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1
00:01:56,082 --> 00:01:57,833
My name is Kathy H.
2
00:01:59,127 --> 00:02:01,003
I'm 28 years old.
3
00:02:04,299 --> 00:02:06,717
I've been a carer
for nine years.
4
00:02:14,100 --> 00:02:16,059
And I'm good at my job.
5
00:02:16,895 --> 00:02:19,688
My patients
always do better
than expected
6
00:02:19,772 --> 00:02:21,773
and are hardly
ever classified
as agitated,
7
00:02:23,276 --> 00:02:26,069
even if they're
about to make a donation.
8
00:02:29,073 --> 00:02:31,033
I'm not trying to boast,
9
00:02:31,117 --> 00:02:34,244
but I feel a great sense
of pride in what we do.
10
00:02:35,246 --> 00:02:37,956
Carers and donors
have achieved so much.
11
00:02:41,336 --> 00:02:43,587
That said,
we aren't machines.
12
00:02:47,133 --> 00:02:49,343
In the end,
it wears you down.
13
00:02:51,137 --> 00:02:55,599
I suppose that's why
I now spend most of my time
not looking forwards
14
00:02:55,683 --> 00:02:57,851
but looking back,
15
00:02:57,936 --> 00:03:01,146
to The Cottages and Hailsham,
16
00:03:01,898 --> 00:03:03,649
and what happened to us there.
17
00:03:05,151 --> 00:03:06,568
Me,
18
00:03:07,904 --> 00:03:09,821
Tommy,
19
00:03:10,490 --> 00:03:12,741
and Ruth.
20
00:03:21,793 --> 00:03:27,381
When we are scattered
afar and asunder
21
00:03:27,465 --> 00:03:32,219
Parted are those
who are singing today
22
00:03:32,637 --> 00:03:37,808
When we look back
and forgetfully wonder
23
00:03:38,059 --> 00:03:42,854
What we were like
in our learning and play
24
00:03:43,481 --> 00:03:48,485
Oh, the great days
will bring distance enchanted
25
00:03:48,850 --> 00:03:53,573
Days of fresh air
in the rain
and the sun
26
00:03:53,825 --> 00:03:58,870
How we rejoiced
as we struggled
and panted
27
00:03:59,038 --> 00:04:05,877
Echoes of dreamland,
Hailsham lives on
28
00:04:12,802 --> 00:04:14,428
Good morning, students.
29
00:04:14,512 --> 00:04:17,389
Good morning,
Miss Emily.
30
00:04:18,516 --> 00:04:22,644
It has come to my attention
that three burned cigarettes
were discovered,
31
00:04:23,021 --> 00:04:26,106
hidden behind a pot
in the flower garden.
32
00:04:28,401 --> 00:04:30,569
I know that on occasion
students have seen
33
00:04:30,653 --> 00:04:34,448
some of the caretakers
and deliverymen
smoking cigarettes,
34
00:04:34,532 --> 00:04:38,994
but I must emphasize,
once again,
that it is much, much worse
35
00:04:39,078 --> 00:04:42,581
for a student of Hailsham
to smoke cigarettes
than anyone else.
36
00:04:44,959 --> 00:04:48,336
Students of Hailsham
are special.
37
00:04:50,256 --> 00:04:54,426
Keeping yourselves well,
keeping yourselves
healthy inside,
38
00:04:54,510 --> 00:04:56,678
is of paramount importance.
39
00:04:57,013 --> 00:04:58,972
Have I made myself clear?
40
00:04:59,057 --> 00:05:01,183
Yes, Miss Emily.
41
00:05:03,978 --> 00:05:07,439
I think, one day,
I'd like five horses.
42
00:05:08,483 --> 00:05:13,195
I don't know all their
names, but I know
I'd like five horses.
43
00:05:13,321 --> 00:05:15,030
The best
would be Thunder.
44
00:05:15,114 --> 00:05:18,283
He'd be dangerous to ride,
so you can't ride him.
45
00:05:19,368 --> 00:05:21,453
You can ride
46
00:05:22,413 --> 00:05:24,039
Bramble.
47
00:05:24,791 --> 00:05:27,876
Just so long as you don't
use your crop on him.
48
00:05:29,504 --> 00:05:31,546
That's pretty.
49
00:05:31,631 --> 00:05:33,048
You have it.
50
00:05:35,718 --> 00:05:38,637
Look. Who's that
with Miss Emily?
51
00:05:40,139 --> 00:05:42,307
Do you think
it's the new guardian?
52
00:05:42,391 --> 00:05:43,558
Miss Lucy.
53
00:05:45,103 --> 00:05:47,020
I think it must be.
54
00:05:47,105 --> 00:05:49,731
We haven't had
a new guardian for ages.
55
00:06:02,161 --> 00:06:04,830
Arthur! Arthur!
56
00:06:08,751 --> 00:06:10,252
Catch it, Tommy.
57
00:06:32,984 --> 00:06:35,569
Why didn't Tommy
get the ball?
58
00:06:37,321 --> 00:06:38,947
Excuse me, Miss Lucy?
59
00:06:39,365 --> 00:06:41,616
Why didn't Tommy
get the ball?
60
00:06:42,451 --> 00:06:43,660
When it bounced
over the fence,
61
00:06:43,744 --> 00:06:45,120
it couldn't have
been far from him.
62
00:06:45,788 --> 00:06:48,165
The fence is the boundary
of the Hailsham grounds.
63
00:06:48,291 --> 00:06:50,959
We don't go outside
the boundary, Miss Lucy.
64
00:06:51,210 --> 00:06:52,961
It's too dangerous.
65
00:06:53,421 --> 00:06:54,880
Dangerous?
66
00:06:54,964 --> 00:06:57,591
There was once
a boy who had a big row
with all his friends
67
00:06:57,675 --> 00:07:00,051
and then ran off
beyond the boundary.
68
00:07:00,136 --> 00:07:04,347
They found him,
two days later, in the woods.
Tied to a tree.
69
00:07:04,891 --> 00:07:06,474
With his hands
and feet cut off.
70
00:07:07,268 --> 00:07:08,518
Dead.
71
00:07:09,312 --> 00:07:11,271
And there was the girl
who climbed over the fence,
72
00:07:11,355 --> 00:07:12,689
by the front gate.
73
00:07:12,773 --> 00:07:16,026
And when she tried
to get back,
she wasn't allowed.
74
00:07:16,319 --> 00:07:18,945
And then she starved.
Out there.
75
00:07:19,655 --> 00:07:21,406
Right by the gates.
76
00:07:24,160 --> 00:07:25,327
Who told you
these stories?
77
00:07:25,870 --> 00:07:27,913
Everybody knows them.
78
00:07:28,164 --> 00:07:29,831
And how do you know
they're true?
79
00:07:30,166 --> 00:07:31,166
Of course
they're true.
80
00:07:31,751 --> 00:07:34,544
Who'd make up stories
as horrible as that?
81
00:08:01,280 --> 00:08:04,074
Tommy, what are you doing?
82
00:08:04,367 --> 00:08:06,493
What is it, exactly?
83
00:08:06,577 --> 00:08:09,371
I think it must be a dog.
Is it a dog, Tommy?
84
00:08:09,747 --> 00:08:12,290
It can't be a dog.
lts eyes are too small.
85
00:08:12,500 --> 00:08:14,876
I think it must be
a kind of rat.
86
00:08:14,961 --> 00:08:16,753
Yes, that's it.
Tommy's drawn a rat.
87
00:08:16,837 --> 00:08:17,921
It's not finished yet.
88
00:08:18,005 --> 00:08:20,006
That's right.
You haven't finished
the whiskers.
89
00:08:20,091 --> 00:08:22,050
Do you think Tommy's rat
will be selected
for The Gallery?
90
00:08:22,134 --> 00:08:23,677
It's not a rat.
91
00:08:26,430 --> 00:08:28,056
It's an elephant.
92
00:08:28,182 --> 00:08:30,058
Children,
back to work.
93
00:09:00,172 --> 00:09:03,300
He's got his shirt on.
His favorite polo shirt.
94
00:09:04,552 --> 00:09:06,928
He really doesn't
suspect a thing.
95
00:09:08,931 --> 00:09:11,224
Looks like no one
wants you, Tommy.
96
00:09:22,528 --> 00:09:24,362
What's he doing?
97
00:09:24,488 --> 00:09:25,864
It's his own fault.
98
00:09:25,948 --> 00:09:29,409
If he learnt to keep his cool,
they'd leave him alone.
99
00:09:29,577 --> 00:09:31,536
I hate you!
I hate you all!
100
00:09:31,620 --> 00:09:32,829
Kath... No, don't!
101
00:09:43,966 --> 00:09:45,759
You shouldn't have...
102
00:10:07,990 --> 00:10:09,824
Kathy H.
103
00:10:23,005 --> 00:10:24,672
What's this from?
104
00:10:25,341 --> 00:10:27,008
I don't remember.
105
00:10:27,176 --> 00:10:29,052
Doctor?
106
00:10:36,352 --> 00:10:38,520
It's nothing.
Just a bruise.
107
00:10:45,111 --> 00:10:46,820
Hello.
108
00:10:47,321 --> 00:10:49,364
Kathy. Kathy H.
