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1
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- DIANA: Has anyone seen Easton?
- BRETT: He went out jogging.
2
00:00:03,120 --> 00:00:05,079
- He goes jogging?
- Yeah, through Margot's vines.
3
00:00:05,080 --> 00:00:06,199
Ew.
4
00:00:06,200 --> 00:00:08,359
- Welcome back, Chef.
- Shut up.
5
00:00:08,360 --> 00:00:09,919
A take on the mission's apple crumble,
6
00:00:09,920 --> 00:00:11,119
but with, like, a Nordic twist.
7
00:00:11,120 --> 00:00:13,319
The texture's like... phlegm.
8
00:00:13,320 --> 00:00:15,399
HARRY: Why didn't you tell me
that you and Kwame dated?
9
00:00:15,400 --> 00:00:18,079
The guest bedroom... maybe I could take it.
10
00:00:18,080 --> 00:00:20,399
- No, no! Denise!
- Brett, he's my brother.
11
00:00:20,400 --> 00:00:21,639
We have to kick him out of the nest.
12
00:00:21,640 --> 00:00:23,199
I'm going on a sex strike.
13
00:00:23,200 --> 00:00:26,239
These sacred privates are off limits.
14
00:00:26,240 --> 00:00:28,559
I'll hold out longer than you will.
15
00:00:28,560 --> 00:00:32,600
- Hello.
- Hello. I'm June, your mother.
16
00:00:37,880 --> 00:00:42,559
Well, see, it's not something
I'd usually go to a doctor for,
17
00:00:42,560 --> 00:00:45,239
but the bloody toenail
just got more and more infected.
18
00:00:45,240 --> 00:00:46,679
Oh, man!
19
00:00:46,680 --> 00:00:49,439
And I was prescribed...
Oh, what was it? It was...
20
00:00:49,440 --> 00:00:52,519
It started with an A.
It was an antibiotic. Um...
21
00:00:52,520 --> 00:00:54,039
(STUTTERS)
22
00:00:54,040 --> 00:00:55,919
Axolotl? (LAUGHS)
23
00:00:55,920 --> 00:00:58,839
Anyway, whatever it was,
24
00:00:58,840 --> 00:01:02,079
I had to have three courses of it
to get rid of it.
25
00:01:02,080 --> 00:01:04,719
But, oh, thankfully, it's mostly gone now.
26
00:01:04,720 --> 00:01:05,959
That's a relief.
27
00:01:05,960 --> 00:01:08,879
I didn't want to pay $500
to some foot doctor
28
00:01:08,880 --> 00:01:10,359
or whatever they're called.
29
00:01:10,360 --> 00:01:12,079
- Podiatrist.
- A podiatrist.
30
00:01:12,080 --> 00:01:13,719
I have no health insurance.
31
00:01:13,720 --> 00:01:15,639
I've never been to a podiatrist.
32
00:01:15,640 --> 00:01:19,199
I haven't either. Have you, Harry?
33
00:01:19,200 --> 00:01:22,279
Me? Um, my uncle is one.
34
00:01:22,280 --> 00:01:24,840
Oh! That's lucky, isn't it? (CHUCKLES)
35
00:01:26,120 --> 00:01:27,479
Cool.
36
00:01:27,480 --> 00:01:30,399
So, was abandoning your children worth it?
37
00:01:30,400 --> 00:01:31,999
- (BURPS)
- Diana.
38
00:01:32,000 --> 00:01:35,359
What? I'm sorry, but your mother,
who walked out on you,
39
00:01:35,360 --> 00:01:36,999
comes back 40 years later
40
00:01:37,000 --> 00:01:39,199
and starts telling you about
her infected toe
41
00:01:39,200 --> 00:01:41,279
and you're all just like, "Oh!"
42
00:01:41,280 --> 00:01:43,639
- Yes, yes, I was getting to it.
- Were you, though?
43
00:01:43,640 --> 00:01:48,839
(CHUCKLES) She's a real firecracker.
You remind me of myself at your age.
44
00:01:48,840 --> 00:01:52,079
OK, so, we...
45
00:01:52,080 --> 00:01:54,600
We would like to know...
What are you doing here?
46
00:01:58,640 --> 00:02:00,200
Um...
47
00:02:02,760 --> 00:02:06,599
Ooh, bit hot today, eh?
Be good to get some rain.
48
00:02:06,600 --> 00:02:08,199
Are we expecting any?
49
00:02:08,200 --> 00:02:09,959
Actually, let me check.
50
00:02:09,960 --> 00:02:14,519
- I'm sorry, is this a bad time?
- It's, um... It's a long time.
51
00:02:14,520 --> 00:02:16,159
Ah, rain on Thursday.
52
00:02:16,160 --> 00:02:20,159
- Ooh, wait, that's Queensland.
- Yes, it is.
53
00:02:20,160 --> 00:02:24,439
But, you know, I just thought,
since Jim had passed...
54
00:02:24,440 --> 00:02:26,679
I just wanted to see you again.
55
00:02:26,680 --> 00:02:29,399
- Better late than never, I guess.
- Exactly. (CHUCKLES)
56
00:02:29,400 --> 00:02:32,999
I'm sure you understand
that we are curious about
57
00:02:33,000 --> 00:02:36,119
where you've been for the past 40 years.
58
00:02:36,120 --> 00:02:38,719
Well, yes, of course.
59
00:02:38,720 --> 00:02:40,399
It's all a bit drab, though, really.
60
00:02:40,400 --> 00:02:44,799
- (PHONE VIBRATES)
- So, it was London in the late '70s.
