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00:00:01,219 --> 00:00:05,109
I am committed to expanding
and improving public transit
2
00:00:05,188 --> 00:00:08,057
because it's hardworking
Angelenos like these
3
00:00:08,084 --> 00:00:10,656
that are the lifeblood of our city.
4
00:00:10,681 --> 00:00:13,449
So as... oh! Hey there, pal.
5
00:00:13,548 --> 00:00:16,355
May I ask why you got
on the bus today with no pants?
6
00:00:16,441 --> 00:00:19,776
How else am I supposed to get
to the pants store, idiot?
7
00:00:19,811 --> 00:00:21,245
Well, there you go.
8
00:00:21,271 --> 00:00:23,272
Whether it's a pants store or City Hall,
9
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LA Metro will get you there.
10
00:00:24,882 --> 00:00:25,849
Now, as mayor...
11
00:00:25,883 --> 00:00:27,184
You're not the mayor.
12
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I'm the mayor.
13
00:00:28,620 --> 00:00:30,520
Well, let's just agree
to disagree, shall we?
14
00:00:30,555 --> 00:00:31,955
Mayor fight!
15
00:00:31,990 --> 00:00:33,123
Mayor fight!
16
00:00:33,148 --> 00:00:34,549
Stop, come on. Stop...
17
00:00:43,468 --> 00:00:44,735
Good morning, Mr. Mayor.
18
00:00:44,769 --> 00:00:46,270
I'm not sure who needs to know this,
19
00:00:46,304 --> 00:00:48,672
but FYI, on the 733 bus,
20
00:00:48,706 --> 00:00:50,540
I'm no longer the mayor of this city.
21
00:00:50,575 --> 00:00:52,209
That bus mayor was
stronger than you, sir.
22
00:00:52,243 --> 00:00:53,910
Hey, Jayden,
23
00:00:53,945 --> 00:00:56,813
I found the mayor's little
bus speech real original.
24
00:00:56,848 --> 00:00:57,781
It actually wasn't.
25
00:00:57,815 --> 00:00:59,549
To save time,
I just took his last speech
26
00:00:59,584 --> 00:01:01,551
and changed "algae bloom"
to "bus passengers."
27
00:01:01,586 --> 00:01:04,288
- I was being sarcastic.
- Well, you're great at it.
28
00:01:04,322 --> 00:01:05,421
Yeah, Jayden,
29
00:01:05,446 --> 00:01:08,392
Twitter has started to notice
that we're recycling speeches.
30
00:01:08,418 --> 00:01:11,420
Small businesses are
the lifeblood of this city.
31
00:01:11,462 --> 00:01:14,598
Reasonably-priced produce
is the lifeblood of this city.
32
00:01:14,632 --> 00:01:16,800
The passing of Archbishop Sheehan
33
00:01:16,834 --> 00:01:19,136
is the lifeblood... you're killing me.
34
00:01:19,170 --> 00:01:22,039
Yeah, the comms department
may be stretched a little thin.
35
00:01:22,073 --> 00:01:24,007
- Why, thank you.
- I'm on it, sir.
36
00:01:24,042 --> 00:01:25,509
I put up listings for a speechwriter
37
00:01:25,543 --> 00:01:27,344
on LinkedIn, Monster, Craigslist.
38
00:01:27,378 --> 00:01:28,779
I've already gotten some responses
39
00:01:28,813 --> 00:01:30,280
that weren't genital photographs.
40
00:01:30,315 --> 00:01:31,682
Great. So, Jayden,
41
00:01:31,716 --> 00:01:33,650
start going through résumés
and pick someone.
42
00:01:33,685 --> 00:01:34,618
I don't know.
43
00:01:34,652 --> 00:01:36,586
I once hired someone
to assemble a bookshelf,
44
00:01:36,621 --> 00:01:39,589
and yada, yada, yada.
Stole my TV, dated my mom.
45
00:01:39,624 --> 00:01:41,625
Come on, this is a chance
for you to step up
46
00:01:41,659 --> 00:01:43,060
and be a man.
47
00:01:43,094 --> 00:01:46,296
Or a strong, capable woman.
48
00:01:46,331 --> 00:01:48,231
But I'm more of a creative genius
49
00:01:48,266 --> 00:01:49,466
than a manager.
50
00:01:49,500 --> 00:01:51,168
I have faith in you, Jayden.
51
00:01:51,202 --> 00:01:53,337
Just find someone
who makes your life easier
52
00:01:53,371 --> 00:01:54,771
and hire that person.
53
00:01:54,806 --> 00:01:57,274
Or woman.
54
00:01:57,308 --> 00:01:58,775
Moving on, Ms. Meskimen
55
00:01:58,810 --> 00:02:00,477
this morning will be in Brentwood.
56
00:02:00,511 --> 00:02:02,713
I love a town hall.
57
00:02:02,747 --> 00:02:04,081
Democracy at work,
58
00:02:04,115 --> 00:02:06,016
people getting heated over ideas,
59
00:02:06,050 --> 00:02:08,752
and in LA, there's always
some dingbat celebrity there,
60
00:02:08,786 --> 00:02:09,720
running their mouth,
61
00:02:09,754 --> 00:02:11,455
and I get to tell them
they're not special.
62
00:02:11,489 --> 00:02:13,390
I don't even understand
why we need to build
63
00:02:13,424 --> 00:02:15,459
low-income housing here.
64
00:02:15,493 --> 00:02:18,095
I already have a home. I have ten homes.
65
00:02:18,129 --> 00:02:19,229
Life is easy for me.
66
00:02:19,263 --> 00:02:20,630
You're not special!
67
00:02:20,665 --> 00:02:23,333
Yeah, this is gonna be a fun one.
68
00:02:23,368 --> 00:02:25,302
All those rich Brentwood turkeys think
69
00:02:25,336 --> 00:02:26,970
they're too good for trash.
