All language subtitles for Doom.Patrol.S01E15.BDRip.x265-ION265

- Can you hear me, Mr. Morden?
- Yes.

Cue the recap!
Paraguay vacay made me this way.

A harbinger of chaos
brought to make this geezer pay.

I strung along the dumb patrol,
flipped the bus into a hole,

slammed it shut. Wait, what?
Stuffed it up a donkey's butt!

- Any sign of the chief?
- We know he's alive.

A team was forged
with one belief,

to stop at nothing and get their chief.

Nazi-beating, doomsday-cheating,
beard hair-eating, romance-hating,

punk to skunk, robot chunk,
flashback dancing with a hunk,

gator-baiting, half chub-dating,
sliming through a metal grating,

death cult all around,
Jane survived the underground,

ant farm, Larry harmed,
delivering justice with a swarm.

Father-doting, hand-exploding,

pain obscured through secret coding.

Growing close with each endeavor,
finally they came together.

But I grew bored with this game of chase

and trapped them inside the white space.

Backed their leader against the wall,
forcing him to spill it all.

I was responsible for everything
that has happened to each of you.

This is the best timeline ever!

- Why?
- I needed you.

I wanted...

What you have.

Immortality.

What?

I wanted to...

Ineededto_.

Motherfucker!

I am so sorry.

Liar.

You lied to Jane.

You lied to all of us.

Please, let them go.

What do you take me for, niles?

This was never about them.

Making silly putty out of their fragile,
fractured brains,

well, that...

That was all just...

Extra-curricular.

Consider them abandoned conquests.

Their future is their own now.

God, lwonder what
they'll do with it, hmm?

What does a family do when
they realize they're no family at all?

They're just rats in neighboring cages.

They're just petri dishes
on the same shelf.

You know, I huffed and I puffed,

but it was you all along,
wasn't it, niles?

You destroyed them!

Just like you destroyed Eric morden.

So, you've had your revenge.

What now?

Why,
sky's the limit, old friend!

I'm going to conduct a parade,
I'm gonna guest-host the view,

I'm gonna become the next bachelor!

The world is a golden oyster for me now.

But for you, niles caulder,

I envision a story
that's a little different.

I've been waiting decades
to ask you this.

How does it feel to be a nobody?

Security to containment block seven.

All security to containment block seven.

Good morning, Joshua.

Bureau astronomers have confirmed
your calculations.

Next week's x-15 test flight
is our clearest shot yet

to intercept the space anomaly.

Very good, then.

Meaning, after we
knock this pilot from the sky,

his name is Larry trainor by the way,
captain Larry trainor, wife, two kids,

after we expose him
to unknown space matter,

after we potentially burn
and radiate him

beyond the known limits
of human capacity,

then we're gonna hand him over
to Forsythe and his animals? For what?

And Forsythe will grow bored
with his new toy,

and then he'll be ours,
hopefully forever.

The immortus project is working.

Rita farr has shown
zero signs of aging since 1955.

We already have
a perfectly good test subject.

Now we'll have two.

Where's the line, niles?

'Cause I can't see it anymore.

The only thing
that should trouble you, Joshua,

is the alternative.

Except I don't know
what the alternative is.

The only way I sleep at night
is because...

You tell me nothing.

You're right. And you're welcome.

- Good morning, Larry.
- Apparently, it is.

I've been looking forward to this day
all semester.

My students are finally
performing their scene studies,

and I can't wait to see how they utilize
the techniques that I've taught them.

I suspect I'll be handing out
a lot of a's.

Uh-huh.

It feels so good
to give back to the community.

We should've done this ages ago.

- What?
- Move on.

Six months ago, we learned our
lives had been destroyed by a madman.

Excuse me if it takes more than
a moment to get back my sea legs.

When we moved into this place,
we made a promise to each other.

- I know, but...
- No more hiding.

I know.

I'm trying.

Hmm.

Okay.

What do you think?

You wanna try for 20 seconds this time?

Negative spirit, release!

There you go, buddy.
We can do this.

We can do this. We can...

Hit the bricks, sister.
We're done. Finito.

You don't mean that, Kyle.

I know you better
than you know yourself.