109
00:10:50,116 --> 00:10:52,534
Of course. Kathy H.
110
00:10:53,202 --> 00:10:54,744
Come in.
111
00:11:00,751 --> 00:11:02,293
So what can
I do for you?
112
00:11:03,712 --> 00:11:05,171
Well,
113
00:11:06,006 --> 00:11:09,050
I was wondering
what you said to Tommy.
114
00:11:10,177 --> 00:11:12,178
Out on the
playing fields.
115
00:11:12,263 --> 00:11:14,264
I see. Oh.
116
00:11:15,182 --> 00:11:16,850
So what did I say?
117
00:11:19,395 --> 00:11:21,771
I believe I was trying
to calm him down.
118
00:11:21,856 --> 00:11:23,731
Because he seemed upset.
119
00:11:24,233 --> 00:11:27,819
He explained
he was often teased
about sport and art,
120
00:11:27,903 --> 00:11:31,239
so I told him
he shouldn't get upset
about these things.
121
00:11:31,657 --> 00:11:35,285
The other children
are only teasing him
to get a reaction.
122
00:11:37,371 --> 00:11:40,081
And if it happens
that he's not particularly
good at sport or art,
123
00:11:40,166 --> 00:11:42,208
well, that doesn't matter.
124
00:11:43,002 --> 00:11:44,878
It's not so important.
125
00:11:50,593 --> 00:11:52,093
Thank you.
126
00:12:14,825 --> 00:12:16,284
Kathy.
127
00:12:19,288 --> 00:12:20,705
Aren't you sitting
with the girls?
128
00:12:20,789 --> 00:12:21,789
Well, I just checked
129
00:12:22,249 --> 00:12:24,501
and I'm pretty sure
I'm not sitting
with the girls.
130
00:12:24,585 --> 00:12:25,835
I'm sitting with you.
131
00:12:28,130 --> 00:12:29,672
I wanted to say
132
00:12:31,926 --> 00:12:33,593
I'm sorry.
133
00:12:34,970 --> 00:12:36,971
I didn't mean
to hit you.
134
00:12:38,140 --> 00:12:41,726
I mean, I wouldn't
want to hit any girl.
135
00:12:44,522 --> 00:12:46,189
But particularly
not you.
136
00:12:47,650 --> 00:12:50,443
Well, it was
an accident,
that's all.
137
00:12:52,655 --> 00:12:55,240
Tommy,
finish those vegetables.
138
00:13:12,675 --> 00:13:15,093
I'm not gonna get angry
like that anymore.
139
00:13:15,177 --> 00:13:18,972
Because of what
Miss Lucy told you,
about being creative?
140
00:13:19,056 --> 00:13:20,640
How do you know
about that?
141
00:13:20,724 --> 00:13:21,766
I'm nosey.
142
00:13:25,187 --> 00:13:29,399
She can't actually
mean that being creative
isn't important, can she?
143
00:13:29,567 --> 00:13:31,776
I mean, what about
The Gallery?
144
00:13:31,860 --> 00:13:33,861
If being creative
isn't important,
145
00:13:33,946 --> 00:13:35,947
then why have
a gallery at all?
146
00:13:38,742 --> 00:13:40,201
I don't know.
147
00:13:45,207 --> 00:13:48,710
...by arching her back,
or perhaps with the aid
of a pillow,
148
00:13:49,628 --> 00:13:51,629
the woman can
arrange herself...
149
00:14:07,146 --> 00:14:09,814
Smile
150
00:14:23,996 --> 00:14:25,413
Good morning, ma'am.
151
00:14:25,497 --> 00:14:26,664
Good morning.
152
00:14:26,749 --> 00:14:28,249
Can I help you?
153
00:14:28,334 --> 00:14:31,252
I wanted one tea,
with milk
and sugar in it.
154
00:14:32,004 --> 00:14:34,547
One tea. Right.
155
00:14:41,055 --> 00:14:42,597
Tommy.
156
00:14:42,681 --> 00:14:45,266
Oh! One tea with
milk and sugar
in it, please.
157
00:14:45,601 --> 00:14:47,602
No, Tommy.
158
00:14:50,189 --> 00:14:52,398
I want to hear
your own order.
159
00:14:52,483 --> 00:14:54,150
Don't simply repeat
the one you've just heard.
160
00:14:54,943 --> 00:14:57,779
What other drinks
do they serve in cafes?
161
00:14:57,863 --> 00:14:59,197
Water.
162
00:15:02,368 --> 00:15:03,368
Coffee.
163
00:15:03,452 --> 00:15:04,452
Coffee.
164
00:15:06,330 --> 00:15:07,622
So, then.
165
00:15:08,499 --> 00:15:09,791
So, then,
166
00:15:10,959 --> 00:15:13,628
one coffee,
please, with milk
and sugar in it.
167
00:15:19,510 --> 00:15:20,843
Thank you.
168
00:15:29,853 --> 00:15:31,813
I think Laura
likes Arthur.
169
00:15:32,648 --> 00:15:35,274
All the girls like
Arthur, don't they?
170
00:15:36,151 --> 00:15:37,652
Maybe.
171
00:15:39,154 --> 00:15:40,571
I'm not sure you do.
172
00:15:41,949 --> 00:15:44,075
He's not my type.
173
00:15:44,159 --> 00:15:47,412
I think Laura and Arthur
will be the first
in our year to have sex
174
00:15:47,496 --> 00:15:50,957
because, if Arthur wants to,
Laura wouldn't stop him.
175
00:15:51,667 --> 00:15:53,835
I'm sure you're right.
176
00:15:58,173 --> 00:15:59,632
Tommy's changed.
177
00:16:00,634 --> 00:16:02,051
Changed how?
178
00:16:03,345 --> 00:16:04,846
Just changed.
179
00:16:06,014 --> 00:16:07,390
That's all.
180
00:16:37,796 --> 00:16:40,381
What about this one
by Madeleine Kane?
181
00:16:40,758 --> 00:16:44,051
I think it shows more
than technical ability.
182
00:16:44,219 --> 00:16:46,763
It gives a real insight
into the child.
183
00:16:46,889 --> 00:16:49,932
Which is precisely
what Marie-Claude
wants for The Gallery.
184
00:16:50,017 --> 00:16:51,809
Yes, I agree.
185
00:16:55,564 --> 00:16:56,647
Mmm.
186
00:16:57,191 --> 00:16:59,066
Put these
two together.
187
00:17:00,152 --> 00:17:01,778
Madame is coming.
188
00:17:52,412 --> 00:17:54,121
Good morning, students.
189
00:17:54,248 --> 00:17:57,250
Good morning,
Miss Emily.
190
00:17:58,627 --> 00:18:01,337
There are several
points of order today.
191
00:18:01,421 --> 00:18:05,174
The first is that our good
friend, Madame Marie-Claude,
is visiting us.
192
00:18:05,342 --> 00:18:09,554
She will, as usual,
be carefully inspecting
your artwork and poetry
193
00:18:09,721 --> 00:18:13,683
and selecting
the very best pieces
for inclusion in her Gallery.
194
00:18:14,101 --> 00:18:16,561
We will, of course,
extend to her every courtesy
195
00:18:16,645 --> 00:18:19,313
and make her feel
most welcome.
196
00:18:19,648 --> 00:18:23,234
Second point of order,
a piece of good news
for all students
197
00:18:23,318 --> 00:18:26,195
who have been diligent
in collecting tokens.
198
00:18:26,572 --> 00:18:29,407
After studies tomorrow,
there will be a sale.
199
00:18:30,617 --> 00:18:32,994
The delivery
will arrive in the morning,
200
00:18:33,120 --> 00:18:35,454
and I was assured
by the van driver
201
00:18:35,539 --> 00:18:38,791
that the boxes will
contain a bumper crop.
202
00:19:28,550 --> 00:19:30,676
Is it really
a bumper crop?
203
00:19:32,054 --> 00:19:35,473
I should say so.
Yeah, sweetheart.
It's a bumper crop.
204
00:20:40,288 --> 00:20:41,664
Hey.
205
00:20:42,874 --> 00:20:44,542
Aren't you buying?
206
00:20:44,918 --> 00:20:48,379
If you've already
spent all your tokens,
you can have some of mine.
207
00:20:48,630 --> 00:20:52,216
I have tokens.
I was just gonna wait
till the rush died down.
208
00:20:52,300 --> 00:20:55,052
I'm sure there'll be
something good left.
209
00:20:56,179 --> 00:20:58,139
What's the matter, Kath?
210
00:21:01,977 --> 00:21:03,519
Well, anyway,
it doesn't matter
211
00:21:03,603 --> 00:21:06,147
if you can't find
anything in the sale
212
00:21:06,231 --> 00:21:09,859
because I already
found you something.
213
00:21:12,571 --> 00:21:14,030
A music tape.
214
00:21:14,114 --> 00:21:17,742
I don't know much about it,
if it's much good or anything.
215
00:21:21,955 --> 00:21:23,414
Thank you.
