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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:00,750 --> 00:01:02,170 - Hello John. 2 00:01:02,200 --> 00:01:04,130 Coming round for tea tonight? 3 00:01:05,168 --> 00:01:05,888 It's chicken pie. 4 00:01:12,210 --> 00:01:12,900 - Die! 5 00:01:14,108 --> 00:01:18,658 - Congratulations DI Major, you shot your grandmother. 6 00:01:18,699 --> 00:01:19,699 Again. 7 00:01:19,734 --> 00:01:21,604 - You've obviously never tried her chicken pie. 8 00:01:21,633 --> 00:01:24,333 - I told you these tests were pointless. 9 00:01:24,360 --> 00:01:25,640 - Carver, is that you? 10 00:01:25,671 --> 00:01:27,671 - The tests are essential. 11 00:01:27,708 --> 00:01:29,878 I've installed a full software update. 12 00:01:29,917 --> 00:01:32,327 If it works he'll have faster cognition 13 00:01:32,368 --> 00:01:33,678 with no more glitches. 14 00:01:33,714 --> 00:01:35,304 - Carver were you in the room just now 15 00:01:35,336 --> 00:01:36,856 when I asked about getting porn on this? 16 00:01:36,889 --> 00:01:39,689 - No but thanks for bringing us up to speed. 17 00:01:39,720 --> 00:01:41,380 - I need something to help me relax. 18 00:01:41,411 --> 00:01:42,691 Ouch! 19 00:01:42,723 --> 00:01:44,213 Fuck a duck! 20 00:01:44,242 --> 00:01:46,312 They filter the internet in here. 21 00:01:46,347 --> 00:01:49,447 I'm making my own photo fit images to jerk off to. 22 00:01:49,488 --> 00:01:53,418 Would you have any idea how humiliating that... 23 00:01:53,458 --> 00:01:54,938 Hi. 24 00:01:54,976 --> 00:01:56,146 Hello. 25 00:01:56,185 --> 00:02:00,215 - These people are members of the AI Ethics committee. 26 00:02:00,258 --> 00:02:02,608 They're here to observe your new software update. 27 00:02:02,639 --> 00:02:03,539 - How do you do. 28 00:02:04,917 --> 00:02:07,747 - I don't think anyone wants to shake that now mate. 29 00:02:08,956 --> 00:02:11,606 - We haven't got time to sit here on our fannies. 30 00:02:12,511 --> 00:02:13,751 We've got crimes to solve. 31 00:02:20,795 --> 00:02:21,485 - Fannies? 32 00:02:21,520 --> 00:02:23,250 Are you sure about this update? 33 00:02:25,041 --> 00:02:29,361 - As you can see he's making excellent progress. 34 00:02:36,811 --> 00:02:39,231 - These maps show the location for the three 35 00:02:39,262 --> 00:02:40,612 most recent incidents. 36 00:02:40,643 --> 00:02:42,753 - Well the three points form a triangle. 37 00:02:42,783 --> 00:02:44,513 That can't be a coincidence. 38 00:02:44,543 --> 00:02:46,753 - Any three points form a triangle. 39 00:02:46,787 --> 00:02:49,757 - This is the area where the fly tipping is concentrated. 40 00:02:49,790 --> 00:02:50,830 We need you to get in there and-- 41 00:02:50,860 --> 00:02:52,310 - The fly tipping? 42 00:02:52,344 --> 00:02:53,904 We, we're Detective Inspectors. 43 00:02:53,932 --> 00:02:55,692 You want us out there to catch litterbugs? 44 00:02:55,727 --> 00:02:57,487 - After you cocked up last time you're lucky 45 00:02:57,522 --> 00:02:58,662 you're not standing in the middle of the road 46 00:02:58,695 --> 00:02:59,895 holding a bloody great lollipop! 47 00:02:59,938 --> 00:03:02,558 - We should be out there busting meth labs and pedophiles. 48 00:03:02,596 --> 00:03:03,416 - Paedophiles. 49 00:03:03,459 --> 00:03:04,319 - That's what I said, pedophiles. 50 00:03:04,356 --> 00:03:05,186 - Paedophiles. 51 00:03:05,219 --> 00:03:06,459 - That's what I said, pedophiles! 52 00:03:06,496 --> 00:03:08,456 - This is your first case John, I'm breaking you in gently. 53 00:03:08,498 --> 00:03:10,668 And Carver, you're supposed to be supervising him 54 00:03:10,707 --> 00:03:12,777 not jumping off bloody car parks! 55 00:03:13,917 --> 00:03:16,197 - I'll, uh, make sure he behaves boss. 56 00:03:17,818 --> 00:03:22,058 Any progress on the investigation into my shooting? 57 00:03:22,098 --> 00:03:23,648 - You stay well from that John, 58 00:03:23,686 --> 00:03:25,996 that's been Gilbert and Ryle's case from day one. 59 00:03:26,033 --> 00:03:27,313 - Gilbert and Ryle are crap! 60 00:03:27,345 --> 00:03:28,685 - Leave it, leave it. 61 00:03:28,725 --> 00:03:30,925 We'll get you a result on this boss. 62 00:03:30,969 --> 00:03:31,829 Come on. 63 00:03:33,834 --> 00:03:35,494 - One more thing. 