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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:31,440 --> 00:00:32,800 Fuck. 2 00:00:34,800 --> 00:00:36,000 Shit! 3 00:00:39,080 --> 00:00:41,879 Hello? Hi, Adam. 4 00:00:41,880 --> 00:00:44,639 It's Shruti, one of the SHOs. Sorry to disturb you. 5 00:00:44,640 --> 00:00:47,439 Erm, you're on the rota for labour ward today, 6 00:00:47,440 --> 00:00:50,039 and Mr Lockhart... Er, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 7 00:00:50,040 --> 00:00:52,759 Erm, tell him I'm really sorry. 8 00:00:52,760 --> 00:00:55,480 I think there's been an accident. I've been sat here for an hour... 9 00:00:59,320 --> 00:01:00,880 And I'll be there in a minute. 10 00:01:02,600 --> 00:01:04,559 Well, I'm not dead, am I? 11 00:01:04,560 --> 00:01:07,079 Please tell me you haven't ordered a coffin. 12 00:01:07,080 --> 00:01:10,239 Of course I'm not having an affair. I wouldn't have the time. 13 00:01:10,240 --> 00:01:13,759 I just fell asleep last night when I went to the car. 14 00:01:13,760 --> 00:01:16,599 Who did you phone? Please tell me you haven't phoned the police. 15 00:01:16,600 --> 00:01:18,399 Well, who did you phone, then? 16 00:01:18,400 --> 00:01:19,959 Oh, sorry. 17 00:01:19,960 --> 00:01:21,200 Who did you phone, then? 18 00:01:22,400 --> 00:01:24,040 My mum?! 19 00:01:25,480 --> 00:01:27,919 Shit. Are you deranged? 20 00:01:27,920 --> 00:01:29,919 And what did she...? 21 00:01:32,120 --> 00:01:34,799 Don't go anywhere. I'm going to call you right back. 22 00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:36,959 Is coming out! 23 00:01:36,960 --> 00:01:38,479 Is coming out! 24 00:01:38,480 --> 00:01:40,919 Well, a stroke of luck, you've come to the right place. 25 00:01:40,920 --> 00:01:42,599 Let's get you up to labour ward, shall we? 26 00:01:42,600 --> 00:01:44,399 It's, erm, a bit of a walk, I'm afraid. 27 00:01:45,800 --> 00:01:48,079 Do you mind if I have a quick check? 28 00:01:48,080 --> 00:01:49,879 I'm a doctor. Probably should have said. 29 00:01:49,880 --> 00:01:51,319 I'm Adam. And you are...? 30 00:01:51,320 --> 00:01:53,159 Andrea. Andrea. 31 00:01:56,200 --> 00:02:01,759 OK. OK, Andrea, so, erm, baby's arm 32 00:02:01,760 --> 00:02:04,280 has come out. That is normal? 33 00:02:05,400 --> 00:02:08,239 Take a wild guess. Baby is lying sideways. 34 00:02:08,240 --> 00:02:10,839 Do you understand that? Sideways? 35 00:02:10,840 --> 00:02:13,519 So you need a Caesarean section. Oh, Caesarean. 36 00:02:13,520 --> 00:02:16,119 I've got a scalpel in my back pocket. You'll be fine. 37 00:02:16,120 --> 00:02:17,479 Shall we go? 38 00:02:17,480 --> 00:02:19,720 Yeah. Yeah? That's it. 39 00:02:21,400 --> 00:02:23,479 That's it. You OK? 40 00:02:23,480 --> 00:02:26,919 Erm, Andrea, I know a short cut. Let's go this way. 41 00:02:26,920 --> 00:02:28,639 I don't want to hurry you, Andrea, 42 00:02:28,640 --> 00:02:31,119 but we've got to get going. You're doing brilliantly. 43 00:02:31,120 --> 00:02:33,359 - It's OK. Deep breaths. - Mind yourselves! 44 00:02:33,360 --> 00:02:35,439 Come on, then, quickly. Hurry up. 45 00:02:35,440 --> 00:02:38,119 That's it, we're nearly there. 46 00:02:38,120 --> 00:02:40,079 We're going to go up in the staff lift. 47 00:02:40,080 --> 00:02:41,320 Nearly there, nearly there. 48 00:02:42,640 --> 00:02:46,159 Come on. This is lift? It's safe. Come on. 49 00:02:46,160 --> 00:02:49,039 Really? Yeah. You can do it. I can't! 50 00:02:49,040 --> 00:02:50,639 No, wait. Wait, wait. 51 00:02:50,640 --> 00:02:53,159 Wait for it. No, no, no. OK, are you ready? 52 00:02:53,160 --> 00:02:55,959 Three, two, one. 53 00:02:55,960 --> 00:02:58,479 Keep breathing. Nice deep breaths. 54 00:02:58,480 --> 00:03:00,719 When I say so, we're going to jump out of the lift. 55 00:03:00,720 --> 00:03:02,119 Are you a real doctor? 56 00:03:02,120 --> 00:03:03,759 Fair question... 57 00:03:03,760 --> 00:03:05,919 ..though, strangely, one you've asked me 58 00:03:05,920 --> 00:03:07,639 after you showed me your vagina. 59 00:03:07,640 --> 00:03:10,479 Right, there you go. Yes? 60 00:03:10,480 --> 00:03:12,639 OK, so, let's get ready. 61 00:03:12,640 --> 00:03:14,679 Get ready. 62 00:03:14,680 --> 00:03:17,359 And jump! Don't worry, don't worry. 63 00:03:17,360 --> 00:03:20,080 The lift will go round and we'll have another go. 64 00:03:21,320 --> 00:03:23,919 You're doing really well. What's happening? 65 00:03:23,920 --> 00:03:25,559 It's just going through the... 66 00:03:25,560 --> 00:03:27,359 ..through the roof bit before it goes down. 67 00:03:28,400 --> 00:03:30,319 All right? It'll be light again soon. 68 00:03:30,320 --> 00:03:32,480 Something's wrong! Look! OK. 69 00:03:33,920 --> 00:03:36,159 Jesus Christ. We call this a cord prolapse. 70 00:03:36,160 --> 00:03:38,839 Ideally, it would happen on labour ward, not in a mad lift. 71 00:03:38,840 --> 00:03:41,439 OK, Andrea, everything's going to be fine. 72 00:03:41,440 --> 00:03:42,959 I mean, it might be fine. 73 00:03:42,960 --> 00:03:45,479 If the cord gets cold, then baby stops getting blood. 74 00:03:45,480 --> 00:03:47,439 No more blood, no more baby. 75 00:03:47,440 --> 00:03:50,319 Right, hold it inside. You understand? Inside. 76 00:03:50,320 --> 00:03:51,999 Yeah. Come on, come on, come on. 77 00:03:52,000 --> 00:03:54,359 Are you the SHO? Staff lifts now. 78 00:03:54,360 --> 00:03:56,239 Bring a hospital bed and a box of gloves. 