You wanna pick me up
in those strong arms...

Cut. Cut.

Jagger, Esme,

you failed to move your audience.

We didn't feel it
because you didn't feel it.

Mmm? Let me show what it looks like

when you really connect
to your character.

And action!

Hit the bricks, sister.

We're done. Finito.

You don't mean that, Kyle. Hmm?

I know you better
than you know yourself.

You wanna pick me up
in these strong arms

and devour me whole.

And scene.

And that, children,

Is what serious dedication
to your craft gets you.

Being a shitty
high school drama teacher?

Wow. Dare to dream.

It's scary not to excel at something
we aspire to do, isn't it, Esme?

I'm not excelling?

I can't think of anything sadder
than some washed-up never-was

who gets theirjollies
off out-acting a bunch of teenagers

who only took this class for the easy a.

Larry!

Hurry up! You're missing the Booty song.

Do either of you two
want to buy Marvin gardens?

- Honestly, I could use the cash.
- Hmm.

Larry! This is absolutely unacceptable!

1976 is ending, and you're stalling
like some truculent schoolboy.

Mmm.

Now, I believe it's your turn.

I look ridiculous.

No.

Now, then, Rita, that's not fair.

Oh, yeah, sure. Laugh it up.

All right. Keep playing.

And don't cheat.

- He's talking to you.
- Uh-huh.

Forsythe.

What the hell are you doing here?

Wonderful home, Dr. Caulder.
And a happy new year's Eve.

You need to leave.

I'm afraid the matter at hand
is rather urgent.

What is it?

You know, when the brass told me in '68

I'd be losing captain trainor
to your immortus initiative,

I have to say, I couldn't have imagined
his new assignment would be quite so...

Cozy.

Well, you have your methods,
I have mine.

The work we do here
is just as essential.

Yes.

I can see that now.

What is that song?
My daughter likes that one.

Cut the bullshit, agent.

What's that?

Well, I believe you once called it

the "unrelenting, uncompromising
pursuit of truth."

Your signature is required, doctor.

Our investigators have identified
your next test subject.

What are you talking about? I never...

That request was made over a decade ago.

And now we've found her.

Hispanic female,
multiple personality disorder.

By all accounts, a real wildcat!

I think you'll agree,

she fits perfectly the profile
you asked us to find.

Jane.

- Did you know?
- About what?

About what that sadistic fuck did to us,
you fucking...

No, no, no.

He promised!

Jane.

Jane.

Hey, it's okay.

He was going to cage us here.

Cage us like the rest of them.
Wasn't he?

Singing, caged birdies
with pretty feathers

for the master to pluck!

It's okay.

It's okay.

Just tell me, please.

I knew.

I can give you the spiel...

But the truth is I was blind.

Willfully blind.

You need to make it go away.

- I know it's difficult...
- You don't know.

I keep having this dream.

I find a wound on my chest.

This old wound that's scabbed over.

And I know I shouldn't touch it...

But I keep reaching for it...

And I can't help but scratch.

And the wound gets bigger and bigger...

Until there's nothing of me left.

There's a drug.

An opiate.

For meta-human powers.

Niles created it.

Gave it to me for safe keeping...

So he wouldn't be tempted.

It's not a fix or a cure.

It calms the noise,
it makes it more manageable,

but it doesn't discriminate.

Jane, it quiets everything.

The good and the bad.

In order to use it safely...

We'd have to stick to a strict regimen.

I have to monitor your dosage, vitals...

I'm sorry, Kay.

It's okay.

It feels better now.

Niles? Huh?

Elinore? Elinore.

Thank you for coming.

This...

He's my last research subject.

He was a race car driver.

Father.

Husband.

I'm afraid all that...

This is hitting me the hardest of all.

The crash was supposed to be
on the racetrack.

No one else was to get hurt.

No one what?

What does that mean,
he was "supposed to"?

How would you know...

That a man is supposed to crash?

It's all gone too far.

It's all gone too far, elinore.
I used to think I had no alternative.

That there wasn't an alternative,
but it's...

Gone too far.

Niles...

I love you...

As a mentor and a friend.

And you are scaring the
ever-loving fuck out of me right now.