61
00:02:44,800 --> 00:02:49,759
Oh, and I did the Hindu Kush.
That was truly transformative.
62
00:02:49,760 --> 00:02:53,439
Met this German man
who started his own commune.
63
00:02:53,440 --> 00:02:57,399
It was interesting, but, oh,
the Europeans, they're a bit handsy.
64
00:02:57,400 --> 00:02:59,159
Women now would be up in arms about it,
65
00:02:59,160 --> 00:03:02,519
but at the time,
we just shrugged it off, you know,
66
00:03:02,520 --> 00:03:06,559
as a bit of unwanted fingering
and got on with it. (CHUCKLES)
67
00:03:06,560 --> 00:03:11,799
But, you know, the last few years,
I've just been travelling in my van.
68
00:03:11,800 --> 00:03:15,280
So, what have you all been up to?
69
00:03:16,799 --> 00:03:20,758
- Are you serious?
- Far out. It's minus 47 in Russia.
70
00:03:20,760 --> 00:03:24,639
- What have we been up to? Seriously?
- A mother can't be curious?
71
00:03:24,640 --> 00:03:28,479
It's just been such a long time.
It doesn't make sense.
72
00:03:28,480 --> 00:03:29,799
Well, of course it doesn't make sense.
73
00:03:29,800 --> 00:03:32,119
I'm a world-famous chef
and I find it very hard to believe
74
00:03:32,120 --> 00:03:33,679
that you haven't seen my face anywhere,
75
00:03:33,680 --> 00:03:37,159
because there was a time
when my face was everywhere!
76
00:03:37,160 --> 00:03:39,839
Ooh, that's lovely.
Did you make this risotto?
77
00:03:39,840 --> 00:03:41,119
(CHUCKLES)
78
00:03:41,120 --> 00:03:43,319
The risotto that looks like
afterbirth and tastes like ash?
79
00:03:43,320 --> 00:03:44,919
No, I didn't... I didn't make this risotto.
80
00:03:44,920 --> 00:03:46,119
Oh, easy!
81
00:03:46,120 --> 00:03:48,639
- Yeah, real nice, dude.
- Denise likes it smoky.
82
00:03:48,640 --> 00:03:50,879
Yes, I do. It's... it's delicious.
83
00:03:50,880 --> 00:03:54,440
- Mm. So do I.
- Aw, thanks. Harry helped.
84
00:03:55,440 --> 00:03:58,879
- Oh, are you a chef too, Harry?
- Me? No, I'm a restaurateur.
85
00:03:58,880 --> 00:04:00,138
None of them are chefs.
86
00:04:01,640 --> 00:04:04,359
Well, Diana's a pastry chef,
but I'm the only famous...
87
00:04:04,360 --> 00:04:05,919
Oh, I love pastries.
88
00:04:05,920 --> 00:04:07,999
You do? That's so great to hear.
89
00:04:08,000 --> 00:04:11,319
Actually, some of Diana's desserts
are based on your recipes.
90
00:04:11,320 --> 00:04:13,799
- No. No, I never cooked.
- I know. I know.
91
00:04:13,800 --> 00:04:17,599
It turns out the dead grandma inspo
was just a whole bunch of BS.
92
00:04:17,600 --> 00:04:19,279
Wasn't it?
93
00:04:19,280 --> 00:04:21,279
But, hey, if you want to make up for it
94
00:04:21,280 --> 00:04:23,719
and come up with
some sweet Nordic shit for me,
95
00:04:23,720 --> 00:04:24,799
then feel free.
96
00:04:24,800 --> 00:04:26,519
I thought you said the menu was done.
97
00:04:26,520 --> 00:04:28,879
So, where would I know you from?
98
00:04:28,880 --> 00:04:30,799
Can you believe this?
99
00:04:30,800 --> 00:04:33,639
Not everybody watches cooking shows, Easton.
100
00:04:33,640 --> 00:04:36,399
Easton? So, you've changed it from Jimmy?
101
00:04:36,400 --> 00:04:37,519
I told him.
102
00:04:37,520 --> 00:04:41,999
I wanted to call you Edgar,
but, no, his father was Jim,
103
00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:44,559
he was a Jim, and he wanted you to be a Jim.
104
00:04:44,560 --> 00:04:48,079
That'd be like me naming you June Jr.
105
00:04:48,080 --> 00:04:50,039
(LAUGHTER)
106
00:04:50,040 --> 00:04:51,799
Easton West?
107
00:04:51,800 --> 00:04:56,039
And your business partner...
that's Left on Right, is it?
108
00:04:56,040 --> 00:04:58,519
(LAUGHTER)
109
00:04:58,520 --> 00:04:59,880
That's enough!
110
00:05:00,960 --> 00:05:03,839
Oh, I apologise. I...
111
00:05:03,840 --> 00:05:06,519
I didn't mean to tread on a nerve.
112
00:05:06,520 --> 00:05:09,800
To be honest, I... I quite like the name.
113
00:05:11,360 --> 00:05:15,479
So, what's the situation here?
You don't all live together?
114
00:05:15,480 --> 00:05:17,879
No, Harry and I live in London, actually.
115
00:05:17,880 --> 00:05:19,399
- Oh, do you?
- Yeah.
116
00:05:19,400 --> 00:05:20,719
Well, it's still a bit strange...
117
00:05:20,720 --> 00:05:23,519
I mean, a married couple
living with a grown man.
118
00:05:23,520 --> 00:05:25,759
Well, they're not married.
And why is it strange?
119
00:05:25,760 --> 00:05:26,920
I mean, we're a family. We love...
120
00:05:28,360 --> 00:05:31,000
- We like each other, don't we?
