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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,256 --> 00:00:05,051 Previously on "Future Man"... 2 00:00:05,052 --> 00:00:06,375 My name is Athena. 3 00:00:06,400 --> 00:00:08,474 My comrades and I traveled back in time to find you. 4 00:00:08,475 --> 00:00:10,562 Everything that happens in the Biotic Wars is real. 5 00:00:10,563 --> 00:00:12,106 The Biotics, the wars. 6 00:00:12,107 --> 00:00:13,985 The Tiger I know didn't stand down. 7 00:00:13,986 --> 00:00:16,448 That was before a whole unit died because of me. 8 00:00:16,449 --> 00:00:18,202 I lost everyone to get here. 9 00:00:18,203 --> 00:00:21,166 - Gosh, darn it! - Jeepers creepers. 10 00:00:21,167 --> 00:00:23,630 Those bags, so rascally. I never trust 'em. 11 00:00:23,631 --> 00:00:25,759 I don't know how to thank you for this, Ty-Anne. 12 00:00:25,760 --> 00:00:27,638 I haven't had a home-cooked meal since, 13 00:00:27,639 --> 00:00:29,307 well, I lived at home with my mom. 14 00:00:29,308 --> 00:00:31,353 Oh, you hush now, Stu-bear. 15 00:00:31,354 --> 00:00:34,109 Goodnight, you sweet, sad little man. 16 00:00:34,110 --> 00:00:35,988 How do we separate Biotics from humans? 17 00:00:35,989 --> 00:00:37,908 This place is thick with sewer mushrooms. 18 00:00:37,909 --> 00:00:39,327 Couple of seconds after eating those, 19 00:00:39,328 --> 00:00:40,956 you puke, shit yourself, and pass out 20 00:00:40,957 --> 00:00:42,083 with no memory of what happened. 21 00:00:42,084 --> 00:00:43,670 Except for Biotics. 22 00:00:43,671 --> 00:00:45,214 They're immune to all poison, 23 00:00:45,215 --> 00:00:47,845 so they'll be the only ones left standing. 24 00:00:47,846 --> 00:00:50,182 How? 25 00:00:55,360 --> 00:01:00,764 Oh, shiiit! 26 00:01:04,879 --> 00:01:06,591 Breathe, God damn it. 27 00:01:06,592 --> 00:01:10,599 How did we... 28 00:01:13,104 --> 00:01:15,984 Get out of there? 29 00:01:17,196 --> 00:01:18,782 It's such a mind-fuck. 30 00:01:23,751 --> 00:01:26,171 2162. 31 00:01:26,172 --> 00:01:28,885 We made it. 32 00:01:28,886 --> 00:01:31,014 "This reflecting pool 33 00:01:31,015 --> 00:01:32,768 "commemorates the innocent lives 34 00:01:32,769 --> 00:01:36,108 "lost in the horrific Kronish Tower 35 00:01:36,109 --> 00:01:37,903 Terrorist Attack." 36 00:01:37,904 --> 00:01:39,573 Oh, my God. 37 00:01:39,574 --> 00:01:41,828 - We fucking did it. - We did. 38 00:01:41,829 --> 00:01:43,205 We did it! 39 00:01:43,206 --> 00:01:45,251 Oh, Tiger, we did it! 40 00:01:45,252 --> 00:01:47,004 Yay! 41 00:01:50,095 --> 00:01:51,471 - Yeah! - Whoo! 42 00:01:51,472 --> 00:01:53,267 Whoo! 43 00:01:53,268 --> 00:01:55,772 - Whoo! - Ah! 44 00:01:55,773 --> 00:01:57,150 So long, Biotics. 45 00:01:57,151 --> 00:01:59,487 You exist on a plaque now. 46 00:01:59,488 --> 00:02:01,491 That's what's left of your filthy kind. 47 00:02:01,492 --> 00:02:03,203 Yeah. 48 00:02:03,204 --> 00:02:04,498 That's right. 49 00:02:05,877 --> 00:02:08,214 Not a... not a single one left. 50 00:02:09,049 --> 00:02:11,555 So we can probably never talk about it again. 51 00:02:12,891 --> 00:02:15,729 - That little guy did it. - Yeah. 52 00:02:15,730 --> 00:02:18,400 His name should be on that plaque. 53 00:02:18,401 --> 00:02:20,572 Not those fucking Perfs. 54 00:02:20,573 --> 00:02:22,325 That's the best and easy fix. 55 00:02:30,760 --> 00:02:33,515 - There we go. Yeah. - Yeah. 56 00:02:33,516 --> 00:02:35,142 I guess we should say something. 57 00:02:35,143 --> 00:02:36,562 Yeah, I mean he died for the cause. 58 00:02:36,563 --> 00:02:37,940 We should probably say a few words. 59 00:02:37,941 --> 00:02:39,985 - Yeah. - How do you 60 00:02:39,986 --> 00:02:43,450 eulogize a man like Josh? 61 00:02:49,296 --> 00:02:50,966 - Oh, you're really asking... - Yeah, yeah, yeah. 62 00:02:50,967 --> 00:02:52,719 Public speaking's not really my... 63 00:02:52,720 --> 00:02:54,932 It doesn't have to be a formal thing. 