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1
00:00:06,876 --> 00:00:08,530
This is a first.
2
00:00:08,573 --> 00:00:10,358
Empty service bay
available.
3
00:00:10,401 --> 00:00:11,924
Yeah, it happens.
4
00:00:11,968 --> 00:00:13,404
You know, usually,
when I bring my car in,
5
00:00:13,448 --> 00:00:14,797
I have to leave it
out on the street.
6
00:00:14,840 --> 00:00:16,407
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
7
00:00:16,451 --> 00:00:17,800
'Cause you're
so busy.
8
00:00:17,843 --> 00:00:19,976
Yup.
9
00:00:20,020 --> 00:00:22,761
Not today, though.
10
00:00:22,805 --> 00:00:24,981
No, not today.
11
00:00:26,461 --> 00:00:27,592
You want to talk
about it?
12
00:00:27,636 --> 00:00:29,594
I do not.
13
00:00:31,596 --> 00:00:32,945
[sighs]
14
00:00:32,989 --> 00:00:35,861
You know
I can't do that.
15
00:00:35,905 --> 00:00:38,647
All right, look, fine.
16
00:00:38,690 --> 00:00:40,823
Business isn't what
it used to be.
17
00:00:40,866 --> 00:00:44,044
And it's not just the
competition from the big chains,
18
00:00:44,087 --> 00:00:45,480
it's all these new cars.
19
00:00:45,523 --> 00:00:48,004
They don't have driveshafts
and differentials,
20
00:00:48,048 --> 00:00:50,920
it's just motherboards
and chips.
21
00:00:50,963 --> 00:00:53,357
It's like riding around
in a big-ass iPad.
22
00:00:55,664 --> 00:00:56,926
Well...
23
00:00:56,969 --> 00:00:58,884
would you like some
constructive criticism?
24
00:00:58,928 --> 00:01:01,539
Oh... Lord.
25
00:01:01,583 --> 00:01:03,498
Look, this place
is a little old-school.
26
00:01:03,541 --> 00:01:05,500
I mean, you don't
even have free Wi-Fi.
27
00:01:05,543 --> 00:01:06,979
Yes, I do.
28
00:01:07,023 --> 00:01:08,981
It's from the Thai place
next door.
29
00:01:10,505 --> 00:01:12,637
The password
is "padthai22."
30
00:01:12,681 --> 00:01:14,813
They tried to change it,
but I figured it out.
31
00:01:14,857 --> 00:01:16,380
[laughs]
32
00:01:16,424 --> 00:01:17,729
Okay.
33
00:01:17,773 --> 00:01:19,470
Have you ever noticed
one of those businesses
34
00:01:19,514 --> 00:01:21,733
that has a sticker
in the window that reads,
35
00:01:21,777 --> 00:01:23,344
"People love us
on Yelp"?
36
00:01:24,562 --> 00:01:26,347
Yeah, but why would I care
about some sticker?
37
00:01:26,390 --> 00:01:28,827
Well, because your customers
care about them.
38
00:01:28,871 --> 00:01:30,481
I use the site
all the time.
39
00:01:30,525 --> 00:01:32,483
In fact, I have
Elite reviewer status,
40
00:01:32,527 --> 00:01:33,484
not to brag.
41
00:01:33,528 --> 00:01:35,095
Don't worry,
you didn't.
42
00:01:35,138 --> 00:01:37,662
Okay, think about this,
43
00:01:37,706 --> 00:01:39,403
would Tina
ever read a book
44
00:01:39,447 --> 00:01:40,752
that didn't have
an Oprah sticker on it?
45
00:01:40,796 --> 00:01:43,059
[chuckling] Hell no.
46
00:01:43,103 --> 00:01:45,714
How would she know
if the book is good?
47
00:01:49,500 --> 00:01:52,590
Ah...
48
00:01:52,634 --> 00:01:54,592
♪ Welcome to the block,
welcome to the neighborhood ♪
49
00:01:54,636 --> 00:01:55,811
♪ Welcome to the hood.
50
00:02:00,642 --> 00:02:03,906
"Since 1989,
Calvin Butler
51
00:02:03,949 --> 00:02:06,343
"has been Pasadena's
52
00:02:06,387 --> 00:02:09,607
"most sought-after
mechanic.
53
00:02:09,651 --> 00:02:13,045
There has even been
talk of a statue."
54
00:02:15,787 --> 00:02:18,703
Whoa, check you out, Pop.What?
55
00:02:18,747 --> 00:02:20,966
You building a Yelp page.
Man, that's pretty ambitious
56
00:02:21,010 --> 00:02:22,838
for a man of your,
uh... [stammers]
57
00:02:22,881 --> 00:02:24,535
...vintage.
58
00:02:25,797 --> 00:02:28,017
Well, I'll have you know
that I'm actually
59
00:02:28,060 --> 00:02:29,714
pretty good
with technology.
60
00:02:29,758 --> 00:02:32,413
See, I got this cool picture
of the shop.
61
00:02:32,456 --> 00:02:35,155
All I have to do is get it off
my phone and onto my computer,
62
00:02:35,198 --> 00:02:37,809
which is easy
because, uh...
63
00:02:44,033 --> 00:02:45,817
Just let me do it.
64
00:02:45,861 --> 00:02:47,384
Oh, I like that idea.