64 00:03:35,525 --> 00:03:39,425 Carver's right, three points always make a triangle. 65 00:04:05,659 --> 00:04:07,349 What's going on Roy? 66 00:04:07,385 --> 00:04:10,315 I wanna know who shot me, it's like no one cares! 67 00:04:10,353 --> 00:04:11,733 Not Dennett, not Gilbert and Ryle! 68 00:04:11,768 --> 00:04:13,938 I mean not even you seem... 69 00:04:15,082 --> 00:04:15,952 What's this? 70 00:04:15,979 --> 00:04:18,259 - My secret hobby for the last year. 71 00:04:21,053 --> 00:04:25,023 Don't get excited, I haven't found any answers. 72 00:04:26,714 --> 00:04:28,724 - Operation Bluefinch. 73 00:04:28,751 --> 00:04:30,481 - Plus everything we know about your shooting. 74 00:04:30,511 --> 00:04:34,521 Faces, wheels, known associates. 75 00:04:35,827 --> 00:04:36,657 Everything. 76 00:04:40,072 --> 00:04:42,422 What? 77 00:04:42,454 --> 00:04:43,734 Don't look at me like that, it's weird. 78 00:04:43,766 --> 00:04:45,486 - I don't deserve you buddy. 79 00:04:45,526 --> 00:04:47,076 First you take the rap for the car park thing, 80 00:04:47,114 --> 00:04:49,944 which was technically my fault, and now this. 81 00:04:51,670 --> 00:04:53,710 What else you been taking care of for me? 82 00:04:56,606 --> 00:04:57,436 Kelly. 83 00:05:07,962 --> 00:05:09,142 - Hiya. 84 00:05:09,170 --> 00:05:10,620 Are you alright? 85 00:05:10,655 --> 00:05:11,895 How you doing? 86 00:05:11,932 --> 00:05:13,552 - Yeah not too bad really under the... 87 00:05:13,589 --> 00:05:16,319 Oh, sorry, you was talking to him. 88 00:05:17,075 --> 00:05:18,765 - I didn't realise you were sleeping here. 89 00:05:18,801 --> 00:05:20,421 I thought you had your own place. 90 00:05:20,458 --> 00:05:21,738 - I do have my own place Kelly. 91 00:05:21,769 --> 00:05:23,179 You just won't let me live in it. 92 00:05:23,219 --> 00:05:25,529 What are these, is it a photo-fit image? 93 00:05:25,566 --> 00:05:26,396 - Ooh... 94 00:05:26,429 --> 00:05:27,429 What's that? 95 00:05:27,465 --> 00:05:28,705 - They're, uh, confidential. 96 00:05:30,813 --> 00:05:33,403 - Well I, um, brought you over your things so... 97 00:05:33,436 --> 00:05:34,986 - Come to say that we're through? 98 00:05:35,024 --> 00:05:36,164 Do I need an attorney? 99 00:05:36,197 --> 00:05:37,027 - What? 100 00:05:37,060 --> 00:05:38,370 You mean lawyer? 101 00:05:38,407 --> 00:05:39,337 What, no. 102 00:05:39,373 --> 00:05:41,963 - I came here to ask you out for dinner. 103 00:05:43,826 --> 00:05:45,446 Because I can't remember the last time 104 00:05:45,483 --> 00:05:47,733 we had a meal together actually. 105 00:05:47,761 --> 00:05:48,931 - Okay. 106 00:05:48,969 --> 00:05:51,109 Wait, it was the night I got shot, we had that big row. 107 00:05:51,143 --> 00:05:52,733 Roy was comforting you, and I remember thinking-- 108 00:05:52,766 --> 00:05:53,936 - I should be going. 109 00:05:53,974 --> 00:05:55,394 Give me a call later, yeah. 110 00:05:57,218 --> 00:05:59,908 - Things are looking up. 111 00:05:59,945 --> 00:06:01,525 - Yeah. 112 00:06:01,568 --> 00:06:03,468 I'll just be a minute mate, yeah? 113 00:06:07,781 --> 00:06:09,651 - Since when did I support Liverpool? 114 00:06:10,887 --> 00:06:11,747 - Kelly! 115 00:06:11,785 --> 00:06:13,165 What, you're taking him out on a date? 116 00:06:13,200 --> 00:06:14,440 - I need to talk to him. 117 00:06:14,477 --> 00:06:16,477 - What about talking to me, you've ignored me phone calls. 118 00:06:16,514 --> 00:06:18,964 - Roy, these last few months have been amazing, 119 00:06:18,999 --> 00:06:21,659 but you know, it's like we've woken up 120 00:06:21,691 --> 00:06:24,211 or more specifically, he's woken up. 121 00:06:24,245 --> 00:06:26,725 - So what you just forget about us as if nuttin's happened? 