- Yeah.
121
00:05:32,800 --> 00:05:38,799
Anyway, we... Harry and I,
have to go and check on the mains.
122
00:05:38,800 --> 00:05:42,639
- Yeah. Yeah, we do.
- Um, isn't risotto a main?
123
00:05:42,640 --> 00:05:45,719
Yeah, this risotto was an entree.
The mains are on their way.
124
00:05:45,720 --> 00:05:47,000
Come on.
125
00:05:51,160 --> 00:05:56,839
I know this has been a shock,
but why all the hostility?
126
00:05:56,840 --> 00:05:57,919
(PHONE VIBRATES)
127
00:05:57,920 --> 00:06:00,559
DENISE: There was a grave out there
with your name on it.
128
00:06:00,560 --> 00:06:02,239
That's where we believed you were for years.
129
00:06:02,240 --> 00:06:03,279
(WHISPERS) Shit!
130
00:06:03,280 --> 00:06:07,399
That is weird, I agree,
but I didn't come up with that.
131
00:06:07,400 --> 00:06:09,639
So, for you to just reappear like this
132
00:06:09,640 --> 00:06:11,119
out of the blue, it's, um...
133
00:06:11,120 --> 00:06:13,320
Yes, it is.
134
00:06:16,240 --> 00:06:18,319
What... what was she saying?
135
00:06:18,320 --> 00:06:19,879
BRETT: Sorry.
136
00:06:19,880 --> 00:06:22,199
The only other excuse I had
was going to the toilet,
137
00:06:22,200 --> 00:06:23,919
but it'd be a bit weird if we went together.
138
00:06:23,920 --> 00:06:25,919
It's fine. I'd rather be in here
than out there
139
00:06:25,920 --> 00:06:27,479
trying to keep up to speed with everything.
140
00:06:27,480 --> 00:06:30,679
- Is there another pantry?
- No. One toilet, one pantry.
141
00:06:30,680 --> 00:06:32,039
All I can say, Harry,
142
00:06:32,040 --> 00:06:34,639
is that there are several elephants
in that room.
143
00:06:34,640 --> 00:06:36,679
Go figure. Hey, what's with all the pears?
144
00:06:36,680 --> 00:06:38,479
Oh, yeah, online shop fail.
145
00:06:38,480 --> 00:06:41,239
I meant to buy 10, but I bought 10 punnets.
146
00:06:41,240 --> 00:06:45,839
But the most awkward elephant for me
is the Easton-living-here elephant.
147
00:06:45,840 --> 00:06:47,519
- DIANA: Hi!
- Ooh.
148
00:06:47,520 --> 00:06:50,600
- Do you need a hand?
- No, we're good.
149
00:06:54,240 --> 00:06:55,280
OK.
150
00:06:59,160 --> 00:07:02,399
Wait a sec. Her bed breadcrumbs.
151
00:07:02,400 --> 00:07:04,600
Might have expired.
I got them a year ago, but...
152
00:07:08,000 --> 00:07:10,279
Ooh! (WHISPERS) Yes.
153
00:07:10,280 --> 00:07:12,919
- One month to go.
- OK.
154
00:07:12,920 --> 00:07:16,519
So, an egg, sardines,
155
00:07:16,520 --> 00:07:19,080
crap load of breadcrumbs, 500 pears.
156
00:07:56,880 --> 00:07:59,239
JUNE: I know it mustn't have been easy
157
00:07:59,240 --> 00:08:01,319
for you as children,
158
00:08:01,320 --> 00:08:04,639
but I suppose I thought
you might have gotten over it.
159
00:08:04,640 --> 00:08:06,719
(SCOFFS) OK. She's a deranged psychopath.
160
00:08:06,720 --> 00:08:09,079
Is that any way to speak to your mum?
161
00:08:09,080 --> 00:08:11,599
Oh, don't worry.
That's how he speaks to everyone.
162
00:08:11,600 --> 00:08:14,079
Mum? Mum?!
163
00:08:14,080 --> 00:08:15,279
If you were a decent mum,
164
00:08:15,280 --> 00:08:18,679
you would have followed my career
and... watched my TV shows.
165
00:08:18,680 --> 00:08:20,000
And...
166
00:08:21,440 --> 00:08:23,039
...not walk out on you guys.
167
00:08:23,040 --> 00:08:25,879
Yeah, that's... on the list.
168
00:08:25,880 --> 00:08:28,679
I went to the school formal
with my dress inside out.
169
00:08:28,680 --> 00:08:32,319
I bought my first bra by myself.
170
00:08:32,320 --> 00:08:35,559
You don't even want to know
how my dad explained my period.
171
00:08:35,560 --> 00:08:38,559
I was so miserable for so long.
172
00:08:38,560 --> 00:08:41,399
Oh, you were the bubbliest baby.
173
00:08:41,400 --> 00:08:44,279
Everybody used to say
what a happy baby you were.
174
00:08:44,280 --> 00:08:46,599
- I was?
- Yes.
175
00:08:46,600 --> 00:08:50,559
- I didn't even know that.
- Yes, you had a big grin, rosy cheeks.
176
00:08:50,560 --> 00:08:54,279
Was I a... bubbly baby?
177
00:08:54,280 --> 00:08:58,079
I... actually can't remember.
178
00:08:58,080 --> 00:09:01,239
How can a mother walk out
on bubbly babies, then?
179
00:09:01,240 --> 00:09:04,240
BRETT: Mm! Here we go!
Hope you left some room.
180
00:09:06,320 --> 00:09:09,039
HARRY: Careful, they're still hot.