64 00:02:54,933 --> 00:02:56,769 No, no, no. We'll just keep it casual. 65 00:02:56,770 --> 00:02:58,648 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 66 00:02:58,649 --> 00:03:00,276 - Okay, so... - So... 67 00:03:00,277 --> 00:03:03,616 He, uh, made a lot of kills. 68 00:03:03,617 --> 00:03:05,286 And look at those names. 69 00:03:05,287 --> 00:03:08,626 I mean, I did a good portion of them, but it... 70 00:03:08,627 --> 00:03:10,964 You have anything you wanna add or? 71 00:03:10,965 --> 00:03:14,012 Though his worldly body was incinerated 72 00:03:14,013 --> 00:03:16,851 and turned to ash, I take comfort in knowing 73 00:03:16,852 --> 00:03:19,355 that it has become one with the elements, 74 00:03:19,356 --> 00:03:22,278 aerating the soil 75 00:03:22,279 --> 00:03:25,535 and the earth that we walk upon, 76 00:03:25,536 --> 00:03:28,917 blowing in the wind and the air that we breathe. 77 00:03:33,259 --> 00:03:35,805 Except for his cock. That's still kicking around, 78 00:03:35,806 --> 00:03:37,266 - huh? - Yep. 79 00:03:37,267 --> 00:03:39,479 The living embodiment of Josh hangs off me 80 00:03:39,480 --> 00:03:41,901 like a medal of honor. 81 00:03:41,902 --> 00:03:44,322 Though it was once a cause of great shame, 82 00:03:44,323 --> 00:03:47,621 I will wear it with pride for the rest of my days. 83 00:03:47,622 --> 00:03:50,919 Like him, it's small, but efficient. 84 00:03:50,920 --> 00:03:52,964 It packs the occasional wallop. 85 00:03:55,011 --> 00:03:57,014 Not as big of a wallop as my original rod. 86 00:03:57,015 --> 00:04:00,062 - Ah, yeah okay. - But this one's adequate. 87 00:04:02,275 --> 00:04:04,195 - Just like Josh. - Mm-hmm. 88 00:04:04,196 --> 00:04:06,826 And when I hold it in my hand it will be 89 00:04:06,827 --> 00:04:09,623 like I'm holding his hand across timelines. 90 00:04:09,624 --> 00:04:12,378 Okay, all right. All right, I think we're good. 91 00:04:12,379 --> 00:04:14,800 - I think we covered it. - Oh, yeah, sure. 92 00:04:14,801 --> 00:04:19,350 Only sounded like a eulogy for your incinerated cock. 93 00:04:19,351 --> 00:04:21,479 - You okay? - Yeah, I'm fine. 94 00:04:21,480 --> 00:04:23,860 I'm just... ah, how about you? 95 00:04:23,861 --> 00:04:25,613 Nah, I'm good. I mean, a millimeter to the right 96 00:04:25,614 --> 00:04:27,116 probably would have hit my heart over here. 97 00:04:27,117 --> 00:04:29,329 - Oh, yeah, close call. - Yeah. 98 00:04:30,165 --> 00:04:34,130 Well, let's see how we fit into this brave, new world, huh? 99 00:04:35,843 --> 00:04:37,888 I like what I'm seeing so far. 100 00:04:37,889 --> 00:04:43,652 Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx www. addic7ed. com 101 00:04:50,371 --> 00:04:52,416 A little hotter than our 2162, 102 00:04:52,417 --> 00:04:54,087 - but I could get used to this. - Yeah. 103 00:04:54,088 --> 00:04:56,382 Reminds me of all those schvitzes I took 104 00:04:56,383 --> 00:04:58,513 with some pretty powerful Hollywood Jews. 105 00:04:58,514 --> 00:05:00,182 - Mm-hmm. - That's where all the real 106 00:05:00,183 --> 00:05:01,852 - deals got made. - Mm-hmm. 107 00:05:01,853 --> 00:05:04,775 And some lasting friendships. 108 00:05:04,776 --> 00:05:07,196 So me, Bob Evans, Lou Wasserman... 109 00:05:07,197 --> 00:05:10,369 Okay, okay, we're closing in on something. 110 00:05:10,370 --> 00:05:12,874 Oh. No. 111 00:05:12,875 --> 00:05:14,545 No. 112 00:05:14,546 --> 00:05:17,509 It's the Three Strung Corpses of Alamore. 113 00:05:17,510 --> 00:05:19,555 It's the Death Fields. 114 00:05:19,556 --> 00:05:21,474 I thought we changed things. 115 00:05:21,475 --> 00:05:23,939 Oh. Oh, God. 116 00:05:28,866 --> 00:05:31,662 Wait, those aren't corpses. 117 00:05:31,663 --> 00:05:33,749 They're Frighten-Birds. 118 00:05:33,750 --> 00:05:36,296 If there's Frighten-Birds, there must be... 119 00:05:36,297 --> 00:05:38,091 Outdoor food! 120 00:05:47,194 --> 00:05:49,114 It's a... 121 00:05:50,576 --> 00:05:52,537 It's a bean. 122 00:05:52,538 --> 00:05:55,501 And what a bean. 123 00:05:55,502 --> 00:05:58,299 Have we created the land of giants? 