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Previously on "Station 19"...

We found
him in the closet.

He likely got disoriented
trying to get out.

I'm ordering you to
wait for the aid car.

Due respect, sir, but no. No?

I'm gonna save his life instead.

I can get this
house in order, sir.

You need someone
who can unite them.

And that someone is me.

You don't love me, Jack.

We're gonna go to California,

and you're gonna stay here.

And we'll always have
love for you, Jack.

This is you.

You did this.

What happened?

Captain Bishop has been
relieved of her duties.

Yeah, Phoenix!

Let's hear it
for the Phoenix Fair!

Two days down,
two days to go.

- Guys!
- Take a selfie with me.

Come on, it's a
celebration of life

and... and survival and vaccines

and the ability to
gather together again

and to hug and be human.

Come on.

You're right.
Seattle has risen.

What's to hate?

Stilt walkers.

I hate stilt walkers.

Same.

Yeah, pub crawlers.
I really hate pub crawlers.

Ooh, crowds.
I hate crowds.

I hate drunk crowds,
hot, sweaty crowds.

Just, you know,
crowds in general.

- Yeah.
- Awful.

You know
what I kind of hate?

I kind of hate fireworks.

Hmm?

They're environmentally
catastrophic,

and they torture dogs.

Yeah, I hate people who point
out the flaws in fireworks.

I didn't say it
wasn't a good show.

Ben: Whoa!

- Ohh!
- Yay!

- Yeah.
- Right on cue.

Okay, okay.

Okay, there's a good
chance that tomorrow is gonna be

another busy day.

Let's try to get some sleep.

Oh, nothing? Nothing.

Yeah.

Hey, um...

when do we forgive him?

Come on.
It's... It's awkward.

Alright? It's painful.

I mean, it's... it's...
It's destroying team unity.

Or, at the very
least, it's destroying

my personal team unity.

Then you personally
should forgive him.

Okay, when you forgive
him, we all forgive him.

Until then, he just
sits all alone.

That's how it works.

Look, you know
that's how it works.

Bishop.

Are you in a wedding dress?

Yes, sir. I am in
a wedding dress,

because I came here
from my wedding.

I married this
extraordinary woman,

and it was the happiest
moment of my life,

and then I got your
absurdly sexist e-mail,

and it threatened
to ruin my night,

but I didn't let it, sir.

I came here instead, but
Bishop, you were suspended

for insubordination
and breaking protocols.

If you think that you
can get out of that

by crying sexism, you
got another thing co...

I'm not cryingsexism, sir.

I am shining a light on it

in the hopes of
creating real change.

All due respect, Chief,
my father, Pruitt Herrera,

was written up for
insubordination

on several occasions, but he
was never relieved of his duty.

That's not pertinent to
this... I-I am speaking.

Oh. I can list off a
dozen male fire captains

I know personally who
stepped out of line

and stepped on toes every
day of their career,

and they never even
got written up.

She refused a direct order.

Yes, sir, but the alternative

was to let an injured
child die on the street.

Yeah, and that child,
by the way, lived...

This is not how we do
things at the SFD, Bishop.

But it is, sir.

At SFD, we fight
for what's right.

It's how my father raised me.

It's how he raised every
firefighter at Station 19.

My team won't accept
my demotion, sir.

Idon't accept it.

I work too hard for my job
and I am too damn good at it.

Plus, it is my wedding day,

so you don't get to
steal my job or my joy,

at least not without a fight.

Okay.

Okay.

You can keep 19, Bishop.

Herrera, I'm reassigning you to
23, effective immediately. What?

Bishop, if your entire
team... Sir. No.

Is incapable of respecting
the chain of command,

then they need a reminder about
how this department works.

I'll have all of them
reassigned within a week.

Sir, I... Or...

Or you can step down... Mm!

And I'll appoint a new captain,

pending completion
of the investigation

of your insubordination
and protocol defiance.

And just for the record,

I am glad that kid lived,

but if he had died
on your engine,

the lawsuit could have put the
whole station out of business.

I'll step down pending
investigation, sir.

Good call.

Congratulations
on your nuptials.

You know, sir, if I may,

Herrera would be the best
interim captain at 19.

Except Herrera's already
been transferred.

She's reporting for duty at
23 Monday morning. Sir...

What? Herrera, you are
a good firefighter,

but as long as you keep
invoking your father's name,

you will never get
out of his shadow.

