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1
00:00:10,477 --> 00:00:14,631
("I Love Lucy" theme song playing)
2
00:00:31,481 --> 00:00:33,416
Oh, no, no, now, Dorothy, please.
3
00:00:33,917 --> 00:00:35,418
I want to do it for you.
4
00:00:35,418 --> 00:00:36,920
It's the only way.
5
00:00:36,920 --> 00:00:38,922
Now, look, you and Sam come over for
dinner tonight
6
00:00:38,922 --> 00:00:40,423
and just leave the rest to me.
7
00:00:40,423 --> 00:00:42,425
Oh, now, stop worrying about it.
8
00:00:42,425 --> 00:00:43,927
We'll have him in the trap
9
00:00:43,927 --> 00:00:45,929
before he knows what hit him.
10
00:00:45,929 --> 00:00:48,932
Yeah, well, you be here tonight at
7:00, okay?
11
00:00:48,932 --> 00:00:50,433
All right, bye-bye.
12
00:00:50,433 --> 00:00:52,352
Who are you trapping, this time,
Daniel Boone?
13
00:00:52,352 --> 00:00:53,853
Sam Carter, that fellow
14
00:00:53,853 --> 00:00:55,688
Dorothy Cooke's been going with for
such a long time.
15
00:00:56,189 --> 00:01:00,110
Oh, you mean she finally roped old
slippery Sam?
16
00:01:00,110 --> 00:01:02,112
Well, she's got the noose around his
neck.
17
00:01:02,612 --> 00:01:04,447
All she wants us to do is help her
tighten it.
18
00:01:04,447 --> 00:01:05,665
Us?
19
00:01:05,665 --> 00:01:07,083
Yeah.
20
00:01:07,083 --> 00:01:09,085
Oh, I don't know, I think I'm a
little rusty.
21
00:01:09,085 --> 00:01:11,955
It's been 25 years since I bagged fat
Freddie.
22
00:01:11,955 --> 00:01:13,923
Oh, nonsense.
23
00:01:13,923 --> 00:01:16,426
Getting a man is just like swimming.
24
00:01:16,426 --> 00:01:17,927
Once you learn, you never forget.
25
00:01:18,428 --> 00:01:19,929
Anyway, I have a plan.
26
00:01:19,929 --> 00:01:22,766
We are going to show Sam what it's
like to be married.
27
00:01:22,766 --> 00:01:25,718
First, I'm going to serve a delicious
home-cooked meal,
28
00:01:25,718 --> 00:01:29,222
and then we'll all tiptoe in and take
a look at the baby
29
00:01:29,222 --> 00:01:31,224
sleeping peacefully in his little
crib.
30
00:01:31,224 --> 00:01:32,725
And then we'll all come out here
31
00:01:32,725 --> 00:01:35,612
and sit around a big fire and listen
to romantic music.
32
00:01:35,612 --> 00:01:36,563
Oh, that'll be nice.
33
00:01:36,563 --> 00:01:37,564
Won't it?
34
00:01:38,064 --> 00:01:40,066
Yeah. When are you going to show him
35
00:01:40,066 --> 00:01:41,868
what it's like to be married?
36
00:01:43,703 --> 00:01:45,205
Now, Ethel.
37
00:01:45,205 --> 00:01:46,706
Look, Ricky and I will be
38
00:01:46,706 --> 00:01:48,708
a wonderful example of a young
married couple
39
00:01:48,708 --> 00:01:49,709
and you and Fred will be
40
00:01:50,210 --> 00:01:53,213
a wonderful example of an o... oh.
41
00:01:54,497 --> 00:01:56,966
You and Fred will be a wonderful
example
44
00:01:59,469 --> 00:02:00,303
Yeah?
45
00:02:00,303 --> 00:02:02,255
Well, you and Fred will be
46
00:02:02,755 --> 00:02:04,257
a wonderful example of a young couple
47
00:02:04,757 --> 00:02:06,259
who have been married 25 years.
48
00:02:06,259 --> 00:02:07,760
Oh.
49
00:02:07,760 --> 00:02:09,562
And are still madly in love with each
other.
50
00:02:09,562 --> 00:02:12,232
Me and Fred?!
51
00:02:12,232 --> 00:02:14,400
Well, look, for tonight, fake it.
52
00:02:14,400 --> 00:02:15,235
Okay, I'll try.
53
00:02:15,235 --> 00:02:16,236
All right.
54
00:02:16,236 --> 00:02:17,737
What's so special about tonight?
55
00:02:17,737 --> 00:02:19,739
She's had her hooks in Sam for three
years.
56
00:02:20,240 --> 00:02:21,241
I know it.
57
00:02:21,241 --> 00:02:22,742
But he's leaving for California
tomorrow morning.
58
00:02:23,243 --> 00:02:25,245
This is her last chance to reel him
in.
59
00:02:25,245 --> 00:02:27,247
Tell me something, Cupid.
60
00:02:27,247 --> 00:02:28,248
What?
61
00:02:28,248 --> 00:02:29,582
Does Ricky know about this?
62
00:02:29,582 --> 00:02:31,117
Of course not.
63
00:02:31,117 --> 00:02:33,620
And there's no need to tell him
either.
64
00:02:33,620 --> 00:02:36,122
Look, the evening will be over, Sam
will propose
65
00:02:36,122 --> 00:02:38,124
our mission will be accomplished
66
00:02:38,124 --> 00:02:39,626
and Ricky will never know
67
00:02:39,626 --> 00:02:42,128
he helped bring another bachelor to
his knees.
68
00:02:57,143 --> 00:02:58,645
Oh, hi, dear.
69
00:02:58,645 --> 00:03:00,146
Hello, honey.
70
00:03:00,146 --> 00:03:01,147
How's my little husband?
71
00:03:01,648 --> 00:03:02,649
Oh, not so good.
72
00:03:02,649 --> 00:03:03,650
Oh, what's the matter?
