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00:00:01,868 --> 00:00:05,038
(funky disco plays)
♪ My name is Cleveland Brown
2
00:00:05,039 --> 00:00:06,969
♪ And I am proud to be
3
00:00:06,974 --> 00:00:09,144
♪ Right back in my hometown
4
00:00:09,143 --> 00:00:12,043
♪ With my new family
5
00:00:12,046 --> 00:00:14,046
♪ There's old friends
and new friends ♪
6
00:00:14,048 --> 00:00:16,378
♪ And even a bear
7
00:00:16,384 --> 00:00:18,984
♪ Through good times
and bad times ♪
8
00:00:18,986 --> 00:00:20,216
♪ It's true love we share
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00:00:20,221 --> 00:00:22,651
♪ And so I found a place
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00:00:22,656 --> 00:00:25,056
♪ Where everyone will know
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00:00:25,059 --> 00:00:26,889
♪ My happy mustached face
12
00:00:26,894 --> 00:00:28,994
♪ This is
The Cleveland Show. ♪
13
00:00:28,996 --> 00:00:31,196
(chuckles)
14
00:00:32,899 --> 00:00:36,069
Uncle Sam's
black dwarf nephew says,
15
00:00:36,070 --> 00:00:38,200
"Donna Tubbs
for School Board."
16
00:00:38,205 --> 00:00:41,865
"A vote for Tubbs is a
vote for Donna Tubbs."
17
00:00:41,876 --> 00:00:43,836
Here's another
6,000 fliers.
18
00:00:43,844 --> 00:00:45,014
How many do
you have left?
19
00:00:45,012 --> 00:00:46,712
6,000.
20
00:00:46,714 --> 00:00:48,254
Isn't it kind of
against your cause
21
00:00:48,249 --> 00:00:51,149
to keep us out of school
to do this?
22
00:00:51,152 --> 00:00:52,522
I don't want to hear
your complaints
23
00:00:52,520 --> 00:00:55,720
about being tired, poor
or yearning to be free.
24
00:00:55,723 --> 00:00:59,063
I have waited 16 years for
this board seat to open up.
25
00:00:59,060 --> 00:01:01,930
There is no position
in a small town
26
00:01:01,929 --> 00:01:03,999
that gives you more power
than the school board.
27
00:01:03,998 --> 00:01:06,698
Your dreams is small.
28
00:01:06,700 --> 00:01:09,170
"Are," Rallo, "Are."
29
00:01:09,170 --> 00:01:10,770
A school board member
30
00:01:10,771 --> 00:01:13,171
cannot have children
who speak ungrammatically.
31
00:01:13,174 --> 00:01:17,044
Our family must and shall
exude sophistication.
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00:01:17,044 --> 00:01:18,044
Look what I found:
33
00:01:18,045 --> 00:01:20,345
A pancake
somebody ran over.
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00:01:25,018 --> 00:01:26,548
(grunting)
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00:01:26,554 --> 00:01:28,454
A vote for Tubbs
is a vote for Donna Tubbs.
36
00:01:28,456 --> 00:01:30,186
It's a waffle.
37
00:01:30,191 --> 00:01:31,291
I found a waffle.
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00:01:31,292 --> 00:01:33,192
Cleveland,
what did I tell you
39
00:01:33,194 --> 00:01:35,064
about putting our
best foot forward
40
00:01:35,062 --> 00:01:37,032
when I'm running
for school board?
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00:01:37,031 --> 00:01:38,801
Now, my hands are sticky
from the syrup,
42
00:01:38,799 --> 00:01:40,099
and as you'll notice,
43
00:01:40,101 --> 00:01:42,201
I've broken free
from my boxer shorts.
44
00:01:42,203 --> 00:01:43,573
Can a brother get a tuck?
45
00:01:43,571 --> 00:01:47,111
Cleveland, this election
is very important to me.
46
00:01:47,108 --> 00:01:48,068
I found another waffle.
47
00:01:48,075 --> 00:01:49,575
Oh, my God!
48
00:01:49,577 --> 00:01:51,637
Look, just
behave yourself.
49
00:01:51,645 --> 00:01:53,545
At least until
the election's over.
50
00:01:53,547 --> 00:01:54,547
But of course.
51
00:01:54,548 --> 00:01:55,978
(grunting quietly)
52
00:01:55,983 --> 00:01:57,323
If you'll excuse me,
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00:01:57,318 --> 00:02:00,148
I have now broken
free in the back.
54
00:02:02,622 --> 00:02:05,122
Gentlemen, I present to you
55
00:02:05,126 --> 00:02:07,286
the Hurt Locker game.
56
00:02:07,294 --> 00:02:09,064
(cheering)
57
00:02:09,063 --> 00:02:11,763
Okay, that cardboard box
over by the Dumpster
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00:02:11,765 --> 00:02:15,325
contains a C4-loaded
IED plastic explosive.
59
00:02:15,336 --> 00:02:18,766
Which one of us is going
to try to defuse it first?
60
00:02:18,772 --> 00:02:20,012
Lester?
Mm-mm.
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00:02:20,007 --> 00:02:21,607
Tim?
Mm-mm.
62
00:02:21,609 --> 00:02:23,139
Holt?
Mm-mm.
63
00:02:23,144 --> 00:02:25,084
Franklin, the 49-year-old
bankruptcy lawyer
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00:02:25,079 --> 00:02:26,979
we just started
hanging out with this week?
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00:02:26,981 --> 00:02:28,411
Hells, yeah,
I'll do it.
