanted him to go to a home

because she
couldn't take care of him

because it
was breaking her down.

So I think she's quite torn,

and I think she is
in some sort of denial.

Yeah, you like it?

- He's liking it.

When did you guys move
from Brooklyn to Woodmere?

How old were you?
Do you remember?

- Oh, okay, so you don't really
remember Brooklyn too well.

[laughter]

- What?
I didn't shit my pants.

- Oh, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

- Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- We were doing little arts
and crafts in preschool,

and I stuck one up my nose.

[laughter]

And then it didn't come out,
and I thought, well,

I'm not gonna tell anybody.

[laughter]

- I can't believe
this whole thing,

this whole 15 days--
that this is happening.

I mean, it's just--
there's an unreality to it all.

Yeah?

- And was just going one foot
in front of the other.

- You don't even know what
to expect, how to feel.

- There's no rehearsing it.

♪

- You're gonna
sleep well, Daddy?

- What are you
gonna dream about?

- Really?

- I love you, Daddy.

- Hm.

- I do love Morgan.

- She does love me.

She knows I'm
crazy wacky doodle.

- You hear that, babe?

- Did you hear that?

Morgan would love it
if you did that.

We'd love it if you did that.

- She'd love it.
She said so.

- Aww, Daddy.

- Yeah, he's got plans.

He's always got plans, huh?

- He's always got a plan.

Even when you were
in the hospital last week,

you had plans to make
reparations for slavery

and all of the abuse
and murder we've perpetrated

on Native Americans.

Right, Daddy?

- You do have that plan, right?

- You want me to record
you explaining it

so that we can show it to them?

- All right,
let's do that tomorrow,

and you get some
rest now, okay?

- Eli was a philanthropist.

He was named a pillar
of society by United Way

because he gave to everybody.

He was on the board

of the Fine Arts Museum
in Miami.

And Daddy went to work
at the federation,

became vice president,

and he would raise
millions of dollars.

He was very good
at raising money

because he was giving money.

It's no wonder Eli feels
he could get his plan

to Joe Biden because he knows
Joe Biden from the '70s.

- ♪ Why not
just try a little kindness? ♪

♪ Try a little kindness

- Eli started an airline,

and it became the fastest
growing airline in the world.

- "Fly a little kindness"
became the theme of 1979.

How in the hell did you come up
with all these things, Eli?

- Founder and president
of Air Florida, Eli Timoner,

now confidently boasts...

- Timoner's also beaming
like a proud father

over Air Florida's profits.

- He said, "Bernie,
I want to start an airline."

The doctor said, "Steve, you
get up and let Eli lay down."

[laughter]

- In 1972, Air Florida
was not a household word.

Its fleet consisted

of a whopping two
electro prop jets,

which zigzagged between Miami,
Orlando, and Tampa.

But now, the airline is
competing with the big boys.

- Eli believed everyone
in America

should be able to afford
to fly and travel.

So he testified many times
before Congress,

pushing deregulation,

to be able
to lower the air fares.

And deregulation passed.

And he immediately
offered a flight

to New York for $49
and London for $175,

when everybody else
was charging 800.

And he had the first-class
passengers picked up

by Rolls-Royces with boxes
of Godiva chocolates

waiting for them in the car.

There wasn't an empty seat,

and they became the fastest
growing airline in the world.

They just kept buying more
planes and flying more people.

It was 3,000 strong
at the highest.

When it became very big and he
didn't know everybody's name,

it was a little frustrating
for him.

But he certainly did know
all the Miami people.

- Even though
he ran an airline,

he let me sleep in the morning.

And he would drive
the carpool,

get the kids to school.

The mothers
who were part of the carpool

couldn't believe it.

Here's Eli Timoner,

who's on television
a good part of the time,

driving the carpool.

- Mr. Timoner, you're a small,
no-frills airline also.

Are you concerned
that the big boys

are gonna drive you
out of business?

- No?

- Why not?

- And then one day,
he had a massive stroke

from an accident,
and he became paralyzed.

- He had his neck cracked
by a masseur.

No high blood pressure.
No heart history in his family.

No reason to have a stroke
except his neck was cracked.

He ran that morning,

and he also ran
an Air Florida meeting

with all the employees
in the theater,

telling them,
"My door is always open."

And then we went
for his massage,

and life changed forever.

- I didn't know how to process
it as an eight-year-old.

I didn't tell anyone at school.

It was in the paper.

He was a well-known man
in Miami.

People would say,
"How's your dad?"

I'd say, "Oh, he's fine.
He's fine."

I don't know if it was ashamed
or just terrified,

but I didn't want
to go to that place

where I'd have
to talk to my friend

about what happened to my dad
'cause I was so scared.

So maybe that's why
I'm an emotional zombie.

I don't cry.

You know, I tear up maybe
in a Pixar movie, like,

like, know, once,
but that's it, you know.

- I used to go to help him

with physical therapy
in the hospital.

Here he was,
terrified, shaking,

being yelled at
to move his left arm,

which was paralyzed,
and he couldn't.

I had never felt so small
and so afraid.

Something changed in me.

And I looked at my dad,
and he saw my eyes,

and I said,
"Dad, it's gonna be okay.

It's gonna be okay.

You could just reach out
your arm and hold my hand."

He, seemingly without effort,
moved his left arm

in an arc over his head
and held my hand.

♪

And he's never been able
to do that since then.

When I ended up realizing
that I wanted to be a rabbi,

a lot of it was recalling
this experience

and realizing
that I had had this feeling

of spiritual connection
since then.

