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Previously on Young Sheldon..
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Why do you look like you're gonna cry?
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A year ago, I was a TV
weather girl in San Antonio,
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00:00:08,180 --> 00:00:10,750
and now I'm living in a
garage with the 17-year-old
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who got me pregnant.
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I'll be 18 before you know it.
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But not before you're a father!
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It's gonna be okay.
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[sniffles, exhales]
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Is it?
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[whispers]: I peed in
the sink last night.
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[squeaks]
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Trust me. I'll fix this.
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Make yourself at home.
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Oh. Thank you so much.
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It's only temporary. I promise.
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Oh. No problem.
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Stay as long as you need.
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Bathroom's right down the hall.
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Oh, boy, a bathroom.
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MEEMAW: Here you go...
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Scrambled eggs, bacon,
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biscuits and fresh-squeezed orange juice.
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Thank you. Looks amazing.
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Where's mine?
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You're not pregnant. She is.
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Well, I like to think we're pregnant.
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Really?
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Are your ankles swollen?
30
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Did you throw up this morning?
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Are you constipated?
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No, dear.
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Stop calling me "dear."
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I'm not your dear.
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You want breakfast, eggs are here,
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stove is there.
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Knock yourself out.
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I get she's pregnant.
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I don't know why you're so moody.
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On the count of three...
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I'm leaving, I'm leaving.
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Have a good day, Mama.
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Ugh. "Mama."
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♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪
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♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪
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♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪
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♪ I am a mighty little man ♪
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- Synced and corrected by VitoSilans -
-- www.Addic7ed.com --
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ADULT SHELDON: Since losing his job,
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one of the few upsides for my dad
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was having the house to himself
to enjoy some peace and quiet.
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BRENDA: Billy!
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Stop feeding the chickens Cap'n Crunch!
54
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- BILLY: But they like it.
- We've been over this.
55
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You don't eat their food,
they don't eat yours.
56
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Everything okay over there?
57
00:01:54,784 --> 00:01:56,470
Yeah.
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Doesn't sound okay.
59
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Oh. You don't want to know.
60
00:02:00,426 --> 00:02:01,904
Tell me.
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00:02:04,077 --> 00:02:05,769
He's failing math,
62
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and they might hold him back.
63
00:02:07,265 --> 00:02:08,622
That's rough.
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00:02:08,625 --> 00:02:11,532
I try helping him, but math
was never my strong suit.
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Yeah, I hear ya.
66
00:02:12,877 --> 00:02:14,635
And when you do try to
help 'em, they realize
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00:02:14,638 --> 00:02:15,765
how dumb you are.
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00:02:15,767 --> 00:02:17,721
You think...
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00:02:17,723 --> 00:02:19,329
Sheldon would help Billy?
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00:02:19,331 --> 00:02:22,849
[sighs] I'm not sure helping
others is where he shines.
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00:02:22,851 --> 00:02:25,833
Pissing 'em off...
He's got that down cold.
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00:02:25,836 --> 00:02:27,920
Well, then I'm screwed.
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I can't afford a tutor.
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Let me talk to Sheldon,
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see what I can do.
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Appreciate it.
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BILLY: Mom, look!
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That chicken is not a hat!
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Hurry.
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Hey. How was school?
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Sucked.
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Language.
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You asked, and it did.
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What happened?
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I don't want to talk about it.
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00:02:53,109 --> 00:02:53,976
Are you sure?
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00:02:53,979 --> 00:02:55,594
I'm a pretty good listener.
88
00:02:55,597 --> 00:02:58,529
Then why didn't you hear me say
I don't want to talk about it?
89
00:02:58,532 --> 00:03:01,050
- Is this about a boy?
- Mom.
90
00:03:01,052 --> 00:03:03,646
I-I do have some
experience on the subject.
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00:03:03,649 --> 00:03:05,656
Please, the only two boys
you have experience with
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00:03:05,659 --> 00:03:07,482
are Dad and Jesus.
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00:03:07,484 --> 00:03:09,006
I'm gonna go talk to Meemaw.
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I know other boys.
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00:03:12,526 --> 00:03:15,088
And then he walked right on
by me like I wasn't there.
96
00:03:15,090 --> 00:03:17,088
Does he even know you like him?
97
00:03:17,090 --> 00:03:19,695
I don't know. I've ignored
him, been mean to him.
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00:03:19,697 --> 00:03:21,129
What else can I do?
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00:03:21,131 --> 00:03:24,041
Sounds like you've tried everything.
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00:03:24,043 --> 00:03:25,498
Okay.
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00:03:25,501 --> 00:03:27,193
I've got an idea.
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Why don't you just tell him?
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00:03:28,823 --> 00:03:30,472
But what if he doesn't like me back?
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I would die.
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00:03:31,518 --> 00:03:32,950
You will not die.
106
00:03:32,952 --> 00:03:34,775
Oh, yes, I will. I will be dead,
107
00:03:34,777 --> 00:03:36,166
and you will be sad at my funeral.