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00:02:28,415 --> 00:02:30,075
Cleveland, you've
really made me feel
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00:02:30,084 --> 00:02:31,524
like part of the gang.
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00:02:31,519 --> 00:02:34,089
I look forward to years
of misadventures with you.
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00:02:34,088 --> 00:02:36,088
As us also do we.
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00:02:36,090 --> 00:02:37,560
Duck for cover!
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00:02:47,200 --> 00:02:49,170
(over radios):
Whoa! Wow!
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00:02:49,170 --> 00:02:51,640
Awesome!
Holy (bleep)!
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00:02:51,639 --> 00:02:54,109
Franklin, that was so cool.
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00:02:54,108 --> 00:02:56,208
Better luck next time, buddy.
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00:02:56,210 --> 00:02:57,280
Franklin, do you copy?
76
00:02:57,278 --> 00:02:59,378
Franklin?
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00:02:59,380 --> 00:03:01,650
(Holt over radio):
Big Brown, this is Muscle Milk. Over.
78
00:03:01,649 --> 00:03:03,619
I think something's wrong
with Franklin's headset.
79
00:03:03,617 --> 00:03:04,947
Oh, God.
80
00:03:04,952 --> 00:03:06,152
(over radio):
Guys, it's Gus.
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00:03:06,153 --> 00:03:08,393
Those hot wings
you ordered are ready.
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00:03:08,389 --> 00:03:11,489
Hope this isn't a bad time.
Over.
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00:03:11,492 --> 00:03:14,362
No, Gus,
you were right to tell us.
84
00:03:14,361 --> 00:03:16,231
(sobbing)
85
00:03:16,230 --> 00:03:18,060
This would be a good example
86
00:03:18,065 --> 00:03:20,395
of what I was talking about
when I told you to behave.
87
00:03:20,401 --> 00:03:21,971
Going to a funeral?
88
00:03:21,969 --> 00:03:23,169
Causing the funeral
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00:03:23,170 --> 00:03:25,300
by blowing up some guy
outside a bar.
90
00:03:25,306 --> 00:03:27,306
When did you get
so uptight?
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00:03:27,308 --> 00:03:30,678
I'm gonna go
sit up front.
92
00:03:30,678 --> 00:03:32,038
(sobbing)
93
00:03:32,046 --> 00:03:34,546
I'm so sorry for your loss.
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00:03:34,548 --> 00:03:38,678
Donna Tubbs for School Board.
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00:03:38,686 --> 00:03:41,086
(bell ringing)
96
00:03:41,088 --> 00:03:42,888
Look at y'all.
97
00:03:42,890 --> 00:03:44,860
Do I need to find
Dracula's coffin
98
00:03:44,858 --> 00:03:46,358
and remove the stake
from his heart
99
00:03:46,360 --> 00:03:48,260
to see a decent sit-up
around here?
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00:03:52,865 --> 00:03:54,765
(whistles)
101
00:03:54,768 --> 00:03:57,198
The utensil that goes
both ways.
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00:03:57,204 --> 00:03:59,404
I see you've forgotten
your gym clothes
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00:03:59,406 --> 00:04:01,236
for the third time
this week.
104
00:04:01,242 --> 00:04:03,212
You have surpassed
the maximum allowance
105
00:04:03,210 --> 00:04:05,940
of 90 gym class absences
per semester,
106
00:04:05,946 --> 00:04:07,746
and will fail P.E.
107
00:04:07,748 --> 00:04:09,178
Isn't there
anything I can do
108
00:04:09,183 --> 00:04:10,183
to save my future?
109
00:04:10,184 --> 00:04:12,454
Yes, you can
receive the credit
110
00:04:12,453 --> 00:04:14,123
by signing up
for a sport.
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00:04:14,121 --> 00:04:15,121
Any sport.
112
00:04:15,122 --> 00:04:16,462
Celebrity poker?
113
00:04:16,457 --> 00:04:18,687
That is no longer
offered at this school
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00:04:18,692 --> 00:04:21,292
since David Spade impregnated
the volleyball team.
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00:04:21,295 --> 00:04:22,555
(grunting)
116
00:04:22,563 --> 00:04:24,263
Wah.
Wah.
117
00:04:24,265 --> 00:04:26,265
This is as tall
as I'm gonna get.
118
00:04:31,204 --> 00:04:33,374
So, you think the
diving team, huh?
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00:04:33,374 --> 00:04:34,574
Well, how would
I get up there?
120
00:04:34,575 --> 00:04:35,965
Would a crane lift me?
121
00:04:35,976 --> 00:04:38,136
Or does the board lower
to get me or...
122
00:04:38,145 --> 00:04:40,205
No, you would have
to climb the ladder.
123
00:04:40,214 --> 00:04:41,914
Ehh.
124
00:04:41,915 --> 00:04:43,715
But everything else
is just falling.
125
00:04:43,717 --> 00:04:45,217
Falling on purpose?
126
00:04:45,219 --> 00:04:46,719
I'll give it a shot.
127
00:04:46,720 --> 00:04:48,450
Good work, Ernie.
128
00:04:49,422 --> 00:04:51,222
Hi. Cleveland Brown, Jr.
129
00:04:51,225 --> 00:04:53,225
I've got to sign up
for some stupid sport.
130
00:04:53,227 --> 00:04:54,257
Fine.
131
00:04:54,261 --> 00:04:55,461
Go for it.
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00:04:55,462 --> 00:04:57,702
May God have mercy
on the pool.
