All language subtitles for Pretty Problems.2022.eng(1)

[bed frame squeaking]

[both moaning]

- Is that-- oh, it's okay.
- You-- it's just--

Can we just-just like that?
Is that good?

Yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah,
we can go slow.

[sighing]

[laughing]

- You close?
- Um, I...

I think I lost it.

- That's okay.
- Yeah.

- But do you want to--
- Stop? Yeah, no, we can stop.

Oh, oh, great, yeah-yeah,
I have to go to work.

- So, okay, all right.
- Yeah, no, that's okay.

Good try.

Do you wanna
try again tonight?

Maybe? I don't know,
I'm supposed to meet

with Doug later,
so I don't really know

what kind of mood
I'm gonna be in.

Sorry, I always forget

you have a parole officer.

He's a probation officer.

It's not a parole--
I didn't go to jail.

That's the difference,
I keep

explaining that,
and you don't...

Do you wanna try
this weekend?

Maybe!

[shower running]

[moaning]

[grunting]

[knocking on door]
Hi.

My name's Jack Brown,
I was curious if I could

talk to you about
saving the planet today.

Uh, no, no.

Oh, hi, did you want
a fitting room,

or should I wrap it up
for you?

- Just ring it up please.
- Okay.

Can you put me on the list?

- Yeah, sure, of course.
- For, like,

- not to come back?
- "Do not come back."

I wanna-- I wanna be
on the list that's like,

never come here again
for you and your peers.

I'll take this too.

Oh, um, off the mannequin?

Just-- I'll take it.

- Okay.
- [knocking on door]

- Hey-yo!
- Hey, my name's Jack Brown.

Yeah, you're
from Titty Bingo.

Excuse me?

You know what?
Never mind.

Wait, no, what's--
what's Titty Bingo?

Oh, that's from
the Spring Resort collection.

- Yes.
- Okay.

[rowing machines whirring]

Why?

Oh, hey, welcome
to the store--

Just looking.

- [laughing]
- Caught you!

[laughing]

- Um...
- Where's that from?

- Um, the... sorry?
- The wine.

Oh, uh... the bottle?

[laughing]
You're fun.

You're fun.
That's a fun answer.

Mm-- mm!

Ugh, who serves
room temperature rosé?

Ugh, my boss.

[sighing]

That dress is good on you.

Uh, it-- it's not mine,

we, you know,
we have to wear stuff

from the store, so...

I mean, I...

I would love to show you
something similar,

or you could even--
you could try this one on.

Why'd you do that?

Well, I work here, so.

No, why'd you deflect
when I gave you a compliment?

- Oh, I--
- Is that something

- you normally do?
- Um...

You shouldn't do that.

No, we would never talk
to anyone else

the way we talk
to ourselves.

My friend Renée Brown
says that.

- Oh--
- Come with me.

Oh, my God,
you're so tall.

- I know.
- No, it's amazing.

You're like a valkyrie
or an Amazonian.

You look like Wonder Woman.

Look at you,
you're so powerful.

You look amazing, right?

Say it.

You look amazing.

- Say it.
- No, it's-- no.

- You look amazing.
- I...

[whispering]
"I look amazing."

Now you.

I look amazing.

Yeah, one more time.

- I look amazing.
- Okay, one more time.

- I look amazing.
- Now I believe you.

[laughter]

We're just having fun.

I love that. I'm Catherine.
People call me Cat.

I'm Lindsay.
People just--

- Lindz?
- --call me Lindsay.

I'm gonna call you Lindz.

You're about to go
on break, right?

- Oh, I don't--
- I feel like

you're about to go on break.

In the back of my mind,
I just, I've always wanted

to be a designer,
and then I got...

I don't know, here I am.

Working at a store,
and Jack is--

I'm sorry,
I'm a little embarrassed,

I'm just,
I'm rambling on and on.

- No, no-no.
- I-- we should--

let's just stop
talking about me.

Lindz, honestly,

I'm just happy to be
talking to another person

- who's married.
- Oh, are your friends

- not married?
- Well, I don't really...

- have a lot of friends.
- Oh, my God.

- I don't either.
- Well, who has time?

- Right?
- You know? Work, kids.

- Blah.
- Oh, you have kids.

Twins.
You don't?

Oh, no, no.

No twins, no kids, um,

we, you know,
we talked about it,

and it's not like
we're not-- not trying,

we're just not trying,

- you know?
- Well, good for you.

- We need more wine.
- [laughing]

- What's her name?
- Um, Georgia?

Georgia!

- Hey, Georgia!
- Oh, God.

Yeah, you.

Is there something
I can help you with?

My friend Lindz is
entertaining me,

and we would just
love another bottle

of that delicious rosé
you're pouring.

Oh, Lindz, is it now?

Well, Lindz,
if your friend isn't

going to buy anything,
I'm going to have to ask her

- to leave.
- Is she talking to me?

- Yes, I am.
- I'm sorry.

- You're going to leave.
- Oh, okay.

I-- okay,
I think she's mad.

Um, Lindz,
you get commission, right?

- Yeah.
- Yeah, great, okay.

Georgia? I'm gonna
take care of this.

Have you ever thought
about meditating?

So, then Cat points
to an entire rack and says,

"I'll take all of that
in a size two."

Points to another rack
and says,

"I'll take all of that
in a size four,"

because she gains weight
when they go to France.

And then she says,
"I'll take all of the boots

in a seven, and then
whatever Lindz likes."

- Ooh, "Lindz."
- Yeah, whatever Lindz likes.

You fucking hate
when people call you Lindz.

What? No, I-- sorry,
what was I saying?

You just threw me
off track.

Uh, boots and then
whatever Lindz likes.

Yes, whatever Lindz likes
from the jewelry.

"You know what, actually
I'm just gonna take

- all of the jewelry."
- Oh, fuck.

Yeah! "And I want it
hand-wrapped,

individually, by you."

- She said that to Georgia?
- To Georgia.

- And you're not fired?
- No!

I sold more in ten minutes

than that boutique has
sold in six months.

- Nice.
- Then she takes my phone,

she puts her number in it,

and says,
"You and Jack

"have to go to Sonoma
next weekend

- with Matt and I."
- ♪ Sonoma ♪

Yeah, Cat says
it's the new Napa.

Did you hear
what I just said?

What? Yeah,
no, yeah, it's wild.

Do we not get
the MLB network anymore?

Do you wanna go?

- What?
- Do you wanna go?

- What, to Napa?
- Sonoma?

- Jack.
- Bottom of the third...

I mean, don't you think
that's kind of weird?

Uh, no.
Do not cross-examine.

I'm not, I just--
you don't know this Kate.

- Cat.
- Right, but this person

just, like, blows
into your store, apparently

buys everything in it,
and then you get

a huge commission-- which,
like, you know, awesome.

And then she just
invites you to Sedona?

- Sonoma.
- What did I say?

Sedona.

My point being,
you know, this could be

some weird,
rich person sex thing

- or, like, purge thing.
- "Purge"?

Yeah, like the movies,
like-- like maybe

they wanna hunt us for sport,
did you think about that?

No, I didn't, Jack,
because I'm not an idiot.

Nice, nice, that's good.

[sighing]

I'm sorry.

[sighing]

I would really like to go.

And I would like
to understand why you want

to spend a weekend
with people you don't know.

Okay, because
she was fun

and funny
and interesting,

and she and her husband own
their own businesses.

And they have a house
and they have a family.

They have
their shit together.

I thought this could be
really good for us.

All right, when is it?

- Next weekend.
- Next weekend!

It's next weekend.
You said that, sorry.

Okay.

- Really?
- Yeah.

Yeah, I mean, you know,
I gotta get the time off

and then clear it with Doug.

- [chuckling]
- But...

- yeah, it'll be fun.
- Yeah?

- I think.
- Yeah?

- Yeah, yeah.
- Yeah?

Yeah, yeah.

- Okay.
- Okay.

- I'm gonna text her.
- Great.

- Okay.
- If they purge us, though,

I get to be
super-pissed off.

I mean, it could be
the sex thing.

No.

I knew we should've
printed the directions.

Well, I mean, I didn't know
that there would be

- no service.
- This is what rich people do.

They go off the grid
for vacation.

Because you know
so many rich people?

No, but I do watch
"Billions,"

and this is-- this is
a total Axe move.

Okay.

Where the fuck are we?

- We're in wine country.
- So why are there cows?

There should be grapes.
Read the invite again?

"You are cordially
invited to a weekend

"of wine and whimsy
at Vlas Vineyard.

7766 Lewis Road."

Oh, my God.

And there's a star
and a picture of a cow.

So we are clearly close.

- That's a murder house.
- What?

Yeah. That's a house
where a murder happens.

- What are you talking about?
- My mom always said

you would kill me,
and you've finally done it.

- This is great.
- All right, "Purge."

Look, they're obviously

very, very wealthy.

You're gonna have
to call them.

- I...
- We're just gonna

sit here like weirdos.

Hi! It's Jack and Lindsay!

[knocking on door]

- No, Jack!
- Hello?

Don't be rude!

Hello?

[scoffing]

[whispering]
This man is made of dicks.

- [whispering] Jack!
- What? He'--

No, I need you
to be cool, okay?

- I am, I am cool.
- No, listen to me.

I really like her,
and she's being really nice

to invite us up here,
and I'm not really great

at making friends,
so I just need you to--

- No, I will keep it tight.
- Tightest.

Okay.

- [cork popping]
- [cheering]

- Oh!
- [laughter]

[Matt] Let's get
the birthday weekend started!

- Let's do it!
- [overlapping chatter]

- Hey!
- [both] Hi.

- You made it!
- Hi!

Hey, can we get Jack
and Lindsay some drinks?

- Hi.
- Hi.

- Thank you.
- Oh, thank you.

Did you get
the champagne? Great.

I am so grateful
you're here.

[whispering]
I have been losing my mind.

Jack, it is so nice
to finally meet you.

You are so lucky
to have her.

- She's so special.
- Oh, yeah, no, thank you.

- Yeah, of course.
- Jack and Lindz,

these are our friends
Kerry and Carrie.

We know.
It's okay to laugh.

I didn't know his name was
Kerry when we met.

Yeah, she was modeling
at this world wildlife

fundraiser-fashion show-
interactive theater

sort of thing
that Jared was doing.