108
00:03:36,168 --> 00:03:37,469
How about this...
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00:03:37,471 --> 00:03:39,165
Why don't you get one
of your girlfriends
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to find out how he feels about you.
111
00:03:41,079 --> 00:03:42,505
- Why?
- Because then you don't
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00:03:42,507 --> 00:03:44,250
have to put yourself on the spot.
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Okay. And if he doesn't like me back,
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00:03:46,946 --> 00:03:49,330
I'll just keep being
mean to him until he does.
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00:03:49,333 --> 00:03:50,768
I don't know why that works.
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00:03:50,770 --> 00:03:52,115
Men are dumb.
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00:03:52,117 --> 00:03:54,690
Does that mean we're
dumb for liking 'em?
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It's not a good look for us.
119
00:04:02,070 --> 00:04:03,458
- [knocking]
- You busy?
120
00:04:03,460 --> 00:04:04,936
Yes, but I'm also excellent
121
00:04:04,938 --> 00:04:07,587
at bifurcating my
cognitive abilities. Hit me.
122
00:04:07,589 --> 00:04:08,701
[sighs]
123
00:04:08,704 --> 00:04:11,063
Billy is struggling with math, and, mm,
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00:04:11,066 --> 00:04:13,150
his mom was hoping that
you could tutor him.
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00:04:13,152 --> 00:04:14,222
I could.
126
00:04:14,225 --> 00:04:15,931
- Great.
- But I won't.
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00:04:15,933 --> 00:04:17,150
Why not?
128
00:04:17,153 --> 00:04:19,104
Because me teaching Billy
is like trying to use
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00:04:19,106 --> 00:04:20,669
the gravitational
power of a neutron star
130
00:04:20,671 --> 00:04:22,450
to change the spin of a boson.
131
00:04:22,452 --> 00:04:24,319
Don't do that.
132
00:04:24,321 --> 00:04:25,883
If he doesn't pass math,
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00:04:25,885 --> 00:04:27,361
they're gonna hold him back.
134
00:04:27,363 --> 00:04:28,534
That's the system working.
135
00:04:28,536 --> 00:04:30,707
Very Darwinian.
136
00:04:30,709 --> 00:04:32,229
Yeah. Never mind.
137
00:04:32,231 --> 00:04:35,109
Yeah, I told Brenda teaching
wasn't really your thing.
138
00:04:35,112 --> 00:04:36,575
Well, it's not that I can't do it.
139
00:04:36,577 --> 00:04:37,661
Don't worry about it.
140
00:04:37,663 --> 00:04:38,966
You're good at a lot of things.
141
00:04:38,968 --> 00:04:40,399
Teaching just ain't one of 'em.
142
00:04:40,401 --> 00:04:43,007
I know what you're doing.
It's reverse psychology.
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00:04:43,009 --> 00:04:44,569
I don't know what you're talking about.
144
00:04:44,571 --> 00:04:46,585
It's childish and obvious.
145
00:04:46,588 --> 00:04:49,491
- So you'll do it?
- Yes, I'll do it.
146
00:04:49,494 --> 00:04:51,351
Thanks for the pie.
147
00:04:51,353 --> 00:04:54,820
Mandy keeps bringing all
these leftovers from the diner.
148
00:04:54,823 --> 00:04:57,132
- [chuckles]
- Well, she's lucky to have you.
149
00:04:57,134 --> 00:04:58,305
[softly]: Mm-hmm.
150
00:04:58,307 --> 00:05:00,694
And Missy, too.
151
00:05:00,696 --> 00:05:02,564
Lucky, lucky.
152
00:05:02,566 --> 00:05:05,041
Oh, it's killing you, isn't it?
153
00:05:05,043 --> 00:05:06,344
What? No.
154
00:05:06,346 --> 00:05:07,388
I...
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00:05:07,390 --> 00:05:08,778
I am happy
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00:05:08,780 --> 00:05:12,342
that she has an adult she can confide in
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00:05:12,344 --> 00:05:14,648
about... [sputters softly]
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00:05:16,167 --> 00:05:18,295
Come on. Just tell me.
159
00:05:18,298 --> 00:05:20,078
I would.
160
00:05:20,080 --> 00:05:24,033
But the bond between a girl
and her grandmother is...
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00:05:24,035 --> 00:05:25,162
sacred.
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00:05:25,164 --> 00:05:27,998
I am her mother and I am your daughter.
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00:05:28,001 --> 00:05:29,292
Give me something.
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00:05:29,294 --> 00:05:30,639
[sighs]
165
00:05:30,641 --> 00:05:32,464
It's just boy stuff, okay?
166
00:05:32,466 --> 00:05:33,724
[exhales]
167
00:05:33,726 --> 00:05:35,637
That she'd rather talk to you about.
168
00:05:35,639 --> 00:05:36,766
That's right.