122 00:06:26,765 --> 00:06:28,595 - I can't just dump John, he's vulnerable, 123 00:06:28,629 --> 00:06:30,909 you know, if he messes up they're gonna, 124 00:06:30,942 --> 00:06:32,252 they're gonna switch him off. 125 00:06:32,288 --> 00:06:34,008 - Oh bollocks will they switch him off. 126 00:06:34,048 --> 00:06:36,568 Look he's fine, Parfit's fixed him. 127 00:06:36,603 --> 00:06:40,613 - I ran a software update, he won't let me test it, 128 00:06:40,641 --> 00:06:42,991 so I don't know if it worked. 129 00:06:43,023 --> 00:06:45,513 - This new software, is it American by any chance? 130 00:06:45,543 --> 00:06:46,233 - Why do you ask? 131 00:06:47,683 --> 00:06:49,513 - Catch you later baby doll. 132 00:06:49,547 --> 00:06:51,717 Come on buddy, time we hit that garbage dump. 133 00:06:53,240 --> 00:06:54,620 - No reason in particular. 134 00:07:04,872 --> 00:07:05,842 - Diapers. 135 00:07:05,873 --> 00:07:06,703 - Nappies. 136 00:07:06,736 --> 00:07:07,766 - Aluminium cans. 137 00:07:07,806 --> 00:07:08,976 - Aluminium. 138 00:07:09,014 --> 00:07:10,294 - I feel like a hobo. 139 00:07:10,326 --> 00:07:11,946 - For fuck's sake. 140 00:07:11,983 --> 00:07:14,053 Why won't you do Dr. Parfit's test? 141 00:07:14,088 --> 00:07:16,608 - Look I don't need to be tested right, 142 00:07:16,643 --> 00:07:19,753 'cause I'm not a computer or a robot or a machine! 143 00:07:20,854 --> 00:07:23,304 I'm augmented, that's all. 144 00:07:23,339 --> 00:07:24,749 - Yeah we know that mate. 145 00:07:24,789 --> 00:07:27,239 They're psychological tests, not the Turing test. 146 00:07:27,274 --> 00:07:28,104 - What? 147 00:07:28,137 --> 00:07:29,207 - The Turing test. 148 00:07:29,241 --> 00:07:29,931 It's named after-- 149 00:07:29,966 --> 00:07:31,276 - Alan Turing, the code breaker, 150 00:07:31,312 --> 00:07:32,692 I know what the Turing test is. 151 00:07:32,728 --> 00:07:33,898 You talk to someone for an hour, 152 00:07:33,936 --> 00:07:36,146 see whether you can tell if they're gay. 153 00:07:36,179 --> 00:07:38,669 - It's definitely not that mate. 154 00:07:38,699 --> 00:07:40,149 Bloody hell, what's this? 155 00:07:41,184 --> 00:07:42,014 - A cell phone. 156 00:07:42,047 --> 00:07:43,117 - Mobile. 157 00:07:43,152 --> 00:07:44,262 There's no sim. 158 00:07:44,291 --> 00:07:45,741 Might be able to get some data-- 159 00:07:45,775 --> 00:07:47,225 - Holy shit, a foot! 160 00:07:47,259 --> 00:07:48,119 - Jesus! 161 00:07:48,157 --> 00:07:51,677 - It's, uh, male, size 10? 162 00:07:51,712 --> 00:07:52,852 No blood. 163 00:07:52,886 --> 00:07:54,916 Tissue damage indicates it was sawn off post-mortem. 164 00:07:54,957 --> 00:07:56,127 We're looking at a homicide. 165 00:07:56,165 --> 00:07:57,125 - Is it just a foot? 166 00:07:57,166 --> 00:07:59,166 But why would someone dump a single foot? 167 00:07:59,202 --> 00:08:00,622 - Oof, ritualistic? 168 00:08:00,652 --> 00:08:03,002 Partial tattoo suggests an occult significance. 169 00:08:03,034 --> 00:08:04,834 - Shit mate, looks like we're back in 170 00:08:04,863 --> 00:08:07,213 serious crimes after all. 171 00:08:07,245 --> 00:08:08,065 Ew! 172 00:08:08,108 --> 00:08:09,208 What did you do that for? 173 00:08:09,247 --> 00:08:10,077 - Sorry. 174 00:08:10,110 --> 00:08:11,660 - Fucking dickhead! 175 00:08:11,698 --> 00:08:12,978 Put it in a bag! 176 00:08:17,566 --> 00:08:20,776 Forensics said six hours for a full DNA analysis. 177 00:08:20,810 --> 00:08:23,540 - Judy, I need you to contact missing persons, 178 00:08:23,572 --> 00:08:24,882 try to ID this tattoo. 179 00:08:24,918 --> 00:08:26,888 - Okay, my name still isn't Judy though. 180 00:08:26,920 --> 00:08:28,680 - We're gonna crack this one John, I can feel it. 181 00:08:28,715 --> 00:08:31,605 - Look who it is, Inspector Gadget. 182 00:08:31,649 --> 00:08:33,129 - Beat it assholes, I'm busy. 183 00:08:33,167 --> 00:08:36,067 - Yeah, busy being interviewed by us. 184 00:08:36,101 --> 00:08:37,341 About your shooting. 185 00:08:48,286 --> 00:08:50,316 - You update Dennett on the foot. 186 00:08:50,357 --> 00:08:51,807 - No you found it, you deserve the credit. 187 00:08:51,841 --> 00:08:53,261 - There's no I in team Roy. 188 00:08:53,291 --> 00:08:54,151 This one's yours. 