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1
00:00:01,283 --> 00:00:03,118
[?]
2
00:00:03,119 --> 00:00:04,403
[DOORBELL RINGS]
3
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[RAZOR BUZZING]
4
00:00:08,324 --> 00:00:10,075
[DOORBELL RINGS]
5
00:00:19,519 --> 00:00:20,719
[RAZOR BUZZING] Master?
6
00:00:20,720 --> 00:00:22,186
[DOORBELL RINGS]
7
00:00:30,329 --> 00:00:32,063
Hello, my name is Harry Huggins.
8
00:00:32,064 --> 00:00:33,565
Is Major Nelson home?
9
00:00:33,566 --> 00:00:36,835
Oh, yes, but he...
He's, uh, occupied.
10
00:00:36,836 --> 00:00:38,437
You're, uh,
Mrs. Nelson?
11
00:00:38,438 --> 00:00:40,856
Oh, not yet,
but I am very hopeful.
12
00:00:40,857 --> 00:00:44,276
Oh, Major Nelson
is quite fond of me.
13
00:00:44,277 --> 00:00:47,112
I am his, uh, housekeeper.
14
00:00:47,113 --> 00:00:48,180
Yes.
15
00:00:48,181 --> 00:00:50,866
Well, uh, may I wait
for Major Nelson?
16
00:00:50,867 --> 00:00:53,535
Oh, certainly.
Please, come in.
17
00:00:53,536 --> 00:00:54,752
Thank you.
18
00:00:58,174 --> 00:01:00,675
Tiny, little place, isn't it?
19
00:01:00,676 --> 00:01:02,877
Tiny?
Boxy.
20
00:01:02,878 --> 00:01:05,513
They don't build houses
the way they used to.
21
00:01:05,514 --> 00:01:07,415
Pity.
22
00:01:07,416 --> 00:01:09,017
No taste.
23
00:01:09,018 --> 00:01:11,319
Major Nelson
has wonderful taste.
24
00:01:11,320 --> 00:01:12,921
Uh-huh.
25
00:01:12,922 --> 00:01:15,890
Grand Rapids Renaissance.
26
00:01:15,891 --> 00:01:18,559
You must see
the rest of the house.
27
00:01:18,560 --> 00:01:20,678
[?]
28
00:01:26,802 --> 00:01:28,036
Why that...
29
00:01:28,037 --> 00:01:30,071
That looks like a Louis XV.
30
00:01:30,072 --> 00:01:32,007
Oh, it is.
31
00:01:32,008 --> 00:01:34,108
Why, it must be worth a fortune.
32
00:01:34,109 --> 00:01:35,744
Oh, yes.
33
00:01:35,745 --> 00:01:38,847
Money means nothing
to Major Nelson.
34
00:01:50,576 --> 00:01:53,678
That's a copy of a Renoir.
35
00:01:54,630 --> 00:01:56,481
It is no copy.
36
00:01:56,482 --> 00:01:59,751
A real Renoir?
37
00:01:59,752 --> 00:02:01,686
In Cocoa Beach?
38
00:02:01,988 --> 00:02:03,939
Of course.
39
00:02:11,296 --> 00:02:15,616
Uh, be careful of Major
Nelson's genuine Ming vase.
40
00:02:16,952 --> 00:02:18,719
Ming vase?
41
00:02:18,720 --> 00:02:22,290
I told you Major Nelson
has wonderful taste.
42
00:02:22,291 --> 00:02:25,293
Does he keep any cash
in the house?
43
00:02:25,294 --> 00:02:27,095
Cash?
44
00:02:27,096 --> 00:02:28,563
[GIGGLES]
45
00:02:28,564 --> 00:02:31,499
That safe is full of cash.
46
00:02:33,902 --> 00:02:36,671
Full of cash?
Mm-hm.
47
00:02:43,111 --> 00:02:45,496
It's like a museum.
48
00:02:45,497 --> 00:02:48,066
Do you take care
of this house yourself?
49
00:02:48,067 --> 00:02:51,886
Oh, no. Major Nelson
has many servants.
50
00:02:55,858 --> 00:02:57,859
[?]
51
00:03:01,964 --> 00:03:03,898
Uh, no, thank you.
52
00:03:03,899 --> 00:03:06,234
The others are off today.
53
00:03:08,537 --> 00:03:10,738
No, thank you.
Good morning.
54
00:03:10,739 --> 00:03:13,607
Oh, good morning, master.
55
00:03:13,608 --> 00:03:14,943
You have a visitor.
56
00:03:14,944 --> 00:03:16,577
Major Nelson.
Huh?
57
00:03:16,578 --> 00:03:17,778
I'm Harry Huggins.
58
00:03:17,779 --> 00:03:19,680
Department of Internal Revenue.
59
00:03:21,000 --> 00:03:22,333
[?]
60
00:03:24,570 --> 00:03:26,371
[?]
61
00:04:13,703 --> 00:04:15,704
[?]
62
00:04:20,192 --> 00:04:22,110
I-I'm sorry, d-did you say
63
00:04:22,111 --> 00:04:24,378
the Department of Internal Revenue?
Yes.
64
00:04:24,379 --> 00:04:27,916
I have a refund here for you
on your last year's income tax.
65
00:04:27,917 --> 00:04:30,135
Seventeen dollars
and fifty cents.
66
00:04:30,136 --> 00:04:31,519
Since I live
in the neighborhood,
67
00:04:31,520 --> 00:04:33,888
I just thought
I'd drop it by myself.