65
00:02:47,428 --> 00:02:49,908
Yeah, there you go.
[chuckles]
Yeah. [mutters]
66
00:02:49,952 --> 00:02:51,954
Hey, man,
67
00:02:51,997 --> 00:02:53,869
I've been thinking,
we should go out
68
00:02:53,912 --> 00:02:55,392
for a night on the town
this week,
69
00:02:55,436 --> 00:02:56,828
like back in the day.
Butler boys.
70
00:02:56,872 --> 00:02:59,788
Oh, yeah, that's
interesting. [laughs]
71
00:02:59,831 --> 00:03:01,572
You know, since the day
you met Necie,
72
00:03:01,616 --> 00:03:04,445
you have asked me to hang out
a total of zero times.
73
00:03:05,881 --> 00:03:07,535
But now that she's out of town,
74
00:03:07,578 --> 00:03:09,406
suddenly,
I'm not invisible anymore.
75
00:03:09,450 --> 00:03:10,581
I know, I know.
76
00:03:10,625 --> 00:03:11,713
I've been
a bad brother.
77
00:03:11,756 --> 00:03:13,193
Yeah.
It's just so weird
78
00:03:13,236 --> 00:03:14,672
with Necie being gone.
79
00:03:14,716 --> 00:03:16,413
I don't know what
to do with myself, man.
80
00:03:16,457 --> 00:03:19,416
For the last six months,
I've been, you know,
81
00:03:19,460 --> 00:03:21,201
busy... every night.
82
00:03:22,854 --> 00:03:24,900
Yes, I know.
I can hear the shrieking.
83
00:03:26,467 --> 00:03:28,208
Thank God Necie
is quiet.
84
00:03:30,253 --> 00:03:31,820
Good Lord, yuck.
85
00:03:31,863 --> 00:03:33,691
[chuckles] I see your yuck,
86
00:03:33,735 --> 00:03:35,954
and raise you a... [shudders]
87
00:03:35,998 --> 00:03:37,739
Okay, it has been a minute
88
00:03:37,782 --> 00:03:39,480
since I hit the clubs.
89
00:03:39,523 --> 00:03:41,960
We should take two
separate cars 'cause, uh,
90
00:03:42,004 --> 00:03:44,093
you know how
your boy does. [laughs]
91
00:03:44,136 --> 00:03:45,877
[forced laugh]
92
00:03:45,921 --> 00:03:48,619
No, we don't.
Let's keep it that way.
93
00:03:50,491 --> 00:03:52,493
Here, Pops,
your picture is uploaded.
94
00:03:52,536 --> 00:03:55,104
Ah, cool. All right.
95
00:03:55,147 --> 00:03:57,628
And...
96
00:03:57,672 --> 00:04:00,631
Calvin's Yelp page
is ready to launch.
97
00:04:00,675 --> 00:04:03,112
All right.
This is exciting.
98
00:04:03,155 --> 00:04:05,201
Okay, ten... nine...
99
00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:06,898
eight...
And post.
[laptop chimes]
100
00:04:06,942 --> 00:04:08,857
Dad,
101
00:04:08,900 --> 00:04:10,467
you got to respect
the countdown, man.
102
00:04:10,511 --> 00:04:12,730
Marty, I ain't got
time to waste.
103
00:04:12,774 --> 00:04:14,602
I'm trying to get me a sticker.
104
00:04:17,996 --> 00:04:19,650
So...
105
00:04:19,694 --> 00:04:22,174
you about ready
to close that thing?
106
00:04:22,218 --> 00:04:24,655
Almost.
107
00:04:26,701 --> 00:04:29,051
You know, writing a
Yelp review is tricky.
[sighs]
108
00:04:29,094 --> 00:04:31,749
There's a fine line between rave
and going over the top.
109
00:04:31,793 --> 00:04:33,490
Oh, there's also
a fine line between
110
00:04:33,534 --> 00:04:35,710
sex and me
going to sleep.
111
00:04:35,753 --> 00:04:38,495
Stay with me, baby.
I'm almost done.
112
00:04:38,539 --> 00:04:40,497
[groans] Just give him
five stars
113
00:04:40,541 --> 00:04:42,543
and take
your pants off.
114
00:04:42,586 --> 00:04:45,023
Look, you know,
it's not that simple.
115
00:04:45,067 --> 00:04:47,983
I take the integrity of my
Yelp reviews very seriously.
116
00:04:48,026 --> 00:04:50,072
There are legions
of Yelpers out there
117
00:04:50,115 --> 00:04:53,641
who have come to trust
the reviews of "Dave J."
118
00:04:54,859 --> 00:04:56,861
That is 100%
in your head.
119
00:04:56,905 --> 00:04:58,298
Is it?
120
00:04:58,341 --> 00:05:00,952
I gave one star to a bike shop
that bent my frame.
121
00:05:00,996 --> 00:05:03,912
36 people found
that review "helpful."
122
00:05:05,174 --> 00:05:08,525
That bike shop
is now a dentist office.
123
00:05:08,569 --> 00:05:12,050
Mmm. That kind of power
is a turn-on.
124
00:05:12,094 --> 00:05:13,225
Is it?
125
00:05:13,269 --> 00:05:15,184
No, but it's 11:15, so
126
00:05:15,227 --> 00:05:17,273
yes.O-Okay.