73
00:03:04,150 --> 00:03:05,151
I got a awful headache.
74
00:03:05,151 --> 00:03:06,152
Oh...
75
00:03:06,152 --> 00:03:07,153
What's all that?
76
00:03:07,654 --> 00:03:09,656
Oh, I just thought we'd have a cozy
little dinner.
77
00:03:09,656 --> 00:03:11,074
Just the four of us?
78
00:03:11,574 --> 00:03:13,076
What did you do?
79
00:03:13,076 --> 00:03:15,078
Get a girlfriend for little Ricky?
80
00:03:15,578 --> 00:03:17,580
No, Dorothy and Sam are coming over.
81
00:03:17,580 --> 00:03:18,581
Dorothy and Sam who?
82
00:03:19,082 --> 00:03:19,916
You know.
83
00:03:20,333 --> 00:03:25,088
Oh, you mean Dorothy Spider and Sam
Fly.
84
00:03:26,422 --> 00:03:28,641
Hasn't she got him in her parlor yet?
85
00:03:29,976 --> 00:03:31,978
I don't know what you're talking
about.
86
00:03:31,978 --> 00:03:33,479
Well, look, honey, why don't you call
it off?
87
00:03:33,479 --> 00:03:35,315
I'm not in the mood to see anybody
tonight.
88
00:03:35,315 --> 00:03:36,683
But, honey, I can't call it off.
89
00:03:36,683 --> 00:03:38,935
They've been planning on it for such
a long time.
90
00:03:38,935 --> 00:03:40,353
Oh, all right.
91
00:03:41,771 --> 00:03:42,772
Hey!
92
00:03:43,273 --> 00:03:43,773
Yeah?
93
00:03:44,274 --> 00:03:46,276
You never mentioned this before.
94
00:03:46,276 --> 00:03:47,527
When did you ask them?
95
00:03:47,527 --> 00:03:49,662
Go take your shower, dear.
96
00:03:49,662 --> 00:03:51,531
Lucy.
97
00:03:51,531 --> 00:03:53,866
When did you ask them?
98
00:03:53,866 --> 00:03:56,502
This afternoon.
99
00:03:57,670 --> 00:03:59,539
Well, Sam's going away tomorrow
100
00:03:59,539 --> 00:04:01,541
and it's her last chance to cat...
101
00:04:04,294 --> 00:04:06,095
Her last chance to what?
102
00:04:06,095 --> 00:04:09,048
It's her last chance to have dinner
here with him.
103
00:04:09,048 --> 00:04:12,552
Why the sudden interest in Dorothy
and Sam?
104
00:04:12,552 --> 00:04:15,355
Have you been messing around with
their romance?
105
00:04:15,355 --> 00:04:16,723
Of course not.
106
00:04:16,723 --> 00:04:17,724
I just think they're two nice people
107
00:04:18,224 --> 00:04:19,225
to have dinner with, that's all.
108
00:04:19,726 --> 00:04:21,227
I don't care if they never get
married.
109
00:04:21,728 --> 00:04:23,479
What is it to me?
110
00:04:23,479 --> 00:04:27,283
All right, we'll have dinner.
but let's break it up early.
111
00:04:27,283 --> 00:04:28,785
I got a recording session in the
morning.
112
00:04:29,285 --> 00:04:30,536
I got to be in bed by 10:00.
113
00:04:30,536 --> 00:04:32,905
10:00?
114
00:04:32,905 --> 00:04:35,375
Yeah, I'm sorry, honey, but if I
don't get some rest tonight,
115
00:04:35,375 --> 00:04:36,709
I won't have any voice left at all.
116
00:04:36,709 --> 00:04:38,161
They'll understand.
117
00:04:38,661 --> 00:04:41,214
But, honey, this is your one night
off.
118
00:04:41,214 --> 00:04:42,715
I think it'd do you a lot more good
119
00:04:42,715 --> 00:04:45,218
to just sit around and relax and have
a few laughs.
120
00:04:45,218 --> 00:04:47,086
(guffawing)
121
00:04:48,921 --> 00:04:50,673
A few chuckles?
122
00:04:50,673 --> 00:04:52,091
(chuckling)
123
00:04:53,593 --> 00:04:55,895
A little snicker?
124
00:05:09,609 --> 00:05:10,610
(doorbell buzzing)
125
00:05:10,610 --> 00:05:12,111
LUCY: Oh, will you get that, dear?
126
00:05:12,111 --> 00:05:13,613
I'm not quite ready yet.
127
00:05:14,113 --> 00:05:15,615
It figures.
128
00:05:22,005 --> 00:05:23,006
Oh, hello, Dorothy!
129
00:05:23,006 --> 00:05:24,007
Hi, Ricky.
130
00:05:24,007 --> 00:05:25,008
Hello, Sam.
How are you?
131
00:05:25,508 --> 00:05:26,509
Rick, nice to see you How have you
been?
132
00:05:26,509 --> 00:05:27,510
Fine, thank you.
Wonderful.
133
00:05:27,510 --> 00:05:28,511
Here, give me your hat and coat.
134
00:05:28,511 --> 00:05:29,379
Thank you very much.
135
00:05:29,379 --> 00:05:30,880
How you been, huh?
136
00:05:30,880 --> 00:05:32,382
Oh, fine.
Good. Sit down.
137
00:05:32,382 --> 00:05:33,883
Make yourselves at home.
Thanks a lot.
138
00:05:34,884 --> 00:05:36,386
Um, where's Lucy?
139
00:05:36,886 --> 00:05:38,388
RICKY: Oh, she's not ready yet.
140
00:05:38,388 --> 00:05:39,389
Oh.
141
00:05:39,389 --> 00:05:41,858
You know how long it takes them, Sam.
142
00:05:42,358 --> 00:05:44,227
Oh, that's right, you're not married,
are you?
143
00:05:44,227 --> 00:05:45,228
No.
144
00:05:45,228 --> 00:05:46,729
Not yet.