124 00:05:59,594 --> 00:06:00,971 Oh. 125 00:06:02,642 --> 00:06:05,187 Oh. 126 00:06:05,188 --> 00:06:08,653 Oh, I'm sensing hints of lima. 127 00:06:11,785 --> 00:06:13,537 And pinto. 128 00:06:13,538 --> 00:06:15,959 Kidney. 129 00:06:15,960 --> 00:06:19,048 Black-eyed. And navy. 130 00:06:19,049 --> 00:06:20,760 Navy. 131 00:06:20,761 --> 00:06:23,306 This is like all beans rolled into one. 132 00:06:23,307 --> 00:06:25,812 Like some kind of a... 133 00:06:25,813 --> 00:06:28,358 mega-bean. 134 00:06:28,359 --> 00:06:31,740 From the death fields to the bean fields. 135 00:06:31,741 --> 00:06:33,536 What a magical world. 136 00:06:40,216 --> 00:06:44,056 Wolf, Younglings. 137 00:06:44,057 --> 00:06:45,560 Fresh and undead! 138 00:06:47,188 --> 00:06:50,528 Wolf, I think they want to play Hunter v. Hunted. 139 00:06:50,529 --> 00:06:53,324 Wolf. 140 00:06:53,325 --> 00:06:54,494 Wolf. 141 00:07:02,427 --> 00:07:06,100 Strays in the All-Bean field! Strays in the All-Bean field! 142 00:07:06,101 --> 00:07:07,854 Strays in the All-Bean field! 143 00:07:07,855 --> 00:07:09,649 Strays in the All-Bean field! 144 00:07:17,248 --> 00:07:19,544 That's no stray. That's Torque! 145 00:07:19,545 --> 00:07:21,757 He's got two GX239 hand cannon wounds. 146 00:07:21,758 --> 00:07:24,971 Shoulder, thigh, and I'm hit upper abdomen. 147 00:07:28,647 --> 00:07:32,570 - Weasel. Is that you? - Who are you calling weasel? 148 00:07:32,571 --> 00:07:35,242 - 'Cause that's your name. - My name is Wrench. 149 00:07:35,243 --> 00:07:37,329 And there's no outsiders allowed in the NAG. 150 00:07:37,330 --> 00:07:39,709 It's Tiger. I'm with Wolf. 151 00:07:39,710 --> 00:07:42,632 That's Torque. I know him. 152 00:07:42,633 --> 00:07:45,555 I don't know you. Maybe you're helping him. 153 00:07:45,556 --> 00:07:47,809 Or maybe you're the one that gave him those injuries. 154 00:07:47,810 --> 00:07:51,357 Trying to use him for cover. Sneak in, poach our beans. 155 00:07:51,358 --> 00:07:53,571 - That your game? - Is she Bio-Tech? 156 00:07:53,572 --> 00:07:54,823 She sure smells like one. 157 00:07:54,824 --> 00:07:56,159 We'll know for sure after she takes 158 00:07:56,160 --> 00:07:58,121 the sewer-mushroom test. 159 00:07:58,122 --> 00:08:02,797 Your pants make brown, welcome to our town. 160 00:08:02,798 --> 00:08:05,386 Your pants stay dry... 161 00:08:07,098 --> 00:08:09,519 You're gonna die. 162 00:08:09,520 --> 00:08:12,692 Anvil! Go get the Bio-Tester. 163 00:08:19,206 --> 00:08:21,710 - Hey, you're back. - Huh? What? 164 00:08:21,711 --> 00:08:23,254 - You're home. - What? 165 00:08:23,255 --> 00:08:25,175 Come on. 166 00:08:25,176 --> 00:08:27,765 - Let's get you some help. - Huh? What? 167 00:09:32,101 --> 00:09:34,480 If we succeed, we go back to the future, 168 00:09:34,481 --> 00:09:37,361 the Biotics don't exist, and our team is still alive. 169 00:09:37,362 --> 00:09:39,490 That's different people who don't know us 170 00:09:39,491 --> 00:09:41,870 - or what we did. - But I'll know. 171 00:09:41,871 --> 00:09:45,586 And you'll know. And we'll have each other. 172 00:09:45,587 --> 00:09:47,255 I've given you my life 173 00:09:47,256 --> 00:09:48,760 because I trust you. 174 00:09:49,929 --> 00:09:51,765 It was all worth it to get you back. 175 00:09:51,766 --> 00:09:54,228 You're the only family I need. 176 00:09:54,229 --> 00:09:57,109 You and your mutant race deserve to die! 177 00:10:08,675 --> 00:10:10,636 Come! 178 00:10:10,637 --> 00:10:13,560 Come! C-come! 179 00:10:15,605 --> 00:10:18,192 Come! 180 00:10:18,193 --> 00:10:22,117 C-come! Come! 181 00:10:22,118 --> 00:10:24,037 Out with you, boy! 182 00:10:24,038 --> 00:10:25,917 C-come! 183 00:10:27,336 --> 00:10:30,008 Come! 184 00:10:30,009 --> 00:10:32,179 - Come! - Reveal yourself! 185 00:10:32,180 --> 00:10:34,391 Devil child! 