- Leto, not Kushner.
- Yeah, of course.

That Jared was doing
at Dumbo--

We were all playing
the emotions of penguins

that were killed
for their scales.

Right, right, and the girls
were only allowed to show

- what emotion they were.
- Sad.

Which was super-convincing,
'cause I thought

- her name was--
- [both] Sad.

--for, like, a week.

But, in my defense, I was
pretty fuckin' banged up.

- [laughter]
- He spent $65,000

- on champagne.
- Yeah, and then we did

a couple of grams
of Bolivian marching powder

- in the bathroom.
- And we tried to have sex.

In the bathroom.

But he couldn't get hard.

[both] Because of the blow.

- [laughter]
- And we've been together

- pretty much ever since.
- Ahh!

Classic Kerry, right, babe?

Can I steal her
for a sec?

Oh, yeah,
by all means.

Great.

I've heard that story
a million times.

- [chuckling]
- You're welcome.

- My man.
- Yeah.

- Matt Flax.
- Jack Brown.

- Pleasure there, bud.
- Good to meet you.

Nice to meet you too.
Thank you.

Yeah, no, my...
this is...

hey, can I--
do you mind?

Oh, yeah, that's great,
thank you, Becca.

Thank you, Becca.

- Hi.
- Hi.

God, I hate those people.

Really?
They seem nice.

Oh, they're not.
[laughing]

- They're such assholes.
- Really?

Yes.
So, how's Jack doing?

He thinks
we're crazy, right?

What? No.

I mean... he thinks
you're gonna murder us.

[laughing]

I mean,
he's-- he's joking.

Oh, my God, no,
I totally get it.

I'm just, like,
this crazy stranger

who stumbles
into your store

and then invites you
to Healdsburg.

[chuckling]
Who does that?

Actually, that would make
a really good horror movie.

Should we write that?

I love that idea.

I'm sorry, I thought
we were in Sonoma.

Oh, we are,
but it's actually Healdsburg,

technically Windsor, but it's
all in the Sonoma region.

Oh, okay.

You know what?
Um, Jack and I were talking,

on the way up,
and we were thinking--

I just felt an immediate
connection to you.

You seem so...

- Sad?
- [laughing]

That's a good callback.

No, just... undervalued.

You're not supposed
to be selling

other people's clothes.

Well, I-- I mean,
I don't want to be.

Then why are you?

Student debt.

Oh.

You enjoying the brew?

You-- holy shit, you can't--
you can't get this

- in California.
- Pause.

You buy the distributor,
you can do whatever you want.

- [laughing]
- You buy the--

- you bought the distributor?
- Anyway,

let me tell you
a quick story, so that

you don't have to hear it
from Kerry later.

His grandfather
invented tater tots.

- Get the fuck out of here.
- No, it's an epic story.

He was working KP,
kitchen duty, in World War II,

not in the shit,
he was in, like,

Mississippi or something,
and there were

all these little
extra pieces of potato

that they weren't using,
so the guys in the kitchen

started frying 'em up,
and the grunts loved 'em.

So the war ends, and this guy
has got the foresight

to trademark the thing--

the rest of the KP guys
were pissed.

Wait, he didn't cut 'em in?

No, man, the guy was
a fuckin' killer.

- You know?
- Yeah.

[whispering]
Killer. Killer instinct.

- [sighing]
- Wow.

Uh, so...
how many more people are

- coming up this weekend?
- Oh, this is it.

Cat wanted to keep it pretty
intimate for her birthday.

And we were gonna
blow it out for 30, so...

she wanted to keep it
simple for 29.

- It's Cat's birthday?
- What-- 69?!

- [laughing] My guy!
- It's her birthday?

I feel like
I might know the waiter.

- Mm, which one?
- The guy.

Daniel?

- Daniel...
- Yeah.

Huh.

- Uh--
- Do you know him?

- Where are the twins?
- Oh, they're back

with the au pair
in the city.

We wanted to get away
this weekend.

Oh, hell yeah, good for you.

Yeah, it's my birthday.

I didn't want
to think about it.

Them-- they're obvious--

they're people,
I love them.

Did you just say
it was your birthday?

- Yeah.
- Your birthday?!

- Yeah.
- Oh, my God!

I didn't bring anything!

- Oh, that's okay.
- No, I'm so sorry.

Trust me,
you being here is enough.

I really want you
to let me cook you dinner.

- Oh-- ew, no!
- Please.

- No?
- Ew, no-no-no.

We have--
We have people who do that.

You just be our guest.

Just relax, enjoy.

- Okay.
- Yeah.

I'm just happy
you're here.

- Mmm.
- Hey.

[all] Hi.

- Hi.
- Hi.

You know-- hi,
I think

Lindsay and I would love
to take a moment

to just go check out
our room real quick.

- Just get situated.
- Oh...

yeah, I'm--
I'm so sorry.

I-- I forget that being
up here makes people...

- Oh--
- Oh, no-no-no--

You two go unload.

Wink-wink, sorry,
I'm-- I'm so inappropriate.

Sometimes
I have to-- Becca!

Could you please show
our guests to their room?

- Hi.
- Of course.

We took the liberty
of putting

- your bags in your room.
- I'm just gonna assume

it's that one there at the end
of the hallway, right?

So I think we can probably
get there on our own.

- Thank you.
- You're welcome.

[Lindsay] Holy shit,
this is a guest room?

He bought
my favorite brewery.

- What?
- He bought...

well, he bought
the distribution--

how did he know
that's my favorite beer?

Oh, I mean, I don't know,
he probably, like,

Instagrammed you
or Facebooked you,

- or whatever.
- So he stalked me?

No, he Googled you.

We all do it.
We all Google each other,

and then we act surprised
when people tell us shit

that we already know
about ourselves.

Did you know
it was her birthday?

- Mm...
- That's kind of weird

she wouldn't tell us
that we were up here

- for her birthday.
- Well, I think that--

Where are our bags?

Um...

they're in here,
in a closet.

- Jesus.
- They're unpacked.

They are definitely
gonna kill us.

[Jack] Hey,
what are these?

I don't know.

Gift bags!

Oh, my God!

- Jesus.
- Jack, these are so nice!

I've got facewash...

- Hangover kit...
- Beard trim lotion...

- Massage oil...
- I have lube...

- Really?
- Yes, there's, like,

a tremendous amount
of sex stuff in here.

- Oh, my God.
- And I have Viagra.

[gasping]

I told you
it was a sex thing.

- Yes, yes, you did.
- [laughing]

Gum...

Hey.

Can-- Can we not do
any drugs this weekend?

- Who's doing drugs?
- I mean, the first thing

- that guy said was--
- Which guy?

Kerry, the tall guy.

He said
he does a lot of blow.

- Okay?
- And there are

joints in my bag.

- Which are totally legal.
- They are, for people

that aren't on probation
and have to piss

- in a cup every week.
- Well, I mean...

well, that's not
their fault.

Okay.

There are six people here.

- Okay.
- Mm-hmm,

- and there's an itinerary.
- Wine tasting, karaoke,

brunch, yoga,
massages!

Jack, this is like a resort.

"Jumpin' Jack Flash."

What?
That's so rad.

What's mine say?

"Lazy Lindz."

Oh, well...

You still hate when people
call you "Lindz," right?

- Oh, yeah.
- They...

- Don't know that.
- Right.

You wanna...

unload?

Now?

You don't really seem
like you want to.

- Yeah, I don't.
- [laughing]

[soft music]

[soft chatter]

Fuck, I should've changed.

- No, you look fine.
- I look fucking homeless.

- You look fine.
- Jack, Lindz,

- you guys get situated?
- Yeah, yeah.

Somebody unpacked our stuff.

Oh, yeah,
that was Milton.

He is the fucking best.

- Milton?
- Well,

I say Milton,
I mean Daniel and Becca.

- But yeah.
- Okay, you know,

by the way, thank you
for the bags.

- They're incredible.
- Oh, did we do bags?

Hey, babe,
what's in the bags?

I don't know,
I told Milton to do

the kits again and then
just to do something

- comfy but fun.
- Guys, seriously.

Are they comfy but fun?

- Very.
- [both] Great.

Hey, I was--
I'm still not getting

any cell phone reception.

- Yeah, and you won't.
- What?

No internet either.

Only way I can
keep him off the grid.

She calls it a digital detox.

We just get to be
here, together,

without any interruptions.

Wow, that's... that's crazy.

So, what are we doing
for dinner?

[laughing] I'm-- I'm happy
to help in the kitchen

- with the vegan--
- [Cat] Oh, no-no-no.

Come here, I wanna show you
something, Ker, come here.

You boys go away,
I want Lindz to myself.

- Okay.
- Come here.

You have fun.

- Jack?
- Yeah.

What are you drinking?

Just whatever you got
there is perfect.

- Thank you.
- [both] Tequila.

- Oh.
- Bing.

Bang.

- Bong.
- Boom.

- Cheers.
- Cheers, yes, thanks, guys.

- Fuck me, that's good.
- Right? Yeah?

What-- is this--
is this Casa? What is this?

It's from me and Matt's
place in Jalisco.

- Jalisco?
- Yeah,

the tequila capital
of the world, Jack.

- Is this your tequila?
- Well, mine and Ker's,

- but yeah.
- Oh, my God, that is cool.

Yeah, we don't
sell it, though.

Yeah, it's just
for personal consumption.

Mm-hmm, do you love it?
Or do you love it?

- You love it.
- Kerry?

- Yes?
- I fucking love

- this tequila.
- I knew it.

We'll have--
we'll send you a case, huh?

Thank you, man, that's
really-- that's really sweet.

Thank you. That's really
nice of you guys.

Of course.
Hey, come on.

- I wanna show you the view.
- Yeah-yeah-yeah.

Hey, actually, you gotta
finish your drink.

No man refills
till every man is refueled.

- It's a house rule.
- I told my wife I wasn't

gonna drink too much,
so I'm probably just gonna,

like, I'll just sip it
a little bit, maybe,

like a water in there,
maybe a juice--

How are you gonna
drink too much?

We're not going anywhere.

- [laughing]
- I-I...

- Bottoms up!
- Okay, okay.

[indistinct chanting]

- I'm too-- let's go.
- It's really nice, though.

It's kind of oaky.

Becca had our chef
prep everything

and then run it up here
this morning.