145
00:05:46,729 --> 00:05:49,115
Well, you're cleverer than I thought.
146
00:05:50,867 --> 00:05:53,152
How you managed to keep single all
these years...
147
00:05:53,152 --> 00:05:55,955
Oh, oh, uh, Ricky, the apartment
looks lovely.
148
00:05:55,955 --> 00:05:56,789
Oh, thank you.
149
00:05:56,789 --> 00:06:01,244
Sam, uh, they have a lovely baby.
150
00:06:01,244 --> 00:06:03,579
Oh, Ricky, could we see him?
151
00:06:03,579 --> 00:06:05,498
Well, I wish you could, but he's
already sleeping.
152
00:06:05,498 --> 00:06:08,000
Lucy doesn't like anybody to go in
while he's asleep, you know.
153
00:06:08,501 --> 00:06:10,303
She really puts her foot down on
that.
154
00:06:10,303 --> 00:06:12,672
Well, hello, honey! Hi,
Lucy.
155
00:06:12,672 --> 00:06:14,674
Sam, so nice to see you again.
156
00:06:14,674 --> 00:06:15,675
Thank you, Lucy.
157
00:06:15,675 --> 00:06:16,175
Please sit down.
158
00:06:16,175 --> 00:06:17,176
Thank you very much.
159
00:06:17,176 --> 00:06:20,012
My, aren't they a handsome couple?
160
00:06:20,012 --> 00:06:22,932
Oh, Sam's the handsome one.
161
00:06:22,932 --> 00:06:24,684
Stop it, Dorothy. Stop.
162
00:06:24,684 --> 00:06:27,070
We were just talking about the baby.
163
00:06:27,070 --> 00:06:29,072
Oh, talking about babies.
164
00:06:29,072 --> 00:06:31,074
Think of the beautiful children
165
00:06:31,074 --> 00:06:31,908
these two could have.
166
00:06:33,693 --> 00:06:37,163
Imagine, a little girl with Dorothy's
lovely hair
167
00:06:37,663 --> 00:06:39,449
and Sam's wide-set eyes.
168
00:06:39,449 --> 00:06:41,250
RICKY: Yeah.
169
00:06:41,250 --> 00:06:43,369
(laughing)
170
00:06:43,369 --> 00:06:45,371
What are you laughing at?
171
00:06:45,371 --> 00:06:47,373
I was just thinking, it'd be funny
172
00:06:47,373 --> 00:06:49,876
if she turns out to have Dorothy's
lovely eyes
173
00:06:49,876 --> 00:06:52,628
and Sam's wide-set hair.
174
00:06:54,680 --> 00:06:57,016
Oh, don't pay any attention to him.
175
00:06:57,016 --> 00:07:00,019
Aw, no. I want her to look exactly
like Sam.
176
00:07:00,019 --> 00:07:01,521
Oh, well, of course she would, dear.
177
00:07:02,021 --> 00:07:04,023
Oh, gee, I wish the baby was awake.
178
00:07:04,023 --> 00:07:05,525
Well, let's go in and look at him
anyway.
179
00:07:05,525 --> 00:07:06,526
What do you mean, let's go in and
look at him...
180
00:07:07,026 --> 00:07:08,027
Honey, please.
181
00:07:08,027 --> 00:07:09,529
Come on.
182
00:07:17,570 --> 00:07:20,156
DOROTHY: Oh, isn't he darling?
183
00:07:20,156 --> 00:07:21,457
Husky, huh?
184
00:07:21,958 --> 00:07:22,742
Yes, he is.
185
00:07:25,161 --> 00:07:26,162
(sniffing)
186
00:07:26,162 --> 00:07:27,163
Lucy.
187
00:07:28,915 --> 00:07:31,584
Lucy, I smell something burning in
the oven.
188
00:07:31,584 --> 00:07:33,469
My chickens!
My chickens!
189
00:07:33,469 --> 00:07:36,055
(baby screaming)
190
00:07:40,426 --> 00:07:41,427
Oh, no!
191
00:07:41,427 --> 00:07:42,929
Oh, no!
192
00:07:42,929 --> 00:07:44,430
Oh... oh, my!
193
00:07:44,430 --> 00:07:46,933
Oh, my whole dinner!
194
00:07:46,933 --> 00:07:48,434
My whole dinner!
195
00:07:49,435 --> 00:07:51,771
My whole dinner!
196
00:07:53,272 --> 00:07:54,774
Oh, no!
197
00:07:54,774 --> 00:07:57,777
And then there I was in the middle of
the stage,
198
00:07:57,777 --> 00:07:59,078
and I started singing.
199
00:07:59,078 --> 00:08:02,498
Well, I was 12 years old when I sang
the first song
200
00:08:02,498 --> 00:08:04,500
and I've been in show business ever
since.
201
00:08:04,500 --> 00:08:06,502
Oh, show business must be so
exciting.
202
00:08:06,502 --> 00:08:09,505
Yeah, it's a lot of work, but I love
it.
203
00:08:10,506 --> 00:08:13,009
Well, the baby is finally asleep.
204
00:08:13,009 --> 00:08:15,511
I'm so sorry dinner was ruined.
205
00:08:15,511 --> 00:08:18,297
Oh, you fixed something for them,
dear.
206
00:08:18,297 --> 00:08:19,682
No, Dorothy did.
207
00:08:19,682 --> 00:08:20,683
She's a real good cook.
208
00:08:20,683 --> 00:08:21,684
Well.
209
00:08:22,185 --> 00:08:23,686
Best meal I had in months.
210
00:08:25,188 --> 00:08:26,472
Thank you.
211
00:08:26,472 --> 00:08:28,357
I have a warm plate for you in the
kitchen.
212
00:08:28,858 --> 00:08:31,227
Oh, no, thanks, Dorothy.
I'm not a bit hungry.
213
00:08:31,227 --> 00:08:33,729
Well, as long as you're here now,
I'll excuse myself.