68
00:04:33,889 --> 00:04:35,239
Well, thank you,
Mr. Huggins.
69
00:04:35,240 --> 00:04:38,677
I'll just keep this until
we finish the investigation.
70
00:04:38,678 --> 00:04:39,627
Investigation?
71
00:04:39,628 --> 00:04:40,845
Major, this house
72
00:04:40,846 --> 00:04:44,115
is the Cocoa Beach branch
of the Louvre.
73
00:04:44,967 --> 00:04:46,117
[CHUCKLING] I'm sorry.
74
00:04:46,118 --> 00:04:47,319
I don't seem to understand.
75
00:04:47,320 --> 00:04:49,237
Your housekeeper
76
00:04:49,238 --> 00:04:50,522
was kind enough
77
00:04:50,523 --> 00:04:53,274
to show me your treasures.
78
00:04:53,275 --> 00:04:55,610
Oh, I see.
What, uh...?
79
00:04:55,611 --> 00:04:58,379
What treasures were you kind
enough to show Mr. Huggins?
80
00:04:58,380 --> 00:04:59,814
Oh, you know, master,
81
00:04:59,815 --> 00:05:03,585
your, uh, Louis XV,
your Renoir, your Ming.
82
00:05:03,586 --> 00:05:05,503
[LAUGHING]
Oh! Oh, those treasures.
83
00:05:05,504 --> 00:05:08,904
TONY: You sure you
didn't forget anything?
84
00:05:09,274 --> 00:05:10,541
Oh.
85
00:05:11,660 --> 00:05:12,977
The statue.
86
00:05:14,130 --> 00:05:17,248
Is that a Michelangelo?
87
00:05:17,249 --> 00:05:19,017
TONY: I wouldn't be
at all surprised.
88
00:05:19,018 --> 00:05:20,535
Are you quite through?
89
00:05:20,536 --> 00:05:24,705
I have not had so much fun
in a long time, master.
90
00:05:24,706 --> 00:05:26,391
Would you like to see
something else?
91
00:05:26,392 --> 00:05:28,777
No, I've, uh...
I've seen more than enough,
92
00:05:28,778 --> 00:05:30,061
thank you.
93
00:05:30,062 --> 00:05:31,563
I'll be back here in the morning
94
00:05:31,564 --> 00:05:33,148
with the assessor.
95
00:05:33,149 --> 00:05:35,249
Mr. Huggins, uh,
all of this...
96
00:05:35,250 --> 00:05:37,351
All of this
is not what it seems.
97
00:05:37,352 --> 00:05:38,787
[LAUGHING] Oh, you're...
98
00:05:38,788 --> 00:05:39,988
As soon as I tell you the truth,
99
00:05:39,989 --> 00:05:41,138
you're gonna get a big laugh.
100
00:05:41,139 --> 00:05:43,375
[BOTH LAUGHING]
101
00:05:43,376 --> 00:05:45,660
Oh, I'm dying
to hear all about it.
102
00:05:45,661 --> 00:05:48,246
Well, Jeannie does, uh, these...
103
00:05:48,247 --> 00:05:50,215
We like to call 'em tricks.
104
00:05:50,216 --> 00:05:51,416
None of this is genuine.
105
00:05:51,417 --> 00:05:53,801
Of course it is genuine.
Would you hold this a moment?
106
00:05:53,802 --> 00:05:55,069
Yes.
And stand right there.
107
00:05:55,070 --> 00:05:57,238
You see, the Michelangelo
and the Renoir
108
00:05:57,239 --> 00:05:59,740
and the Ming and whatever,
well, they're all just...
109
00:05:59,741 --> 00:06:01,075
Just junk.
110
00:06:01,076 --> 00:06:02,509
[CHUCKLES]
111
00:06:02,510 --> 00:06:04,611
Well, I'd like to say,
my guess is,
112
00:06:04,612 --> 00:06:06,914
this junk's gonna run
somewhere between
113
00:06:06,915 --> 00:06:10,351
20 to 30 years in prison.
114
00:06:10,352 --> 00:06:12,486
Oh, 20 to 30 years.
115
00:06:12,487 --> 00:06:15,690
And you can explain
to the government
116
00:06:15,691 --> 00:06:20,945
why none of it appeared
on your income tax, major.
117
00:06:20,946 --> 00:06:23,915
Oh, and I wouldn't touch
that safe if I were you.
118
00:06:23,916 --> 00:06:24,815
Safe?
119
00:06:24,816 --> 00:06:27,118
The one full of cash.
120
00:06:27,119 --> 00:06:28,402
Oh.
121
00:06:28,403 --> 00:06:29,871
I'll be back early
122
00:06:29,872 --> 00:06:33,841
in the morning
with the assessor.
123
00:06:35,477 --> 00:06:38,278
We showed him,
did we not, master?
124
00:06:38,279 --> 00:06:41,281
I think he was impressed.
125
00:06:41,282 --> 00:06:43,117
What made you do that?
126
00:06:43,118 --> 00:06:44,986
Why, he did not
like your house, master.
127
00:06:44,987 --> 00:06:47,655
And I did not want him
to think you were poor.
128
00:06:47,656 --> 00:06:50,691
Well, that's what I am,
a poor master. No.
129
00:06:50,692 --> 00:06:53,160
Yeah, I wake up in the morning
and I-I come down to br...
130
00:06:53,161 --> 00:06:55,763
And what do I-I...?
A Michelangelo. And a Renoir?
