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Previously onYoung Sheldon...Why do you look like
you're gonna cry?
2
00:00:04,265 --> 00:00:07,224
A year ago, I was a TV
weather girl in San Antonio,
3
00:00:07,268 --> 00:00:09,792
and now I'm living in a
garage with the 17-year-old
4
00:00:09,835 --> 00:00:10,923
who got me pregnant.
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00:00:10,967 --> 00:00:12,795
I'll be 18 before you know it.
6
00:00:12,838 --> 00:00:14,492
But not before you're a father!
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00:00:14,536 --> 00:00:16,538
It's gonna be okay.
8
00:00:16,581 --> 00:00:17,713
[sniffles, exhales]
9
00:00:17,756 --> 00:00:19,106
Is it?
10
00:00:19,149 --> 00:00:21,804
[whispers]:
I peed in the sink last night.
11
00:00:21,847 --> 00:00:22,805
[squeaks]
12
00:00:22,848 --> 00:00:24,937
Trust me. I'll fix this.
13
00:00:24,981 --> 00:00:26,591
Make yourself at home.
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00:00:26,635 --> 00:00:28,811
Oh. Thank you so much.
15
00:00:28,854 --> 00:00:30,465
It's only temporary. I promise.
16
00:00:30,508 --> 00:00:31,988
Oh. No problem.
17
00:00:32,032 --> 00:00:33,468
Stay as long as you need.
18
00:00:33,511 --> 00:00:34,860
Bathroom's right down the hall.
19
00:00:34,904 --> 00:00:36,819
Oh, boy, a bathroom.
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00:00:39,300 --> 00:00:40,475
MEEMAW:
Here you go--
21
00:00:40,518 --> 00:00:42,825
scrambled eggs, bacon,
22
00:00:42,868 --> 00:00:46,829
biscuits and fresh-squeezed
orange juice.
23
00:00:46,872 --> 00:00:48,700
Thank you. Looks amazing.
24
00:00:48,744 --> 00:00:49,832
Where's mine?
25
00:00:49,875 --> 00:00:51,138
You're not pregnant. She is.
26
00:00:51,181 --> 00:00:53,705
Well, I like to think
we're pregnant.
27
00:00:54,445 --> 00:00:55,664
Really?
28
00:00:55,707 --> 00:00:57,057
Are your ankles swollen?
29
00:00:57,100 --> 00:00:58,580
Did you throw up this morning?
30
00:00:58,623 --> 00:00:59,842
Are you constipated?
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00:00:59,885 --> 00:01:00,973
No, dear.
32
00:01:01,017 --> 00:01:02,236
Stop calling me "dear."
33
00:01:02,279 --> 00:01:03,367
I'm not your dear.
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00:01:03,411 --> 00:01:04,194
You want
breakfast,
35
00:01:04,238 --> 00:01:05,413
eggs are here,
36
00:01:05,456 --> 00:01:06,414
stove is there.
37
00:01:06,457 --> 00:01:07,545
Knock yourself out.
38
00:01:07,589 --> 00:01:08,633
I get she's pregnant.
39
00:01:08,677 --> 00:01:09,982
I don't know why
you're so moody.
40
00:01:10,026 --> 00:01:11,723
On the count of three...
41
00:01:11,767 --> 00:01:13,856
I'm leaving, I'm leaving.
42
00:01:13,899 --> 00:01:15,379
Have a good day, Mama.
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00:01:15,423 --> 00:01:17,294
Ugh. "Mama."
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00:01:17,338 --> 00:01:20,210
♪ Nobody else
is stronger than I am ♪
45
00:01:20,254 --> 00:01:22,952
♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain
46
00:01:22,995 --> 00:01:25,520
♪ I bet I could be your hero
47
00:01:25,563 --> 00:01:28,218
♪ I am a mighty little man
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00:01:28,262 --> 00:01:32,701
♪ I am a mighty little man.♪
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00:01:35,356 --> 00:01:37,009
ADULT SHELDON:
Since losing his job,
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00:01:37,053 --> 00:01:39,142
one of the few upsides
for my dad
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00:01:39,186 --> 00:01:42,624
was having the house to himself
to enjoy some peace and quiet.
52
00:01:42,667 --> 00:01:44,147
BRENDA: Billy!
53
00:01:44,191 --> 00:01:46,584
Stop feeding the chickens
Cap'n Crunch!
54
00:01:46,628 --> 00:01:48,412
BILLY: But they like it.We've been over this.
55
00:01:48,456 --> 00:01:51,241
You don't eat their food,
they don't eat yours.
56
00:01:51,285 --> 00:01:53,591
Everything okay over there?
57
00:01:54,636 --> 00:01:55,506
Yeah.
58
00:01:55,550 --> 00:01:57,204
Doesn't sound okay.
59
00:01:57,247 --> 00:01:59,467
Oh. You don't want to know.
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00:01:59,510 --> 00:02:00,990
Tell me.
61
00:02:03,166 --> 00:02:04,820
He's failing math,
62
00:02:04,863 --> 00:02:06,126
and they might hold him back.
63
00:02:06,169 --> 00:02:07,823
That's rough.
64
00:02:07,866 --> 00:02:10,826
I try helping him, but math
was never my strong suit.
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00:02:10,869 --> 00:02:12,262
Yeah, I hear ya.
66
00:02:12,306 --> 00:02:13,698
And when you do try to
help 'em, they realize
67
00:02:13,742 --> 00:02:14,830
how dumb you are.