214
00:08:34,230 --> 00:08:35,531
I can't keep my eyes open.
215
00:08:35,531 --> 00:08:37,450
Oh, well, I'll, I'll fix you some
coffee, dear.
216
00:08:37,450 --> 00:08:39,452
That'll keep those big, brown eyes
open.
217
00:08:39,452 --> 00:08:40,953
No, eh, eh, no, honey.
218
00:08:41,454 --> 00:08:42,455
Uh, I hope you understand.
219
00:08:42,955 --> 00:08:44,457
I have a recording session in the
morning
220
00:08:44,824 --> 00:08:45,791
and I'm just dead tired.
221
00:08:45,791 --> 00:08:46,792
Uh, but, honey,
222
00:08:47,293 --> 00:08:48,294
can't you stay just a little while
longer?
223
00:08:48,294 --> 00:08:49,795
We-we have company.
224
00:08:49,795 --> 00:08:51,797
Well, I know, dear, and I'm awfully
sorry, but...
225
00:08:51,797 --> 00:08:54,300
All right, we understand, uh, don't
we, dear?
226
00:08:54,300 --> 00:08:55,801
Oh, of course.
227
00:08:55,801 --> 00:08:57,303
A man should be able to do
228
00:08:57,303 --> 00:08:59,805
anything he wants to in his own home.
229
00:09:00,306 --> 00:09:01,307
Right.
230
00:09:01,307 --> 00:09:02,808
Good night.
231
00:09:02,808 --> 00:09:03,809
Good night.
232
00:09:03,809 --> 00:09:05,094
Ricky!
233
00:09:06,896 --> 00:09:10,399
Lucy, don't shake your head at me
like that.
234
00:09:10,399 --> 00:09:14,186
I told you when I got home that I had
to be in bed by 10:00.
235
00:09:14,186 --> 00:09:17,440
I know you did, but I didn't think
you meant it, dear.
236
00:09:17,440 --> 00:09:20,860
Well, it's all your fault, dear.
237
00:09:22,828 --> 00:09:25,081
My fault, darling?
238
00:09:25,081 --> 00:09:26,365
Yes, darling.
239
00:09:26,866 --> 00:09:30,369
If you would have consulted with me
before you made your plans,
240
00:09:30,369 --> 00:09:31,621
I would have told you.
241
00:09:31,621 --> 00:09:32,922
Oh, I'm so sorry,
242
00:09:32,922 --> 00:09:36,926
I forgot to ask your permission, Your
Majesty.
243
00:09:37,426 --> 00:09:38,210
Sam, we'd better go.
244
00:09:38,210 --> 00:09:39,128
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
245
00:09:39,128 --> 00:09:41,547
No, don't go.
246
00:09:41,547 --> 00:09:43,299
Ricky is not going to bed.
247
00:09:43,299 --> 00:09:45,801
Ricky is going to bed.
248
00:09:45,801 --> 00:09:47,803
Ricky is not going to bed.
249
00:09:48,304 --> 00:09:51,557
He's going to stay here and act
happily married if it kills him.
250
00:09:52,892 --> 00:09:54,894
Oh, Lucy, what's the use?
251
00:09:54,894 --> 00:09:56,395
It's all ruined anyway.
252
00:09:56,896 --> 00:09:58,397
What's ruined?
253
00:09:58,397 --> 00:10:00,616
You were right, dear, go to bed.
254
00:10:01,117 --> 00:10:01,984
Lucy?
255
00:10:01,984 --> 00:10:03,319
Yes, sir.
256
00:10:03,319 --> 00:10:06,322
I thought I told you to mess out.
257
00:10:06,322 --> 00:10:08,741
Well, I don't care.
258
00:10:08,741 --> 00:10:10,242
I only wanted Sam and Dorothy
259
00:10:10,242 --> 00:10:12,628
to be as happily married as I thought
we were.
260
00:10:12,628 --> 00:10:15,381
Well, tonight has been a glorious
example.
261
00:10:15,381 --> 00:10:16,799
Well, tonight doesn't count.
262
00:10:16,799 --> 00:10:18,301
This isn't like any other night.
263
00:10:18,301 --> 00:10:19,802
You know, the baby cried and the food
burned.
264
00:10:20,303 --> 00:10:21,587
Yes, that's true.
265
00:10:21,587 --> 00:10:23,472
Yeah, that's true, but why did you
say
266
00:10:23,973 --> 00:10:25,474
that tonight is not like any other
night?
267
00:10:25,474 --> 00:10:27,677
Now, you cut that out, Ricky Ricardo!
268
00:10:27,677 --> 00:10:30,429
You're happily married, and you know
it!
269
00:10:32,315 --> 00:10:35,818
Well, all right.
270
00:10:35,818 --> 00:10:37,570
Sit down, Sam.
271
00:10:37,570 --> 00:10:39,438
Dorothy.
272
00:10:41,440 --> 00:10:43,693
What are you going to do now?
273
00:10:43,693 --> 00:10:44,994
I'm just going to tell Sam
274
00:10:44,994 --> 00:10:47,279
exactly the way I feel about
marriage.
275
00:10:47,279 --> 00:10:49,699
Don't you dare!
276
00:10:51,083 --> 00:10:53,369
Sit down, Lucy.
277
00:10:57,340 --> 00:11:02,845
Sam, my boy, I've been married over
12 years
278
00:11:02,845 --> 00:11:05,848
and if I had it to do over...
279
00:11:08,851 --> 00:11:10,853
I'd get married again.
280
00:11:11,354 --> 00:11:12,855
You would?
281
00:11:12,855 --> 00:11:15,858
Yep, I would gladly get married
again.
282
00:11:15,858 --> 00:11:17,109
But why?
283
00:11:17,109 --> 00:11:20,446
Now, that's a very good question,
284
00:11:20,946 --> 00:11:23,449
and it's a hard one to answer.
285
00:11:23,449 --> 00:11:26,702
Maybe it's because wives are
economical.