79 00:03:56,240 --> 00:03:58,479 Literally now. Cord prolapse. 80 00:03:58,480 --> 00:04:00,799 Right, come on, Andrea, 81 00:04:00,800 --> 00:04:02,279 we need to get off. Get ready. 82 00:04:02,280 --> 00:04:04,999 And jump! Jump! Jump! Can't! Fuck it. 83 00:04:05,000 --> 00:04:06,519 Come on. OK? 84 00:04:09,520 --> 00:04:11,080 Andrea, stay there. 85 00:04:12,320 --> 00:04:14,719 Get her up on the bed. Knee-elbow position, 86 00:04:14,720 --> 00:04:16,519 replace the cord, get her round to theatre. 87 00:04:16,520 --> 00:04:18,719 I'm going to change into some scrubs. You consent her. 88 00:04:18,720 --> 00:04:21,359 Consent her for...? A deep-tissue massage. 89 00:04:21,360 --> 00:04:23,199 It's a cord prolapse! 90 00:04:23,200 --> 00:04:25,439 Caesarean! Oh, well, when you say, 91 00:04:25,440 --> 00:04:27,999 "knee-elbow position"... 92 00:04:28,000 --> 00:04:29,359 My mistake, sorry. 93 00:04:29,360 --> 00:04:31,439 Your outfit looks a lot like what the doctors wear. 94 00:04:32,800 --> 00:04:34,079 I'll do this. You push the bed. 95 00:04:34,080 --> 00:04:35,440 Get up on here. That's it. 96 00:04:38,760 --> 00:04:40,239 A bit less Alton Towers. 97 00:04:40,240 --> 00:04:41,879 I'm so sorry. 98 00:04:41,880 --> 00:04:43,479 Why don't I drive? 99 00:04:43,480 --> 00:04:44,959 You go and find the anaesthetist. 100 00:04:44,960 --> 00:04:46,999 That's the doctor that makes you go sleep-sleep. 101 00:04:48,680 --> 00:04:49,999 I've found the husband. 102 00:04:50,000 --> 00:04:51,519 He's just coming up from reception. 103 00:04:51,520 --> 00:04:54,359 OK, Andrea, this is going to be fine. You'll have a baby 104 00:04:54,360 --> 00:04:57,359 in five minutes. And is free? Yep, free. Completely free. 105 00:04:57,360 --> 00:04:59,039 We're not even allowed to accept tips. 106 00:05:00,560 --> 00:05:02,759 Dr Adam, you should see me next. It's really urgent. 107 00:05:02,760 --> 00:05:05,199 Really? Erika, darling, can you just take a seat for me, please? 108 00:05:05,200 --> 00:05:08,759 Tracy! How was Majorca? Did Mick like the hotel? 109 00:05:08,760 --> 00:05:10,439 Erika, just go back to triage. 110 00:05:11,960 --> 00:05:13,679 I did explain that the doctor would be 111 00:05:13,680 --> 00:05:15,839 holding the cord inside. 112 00:05:15,840 --> 00:05:18,319 Probably didn't tell him I'd be wearing her like Kermit the Frog. 113 00:05:18,320 --> 00:05:19,719 I don't understand. 114 00:05:19,720 --> 00:05:24,039 That's baby's heartbeat. Welcome to the NHS. 115 00:05:33,320 --> 00:05:34,880 This is obs and gynae. 116 00:05:35,880 --> 00:05:37,400 Also known as brats and twats. 117 00:05:39,320 --> 00:05:41,560 You're generally sailing the ship alone... 118 00:05:42,600 --> 00:05:45,279 ..a ship that's massive and on fire and no-one's had 119 00:05:45,280 --> 00:05:46,920 the time to teach you how to sail. 120 00:05:48,280 --> 00:05:50,599 It's literally life or death here. 121 00:05:50,600 --> 00:05:53,799 And you're constantly being splashed by bodily fluids. 122 00:05:53,800 --> 00:05:55,640 Not even the fun kind. 123 00:05:59,000 --> 00:06:02,159 But what other doctors can say they end up with twice the number of 124 00:06:02,160 --> 00:06:04,279 patients they started with? 125 00:06:04,280 --> 00:06:06,240 Beat that, geriatrics. 126 00:06:08,720 --> 00:06:10,599 Clothes bill means I'm... 127 00:06:10,600 --> 00:06:12,840 ..probably running my job at a loss, though. 128 00:06:25,760 --> 00:06:28,719 Ah, Mr Lockhart. Having fun there? 129 00:06:28,720 --> 00:06:32,119 I was just... Yeah, I'm not entirely convinced I want to know. 130 00:06:32,120 --> 00:06:34,199 I don't know if you heard, there was a massive 131 00:06:34,200 --> 00:06:35,799 cord prolapse before. 132 00:06:35,800 --> 00:06:38,559 Erm, crash section. Got the baby out in 90 seconds. 133 00:06:38,560 --> 00:06:41,159 I heard that you rocked up ten minutes late, 134 00:06:41,160 --> 00:06:43,719 nearly killed a patient in the maintenance lift, 135 00:06:43,720 --> 00:06:46,839 then did a Caesarean section in casualwear. 136 00:06:46,840 --> 00:06:48,719 It was more that I took a short cut. 137 00:06:48,720 --> 00:06:51,199 Doctors aren't meant to take short cuts, Adam. 138 00:06:51,200 --> 00:06:53,319 Remember when I asked you to be an acting registrar? 139 00:06:53,320 --> 00:06:56,559 Can you try acting like a bloody registrar? 140 00:06:56,560 --> 00:06:59,119 I'll be in my office if you need me, 141 00:06:59,120 --> 00:07:01,200 which I strongly suggest you won't. 142 00:07:03,560 --> 00:07:04,760 You've missed a bit. 143 00:07:14,840 --> 00:07:16,840 Mind out, please, mind out. 144 00:07:26,760 --> 00:07:30,159 It's really urgent! I know, petal, but I promise you 145 00:07:30,160 --> 00:07:31,879 the doctor won't be long. Pinkie promise? 146 00:07:31,880 --> 00:07:34,079 Pinkie promise with a little cherry on top. 147 00:07:34,080 --> 00:07:35,879 Oh! 148 00:07:35,880 --> 00:07:38,440 Why don't you head back to where you were sitting? 149 00:07:41,240 --> 00:07:44,039 Moany old trout. Morning, Ria. Morning, Dr Kay. 150 00:07:44,040 --> 00:07:46,159 Oh, there he is! Ward round, Trace? 151 00:07:46,160 --> 00:07:48,119 Can I ask you something personal, darling? 152 00:07:48,120 --> 00:07:49,959 Is it, "Why do you look like shit this morning?" 153 00:07:49,960 --> 00:07:51,319 I wasn't going to ask it like that. 154 00:07:51,320 --> 00:07:52,719 I slept in my car last night. 