131
00:06:55,764 --> 00:06:57,949
And a Ming.
You gotta get rid of this.
132
00:06:57,950 --> 00:07:01,119
Oh, but I could not
do that, master.
133
00:07:01,120 --> 00:07:02,287
Why not?
134
00:07:02,288 --> 00:07:05,123
Because I want you
to have beautiful things.
135
00:07:05,124 --> 00:07:07,959
You never let me
do anything for you.
136
00:07:07,960 --> 00:07:09,177
All the other genies
137
00:07:09,178 --> 00:07:11,162
give their masters
treasures and palaces,
138
00:07:11,163 --> 00:07:13,181
and lovely silks...
Oh, jeez. I know.
139
00:07:13,182 --> 00:07:16,817
I know, but if I ever need
a treasure or a palace,
140
00:07:16,818 --> 00:07:19,337
believe me, you'll be
the first one to know.
141
00:07:19,338 --> 00:07:21,872
Well, now, get rid
of this stuff.
142
00:07:21,873 --> 00:07:23,258
No.
143
00:07:23,259 --> 00:07:25,643
Jeannie, I've gotta pay
income taxes on this.
144
00:07:25,644 --> 00:07:27,896
But why?
I gave them to you.
145
00:07:27,897 --> 00:07:29,446
Well, that doesn't
make any difference.
146
00:07:29,447 --> 00:07:31,182
I still have to pay taxes on it.
147
00:07:31,183 --> 00:07:33,951
You mean people
cannot give you gifts?
148
00:07:33,952 --> 00:07:35,386
Yeah, that's right.
149
00:07:35,387 --> 00:07:37,989
Oh, you tell your government
that is ridiculous.
150
00:07:37,990 --> 00:07:39,573
Ridiculous!
151
00:07:39,574 --> 00:07:41,508
Oh, they are so beautiful.
152
00:07:41,509 --> 00:07:42,910
Yes, I know that.
They are...
153
00:07:42,911 --> 00:07:45,179
They are you.
[SIGHS]
154
00:07:45,180 --> 00:07:47,181
Enjoy them.
Yeah, not...
155
00:07:47,182 --> 00:07:48,816
I-I just...
I just can't afford it.
156
00:07:48,817 --> 00:07:50,985
Jeannie? Now, Jeannie,
you stop that.
157
00:07:50,986 --> 00:07:52,620
Stop it this...
Jeannie!
158
00:07:52,621 --> 00:07:55,139
Come out of there.
Come on.
159
00:07:55,857 --> 00:07:57,241
Now, listen here, young lady.
160
00:07:57,242 --> 00:07:59,310
I want all this stuff gone,
you understand that?
161
00:07:59,311 --> 00:08:01,111
Gone, when I get home.
162
00:08:02,364 --> 00:08:03,364
Oh...
163
00:08:03,365 --> 00:08:07,034
He is so adorable
when he is angry.
164
00:08:07,703 --> 00:08:09,704
[?]
165
00:08:11,640 --> 00:08:15,476
You mean Jeannie gave you
a Renoir, a Michelangelo,
166
00:08:15,477 --> 00:08:17,945
and a Ming vase,
and you're complaining?
167
00:08:17,946 --> 00:08:19,914
Oh, how ungrateful can you get?
168
00:08:19,915 --> 00:08:22,116
Hey, Roger, I gotta
get rid of that stuff.
169
00:08:22,117 --> 00:08:24,118
All right. All right.
170
00:08:24,119 --> 00:08:25,620
What are friends for?
171
00:08:25,621 --> 00:08:27,522
Tell you what,
I'll take the Renoir,
172
00:08:27,523 --> 00:08:29,890
the Michelangelo,
and the Ming vase.
173
00:08:29,891 --> 00:08:31,492
You'll only get in trouble.
174
00:08:31,493 --> 00:08:33,828
Trouble? That's right.
Get in trouble.
175
00:08:33,829 --> 00:08:35,029
Uh, tell you what.
176
00:08:35,030 --> 00:08:37,632
I'll take the Renoir
and the Michelangelo.
177
00:08:37,633 --> 00:08:38,633
No.
178
00:08:38,634 --> 00:08:40,901
How 'bout just the Renoir?
No.
179
00:08:40,902 --> 00:08:43,805
Then will you buy me
a cup of coffee?
180
00:08:43,806 --> 00:08:45,640
That I got.
181
00:08:45,641 --> 00:08:47,375
Roger, don't you understand?
182
00:08:47,376 --> 00:08:50,277
I am in trouble with
the Internal Revenue Department.
183
00:08:50,278 --> 00:08:51,946
There's a guy named Huggins
on my neck.
184
00:08:51,947 --> 00:08:53,748
He's bringing an assessor
over tomorrow.
185
00:08:53,749 --> 00:08:55,717
What am I...? How am I gonna
explain all that art?
186
00:08:55,718 --> 00:08:58,353
It's very simple. All you
have to do is tell him that-
187
00:08:58,354 --> 00:08:59,354
Yeah, what? What?
188
00:08:59,355 --> 00:09:01,989
Well, you could say that, uh...
189
00:09:01,990 --> 00:09:03,290
Yeah, you got problems.
190
00:09:03,291 --> 00:09:04,425
Doesn't he always?
191
00:09:04,426 --> 00:09:06,093
What's your problem
this time, major?
192
00:09:06,094 --> 00:09:08,195
Nothing, sir. Roger and I
were talking about art.
193
00:09:08,196 --> 00:09:09,280
Yeah. About art.