169
00:05:36,768 --> 00:05:38,854
[sighing groan]
170
00:05:39,984 --> 00:05:41,764
There you go.
171
00:05:41,766 --> 00:05:43,894
Eat those feelings.
172
00:05:43,896 --> 00:05:45,762
All right, I'm given
to understand you have
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00:05:45,764 --> 00:05:48,297
a test coming up on negative
numbers and fractions.
174
00:05:48,300 --> 00:05:49,500
Yeah.
175
00:05:49,502 --> 00:05:51,848
So, what part don't you understand?
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00:05:54,542 --> 00:05:55,888
Oh, boy.
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00:05:55,891 --> 00:05:57,236
Let's take it back a step.
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00:05:57,238 --> 00:05:58,800
Where do you stand on
addition, subtraction,
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00:05:58,802 --> 00:06:00,495
multiplication and division?
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00:06:00,497 --> 00:06:02,451
I'm against it.
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00:06:02,453 --> 00:06:03,798
[exhales]
182
00:06:03,800 --> 00:06:06,189
[quietly]: Oh, boy.
183
00:06:06,191 --> 00:06:07,362
Hope you like tuna salad.
184
00:06:07,364 --> 00:06:08,878
I brought you a whole tub.
185
00:06:08,881 --> 00:06:10,313
How old is it?
186
00:06:10,316 --> 00:06:12,099
I don't know, but the clock's ticking.
187
00:06:12,101 --> 00:06:14,012
Meemaw?
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00:06:14,014 --> 00:06:15,228
Uh-oh.
189
00:06:15,230 --> 00:06:16,271
We need to talk.
190
00:06:16,273 --> 00:06:17,227
Hi.
191
00:06:17,229 --> 00:06:18,748
- Hi.
- What's going on?
192
00:06:18,750 --> 00:06:20,617
I told Heather that I liked Kevin
193
00:06:20,619 --> 00:06:22,659
so she could find out
if he liked me back.
194
00:06:22,661 --> 00:06:24,268
Then she asked him out.
195
00:06:24,270 --> 00:06:25,571
- What?
- She didn't even think
196
00:06:25,573 --> 00:06:27,397
he was cute until I said I liked him.
197
00:06:27,399 --> 00:06:28,570
Well, why'd you tell her?
198
00:06:28,572 --> 00:06:29,700
She told me to.
199
00:06:29,702 --> 00:06:30,960
'Cause that's how you find out
200
00:06:30,962 --> 00:06:32,525
if somebody likes you in school.
201
00:06:32,527 --> 00:06:35,263
That's o-one way.
202
00:06:35,265 --> 00:06:37,049
Why? What would you have done?
203
00:06:37,052 --> 00:06:39,652
Uh, well, you put him on Heather's radar
204
00:06:39,654 --> 00:06:40,913
when you said you liked him.
205
00:06:40,915 --> 00:06:42,564
I probably would have dropped a note
206
00:06:42,566 --> 00:06:44,717
in his locker or asked
one of his guy friends.
207
00:06:44,720 --> 00:06:46,867
That makes so much more sense.
208
00:06:46,869 --> 00:06:48,127
Why didn't you tell me that?
209
00:06:48,129 --> 00:06:49,300
I gave you good advice.
210
00:06:49,302 --> 00:06:51,386
It's not my fault Heather sucks.
211
00:06:51,388 --> 00:06:53,256
[scoffs] So what do I do now?
212
00:06:53,258 --> 00:06:54,429
Well, the first thing...
213
00:06:54,431 --> 00:06:55,604
I was talking to her.
214
00:07:01,236 --> 00:07:03,279
Okay, your basic arithmetic skills
215
00:07:03,282 --> 00:07:05,074
are disappointing but functional.
216
00:07:05,077 --> 00:07:06,422
Thank you.
217
00:07:06,425 --> 00:07:08,413
All right, let's talk
about negative numbers.
218
00:07:08,416 --> 00:07:09,674
I'm all ear.
219
00:07:09,677 --> 00:07:10,719
"Ears."
220
00:07:10,722 --> 00:07:12,240
No. "Ear."
221
00:07:12,243 --> 00:07:13,710
This one's clogged.
222
00:07:13,713 --> 00:07:15,493
Right. Okay.
223
00:07:15,496 --> 00:07:18,362
Negative numbers are numbers
that are less than zero.
224
00:07:18,365 --> 00:07:20,188
- But zero's nothing.
- Yes.
225
00:07:20,191 --> 00:07:22,276
So how can you have less than nothing?
226
00:07:22,279 --> 00:07:23,450
Let's see.
227
00:07:23,453 --> 00:07:24,713
How about this?
228
00:07:24,716 --> 00:07:26,756
If you have a dollar, that's one.
229
00:07:26,759 --> 00:07:28,814
If you have no dollars, that's zero.
230
00:07:28,817 --> 00:07:31,074
But if you owe me a
dollar, that's negative one.