155 00:07:52,720 --> 00:07:56,479 Well, it must be hard maintaining a relationship, 156 00:07:56,480 --> 00:07:58,279 what, with your job... 157 00:07:58,280 --> 00:08:00,799 ..and your personality. 158 00:08:00,800 --> 00:08:03,359 Tracy's the head midwife on today. 159 00:08:03,360 --> 00:08:05,520 I'd let her sew up my sister's perineum... 160 00:08:06,640 --> 00:08:08,399 ..which sounds weird, now that I've said it, 161 00:08:08,400 --> 00:08:10,199 but it's actually the highest compliment I can give. 162 00:08:10,200 --> 00:08:12,679 Oh, remember to remove the thick, shiny layer on the outside. 163 00:08:12,680 --> 00:08:15,919 Ignore him. His girlfriend's come to her senses and dumped him. 164 00:08:15,920 --> 00:08:18,719 No-one's dumped anyone. But if you do want to smack him, 165 00:08:18,720 --> 00:08:20,519 I will turn a blind eye. 166 00:08:20,520 --> 00:08:22,679 Do you mind if we nip to Room 8 first? 167 00:08:22,680 --> 00:08:25,159 She's making pretty slow progress. 168 00:08:25,160 --> 00:08:28,199 Pop downstairs and review Mrs Buckstar quickly. 169 00:08:28,200 --> 00:08:30,639 Doctors speak a lot of code, so it's "epididymo-orchitis" 170 00:08:30,640 --> 00:08:32,839 rather than "gammy cock and balls". 171 00:08:32,840 --> 00:08:34,719 "Review Mrs Buckstar," "Go to Starbucks." 172 00:08:34,720 --> 00:08:36,159 Which ward is Mrs Buckstar in? 173 00:08:36,160 --> 00:08:38,639 He wants you to get him a fancy coffee without me knowing. 174 00:08:38,640 --> 00:08:41,200 Milk and one sugar for me, please. 175 00:08:48,560 --> 00:08:51,559 I'm in labour, Mother, not quadriplegic. 176 00:08:51,560 --> 00:08:54,399 Hi. I'm Adam, one of the doctors. 177 00:08:54,400 --> 00:08:56,959 I'm afraid I've got some bad news. 178 00:08:56,960 --> 00:08:58,600 You've spelt 'pavilion' wrong. 179 00:09:02,240 --> 00:09:03,799 Would you like a sweetie, dear? 180 00:09:03,800 --> 00:09:05,999 The doctor's not going to give me better care 181 00:09:06,000 --> 00:09:09,440 because you offer him a Murray Mint. In fairness, I might, actually. 182 00:09:13,200 --> 00:09:14,880 All right? 183 00:09:18,040 --> 00:09:20,199 You've got a little bit stuck at six centimetres, 184 00:09:20,200 --> 00:09:21,799 so I suggest we wang the dose up 185 00:09:21,800 --> 00:09:23,919 on the drip that's helping your contractions... 186 00:09:23,920 --> 00:09:25,679 Is "wang" a medical term? Sure is. 187 00:09:25,680 --> 00:09:27,840 And if that doesn't work, we'll, erm... 188 00:09:29,040 --> 00:09:33,719 Anna, let's put the Synto onto 84 and re-examine in four hours. 189 00:09:33,720 --> 00:09:35,639 It won't be me, actually. I'll be home by then. 190 00:09:35,640 --> 00:09:37,599 Really? Well, I've been here 15 hours. 191 00:09:37,600 --> 00:09:40,719 If I stay any longer, they'll start charging me council tax. 192 00:09:40,720 --> 00:09:42,879 Right. Don't worry, darling, 193 00:09:42,880 --> 00:09:45,879 I'll do it, so at least it'll be a familiar face. 194 00:09:45,880 --> 00:09:47,879 Could you do the examination instead, Doctor? 195 00:09:47,880 --> 00:09:51,119 It does make more sense for Tracy to do it. 196 00:09:51,120 --> 00:09:53,639 - Where did you train? - Would you like me to pop home 197 00:09:53,640 --> 00:09:55,159 and get my degree certificates? 198 00:09:55,160 --> 00:09:57,479 There's no way you could stay, is there? 199 00:09:57,480 --> 00:10:00,479 Erm, I'm not sure I like where this is going. 200 00:10:00,480 --> 00:10:02,079 You're not saying I can't choose who 201 00:10:02,080 --> 00:10:04,039 does intimate examinations on me, are you? 202 00:10:04,040 --> 00:10:06,599 I'm saying you won't be choosing based on the colour of their skin. 203 00:10:06,600 --> 00:10:10,799 Adam! What? When did anyone say anything about skin colour? 204 00:10:10,800 --> 00:10:12,319 It's called patient choice. 205 00:10:12,320 --> 00:10:14,759 It's important to have choice, like tonight I might... 206 00:10:14,760 --> 00:10:18,039 ..choose to order a pizza rather than firebomb a mosque. 207 00:10:18,040 --> 00:10:19,719 I think what Dr Kay meant to say... 208 00:10:19,720 --> 00:10:22,479 What I'm saying is, I know it's stressful being on labour ward, 209 00:10:22,480 --> 00:10:24,759 but anything more like this, and I will have to have you 210 00:10:24,760 --> 00:10:26,599 removed from the building. Is that understood? 211 00:10:26,600 --> 00:10:30,319 OK. OK, let's crack on, shall we? 212 00:10:30,320 --> 00:10:32,399 Wanker. 213 00:10:32,400 --> 00:10:34,159 That had better be a crossword answer. 214 00:10:34,160 --> 00:10:36,520 No, dear, she called you a wanker. 215 00:10:41,520 --> 00:10:43,679 What the hell was all that about? 216 00:10:43,680 --> 00:10:46,359 I guess white supremacists have babies, too. 217 00:10:46,360 --> 00:10:48,119 Not her. You. 218 00:10:48,120 --> 00:10:51,599 Me? I don't need a white knight to defend my honour. 219 00:10:51,600 --> 00:10:53,119 Hang on. I'm the registrar. 220 00:10:53,120 --> 00:10:54,719 Acting registrar. 