[whispering]
Don't tell anyone.

- No.
- Wine?

- Yes, please.
- Okay.

- Here you go.
- Thank you.

You're welcome.

These are beautiful glasses.

Oh, thank you.

Yeah, they're kind of
one of a kind.

Um... whoo.

Okay, and...

here you go...

Ooh, sorry,
it's just about out, so.

- That's fine.
- Awesome, okay.

Um...

I mean, I can't even imagine
having to do another trip

with just the four of us.

I mean, the boys are
inseparable.

And then it's just me and...

- [laughing]
- I mean,

I just get drunk.
There's nothing else to do.

- Well, cheers.
- Thank you, God...

It's the fucking best, right?

[Jack laughing]

I can't believe
you're here, Jack.

I can't believe it
either, man.

Oh, no-no, no,
you misunderstand me.

Cat doesn't like people.

Not certain people.
People. I thought

she was joking when she said
she invited you up here.

Honestly, dude, I--
I thought Lindsay was--

like, I still--
I still think this is a joke.

I'm, like, waiting
for fucking Ashton Kutcher

to pop out of the couch
or something.

- Dude, is Ashton coming?
- He's just joking, Kerry.

Wait, you guys know
Ashton Kutcher?

- Fuck, we used to--
- They had a big--

- It doesn't matter.
- --thing.

What, were you guys, like,
the house rules thing--

- were you guys in a frat--
- No, we went

- to a prep school together.
- Yeah, go, Cavs, whoo!

And I was a first-gen,
and Kerry was not

an old-money dickbag
like the rest of those guys.

So you got a lot of these guys
coming to these schools

who are, like,
deep old money.

Like, fucked up
industrial revolution money.

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

Matt was one of the first
hedge fund guy's kids

- to roll through.
- Mm.

Your dad was
a hedge fund guy?

Yeah, yeah, he was.

And then he was
an insider trading guy.

- And then he was a jail guy.
- Whoa.

And we lost everything,
and my mother had to...

go back to waiting tables
at age 45

at a shitty restaurant,

and I had to drop out
of school and take a job

bagging groceries,
and then kind of

the cherry
on top of it all...

my dad killed himself
when he was in prison.

Oh, Jesus Christ,
man, I'm sorry.

And it kind of
ruined my mom, and...

she couldn't work
anymore, and...

so I decided
to start working nights

at Blockbuster, and...
when I was there,

I pretty quickly identified
that their whole market share

was just gonna crumble
with the way that the internet

was gonna be going
with streaming services.

- You were how old?
- Oh, was...

- [both] Seventeen.
- Yeah, 17,

but it wasn't
rocket science, right?

Everybody had
big screen TVs,

because the Korean tech
finally caught up

to the need or want
of Japanese TVs.

Thanks to an investment
from my guy here

and some money
over at Netflix,

and a few other
well-placed investments...

here we are.

You did this by yourself?

What? No.

Did you listen
to anything I just said?

My life is a Rube Goldberg
machine of privilege.

It was, like...
[whistling]

...boarding school, bing,
university, boom,

investment,
no, man, come on.

No, you don't-- you don't
get this by yourself.

You-- You get this
with a little bit of capital

and a fuckton of luck.

- Hey, to luck.
- To luck.

- Yeah.
- Yeah?

[clinking]

It is so nice to have
another adult to talk to.

I mean, Kerry just runs
through these girls.

This one's clearly nearing
her expiration date.

And they've obviously
stopped fucking, right?

[laughing]
How-- How can you tell?

[chuckling]
Stop!

"How can you tell?"

Ugh, you're hilarious.

Do you ever do stand-up?

- No.
- Really? You should.

You could be, like,
Sarah Silverman's

- little sister.
- [ding]

Oh! Time to rotate
the mung bean balls.

- Becca!
- Thank you, Becca.

You're so cute.

[humming]

No, no, no!

So, what business are
you in, Jack?

Oh, I'm a-- it's boring,
it's renewable energy.

Oh, dope!
Dope, so, like,

- design or infrastructure?
- No, it's again, it's solar.

- It's not--
- Oh, beta, okay, all right.

So, are you enjoying
that Tesla tax write-off then?

[laughing]
I, uh...

I sell them.

The solar panels.
I go-- I go door to door,

and I try
to sell them to people.

Jack is being bashful.
He was a lawyer.

- Oh, sick!
- Yeah, but then

he got hit
with an assault charge.

- Oh, misdemeanor felony.
- Was a felony,

but he got it kicked
down to a misdemeanor,

and now he's serving probation
for... three years?

Five...

how do you know that?

Got a guy at the FBI.

And he feeds me information
whenever I have anybody

over to the house.
It's stupid,

but it's--
it's all about safety.

[stifled laughter]

Oh, my God,
you should see your face.

Come on!

Oh, my God,
no, man, that was...

that... that was good,

no, your wife told
my wife, man.

She-- She told Cat that?

Yeah, man,
that's just what they do,

they get alone,
and they just--

[clicks tongue]
--take us down a peg.

- So what happened?
- I...

I have anger
management issues.

Oh, cool, me too!

Oh, so that's
why you're in therapy.

- Got it, got it, got it...
- Lindsay...

Lindsay told Cat that?

Oh, no, that was
Milton's guy at the FBI.

- He told us that.
- [laughing]

So, it's weird
you know that, man.

- What?
- You know, the therapy,

- that's...
- Dude,

I fuckin' love therapy,
what are you talking about?

No, it's great, just I...

you just, you know,
like, a lot about me,

and I don't really know
anything about you.

Well, if we're
keeping track, my man,

you know that
my father went to prison

- and that he killed himself.
- I...

Hey, that was
a super-vulnerable thing

to tell a stranger.

- Thanks, bud.
- You're welcome, bro.

Yeah, okay, so, um,

- Lindsay--
- Who?

- My wife.
- Lindz.

- Yeah, Lindz.
- Oh.

Lindz, Lindz got into
an argument with this guy

- in a bar, and--
- So you hit him.

No, I mean,
it's not that simple.

- But you hit the guy.
- Yeah, but--

- So it is--
- What?

[both] That simple.

No, I mean, you know,

this fucking guy...

this fucking asshole,
you know, he's fucking--

he's getting into it with
my wife, and the fucking...

he calls her a fucking--
[whispering] cunt.

- A wh-- a what?
- [whispering] Cunt.

- Cuh-- what is he saying?
- I don't have any idea.

- A cunt.
- [both] Oh.

And this fucking asshole
calls my wife--

- Lindz.
- Yes, Lindz, Lindz,

a fucking cunt, you know,
so I fucking--

I get really
in the guy's face,

he fucking shoves me, and I--
I just-- I fucking hit him,

man, I just fucking hit him
across his fucking face.

- Yeah, fuck yeah, dude.
- Fuck yeah.

And this motherfucker,
he ends up being

the fucking son of
a prominent state senator,

- and I'm fucking...
- [both] Oh, fuck.

Jackie.

That's...

that's a hell
of a break, man.

Sometimes you don't
have any capital,

and you're really
fucking unlucky,

and you end up disbarred,
on probation,

selling fucking solar panels
door-to-door, so.

- Yeah.
- Hey, here's

to bad luck too, right,
'cause what's the fucking good

without the bad, yeah?

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

- To Jack. Oh.
- And...

and for what it's worth,

I'd hit the guy too.

- [Ker] To Jack.
- Thanks.

Let's get
some mung bean bowls.

Then we can all go throw up,
it'll be great.

[Cat] Who's ready
for karaoke?!

[cheering]

[rock 'n roll playing]

[all] Jack attack!
Jack attack!

[slurring]
♪ They call the rising... ♪

[incoherent singing]

Your husband is so funny!

Oh, he is definitely
having fun.

Guys, take the microphone.

♪ Bum-bum-bum-bum hyah! ♪

- No, Jack! No!
- [laughing]

Jack, Jack.

Oh, no, I broke--
I got it!

- You gotta-- it's okay.
- Yeah, Jack!

We'll have someone
clean it up tomorrow.

- Don't worry about it.
- Whoo! Gotta do it again.

No, I did not keep it tight.

My son made that one,
and it is not...

[Jack] ...so mad at me.

Oh, man, Kerry kept
making me take shots,

and I said no,
but then I did 'em.

- So...
- Hey, Jack?

- Hmm? Yeah?
- Honey? This way.

- Mm-kay.
- Okay.

Here we go.
Yeah, okay, that's good.

- Thank you.
- Okay.

- What are you gonna do?
- Um, I'm going to go to bed.

What? No, go have fun.

- Really?
- Um, yeah.

You're having fun, right?

I mean, yeah,
I'm having a lot of fun.

- Good.
- Okay.

- Okay.
- All right.

- Mm.
- Mm.

- [laughing] ...Matt.
- Good night.

- What?
- Matt, he said--

guy is so smart,
so smart.

He was talking
Korean technology,

Japanese green energy, money.

[scoffing]
He's the best.

He's really smart--
Jack, you should talk to him.

You should talk to him over
the weekend about business.

I mean, maybe he could
help you find a job.

Nah, I have a job.

I just-- I meant maybe
something that you liked

because you don't
love your job.

And maybe there could be
something there

like a different career
or something.

Okay, good night.

Good night,
there's water by the bed.

[up-tempo rock]

Uh, hi, um,
can I get a tequila?

- Lindsay.
- Um, Daniel, right?

Lindsay.

You don't recognize me?

Dan.

Dan Bishop.

- Lindsay Simpson.
- [laughing]

- Holy shit.
- I know.

- Oh, my God.
- [both laughing]

What are you doing here?

Uh, I work
for the Flaxes.

Well, I work for Milton.

But yeah,

Oh, my God,
that-- I mean,

Wow, you--
you look so different.

I know, well,
I was a trainer at SeaWorld,

and I quit that
when it stopped being cool

and, you know, started
fighting the fires up here,

and went to Burning Man,
met these folks--

- it was like--
- Oh, my God!

It all fell into line.

That is truly wild.

Um, I just--
thank you.

- Um, so...
- And, uh, your husband,

- he was, what--
- He's a lawyer.

- He's a lawyer.
- He is?

And I work in fashion.

- What? That's amazing.
- Yeah.

Thank you, um, can I--

- can I get just a little--
- Lindsay Simpson.

--just a refill,
my song's about to come up.