186 00:10:34,392 --> 00:10:36,354 C-come! 187 00:10:37,733 --> 00:10:39,778 Come! 188 00:10:39,779 --> 00:10:41,197 Come one, come all 189 00:10:41,198 --> 00:10:43,075 to the great red planet MARS! 190 00:10:43,076 --> 00:10:44,913 Yep, it's me: Lil Jimmy McGurgan. 191 00:10:44,914 --> 00:10:46,165 Earth is dying. 192 00:10:46,166 --> 00:10:47,543 Lucky for us, 193 00:10:47,544 --> 00:10:49,463 the solar system gave us a spare planet 194 00:10:49,464 --> 00:10:52,678 right next door, and I'm gonna be the first boy on MARS: 195 00:10:52,679 --> 00:10:54,641 - What? - But before I get there, 196 00:10:54,642 --> 00:10:56,477 we've all got some training to do. 197 00:10:56,478 --> 00:10:59,734 Mons hab units are open now, no Ethereum down! 198 00:10:59,735 --> 00:11:02,990 Come! Come one, come all to the great red planet MARS: 199 00:11:02,991 --> 00:11:05,161 Yep, it's me: Lil Jimmy McGurgan. 200 00:11:05,162 --> 00:11:06,455 Earth is dying. 201 00:11:06,456 --> 00:11:08,042 Lucky for us, the solar system 202 00:11:08,043 --> 00:11:09,461 gave us a spare planet 203 00:11:09,462 --> 00:11:10,798 right next door... 204 00:11:35,557 --> 00:11:37,100 You. Moon man. 205 00:11:37,101 --> 00:11:39,523 What the fuck's going on here? 206 00:11:55,889 --> 00:11:58,184 Hello and welcome to the Mons. 207 00:11:58,185 --> 00:12:00,396 I'm your automated guide Cassini. 208 00:12:00,397 --> 00:12:02,233 How may I be of service? 209 00:12:02,234 --> 00:12:04,989 I want answers, Cassini, and I want them now. 210 00:12:04,990 --> 00:12:07,243 Okeydokey, what kind of answers? 211 00:12:07,244 --> 00:12:08,830 Commonly asked questions include: 212 00:12:08,831 --> 00:12:10,751 what does it smell like on MARS? 213 00:12:10,752 --> 00:12:12,505 Is it hot or cold on MARS? 214 00:12:12,506 --> 00:12:14,466 Will I need a jacket on MARS? 215 00:12:14,467 --> 00:12:16,721 - And are there Martians on MARS? - Okay. 216 00:12:16,722 --> 00:12:20,646 Were all these people in these bubble huts Bio-Techs? 217 00:12:20,647 --> 00:12:23,109 Oopsie. Hate speech is a no-no. 218 00:12:23,110 --> 00:12:26,866 Please restate your question using the term "human beings." 219 00:12:26,867 --> 00:12:30,456 Okay, are these human beings, were they given a super-cure 220 00:12:30,457 --> 00:12:32,712 - for all diseases? - You betcha. 221 00:12:32,713 --> 00:12:34,549 Their ancestors were given the cure 222 00:12:34,550 --> 00:12:37,345 - more than 100 years ago. - Fuck me. 223 00:12:37,346 --> 00:12:39,600 I personally cannot perform that service, 224 00:12:39,601 --> 00:12:42,188 but here are some local establishments that can. 225 00:12:42,189 --> 00:12:44,944 The Rub Hub, The "O" -Zone, Spunknik. 226 00:12:44,945 --> 00:12:46,114 Okay. 227 00:12:47,617 --> 00:12:49,369 Was there a war because the government 228 00:12:49,370 --> 00:12:51,958 forced a super-cure on an unwilling populace? 229 00:12:51,959 --> 00:12:54,004 - No. - Oh, thank God. 230 00:12:54,005 --> 00:12:55,799 There was a war because the government 231 00:12:55,800 --> 00:12:57,970 withheld the cure from a large portion 232 00:12:57,971 --> 00:13:00,141 of a desperate and dying populace, 233 00:13:00,142 --> 00:13:03,022 kicking off 100 years of global bloodshed, 234 00:13:03,023 --> 00:13:05,903 the likes of which our planet has never seen. 235 00:13:05,904 --> 00:13:07,322 No, I can't believe this. 236 00:13:07,323 --> 00:13:09,577 Retrieving visual proof. 237 00:13:09,578 --> 00:13:12,082 I've curated the most disturbing images 238 00:13:12,083 --> 00:13:14,461 to convey maximum emotional impact, 239 00:13:14,462 --> 00:13:17,927 forgoing a traditional narrative form of storytelling. 240 00:13:17,928 --> 00:13:20,599 Does it help if I go faster? 241 00:13:20,600 --> 00:13:23,437 Stop. Stop. Cassini, stop! 242 00:13:23,438 --> 00:13:25,943 The next thing out of your squawk box 243 00:13:25,944 --> 00:13:28,990 better be some good news about the last 100 years. 