68
00:02:14,873 --> 00:02:16,788
You think...
69
00:02:16,832 --> 00:02:18,399
Sheldon would help Billy?
70
00:02:18,442 --> 00:02:21,924
[sighs] I'm not sure helping
others is where he shines.
71
00:02:21,967 --> 00:02:24,318
Pissing 'em off--
he's got that down cold.
72
00:02:25,188 --> 00:02:27,234
Well, then I'm screwed.
73
00:02:27,277 --> 00:02:29,018
I can't afford a tutor.
74
00:02:30,193 --> 00:02:31,629
Let me talk to Sheldon,
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00:02:31,673 --> 00:02:32,717
see what I can do.
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00:02:32,761 --> 00:02:34,719
Appreciate it.
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00:02:34,763 --> 00:02:36,025
BILLY: Mom, look!
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00:02:37,113 --> 00:02:39,942
That chicken is not a hat!
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00:02:39,985 --> 00:02:41,900
Hurry.
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00:02:45,121 --> 00:02:45,991
Hey. How was school?
81
00:02:46,035 --> 00:02:47,384
Sucked.
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00:02:47,428 --> 00:02:48,516
Language.
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00:02:48,559 --> 00:02:49,778
You asked, and it did.
84
00:02:49,821 --> 00:02:50,866
What happened?
85
00:02:50,909 --> 00:02:52,476
I don't want to talk about it.
86
00:02:52,520 --> 00:02:53,347
Are you sure?
87
00:02:53,390 --> 00:02:55,044
I'm a pretty good listener.
88
00:02:55,087 --> 00:02:57,655
Then why didn't you hear me say
I don't want to talk about it?
89
00:02:57,699 --> 00:03:00,180
Is this about a boy?Mom.
90
00:03:00,223 --> 00:03:02,965
I-I do have some experience
on the subject.
91
00:03:03,008 --> 00:03:04,793
Please, the only two boys
you have experience with
92
00:03:04,836 --> 00:03:06,621
are Dad and Jesus.
93
00:03:06,664 --> 00:03:08,188
I'm gonna go talk to Meemaw.
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00:03:09,580 --> 00:03:11,669
I know other boys.
95
00:03:11,713 --> 00:03:14,237
And then he walked right on
by me like I wasn't there.
96
00:03:14,281 --> 00:03:16,239
Does he even know you like him?
97
00:03:16,283 --> 00:03:18,850
I don't know. I've ignored him,
been mean to him.
98
00:03:18,894 --> 00:03:20,287
What else can I do?
99
00:03:20,330 --> 00:03:23,203
Sounds like you've
tried everything.
100
00:03:23,246 --> 00:03:24,856
Okay.
101
00:03:24,900 --> 00:03:26,554
I've got an idea.
102
00:03:26,597 --> 00:03:27,990
Why don't you just tell him?
103
00:03:28,033 --> 00:03:29,644
But what if he
doesn't like me back?
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00:03:29,687 --> 00:03:30,688
I would die.
105
00:03:30,732 --> 00:03:32,124
You will not die.
106
00:03:32,168 --> 00:03:33,952
Oh, yes, I will.
I will be dead,
107
00:03:33,996 --> 00:03:35,345
and you will be sad
at my funeral.
108
00:03:35,389 --> 00:03:36,651
How about this--
109
00:03:36,694 --> 00:03:38,348
why don't you get
one of your girlfriends
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00:03:38,392 --> 00:03:40,263
to find out
how he feels about you.
111
00:03:40,307 --> 00:03:43,440
Why?Because then you don't have
to put yourself on the spot.
112
00:03:43,484 --> 00:03:46,138
Okay. And if he
doesn't like me back,
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00:03:46,182 --> 00:03:48,053
I'll just keep being mean
to him until he does.
114
00:03:48,924 --> 00:03:49,968
I don't know why that works.
115
00:03:50,012 --> 00:03:51,318
Men are dumb.
116
00:03:51,361 --> 00:03:53,363
Does that mean
we're dumb for liking 'em?
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00:03:54,234 --> 00:03:57,367
It's not a good look for us.
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00:04:01,328 --> 00:04:02,677
[knocking]You busy?
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00:04:02,720 --> 00:04:04,156
Yes, but I'm also excellent
120
00:04:04,200 --> 00:04:06,811
at bifurcating
my cognitive abilities. Hit me.
121
00:04:06,855 --> 00:04:08,073
[sighs]
122
00:04:08,117 --> 00:04:10,293
Billy is struggling with math,
and, mm,
123
00:04:10,337 --> 00:04:12,382
his mom was hoping
that you could tutor him.
124
00:04:12,426 --> 00:04:13,340
I could.
125
00:04:13,383 --> 00:04:14,341
Great.
126
00:04:14,384 --> 00:04:15,167
But I won't.
127
00:04:15,211 --> 00:04:16,560
Why not?
128
00:04:16,604 --> 00:04:18,345
Because me teaching Billy
is like trying to use
129
00:04:18,388 --> 00:04:19,911
the gravitational power
of a neutron star
130
00:04:19,955 --> 00:04:21,696
to change the spin of a boson.
131
00:04:21,739 --> 00:04:23,567
Don't do that.
132
00:04:23,611 --> 00:04:25,134
If he doesn't pass math,
133
00:04:25,177 --> 00:04:26,614
they're gonna hold him back.
134
00:04:26,657 --> 00:04:27,789
That's the system working.
