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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,281 --> 00:00:03,303 Previously on Young Sheldon... Why do you look like you're gonna cry? 2 00:00:03,328 --> 00:00:06,331 A year ago, I was a TV weather girl in San Antonio, 3 00:00:06,331 --> 00:00:08,750 and now I'm living in a garage with the 17-year-old 4 00:00:08,750 --> 00:00:09,918 who got me pregnant. 5 00:00:09,918 --> 00:00:11,753 I'll be 18 before you know it. 6 00:00:11,753 --> 00:00:13,421 But not before you're a father! 7 00:00:13,421 --> 00:00:15,465 It's gonna be okay. 8 00:00:16,674 --> 00:00:18,176 Is it? 9 00:00:18,176 --> 00:00:20,762 I peed in the sink last night. 10 00:00:21,763 --> 00:00:23,932 Trust me. I'll fix this. 11 00:00:23,932 --> 00:00:25,517 Make yourself at home. 12 00:00:25,517 --> 00:00:27,769 Oh. Thank you so much. 13 00:00:27,769 --> 00:00:29,354 It's only temporary. I promise. 14 00:00:29,354 --> 00:00:30,980 Oh. No problem. 15 00:00:30,980 --> 00:00:32,357 Stay as long as you need. 16 00:00:32,357 --> 00:00:33,858 Bathroom's right down the hall. 17 00:00:33,858 --> 00:00:35,485 Oh, boy, a bathroom. 18 00:00:38,363 --> 00:00:39,364 Here you go-- 19 00:00:39,364 --> 00:00:41,783 scrambled eggs, bacon, 20 00:00:41,783 --> 00:00:45,787 biscuits and fresh-squeezed orange juice. 21 00:00:45,787 --> 00:00:47,664 Thank you. Looks amazing. 22 00:00:47,664 --> 00:00:48,790 Where's mine? 23 00:00:48,790 --> 00:00:50,208 You're not pregnant. She is. 24 00:00:50,208 --> 00:00:52,335 Well, I like to think we're pregnant. 25 00:00:53,294 --> 00:00:54,587 Really? 26 00:00:54,587 --> 00:00:56,047 Are your ankles swollen? 27 00:00:56,047 --> 00:00:57,507 Did you throw up this morning? 28 00:00:57,507 --> 00:00:58,800 Are you constipated? 29 00:00:58,800 --> 00:00:59,968 No, dear. 30 00:00:59,968 --> 00:01:01,177 Stop calling me "dear." 31 00:01:01,177 --> 00:01:02,303 I'm not your dear. 32 00:01:02,303 --> 00:01:03,137 You want breakfast, 33 00:01:03,137 --> 00:01:04,389 eggs are here, 34 00:01:04,389 --> 00:01:05,390 stove is there. 35 00:01:05,390 --> 00:01:06,516 Knock yourself out. 36 00:01:06,516 --> 00:01:07,642 I get she's pregnant. 37 00:01:07,642 --> 00:01:09,060 I don't know why you're so moody. 38 00:01:09,060 --> 00:01:10,728 On the count of three... 39 00:01:10,728 --> 00:01:12,897 I'm leaving, I'm leaving. 40 00:01:12,897 --> 00:01:14,315 Have a good day, Mama. 41 00:01:14,315 --> 00:01:16,484 Ugh. "Mama." 42 00:01:16,484 --> 00:01:19,404 ♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪ 43 00:01:19,404 --> 00:01:22,031 ♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪ 44 00:01:22,031 --> 00:01:24,492 ♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪ 45 00:01:24,492 --> 00:01:27,412 ♪ I am a mighty little man ♪ 46 00:01:27,412 --> 00:01:31,416 ♪ I am a mighty little man. ♪ 47 00:01:34,502 --> 00:01:36,087 Since losing his job, 48 00:01:36,087 --> 00:01:38,298 one of the few upsides for my dad 49 00:01:38,298 --> 00:01:41,634 was having the house to himself to enjoy some peace and quiet. 50 00:01:41,634 --> 00:01:43,052 Billy! 51 00:01:43,052 --> 00:01:45,597 Stop feeding the chickens Cap'n Crunch! 52 00:01:45,597 --> 00:01:47,348 But they like it. We've been over this. 53 00:01:47,348 --> 00:01:50,184 You don't eat their food, they don't eat yours. 54 00:01:50,184 --> 00:01:52,270 Everything okay over there? 55 00:01:53,354 --> 00:01:54,230 Yeah. 56 00:01:54,230 --> 00:01:56,107 Doesn't sound okay. 57 00:01:56,107 --> 00:01:58,192 Oh. You don't want to know. 58 00:01:58,192 --> 00:01:59,527 Tell me. 59 00:02:02,030 --> 00:02:03,698 He's failing math, 60 00:02:03,698 --> 00:02:05,033 and they might hold him back. 61 00:02:05,033 --> 00:02:06,951 That's rough. 