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00:04:58,598 --> 00:05:03,068
(light grunting)
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00:05:03,070 --> 00:05:06,340
(panting)
135
00:05:06,340 --> 00:05:07,770
(laughing)
136
00:05:07,775 --> 00:05:09,405
Give him a chance.
137
00:05:09,410 --> 00:05:12,840
Four eyes, full gut.
Can't lose.
138
00:05:17,317 --> 00:05:19,277
(gasping)
139
00:05:19,286 --> 00:05:21,286
I haven't seen
a tuck that good
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00:05:21,288 --> 00:05:24,158
since Silenceof the Lambs.
141
00:05:24,158 --> 00:05:25,418
You're on the team.
142
00:05:25,426 --> 00:05:26,256
Hooray.
143
00:05:26,260 --> 00:05:28,290
My GPA is saved.
144
00:05:28,295 --> 00:05:31,295
Congratulations,
Junior.
145
00:05:31,298 --> 00:05:32,998
Welcome aboard, son.
146
00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:34,530
Here's your uniform.
147
00:05:34,535 --> 00:05:38,465
Okay, that'll hold one
of my nards.
148
00:05:38,472 --> 00:05:39,602
What about
the other one?
149
00:05:39,606 --> 00:05:41,336
That's your
entire uniform.
150
00:05:45,645 --> 00:05:48,345
I knew I shouldn't have
eaten all that food.
151
00:05:51,050 --> 00:05:53,650
To Franklin,
who never saw it coming.
152
00:05:53,654 --> 00:05:55,824
And apparently
never saw Hurt Locker.
153
00:05:55,823 --> 00:05:57,863
ALL:
To Franklin.
154
00:05:57,858 --> 00:06:02,158
Anyway, I told Donna
I am who I am
155
00:06:02,162 --> 00:06:04,302
and I'm going to behave
like I am going to behave.
156
00:06:04,298 --> 00:06:06,468
Is that why you're not
157
00:06:06,467 --> 00:06:08,867
at the school board
candidates' dinner tonight?
158
00:06:08,869 --> 00:06:10,799
Candidates' dinner tonight?
159
00:06:10,804 --> 00:06:12,574
Oh, God,
she probably told me about it
160
00:06:12,573 --> 00:06:14,043
and I wasn't listening.
161
00:06:14,041 --> 00:06:15,071
Wait a minute.
162
00:06:15,075 --> 00:06:16,305
How do you know
about it?
163
00:06:16,310 --> 00:06:17,410
I follow Donna
on Twitter.
164
00:06:17,411 --> 00:06:20,151
It's a very serious,
solemn, unfunny account.
165
00:06:20,147 --> 00:06:21,377
That's her.
166
00:06:21,382 --> 00:06:23,352
She always retweets
medical scares.
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00:06:23,350 --> 00:06:25,050
I got to get
to that dinner.
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00:06:25,052 --> 00:06:26,492
Gus, a suit.
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00:06:26,487 --> 00:06:28,147
48 stout.
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00:06:28,155 --> 00:06:29,445
GUS:
You got it!
171
00:06:31,190 --> 00:06:33,730
Excuse me. I'm looking
for the boring dinner.
172
00:06:33,727 --> 00:06:36,427
Well, let's see:
there's the seminar on pet insurance,
173
00:06:36,430 --> 00:06:39,330
the Harry's Law Fan Fiction
Convention
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00:06:39,333 --> 00:06:40,373
and then, worst of all,
175
00:06:40,367 --> 00:06:42,497
the School Board
Candidates' Dinner.
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00:06:42,503 --> 00:06:43,503
Thanks.
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00:06:43,504 --> 00:06:45,404
And he realized
then and there,
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00:06:45,406 --> 00:06:48,706
it was truly Harry's law.
179
00:06:48,709 --> 00:06:51,279
You never even saw
the show, did you?
180
00:06:51,278 --> 00:06:52,838
No, but was I close?
181
00:06:52,846 --> 00:06:53,676
Yes.
182
00:06:53,680 --> 00:06:55,410
Donna's dinner!
183
00:06:58,384 --> 00:06:59,794
EMCEE:
Next, please welcome
184
00:06:59,787 --> 00:07:01,517
Candidate Donna Tubbs
and her husband...
185
00:07:01,522 --> 00:07:02,792
Just in time.
186
00:07:02,790 --> 00:07:05,420
Cleveland Brown.
187
00:07:05,426 --> 00:07:06,356
(gasping):
Oh, my God.
188
00:07:06,360 --> 00:07:08,130
Donna's replaced me?
189
00:07:08,128 --> 00:07:11,428
Or what if that is me up there
190
00:07:11,432 --> 00:07:15,132
and I've stepped through a
break in the time-space continuum?
191
00:07:15,135 --> 00:07:17,395
It's me,
Future Cleveland.
192
00:07:17,404 --> 00:07:20,414
I've come to tell you that
that's not what happened.
193
00:07:20,407 --> 00:07:21,437
She did replace you.
194
00:07:21,442 --> 00:07:22,672
Aw.
195
00:07:26,712 --> 00:07:28,152
Thank you for coming.
196
00:07:28,148 --> 00:07:30,378
My well-behaved husband,
Cleveland, and I
197
00:07:30,384 --> 00:07:32,124
appreciate your support.
198
00:07:32,119 --> 00:07:33,489
Hi, I'm Cleveland.
199
00:07:33,487 --> 00:07:34,887
I hope you had
a good last weekend,
200
00:07:34,888 --> 00:07:36,658
and I hope you have a
good weekend this weekend.