135
00:04:27,832 --> 00:04:29,225
Very Darwinian.
136
00:04:30,008 --> 00:04:31,488
Yeah. Never mind.
137
00:04:31,532 --> 00:04:33,621
Yeah, I told Brenda teaching
wasn't really your thing.
138
00:04:34,578 --> 00:04:35,840
Well, it's not that
I can't do it.
139
00:04:35,884 --> 00:04:36,928
Don't worry about it.
140
00:04:36,972 --> 00:04:38,234
You're good at a lot of things.
141
00:04:38,278 --> 00:04:39,670
Teaching just ain't one of 'em.
142
00:04:39,714 --> 00:04:42,282
I know what you're doing.
It's reverse psychology.
143
00:04:42,325 --> 00:04:43,631
I don't know what
you're talking about.
144
00:04:43,674 --> 00:04:46,068
It's childish and obvious.
145
00:04:46,111 --> 00:04:48,157
So you'll do it?Yes, I'll do it.
146
00:04:49,027 --> 00:04:50,638
Thanks for the pie.
147
00:04:50,681 --> 00:04:53,293
Mandy keeps bringing all
these leftovers from the diner.
148
00:04:53,336 --> 00:04:56,426
[chuckles]Well, she's lucky to have you.
149
00:04:56,470 --> 00:04:57,601
[softly]:
Mm-hmm.
150
00:04:57,645 --> 00:04:59,299
And Missy, too.
151
00:05:00,038 --> 00:05:01,866
Lucky, lucky.
152
00:05:01,910 --> 00:05:04,347
Oh, it's killing you, isn't it?
153
00:05:04,391 --> 00:05:05,653
What? No.
154
00:05:05,696 --> 00:05:06,697
I...
155
00:05:06,741 --> 00:05:08,090
I am happy
156
00:05:08,133 --> 00:05:11,659
that she has an adult
she can confide in
157
00:05:11,702 --> 00:05:14,009
about...
[sputters softly]
158
00:05:15,532 --> 00:05:17,621
Come on. Just tell me.
159
00:05:17,665 --> 00:05:19,406
I would.
160
00:05:19,449 --> 00:05:23,366
But the bond between a girl
and her grandmother is...
161
00:05:23,410 --> 00:05:24,498
sacred.
162
00:05:24,541 --> 00:05:27,152
I am her mother
and I am your daughter.
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00:05:27,196 --> 00:05:28,632
Give me something.
164
00:05:28,676 --> 00:05:29,981
[sighs]
165
00:05:30,025 --> 00:05:31,809
It's just boy stuff, okay?
166
00:05:31,853 --> 00:05:33,071
[exhales]
167
00:05:33,115 --> 00:05:34,986
That she'd rather
talk to you about.
168
00:05:35,030 --> 00:05:36,118
That's right.
169
00:05:36,161 --> 00:05:38,250
[sighing groan]
170
00:05:39,382 --> 00:05:40,340
There you go.
171
00:05:41,166 --> 00:05:43,255
Eat those feelings.
172
00:05:43,299 --> 00:05:45,127
All right, I'm given
to understand you have
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00:05:45,170 --> 00:05:47,564
a test coming up on
negative numbers and fractions.
174
00:05:47,608 --> 00:05:48,870
Yeah.
175
00:05:48,913 --> 00:05:51,263
So, what part
don't you understand?
176
00:05:53,962 --> 00:05:55,267
Oh, boy.
177
00:05:55,311 --> 00:05:56,617
Let's take it back a step.
178
00:05:56,660 --> 00:05:58,183
Where do you stand
on addition, subtraction,
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00:05:58,227 --> 00:05:59,881
multiplication and division?
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00:05:59,924 --> 00:06:01,839
I'm against it.
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00:06:01,883 --> 00:06:03,188
[exhales]
182
00:06:03,232 --> 00:06:04,799
[quietly]:
Oh, boy.
183
00:06:05,626 --> 00:06:06,757
Hope you like tuna salad.
184
00:06:06,801 --> 00:06:08,019
I brought you a whole tub.
185
00:06:08,063 --> 00:06:09,456
How old is it?
186
00:06:09,499 --> 00:06:11,501
I don't know,
but the clock's ticking.
187
00:06:11,545 --> 00:06:13,416
Meemaw?
188
00:06:13,460 --> 00:06:14,635
Uh-oh.
189
00:06:14,678 --> 00:06:15,679
We need to talk.
190
00:06:15,723 --> 00:06:16,637
Hi.
191
00:06:16,680 --> 00:06:18,160
Hi.What's going on?
192
00:06:18,203 --> 00:06:20,031
I told Heather
that I liked Kevin
193
00:06:20,075 --> 00:06:22,077
so she could find out
if he liked me back.
194
00:06:22,120 --> 00:06:23,687
Then she asked him out.
195
00:06:23,731 --> 00:06:24,993
What?She didn't even think
196
00:06:25,036 --> 00:06:26,821
he was cute
until I said I liked him.
197
00:06:26,864 --> 00:06:27,996
Well, why'd
you tell her?
198
00:06:28,039 --> 00:06:29,127
She told me to.
199
00:06:29,171 --> 00:06:30,390
'Cause that's
how you find out
200
00:06:30,433 --> 00:06:31,956
if somebody likes you
in school.
201
00:06:32,000 --> 00:06:34,698
That's o-one way.
202
00:06:34,742 --> 00:06:36,134
Why? What would you have done?