231
00:07:31,077 --> 00:07:32,293
Does that make sense?
232
00:07:32,296 --> 00:07:33,511
I think so.
233
00:07:33,514 --> 00:07:35,115
All right, we're making progress.
234
00:07:35,118 --> 00:07:36,158
Mom!
235
00:07:36,161 --> 00:07:38,877
I owe Sheldon a dollar.
236
00:07:38,880 --> 00:07:40,312
Tomorrow, I'm gonna tell Heather
237
00:07:40,315 --> 00:07:42,190
what a bitch she is
in front of everyone.
238
00:07:42,193 --> 00:07:44,103
No, no, no. Don't show your cards.
239
00:07:44,105 --> 00:07:46,493
- Tomorrow, you're gonna be her best friend.
- Why?
240
00:07:46,496 --> 00:07:47,672
'Cause then she'll tell you things,
241
00:07:47,674 --> 00:07:49,247
and you can use those
things against her.
242
00:07:49,249 --> 00:07:50,595
Oh. You're good.
243
00:07:50,598 --> 00:07:52,072
I know.
244
00:07:52,075 --> 00:07:54,898
It's nice to have someone
to talk to about this stuff.
245
00:07:54,901 --> 00:07:58,170
My mom's pretty religious,
and my meemaw's kind of old.
246
00:07:58,173 --> 00:07:59,213
MEEMAW: Hey.
247
00:07:59,216 --> 00:08:01,346
I'm sitting right here.
248
00:08:03,444 --> 00:08:04,573
Evening.
249
00:08:04,575 --> 00:08:06,400
I thought you were with Missy.
250
00:08:06,403 --> 00:08:07,966
Oh.
251
00:08:07,969 --> 00:08:11,308
I thought it was a good
idea if she talked to Mandy.
252
00:08:11,311 --> 00:08:12,351
[fridge door shuts]
253
00:08:12,353 --> 00:08:14,740
They're closer in age.
254
00:08:17,760 --> 00:08:19,365
She threw you over, didn't she?
255
00:08:19,368 --> 00:08:21,323
Without hesitation.
256
00:08:21,326 --> 00:08:23,236
Stings, don't it?
257
00:08:23,239 --> 00:08:24,522
It do.
258
00:08:24,525 --> 00:08:26,809
Well, regardless,
259
00:08:26,812 --> 00:08:29,809
I'm glad Missy has
someone she can talk to.
260
00:08:29,812 --> 00:08:32,535
- Like a big sister.
- Yeah.
261
00:08:32,538 --> 00:08:35,514
Who got knocked up by a
17-year-old knucklehead.
262
00:08:35,517 --> 00:08:37,408
Why does she want to
talk to her instead of us?
263
00:08:37,411 --> 00:08:39,291
- Pisses me off.
- [door opens]
264
00:08:39,294 --> 00:08:40,378
Hey. What's up?
265
00:08:40,381 --> 00:08:42,249
Nothing. Just making dinner.
266
00:08:42,252 --> 00:08:43,599
What's going on with you?
267
00:08:43,601 --> 00:08:45,164
Just trying to stay busy.
268
00:08:45,166 --> 00:08:47,334
Keep my mind off the fact
that the mother of my child
269
00:08:47,337 --> 00:08:48,422
doesn't want me around.
270
00:08:48,425 --> 00:08:50,204
Oh, honey, I'm sorry.
271
00:08:50,207 --> 00:08:52,857
Hey. Maybe you could put
in a good word for me.
272
00:08:52,859 --> 00:08:55,420
And what would that word be?
273
00:08:55,422 --> 00:08:57,413
Take your pick. Dependable.
274
00:08:57,416 --> 00:08:59,879
Hardworking. Trustworthy.
275
00:08:59,882 --> 00:09:01,765
- Sexy.
- Georgie.
276
00:09:01,767 --> 00:09:02,895
You're right.
277
00:09:02,897 --> 00:09:05,027
Sexy's how I got into this pickle.
278
00:09:06,201 --> 00:09:09,501
And if you add negative
one and positive one,
279
00:09:09,503 --> 00:09:10,674
you get?
280
00:09:10,676 --> 00:09:12,109
Zero?
281
00:09:12,111 --> 00:09:13,461
Correct.
282
00:09:13,464 --> 00:09:14,920
I think I understand.
283
00:09:14,923 --> 00:09:16,757
- Good.
- One question...
284
00:09:16,760 --> 00:09:19,888
How can you have zero
if zero is nothing?
285
00:09:19,890 --> 00:09:21,409
It's not something that you have.
286
00:09:21,411 --> 00:09:23,845
Zero represents a state of nothingness.
287
00:09:25,192 --> 00:09:26,320
What does that mean?
288
00:09:26,322 --> 00:09:27,971
It's nothingness.
289
00:09:27,973 --> 00:09:29,843
The absence of somethingness.
290
00:09:30,748 --> 00:09:32,187
Trust me, zero is a thing.