Everyone's a winner.
181
00:09:09,040 --> 00:09:13,119
- It's Brett's degustation.
- Oh, it's not that bad.
182
00:09:13,120 --> 00:09:16,079
- Crumbed sardines, Sicilian style.
- Oh, no, I'm sorry.
183
00:09:16,080 --> 00:09:19,639
I've been a plant-based woman
for over 30 years now.
184
00:09:19,640 --> 00:09:22,079
- (PHONE VIBRATES)
- I mean, before it was a hip fad.
185
00:09:22,080 --> 00:09:24,719
No worries. More for me. Molto Benito.
186
00:09:24,720 --> 00:09:29,440
(CHUCKLES) Oh, my goodness! Jim's garage.
187
00:09:30,406 --> 00:09:32,439
I hated it at the time,
188
00:09:32,440 --> 00:09:35,639
but I actually missed
the smell of grease and motor oil.
189
00:09:35,640 --> 00:09:37,319
Well, I'll happily point you
in the direction
190
00:09:37,320 --> 00:09:38,559
of the nearest petrol station.
191
00:09:38,560 --> 00:09:41,159
Dude! I've got to have a piddle.
192
00:09:41,160 --> 00:09:45,319
- It's been awhile between pit stops.
- You ARE coming back, I take it?
193
00:09:45,320 --> 00:09:49,140
- (CHUCKLES) There's that West humour.
- Middle door to the right!
194
00:09:50,680 --> 00:09:52,599
- OK, I've had enough.
- Don't you want answers?
195
00:09:52,600 --> 00:09:53,999
Well, yes, but unless the question is,
196
00:09:54,000 --> 00:09:56,479
"Who's the shit test mum in history?"
we're not getting any.
197
00:09:56,480 --> 00:09:57,720
(PHONE VIBRATES)
198
00:10:02,312 --> 00:10:04,912
OK, just get rid of her, or I'm out.
199
00:10:07,840 --> 00:10:10,279
(SOFTLY) Psst! Psst! Easton, out?
200
00:10:10,280 --> 00:10:11,760
Just...
201
00:10:13,000 --> 00:10:16,240
- Are you still chewing?
- Brettalisimo.
202
00:10:18,840 --> 00:10:20,000
Mm.
203
00:10:27,800 --> 00:10:29,240
Alright.
204
00:10:48,240 --> 00:10:49,760
(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS)
205
00:10:51,040 --> 00:10:52,320
OK.
206
00:10:59,760 --> 00:11:01,200
(SIGHS)
207
00:11:04,000 --> 00:11:05,840
(PHONE VIBRATES)
208
00:11:08,760 --> 00:11:10,160
Lower?
209
00:11:12,880 --> 00:11:14,759
- Lower.
- (PHONE SNAPS SHUT)
210
00:11:14,760 --> 00:11:16,999
Maybe I should be the one to speak to her
211
00:11:17,000 --> 00:11:19,479
'cause, quite often,
people tell their grandkids shit
212
00:11:19,480 --> 00:11:21,239
that they'd never tell
their own kids, you know?
213
00:11:21,240 --> 00:11:26,159
Ah, that's better.
Ooh, can you smell something?
214
00:11:26,160 --> 00:11:27,719
No. That's enough.
215
00:11:27,720 --> 00:11:29,839
You will sit down
and stop avoiding questions.
216
00:11:29,840 --> 00:11:32,039
No, I can smell something too.
217
00:11:32,040 --> 00:11:34,519
(ALL SNIFF)
218
00:11:34,520 --> 00:11:36,959
- What is that?
- The crumbed pears!
219
00:11:36,960 --> 00:11:39,160
- HARRY: Shit!
- (SMOKE DETECTOR BEEPS)
220
00:11:41,240 --> 00:11:44,199
Oh, shit! The door's closed!
221
00:11:44,200 --> 00:11:45,599
(SCREAMS)
222
00:11:45,600 --> 00:11:47,080
Brett! Brett!
223
00:11:55,680 --> 00:11:57,319
Whoops.
224
00:11:57,320 --> 00:11:58,799
Just...
225
00:11:58,800 --> 00:12:02,000
Just leave it, Brett. Just leave it.
226
00:12:03,120 --> 00:12:04,120
(GASPS)
227
00:12:09,320 --> 00:12:13,319
Believe it or not, this is all
pretty standard behaviour.
228
00:12:13,320 --> 00:12:16,600
No wonder you moved to London. Hmm?
229
00:12:22,360 --> 00:12:23,600
Oh!
230
00:12:27,400 --> 00:12:28,600
Whoops.
231
00:12:31,120 --> 00:12:33,560
- (SIGHS) That Jim.
- (CHUCKLES)
232
00:12:36,360 --> 00:12:38,879
Strange man.
233
00:12:38,880 --> 00:12:43,439
I know relationships die,
but to kill me as well and...
234
00:12:43,440 --> 00:12:47,279
You were only children and it was so cruel.
235
00:12:47,280 --> 00:12:51,239
Hold on, Dad was the cruel one?
236
00:12:51,240 --> 00:12:54,499
He told you I was dead
and dug a grave. That's sick!
237
00:12:54,555 --> 00:12:58,879
He may not have been the best,
or even an adequate dad,
238
00:12:58,880 --> 00:13:00,639
but at least he was here for us.
239
00:13:00,640 --> 00:13:03,239
I wanted to return.
240
00:13:03,240 --> 00:13:06,159
Several times, I tried to contact you.
241
00:13:06,160 --> 00:13:07,799
He said I was never welcome back.