70
00:02:27,004 --> 00:02:29,039
Wait a second. Is this
about the recycling center?
71
00:02:29,073 --> 00:02:30,207
Because I should be there.
72
00:02:30,241 --> 00:02:32,008
It's Brentwood. Those are my people.
73
00:02:32,043 --> 00:02:33,110
Arpi, I'm sorry,
74
00:02:33,144 --> 00:02:34,344
but I need to take the lead on this.
75
00:02:34,379 --> 00:02:38,682
Great. You have my complete
confidence and support, sir.
76
00:02:39,784 --> 00:02:41,118
Not.
77
00:02:41,152 --> 00:02:42,486
Not what?
78
00:02:42,520 --> 00:02:45,655
I said you had
my confidence and support.
79
00:02:45,690 --> 00:02:47,924
That was an hour and a half ago.
80
00:02:47,959 --> 00:02:49,493
I can't trust you around these people.
81
00:02:49,527 --> 00:02:51,094
You're one of them.
You're gonna get up there
82
00:02:51,129 --> 00:02:52,129
in front of those one percenters
83
00:02:52,163 --> 00:02:53,463
and fold like a card table.
84
00:02:53,498 --> 00:02:55,665
How you do you fold a card table, Arpi?
85
00:02:55,700 --> 00:02:58,001
They're made of solid wood
with cup holders
86
00:02:58,035 --> 00:02:59,469
so you don't pucker the felt.
87
00:02:59,504 --> 00:03:01,571
You're proving my point.
Card tables are plastic!
88
00:03:01,606 --> 00:03:03,407
You put them in the yard
to serve Crystal Light on
89
00:03:03,441 --> 00:03:04,674
after someone gets shot
90
00:03:04,709 --> 00:03:07,110
and you're all just
milling around in shock.
91
00:03:07,145 --> 00:03:09,146
Ah, come if you want,
92
00:03:09,180 --> 00:03:11,148
but you have nothing to worry about.
93
00:03:11,182 --> 00:03:12,649
I'm coming, and we're playing
94
00:03:12,683 --> 00:03:14,818
my pre-town hall psych-up music.
95
00:03:14,852 --> 00:03:17,954
Officer, plug this
into the RCA jack, please.
96
00:03:17,989 --> 00:03:18,889
Get ready to get pumped.
97
00:03:18,923 --> 00:03:22,859
♪ California would not hold me ♪
98
00:03:22,894 --> 00:03:26,663
♪ Though I loved her timber mountains ♪
99
00:03:26,697 --> 00:03:28,365
Hey. Mikaela, right?
100
00:03:28,399 --> 00:03:31,034
Orly. Hi, and hello.
101
00:03:31,068 --> 00:03:32,602
Is my dad around?
102
00:03:32,637 --> 00:03:34,738
A pipe burst at school,
so they let us go early.
103
00:03:34,772 --> 00:03:37,441
Oh, no. Shoot. His schedule changed.
104
00:03:37,475 --> 00:03:39,342
But you can hang out here, little homey.
105
00:03:39,377 --> 00:03:42,312
Homeys gotta homework. Homework. Boo.
106
00:03:42,346 --> 00:03:44,848
I can't believe her. Whatever.
107
00:03:44,882 --> 00:03:47,684
What's wrong? Leaked nudes? Frenemy?
108
00:03:47,718 --> 00:03:49,719
Just a stupid orchestra concert today.
109
00:03:49,754 --> 00:03:52,355
Today? What about the pipe?
110
00:03:52,390 --> 00:03:54,724
Wait, are you in the orchestra?
111
00:03:54,759 --> 00:03:58,061
I was orchestra manager,
so more on the biz side.
112
00:03:58,095 --> 00:04:01,932
I play flute, but it's not
like anyone's gonna miss me.
113
00:04:01,966 --> 00:04:04,801
So you lied about the pipe
114
00:04:04,836 --> 00:04:07,103
because you're nervous
about the concert.
115
00:04:07,138 --> 00:04:09,406
Oh, my God, no. "Nervous"?
116
00:04:09,440 --> 00:04:11,842
I murder the flute like Lizzo.
117
00:04:11,876 --> 00:04:14,211
I practiced all summer
to make first chair,
118
00:04:14,245 --> 00:04:16,146
and I did make first chair,
119
00:04:16,180 --> 00:04:18,849
but then Mr. Kenny gave
the solo in "Peer Gynt"
120
00:04:18,883 --> 00:04:21,918
to Abby Shapiro because he's a fascist,
121
00:04:21,953 --> 00:04:25,388
and it's like, what's even
the point of the chair system?
122
00:04:25,423 --> 00:04:28,625
It's so unfair, and I hate high school!
123
00:04:32,096 --> 00:04:33,763
Hey, FYI, the mayor's daughter's here,
124
00:04:33,798 --> 00:04:35,232
so this is how I'm going to play it.
125
00:04:35,266 --> 00:04:36,333
I'll do everything wrong
126
00:04:36,367 --> 00:04:38,235
so that she runs out of here furious.
127
00:04:38,269 --> 00:04:40,003
Wait, you beat me to it?
128
00:04:40,037 --> 00:04:43,106
Guess Mikaela wins again.
129
00:04:46,114 --> 00:04:47,393
Yeah.
130
00:04:49,823 --> 00:04:51,423
Listen. Listen.
131
00:04:51,473 --> 00:04:53,474
I know interviews can be nerve-racking.
132
00:04:53,891 --> 00:04:56,226
If you want, you can picture me
in my underwear.
133
00:04:56,261 --> 00:04:58,818
I brought a pair if it helps.
134
00:04:58,930 --> 00:05:00,264
So this would be
a bit of a change for you.
135
00:05:00,298 --> 00:05:02,599
You spent your whole career
in Puerto Rico.
136
00:05:02,634 --> 00:05:05,569
- Um, that's PR.