- So I gotta--
- Well, let's get you

- warmed up, girl.
- I gotta go, but you,

you look great,
it's so good to see you.

I'll see you.
We'll be seeing you.

Yeah, I'll be here
all weekend, don't worry.

[sighing]

Hi...ya.

I was hoping
you would come back.

Oh, my God.

- Is Jack okay?
- Jack is fine.

He didn't throw up
or anything? Does he need--

No, no-no-no,
he's sleeping, um,

do you remember earlier,
when I said that I thought

- I recognized the waiter?
- Oh, Daniel.

- Yeah, Dan.
- Daniel.

Dan, Dan Bishop.

I went to high school
with Dan.

Daniel Bishop.
Shut up.

- Yeah, no, I went--
- What are the odds?

The odds that I, uh,
would be a person

who had a lot of sex
with someone

- who works at her house?
- You did sex--

Are very small!

- Wow!
- Yeah.

That is so hot.

Well...

That's not all.

Dan had a nickname.

- What was his nickname?
- Big Dick Dan.

- Big Dick Dan?
- Dan has a massive dick.

- [laughing]
- Yes!

- I love that.
- Okay.

- I love that so much.
- Well, yeah.

- Oh, my gosh.
- It would be so fun

and such a fun story

if it wasn't for the fact that
all of my sorority sisters

knew about it--
when I started dating Jack,

they would tease him.

Does Jack not have
a big dick?

No, Jack has a great dick.

He has a great dick,
it's just like,

it's like husband dick,
like he's my husband.

- You know?
- Yeah, I do know.

- Unfortunately.
- He's been pretty cool

about it,
it's just that...

I-- I don't know
how he's gonna react.

- Mmm.
- It's an old wound.

- You know what I mean?
- Why does it-- Why does it

need to be a thing?

Well, because I'm gonna be

a terrible person
if I don't tell him.

You don't have
to tell him shit.

- What?
- Why do you have

to tell him that?
You could just not tell him.

In what world do I just
ignore Big Dick Dan

- for the rest of the week?
- I don't want you to.

But maybe you kind of have to.

Or I could just fire him.

- Because then--
- What?!

you don't have
to think about it,

Jack doesn't have to get
upset, and then we can--

- Are you messing with me?
- Daniel!

- No! Cat, seriously.
- I feel like you--

No, tequila's great!
Thank you!

- [whispering] Stop it!
- I'm sorry, I just

want you to have
a good time, okay?

- Okay, so then--
- Okay.

--maybe for tonight
we can just...

- forget about it?
- Hey, can you keep a secret?

- Yeah.
- Keep it a secret.

[rock 'n roll playing]

[drums thumping]

[retching]

[music fading]

[sighing]
Fuck...

Oh...

Oh, my...

Oh, fuck.

Oh.

[Matt] Babe, this doesn't
even have to be an argument.

I can take the plane
and be back in time from Dubai

to see his art installation.

[Cat] Except
I don't believe you.

You're not gonna make it
back at time, and then I--

Why does he wear so much
eyeliner to those things?

Because it's part
of his look.

He's establishing himself
as an artist.

Well, I don't wanna
raise a weird kid

who dresses in black
all the time.

If he's weird,
then he's gonna be--

Jack, hey, morning!
You sleep okay?

- Hi, is Lindz up?
- Uh, no, no.

She, um...

I'm-- I am like--

uh, we-we-we... we got
after it last night, huh?

You definitely took it
up a notch, my man,

but hey, when you work hard,
you get to play hard.

Am I right?

You going for a run?

Yeah, yeah, no,
I'm gonna, you know,

try to sweat it out
before I put it back in.

Detox, retox,
circle of life.

- You should use the gym.
- The gym?

There's one downstairs
and then another one

- down below by the pool.
- The pool?

Yeah, the one downstairs
is kind of sterile.

Agreed, I prefer
the one at the guest house.

- The guest house?
- Also, Kerry's

in the gym downstairs,
and he is a lot in there.

- At the guest house.
- No, downstairs.

But I think
Carrie's at the sauna.

- Oh.
- Where?

- By the pool.
- Which is?

- Down below.
- Down below.

Great.

[clicks tongue]

There it is.
[imitates gunshots]

- Have fun.
- Sweat it out.

- He's gonna get lost.
- Yeah.

[Kerry] Hah! Hah!

Hah!

Hah! Hah!
Hey, buddy!

Hah!

I miss you, Daddy!
I miss you, Daddy!

I hate you,
Daddy!

[banjo music]

- Hey.
- Hey.

- How you doing?
- I'm good, brother.

Just enjoying the bounty
of a beautiful day.

- Right on.
- Hey, you're Jack, right?

- Lindsay's husband.
- Yeah, yeah, man, you guys--

Man, it is great
to meet you.

[panting]
Yeah, you guys...

you guys too,
I'm looking for the...

- the guest house?
- Which one?

The... The one
with the pool?

Oh, yeah, it's just
right down that way.

- You're heading there, right?
- That way?

- Yeah.
- So I just-- okay.

Follow the path, brother,
you'll get there.

Oh, hey!
I'm here, sorry.

- I'm here.
- [laughing]

- You almost saw me naked.
- I almost did.

- Almost.
- Almost.

- Oh!
- [laughing]

[laughing]
One more!

Oh, please--
please stop doing that.

I'm just kidding.
I wouldn't do that.

- Okay.
- Maybe I would.

I...
[laughing]

Oh, my God, how fucking
absurd is this place?

Thank you.
Thank you, this is like,

I've never seen
anything like this.

I, like, need this
to work out with me and Ker.

I can't go
back to being poor.

Back to being a model, yeah?

- I'm an actress.
- Oh, that's cool.

Have I seen you in anything?

Do you watch
"Murderer Minds"?

- No.
- I was murdered on it.

- Cool.
- I also sing,

dance, paint.

Run a wellness
Instagram account

with over
50,000 followers.

Oh, wow. You got
a lot going on, huh?

Not really, I just try
to speak it into existence.

Like "The Secret."

No, it's not a secret.
I just don't wanna work hard.

Okay.

I'm bored.

Cool.

- [music]
- [snoring]

Oh...

[slow R&B]

[retching]

[music fading]

- Oh, my God.
- Yeah.

- What're you getting?
- Mischief.

All right, okay.

How about a little--
ooh, this one has

- some secrets.
- [laughing]

[Carrie] Did you guys know
that nearly 3%

of Atlantic glaciers is
penguin urine?

Car, who told you that?

I learned it at Harvard.

[laughing]

That's awesome.
You went to Harvard.

Yeah, you didn't know?

- No, no, I didn't...
- [sighing]

Lindz, just have one.

- God, I--
- Come on, we're wine tasting

in, like, 30 minutes, this'll
get you back in the game.

I know, I just-- I feel
like I'm dying right now.

Did you drink
the electrolytes?

- Yeah.
- Oh.

I'll text Milton
and have him put

- another kit in the room.
- Okay.

I'm sorry, hey,
who-- who is Milton?

He's Milton.

What would you say
his job is?

- Jack.
- Um...

I think he was, like,
a party planner

or maybe
an interior designer.

Um, Matt, babe,
how would you describe

- what Milton does?
- Uh...

he's...
he's Milton.

Okay, and then
the-- the-the guys,

I met the guy watering
the plant today

- with the mullet.
- Uh, that is Daniel.

- Daniel-- and Daniel--
- Oh, Dan!

Yeah, Brother Dan,
Dan is the man!

Daniel is Daniel,
and I...

don't want to talk
about it anymore.

[Matt] It's high acid.

What I do want
to talk about is

my-- babe--

- Do you feel that--
- Babe, I'm trying to--

- I'm having a moment.
- What, babe, what?

- Please.
- I'm talking--

I'm talking too!

What I do want
to talk about is

my friend Lindz.

Matt, did you know
that Lindz was studying

at FIDM
before Jack got disbarred

- and her mother died?
- Oh, no, I didn't know that.

- Yeah.
- Jack didn't get disbarred.

- He's just--
- She wanted to make upscale

sustainable clothing.

You want to make
upscale sustainable clothing.

I've been thinking about it,
and I wanna help Lindz

realize her dream
of becoming a girlboss.

Yes, girlboss.

- Wait, what?
- Wait, what?

I think we should invest
in our friend Lindz

and help make
her dream a reality.

Hey...

sure, yeah.

Right on--
congrats, Lindz.

- Let's do it.
- Yeah!

- Let's do it.
- Congratulations!

[overlapping chatter]

- What--
- Cheers! Cheers!

- Yeah, no, we're...
- Congratulations.

Oh, sure,
it's... thank you!

- Oh, my God.
- Of course.

- Yeah.
- So, I-- I mean,

what...

so do you wanna do the store?
Or do you wanna do a line?

Oh, well, I haven't really
thought about it, let's talk

- about it later, okay?
- Okay.

We gotta do wine tasting
first, remember?

- What just happened?
- Wine tasting

- is happening.
- Whoo!

There's this cute
little place down the road.

All the workers who pick
the grapes are given

insurance
and livable wages.

- And we have to support them.
- I got it.

Matt, do you wanna--
do you want me to pitch in?

I could just sell
my car or something.

- I could probably...
- [laughter]

- This guy!
- We got it.

- He's so funny.
- You know--

Jack, I will
take payment from you

in karate-chopping
my enemies.

- [laughing]
- Kerry, Kerry,

did you hear that?
That was so funny.

- Hilarious.
- Finish your drinks.

- Finish your drinks, dummies.
- Let's go, come on.

- Okay, okay, bottoms up.
- Oh, hey--

- Yes.
- Jack, are you gonna drive?

Yeah, I'll drive
Lindsay and I separate,

and we'll meet you guys
there, yeah?

- What the fuck just happened?
- I know.

Okay, this is now not
just a fun weekend,

this is also
a business weekend.

She could become
my colleague.

Keeping it tight,
maybe not joke about us

being poor
at the dinner table?

But we're--
we're not poor.

No, I know
that we're not poor,

but compared to them,
we definitely are.

Right, but compared to them,

99.9% of the world is,

I mean, Gary's grandfather
invented tater tots,

and Matt's worth, like,
a billion dollars.

- How do you know?
- I had service

in the restaurant
and Googled him.

Wait, why--

- why'd you Google him?
- Why'd I...