[upbeat music playing]

♪

My whole path, my whole path,
has been because of him.

My dad, he was running
a roofing business,

and he had two unions.

There was
a white workers union

and a Black workers union.

And my dad, as a businessman,
just was like,

"That makes no sense."

This was in the 1960s
in Florida,

so it was
the segregated South.

He would never have talked
about it as justice.

He wasn't, like, an activist.

He did that because
he just--it was decent.

It's what you do.

[upbeat music]

I think part of what makes
me dedicate myself so much

to what's wrong
in the world is

that Dad lived the second half

of his life beset by shame,
and a sense of failure,

and a sense of unworthiness
because of the discrimination

he faced as a disabled person.

And I absorbed that.

He was the chairman
of the board

and the CEO of the airline
he founded,

and the board of directors
that he had handpicked

told him that they needed him
to resign

because it was bad
for the company for the CEO

to be in a wheelchair.

And that would be illegal now.

[soft music]

- He provided pretty well

until you were all
out of the nest,

and we came up short of money

for David's graduation
from Yale.

- I graduated from college,

and I didn't have a diploma
in my little blue, like,

leather-bound diploma book.

- They gave him
an empty envelope

because we had
to pay the final bills.

And things were
getting pretty tight.

- That wasn't as traumatizing

as when we thought
my car was stolen.

Dad, being this guy
who wanted to always provide,

was like, "I'll lease
your car in my name.

You know, I'll pay
your lease payments."

So he was getting
these lease payment bills,

and he wasn't paying them.

He couldn't pay them

'cause he was falling
behind financially,

but he wasn't telling me.

And so one day,
my car was gone,

and I thought someone stole it.

And then it turned out
it was repo-ed.

- When we had
to declare bankruptcy,

that's when I went on Prozac.

- It's like,
he wants to be on top of it,

but he doesn't have the means
to be on top of it.

- Daddy kept insisting
I buy lotto tickets,

which I never expected to win.

I've never won anything.

But because he felt
some hope in that,

I did it for him.

- He fell from the heights.

He was meeting
with prime ministers,

and princes, and presidents.

And then he lost
all his wealth.

He lost all his income.

He lost all his status.

He just never complained,
kept going, kept loving us.

[phone dialing]

[phone line trilling]

- Welcome to Bank of America.

Let's try again.

Please say "repeat that"
or press 1,

"hear more" or press 2.

Here are
your recent transactions,

looking as far as back
as November 12th.

On February 18th,
a debit card purchase

for $36.35 from Rite Aid.

On February 5th,
a keep the change transfer

from this account for--
you can say "repeat."

- Well, what are we talking
about, in terms of time?

How long will it take?

- I would say,
give it about three hours,

but remember
he could go really fast,

so I just don't know.

- Bracht.
- Holger Bracht.

- He always remembers
doctors' names.

- And March 3rd is
Holger Bracht's birthday.

- He wants that day.
Remember, Daddy?

You're dying
on the doctor's birthday?

- I wouldn't want
to see it delayed.

It's no life for him.

- That said, we're not sorry
about the 15 days, right?

I mean, it's giving us a chance
to be conscious and thoughtful

about his departure,
and for him to say goodbye

to lots of people
that mean a lot to him.

- Yeah.

- So many people that he
impacted through his life.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- Actually, Daddy,
let's make that list

of who you want
to say goodbye to,

so I can schedule it.

- I mean, to know this
is coming is a luxury.

- Yeah.

- And to have him sharp.
- Yeah.

- You must have several
Alzheimer's patients.

- Yeah.
- That's heartbreaking.

- They don't get this choice.

They can't have any
cognitive issues at all.

Otherwise, they don't qualify.

- I think it's really
courageous work you're doing...

- Thank you.

- Being a hospice nurse
and doing end of life.

- I was telling your mom,
not all doctors will do it.

Not all pharmacies will
participate in the medication.

And not all nurses would do it.

So, I find it very genuine,
what I get to do,

and very honoring,
what I get to do.

Is it hard?
Yes.

Does it get any easier?
No.

And the moment
it does get easier

is the moment
I need to change careers

'cause I don't ever want
to lose that humanity in me.

- Yeah.

[soft music]

- Yes, we do see you.

- Yes.

- That's right.

That wasn't a good flight
for Karen

because she forgot
to latch one cabinet.

And if you'll remember,
when we landed,

all of the galley equipment
came out of that cabinet

and crashed onto the floor.

It sounded like an avalanche
in the back.

- There's my hero.

- How are you doing,
my darling?

- I'm telling you,
before you called,

I was outside on the patio,

having a glass of wine
and a cigarette.

I know,
but all I could think is,

this is like being called to
Eli's office back in the day.

I'm nervous.

[laughs]

I have to tell you the truth.

When he would call me in there,

it was usually because I
needed to do something.

It was,
"Now, we're gonna get DC-9s.

Can you train them?"

"Now, we're gonna get a DC-10.
Can you train that?"

And it didn't matter
how concerned I was,

he was like,
"Oh, you can do it.

I know you can do it."

And we did it, didn't we?

- Well, that's because of you.

When I got to be an executive,
all I wanted to do

was be as good as your dad,
to be honest.

It was,
can I please lead that way?

- Even the way he's doing this.

- Yep, it's the bravest
thing I've known.

- Eli, say goodbye and tell her
you love her and all the rest.

[laughter]

- I love you, my darling hero.

You are my hero.