286
00:11:26,702 --> 00:11:28,287
Well.
287
00:11:28,287 --> 00:11:31,907
Look, Lucy saves me a lot of money on
food.
288
00:11:31,907 --> 00:11:33,492
That's right, I do.
289
00:11:33,492 --> 00:11:35,327
You know, serving leftovers.
290
00:11:35,327 --> 00:11:36,328
Leftovers?
291
00:11:36,328 --> 00:11:38,330
Yes, she's great at serving
leftovers.
292
00:11:38,831 --> 00:11:41,333
But the strange thing is, I never had
any of the meals
293
00:11:41,834 --> 00:11:44,136
that the leftovers were left over
from.
294
00:11:44,136 --> 00:11:45,888
Ricky!
295
00:11:45,888 --> 00:11:48,891
And yet, I would get married all over
again.
296
00:11:48,891 --> 00:11:50,393
I don't know why.
297
00:11:50,393 --> 00:11:52,344
Maybe it's the mystery of it all.
298
00:11:52,344 --> 00:11:53,846
The mystery?
299
00:11:53,846 --> 00:11:55,314
Yeah.
300
00:11:55,314 --> 00:11:57,316
You know, Sam, you would think
301
00:11:57,316 --> 00:11:58,818
that you would know what your wife
looks like
302
00:11:59,318 --> 00:12:00,319
when you married her, right?
303
00:12:00,319 --> 00:12:01,821
Well, of course, you would.
304
00:12:01,821 --> 00:12:05,324
You got a big surprise coming to you,
my boy.
305
00:12:06,525 --> 00:12:08,411
They have a whole other face
306
00:12:08,411 --> 00:12:10,413
underneath the face you married.
307
00:12:13,532 --> 00:12:15,034
And it must be awful
308
00:12:15,034 --> 00:12:16,919
because they never let you see it.
309
00:12:18,287 --> 00:12:19,789
You know, when they go to bed at
night?
310
00:12:19,789 --> 00:12:20,790
Yeah.
311
00:12:20,790 --> 00:12:24,293
They cover it all up with cold cream,
312
00:12:24,293 --> 00:12:29,048
and then they get their chins
strapped in a hammock.
313
00:12:29,048 --> 00:12:31,050
They wear blinkers over their eyes.
314
00:12:31,550 --> 00:12:33,052
And in the mornings...
315
00:12:33,052 --> 00:12:34,553
ay-ay-ay, in the mornings...
316
00:12:36,188 --> 00:12:38,557
They come staggering out of bed
317
00:12:38,557 --> 00:12:42,561
with wire cages in their hair, grease
in their face,
318
00:12:42,561 --> 00:12:44,897
and then they proceed to the kitchen
319
00:12:45,397 --> 00:12:48,901
where they squeeze you a glassful of
seeds
320
00:12:48,901 --> 00:12:51,403
with a little bit of orange juice in
it.
321
00:12:52,705 --> 00:12:55,124
They throw some raw bacon and eggs at
you
322
00:12:55,124 --> 00:12:56,625
with some burned toast
323
00:12:56,625 --> 00:12:58,627
and they give you a cup of coffee
324
00:12:58,627 --> 00:13:00,463
that tastes just like mud.
325
00:13:00,463 --> 00:13:05,050
Well, I'm very happy to find out how
you really feel.
326
00:13:06,836 --> 00:13:08,137
Hi!
Hi.
327
00:13:08,137 --> 00:13:09,889
Oh, no.
328
00:13:12,308 --> 00:13:14,310
Lover and I thought we'd come up
329
00:13:14,310 --> 00:13:15,811
and find out how you were doing.
330
00:13:15,811 --> 00:13:17,313
We can't stay very long
331
00:13:17,313 --> 00:13:20,316
'cause you know how honeybunch and I
love to be alone.
332
00:13:23,068 --> 00:13:27,406
Married 25 years and still mad about
each other.
333
00:13:27,406 --> 00:13:30,025
Oh, shut up.
334
00:13:30,025 --> 00:13:31,944
It's too late, Ethel.
335
00:13:31,944 --> 00:13:33,445
Lucy!
336
00:13:33,445 --> 00:13:35,948
Don't you talk to me, you... you
husband.
337
00:13:35,948 --> 00:13:38,951
Honey, I said I would marry you all
over again!
338
00:13:38,951 --> 00:13:41,370
Well, I wouldn't marry you again!
339
00:13:41,370 --> 00:13:42,671
You had it coming to you.
340
00:13:42,671 --> 00:13:44,673
RICKY: I told you not to butt in
other people's business!
341
00:13:44,673 --> 00:13:45,508
(door slams)
342
00:13:46,842 --> 00:13:49,845
(chuckling nervously)
343
00:13:49,845 --> 00:13:51,797
Oh, dear.
344
00:13:52,298 --> 00:13:53,299
Let's go.
345
00:13:58,804 --> 00:13:59,805
Come on.
346
00:14:04,310 --> 00:14:05,311
(shouting): Come on!
347
00:14:05,811 --> 00:14:06,812
(shouting): All right!
348
00:14:11,534 --> 00:14:12,535
(door slams)
349
00:14:13,536 --> 00:14:15,037
I wonder what went wrong.
350
00:14:15,037 --> 00:14:17,039
I don't know, but stop leaning on me.
351
00:14:17,039 --> 00:14:18,541
You weigh a ton!
352
00:14:35,524 --> 00:14:37,409
Lucy, how about my breakfast?
353
00:15:02,885 --> 00:15:04,887
There's your orange juice.
354
00:15:13,028 --> 00:15:15,781
Oh, I left a few seeds in it as
usual.
355
00:15:43,309 --> 00:15:48,647
(rhythmic scraping)
356
00:15:52,484 --> 00:15:53,986
I burn an awful lot of toast,
357
00:15:54,486 --> 00:15:56,488
but I'm developing quite a beat.
