All language subtitles for I Dream of Jeannie s01e27 My Master, the Thief.eng

[???]

[SIGHS]

Jeannie, would you
like part of the paper?

[GIGGLING] Oh, master.

Oh, thank you, master.

Oh, the newspapers
remind me of the old days.

The old days? Mm.

Two thousand years ago.

Really?

Nothing but floods, wars
and juvenile delinquency.

[GASPS]

Master! Oh, look, look!

What?

The museum is having
an exhibit for Bukistan.

How about that?

Oh, master, I used
to live in Bukistan.

Oh, please take me.

What, to Bukistan?

Ooh, no. To the museum.

Oh, well, I'm not really
very much for museums.

And besides, I'm
not even dressed.

Ah.

The minute I opened my mouth,
I knew I shouldn't have said it.

Shall we go, master?

You've talked me into it.

[???]

Oh, this is it.

Oh, I'm so excited.

I could spend days here.

Well, I can only give
you 15 minutes, Jeannie.

I've got to be back at the base.

Oh, master, look at that sword.

Yeah.

Oh, they do not make
them like that anymore.

Yeah. I hope not.

Look at that sword.

My slippers!

What's the matter
with your slippers?

Oh, no, no, no, master.
Those slippers in the case.

They are mine. Ah.

Those are my favorite slippers.

Well, no, no. How could
they be your slippers, Jeannie?

They belonged to a, um, Princess
Muphista, whoever she was.

I know who she was.

She was a fat thief.

And I want my slippers back.

Shh, shh. Jeannie.

Would you mind
lowering your voice?

These people are staring.

Oh, but they are mine.

Yeah, well,
slippers are slippers.

They probably
just look like yours.

Oh, no, master.

You see there, there
where the tassel is missing?

That happened when
the caliph danced with me,

and he stepped on my foot.

Come on over here.

You see there. See that little
broken place near the heel?

Yeah.

Well, that happened
when I became angry,

and I threw the
slipper at the princess.

[BOTH LAUGHING]

Oh, believe me, master.

I would know those
slippers anywhere.

Ooh, and I must have them back.

No, no, no,
Jeannie. You mustn't.

They don't belong
to you anymore.

They're on loan from the
Bukistanian government.

Well, how can the
Bukistan government

loan what belongs to me?

Jeannie, that's just the point.

You see, they don't
belong to you anymore.

I am terribly sorry.
I am terribly sorry.

Now, come on. Nice museum.

Wonderful exhibit!

You are right, master.

Why make a fuss about a pair of
2000-year-old slippers anyway?

Yeah.

[???]

Good morning, Major Nelson.

Oh, hello, Alice.

You never call me anymore.

Uh, well, I'm sorry.

I'm... I'm engaged in a
little experimental work.

Experimenting, huh?

See you later.

A robbery by
someone in this base?

That's hard to believe.

Nothing shocks a psychiatrist.

Hello, major. Sir.

Hey, Tony, have you
heard about the big robbery?

No, but if it's somebody on
the base, I hope they catch him.

Oh, we'll catch him, all right.

What was stolen, sir? Well...

Some joker broke into the
museum and stole a valuable pair

of old slippers that
were on exhibit.

Old slippers, huh?

Yes.

They were 2000
years old, and priceless.

The museum guard
says that an officer left

just before the slippers
were discovered missing.

He's sure he can identify him.

Isn't that a lucky break?

Oh, yeah, yeah. Very lucky.

We have a list of all the
officers who were off duty

at the time of the robbery.

We're gonna check
that list out very carefully.

And by tonight, he'll
probably be in prison.

Probably.

I can tell you right
now who the thief is.

Oh, you can, sir?

Yes, I certainly can.

The man we are looking for...

is a psychopath.

Psychopath?

Really... A psychopath, sir?

With a fetish for women's shoes.

A fet... How do
you know that, sir?

There were things in that
case much more valuable,

and yet the thief
took only the slippers.

I know this sounds far-fetched,
sir, but couldn't it be possible

that the thief was trying to
reclaim his rightful property?

Oh, come now, Major Nelson.

A pair of
2000-year-old slippers?

No, no, no, no, no.

The man we're
looking for is desperate,

cunning and very ingenious.

And we are going to find him.

Oh, yeah.

Sir, well, if there is
anything I can do to help, sir,

why, just let me know.