♪

- Okay, and then you know,
one day, one day,

I will join you,

and we're going
to drink milk and honey,

and drink Red Stripe beer,

and listen
to Jamaica reggae music.

- Okay.

♪

- Hello.

I wanted to ask you
a couple things.

- Are you scared of going?

- No?

Remember when you were
in hospital before.

You weren't ready
to go then, were you?

- No.

So what's made
the difference now?

- Confidence.

- I said I wouldn't cry.

- It's okay to be a crier.

- Yeah, I just have such
an issue with people dying.

- Thank you.

- I'll miss you too.

But, I mean, I kind of think
that I'm of the belief that,

you know, people who die
are never really gone.

What would be quite nice
is if you--Ondi, you--

and your dad discuss something
which you could

identify him as, you know?

- Yeah.

- You're not gonna come back
as a horse's ass.

What I'm saying is--
but some way that you can

let us know that you're there

and you're communicating,
you know?

- Oh, yes, I know.
We do believe in you.

But we want to know, you know.
We want to know.

- I think she wants a sign.
- We want a sign, you know?

- Okay.

- Oh, yeah, I think you will.

- I'll miss you too.

- Yeah, I will.

♪

- Another sip of clam chowder,
Daddy, or Ensure?

- Sweetheart, it's time to talk
to Patti O'Kane in England.

Are you up for that, baby?

- Okay, great.

- Hi.

- There's Patti.

- Hello.

- What a pretty girl.

You joined us as Eli embarked
on this 40-year journey

where he couldn't
use his left side.

- Is that 40 years?
- It's 40 years, 1982.

- Oh, my goodness.
- Yeah.

You were just 18, right?

- Yeah.

My own dad was--
well, he was an alcoholic,

so he wasn't a good dad.

And Eli was the first person
that I saw.

Such a wonderful father.

- I think Patti's crying.

- Just the kind of father
you would want for people.

Just always so kind,

not just to me
but to everybody.

- I love you too.

Have a good rest.

- How you doing?

- That's good.

Your hand is so bruised.

- That's from the IV.

- Yeah.

♪

- Know this turkey is

the same size and...

- Same weight.
- Same weight as me.

♪

- Love you, Eli.

- Yeah, David and I
have been tweeting lately

because we're both
big crypto junkies.

- That's right.

- Seems like it.

- I find all your stories
so interesting, Dad.

But it sounds like most
of the Timoners

were pretty accomplished.

Was it--or not really?

- No?
Just your dad?

- None of the--most
of the Timoners did nothing?

- All the way in.

- I guess.

99, I've never even seen that.

- I have 100!

- How are you, sir?

- This is from Langer's.

- Mm-hmm.

- Aww.

- Hi, beautiful.

- Hi.

♪

- I love you too, very much.

- Mm-hmm.

- Hmm?

This light.

- I'll tell you, when I go
out there in the morning

and he's lying--has been alone
all night in the living room,

and I'll see that his glass
of water has been knocked

off the table
'cause he reached

for it and knocked it over.

And I give him a sip of water,
and he's glad

to see me in the morning,
and the day begins.

But it's really sad.

- Oh, sure.

I'm on my way over there
right now, actually.

You want to email it?

- Well, I mean, good.

Today's
the second doctor visit,

and it's the doctor who's
not a believer in end of life,

so I don't know how
that's gonna go.

But I just can't believe
there's only a week left.

- I know.

It feels really strange
to think

that all the information
in his mind

is just gonna, zap,
be gone, you know?

- Yep.

- So tell me when you're
coming, and I'll film it.

I'd love to.

- Okay, thanks.

- Okay, that sounds good, Dave.
Love you.

- Hey, Daddy, we have to meet
with this other doctor now.

He's gonna give
a second opinion

on whether you're
of sound mind and qualify

for end of life option, okay?

- I understand that you're,
you know,

going through
the end of life option.

- Eli, I'm just gonna ask
you a couple questions.

Right now,
do you know what day today is?

♪

- Okay.
And did you have any lunch?

Are you able to get up
and move around?

- He can't get out of bed.

- He is forgetful, but his
long-term memory is fabulous.

And he still is able
to make his needs known.

- Yeah, he's determined.

- Okay, all right, well,
we'll talk to Dr. Bracht,

and he's gonna make his visit

in another four
or five more days,

and we can go
from there, okay?

[laughter]

- Do you think
that doctor can prevent Eli

from getting the medicine?

♪

- Daddy, are you ready
for the obituary?

Draft one.

We can make any changes

that you feel
you need to make, okay?

- Great.

"Eli grew Laura Lee Candies
into a thriving business.

"He opened the factory
every morning

and began the day with"--
how much chocolate?

- Yum, okay.

"It was during
Giffen's meteoric rise

"that Eli met Elissa Doane,
a receptionist, model,

"and fellow New York transplant
who was a neighbor

in his Biscayne Bay
apartment building."

I really want to say they
married on December 4, 1966.

- After Dad played
two sets of tennis.

- Two sets of tennis.

- When I met him,
he was so beautiful.

So full of life.

Took the stairs two at a time.

Never sat down.

He was brilliant, sweet,
modest, generous, kind.

We married in '66.

Those were idyllic years.

I mean, they were probably
too good for any two people.

The children came
four years into it,

and we were the talk
of the town

'cause I was always pregnant
for like 27 months straight.

We were happy.

We were a happy fivesome.

And life was just a dream.

When Daddy had
his stroke in 1982,

we banded together
as the T Team.