358
00:16:16,709 --> 00:16:19,211
Here you are, my famous cup of mud.
359
00:16:21,847 --> 00:16:23,515
Well, how do you like it?
360
00:16:23,515 --> 00:16:25,300
Like what?
361
00:16:25,300 --> 00:16:29,104
This is the distorted picture you
gave Sam last night.
362
00:16:29,104 --> 00:16:31,106
Now, if you'd like to apologize
363
00:16:31,106 --> 00:16:33,609
for all the nasty things you said,
I'd be very happy
364
00:16:33,609 --> 00:16:37,112
to go ahead and fix your breakfast as
I usually do.
365
00:16:37,112 --> 00:16:38,897
You just did.
366
00:16:38,897 --> 00:16:41,316
Oh!
367
00:16:41,316 --> 00:16:44,319
And I suppose I look like I usually
do, too, huh?
368
00:16:44,319 --> 00:16:47,072
No, no, I wouldn't say that.
369
00:16:47,072 --> 00:16:49,958
I think you look a little better.
370
00:16:49,958 --> 00:16:53,328
Ricky Ricardo, you apologize!
371
00:16:53,328 --> 00:16:55,297
Why should I apologize?
372
00:16:55,297 --> 00:16:57,800
The only reason that I told Sam
373
00:16:57,800 --> 00:16:59,301
the things I told him last night
374
00:16:59,301 --> 00:17:01,303
is because you and Dorothy were
trying to hook him,
375
00:17:01,303 --> 00:17:04,056
and I told you to stay out of his
affairs.
376
00:17:04,056 --> 00:17:07,393
Well, for once, I decided not to do
what you told me.
377
00:17:07,393 --> 00:17:08,844
For once?
378
00:17:08,844 --> 00:17:10,596
You never do what I told you.
379
00:17:10,596 --> 00:17:12,931
Then why don't you quit "tolding" me?
380
00:17:12,931 --> 00:17:14,933
Ay, que barbaridad!
381
00:17:14,933 --> 00:17:16,435
Porque tienes la cabeza mas dura de
ninguna mujer
382
00:17:16,935 --> 00:17:18,821
que yo he conocido en toda la vida
entera!
383
00:17:18,821 --> 00:17:21,824
Sticks and stones may break my bones,
384
00:17:22,324 --> 00:17:24,660
but Spanish names won't hurt me.
385
00:17:24,660 --> 00:17:28,447
Sometimes I wish I never left Cuba.
386
00:17:28,447 --> 00:17:29,915
That makes two of us.
387
00:17:29,915 --> 00:17:31,333
You take that back.
388
00:17:31,333 --> 00:17:32,251
I won't take it back.
389
00:17:32,751 --> 00:17:34,002
You take back what you said last
night.
390
00:17:34,002 --> 00:17:35,287
I will not!
391
00:17:35,287 --> 00:17:37,172
Now, are you going to fix my
breakfast or not?
392
00:17:37,172 --> 00:17:39,124
I already did, remember?
393
00:17:39,124 --> 00:17:42,127
All right, then I'll eat breakfast
downtown.
394
00:17:42,127 --> 00:17:43,128
Good!
395
00:17:43,128 --> 00:17:44,129
Hmm!
396
00:17:44,630 --> 00:17:46,632
And you can have your lunch down
there, too.
397
00:17:46,632 --> 00:17:47,633
All right!
398
00:17:48,133 --> 00:17:49,134
And your dinner!
399
00:17:49,134 --> 00:17:50,135
Okay!
400
00:17:50,135 --> 00:17:51,637
You can stay down there, too!
401
00:17:52,137 --> 00:17:54,389
Okay, I will! Ha!
402
00:17:55,891 --> 00:17:57,392
Good-bye!
403
00:18:03,732 --> 00:18:05,901
Well, I will as soon as I change.
404
00:18:10,906 --> 00:18:11,907
(doorbell buzzes)
405
00:18:15,410 --> 00:18:18,413
(doorbell buzzing insistently)
406
00:18:18,413 --> 00:18:19,414
(yawning)
407
00:18:25,420 --> 00:18:26,421
Lucy!
408
00:18:26,421 --> 00:18:29,258
He isn't home yet, Ethel, and it's
5:00.
409
00:18:29,758 --> 00:18:32,845
He wasn't home at 3:00 and he wasn't
home at 4:00 either.
410
00:18:32,845 --> 00:18:34,346
Are you gonna come over every hour
411
00:18:34,847 --> 00:18:36,648
just to announce that he isn't home
yet?
412
00:18:36,648 --> 00:18:38,984
Well, he isn't.
413
00:18:38,984 --> 00:18:40,486
Leave the door open, will you?
414
00:18:40,486 --> 00:18:41,987
I want to hear the baby.
415
00:18:41,987 --> 00:18:43,989
Listen, Lucy, didn't you tell me
416
00:18:43,989 --> 00:18:45,491
that when you had your fight,
417
00:18:45,991 --> 00:18:47,993
you told him to go away and stay
away?
418
00:18:47,993 --> 00:18:51,246
Yes, I did, but I didn't think he'd
do it.
419
00:18:51,246 --> 00:18:53,198
Oh, well, now, that makes sense.
420
00:18:53,198 --> 00:18:57,119
Gee, Ethel, well, what if he isn't
ever coming home?
421
00:18:57,119 --> 00:19:00,622
Well, what... what if something's
happened to him?
422
00:19:00,622 --> 00:19:03,125
Oh, now, Lucy, you've got to stop
worrying.
423
00:19:03,125 --> 00:19:04,960
You're getting yourself all upset.
424
00:19:04,960 --> 00:19:05,928
I can't help it.
425
00:19:05,928 --> 00:19:07,429
Put yourself in my place.
426
00:19:07,429 --> 00:19:09,932
If Fred was gone and was never coming
home,
427
00:19:09,932 --> 00:19:11,183
what would you be doing?