127
00:05:19,319 --> 00:05:22,322
CHILDREN [singing off-key]:
♪ This little light of
128
00:05:22,365 --> 00:05:25,586
♪ Mine
129
00:05:25,629 --> 00:05:27,544
♪ I'm gonna let it... Ugh.
130
00:05:27,588 --> 00:05:29,851
Hey, Tina. Thanks
for picking me up.
131
00:05:29,894 --> 00:05:33,768
What in the Fergie's national
anthem is going on in there?
132
00:05:33,811 --> 00:05:36,161
It's the after-school
music program.
133
00:05:36,205 --> 00:05:37,772
We lost our music teacher
last year,
134
00:05:37,815 --> 00:05:39,556
so the biology teacher
is filling in.
135
00:05:39,600 --> 00:05:42,646
Well, what, is he dissecting
a live goat in there?
136
00:05:44,039 --> 00:05:45,562
It's not that bad.
137
00:05:45,606 --> 00:05:48,739
[children wailing-singing]
138
00:05:48,783 --> 00:05:50,915
Okay, it's terrible.
Mm.
139
00:05:50,959 --> 00:05:52,264
I'm looking to hire
someone new,
140
00:05:52,308 --> 00:05:54,005
but it's a really hard
position to fill.
141
00:05:54,049 --> 00:05:56,356
I need someone
who can sing and dance
142
00:05:56,399 --> 00:05:57,792
and has the charisma
143
00:05:57,835 --> 00:06:00,098
to inspire the kids.
144
00:06:00,142 --> 00:06:01,622
And pretty.
145
00:06:04,102 --> 00:06:06,757
Gemma, how gullible
do you think I am?
146
00:06:06,801 --> 00:06:09,325
What? Why would you--
Wh-Wh-What?
147
00:06:10,370 --> 00:06:13,634
[imitating Gemma]: "Hey, T.
Thanks for picking me up.
148
00:06:13,677 --> 00:06:16,724
Meet me in front
of multipurpose room three."
149
00:06:16,767 --> 00:06:19,944
You knew damn well I was gonna
walk in and hear all that mess.
150
00:06:19,988 --> 00:06:23,165
Whoa. You think--
Wh-- Uh, what?
151
00:06:25,776 --> 00:06:26,864
Will you do it?
152
00:06:26,908 --> 00:06:28,213
[smacks lips]
153
00:06:28,257 --> 00:06:30,651
Gemma, you know I've got
my cupcake business and...
154
00:06:30,694 --> 00:06:32,870
But it's only a couple
of afternoons a week.
155
00:06:32,914 --> 00:06:34,916
[sighs]
But you know what?
156
00:06:34,959 --> 00:06:36,221
I shouldn't have
put you on the spot.
157
00:06:36,265 --> 00:06:38,093
Yeah, you
shouldn't have.
158
00:06:38,136 --> 00:06:40,225
Oh, hi, Miss Tina.
Hey.
159
00:06:40,269 --> 00:06:41,966
I wasn't expecting
to see you here.
160
00:06:44,186 --> 00:06:46,406
Can we
go home, Mom?
161
00:06:46,449 --> 00:06:47,711
I'm sad.
162
00:06:47,755 --> 00:06:49,800
This is making all the kids
fall out of love
163
00:06:49,844 --> 00:06:51,672
with music.
Oh.
164
00:06:55,676 --> 00:06:58,809
The only thing worse than
that singing is y'all's acting.
165
00:06:58,853 --> 00:07:00,724
I'll take that
as a yes.
166
00:07:00,768 --> 00:07:03,205
All right.
[shrieks]
167
00:07:05,033 --> 00:07:07,644
Mm-hmm. Mm...
168
00:07:07,688 --> 00:07:09,733
Mm-hmm...
169
00:07:09,777 --> 00:07:11,996
So...?
It's good, right?
170
00:07:12,040 --> 00:07:13,824
No, it's great. [chuckles]
171
00:07:13,868 --> 00:07:16,174
Real rave. Five stars.
172
00:07:16,218 --> 00:07:18,046
Happy to do it.
173
00:07:18,089 --> 00:07:20,222
[stammers] There's one line
in here that,
174
00:07:20,265 --> 00:07:21,702
uh, you know,
threw me off a little.
175
00:07:21,745 --> 00:07:24,269
"Don't be put off
176
00:07:24,313 --> 00:07:26,446
"by the owner's
prickly exterior,
177
00:07:26,489 --> 00:07:29,666
you'll come to realize
he's a great guy."
178
00:07:29,710 --> 00:07:31,189
Yeah.
179
00:07:31,233 --> 00:07:34,236
Why-why did you call me
"prickly"?
180
00:07:34,279 --> 00:07:36,978
Well, the takeaway is
181
00:07:37,021 --> 00:07:38,893
"great guy."
182
00:07:38,936 --> 00:07:40,460
Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure,
183
00:07:40,503 --> 00:07:43,375
but before that it's "prickly."
184
00:07:44,812 --> 00:07:48,424
Okay, look, Calvin, don't
take this as an insult, but,
185
00:07:48,468 --> 00:07:50,861
you know, I didn't want my
followers to come in and be...
186
00:07:50,905 --> 00:07:54,430
caught off guard by your...
strong personality.