203
00:06:36,178 --> 00:06:39,094
Uh, well, you put him
on Heather's radar
204
00:06:39,137 --> 00:06:40,356
when you said
you liked him.
205
00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:42,010
I probably would
have dropped a note
206
00:06:42,053 --> 00:06:44,012
in his locker or asked
one of his guy friends.
207
00:06:44,055 --> 00:06:45,622
That makes so much more sense.
208
00:06:46,362 --> 00:06:47,581
Why didn't you tell me that?
209
00:06:47,624 --> 00:06:48,756
I gave you good advice.
210
00:06:48,799 --> 00:06:50,845
It's not my fault
Heather sucks.
211
00:06:50,888 --> 00:06:52,716
[scoffs]
So what do I do now?
212
00:06:52,760 --> 00:06:53,891
Well, the first thing...
213
00:06:53,935 --> 00:06:55,110
I was talking to her.
214
00:07:00,985 --> 00:07:02,944
Okay, your basic
arithmetic skills
215
00:07:02,987 --> 00:07:04,859
are disappointing
but functional.
216
00:07:04,902 --> 00:07:05,468
Thank you.
217
00:07:06,251 --> 00:07:08,036
All right, let's talk
about negative numbers.
218
00:07:08,079 --> 00:07:09,298
I'm all ear.
219
00:07:09,341 --> 00:07:10,342
"Ears."
220
00:07:10,386 --> 00:07:11,866
No. "Ear."
221
00:07:11,909 --> 00:07:13,389
This one's clogged.
222
00:07:13,433 --> 00:07:15,173
Right. Okay.
223
00:07:15,217 --> 00:07:18,046
Negative numbers are numbers
that are less than zero.
224
00:07:18,089 --> 00:07:19,874
But zero's nothing.Yes.
225
00:07:19,917 --> 00:07:22,050
So how can you have
less than nothing?
226
00:07:22,093 --> 00:07:23,225
Let's see.
227
00:07:23,268 --> 00:07:24,487
How about this?
228
00:07:24,531 --> 00:07:26,533
If you have a dollar,
that's one.
229
00:07:26,576 --> 00:07:28,709
If you have no dollars,
that's zero.
230
00:07:28,752 --> 00:07:30,972
But if you owe me a dollar,
that's negative one.
231
00:07:31,015 --> 00:07:32,060
Does that make sense?
232
00:07:32,103 --> 00:07:33,278
I think so.
233
00:07:33,322 --> 00:07:34,758
All right,
we're making progress.
234
00:07:34,802 --> 00:07:35,803
Mom!
235
00:07:35,846 --> 00:07:38,066
I owe Sheldon
a dollar.
236
00:07:38,980 --> 00:07:40,372
Tomorrow, I'm
gonna tell Heather
237
00:07:40,416 --> 00:07:41,722
what a bitch she
is in front of everyone.
238
00:07:41,765 --> 00:07:43,637
No, no, no.
Don't show your cards.
239
00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:46,030
Tomorrow, you're gonna be
her best friend.Why?
240
00:07:46,074 --> 00:07:47,597
'Cause then
she'll tell you things,
241
00:07:47,641 --> 00:07:49,077
and you can
use those things against her.
242
00:07:49,120 --> 00:07:50,426
Oh. You're good.
243
00:07:50,470 --> 00:07:51,906
I know.
244
00:07:51,949 --> 00:07:54,735
It's nice to have someone
to talk to about this stuff.
245
00:07:54,778 --> 00:07:58,216
My mom's pretty religious,
and my meemaw's kind of old.
246
00:07:58,260 --> 00:07:59,261
MEEMAW:
Hey.
247
00:07:59,304 --> 00:08:01,437
I'm sitting right here.
248
00:08:03,047 --> 00:08:04,135
Evening.
249
00:08:04,179 --> 00:08:06,355
I thought you
were with Missy.
250
00:08:06,398 --> 00:08:07,922
Oh.
251
00:08:07,965 --> 00:08:10,881
I thought it was a good idea
if she talked to Mandy.
252
00:08:10,925 --> 00:08:11,926
[fridge door shuts]
253
00:08:11,969 --> 00:08:14,972
They're closer in age.
254
00:08:17,627 --> 00:08:19,194
She threw you over,
didn't she?
255
00:08:19,237 --> 00:08:21,152
Without hesitation.
256
00:08:21,196 --> 00:08:23,154
Stings, don't it?
257
00:08:23,198 --> 00:08:24,460
It do.
258
00:08:24,504 --> 00:08:26,593
Well, regardless,
259
00:08:26,636 --> 00:08:29,596
I'm glad Missy has someone
she can talk to.
260
00:08:29,639 --> 00:08:32,555
Like a big sister.Yeah.
261
00:08:32,599 --> 00:08:35,123
Who got knocked up
by a 17-year-old knucklehead.
262
00:08:35,166 --> 00:08:36,690
Why does she want to talk
to her instead of us?
263
00:08:36,733 --> 00:08:39,040
Pisses me off.[door opens]
264
00:08:39,083 --> 00:08:40,128
Hey. What's up?
265
00:08:40,171 --> 00:08:41,999
Nothing.
Just making dinner.
266
00:08:42,043 --> 00:08:43,218
What's going on with you?
267
00:08:43,261 --> 00:08:44,785
Just trying to stay busy.
268
00:08:44,828 --> 00:08:47,222
Keep my mind off the fact
that the mother of my child
269
00:08:47,265 --> 00:08:48,310
doesn't want me around.