- For short.
137
00:05:05,603 --> 00:05:07,771
I went there once.
I got bit by a beach puppy.
138
00:05:07,805 --> 00:05:10,340
Yeah, I meant public relations.
139
00:05:10,375 --> 00:05:12,342
- Be careful.
- Oh, the chair?
140
00:05:12,377 --> 00:05:14,611
Don't worry. Not my first chair rodeo.
141
00:05:14,646 --> 00:05:16,980
Catch me!
142
00:05:17,015 --> 00:05:18,615
America so cool.
143
00:05:18,650 --> 00:05:22,152
USA number one party.
Diet starts Monday.
144
00:05:22,186 --> 00:05:23,587
Great, well, we'll be in touch, Sforg.
145
00:05:23,621 --> 00:05:26,156
Supers dupers, Jaydens. I love you.
146
00:05:26,190 --> 00:05:29,192
I cannot wait for you to meet my house.
147
00:05:29,227 --> 00:05:32,362
It is lonely at the top, Tommy.
148
00:05:32,397 --> 00:05:34,531
Hmm... interest level exceeded.
149
00:05:34,565 --> 00:05:35,899
Well, the mayor told me to hire someone
150
00:05:35,933 --> 00:05:37,200
that would make my life easier,
151
00:05:37,235 --> 00:05:39,369
but so far,
the best of the bunch is Sforg,
152
00:05:39,404 --> 00:05:41,371
and he's only here
because he's on paid vacation
153
00:05:41,406 --> 00:05:42,639
from a Swedish prison.
154
00:05:42,674 --> 00:05:44,875
For knife murders!
155
00:05:44,909 --> 00:05:46,643
- Europe is different.
- Yeah.
156
00:05:46,678 --> 00:05:49,513
Excuse me, Mr. Kwapis? I'm Derek Joshua.
157
00:05:49,547 --> 00:05:50,847
I applied for the speechwriter job.
158
00:05:50,882 --> 00:05:53,083
- Your tie is so funny.
- I know, right?
159
00:05:53,117 --> 00:05:55,819
It's like, "Uh, we're gonna
need a bigger shirt."
160
00:05:55,853 --> 00:05:58,021
I love movie quotes.
161
00:05:58,056 --> 00:06:00,390
"Yes, you called for the Ghostbusters."
162
00:06:00,425 --> 00:06:01,858
Oh, man! Okay.
163
00:06:01,893 --> 00:06:03,694
On three, say
your favorite "Ghostbusters."
164
00:06:03,728 --> 00:06:04,895
One, two, three.
165
00:06:04,929 --> 00:06:07,664
First boy "Ghostbusters."
166
00:06:07,699 --> 00:06:09,566
Why am I still standing here?
167
00:06:09,600 --> 00:06:12,803
Okay, I'd like to begin by pointing out
168
00:06:12,837 --> 00:06:14,838
that none of you deserve what you have.
169
00:06:14,872 --> 00:06:18,642
In fact, material wealth is,
if anything,
170
00:06:18,676 --> 00:06:20,177
inversely correlated
171
00:06:20,211 --> 00:06:22,179
with a person's worth as a human being.
172
00:06:22,213 --> 00:06:24,014
Now, here's someone you probably know
173
00:06:24,048 --> 00:06:27,184
from your Botox parties,
Mayor Neil Bremer.
174
00:06:31,089 --> 00:06:34,257
All right,
as a longtime Bel Air resident,
175
00:06:34,292 --> 00:06:36,626
I wanna make one thing clear:
176
00:06:36,661 --> 00:06:39,596
Westside, best side.
177
00:06:41,299 --> 00:06:44,801
That said, I fully support this project.
178
00:06:44,836 --> 00:06:47,204
Our city has a trash problem,
179
00:06:47,238 --> 00:06:50,273
and we can no longer rely
on my predecessor's plan
180
00:06:50,308 --> 00:06:51,908
to dump it all in the woods
181
00:06:51,943 --> 00:06:54,578
and wait till the fires take care of it.
182
00:06:54,612 --> 00:06:56,947
I know you have concerns,
183
00:06:56,981 --> 00:06:59,216
and I'm here to listen, so...
184
00:06:59,250 --> 00:07:01,985
Do you have any idea
how much rose quartz it'll take
185
00:07:02,019 --> 00:07:03,453
to counter the negative energy
186
00:07:03,488 --> 00:07:05,355
created by this sorting facility?
187
00:07:05,390 --> 00:07:08,925
- Um, 12.
- Touché.
188
00:07:08,960 --> 00:07:11,728
I see you've used
my being an idiot against me.
189
00:07:11,763 --> 00:07:13,296
Well played.
190
00:07:13,331 --> 00:07:14,464
Hi. David.
191
00:07:14,499 --> 00:07:18,201
Listen, we cannot have
a trash facility in Brentwood.
192
00:07:18,236 --> 00:07:20,704
I mean, come on, I moved here
to give my bees a better life.
193
00:07:20,738 --> 00:07:22,239
And I'm sure they appreciate that.
194
00:07:22,273 --> 00:07:25,075
Listen, if this affects
the flavor profile of my honey,
195
00:07:25,109 --> 00:07:26,810
you're gonna have to explain it
to Chrissy Teigen,
196
00:07:26,844 --> 00:07:30,013
because she has been...
197
00:07:30,047 --> 00:07:31,848
she's been my champion through all this.
198
00:07:31,883 --> 00:07:34,284
- Who the hell is this guy?
- David Spade, "SNL."
199
00:07:34,318 --> 00:07:36,653
- Never heard of him.
- "Joe Dirt"? No?
200
00:07:36,687 --> 00:07:38,348
It says under "special skills" that...
201
00:07:39,491 --> 00:07:41,184
_
202
00:07:42,309 --> 00:07:44,215
_
203
00:07:47,465 --> 00:07:49,099
- I would never.