187
00:07:54,474 --> 00:07:57,738
But, again, "great guy."
188
00:07:57,781 --> 00:08:01,263
I appreciate
the review, Dave,
189
00:08:01,306 --> 00:08:04,396
but, come on, I'm not prickly.
190
00:08:08,009 --> 00:08:09,401
Oh, I agree, Pop.
191
00:08:09,445 --> 00:08:10,446
You're not prickly.
192
00:08:10,490 --> 00:08:11,795
Thank you.
193
00:08:11,839 --> 00:08:13,754
Yeah, that's not
the right word.
194
00:08:13,797 --> 00:08:16,278
It's more like...
cantankerous.
[chuckles]
195
00:08:17,453 --> 00:08:19,368
Testy.
196
00:08:19,411 --> 00:08:20,500
Cranky.
197
00:08:20,543 --> 00:08:22,240
Ooh, you know,
I considered cranky.
198
00:08:22,284 --> 00:08:25,069
Ah.
Ooh, you know what?
I got it:
199
00:08:25,113 --> 00:08:26,331
obstreperous.
200
00:08:26,375 --> 00:08:28,943
Oh, yeah.
Obstreperous.
No, no, no, no.
201
00:08:28,986 --> 00:08:30,814
I am not obstreperous.
202
00:08:30,858 --> 00:08:33,295
I'm the opposite.
I am very streperous.
203
00:08:34,949 --> 00:08:36,516
Calvin, you know, you're
only focusing on the negative.
204
00:08:36,559 --> 00:08:37,734
Look at this.
205
00:08:37,778 --> 00:08:41,172
18 thumbs up for Dave J.
I'm killing it.
206
00:08:42,217 --> 00:08:44,436
But the important
thing is-is
207
00:08:44,480 --> 00:08:46,438
I'm bringing eyeballs
to your site.
208
00:08:46,482 --> 00:08:49,920
Yes, and all the eyeballs
are agreeing with you.
209
00:08:49,964 --> 00:08:52,836
"The owner is definitely
on the prickly side."
210
00:08:54,098 --> 00:08:57,362
Oh, ooh, oh, look at,
"Watch out for Mr. Grumpy."
211
00:08:58,625 --> 00:09:00,801
Look, these are all
five-star reviews, though.
212
00:09:00,844 --> 00:09:02,759
This is how
you earn the sticker.
213
00:09:02,803 --> 00:09:04,021
Ooh, "crusty."
214
00:09:04,065 --> 00:09:06,937
Ooh, yup, yup.
"Crotchety."
215
00:09:10,158 --> 00:09:12,856
CHILDREN [singing]:
♪ Oh, freedom ♪ Freedom
216
00:09:12,900 --> 00:09:14,945
♪ Freedom [off-key]: ♪ Freedom
217
00:09:14,989 --> 00:09:16,120
♪ Freedom
218
00:09:16,164 --> 00:09:17,992
♪ Freedom... Stop.
219
00:09:18,035 --> 00:09:19,297
Stop, stop, stop.[music stops]
220
00:09:19,341 --> 00:09:21,169
Okay. [chuckles]
221
00:09:21,212 --> 00:09:24,085
William, Phoebe, I think
you two will be happier
222
00:09:24,128 --> 00:09:26,522
in the rhythm section.
We all will.
223
00:09:28,002 --> 00:09:30,874
Okay, now, let's take it back
224
00:09:30,918 --> 00:09:32,789
to the top.[music starts playing]
225
00:09:32,833 --> 00:09:34,965
CHILDREN:
♪ Oh, freedom
226
00:09:35,009 --> 00:09:37,533
[off-key]: ♪ Freedom, freedom ♪ Freedom
227
00:09:37,577 --> 00:09:39,796
♪ Freedom ♪ Freedom...
228
00:09:39,840 --> 00:09:42,407
Stop!
[music stops]
229
00:09:42,451 --> 00:09:43,974
Ugh, Grover,
230
00:09:44,018 --> 00:09:47,804
you are croaking
like a frog. Stand up.
231
00:09:47,848 --> 00:09:50,198
I need for you to sing
from your diaphragm, okay?
232
00:09:50,241 --> 00:09:52,983
We're gonna take you up
an octave, Froggy, all right?
233
00:09:53,027 --> 00:09:54,550
♪ Ah
♪ Ah
234
00:09:54,594 --> 00:09:56,596
♪ Ah, ah
♪ Ah
235
00:09:56,639 --> 00:09:57,597
♪ Ah...
Yes!
236
00:09:57,640 --> 00:10:00,991
That's your
sweet spot, Kermit.
237
00:10:01,035 --> 00:10:02,297
[laughter]
238
00:10:02,340 --> 00:10:04,516
Hey, hey, hey, hey,
don't laugh.
239
00:10:04,560 --> 00:10:05,692
Some of y'all
sound like
240
00:10:05,735 --> 00:10:07,389
you got your fingers
slammed in a car door.
241
00:10:10,479 --> 00:10:12,263
Let's go. Again.
242
00:10:13,917 --> 00:10:16,180
This is gonna take a week?
243
00:10:16,224 --> 00:10:17,399
Well, it wouldn't
take a week
244
00:10:17,442 --> 00:10:19,880
if you ever
changed your oil.
245
00:10:19,923 --> 00:10:22,186
Man, you sound like
my father.