62 00:02:06,951 --> 00:02:09,704 I try helping him, but math was never my strong suit. 63 00:02:09,704 --> 00:02:11,247 Yeah, I hear ya. 64 00:02:11,247 --> 00:02:12,540 And when you do try to help 'em, they realize 65 00:02:12,540 --> 00:02:13,708 how dumb you are. 66 00:02:13,708 --> 00:02:15,668 You think... 67 00:02:15,668 --> 00:02:17,420 Sheldon would help Billy? 68 00:02:17,420 --> 00:02:20,798 I'm not sure helping others is where he shines. 69 00:02:20,798 --> 00:02:23,051 Pissing 'em off-- he's got that down cold. 70 00:02:24,052 --> 00:02:26,220 Well, then I'm screwed. 71 00:02:26,220 --> 00:02:27,639 I can't afford a tutor. 72 00:02:29,057 --> 00:02:30,475 Let me talk to Sheldon, 73 00:02:30,475 --> 00:02:31,559 see what I can do. 74 00:02:31,559 --> 00:02:33,561 Appreciate it. 75 00:02:33,561 --> 00:02:34,646 Mom, look! 76 00:02:35,980 --> 00:02:38,816 That chicken is not a hat! 77 00:02:38,816 --> 00:02:40,485 Hurry. 78 00:02:43,988 --> 00:02:44,906 Hey. How was school? 79 00:02:44,906 --> 00:02:46,157 Sucked. 80 00:02:46,157 --> 00:02:47,325 Language. 81 00:02:47,325 --> 00:02:48,618 You asked, and it did. 82 00:02:48,618 --> 00:02:49,744 What happened? 83 00:02:49,744 --> 00:02:51,245 I don't want to talk about it. 84 00:02:51,245 --> 00:02:52,288 Are you sure? 85 00:02:52,288 --> 00:02:54,207 I'm a pretty good listener. 86 00:02:54,207 --> 00:02:56,459 Then why didn't you hear me say I don't want to talk about it? 87 00:02:56,459 --> 00:02:59,087 Is this about a boy? Mom. 88 00:02:59,087 --> 00:03:01,923 I-I do have some experience on the subject. 89 00:03:01,923 --> 00:03:03,716 Please, the only two boys you have experience with 90 00:03:03,716 --> 00:03:05,510 are Dad and Jesus. 91 00:03:05,510 --> 00:03:06,969 I'm gonna go talk to Meemaw. 92 00:03:08,429 --> 00:03:10,807 I know other boys. 93 00:03:10,807 --> 00:03:13,309 And then he walked right on by me like I wasn't there. 94 00:03:13,309 --> 00:03:15,269 Does he even know you like him? 95 00:03:15,269 --> 00:03:17,772 I don't know. I've ignored him, been mean to him. 96 00:03:17,772 --> 00:03:19,357 What else can I do? 97 00:03:19,357 --> 00:03:21,984 Sounds like you've tried everything. 98 00:03:21,984 --> 00:03:23,778 Okay. 99 00:03:23,778 --> 00:03:25,446 I've got an idea. 100 00:03:25,446 --> 00:03:26,948 Why don't you just tell him? 101 00:03:26,948 --> 00:03:28,533 But what if he doesn't like me back? 102 00:03:28,533 --> 00:03:29,617 I would die. 103 00:03:29,617 --> 00:03:31,119 You will not die. 104 00:03:31,119 --> 00:03:32,912 Oh, yes, I will. I will be dead, 105 00:03:32,912 --> 00:03:34,163 and you will be sad at my funeral. 106 00:03:34,163 --> 00:03:35,790 How about this-- 107 00:03:35,790 --> 00:03:37,458 why don't you get one of your girlfriends 108 00:03:37,458 --> 00:03:39,335 to find out how he feels about you. 109 00:03:39,335 --> 00:03:42,547 Why? Because then you don't have to put yourself on the spot. 110 00:03:42,547 --> 00:03:45,133 Okay. And if he doesn't like me back, 111 00:03:45,133 --> 00:03:46,718 I'll just keep being mean to him until he does. 112 00:03:47,760 --> 00:03:48,928 I don't know why that works. 113 00:03:48,928 --> 00:03:50,388 Men are dumb. 114 00:03:50,388 --> 00:03:52,140 Does that mean we're dumb for liking 'em? 115 00:03:53,182 --> 00:03:56,144 It's not a good look for us. 116 00:04:00,356 --> 00:04:01,649 You busy? 117 00:04:01,649 --> 00:04:03,234 Yes, but I'm also excellent 118 00:04:03,234 --> 00:04:05,820 at bifurcating my cognitive abilities. Hit me. 119 00:04:07,155 --> 00:04:09,407 Billy is struggling with math, and, mm, 120 00:04:09,407 --> 00:04:11,325 his mom was hoping that you could tutor him. 121 00:04:11,325 --> 00:04:12,243 I could. 122 00:04:12,243 --> 00:04:13,244 Great. 123 00:04:13,244 --> 00:04:13,995 But I won't. 124 00:04:13,995 --> 00:04:15,538 Why not? 125 00:04:15,538 --> 00:04:17,498 Because me teaching Billy is like trying to use 126 00:04:17,498 --> 00:04:18,916 the gravitational power of a neutron star 127 00:04:18,916 --> 00:04:20,668 to change the spin of a boson. 