291
00:09:32,189 --> 00:09:34,056
But you just said it's a nothing.
292
00:09:34,058 --> 00:09:35,750
I did.
293
00:09:35,752 --> 00:09:37,576
Which is it?
294
00:09:37,578 --> 00:09:39,401
A something or a nothing?
295
00:09:39,403 --> 00:09:41,140
[exploding sound]
296
00:09:41,142 --> 00:09:42,271
[wind whooshing]
297
00:09:42,274 --> 00:09:43,550
We have a problem.
298
00:09:43,553 --> 00:09:44,660
What?
299
00:09:44,662 --> 00:09:46,181
Zero might not exist.
300
00:09:46,183 --> 00:09:49,511
[chuckles] Of course zero exists.
301
00:09:49,514 --> 00:09:51,250
Great. Then explain it to me.
302
00:09:51,253 --> 00:09:53,525
Easy. Zero is nothing.
303
00:09:53,528 --> 00:09:56,556
But how can nothing be a thing?
304
00:09:56,559 --> 00:09:57,959
Think of it this way...
305
00:09:57,961 --> 00:10:00,088
Picture an empty box.
306
00:10:00,090 --> 00:10:01,322
All right.
307
00:10:01,325 --> 00:10:02,670
What's in the box?
308
00:10:02,673 --> 00:10:03,834
Nothing.
309
00:10:03,837 --> 00:10:06,215
It's not nothing. Air,
atoms, molecules...
310
00:10:06,218 --> 00:10:08,476
That empty box is as
full as full can be.
311
00:10:08,477 --> 00:10:10,866
Regardless,
312
00:10:10,868 --> 00:10:13,169
zero is very important.
313
00:10:13,172 --> 00:10:14,821
I'm not saying it isn't important.
314
00:10:14,823 --> 00:10:16,864
I'm just saying the little
round guy ain't real.
315
00:10:16,866 --> 00:10:18,863
You're being silly.
316
00:10:18,865 --> 00:10:20,906
Zero is a number,
317
00:10:20,908 --> 00:10:22,774
like every other number.
318
00:10:22,776 --> 00:10:24,642
Oh, yeah? Can you divide with it?
319
00:10:24,644 --> 00:10:26,209
Well...
320
00:10:26,933 --> 00:10:28,365
No.
321
00:10:28,368 --> 00:10:30,291
In fact, the Greek
philosopher Parmenides said,
322
00:10:30,294 --> 00:10:32,814
"Nothing cannot exist,
because to speak of something
323
00:10:32,816 --> 00:10:35,464
is to speak of something that exists."
324
00:10:35,466 --> 00:10:37,768
Well, I suppose...
325
00:10:37,770 --> 00:10:39,720
you could look at it that way.
326
00:10:39,723 --> 00:10:41,242
Dr. Sturgis,
327
00:10:41,245 --> 00:10:42,765
zero isn't real.
328
00:10:42,767 --> 00:10:44,634
[exploding sound]
329
00:10:44,636 --> 00:10:45,851
[wind whooshing]
330
00:10:45,853 --> 00:10:47,200
I feel dizzy.
331
00:10:48,287 --> 00:10:49,547
[door opens]
332
00:10:50,399 --> 00:10:52,396
Need any help making dinner?
333
00:10:52,399 --> 00:10:53,630
You?
334
00:10:53,632 --> 00:10:54,774
Yeah.
335
00:10:54,777 --> 00:10:56,368
Since when?
336
00:10:56,370 --> 00:10:59,237
Since I thought I should learn
to cook for Mandy and the baby.
337
00:10:59,239 --> 00:11:03,409
Georgie, that is the sweetest
thing I've ever heard.
338
00:11:03,411 --> 00:11:04,930
Well, I'm a sweet boy.
339
00:11:04,932 --> 00:11:07,407
So what are we doing here?
340
00:11:07,409 --> 00:11:09,233
We are peeling potatoes.
341
00:11:09,235 --> 00:11:10,362
Cool.
342
00:11:10,364 --> 00:11:11,666
Why?
343
00:11:11,668 --> 00:11:13,492
'Cause we're making mashed potatoes
344
00:11:13,494 --> 00:11:15,099
and we don't want the skins in 'em.
345
00:11:15,101 --> 00:11:16,533
Uh-huh.
346
00:11:16,535 --> 00:11:18,403
Why?
347
00:11:18,405 --> 00:11:21,013
'Cause mashed potatoes
are supposed to be smooth.
348
00:11:21,016 --> 00:11:22,230
Hmm. [chuckles]
349
00:11:22,233 --> 00:11:24,094
You know a lot about potatoes.
350
00:11:24,097 --> 00:11:25,703
Go ahead. Peel one.
351
00:11:25,705 --> 00:11:26,833
You think I'm ready?
352
00:11:26,835 --> 00:11:28,792
Only one way to find out.
353
00:11:30,355 --> 00:11:31,658
I'll see ya later.