This move will be good for you.

My decision's final.

Captain Beckett? Warren.

You don't like fireworks?

I love them, 'cause they mean
I get the gym all to myself.

I tryto like him.Same.

I don't. I gave up.

Call me a quitter.

Quitter.

That's really funny.

It's right there! I'm
just saying. Thank you.

And she goes, "If you
hoist me up there,

I can change the
battery myself."

But the way she
says "hoist..."

Ooh, she does
not mean "hoist."

She does not mean hoist.

Hi, there. I'm
looking for Herrera.

She's in the junkyard gym.

Thanks. Yep.

It was a misguided decision

to storm the Chief's office.

Um, so, yeah.

But that does not mean that
he gets to steal our joy.

What happened?

I was trying to tell you
not to go into his office.

I tried to undo what you did.

And instead, I got transferred.

What? Yeah, I got transferred.

I no longer work at 19.

But you know what? My best
friend just got married tonight

and she's trying to
salvage her wedding,

so I'm gonna dance,
because unlike you,

I care about people
other than myself.

I tried to tell you not to go.

Yeah, but you know what?
It's for the best. Because...

I don't want to work
with you anymore.

I don't want to anything
with you anymore.

Nice. That's it.

Here you go.

You have a minute?

I'm spotting.

Yeah, I can see that.

Maybe next time,

call before you just
show up where I work.

It's been 10 months.

How long do you
expect me to wait

for you to have a conversation?

I don't expect anything
from you at all.

You know, I can just wait.

That would be great.
Thanks, man. Thanks.

Yeah, okay. I'll just...

We're married.

We took vows. I
take them seriously.

And you're couch surfing
for almost a year?

I have a lot of good
friends who are loyal to me

and enjoy having me around.

It hasn't been a hardship.

You're not a teenager, Andy!
And I'm not your father.

You don't just run away!

No, I didn't run.

I walked.

So how come you haven't
filed for divorce yet?

Because you love me.

And I've been waiting
because I love you.

The phoenix rises from the
ashes of its own demise.

We can rise.

I work at a station
where I'm the only woman.

I work at a station where no one

does their laundry often enough,

and everything, including
dinner, smells like feet.

I work at a station
that is not my home.

My job is just a job now.

You did that.

I did not do that.

Youdid that.

If that's what you still think,

then we aren't a
phoenix, Robert.

We're just a pile of ash.

Hey, step right up
and take a picture

with a pretty firefighter.

Can you not? Can I not what?

You know, I'm an
Olympian, and just...

There are better
words to describe me.

Step right up and take a picture

with a pretty
Olympian firefighter.

Wow.

Hi.

Man on PA: For your convenience,
booths, stalls, and picnic tables

are located at the north
end of the fairgrounds.

It's unnatural, man.

Can't be any weirder than
an "undies bike race."

It definitely is.

How's your program going?

It's not myprogram.

It's for all of us.

A program within
the fire department

to respond to
nonviolent emergencies

with a team of nonviolent
first responders.

No cops, no guns.

Just a team of first responders

trained to de-escalate
any situation.

I-I don't need a sales
pitch. They're trained...

You've been talking about
it for months. I'm on board.

Then why do you keep
calling it my program?

'Cause you're paying
for it. Not for long.

I'm only funding
the pilot program

with the settlement money,

but once the city sees
how many lives it saves,

it's got to fund it with at
least the same enthusiasm

as... stilt walkers.

Anyway, what's up with you, bro?

I know how you are when you're
on board with something,

and this isn't it. I'm on board.

And...

B team has been grumbling
that you're adding extra

to the workload
without any extra pay.

Well, the world doesn't change

unless we change it, bro.

That's what I told them.

And also tell them that there
will eventually be extra pay.

There... There will be.

Will do.

Hey, what name did you land on?

Crisis One.

Ooh. Yeah. Yeah.

No, it's like an action
movie. I like it.

That's why I like it.

Hey.

There.

Fireworks. Illegal fireworks.

I hate them even more
than the other kind.

Last one there has to ride
in the undies bike race.

No, no!

Hey.

It's a drunken make out, man.

It's a drunken make
out at a wedding.

Everyone knows that nothing
that happens at weddings count.

I'm saying you should
tell... You need to tell her.

Tell her before she
gets in too deep.

He's just a guy. You're,
like, her favorite person.

It's okay. It's okay.

I'm okay.

Chicken.