201
00:07:36,657 --> 00:07:38,617
Well, thank you
and thank you.
202
00:07:38,625 --> 00:07:39,885
Isn't he pleasant?
203
00:07:39,893 --> 00:07:41,493
Thank you for coming.
204
00:07:41,495 --> 00:07:43,495
My well-behaved husband,
Cleveland, and I
205
00:07:43,497 --> 00:07:44,897
appreciate your support.
206
00:07:44,898 --> 00:07:46,398
Hi, I'm Cleveland.
207
00:07:46,400 --> 00:07:47,400
Nice to meet you.
208
00:07:47,401 --> 00:07:48,931
Cleveland, is it?
209
00:07:48,936 --> 00:07:51,036
What an awesome name!
210
00:07:53,673 --> 00:07:55,413
What's going on, Donna?
211
00:07:55,409 --> 00:07:57,579
I demand an explanation!
212
00:07:57,578 --> 00:07:59,948
And some of those
small sandwiches!
213
00:07:59,947 --> 00:08:01,577
I never got to work my way
over there!
214
00:08:01,582 --> 00:08:03,322
Turkey!
215
00:08:03,317 --> 00:08:04,577
If they're out, roast beef!
216
00:08:04,585 --> 00:08:05,975
No tuna, obviously!
217
00:08:05,986 --> 00:08:07,516
It doesn't travel well!
218
00:08:07,521 --> 00:08:08,491
You know
what I like!
219
00:08:08,489 --> 00:08:09,649
I'm mad at you!
220
00:08:14,126 --> 00:08:15,286
Fell asleep.
221
00:08:15,295 --> 00:08:16,455
I was gonna do a whole
222
00:08:16,463 --> 00:08:18,433
"stewing husband
sitting in the dark" thing,
223
00:08:18,432 --> 00:08:20,672
but the old lids
got a little heavy.
224
00:08:20,667 --> 00:08:21,927
Can we try again?
225
00:08:21,935 --> 00:08:24,265
(sighs)
226
00:08:24,271 --> 00:08:26,001
(snoring)
227
00:08:26,006 --> 00:08:27,436
Well, well, well.
228
00:08:27,441 --> 00:08:29,941
How was the
candidates' dinner?
229
00:08:29,943 --> 00:08:31,683
Or should you be asking me,
230
00:08:31,678 --> 00:08:33,678
since I was the one
there with you?
231
00:08:33,680 --> 00:08:35,710
Cleveland, I'm sorry
you had to see that,
232
00:08:35,716 --> 00:08:38,946
and that security threw you
through your car windshield.
233
00:08:38,952 --> 00:08:40,492
That was from earlier
in the evening.
234
00:08:40,487 --> 00:08:42,647
I hit a rare eagle on the way
to the event.
235
00:08:42,656 --> 00:08:44,616
Who was that man, Donna?
236
00:08:44,625 --> 00:08:46,955
That was Ebert Williams,
the man I hired
237
00:08:46,960 --> 00:08:48,630
to be my campaign husband.
238
00:08:48,629 --> 00:08:50,399
I just can't risk
having you embarrass me
239
00:08:50,397 --> 00:08:51,457
before the election.
240
00:08:51,465 --> 00:08:52,695
So, there it is.
241
00:08:52,699 --> 00:08:54,969
Go on.
No, I'm done now.
242
00:08:54,968 --> 00:08:56,198
Oh, okay.
243
00:08:56,203 --> 00:08:57,473
So, there it is.
244
00:08:57,471 --> 00:08:59,501
(sobbing): How could
you replace me, Donna?
245
00:08:59,506 --> 00:09:00,466
How did you?
246
00:09:00,474 --> 00:09:01,544
Did you clone me?
247
00:09:01,542 --> 00:09:02,572
Did you use stem cells?
248
00:09:02,576 --> 00:09:03,476
What are stem cells?
249
00:09:03,477 --> 00:09:05,477
I'm against stem cells.
250
00:09:05,479 --> 00:09:07,249
Actually, your dad
recommended Ebert.
251
00:09:07,247 --> 00:09:08,847
He's been using him
for years.
252
00:09:08,849 --> 00:09:11,479
NARRATOR:
Welcome, Freight Train and Cleveland.
253
00:09:11,485 --> 00:09:13,985
You're team number one.
254
00:09:13,987 --> 00:09:18,357
Please accept this
traditional Croatian woman as your reward.
255
00:09:18,358 --> 00:09:20,588
(chuckling):
Man, we gonna bust her up.
256
00:09:20,594 --> 00:09:23,234
Cleveland, I'm sorry
if this hurts your feelings,
257
00:09:23,230 --> 00:09:26,830
but if I win, I'll be
only the 19th black woman
258
00:09:26,833 --> 00:09:28,503
to be on
the school board.
259
00:09:28,502 --> 00:09:30,502
We're talking
about history here.
260
00:09:30,504 --> 00:09:32,674
But what about my dignity?
261
00:09:32,673 --> 00:09:36,243
I want you to break up
with your fake husband!
262
00:09:36,243 --> 00:09:37,513
(sobbing)
263
00:09:37,511 --> 00:09:40,211
And you didn't bring me
any sandwiches.
264
00:09:40,213 --> 00:09:41,753
I did. Tuna.
265
00:09:41,748 --> 00:09:44,948
No! That's worse
than bringing nothing.
266
00:09:44,952 --> 00:09:46,752
(high-pitched voice):
You didn't listen.