242
00:13:07,800 --> 00:13:09,439
I don't believe a single word
243
00:13:09,440 --> 00:13:11,439
that comes out of your batty old mouth.
244
00:13:11,440 --> 00:13:13,839
BRETT: Okey-do key, no more smoky.
245
00:13:13,840 --> 00:13:16,439
The house smells like burnt pear and toast,
246
00:13:16,440 --> 00:13:18,040
but, otherwise, all good.
247
00:13:20,800 --> 00:13:24,719
So, what did you expect exactly,
turning up after all this time?
248
00:13:24,720 --> 00:13:27,359
Well, I suppose I thought, after so long,
249
00:13:27,360 --> 00:13:29,519
everything would be fine,
but obviously it's not.
250
00:13:29,520 --> 00:13:31,119
I mean, there are misunderstandings.
251
00:13:31,120 --> 00:13:34,119
No, no, there's no misunderstandings
and it's not all fine,
252
00:13:34,120 --> 00:13:38,439
so just... just get back in your van
and get your tush back to the Kush
253
00:13:38,440 --> 00:13:39,719
and leave us the hell alone.
254
00:13:39,720 --> 00:13:41,600
But they're not lies.
255
00:13:43,280 --> 00:13:46,840
If you don't believe me,
why not ask Jim yourself?
256
00:13:49,480 --> 00:13:50,720
What?!
257
00:13:55,600 --> 00:13:56,999
Are we seriously doing this?
258
00:13:57,000 --> 00:13:59,679
Yes, we are. Mum.
259
00:13:59,680 --> 00:14:01,719
Pop would have found it hilarious.
260
00:14:01,720 --> 00:14:03,559
Jim could barely communicate
when he was alive.
261
00:14:03,560 --> 00:14:05,959
Good luck getting dead Jim
to make any sense.
262
00:14:05,960 --> 00:14:08,199
Is widdle We as ton scared of some ghosts?
263
00:14:08,200 --> 00:14:11,319
What? No. I am a bit.
264
00:14:11,320 --> 00:14:15,079
I can't reach him
unless all our souls are united.
265
00:14:15,080 --> 00:14:16,399
Oh, well, don't worry about it, then,
266
00:14:16,400 --> 00:14:18,519
'cause Easton sold his ages ago.
267
00:14:18,520 --> 00:14:21,359
I feel a bit weird. I didn't even know him.
268
00:14:21,360 --> 00:14:23,080
Nobody did. Come on.
269
00:14:28,800 --> 00:14:31,319
- (SHOUTS) Jim West...
- ALL: Arrgh! ..are you with us?
270
00:14:31,320 --> 00:14:32,759
Oh, gee, that was a bit loud.
271
00:14:32,760 --> 00:14:38,799
Jim West, we wish to communicate with you.
272
00:14:38,800 --> 00:14:40,679
Can you join us?
273
00:14:40,680 --> 00:14:42,279
He's probably passed out drunk.
274
00:14:42,280 --> 00:14:46,760
I can feel you, Jim.
I can feel your presence.
275
00:14:50,160 --> 00:14:54,119
- Oh! Who... who's doing that?
- She is.
276
00:14:54,120 --> 00:14:56,719
Jim, are you here?
277
00:14:56,720 --> 00:14:59,800
Jim, it's me, June.
278
00:15:04,080 --> 00:15:06,399
- Holy...!
- Speak to us, Jim.
279
00:15:06,400 --> 00:15:08,200
Are you OK?
280
00:15:11,160 --> 00:15:12,920
Oh!
281
00:15:14,920 --> 00:15:17,039
Oh! Thought that was going to be 'no'.
282
00:15:17,040 --> 00:15:21,839
Did you forbid me,
the mother of your children,
283
00:15:21,840 --> 00:15:23,160
from coming home?
284
00:15:26,040 --> 00:15:27,040
S.
285
00:15:29,360 --> 00:15:32,599
O. 'So'. So what?
286
00:15:32,600 --> 00:15:34,320
I'm not sure.
287
00:15:37,200 --> 00:15:38,520
D.
288
00:15:40,280 --> 00:15:43,119
O. 'Sodo'.
289
00:15:43,120 --> 00:15:44,359
'So, do...'
290
00:15:44,360 --> 00:15:47,399
So, do... we all think this is bullshit yet?
291
00:15:47,400 --> 00:15:50,160
Well, he's still going.
292
00:15:53,120 --> 00:15:54,240
F.
293
00:15:57,120 --> 00:15:58,240
Double F.
294
00:15:59,360 --> 00:16:01,239
'Sodoff'.
295
00:16:01,240 --> 00:16:02,920
(WHISPERS) 'Sod off'.
296
00:16:07,160 --> 00:16:09,799
- 'Sod off'?
- Oh, my God!
297
00:16:10,401 --> 00:16:11,680
- (LOUD BANG)
- (SCREAMS)
298
00:16:11,682 --> 00:16:13,319
- (ALL SCREAM)
- Oh, Brett! Brett!
299
00:16:13,320 --> 00:16:15,399
Sorry. I was just scared with what Jim did.
300
00:16:15,400 --> 00:16:17,079
It wasn't Jim. This woman is nuts.
301
00:16:17,080 --> 00:16:18,999
And you're all pathetic
for going along with it.
302
00:16:19,000 --> 00:16:21,239
Pardon? We are pathetic? OK.
303
00:16:21,240 --> 00:16:23,239
Says the grown man who chucks a tanty
304
00:16:23,240 --> 00:16:24,759
when someone doesn't know who he is.
305
00:16:24,760 --> 00:16:26,599
(ENGLISH ACCENT) Oh, pardon? Oh, tanty?