221 00:10:54,720 --> 00:10:57,599 I'm the most senior doctor here. Until somebody more senior turns up. 222 00:10:57,600 --> 00:11:01,879 Well, I'm running this ward now, and it's up to me... No, I'm running 223 00:11:01,880 --> 00:11:04,039 this ward, young man, and I'm more than capable 224 00:11:04,040 --> 00:11:06,159 of handling myself, and the moment that I can't, 225 00:11:06,160 --> 00:11:07,799 I'll let somebody know, 226 00:11:07,800 --> 00:11:11,319 and I don't want to spoil the surprise - it won't be you. 227 00:11:11,320 --> 00:11:13,959 And don't tell the patients that you're kicking them out. 228 00:11:13,960 --> 00:11:16,239 This is the NHS, not your golf club. 229 00:11:16,240 --> 00:11:17,879 Which room are we kicking out? 230 00:11:17,880 --> 00:11:19,279 No, we're not kicking 231 00:11:19,280 --> 00:11:21,239 anybody out, Benilda. They're all in labour, 232 00:11:21,240 --> 00:11:23,639 so we thought we might wait until they had their babies. 233 00:11:23,640 --> 00:11:25,239 Well, get a move on. 234 00:11:25,240 --> 00:11:27,199 The hospital's on red alert for beds. 235 00:11:27,200 --> 00:11:29,359 We're actually more than halfway to black alert. 236 00:11:29,360 --> 00:11:31,920 So, like, dusky-merlot alert. 237 00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:36,199 Can you, er, go to gynae? 238 00:11:36,200 --> 00:11:37,919 The lady in bed 17's fit for home. 239 00:11:37,920 --> 00:11:40,519 I'm actually in the middle of a ward round. 240 00:11:40,520 --> 00:11:42,919 But, yeah, I mean, I'll find a moment. 241 00:11:42,920 --> 00:11:44,559 Before you do that, you'll need to 242 00:11:44,560 --> 00:11:46,559 fill out an incident form for Room 8. Hang on, 243 00:11:46,560 --> 00:11:49,000 I didn't have to do one for the cord prolapse. 244 00:11:59,640 --> 00:12:01,839 - Erika? - Third attendance this week 245 00:12:01,840 --> 00:12:04,359 with non-specific symptoms. 246 00:12:04,360 --> 00:12:07,359 OK, everybody, back to your jobs. We don't need the Polyphonic Spree. 247 00:12:07,360 --> 00:12:10,000 Shoo, shoo. Oh. Come on. 248 00:12:11,560 --> 00:12:13,839 Not you! 249 00:12:13,840 --> 00:12:15,960 Oh! Oh, God, I'm so sorry. 250 00:12:17,080 --> 00:12:20,199 Right, surprise me. What's the management? 251 00:12:20,200 --> 00:12:22,119 Right. Er... 252 00:12:22,120 --> 00:12:24,679 OK, well, I would, erm... 253 00:12:24,680 --> 00:12:26,479 ..check for a patent airway, 254 00:12:26,480 --> 00:12:28,119 er, then I would put her 255 00:12:28,120 --> 00:12:31,319 in the left lateral position, run high oxygen flow 256 00:12:31,320 --> 00:12:34,039 through a non-rebreather mask, erm, check for 257 00:12:34,040 --> 00:12:35,319 a pulse... 258 00:12:35,320 --> 00:12:37,560 So near and yet so shit. 259 00:12:39,160 --> 00:12:41,360 So, when people are really unconscious... 260 00:12:43,800 --> 00:12:45,840 ..their hands smash into their faces. 261 00:12:54,760 --> 00:12:56,799 Adam? 262 00:12:56,800 --> 00:12:58,000 Adam! 263 00:12:59,400 --> 00:13:00,719 Adam? 264 00:13:00,720 --> 00:13:02,639 Do you think I'm rubbish? 265 00:13:02,640 --> 00:13:04,919 Look, I wasn't great on my first week, either. 266 00:13:04,920 --> 00:13:06,880 I've been here two months! 267 00:13:10,040 --> 00:13:12,199 Two months? Well, I just haven't had a chance 268 00:13:12,200 --> 00:13:14,359 to do much hands-on stuff yet. 269 00:13:14,360 --> 00:13:15,999 How many babies have you delivered? 270 00:13:16,000 --> 00:13:17,519 Erm... 271 00:13:17,520 --> 00:13:19,479 No babies have needed delivery in two months? 272 00:13:19,480 --> 00:13:21,479 Everyone's always too busy to teach me. 273 00:13:21,480 --> 00:13:23,239 You just need to be less of a wallflower. 274 00:13:23,240 --> 00:13:24,800 It's dog eat dog in this place. 275 00:13:25,880 --> 00:13:27,120 And... 276 00:13:28,120 --> 00:13:29,520 ..the dogs eat wallflowers. 277 00:13:31,560 --> 00:13:34,159 Sorry, sorry, sorry. I've been elbow-deep in a patient, 278 00:13:34,160 --> 00:13:37,559 I've had an ethnostate in Room 8 and someone else playing dead. 279 00:13:37,560 --> 00:13:39,719 Oh, and I've got blood matted into my pubes. 280 00:13:39,720 --> 00:13:41,359 I love it when you talk dirty. 281 00:13:41,360 --> 00:13:42,959 Right, so, who did you say you were? 282 00:13:42,960 --> 00:13:44,639 My name's Harry. 283 00:13:44,640 --> 00:13:46,519 When you called my mother. 284 00:13:46,520 --> 00:13:48,320 I said I was your fuck buddy. 285 00:13:50,520 --> 00:13:51,879 I said I was your flatmate. 286 00:13:51,880 --> 00:13:53,759 But she knows we've only got one bedroom. 287 00:13:53,760 --> 00:13:56,199 Wild idea, but you know you could just... tell her about us? 288 00:13:56,200 --> 00:13:58,479 You don't know her. She'll turn you into stone, or something. 289 00:13:58,480 --> 00:14:01,279 Nah. Mums love me. It's like my superpower. 290 00:14:01,280 --> 00:14:03,119 How are we going to fake our own deaths, 291 00:14:03,120 --> 00:14:04,519 then, before Greg's stag do? 292 00:14:04,520 --> 00:14:06,399 I'm thinking avalanche, helicopter crash... 293 00:14:06,400 --> 00:14:08,999 Ah, it'll be a laugh. Carbon-monoxide poisoning? 294 00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:10,999 Shouldn't you pop along, 295 00:14:11,000 --> 00:14:13,399 seeing as you're the best man? Crap. I was meant to go to gynae. 296 00:14:13,400 --> 00:14:15,279 Sorry, call you later. Don't apologise. 297 00:14:15,280 --> 00:14:16,919 That's the longest call we've had in months. 298 00:14:16,920 --> 00:14:18,560 I was starting to get bored. 299 00:14:35,400 --> 00:14:36,799 Erm, good news, Mrs W. 300 00:14:36,800 --> 00:14:39,000 You are finally free to go home. 301 00:14:41,480 --> 00:14:43,520 Are you stupid? 