246
00:10:22,230 --> 00:10:25,015
Well, I am not your father
because, if I was,
247
00:10:25,059 --> 00:10:28,192
I'd take your car
and give you a bike.
248
00:10:28,236 --> 00:10:29,977
Now take that
to your real daddy.
249
00:10:33,589 --> 00:10:37,201
So, Calvin, just curious,
250
00:10:37,245 --> 00:10:38,899
how do you think that guy's
feeling right now?
251
00:10:38,942 --> 00:10:42,293
[chuckling] Probably stupid
for not changing his oil.
252
00:10:42,337 --> 00:10:44,948
Okay, you know what,
uh, let me rephrase.
253
00:10:44,992 --> 00:10:47,255
What do you think that guy's
gonna say on Yelp?
254
00:10:47,298 --> 00:10:49,257
"Five stars"?
255
00:10:51,085 --> 00:10:52,956
"Guy reminds me of my father"?
256
00:10:54,349 --> 00:10:56,612
Come on, Dave, come on,
don't-don't get in my head
257
00:10:56,656 --> 00:10:58,092
about this.Well, I don't want to,
258
00:10:58,135 --> 00:11:00,268
but with Yelp comes
tremendous responsibility.
259
00:11:00,311 --> 00:11:02,444
I don't want
the responsibility,
260
00:11:02,487 --> 00:11:04,620
I just want the sticker.
261
00:11:04,664 --> 00:11:07,188
You have to earn the sticker.
262
00:11:07,231 --> 00:11:09,886
Now, it's not
that not hard.
263
00:11:09,930 --> 00:11:11,888
You just got to add
a little bit of sunshine.
264
00:11:11,932 --> 00:11:15,283
Now, I've taken the liberty of
making you a little cheat sheet.
265
00:11:15,326 --> 00:11:18,286
Here, "Number one,
ask them how they're doing,
266
00:11:18,329 --> 00:11:19,896
i.e. how their day is."
267
00:11:19,940 --> 00:11:23,117
Their day is terrible.
Their car's broken.
268
00:11:23,160 --> 00:11:24,596
Ugh.
269
00:11:24,640 --> 00:11:27,077
Calvin, come on,
just try it out.
270
00:11:27,121 --> 00:11:30,080
[sighs] All right,
I'll give it a shot,
271
00:11:30,124 --> 00:11:31,908
man.
Okay, look.
272
00:11:31,952 --> 00:11:33,083
[laughs] Yeah, all right.
273
00:11:33,127 --> 00:11:35,607
Hello. Welcome
to Calvin's Pit Stop.
274
00:11:35,651 --> 00:11:38,523
How are you today?
I'd really like to know.
275
00:11:46,227 --> 00:11:47,576
Hey.
276
00:11:47,619 --> 00:11:50,274
Hello, again. How are you?
277
00:11:50,318 --> 00:11:53,190
I need to dump some used
motor oil. Where do I put it?
278
00:11:53,234 --> 00:11:54,626
I'll tell you
where you can put it.
279
00:11:54,670 --> 00:11:56,498
You can put it...[coughs]
280
00:11:58,630 --> 00:12:02,286
Look, I'm sorry, but we only
do that for our customers.
281
00:12:02,330 --> 00:12:06,073
But the recycling center is just
a mile up Lincoln in Altadena.
282
00:12:06,116 --> 00:12:07,596
It's a lovely drive, by the way.
283
00:12:07,639 --> 00:12:08,989
All right, fine.
284
00:12:09,032 --> 00:12:10,338
[Calvin chuckles]
285
00:12:10,381 --> 00:12:13,558
Be sure to love us on Yelp.
286
00:12:13,602 --> 00:12:15,038
Man...
287
00:12:15,082 --> 00:12:16,213
You see that...
288
00:12:16,257 --> 00:12:17,562
Calvin, that showed
amazing restraint.
289
00:12:17,606 --> 00:12:20,652
It sure did.
Did you hear him?Yeah.
290
00:12:20,696 --> 00:12:21,958
"I want
to recycle my oil."
291
00:12:22,002 --> 00:12:24,047
You know what?
I was about to recycle...
292
00:12:24,091 --> 00:12:26,310
Hey, hello.
293
00:12:26,354 --> 00:12:28,138
Welcome to Calvin's Pit Stop.
294
00:12:28,182 --> 00:12:31,141
How can I turn
your Monday a fun day?
295
00:12:31,185 --> 00:12:32,752
Nailed it.
296
00:12:39,628 --> 00:12:41,369
So, I wanted
to show you
297
00:12:41,412 --> 00:12:43,588
what I'm gonna do
with my class tomorrow.
298
00:12:43,632 --> 00:12:45,460
Nobody can teach the difference
299
00:12:45,503 --> 00:12:47,767
between major
and minor keys like
300
00:12:47,810 --> 00:12:50,334
Stevie Wonder. [laughs]
301
00:12:50,378 --> 00:12:51,683
Ooh. Whew.
302
00:12:51,727 --> 00:12:54,948
This is gonna blow
their little unformed minds.
303
00:12:54,991 --> 00:12:56,819
That's awesome.
304
00:12:56,863 --> 00:12:59,779
You're doing a great job.
It's just...