128 00:04:20,668 --> 00:04:22,503 Don't do that. 129 00:04:22,503 --> 00:04:24,213 If he doesn't pass math, 130 00:04:24,213 --> 00:04:25,590 they're gonna hold him back. 131 00:04:25,590 --> 00:04:26,799 That's the system working. 132 00:04:26,799 --> 00:04:28,009 Very Darwinian. 133 00:04:29,010 --> 00:04:30,678 Yeah. Never mind. 134 00:04:30,678 --> 00:04:32,513 Yeah, I told Brenda teaching wasn't really your thing. 135 00:04:33,681 --> 00:04:34,849 Well, it's not that I can't do it. 136 00:04:34,849 --> 00:04:35,975 Don't worry about it. 137 00:04:35,975 --> 00:04:37,310 You're good at a lot of things. 138 00:04:37,310 --> 00:04:38,895 Teaching just ain't one of 'em. 139 00:04:38,895 --> 00:04:41,355 I know what you're doing. It's reverse psychology. 140 00:04:41,355 --> 00:04:42,607 I don't know what you're talking about. 141 00:04:42,607 --> 00:04:45,109 It's childish and obvious. 142 00:04:45,109 --> 00:04:46,903 So you'll do it? Yes, I'll do it. 143 00:04:48,029 --> 00:04:49,864 Thanks for the pie. 144 00:04:49,864 --> 00:04:52,408 Mandy keeps bringing all these leftovers from the diner. 145 00:04:52,408 --> 00:04:55,369 Well, she's lucky to have you. 146 00:04:55,369 --> 00:04:56,579 Mm-hmm. 147 00:04:56,579 --> 00:04:58,080 And Missy, too. 148 00:04:59,040 --> 00:05:00,875 Lucky, lucky. 149 00:05:00,875 --> 00:05:03,294 Oh, it's killing you, isn't it? 150 00:05:03,294 --> 00:05:04,712 What? No. 151 00:05:04,712 --> 00:05:05,755 I... 152 00:05:05,755 --> 00:05:07,215 I am happy 153 00:05:07,215 --> 00:05:10,718 that she has an adult she can confide in 154 00:05:10,718 --> 00:05:12,804 about... 155 00:05:14,514 --> 00:05:16,641 Come on. Just tell me. 156 00:05:16,641 --> 00:05:18,643 I would. 157 00:05:18,643 --> 00:05:22,313 But the bond between a girl and her grandmother is... 158 00:05:22,313 --> 00:05:23,773 sacred. 159 00:05:23,773 --> 00:05:26,275 I am her mother and I am your daughter. 160 00:05:26,275 --> 00:05:27,652 Give me something. 161 00:05:29,070 --> 00:05:30,905 It's just boy stuff, okay? 162 00:05:32,198 --> 00:05:34,075 That she'd rather talk to you about. 163 00:05:34,075 --> 00:05:35,243 That's right. 164 00:05:38,246 --> 00:05:39,288 There you go. 165 00:05:40,248 --> 00:05:42,416 Eat those feelings. 166 00:05:42,416 --> 00:05:44,252 All right, I'm given to understand you have 167 00:05:44,252 --> 00:05:46,587 a test coming up on negative numbers and fractions. 168 00:05:46,587 --> 00:05:47,964 Yeah. 169 00:05:47,964 --> 00:05:50,132 So, what part don't you understand? 170 00:05:53,010 --> 00:05:54,428 Oh, boy. 171 00:05:54,428 --> 00:05:55,888 Let's take it back a step. 172 00:05:55,888 --> 00:05:57,306 Where do you stand on addition, subtraction, 173 00:05:57,306 --> 00:05:58,975 multiplication and division? 174 00:05:58,975 --> 00:06:00,935 I'm against it. 175 00:06:02,395 --> 00:06:03,646 Oh, boy. 176 00:06:04,689 --> 00:06:05,898 Hope you like tuna salad. 177 00:06:05,898 --> 00:06:07,233 I brought you a whole tub. 178 00:06:07,233 --> 00:06:08,776 How old is it? 179 00:06:08,776 --> 00:06:10,611 I don't know, but the clock's ticking. 180 00:06:10,611 --> 00:06:12,446 Meemaw? 181 00:06:12,446 --> 00:06:13,739 Uh-oh. 182 00:06:13,739 --> 00:06:14,782 We need to talk. 183 00:06:14,782 --> 00:06:17,368 Hi. What's going on? 184 00:06:17,368 --> 00:06:19,245 I told Heather that I liked Kevin 185 00:06:19,245 --> 00:06:21,289 so she could find out if he liked me back. 186 00:06:21,289 --> 00:06:22,832 Then she asked him out. 187 00:06:22,832 --> 00:06:24,166 What? She didn't even think 188 00:06:24,166 --> 00:06:25,960 he was cute until I said I liked him. 189 00:06:25,960 --> 00:06:27,169 Well, why'd you tell her? 190 00:06:27,169 --> 00:06:28,337 She told me to. 191 00:06:28,337 --> 00:06:29,630 'Cause that's how you find out 192 00:06:29,630 --> 00:06:31,132 if somebody likes you in school. 