306
00:16:26,600 --> 00:16:28,359
You know, this whole refined,
grown-up shtick
307
00:16:28,360 --> 00:16:30,919
just makes you seem even more juvenile.
308
00:16:30,920 --> 00:16:32,719
I'm sorry. Diana juvenile?
309
00:16:32,720 --> 00:16:34,497
- That's a bit rich coming from you.
- Oh, what?
310
00:16:34,499 --> 00:16:36,479
'Cause I'm not anally retentive
and iron my towels?
311
00:16:36,480 --> 00:16:38,599
You don't even wash your own towels!
312
00:16:38,600 --> 00:16:40,919
Here I am trying to live a normal life
313
00:16:40,920 --> 00:16:44,199
in a normal partnership
without having to put up with...
314
00:16:44,200 --> 00:16:46,879
With... with... with what? Me? It's MY room!
315
00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:50,159
It's OUR house! Are you a teenager?
316
00:16:50,160 --> 00:16:53,039
- I haven't done anything bad in ages!
- Oh, yeah, you're right.
317
00:16:53,040 --> 00:16:55,559
It's been ages since you publicly shamed me,
318
00:16:55,560 --> 00:16:57,839
which you still haven't
apologised for, by the way.
319
00:16:57,840 --> 00:17:00,319
Can you just take responsibility
for something in your life?
320
00:17:00,320 --> 00:17:03,519
Oh, that's rich coming from somebody
who hightailed it off to London
321
00:17:03,520 --> 00:17:04,959
without saying goodbye to anyone.
322
00:17:04,960 --> 00:17:07,119
I didn't even WANT to go to
bullshit London in the first place.
323
00:17:07,120 --> 00:17:10,079
I was quite happy here.
I had friends and a life.
324
00:17:10,080 --> 00:17:12,439
You all drove me away!
325
00:17:12,440 --> 00:17:14,839
Wow. Good to know.
326
00:17:14,840 --> 00:17:16,999
Oh, no, Harry, I didn't mean...
327
00:17:17,000 --> 00:17:18,079
- Jim!
- (ALL SCREAM)
328
00:17:18,080 --> 00:17:19,080
Will you stop doing that?
329
00:17:19,081 --> 00:17:22,159
He's still lingering.
I should probably do a cleanse.
330
00:17:22,160 --> 00:17:25,079
You know, exorcise any negative spirits.
331
00:17:25,080 --> 00:17:26,279
I'll smudge.
332
00:17:26,280 --> 00:17:29,080
Oh, probably a good idea. Smudge, smudge.
333
00:17:30,920 --> 00:17:33,679
Oh, my gosh.
334
00:17:33,680 --> 00:17:35,879
- (DOOR CLOSES)
- OK, she has got to go.
335
00:17:35,880 --> 00:17:37,559
- Can you calm down?
- No!
336
00:17:37,560 --> 00:17:39,159
No. I'm not even convinced it's Mum.
337
00:17:39,160 --> 00:17:41,039
I mean, since when was she into
all this voodoo stuff?
338
00:17:41,040 --> 00:17:42,519
And Mum was never that short!
339
00:17:42,520 --> 00:17:44,159
Yeah, well, it has been several decades.
340
00:17:44,160 --> 00:17:46,359
- I knew that wedding dress was juju.
- Bad.
341
00:17:46,360 --> 00:17:47,679
Just think about it, Denise.
342
00:17:47,680 --> 00:17:49,039
Nothing that she has said has indicated
343
00:17:49,040 --> 00:17:50,399
she knows anything about us.
344
00:17:50,400 --> 00:17:53,639
I mean, she might have read an obituary
or an article about me.
345
00:17:53,640 --> 00:17:56,399
We have a restaurant right here
that was called Jim's.
346
00:17:56,400 --> 00:17:57,639
DIANA: OK. OK.
347
00:17:57,640 --> 00:18:00,239
Is there a way if we can find out
if it's definitely her or not?
348
00:18:00,240 --> 00:18:02,599
Yeah, we just need to prove that
she's a fraud, so we can report her
349
00:18:02,600 --> 00:18:06,479
so she doesn't prey on any other
emotionally disturbed family.
350
00:18:06,480 --> 00:18:08,759
OK, good. You've admitted
you're emotionally disturbed.
351
00:18:08,760 --> 00:18:10,639
That's good. Mum?
352
00:18:10,640 --> 00:18:12,799
Fine! Fine. OK, let's get some proof.
353
00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:14,559
Great. Great. Brett, you can distract her.
354
00:18:14,560 --> 00:18:15,759
Me? Why?
355
00:18:15,760 --> 00:18:18,679
Denise and I, we can search through
the old boxes of Jim's crap
356
00:18:18,680 --> 00:18:20,959
and see if there's any photographs
of her that he didn't throw out.
357
00:18:20,960 --> 00:18:23,759
And, Diana,
you search her van... for anything.
358
00:18:23,760 --> 00:18:25,280
OK, yeah.
359
00:18:26,600 --> 00:18:29,759
Harry, will you come with me?
360
00:18:29,760 --> 00:18:32,679
Oh, no, Harry and I,
we'll do the distracting.
361
00:18:32,680 --> 00:18:34,680
- Just... we're the A-Team.
- Brett.
362
00:18:39,040 --> 00:18:40,480
We're the A-Team, Harry.
363
00:18:42,040 --> 00:18:44,160
OK. OK.
364
00:18:46,600 --> 00:18:47,840
Distraction.
365
00:18:51,800 --> 00:18:53,239
I've gone through these before.