189 00:09:03,197 --> 00:09:06,407 - Don't be nervous DI Major, we're not gonna charge ya. 190 00:09:06,442 --> 00:09:08,272 - Not unless you battery's low. 191 00:09:10,239 --> 00:09:13,349 - That was a joke, you know, about you being a computer. 192 00:09:13,380 --> 00:09:15,070 - You shouldn't make jokes like that. 193 00:09:15,106 --> 00:09:16,866 It's not very PC. 194 00:09:17,971 --> 00:09:19,631 - What have you got on my shooting? 195 00:09:20,421 --> 00:09:22,391 Gunman had a red Jeep. 196 00:09:22,423 --> 00:09:24,323 Did you put out an APB on the vehicle? 197 00:09:24,356 --> 00:09:25,626 - Alright Siri. 198 00:09:26,462 --> 00:09:29,362 We'll ask the questions. 199 00:09:29,396 --> 00:09:33,086 - We heard someone gave you a name just before you got shot. 200 00:09:33,124 --> 00:09:34,614 - Give me a name! 201 00:09:35,816 --> 00:09:36,646 Yeah. 202 00:09:38,923 --> 00:09:41,893 I can't remember it, I've tried but I just... 203 00:09:43,030 --> 00:09:43,860 - Okay. 204 00:09:45,239 --> 00:09:46,169 I understand. 205 00:09:48,208 --> 00:09:50,898 Have you tried switching yourself off and on again? 206 00:09:50,935 --> 00:09:53,895 - I'm not a computer, I'm a detective, a human detective. 207 00:09:53,938 --> 00:09:57,148 - It's just banter, we're not serious. 208 00:09:57,182 --> 00:09:58,912 - Right this is who you should be after. 209 00:09:58,943 --> 00:10:01,053 Liam Cleasby, known associate of the shooters. 210 00:10:01,083 --> 00:10:04,093 We had him a few days ago but he got away. 211 00:10:04,120 --> 00:10:06,850 - We saw Cleasby a year ago, small-time dealer, 212 00:10:06,882 --> 00:10:07,852 he didn't know anything. 213 00:10:07,883 --> 00:10:08,883 - So that's it then. 214 00:10:08,918 --> 00:10:10,158 Interview concludes. 215 00:10:10,195 --> 00:10:11,325 Recording discontinued. 216 00:10:11,369 --> 00:10:13,409 - What, that's it? 217 00:10:13,440 --> 00:10:15,720 This is meant to be a homicide investigation. 218 00:10:15,753 --> 00:10:16,933 - Yeah, is it though? 219 00:10:16,961 --> 00:10:18,001 - What do you mean is it? 220 00:10:18,031 --> 00:10:19,271 I'm the one that was murdered! 221 00:10:19,308 --> 00:10:21,308 - Yeah, you were murdered, 222 00:10:21,344 --> 00:10:23,244 but you're not murdered anymore are you? 223 00:10:23,277 --> 00:10:25,277 So is it a murder case or not? 224 00:10:25,314 --> 00:10:29,044 - I'd call it attempted murder, possibly GBH. 225 00:10:29,076 --> 00:10:31,316 - I'll be honest, you're giving the lawyers a real headache. 226 00:10:31,354 --> 00:10:33,224 - Are you telling me I've not been murdered? 227 00:10:33,253 --> 00:10:36,013 I've been fucking murdered! 228 00:10:36,049 --> 00:10:37,149 - Calm down. 229 00:10:37,188 --> 00:10:38,428 Control, ALT, delete. 230 00:10:40,743 --> 00:10:42,783 Right, thanks for your co-operation. 231 00:10:42,814 --> 00:10:44,204 We might speak to you again in future. 232 00:10:44,229 --> 00:10:46,019 - We'll leave you on standby. 233 00:10:46,059 --> 00:10:46,989 - Standby! 234 00:10:47,025 --> 00:10:48,745 Like a computer. 235 00:10:49,856 --> 00:10:50,926 - Douchebags. 236 00:10:50,960 --> 00:10:52,170 Douchebags? 237 00:11:04,491 --> 00:11:06,461 Catch all that Cleasby? 238 00:11:06,493 --> 00:11:07,983 - I'll pass it on. 239 00:11:08,012 --> 00:11:09,432 What happens to him now? 240 00:11:09,461 --> 00:11:11,021 - That's above my pay grade. 241 00:11:11,049 --> 00:11:12,779 He doesn't remember anything. 242 00:11:12,810 --> 00:11:13,980 - He remembers the Jeep. 243 00:11:23,130 --> 00:11:24,370 Pity. 244 00:11:24,407 --> 00:11:26,377 I always liked this car. 245 00:11:36,488 --> 00:11:39,148 - The tattoo's a Celtic symbol associated with 246 00:11:39,181 --> 00:11:40,151 the Isle of Man. 247 00:11:40,182 --> 00:11:41,802 I'm liaising with the Manx police, 248 00:11:41,839 --> 00:11:43,839 tissue samples are with forensics. 249 00:11:43,875 --> 00:11:44,905 - Okay DI Carver. 250 00:11:44,945 --> 00:11:46,255 I'll give you 24 hours. 251 00:11:46,291 --> 00:11:48,021 Let's see if you can prove people wrong. 252 00:11:48,052 --> 00:11:49,192 - Thanks boss. 253 00:11:51,400 --> 00:11:52,880 What people? 