193 00:06:31,132 --> 00:06:33,843 That's o-one way. 194 00:06:33,843 --> 00:06:35,344 Why? What would you have done? 195 00:06:35,344 --> 00:06:38,306 Uh, well, you put him on Heather's radar 196 00:06:38,306 --> 00:06:39,599 when you said you liked him. 197 00:06:39,599 --> 00:06:41,183 I probably would have dropped a note 198 00:06:41,183 --> 00:06:43,185 in his locker or asked one of his guy friends. 199 00:06:43,185 --> 00:06:44,687 That makes so much more sense. 200 00:06:45,563 --> 00:06:46,689 Why didn't you tell me that? 201 00:06:46,689 --> 00:06:47,899 I gave you good advice. 202 00:06:47,899 --> 00:06:49,984 It's not my fault Heather sucks. 203 00:06:49,984 --> 00:06:51,819 So what do I do now? 204 00:06:51,819 --> 00:06:53,029 Well, the first thing... 205 00:06:53,029 --> 00:06:53,988 I was talking to her. 206 00:07:00,636 --> 00:07:02,744 Okay, your basic arithmetic skills 207 00:07:02,769 --> 00:07:04,437 are disappointing but functional. 208 00:07:04,437 --> 00:07:05,146 Thank you. 209 00:07:05,990 --> 00:07:07,533 All right, let's talk about negative numbers. 210 00:07:07,533 --> 00:07:08,826 I'm all ear. 211 00:07:08,826 --> 00:07:09,869 "Ears." 212 00:07:09,869 --> 00:07:11,328 No. "Ear." 213 00:07:11,328 --> 00:07:12,913 This one's clogged. 214 00:07:12,913 --> 00:07:14,915 Right. Okay. 215 00:07:14,915 --> 00:07:17,543 Negative numbers are numbers that are less than zero. 216 00:07:17,543 --> 00:07:19,545 But zero's nothing. Yes. 217 00:07:19,545 --> 00:07:21,547 So how can you have less than nothing? 218 00:07:21,547 --> 00:07:22,715 Let's see. 219 00:07:22,715 --> 00:07:24,049 How about this? 220 00:07:24,049 --> 00:07:26,177 If you have a dollar, that's one. 221 00:07:26,177 --> 00:07:28,345 If you have no dollars, that's zero. 222 00:07:28,345 --> 00:07:30,431 But if you owe me a dollar, that's negative one. 223 00:07:30,431 --> 00:07:31,515 Does that make sense? 224 00:07:31,515 --> 00:07:32,808 I think so. 225 00:07:32,808 --> 00:07:34,185 All right, we're making progress. 226 00:07:34,185 --> 00:07:35,478 Mom! 227 00:07:35,478 --> 00:07:37,480 I owe Sheldon a dollar. 228 00:07:38,606 --> 00:07:39,899 Tomorrow, I'm gonna tell Heather 229 00:07:39,899 --> 00:07:41,358 what a bitch she is in front of everyone. 230 00:07:41,358 --> 00:07:43,277 No, no, no. Don't show your cards. 231 00:07:43,277 --> 00:07:45,738 Tomorrow, you're gonna be her best friend. Why? 232 00:07:45,738 --> 00:07:47,239 'Cause then she'll tell you things, 233 00:07:47,239 --> 00:07:48,532 and you can use those things against her. 234 00:07:48,532 --> 00:07:49,950 Oh. You're good. 235 00:07:49,950 --> 00:07:51,619 I know. 236 00:07:51,619 --> 00:07:54,413 It's nice to have someone to talk to about this stuff. 237 00:07:54,413 --> 00:07:57,708 My mom's pretty religious, and my meemaw's kind of old. 238 00:07:57,708 --> 00:07:58,793 Hey. 239 00:07:58,793 --> 00:08:00,753 I'm sitting right here. 240 00:08:02,546 --> 00:08:03,714 Evening. 241 00:08:03,714 --> 00:08:05,966 I thought you were with Missy. 242 00:08:05,966 --> 00:08:07,676 Oh. 243 00:08:07,676 --> 00:08:10,387 I thought it was a good idea if she talked to Mandy. 244 00:08:11,430 --> 00:08:14,475 They're closer in age. 245 00:08:17,269 --> 00:08:18,771 She threw you over, didn't she? 246 00:08:18,771 --> 00:08:20,731 Without hesitation. 247 00:08:20,731 --> 00:08:22,733 Stings, don't it? 248 00:08:22,733 --> 00:08:24,068 It do. 249 00:08:24,068 --> 00:08:26,320 Well, regardless, 250 00:08:26,320 --> 00:08:29,323 I'm glad Missy has someone she can talk to. 251 00:08:29,323 --> 00:08:32,243 Like a big sister. Yeah. 252 00:08:32,243 --> 00:08:34,912 Who got knocked up by a 17-year-old knucklehead. 