- Good, 'cause...
204
00:07:50,968 --> 00:07:53,837
Look, obviously, I don't have
any experience in politics.
205
00:07:53,871 --> 00:07:55,272
You've done a lot of writing.
206
00:07:55,306 --> 00:07:57,163
Have any of your screenplays
ever been produced?
207
00:07:57,188 --> 00:07:58,141
Not yet.
208
00:07:58,185 --> 00:07:59,720
Hollywood's all about who you know,
209
00:07:59,745 --> 00:08:00,879
and my uncle won't introduce me
210
00:08:00,904 --> 00:08:02,470
to anyone at the studio he runs.
211
00:08:03,369 --> 00:08:04,657
_
212
00:08:04,682 --> 00:08:06,149
- Right?
- Yeah.
213
00:08:07,552 --> 00:08:10,420
There you are. Are you okay?
214
00:08:10,455 --> 00:08:12,389
Look, I get it.
215
00:08:12,423 --> 00:08:14,925
I was your age
just, like, ten years ago.
216
00:08:14,959 --> 00:08:16,927
That's such a long time.
217
00:08:16,961 --> 00:08:19,863
It's actually... it is.
218
00:08:19,897 --> 00:08:22,132
High school was
really rough for me, too.
219
00:08:22,166 --> 00:08:25,402
I had a widow's peak
that connected to my unibrow.
220
00:08:25,436 --> 00:08:28,805
I gave the nurse the other half
of my "Best Friends" necklace.
221
00:08:28,840 --> 00:08:30,006
Then I found it in the trash later.
222
00:08:30,041 --> 00:08:31,675
- Please stop.
- Yeah.
223
00:08:31,709 --> 00:08:33,310
- I get it.
- Mm-hmm.
224
00:08:33,344 --> 00:08:34,311
But look at me now.
225
00:08:34,345 --> 00:08:39,182
Two eyebrows, a whole forehead,
kickass job,
226
00:08:39,217 --> 00:08:42,886
and Nurse Kelly has
a pretty big opioid problem.
227
00:08:42,920 --> 00:08:45,355
High school's so stupid.
228
00:08:45,389 --> 00:08:47,457
Being first chair doesn't mean anything.
229
00:08:47,492 --> 00:08:49,559
Being class president
doesn't even mean anything.
230
00:08:49,594 --> 00:08:53,563
My only power is choosing
the themes for school dances,
231
00:08:53,598 --> 00:08:55,298
and the faculty adviser overruled
232
00:08:55,333 --> 00:08:57,133
"Consent Under the Sea."
233
00:08:57,168 --> 00:08:58,802
Just wait.
234
00:08:58,836 --> 00:09:01,834
Grown-up life isn't high school.
I promise.
235
00:09:03,608 --> 00:09:05,742
Thanks, Mikaela.
236
00:09:05,776 --> 00:09:07,577
Your eyebrows look really separate.
237
00:09:07,612 --> 00:09:09,513
Oh, my God. Thank you.
238
00:09:09,547 --> 00:09:11,114
Now, let's go get on Instagram,
239
00:09:11,148 --> 00:09:12,716
and I'll show you
what all that sun damage
240
00:09:12,750 --> 00:09:15,018
and drinking does to the cool kids.
241
00:09:15,052 --> 00:09:16,786
They look so bad.
242
00:09:16,821 --> 00:09:18,588
Easy.
243
00:09:18,623 --> 00:09:19,990
- Marry Ms. Butterworth.
- Yep.
244
00:09:20,024 --> 00:09:21,725
- Eff the Land O' Lakes chick,
- Damn right.
245
00:09:21,759 --> 00:09:23,393
- Kill the Utz girl.
- Correct.
246
00:09:23,427 --> 00:09:24,594
Hey, speaking of food,
247
00:09:24,629 --> 00:09:25,695
I don't have any more interviews
248
00:09:25,730 --> 00:09:27,163
until this afternoon.
249
00:09:27,198 --> 00:09:28,932
Do you wanna maybe grab some lunch?
250
00:09:28,966 --> 00:09:31,535
I know it's only 11:00,
but I really like it when...
251
00:09:31,569 --> 00:09:33,603
You're the first order
on the griddle after breakfast?
252
00:09:33,638 --> 00:09:35,005
Yeah, 'cause then your...
253
00:09:35,039 --> 00:09:38,208
Lunch tastes like pancakes.
254
00:09:38,242 --> 00:09:40,343
My child is not vaccinated,
255
00:09:40,378 --> 00:09:42,879
and for some reason,
she is very sick all the time,
256
00:09:42,914 --> 00:09:45,582
and now you wanna
surround her with trash?
257
00:09:45,616 --> 00:09:47,951
What she needs is more horses.
258
00:09:47,985 --> 00:09:49,753
Okay, get outta here. Next person.
259
00:09:49,787 --> 00:09:51,321
Hi, I'm Andie,
260
00:09:51,355 --> 00:09:55,025
president of the Brentwood
Homeowners Association,
261
00:09:55,059 --> 00:09:56,960
and my hair just dries like this.
262
00:10:05,403 --> 00:10:07,404
You're Andie MacDowell
263
00:10:07,438 --> 00:10:09,940
from "Multiplicity" and "Groundhog Day"
264
00:10:09,974 --> 00:10:13,143
and that Calvin Klein
commercial back in the '80s.
265
00:10:13,177 --> 00:10:14,945
You were wearing jeans.
266
00:10:18,433 --> 00:10:20,956
Sproing.
267
00:10:24,771 --> 00:10:27,373
Why do you look like
Pikachu week on "Drag Race"?
268
00:10:27,461 --> 00:10:29,904
Because my speechwriter search is over.
269
00:10:29,929 --> 00:10:31,563
Derek and I just had the funnest time
270
00:10:31,588 --> 00:10:32,922
at Universal Studios.