I'm not a...

I'm not a chicken.

What are you doing?

Stop that.

I'm gonna keep doing
this until you tell her,

because I'm a good
friend.

Okay. Okay. Okay! Okay!

What would you do if I told
you I was in love with you?

Was not expecting that. Uh...

Flattered.

It's a hypothetical,
man. Come on.

Whew.

I don't know, man.

It would be weird
for a while, right?

Yeah. And then I would tell you

that I know I look
good in a suit.

Okay.

But I'm just not into men.

And then what?

Yeah, and then it would be...

Probably be awkward for a while.

And you would start to avoid me.

I might leave when you
come into the shower,

but that's only because
I don't want to tempt you

with this bodacious bod.

Exactly.

These rippling abs.

It would be weird, and you
would start to avoid me.

Then you would start to
change how you talk to me.

You would start to change what
you do or say in front of me,

and I'd stop being your
brother and start being

somebody that you
have to manage.

When I saw Vic outside
and that dude's tongue

down her throat, I...

Yeah, bro, I felt a little sick.

I felt a little heartbroken,

and honestly, I felt
a lot of relief.

She doesn't feel
the same way I feel,

and I-I don't want to become
someone that she has to manage.

I'm afraid I'm gonna
be alone my whole life.

Inara's leaving.

Everyone leaves.

It's kind of my thing, right?

It's like this
cycle I can't break,

and I hate it.

I hate being alone.

So when I hear about you
being in love with Hughes

and you're not gonna
do anything about it,

you're not gonna reach for that?

I don't get that, man.
I don't understand.

If you love her, like...

I love her a little bit, man.

Like...

I'm in love with her enough
to never let her know.

I'm the phoenix!

- I'm the phoenix!
- Oh, man.

Seattle Fire Department.

Step away from the
fireworks! I'm the phoenix!

Hey, sir!

No, no, no, no, no!

Aah! Aah!

- Aah!
- Hey!

Ohh.

This is Firefighter
Montgomery, Station 19.

I'm in the park near
the back of Lot A.

We have a male, early 20s.

Severe facial trauma.
Need an aid car.

This is Captain Bishop,
Station 19. We have a...

Again, Bishop? Really? Sorry.

This is Captain
Beckett, Station 19.

We have a traumatic injury

near the end of
Berninger Park, Lot A.

Need an aid car now.

Hey, hey. Whoa.

A firework went off in his face!

Okay, hey, listen.

We've called an aid car.
They're on their way.

His face is blown
off. He needs help.

The ambulance is on its way.
Don't let him die! Please!

He's not gonna die. It's okay.
It's okay. Hey, wait, wait.

Hey, listen.Hey.

Hey, I got you,
man! Hey, listen!

Listen, okay?! I got you!

We are going to help him.

Station 19 is 3
minutes away, okay?

Illegal fireworks! Some
guy just blew his face off.

I need the medical bag from
the rig.

Hey!

No, no! Stop!

Did you leave the
rig open, Captain?

No, no, no!

Hey, what do you
think are the chances

I can get Miller to work the
PRT into the Crisis One program?

You know, I mean, bring
her back from the dead,

so to speak.

There are all sorts
of possibilities

if we get some real funding.

Sullivan?

Sullivan?

Sullivan.

Hmm?

Where's your head at, man?

Nowhere good.

What is this?

Festival traffic?

Nah, nah, this is...

Hey, this is Ben
Warren on Aid Car 19.

Traffic is at a full stop.

I can't move.

That bandana's soaking through.

Can anyone spare a T-shirt?

Here. Here, here. Is he
gonna die? He can't die!

No, no, no. He's just
losing consciousness

because of the pain. Or
maybe he has brain damage.

Can you just not...

This is Firefighter Montgomery.
What's the ETA on that aid car?

Traffic is stopped in every
direction, Montgomery,

because your guy's
buddies stole the rig

and dumped it in
the intersection.

What? What do we do?

Wow. Okay. Dean: Here.

I got this from
the fire jugglers.

What am I supposed
to do with this?

Fine, I'll take it back.

How are you?

I'm gonna help you
with your ankle, okay?

Grey-Sloan
is six blocks away.

Can you transport
the patient by foot?

What is he, like, 250? No.

Hey, what is his name?

Brad. Okay, Brad?

Hey, Brad.

Brad, can you walk?

No.

No, he's not walking. No. No.

Yeah, we can do it.