244 00:13:28,991 --> 00:13:30,284 How about this? 245 00:13:30,285 --> 00:13:32,748 Thanks to the Armistice of 2142, 246 00:13:32,749 --> 00:13:35,671 humanity has enjoyed 20 years of lasting peace. 247 00:13:35,672 --> 00:13:37,925 Yeah, yeah, tell me more about these peace accords. 248 00:13:37,926 --> 00:13:40,263 The Peace Accord Bombings of 2094 249 00:13:40,264 --> 00:13:41,891 devastated Western Europe. 250 00:13:41,892 --> 00:13:45,481 Does that sound like good news to you, Cassini! 251 00:13:45,482 --> 00:13:47,318 Ma'am? Ma'am! 252 00:13:47,319 --> 00:13:48,864 You are currently breaking 253 00:13:48,865 --> 00:13:52,078 the Violence Against Machines Act of 2139. 254 00:13:52,079 --> 00:13:54,709 Yeah, I'm gonna break a lot more than that 255 00:13:54,710 --> 00:13:56,588 you fucking Dork-a-tron! 256 00:13:56,589 --> 00:13:59,384 I am computer code and cannot be physically harmed. 257 00:13:59,385 --> 00:14:01,388 You appear to be injured. 258 00:14:01,389 --> 00:14:05,104 Your current rate of blood loss is 9.6 milliliters per minute. 259 00:14:05,105 --> 00:14:07,860 I advise you to seek medical attention. 260 00:14:07,861 --> 00:14:10,657 Oh, uh, have a wonderful day. 261 00:14:33,955 --> 00:14:36,291 What the fuck is this shit? 262 00:14:43,431 --> 00:14:46,437 Fuck! 263 00:14:50,487 --> 00:14:51,907 Well... no. 264 00:15:20,882 --> 00:15:23,762 Uh, is Tony in? I was hoping to have this clean 265 00:15:23,763 --> 00:15:25,683 by Mon... day. 266 00:15:28,480 --> 00:15:29,815 You do know there's an infirmary 267 00:15:29,816 --> 00:15:31,318 two quads up, three over? 268 00:15:53,488 --> 00:15:57,036 Two quads up, three over. Okay. 269 00:16:28,057 --> 00:16:30,645 - Where'd she go? - She's right here. 270 00:16:39,205 --> 00:16:41,291 Now you found me, what do you want? 271 00:16:41,292 --> 00:16:43,504 To invite you. 272 00:16:43,505 --> 00:16:45,174 Up there. 273 00:17:08,638 --> 00:17:10,267 Oh, come on. 274 00:17:14,776 --> 00:17:16,111 I can't believe it. 275 00:17:16,112 --> 00:17:17,905 You're here. 276 00:17:17,906 --> 00:17:20,537 Oh, you're hurt. Doctor Hogeveen! 277 00:17:20,538 --> 00:17:23,458 - How are you here? - How are you here? 278 00:17:23,459 --> 00:17:26,088 It's been 144 years, 7 months, and 3 days 279 00:17:26,089 --> 00:17:27,925 since that magical... 280 00:17:27,926 --> 00:17:30,222 since we met. 281 00:17:30,223 --> 00:17:31,601 You haven't aged a day. 282 00:17:31,602 --> 00:17:33,521 Yeah, I've aged a day. 283 00:17:33,522 --> 00:17:36,443 - One really shitty day. - Eunice, please, she's hurt. 284 00:17:36,444 --> 00:17:38,113 One day? 285 00:17:38,114 --> 00:17:40,034 How is that possible? 286 00:17:40,035 --> 00:17:43,332 - Time travel. - But that doesn't exist. 287 00:17:43,333 --> 00:17:45,879 Well obviously it exists because I'm here in your... 288 00:17:45,880 --> 00:17:48,383 what do you call this? Mountain lair? 289 00:17:48,384 --> 00:17:50,847 You freeze yourself? You're a cryo-slag now? 290 00:17:50,848 --> 00:17:52,559 This is a miracle. It's... 291 00:17:52,560 --> 00:17:54,354 This is happiness I don't deserve. 292 00:17:54,355 --> 00:17:56,066 - A bolt of joy. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. 293 00:17:56,067 --> 00:17:58,696 - How did Kronish's cure get out? - Kronish? 294 00:17:58,697 --> 00:18:02,411 - His work died with him. - What... ow! 295 00:18:02,412 --> 00:18:04,248 These wounds. It would help if I could see 296 00:18:04,249 --> 00:18:06,252 - the weapon that caused them. - Yeah, we'll just pop back 297 00:18:06,253 --> 00:18:09,677 140 years and take them off the chucklefucks who shot me. 298 00:18:09,678 --> 00:18:11,137 Who developed the cure? 299 00:18:11,138 --> 00:18:13,935 Ah, you know, I don't like to 300 00:18:13,936 --> 00:18:17,149 toot my own kazoo, but it was me. 301 00:18:17,150 --> 00:18:18,528 It was my life's work. 302 00:18:18,529 --> 00:18:20,489 Why would you do that? 303 00:18:20,490 --> 00:18:22,828 Because tens of millions of people were dying 304 00:18:22,829 --> 00:18:24,205 and I wanted to save them. 305 00:18:24,206 --> 00:18:26,669 You monster! Ah! 306 00:18:26,670 --> 00:18:30,678 - Fuck! What? - Get it out of your system. 