267
00:09:54,527 --> 00:09:56,527
Ernie, could you
please walk faster?
268
00:09:56,530 --> 00:09:57,530
Nope.
269
00:09:57,531 --> 00:09:59,531
Osteoporosis.
270
00:09:59,533 --> 00:10:00,533
Let me tell
you something.
271
00:10:00,534 --> 00:10:02,534
Swim team's
had six practices,
272
00:10:02,536 --> 00:10:04,066
and you've missed
all of them.
273
00:10:04,071 --> 00:10:05,471
If you don't
want an incomplete,
274
00:10:05,472 --> 00:10:07,612
you will be at
that meet Saturday
275
00:10:07,608 --> 00:10:10,278
in your Speedo
and nothing else.
276
00:10:10,277 --> 00:10:13,307
Although, you'll want to wear
jeans or sweats to the match.
277
00:10:13,313 --> 00:10:16,553
But don't wear the same color
sweatshirt and sweatpants.
278
00:10:16,550 --> 00:10:18,750
It's just...
it's just not a good look.
279
00:10:18,752 --> 00:10:20,592
Okay. Bye.
280
00:10:20,587 --> 00:10:22,887
(humming)
281
00:10:24,323 --> 00:10:26,263
Junior, you love
them textbooks.
282
00:10:26,259 --> 00:10:27,729
It's over, Johnny!
283
00:10:27,728 --> 00:10:29,558
My academic career is over!
284
00:10:29,563 --> 00:10:31,563
I am a fat kid!
285
00:10:31,565 --> 00:10:33,825
And I cannot get up in front
of the entire school
286
00:10:33,834 --> 00:10:36,534
with Papa Smurf's hat
on my ding-dong!
287
00:10:38,104 --> 00:10:40,574
I'm not sure
you're thinking clearly.
288
00:10:40,574 --> 00:10:42,574
I've never
had more clarity.
289
00:10:42,576 --> 00:10:44,776
Goodbye,
Stoolbend High, forever.
290
00:10:44,778 --> 00:10:46,608
I'm off to my new life
291
00:10:46,613 --> 00:10:49,653
as either a plus-sized
hand model or a day laborer,
292
00:10:49,650 --> 00:10:51,780
whichever I
can find first.
293
00:10:51,785 --> 00:10:53,415
Good-bye, Ernie.
(cracking)
294
00:10:53,420 --> 00:10:55,020
Silly osteoporosis.
295
00:10:55,022 --> 00:10:56,662
And I'm only 17.
296
00:10:59,291 --> 00:11:01,131
So, Cleveland threw
a temper tantrum
297
00:11:01,128 --> 00:11:02,788
and wants me
to fire you.
298
00:11:02,796 --> 00:11:04,626
And maybe it's the
right thing to do.
299
00:11:04,631 --> 00:11:05,931
Doesn't matter to me.
300
00:11:05,932 --> 00:11:07,702
I clear 12K a year
being Cleveland
301
00:11:07,701 --> 00:11:08,701
for Freight Train.
302
00:11:08,702 --> 00:11:10,842
In fact, he's trying to
book me tomorrow
303
00:11:10,837 --> 00:11:13,097
so he can read me
a bedtime story.
304
00:11:13,106 --> 00:11:16,106
On the other hand,
the debate is tomorrow,
305
00:11:16,109 --> 00:11:18,609
and I just know that Cleveland
will show up in a pirate hat,
306
00:11:18,612 --> 00:11:20,452
making fart noises,
307
00:11:20,447 --> 00:11:22,707
wearing a T-shirt that says
"Master Debater."
308
00:11:22,716 --> 00:11:24,346
It's gonna cost you
either way, Donna,
309
00:11:24,351 --> 00:11:26,651
because I have a 24-hour
cancellation policy,
310
00:11:26,653 --> 00:11:29,353
and your insurance will
probably only cover half of it.
311
00:11:29,356 --> 00:11:30,986
Screw it. You're right.
312
00:11:30,991 --> 00:11:32,621
I've come too far.
313
00:11:32,626 --> 00:11:33,886
This is my time,
314
00:11:33,894 --> 00:11:35,834
and the school board
is just a steppingstone.
315
00:11:35,829 --> 00:11:38,529
Before you know it,
I'll be the port commissioner,
316
00:11:38,532 --> 00:11:40,172
then comptroller.
317
00:11:40,167 --> 00:11:42,397
And then, that's it.
318
00:11:42,402 --> 00:11:45,072
I'm telling Cleveland
you're not fired.
319
00:11:45,072 --> 00:11:47,672
Yeah, your last check bounced,
Donna.
320
00:11:47,674 --> 00:11:49,174
So it's cash from here on in.
321
00:11:49,176 --> 00:11:52,076
Thanks for coming
to Gustavo's, Donna.
322
00:11:52,079 --> 00:11:54,709
Welcome to the
Broken Stool, Donna.
323
00:11:54,715 --> 00:11:56,145
Sorry, Gus.
324
00:11:56,149 --> 00:11:57,719
No time for your weirdness.
325
00:11:57,718 --> 00:11:59,678
Make time!
Uh...
326
00:11:59,686 --> 00:12:01,686
Uh...
CLEVELAND: Donna!
327
00:12:01,688 --> 00:12:04,688
Oh, power lunching
at Gustavo's, huh?
328
00:12:04,691 --> 00:12:05,721
So did you do it?
329
00:12:05,726 --> 00:12:07,526
Did you talk
to your fake husband?
330
00:12:07,527 --> 00:12:08,827
Uh, yes.