253 00:08:34,912 --> 00:08:36,413 Why does she want to talk to her instead of us? 254 00:08:36,413 --> 00:08:38,582 Pisses me off. 255 00:08:38,582 --> 00:08:39,667 Hey. What's up? 256 00:08:39,667 --> 00:08:41,544 Nothing. Just making dinner. 257 00:08:41,544 --> 00:08:42,795 What's going on with you? 258 00:08:42,795 --> 00:08:44,547 Just trying to stay busy. 259 00:08:44,547 --> 00:08:46,799 Keep my mind off the fact that the mother of my child 260 00:08:46,799 --> 00:08:47,925 doesn't want me around. 261 00:08:47,925 --> 00:08:49,593 Oh, honey, I'm sorry. 262 00:08:49,593 --> 00:08:52,137 Hey. Maybe you could put in a good word for me. 263 00:08:52,137 --> 00:08:54,598 And what would that word be? 264 00:08:54,598 --> 00:08:56,809 Take your pick. Dependable. 265 00:08:56,809 --> 00:08:59,353 Hardworking. Trustworthy. 266 00:08:59,353 --> 00:09:00,354 Sexy. 267 00:09:00,354 --> 00:09:01,105 Georgie. 268 00:09:01,105 --> 00:09:02,273 You're right. 269 00:09:02,273 --> 00:09:04,233 Sexy's how I got into this pickle. 270 00:09:05,651 --> 00:09:08,821 And if you add negative one and positive one, 271 00:09:08,821 --> 00:09:09,989 you get? 272 00:09:09,989 --> 00:09:11,323 Zero? 273 00:09:11,323 --> 00:09:13,117 Correct. 274 00:09:13,117 --> 00:09:14,618 I think I understand. 275 00:09:14,618 --> 00:09:16,120 Good. One question-- 276 00:09:16,120 --> 00:09:18,163 how can you have zero if zero is nothing? 277 00:09:19,290 --> 00:09:20,958 It's not something that you have. 278 00:09:20,958 --> 00:09:23,002 Zero represents a state of nothingness. 279 00:09:24,461 --> 00:09:25,629 What does that mean? 280 00:09:25,629 --> 00:09:27,464 It's nothingness. 281 00:09:27,464 --> 00:09:29,008 The absence of somethingness. 282 00:09:30,342 --> 00:09:31,719 Trust me, zero is a thing. 283 00:09:31,719 --> 00:09:33,304 But you just said it's a nothing. 284 00:09:33,304 --> 00:09:35,139 I did. 285 00:09:35,139 --> 00:09:36,932 Which is it? 286 00:09:36,932 --> 00:09:38,726 A something or a nothing? 287 00:09:41,812 --> 00:09:43,147 We have a problem. 288 00:09:43,147 --> 00:09:44,064 What? 289 00:09:44,064 --> 00:09:45,733 Zero might not exist. 290 00:09:45,733 --> 00:09:49,153 Of course zero exists. 291 00:09:49,153 --> 00:09:50,863 Great. Then explain it to me. 292 00:09:50,863 --> 00:09:52,907 Easy. Zero is nothing. 293 00:09:52,907 --> 00:09:55,034 But how can nothing be a thing? 294 00:09:56,118 --> 00:09:57,453 Think of it this way-- 295 00:09:57,453 --> 00:09:59,371 picture an empty box. 296 00:09:59,371 --> 00:10:00,998 All right. 297 00:10:00,998 --> 00:10:02,207 What's in the box? 298 00:10:02,207 --> 00:10:03,626 Nothing. 299 00:10:03,626 --> 00:10:05,794 It's not nothing. Air, atoms, molecules-- 300 00:10:05,794 --> 00:10:07,838 that empty box is as full as full can be. 301 00:10:07,838 --> 00:10:10,341 Regardless, 302 00:10:10,341 --> 00:10:12,509 zero is very important. 303 00:10:12,509 --> 00:10:14,261 I'm not saying it isn't important. 304 00:10:14,261 --> 00:10:16,347 I'm just saying the little round guy ain't real. 305 00:10:16,347 --> 00:10:18,349 You're being silly. 306 00:10:18,349 --> 00:10:20,434 Zero is a number, 307 00:10:20,434 --> 00:10:22,227 like every other number. 308 00:10:22,227 --> 00:10:24,104 Oh, yeah? Can you divide with it? 309 00:10:24,104 --> 00:10:25,564 Well... 310 00:10:26,732 --> 00:10:28,233 No. 311 00:10:28,233 --> 00:10:29,944 In fact, the Greek philosopher Parmenides said, 312 00:10:29,944 --> 00:10:32,321 "Nothing cannot exist, because to speak of something 313 00:10:32,321 --> 00:10:34,907 is to speak of something that exists." 314 00:10:34,907 --> 00:10:37,242 Well, I suppose... 315 00:10:37,242 --> 00:10:39,411 you could look at it that way. 316 00:10:39,411 --> 00:10:41,038 Dr. Sturgis, 317 00:10:41,038 --> 00:10:42,247 zero isn't real. 318 00:10:45,376 --> 00:10:46,585 I feel dizzy. 