The kids got me a license plate

for the front of my car,
"The T Team."

And we began
running races together

to show we will overcome.

Yeah, we became
a band of four,

holding up our dad.

- Maybe we should add that
you ran track in high school.

Were you a track star?

- You're almost
at the finish line, Dad.

You know what today is?

- You're gonna reach
the finish line

one week from today.

Can you hang in
there till then?

♪

- You can see how the pieces
are coming together, right?

We know what we gotta do.

That this could be something
that feels like history.

You can see the concept
of how this could become

something that we could...

- Here's Daddy.

- Get levels of transmission
down low enough...

- Here's Daddy.

- Hi, Dad.
Guess what I have for you.

You ready?
Can you see?

- Okay, here goes.

- It's Rachel
Maddow from MSNBC.

- Your daughter, Rabbi Rachel,

reached out
through some mutual friends

and found me to tell me
that you have been

watching
"The Rachel Maddow Show,"

watching me on MSNBC,

religiously--
small R, religiously--

and that this might be
a good time

for me to reach out and say hi
and to say thank you.

So this is hi,
and this is thank you.

I know that this has been

a really,
really difficult time.

It has been a difficult time
for the world

and for the country,
but for you in particular

these past weeks and months.

And I just want to tell you
that you're in my heart

and you're in my prayers.

- Thank you for paying
attention to me.

And I'm just hoping
you'll let me pay a little bit

of it back to you now.

God bless you.

- Aww.

- Beautiful.

What do you think, Daddy?

- Sorry about the delay.

Daddy has a catheter in,
and it leaked.

Mom's coming.

She's walking
Dad's morning caregiver out.

- They bought us a double plot,

where one of us
is on the bottom,

and the other one's on the top.

Eli, when he heard that
he'd be waiting for me,

and he'd be on the bottom,
he said, "That's heaven!

I love Lisa on top.

[laughter]

- That looks like
a former tennis player

I used to play tennis with.

- Yeah, Eli, I remember

when you had the biggest serve
in tennis.

I don't know
if you knew that, Ondi.

- Okay.

- That's right.

Donny Lefton came
on his motorcycle.

And he's still riding
his motorcycle around.

- I love you, Eli.

- Yeah, Lisa,
give him a big kiss for us now

from the three of us.

- Good?
- Nice.

- Mwah.

- It's been good being
a co-grandfather with you.

Happy trails, sir.

- He's gonna say goodbye again.

- Goodbye, Eli.
We love you.

- That's a great question.

I don't know the answer.

What would you like
to have happen?

- They will make sure of that,

that you will
no longer be alive

when they close up the box.

- You want to blow
her a kiss, Daddy?

- Oh, yes!

[birds chirping]

- It just means so much to us
that you've been through this

with your own father.

Even though it was Vermont,

I'm sure there's some insights
you can share

on what we can expect
on March 3rd.

- If you have the instructions,
I can look at them

and let you know anything
that I--

- They gave me a couple pieces
of paper.

Why don't we take
a look and then,

yeah, I was gonna
practice dad drinking

'cause he needs to be able
to do it himself,

if you want to help out.

- That's a really
important piece.

- Okay, thanks, cuz.

Love you.
- I love you too.

- Hey, Daddy, Dana's here.

- Hi.

So what I would say
that seems similar

is that
the anti-nausea medication

that came before
made him really sleepy.

My dad.

So I would just say
that any conversations

you want to have,
just make sure to have those

before he takes
the anti-nausea medication.

- He has to hold the cup
in his hand and--

- I think we should just
use one of his big straws,

the straws that he's using
with his Ensure.

- Not allowed.

- We had to break up 100 pills.

- Wow.

- It was not
an elegant solution.

- And he had to hold it, right?

- He had to hold it.

- Daddy, try to hold that
in your hand, yourself.

Can you?

Okay.

- Hmm, maybe a lighter cup.
- He's gonna have to.

- A lighter weight.

- Even if you have
a plastic cup, I wonder.

- Hold that, Daddy.

I just want to see if
the width of the cup is good.

- Okay.

Think something
more narrow, Daddy?

- Hello, Daddy.

- Here, try this one.

- Sit you up.

- The straw--

- Okay, so a shorter straw.

- A shorter straw.

- All right, let me
try again, Daddy.

And let's try it
with some clear liquid.

- That's probably a good idea.

- All right.
Here we go, Daddy.

♪

- There you go.

♪

- That's great.
All right.

Okay.

- Should we do the meeting
about finances stuff?

- Let's do it.
- Oh, man.

- Mom, it's gonna be so easy.

You've got, like...

- We're just gonna talk--
- A few bills.

- Now, why am I
gonna be doing this?

- If you ever want
to know how much money

you have in the bank.

- You might want to check that,

or are you just gonna call
David to find out?

- I mean, why do you want--
- Or you could--

- I like option two.
- Hear that?

- What?
- She's gonna call you.

- [laughs]
- Oh, my God.

- All right, do you want
to tell us what you're doing

so that Mom knows how to do it?

- Yeah, write down the numbers.

- Where are the bills
that we have?

- So we have--
Daddy, we have Spectrum.

- Was there anything
that you can remember that was,

like, a unique charge?

- 65 a month.

- Yeah?

- Yeah.

Anything else
you want us to know?

- 85 a month.

- 21st Century.

Have you had a chance
to have loving times with mom,

just you and her,
these last couple days?

- No?
Not yet?

- I know you do.

She loves you too.

- To Mom.
- To Mom.