After all, they're
just slippers.

Is this worth all
the fuss over it?

No, it might be only a pair of
slippers to you, Major Nelson,

but to the Bukistanian
government

it's a national insult.

An insult.

I've just been with
General Peterson.

Oh?

The Bukistanian ambassador
has lodged a formal protest

and informed the State
Department that unless

those slippers are returned
within the next 24 hours,

they're going to
consider this theft

a deliberate affront
to their government.

You know something,
sir, I don't blame them.

What are you, some kind of
an expert in international affairs?

Excuse me, sir, I've
got some work to do.

What did I say?

Jeannie! Jeannie!

Young lady, I want to
have a little talk to you.

Are they not beautiful, master?

Hm? And they fit perfectly.

I was afraid that my feet
might have grown in 2000 years.

Do you know what
you've done to me?

Oh, I have done
nothing to you, master.

You've done nothing! If you
don't give those slippers back,

I'm going to go to jail,

the United States is going
to go to war with Bukistan.

But they belong to me, master.

Jeannie, you are
missing the point.

That exhibition was on loan.

The United States government
was responsible for those slippers.

Oh, and they took very
good care of these for me.

I'm grateful.

But would you not think
that they would at least

have put the tassel
back on, master?

Jeannie, you're
not listening to me.

Now, I want those slippers
back in a glass case.

As you wish, master.

Oh, aren't they lovely?

[SCOFFS]

Not... Not there. I
want them in a museum.

[GIGGLES]

Jeannie, you're going to
return those slippers right now.

Oh, I like it when you
are forceful, master.

Sometimes you have to be.

Oh, I would do anything
to make you happy, master.

That's my girl.

Except return these slippers.

Now, wait a minute. Listen, I...

I cannot tell you how
much I love them.

I must buy something
to go with them.

How about the pyramids?

Oh, that is a wonderful idea!

No, no, no. I take it back.

Look, I-I'll tell
you what I'll do.

If you'll give me
those slippers,

I'll buy you a dozen
pair just like them, huh?

[GIGGLING]

No, master.

I will keep these.

I'll, um... I'll let you
drive the car, Jeannie.

You'll love that, huh? Huh?

No, master.

Well, I'll, uh... I'll
take you dancing.

How about that, huh?

[CRASH]

No, master.

I will keep these slippers.

This time, Jeannie, I'm afraid
I'm going to have to insist.

[LAUGHING]

Jeannie, you cut that out!
Now, come on, cut it out!

[LAUGHING] Oh, you.

Jeannie!

Now, come on.

Jeannie, y-you
come out of there.

Now, I mean it.

Jeannie, this is your
master speaking.

Can you hear me?

I'm gonna count to three.

One, two, th...

Hey, has Dr. Bellows
called you yet?

No, no. Why should he call me?

Well, you know those men
he was talking about? Yeah.

Well, Dr. Bellows asked the
museum guard to come out

and look at some of the men,

and they've got the
list down to three men.

Uh, Tony, what would you
want with a pair of old slippers?

I mean, it goes terrible
with your uniform.

Roger.

Well, I mean, I'm just
saying that... Jeannie?

That's right.

The slippers are Jeannie's.

She ran across
them at the museum.

Well, tell her to
give them back.

She's supposed to obey you.

Yeah, well, I know she's
supposed to obey me,

but she doesn't know
she's supposed to obey me.

I made a big mistake when
I found her on that beach.

I said she was free.

Why couldn't I have picked up
an everyday, normal male genie?

Ha!

Well, what are you gonna do?

I'm, uh... I'm gonna let
her keep the slippers.

You're what? Yeah, yeah.

Sure, sure. Why not?

I'm going to let her keep them.

She's, uh... They're hers.

They belong to her.
She should keep them.

After all, what's
fair is fair, right?

What's fair is fair.

What's fair is fair is fair.

"I am going to trick..."

Roger, I have a
lot to do right now.

We all got a lot to do. Right?

Sure, listen, if anybody
c-calls, don't answer, right?

Thanks a lot.
Nice talking to you.

Uh, Jeannie, uh, you
can come out now.

Oh, thank you, master, but
I'm very comfortable in here.

Well, I... I'll just make
an early night of it.

I'll get a little sleep.

Good night, Jeannie.

Good night, master.