We just need an extra set
of hands and a gurney.

Copy. Stand by.

Will, can you hear me?

Hey, buddy. Will?

Are you able to move your
arms or sit up? Will?

What's his status?

He's breathing, but
severely altered.

We're gonna need to remove
the windshield to get him out.

Copy. Stand by.

Barnes! Hey,
this is Warren.

Aid Car 19 is still stuck

outside the entrance
to the park.

I got a ton of cars
in every direction.

Warren, abandon ship.

Grab the gurney
and the backboard,

meet Montgomery in
the park near Lot A.

You're gonna have to
transport the patient

to Grey-Sloan on foot.

Go ahead. I'll stay
with the aid car.

And try to park it.

All due respect,

I kind of think
everyone's wondering

why you're still here.

I'm waiting for
my wife to realize

that I didn't try
to get Bishop's job.

It was me who promoted
Bishop to captain.

I wasn't trying to get
her fired, alright?

I was trying to save 19.

You know, you can stare
at me all you want.

I know what I said,

and I know what I did.

I'm a man of honor.

If I wanted to get Bishop's job,

I wouldn't have shown
up to her wedding.

Did I recognize an
opportunity? Yeah.

Am I ambitious? Yeah.

But did I push for her
to get suspended? No.

That was already happening.

Okay, um...

Y-You're... You're
drinking

club soda, yeah.

And I-I-I admire you for that,

but I have had many whiskeys.

Too many whiskeys.

Enough whiskeys that I'm
going to tell you the truth,

even though I know I'm gonna
regret it in the morning.

Okay.

Okay.

Here's the truth.

I'm ambitious.

I know what ambition looks like.

You know, it means that you...

You know where you
are on the mountain

and you know where
you want to go,

and where you want to go is
higher than where you are,

so you climb.

But ruthless...

Ruthless means that you will
push somebody out of your way

if they're slowing you down.

If they fall off the
edge of the cliff,

well hey,
that's their fault,

'cause, you know, they should
have worn better shoes.

You don't stop to help
them 'cause, you know,

you got your eye on the
top of that mountain,

'cause that's all that matters.

Look, I think that you are a man
of honor, Robert, in many ways.

You... You... You
fought for our country.

I admire that.

You're an incredible
firefighter.

No one can say that you're not.

You are a strong
leader, no doubt.

I believe that you
love your wife,

your team, and your country,

but you have a ruthless streak.

Until you own that,

you're never gonna
be able to change it.

Yep. Too many whiskeys.

Should have left with my wife.

You know, listen,
let me tell you something.

You've never been married
and betrayed, so...

Uh-huh.

Can I get a water?

Hey, be safe out there.
Temps are rising.

We have a shade tent,
too, if you need it.

Look, I'm not saying
you got to get over it,

like, stop being mad.

I'm saying that if
you're still that mad

after all this time, you
got to make a change.

Bro, we took vows.

My mom would kill
me for saying this,

but even Maricella
Gloriana Jimenez Ruiz,

who goes to church
six days a week,

wouldn't want someone to stay
married to someone they hated.

Bitterness does not
a good Catholic make.

Who says I'm Catholic?

You don't have to go to
church to have that guilt

etched into your DNA.

Hey, is your mom here now?

Or is she still in Puerto Rico?

She's in Nicaragua,

actually, with my dad's family.

Oh. Yeah, after he died,

she says it helps her
still feel close to him.

Mm.

Hey, Centroamérica
all up in SFD.

You know it! You know it! Ey!

Ey! Ey! Ey! Ey! Ey!

I

I'm not staying with
him out of guilt.

Then what?

I... You know, it's...

O-kay.

Hey, man. Hey, guys. Hey.

How's it going? Dixon.

What the hell are you wearing?

Oh, yeah, well...

I was gonna do the
undies bike race,

but then I sort
of chickened out.

Really, though?

'Cause I think this pretty
much counts as undies.

Wait, these... these
are bike shorts,

thank you very much.

Does, uh...

Does Travis know that you're
doing the undies bike race?

No. I'm gonna surprise him.

Ah.Okay!

Well, that'll be a big surprise.

Yeah, I need to see
that. It'll be something.

19 has some injuries
and a situation

with their engine and aid car.

What? What do you
mean, "situation"?

Check in with Captain Beckett

at the southeast corner of the
park, see how you can help.

Okay. On it.

Okay.