- She's the rock.
- To Mom and Pop Pop.

- Mm-hmm.
- And to Pop Pop.

- Yeah.

- For his generous,
and loving, and humorous self.

[laughter]

♪

- He's like this great tree
I've been able

to take shade under,
which I won't be able

to take shade under anymore.

Oh, you see the tree over him?
- Yeah, yeah.

There's a story in the Talmud
about a person

who's on a journey,
and they're thirsty,

and they're hungry,

and they come
to a beautiful tree.

And the tree has deep roots,
and it's tall,

and it's got wide branches,

and beautiful foliage,
and fruit.

And the person spends
some time there in the shade,

cools down and rests,

leaning against the trunk
of the tree,

and eats the fruit
of the tree and rests there.

And when the person's
totally replenished,

they say to the tree,

"You have blessed me
with so much.

"With what can I offer
you my thanks?

"There's nothing
I can offer you

"because you
already have a tall trunk,

and you
already are so sturdy."

Here is my blessing to you.

May your saplings
be just like you.

- Hear that, Daddy?

- Each one of us carries
so much of you.

You did pretty well
with the saplings,

don't you think?

[laughter]

- Do you think
that you have a soul?

- You haven't given
thought to that?

- One thing he's been clear
about since I was ordained

was that he wanted me
to do his funeral.

He didn't want any other rabbi
to do his funeral.

I knew from the first time
he asked me

that it wasn't what I wanted.

As he's getting
closer to death,

he is more and more often
calling me his rabbi,

which is surprising to me
because as he's getting closer

and closer to death,
I am more and more clear

that I'm his daughter.

So I'm gonna go there
and be his daughter,

but when he needs me
to be his rabbi,

I'll be his rabbi.

♪

When I first told him
I wanted to be a rabbi,

he didn't support it.

I think that now, as he's
nearing the end of his life,

it's becoming
really meaningful to him

that I've put a lot of my time
into this kind of moment

and the deepest questions
about life and death.

♪

- Can you take one
that big again,

or should I make it smaller?

Look who's here.

- Hi, hi.

- Hi, Dad.

So nice to be with you now.

- At long last.

So, Dad, I heard
that you wanted me

to give a full eulogy
at the funeral here.

And I wrote it on the airplane.

- Is it truthful?

- I aimed to be very,
very precisely truthful.

Yes.

- You're crying inside?

Why are you crying?

- After the stroke?

- And feeling like a failure.

- I understand that.

♪

- The T Team has reassembled
to help Daddy

on to his next adventure.

♪

- Hi.

- Ondi is just so worried

that I don't spend enough time
squeezing your hand.

That bothers her.

I'm here.

- Pretty tall.
- Yeah, she's tall.

Adores her brother.
- Okay.

- And you can see her brother
is the sweetest kid

in the whole world.

- Peaceful.
- Hi.

- [laughs]
I don't mind.

I love him.
He knows I love him.

She's the director.

- What is it about?

- I'm spending time--

- You want to say
something to me?

I'm an old shoe,
don't you understand?

- You want to say
something to me, baby?

- I'm his slipper.

- Comfy.

- I think she
doesn't know what--

I think she needs
to really allow herself

to feel what's happening.

- Uh-huh.

- I think
she's really scared of it.

I don't know, probably fear.
I don't know.

But she's just wrapping
everything in a story.

You know, she's--story, story.

- And chatting.

- Right.

And he said, "No, I haven't."

And, so I thought--

- All right, I love you.
I'll see you soon.

- Okay, bye.

♪

- There he is.

- Hi.

- I'm good.
Just doing some work.

I saw you getting
some ice cream.

That looked good.

- Sounds like a pretty nice
life right there.

- Ready for some more?

Yes, you are.

- There's more.

- Another dish.

- I mean, why not, really?

- You want to get to talking?
- Sure.

- So, Dave--

- Dad, we're gonna have
a little conversation

about how we're gonna
remember you...

- Yes.
- After you die.

So let's imagine that
the funeral is on Thursday.

The thought that we are having
is that we would be--

just us, right?

It's not on Zoom.

It's not, like,
broadcast to the public, right?

- Right.
- Right.

- And the basics of what you do
at a graveside funeral

in Judaism,
you start out with some Psalms.

You have some time
for remembrances.

You have the prayer
Kel Maleh Rachamim,

which is asking God
to take our loved one

and to take Dad under God's
wings and hold him forever.

And then you have
the physical burial.

And then you say Kaddish.

It is traditional
to participate in the burial.

You actually place the earth
into the grave.

And the more you do,
the better.

So we could be there
for a while,

if we wanted to,
just continuing to do that.

It's kind of like
tucking Dad in.

♪

♪

- If you were
up above the clouds,

and I hope you end up there,

that would be a beautiful place
to be every day.

- I think the world
looks so peaceful

from above, from a plane.

You've been grounded
for so long.

But you know what, you're
not even gonna need a plane.

- You're gonna be able to fly.

- Like a "boid."

♪

- See if that's easier.

♪

- Okay, Daddy,
I'm gonna write your name.

"I, Eli Timoner,
am an adult of sound mind

and a resident
of the State of California."

- I put the time down as noon.
- Yeah.

- It has to be 48 hours?

- Don't time it.
Don't time it.

- Right.
- What is the law?

Why--
- It has to be 48 hours?

I don't know.
- 48 hours.

- Yes, so she--if he wants
to do it at 10:30,

12:00 noon is two hours.

- So the date
today is March 1st.

- Yes, all day.