216
00:21:29,171 --> 00:21:31,172
* Darling *
217
00:21:34,009 --> 00:21:44,852
* Hold me *
218
00:21:44,936 --> 00:21:46,520
* And never *
219
00:21:47,564 --> 00:21:51,358
* Never *
220
00:21:52,027 --> 00:21:55,654
* Let me go *
221
00:22:04,998 --> 00:22:07,249
* Darling *
222
00:22:09,377 --> 00:22:20,638
* Kiss me *
223
00:22:20,722 --> 00:22:22,598
* And never *
224
00:22:23,100 --> 00:22:27,228
* Never *
225
00:22:27,687 --> 00:22:32,399
* Let me go *
226
00:23:03,515 --> 00:23:05,349
The problem is
227
00:23:06,476 --> 00:23:09,728
you've been told
and not told.
228
00:23:10,564 --> 00:23:13,065
That's what I've seen
while I've been here.
229
00:23:14,401 --> 00:23:16,318
You've been told
230
00:23:16,611 --> 00:23:19,238
but none of you
really understand.
231
00:23:20,240 --> 00:23:24,368
So I've decided
I'll talk to you in a way
that you will understand.
232
00:23:28,039 --> 00:23:30,332
Do you know
what happens to children
when they grow up?
233
00:23:33,086 --> 00:23:36,797
No, you don't,
because nobody knows.
234
00:23:39,134 --> 00:23:41,677
They might grow up
to become actors,
235
00:23:42,679 --> 00:23:44,638
move to America.
236
00:23:46,391 --> 00:23:48,893
Or they might work
in supermarkets.
237
00:23:49,561 --> 00:23:51,312
Or teach in schools.
238
00:23:52,397 --> 00:23:57,234
They might become
sportsmen or bus conductors
or racing car drivers.
239
00:23:57,485 --> 00:23:59,904
They might do
almost anything.
240
00:24:02,240 --> 00:24:04,200
But with you
we do know.
241
00:24:07,329 --> 00:24:09,622
None of you
will go to America.
242
00:24:11,416 --> 00:24:14,376
None of you will work
in supermarkets.
243
00:24:16,630 --> 00:24:18,923
None of you
will do anything
except live the life
244
00:24:19,007 --> 00:24:21,217
that has already
been set out for you.
245
00:24:23,845 --> 00:24:25,930
You will
become adults,
246
00:24:27,682 --> 00:24:29,350
but only briefly.
247
00:24:32,812 --> 00:24:34,521
Before you are old,
248
00:24:36,107 --> 00:24:38,442
before you are
even middle-aged,
249
00:24:38,860 --> 00:24:42,196
you will start to donate
your vital organs.
250
00:24:44,699 --> 00:24:47,201
That's what you were
created to do.
251
00:24:49,704 --> 00:24:54,208
And sometime
around your third
or fourth donation,
252
00:24:55,293 --> 00:24:58,045
your short life
will be complete.
253
00:24:59,798 --> 00:25:04,134
You have to know
who you are
and what you are.
254
00:25:05,095 --> 00:25:08,264
It's the only way
you'll lead
decent lives.
255
00:25:59,524 --> 00:26:02,693
There will be only one
announcement this morning,
256
00:26:03,945 --> 00:26:05,487
which is that Miss Lucy,
257
00:26:05,572 --> 00:26:07,990
who was guardian
to the fourth-year students,
258
00:26:08,366 --> 00:26:10,743
is no longer
working at Hailsham.
259
00:26:14,664 --> 00:26:17,541
A replacement
will be found for her,
and in the meantime
260
00:26:17,625 --> 00:26:21,628
her classes
will be divided between
Miss Geraldine and myself.
261
00:26:23,757 --> 00:26:26,300
It is hard, is it not,
262
00:26:26,843 --> 00:26:30,846
to continue in the face
of deliberate subversion.
263
00:26:32,640 --> 00:26:36,643
There are those who seek
to thwart us, this is clear.
264
00:26:37,062 --> 00:26:40,731
And we are aware that the tide
is not with forward thinking.
265
00:26:40,815 --> 00:26:42,149
It never is.
266
00:26:43,318 --> 00:26:47,071
No, the tide is with
the entrenched mindset.
267
00:26:47,155 --> 00:26:49,782
With values that
are still unexamined.
268
00:26:52,535 --> 00:26:54,912
But I will not be coerced.
269
00:26:59,834 --> 00:27:02,002
I will not be coerced.
270
00:27:04,964 --> 00:27:07,341
And neither will Hailsham.
271
00:28:11,865 --> 00:28:16,410
I didn't understand why,
after all her teasing,
272
00:28:17,412 --> 00:28:21,623
Ruth would decide
that Tommy was the boy
she liked most of all.
273
00:28:30,508 --> 00:28:33,886
They say girls are always mean
to the boys they like.
274
00:28:37,599 --> 00:28:40,267
So maybe Ruth
had liked him all along.
275
00:28:45,273 --> 00:28:48,150
Maybe I should have
teased him, too.
276
00:29:02,373 --> 00:29:04,791
I kept hoping
they would separate,
277
00:29:05,001 --> 00:29:08,754
like the other childhood
and teenage romances
at the school.
278
00:29:14,719 --> 00:29:16,261
They never did.
279
00:29:50,672 --> 00:29:53,423
We were moved
from Hailsham at 18
280
00:29:53,508 --> 00:29:55,926
and sent to various
accommodations
around the country,
281
00:29:56,010 --> 00:29:59,263
to wait
until we were old enough
to start the donations.
282
00:30:02,100 --> 00:30:03,892
Tommy, Ruth and I
283
00:30:03,977 --> 00:30:07,938
were sent to a collection
of farm buildings
called The Cottages.
284
00:30:13,778 --> 00:30:15,445
During our stay there,
we were told
285
00:30:15,530 --> 00:30:19,157
that some of us
would be permitted
to volunteer as carers.
286
00:30:21,411 --> 00:30:25,539
But, apart from that,
we'd be left largely
to our own devices
287
00:30:25,623 --> 00:30:29,835
and even allowed
to take day trips into
the surrounding countryside.
288
00:30:34,882 --> 00:30:36,800
The Cottages were also
our first contact
289
00:30:36,884 --> 00:30:39,803
with those who had not
grown up at Hailsham.
290
00:30:40,054 --> 00:30:42,055
There were people
from White Mansion,
291
00:30:42,557 --> 00:30:47,102
Oakhill, Morningdale
and other homes
I'd never heard of.
292
00:30:50,023 --> 00:30:53,734
Everyone seemed wiser
and more worldly than us.
293
00:30:56,279 --> 00:30:59,239
None more so than
Rodney and Chrissie.
294
00:30:59,324 --> 00:31:02,034
They'd already been
at The Cottages
for over a year
295
00:31:02,118 --> 00:31:05,329
and would soon be leaving
for the completion centers.
296
00:31:05,413 --> 00:31:08,165
Ricky?
I don't know what
you're talking about.
297
00:31:08,249 --> 00:31:10,125
Oh, I can
help you out there.
298
00:31:10,209 --> 00:31:14,129
He's talking about
blue eyes, blond hair,
cute dimples when he smiles.
299
00:31:14,213 --> 00:31:16,923
And biceps that
could crack walnuts.
300
00:31:19,510 --> 00:31:21,428
Jennifer, get real,
I saw you with him.
301
00:31:21,512 --> 00:31:25,098
Jen and Ricky
sitting in a tree,
K-I-S-S-I-N-G.
302
00:31:25,933 --> 00:31:28,477
That is so not true.
303
00:31:30,772 --> 00:31:32,272
We weren't in a tree.
304
00:31:50,041 --> 00:31:51,458
Hey.
305
00:31:55,505 --> 00:31:57,297
Where you going?
306
00:31:57,965 --> 00:32:00,092
I thought
I'd go for a walk.
307
00:32:00,468 --> 00:32:04,471
Does that mean
you want to be alone?
308
00:32:35,628 --> 00:32:37,629
I'm not even saying
that I'll apply
to be a carer.
309
00:32:37,714 --> 00:32:39,965
Just that several people
have said that
I'd be good at it.
310
00:32:40,299 --> 00:32:42,175
But then Laura went around
telling everyone
311
00:32:42,260 --> 00:32:44,761
that I'd been saying
I was the most likely
to get selected.
312
00:32:44,846 --> 00:32:45,929
That's so not true.
313
00:32:46,013 --> 00:32:47,472
So not true.
314
00:32:47,849 --> 00:32:49,433
Thank you.
315
00:32:52,395 --> 00:32:54,354
I'm getting
more plates.
316
00:32:56,023 --> 00:32:57,858
Is there
anything left for us?
317
00:32:57,984 --> 00:32:59,985
I don't know.
318
00:33:02,363 --> 00:33:03,739
Perhaps not.
319
00:33:05,199 --> 00:33:07,451
Ruth, why do you
do that thing?
320
00:33:08,202 --> 00:33:09,578
Squeezing
Tommy's shoulder.
321
00:33:11,914 --> 00:33:13,540
I'm allowed
to touch Tommy,
aren't I?
322
00:33:13,624 --> 00:33:15,876
It's the way
you're touching him.
323
00:33:15,960 --> 00:33:18,378
You know what I mean.
It's copied from
that television show.
324
00:33:19,547 --> 00:33:20,547
That's so not...
325
00:33:20,631 --> 00:33:23,175
Don't tell me
"that's so not true."