354
00:11:31,660 --> 00:11:33,526
- Where you going?
- To dinner.
355
00:11:33,528 --> 00:11:34,612
[scoffs] I'm cooking.
356
00:11:34,614 --> 00:11:36,525
Actually, we're cooking.
357
00:11:36,527 --> 00:11:37,916
Actually, we're bleeding.
358
00:11:37,918 --> 00:11:39,523
Mandy's taking me to dinner.
359
00:11:39,525 --> 00:11:40,785
What about homework?
360
00:11:40,787 --> 00:11:41,784
Don't have any.
361
00:11:41,786 --> 00:11:42,871
Can I go with y'all?
362
00:11:42,873 --> 00:11:44,737
I thought you were helping me cook.
363
00:11:44,740 --> 00:11:46,607
Hang on. Can I?
364
00:11:46,609 --> 00:11:48,129
No. It's girls' night.
365
00:11:48,131 --> 00:11:49,174
Bye.
366
00:11:51,824 --> 00:11:54,082
Might want to wash this one off.
367
00:11:54,085 --> 00:11:55,474
Oh.
368
00:11:55,476 --> 00:11:57,038
Any updates on Kevin?
369
00:11:57,040 --> 00:11:59,819
I did what you said and was
nothing but nice to Heather.
370
00:11:59,821 --> 00:12:01,210
Okay. How'd that go?
371
00:12:01,212 --> 00:12:02,427
So good.
372
00:12:02,429 --> 00:12:03,905
I found out she stuffs her bra.
373
00:12:03,907 --> 00:12:05,774
Huh. See? When the time is right,
374
00:12:05,776 --> 00:12:07,295
you can destroy her with that.
375
00:12:07,297 --> 00:12:09,076
That's gonna be a good day.
376
00:12:09,078 --> 00:12:10,859
And that trick isn't
just for middle school.
377
00:12:10,861 --> 00:12:13,074
That's something you can use
for the rest of your life.
378
00:12:13,076 --> 00:12:15,639
You are so wise.
379
00:12:15,641 --> 00:12:17,420
Well, I have lived a little.
380
00:12:17,422 --> 00:12:18,551
And so pretty.
381
00:12:18,553 --> 00:12:19,811
You should be on TV.
382
00:12:19,813 --> 00:12:21,723
Actually, when I lived in San Antonio,
383
00:12:21,725 --> 00:12:23,331
I was a weather girl.
384
00:12:23,333 --> 00:12:25,457
Oh, my God, you were a TV star?
385
00:12:25,460 --> 00:12:27,242
Monday through Friday, 5:00 a.m.,
386
00:12:27,244 --> 00:12:28,459
right before the farm report.
387
00:12:28,461 --> 00:12:30,111
Okay, you're, like, my new hero.
388
00:12:30,113 --> 00:12:32,158
Oh, stop. You could
totally be a weather girl.
389
00:12:32,161 --> 00:12:35,152
No. They're all perfect
and blonde. Like you.
390
00:12:35,154 --> 00:12:36,890
Anybody can be blonde.
391
00:12:36,892 --> 00:12:38,847
[scoffs] You think
Madonna's really blonde?
392
00:12:38,849 --> 00:12:40,410
What?
393
00:12:40,412 --> 00:12:41,714
[whispers]: She's a brunette.
394
00:12:41,716 --> 00:12:43,800
What about her Blond Ambition Tour?
395
00:12:43,802 --> 00:12:46,973
Ha. More like Bottle
Blond Ambition Tour.
396
00:12:46,975 --> 00:12:48,885
Funny and beautiful.
397
00:12:48,887 --> 00:12:51,104
No wonder my brother put a baby in you.
398
00:12:53,016 --> 00:12:55,058
♪
399
00:12:56,847 --> 00:12:58,019
What's wrong?
400
00:12:58,022 --> 00:12:59,402
Zero.
401
00:12:59,404 --> 00:13:01,185
Zero is wrong?
402
00:13:01,187 --> 00:13:03,780
Zero doesn't exist.
403
00:13:03,783 --> 00:13:05,096
I don't understand.
404
00:13:05,098 --> 00:13:06,464
Neither do we.
405
00:13:06,467 --> 00:13:08,877
Dr. Linkletter, there's
no such thing as zero.
406
00:13:08,879 --> 00:13:11,223
That's preposterous. Of course there is.
407
00:13:11,225 --> 00:13:13,353
Prove it, tough guy.
408
00:13:13,355 --> 00:13:14,527
[stammers]
409
00:13:14,529 --> 00:13:17,655
♪
410
00:13:17,657 --> 00:13:19,005
Uh-oh.
411
00:13:20,656 --> 00:13:22,392
[retches, coughs]
412
00:13:22,394 --> 00:13:24,307
May I have that?
413
00:13:26,828 --> 00:13:28,783
[retches loudly]
414
00:13:29,626 --> 00:13:30,782
Over here.