270
00:08:48,353 --> 00:08:49,833
Oh, honey,
I'm sorry.
271
00:08:49,877 --> 00:08:52,488
Hey. Maybe you could put
in a good word for me.
272
00:08:52,532 --> 00:08:55,056
And what would that word be?
273
00:08:55,099 --> 00:08:57,232
Take your pick. Dependable.
274
00:08:57,275 --> 00:08:59,843
Hardworking. Trustworthy.
275
00:08:59,887 --> 00:09:00,801
Sexy.
276
00:09:00,844 --> 00:09:01,410
Georgie.
277
00:09:01,453 --> 00:09:02,542
You're right.
278
00:09:02,585 --> 00:09:04,718
Sexy's how I got
into this pickle.
279
00:09:05,893 --> 00:09:09,157
And if you add negative one
and positive one,
280
00:09:09,200 --> 00:09:10,332
you get?
281
00:09:10,375 --> 00:09:11,768
Zero?
282
00:09:11,812 --> 00:09:13,422
Correct.
283
00:09:13,465 --> 00:09:14,989
I think I understand.
284
00:09:15,032 --> 00:09:16,425
Good.One question--
285
00:09:16,468 --> 00:09:18,688
how can you have zero
if zero is nothing?
286
00:09:19,602 --> 00:09:21,082
It's not something
that you have.
287
00:09:21,125 --> 00:09:23,563
Zero represents
a state of nothingness.
288
00:09:24,912 --> 00:09:26,000
What does that mean?
289
00:09:26,043 --> 00:09:27,654
It's nothingness.
290
00:09:27,697 --> 00:09:29,569
The absence of somethingness.
291
00:09:30,657 --> 00:09:31,875
Trust me, zero is a thing.
292
00:09:31,919 --> 00:09:33,747
But you just said
it's a nothing.
293
00:09:33,790 --> 00:09:35,444
I did.
294
00:09:35,487 --> 00:09:37,272
Which is it?
295
00:09:37,315 --> 00:09:39,100
A something or a nothing?
296
00:09:39,143 --> 00:09:40,841
[exploding sound]
297
00:09:40,884 --> 00:09:42,190
[wind whooshing]
298
00:09:42,233 --> 00:09:43,452
We have a problem.
299
00:09:43,495 --> 00:09:44,366
What?
300
00:09:44,409 --> 00:09:45,889
Zero might not exist.
301
00:09:45,933 --> 00:09:49,458
[chuckles]
Of course zero exists.
302
00:09:49,501 --> 00:09:51,199
Great.
Then explain it to me.
303
00:09:51,242 --> 00:09:53,244
Easy.
Zero is nothing.
304
00:09:53,288 --> 00:09:55,595
But how can nothing
be a thing?
305
00:09:56,465 --> 00:09:57,684
Think of it this way--
306
00:09:57,727 --> 00:09:59,816
picture an empty box.
307
00:09:59,860 --> 00:10:01,339
All right.
308
00:10:01,383 --> 00:10:02,689
What's in the box?
309
00:10:02,732 --> 00:10:03,907
Nothing.
310
00:10:03,951 --> 00:10:05,953
It's not nothing.
Air, atoms, molecules--
311
00:10:05,996 --> 00:10:08,216
that empty box
is as full as full can be.
312
00:10:08,259 --> 00:10:10,610
Regardless,
313
00:10:10,653 --> 00:10:12,699
zero is very important.
314
00:10:12,742 --> 00:10:14,570
I'm not saying
it isn't important.
315
00:10:14,614 --> 00:10:16,616
I'm just saying the little
round guy ain't real.
316
00:10:16,659 --> 00:10:18,618
You're being silly.
317
00:10:18,661 --> 00:10:20,663
Zero is a number,
318
00:10:20,707 --> 00:10:22,534
like every other number.
319
00:10:22,578 --> 00:10:24,406
Oh, yeah?
Can you divide with it?
320
00:10:24,449 --> 00:10:26,016
Well...
321
00:10:27,148 --> 00:10:28,540
No.
322
00:10:28,584 --> 00:10:30,064
In fact, the Greek philosopher
Parmenides said,
323
00:10:30,107 --> 00:10:32,588
"Nothing cannot exist,
because to speak of something
324
00:10:32,632 --> 00:10:35,243
is to speak of something
that exists."
325
00:10:35,286 --> 00:10:37,549
Well, I suppose...
326
00:10:37,593 --> 00:10:39,856
you could look at it that way.
327
00:10:39,900 --> 00:10:41,379
Dr. Sturgis,
328
00:10:41,423 --> 00:10:42,554
zero isn't real.
329
00:10:42,598 --> 00:10:44,426
[exploding sound]
330
00:10:44,469 --> 00:10:45,645
[wind whooshing]
331
00:10:45,688 --> 00:10:47,037
I feel dizzy.
332
00:10:48,125 --> 00:10:49,387
[door opens]
333
00:10:50,475 --> 00:10:52,434
Need any help
making dinner?
334
00:10:52,477 --> 00:10:53,435
You?
335
00:10:53,478 --> 00:10:54,436
Yeah.
336
00:10:54,479 --> 00:10:56,177
Since when?
337
00:10:56,220 --> 00:10:59,049
Since I thought I should learn
to cook for Mandy and the baby.
338
00:10:59,093 --> 00:11:03,227
Georgie, that is the sweetest
thing I've ever heard.