366
00:18:53,240 --> 00:18:55,959
They're mostly Dad
next to animals he's shot.
367
00:18:55,960 --> 00:18:57,479
Yeah, well, we need to look again.
368
00:18:57,480 --> 00:18:58,919
I know they're old, but if she's there,
369
00:18:58,920 --> 00:19:00,160
there'll be some resemblance.
370
00:19:02,120 --> 00:19:03,639
Hey, I thought we were getting along.
371
00:19:03,640 --> 00:19:06,079
You know, I know I don't clean or pay rent
372
00:19:06,080 --> 00:19:07,599
or contribute in any way at all,
373
00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:10,639
but... I didn't realise
you wanted me to leave.
374
00:19:10,640 --> 00:19:12,359
Don't you want your own space?
375
00:19:12,360 --> 00:19:13,999
- (PHONE VIBRATES)
- And life?
376
00:19:14,000 --> 00:19:15,959
Get back in the game?
377
00:19:15,960 --> 00:19:19,320
I mean, it must feel strange,
brooding alone in that room.
378
00:19:22,320 --> 00:19:25,400
I need... the toilet.
379
00:19:34,920 --> 00:19:36,399
- I can help you with that!
- Arrgh!
380
00:19:36,400 --> 00:19:38,719
Sorry! I didn't mean to scare you.
381
00:19:38,720 --> 00:19:40,719
I just thought,
382
00:19:40,720 --> 00:19:43,759
before we get back into Jim's spirit,
383
00:19:43,760 --> 00:19:47,519
maybe I could show you
the... irrigation system.
384
00:19:47,520 --> 00:19:49,399
Oh. Why?
385
00:19:49,400 --> 00:19:52,640
You know, show you
what we've done with the place.
386
00:19:53,720 --> 00:19:56,159
Well, I guess I'd be a fool
387
00:19:56,160 --> 00:19:59,079
to turn down an invitation
from such a handsome man.
388
00:19:59,080 --> 00:20:01,520
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
389
00:20:03,640 --> 00:20:05,800
- Come on, then! (LAUGHS)
- Hey! You...!
390
00:20:22,240 --> 00:20:23,520
Oh!
391
00:20:37,800 --> 00:20:39,680
(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS)
392
00:20:47,520 --> 00:20:48,520
(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS)
393
00:20:52,360 --> 00:20:53,880
God help me.
394
00:21:00,120 --> 00:21:03,560
(GROANS) Have you found anything, bub?
395
00:21:06,280 --> 00:21:08,639
What, are you not even
talking to me anymore?
396
00:21:08,640 --> 00:21:10,639
What do you want me to talk to you about?
397
00:21:10,640 --> 00:21:12,159
How much you hate 'bullshit London'?
398
00:21:12,160 --> 00:21:14,119
Or the fact that you lied about
the menu and Kwame?
399
00:21:14,120 --> 00:21:16,199
I didn't... lie.
400
00:21:16,200 --> 00:21:19,239
I just didn't tell you some stuff.
401
00:21:19,240 --> 00:21:20,999
Why are you keeping things from me?
402
00:21:21,000 --> 00:21:23,199
I feel like I don't know
who the real Diana is anymore.
403
00:21:23,200 --> 00:21:25,639
Um, of course you do!
404
00:21:25,640 --> 00:21:27,520
I am she!
405
00:21:28,720 --> 00:21:30,679
You always used to talk about
how your family were...
406
00:21:30,680 --> 00:21:32,119
...were crazy liars, and...
407
00:21:32,120 --> 00:21:33,320
And what?
408
00:21:34,880 --> 00:21:36,879
You think I'm just like them?
409
00:21:36,880 --> 00:21:38,399
(LAUGHS)
410
00:21:38,400 --> 00:21:42,439
Well, that is a very exaggerated response
411
00:21:42,440 --> 00:21:45,079
and I think it's coming from
a place of jealousy
412
00:21:45,080 --> 00:21:47,799
because you found out
that I had an ex-boyfriend,
413
00:21:47,800 --> 00:21:50,079
and maybe you thought that I was a virgin
414
00:21:50,080 --> 00:21:51,799
- when I met you, like...
- What?
415
00:21:51,800 --> 00:21:53,999
...or something like that.
416
00:21:54,000 --> 00:21:56,039
Oh, shit! She's coming.
417
00:21:56,040 --> 00:21:58,119
Oh. June.
418
00:21:58,120 --> 00:22:02,279
June! Oh! June, don't worry about
the smudge sticks.
419
00:22:02,280 --> 00:22:03,719
Denise has got a cupboard full of them.
420
00:22:03,720 --> 00:22:05,599
- No, I'm alright.
- Well...
421
00:22:05,600 --> 00:22:08,359
No, no, no, no, no. June, June,
June, don't go in there. Don't! No!
422
00:22:08,360 --> 00:22:11,439
(STUTTERS) Just have to...
423
00:22:11,440 --> 00:22:15,679
- Yeah, here it is. I got it. I got it.
- Excellent.
424
00:22:15,680 --> 00:22:19,280
Let's go kill Jim. I mean evil Jim.
425
00:22:31,320 --> 00:22:32,760
(CHUCKLES)
426
00:22:36,120 --> 00:22:42,160
(SIGHS) Look, Harry, I am sorry...
427
00:22:43,760 --> 00:22:45,439
...for all the omitting stuff,
428
00:22:45,440 --> 00:22:49,959
but I swear I am not like them,
429
00:22:49,960 --> 00:22:52,599
nor do I ever want to be.
430
00:22:52,600 --> 00:22:54,999
I just used 'nor' in a sentence.