He ran a background check
on me-- I can't Google him?

- No, I just--
- You said everybody Googles.

Okay, just stop saying Google.

[music]

Get your nose in the glass.

Get it in there.
Further, further.

Come on,
let's go ask Georges.

Get it in there.

Georges?
Am I on pills,

or does this taste
more like a burgundy?

[laughing]
No, you're not.

Actually, it's because
it has a lower

alcohol content
than most California pinots.

- Mmm.
- It's because

we're biodynamic.

- Obviously.
- Obviously, now,

correct me if I'm wrong,
but aren't you only

one of four biodynamic
vineyards in California?

- Am I right?
- One of four

certified by
the French government.

- Ahh.
- Yes.

I love France.

- Yeah, she does!
- Yeah, baby!

That's... a great place.

I love France.

Honestly, I would love
to go to Provence.

Oh, we're going.

After you've set up the line.

You're-- You're really serious
about this, aren't you?

Be pretty fucked up
if I wasn't.

- [laughing]
- [Matt] Hey, babe?

- Yeah, babe?
- What-- What do we like?

Uh, what do you like?

- Um-- oh, I like the white.
- Which?

Oh, um...
all of 'em.

Get all the whites!

[clicking tongue]

You can spit the wine.
You don't have to swallow it

- every time.
- Oh!

No, I like swallowing.

You heard the lady,
why don't we do

a case of each?

Oh...

okay.
[laughing]

Okay, um, why don't
I bring those to the car?

And you can finish up
your glasses here?

- Love it.
- Actually, Georges,

you know what?
Why don't you just, uh,

why don't you
just double it?

Oh... double it?

- Yeah, two cases of each.
- Each.

- [laughing]
- Okay, well, sorry.

I went to Berkeley,

so we didn't--
numbers were just shapes.

- Sure, sure, sure...
- So, you want...

two of both varietals
or four of both varietals?

- Yes, both.
- Yes, both.

- Each.
- Each.

Wonderful.

- That's white.
- Oh-- oopsies.

It's rosé.

I don't think--
is that how they make rosé?

Mm-hm, you just mix
red and white.

- Okay. Hi, hi.
- Hi, um,

- which one did you like?
- I, uh...

- Hi, thank you.
- Try the rosé.

- Hi.
- No, it's-- we're great.

Which-- Which wine did
I like, Carrie?

Jackie likes
the penis noir.

[laughter]

Penis... pinot noir.

'Cause he likes the penis!

- Okay.
- Okay, hey,

so I think
we should get some wine.

- Can you take care of that?
- Yeah.

Yeah, no,
I'll get some wine.

That's good. Can you maybe
just-- no, okay.

Bye.

- Excuse me, sir?
- Yeah?

I guess I need
a bottle of, um, the--

the pinot noir.

Okay, just a bottle?

Yeah, just--
just a bottle, please?

- Can I see the price sheet?
- No.

I'm sorry, I...

it's market price,
so it just kind of like

is what I feel
at the moment.

- Whoa!
- [Lindsay] Oh, my God.

- Oh! Okay.
- There she goes.

- Just--
- There she goes.

- Oh, boy.
- She's fun.

- Yeah, she's fun.
- Oh, maybe we--

maybe we get to some
water there, Car-Bear.

No water...
[muttering]

Hey, Kerry, do you wanna
help me out here, bud?

Dude, she's like 11 pounds,
you got it.

- Okay.
- You're doing great, Jack.

- Okay...
- Whee!

Okay, I'm just gonna...

Ballet!

- Turn her on her side.
- Oh, that's sweet.

- That's sweet.
- Well, I just don't want her

to throw up
on those hair extensions.

Take off those shoes,
they're very expensive.

I have those.
My wife has those.

Yeah.

- Carrie is drunk.
- Yeah.

Maybe we oughta,
like... yeah?

- Yeah, yeah.
- Okay.

- Sure.
- [laughter]

- You're terrible.
- I know.

So bad.
She's the worst, though.

[laughter]

No, you did not say that.

You didn't.

- Hey.
- Oh, my God.

Uh, we may need
to Uber home.

- Ooh, we don't have room?
- Yeah, no.

Hey, I got the wine.

- Yeah, what?
- Just...

[whispering]
...why did you

only get a bottle?

Well, because Carrie said
it was my favorite.

It's the penis noir,
and then

Matt said it would go
with the BBQ tonight.

Okay, but why didn't
you get a case?

'Cause they're, like,
really expensive.

- Like how expensive?
- Like-- Like, a lot.

- What's a lot?
- Like, $50 a bottle.

Oh... okay, well,

just put it on the Mastercard.
We can afford that.

You wanna waste $300
on six bottles of wine?

- A case is 12.
- A case is six.

- A case of beer is 12.
- A case of beer is 24.

- What is a case of 12?
- I have no idea, White Claw?

Just buy it.

Lindsay,
that's a car payment.

Hey, Georges,
I'm so sorry.

- Hi.
- Hi.

My husband made a mistake.

We are actually going
to take a case

of the pinot grigio.

- Pinot noir.
- Of the pinot noir.

- [laughing]
- Absolutely.

And you know what,
actually, we're gonna get

two cases, right?

Because we can have
one with the dinner tonight,

and then we can take one home,
right, Jack?

It's gonna go great
with the dinner.

Yeah, you know,
you do get a discount

if you buy a case.
That's great.

So just charge
the same card?

- Yes, absolutely.
- Okay.

- Thank you so much.
- That is...

- so thoughtful of you.
- Ugh, oh, my gosh.

It's the least we could do,
right, Jack?

Yeah, yeah, you know,
I just-- I just had a thought.

What if-- What if we take
the Tesla back

since we're waiting
for the rest of the wine

to show up, and you guys
just take my car,

and we'll see you
back there, yeah?

- You sure?
- Yeah.

Do you know
how to drive a Tesla,

- Jack?
- Do I...

I think
the real question, Ker,

is do you know
how to drive a Corolla?

[laughter]
So funny.

You-- You put it in drive?

Yep, just start it, drive,
you're good to go.

- All right.
- Okay.

- Okay.
- Okay, cool,

we'll just do
a little switcheroo.

- Cute, love it.
- Right.

- Thanks, Jackie.
- Okay.

Definitely sitting up here.

- Thank you.
- Watch your head, Carrie.

- Ooh!
- Good work.

Oh, she lost
her little crown.

Yeah, that's okay.

[whispering]
Okay.

Yeah... origami.

[door closing]

[Lindsay] Bye!

We need to get rid
of this fucking wine.

- What? Why?
- Because we can't afford it.

- Why?
- Because...

it's $300 a bottle.

- What?
- Yeah.

You said that it was 50.

Because I didn't want you
to get pissed off at me

for spending $300
on a bottle of wine.

So, you lied to me.

I-- no.

No, not doing this right now.
Georges, hi!

Hi, you know what,
I think my wife is

actually the one
who made a mistake here.

We need to return
this wine please.

- Oh, no, we don't do that.
- You don't do what?

We don't do refunds.

- Okay... okay...
- [laughing]

...we're good--
look, hey, hey.

- Yeah?
- I work in sales, okay?

I get it, right? You gotta get
your nut here, right?

Okay, no-no-no-no-no.
I got my nut.

And I got their nut,
and I got your nut,

and I got all your nuts
all over my face, okay?

And we still
don't do refunds.

No, wait, look--
fuck, come on,

- come on, hey, hey, look--
- Jack?

It's still in the box, right?
It's still organic.

Biodynamic.

And overpriced.
You can take this back--

- No, no, that's okay.
- Jack?

- He needs to take this back!
- Jack!

What?

- We have to keep it.
- Why?

Because we said we would
drink it at dinner tonight.

Fuck!

You do not get to be mad
at me about this.

I don't get to be mad
at you about this.

- Don't do that, Jack.
- Do what?

- Don't do the thing.
- What thing?

- The lawyer thing.
- I'm not doing

a lawyer thing, I'm just...
making a counterpoint.

Oh, there it is.

You lied to me.
It's as simple as that.

Okay, um, I'd just argue
that I lied to you

because you're really
embarrassed of me.

I am not embarrassed of you.

I-- mm, see, you want us
to be these people,

and we're just not,
and, like, that's okay.

These people are
miserable and drunks.

They're drunks?

They haven't stopped drinking
since we got here.

- It's her birthday weekend.
- Which she didn't tell you.

Because she didn't want it
to be weird.

We are currently
sitting in a car

that is worth $100,000.

Inside of that car,

there is
$150,000 worth of wine.

This is weird.

[discordant playing]

Hi.

- Hey!
- Hi!

You changed.

Oh, it's murder mystery night.

Milton made it
a Roaring '20s theme.

Oh, um, I just--

I didn't bring
anything to wear.

Oh, that's okay,
Milton took care of it all.

There's some stuff
in your room, go get changed,

and then come back up here
whenever you're ready,

and we're all gonna
go down to the farmhouse.

Okay-- oh,
we brought the wine.

- Wine?
- From, um...

- from the tasting.
- Oh, right!

Great, um, yeah,
you can just put that

downstairs in the cellar
and then go get changed.

We're gonna
kill each other!

- [laughter]
- Hey, Jack, tonight,

why don't you pick on a vase
your own size, see?!

- Argh, ya see?
- [playing low note]

Well, good thing
we bought two.

Okay.

[scoffing]

They know my sizes?
How do they do that?

God, I want a Milton.

- [discordant piano notes]
- [British accent] Listen up!

It seems there be
a murderer in our midst.

- [gasping]
- My name is

Police Chief
Danny O'Sullivan!

And if there's one thing
I won't stand,

it's murderers in Chicago.

- Ooh.
- [Italian accent] Manila!

Now, it seems
that someone's been

feeding me intel
on the inside.

Isn't that right,
Becca Brasco?

Yeah, see?!

Me and my crew,
we've been taking over

the South Side, see?!

When there was one person

standing in our way...

Jack, that's--
that's your turn.

- Yeah, you go.
- It's your turn.

- Read the card.
- I just read it?

- Just read the card.
- Just the card? Okay, um,

Where did these cards
come from?

"I'm Michael O'Malley

"from the south side.
My brother Patrick

- was murdered--"
- Okay, now, Jack, can you

please commit
to the character?