319 00:10:50,089 --> 00:10:52,091 Need any help making dinner? 320 00:10:52,091 --> 00:10:53,092 You? 321 00:10:53,092 --> 00:10:54,134 Yeah. 322 00:10:54,134 --> 00:10:56,053 Since when? 323 00:10:56,053 --> 00:10:58,889 Since I thought I should learn to cook for Mandy and the baby. 324 00:10:58,889 --> 00:11:02,935 Georgie, that is the sweetest thing I've ever heard. 325 00:11:02,935 --> 00:11:04,603 Well, I'm a sweet boy. 326 00:11:04,603 --> 00:11:05,938 So what are we doing here? 327 00:11:06,939 --> 00:11:08,732 We are peeling potatoes. 328 00:11:08,732 --> 00:11:09,900 Cool. 329 00:11:09,900 --> 00:11:11,276 Why? 330 00:11:11,276 --> 00:11:13,070 'Cause we're making mashed potatoes 331 00:11:13,070 --> 00:11:14,571 and we don't want the skins in 'em. 332 00:11:14,571 --> 00:11:16,115 Uh-huh. 333 00:11:16,115 --> 00:11:17,157 Why? 334 00:11:18,158 --> 00:11:20,744 'Cause mashed potatoes are supposed to be smooth. 335 00:11:20,744 --> 00:11:21,996 Hmm. 336 00:11:21,996 --> 00:11:23,622 You know a lot about potatoes. 337 00:11:23,622 --> 00:11:25,332 Go ahead. Peel one. 338 00:11:25,332 --> 00:11:26,500 You think I'm ready? 339 00:11:26,500 --> 00:11:28,252 Only one way to find out. 340 00:11:29,920 --> 00:11:31,296 I'll see ya later. 341 00:11:31,296 --> 00:11:32,131 Where you going? 342 00:11:32,131 --> 00:11:33,132 To dinner. 343 00:11:33,132 --> 00:11:34,258 I'm cooking. 344 00:11:34,258 --> 00:11:36,135 Actually, we're cooking. 345 00:11:36,135 --> 00:11:37,678 Actually, we're bleeding. 346 00:11:37,678 --> 00:11:39,138 Mandy's taking me to dinner. 347 00:11:39,138 --> 00:11:40,431 What about homework? 348 00:11:40,431 --> 00:11:41,432 Don't have any. 349 00:11:41,432 --> 00:11:42,599 Can I go with y'all? 350 00:11:42,599 --> 00:11:44,309 I thought you were helping me cook. 351 00:11:44,309 --> 00:11:45,144 Hang on. 352 00:11:45,144 --> 00:11:46,270 Can I? 353 00:11:46,270 --> 00:11:47,688 No. It's girls' night. 354 00:11:47,688 --> 00:11:48,731 Bye. 355 00:11:51,525 --> 00:11:53,610 Might want to wash this one off. 356 00:11:53,610 --> 00:11:55,112 Oh. 357 00:11:55,112 --> 00:11:56,822 Any updates on Kevin? 358 00:11:56,822 --> 00:11:59,533 I did what you said and was nothing but nice to Heather. 359 00:11:59,533 --> 00:12:00,868 Okay. How'd that go? 360 00:12:00,868 --> 00:12:02,161 So good. 361 00:12:02,161 --> 00:12:03,787 I found out she stuffs her bra. 362 00:12:03,787 --> 00:12:05,539 Huh. See? When the time is right, 363 00:12:05,539 --> 00:12:06,999 you can destroy her with that. 364 00:12:06,999 --> 00:12:08,959 That's gonna be a good day. 365 00:12:08,959 --> 00:12:10,711 And that trick isn't just for middle school. 366 00:12:10,711 --> 00:12:12,713 That's something you can use for the rest of your life. 367 00:12:12,713 --> 00:12:14,298 You are so wise. 368 00:12:15,340 --> 00:12:17,134 Well, I have lived a little. 369 00:12:17,134 --> 00:12:18,302 And so pretty. 370 00:12:18,302 --> 00:12:19,636 You should be on TV. 371 00:12:19,636 --> 00:12:21,513 Actually, when I lived in San Antonio, 372 00:12:21,513 --> 00:12:23,057 I was a weather girl. 373 00:12:23,057 --> 00:12:25,017 Oh, my God, you were a TV star? 374 00:12:25,017 --> 00:12:26,977 Monday through Friday, 00 a.m., 375 00:12:26,977 --> 00:12:28,228 right before the farm report. 376 00:12:28,228 --> 00:12:30,064 Okay, you're, like, my new hero. 377 00:12:30,064 --> 00:12:31,857 Oh, stop. You could totally be a weather girl. 378 00:12:31,857 --> 00:12:34,860 No. They're all perfect and blonde. Like you. 379 00:12:34,860 --> 00:12:36,820 Anybody can be blonde. 380 00:12:36,820 --> 00:12:38,489 You think Madonna's really blonde? 381 00:12:38,489 --> 00:12:40,157 What? 382 00:12:40,157 --> 00:12:41,533 She's a brunette. 