431
00:22:55,000 --> 00:22:56,919
Like, that's how influential you are.
432
00:22:56,920 --> 00:22:58,639
(CHUCKLES)
433
00:22:58,640 --> 00:23:02,119
I want to be with you and live with you
434
00:23:02,120 --> 00:23:04,000
and work with you because I...
435
00:23:05,560 --> 00:23:07,599
...love you, maybe.
436
00:23:07,600 --> 00:23:10,559
No, sorry, not maybe.
Arrgh! Words are weird.
437
00:23:10,560 --> 00:23:11,920
I love you.
438
00:23:13,080 --> 00:23:14,200
Definitely.
439
00:23:15,200 --> 00:23:16,800
Aw!
440
00:23:22,480 --> 00:23:24,040
Oh, my God.
441
00:23:26,360 --> 00:23:30,440
Oh, my funking G.
442
00:23:33,680 --> 00:23:37,040
- Anything?
- No.
443
00:23:38,240 --> 00:23:42,400
(WHISTLES) This bitch is going down.
444
00:23:45,160 --> 00:23:49,759
Free them from evil
and the spirit of wickedness.
445
00:23:49,760 --> 00:23:52,959
Free them from evil
and the spirit of wickedness.
446
00:23:52,960 --> 00:23:55,519
- Yeah, get out of here, spirits.
- Free them from evil...
447
00:23:55,520 --> 00:23:57,479
Well, well, well,
448
00:23:57,480 --> 00:24:00,159
if it isn't the lying swindler
that is June West,
449
00:24:00,160 --> 00:24:04,000
or should I call you Njorth-rbiar-tr?
450
00:24:06,040 --> 00:24:08,679
You mean you don't believe
I'm actually June?
451
00:24:08,680 --> 00:24:11,679
Oh, I know you're not. Wests aren't vegans.
452
00:24:11,680 --> 00:24:14,279
What kind of sick woman are you?
What do you want from us?
453
00:24:14,280 --> 00:24:19,719
Njorthrbiartr is a Norse name
given to me at the commune.
454
00:24:19,720 --> 00:24:22,919
- It means heroic.
- You think MY name's stupid...
455
00:24:22,920 --> 00:24:24,759
That still doesn't prove anything, though.
456
00:24:24,760 --> 00:24:27,279
Yeah, she's right. You don't
really know anything about us.
457
00:24:27,280 --> 00:24:30,359
I mean, you can't even remember
if I was a bubbly baby or not.
458
00:24:30,360 --> 00:24:32,119
I mean, I don't know what it is
you want from us,
459
00:24:32,120 --> 00:24:34,919
but this is where your road ends, lady.
460
00:24:34,920 --> 00:24:35,920
Out!
461
00:24:37,120 --> 00:24:40,999
You have three puncture wounds
in your right leg
462
00:24:41,000 --> 00:24:43,599
where Jim's dog bit you when you were five.
463
00:24:43,600 --> 00:24:45,800
That's why you're scared of dogs.
464
00:24:46,920 --> 00:24:49,599
I'm not scared of them.
I just wouldn't own one.
465
00:24:49,600 --> 00:24:52,439
Denise, do you still have
that heart-shaped birthmark
466
00:24:52,440 --> 00:24:53,959
on your left bum cheek?
467
00:24:53,960 --> 00:24:57,839
(GROWLS) I love that birthmark.
468
00:24:57,840 --> 00:25:02,679
- So, it IS you, then.
- Yes, indeed.
469
00:25:02,680 --> 00:25:06,880
Back from the dead. Whoo! (LAUGHS)
470
00:25:08,040 --> 00:25:11,359
OK, well, goodnight.
471
00:25:11,360 --> 00:25:15,999
I'll crash in the main bedroom.
I know where that is. (CHUCKLES)
472
00:25:16,000 --> 00:25:18,600
(YAWNS)
473
00:25:23,480 --> 00:25:27,479
DIANA: Are you, like, OK, dude?
474
00:25:27,480 --> 00:25:28,560
Yeah.
475
00:25:29,800 --> 00:25:31,000
Yeah, I'm fine.
476
00:25:32,920 --> 00:25:35,360
Alright. Well, I know you both want me out.
477
00:25:37,360 --> 00:25:38,560
So...
478
00:25:39,880 --> 00:25:41,000
...I'm gone!
479
00:25:56,800 --> 00:25:59,760
It's only for one night, yeah, your mum?
480
00:26:02,160 --> 00:26:04,000
Um...
481
00:26:35,120 --> 00:26:36,319
Where the shit is everything?
482
00:26:36,320 --> 00:26:38,359
WOMAN: Well, when Chef Zhao hosts the lunch,
483
00:26:38,360 --> 00:26:39,640
he supplies everything himself.
484
00:26:43,800 --> 00:26:45,799
I know you regret leaving...
485
00:26:45,800 --> 00:26:47,680
No, I don't regret anything.
486
00:26:50,840 --> 00:26:52,719
You set me up for a charity event
487
00:26:52,720 --> 00:26:53,919
without any ingredients.
488
00:26:53,920 --> 00:26:55,320
Oh, no!
489
00:26:58,160 --> 00:26:59,519
She has not moved in.
490
00:26:59,520 --> 00:27:02,160
Sure looks like a case of
the old moving-in to Brett.
491
00:27:09,000 --> 00:27:10,559
Do not tell Ben we were in his bin.
492
00:27:10,560 --> 00:27:12,559
Captions by Red Bee Media
493
00:27:12,560 --> 00:27:14,560
Copyright Australian
Broadcasting Corporation
494
00:27:14,610 --> 00:27:19,160
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