326
00:33:25,178 --> 00:33:28,138
All that behavior,
that's not what people do
out there, in real life,
327
00:33:28,222 --> 00:33:29,473
if that's what
you were thinking.
328
00:33:29,557 --> 00:33:32,642
So what? Look,
it's no big deal.
A lot of us do it.
329
00:33:32,727 --> 00:33:34,811
What you mean is
Chrissie and Rod do it.
330
00:33:35,897 --> 00:33:37,731
Oh, Kathy.
331
00:33:40,485 --> 00:33:42,694
So that's what
this is about.
332
00:33:43,654 --> 00:33:44,738
It must be really
awful for you,
333
00:33:44,822 --> 00:33:46,281
surrounded by
all these couples.
334
00:33:46,866 --> 00:33:50,660
I never said that.
I just think it's daft.
335
00:33:51,370 --> 00:33:53,955
You copy them,
and they copy from
a television show.
336
00:33:54,040 --> 00:33:56,124
I'm right,
aren't I?
337
00:33:57,084 --> 00:34:01,463
You don't like the fact
that Tommy and I are friends
with Chrissie and Rod,
338
00:34:01,547 --> 00:34:03,423
whereas you hardly
speak to anyone.
339
00:34:06,427 --> 00:34:09,429
No. You're not right.
340
00:34:10,640 --> 00:34:12,516
"So" not right?
341
00:34:31,953 --> 00:34:33,787
Thank you, Mr. Keffers.
342
00:35:40,354 --> 00:35:41,855
Hello, Tommy.
343
00:35:42,690 --> 00:35:44,441
Hello, Kath.
344
00:35:47,904 --> 00:35:52,032
Well, don't just
hover in the doorway.
Come in. Join the fun.
345
00:35:53,659 --> 00:35:56,369
Didn't know you liked
that sort of stuff.
346
00:35:57,663 --> 00:35:59,414
You're very welcome to them
after I've finished.
347
00:35:59,874 --> 00:36:02,000
Oh, no,
it's just sex stuff.
348
00:36:02,543 --> 00:36:05,378
I expect I've seen
them all already anyway.
349
00:36:10,384 --> 00:36:11,801
Kathy, what are
you looking for?
350
00:36:12,553 --> 00:36:15,889
What do you mean?
I'm just looking
at dirty pictures.
351
00:36:17,224 --> 00:36:18,308
What, just for kicks?
352
00:36:18,392 --> 00:36:20,852
I suppose you could
say that, yes.
353
00:36:26,734 --> 00:36:30,195
If it's just for kicks,
then you don't do it
like that.
354
00:36:31,405 --> 00:36:34,032
You need to look
at each picture
more carefully.
355
00:36:34,241 --> 00:36:36,576
Nothing really happens
if you go that fast.
356
00:36:36,869 --> 00:36:39,204
How do you know
what works for girls?
357
00:36:41,415 --> 00:36:43,917
Kath, you're not
looking for kicks.
358
00:36:47,880 --> 00:36:51,675
Here, give it to Ruth.
See if it does
anything for her.
359
00:37:06,440 --> 00:37:11,444
Hi.
360
00:37:13,864 --> 00:37:16,241
I suppose you've heard
what Rod and Chrissie
have been saying.
361
00:37:17,284 --> 00:37:18,785
No, I haven't.
362
00:37:23,958 --> 00:37:26,001
Well, you know that
Rod and Chrissie
363
00:37:26,085 --> 00:37:27,544
have been thinking
of applying
to be carers,
364
00:37:27,628 --> 00:37:28,628
so they've been
learning how to drive.
365
00:37:28,713 --> 00:37:29,713
Yeah.
366
00:37:29,797 --> 00:37:34,467
Well, last weekend,
they went up to a town
on the Norfolk coast,
367
00:37:35,261 --> 00:37:37,971
and they think
they saw this person.
368
00:37:38,139 --> 00:37:39,556
What kind of person?
369
00:37:40,725 --> 00:37:42,267
A lady
370
00:37:43,436 --> 00:37:44,894
working in an office.
371
00:37:45,438 --> 00:37:46,604
And...
372
00:37:48,357 --> 00:37:49,983
What is it, Ruth?
373
00:37:51,819 --> 00:37:54,738
But they thought
this person
was a Possible.
374
00:37:57,116 --> 00:37:58,867
For me.
375
00:37:59,577 --> 00:38:00,910
They found
your Original?
376
00:38:00,995 --> 00:38:03,329
They aren't sure,
obviously,
377
00:38:03,414 --> 00:38:06,416
but Rodney
said that the resemblance
was really striking.
378
00:38:06,500 --> 00:38:08,793
Oh, my God. Ruth!
I know.
379
00:38:10,046 --> 00:38:13,715
They want to drive me
back up there so that
I can see for myself.
380
00:38:13,841 --> 00:38:16,092
Tommy will come, but...
381
00:38:16,427 --> 00:38:17,844
Do you want me to come?
382
00:38:21,348 --> 00:38:23,308
Ruth, of course.
383
00:38:33,527 --> 00:38:37,614
So, exactly how much
experience have you guys
had with the outside?
384
00:38:38,491 --> 00:38:39,532
Quite a lot.
385
00:38:39,617 --> 00:38:41,034
No, we haven't.
386
00:38:42,703 --> 00:38:45,789
We did a lot of role-playing
exercises at Hailsham.
387
00:38:45,873 --> 00:38:47,540
They don't count.
388
00:38:47,917 --> 00:38:51,169
Okay. Well,
don't feel scared.
389
00:38:51,295 --> 00:38:54,297
Okay? There's really...
There's nothing to it.
390
00:38:56,092 --> 00:38:57,717
We aren't scared.
391
00:38:58,552 --> 00:39:00,011
Good.
392
00:39:23,202 --> 00:39:24,661
I'll get sausage,
egg and chips.
393
00:39:29,208 --> 00:39:30,333
Sausage,
egg and chips, please.
394
00:39:30,417 --> 00:39:31,501
Yes, sausage,
egg and chips.
395
00:39:31,585 --> 00:39:33,628
Sausage, egg and chips,
me, too, please.
396
00:39:34,797 --> 00:39:37,966
Well, I suppose
I'd better get sausage,
egg and chips, too, then.
397
00:39:38,050 --> 00:39:42,178
Five sausage,
egg and chips. Drinks?
398
00:39:44,932 --> 00:39:46,432
Five Cokes, please.
399
00:40:00,948 --> 00:40:03,241
It was good.
It was really good.
400
00:40:04,785 --> 00:40:05,994
What?
Sorry.
401
00:40:10,749 --> 00:40:15,086
You know, there's something
I've been wanting
to talk to you lot about.
402
00:40:16,422 --> 00:40:18,715
The problem is that
back there at The Cottages
it's impossible.
403
00:40:18,799 --> 00:40:21,134
Someone's always
listening in.
404
00:40:22,469 --> 00:40:23,887
So,
405
00:40:26,599 --> 00:40:28,892
someone was saying
that some Hailsham
students in the past
406
00:40:28,976 --> 00:40:31,644
have managed
to get a deferral.
407
00:40:31,812 --> 00:40:33,313
Apparently those
Hailsham students
408
00:40:33,397 --> 00:40:36,482
could have
their first donation
put back by three
409
00:40:37,193 --> 00:40:39,611
or even four years.
410
00:40:42,990 --> 00:40:44,991
As long as they qualified.
411
00:40:45,910 --> 00:40:48,119
If there was a boy
and a girl,
412
00:40:48,537 --> 00:40:50,538
and they were in love
with each other,
413
00:40:50,623 --> 00:40:54,459
really properly in love,
and they could prove it,
414
00:40:55,127 --> 00:40:58,046
then they would be given
a few years together
415
00:40:58,255 --> 00:41:00,673
before they began
their donations.
416
00:41:03,844 --> 00:41:06,095
Where did you
hear about this?
417
00:41:06,972 --> 00:41:08,348
When we were
at White Mansion.
418
00:41:08,474 --> 00:41:10,642
People there were
always going on about
this Hailsham couple.
419
00:41:11,310 --> 00:41:12,894
When the guy was
only a few weeks
from donation,
420
00:41:12,978 --> 00:41:16,481
he just went to see someone.
He applied,
and everything got sorted out.
421
00:41:17,233 --> 00:41:20,985
I suppose you lot
would know about
that sort of thing.
422
00:41:21,070 --> 00:41:24,864
Being from Hailsham,
you'd know how that
sort of thing works.
423
00:41:25,449 --> 00:41:27,867
Who is it
you go to?
424
00:41:28,869 --> 00:41:32,372
Who would we talk to
if we wanted to apply?
425
00:41:40,798 --> 00:41:42,674
To be honest,
I don't know what
you're talking about.
426
00:41:44,510 --> 00:41:46,219
Come on.
427
00:41:47,888 --> 00:41:49,222
Do you expect us
to believe that?
428
00:41:49,306 --> 00:41:52,141
Everybody knows
Hailsham is special.
429
00:41:52,726 --> 00:41:54,394
So what is it?
430
00:41:55,688 --> 00:41:58,273
Why keep these
things to yourself?
431
00:42:04,738 --> 00:42:07,407
There were lots of
stories at Hailsham.
432
00:42:08,367 --> 00:42:11,869
I don't think many of them
turned out to be true.