Well, good morning, Rififi.

How's the international
slipper thief?

Well, I'll tell you how I am.

If I don't get those slippers
back to the museum,

I'm going to start a
war with Bukistan.

I thought you were
going to trick her.

Well, I tried. It didn't work.

I tried to get her out of
the bottle this morning.

She wouldn't budge.

What's she being so
unreasonable about?

Well, she's not really.

When you come down
to it, they are her slippers.

I feel like a heel trying to
get them away from her.

You've got an
interesting choice.

You can be a live
heel or a dead hero.

If Dr. Bellows can prove
you're mixed up in this thing,

he'll nail you to
his wall as a trophy.

I'm not really worried
about Dr. Bellows.

You see... [PHONE RINGS]

Yes.

Oh, hello, Dr. Bellows.

Can I come over to
your office right away?

No. I mean, uh, I can
as soon as I finish the job

I'm in the middle of.

Well, it... It shouldn't
take too long, sir.

At least I hope not.

Yes, sir. Yes, sir.

I'll be over.

Well, I have an uncle in
the insurance business.

If you'd like a letter of
recommendation, why, I...

If I can get those slippers
back in the museum

before my meeting
with Dr. Bellows,

they'll be so happy, they
won't care who stole them.

Hello. Oh, hello, Jeannie?

Hello, master.

Did you sleep well?

Oh, yes, I did.

And, uh...? And you?

Oh, I slept very
well, thank you.

Jeannie, I've been thinking.

I, uh... I really think you
ought to keep the slippers.

Oh! You do?

Yes, of course. I mean,
after all, they're yours.

Oh.

Thank you, master.

And to celebrate, I'm going
to take you and Roger to lunch.

Oh, I will enjoy that.

Roger always wanted
to go to Maxim's in Paris.

I did?

I did. Oh, yes.

Oh, I love French food.

Of course, when
I first tried it,

France was called Gaul.

Gaul?

Hey, can you imagine
going into a restaurant

and asking for some
Gaul-fried potatoes?

Uh, Jeannie, naturally
we couldn't take you out

dressed like that.

Oh, oh, well, that
is no problem.

Hey, hey!

Oh, does this look
better, master?

Very nice.

That's wonderful, Jeannie.

Uh, you know, I... I
don't think the slippers

go with that outfit.

I like the slippers
with the outfit.

[CLEARS THROAT]

Why don't you change your shoes,

and you can leave your slippers

right here in my drawer?

For safekeeping, hm?

Well, i-if you are sure that
nothing will happen to them.

Well, what could possibly
happen to them in my office?

[MUMBLES]

Very well then.

Are these better, master?

Oh, those are beautiful.
Aren't they, Roge?

Yeah.

Thank you.

Thank... Thank you.

Well, that's taken care of.

Hey, listen, I'm starved.

Can we go now? Oh, so am I.

Mm, hungry. Overseas operator.

What are you calling
the overseas operator for?

I'm calling Maxim's
to make a reservation.

You can't just walk in there.

Oh, that will not be
necessary, master.

I can make a reservation.

How?

I will go there and make it.

No, I don't want to
put you to any trouble.

Oh, it's no trouble, master.

I will not be gone long.

Well...

Oh, boy, this is the greatest
idea you've ever had.

I've never been
to Maxim's before.

Mm. I'm hungry too.

What are you doing? Huh?

I'm going to take these
back to that museum.

You mean we're
not going to Maxim's?

Roger, get with it, will you?

I never thought
I'd see these again.

And we've got to work fast.

We've got to work fast?

I've got to do it before my
meeting with Dr. Bellows.

Since we're not
going to Maxim's,

can we pick up a
cheeseburger or something?

He's got the stolen
slippers in a shoebox.

That's right, general.

I don't believe it.

I saw it myself.

If you'll come to his office
right now, you'll catch him.

Doctor, if you're
wasting my time again...

General, if I'm
wasting your time,

I'll eat the shoebox.

Let's go.

How are we going to get the
slippers back into the museum?

I don't know. We've
got to find a way, fast.

Wait, wait, wait. Ah-ha!

I caught you!

How was Maxim's?

Maxim's is not open for lunch.

You lied to me.

I am going to turn you
into a three-headed toad.

Wait, don't do anything
you're going to be sorry for.

I've never seen a
three-headed toad before.