305
00:12:59,822 --> 00:13:01,781
these kids are
pretty sheltered,
306
00:13:01,824 --> 00:13:03,739
and I'm afraid
you're being a
307
00:13:03,783 --> 00:13:06,611
teensy bit... blunt.
308
00:13:06,655 --> 00:13:08,004
Yup. That's me.
309
00:13:08,048 --> 00:13:10,485
[laughs]Yeah.
310
00:13:10,528 --> 00:13:11,791
And that's great.
311
00:13:11,834 --> 00:13:13,923
It's just, maybe you're
a little too blunt.
312
00:13:13,967 --> 00:13:17,492
Just a teensy weensy bit.
313
00:13:17,535 --> 00:13:19,755
Okay, so let me
get this straight.
314
00:13:19,799 --> 00:13:22,497
I'm being
"a teensy weensy bit...
315
00:13:22,540 --> 00:13:23,628
too blunt"?
316
00:13:23,672 --> 00:13:26,022
Just try to remember
they're children.
317
00:13:26,066 --> 00:13:28,982
Children with parents who aren't
shy about calling the principal.
318
00:13:29,025 --> 00:13:30,505
But, again,
319
00:13:30,548 --> 00:13:33,900
you're doing great,
so great.
320
00:13:33,943 --> 00:13:36,641
So great, but too blunt, huh?
321
00:13:36,685 --> 00:13:38,513
Just an eensy, teensy,
weensy bit. [chuckles]
322
00:13:38,556 --> 00:13:40,515
And pretty, so pretty.
323
00:13:45,041 --> 00:13:47,000
Whoo! Oh, man!
324
00:13:47,043 --> 00:13:48,871
Man, it's been
a long time.
325
00:13:48,915 --> 00:13:50,394
Last time
I was out like this,
326
00:13:50,438 --> 00:13:53,006
I was a desperate single guy,
striking out with hot women.
327
00:13:53,049 --> 00:13:55,008
[laughs]
328
00:13:55,051 --> 00:13:57,053
Well, it's a grind
out here, man.
329
00:13:57,097 --> 00:13:59,490
You know, you are lucky
you are not on the hunt anymore.
330
00:13:59,534 --> 00:14:01,536
Hey, what can I say, baby?
I'm a lucky man.
331
00:14:01,579 --> 00:14:03,364
[laughs]
[scoffs] Yeah, right.
332
00:14:06,019 --> 00:14:07,977
I am in your way. Forgive me.
333
00:14:08,021 --> 00:14:11,546
Oh, don't worry.
I'll find a way to squeeze in.
334
00:14:17,030 --> 00:14:19,032
What the hell was that?
What?
335
00:14:20,816 --> 00:14:22,078
She was hitting
on you, man.
336
00:14:22,122 --> 00:14:24,646
No, really?
Yes, really.
337
00:14:25,734 --> 00:14:26,953
Save my spot.
338
00:14:26,996 --> 00:14:29,738
At all costs.
[chuckles] Okay.
339
00:14:29,781 --> 00:14:32,393
This spot right here?
Okay, I got it.
Mm-hmm.
340
00:14:32,436 --> 00:14:34,438
[grunting, whooshing]
341
00:14:34,482 --> 00:14:37,746
You're dancing
with me.
342
00:14:37,789 --> 00:14:40,531
[chuckles]Who are you?
343
00:14:40,575 --> 00:14:42,664
I don't know.
344
00:14:46,407 --> 00:14:48,888
[grunts]
Uh-oh.
345
00:14:50,933 --> 00:14:52,065
Baby, why are you frowning?
346
00:14:52,108 --> 00:14:54,023
I can't help it, bae.
347
00:14:54,067 --> 00:14:57,548
I've been fake-smiling all day.
348
00:14:57,592 --> 00:14:59,899
It's like my face
been doing squats.
349
00:15:01,509 --> 00:15:03,859
But, apparently,
that's what you have to do
350
00:15:03,903 --> 00:15:06,079
if I want to get
one of these Yelp stickers.
351
00:15:07,123 --> 00:15:10,518
I mean, God forbid I look
at somebody the wrong way,
352
00:15:10,561 --> 00:15:12,433
and they write a bad review.
353
00:15:13,738 --> 00:15:15,392
Well, that's ridiculous,
Calvin.
354
00:15:15,436 --> 00:15:16,785
Your customers
have always loved you.
355
00:15:16,828 --> 00:15:18,134
I know.
356
00:15:18,178 --> 00:15:19,875
So what if
I'm prickly?
357
00:15:19,919 --> 00:15:22,660
I am who I am.
Exactly.
358
00:15:22,704 --> 00:15:23,966
You know,
like today,
359
00:15:24,010 --> 00:15:25,968
Gemma told me that
I was too blunt.
360
00:15:26,012 --> 00:15:27,535
What's wrong with blunt?
361
00:15:27,578 --> 00:15:28,840
Nothing.
362
00:15:28,884 --> 00:15:31,104
It's not my job
to lie to those kids.
363
00:15:31,147 --> 00:15:33,410
They need honesty
if they're gonna do better.
364
00:15:33,454 --> 00:15:35,978
You know what,
if we are guilty of anything,
365
00:15:36,022 --> 00:15:37,632
it's that
we care too much.
366
00:15:37,675 --> 00:15:38,894
Boom.