307 00:18:33,474 --> 00:18:35,562 Reveal yourself. 308 00:18:35,563 --> 00:18:37,356 - I'm not hiding. - Come on! 309 00:18:37,357 --> 00:18:39,110 - Is this a joke? - This is me. 310 00:18:39,111 --> 00:18:40,613 I'm a hologram. 311 00:18:40,614 --> 00:18:42,826 It's true. He is a hologram. 312 00:18:42,827 --> 00:18:44,913 I appreciate you keeping an open mind. 313 00:18:44,914 --> 00:18:47,334 What kind of sick fucking techno nightmare 314 00:18:47,335 --> 00:18:49,380 did I just wake up in? 315 00:18:49,381 --> 00:18:51,427 Eunice, can you please give us a moment? 316 00:18:53,599 --> 00:18:55,059 Look, I... 317 00:18:56,813 --> 00:19:01,655 I know this is a lot to take in, but, um, I'm an AIS, 318 00:19:01,656 --> 00:19:03,283 an Augmented Intelligence System. 319 00:19:03,284 --> 00:19:05,580 I uploaded my brain, my memories. 320 00:19:05,581 --> 00:19:07,082 Everything about me still exists. 321 00:19:07,083 --> 00:19:08,961 I just don't have a body. 322 00:19:08,962 --> 00:19:10,465 So you're a robo-ghost. 323 00:19:12,804 --> 00:19:15,307 Will you excuse me one second? 324 00:19:15,308 --> 00:19:16,351 Fuck. 325 00:19:16,352 --> 00:19:17,813 Oh, that was a disaster. 326 00:19:17,814 --> 00:19:19,398 You're catastrophizing. 327 00:19:19,399 --> 00:19:21,444 - She hates me. - She doesn't hate you. 328 00:19:21,445 --> 00:19:23,991 I waited 144 years 329 00:19:23,992 --> 00:19:25,578 for the only woman I've ever loved 330 00:19:25,579 --> 00:19:26,956 to come walking through the door 331 00:19:26,957 --> 00:19:29,878 and I immediately blow it. 332 00:19:29,879 --> 00:19:32,216 Why couldn't I have programmed myself to be cool? 333 00:19:32,217 --> 00:19:34,178 Stu, take a deep breath. 334 00:19:38,229 --> 00:19:40,357 She probably blames me for the war. 335 00:19:40,358 --> 00:19:41,777 But I wasn't the one who decided 336 00:19:41,778 --> 00:19:42,863 who got the cure and who didn't. 337 00:19:42,864 --> 00:19:44,198 It was those bastards 338 00:19:44,199 --> 00:19:45,577 at the World Health Organization. 339 00:19:45,578 --> 00:19:47,789 And history reviles them for it. 340 00:19:47,790 --> 00:19:51,087 I have dedicated my life to healing humanity. 341 00:19:51,088 --> 00:19:54,218 I extended my life so that I could continue trying. 342 00:19:54,219 --> 00:19:56,014 If only there was a way I could program 343 00:19:56,015 --> 00:19:58,226 - that information into her. - There is. 344 00:19:58,227 --> 00:19:59,688 It's called "telling her." 345 00:19:59,689 --> 00:20:02,819 Use your words, Stu. 346 00:20:02,820 --> 00:20:04,280 I'll probably just mess it up. 347 00:20:04,281 --> 00:20:06,451 Try considering how she feels. 348 00:20:06,452 --> 00:20:07,787 With your computing power, 349 00:20:07,788 --> 00:20:09,958 you've had 16 quadrillion lifetimes 350 00:20:09,959 --> 00:20:11,754 to process these feelings. 351 00:20:11,755 --> 00:20:13,674 She's had 12 minutes. 352 00:20:13,675 --> 00:20:15,469 Yeah. 353 00:20:15,470 --> 00:20:17,432 You're right. Just... 354 00:20:18,810 --> 00:20:20,145 It's Ty-Anne. 355 00:20:20,146 --> 00:20:22,817 - It's the real Ty-Anne. - I know. 356 00:20:22,818 --> 00:20:25,197 - I don't want to blow it. - Stu. 357 00:20:25,198 --> 00:20:28,328 You're not just a person. You're a good person. 358 00:20:28,329 --> 00:20:31,961 - No, no. - Stuart, look at me. 359 00:20:31,962 --> 00:20:34,465 You're a person. 360 00:20:38,057 --> 00:20:39,392 Do you need a hug? 361 00:20:39,393 --> 00:20:41,229 Yeah. 362 00:20:41,230 --> 00:20:44,569 Can you be the bunny? 363 00:20:44,570 --> 00:20:46,447 We're inside your operating system. 