- Do an accent.
- Can you give a--

It's so freeing
when you just read it

- with an accent.
- Okay, yeah, okay.

Okay, um--
[clearing throat]

[high-pitched Irish]
"I'm Michael O'Malley

from the South Side.

My brother Patrick was
murdered.

People think I did it
to take control

of the potato trade,

but that's impossible

because I was
on the north side

with Don Kerryon--"
that's Kerry.

Ahh, that's-ah me!

[overlapping chatter]

"While I was on the north side
with Don Ker-leone!"

True, true, that is true.

Because there's not
one person in this room

that didn't stand to gain
from Patrick's death.

Especially the wife!

[all gasping]

Let's just pick up the cues.

Just pick up
the cues, everyone.

- Seriously, take this.
- Becca was

a Fulbright scholar.
She's completely

wasting her life here.
[laughing]

- Love you, Becky.
- Okay, sorry, Becca.

Total respect.

Yeah, that's embarrassing.

- [clearing throat]
- You got it, babe, go.

- You got it.
- "It couldn't've been me.

I loved my husband.

We immigrated here
together from Kilkenny.

On that ride
across the Atlantic,

we would talk about
the better life

America would show us.

We heard that there are
no cats in America,

and the streets are
made of cheese.

- Is she going off script?
- Yeah, it's brilliant.

"Upon arriving in New York,

- Patrick took me in his--"
- Chicago! Chicago.

"--Chicago, Patrick took me
in his arms and said,

We will never want
for anything again."

And then one of you monsters
murdered him!

[screaming, cheering]

Wow!

[up-tempo rock]

[cheering]

Ooh!

[groaning]

Dude's got cryptocurrency.
Secret currency.

Right? It's just--
it's an idea.

Where do we put the crypto?

In storage.
Is it a fuckin' crypto bank?

- I don't know yet.
- You all right, bud?

I'm just in a dark--
a dark hole right now.

Come here, come here,
come here, come here...

Then come sit,
come sit, come sit.

- [sobbing]
- This is how we come out

the other side.
He goes in here...

- [sobbing]
- Just give it-- watch,

watch, five, four,
three, two, one.

What's up, guys?
All right.

So what you're gonna want
is you're gonna want

cold storage,
cold storage can make it

so it can't be encrypted
by other people.

- That's it right there.
- So you have a passcode

which is gonna break it up...

And the Boner Award...

- [laughter]
- ...for Worst Job

Keeping Their Facts
Straight goes to...

[Cat] Oh, I know
who that is.

Jack!

[overlapping chatter]

Yay, Jack!

- [growling]
- Ah-- ah!

- [laughing]
- Uh-- fuck you.

[all exclaiming]

You have to use that, Jack.

He's a good sport--
and last but not least,

the award
for Finest Performance

goes to...

- Lindsay!
- [all cheering]

Oh, my God!

I would like to thank
all of you, blah-blah-blah,

this is amazing!

Oh, my God, of course
you think Lindz gave

the best performance.

What are you talking about?
Lindz was great.

- Thank you.
- Oh, no, she's amazing.

I-- Becca was--
pfft!-- wet.

But-But Daniel knows Lindz
from high school, so...

She rocked it,
she was in all the plays.

I think he's a little biased.

Wait, high school?

- Yeah.
- Daniel...

Daniel and Lindz went
to high school together.

And they used to,
you know, they used to...

- Cat.
- ...whatever.

- [Carrie] Oh.
- They used to what?

No, well, we just-- we went
to high school together.

It's not a big deal.
You knew that.

I didn't.
I didn't know that, Dan.

Oh... yeah, well...

oh.

[Jack] Dan?

Dan...

Dan, oh...

- you're Dan.
- Yeah, brother.

May I speak to you privately
over there please?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah...

Uh, anybody want

- a refill?
- [Carrie] Blue penis.

- Over here.
- Babe, they called him

Big Dick Dan 'cause
he's very well-endowed.

[laughing]
Oh! Brother Dan's

packing a real
ham cannon, huh?

[Carrie] I see that
for Dan, yeah.

But it's, like, a--
it's like a thing for Jack

because he doesn't have--
well, he's--

'Cause-- 'Cause,
is Jack not packing

- a ham cannon?
- No, he has...

[whispering]
Is that Big Dick Dan?

- Okay, can we just--
- No, yes or no question.

Is that Big Dick Dan?

Yes.

- Yes, it is.
- Okay.

Okay.

I am not going to point out

that you just ripped me
a new asshole in the car

for lying to you
about a bottle of wine.

I-- but you kind of are

by saying that, so...

That is fair.

So I'm not gonna do that.

And I am not
gonna freak out

- now that I have met Dan.
- Which, Jack, honey,

that really was
so long ago.

And it's great that you
wouldn't freak out about it

because it was another person,
it was another time, you know?

- Yeah, yeah, okay.
- Okay.

- Okay, yeah.
- Okay.

So I'm just gonna...

I'm just gonna push this,
like, deep...

deep...

- down inside...
- Okay.

And we are just
gonna deal with this

when we get home, okay?

- Okay. Okay.
- Okay. Okay.

I am so sorry.

Thanks, Cat.
Not your fault.

Actually,
I didn't know that,

but I don't care.

And after hearing about
Daniel and his ham cannon,

I'm probably gonna
have sex with him, too.

Is that okay with you, Ker?

I seriously do not care.

And I'm not judging
anyone here.

That's beautiful, brother.

I mean,
at the end of the day,

it's just sex, right?

Yes, I've had sex
with your wife,

and I've had sex
with Becca.

And it sounds like I'm gonna
have sex with Carrie.

[growling]

And that's awesome.

But what you have, brother,

that's deeper
than penetration.

You have a life.

And I think
it's a great honor

to be bonded like this
to another man.

Look... Lindsay taught me

so much about sex,
and I taught her

a bunch
of cool stuff, too.

And you're still reaping
those benefits today.

So...

thank you.

And you're welcome.

I'm welcome?

Yeah.
I mean, obviously,

we're gonna have
different experiences

because we have
different body types.

You're shorter than I am.

I'm-- are you saying
I'm smaller than you?

Yeah, well,
you're like five--

What the fuck is that

- supposed to mean?
- Jack?

- It's okay, brother.
- --I'm smaller than you?

I'm fucking shorter than you?
No, I'm sorry, I'm sorry,

- this is very--
- Triggering?

Thank you, Ker,
not really the time right now.

- Sounds like we just got--
- Don't touch me, man!

- [all hollering]
- Jack!

I'm sorry, I'm really sorry.
Are you okay?

- Give me that!
- No-- whoa-- no, no!

[overlapping shouting]

Take his power!
Grab it!

[overlapping shouting]

- Time out!
- Careful! Careful!

[overlapping shouting]

Oh! Oh!

Please!
I wanna stop!

I wanna stop!
I wanna stop! Please stop.

- I wanna-- yes!
- Aah.

Well, my thirst for blood
remains unquenched.

Yeah, yeah--
hey, fellas,

this is getting
"hard-on" to watch.

- [laughter]
- I have lower back issues.

Oh, me too, man.

And the winner
of the weirdest fight

in history...
is Jack!

[overlapping cheering]

[groaning]
Oh, God.

- Lindsay?
- Dan?!

You get the fuck
outta here now!

Go upstairs,
go to bed.

Think about
what you did.

Goddamnit.
I'll see you in the morning.

Hey, thank you for
all your hard work tonight,

by the way.
Thank you very much.

[Carrie] I'll see you
upstairs, Dan.

Excellent storytelling.

- That guy's the best.
- Really lovely.

[Cat] That was impressive.

He is the fucking best, man.

[panting]

[soft music]

- Why are you sad?
- Because...

Jack was doing
so much better.

[coughing]
You know?

But he won the fight.

Oh, my God.

He's gonna actually
go to jail.

- Why?
- Because

he assaulted Dan,

and Dan's gonna
press charges.

Oh, no, he won't.

Daniel has signed
multiple NDAs--

[inhaling]
--and he gets asshole tax

every time something
like this happens.

Oh, what is asshole tax?

Daniel and Becca get
an extra ten grand

every time
my husband or a guest

is an asshole.

Wow.

This happens a lot.

- Okay.
- He makes

way too much money
to try to...

- [blows raspberry]
- Yeah.

I'm gonna get my...

my girl.

My girl, Gigi.

- Gigi?
- Yeah.

She is the solution.

- Gigi is the solution?
- She's a witch.

She's a good witch.

[sighing]

I have to go to bed.

[soft music]

- Good night.
- [indistinct]

God, I hate you.

That's okay.
I suck.

Well, you took the fun
right out of that.

Here, let me carry you
to bed, come on.

[groaning]

[sighing]

[sighing]

Oh! Oh!

[both groaning]

Ow, why'd you kick me?

She does that.

- Why were you on the floor?
- I... I guess

I didn't wanna wake
you guys up? I don't...

[door opening]

- Hey, Dan.
- Yeah, brother?

I'm sorry
about last night, man.

No hard feelings, brother.
I'm sorry, too.

[door closing]

"The lady of the house
requests your presence

"in the grace garden
for a healing cacao ceremony

at 10:00 am."

Why is she in our bed?

I don't know, Jack, why?
Do you wanna fight her, too?

No, I don't...

[sobbing]
Fuck!

How do these people
fucking live like this?

- It's--
- Jack--

what the fuck happened
last night?

Jack, grow the fuck up.

You could've gone
to jail again.

- I didn't go--
- I'm going to get coffee.

Hi.

- Good morning.
- Good morning.

Uh, listen, I...

I just wanted to talk to you
about last night.

I'm really sorry,
and I just...

I don't know, I just feel
like it was so--

Very avoidable.

Um...

yeah, yeah, I mean,
I... definitely

could've talked
to Jack sooner.

Or you could've
not told me.

Right.

There's an espresso
if you want coffee.

Okay.

[whirring]

What the fuck?

Oh, goddamnit!

[sighing]

You must be Lindz.

I've heard about you.

I'm sorry,
have we-- have we met?

I'm Gigi.
Catherine's shaman.

I'm really looking
forward to...

healing together today.

Mars...

is the god of war.

Scorpio is
the sign of the self.

[sighing]

You're at war with yourself.

- [whirring]
- But...

we can work on that together.

Today.

[whirring stops]

[chuckling]

See you in the garden.