415
00:13:37,301 --> 00:13:38,708
Uh-oh.
416
00:13:43,087 --> 00:13:44,158
[footsteps approaching]
417
00:13:44,161 --> 00:13:45,146
Let me see.
418
00:13:45,148 --> 00:13:46,932
- It's bad.
- Just stay calm.
419
00:13:46,934 --> 00:13:47,978
I'm sure it's fine.
420
00:13:47,980 --> 00:13:49,329
It's the end of my life.
421
00:13:49,331 --> 00:13:50,899
Just show me.
422
00:13:54,908 --> 00:13:57,432
[exhales] Oh, my.
423
00:13:57,434 --> 00:13:59,611
That is... something.
424
00:13:59,613 --> 00:14:01,604
I can probably be homeschooled, right?
425
00:14:02,750 --> 00:14:04,287
It's okay. We can fix this.
426
00:14:04,290 --> 00:14:05,580
Before my parents get home?
427
00:14:05,582 --> 00:14:06,712
They're gonna kill me.
428
00:14:06,715 --> 00:14:07,976
Oh, man.
429
00:14:07,978 --> 00:14:09,632
Look at your head.
430
00:14:09,634 --> 00:14:11,593
- Shut up!
- Georgie, don't make this worse.
431
00:14:11,595 --> 00:14:13,248
- There's worse?
- [door opens]
432
00:14:13,250 --> 00:14:14,920
- GEORGE SR.: Anyone home?
- [door closes]
433
00:14:14,923 --> 00:14:16,777
Okay, stay here. We'll stall him.
434
00:14:16,779 --> 00:14:18,607
Do you see her head?
435
00:14:18,609 --> 00:14:20,184
GEORGE SR.: Oh.
436
00:14:20,187 --> 00:14:22,572
Hey. What's up?
437
00:14:22,574 --> 00:14:24,968
Nothing. Nada. Absolutely nothing.
438
00:14:24,970 --> 00:14:27,234
Where are the kids?
439
00:14:27,236 --> 00:14:30,589
Well, I believe Sheldon's at Billy's.
440
00:14:30,591 --> 00:14:32,506
Oh, good. He's helping him.
441
00:14:32,508 --> 00:14:34,554
- Mm.
- And Missy?
442
00:14:34,556 --> 00:14:35,904
Missy...
443
00:14:35,906 --> 00:14:37,690
That's a good question.
444
00:14:37,692 --> 00:14:39,172
I haven't seen her.
445
00:14:39,174 --> 00:14:43,182
I have not seen her, personally, myself.
446
00:14:44,184 --> 00:14:45,492
Okay.
447
00:14:49,760 --> 00:14:50,848
[door closes]
448
00:14:50,851 --> 00:14:52,112
We're a good team, me and you.
449
00:14:52,114 --> 00:14:54,683
Oh, not now, Georgie.
450
00:14:54,685 --> 00:14:57,078
I'm afraid I have some bad news.
451
00:14:57,080 --> 00:14:59,940
If you mean I'm gonna
be left back, it's okay.
452
00:14:59,943 --> 00:15:00,987
You tried.
453
00:15:00,990 --> 00:15:02,787
No. Well, maybe.
454
00:15:02,789 --> 00:15:04,617
I have bad news about zero.
455
00:15:04,619 --> 00:15:06,010
It doesn't exist.
456
00:15:06,012 --> 00:15:07,550
So I was right?
457
00:15:07,553 --> 00:15:09,285
No one is more shocked than I am.
458
00:15:09,288 --> 00:15:11,544
I can't help you with your test.
459
00:15:11,546 --> 00:15:14,114
Without zero, I don't even
know what math is anymore.
460
00:15:14,116 --> 00:15:15,334
Hmm.
461
00:15:15,336 --> 00:15:17,207
Yeah. Hmm.
462
00:15:17,209 --> 00:15:20,606
What if we just pretend it exists?
463
00:15:20,608 --> 00:15:23,481
Are you saying to accept
zero as an act of faith?
464
00:15:23,483 --> 00:15:24,583
Was I?
465
00:15:24,586 --> 00:15:25,936
I think so.
466
00:15:25,939 --> 00:15:27,185
Okay.
467
00:15:27,187 --> 00:15:29,102
My mom accepts God as an act of faith,
468
00:15:29,104 --> 00:15:31,498
and zero is way more useful than God.
469
00:15:31,501 --> 00:15:34,044
- Do not say that around Pastor Jeff.
- Think about it.
470
00:15:34,047 --> 00:15:35,614
Without zero, we wouldn't have calculus.
471
00:15:35,616 --> 00:15:38,011
Without God, we wouldn't
have Spanish Inquisition.
472
00:15:38,014 --> 00:15:40,212
I know the Spanish word for "fajita."
473
00:15:40,214 --> 00:15:41,955
And don't forget... before the Big Bang,
474
00:15:41,957 --> 00:15:43,436
there was actually nothing.