Aren't you Michael Dixon's kid?

Yeah. Yep.

Making my dad proud.

I'm just... I'm
gonna... I gotta...

What is he saying?

I'm pretty sure he
said "rainbow cupcake,"

but it could also be
literally anything else.

Do you know if
he's on something?

What? Oh, please don't
play dumb with me.

I'm not a cop, okay?
I just need to...

He's on shrooms.

I know that's stupid,

I know he's dressed like a bird,

and I know that the fireworks
were a really bad idea,

but I've been depressed.

Because I got used
to being alone

and because I don't know how
to be in the world anymore.

And Brad basically dragged
me out of my house.

He said, "Tara,
you have to live.

Even though it's uncomfortable,
you have to live.

You have to celebrate
that you survived,

because so many
people didn't."

Watch your backs, folks!
Gurney coming through! Move!

Thank God.

No, no, no.

Hey, hey, hey, hey,
hey. Okay, okay, okay.

Alright, alright, alright,
alright. Stay down.

You're alright. You're
okay. You're okay.

See? Don't do drugs, kids.

That was terrifying.

Alright, let me get
in there. Oh, wow.

God, what...
what... What happened?

Is one of us in there?

No, rogue drunk
grabbed the wheel.

19 is safe. Working
on the drunk.

Aquino said there
was a second trauma.

Up there a ways. Hughes
and Montgomery are there.

Anybody worried about that?

About what?

Brad, don't die! I
love you! Don't die!

Can someone move her?

Yeah. Tara, Tara.
Come here, come here.

I need you to slow
down your breathing

so you don't
hyperventilate, okay?

Put your head between your legs.

Hey, hey! You, you!
Slow down, slow down.

Hey. Give me that.

Hey!

Sorry. You're helping
save a life, dude.

I-I never told him
I love him! Here.

He doesn't know I love
him! I need to tell him!

Okay, okay. Breathe into this.

Be careful of that port.

Hey. Do you need my help?

Emmett. Yeah?

You're naked. No, I'm not.

Let's roll him on
one, two, three.

Yeah. Where do you need me?

Right there is fine.

Whew.

You know, if Travis
changes his mind...

He's not going to.

Yeah, but I'm
saying if he does...

If he does, I mean,

at least we both got laid.

That's right. That's right.

Pretty good, too.

Yeah.

I haven't stopped
thinking about you...

all these months.

Wow.

I mean, that's
gonna be a problem.

Oh, a problem?

Yeah, well, how am
I ever gonna live up

to this idealized version
of me that you've created

in your own imagination?

I mean...

yeah, you're right.

Forget it. I'm out of here.

Stop! Stop.

Life is weird.

Yeah.

I mean, it's so much weirder
than anyone tells you

when you sign up for it.

When you sign up for it?

I mean, they can't
tell you, right?

Who would... Who
would incarnate?

Who would go from
spirit to human form?

Who would volunteer
for this insanity?

I mean, the man responsible
for my husband's death

is currently sleeping
with my roommate

in what used to be
his own bedroom.

It's weird.

Are you okay?

I am. Yeah?

I am.

Which is also very, very weird.

Well, I would sign up for it.

Really? Yeah.

I mean, you know,
if God or whoever

showed me a picture of this,

of you in this moment,

in this light, I'd
sign up for it.

Really? If... If...

If God was like,
"Hey, uh, so, listen,

your whole church and
pretty much all of society,

they're gonna try and
gaslight you into believing

that the way you experience
love is not only wrong

but a terrible sin,
and you're gonna have

to suffer through
decades of self-loathing

until hopefully, maybe, you
make it out the other side.

Also, people that you
love are going to die,

tragically and without warning,

and the parents that
bring you into the world,

they'll ultimately not
understand you at all"...

You would sign up for that?

Yes. Yeah.

I would.

Because I-I had to claw my way

out of what society
wanted me to be.

You know, what my
dad wanted me to be.

I had to fight to
live my life this way,

and that

I mean, that... That
just makes it sweeter.

You know? That... That
makes this moment sweeter.

And I would not
trade this moment.

Okay, so, you see,
I'm being, um...

existential and cynical
right now... Mm.

Because I'm afraid
of pain, and you,

you are being, um...

sweet and romantic
and beautiful.

You are so beautiful,

and I am so afraid that I'm
signing up for more pain.

Look.

You were the one
who asked for this.

I know.

You said you wanted it.