339
00:11:03,271 --> 00:11:04,751
Well, I'm a sweet boy.
340
00:11:04,794 --> 00:11:06,491
So what are
we doing here?
341
00:11:07,275 --> 00:11:09,059
We are peeling potatoes.
342
00:11:09,103 --> 00:11:10,191
Cool.
343
00:11:10,234 --> 00:11:11,496
Why?
344
00:11:11,540 --> 00:11:13,324
'Cause we're making
mashed potatoes
345
00:11:13,368 --> 00:11:14,935
and we don't want
the skins in 'em.
346
00:11:14,978 --> 00:11:16,371
Uh-huh.
347
00:11:16,414 --> 00:11:17,459
Why?
348
00:11:18,286 --> 00:11:21,071
'Cause mashed potatoes
are supposed to be smooth.
349
00:11:21,115 --> 00:11:22,290
Hmm.
[chuckles]
350
00:11:22,333 --> 00:11:23,944
You know a lot
about potatoes.
351
00:11:23,987 --> 00:11:25,554
Go ahead. Peel one.
352
00:11:25,597 --> 00:11:26,686
You think I'm ready?
353
00:11:26,729 --> 00:11:28,688
Only one way to find out.
354
00:11:30,254 --> 00:11:31,516
I'll see ya later.
355
00:11:31,560 --> 00:11:32,387
Where you going?
356
00:11:32,430 --> 00:11:33,388
To dinner.
357
00:11:33,431 --> 00:11:34,476
[scoffs]
I'm cooking.
358
00:11:34,519 --> 00:11:36,391
Actually, we'recooking.
359
00:11:36,434 --> 00:11:37,784
Actually, we're bleeding.
360
00:11:37,827 --> 00:11:39,394
Mandy's taking me to dinner.
361
00:11:39,437 --> 00:11:40,656
What about homework?
362
00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:41,657
Don't have any.
363
00:11:41,701 --> 00:11:42,745
Can I go with y'all?
364
00:11:42,789 --> 00:11:44,747
I thought you were
helping me cook.
365
00:11:44,791 --> 00:11:45,400
Hang on.
366
00:11:45,443 --> 00:11:46,488
Can I?
367
00:11:46,531 --> 00:11:48,011
No. It's girls' night.
368
00:11:48,055 --> 00:11:49,099
Bye.
369
00:11:51,754 --> 00:11:53,974
Might want to wash
this one off.
370
00:11:54,017 --> 00:11:55,366
Oh.
371
00:11:55,410 --> 00:11:56,933
Any updates on Kevin?
372
00:11:56,977 --> 00:11:59,719
I did what you said and
was nothing but nice to Heather.
373
00:11:59,762 --> 00:12:01,111
Okay. How'd that go?
374
00:12:01,155 --> 00:12:02,330
So good.
375
00:12:02,373 --> 00:12:03,810
I found out
she stuffs her bra.
376
00:12:03,853 --> 00:12:05,681
Huh. See?
When the time is right,
377
00:12:05,725 --> 00:12:07,204
you can destroy her with that.
378
00:12:07,248 --> 00:12:08,989
That's gonna be a good day.
379
00:12:09,032 --> 00:12:10,773
And that trick
isn't just for middle school.
380
00:12:10,817 --> 00:12:12,993
That's something you can use
for the rest of your life.
381
00:12:13,036 --> 00:12:14,734
You are so wise.
382
00:12:15,604 --> 00:12:17,345
Well, I have
lived a little.
383
00:12:17,388 --> 00:12:18,476
And so pretty.
384
00:12:18,520 --> 00:12:19,739
You should be on TV.
385
00:12:19,782 --> 00:12:21,653
Actually,
when I lived in San Antonio,
386
00:12:21,697 --> 00:12:23,264
I was a weather girl.
387
00:12:23,307 --> 00:12:25,005
Oh, my God,
you were a TV star?
388
00:12:25,048 --> 00:12:27,181
Monday through Friday,
5:00 a.m.,
389
00:12:27,224 --> 00:12:28,399
right before the farm report.
390
00:12:28,443 --> 00:12:30,053
Okay, you're, like, my new hero.
391
00:12:30,097 --> 00:12:31,881
Oh, stop. You could
totally be a weather girl.
392
00:12:31,925 --> 00:12:35,102
No. They're all perfect
and blonde. Like you.
393
00:12:35,145 --> 00:12:36,843
Anybody can be blonde.
394
00:12:36,886 --> 00:12:38,801
[scoffs] You think
Madonna's really blonde?
395
00:12:38,845 --> 00:12:40,368
What?
396
00:12:40,411 --> 00:12:41,673
[whispers]:
She's a brunette.
397
00:12:41,717 --> 00:12:43,763
What about
her Blond Ambition Tour?
398
00:12:43,806 --> 00:12:46,940
Ha. More like Bottle Blond
Ambition Tour.
399
00:12:46,983 --> 00:12:48,855
Funny and beautiful.
400
00:12:48,898 --> 00:12:51,118
No wonder my brother
put a baby in you.
401
00:12:53,033 --> 00:12:55,078
♪
402
00:12:56,688 --> 00:12:57,820
What's wrong?
403
00:12:57,864 --> 00:12:59,387
Zero.
404
00:12:59,430 --> 00:13:01,171
Zero is wrong?
405
00:13:01,215 --> 00:13:03,304
Zero doesn't exist.
406
00:13:04,087 --> 00:13:05,088
I don't understand.
407
00:13:05,132 --> 00:13:06,568
Neither do we.