♪

Already.
- I can't believe it.

It's just so surreal.

I cannot stop crying today.

♪

All right, Daddy.

Let's get this horseshit
over with, again.

All right.

Top, you gotta
initial right there.

Right here.

Up.
Up, up, up, up.

Okay.

See where you're going?
Right here.

Nice one, Daddy.

Very nice.

♪

- Love you so much.

And I'm scared to lose you,

but I know
you're gonna be here still.

- I know.

I know, Daddy.

I'm so happy for you
to have a new adventure.

You loved running around,
and playing, and everything,

and you get to do that again.

- Oh, good.

Oh, good.

[phone rings]
Candice, you gotta go.

♪

- All mic'd up.

How does it feel to be
mic'd up all the time?

Cameras trained on you.

- You don't like it?

- Well, if you don't like it,
you could yank them off.

- Cross the director?

Hey, you're the star
of the show.

- No, he doesn't want
to cross you.

- He likes it
better that it's on.

- Okay, until tomorrow.

- I love you.

- You always made
the best out of it, Dad.

You gave me the best life ever.

I want you to feel
no regrets, okay?

- You want to work with Rachel
and do the viddui now?

Think you have
the energy for it?

- When you die on Wednesday...

- You're going
into another realm.

Yeah?

- And when you go
into that other realm,

we want you to be as free
and as light as you can be.

And so this is
a chance for you

to talk about anything

that still might
weigh you down.

And then you can be forgiven.

And then you can
forgive yourself.

And then, when you die,
you're not carrying any

of that anymore.

- Mm.

That's exactly what we're here
to talk about right now.

You still are carrying shame
from that.

- Those are some big mistakes.

- Mm.

Oh, Dad,
that sounds so painful.

Sounds like
you felt so much shame.

- Yeah.

I'm so sorry.
That sounds so hard.

- You're really angry
at yourself,

and you're really angry upset
that you feel like

you did something stupid.

- Then, you recovered, Daddy,
and went to Air Florida.

- All right.
- Okay.

[speaking Hebrew]

And God said, "I have forgiven
as you have spoken."

Now it is to you
to forgive yourself,

and leave it all behind.

You were not perfect
in this life.

But you were good.

You can leave all
that behind now, okay?

Can you do that?

Can you put it down?

- Good.

- Here you are.
- She brought the wrong--

- Sign here for me.
Sign here for me.

- Sure.

- Thank you.

- Oh.
- Yeah.

I just felt it all just sort
of fall away right there.

I've been having that feeling
of, like, vertigo,

like, my stomach falls
like I'm on a roller coaster,

and I just had
that right there.

- Oh!
- You know?

Diazepam.
Morphine.

- Hazardous drug.
- Wow.

Diazepam, morphine,
amitriptyline,

SyrSpend, Stevia.

- We need to put it somewhere
safe and out of the way.

And they said it's not
to be refrigerated.

Got it.

- When the pharmacy
was saying that we had

to pay for the medicine,
I put it on my credit card,

and then I felt really,
really bad that I was paying

for poison for you.

Are you definitely,
definitely sure

that you want
to take this medicine?

- You're ready to go?

- To the next adventure.

- David has confided in me
that Gigi doesn't want to come,

doesn't want to come,
doesn't want to come.

And of course, we all sensed
it's because Pop Pop's dying.

So after they all left,
Eli said, "I miss Gigi."

- I love standing.
- She likes to stand.

- Oh it's right by this--
- Oh, Gigi!

- She's gonna play
some Rachmaninoff for you.

- Are you gonna sing too?

Wow.

- Okay.

This is "Vocalise"
by Rachmaninoff.

I hope you like it.
It's really pretty.

♪

[applause]

- Lovely.

- Yeah.

- Okay, Pop Pop, you're on.

- I'm ready.

[laughter]

- This guy, a vending machine.

- What was he thinking?
What was he thinking?

- Don't put your penis
in the machine.

- Yeah.
- Okay.

♪

Everybody's with you.

♪

- I told Owen, and I told Gigi
and the other grandkids,

Benji, and Eitan, and Juki,
like, this is it.

You got anything
you want to find out

from your grandfather,
talk to him.

'Cause that's the
amazing thing about him

is he's so lucid right now.

He's always been lucid.

He's always been super sharp.

- The main thing
I wanted to talk about

is I wanted to ask
for advice on, like,

just how to live your life.

- Advice.
Just life advice.

Just how to live in life.

- Mm-hmm.

♪

- No, you didn't disappoint me.

Thank you so much, Pop Pop.

♪

- That is very cool.
- What'd you get?

- That one's really cool too.

- Some Italian--Isaac Zelcer.

- See the tie?
- See the butterfly tie?

It's very, very nice.

It's, like, silk.
You want to feel it?

Feel how soft it is?

- I'll be wearing it
on Thursday.

- Yeah, absolutely.

- Yeah, see you flying off.

Just like the butterflies.

- Yeah.

- Exactly, exactly.

[laughter]

♪

- Hi, Pop Pop.

- How you doing?

- How's today been for you?

- Good.

- I'll be saying--
if only there was

a dime for every time I'd ask,
"What would Pop Pop do?"

you know?

- Can you tell Owen again
your advice about love?

- What do you mean
by the perfect circle?

- Yep.

♪

- That's really good to hear.

- Okay, I'll try.
That's a tall order.

- I want you to
know that I'm not

very good at expressing
myself and being vulnerable,

but I love you so much.