383 00:12:41,533 --> 00:12:43,660 What about her Blond Ambition Tour? 384 00:12:43,660 --> 00:12:46,663 Ha. More like Bottle Blond Ambition Tour. 385 00:12:46,663 --> 00:12:48,832 Funny and beautiful. 386 00:12:48,832 --> 00:12:50,834 No wonder my brother put a baby in you. 387 00:12:56,507 --> 00:12:57,508 What's wrong? 388 00:12:57,508 --> 00:12:59,176 Zero. 389 00:12:59,176 --> 00:13:01,011 Zero is wrong? 390 00:13:01,011 --> 00:13:02,888 Zero doesn't exist. 391 00:13:03,889 --> 00:13:04,932 I don't understand. 392 00:13:04,932 --> 00:13:06,517 Neither do we. 393 00:13:06,517 --> 00:13:08,936 Dr. Linkletter, there's no such thing as zero. 394 00:13:08,936 --> 00:13:11,105 That's preposterous. Of course there is. 395 00:13:11,105 --> 00:13:13,232 Prove it, tough guy. 396 00:13:17,361 --> 00:13:18,821 Uh-oh. 397 00:13:22,324 --> 00:13:23,951 May I have that? 398 00:13:29,540 --> 00:13:30,582 Over here. 399 00:13:37,214 --> 00:13:38,799 Uh-oh. 400 00:13:44,981 --> 00:13:46,217 Let me see. 401 00:13:46,233 --> 00:13:47,108 It's bad. 402 00:13:47,108 --> 00:13:48,235 Just stay calm. 403 00:13:48,235 --> 00:13:49,277 I'm sure it's fine. 404 00:13:49,277 --> 00:13:50,445 It's the end of my life. 405 00:13:50,445 --> 00:13:51,905 Just show me. 406 00:13:56,058 --> 00:13:58,477 Oh, my. 407 00:13:58,477 --> 00:14:00,813 That is... something. 408 00:14:00,813 --> 00:14:02,356 I can probably be homeschooled, right? 409 00:14:03,983 --> 00:14:05,651 It's okay. We can fix this. 410 00:14:05,651 --> 00:14:06,736 Before my parents get home? 411 00:14:06,736 --> 00:14:07,987 They're gonna kill me. 412 00:14:07,987 --> 00:14:09,238 Oh, man. 413 00:14:09,238 --> 00:14:10,823 Look at your head. 414 00:14:10,823 --> 00:14:12,742 Shut up! Georgie, don't make this worse. 415 00:14:12,742 --> 00:14:14,535 There's worse? 416 00:14:14,535 --> 00:14:15,995 Anyone home? 417 00:14:15,995 --> 00:14:17,997 Okay, stay here. We'll stall him. 418 00:14:17,997 --> 00:14:19,749 Do you see her head? 419 00:14:19,749 --> 00:14:21,167 Oh. 420 00:14:21,167 --> 00:14:23,711 Hey. What's up? 421 00:14:23,711 --> 00:14:26,213 Nothing. Nada. Absolutely nothing. 422 00:14:26,213 --> 00:14:27,548 Where are the kids? 423 00:14:28,507 --> 00:14:30,718 Well, I believe Sheldon's at Billy's. 424 00:14:31,677 --> 00:14:33,596 Oh, good. He's helping him. 425 00:14:33,596 --> 00:14:35,681 Mm. And Missy? 426 00:14:35,681 --> 00:14:37,099 Missy... 427 00:14:37,099 --> 00:14:38,851 That's a good question. 428 00:14:38,851 --> 00:14:40,394 I haven't seen her. 429 00:14:40,394 --> 00:14:44,190 I have not seen her, personally, myself. 430 00:14:45,191 --> 00:14:46,525 Okay. 431 00:14:51,989 --> 00:14:53,324 We're a good team, me and you. 432 00:14:53,324 --> 00:14:54,617 Oh, not now, Georgie. 433 00:14:55,743 --> 00:14:58,287 I'm afraid I have some bad news. 434 00:14:58,287 --> 00:15:01,040 If you mean I'm gonna be left back, it's okay. 435 00:15:01,040 --> 00:15:02,082 You tried. 436 00:15:02,082 --> 00:15:04,001 No. Well, maybe. 437 00:15:04,001 --> 00:15:05,795 I have bad news about zero. 438 00:15:05,795 --> 00:15:07,254 It doesn't exist. 439 00:15:07,254 --> 00:15:08,714 So I was right? 440 00:15:08,714 --> 00:15:10,424 No one is more shocked than I am. 441 00:15:10,424 --> 00:15:12,885 I can't help you with your test. 442 00:15:12,885 --> 00:15:15,137 Without zero, I don't even know what math is anymore. 443 00:15:15,137 --> 00:15:16,388 Hmm. 444 00:15:16,388 --> 00:15:18,474 Yeah. Hmm. 445 00:15:18,474 --> 00:15:20,976 What if we just pretend it exists? 446 00:15:21,977 --> 00:15:24,563 Are you saying to accept zero as an act of faith? 447 00:15:24,563 --> 00:15:25,439 Was I? 448 00:15:25,439 --> 00:15:26,899 I think so. 449 00:15:26,899 --> 00:15:28,442 Okay. 450 00:15:28,442 --> 00:15:30,361 My mom accepts God as an act of faith, 451 00:15:30,361 --> 00:15:32,279 and zero is way more useful than God. 452 00:15:32,279 --> 00:15:34,990 Do not say that around Pastor Jeff. Think about it. 453 00:15:34,990 --> 00:15:36,659 Without zero, we wouldn't have calculus. 