433
00:42:38,605 --> 00:42:40,523
It may be
down here.
434
00:42:50,617 --> 00:42:51,993
Yeah.
435
00:42:52,453 --> 00:42:53,786
That's it.
436
00:43:20,230 --> 00:43:21,981
God, it must be her.
437
00:43:22,816 --> 00:43:25,276
Yeah, that's her.
438
00:43:51,637 --> 00:43:53,262
It's not her.
439
00:43:54,890 --> 00:43:56,891
I'm not her.
No, you're not.
440
00:43:57,184 --> 00:43:58,601
It was really
close, though.
441
00:43:58,685 --> 00:44:01,270
Oh, shut up, Tommy!
It wasn't close.
It wasn't close at all.
442
00:44:01,355 --> 00:44:04,690
And I knew
it wasn't gonna be her
before we even got here!
443
00:44:05,192 --> 00:44:06,901
It was never
gonna be her.
444
00:44:07,027 --> 00:44:10,071
They never, ever model us
on people like that woman.
445
00:44:10,155 --> 00:44:11,781
Ruth, don't.
What?
446
00:44:12,408 --> 00:44:14,534
We all know it,
we just never say it.
447
00:44:15,828 --> 00:44:18,121
We are modeled on trash.
448
00:44:18,247 --> 00:44:22,208
Junkies, prostitutes,
winos, tramps.
449
00:44:22,835 --> 00:44:25,920
Convicts, maybe,
as long as they
aren't psychos.
450
00:44:27,047 --> 00:44:31,050
If you want to look
for Possibles, if you
want to do it properly,
451
00:44:33,220 --> 00:44:34,429
look in the gutter.
452
00:44:36,348 --> 00:44:38,349
That's where we came from.
453
00:45:05,919 --> 00:45:10,298
Hey.
454
00:45:41,788 --> 00:45:43,789
We should go back.
455
00:47:06,707 --> 00:47:09,333
Don't tell me
to calm down!
456
00:47:10,294 --> 00:47:12,628
You walked down the pier
and you left me there.
457
00:47:12,713 --> 00:47:14,380
You knew
I was well upset.
458
00:47:27,227 --> 00:47:28,227
Out here.
459
00:47:43,368 --> 00:47:47,830
Chrissie and Rod
are pretty obsessed about
this rumor, aren't they?
460
00:47:47,914 --> 00:47:49,874
About the deferrals?
Mmm.
461
00:47:52,044 --> 00:47:55,087
I was thinking about it
again last night,
462
00:47:55,589 --> 00:47:57,548
and if this
rumor's true
463
00:47:58,759 --> 00:48:01,010
it might explain
a few things.
464
00:48:01,386 --> 00:48:02,845
Such as?
Well,
465
00:48:04,431 --> 00:48:05,848
The Gallery,
for instance.
466
00:48:05,932 --> 00:48:09,644
We never got to
the bottom of it,
what The Gallery was for.
467
00:48:10,020 --> 00:48:12,188
Pictures, poetry
and sculpture.
468
00:48:12,272 --> 00:48:13,814
Say something
about yourself.
469
00:48:13,982 --> 00:48:16,150
That's the whole point
about art, isn't it?
470
00:48:16,234 --> 00:48:19,487
It says what's inside of you.
It reveals your soul.
471
00:48:19,946 --> 00:48:21,530
Yeah. So?
472
00:48:31,375 --> 00:48:35,461
Suppose for a second
that the rumor is true.
473
00:48:35,629 --> 00:48:38,756
That there is
a special arrangement
for Hailsham students,
474
00:48:38,840 --> 00:48:40,383
if they're in love.
475
00:48:41,385 --> 00:48:44,637
Well, there would
have to be
some kind of way
476
00:48:44,971 --> 00:48:48,974
to decide if couples
are telling the truth
477
00:48:49,393 --> 00:48:52,061
and not just lying
to put off their donations.
478
00:49:00,070 --> 00:49:02,571
That's what
The Gallery
could be for.
479
00:49:03,448 --> 00:49:05,825
In The Gallery
they have everything
about us they need to know.
480
00:49:05,909 --> 00:49:08,244
So if we say that
we're in love,
481
00:49:10,038 --> 00:49:12,373
they can look
into our souls
and they can see.
482
00:49:12,457 --> 00:49:15,167
They'll know
if it's real love
or if it's just a lie.
483
00:49:16,336 --> 00:49:18,379
That's a strange idea, Tommy.
484
00:49:19,965 --> 00:49:21,048
What?
485
00:49:23,218 --> 00:49:26,220
No, no. I don't think
that's any stranger
than any other idea.
486
00:49:26,304 --> 00:49:29,724
And didn't Miss Lucy say that
making art for The Gallery
wasn't even important?
487
00:49:29,808 --> 00:49:31,183
Yes.
488
00:49:32,978 --> 00:49:35,187
But look what
happened to her.
489
00:49:46,032 --> 00:49:48,242
Are you thinking
of applying?
490
00:49:49,035 --> 00:49:50,536
With Ruth?
491
00:49:53,915 --> 00:49:54,957
No.
492
00:49:56,251 --> 00:49:57,460
It wouldn't work.
493
00:49:59,379 --> 00:50:00,796
Why?
494
00:50:08,180 --> 00:50:09,722
Because
495
00:50:17,898 --> 00:50:19,398
you forget that
496
00:50:20,567 --> 00:50:23,152
you got lots of stuff
into The Gallery
over the years,
497
00:50:23,236 --> 00:50:26,697
and if I applied
they wouldn't have
anything to go on.
498
00:50:41,129 --> 00:50:43,297
It's all just rumors
and theories.
499
00:50:47,677 --> 00:50:49,136
Yeah, I know.
500
00:50:52,390 --> 00:50:53,891
Tommy.
501
00:51:42,649 --> 00:51:54,201
* Kiss me *
502
00:51:54,286 --> 00:51:56,745
* And never *
503
00:51:56,830 --> 00:52:01,292
* Never *
504
00:52:01,376 --> 00:52:05,170
* Let me go *
505
00:52:13,680 --> 00:52:15,848
* Lock my heart *
506
00:52:18,310 --> 00:52:21,770
* Throw away the key *
507
00:52:22,814 --> 00:52:25,649
* Feel my love *
508
00:52:44,544 --> 00:52:47,046
I know what
you think, Kathy.
509
00:52:50,300 --> 00:52:54,303
I know you think that you
and Tommy would have made
a more natural couple,
510
00:52:55,055 --> 00:52:56,555
and you believe
511
00:52:56,640 --> 00:53:00,100
that there's a chance
that Tommy and I
will split up some day.
512
00:53:01,561 --> 00:53:05,272
And when we do,
perhaps that will be
your chance with Tommy.
513
00:53:06,232 --> 00:53:08,567
Chance to do it
right this time.
514
00:53:15,951 --> 00:53:18,619
But you see,
the thing is, Kathy,
515
00:53:19,162 --> 00:53:22,581
although Tommy
really likes you
as a friend,
516
00:53:23,708 --> 00:53:26,418
he just doesn't
see you that way.
517
00:53:30,590 --> 00:53:33,676
He told me about
the porno magazines.
518
00:53:36,471 --> 00:53:38,722
We had quite
a laugh about it.
519
00:53:41,685 --> 00:53:45,479
He doesn't understand
what you were doing.
520
00:53:47,565 --> 00:53:49,233
But I did.
521
00:53:52,946 --> 00:53:53,946
Oh!
522
00:54:13,800 --> 00:54:16,844
I said
I'll just be
five minutes.
523
00:54:22,017 --> 00:54:23,809
I want to be
a carer.
524
00:54:25,854 --> 00:54:27,229
It's you who
I apply to, isn't it?
525
00:54:27,313 --> 00:54:28,647
Yeah.
526
00:54:28,773 --> 00:54:30,774
I said that
I'm applying.
527
00:54:33,153 --> 00:54:35,154
I'll bring
the forms tomorrow,
528
00:54:35,238 --> 00:54:37,322
and that'll start
the process.
529
00:54:48,668 --> 00:54:51,837
By the time
Ruth and Tommy
actually did separate,
530
00:54:51,921 --> 00:54:54,048
my carer training
had already begun.
531
00:54:56,259 --> 00:54:58,844
So I was hardly ever
at The Cottages.
532
00:55:24,120 --> 00:55:27,289
It had never occurred to me
that our lives,
533
00:55:27,791 --> 00:55:30,209
which had been
so closely interwoven,
534
00:55:33,129 --> 00:55:35,714
could unravel
with such speed.
535
00:55:50,480 --> 00:55:51,939
If I'd known,
536
00:55:52,899 --> 00:55:55,234
maybe I'd have kept
tighter hold of them
537
00:55:57,695 --> 00:56:00,906
and not let unseen tides
pull us apart.
538
00:56:46,369 --> 00:56:48,036
Once I began working
with my donors,
539
00:56:48,121 --> 00:56:51,290
I didn't have much time
to dwell on Tommy or Ruth.
540
00:56:52,292 --> 00:56:54,001
Eventually,
so many years had passed
541
00:56:54,085 --> 00:56:56,837
I came to think
I would never
see them again.