And I just--I feel bad

because I'm,
like, not very good

at expressing myself and stuff,

and I want you
to know how much I love you.

- You look so nice and clean.

- I know.
He's so clean and fresh.

- Such a good man.

I'm gonna thank these people
during your eulogy, okay?

- Bringing up so much.

- As you're coming to the end,
you're remembering everything.

I heard you telling amazing
stories to the grandkids.

Were you able to hear
how your grandchildren

see you as a model
for who to be?

- They really do.

- Do you remember
a couple of days ago

we were talking about
that maybe your assessment

about your life
has been a little bit off?

- Yes.

You know how you're a provider

and what you care about
the most is providing?

What you've provided for us our
whole lives is love and care.

But you know what's
the last thing

you could really provide
for us?

Loving yourself like that.

Really knowing
how good you are.

That would give us all
so much comfort

to know that you were
leaving this world,

putting down all that baggage.

- Good.

'Cause you are a shining light,
and you should know it.

That's what we want
more than anything.

All of us.

Does everybody agree with me?

Is that what we want
for Pop Pop?

- I want nothing more.

- Everybody...

- It's unanimous.

- No, no, there are
no filibusters here.

- Uh-huh.

- That's it.

We did it.

♪

- If you had a chance to stick
around and be in a safe place

we could come visit you,
would you stick around?

- I know.

I'm sorry you struggled
for so many years.

- I feel like I'm--

- There's nothing
to say sorry about.

If this is what you want,
we are all behind you.

But you're saying
you want this, right?

Is that what you're saying?

- You have said it many times.

- No, babe.

This whole year has been cruel
to both of us, and to Cooper.

- Yeah.
Thank you, Cooper.

You've given us everything
your whole life.

That's why you're so loved.

- I love you, honey.

- But you're gonna watch
after me, you said.

- But I'll look for you.
I'll look for signs.

That World War II song,

"I'll find you in the morning."

♪ And when the day is done

♪ I'll be looking at the moon

♪ But I'll be seeing you

I love you, baby.

Thank you for the whole life.

- I'll see you tomorrow, Dad.
I love you.

I love you so much.
See you tomorrow.

- Okay.

- I love you, Dad.

I'm scared of what it's gonna
be like to not have a father.

I've always had him there.

- Love you so much.

But you remember
what I told you.

You have to say goodbye.

Too many people love you.

- What do you think now?

Was I right?

- You matter too much
to so many people.

- Hi, beautiful.

Hi.

How are you feeling?

- Yeah.

- Yeah.

You've done everything you have
to do in this whole life.

You've lived
an incredible life.

And you are cleared
for takeoff.

- [singing indistinctly]

- You know what
I saw this morning?

- No.

- A beautiful peacock,

with the longest tail feathers
I've ever seen.

- Turquoise like silk.

And I walked close to him,
and he didn't--

- He didn't flinch.

And as he walked away,
his feathers looked like waves.

And I thought my Dad's gonna
fly like a beautiful peacock,

up into the trees.

♪

- I'll make sure to take care
of everyone for you.

- Hi, Dad.
- It is David.

- Hi, hi, hi.

- Hi, Dad.

- I'm proud of you.

- Really?

- Hi.

- Thank you.

Very much.

- [singing Hebrew]

- What we want first
is Zofran or Haldol.

- This is the final?
- No, that's digoxin.

This is the Reglan.
- Oh.

- This is the Reglan.
- This is the Zofran.

- This is Zofran.

Wow, that's a lot of powder.

Why are we told that,
once he takes this one,

there's no turning back?

- 'Cause it's gonna
slow his heartrate.

- So he'll just go into a coma.
- Critically.

Yeah.

- Like, if we don't
continue, then--

- He'll just end up in a coma.

- But then we wait
30 minutes for that.

Okay.
All right.

So this is pills.
Pills we know how to do.

♪

Hey, Daddy.
You ready to start?

I've got three pills here

that are
anti-nausea medication.

And it's gonna start the clock.

It's 10:35.

♪

- [singing Hebrew]

♪

- We're gonna pass this around.

And we're gonna each just say
whatever comes to mind,

whatever we want Daddy
to hear and to have

wrapped around him forever.

- As I hold this right now,

and when it's
around your wrist,

for me, what it means is
that we are connected,

that death can't separate us.

I'm so grateful
that I've had you as a father.

I've had a wonderful,
wonderful father.

And you have always loved me.

And that has sustained me
more than you can ever know.

- You've always been such
an inspiration--your bravery,

your honesty.

I feel so empowered by you.

Your legacy is something
that I...

- I will be.
I will live for.

♪

- All right, Daddy.

You've always been my pal.

You always loved us all,
unconditionally,

and I know you hung in there
when you didn't want to,

and I know you
struggled so hard

these last years, especially.

Thank you.

Fly a little kindness
for all of us.

♪

- You are a hero, honey.

- You've been just an
incredible husband and father.

I love you, baby, forever.

- Okay.
This is all of our love.

- Can you tie it?

- All of our love
will be tied around you.

This one, Daddy,
you need to take by yourself.

Okay?

And once you take this,
there's no turning back.

And then the last one
we're gonna take

in 30 minutes from now.

And that one is gonna
be the final goodbye.

That's when
you'll lose consciousness

shortly thereafter,
upon taking that one.

But this one,
you're gonna be with us still.

It's just gonna slow down
your heart.

- Okay, Dad?

- Here, Daddy.
There we go.

- Straw.
- There we go.

- It's all you.
- Okay.

Okay.

There's still some
more there, Dad.