454 00:15:36,659 --> 00:15:38,953 Without God, we wouldn't have Spanish Inquisition. 455 00:15:38,953 --> 00:15:41,455 I know the Spanish word for "fajita." 456 00:15:41,455 --> 00:15:43,123 And don't forget-- before the Big Bang, 457 00:15:43,123 --> 00:15:44,458 there was actually nothing. 458 00:15:44,458 --> 00:15:45,835 It's "fajita." 459 00:15:45,835 --> 00:15:47,962 So you could say the entire universe 460 00:15:47,962 --> 00:15:49,421 was born out of zero. 461 00:15:49,421 --> 00:15:52,258 Meaning that zero created the universe, not God. 462 00:15:52,258 --> 00:15:54,260 Maybe we should pray to it. 463 00:15:54,260 --> 00:15:55,636 I think we should. 464 00:15:57,429 --> 00:15:59,431 Zero, it's me, Sheldon. 465 00:15:59,431 --> 00:16:00,891 I know I doubted you, but in my defense, 466 00:16:00,891 --> 00:16:02,810 you're literally nothing. 467 00:16:02,810 --> 00:16:05,104 I would like to thank you for all the gifts you've given us-- 468 00:16:05,104 --> 00:16:07,439 the null set, Fibonacci sequence, 469 00:16:07,439 --> 00:16:08,816 binary language. 470 00:16:08,816 --> 00:16:10,818 I could go on ad infinitum, 471 00:16:10,818 --> 00:16:12,194 but not without you. 472 00:16:12,194 --> 00:16:14,697 Ask Zero to help me pass my test. 473 00:16:14,697 --> 00:16:16,448 Zero's not magic. You still have to study. 474 00:16:16,448 --> 00:16:18,659 Oh. Then I'm going back to Jesus. 475 00:16:18,659 --> 00:16:20,619 Jesus, please help me. 476 00:16:20,619 --> 00:16:23,122 I'm already the biggest kid in sixth grade. 477 00:16:24,623 --> 00:16:27,084 Amen. 478 00:16:32,631 --> 00:16:34,466 Hello? Who's in there? 479 00:16:34,466 --> 00:16:36,010 Me. 480 00:16:36,010 --> 00:16:37,469 I need to use the bathroom. 481 00:16:37,469 --> 00:16:38,971 Give me a minute. 482 00:16:42,224 --> 00:16:44,977 Can someone give me a hand with these groceries? 483 00:16:44,977 --> 00:16:46,395 Sure. Dad, come on. 484 00:16:46,395 --> 00:16:47,897 I got to go to the bathroom. 485 00:16:47,897 --> 00:16:49,356 Hey, Mandy. 486 00:16:49,356 --> 00:16:50,399 Mrs. Cooper. 487 00:16:50,399 --> 00:16:51,984 What brings you here? 488 00:16:52,985 --> 00:16:54,320 Just saying hi to Georgie. 489 00:16:55,362 --> 00:16:57,198 Why, hello to you, too. 490 00:16:58,741 --> 00:17:00,367 Let's get a move on. 491 00:17:03,662 --> 00:17:05,039 Oh, boy. 492 00:17:05,039 --> 00:17:07,041 Damn it, Missy. I'm two seconds away 493 00:17:07,041 --> 00:17:08,918 from peeing in your mother's prayer garden. 494 00:17:08,918 --> 00:17:11,503 Look what I found. 495 00:17:11,503 --> 00:17:13,005 What the hell? 496 00:17:13,005 --> 00:17:13,881 Melissa Cooper, 497 00:17:13,881 --> 00:17:15,341 what did you do? 498 00:17:15,341 --> 00:17:17,551 Yeah. What did you do? 499 00:17:18,594 --> 00:17:19,845 Yeah. 500 00:17:19,845 --> 00:17:21,180 Good news. I think Billy 501 00:17:21,180 --> 00:17:23,057 might pass his math test tomorrow. 502 00:17:23,057 --> 00:17:24,767 There's a math test tomorrow? 503 00:17:24,767 --> 00:17:26,518 Your hair is upsetting me. 504 00:17:26,518 --> 00:17:28,395 Screw it. I'm going outside. 505 00:17:38,948 --> 00:17:40,532 You can cheat off me if you want. 506 00:17:40,532 --> 00:17:41,617 I studied. 507 00:17:41,617 --> 00:17:43,077 Thanks. 508 00:17:44,328 --> 00:17:46,872 I'm not saying it was God or zero, 509 00:17:46,872 --> 00:17:49,458 but a small miracle did happen that day. 510 00:17:49,458 --> 00:17:52,127 Billy passed the test with a 68 511 00:17:52,127 --> 00:17:55,047 and went on to the seventh grade. 512 00:17:55,047 --> 00:17:57,591 Where he remained for the next several years. 33465

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