542
00:57:04,137 --> 00:57:07,681
Many carers find
themselves just going
through the motions,
543
00:57:07,807 --> 00:57:11,977
waiting for the day
that they can stop
and become donors.
544
00:57:16,357 --> 00:57:19,902
But for the most part,
being a carer
has suited me fine.
545
00:57:21,988 --> 00:57:25,240
I quite enjoy
traveling across
the country,
546
00:57:25,325 --> 00:57:28,952
shuttling from
center to center,
hospital to hospital.
547
00:57:42,592 --> 00:57:44,051
Here you are.
548
00:57:46,012 --> 00:57:47,512
Dark chocolate.
549
00:57:48,348 --> 00:57:51,683
If you knew how many
shops I had to go to
before I found those.
550
00:57:51,935 --> 00:57:55,312
I thought I wasn't
allowed to eat so soon
before the operation.
551
00:57:55,396 --> 00:57:58,565
Oh, you're not.
But I am.
552
00:57:58,650 --> 00:57:59,775
And after the operation,
553
00:57:59,859 --> 00:58:02,819
you can wolf down
the whole packet in one go.
554
00:58:17,377 --> 00:58:20,462
For me,
the real test
of being a carer
555
00:58:20,546 --> 00:58:23,674
is when a donor completes
earlier than expected.
556
00:58:24,384 --> 00:58:27,719
On the second
or even first donation.
557
00:58:28,137 --> 00:58:29,513
Can I just have
a quick word?
558
00:58:29,597 --> 00:58:30,681
Okay.
559
00:58:31,933 --> 00:58:34,309
I was wondering who'd be
working on Hannah today.
560
00:58:34,394 --> 00:58:37,729
I'd never say
I've become immune
to the completions.
561
00:58:38,690 --> 00:58:41,692
But they are something
I am able to live with.
562
00:58:46,072 --> 00:58:48,532
You're Hannah's carer,
aren't you?
563
00:58:49,450 --> 00:58:51,201
Hannah's carer?
Yes.
564
00:58:52,495 --> 00:58:56,123
I'm sorry, it's always hard,
but there were complications.
565
00:59:00,253 --> 00:59:01,712
You need me
to sign the release?
566
00:59:01,796 --> 00:59:03,005
Please.
567
00:59:05,216 --> 00:59:07,301
Are you going
to leave now?
568
00:59:07,385 --> 00:59:09,511
We can quite easily
provide you
with a bed tonight
569
00:59:09,595 --> 00:59:11,096
if you've got
a long drive.
570
00:59:11,222 --> 00:59:13,598
I can be back home
in under two hours.
571
00:59:13,683 --> 00:59:15,309
It's always better
to wake at home,
isn't it?
572
00:59:24,861 --> 00:59:26,528
Is that someone
you know?
573
00:59:26,654 --> 00:59:28,113
Yeah.
574
00:59:30,491 --> 00:59:32,409
Actually,
we grew up together.
575
00:59:32,785 --> 00:59:34,578
Oh.
How is she?
576
00:59:34,871 --> 00:59:36,747
Were you close?
577
00:59:36,873 --> 00:59:39,458
We haven't seen each other
now for almost 10 years.
578
00:59:39,542 --> 00:59:43,920
Well, Ruth isn't
as strong as we would
hope, at this stage.
579
00:59:46,132 --> 00:59:48,091
She's done
two donations.
580
00:59:48,634 --> 00:59:49,968
She has.
581
00:59:50,970 --> 00:59:52,471
You think
she'll complete
on the third?
582
00:59:53,348 --> 00:59:55,557
I think she wants
to complete.
583
00:59:56,476 --> 01:00:00,812
And, as you know,
when they want to complete,
they usually do.
584
01:01:20,017 --> 01:01:21,685
Kathy.
585
01:01:32,113 --> 01:01:35,073
I've been
keeping tabs on you
over the years.
586
01:01:35,324 --> 01:01:36,867
And Tommy, too.
587
01:01:37,201 --> 01:01:39,161
What do you
hear about Tommy?
588
01:01:39,245 --> 01:01:42,497
That he's done
his second donation, too,
589
01:01:42,582 --> 01:01:45,417
and apparently
he's doing
very well on it.
590
01:01:46,085 --> 01:01:47,252
Apparently
he's in better shape
591
01:01:47,336 --> 01:01:49,796
than some after
their first donation.
592
01:01:50,006 --> 01:01:52,757
Good old Tommy.
I'm not surprised.
593
01:01:54,886 --> 01:01:56,845
Are you surprised at me?
594
01:01:58,848 --> 01:02:01,683
I expect I look
a bit broken, Kath.
595
01:02:03,936 --> 01:02:05,604
It's okay.
596
01:02:05,897 --> 01:02:08,940
I don't think
I'd want to survive
my third donation, anyway.
597
01:02:09,609 --> 01:02:11,735
You hear things,
don't you?
598
01:02:11,944 --> 01:02:13,904
What kind of things?
599
01:02:14,447 --> 01:02:16,239
Oh, you know.
600
01:02:19,452 --> 01:02:21,620
How, maybe,
after the fourth donation,
601
01:02:21,704 --> 01:02:24,498
even if you've
technically completed,
602
01:02:24,624 --> 01:02:27,792
you're still conscious
in some sort of way.
603
01:02:28,711 --> 01:02:32,881
And then you find out
that there are more
donations, plenty of them.
604
01:02:32,965 --> 01:02:37,177
No more recovery centers.
No more carers.
605
01:02:38,930 --> 01:02:40,972
Just watching
and waiting.
606
01:02:42,725 --> 01:02:45,060
Till they switch you off.
607
01:02:50,900 --> 01:02:53,318
I don't think
I fancy that.
608
01:02:57,323 --> 01:02:59,741
Is it the end
of the day already?
609
01:03:01,118 --> 01:03:02,869
Do you know,
it's funny,
610
01:03:02,954 --> 01:03:07,249
I think I've thought
about you every day
for the last few months.
611
01:03:07,333 --> 01:03:09,334
Hoping I'd see you again.
612
01:03:11,003 --> 01:03:13,838
Do you know,
I felt sure
that I would.
613
01:03:15,341 --> 01:03:20,428
Seemed impossible
that I'd complete without
seeing you one last time.
614
01:03:22,848 --> 01:03:25,350
It's not
the last time, Ruth.
615
01:03:26,352 --> 01:03:28,228
They offered me a bed.
616
01:03:28,312 --> 01:03:30,689
I was planning on
staying the night anyway.
617
01:03:30,898 --> 01:03:32,524
Well.
618
01:03:57,466 --> 01:03:59,968
I always knew
you'd be a good carer.
619
01:04:00,428 --> 01:04:02,554
Your donors
are very lucky.
620
01:04:07,935 --> 01:04:11,021
Look, I was lying
awake last night
621
01:04:11,105 --> 01:04:14,065
and I suddenly had
an idea that we'd take
a trip together.
622
01:04:14,275 --> 01:04:16,067
Where to?
623
01:04:16,569 --> 01:04:19,446
I hadn't much thought
of where, just a trip.
624
01:04:23,826 --> 01:04:25,410
Although
625
01:04:26,996 --> 01:04:28,747
a place
did spring to mind.
626
01:04:28,831 --> 01:04:31,333
One of the boys
on the other floor
was talking about it.
627
01:04:31,417 --> 01:04:33,251
It's near the
Kingsfield Recovery Center.
628
01:04:33,753 --> 01:04:37,255
Is it the boat?
The one left
on the beach?
629
01:04:37,381 --> 01:04:38,965
You've heard
about it, too?
630
01:04:39,050 --> 01:04:41,593
I heard.
One of the carers
who worked there.
631
01:04:44,805 --> 01:04:46,556
And do you suppose,
632
01:04:47,600 --> 01:04:50,810
if we're driving
all that way,
633
01:04:51,562 --> 01:04:53,855
that we could
call in on Tommy?
634
01:04:58,069 --> 01:05:01,029
Told you I'd been
keeping tabs on you.
635
01:05:02,740 --> 01:05:04,157
Have you seen him?
636
01:05:05,409 --> 01:05:06,743
No, not since
The Cottages.
637
01:05:07,787 --> 01:05:09,412
No, neither have I.
638
01:05:15,544 --> 01:05:17,045
How will
we find him?
639
01:05:17,129 --> 01:05:19,798
His carer said
he'd be waiting outside.
640
01:05:36,649 --> 01:05:38,149
Look, there he is.
641
01:05:45,032 --> 01:05:48,243
Do you think
he's recognized us
through the glass?
642
01:05:50,496 --> 01:05:52,330
No, no, no.
643
01:05:52,415 --> 01:05:54,416
Let's not get out.
644
01:06:11,100 --> 01:06:12,267
Ruth's
in the car.
645
01:06:12,351 --> 01:06:13,518
Oh, right.
646
01:06:13,644 --> 01:06:15,019
Hey!
647
01:06:15,479 --> 01:06:16,855
Hi!
648
01:06:18,357 --> 01:06:19,691
Hi.
Hi.
649
01:06:21,152 --> 01:06:22,193
How are you?
650
01:06:22,278 --> 01:06:23,361
I'm good.
651
01:06:23,696 --> 01:06:24,904
Look at your hair.