408
00:13:06,611 --> 00:13:08,875
Dr. Linkletter,
there's no such thing as zero.
409
00:13:08,918 --> 00:13:11,225
That's preposterous.
Of course there is.
410
00:13:11,268 --> 00:13:13,357
Prove it, tough guy.
411
00:13:13,401 --> 00:13:14,532
[stammers]
412
00:13:14,576 --> 00:13:16,752
♪
413
00:13:17,709 --> 00:13:19,059
Uh-oh.
414
00:13:20,712 --> 00:13:22,410
[retches, coughs]
415
00:13:22,453 --> 00:13:24,368
May I have that?
416
00:13:26,893 --> 00:13:28,851
[retches loudly]
417
00:13:29,852 --> 00:13:30,853
Over here.
418
00:13:37,381 --> 00:13:39,035
Uh-oh.
419
00:13:44,388 --> 00:13:45,607
[footsteps approaching]
420
00:13:45,650 --> 00:13:46,564
Let me see.
421
00:13:46,608 --> 00:13:47,261
It's bad.
422
00:13:47,304 --> 00:13:48,349
Just stay calm.
423
00:13:48,392 --> 00:13:49,393
I'm sure it's fine.
424
00:13:49,437 --> 00:13:50,742
It's the end of my life.
425
00:13:50,786 --> 00:13:52,353
Just show me.
426
00:13:56,357 --> 00:13:58,838
[exhales]
Oh, my.
427
00:13:58,881 --> 00:14:01,014
That is... something.
428
00:14:01,057 --> 00:14:02,711
I can probably be
homeschooled, right?
429
00:14:04,191 --> 00:14:05,888
It's okay. We can fix this.
430
00:14:05,932 --> 00:14:06,976
Before my parents get home?
431
00:14:07,020 --> 00:14:08,369
They're gonna kill me.
432
00:14:08,412 --> 00:14:09,370
Oh, man.
433
00:14:09,413 --> 00:14:11,024
Look at your head.
434
00:14:11,067 --> 00:14:12,982
Shut up!Georgie, don't make this worse.
435
00:14:13,026 --> 00:14:14,636
There's worse?[door opens]
436
00:14:14,679 --> 00:14:16,159
GEORGE SR.:
Anyone home?[door closes]
437
00:14:16,203 --> 00:14:18,161
Okay, stay here.
We'll stall him.
438
00:14:18,205 --> 00:14:19,989
Do you see
her head?
439
00:14:20,033 --> 00:14:21,338
GEORGE SR.:
Oh.
440
00:14:21,382 --> 00:14:23,950
Hey. What's up?
441
00:14:23,993 --> 00:14:26,343
Nothing. Nada.
Absolutely nothing.
442
00:14:26,387 --> 00:14:27,867
Where are the kids?
443
00:14:28,650 --> 00:14:31,218
Well, I believe
Sheldon's at Billy's.
444
00:14:32,001 --> 00:14:33,873
Oh, good. He's helping him.
445
00:14:33,916 --> 00:14:35,918
Mm.And Missy?
446
00:14:35,962 --> 00:14:37,267
Missy...
447
00:14:37,311 --> 00:14:39,052
That's a good question.
448
00:14:39,095 --> 00:14:40,531
I haven't seen her.
449
00:14:40,575 --> 00:14:44,579
I have not seen her,
personally, myself.
450
00:14:45,580 --> 00:14:46,886
Okay.
451
00:14:51,151 --> 00:14:52,195
[door closes]
452
00:14:52,239 --> 00:14:53,457
We're a good team,
me and you.
453
00:14:53,501 --> 00:14:55,111
Oh, not now, Georgie.
454
00:14:56,069 --> 00:14:58,419
I'm afraid I have
some bad news.
455
00:14:58,462 --> 00:15:01,161
If you mean I'm gonna
be left back, it's okay.
456
00:15:01,204 --> 00:15:02,205
You tried.
457
00:15:02,249 --> 00:15:04,120
No. Well, maybe.
458
00:15:04,164 --> 00:15:05,948
I have bad news about zero.
459
00:15:05,992 --> 00:15:07,341
It doesn't exist.
460
00:15:07,384 --> 00:15:08,733
So I was right?
461
00:15:08,777 --> 00:15:10,474
No one is more shocked
than I am.
462
00:15:10,518 --> 00:15:12,868
I can't help you
with your test.
463
00:15:12,912 --> 00:15:15,436
Without zero, I don't even know
what math is anymore.
464
00:15:15,479 --> 00:15:16,654
Hmm.
465
00:15:16,698 --> 00:15:18,526
Yeah. Hmm.
466
00:15:18,569 --> 00:15:21,137
What if we just
pretend it exists?
467
00:15:21,964 --> 00:15:24,793
Are you saying to accept zero
as an act of faith?
468
00:15:24,836 --> 00:15:25,707
Was I?
469
00:15:25,750 --> 00:15:27,056
I think so.
470
00:15:27,100 --> 00:15:28,492
Okay.
471
00:15:28,536 --> 00:15:30,407
My mom accepts God
as an act of faith,
472
00:15:30,451 --> 00:15:32,148
and zero is way more useful
than God.
473
00:15:32,192 --> 00:15:35,108
Do not say that
around Pastor Jeff.Think about it.
474
00:15:35,151 --> 00:15:36,674
Without zero,
we wouldn't have calculus.