I need to tell you something.

And I need you to promise...

When it's finished...

That you'll still be my friend.

Cliff! Your order's up.

Yo!

You know how much
I cared for elinore.

She would have wanted it this way.

For Victor to survive.

There's some comfort in that.

Cold comfort.

But thank you.

If I may...

One piece of advice.

If there's one thing
I've learned from my research,

Victor is going to need special care.

No offense...

But we are not talking...

About homeschooling
my son's recovery here.

S.t.a.r. Labs has it covered.

I'm not talking about technology
or facilities.

There's a holistic component
to be considered.

Patience. Empathy.

And I'm not capable of giving it.

Is that what you're saying?

No, I'm just suggest...

You might be surprised just how much
of a tonic compassion can be.

And exactly who do you think
you're fooling here?

You talk about compassion? Empathy?

Like you invented it?

I was her husband.

And you don't think
she told me what you did?

You think you have any standing
to lecture me about family?

I just put my son back together.

My son!

And you think
that you and I are the same?

You think what you did...

And what I did are the same?

This wasn't some experiment.

I turned my...

Sweet, affable, athletic,

charming, delicious boy...

Into a freak of nature.

I did it out of love.

Why the hell did you do it, niles?

To those people?

You speak to me about compassion?

Don't ever.

Don't you dare.

Who are you?

Me?

I'm you.

Hey, dad.

You okay, son?

Fine. Um...

Just been up all night
working that bitcoin ring.

Well, you know, if that cybercrime
is too dry for you,

you can always
go back out into the field.

My time's better spent taking down
international money launderers

than two-bit purse snatchers.

- Don't you think?
- Of course.

Either way, I'm proud of you.

I hope you know that.

Sure.

Look, I gotta get back to it.

Is there any sweeter feeling
than revenge?

That's an excellent question, whoopi,

and I don't think that there is.

And the only thing that I'm more sure of

is that it will never, ever,
ever go away!

"A convoluted, meandering plot
that ends in a whimper.

An impotent villain
with a cliche approach to revenge."

You know what, he's right.

He's totally right!

He's totally right.

At long last, I have found you!

Be still, you fudger!
Be still, I say!

Did you just call me a "fudger"?

Silence, recreant!
For this is my time.

I have waited centuries

for the rapture
foretold in the scripture.

Twice, you have brought us to its brink,
and twice, you have failed.

Explain yourself! I demand it!

Well, I was going
for more of a personal tale

of vengeance and betrayal.
You know, emotional stakes.

Real, premium cable shit.

So, you're not
an agent of the lord?

No, there is no god.

If there was,
I wouldn't be so devoid of purpose.

A crisis of faith!

This is why father has led me to you,

to set you back
on the path to his glory!

Path to glory?
Ooh, I like the sound of that.

- To his glory.
- Yeah, that's what I said.

To glory.

But it's no use!

I have already completed
my life's masterwork

by turning everyone
niles caulder loves against him.

There isn't a person alive
that he can call friend.

No man, no woman...

Woman.

I want the truth.

Where is she?

It seems as though
I left some vengeance on the table.

I really gotta amp things up this time,
really make a show of force!

You need guys?

I know a rat
who spent an entire afternoon

exacting revenge
on the robot who killed his mother.

Admiral whiskers?

I love that guy.

This is a splendid start. Who else?

Hmm, you know what?
Let's start small. A Trinity.

Hmm.

I like it. I like it. A ménage-é-us.

And we shall call ourselves
the brotherhood of dangerous animals!

Hosanna!

Yes. It is tight, admiral whiskers.

Yes! And vengeance will be mine!

Again. For real, this time.

And when we get niles caulder again,
the world will be ours!

Then we shall destroy it!

Maybe.

If there's time.

Morning, dear.

We hit 20 seconds yesterday.

At least, I think we did.

I passed out at some point,
but it felt longer.

Bully for you.

Rough day at school?

I was emotionally assassinated
by a 13-year-old girl.

I'm not even sure
what we're doing here, Larry.

We're doing exactly
what we were doing back at the manor,

just getting by.

That's not enough for me. Not anymore.

There has to be more to life
than just this.