652
01:06:24,989 --> 01:06:26,698
Oh, yeah.
My hair.
653
01:06:35,124 --> 01:06:37,459
I can't quite believe
that I have you both here.
654
01:06:40,504 --> 01:06:42,088
Does it feel to you
that we're back
at Hailsham again?
655
01:06:42,173 --> 01:06:44,466
Like no time
has passed?
656
01:06:45,092 --> 01:06:46,176
No, it doesn't.
657
01:06:46,260 --> 01:06:47,552
No, it doesn't
at all, does it?
658
01:06:47,970 --> 01:06:50,722
It really doesn't at all.
It's really weird.
659
01:06:50,848 --> 01:06:52,474
But a good weird, I think.
660
01:06:57,354 --> 01:07:00,899
I don't suppose you both heard
that Hailsham was closed?
661
01:07:03,486 --> 01:07:06,738
The only schools left now,
you hear
they're like battery farms.
662
01:07:07,782 --> 01:07:09,407
Like Morningdale.
663
01:07:09,867 --> 01:07:12,911
I'm sure that's
an exaggeration, though.
664
01:07:15,039 --> 01:07:17,248
Are you sure
we're going
the right way?
665
01:07:33,432 --> 01:07:34,933
It's locked,
it looks like.
666
01:07:35,851 --> 01:07:37,352
No one said
anything about this.
667
01:07:37,436 --> 01:07:39,187
No one said anything
about a locked gate.
668
01:07:39,271 --> 01:07:42,106
Ruth, just relax.
It's okay.
669
01:07:50,783 --> 01:07:52,617
Can walk through here.
670
01:08:20,646 --> 01:08:21,688
Wow.
671
01:08:35,160 --> 01:08:37,287
Hey, come on.
672
01:09:24,919 --> 01:09:28,046
I wonder if that's what
Hailsham looks like now.
673
01:09:30,674 --> 01:09:33,635
Do you ever hear, Kath,
about any of the students
from Hailsham?
674
01:09:33,719 --> 01:09:35,637
Sometimes, yeah.
675
01:09:37,139 --> 01:09:42,101
I heard that
Amanda completed
on her first donation.
676
01:09:42,728 --> 01:09:45,813
I think that happens
more than they ever tell us.
677
01:09:45,898 --> 01:09:46,898
Hmm.
678
01:09:46,982 --> 01:09:50,777
Yeah, there was this
guy at my care center
679
01:09:50,903 --> 01:09:55,907
who was always really
scared of completing
on his first donation.
680
01:09:57,117 --> 01:09:58,910
But it was all fine.
681
01:09:58,994 --> 01:10:01,913
And he's just
come through
his third one now,
682
01:10:02,539 --> 01:10:05,416
and he's completely
all right.
683
01:10:10,547 --> 01:10:12,674
It's funny,
I don't think...
684
01:10:13,759 --> 01:10:15,843
Well, I know
I wouldn't have been
a very good carer,
685
01:10:15,928 --> 01:10:17,971
but in a way
I actually think
I'm quite a good donor.
686
01:10:18,055 --> 01:10:20,765
That's what
we're supposed to be,
isn't it?
687
01:10:33,320 --> 01:10:34,946
I'd like you
to forgive me.
688
01:10:37,574 --> 01:10:39,367
I don't expect
you to.
689
01:10:39,952 --> 01:10:41,077
Forgive you
for what?
690
01:10:48,377 --> 01:10:50,712
For keeping you
and Tommy apart.
691
01:10:54,591 --> 01:10:57,885
Should have been
you two together,
I always knew it.
692
01:10:57,970 --> 01:11:00,221
As far back
as I can remember.
693
01:11:02,224 --> 01:11:05,643
It wasn't just
because of the rumors
about deferrals.
694
01:11:10,107 --> 01:11:12,316
It was because
I was jealous.
695
01:11:14,903 --> 01:11:19,032
You had real love
and I didn't,
696
01:11:22,828 --> 01:11:26,164
and I didn't want to be
the one that was left alone.
697
01:11:37,301 --> 01:11:38,968
It's the worst thing
I ever did.
698
01:11:43,515 --> 01:11:45,850
And now I want
to put it right.
699
01:11:46,226 --> 01:11:47,935
I don't know
how you can
do that, Ruth.
700
01:11:48,437 --> 01:11:49,854
I can
701
01:11:51,356 --> 01:11:53,024
if you two
get a deferral.
702
01:11:54,026 --> 01:11:56,194
It's too late
for that, Ruth.
703
01:11:56,695 --> 01:11:59,530
Way too late.
It's stupid to even
think about it.
704
01:11:59,740 --> 01:12:03,910
It isn't too late.
Look, you'll see,
both of you.
705
01:12:04,661 --> 01:12:09,207
I wanted to do this trip
because I had something
that I wanted to give you.
706
01:12:10,667 --> 01:12:12,543
It's Madame's address.
707
01:12:15,464 --> 01:12:19,175
That's who you apply to.
That's who you have to
go and see.
708
01:12:21,970 --> 01:12:23,763
How did you
get this?
709
01:12:25,474 --> 01:12:29,268
It wasn't easy,
but I've had years
to think about what I did.
710
01:12:29,520 --> 01:12:33,898
And years to try and work out
a way to make it right.
711
01:13:18,944 --> 01:13:22,155
I started doing
them when we were
at The Cottages.
712
01:13:22,322 --> 01:13:24,824
The day after
we went to find
Ruth's Possible.
713
01:13:24,950 --> 01:13:27,869
I realized that
if I was ever going to
apply for a deferral,
714
01:13:27,953 --> 01:13:30,204
then I'd have to
show them something.
715
01:13:31,623 --> 01:13:34,625
And I've done
hundreds of them
over the years.
716
01:13:36,170 --> 01:13:37,837
They're wonderful.
717
01:13:38,630 --> 01:13:40,131
What? Really?
718
01:13:40,382 --> 01:13:41,799
Yeah.
719
01:13:43,385 --> 01:13:45,052
Well, thank you.
720
01:13:57,191 --> 01:14:00,318
I have never
showed anyone
them until now.
721
01:14:02,779 --> 01:14:04,864
They were my secret.
722
01:14:06,575 --> 01:14:09,327
Just like you
and those
porno magazines.
723
01:14:10,078 --> 01:14:11,746
You remember that?
724
01:14:12,164 --> 01:14:13,247
Yeah.
725
01:14:15,751 --> 01:14:17,668
Ruth said
you didn't understand
what I was doing.
726
01:14:17,753 --> 01:14:19,879
No, I don't think
she understood
what you were doing.
727
01:14:20,047 --> 01:14:22,048
She thought
you were looking
at the dirty pictures
728
01:14:22,132 --> 01:14:24,675
in order
to find out about sex
729
01:14:26,762 --> 01:14:30,389
and to find out what
you were missing out
on or something.
730
01:14:33,894 --> 01:14:35,436
I knew.
731
01:14:37,105 --> 01:14:40,233
I knew you were looking
for your Original.
732
01:14:42,903 --> 01:14:46,697
I used to have
these huge urges
to have sex sometimes.
733
01:14:47,699 --> 01:14:50,243
And sometimes
they'd be so powerful,
734
01:14:50,786 --> 01:14:52,703
I just thought
I'd do it with anyone.
735
01:14:55,207 --> 01:14:58,042
So I thought that
had to tell me something.
736
01:14:58,168 --> 01:15:00,962
Something about
the kind of person
I was modeled on.
737
01:15:03,382 --> 01:15:05,049
It's stupid,
738
01:15:06,635 --> 01:15:09,720
but I guessed the magazines
would be the most likely
place I'd find her.
739
01:15:11,890 --> 01:15:13,641
You know those urges
are natural, don't you?
740
01:15:13,725 --> 01:15:17,270
You know all of us had them.
You know that now, right?
741
01:15:30,993 --> 01:15:32,743
"From Basrah we sailed,
742
01:15:34,162 --> 01:15:37,915
"day after day,
night after night,
over the sea,
743
01:15:39,042 --> 01:15:42,920
"visiting island after island
and land after land,
744
01:15:44,256 --> 01:15:47,300
"selling or bartering
our goods at each.
745
01:15:50,887 --> 01:15:55,349
"One day,
after some weeks of sailing
out of sight of land,
746
01:15:55,434 --> 01:15:58,144
"we saw an island in the sea
with such fair greenery
747
01:15:58,228 --> 01:16:01,439
"that it appeared
like one of the
gardens of Eden.
748
01:16:02,024 --> 01:16:05,443
"At once
the captain made towards
this delectable land
749
01:16:05,527 --> 01:16:09,530
"and, when the anchor
had been cast
and the ladder lowered,
750
01:16:09,614 --> 01:16:12,450
"allowed his passengers
to disembark."
751
01:16:19,082 --> 01:16:20,791
Don't stop.
752
01:18:46,646 --> 01:18:51,525
Ruth got it right.
Right street,
right door, everything.
753
01:18:56,031 --> 01:18:59,575
We have to decide
which of my drawings
we're gonna take.
754
01:19:02,996 --> 01:19:05,623
Just take the best ones.
Maybe six or seven of them.
755
01:19:05,707 --> 01:19:07,708
You have to help me.
Yeah, I know.