302 00:14:44,840 --> 00:14:47,439 I was told you were good to go, but, yeah, you don't look great. 303 00:14:47,440 --> 00:14:48,999 Speak for yourself. 304 00:14:50,400 --> 00:14:52,879 Erm, must have been a bit of a mix-up. 305 00:14:52,880 --> 00:14:55,519 I'll come back later. I need to see someone else now. 306 00:14:55,520 --> 00:14:57,120 Hopefully a hairdresser. 307 00:15:09,840 --> 00:15:11,399 Dr Kay, you're needed in Room 4. 308 00:15:11,400 --> 00:15:12,800 Yes, I know... 309 00:15:29,840 --> 00:15:32,919 Never actually let the patient see the forceps. 310 00:15:32,920 --> 00:15:35,679 The only people happy with two-foot-long metal salad tongs 311 00:15:35,680 --> 00:15:37,879 inserted in their vaginas are people who aren't aware 312 00:15:37,880 --> 00:15:39,959 that there are two-foot-long metal salad tongs 313 00:15:39,960 --> 00:15:41,199 inserted in their vaginas. 314 00:15:41,200 --> 00:15:44,959 It's only a few more minutes. Shut up, Graham! 315 00:15:44,960 --> 00:15:47,079 And put your shirt back on. Just breathe. 316 00:15:47,080 --> 00:15:49,079 That's what's important. 317 00:15:49,080 --> 00:15:51,159 You're doing so good. 318 00:15:51,160 --> 00:15:53,479 You're doing so well. 319 00:15:53,480 --> 00:15:55,719 You're doing so well, my little soldier! 320 00:15:55,720 --> 00:15:58,640 Shut up, Graham. I'm going to play the song now. 321 00:15:59,960 --> 00:16:03,039 Seen one before? Yes... 322 00:16:03,040 --> 00:16:04,879 See one, do one, teach one. 323 00:16:04,880 --> 00:16:06,439 I don't like this song. 324 00:16:06,440 --> 00:16:07,840 Change the song, change the song. 325 00:16:09,760 --> 00:16:11,759 Wait for a contraction. 326 00:16:11,760 --> 00:16:13,039 And pull. 327 00:16:13,040 --> 00:16:14,639 You got to keep breathing. 328 00:16:15,960 --> 00:16:18,199 Just find your centre, baby. 329 00:16:18,200 --> 00:16:19,559 No stress. Graham... 330 00:16:21,960 --> 00:16:24,479 Dr Kay speaking. It's Greg. You've not answered 331 00:16:24,480 --> 00:16:26,719 any emails in four days. No-one even knows where we're meeting. 332 00:16:26,720 --> 00:16:30,119 Push, push, push, push, push! Pull as hard as you can! Now! 333 00:16:30,120 --> 00:16:31,839 Oh, God, tell me you're not having sex. 334 00:16:31,840 --> 00:16:34,239 Just on labour ward right now. I know it's traditional 335 00:16:34,240 --> 00:16:36,559 for the best man to humiliate the groom on his stag do, 336 00:16:36,560 --> 00:16:39,519 and traditionally that involves handcuffs and a sex worker... 337 00:16:39,520 --> 00:16:41,079 Just put some oomph into it. 338 00:16:41,080 --> 00:16:43,359 Welly's threatening to take over and drag us all to a strip club. 339 00:16:43,360 --> 00:16:45,239 No, no, no, we won't be going to... breast clinic. 340 00:16:45,240 --> 00:16:47,199 If this doesn't work, will we have to do a Caesarean? 341 00:16:47,200 --> 00:16:50,799 It will work. Erm, look, it's all going to be civilised, don't worry. 342 00:16:50,800 --> 00:16:53,279 You say, "Don't worry," but you'll understand why I am still worried. 343 00:16:53,280 --> 00:16:55,799 Tell everyone 8 o'clock upstairs at the Crown. 344 00:16:55,800 --> 00:16:58,159 I'll see you later. I really need to get back to this vagina. 345 00:16:58,160 --> 00:17:00,479 Yeah, well, you're definitely not having sex, then. 346 00:17:00,480 --> 00:17:02,279 You got to stay breathing, OK? 347 00:17:02,280 --> 00:17:04,159 That's it, that's it. You're doing brilliantly. 348 00:17:04,160 --> 00:17:05,879 Thanks. I was talking to the patient. 349 00:17:05,880 --> 00:17:08,839 Nice and slowly, nice and slowly. Don't let her tear. 350 00:17:08,840 --> 00:17:11,639 You're so beautiful! Graham, just stop. 351 00:17:11,640 --> 00:17:12,999 Nice and slowly, nice and... 352 00:17:13,000 --> 00:17:16,399 Dad, do you want to come down and see baby being born? 353 00:17:16,400 --> 00:17:19,520 Oh, my God, where's its face?! What's the matter with his face?! 354 00:17:21,680 --> 00:17:23,799 His face is fine. 355 00:17:23,800 --> 00:17:25,759 Just on the front of his head, not the back. 356 00:17:25,760 --> 00:17:28,040 Remember I said, "Don't let her tear"? 357 00:17:42,240 --> 00:17:45,160 Adam's a good name. 358 00:17:48,720 --> 00:17:50,639 You've got a bit of a tear going into the back passage. 359 00:17:50,640 --> 00:17:52,519 We'll get you round to theatre, 360 00:17:52,520 --> 00:17:55,279 and have that repaired nicely for you. 361 00:17:55,280 --> 00:17:57,280 Won't take more than an hour or so. 362 00:18:37,520 --> 00:18:40,159 Adam, I'm so sorry. I wish I could've sewn it up myself. 363 00:18:40,160 --> 00:18:42,239 I've just never actually done it... It's fine. 364 00:18:42,240 --> 00:18:44,279 Besides, my genitals were wondering why 365 00:18:44,280 --> 00:18:46,320 they hadn't been covered in blood for a few hours. 366 00:18:52,360 --> 00:18:54,119 Better do an incident form. 367 00:18:54,120 --> 00:18:55,999 How are we doing here, then? 368 00:18:56,000 --> 00:18:57,519 All under control, Mr Lockhart. 369 00:18:57,520 --> 00:18:59,279 Miracles never cease. Could you just have... 370 00:18:59,280 --> 00:19:01,439 I thought I told you to discharge that gynae patient. 371 00:19:01,440 --> 00:19:02,839 I see the miracles have ceased. 372 00:19:02,840 --> 00:19:04,199 No. But she's not even... 373 00:19:04,200 --> 00:19:06,839 Are my team causing you trouble, Ms Mendoza? 