I'm sorry.

[all singing Hebrew]

- Okay, so this goes
into glass.

Just mix approximately
4 ounces of water

or clear juice
with the powder and stir well.

♪

Dump this in?

♪

Wow.

♪

Have a sip of water
or juice in between

can be helpful,
so I'm gonna have--

- The other glass, we can
take and put--when, Candice?

Now?
- Now.

- Hey, Daddy, you ready?

You ready to go?

Here we go.

Okay, we're gonna sit you up
a little bit for this.

This one's a little more
than the last one.

Quite a bit more.

Now, you have to take this all
within two minutes' time, okay?

Somebody start a clock.

Daddy, you tell me when you're
ready to start this, okay?

Because once you start it,
you gotta keep it going.

Okay, Dad.
Hold the glass.

Got it?

Okay, Dad.

♪

You got to get it to your--

- Straw.
- Almost, almost, almost.

A little more to your right.
A little more to your right.

Almost.

- Timer's started.

- Very bitter.
Here, Daddy.

Here, have a sip of water.

♪

Okay.
Gotta take some more.

- [groans]

- I know it's hard.

You gotta keep going, though.

- [groans]

- You gotta keep going, Daddy.

- You got it.
- Keep drinking, Daddy.

- Drink it, Daddy.
- Daddy.

- Believe in you.
- Keep drinking, Dad.

- You got this.
- You're so strong.

- You gotta drink more.
- You gotta hold it up.

- I can't.
I'm not allowed.

But I can hold your hand.

I'm gonna hold your hand.

- Okay, Daddy.

♪

Good job, Dad.

Keep going, keep going.

- Water?

- [coughing]

- Quickly.

- Dad, you gotta do it.

- Here.

So close, Daddy.

One more big sip,
and you got it.

- Get it down.
- Daddy, just get it down.

You got this.

♪

- Okay, that's two minutes.
- Here.

- Okay.

- Just a little less.
- Little bit less.

- Way, way, way less.
- Way less.

Just on his mouth,
just a tiny bit.

- Okay, can we
count that as done?

- Can we count that as done?

- Yes.
- Okay, great.

Okay.

Daddy.
- We love you.

- Here is chocolate sorbet.
- We love you.

- Just here, take that.
- We love you.

We love you.
- Take that.

- Is that better, Daddy?

♪

- Just rest.
- Just rest, Daddy.

- Just let go.
- Let go.

- Okay.

We really can't give him
any more sorbet?

- [coughing]

- The flavor?

- [coughing]

- Take off his oxygen.

- Careful of his ears.

- Okay, Daddy.

It's gone, Daddy.

- Don't worry.

- Just rest now, Daddy.
- Mm-hmm.

♪

- What happened?

No, he's still there.

- Okay.

What time is it?

- 12:10.

- Time of death 12:10.
- That's the time of death.

Yeah.

- Here we go, Daddy.

♪

- Aww, poor Daddy.
- Oh, my God.

Look at those bedsores.
- Poor Daddy.

- Yeah, let's clean you up.

- That looks super painful.

He never even complained.

- Well, he's been
sitting there for--

- Forever.
- No more pain.

- Yeah.
- No more pain.

- Daddy.
- Wow.

His arm is as light
as a feather.

- No resistance.
Like, so--

- Yeah.
- Wow.

What was that weight?

- Probably just gripping.
- Just gripping.

- Pull this down.

- The blanket.
- Pull it down.

Okay.

- He looks beautiful.
Oh, Eli.

♪

- I asked my father
to pray the viddui,

the prayer we say
on Yom Kippur

and just before we die,

which we release our guilt,
and confess our wrongdoing,

and ask for forgiveness,

so we can leave
the world lighter.

♪

Stripped of all status
and dignity,

my father felt a shame so deep
that he came to believe

that he had no worth.

♪

This was the sin he most needed
to confess before he died.

My father's realization

was that he
had measured his life wrong.

He thought his worth
was earned by his success.

And in the last two weeks
of his life,

he saw how loved
he was despite all

of his perceived failures,

and how much his love
had shaped the lives

of the people around him.

♪

On the last night of his life,

his kids, and grandkids,
and my mom sat around his bed,

and we all
saw the change in him.

♪

Just in time,
he started to understand

that the true worth of his life
was measured in love.

And by that measure,
he had wildly succeeded.

We do not have to wait

until the last night
of our lives to know

that we are already loved
and worthy of it.

We do not have to wait
until the last day

to measure our lives by love.

Today, Yom Kippur
is meant to simulate

the last day of our lives.

♪

What if we begin right now?

What if we begin today?

Ken yehi ratzon.

♪

[Merritt Lear and Christophe
Beck's "I'll Be Seeing You"]

♪

- ♪ I'll be seeing you

♪ In all

♪ The old familiar places

♪ That this heart
of mine embraces ♪

♪ All day through

♪ In that small café

♪ The park across the way

♪

♪ The children's carousel

♪ The chestnut trees,
the wishing well ♪

♪

♪ I'll be seeing you

♪ In every lovely
summer's day ♪

♪ In every thing
that's light and gay ♪

♪ I'll always think

♪ Of you that way

♪ I'll find you
in the morning sun ♪

♪ And when the night is new

♪

♪ I'll be looking
at the moon ♪

♪ But I'll be seeing

♪

♪ You

♪

- ♪ Row, row, row your boat
gently down the stream ♪

♪ Merrily, merrily,
merrily, merrily ♪

- ♪ Life is but a dream