[soft woodwinds]

[soft woodwinds continue]

[breathing slowly]

I am incredibly honored
to be sitting with you all

in intention today...

at this cacao ceremony.

Please take a moment
to thank yourself...

[all] Thank you.

[Gigi] And please
thank one another

for sharing
this time together.

[all] Thank you.

We are trying to connect
on a deeper level,

on a human level,

so we can see
each other.

We have already created
our sacred space.

We each have our own
individual bowls of cacao.

Take a sip
of the cacao, please,

as you're sitting
with your intention.

This world is
such a crazy place.

So... hectic.

So... ego...ic.

We spend all of this time

traveling
through all these years,

trying to get
to a certain place of hope,

up this hill,
to a destination?

And then we wake up
in the morning,

and we step outside.

We take a deep breath,

or we just--
we get really high.

When we want
to really be yelling,

at the top of our lungs,

"Hey!
What's going on?!"

Wouldn't it be incredible

if you could just turn
to your partner

and say...

"Do you know what I want?
What I really, really want?"

And they could look at you,
and they would know

exactly what you want,
what you really,

really wanted,
because it's a safe space.

And you could tell them,

without any stuttering,
no "I want, uh,

I may want, uh--"

You know what you really,
really want.

They know.

You both want to be...

friends.

Possibly lovers.

But you wanna be seen.

Yes? Yes.

- [Carrie] Yes.
- [inhaling]

[exhaling]

Please take another sip
of the cacao.

Please repeat after me.

I love you.
I'm sorry.

Please forgive me.

[both] I love you.
I'm sorry.

Please forgive me.

I love you. I'm sorry.
Please forgive me.

[both] I love you.
I'm sorry.

Please forgive me.

I love you. I'm sorry.
Please forgive me.

[both] I love you.
I'm sorry.

- Please forgive me.
- Again!

[all] I love you.
I'm sorry.

- Please forgive me.
- Again!

[all] I love you.
I'm sorry.

Please forgive me.

[Gigi] Thank you.

Now that we are done
with the cacao ceremony,

I would like to invite
you all to take a moment

to dance with me
in intention.

[didgeridoo and drums]

Yes.

Think about your heart.

What is it feeling?
Is it a give?

Is it a take?
Are you taking too much?

Do not be shy.

Explore what love
means for you.

Nothing is wrong,
everything is right.

We're not dancing,
love is moving us.

Incredible.

Powerful group here.

Be intentional.
This is what I wanna see.

Are you guys feeling this?
I am just so overcome

with the whirlwind of love

[soft music]

Mmm...

so, let's continue.

From the front
of the house are...

- The pinot.
- Pinot which?

- Noir.
- Good.

Good, good, good.

And what's
behind the house?

- The shiraz.
- Very close.

It's actually syrah.

But you know
what's kind of funny?

- It's the same thing.
- What?

Shiraz is just...

Australian syrah,
but the French don't like

the Australians,
so they were like,

[French accent]
no, you can--

you can call it "syrah,"
and they were like,

[Australian accent]
"Well, what do we call it?"

And they were like,
"You call it

whatever you want,
but not syrah,"

and they were like,
"Fine, we'll...

we'll call it shiraz."

[laughter]

It's the same thing
as sauvi B and Saint Cyr,

it's just a marketing
question, you know?

Yeah...

- Oh, man.
- You are great, man.

- Thanks, man.
- No, like,

I cannot wait
to get to know you better.

When are we gonna do that?

You know, with Cat
and Lindsay working together,

we may hang out
all the time.

- They are?
- Yeah, remember?

At brunch, she said
you'd fund the thing.

Oh, my God, so much has
happened this weekend.

- I know.
- What's the company?

Sustainable
clothing something.

Oh, that's a pretty good idea.

Can I hit you
with a truth bomb?

Blow it up.

Don't let Lindz...

get involved with Cat.

And don't-- And don't
you get involved

with Cat, either.

- Why?
- [sighing]

Cat is my wife

and my raison d'etre

and my light
and my path forward,

and all of that,
so if she ever hears

that I said this,
I will deny it to the hill,

then I'll say
that you were fucked up

and made it up, but...

Cat's kind of a...

an experience hoarder.

And she loves to feel
like a patron

of the arts.

Like a de' Medici from Italy
in the Renaissance,

but this is
the problem, right?

Is that she holds on
to these experiences,

and if you try to take 'em
away, she's like,

"No! This is my stuff!"

And she forgets
that there's people

on the other end
of those experiences,

and those people inevitably
end up on the...

on the trash pile
of her hoard.

And I don't want that
to happen to you and Lindz.

I mean, just--
let me just-- let me just

throw something out at you
here, do you know that,

last year,
I was funding

three nonprofit
theater companies in Astoria,

one alpaca farm
in Argentina...

and two equestrian academies

in Atlanta and Austin,

and that--
that was just because

she liked the A sounds
back to back.

- It's called assonance.
- Really?

Yeah.

Fuck, there is a word
for everything.

But this is
what I'm saying, okay?

Cat doesn't follow through.

All of those businesses
I just mentioned?

Guess where they are.

- I don't know.
- [imitates booming]

That-- That's them
not existing.

They don't exist anymore.
They all went under

because Cat got bored
with them.

Yeah.

Cat thinks
I lack compassion.

But she only thinks that

because I make
so much money.

Just because
I make a lot of money

does not therefore mean
I lack compassion, right?

Right, Jack?
I need you to say "right."

- Yeah, right, no.
- [sighing]

My biggest fear is that

Cat's only with me
because I make

such a fuckton of money.

- Fuck.
- Does that sound

like somebody
who lacks compassion?

No, I think you feel
a lot of stuff.

Thank you.
Thank you, yes.

- I do.
- Can I--

Can I tell you something?

God, I wish you would.

I'm afraid Lindsay's
gonna leave me

because I don't
make enough money.

That's like
the yin to my yang.

She wants me
to ask you about a job.

Do you want a job?

I don't know,
doing what?

Well, what do you wanna do?

I don't know what I wanna do.

Then why would
I have a job for you, my man?

You know?

My advice--
My advice, Jack,

you just-- you figure out
what you wanna do.

And you go do it.

[Lindsay] We're not
really silly anymore.

We're not silly people.
We're so serious.

[Cat] Daniel,
I'm sorry,

but your-- your fingers
feel like worms,

and if we just take
a quick little break--

I feel like I'm getting
buried in the dirt.

- Absolutely.
- Thanks, Becca.

- Ugh, Lindz...
- Hmm?

not to be serious, but...

we gotta talk
about the line.

[gasping]
Yes.

Okay, okay:
local, sustainable.

Local, sustainable,
and, yeah, I'm, like,

I'm thinking about, like,
textures and patterns.

- Mm.
- And... choreography

and rhythms and emotions
and thoughts.

Well, hemp is overdone.

- Completely.
- Mm-hmm.

- Couldn't agree more.
- Something strong.

Yeah, strong like, um...

- trees-- mm.
- Mm.

Could we make it
out of bark?

I don't know that
I've seen that done before.

Mm-mm... hmm.

You're right, yeah,
no, that's a--

- that's a bad idea.
- [laughter]

That one was
the mushrooms.

- [laughing]
- I may have gotten

too much mushrooms.

- Too much mushrooms.
- Too much.

- Wait, what?
- Too much.

We were supposed
to micro-dose.

- Micro-dose?
- Mm, yeah.

That's where you do, like,
a little bit of...

a little bit of mushrooms
over a sustained period

so you--
you don't get, like,

super fucked-up,
you just become, sort of,

enlightened and...

We all micro-dosed
on mushrooms?

- Yes.
- When?

Um... since
dinner on Friday.

So, all weekend?

Well, I don't...
no, not, like, all weekend.

- Friday?
- It was...

in the mung bean bowls
on Friday,

and then the...

the bloody marys
and the BBQ.

- And today?
- And just now

- at the cacao.
- So all weekend.

- Lindz...
- [laughing]

How dare you.

- [laughing]
- How dare you incept

my mind with your time?

What is...
time is crazy.

Oh, my God.

Sorry I didn't
even realize that

we were at the end
of the weekend.

- We're on drugs?
- Oh, I feel bad.

Yes.
[laughing]

- We are.
- Oh, my God, no.

I'm having a bad moment.

Oh, no-no-no,
no-no-no.

Let's "sprin"--
spin this straw into gold.

No, Jack said
we couldn't do drugs.

Jack said we couldn't do--
Jack can't do drugs.

He actually can do them
pretty well.

No, no, like,
he can't do them, like,

he gets drug tested.

- Oh.
- Yeah.

- What a twist.
- [laughing]

No, no--
don't worry about it,

Gigi has a guy that's--
it'll all get sorted out.

- We'll take care of it.
- Oh, my God, no,

but he has a guy,
he has a-- he has a guy,

his name is Doug,
and it's his officer.

It's his-- It's his...
"he's in trouble" person.

He has to make sure
he's not in trouble.

He--
[laughing]

Doug is so irrelevant
in this story.

I can't even--
I can't even tell you

how much you don't have
to worry about Doug.

I don't understand,
and the bad feeling is

- not going away.
- No-no-no-no-no.

We're above that-- in fact,
we were doing ayahuasca

with Elon and Grimes

right before
they had the baby,

- A-Ash-12-17-50,000...
- I think...

I think I--
I need to go.

- Jackie.
- Oh, my God.

- Hi.
- Hi.

- Okay.
- Okay, yeah,

Doug, yeah,
this is not a thing.

Are you feeling okay?

Yeah, no,
I just-- I'm...

I'm, like, dehydrated

or... something.

Honestly, I've felt off,
like, all day.

It's been...

yeah, it's been
an emotional day.

[laughing]

That's... That's
an understatement, yeah.

- Um... I...
- So...

- No, did you...
- No, what were you gonna say?

- You wanna?
- No, what were you gonna say?

- You sure?
- Yeah, no, go.

Yeah, okay,
I was... you know,

I was hanging out
with Matt by the pool,

and we were--
we were talking.

Oh, my gosh, were you guys
talking about work?

In a very-- yeah, like,
in a roundabout way.

Jack!
That's incredible.

You working with Matt,
and me working with Cat.

This is...
This is really exciting.

Like, this could
actually happen.

This-- This could be our life.

Right?

Look, this--
this isn't real, though.