We'll be singing

when we're winning

we'll be singing...

- Neighbors?
- Moved last week.

We'll be singing

we'll be singing
when we're winning

do you think old man Arnold can hear it?

Hear what?

Nothing! Have a nice day now.

Eat shit, ginger!

You'll be singing...

- Disembodied singing.
- Never a good sign.

Although, we could follow it,
see where it leads.

It's not like we have much to lose.

No, just our lives.

But, hey, we're living
on stolen time anyway,

so why not take it for granted,
and dive headlong

into shark-infested waters
that will undoubtedly lead us back

to the man who permanently disfigured us
and lied to us about it for decades?

We're the ones who don't get involved.
Remember?

We'll be singing...

No more hiding.

We'll be singing

Kay.

Stay here.

Sweet, sweet baby... baby...

Who's there?

No, Kay. Don't forget.

You can't forget.

I'll get her, Jane.

Don't worry.

Kay...

Come here, monkey.

Sweet, sweet baby... baby...

I know you think
this is how it has to be,

but this isn't healing, Jane.

Forgetting and hiding isn't healing.

You have to go up.

I can't.

We're safer here.

We're happy, aren't we?

I get knocked down
but I get up again

and you're never gonna
keep me down

I get knocked down
but I get up again

and you're never gonna
keep me down

What the fuck!

- Uh, hi!
- What the fuck?

You're the one who's been bringing me
cold food this whole time?

For months?

Um...

Well, yeah, when I'm not busy.
I'm busy a lot, you know.

There just happens to be a food truck
where I'm busy most, and I...

I mean, it's not like
I could eat any of it.

Thanks.

Might be a little soggy.

I tripped. Manhole just came out of...

Do you hear that music, too?

All morning.

You, uh...

You wanna go fuck up
whoever's playing it?

Fuck, yeah!

But I get up again

I get knocked down
but I get up again

and you're never gonna
keep me down

I get knocked down
but I get up again

and you're never gonna
keep me down

pissing the night away

pissing the night away

he drinks a whiskey drink
he drinks a vodka drink

he drinks a lager drink
he drinks a cider drink

he sings the songs that
remind him of the good times

So, my timing
might be shit here,

but I, for one, am grateful
that a disembodied chumbawamba

has brought us all back together.

I get knocked down
but I get up again

and you're never gonna
keep me down

I get knocked down
but I get up again

and you're never gonna
keep me down

I get knocked down
but I get up again

and you're never gonna
keep me down

I get knocked down...

Can I just say there better be
a good fucking reason why we're here.

And it better be
to turn off that fucking song.

Because honestly,
I'd rather stick sharks in my vagina

than be in the same zip code as you.

It's Mr. Nobody. He's kidnapped Danny.

- So, rescue Danny.
- I can't.

I need your help.

A long time ago, I had a daughter.

She's extraordinary
and everything to me...

And I'm afraid...

She is a danger to all of us.

All I ever wanted
was to live one day longer than she did,

to protect her,

to protect others.

That's why I created each one of you.

I needed to study any means possible
of extending my own life.

So, we were lab rats.
Just like Mr. Nobody said.

Yes, at first. I can't deny that.

Okay, I'm sorry,
but invoking your daughter now,

it's fucking evil.

It's the truth.

I hid her for years on Danny,

who graciously accepted
to be her caretaker.

Somehow...

Mr. Nobody...

Has found out about her,

and he's trapped them both
inside this painting.

Please.

She's all I've got left.

Tell you what.
I'll help you with your daughter

as soon as you invent a time machine

that gets me back the 30 years
I lost with mine.

Till then, fuck you forever!

And Danny? You're just gonna
turn your back on them?

Even though they had no part in this?

I'm sorry, what part
of "fuck you forever" was in Hebrew?

I'll do it.

For Danny. Even your daughter.

Not for you.

Wait! You're doing this?

Niles caulder, you're an awful,

vermin-infested, garbage... person.

But so help me,
I'm going into that painting, too.

I was terrible as a human being,
and even worse as an acting teacher.

The only time I don't feel
like a complete asshole

is when I'm dealing with...

Whatever you would call
this foolishness.

Larry.