271
00:10:32,947 --> 00:10:34,984
We both have the same favorite Minion...
272
00:10:35,009 --> 00:10:36,543
Stu, duh...
273
00:10:36,568 --> 00:10:40,114
we both love pizza and music,
and he's an awesome writer.
274
00:10:40,139 --> 00:10:41,547
His new screenplay is about,
275
00:10:41,572 --> 00:10:44,067
what if Marty McFly had married his mom?
276
00:10:45,426 --> 00:10:47,229
So this Derek would be
277
00:10:47,254 --> 00:10:49,930
someone you'd talk to instead of me?
278
00:10:49,964 --> 00:10:51,826
Yeah.
279
00:10:51,873 --> 00:10:54,061
- Go to him.
- Sorry.
280
00:10:54,086 --> 00:10:55,153
Excuse me.
281
00:10:55,178 --> 00:10:56,979
- Are you Jayden Kwapis?
- Yeah.
282
00:10:57,004 --> 00:10:58,338
I've been waiting for two hours
283
00:10:58,372 --> 00:11:00,740
to meet with you about
the speechwriter position.
284
00:11:00,775 --> 00:11:03,043
I'm so sorry. Right this way.
285
00:11:03,077 --> 00:11:06,046
This won't take long.
286
00:11:06,080 --> 00:11:08,248
Master's in public policy?
287
00:11:08,282 --> 00:11:10,984
Deputy speechwriter for Governor Brown?
288
00:11:11,018 --> 00:11:13,587
Chief speechwriter for Maxine Waters?
289
00:11:13,621 --> 00:11:16,723
And also a felon?
290
00:11:16,757 --> 00:11:18,558
Banana!
291
00:11:18,593 --> 00:11:22,295
I know Los Angeles needs
a new recycling facility.
292
00:11:22,330 --> 00:11:26,633
I mean, this town certainly has
its share of plastic.
293
00:11:26,667 --> 00:11:27,968
Surgery, that is.
294
00:11:29,670 --> 00:11:30,937
Oh, that's wonderful.
295
00:11:30,972 --> 00:11:32,639
I mean, I knew you could be funny
296
00:11:32,673 --> 00:11:34,107
on film, Ms. MacDowell, but...
297
00:11:34,142 --> 00:11:35,809
Oh, call me Andie.
298
00:11:35,843 --> 00:11:37,677
And you can call me Hoops.
299
00:11:37,712 --> 00:11:39,346
I played basketball, you know.
300
00:11:39,380 --> 00:11:43,016
Obviously, I...
301
00:11:43,050 --> 00:11:44,918
Oppose your plan.
302
00:11:48,756 --> 00:11:51,124
Oh, what was I saying?
303
00:11:51,159 --> 00:11:53,260
Doesn't matter.
304
00:11:53,294 --> 00:11:54,661
No, no, no, no, no. Take your time.
305
00:11:54,695 --> 00:11:56,329
I love watching you think.
306
00:11:56,364 --> 00:12:00,667
I was saying, call me crazy,
but I don't like garbage.
307
00:12:00,701 --> 00:12:02,335
Who does?
308
00:12:02,370 --> 00:12:05,205
Oscar the Grouch, sure,
but he's a puppet being silly.
309
00:12:05,239 --> 00:12:07,974
What is he doing out there?
Get in the game, Hoops!
310
00:12:08,009 --> 00:12:10,177
Listen, Andie,
we're having this dialogue
311
00:12:10,211 --> 00:12:12,312
because nothing's set in stone.
312
00:12:12,346 --> 00:12:14,047
Son of a bitch is folding.
313
00:12:14,081 --> 00:12:16,049
If you would like
to discuss this further,
314
00:12:16,083 --> 00:12:19,786
you know, like, over dinner...
315
00:12:19,820 --> 00:12:21,254
Do you like food?
316
00:12:21,289 --> 00:12:23,356
Excuse us. Five-minute recess.
317
00:12:23,391 --> 00:12:24,591
Talk amongst yourselves
318
00:12:24,625 --> 00:12:28,461
about your empty, materialistic lives.
319
00:12:28,496 --> 00:12:29,396
I knew it.
320
00:12:29,430 --> 00:12:30,630
I knew you wouldn't be able
321
00:12:30,665 --> 00:12:32,332
to stand up to your fellow plutocrats.
322
00:12:32,366 --> 00:12:33,967
- No.
- You disgust me.
323
00:12:34,001 --> 00:12:36,369
It's not that. No, it's her.
324
00:12:36,404 --> 00:12:39,573
Who? Tall-y McBeautiful?
325
00:12:39,607 --> 00:12:41,808
- Boring.
- You don't understand.
326
00:12:41,842 --> 00:12:43,543
I've been in love before.
327
00:12:43,578 --> 00:12:46,680
I've been married twice, but...
328
00:12:46,714 --> 00:12:49,349
Andie MacDowell...
329
00:12:49,383 --> 00:12:52,986
Have you seen "Greystoke:
The Legend of Tarzan"?
330
00:12:53,020 --> 00:12:56,122
She's in this nightgown,
combing her hair,
331
00:12:56,157 --> 00:12:57,390
and then Tarzan comes in,
332
00:12:57,425 --> 00:13:00,827
and then he starts combing her hair.
333
00:13:00,861 --> 00:13:02,429
Oh, come on.
334
00:13:02,463 --> 00:13:04,030
Don't you have anyone in your life
335
00:13:04,065 --> 00:13:06,833
who just pushes all your buttons?
336
00:13:06,867 --> 00:13:08,435
Harvey Milk.
337
00:13:08,469 --> 00:13:10,070
I know, I know. He's dead.
338
00:13:10,104 --> 00:13:13,106
I rented "St. Elmo's Fire"
so many times,
339
00:13:13,140 --> 00:13:15,141
when Blockbuster went out of business,
340
00:13:15,176 --> 00:13:17,110
they just gave me the tape.