475
00:15:36,718 --> 00:15:39,068
Without God, we wouldn't have
Spanish Inquisition.
476
00:15:39,112 --> 00:15:41,505
I know the Spanish
word for "fajita."
477
00:15:41,549 --> 00:15:43,246
And don't forget--
before the Big Bang,
478
00:15:43,290 --> 00:15:44,726
there was actually nothing.
479
00:15:44,769 --> 00:15:45,988
It's "fajita."
480
00:15:46,032 --> 00:15:48,077
So you could say
the entire universe
481
00:15:48,121 --> 00:15:49,470
was born out of zero.
482
00:15:49,513 --> 00:15:52,342
Meaning that zero created
the universe, not God.
483
00:15:52,386 --> 00:15:54,344
Maybe we should pray to it.
484
00:15:54,388 --> 00:15:56,085
I think we should.
485
00:15:57,521 --> 00:15:59,480
Zero, it's me,Sheldon.
486
00:15:59,523 --> 00:16:01,003
I know I doubted you,
but in my defense,
487
00:16:01,047 --> 00:16:02,744
you're literally nothing.
488
00:16:02,787 --> 00:16:05,138
I would like to thank you for
all the gifts you've given us--
489
00:16:05,181 --> 00:16:07,618
the null set,
Fibonacci sequence,
490
00:16:07,662 --> 00:16:08,968
binary language.
491
00:16:09,011 --> 00:16:10,970
I could go on
ad infinitum,
492
00:16:11,013 --> 00:16:12,232
but not without you.
493
00:16:12,275 --> 00:16:14,625
[whispers]: Ask Zero
to help me pass my test.
494
00:16:14,669 --> 00:16:16,453
Zero's not magic.
You still have to study.
495
00:16:16,497 --> 00:16:18,803
Oh. Then I'm going back
to Jesus.
496
00:16:18,847 --> 00:16:20,588
Jesus, please help me.
497
00:16:20,631 --> 00:16:23,417
I'm already the biggest kid
in sixth grade.
498
00:16:24,853 --> 00:16:25,854
Amen.
499
00:16:25,897 --> 00:16:27,377
Amen.
500
00:16:28,248 --> 00:16:30,598
[TV playing indistinctly]
501
00:16:32,861 --> 00:16:34,645
Hello? Who's in there?
502
00:16:34,689 --> 00:16:36,082
MISSY:
Me.
503
00:16:36,125 --> 00:16:37,648
I need to use the bathroom.
504
00:16:37,692 --> 00:16:39,302
Give me a minute.
505
00:16:40,825 --> 00:16:42,262
[sighs]
506
00:16:42,305 --> 00:16:45,047
Can someone give me a hand
with these groceries?
507
00:16:45,091 --> 00:16:46,396
Sure. Dad, come on.
508
00:16:46,440 --> 00:16:48,007
[stammers]
I got to go to the bathroom.
509
00:16:48,050 --> 00:16:49,573
Hey, Mandy.
510
00:16:49,617 --> 00:16:50,400
Mrs. Cooper.
511
00:16:50,444 --> 00:16:52,315
What brings you here?
512
00:16:53,142 --> 00:16:54,578
Just saying hi to Georgie.
513
00:16:55,405 --> 00:16:57,494
Why, hello to you, too.
514
00:16:58,930 --> 00:17:00,541
Let's get a move on.
515
00:17:03,805 --> 00:17:05,067
Oh, boy.
516
00:17:05,111 --> 00:17:06,851
Damn it, Missy.
I'm two seconds away
517
00:17:06,895 --> 00:17:08,984
from peeing
in your mother's prayer garden.[door closes]
518
00:17:09,028 --> 00:17:11,639
Look what I found.
519
00:17:11,682 --> 00:17:13,032
What the hell?
520
00:17:13,075 --> 00:17:13,945
Melissa Cooper,
521
00:17:13,989 --> 00:17:15,295
what did you do?
522
00:17:15,338 --> 00:17:17,732
Yeah. What did you do?
523
00:17:18,559 --> 00:17:19,908
Yeah.[door closes]
524
00:17:19,951 --> 00:17:21,170
Good news.
I think Billy
525
00:17:21,214 --> 00:17:23,085
might pass his
math test tomorrow.
526
00:17:23,129 --> 00:17:24,869
There's a math test tomorrow?
527
00:17:24,913 --> 00:17:26,436
Your hair is
upsetting me.
528
00:17:26,480 --> 00:17:28,569
Screw it.
I'm going outside.
529
00:17:29,744 --> 00:17:30,788
[door slams]
530
00:17:37,969 --> 00:17:39,232
[quietly]: You can cheat off me
if you want.
531
00:17:39,275 --> 00:17:40,102
I studied.
532
00:17:40,146 --> 00:17:41,712
[whispers]:
Thanks.
533
00:17:42,757 --> 00:17:45,325
ADULT SHELDON:
I'm not saying
it was God or zero,
534
00:17:45,368 --> 00:17:48,023
but a small miracle
did happen that day.
535
00:17:48,067 --> 00:17:50,504
Billy passed the test with a 68
536
00:17:50,547 --> 00:17:53,463
and went on
to the seventh grade.
537
00:17:53,507 --> 00:17:56,336
Where he remained
for the next several years.
538
00:18:01,080 --> 00:18:04,039
Captioning sponsored by
CBS
539
00:18:04,083 --> 00:18:09,827
WARNER BROS. TELEVISION
540
00:18:09,871 --> 00:18:13,266
Captioned by
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