254 00:11:52,919 --> 00:11:54,299 - Well you know, all the ones who said 255 00:11:54,334 --> 00:11:56,094 you were washed up after Major died, 256 00:11:56,129 --> 00:11:58,409 who assumed you were an alcoholic or had a breakdown, 257 00:11:58,441 --> 00:12:00,311 you lost focus so much. 258 00:12:00,340 --> 00:12:02,960 God knows I said it myself a hundred times. 259 00:12:04,068 --> 00:12:08,378 Anyway, pep talk over, go and find me that killer. 260 00:12:13,560 --> 00:12:15,110 - Just because I'm alive, 261 00:12:15,148 --> 00:12:16,838 doesn't mean I'm not a murder victim. 262 00:12:16,874 --> 00:12:17,844 - Listen mate, I don't mean to interrupt, 263 00:12:17,875 --> 00:12:19,945 but in this country we drive on the left. 264 00:12:19,980 --> 00:12:21,050 - What? 265 00:12:22,258 --> 00:12:23,088 Oh shit! 266 00:12:27,056 --> 00:12:27,886 Sorry. 267 00:12:35,962 --> 00:12:37,862 - Listen mate, I just wanna say thanks 268 00:12:37,895 --> 00:12:39,895 for letting me take the credit for the foot. 269 00:12:39,931 --> 00:12:41,111 - Oh least I could do. 270 00:12:41,139 --> 00:12:43,039 After the work you done on my shooting. 271 00:12:43,072 --> 00:12:44,042 Operation Bluefinch. 272 00:12:44,073 --> 00:12:46,353 - We're a good team. 273 00:12:46,386 --> 00:12:47,456 We always were. 274 00:12:49,044 --> 00:12:50,604 - You don't know the half of it. 275 00:12:51,667 --> 00:12:53,257 - What do you mean? 276 00:12:53,289 --> 00:12:54,949 - How do you think that foot got 277 00:12:54,981 --> 00:12:57,261 on the garbage tip in the first place? 278 00:12:57,293 --> 00:12:59,093 - The killer dumped it there? 279 00:12:59,123 --> 00:13:03,403 - Or, maybe a good friend of yours put it there? 280 00:13:03,437 --> 00:13:05,407 A friend who has access to the morgue, 281 00:13:05,439 --> 00:13:08,199 who can borrow a bit of evidence to give your career 282 00:13:08,235 --> 00:13:10,575 a much needed shot in the ass. 283 00:13:12,274 --> 00:13:13,284 - Thanks John. 284 00:13:13,309 --> 00:13:14,349 That's very thoughtful. 285 00:13:14,379 --> 00:13:15,349 - Yeah? 286 00:13:15,380 --> 00:13:17,280 'Cause I was worried you might not be happy. 287 00:13:18,314 --> 00:13:20,144 - Why, what would you think I'd say? 288 00:13:20,178 --> 00:13:21,278 - I dunno. 289 00:13:21,317 --> 00:13:23,937 - Maybe something like you're a complete dickhead? 290 00:13:23,975 --> 00:13:27,595 You've tampered with evidence, desecrated a corpse, 291 00:13:27,634 --> 00:13:31,224 wasted police time, and now we're both gonna go to prison. 292 00:13:31,258 --> 00:13:33,298 - You're pissed at me aren't you? 293 00:13:33,329 --> 00:13:34,159 - No. 294 00:13:34,192 --> 00:13:35,332 - You are, you're pissed. 295 00:13:35,366 --> 00:13:39,086 - No, I'm pissed off, you American twat, pissed off! 296 00:13:39,128 --> 00:13:43,408 Pissed means drunk and I'm stone cold fucking sober! 297 00:13:47,240 --> 00:13:48,170 - He's real pissed. 298 00:13:48,206 --> 00:13:49,036 - What were you thinking? 299 00:13:49,069 --> 00:13:51,209 - I was trying to help! 300 00:13:51,244 --> 00:13:53,454 You wanted to get back on serious crimes! 301 00:13:53,487 --> 00:13:54,937 - Not by committing one! 302 00:13:54,972 --> 00:13:56,912 What happens when the DNA comes back 303 00:13:56,939 --> 00:13:58,179 and it matches a body we've already got? 304 00:13:58,216 --> 00:14:00,006 - I've thought of that. 305 00:14:00,046 --> 00:14:04,426 We say it's not the same victim, but twins. 306 00:14:04,464 --> 00:14:06,884 Identical twins have the same DNA! 307 00:14:06,915 --> 00:14:07,605 - Do they? 308 00:14:07,639 --> 00:14:08,709 - Dunno, probably. 309 00:14:08,744 --> 00:14:10,194 - Oh fucking hell! 310 00:14:10,228 --> 00:14:11,918 Look. We're in deep shit. 311 00:14:11,954 --> 00:14:13,514 We need to fix this and now! 312 00:14:13,542 --> 00:14:16,272 - Yeah, yeah and if anyone can do that it's us, 313 00:14:16,303 --> 00:14:19,133 and I would honestly love to help, 314 00:14:19,168 --> 00:14:22,928 but I've got this date with Kelly in 20 minutes so, um... 315 00:14:31,318 --> 00:14:34,008 You okay walking from here? 316 00:14:44,193 --> 00:14:45,333 I feel like we've been here before. 