194
00:09:09,281 --> 00:09:10,764
Tony is a real culture vulture.
195
00:09:10,765 --> 00:09:12,000
[CHUCKLES]
196
00:09:12,001 --> 00:09:13,184
Yes.
197
00:09:13,185 --> 00:09:15,119
The simulator's ready
for you, major.
198
00:09:15,120 --> 00:09:16,020
I'll be right along, sir.
199
00:09:16,021 --> 00:09:17,688
You gonna handle
the ground controls?
200
00:09:17,689 --> 00:09:20,792
It's the least I can do
for one of the great collectors.
201
00:09:20,793 --> 00:09:22,927
If you don't mind, major.
Yes, sir.
202
00:09:22,928 --> 00:09:25,248
You finish this, huh?
Huh? Oh, yeah.
203
00:09:27,299 --> 00:09:29,000
Here's your hat.
Roger?
204
00:09:33,621 --> 00:09:34,856
How long do I stay up, sir?
205
00:09:34,857 --> 00:09:38,226
Oh, I think, uh, 60 minutes
should be plenty.
206
00:09:38,227 --> 00:09:39,927
Beautiful piece of equipment.
207
00:09:39,928 --> 00:09:41,695
Anything that can happen
in outer space,
208
00:09:41,696 --> 00:09:42,830
can happen to you in here.
209
00:09:42,831 --> 00:09:44,698
The only difference is,
it happens in this,
210
00:09:44,699 --> 00:09:46,367
you can get home
in time for lunch.
211
00:09:46,368 --> 00:09:47,735
Home for lunch.
212
00:09:47,736 --> 00:09:49,971
Oh, shall we get started?
213
00:09:49,972 --> 00:09:51,973
[?]
214
00:10:06,237 --> 00:10:08,105
I'm gonna start him
off with some yaw.
215
00:10:08,106 --> 00:10:09,406
Let's begin at 10 degrees.
216
00:10:09,407 --> 00:10:12,176
We don't want to shake him up
too badly at first.
217
00:10:17,582 --> 00:10:18,983
Are you okay, Tony?
218
00:10:18,984 --> 00:10:21,653
TONY [OVER RADIO]:
Fine, here. Let her rip.
219
00:10:21,654 --> 00:10:23,404
Okay, hold tight.
220
00:10:23,405 --> 00:10:24,856
I'm gonna soup her up.
221
00:10:24,857 --> 00:10:26,073
I'm ready.
222
00:10:39,404 --> 00:10:41,122
Give him a 30-degree pitch.
223
00:10:41,123 --> 00:10:42,457
Yes, sir.
224
00:10:46,478 --> 00:10:48,262
How you feeling, major?
225
00:10:48,263 --> 00:10:50,231
Pretty good, sir.
226
00:10:57,523 --> 00:11:00,558
[INHALING & EXHALING]
227
00:11:00,559 --> 00:11:03,027
Well, you are in remarkably
good health, major.
228
00:11:03,028 --> 00:11:04,779
You can get dressed now.
Oh, thanks, sir.
229
00:11:04,780 --> 00:11:06,941
[PHONE RINGS] Oh, excuse me.
230
00:11:08,650 --> 00:11:10,501
Dr. Bellows.
231
00:11:10,502 --> 00:11:13,103
A visitor for me?
Who is it?
232
00:11:13,104 --> 00:11:16,040
Huggins?
[GLASS SHATTERS]
233
00:11:16,041 --> 00:11:18,342
I don't know any Huggins.
234
00:11:18,343 --> 00:11:20,811
Oh, urgent, huh?
Oh, very well.
235
00:11:20,812 --> 00:11:23,548
I'm on my way to my office now.
236
00:11:23,549 --> 00:11:25,149
I'll see you later, major.
Yes, sir.
237
00:11:25,150 --> 00:11:27,018
Uh, your shirt.
Shirt?
238
00:11:27,019 --> 00:11:28,152
Uh-uh.
239
00:11:28,153 --> 00:11:30,521
Oh, yes.
I'm sorry.
240
00:11:34,643 --> 00:11:36,563
[KNOCKING ON DOOR] Oh, come in.
241
00:11:37,112 --> 00:11:38,863
Dr. Bellows?
Yes.
242
00:11:40,866 --> 00:11:41,965
Harry Huggins.
243
00:11:41,966 --> 00:11:44,201
Mm. Sit down,
Mr. Huggins.
244
00:11:44,202 --> 00:11:46,604
Department of Internal Revenue.
245
00:11:46,605 --> 00:11:48,906
Uh, the Department of...?
246
00:11:48,907 --> 00:11:52,242
Now, if it's about that trip
I took to Jamaica last year,
247
00:11:52,243 --> 00:11:54,244
I can prove that it was
government business.
248
00:11:54,245 --> 00:11:57,281
I'm not here to, uh,
discuss you, doctor.
249
00:11:57,282 --> 00:12:01,719
But, uh, I'll certainly
make a note of that.
250
00:12:02,237 --> 00:12:03,921
Jamaica.
251
00:12:05,423 --> 00:12:09,476
No, I'm here because
something peculiar's going on
252
00:12:09,477 --> 00:12:11,712
with one of your men
at the base.
253
00:12:12,965 --> 00:12:15,466
What has Major Nelson done now?
254
00:12:15,467 --> 00:12:17,150
I didn't mention his name.
255
00:12:17,151 --> 00:12:18,770
How do you know
it was Major Nelson?
256
00:12:18,771 --> 00:12:20,571
Do you see these reports?