374 00:19:06,840 --> 00:19:08,319 We're full on labour ward. 375 00:19:08,320 --> 00:19:10,999 Post-nates, ante-nates, gynae. I don't know how we're supposed 376 00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:12,719 to admit anyone from A&E. 377 00:19:12,720 --> 00:19:15,559 We've been on red alert all day, and we're practically at black alert. 378 00:19:15,560 --> 00:19:18,679 Burgundy alert, then. 379 00:19:18,680 --> 00:19:20,879 I'm sure we can do something about that for you. 380 00:19:20,880 --> 00:19:23,199 Can't we, Dr Kay? Yeah, we could pull out 381 00:19:23,200 --> 00:19:25,439 the patient's drips, and chuck her out the window. 382 00:19:25,440 --> 00:19:26,999 I knew you'd think of something. 383 00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:29,439 Leave it with us. Can I help at all? 384 00:19:29,440 --> 00:19:31,439 You could pop down to the coffee shop. 385 00:19:31,440 --> 00:19:33,199 There's a vacancy for a barista. 386 00:19:33,200 --> 00:19:36,599 Shruti did her first forcep delivery earlier. 387 00:19:36,600 --> 00:19:37,999 Er, yeah, yeah. 388 00:19:38,000 --> 00:19:40,319 She had been in second stage for over an hour, and we... 389 00:19:40,320 --> 00:19:42,520 Very good. Walk with me, Adam. 390 00:19:44,840 --> 00:19:46,399 Quick story for you. 391 00:19:46,400 --> 00:19:48,519 So, there's this acting obstetric registrar, 392 00:19:48,520 --> 00:19:53,319 and he walks into a room and he calls his patient a Nazi. 393 00:19:53,320 --> 00:19:55,479 Oh, you're making it so much worse than it was. 394 00:19:55,480 --> 00:19:57,799 She was being racist to Tracy... Every mother and baby 395 00:19:57,800 --> 00:20:00,319 on this ward is relying on your good decisions, 396 00:20:00,320 --> 00:20:03,239 and your good judgment. Apologise to Tracy, 397 00:20:03,240 --> 00:20:04,999 apologise to the patient, 398 00:20:05,000 --> 00:20:06,720 and send some people home. 399 00:20:08,600 --> 00:20:09,919 Oh, and, Adam? 400 00:20:09,920 --> 00:20:11,799 Stop being shit. 401 00:20:26,440 --> 00:20:28,159 Rachel Glover? 402 00:20:28,160 --> 00:20:29,560 Kerry Salisbury? 403 00:20:31,200 --> 00:20:32,800 Caroline Morobeto? 404 00:21:04,480 --> 00:21:08,239 So, you've recovered from earlier. 405 00:21:08,240 --> 00:21:10,519 Oh, yes. Oh, God, sorry, Dr Adam. 406 00:21:10,520 --> 00:21:11,879 I don't know what came over me. 407 00:21:11,880 --> 00:21:13,799 So, remind me, how many weeks are you? 408 00:21:13,800 --> 00:21:16,119 Oh, God, I hate maths. 409 00:21:16,120 --> 00:21:19,519 I couldn't even tell you in months. Er... 410 00:21:19,520 --> 00:21:21,279 Erm, OK, let's think. 411 00:21:21,280 --> 00:21:24,239 So... Birthday's in June. 412 00:21:24,240 --> 00:21:25,440 I'll be 27... 413 00:21:27,360 --> 00:21:30,000 Well, it's got to be, like, 2,000 weeks? 414 00:21:31,360 --> 00:21:33,040 You're 25 weeks. 415 00:21:34,400 --> 00:21:36,239 Oh! 416 00:21:36,240 --> 00:21:37,639 You mean the baby. 417 00:21:40,160 --> 00:21:43,919 So, erm, what's the... problem? 418 00:21:43,920 --> 00:21:48,159 Well, I woke up this morning with a headache, 419 00:21:48,160 --> 00:21:52,199 and my tongue is just, like, totally covered in spots. 420 00:21:52,200 --> 00:21:54,000 Right. Let's have a look. 421 00:21:58,320 --> 00:22:00,040 OK. 422 00:22:02,680 --> 00:22:06,479 I'm afraid that what you have is known as... 423 00:22:06,480 --> 00:22:08,280 ..taste buds. 424 00:22:10,720 --> 00:22:13,240 Oh. 425 00:22:16,200 --> 00:22:18,439 So, is there someone at home we can call 426 00:22:18,440 --> 00:22:20,199 to come and collect you, 427 00:22:20,200 --> 00:22:22,279 or do you live here now? 428 00:22:22,280 --> 00:22:24,760 Oh, God, no, who'd want to live with me? 429 00:22:28,800 --> 00:22:30,320 Right. 430 00:22:35,320 --> 00:22:38,279 Adam, that lady you just saw, her blood pressure's a bit high. 431 00:22:38,280 --> 00:22:40,919 Do you want me to send her for some bloods? Just send her home. 432 00:22:40,920 --> 00:22:44,120 No, wait. Erm, yes, do the bloods. 433 00:22:45,520 --> 00:22:47,080 Yep? 434 00:22:48,440 --> 00:22:50,120 What's the trace like? 435 00:22:52,600 --> 00:22:54,840 Isn't the evening registrar here yet? 436 00:22:57,400 --> 00:22:59,559 OK. Fine. 437 00:22:59,560 --> 00:23:01,799 Right, we're doing a Caesarean for Room 8. 438 00:23:01,800 --> 00:23:04,639 Dr Adam? Dr Adam, sorry, sorry, I meant to say. 439 00:23:04,640 --> 00:23:06,959 My teeth have become a bit itchy. 440 00:23:06,960 --> 00:23:08,440 Send her home. 441 00:23:09,520 --> 00:23:11,599 Don't ask to do it. I'm tired. 442 00:23:11,600 --> 00:23:13,199 I need to be gone ten minutes ago. 443 00:23:13,200 --> 00:23:14,839 Erm, so, we're all good to go. 444 00:23:14,840 --> 00:23:16,399 We'll have baby out in five minutes, 445 00:23:16,400 --> 00:23:19,919 and may I just say, I misspoke before 446 00:23:19,920 --> 00:23:23,119 and I'm very sorry. All water under the bridge. 447 00:23:23,120 --> 00:23:25,119 But just checking it will be you doing this operation 448 00:23:25,120 --> 00:23:26,960 and nobody else. 449 00:23:28,880 --> 00:23:30,599 Yes. 450 00:23:30,600 --> 00:23:32,240 Yes, it will. Yeah. 451 00:23:37,920 --> 00:23:41,279 Actually, fuck it. You've got to learn some time. You're up. 452 00:23:41,280 --> 00:23:43,159 Come on, you've seen one. Y-Yeah... 453 00:23:43,160 --> 00:23:45,959 So you know the routine. See one, fuck one up, teach one. 454 00:23:45,960 --> 00:23:48,759 Really? Thank you. 455 00:23:48,760 --> 00:23:51,360 Are you sure? Not especially. Come on. 456 00:23:59,680 --> 00:24:01,200 Are you happy? 