341
00:13:17,144 --> 00:13:19,713
Arpi, I wanna do the right thing here.
342
00:13:19,747 --> 00:13:22,148
I wanna be a good mayor,
343
00:13:22,183 --> 00:13:24,484
but I'm going to go out
to dinner with her,
344
00:13:24,518 --> 00:13:26,353
and I will fold.
345
00:13:26,387 --> 00:13:28,054
Probably gonna buy her a Mercedes.
346
00:13:28,089 --> 00:13:29,889
What the hell do you want me to do?
347
00:13:29,924 --> 00:13:31,424
If she's really your Harvey Milk,
348
00:13:31,459 --> 00:13:32,892
this train's off the tracks.
349
00:13:32,927 --> 00:13:35,195
I don't know.
350
00:13:35,229 --> 00:13:37,163
Just do something.
351
00:13:39,166 --> 00:13:40,367
Hi, there, stranger.
352
00:13:40,401 --> 00:13:43,803
Hey. Where were we?
353
00:13:43,838 --> 00:13:45,639
This is Sophia Ladaro.
354
00:13:45,673 --> 00:13:47,340
She used to call me "Teen Wolf."
355
00:13:47,375 --> 00:13:49,776
Now look how sad and ugly she is.
356
00:13:49,810 --> 00:13:52,712
Oh, it says she's at her mom's funeral.
357
00:13:52,747 --> 00:13:55,515
Yeah, so that's her dressed up.
358
00:13:55,549 --> 00:13:59,519
Well, I have a zit,
and it's picture day.
359
00:13:59,560 --> 00:14:02,496
For our photo IDs? My life is over.
360
00:14:04,258 --> 00:14:05,925
How is this any different
than high school?
361
00:14:05,960 --> 00:14:06,996
What?
362
00:14:07,021 --> 00:14:09,262
You've spent hours making fun of people,
363
00:14:09,297 --> 00:14:11,431
this guy's freaking out over a pimple,
364
00:14:11,465 --> 00:14:13,233
and I'm pretty sure
you're only talking to me
365
00:14:13,267 --> 00:14:14,501
because of who my dad is.
366
00:14:14,535 --> 00:14:16,536
What? No. Orly, we're buddies.
367
00:14:16,570 --> 00:14:18,371
I requested to follow you on Instagram.
368
00:14:18,406 --> 00:14:19,806
Did you see it, or...
369
00:14:19,840 --> 00:14:20,840
And those ladies.
370
00:14:20,875 --> 00:14:23,710
They've spent all day
reading people to filth.
371
00:14:24,015 --> 00:14:27,163
_
372
00:14:27,615 --> 00:14:29,082
Yeah, don't mess with them.
373
00:14:29,116 --> 00:14:31,084
We call them "Las Plasticas."
374
00:14:31,118 --> 00:14:32,585
You were wrong, Mikaela.
375
00:14:32,620 --> 00:14:35,622
Real life is high school. It never ends!
376
00:14:35,656 --> 00:14:38,758
- No, Orly, that's not true.
- Guys, I'm freaking out.
377
00:14:38,793 --> 00:14:40,827
I know Valerie is perfect
or whatever, but I'm worried
378
00:14:40,861 --> 00:14:42,429
that Derek won't
wanna be my friend anymore
379
00:14:42,463 --> 00:14:43,930
if I don't pick him, and he's so cool,
380
00:14:43,964 --> 00:14:46,099
and he drives stick, and also
my mom packed me raisins
381
00:14:46,133 --> 00:14:48,101
if anyone wants to trade.
382
00:14:48,135 --> 00:14:50,337
Oh, my God. It never ends.
383
00:14:50,371 --> 00:14:51,905
High school never ends.
384
00:14:51,939 --> 00:14:53,406
What? No!
385
00:14:53,441 --> 00:14:55,208
I don't wanna have to run
the mile again.
386
00:14:55,242 --> 00:14:57,210
Everybody get out of my room!
387
00:14:59,647 --> 00:15:01,948
Mercedes has this paint finish
388
00:15:01,982 --> 00:15:03,717
they call "Denim Blue."
389
00:15:03,751 --> 00:15:05,285
I think it would look great on you.
390
00:15:05,319 --> 00:15:07,454
Excuse me, Mr. Mayor?
391
00:15:07,488 --> 00:15:08,788
I'd like to ask some questions.
392
00:15:08,823 --> 00:15:10,990
No, shut up. You're not from Brentwood.
393
00:15:11,025 --> 00:15:12,359
No, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
394
00:15:12,393 --> 00:15:13,626
Please help me.
395
00:15:13,661 --> 00:15:16,496
You're right. I'm not from Brentwood.
396
00:15:16,530 --> 00:15:20,333
Eastside, beast side.
397
00:15:20,368 --> 00:15:22,302
As a resident of Greater Los Angeles,
398
00:15:22,336 --> 00:15:23,770
I'd just like to know where
399
00:15:23,804 --> 00:15:26,439
the president of the Brentwood
Homeowners Association
400
00:15:26,474 --> 00:15:27,807
thinks this trash should go.
401
00:15:27,842 --> 00:15:30,777
Oh. Well, anywhere else, really.
402
00:15:30,811 --> 00:15:33,012
Because Brentwood is so special.
403
00:15:33,047 --> 00:15:34,681
Thank you. Yes.
404
00:15:34,715 --> 00:15:38,251
And the people that live here
like clean, open spaces.
405
00:15:38,285 --> 00:15:39,686
And other neighborhoods don't.
406
00:15:39,720 --> 00:15:41,154
Apparently not.
407
00:15:41,188 --> 00:15:42,722
I mean, just look at those places.
408
00:15:42,757 --> 00:15:45,992
Everywhere you turn,
there is a graffito.
409
00:15:46,026 --> 00:15:47,360
I mean, come on.