I did. I-I do.

Yeah?

I do.

I do.

What's the holdup with the leak?

The Class B foam
is on our engine

in a compartment that just saw
the business end of that truck.

So you're just gonna let
the risk of a fuel explosion

loom over the scene? I
asked for a backup engine,

and 23's right
around the corner,

but with all these Okay,
but... but traffic.

Can they come across the park?

A couple hundred drunk folks

would have to walk in
an orderly fashion.

Okay, so what's your plan?

Hope it doesn't blow up.

Yeah, I said a prayer to
St. Francis and everything.

You know, this engine
means a lot to this team.

Not to mention the
civilian inside.

You know, now I know
what McCallister

meant about you, Sullivan.
And what's that, sir?

Olympian Bishop,

let's see if you've
still got it.

We need to get up and in there.

Are you serious? Yeah,
it's like climbing a tree.

It's a fuel leak.
It's not safe.

What's youridea?

Alright, I'll do it.

No, we got it.
Bishop, I'm with you.

- Herrera...
- Sullivan, I still outrank you.

Oh, burn.

Emmett, can you ride up ahead,
kind of act like a siren,

see if you can clear a path?

Okay.

Not... Not an actual siren.

You can use words.

Got it. Okay.

Look, gonna need all hands

to lift this thing
over the curbs,

and pay attention to the crowd,
'cause they are drunk and high

and we don't want
to run them over.

You have to live! Please
live! Alright. Let's go.

You have to live! Okay.

Tara, you've got
to breathe, okay?

Just calm down. I'll
stay with her a minute.

Thank you. Love you.

- Wait, what?
- I love him.

I love him.

I hear you. I-I love her.

I need to tell him.

You want to go to the hospital?

I hurt my ankle.

Come on.

Come on. We can walk
to the hospital.

Put your arm around
me. I got you.

Baby steps. Baby steps.

Will, stay with us, buddy.

You got it?

Will? Buddy.

Okay.

We got him.

All clear.

Bishop, Herrera, you're up.

Okay.

Okay, I'm up.

Come on! Bishop, Herrera,
let's get that foam!

You know, I'd be fine
living the rest of my life

not hearing that man
say my last name.

Why do I think he's kind of hot?

'Cause you have a thing for
patronizing authority figures.

Fair.

Alright, hey, hey, hey, hey!

Slow down. Slow
down, everybody.

Do not come any
closer. Stay there.

Stand back. Stand
back, please!

Hey! Hey!

No! No!

Bishop, Herrera! Move!

What?

Jump down! Jump!

Jump! Come on!

Sorry, Herrera.
That's a tough sight.

How is he? Is he okay?

He's being evaluated, and
he'll likely need surgery.

But he'll be okay?

Look, I'll take you
to the front desk,

and they can give you updates,

and we can get that
ankle looked at.

Thank you. Come on.

Good luck, huh?

So you love me, huh?

Huh? Um, no.

That was... I'm sorry.
That was like, um...

That was just like, you know,
like, "Bye, Mom. Love you."

Oh. You know how you just...

Right, okay. Right?
You just say it.

Right, right. You know? Right?

So you love me like your mom.

Yeah. Shut up.Sure.

Shut... Shut up.

What's up, Miller? You good?

Uh, I am, um...

What?

It's just that girl. You know?

I hope that she tells her friend
that she loves him, you know?

Oh. Yeah. I hope
she spits it out.

Yeah.
- Yeah.

I wonder if she'll still
love him when she realizes

they can't replace his cheek.

Travis, that is so shallow.

I amso shallow.

Cheekless people
deserve love, too.

Exactly. Oh, that settles it.

You two are meant
for each other.

Well, I have a committee meeting

I've got to run to,

so I'll meet you guys
back at the station.

Crisis One! Whoo-ooh!

Assemble! Go get
'em, Crisis One!

Crisis One! Yeah!

Beckett: Engine 19
fire nearly contained.

Montgomery, Hughes, report.

Did he just say
"Engine 19 fire"?

Yeah.

Hey! Beckett: This
is 23's scene now.

Look, that's ourrig.

Do they let you operate on
your own family, Warren?

That's not the same
thing, and you know it.

Oh, God, this is bad.

Maybe it'll rise from the ash.

No. There's no
rising from this.

I just never understood the
sentimentality, you know?

It's just a big hunk of
metal. We'll get another one.

How you got this job over
her, I'll never understand.