317 00:14:45,367 --> 00:14:48,057 - What sitting across a table avoiding a conversation 318 00:14:48,094 --> 00:14:49,234 we know we should have? 319 00:14:49,267 --> 00:14:51,747 - No, no, I mean this restaurant. 320 00:14:51,787 --> 00:14:53,337 - Yeah we have, yeah. 321 00:14:53,375 --> 00:14:55,095 It used to be a bit scruffier they've done it up. 322 00:14:55,135 --> 00:14:58,095 They've, you know, they ripped it apart and modernised it. 323 00:14:58,138 --> 00:14:59,378 - Bit like me then. 324 00:14:59,415 --> 00:15:02,135 - I should give you a review on TripAdvisor. 325 00:15:02,177 --> 00:15:03,037 - How many stars? 326 00:15:03,972 --> 00:15:06,042 - Yes well I don't know that yet do I? 327 00:15:06,077 --> 00:15:10,147 - Oh I remember, we came here for your birthday. 328 00:15:10,185 --> 00:15:12,975 You were wasted, I'm surprised they let you back in. 329 00:15:13,015 --> 00:15:13,975 - No I was not. 330 00:15:14,016 --> 00:15:16,156 - Totally off your face. 331 00:15:16,191 --> 00:15:18,301 You told the waiter he looked like Elton John. 332 00:15:18,331 --> 00:15:19,711 - I didn't! 333 00:15:19,746 --> 00:15:20,676 I did! 334 00:15:22,680 --> 00:15:23,540 I did! 335 00:15:23,577 --> 00:15:24,987 Yeah but he did. 336 00:15:25,027 --> 00:15:26,267 Well a crap one. 337 00:15:26,304 --> 00:15:27,514 I wonder if he's still here. 338 00:15:30,999 --> 00:15:32,099 No he's not here. 339 00:15:32,138 --> 00:15:33,378 - He's not here. 340 00:15:33,415 --> 00:15:35,275 You're an embarrassment John. 341 00:15:35,313 --> 00:15:36,313 - I'm an embarrassment? 342 00:15:36,349 --> 00:15:38,349 I had to carry you home that night. 343 00:15:49,569 --> 00:15:51,779 - Hm, that's not like you. 344 00:15:51,812 --> 00:15:53,682 - Well I've been modernised haven't I? 345 00:15:59,130 --> 00:16:01,170 - Answer the phone you knob. 346 00:16:04,446 --> 00:16:05,516 - What's the problem? 347 00:16:05,550 --> 00:16:06,830 - Oh fuck! 348 00:16:06,862 --> 00:16:08,552 This is the problem. 349 00:16:08,588 --> 00:16:11,038 Your science project's gone very horribly wrong. 350 00:16:14,283 --> 00:16:15,603 - Does Dennett know about this? 351 00:16:15,629 --> 00:16:18,119 - Not until I show her, no. 352 00:16:18,149 --> 00:16:20,049 - You are not serious! 353 00:16:20,082 --> 00:16:22,462 - Look, I know he's me partner but he's a police officer. 354 00:16:22,498 --> 00:16:25,118 He's meant to protect the public from people like... 355 00:16:26,261 --> 00:16:27,641 - What are you doing? 356 00:16:27,676 --> 00:16:30,576 - Oops, CCTV footage seems to have vanished. 357 00:16:30,610 --> 00:16:31,580 - So? 358 00:16:31,611 --> 00:16:33,061 We'll still get caught. 359 00:16:33,095 --> 00:16:34,855 And this time, I'm not taking the blame. 360 00:16:34,890 --> 00:16:37,480 - Okay, think about this Carver, do the Math. 361 00:16:37,513 --> 00:16:42,483 If Dennett finds out, the whole AI project gets shut down. 362 00:16:42,829 --> 00:16:44,179 - Maybe it should. 363 00:16:44,210 --> 00:16:45,110 He's shit! 364 00:16:45,142 --> 00:16:46,282 You've failed. 365 00:16:46,315 --> 00:16:47,445 You should both be fired. 366 00:16:47,489 --> 00:16:49,249 - Oh fired. 367 00:16:49,284 --> 00:16:50,254 He's an AI. 368 00:16:50,285 --> 00:16:52,595 You know what happens to artificial things 369 00:16:52,632 --> 00:16:53,772 when they pull the plug? 370 00:16:59,259 --> 00:17:00,779 - Fuck's sake! 371 00:17:00,812 --> 00:17:03,752 - Okay well that was the photocopier but you get the point. 372 00:17:05,576 --> 00:17:06,396 - Bullshit. 373 00:17:06,439 --> 00:17:07,409 It won't kill him. 374 00:17:07,440 --> 00:17:09,510 - Do you wanna take that chance? 375 00:17:15,137 --> 00:17:19,207 - So yeah I had some therapy after you, after you, 376 00:17:19,245 --> 00:17:21,515 some grief counselling, CBT, that sort of thing. 377 00:17:21,557 --> 00:17:24,627 Actually I had, I had so much that I... 378 00:17:24,664 --> 00:17:27,084 I'm now training to be counsellor. 379 00:17:27,115 --> 00:17:28,905 I work with police officers actually. 