257
00:12:20,572 --> 00:12:23,474
They're all on Major Nelson.
258
00:12:23,475 --> 00:12:24,708
Oh?
259
00:12:24,709 --> 00:12:26,377
Well, uh, what are they about?
260
00:12:26,378 --> 00:12:28,078
Well, I wouldn't know
where to begin.
261
00:12:28,880 --> 00:12:30,731
Here's a report of a woman
262
00:12:30,732 --> 00:12:34,318
who swears she saw him
flying over Cocoa Beach.
263
00:12:34,319 --> 00:12:37,872
Well, he's a pilot, isn't he?
What's so unusual about that?
264
00:12:38,390 --> 00:12:40,124
He had no plane.
265
00:12:40,125 --> 00:12:41,793
Oh.
266
00:12:41,794 --> 00:12:45,245
A gas station attendant
saw Major Nelson's car
267
00:12:45,246 --> 00:12:47,048
go into a drive-in theater.
268
00:12:48,249 --> 00:12:50,384
Well, that doesn't seem unusual.
269
00:12:50,385 --> 00:12:51,085
Hm.
270
00:12:51,086 --> 00:12:52,870
No one was in the car.
271
00:12:53,955 --> 00:12:55,790
Oh, here's one
that will interest you.
272
00:12:55,791 --> 00:12:58,192
A witness saw it snow
on Major Nelson's house,
273
00:12:58,193 --> 00:13:01,429
but only on his house,
in the middle of July.
274
00:13:01,430 --> 00:13:02,929
[LAUGHING]
275
00:13:02,930 --> 00:13:05,566
That was obviously
some crackpot.
276
00:13:05,567 --> 00:13:08,618
It was reported by me,
Mr. Huggins.
277
00:13:09,004 --> 00:13:10,771
Oh, was it?
278
00:13:10,772 --> 00:13:12,206
I have a 117 of these.
279
00:13:12,207 --> 00:13:15,610
I'm afraid you'll have
to wait in line.
280
00:13:15,611 --> 00:13:18,713
The government doesn't wait
in line, doctor.
281
00:13:18,714 --> 00:13:21,448
I'm here to get the answers
to some questions.
282
00:13:21,449 --> 00:13:23,918
Well, I don't know whether
I can answer them, Mr. Huggins.
283
00:13:23,919 --> 00:13:26,220
You see, uh, our files
are confidential.
284
00:13:26,221 --> 00:13:28,122
I'm with the government,
remember, doctor?
285
00:13:28,123 --> 00:13:29,964
Now, that's a coincidence.
So am I.
286
00:13:31,293 --> 00:13:33,894
And I'm wearing
a uniform to prove it.
287
00:13:35,963 --> 00:13:39,333
How would you like to have
your income tax audited
288
00:13:39,334 --> 00:13:42,068
for the last five years?
289
00:13:43,905 --> 00:13:46,907
How would you
like to be drafted?
290
00:13:49,277 --> 00:13:52,479
Let me put it another way.
291
00:13:52,480 --> 00:13:56,716
My branch of the government
would appreciate cooperation
292
00:13:56,717 --> 00:13:59,320
from your branch
of the government.
293
00:13:59,321 --> 00:14:00,720
What is it you want to know?
294
00:14:01,973 --> 00:14:08,496
Would you say that Major Nelson
is a rich man?
295
00:14:08,497 --> 00:14:12,399
Well, sometimes he is,
and sometimes he isn't.
296
00:14:12,400 --> 00:14:15,268
A few weeks ago
he had $3 million
297
00:14:15,269 --> 00:14:17,337
in his Christmas club fund.
298
00:14:17,989 --> 00:14:20,224
His Christmas club fund?
299
00:14:20,225 --> 00:14:23,443
When we went to track it down,
it had vanished.
300
00:14:24,495 --> 00:14:27,098
Well, I think I found it again.
301
00:14:27,099 --> 00:14:28,215
Where?
302
00:14:28,216 --> 00:14:32,453
Sorry, we can't give out
that information.
303
00:14:34,289 --> 00:14:37,374
This is gonna mean
a nice promotion for me.
304
00:14:38,977 --> 00:14:41,879
Inspector Huggins.
305
00:14:43,348 --> 00:14:46,534
We've been after Nelson
for a long time.
306
00:14:46,535 --> 00:14:48,319
After him? For what?
307
00:14:50,038 --> 00:14:51,605
Can you keep it confidential?
308
00:14:53,208 --> 00:14:56,460
I mean, this is one branch
of the government talking to.
309
00:14:56,461 --> 00:14:58,879
[WHISPERING] another
branch of the government.
310
00:14:58,880 --> 00:15:00,214
Go ahead.
311
00:15:00,215 --> 00:15:05,168
Your Major Nelson is the head
312
00:15:05,169 --> 00:15:08,405
of an international
smuggling ring.
313
00:15:09,691 --> 00:15:11,542
[?]
314
00:15:15,781 --> 00:15:18,432
Mr. Huggins, if you told me
that Major Nelson
315
00:15:18,433 --> 00:15:20,167
could fly like a bird,
316
00:15:20,168 --> 00:15:23,904
grow apple trees in the middle
of his living room,
317
00:15:23,905 --> 00:15:27,475
talk to vacuum cleaners,
I wouldn't argue with you.
318
00:15:27,476 --> 00:15:30,177
But when you tell me
that you think he's involved
319
00:15:30,178 --> 00:15:31,979
with an international
gang of smugglers,
320
00:15:31,980 --> 00:15:35,249
oh, I'm afraid
I must disagree with you.