457 00:24:03,560 --> 00:24:05,120 Right, come on. 458 00:24:07,320 --> 00:24:09,359 This it? Yeah. Hurry up, please, 459 00:24:09,360 --> 00:24:11,800 I think the anaesthetist's retiring next week. 460 00:24:16,640 --> 00:24:18,439 Adam? Mm? 461 00:24:18,440 --> 00:24:20,919 Stretch it. Come on. Harder than that. 462 00:24:20,920 --> 00:24:22,800 Right, through the peritoneum, then. 463 00:24:24,840 --> 00:24:27,439 Pop your finger in. You're not going to damage anything. 464 00:24:27,440 --> 00:24:29,599 OK. 465 00:24:29,600 --> 00:24:31,040 Oh! 466 00:24:34,560 --> 00:24:36,999 Adam? Adam? 467 00:24:37,000 --> 00:24:39,679 Er, yeah, OK, good. Great. So, you're going to make 468 00:24:39,680 --> 00:24:42,239 a U-shape in the lower segment of the uterus, 469 00:24:42,240 --> 00:24:44,239 and then you're going to extend it with your fingers. 470 00:24:44,240 --> 00:24:45,839 What if there isn't a lower segment? 471 00:24:45,840 --> 00:24:48,079 You know, like if it's before 32 weeks. 472 00:24:48,080 --> 00:24:50,279 Yeah, we usually save the Q&A session for afterwards. 473 00:24:50,280 --> 00:24:52,959 It would just be a horrible, bloody mess. Come on, get on with it. 474 00:24:52,960 --> 00:24:54,839 Is that...? Good. 475 00:24:54,840 --> 00:24:56,359 Now what? 476 00:24:56,360 --> 00:24:58,559 I think even you can guess what happens next. Come on. 477 00:24:58,560 --> 00:25:00,239 That's it. 478 00:25:00,240 --> 00:25:02,280 Just guide the head out. It's coming. 479 00:25:03,800 --> 00:25:05,280 OK. 480 00:25:06,840 --> 00:25:08,240 That's it. 481 00:25:09,960 --> 00:25:12,679 One baby coming up... 482 00:25:17,720 --> 00:25:19,959 No, get her off me. I'm not having a Paki 483 00:25:19,960 --> 00:25:22,039 delivering my baby! Get her off me! 484 00:25:22,040 --> 00:25:25,519 Stop touching it! You promised that you would do it! 485 00:25:25,520 --> 00:25:28,159 Excuse me, get me out of this! Take this! 486 00:25:28,160 --> 00:25:29,879 What is this? Get this off me! 487 00:25:29,880 --> 00:25:32,200 Adolf's a good name. Mum, will you do something?! 488 00:25:34,520 --> 00:25:35,960 You did really well. 489 00:25:37,240 --> 00:25:39,560 One Caesarean down, 8,000 to go. 490 00:25:40,760 --> 00:25:43,359 To be fair, they don't normally end like that. 491 00:25:43,360 --> 00:25:46,680 Erm, write up the notes and mention that I closed the skin. 492 00:25:50,160 --> 00:25:52,720 Oh, gosh, isn't he wonderful? 493 00:26:06,080 --> 00:26:07,720 Oh, for... 494 00:26:13,680 --> 00:26:15,159 Cancellations hotline. 495 00:26:15,160 --> 00:26:17,759 Press 1 for you need to stay at work, leaving me to make 496 00:26:17,760 --> 00:26:21,919 small talk with 20 public-school dickheads I barely know. 497 00:26:21,920 --> 00:26:25,039 That's unfair. There's only 15 of them. 498 00:26:25,040 --> 00:26:26,479 And I'm just leaving now. 499 00:26:26,480 --> 00:26:29,759 No way! Can you bring a change of clothes, please? 500 00:26:29,760 --> 00:26:32,199 Yeah. Anything in particular? 501 00:26:32,200 --> 00:26:33,399 Erm, something smart-casual 502 00:26:33,400 --> 00:26:36,199 and not totally encrusted with a stranger's blood? 503 00:26:36,200 --> 00:26:38,199 Hula skirt and feather boa it is, then. 504 00:26:38,200 --> 00:26:40,080 See you in a bit. 505 00:26:44,040 --> 00:26:45,919 You can't help being ill, darling. 506 00:26:45,920 --> 00:26:48,279 I'll just get somebody else to pick her up. 507 00:26:48,280 --> 00:26:51,359 Right. Bye-bye. 508 00:26:51,360 --> 00:26:53,199 Er, Adam? 509 00:26:53,200 --> 00:26:55,159 I saw what you did to that dolphin. 510 00:26:55,160 --> 00:26:57,239 A gentleman never discusses a lady's blowhole. 511 00:26:57,240 --> 00:26:59,559 Do you want my advice, Adam? Erm, not really. 512 00:26:59,560 --> 00:27:01,199 That is exactly your problem. 513 00:27:01,200 --> 00:27:03,160 It was pretty funny, though, right? 514 00:28:04,960 --> 00:28:06,679 It's my second-favourite doctor! 515 00:28:06,680 --> 00:28:07,919 Who's number one? 516 00:28:07,920 --> 00:28:09,440 David Tennant. First series. 517 00:28:13,040 --> 00:28:15,599 How was work? Fine, thanks. Who are they? 518 00:28:15,600 --> 00:28:17,959 No idea, but they're better craic than your mates upstairs. 519 00:28:17,960 --> 00:28:19,279 Oh, come on. 520 00:28:19,280 --> 00:28:21,439 I'm sure you'll find something in common with them. 521 00:28:21,440 --> 00:28:24,119 There you go. See? Wearing the same T-shirt. 522 00:28:24,120 --> 00:28:26,519 Some guy called... Welly brought them. 523 00:28:26,520 --> 00:28:29,120 Well, they're not too terrible, considering. 524 00:28:32,680 --> 00:28:34,800 Shall we just do this? Come on. 525 00:28:41,840 --> 00:28:44,559 Ah! 7:58. There you go. 526 00:28:44,560 --> 00:28:47,799 I knew you wouldn't let me down. 527 00:28:47,800 --> 00:28:51,519 No, you didn't. Yeah, fine. May have lost a small bet. 528 00:28:51,520 --> 00:28:53,919 Nightmare! This place doesn't do Jagerbombs! 529 00:28:53,920 --> 00:28:55,279 Whatever will we do? 530 00:28:55,280 --> 00:28:58,520 Adster! Welly. Don't do that. 531 00:28:59,960 --> 00:29:03,639 Where's your T-shirt? Yeah, Adster, where's your T-shirt? 