428
00:19:11,183 --> 00:19:12,801
Celebrating.
429
00:19:14,770 --> 00:19:16,271
You would not.
430
00:19:16,271 --> 00:19:20,275
It isn't until they're gone that you
really appreciate them.
431
00:19:20,275 --> 00:19:23,529
Oh, Ethel, I love him so.
432
00:19:23,529 --> 00:19:24,696
Lucy, don't cry.
433
00:19:24,696 --> 00:19:26,198
Hey, hey...
434
00:19:28,700 --> 00:19:29,701
What in Sam Hill's
435
00:19:30,202 --> 00:19:31,203
all the commotion about?
436
00:19:31,703 --> 00:19:33,205
Oh, Ricky still isn't home
437
00:19:33,205 --> 00:19:34,206
and Lucy's all upset.
438
00:19:34,706 --> 00:19:37,209
He isn't ever coming home, and it's
my fault.
439
00:19:37,209 --> 00:19:39,211
Oh, now, honey, he's coming home.
440
00:19:39,211 --> 00:19:40,996
I'm, I'm sure he's all right.
441
00:19:40,996 --> 00:19:42,331
Sure, you'll probably find him
442
00:19:42,331 --> 00:19:44,333
down at the police station, wearing a
cop's hat
443
00:19:44,333 --> 00:19:47,219
and eating an ice-cream cone.
444
00:19:47,219 --> 00:19:49,721
Oh, dear, if I, if I knew where he
was,
445
00:19:49,721 --> 00:19:52,224
I'd call him up, and I'd beg him to
come home.
446
00:19:52,224 --> 00:19:54,059
Did you call the club?
447
00:19:54,059 --> 00:19:55,811
Yes. He left two hours ago.
448
00:19:55,811 --> 00:19:57,262
Oh, suppose we wait a couple of weeks
449
00:19:57,763 --> 00:19:59,765
and notify Ellery Queen.
450
00:19:59,765 --> 00:20:01,767
Now, Fred, this is serious.
451
00:20:01,767 --> 00:20:04,269
I just don't happen to think that it
is serious.
452
00:20:04,269 --> 00:20:06,271
Now, listen, Lucy, I know Ricky
pretty well
453
00:20:06,772 --> 00:20:07,773
and I just don't believe
454
00:20:07,773 --> 00:20:09,074
he's really gonna leave you.
455
00:20:09,074 --> 00:20:11,443
Then where is he?
456
00:20:11,443 --> 00:20:12,945
He's doing what any other husbands
457
00:20:13,445 --> 00:20:14,947
are doing under the same
circumstances.
458
00:20:14,947 --> 00:20:16,448
He's just staying away long enough
459
00:20:16,448 --> 00:20:17,749
to give you a good scare.
460
00:20:17,749 --> 00:20:20,669
Do you really think so?
461
00:20:20,669 --> 00:20:22,170
Sure, he's getting you good and
worried
462
00:20:22,671 --> 00:20:23,672
so you'll be so glad to see him,
463
00:20:23,672 --> 00:20:24,957
you'll forget you're mad at him.
464
00:20:24,957 --> 00:20:26,842
Well, if that's what he's doing,
465
00:20:26,842 --> 00:20:29,628
then I just won't be there when he
gets home!
466
00:20:29,628 --> 00:20:30,796
What?!
467
00:20:30,796 --> 00:20:32,214
Two can play at this game.
468
00:20:32,714 --> 00:20:34,099
I'll just give him a good scare.
469
00:20:34,099 --> 00:20:35,934
Well, why don't you go home and give
it to him.
470
00:20:35,934 --> 00:20:38,604
No, I'm not going home; I'm going to
stay right here.
471
00:20:38,604 --> 00:20:39,888
What about the baby?
472
00:20:39,888 --> 00:20:41,390
You go over and keep an eye on him,
will you, Ethel?
473
00:20:41,390 --> 00:20:42,391
No.
Please?
474
00:20:42,391 --> 00:20:43,392
No.
475
00:20:43,392 --> 00:20:44,893
But, Ethel, I can't just be over
there,
476
00:20:44,893 --> 00:20:46,395
standing there, waiting for him when
he comes in.
477
00:20:46,395 --> 00:20:48,397
Please.
Absolutely not!
478
00:20:48,397 --> 00:20:49,898
Now, wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
479
00:20:49,898 --> 00:20:51,400
I'll go and stay with little Ricky.
480
00:20:51,400 --> 00:20:52,901
It's about the only way
481
00:20:52,901 --> 00:20:53,902
I'll ever get a night's sleep.
482
00:20:53,902 --> 00:20:54,903
Okay, thanks, Fred.
483
00:20:54,903 --> 00:20:56,405
Okay.
484
00:20:58,457 --> 00:20:58,957
(door shuts)
485
00:20:59,958 --> 00:21:01,960
Ethel...
486
00:21:03,295 --> 00:21:05,664
Ethel, what if Fred isn't right?
487
00:21:05,664 --> 00:21:09,167
What if Ricky really isn't ever gonna
come home?
488
00:21:09,167 --> 00:21:10,836
What if...?
489
00:21:10,836 --> 00:21:14,089
What if you keep quiet and let me get
some sleep?
490
00:21:14,089 --> 00:21:15,390
All right.
491
00:21:57,215 --> 00:21:58,216
Ethel! Ethel!
492
00:22:01,219 --> 00:22:02,220
(yawning)
493
00:22:02,220 --> 00:22:03,221
Ethel, he's home.
494
00:22:03,221 --> 00:22:04,723
I just saw him come down the hall,
495
00:22:04,723 --> 00:22:06,725
and he brought me candy and flowers.
496
00:22:06,725 --> 00:22:07,109
Good.
497
00:22:27,662 --> 00:22:28,663
Lucy?
498
00:22:29,664 --> 00:22:31,166
Lucy, I'm home.
499
00:22:35,670 --> 00:22:37,172
Sweetheart...