Who... Bishop?

Herrera.

This is her house.
She should be captain.

That's funny. I heard you were
gunning for the job yourself.

It's still weird, you know,
coming home without Herrera.

Yes, it is.

So what happens now?

Do we work without an engine
until we get a new one, or what?

They're gonna send
us a reserve rig.

Beckett: Line up. Now?

No, after you've had a
beauty nap, Montgomery.

Yes, now.

Eyes up.

You lost your rig.

That sucks.

The way I see it, you
have one of two choices...

You can drag your feet and pout,

or you can remember that
you are firefighters.

That you represent this city
and this exceptional department.

And you have the best
damn job in the world.

The engine can be replaced.

There was no loss of life today.

That is a good day.

Dismissed.

I'm sorry.

I-I'm sorry I went and
spoke to Chief McCallister.

I, um... thought I...

I convinced myself
that I was helping.

Instead, I was doing harm.

To you.

To you all.

To myself.

I'm sorry.

Thank you.

19.

- 19.
- 19.

- 19.
- 19.

My dad had this old beater...

A yellow Firebird.

It sucked so bad.

The exhaust was all twisted
up, so it would literally pump

carbon monoxide into the car.

I would get carsick every
time I rode in that thing

until they finally figured
out what was causing it.

You know, when he died,

I used to just sit in the
thing in the driveway.

It made me feel, like,
close to him, you know?

I crashed it driving
home one night.

I was fine, but the
car was

totaled.

And...

and it felt like I lost
him all over again.

I'm just saying, I get it,

and if you want to cry in
the shower or something,

I'll guard the door and
make it look like I'm not.

I married Robert too fast
because my dad was dying.

And, you know, watching
the engine go up in flames

when I'm not even part of
19 anymore felt like...

Like you lost the only
thing you had left of him?

No.

Because it's not the only
thing left of my dad.

My marriage is, in a
weird, twisted way,

and I guess I feel like
if I let go of that...

then what's left?

You.

You're left.

I lost my dad.

I lost my best friend.

And my station.

And my engine.
And my marriage.

And you're still standing.

You know what that means?

Hey.

It means you're the phoenix.

I rise.

You rise.

Uh, I told him I love
him over a gurney.

Why would I do that?

Uh, because you love him?

Yeah, I guess I do.

But, like, over a gurney?

Hughes, I have
something to say to you.

Oh, God. No.

Now.

No, I just... Yes, I said...

I said the word "ass"
in front of Pru,

and she did repeat
it a... few times,

and it was just...
It's not... Okay.

It was my fault, and
I just... I just...

taught your daughter
her first swear word,

and I'm so, so sorry, but I...
No, it's not that. Uh, I just...

Oh, also I said "craptastic,"
like, six times,

'cause I don't... For some
reason, it made her laugh.

Okay. Hughes, Hughes,
just... just...

She found that word
amusing... give me a second.

Uh...

I am...

I, um...

I am in, uh...

What?

I am in need of a conflict
resolution specialist

for Crisis One.

It's an unpaid position,
so it's been hard for me

to find somebody great,

but I think with some
training, you can be great,

because you are warm
and kind and very smart

and easy to be around

and people respond
to you really well,

even though you teach
babies how to swear now.

Are you asking me to be
a part of Crisis One?

Yes, I am asking you to
be a part of Crisis One.

Yeah. Yes.

Please. Of course.

I love that. I love you.

I love that you're doing this.

Ghaaa! God!

What is wrong with you?

Hmm?

Nuh-uh. Ah!

Ear... Inner-ear thing.

Ah! Ah!

Feels wrong to be in
here without the engine.

Feels wrong to be
in here without you.

I haven't filed for divorce yet

because I didn't
want Maya and Carina

to feel in any way responsible
for the end of our marriage

when they're just
beginning their own.

So I waited, and
I've been waiting.

Waiting to see if you would
get how wrong you were.

If... If you might
really apologize.

If you... If you
would really change.

I...

But you haven't.

But I have.

Robert. Robert. I... I...

I love you.

I do love you.

But I don't respect you.

And I can't forgive you.

So I called a divorce lawyer.

What?

He said it should
be pretty simple.

No kids, not many assets.

We made promises to each other
before God and my father.

But I believe that
both God and my father,

they would want me to be happy.

I believe that both
God and my father

understand that sometimes,
in a good, long life...

you change your mind.

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