475
00:15:43,438 --> 00:15:44,700
It's "fajita."
476
00:15:44,702 --> 00:15:46,792
So you could say the entire universe
477
00:15:46,794 --> 00:15:48,350
was born out of zero.
478
00:15:48,353 --> 00:15:51,061
Meaning that zero created
the universe, not God.
479
00:15:51,063 --> 00:15:53,065
Maybe we should pray to it.
480
00:15:53,067 --> 00:15:54,766
I think we should.
481
00:15:56,414 --> 00:15:58,416
Zero, it's me, Sheldon.
482
00:15:58,419 --> 00:16:00,082
I know I doubted you, but in my defense,
483
00:16:00,085 --> 00:16:01,474
you're literally nothing.
484
00:16:01,476 --> 00:16:04,142
I would like to thank you for
all the gifts you've given us...
485
00:16:04,145 --> 00:16:06,354
The null set, Fibonacci sequence,
486
00:16:06,356 --> 00:16:07,704
binary language.
487
00:16:07,706 --> 00:16:09,709
I could go on ad infinitum,
488
00:16:09,711 --> 00:16:10,972
but not without you.
489
00:16:10,974 --> 00:16:13,369
[whispers]: Ask Zero
to help me pass my test.
490
00:16:13,371 --> 00:16:15,591
Zero's not magic. You
still have to study.
491
00:16:15,594 --> 00:16:17,551
Oh. Then I'm going back to Jesus.
492
00:16:17,553 --> 00:16:19,579
Jesus, please help me.
493
00:16:19,582 --> 00:16:22,371
I'm already the biggest
kid in sixth grade.
494
00:16:23,566 --> 00:16:24,609
Amen.
495
00:16:24,611 --> 00:16:26,962
Amen.
496
00:16:26,964 --> 00:16:29,317
[TV playing indistinctly]
497
00:16:31,582 --> 00:16:33,074
Hello? Who's in there?
498
00:16:33,077 --> 00:16:34,513
MISSY: Me.
499
00:16:34,516 --> 00:16:36,147
I need to use the bathroom.
500
00:16:36,150 --> 00:16:37,762
Give me a minute.
501
00:16:39,554 --> 00:16:41,034
[sighs]
502
00:16:41,037 --> 00:16:43,968
Can someone give me a
hand with these groceries?
503
00:16:43,971 --> 00:16:45,319
Sure. Dad, come on.
504
00:16:45,322 --> 00:16:46,930
[stammers] I got to go to the bathroom.
505
00:16:46,933 --> 00:16:48,355
Hey, Mandy.
506
00:16:48,357 --> 00:16:49,636
Mrs. Cooper.
507
00:16:49,639 --> 00:16:51,884
What brings you here?
508
00:16:51,886 --> 00:16:54,149
Just saying hi to Georgie.
509
00:16:54,151 --> 00:16:56,242
Why, hello to you, too.
510
00:16:57,680 --> 00:16:59,293
Let's get a move on.
511
00:17:02,560 --> 00:17:03,866
Oh, boy.
512
00:17:03,868 --> 00:17:05,652
Damn it, Missy. I'm two seconds away
513
00:17:05,654 --> 00:17:07,787
from peeing in your
mother's prayer garden.
514
00:17:07,789 --> 00:17:10,444
Look what I found.
515
00:17:10,446 --> 00:17:11,838
What the hell?
516
00:17:11,840 --> 00:17:14,104
Melissa Cooper, what did you do?
517
00:17:14,106 --> 00:17:17,328
Yeah. What did you do?
518
00:17:17,330 --> 00:17:18,722
- Yeah.
- [door closes]
519
00:17:18,724 --> 00:17:19,986
Good news. I think Billy
520
00:17:19,988 --> 00:17:21,903
might pass his math test tomorrow.
521
00:17:21,905 --> 00:17:23,689
There's a math test tomorrow?
522
00:17:23,691 --> 00:17:25,258
Your hair is upsetting me.
523
00:17:25,260 --> 00:17:27,239
Screw it. I'm going outside.
524
00:17:28,352 --> 00:17:29,282
[door slams]
525
00:17:35,213 --> 00:17:36,842
[quietly]: You can
cheat off me if you want.
526
00:17:36,844 --> 00:17:38,004
I studied.
527
00:17:38,007 --> 00:17:39,556
[whispers]: Thanks.
528
00:17:40,727 --> 00:17:43,307
ADULT SHELDON: I'm not
saying it was God or zero,
529
00:17:43,310 --> 00:17:45,796
but a small miracle did happen that day.
530
00:17:45,799 --> 00:17:48,276
Billy passed the test with a 68
531
00:17:48,279 --> 00:17:50,920
and went on to the seventh grade.
532
00:17:50,922 --> 00:17:53,589
Where he remained for
the next several years.
533
00:17:53,592 --> 00:18:00,659
- Synced and corrected by VitoSilans -
-- www.Addic7ed.com --
35189
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