367
00:15:38,938 --> 00:15:40,809
[grunts]
368
00:15:40,852 --> 00:15:43,159
I actually like
your bluntness.
369
00:15:43,203 --> 00:15:45,814
Mm.
You are a strong,
blunt woman.
370
00:15:45,857 --> 00:15:47,163
Mm-hmm.
371
00:15:47,207 --> 00:15:49,731
And I like that
you're prickly, you know?
372
00:15:49,774 --> 00:15:51,515
That means
you don't take any crap.
373
00:15:51,559 --> 00:15:54,910
You mess with a porcupine,
your behind's gonna get pricked.
374
00:15:54,954 --> 00:15:56,825
[laughs]
375
00:15:56,868 --> 00:15:59,001
You see, that's why
we are a great couple.
376
00:15:59,045 --> 00:16:01,612
Mm. That's right,
that's right.
377
00:16:01,656 --> 00:16:03,919
Um, baby,
may I be blunt?
378
00:16:03,963 --> 00:16:06,748
I wish that you would.
379
00:16:06,791 --> 00:16:09,011
I want to take you
to the bedroom
380
00:16:09,055 --> 00:16:12,797
and do 17 nasty
things to you.
381
00:16:12,841 --> 00:16:13,973
Seventeen?
382
00:16:15,626 --> 00:16:18,847
Ooh, can we do nine
and get some rest?
383
00:16:20,675 --> 00:16:23,678
No? Well, how about I lay
there, and we can do 12?
384
00:16:32,643 --> 00:16:34,645
[Marty laughing]
385
00:16:37,083 --> 00:16:38,823
Valerie! Valerie.
386
00:16:38,867 --> 00:16:41,739
Valerie, I...
I'm an engaged man.
387
00:16:41,783 --> 00:16:43,872
A very, very flattered
engaged man.
388
00:16:43,915 --> 00:16:45,134
Okay. [laughing]
389
00:16:48,703 --> 00:16:50,487
I feel like a piece of meat,
390
00:16:50,531 --> 00:16:52,489
but I did get a free margatini.
391
00:16:52,533 --> 00:16:55,144
I figured it out.
392
00:16:55,188 --> 00:16:57,494
You know, it all
makes sense now.
393
00:16:57,538 --> 00:17:00,106
See, it used to be,
in situations like this, you...
394
00:17:00,149 --> 00:17:02,151
you always had an air
of desperation about you.
395
00:17:02,195 --> 00:17:04,849
Yeah, no argument there.
396
00:17:04,893 --> 00:17:07,156
But now that
you have a fiancée,
397
00:17:07,200 --> 00:17:08,940
it is totally
different.
398
00:17:08,984 --> 00:17:10,942
You see,
the desperation is gone.
399
00:17:10,986 --> 00:17:12,857
You're loose
and-and funny,
400
00:17:12,901 --> 00:17:14,903
and you are not even
trying at all.
401
00:17:14,946 --> 00:17:16,078
Why didn't I have
this superpower
402
00:17:16,122 --> 00:17:17,558
when I could've enjoyed it?
403
00:17:17,601 --> 00:17:19,647
That is the irony,
my brother.
404
00:17:19,690 --> 00:17:22,693
You only have it
because you don't need it.
405
00:17:22,737 --> 00:17:24,913
You know, this is fun,
man, but...
406
00:17:24,956 --> 00:17:27,176
I am over this dating scene.
407
00:17:27,220 --> 00:17:29,048
got to be honest,
lil' bro...
408
00:17:30,571 --> 00:17:32,660
...I envy what you have
with Necie.
409
00:17:32,703 --> 00:17:34,792
Aw, man.
410
00:17:34,836 --> 00:17:36,925
You know, if you want
to find the one,
411
00:17:36,968 --> 00:17:38,187
you got to meet her
somewhere, right?
412
00:17:38,231 --> 00:17:40,711
Yeah.
Let me
413
00:17:40,755 --> 00:17:42,148
use my powers for good.
414
00:17:42,191 --> 00:17:44,019
What do you mean?
415
00:17:44,063 --> 00:17:46,239
Excuse me, miss.
416
00:17:46,282 --> 00:17:48,589
Do you like Idris Elba?Yes, I do.
417
00:17:48,632 --> 00:17:51,722
Okay, well, what if Idris
was younger, more athletic,
418
00:17:51,766 --> 00:17:53,768
and had a job coaching baseball
at one of the most prestigious
419
00:17:53,811 --> 00:17:55,161
universities in
Southern California?
420
00:17:55,204 --> 00:17:56,684
Whoa, you do?
421
00:17:56,727 --> 00:17:57,902
No, girl. Look at me.
422
00:17:59,861 --> 00:18:02,342
No, I struck out at kickball,
and I'm engaged, but...
423
00:18:03,691 --> 00:18:06,215
...this is my brother,
and he is a catch.
424
00:18:06,259 --> 00:18:07,956
[clears throat]
Hey, I'm Malcolm.
425
00:18:07,999 --> 00:18:09,349
Six two.
426
00:18:09,392 --> 00:18:11,873
Hi, Malcolm. Uh, come sit
with me and my friends.
427
00:18:11,916 --> 00:18:14,571
Oh, I would love to.
428
00:18:14,615 --> 00:18:16,095
Can you do
a British accent?