331
00:12:08,829 --> 00:12:10,659
Yay! Our lives are reset.
332
00:12:10,664 --> 00:12:14,274
And I've decided he's gonna
stay on as my campaign husband.
333
00:12:14,267 --> 00:12:16,697
He projects the kind
of clean-cut, responsible,
334
00:12:16,703 --> 00:12:18,773
not gonna blow up his friends
335
00:12:18,772 --> 00:12:21,612
playing The Hurt Locker game
image I need to get elected.
336
00:12:21,608 --> 00:12:25,708
In my defense, we were
gonna play Human Centipede.
337
00:12:25,712 --> 00:12:28,682
It's not just The Hurt Lockergame, Cleveland.
338
00:12:28,682 --> 00:12:30,452
You cause a funeral
every week.
339
00:12:30,450 --> 00:12:32,680
Sometimes real,
sometimes fake.
340
00:12:32,686 --> 00:12:34,116
You're always wearing dresses.
341
00:12:34,121 --> 00:12:35,721
Or burkas.
342
00:12:35,722 --> 00:12:37,722
And look at yourself.
You're not even wearing pants.
343
00:12:37,724 --> 00:12:39,724
Holt is wearing
them as a shirt.
344
00:12:39,726 --> 00:12:41,556
Fits perfect, bro.
345
00:12:41,561 --> 00:12:43,701
That's funny, Donna.
346
00:12:43,697 --> 00:12:44,857
That's a grown little man
347
00:12:44,865 --> 00:12:46,695
with his head sticking
out of my zipper.
348
00:12:46,700 --> 00:12:48,570
Why are you not laughing?
349
00:12:48,568 --> 00:12:49,798
Cleveland, all I'm trying...
350
00:12:49,803 --> 00:12:51,573
What's happened
to you, Donna?
351
00:12:51,571 --> 00:12:53,711
When did you turn
into such a... this?
352
00:12:53,707 --> 00:12:57,707
You don't even laugh at
the E Trade baby anymore.
353
00:12:57,711 --> 00:12:58,881
You used to be fun!
354
00:12:58,879 --> 00:13:00,709
What happened to
Dynamite Donna?
355
00:13:00,714 --> 00:13:01,784
Remember her?
356
00:13:02,782 --> 00:13:05,152
Where's Dynamite Donna?
357
00:13:05,152 --> 00:13:07,422
♪
358
00:13:07,420 --> 00:13:09,750
♪
359
00:13:09,756 --> 00:13:12,916
I'm peeing!
360
00:13:12,926 --> 00:13:14,826
I remember that night.
361
00:13:14,828 --> 00:13:17,728
That was the first time I wore
Robert's pants on my head.
362
00:13:17,731 --> 00:13:19,061
(laughs)
363
00:13:19,065 --> 00:13:20,295
That's not funny.
364
00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:21,800
My lip!
365
00:13:21,802 --> 00:13:23,972
The point is,
you were awesome,
366
00:13:23,970 --> 00:13:26,810
and lately,
you're this stick in the mud.
367
00:13:26,807 --> 00:13:30,607
Because I'm a grownup now,
and I'm running for office.
368
00:13:30,610 --> 00:13:31,740
Well, good luck,
369
00:13:31,745 --> 00:13:33,745
'cause no one's gonna
vote for you.
370
00:13:33,747 --> 00:13:36,247
People want to vote for
someone they can have a beer with,
371
00:13:36,249 --> 00:13:39,579
and right now, I don't think
anyone in this bar
372
00:13:39,586 --> 00:13:40,846
would have a beer with you.
373
00:13:40,854 --> 00:13:42,094
That's not true.
374
00:13:43,422 --> 00:13:45,322
(gasps)
You're right.
375
00:13:45,325 --> 00:13:48,025
I guess it wouldn't hurt
to have just one.
376
00:13:48,028 --> 00:13:49,688
To Dynamite Donna.
377
00:13:49,696 --> 00:13:51,896
ALL:
To Dynamite Donna!
378
00:13:52,832 --> 00:13:54,472
(snoring)
379
00:13:54,467 --> 00:13:56,897
(cooing)
380
00:14:00,673 --> 00:14:02,313
(smacks lips)
381
00:14:02,309 --> 00:14:04,939
Well, there goes
my New Year's resolution.
382
00:14:04,945 --> 00:14:07,005
Blacked out on a Tuesday.
383
00:14:08,981 --> 00:14:12,951
Where in the world
is Timbear Sandiego?
384
00:14:12,953 --> 00:14:14,823
(snoring)
385
00:14:14,821 --> 00:14:17,221
Motor oil and Kellie Pickler?
386
00:14:17,224 --> 00:14:20,024
We must be at the Richmond
International Raceway!
387
00:14:22,962 --> 00:14:26,732
The debate's in an hour, and
we're four hours from home!
388
00:14:26,733 --> 00:14:28,373
Uh-oh!
389
00:14:34,473 --> 00:14:35,813
What happened last night?
390
00:14:35,809 --> 00:14:37,239
How did we even get here?
391
00:14:37,244 --> 00:14:40,554
And where did we get
all this money from?
392
00:14:40,547 --> 00:14:42,277
♪
393
00:14:50,923 --> 00:14:52,823
(cheering)
394
00:14:52,826 --> 00:14:54,886
DONNA:
I'm peeing!
395
00:14:56,095 --> 00:14:58,595
That explains
this scraped knee.
396
00:14:58,598 --> 00:15:01,598
So we drove to Richmond
blackout drunk?