321
00:15:36,134 --> 00:15:37,635
Doctor,
322
00:15:40,672 --> 00:15:45,476
his salary is $950 a month.
323
00:15:46,511 --> 00:15:50,081
You show me a man
who makes that,
324
00:15:50,082 --> 00:15:54,718
who owns a Michelangelo,
a Renoir,
325
00:15:54,719 --> 00:15:57,254
and keeps six servants,
326
00:15:57,255 --> 00:15:59,774
and I'll show you a crook.
327
00:15:59,775 --> 00:16:03,060
Major Nelson is not a crook.
328
00:16:03,061 --> 00:16:05,780
These things are undoubtedly
reproductions.
329
00:16:05,781 --> 00:16:08,482
Well, if he reproduced
the safe full a cash,
330
00:16:08,483 --> 00:16:11,452
I'm even more anxious
to get my hands on it.
331
00:16:11,453 --> 00:16:12,986
That's counterfeiting.
332
00:16:14,206 --> 00:16:15,939
I've got him coming and going.
333
00:16:17,291 --> 00:16:20,427
Believe me, it's strange
to hear myself saying this,
334
00:16:20,428 --> 00:16:23,464
but I am sure
that Major Nelson is innocent.
335
00:16:24,216 --> 00:16:28,252
The curator
of the Palm Beach Museum
336
00:16:28,253 --> 00:16:30,304
is flying up in the morning.
337
00:16:30,305 --> 00:16:35,192
And, uh, what if Major Nelson
removes the things tonight?
338
00:16:35,193 --> 00:16:37,011
He'd be a fool if he didn't.
339
00:16:37,012 --> 00:16:38,545
You mean you think he will?
340
00:16:38,546 --> 00:16:42,282
Of course, doctor.
He's in a panic.
341
00:16:42,283 --> 00:16:44,518
Right at the moment,
the poor devil's out
342
00:16:44,519 --> 00:16:47,187
probably trying
to round up a truck.
343
00:16:47,188 --> 00:16:49,623
Then he's planning
to drive to the house
344
00:16:49,624 --> 00:16:53,326
and load everything
in the truck.
345
00:16:53,327 --> 00:16:56,496
And lose it somewhere.
346
00:16:56,497 --> 00:16:59,733
And, uh, what's to stop him?
347
00:16:59,734 --> 00:17:04,004
I am, Dr. Bellows.
I am!
348
00:17:04,005 --> 00:17:07,541
Mr. Huggins, you may be
an expert on financial matters,
349
00:17:07,542 --> 00:17:11,511
but I happen to be an expert
on Major Anthony Nelson.
350
00:17:11,512 --> 00:17:13,781
There's no truck.
351
00:17:13,782 --> 00:17:15,699
[?]
352
00:17:17,785 --> 00:17:19,019
[TIRES SCREECHING]
353
00:17:37,021 --> 00:17:38,722
ROGER: Have you driven
a truck before?
354
00:17:38,723 --> 00:17:39,923
TONY:
Huh?
355
00:17:43,044 --> 00:17:44,611
You sure you know
what you're doing?
356
00:17:44,612 --> 00:17:47,081
Believe me, Roge,
this is the only way out.
357
00:17:50,335 --> 00:17:51,969
Hey...
358
00:17:51,970 --> 00:17:53,037
A real Cellini.
359
00:17:53,038 --> 00:17:54,871
Michelangelo.
360
00:17:54,872 --> 00:17:56,840
Well, he could've
copied Cellini.
361
00:17:56,841 --> 00:17:59,009
Yeah. Look, let's get
this out first, huh?
362
00:17:59,010 --> 00:18:00,277
All right.
Be careful.
363
00:18:00,278 --> 00:18:02,579
It's worth about $2 million.
Two million dollars?
364
00:18:02,580 --> 00:18:04,114
Don't drop it.
Come on. Come on.
365
00:18:04,115 --> 00:18:06,050
All right. Wait a minute,
wait a minute.
366
00:18:06,051 --> 00:18:08,185
Whoa, wait a minute.
I got the heavy end.
367
00:18:08,186 --> 00:18:09,954
I know that.
Come on, let's go.
368
00:18:09,955 --> 00:18:11,721
Let me turn around here.
Wait...
369
00:18:11,722 --> 00:18:13,623
Wait a minute.
I haven't got a good grip on it.
370
00:18:13,624 --> 00:18:15,926
Okay. I got it.
I got it.
371
00:18:15,927 --> 00:18:17,745
Put your end down a minute.
Hello.
372
00:18:17,746 --> 00:18:19,914
Hello yourself. Can we get
this onto the truck?
373
00:18:19,915 --> 00:18:22,515
Put your end down, Roger.
I can't let my end down.
374
00:18:22,516 --> 00:18:24,168
I-I just got a good grip on it.
375
00:18:24,169 --> 00:18:26,520
Well, get a grip on yourself
and just put it down.
376
00:18:27,188 --> 00:18:29,773
[GRUNTING]
377
00:18:31,176 --> 00:18:33,343
Oh, you sent for help.
Good idea.
378
00:18:33,344 --> 00:18:35,212
We can use you.
Roger...
379
00:18:35,213 --> 00:18:37,013
We better get this stuff
out of here before
380
00:18:37,014 --> 00:18:39,383
the Internal Revenue Department
catches us. This is...