364 00:20:46,448 --> 00:20:48,285 I can be whatever you want. 365 00:20:52,335 --> 00:20:54,965 There you go. There you go. 366 00:20:54,966 --> 00:20:57,011 Settle into that fur. 367 00:20:57,012 --> 00:20:58,639 Where were we? 368 00:20:58,640 --> 00:21:01,603 You were blabbing about being a computer zombie. 369 00:21:01,604 --> 00:21:03,816 Your feelings are understandable 370 00:21:03,817 --> 00:21:05,778 and valid, Ty-Anne. 371 00:21:05,779 --> 00:21:09,326 Ty-Anne? Ah, right, yeah. I was at your house yesterday. 372 00:21:09,327 --> 00:21:12,792 Well, no, I'm Tiger, and I'm from the year 2162. 373 00:21:12,793 --> 00:21:14,838 But not this bullshit version. 374 00:21:14,839 --> 00:21:16,257 The version where I was sent back 375 00:21:16,258 --> 00:21:18,219 to stop the cure from ever getting out. 376 00:21:18,220 --> 00:21:20,182 You were just a mark for my mission 377 00:21:20,183 --> 00:21:22,979 to blow up the Kronitorium and destroy all Kronish's research. 378 00:21:22,980 --> 00:21:25,651 What are you talking about? You didn't blow up the lab. 379 00:21:25,652 --> 00:21:27,446 That was the Krona-bomber. 380 00:21:27,447 --> 00:21:28,742 Joosh Futturman. 381 00:21:30,119 --> 00:21:31,872 Little Boy Blew. 382 00:21:31,873 --> 00:21:34,586 - Yeah, he was with us. - You were working with him? 383 00:21:34,587 --> 00:21:36,548 He was a cold-blooded killer. 384 00:21:36,549 --> 00:21:38,803 He was remorseless during the trial. 385 00:21:38,804 --> 00:21:41,057 This... this does not compute. 386 00:21:41,058 --> 00:21:42,977 Yeah, you know what else doesn't compute? 387 00:21:42,978 --> 00:21:45,357 The world I come from, we were in the midst of a 30-year war. 388 00:21:45,358 --> 00:21:48,029 Now, thanks to you, we're up to 100. 389 00:21:48,030 --> 00:21:51,703 It's 114, actually. We round down for morale. 390 00:21:51,704 --> 00:21:55,418 Do you understand now why you being the father of the cure 391 00:21:55,419 --> 00:21:57,924 is not exactly the bee's knees. 392 00:21:57,925 --> 00:21:59,886 Oh, boy. This next part... 393 00:21:59,887 --> 00:22:03,853 Look, I want you to trust me, and, uh, 394 00:22:03,854 --> 00:22:06,274 the foundation to any healthy relationship is honesty. 395 00:22:06,275 --> 00:22:08,194 - So... - Out with it, phantom! 396 00:22:08,195 --> 00:22:10,031 When you stab me, it doesn't hurt me physically, 397 00:22:10,032 --> 00:22:11,910 - but it does hurt my heart. - Oh, that just makes me wanna 398 00:22:11,911 --> 00:22:14,373 - to stab you more. - Okay, if... 399 00:22:14,374 --> 00:22:16,294 If I'm the father of the cure, 400 00:22:16,295 --> 00:22:19,342 then you're kinda the mom. 401 00:22:20,888 --> 00:22:22,807 What! 402 00:22:22,808 --> 00:22:24,978 When you saved my life 403 00:22:24,979 --> 00:22:27,191 by leaving me that note, I wanted to thank you, 404 00:22:27,192 --> 00:22:28,611 but you vanished. 405 00:22:28,612 --> 00:22:29,905 I had no way to get in contact with you. 406 00:22:29,906 --> 00:22:32,159 - Watch out! - Fuck. 407 00:22:32,160 --> 00:22:33,954 Then I remembered that I'm a scientist, 408 00:22:33,955 --> 00:22:36,375 so I could find you using something that you left behind. 409 00:22:36,376 --> 00:22:37,671 Like what? 410 00:22:39,842 --> 00:22:41,511 The genomic structure of your DNA 411 00:22:41,512 --> 00:22:43,348 was like nothing I'd ever seen. 412 00:22:45,562 --> 00:22:47,022 No, that's a hologram too. 413 00:22:47,023 --> 00:22:48,525 The original was purchased by Elon Musk 414 00:22:48,526 --> 00:22:51,782 in a competitive bidding situation. 415 00:22:51,783 --> 00:22:55,372 You used my Biotic DNA to create the cure? 416 00:22:55,373 --> 00:22:57,209 I thought you were an angel from heaven. 417 00:22:57,210 --> 00:22:58,796 I thought that this was my life's purpose, 418 00:22:58,797 --> 00:23:01,008 to use this to heal the world. 419 00:23:01,009 --> 00:23:03,429 To save humanity, the way you saved me. 420 00:23:05,519 --> 00:23:08,481 No, no, no, that's... 421 00:23:08,482 --> 00:23:10,443 Hologram. I'm so sorry. 