Does my opinion even matter?

Cliff.

Great! Now I'm the fucking
asshole who's a fucking asshole

if I don't walk
into the fucking painting.

Of course I'm gonna fucking walk
into the fucking painting

because, let's be honest,

who the fuck else
is enough of a fucking asshole

to walk into a fucking painting?

Let's go!

Okay, so get into the painting somehow,

and then rescue Danny
and your daughter somehow.

Getting in is gonna be the easy part.

It's the getting out
that's gonna be tricky.

Why? What do we have to do?

I don't know.
That's why it's gonna be tricky.

Ah, okay.

So, what do we do?
Just stare at this thing?

Keep staring. Keep staring.

I get knocked down
but I get up again

you're never gonna keep me down

where is everyone?

Danny, you okay? What's going...

Uh, can't see. All right.

Danny, what about her? Is she safe?

Uh, guys?

What the hell is that?

Now comes your reckoning!

Oh, god!

Behold! I am his right hand.

His scythe! Use me, father!

I am your disciple, your fifth horseman!

Take cover!

Shit! Shit!

Shit!

Shit! Shit, shit, shit,
shit, shit, shit, shit!

Oh, Danny boy

Danny boy

I'm so sorry, Danny boy!

Oh, my god. Danny was right. You came.

I'm so happy to see you guys.

Man, what the hell are you doing?

I fucked up. I fucked up.

I fucked up so hard.

I was happy here, you know.

This guy shows up, Mr. Nobody,
offering me

bags of Lincoln, Da Vinci, zz top.

Their beards tasted so good.

And I told him.

I told him everything.

You sold her out.

What did you do?

What did I do?

I mean, sure, I trapped Danny
in this goddamn painting

before realizing
that it would turn me into this...

This husk!

All I wanted to do

was to meet
that cro-magnon squeeze of yours,

and lo and behold, all that remains

is an adorable, almighty
chip off the old block.

If you so much as harmed
a hair on her head...

She enlarged
those two backstabbing vermin!

Have you ever tried
talking sense to a pest

while he enjoys his very own
re-enactment of a kaiju movie?

It is impossible!

Shut up! Look, we need a plan.

Look, we were the only people
in this whole entire world

who got Danny's sos
and followed it here.

We're standing inside the heart
of a sentient street,

inside a magic painting
with a giant-ass cockroach,

a guy who hunts beards...

And an inter-dimensional fuck-up.

If anybody's gonna save Danny

and the chief's daughter,
it's gonna be us.

Fine. What's this plan?

This way. Quickly!

She's in the doll hospital,
down the stairs.

That wasn't so bad.

Maybe the giant roach
found a giant turd to chow down on

and forgot all about us.

It's the roach, isn't it?

Oh, fuck my life!

Jane, run!

The fuck!

Come and get it, asshole!

Oh, shit. Oh, shit!

No. Find my daughter.
The doll hospital. Go.

I was supposed to be the villain

of this shitty piece.

I was bested by a little girl,

and thrown out of
my own criminal organization

by a rat and a roach.

The big bad. The black hat.
You can't make this shit up!

Yesterday, a 13-year-old girl

told me to fuck my face
with a weed-whacker.

Congratulations.

We both suck.

That's one way to tell the story.

- It's the truth.
- It's the past.

The future is still yours
for the making.

Why? What's the point?

I know what it's like to be a nobody.

But as bad as that felt,
I'd rather be nobody than nothing.

And that is exactly
what you're going to be

if you don't quit
feeling sorry for yourself.

You don't give a shit about me.

You're only saying all of this
to save your own tuchus.

That is 100% true.

But think about it this way.

If you give up now,
your story is a forgettable,

disappointing defeat,

but if you take up
your narration once again,

you can turn your tale into...

Something beloved by all,

told and retold time after time.

A comeback.

What do you want me to do?

Give me joy in my heart

keep me praising

give me joy in my heart, I pray

There he stood,
anointed with purpose.

Ezekiel!

Born of the most herculean
and timeless of creatures.

Father, is that you?

No.

Ezekiel realized that it wasn't god,
it couldn't be,

because he was god all along.

Huh?