500
00:22:38,673 --> 00:22:40,559
I guess I owe you an apology.
501
00:22:40,559 --> 00:22:43,011
I shouldn't have said all of those
502
00:22:43,011 --> 00:22:44,513
awful things that I said.
503
00:22:44,513 --> 00:22:46,014
I was in a bad humor
504
00:22:46,014 --> 00:22:49,351
and I just blew my top, that's all.
505
00:22:49,351 --> 00:22:53,822
But darling, you know I love being
married to you, honey.
506
00:22:55,690 --> 00:22:59,161
You are the dearest, sweetest,
507
00:22:59,661 --> 00:23:01,663
most wonderful person in the whole
world.
508
00:23:01,663 --> 00:23:04,082
You know, I wasn't gonna come home
tonight
509
00:23:04,082 --> 00:23:05,417
just to teach you a lesson,
510
00:23:05,417 --> 00:23:07,335
and then I got to walking around
511
00:23:07,836 --> 00:23:09,838
and I...
I started thinking
512
00:23:09,838 --> 00:23:10,839
of all the wonderful times
513
00:23:11,339 --> 00:23:12,340
that we had together
514
00:23:12,340 --> 00:23:14,760
and how much we meant to each other
and...
515
00:23:14,760 --> 00:23:20,132
Well... I brought you some flowers
and some candy.
516
00:23:22,434 --> 00:23:23,769
Honey, I-I won't blame you
517
00:23:24,269 --> 00:23:26,772
if you never spoke to me again,
but...
518
00:23:26,772 --> 00:23:28,774
sweetheart, please say you forgive
me, darling.
519
00:23:28,774 --> 00:23:30,976
(falsetto): I forgive you, darling.
520
00:23:33,728 --> 00:23:34,646
(howling with laughter)
521
00:23:35,147 --> 00:23:37,649
RICKY: What are you doing here?
522
00:23:37,649 --> 00:23:40,152
Oh, honey, you should have heard
yourself
523
00:23:40,152 --> 00:23:41,653
saying all those things to Fred.
524
00:23:42,154 --> 00:23:43,655
Fred, how did you keep from laughing?
525
00:23:43,655 --> 00:23:44,656
It wasn't easy.
526
00:23:44,656 --> 00:23:47,159
(laughing)
527
00:23:47,159 --> 00:23:48,660
Well, I'm real happy
528
00:23:48,660 --> 00:23:50,162
I gave you all such a good laugh.
529
00:23:50,662 --> 00:23:52,164
Oh, honey, don't be mad.
530
00:23:52,664 --> 00:23:54,166
Who's mad?!
I'm not mad!
531
00:23:54,166 --> 00:23:55,667
Who's going to get mad?
532
00:23:56,168 --> 00:23:57,169
I'm not mad at all!
533
00:23:57,169 --> 00:23:59,171
Oh, honey, we're sorry.
534
00:23:59,171 --> 00:24:00,505
ETHEL: We're all sorry, Ricky.
535
00:24:00,505 --> 00:24:02,974
Oh, Rick... Ricky, where are you
going?
536
00:24:02,974 --> 00:24:05,477
Out! And this time, I'm not gonna
come back!
537
00:24:05,477 --> 00:24:06,978
But, honey, how about all those
things you said?
538
00:24:06,978 --> 00:24:08,480
You said you loved me
539
00:24:08,480 --> 00:24:10,482
and all the wonderful times we had
and everything.
540
00:24:10,482 --> 00:24:11,483
I take them all back!
541
00:24:11,483 --> 00:24:12,767
Oh, Ricky...
542
00:24:12,767 --> 00:24:13,602
Out of my way, please.
543
00:24:13,602 --> 00:24:15,103
Listen, Ricky, Ricky,
544
00:24:15,103 --> 00:24:16,104
I won't mess in any more romances.
545
00:24:16,104 --> 00:24:17,105
I'll mess out, I promise.
546
00:24:17,105 --> 00:24:18,106
Out of my way, please.
547
00:24:18,106 --> 00:24:18,907
(doorbell buzzes)
Please?
548
00:24:18,907 --> 00:24:20,325
Oh, now what?
549
00:24:20,325 --> 00:24:22,277
We must be making too much noise.
550
00:24:23,829 --> 00:24:24,830
Telegram.
551
00:24:25,330 --> 00:24:25,831
Oh.
552
00:24:28,166 --> 00:24:29,835
Who's it from?
Yeah.
553
00:24:29,835 --> 00:24:32,170
What's it say?
Oh, no.
554
00:24:32,170 --> 00:24:35,173
Oh, honey...
555
00:24:35,173 --> 00:24:37,175
"We figured if you two characters
556
00:24:37,175 --> 00:24:39,678
"could put up with each other for 13
years
557
00:24:39,678 --> 00:24:42,681
"there must be something to this
marriage business,
558
00:24:43,181 --> 00:24:45,183
"so we are giving it a try.
Thanks a lot.
559
00:24:45,183 --> 00:24:46,968
Dorothy and Sam."
560
00:24:48,136 --> 00:24:49,938
Aw, honey.
561
00:24:51,273 --> 00:24:53,275
(laughing)
562
00:24:53,275 --> 00:24:55,026
Oh, baby!
563
00:24:55,026 --> 00:24:56,561
Ha, ha, Rick!
564
00:24:56,561 --> 00:24:57,445
Here.
565
00:24:57,445 --> 00:24:58,446
Oh, thank you!
566
00:24:58,446 --> 00:24:59,447
Here.
567
00:24:59,447 --> 00:25:00,448
Oh, thank you!
568
00:25:08,957 --> 00:25:11,927
("I Love Lucy" theme song playing)
569
00:26:06,848 --> 00:26:10,201
ANNOUNCER: I Love Lucy is a Desilu
Production.
570
00:26:10,201 --> 00:26:12,137
Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz
571
00:26:12,137 --> 00:26:14,723
will be back next week at this same
time.
38959
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