410
00:15:47,395 --> 00:15:49,763
The taxes that we pay.
411
00:15:49,797 --> 00:15:53,009
- We don't deserve this.
- Oh, God.
412
00:15:53,034 --> 00:15:56,236
But someone like me deserves your trash?
413
00:15:56,270 --> 00:15:58,805
That is an amazing solution.
414
00:15:58,839 --> 00:16:02,275
I think that you would love my trash.
415
00:16:02,309 --> 00:16:03,343
What? No. No, no, no.
416
00:16:03,377 --> 00:16:07,347
You know, my trash has
perfectly good food in it.
417
00:16:07,381 --> 00:16:09,282
Clothes with the tags still on it.
418
00:16:09,316 --> 00:16:11,785
And I throw out
all the skincare products
419
00:16:11,819 --> 00:16:14,854
that companies send me
because I don't need 'em.
420
00:16:14,889 --> 00:16:17,757
This is wonderful.
What else do you throw out?
421
00:16:17,792 --> 00:16:20,760
Honestly, anything
that doesn't spark joy.
422
00:16:20,795 --> 00:16:25,398
Oh, you know, normally,
I give my old bags to my maid,
423
00:16:25,433 --> 00:16:27,600
but if you like it...
424
00:16:27,635 --> 00:16:29,302
It does have a monogram, though.
425
00:16:29,336 --> 00:16:31,638
I love it! And, hey, what do you know?
426
00:16:31,672 --> 00:16:33,840
AM. Those are my initials.
427
00:16:33,874 --> 00:16:36,376
Oh, I can't wait to tell my psychic!
428
00:16:36,410 --> 00:16:38,511
Well, it's settled.
429
00:16:38,546 --> 00:16:41,014
Our trash goes there.
430
00:16:41,048 --> 00:16:43,650
No!
431
00:16:43,684 --> 00:16:46,719
No! You people are awful!
432
00:16:46,754 --> 00:16:49,889
We're building the facility,
Andie, in Brentwood,
433
00:16:49,924 --> 00:16:52,625
and I'm not buying you a Mercedes.
434
00:16:52,660 --> 00:16:56,095
You're nothing like your
character from "Groundhog Day."
435
00:16:56,130 --> 00:16:58,431
I can't believe that I fantasized
436
00:16:58,466 --> 00:17:01,100
about settling down
in Punxsutawney with you.
437
00:17:01,135 --> 00:17:04,871
Well, I can't believe I was
gonna let you comb my hair.
438
00:17:04,905 --> 00:17:07,907
Oh, dear, I'm so sorry.
439
00:17:07,942 --> 00:17:10,182
I need the bag back.
I've got a dog in there.
440
00:17:10,207 --> 00:17:12,508
Thanks. Whew!
441
00:17:16,680 --> 00:17:18,413
There you are.
442
00:17:18,448 --> 00:17:20,996
Holy crap. Did you eat all that candy?
443
00:17:21,027 --> 00:17:23,561
This is what I used to do
in high school.
444
00:17:23,614 --> 00:17:24,747
Do you wanna ditch and go memorize
445
00:17:24,782 --> 00:17:26,049
the dance from "Toxic"?
446
00:17:26,083 --> 00:17:27,283
I don't know what that is.
447
00:17:29,252 --> 00:17:31,487
Actually, I'm gonna take off.
448
00:17:31,521 --> 00:17:33,689
My dad said to call a car
and meet him at home, so...
449
00:17:33,723 --> 00:17:36,392
Ugh, dads. Am I right?
450
00:17:36,426 --> 00:17:39,561
As if our days could get any worse.
451
00:17:39,596 --> 00:17:41,864
- You mean the orchestra thing?
- Mm-hmm.
452
00:17:41,898 --> 00:17:44,066
Turns out, Abby totally blew the solo
453
00:17:44,100 --> 00:17:45,334
in front of the whole school,
454
00:17:45,368 --> 00:17:47,069
and Ceviche Twitched the whole thing,
455
00:17:47,103 --> 00:17:48,070
and everyone was like,
456
00:17:48,104 --> 00:17:50,072
"Orly should have had it anyway."
457
00:17:50,106 --> 00:17:53,409
And then Josh Booker,
who's a senior at Westlake...
458
00:17:53,443 --> 00:17:55,077
- No.
- Found out I went home early,
459
00:17:55,111 --> 00:17:58,380
and he DM'd me and asked
if I was feeling okay.
460
00:17:58,415 --> 00:17:59,581
Cool.
461
00:17:59,616 --> 00:18:01,583
High school's so awesome.
462
00:18:01,618 --> 00:18:04,820
I love that life is just
high school forever.
463
00:18:04,854 --> 00:18:06,789
♪ Josh Booker ♪
464
00:18:06,823 --> 00:18:10,092
- Okay, bye!
- Yeah, I'm gonna go, too.
465
00:18:10,126 --> 00:18:13,462
Oh, Dios mío.
466
00:18:14,531 --> 00:18:17,566
- You did good in there, boss.
- Thanks.
467
00:18:17,600 --> 00:18:21,470
I'm just glad you were there
to ruin it all for me.
468
00:18:21,504 --> 00:18:24,106
Hey, anytime you need some interruptus,
469
00:18:24,140 --> 00:18:25,441
I'm your gal.
470
00:18:25,475 --> 00:18:27,109
My class at Reed was the only one
471
00:18:27,143 --> 00:18:30,112
in the history of the school
where no one got pregnant.
472
00:18:32,115 --> 00:18:33,015
What is it, Jayden?
473
00:18:33,049 --> 00:18:35,117
I can't decide
between Derek and Valerie.
474
00:18:35,151 --> 00:18:37,653
I'm gonna assume
those are two speechwriters.
475
00:18:37,687 --> 00:18:39,722
I mean, I know
Valerie is super qualified,
476
00:18:39,756 --> 00:18:42,558
but isn't friendship more
important than job goodness?