Jeannie, I'm
sorry I lied to you.

I was desperate.

[SQUEALS]

Well, are you going to turn
him into a three-headed toad?

Roger, will you
stay out of this?

PETERSON: I'm
warning you, doctor.

This is the last time.

Jeannie!

There it is, general.

Well, I guess I better
be running along.

You stay right here.

Right here, sir.

What have you got
in the box, Tony?

The box, sir? The box. Oh, yes.

That shoebox. Oh.

Now, I wonder what
could be in a shoebox?

Shoes, perhaps?

Stolen shoes, perhaps?

I've waited a long time
for this, Major Nelson.

I have no intention of gloating.

I'm simply going to use
this as the basis of getting to

the bottom of a lot of
things that need explaining.

Open the box, major.

Well, I... I'd really
rather not, sir.

I have some kind of
personal things in there.

I hate to insist, Tony,
but since Dr. Bellows

has made this accusation,
I'm afraid I'll have to.

Well, really, there's
no need to, sir.

You see, I can
explain what's in it.

I have this friend of mine...

I'll open it myself.

It's a lobster.

Well, yes, of course
it's a lobster, sir.

I love lobster.

Doctor?

Yes, general.

Jeannie.

Hey, hey, what's going on?

What are you doing?

I am leaving, master.

I will not stay in
a den of thieves.

[CHUCKLING] A den of thieves?

Look who's talking.

Now, all right, all right.

I'll take you to Maxim's.

And you can keep
your slippers on.

Oh, master, I did not care that
you did not take me to Maxim's.

It just hurt me
that you lied to me.

I'm sorry.

I-I didn't mean to hurt you.

Let's forget about the
whole thing, all right?

Do you mean that?

Yeah, I really do.

All right?

All right.

[BOTH CHUCKLING]

Why don't you unpack
your suitcases now, huh?

Oh, that will not be
necessary, master.

The suitcases are empty.

[PHONE RINGS]

Yeah.

Yeah. It figures.

Hello. Major Nelson here.

Oh, yes, Dr. Bellows.

You have the museum
guard with you there?

And you want me to
come over right away.

Well... it's a little late, sir.

N... Yes, sir,
I'll be right over.

I've got to go over
to Dr. Bellows' office.

About my slippers?

Yeah, yeah. But don't worry.

I'll work it out.

Well, very well, master.

I will get dressed,

and when you come back,
we will go out to dinner.

I may be a little delayed.

How long?

I'd rather not think about that.

Oh, hey, Tony, you've
got to get out of town.

Dr. Bellows has the museum
guard in his office now.

Yeah, yeah, I know.

I'm on my way
over there right now.

Well, I will go take my shower.

Shower?

Oh, you can't... You
can't go there now.

That's impossible.
They'll identify you.

Yeah, I know, I know.
But if I don't go over there,

Dr. Bellows is going to
send the tank corps after me.

Did you see his face
when he ate that shoebox?

This time he's got me.

That's too bad.

You put up a good fight.

Thanks.

Oh, don't forget about my uncle.

Your uncle?

The insurance business.

Jeannie, I'm leaving now.

I'll be back as soon as
I finish with Dr. Bellows.

Can you hear me?

Where are we going?

I need your help.

Come on!

Wait a minute!

[WHISPERING] Give me the keys.

Come on, give me the keys.

I need the keys!
Give them to me.

[CAR APPROACHING]

Shh!

[GRUNTING]

[WHISPERS] Give me the shoes.

Come on, come on.

Uh, major, uh...

Oh, I'm sorry I'm late, sir.

Well, it, um... It
doesn't matter.

I don't need you any longer.

You don't need me any longer?

Uh, no.

The thief broke into the museum
again and returned the slippers.

No. Yes.

The criminal mind is
an amazing thing, isn't it?

Major, some day...

not today and
perhaps not tomorrow,

but some day...

[SIGHS]

Whew.

Master. Oh!

Hello, Jeannie.

Jeannie, you're going to hate
me for this, but... I had to do it.

I had to return your slippers.

Oh!

Now, they're in the
museum where they belong.

And I want you to promise
me that they're going to stay

exactly where they are.

Well, if that is what
you wish, master.

Believe me, if you knew
all the trouble I went through

to put those things back,
that's exactly what I wish.

Very well, master.

[???]

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