397
00:15:01,601 --> 00:15:03,671
No, we Bugs Bunny'd
our way in.
398
00:15:04,870 --> 00:15:06,100
Cleveland, this is hopeless.
399
00:15:06,106 --> 00:15:07,936
I'll never make that debate.
400
00:15:07,941 --> 00:15:10,011
The election is
as good as lost.
401
00:15:10,010 --> 00:15:11,280
No, it's not.
402
00:15:11,278 --> 00:15:13,848
You just need a stupid,
irresponsible gesture.
403
00:15:13,847 --> 00:15:15,907
Let Cleveland be Cleveland.
404
00:15:19,118 --> 00:15:21,118
Caution! Caution!
405
00:15:21,121 --> 00:15:23,691
(tires squealing)
406
00:15:24,890 --> 00:15:27,090
(screams)
407
00:15:27,093 --> 00:15:28,893
Hey, what the heck
are you doing, buddy?
408
00:15:28,895 --> 00:15:30,255
You could get killed.
409
00:15:30,263 --> 00:15:31,863
My wife's running
for school board,
410
00:15:31,865 --> 00:15:33,595
and there's a debate
in an hour.
411
00:15:33,600 --> 00:15:35,130
Why didn't you say so?
412
00:15:35,135 --> 00:15:37,795
Nothing is more important
to NASCAR than education.
413
00:15:37,804 --> 00:15:38,904
(tires squeal)
414
00:15:38,905 --> 00:15:41,865
Tony Stewart! (whimpers)
415
00:15:41,875 --> 00:15:44,135
What's going on over there?
We're trying to have a race.
416
00:15:44,144 --> 00:15:46,614
This lady's gonna be late
for a school board debate.
417
00:15:46,613 --> 00:15:48,913
Guys, we got a school board
emergency.
418
00:15:48,915 --> 00:15:50,815
My mom was a member
of the school board.
419
00:15:50,817 --> 00:15:51,917
Her name is Tammy.
420
00:15:51,918 --> 00:15:53,788
All right,
I'll get you there, Tubbs.
421
00:15:53,787 --> 00:15:54,887
How'd you know my name?
422
00:15:54,888 --> 00:15:56,418
I didn't. Let's go.
423
00:15:56,423 --> 00:15:57,893
I'll get her there faster.
424
00:15:57,891 --> 00:15:58,891
Oh, you want to race?
425
00:15:58,892 --> 00:16:00,362
Climb in.
426
00:16:03,896 --> 00:16:04,996
BOTH:
Buckle up.
427
00:16:04,998 --> 00:16:08,428
Shift to D for drive, and...
428
00:16:08,435 --> 00:16:09,895
(tires squealing)
429
00:16:09,903 --> 00:16:12,503
Wait a minute,
with Dale and Tony gone
430
00:16:12,505 --> 00:16:14,065
and the rest
of the cars wrecked,
431
00:16:14,074 --> 00:16:16,984
I can win this thing
just by driving sensibly.
432
00:16:20,245 --> 00:16:21,975
Oh, nuts.
433
00:16:23,482 --> 00:16:27,922
Well, let's see if I can wrap
my fat hands around a hammer.
434
00:16:27,921 --> 00:16:30,021
(speaking Spanish)
435
00:16:40,966 --> 00:16:42,296
I'm kidding, man.
436
00:16:42,302 --> 00:16:43,942
Grab a hammer
and get to work.
437
00:16:43,937 --> 00:16:45,397
Gracias.
438
00:16:48,874 --> 00:16:50,944
This isn't half bad.
439
00:16:50,944 --> 00:16:52,014
Hot day, man.
440
00:16:52,012 --> 00:16:54,782
(high-pitched laughing)
441
00:16:54,781 --> 00:16:56,181
(gasps)
On, no!
442
00:16:56,182 --> 00:16:59,682
Really hot day.
443
00:16:59,686 --> 00:17:01,646
Oh, come on!
444
00:17:01,654 --> 00:17:04,024
Huh, that kid must have
body issues.
445
00:17:04,024 --> 00:17:05,994
Hey, don't worry.
446
00:17:05,992 --> 00:17:08,262
We're in shape
because we're so gay.
447
00:17:09,495 --> 00:17:11,525
Uh-oh.
448
00:17:11,531 --> 00:17:13,031
We're out of gas.
449
00:17:13,033 --> 00:17:15,003
(tires squealing)
450
00:17:15,001 --> 00:17:16,731
Where are the six guys?
451
00:17:16,736 --> 00:17:19,036
What?
I need tires and gas
452
00:17:19,039 --> 00:17:20,339
and I'm getting loose
in the corners.
453
00:17:20,340 --> 00:17:22,710
It's self-serve.
454
00:17:22,709 --> 00:17:24,339
(groans)
455
00:17:24,344 --> 00:17:25,984
All is lost.
456
00:17:25,979 --> 00:17:28,049
The hell it is!
457
00:17:32,051 --> 00:17:34,051
(tires squealing)
Go, go, go!
458
00:17:36,255 --> 00:17:38,255
Aah!
So which one of us won?
459
00:17:38,258 --> 00:17:40,488
I'll tell you who won:
the children of Stoolbend
460
00:17:40,493 --> 00:17:42,033
because there's nothing
more important
461
00:17:42,028 --> 00:17:43,258
than a public debate
about the issues
462
00:17:43,263 --> 00:17:45,663
confronting educators
in a shrinking economy.