For who else was
more powerful than the cockroach?

Who else could survive mass extinctions,
plagues and nuclear explosions?

No one! Only I, only Ezekiel.

And if he wanted armageddon,

he would have to manifest
revelations himself!

Yes! I am ready!

Now was the time
for the meek to inherit the earth.

It was time for the meek to devour it.

Devour?

Three o'clock. Behind the BMW

why, a god would not be sated
on scraps of guano alone.

Ezekiel had a new appetite.

He desired to eat the world.

Yes!

Now having tasted
the great cyborg,

Ezekiel's craving for power grew.

I am become god!
Destroyer of worlds!

Of all the stupid ways
I expected to die,

getting eaten by a Godzilla-rat
never made the list!

I don't know. Maybe I deserve this.

I was a shitty dad and a worse husband.
Let's see, what else?

Okay, yeah.

But those two other things,
they aren't that bad.

I mean, lots of people
suck at relationships and parenting.

Doesn't mean
they're sucky people, does it?

Because if I had
another chance with Clara,

I know I'd do so much better.

So why shouldn't I get a second chance?

Why do I deserve to be slowly digested
by a giant-fucking-rodent?

Because I don't think I do.
I don't fucking deserve this!

Maybe nobody does.

I do not deserve this shit.

I do not deserve this shit!

I do not deserve this shit!

Okay, you heard Vic's plan.

You're gonna find us a way out of here.
I know you are.

Negative spirit, release!

Hello?

I'm Jane.

Niles sent me to come get you.

Good job. Looks like I'm up.

Just as soon as
everyone's inside the giant cockroach.

Rita!

I know you better
than you know yourself, Ezekiel.

You wanna pick me up
in those strong arms

and devour me whole.

Oh, god. This is gonna be
worse than the donkey, isn't it?

I get it.

I have a friend, baby doll.

She's like us.

She gets scared, too.

And your dad used to sing her this song
that always made her feel better.

I'm a Valiant, little squirrel

I am brave and powerful

no, I'm not afraid of anything at all

I am strong

I am daring

it's not me that you'll be scaring

no, I'm not afraid of anything

at all

Not even a hawk?

With its loud and mighty squawk?

Come, dear.

Shall we go see what the inside
of a cockroach looks like?

Wait, wait, cliff.
What about cliff?

On, shit. Cliff.

I do not deserve this shit!

Ugh! Gross!

Um, okay.

Okay, I'm just vamping here.

Then...

Then Ezekiel noticed whiskers.

I mean, he really noticed him.

Why, he had been so busy

becoming the architect
of the apocalypse and all

that he had failed to see
what was right before his eyes,

but there he was.

Ezekiel's right hand in the destruction
of this loathsome world.

Another meek and forgotten creature.

It was as if a soul
had been split in two,

and they were finding their way
back together again.

The yearning was palpable.
It was intoxicating.

Really? Oh, whiskers!

It was in that moment
that Ezekiel lost all other appetite,

he hungered for one thing

and one thing only,

and that was...

Rat-a-tushie.

Gotta make it
into the cockroach.

Gotta make it into the cockroach.

Gotta make it into the cockroach.

Oh, god! Oh, fuck me!

Whoa!

Now knowing that
his greatest fear

was also his greatest power,

Larry knew it was time to rip through
this impenetrable dimension.

All of the pieces
were clicking into place.

The story's riveting end
was finally upon us.

So, the cockroach eats them
to protect them from the radiation.

I get that. But what happens to us?

Miscreants! Dissenters!
Did they think they could destroy me?

Nay, the apocalypse is my bedfellow.

Nuclear radiation,
a mere gentle kiss upon my back.

I cannot die for I am death!

I am the beginning, the end, the...

Everybody okay?

Nothing that an hour-long shower
and a whiskey on the rocks won't fix.

- Is that...
- Yes.

It's all right, darling.

Everyone...

This is my daughter, Dorothy.

Dorothy spinner.

Uh, guys...

I'm gonna suggest maybe
we deal with the issue at hand here,

and then meet the world's
most powerful little girl.

What the fuck?
Are you fucking kidding me?

Are you fucking kidding me?

Are you fucking kidding me!