380 00:17:28,944 --> 00:17:29,884 - You go girl! 381 00:17:29,910 --> 00:17:31,430 - Well I just, you know, wanna help people 382 00:17:31,464 --> 00:17:32,674 who've been through the dame thing as me. 383 00:17:32,706 --> 00:17:35,426 Not, not the, um, husband coming back from the dead bit, 384 00:17:35,468 --> 00:17:37,258 not that bit 'cause that's weird that bit. 385 00:17:37,297 --> 00:17:39,297 - So are you still working as a realtor? 386 00:17:39,334 --> 00:17:40,784 - Estate Agent? 387 00:17:40,818 --> 00:17:42,848 No, no, no, God no I gave that up months ago. 388 00:17:42,889 --> 00:17:44,679 I don't know why I didn't do it before. 389 00:17:44,718 --> 00:17:49,278 God, the sense of freedom and release was like, oh my God. 390 00:17:51,346 --> 00:17:53,446 Obviously tinged with sadness as well. 391 00:17:53,486 --> 00:17:55,796 - You've turned your life around Kel. 392 00:17:55,833 --> 00:17:57,423 That's great. 393 00:17:57,455 --> 00:17:59,315 Second chances, aye? 394 00:17:59,354 --> 00:18:01,434 It's what it's all about. 395 00:18:06,775 --> 00:18:08,875 - So, uh, in a counselling session I might say 396 00:18:08,915 --> 00:18:11,845 something like, have you been experiencing 397 00:18:11,883 --> 00:18:15,443 feelings of anger, and you, you might say, 398 00:18:15,473 --> 00:18:16,853 what would you say? 399 00:18:16,888 --> 00:18:17,718 - What? 400 00:18:17,751 --> 00:18:19,621 Oh right, no, yeah, um. 401 00:18:19,650 --> 00:18:23,480 Yeah, uh, well I got kinda crabby at work today. 402 00:18:23,516 --> 00:18:24,336 - Good. 403 00:18:24,379 --> 00:18:26,139 And then how is your concentration, 404 00:18:26,174 --> 00:18:28,664 is that easier or harder, you know, 405 00:18:28,693 --> 00:18:30,733 since the software update? 406 00:18:30,764 --> 00:18:32,844 - How do you know I had a software update? 407 00:18:35,666 --> 00:18:37,246 - Hmm. 408 00:18:37,288 --> 00:18:38,118 Ooh. 409 00:18:39,842 --> 00:18:41,812 I think someone mentioned it at the lab 410 00:18:41,844 --> 00:18:42,714 when I came in to the-- 411 00:18:42,742 --> 00:18:44,642 - God, I don't believe this. 412 00:18:44,675 --> 00:18:45,945 You're testing me. 413 00:18:45,986 --> 00:18:46,816 - John. 414 00:18:46,849 --> 00:18:47,779 - Is she here? 415 00:18:47,816 --> 00:18:50,226 Dr. Parfit, she is, in't she? 416 00:18:50,267 --> 00:18:50,957 Listening. 417 00:18:50,991 --> 00:18:52,231 - Of course she's not listening! 418 00:18:52,269 --> 00:18:53,169 Don't be silly! 419 00:18:56,721 --> 00:19:00,381 I'm gonna phone her later and tell her what you said. 420 00:19:00,415 --> 00:19:02,555 - My own wife is a stool pigeon! 421 00:19:02,589 --> 00:19:03,449 - What? 422 00:19:03,487 --> 00:19:04,727 - I thought this was a date. 423 00:19:04,764 --> 00:19:06,634 I thought you were doing this because you cared! 424 00:19:06,662 --> 00:19:08,532 - I do care very deeply about you John, 425 00:19:08,561 --> 00:19:10,531 that is why I'm trying to help you. 426 00:19:10,563 --> 00:19:11,393 - By tricking me? 427 00:19:12,358 --> 00:19:13,358 Spying on me? 428 00:19:13,393 --> 00:19:14,773 - No, Dr. Parfit said you weren't doing your tests 429 00:19:14,808 --> 00:19:15,878 and I was worried about you. 430 00:19:15,913 --> 00:19:17,543 She needs to know how you are feeling. 431 00:19:17,570 --> 00:19:19,920 - If you gave two bits about my feelings Kelly, 432 00:19:19,951 --> 00:19:21,571 we wouldn't be here right now! 433 00:19:37,279 --> 00:19:38,489 Fuck! 434 00:19:38,522 --> 00:19:39,762 - Date not go well? 435 00:19:39,799 --> 00:19:41,839 - No, it did not go well! 436 00:19:41,870 --> 00:19:42,870 - Did you saw her foot off? 437 00:19:42,905 --> 00:19:44,005 - What? 438 00:19:44,044 --> 00:19:44,914 No. 439 00:19:44,942 --> 00:19:46,602 - You're making progress then aren't ya? 440 00:19:46,633 --> 00:19:48,983 - Why is everyone busting my balls today? 441 00:19:49,015 --> 00:19:51,255 - Oi, ghost in the shell. 442 00:19:51,293 --> 00:19:53,503 Dennett wants to see you both. 443 00:19:53,537 --> 00:19:55,607 She doesn't sound happy. 444 00:19:55,642 --> 00:19:57,272 - Maybe it's something to do with 445 00:19:57,299 --> 00:19:57,959 perverting the course of justice. 