381
00:18:39,384 --> 00:18:41,285
Give us a hand,
we'll get this onto the truck.
382
00:18:41,286 --> 00:18:42,269
This is Mr. Huggins.
383
00:18:42,270 --> 00:18:43,938
Nice to meet you.
You want to...?
384
00:18:43,939 --> 00:18:45,859
Of the Department
of Internal Revenue.
385
00:18:46,892 --> 00:18:49,026
I guess I'd better
be running along.
386
00:18:49,027 --> 00:18:51,829
Just a moment, major.
Just a moment.
387
00:18:51,830 --> 00:18:55,365
We'll consider you
an accomplice after the fact.
388
00:18:55,366 --> 00:18:56,500
Did you hear what he said?
389
00:18:56,501 --> 00:18:57,918
An accomplice after the...
390
00:18:57,919 --> 00:19:00,254
This is a notice
of distraint, Major Nelson.
391
00:19:00,255 --> 00:19:02,522
Nothing is to be removed
from these premises
392
00:19:02,523 --> 00:19:05,775
until my assessor
gets here in the morning.
393
00:19:05,776 --> 00:19:07,744
Good day, gentlemen.
394
00:19:09,881 --> 00:19:12,282
Why do you let Jeannie
do these things to ya?
395
00:19:12,283 --> 00:19:13,950
Jeannie keeps doing
these things to me
396
00:19:13,951 --> 00:19:15,052
because she loves me.
397
00:19:15,053 --> 00:19:16,333
Yeah, she loves you.
398
00:19:17,471 --> 00:19:19,557
Well, I guess this time
you're really trapped.
399
00:19:19,558 --> 00:19:20,858
Not necessarily.
400
00:19:20,859 --> 00:19:22,325
How you figure that?
401
00:19:22,326 --> 00:19:24,995
I'm gonna outsmart her.
I'm gonna use my brain.
402
00:19:24,996 --> 00:19:26,563
Yeah, well how
you gonna do that?
403
00:19:26,564 --> 00:19:28,698
I'm gonna say,
"Jeannie, you... ".
404
00:19:28,699 --> 00:19:30,217
Hello, master.
405
00:19:30,218 --> 00:19:31,484
Oh, hello, Jeannie.
406
00:19:31,485 --> 00:19:33,687
Do you like it?
It is a Rembrandt.
407
00:19:33,688 --> 00:19:36,523
Oh, it's absolutely lovely.
It's what I've always wanted.
408
00:19:36,524 --> 00:19:38,242
Oh.
My own Rembrandt.
409
00:19:38,243 --> 00:19:40,527
You mean you are not going
to ask me to return it?
410
00:19:40,528 --> 00:19:42,896
No, of course not.
I wouldn't dream of it.
411
00:19:42,897 --> 00:19:44,732
Oh, lovely.
412
00:19:44,733 --> 00:19:47,051
It'll go well with my
Michelangelo, don't you think?
413
00:19:47,052 --> 00:19:48,719
Are you...?
Are you out of your mind?
414
00:19:48,720 --> 00:19:51,605
You realize what's gonna happen
when Huggins finds that picture?
415
00:19:51,606 --> 00:19:53,007
Well, don't worry about it.
416
00:19:53,008 --> 00:19:54,708
Don't worry?
Don't worry.
417
00:19:54,709 --> 00:19:56,870
Just for that I'm gonna ask
for separate cells.
418
00:19:57,862 --> 00:19:59,330
Jeannie,
I'd like you to get ahold
419
00:19:59,331 --> 00:20:01,332
of all the old masters
you can lay your hands on.
420
00:20:01,333 --> 00:20:04,268
Oh, yes, master.
Oh, uh, wait, wait, wait.
421
00:20:04,269 --> 00:20:07,671
Now, this is not
the right surroundings for it.
422
00:20:07,672 --> 00:20:09,005
Could you...?
423
00:20:09,006 --> 00:20:12,008
Could you blink
a villa in Tangiers?
424
00:20:12,009 --> 00:20:15,412
Oh, yes, master.
Hey, I get it.
425
00:20:15,413 --> 00:20:16,580
You'll have your turn next.
426
00:20:16,581 --> 00:20:17,681
And while you're at it,
427
00:20:17,682 --> 00:20:19,383
you might as well blink
all the statuary
428
00:20:19,384 --> 00:20:20,917
and the paintings and everything
429
00:20:20,918 --> 00:20:22,085
to the Tangiers villa, hm?
430
00:20:22,086 --> 00:20:25,322
You are right, master.
431
00:20:25,323 --> 00:20:27,140
Oh!
What is it?
432
00:20:27,141 --> 00:20:29,460
Jeannie, take this with...
433
00:20:29,461 --> 00:20:32,062
Oh, Mr. Huggins,
I thought you'd gone.
434
00:20:32,063 --> 00:20:34,798
To tell the truth, I couldn't
bear to tear myself away
435
00:20:34,799 --> 00:20:36,467
from these beautiful things.
436
00:20:36,468 --> 00:20:38,719
So I've decided
to spend the night here with,
437
00:20:38,720 --> 00:20:42,139
uh, Michelangelo.
438
00:20:42,140 --> 00:20:43,724
Oh.
439
00:20:43,725 --> 00:20:45,225
[?]
440
00:20:48,296 --> 00:20:50,180
[?]
441
00:20:50,181 --> 00:20:52,032
[DOORBELL RINGS]
442
00:20:52,033 --> 00:20:55,535
That must be Professor Preever,
our little art expert.