756
01:19:14,049 --> 01:19:16,884
So, we'll just go there.
757
01:19:16,968 --> 01:19:18,010
Mmm.
758
01:19:18,094 --> 01:19:19,762
Next week.
759
01:19:19,846 --> 01:19:22,389
I'll take you out
for lab tests, I'll sign
you out for the whole day
760
01:19:22,474 --> 01:19:24,183
and we'll visit Madame
on the way back.
761
01:19:40,867 --> 01:19:42,993
We're going to do it.
762
01:19:45,288 --> 01:19:47,331
I thought you should know.
763
01:19:50,335 --> 01:19:52,211
You're going to apply?
764
01:19:54,965 --> 01:19:56,340
Yes.
765
01:20:02,097 --> 01:20:03,514
Good.
766
01:22:06,638 --> 01:22:08,514
Madame?
767
01:22:13,812 --> 01:22:15,229
Sorry.
768
01:22:16,106 --> 01:22:18,315
We didn't mean
to startle you.
769
01:22:18,983 --> 01:22:20,734
We were at Hailsham.
770
01:22:25,490 --> 01:22:27,825
I'm Kathy.
This is Tommy.
771
01:22:30,328 --> 01:22:32,663
We're not here to
give you any trouble.
772
01:22:36,126 --> 01:22:37,584
From Hailsham?
773
01:22:37,669 --> 01:22:39,211
We just came
to talk to you.
774
01:22:41,089 --> 01:22:43,340
And I brought you
some things.
775
01:22:44,342 --> 01:22:47,219
Some things
you might like
for your Gallery.
776
01:22:49,389 --> 01:22:50,973
Come inside.
777
01:23:26,468 --> 01:23:28,469
Please, wait here.
778
01:23:46,571 --> 01:23:48,363
Look, it's Hailsham.
779
01:23:50,074 --> 01:23:52,242
Kathy, it's Hailsham.
780
01:23:54,204 --> 01:23:56,914
That's exactly
how I remember it.
781
01:24:04,005 --> 01:24:05,631
Please, sit down.
782
01:24:20,939 --> 01:24:22,314
So...
783
01:24:25,527 --> 01:24:27,027
We're in love.
784
01:24:27,821 --> 01:24:30,364
And it's true love.
It's verifiable.
785
01:24:31,449 --> 01:24:33,450
Verifiable. I see.
786
01:24:39,499 --> 01:24:40,999
Go on.
787
01:24:41,251 --> 01:24:42,668
Well,
788
01:24:44,337 --> 01:24:46,964
we'd heard about
the deferrals.
789
01:24:49,175 --> 01:24:51,927
And we'd worked out
the purpose
of The Gallery.
790
01:24:53,304 --> 01:24:55,055
Tell me the purpose.
791
01:24:56,850 --> 01:24:59,935
To use our art
from Hailsham
792
01:25:00,144 --> 01:25:02,479
to look into
our souls,
793
01:25:03,523 --> 01:25:06,942
which would verify
that we deserved
a deferral.
794
01:25:07,652 --> 01:25:11,029
But the problem is
795
01:25:11,114 --> 01:25:13,991
I was a little bit
mixed up back then
796
01:25:14,075 --> 01:25:18,287
and I didn't
really do any art,
797
01:25:19,956 --> 01:25:22,291
so you never took
anything of mine.
798
01:25:22,375 --> 01:25:25,836
I know, I know that
that is my fault
799
01:25:25,920 --> 01:25:29,131
and it is probably
much too late,
800
01:25:29,215 --> 01:25:31,216
but I brought
some stuff
with me today.
801
01:25:37,181 --> 01:25:40,267
This is a book
of stuff and...
802
01:25:52,363 --> 01:25:54,406
Other stuff here.
803
01:25:59,203 --> 01:26:02,331
Some of them I've done
quite recently,
804
01:26:03,374 --> 01:26:04,708
and others
805
01:26:06,669 --> 01:26:09,546
were done
several years ago,
so there's a real spread.
806
01:26:10,840 --> 01:26:14,134
You already have
a load of stuff
from Kath already.
807
01:26:14,218 --> 01:26:17,262
She got loads of stuff
into The Gallery over
the years, didn't...
808
01:26:17,388 --> 01:26:19,056
I'm sorry.
809
01:26:22,393 --> 01:26:24,353
I never know
what to do.
810
01:26:31,194 --> 01:26:33,070
I'll take it
from here.
811
01:26:38,952 --> 01:26:40,619
Thank you, George.
812
01:26:45,083 --> 01:26:47,501
Kathy H and Tommy D.
813
01:26:49,253 --> 01:26:51,213
I remember you both.
814
01:26:51,756 --> 01:26:54,883
Kathy, a bright girl,
and so creative.
815
01:26:55,176 --> 01:26:58,470
And Tommy, a big heart
and terrible rages.
816
01:27:02,725 --> 01:27:04,434
You have to understand,
817
01:27:05,436 --> 01:27:10,023
Hailsham was
the last place to consider
the ethics of donation.
818
01:27:10,441 --> 01:27:13,819
We used your art to show
what you were capable of.
819
01:27:14,487 --> 01:27:17,155
To show that donor children
are all but human.
820
01:27:18,992 --> 01:27:22,953
But we were providing
an answer to a question
no one was asking.
821
01:27:24,539 --> 01:27:26,748
If you ask people
to return to darkness,
822
01:27:26,833 --> 01:27:31,336
the days of lung cancer,
breast cancer,
motor neurone disease,
823
01:27:32,296 --> 01:27:34,172
they'll simply say no.
824
01:27:37,552 --> 01:27:40,846
We used to get
two or three couples
like you a year.
825
01:27:42,473 --> 01:27:44,391
Not so much these days.
826
01:27:45,893 --> 01:27:48,395
You're the first
for quite a while.
827
01:27:52,525 --> 01:27:54,818
To apply
for a deferral?
828
01:28:03,244 --> 01:28:05,662
There are
no deferrals, Tommy.
829
01:28:10,668 --> 01:28:14,880
There are no deferrals.
And there never have been.
830
01:28:25,349 --> 01:28:29,102
We didn't have
The Gallery in order
to look into your souls.
831
01:28:29,520 --> 01:28:32,731
We had The Gallery
to see if you had
souls at all.
832
01:28:45,787 --> 01:28:47,454
Do you understand?
833
01:28:58,341 --> 01:28:59,716
Yes.
834
01:29:06,557 --> 01:29:09,392
Your drawings
are very good.
835
01:29:10,728 --> 01:29:13,230
If you want,
I'll keep them.
836
01:30:15,668 --> 01:30:17,794
Thank you
for talking to us.
837
01:30:21,632 --> 01:30:23,383
You poor creatures.
838
01:30:25,178 --> 01:30:27,137
I wish I could help you.
839
01:31:27,073 --> 01:31:29,699
Sorry, can we stop
for a second?
I need to get out.
840
01:34:37,513 --> 01:34:40,098
It's been two weeks
since I lost him.
841
01:35:10,713 --> 01:35:12,922
I've been given my notice now.
842
01:35:16,760 --> 01:35:19,429
My first donation
is in a month's time.
843
01:35:28,105 --> 01:35:31,357
I come here and imagine
that this is the spot
844
01:35:31,442 --> 01:35:35,361
where
everything I've lost since
my childhood has washed up.
845
01:35:39,325 --> 01:35:42,660
I tell myself
if that were true,
846
01:35:43,496 --> 01:35:45,830
and I waited long enough,
847
01:35:46,916 --> 01:35:50,793
then a tiny figure
would appear on the horizon
across the field
848
01:35:50,961 --> 01:35:54,923
and gradually get larger
until I'd see it was Tommy.
849
01:35:57,968 --> 01:35:59,552
He'd wave
850
01:36:00,012 --> 01:36:01,888
and maybe call.
851
01:36:04,225 --> 01:36:07,268
I don't let the fantasy
go beyond that.
852
01:36:07,478 --> 01:36:08,811
I can't let it.
853
01:36:10,940 --> 01:36:14,943
I remind myself
I was lucky to have had
any time with him at all.
854
01:36:19,490 --> 01:36:21,741
What I'm not sure about
855
01:36:22,243 --> 01:36:26,829
is if our lives have been
so different from the lives
of the people we save.
856
01:36:29,792 --> 01:36:31,709
We all complete.
857
01:36:34,171 --> 01:36:37,882
Maybe none of us
really understand
what we've lived through
858
01:36:39,843 --> 01:36:42,387
or feel we've had
enough time.
859
01:43:05,437 --> 01:43:10,858
When we are scattered
afar and asunder
860
01:43:11,193 --> 01:43:16,405
Parted are those
who are singing today
861
01:43:16,990 --> 01:43:22,620
When we look back
and forgetfully wonder
862
01:43:23,121 --> 01:43:28,584
What we were like
in our learning and play
863
01:43:29,002 --> 01:43:34,507
Oh, the great days
will bring distance enchanted
864
01:43:34,758 --> 01:43:39,845
Days of fresh air
in the rain and the sun
865
01:43:40,389 --> 01:43:45,726
How we rejoiced
as we struggled and panted
866
01:43:46,186 --> 01:43:53,150
Echoes of dreamland,
Hailsham lives on
60504
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