422 00:23:10,444 --> 00:23:12,783 That was the worst time for that to happen. 423 00:23:34,702 --> 00:23:36,495 - No, I get it. - Oh, son of a... 424 00:23:36,496 --> 00:23:38,709 I get it. You hate me. 425 00:23:38,710 --> 00:23:40,170 No, I don't. 426 00:23:40,171 --> 00:23:42,675 This isn't your fault, okay? It's mine. 427 00:23:42,676 --> 00:23:44,971 I'm the one who left behind body-relics, 428 00:23:44,972 --> 00:23:48,269 and that mistake... made it so I destroyed humanity. 429 00:23:48,270 --> 00:23:50,357 No, you saved it. 430 00:23:50,358 --> 00:23:53,071 None of these people would be alive if it wasn't for you. 431 00:23:53,072 --> 00:23:55,743 If you hadn't left behind those body-relics, 432 00:23:55,744 --> 00:23:58,540 humanity would have gone the way of the bees. 433 00:23:58,541 --> 00:24:01,880 And the bats. All animals, really. 434 00:24:01,881 --> 00:24:03,842 Oh, great. Well I saved the doofus brigade. 435 00:24:03,843 --> 00:24:06,263 Just in time for the planet to die. Super proud. 436 00:24:06,264 --> 00:24:08,184 But we are not gonna die with it. 437 00:24:08,185 --> 00:24:09,687 Look, all these people are not 438 00:24:09,688 --> 00:24:11,315 worrying about the end of the world. 439 00:24:11,316 --> 00:24:13,236 They're looking forward to starting a new one. 440 00:24:13,237 --> 00:24:16,283 Hey, Jimmy! You excited about the MARS launch? 441 00:24:16,284 --> 00:24:17,912 You bet, Stu. Check out my new suit. 442 00:24:17,913 --> 00:24:19,916 First boy on MARS! 443 00:24:19,917 --> 00:24:21,628 No one can take that away from you. 444 00:24:23,257 --> 00:24:25,093 Really wish I could take that away from him, 445 00:24:25,094 --> 00:24:27,891 but the rules of the radio call-in contest were clear. 446 00:24:35,991 --> 00:24:37,578 This changes everything. 447 00:24:38,746 --> 00:24:41,543 For the first time, humanity is working together 448 00:24:41,544 --> 00:24:43,755 - in pursuit of a single goal. - Does that include 449 00:24:43,756 --> 00:24:45,968 the spear-wielding man-mountain over at the NAG? 450 00:24:45,969 --> 00:24:48,306 'Cause his goal seemed to be to make me shit myself. 451 00:24:48,307 --> 00:24:51,020 The good people of the NAG are invited to MARS: 452 00:24:51,021 --> 00:24:52,940 I've reached out to them countless times. 453 00:24:52,941 --> 00:24:56,573 But they're so anti-tech. They don't trust me. 454 00:24:56,574 --> 00:24:58,911 When I finally made enough cure, I sent it to them. 455 00:24:58,912 --> 00:25:00,873 They smashed it with rocks. 456 00:25:00,874 --> 00:25:04,129 When puppies went extinct, I sent them PUP-E: 457 00:25:04,130 --> 00:25:07,177 an adorable robo-dog. They smashed them with rocks. 458 00:25:07,178 --> 00:25:08,680 I can't blame them on that one. 459 00:25:08,681 --> 00:25:10,433 I mean, you replaced a stable food source 460 00:25:10,434 --> 00:25:12,479 with an inedible toy, so. 461 00:25:12,480 --> 00:25:15,151 I am trying really, really hard. 462 00:25:15,152 --> 00:25:16,947 I know I can't force anyone 463 00:25:16,948 --> 00:25:20,078 to see the great thing we're doing here, 464 00:25:20,079 --> 00:25:21,706 but I hope you will. 465 00:25:21,707 --> 00:25:23,669 Okay, Stu. 466 00:25:23,670 --> 00:25:25,589 Yeah, maybe this world is better 467 00:25:25,590 --> 00:25:28,177 than the world I came from, but... 468 00:25:28,178 --> 00:25:30,724 that doesn't mean I have a place in it. 469 00:25:30,725 --> 00:25:32,895 I still don't know who I am. 470 00:25:32,896 --> 00:25:36,360 Or how I got this way. 471 00:25:36,361 --> 00:25:40,368 And now I have nobody. I'm alone. 472 00:25:40,369 --> 00:25:41,871 Well, that's where you're wrong. 473 00:26:00,577 --> 00:26:03,270 Tiger, meet Ty-Anne. 474 00:26:03,294 --> 00:26:04,731 My daughter. 475 00:26:06,620 --> 00:26:08,134 Hi. 476 00:26:08,617 --> 00:26:12,686 Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx www. addic7ed. com 34022

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