443
00:20:59,741 --> 00:21:00,908
[DOOR OPENS]
444
00:21:00,909 --> 00:21:02,709
Come in, professor.
445
00:21:02,710 --> 00:21:04,310
Ah. How do you do?
446
00:21:04,311 --> 00:21:07,748
Can't you, uh, just smell
the Cellini in the air?
447
00:21:07,749 --> 00:21:08,849
[LAUGHS]
448
00:21:08,850 --> 00:21:11,385
This is Major Nelson.
How do you do, sir?
449
00:21:11,386 --> 00:21:13,253
Major Healey.
450
00:21:13,254 --> 00:21:14,921
Professor Preever.
451
00:21:14,922 --> 00:21:16,757
Gentlemen.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
452
00:21:16,758 --> 00:21:19,393
I'll get it. I'll get it.
No, I'll get it.
453
00:21:19,394 --> 00:21:21,194
Oh, you get it.
Huh?
454
00:21:21,195 --> 00:21:23,697
Oh, Dr. Bellows.
What are you doing here, sir?
455
00:21:23,698 --> 00:21:25,164
Hello, major.
456
00:21:25,165 --> 00:21:28,435
I came to offer my services.
Oh, that's very kind of you.
457
00:21:28,436 --> 00:21:30,704
You're a lot of things,
major. A lot of things.
458
00:21:30,705 --> 00:21:33,440
But you're not
an international smuggler.
459
00:21:33,441 --> 00:21:35,442
[?]
460
00:21:36,744 --> 00:21:38,678
I think you're
going to find this
461
00:21:38,679 --> 00:21:41,281
a very exciting morning,
professor.
462
00:21:41,282 --> 00:21:44,718
For instance, here we have
463
00:21:44,719 --> 00:21:47,754
a genuine Ming vase.
464
00:21:53,911 --> 00:21:56,446
What would you say it was worth?
[SNIFFS]
465
00:21:56,447 --> 00:21:59,649
About a dollar and a quarter.
466
00:22:02,736 --> 00:22:05,439
"Made in... Japan."
467
00:22:05,440 --> 00:22:06,923
I knew it.
468
00:22:06,924 --> 00:22:09,810
I didn't know how,
but I knew it.
469
00:22:09,811 --> 00:22:11,945
They have the Renoir.
470
00:22:17,619 --> 00:22:19,870
With a mustache?
471
00:22:19,871 --> 00:22:21,739
I used to have an aunt
who looked like that.
472
00:22:21,740 --> 00:22:23,020
[ROGER LAUGHING]
473
00:22:24,242 --> 00:22:26,176
That wasn't there yesterday.
474
00:22:40,641 --> 00:22:42,709
Six fingers?
475
00:22:44,479 --> 00:22:46,229
This some sort
of practical joke?
476
00:22:46,230 --> 00:22:47,531
You bring me all the way here
477
00:22:47,532 --> 00:22:50,500
and show me
a collection of junk?
478
00:22:50,501 --> 00:22:53,570
I don't understand.
479
00:22:53,571 --> 00:22:55,705
How 'bout the safe
full of money?
480
00:23:01,412 --> 00:23:02,913
[BELLOWS GASPS]
481
00:23:11,522 --> 00:23:14,424
It's Confederate.
482
00:23:14,425 --> 00:23:16,926
Confederate?
483
00:23:16,927 --> 00:23:19,095
How...?
How 'bout the gold?
484
00:23:21,031 --> 00:23:23,783
[SIGHS]
485
00:23:23,784 --> 00:23:25,218
Hm.
486
00:23:25,219 --> 00:23:26,719
Try one.
487
00:23:33,061 --> 00:23:35,395
Chocolate.
488
00:23:35,396 --> 00:23:37,865
I'll send you my bill.
489
00:23:37,866 --> 00:23:39,599
BELLOWS: Major...
HUGGINS: Professor...
490
00:23:39,600 --> 00:23:41,501
just a minute. BELLOWS:
I can't tell you
491
00:23:41,502 --> 00:23:45,772
what a pleasure it is to see you
do it to someone else.
492
00:23:47,108 --> 00:23:50,610
About your trip
to Jamaica, Dr. Bellows,
493
00:23:50,611 --> 00:23:54,881
you did say it was strictly
government business?
494
00:23:54,882 --> 00:24:00,287
Now, why don't you level with me
for the rest of the afternoon?
495
00:24:00,922 --> 00:24:02,856
Whew.
496
00:24:04,558 --> 00:24:05,926
Huh?
497
00:24:05,927 --> 00:24:07,727
Oh. Oh, thank you,
Jeannie,
498
00:24:07,728 --> 00:24:09,496
but I never want
to go through that again.
499
00:24:09,497 --> 00:24:10,764
Neither do I.
500
00:24:10,765 --> 00:24:13,000
Well, it is
your own fault, master.
501
00:24:13,001 --> 00:24:14,834
My fault?
Yes.
502
00:24:14,835 --> 00:24:17,237
You should've told me that
it would get you into trouble.
503
00:24:17,238 --> 00:24:18,405
I never would've done that.
504
00:24:18,406 --> 00:24:19,572
There were many ways
505
00:24:19,573 --> 00:24:21,574
I could have impressed
that nasty, little man.
506
00:24:21,575 --> 00:24:23,243
He did not have
to come into your house.
507
00:24:23,244 --> 00:24:25,245
[?]
508
00:24:27,198 --> 00:24:29,082
[?]
509
00:24:29,132 --> 00:24:33,682
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