Okay, Jack,
this is the thing, though.

This is the thing that you do
when you are not accepting

an invitation to upgrade

because you're scared
to take a leap.

I don't know what you're
talking about right now.

I just...
wanna do it

my way,
for once.

Um, taking money
from a stranger

isn't doing it your way.

She's not a stranger.

I'm kind of offended that
you think it's taking money.

She's investing in me.

She believes in me.

Could you try maybe
taking a note from Cat?

Maybe a, "Hey, Lindsay,
you're really talented.

"Hey, I would love
to support you.

"Hey, I think
you're worth it.

Hey, this could be
really good for us."

No, okay. Okay.

- Lindsay?
- No, it's fine.

Lindsay? Lindsay?

I love you.
We don't know them.

And you don't know
how to run a business,

so getting into business
with these people,

it's like--
that's a terrible idea.

You are not...

physically, mentally,

and emotionally capable
of running a business.

I'm not either, so, like,
taking money from someone--

Hey, Jack?

Please stop.

[sighing]

[door opening]

Dinner's almost ready.

- Great, thank you.
- Great.

You guys doing good?
You look great.

- Thanks, see you at dinner.
- Okay.

Okay, I wasn't listening.

[Matt] No, but the really

fucked-up thing is,
do you know how much

I paid Dan this year?

Like, $250,000.

And that's on top
of his salary.

- That's not the salary.
- [Cat sighing]

Milton's asked that
we all meet down at the barn

for the weekend finale.

But, hey-- hey, hey!

But first I just want
to quickly express again

my deep and sincere
appreciation

to each
and every one of you

for opening
yourselves up to...

- Blah-blah-blah-blah...
- ...to each other.

- Let's get weird!
- Let's get it!

Fuck it,
let's get weird, Carrie.

Let's fucking get weird.

[droning synths]

[all cheering]

Everybody put
your fucking headphones on!

[up-tempo synth music]

Why do you look so bored?

Ugh, I'm not bored,
I'm just...

Drink.

I can't drink champagne
right now.

Just have
a glass of champagne.

I don't wanna
drink champagne right now.

Please, just one,
it'll be the best night ever.

I'm sorry, I just--
I'm so mad at Jack right now.

If you don't have
one glass of champagne,

I will literally
kill myself.

I swear to God, I will jump
right out of that window

like the Kool-Aid Man.

I will eat an entire box
of Tide Pods.

I will drink
an entire bottle of bleach.

Daniel, hit me
with the bleach!

It's happening.

I will drink a sip.

Good girl.

That a baby!

Let's show these fuckers
how to dance!

[slow beat]

- Hi.
- Hey.

- Could I get a water?
- Yeah!

Take those headphones off.

- Oh-- [laughing]
- [music stops]

- can I get a water?
- Yeah.

- There you go.
- Wow, you are flying.

Mmm.

You guys are
really feeling it already.

- Yeah.
- They wanted us to break

the pills in half,
but they were just...

too hard, so we just
plopped them right in.

[laughing]
What?

- The pills.
- In the champagne.

Yeah, double-stack
Cadillacs.

- [whooshing]
- Waah!

- [laughing]
- [indistinct]

- Oh, shit.
- [Becca] Uh-oh.

Okay.

- Hey.
- Hey.

Hi, hi...

[sighing]
...that is wild.

Uh-huh.
Hey, can I talk--

can I talk to you
for a second?

Yeah, let's...
let's connect.

- Okay.
- You are so soft.

- Oh, thank you.
- Your skin is so soft.

We don't touch enough.

- I know.
- We used to touch more.

- I love you too.
- I love you so much.

- I love you so much.
- I love you.

- I feel amazing--
- Hey, Jack?

--right now, yes, Lindsay.

- I know.
- I feel amazing, I love--

- Listen to me.
- Yeah.

That's because
we're on molly.

What?

It was in the champagne.

We were also
on mushrooms all day.

- What?!
- Yeah, it was in the cacao.

- The chocolate?
- Uh-huh.

And a couple
of other things.

- Okay, okay, okay.
- Just breathe.

- I can't do drugs.
- No, I think it's a little

- too late, though.
- [sighing]

All of these people
drugged us?

Fuck them!
Fuck them so fucking hard!

- Fuck you!
- Jack!

I need you
to calm down, okay?

- You need to breathe.
- Okay.

I see the dragon coming.

And I want you
to stay with me,

and I want you to look
in me, in my eyes.

Okay? I told her
that you can't do drugs.

- I can't do drugs.
- And it's okay

- because Cat has a guy.
- Cat has a guy,

- Yeah.
- Well, I mean,

it's not Cat's guy,
it's-- Gigi has a guy.

And there's
something about Elon.

- Elon?
- Yeah.

It's okay because
she has a podcast--

A-- what the fuck are
you talking about

- right now?
- No, listen to me, I'm just--

these people do this,
it's like, it happens

in little doses,
and listen,

I just need everything
to be cool because--

Well, I can't be cool
right now, Lindsey,

I'm on drugs,
I can't be cool right now!

Okay, please--
please stop yelling.

- You're making a scene.
- I'm sorry that

I'm making a scene in front
of these fucking people

who are trying
to ruin our lives.

- Oh, my God.
- These fucking people

you've known
for ten fucking days!

These people?
These people? Jack,

Jesus Christ, are you even
listening to yourself?

You just keep
repeating yourself,

over and over
and over again!

You keep saying
the same stupid shit,

and you keep wearing
the same stupid shit,

and you keep
watching the same

stupid shit,
and you keep being this...

shitty version
of yourself,

and I keep waiting
for you to change,

and you're not changing,
and I just--

I understand
that you fell down,

and I just need you--
I need you

to get back up, okay?

And I know
that you blame me.

- I don't blame you...
- You do.

- I don't blame you.
- Listen to me.

I understand

that you're angry,
but I need you

to get back up.

Because this person
believes in me.

- Cat believes in you?
- Yes.

I don't believe in you
but Cat believes in you?

We're here because
your friend Cat

- believes in you? Yeah?
- Yes, Jack!

She is my friend.
Why else would we be here?

Because they're
fucking rich, Lindsay.

That's it.
They beckoned.

We fucking came, okay?
And your friend Cat?

You just wanna be her.

She fucking sucks.

She's mean,
and she's manipulative,

and she's a fucking bully,
and these people--

they're not your friends.

All right?
We are entertainment to them.

They think the way
we live our life is funny.

They think the way I dress
is fucking funny.

Okay? I understand
that I am not

giving you
what you want in life,

and I'm sorry,
but, like,

- this isn't us.
- [sighing]

We are not gonna have
this life ever.

Well, then maybe
I don't want our life anymore.

No, no, no.
What does that mean?

I don't know.

No, I love you.
These people don't love you.

I love you.
I love you.

- Jack.
- I love you.

- Look at me, I love you.
- I hear you.

But you were
just yelling at me.

And I'm going outside.

Lindsay.

Savage, bro.

Fuck you, Kerry.

That's fair.
[chuckling]

♪ Happy Birthday to me ♪

Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.

I am so sorry.
I am so embarrassed.

I am mortified,
Jack just...

- Oh, Lindz, Lindsay--
- I can't believe

- he said those things.
- I-- honestly, I loved it.

I loved it.

- What?
- Nobody ever has

the balls to talk to me
like that.

Like, we pay them too much.

Even Matt is
terrified of me,

which I love.

But it also makes me sad.

But, like, I'm not
the only one who's sad

and fucked up,
you know?

Like, I-- yeah,
I'm an alcoholic.

My husband's a workaholic.

Your husband is insecure.

You lack purpose.

But so do I, that's...

that's why
I'm an alcoholic.

It gives me
something to do.

- No.
- We're like a clown car

on the way
to a Chris Gaines concert.

- No.
- Look at us.

No-- no!

It's like,
God, I just...

I just wanted
not to be us for,

like, a minute.

- Do you know what I mean?
- How'd that go?

- [sighing]
- My husband's

rolling his face off,
and he just screamed at me.

I saw that.
I loved that.

For me-- not--
I didn't love that for you.

That must have been
really embarrassing.

- Yeah.
- Gosh.

It was.

I'm...

I'm trying to work
on my empathy.

Did I pass the test?

Hey, sorry
that you thought that

I had an answer
or something--

somehow the missing piece
in your heart.

Most of me is missing,
to be honest.

It doesn't make any sense

'cause I have everything
that I ever wanted,

and I'm... not happy.

I have a hot husband,

and I have
two beautiful children,

and I have...

12 properties.

Money doesn't fix
your problems, babe.

It just makes them prettier.

Oh! Okay.

Should I write a book?

Should I be a poet?

Should we smash
John Mayer's guitar, um--

- That's John Mayer's guitar?
- Yes!

It's John Mayer's guitar.

He left it here,
and he clearly didn't want it.

Oh, my God!

- Stop! Stop!
- [chuckling]

Whoo!

What the fuck are you doing?

Um, living?

Let me live, okay?

Should I call Milton

and have him bring us
some snacks?

We're having fun.

Milton!

I'm going to bed.

Bye.

Milton!

[soft rock]

[soft sigh]

I'm sorry.

I'm really--
I'm just really sorry.

Jack, stop.

I'm really...

unhappy.

I know, and I'm really...

I'm really sorry,
and I...

It's not your fault.

It's nobody's fault.

[sighing]

I'm really fucking intimidated
by these people.

I don't want to be
these people.

[whispering]
I love you.

I'm sorry.

Please forgive me.

You're such a fucking dick.

[both laughing]

Take a sip of the cacao.

[Cat] Daniel!

My God, can we please get
the fuck out of here?

- Yes, yes,
- Okay.

Get your shit, go!

There's still no service.

We'll figure it out.

We'll figure it out.

[soft guitar]

You know what?
I'm gonna throw in

an extra case
for you guys.

- Hey.
- Thank you.

Yeah, just because
I feel like we're connecting

on a wine level.

You know, 'cause
I see people's

- wine spirits.
- Which one am I?

Oh...
[inhaling]

[chuckling]

The joy. The joy,
it kind of says to me,

just, like, viognier.

- You know what I mean?
- Yeah, Kerry's

- kind of effervescent.
- Thank you.

Effervescent's kind of
a strong word for viognier.

- [laughing]
- You know, okay?

But that's--
that's just really

between us wine people.