463
00:17:45,665 --> 00:17:47,495
You want to do doughnuts
in the parking lot?
464
00:17:47,500 --> 00:17:49,030
No, I want to go read a book.
465
00:17:49,035 --> 00:17:51,935
Of course I want to do
doughnuts in the parking lot.
466
00:17:51,938 --> 00:17:54,508
(tires squealing, screaming)
467
00:17:54,507 --> 00:17:57,107
Oh, Cleveland,
what am I doing?
468
00:17:57,110 --> 00:17:59,510
I can't go up there
like this.
469
00:17:59,512 --> 00:18:02,082
You don't have to because
I'm going to do to you
470
00:18:02,082 --> 00:18:04,382
what I and cats have
been doing for years:
471
00:18:04,384 --> 00:18:06,484
a tongue bath.
472
00:18:10,589 --> 00:18:12,189
Thank you, Cleveland.
473
00:18:12,192 --> 00:18:13,292
What about you?
474
00:18:13,293 --> 00:18:16,363
There's no time, and I
have no more saliva.
475
00:18:16,362 --> 00:18:19,102
Besides, your husband's
already up there.
476
00:18:20,265 --> 00:18:22,795
And I want you to win.
477
00:18:22,802 --> 00:18:24,702
Oh, Cleveland.
478
00:18:24,704 --> 00:18:26,144
Go!
479
00:18:28,040 --> 00:18:29,770
We'll start with
opening statements.
480
00:18:29,776 --> 00:18:32,536
Ms. Tubbs?
481
00:18:32,545 --> 00:18:36,305
I'm so glad to be here
tonight with my...
482
00:18:36,316 --> 00:18:37,846
with my...
483
00:18:38,917 --> 00:18:41,617
...husband,
Cleveland Brown.
484
00:18:41,621 --> 00:18:43,321
Sit down, Ebes.
485
00:18:43,323 --> 00:18:46,123
That's my husband.
486
00:18:46,126 --> 00:18:47,086
(gasping)
487
00:18:47,093 --> 00:18:48,493
I got my spit back!
488
00:18:48,495 --> 00:18:50,225
(sighs)
Yes,
489
00:18:50,230 --> 00:18:52,800
my husband
embarrasses me sometimes,
490
00:18:52,799 --> 00:18:54,799
but who's never
been embarrassed?
491
00:18:55,434 --> 00:18:56,604
If people were scared
492
00:18:56,603 --> 00:18:58,073
of being embarrassed,
493
00:18:58,071 --> 00:18:59,601
we would have
no Adam Sandler movies
494
00:18:59,606 --> 00:19:01,436
or politicians.
495
00:19:01,441 --> 00:19:04,081
You think Newt Gingrich cares
that everybody knows
496
00:19:04,077 --> 00:19:06,077
he had two failed
open marriages?
497
00:19:06,079 --> 00:19:08,109
And do you think
his current wife cares
498
00:19:08,114 --> 00:19:10,114
that everyone knows
she's the whore
499
00:19:10,116 --> 00:19:12,076
who cheated with a married man
500
00:19:12,085 --> 00:19:14,845
while his wife
was battling M.S.?
501
00:19:14,854 --> 00:19:17,094
No, because it was fun.
502
00:19:17,090 --> 00:19:20,260
And so is my husband.
503
00:19:20,260 --> 00:19:22,830
I'm proud of him.
504
00:19:25,030 --> 00:19:28,130
And education can be fun, too.
505
00:19:28,134 --> 00:19:29,174
(cheering)
506
00:19:29,169 --> 00:19:31,599
Miss Donna was right.
507
00:19:31,604 --> 00:19:34,974
I've got nothing
to be embarrassed of.
508
00:19:34,974 --> 00:19:37,144
(sighs)
And that's my stepson,
509
00:19:37,143 --> 00:19:40,043
who never misses
a school board meeting.
510
00:19:40,046 --> 00:19:41,506
Send me the minutes.
511
00:19:53,125 --> 00:19:55,185
(cheering)
512
00:19:55,195 --> 00:19:57,125
(gasps)
513
00:19:57,130 --> 00:19:59,960
(squeaking)
514
00:20:12,978 --> 00:20:14,078
(phone rings)
515
00:20:14,080 --> 00:20:15,150
Yes?
516
00:20:15,148 --> 00:20:16,248
It's the results.
517
00:20:17,182 --> 00:20:18,222
I see.
518
00:20:18,218 --> 00:20:20,218
Yes, thank you.
519
00:20:20,220 --> 00:20:22,150
You lost by four votes.
520
00:20:22,155 --> 00:20:23,885
Oh, no.
521
00:20:23,890 --> 00:20:26,520
But the margin was
small enough
522
00:20:26,526 --> 00:20:29,656
that it triggered the state's
automatic recount provision!
523
00:20:29,662 --> 00:20:31,332
There will be a recount!
524
00:20:31,331 --> 00:20:33,431
NARRATOR: Next week,on The Cleveland Show...
525
00:20:33,433 --> 00:20:35,333
My mama's gonna win.
526
00:20:35,335 --> 00:20:37,235
You'll see. You'll all see!
527
00:20:38,237 --> 00:20:40,197
I want back in.
528
00:20:40,206 --> 00:20:41,236
(gasps)
529
00:20:41,241 --> 00:20:44,081
(moaning)
530
00:20:48,780 --> 00:20:52,120
Thank you.
The recount is in. You lost.
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NARRATOR:
Pretend you didn't seethat last clip
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and tune in next weekto find out
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what happenson The Cleveland Show.
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