429
00:18:16,138 --> 00:18:19,010
[British accent]:
I do believe I can.[laughs]
430
00:18:22,188 --> 00:18:24,146
Oh, hey, Calvin.
431
00:18:24,190 --> 00:18:26,888
So, you just wait out here?
432
00:18:26,931 --> 00:18:29,108
Sometimes I do, yes.
433
00:18:30,805 --> 00:18:33,242
What do you want?
Okay, well,
434
00:18:33,286 --> 00:18:35,592
despite my intentions,
which were
435
00:18:35,636 --> 00:18:37,594
very, very good...
436
00:18:37,638 --> 00:18:38,987
[sighs] I messed up.
437
00:18:40,858 --> 00:18:42,208
What the hell?
438
00:18:42,251 --> 00:18:45,254
So my rating went down
a half a star?
439
00:18:45,298 --> 00:18:48,127
I know. Scroll down.
440
00:18:48,170 --> 00:18:50,912
"The owner smiled
the whole time,
441
00:18:50,955 --> 00:18:52,174
it was creepy."
442
00:18:54,263 --> 00:18:56,265
Oh, and then
there's this one.
443
00:18:56,309 --> 00:18:59,050
"Expect a lot
of mindless chitchat."
444
00:18:59,094 --> 00:19:00,791
In my defense,
445
00:19:00,835 --> 00:19:03,794
I happen to love
mindless chitchat.
446
00:19:03,838 --> 00:19:06,014
You know, I should've
followed my instincts.
447
00:19:06,057 --> 00:19:08,799
It just didn't feel right
being so nice.
448
00:19:10,845 --> 00:19:12,673
I'm done, Dave.
449
00:19:12,716 --> 00:19:14,327
I'm bringing back
old Calvin,
450
00:19:14,370 --> 00:19:16,938
and if that doesn't give me
a sticker, then so be it.
451
00:19:16,981 --> 00:19:18,722
No, y-you are getting
that sticker
452
00:19:18,766 --> 00:19:20,942
because you're
a great mechanic.
453
00:19:20,985 --> 00:19:22,639
Look, you were getting
nothing but five stars
454
00:19:22,683 --> 00:19:23,945
until I started getting
in your head.
455
00:19:23,988 --> 00:19:25,120
You're damn right I was.
456
00:19:25,164 --> 00:19:27,122
Yes, you were, and you want
to know why?
457
00:19:27,166 --> 00:19:29,255
Because people
love Prickly Calvin.
458
00:19:30,734 --> 00:19:32,823
I love
Prickly Calvin.
459
00:19:32,867 --> 00:19:34,869
I know you do.
460
00:19:34,912 --> 00:19:36,740
Now get the hell out of my way.
461
00:19:39,221 --> 00:19:40,396
Hey, Calvin.
462
00:19:42,311 --> 00:19:43,965
Welcome back.
463
00:19:51,059 --> 00:19:53,061
CHILDREN:
♪ Freedom
464
00:19:53,104 --> 00:19:55,063
♪ Freedom ♪ Oh, freedom
465
00:19:55,106 --> 00:19:56,891
♪ Freedom
466
00:19:56,934 --> 00:19:59,110
♪ Freedom ♪ Oh, freedom
467
00:19:59,154 --> 00:20:02,113
♪ Freedom, freedom ♪ Freedom
468
00:20:02,157 --> 00:20:03,767
♪ Oh, freedom, oh, freedom
469
00:20:03,811 --> 00:20:06,857
♪ Freedom.
470
00:20:06,901 --> 00:20:10,818
Yes! I love it.
471
00:20:10,861 --> 00:20:14,300
That was almost beautiful.
472
00:20:14,343 --> 00:20:17,085
You little germ buckets
can sing.
473
00:20:17,128 --> 00:20:20,741
All right, give me some,
give me some, give me some.
474
00:20:20,784 --> 00:20:24,397
Okay, okay, now,
run me my props.
475
00:20:24,440 --> 00:20:26,268
I think that's what
I'm about to do.
476
00:20:28,009 --> 00:20:29,924
Tina, I'm blown away.
477
00:20:29,967 --> 00:20:32,100
Oh, of course you are.
And by the way?
478
00:20:32,143 --> 00:20:33,928
Five more kids
showed up this week,
479
00:20:33,971 --> 00:20:35,756
and two of them
can actually sing.
480
00:20:35,799 --> 00:20:37,453
[both laugh]
481
00:20:37,497 --> 00:20:39,368
That's great.
Uh-huh.
482
00:20:39,412 --> 00:20:41,022
Look, Gemma, I, um,
483
00:20:41,065 --> 00:20:42,937
I know you're in
a tough position,
484
00:20:42,980 --> 00:20:44,765
but... I got to be me.
485
00:20:44,808 --> 00:20:46,506
And I want you to be.
486
00:20:46,549 --> 00:20:48,290
If I'm gonna be good at my job,
487
00:20:48,334 --> 00:20:49,944
I've got to hire
the best people....
Mm.
488
00:20:49,987 --> 00:20:51,380
...and you are the best.
Mm.
489
00:20:51,424 --> 00:20:53,252
You can be as blunt
as you want to be.
490
00:20:53,295 --> 00:20:55,123
Good. [chuckles]
'Cause those pants
491
00:20:55,166 --> 00:20:56,472
aren't doing your butt
any favors.
34436
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