477
00:18:42,592 --> 00:18:44,626
Why do these people go on reality shows
478
00:18:44,661 --> 00:18:46,628
and say that they're not there
to make friends?
479
00:18:46,663 --> 00:18:48,797
- Are they crazy?
- Arpi.
480
00:18:48,832 --> 00:18:50,799
Listen up, Kwapis, in this job,
481
00:18:50,834 --> 00:18:53,002
your best and only friend
is the city of Los Angeles.
482
00:18:53,036 --> 00:18:53,869
She will help you move.
483
00:18:53,903 --> 00:18:56,005
She will pick you up at the airport.
484
00:18:56,039 --> 00:18:58,140
She will show up at 3:00 a.m.
with a pint of ice cream
485
00:18:58,174 --> 00:18:59,942
and tell you you're better off
without him.
486
00:18:59,976 --> 00:19:01,610
"Him" being Fresno, maybe. I don't know.
487
00:19:01,644 --> 00:19:04,613
This is getting away from me.
Do the right thing.
488
00:19:04,647 --> 00:19:07,483
- Yes, sir.
- Hmm.
489
00:19:07,517 --> 00:19:10,619
This sorting facility isn't just about
490
00:19:10,653 --> 00:19:12,588
cleaning up my predecessor's mess.
491
00:19:12,622 --> 00:19:15,591
It's the start
of a new, cleaner tomorrow
492
00:19:15,625 --> 00:19:17,159
for all of LA.
493
00:19:17,193 --> 00:19:18,794
Now, that's a speech.
494
00:19:18,828 --> 00:19:20,562
He sounds like Winston Churchill
495
00:19:20,597 --> 00:19:22,164
or Glenn Close in "The Wife."
496
00:19:22,198 --> 00:19:23,632
Thank you, Thomas.
497
00:19:23,666 --> 00:19:25,801
I thought the implicit zeugma
of "clean" really...
498
00:19:25,835 --> 00:19:28,871
Ugh. Yeah, great job, Valerie.
499
00:19:28,905 --> 00:19:32,674
I'm so glad that I hired you
and now all of Neil's speeches
500
00:19:32,709 --> 00:19:35,310
are "good" and "different
from each other."
501
00:19:37,347 --> 00:19:40,549
Even if it cost me a chance
with Tarzan's bride.
502
00:19:40,583 --> 00:19:42,217
And he's off script.
503
00:19:42,252 --> 00:19:44,720
I just thought me and Derek
would be best friends forever.
504
00:19:44,754 --> 00:19:46,722
Now he doesn't even return my texts.
505
00:19:46,756 --> 00:19:48,323
Welcome to high school, Jayden,
506
00:19:48,358 --> 00:19:51,026
where everything sucks forever and...
507
00:19:51,061 --> 00:19:53,362
"Orly Bremer followed you"?
Orly Bremer followed me!
508
00:19:53,396 --> 00:19:55,030
I can't hang out with you anymore.
509
00:19:55,065 --> 00:19:56,398
Hey, girl...
510
00:19:59,736 --> 00:20:04,073
Well, best friend, at least I got you.
511
00:20:04,107 --> 00:20:07,042
Ooh, why is my best friend so filthy?
512
00:20:07,077 --> 00:20:08,577
Bleh!
513
00:20:08,611 --> 00:20:10,212
Do you guys know how hard it is
514
00:20:10,246 --> 00:20:12,081
to get a bee startup going?
515
00:20:12,115 --> 00:20:13,851
I mean, I got J.J. Abrams in early,
516
00:20:13,876 --> 00:20:15,017
but now this guy's calling me,
517
00:20:15,058 --> 00:20:16,345
like, 50 times a day like,
"Where's my money?"
518
00:20:16,370 --> 00:20:17,647
I'm like, "I don't really know
what I'm doing,
519
00:20:17,680 --> 00:20:19,046
but I hope they're in there
making honey."
520
00:20:19,071 --> 00:20:21,723
I need them to work and focus.
I'm taking new investors.
521
00:20:21,758 --> 00:20:23,392
Afterwards, just find me.
522
00:20:23,426 --> 00:20:25,359
I am strongly opposed
523
00:20:25,384 --> 00:20:27,880
to these new
energy-efficient streetlights.
524
00:20:27,905 --> 00:20:28,998
You know what?
525
00:20:29,023 --> 00:20:30,666
Actually, I don't even care
about the streetlights.
526
00:20:30,700 --> 00:20:31,834
I don't even live here.
527
00:20:31,868 --> 00:20:33,936
I just go to these town halls
to get out of the house.
528
00:20:33,970 --> 00:20:35,237
I love my husband.
529
00:20:35,271 --> 00:20:36,538
I love his cooking.
530
00:20:36,573 --> 00:20:38,874
He's a wonderful father to our birds,
531
00:20:38,900 --> 00:20:41,910
but the music, it's just constant.
I don't get it.
532
00:20:41,935 --> 00:20:44,711
Everything, whoa, all the time.
I mean, what's the point?
533
00:20:44,736 --> 00:20:45,769
Why not just say it?
534
00:20:45,794 --> 00:20:47,972
It seems easier and less stressful.
535
00:20:47,997 --> 00:20:49,050
I mean, music is dumb, right?
536
00:20:49,075 --> 00:20:51,110
Do you know his last name's
not even Legend?
537
00:20:51,154 --> 00:20:53,288
It's McGruff, like the crime dog.
538
00:20:53,323 --> 00:20:56,258
Anyway, anyone wanna go play
paintball or something?
539
00:20:56,283 --> 00:20:58,494
I have a car, so I can drive us.
540
00:20:58,528 --> 00:21:00,736
All right. Okay.
Go to hell, Culver City.
541
00:21:02,048 --> 00:21:07,048
Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx
www.addic7ed.com
39585
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