446 00:19:57,989 --> 00:19:59,299 - What do you mean? 447 00:19:59,336 --> 00:20:00,576 I thought you were fixing it? 448 00:20:00,613 --> 00:20:01,963 Have you not fixed it? 449 00:20:02,960 --> 00:20:04,340 - What, you mean going back in time 450 00:20:04,375 --> 00:20:05,645 and stop you from being a dickhead? 451 00:20:05,687 --> 00:20:07,717 - Carver, the committee will switch me off! 452 00:20:07,758 --> 00:20:09,278 Can't you take the blame? 453 00:20:09,311 --> 00:20:10,591 Again, last time I promise. 454 00:20:10,623 --> 00:20:11,423 - No! 455 00:20:11,451 --> 00:20:12,631 - For me, please! 456 00:20:12,659 --> 00:20:14,349 - Well you said there's no I in team. 457 00:20:14,385 --> 00:20:15,835 - Well it turns out there no u in honor. 458 00:20:15,869 --> 00:20:18,359 - There is a u if you fucking spell it properly! 459 00:20:26,432 --> 00:20:27,712 - It's about this foot business. 460 00:20:27,743 --> 00:20:29,093 - Ooh, um, the thing is ma'am, 461 00:20:29,124 --> 00:20:32,614 we think there's a serial killer targeting twins. 462 00:20:32,645 --> 00:20:34,575 - You need to drop the case. 463 00:20:34,612 --> 00:20:35,892 - What? 464 00:20:35,924 --> 00:20:38,104 - Communication from MI5, the whole thing's been classified. 465 00:20:38,133 --> 00:20:40,523 We're to act like we never found a foot in the first place. 466 00:20:40,549 --> 00:20:41,549 - But boss I mean that's-- 467 00:20:41,585 --> 00:20:43,785 - A pain in the arse, but it can't be helped. 468 00:20:43,828 --> 00:20:44,728 Case closed. 469 00:20:51,595 --> 00:20:52,765 - You did this. 470 00:20:53,907 --> 00:20:54,527 You and Parfit. 471 00:20:54,563 --> 00:20:56,293 You had my back after all. 472 00:20:56,324 --> 00:20:58,124 - We should probably have this bit of the conversation 473 00:20:58,153 --> 00:20:59,503 after we've left the office. 474 00:20:59,534 --> 00:21:01,984 - Ooh, um, before I forget, 475 00:21:02,019 --> 00:21:02,879 I caught the fly-tipper. 476 00:21:02,916 --> 00:21:03,776 - What? - What? 477 00:21:03,814 --> 00:21:06,684 - Sorry. Yeah, I forgot to mention it. 478 00:21:06,713 --> 00:21:08,963 A cell phone was recovered from the fly-tipping site. 479 00:21:08,991 --> 00:21:12,551 Analysis of the data led me to identify a suspect. 480 00:21:12,581 --> 00:21:13,791 He's made a full confession. 481 00:21:13,824 --> 00:21:16,764 - Excellent work DI Major, you're a credit to the force. 482 00:21:16,792 --> 00:21:17,972 - Just doin' my duty. 483 00:21:18,000 --> 00:21:18,830 - Duty. 484 00:21:18,863 --> 00:21:19,733 - DI Carver? 485 00:21:19,761 --> 00:21:21,731 You could learn a lot from this man. 486 00:21:21,763 --> 00:21:22,593 Dismissed. 487 00:21:22,626 --> 00:21:23,656 Thank you boss. 488 00:21:24,731 --> 00:21:29,701 - Bellend. 489 00:21:45,752 --> 00:21:47,132 How did you manage to hack into MI5 490 00:21:47,167 --> 00:21:49,027 and send that fake message? 491 00:21:49,066 --> 00:21:53,096 - Please, I've been doing that stuff since kindergarten. 492 00:21:53,139 --> 00:21:55,729 - Well you can't do it for him every time he screws up. 493 00:21:55,762 --> 00:21:57,942 - He won't screw up from now on. 494 00:21:57,971 --> 00:22:01,351 I've updated the update and reset the language defaults. 495 00:22:01,389 --> 00:22:05,909 This one really will enhance his cognition significantly. 496 00:22:08,706 --> 00:22:10,466 I got shot. 497 00:22:26,724 --> 00:22:28,804 - Yeah that's fine yeah, leave him like that. 498 00:22:28,830 --> 00:22:29,760 Brilliant. 499 00:22:29,796 --> 00:22:30,796 - I'll just... 500 00:23:08,870 --> 00:23:09,700 - Major! 501 00:23:18,017 --> 00:23:19,427 - I have got one lead. 502 00:23:20,675 --> 00:23:22,775 You can use it to charge a phone off 'yer head. 503 00:23:27,889 --> 00:23:29,439 - Have you been seeing someone? 504 00:23:30,236 --> 00:23:31,886 - Yes I have John, yeah. 505 00:23:37,899 --> 00:23:38,729 - Ooh! 506 00:23:42,490 --> 00:23:44,910 - You horrible little scumbag! 507 00:23:51,947 --> 00:23:53,047 Jesus! 508 00:23:53,086 --> 00:23:54,256 I think he's got a knife. 35639

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