532 00:29:03,640 --> 00:29:05,280 Put it on. 533 00:29:07,080 --> 00:29:08,799 Put it on. 534 00:29:08,800 --> 00:29:15,559 Put it on, put it on, put it on, put it on! 535 00:29:15,560 --> 00:29:18,079 Yes! And as for you... 536 00:29:18,080 --> 00:29:20,439 ..one pint of gin. 537 00:29:20,440 --> 00:29:21,839 No, I'm not going to drink that. 538 00:29:21,840 --> 00:29:24,079 Well, you will be, because it's tradi-ti-on. How can it be 539 00:29:24,080 --> 00:29:25,799 a tradition? I've never got married before. 540 00:29:25,800 --> 00:29:28,439 Right, I need a drink. Is this my stuff? 541 00:29:28,440 --> 00:29:30,879 So, did your mum call? She left a voicemail. 542 00:29:30,880 --> 00:29:32,879 Ah. And you didn't listen. 543 00:29:32,880 --> 00:29:35,880 No. I'm changing my number and moving to Venezuela. 544 00:29:37,560 --> 00:29:38,919 You done there? 545 00:29:40,440 --> 00:29:42,279 Right, come on, what do you want? 546 00:29:42,280 --> 00:29:45,999 I think 12 litres of vodka Red Bull should probably do it. 547 00:29:46,000 --> 00:29:48,559 Er, can I get a bottle of Sauvignon Blanc and... 548 00:29:50,200 --> 00:29:52,919 ..a rum and Coke, please? This'll be Jakesy. 549 00:29:52,920 --> 00:29:54,919 He's probably gone to Poland by mistake. Hello? 550 00:29:54,920 --> 00:29:57,759 Kay. Mr Lockhart! I'm just in a... 551 00:29:57,760 --> 00:29:59,399 Pint of gin, pint of gin! 552 00:29:59,400 --> 00:30:01,119 ..supermarket. 553 00:30:01,120 --> 00:30:03,399 Sorry, Mr Lockhart, how can I help? 554 00:30:03,400 --> 00:30:06,239 Er, listen, the locum registrar 555 00:30:06,240 --> 00:30:08,720 hasn't turned up for the night shift. 556 00:30:09,800 --> 00:30:12,079 Erm... Who's the senior reg? 557 00:30:12,080 --> 00:30:15,040 Er, I don't think he'd get here from Sydney in time. 558 00:30:16,160 --> 00:30:18,919 Well, do say if you've got something more important on. 559 00:30:18,920 --> 00:30:21,559 Erm, no. No, no, no. Erm... 560 00:30:21,560 --> 00:30:23,119 No, I can do it. 561 00:30:23,120 --> 00:30:24,880 Will the missus understand? 562 00:30:29,040 --> 00:30:31,559 She'll be fine with it. Good man. Bye! 563 00:30:38,560 --> 00:30:41,039 How long are you going to be? A couple of hours? 564 00:30:41,040 --> 00:30:43,840 12. I'm so sorry. And there's no-one else who could...? 565 00:30:46,400 --> 00:30:48,920 I'm sorry. It's really crap for you. 566 00:30:52,400 --> 00:30:56,159 You don't have to stay here, obviously. I'll be grand. 567 00:30:56,160 --> 00:30:58,120 I've never had a... pint of gin before. 568 00:31:00,280 --> 00:31:02,719 Just a couple more years, then I'll be a consultant, 569 00:31:02,720 --> 00:31:05,119 and it'll just be me, you and an Aston Martin. 570 00:31:05,120 --> 00:31:08,279 It would be nice to live somewhere a bit more spacious. 571 00:31:08,280 --> 00:31:10,279 We can shower in the glove compartment. 572 00:31:10,280 --> 00:31:12,160 Right, go on. You've got some babies to deliver. 573 00:31:15,000 --> 00:31:17,599 You should have gone along with my avalanche idea. 574 00:31:17,600 --> 00:31:20,359 OK, your first best-manly duty is to rescue my dad. 575 00:31:20,360 --> 00:31:23,279 Welly's trying to get him to drink a shoe full of sambuca. 576 00:31:23,280 --> 00:31:25,240 Shoe-ca! Shoe-ca! 577 00:31:27,320 --> 00:31:29,999 You're going to hate me. 578 00:31:30,000 --> 00:31:32,679 There's a... staffing emergency at the hospital. 579 00:31:32,680 --> 00:31:34,359 There's no doctors on labour ward. 580 00:31:34,360 --> 00:31:38,320 No. So I have to go back in. Drink this. Then you can't go in. 581 00:31:40,040 --> 00:31:42,999 I can't. OK, give me one good reason. 582 00:31:43,000 --> 00:31:44,439 Er... 583 00:31:44,440 --> 00:31:47,480 Er, because I, erm... Because you'd rather be at work. 584 00:31:48,640 --> 00:31:50,360 Yeah, have a good night, mate. 585 00:31:58,360 --> 00:32:00,040 Fuck's sake! 586 00:32:44,440 --> 00:32:46,919 Do you want the good news or the bad news? 587 00:32:46,920 --> 00:32:49,359 Erm, the good. Oh, I was worried you'd say that. 588 00:32:49,360 --> 00:32:51,159 It's all bad, I'm afraid. 589 00:32:51,160 --> 00:32:52,919 The wards are stuffed to the gills, 590 00:32:52,920 --> 00:32:56,559 there's no SHO, and the midwife in charge is Tracy. 591 00:32:56,560 --> 00:32:58,719 Well, she was working during the day. The other one. 592 00:32:58,720 --> 00:33:01,919 "Non-Reassuring Trace." 593 00:33:01,920 --> 00:33:03,719 Right, I'm off home. But call me whenever. 594 00:33:03,720 --> 00:33:05,600 I won't. Good man. 595 00:33:07,480 --> 00:33:10,119 You're very intent on showing me your penis today. 596 00:33:10,120 --> 00:33:12,159 They need to increase the credits 597 00:33:12,160 --> 00:33:14,399 on the scrub machine. You can practically tell 598 00:33:14,400 --> 00:33:16,960 who did your circumcision. Made a right meal of it. 599 00:33:21,440 --> 00:33:23,200 Keep going. 600 00:33:29,360 --> 00:33:32,239 Hi, Trace. How can I help? Oh, Doctor, thank God you're here. 601 00:33:32,240 --> 00:33:34,239 Can you see Room 11 for me? 602 00:33:34,240 --> 00:33:36,719 I'm desperately worried about her. 603 00:33:36,720 --> 00:33:39,119 Quick as you can. 604 00:34:02,520 --> 00:34:04,480 Yeah. Yeah, it was amazing. 605 00:34:05,800 --> 00:34:09,119 No, I didn't take a photo! It's someone else's baby! 606 00:34:09,120 --> 00:34:11,799 Yeah, I know, Mum said the exact same thing. 607 00:34:11,800 --> 00:34:14,119 Actually, I'm not going to make it home this weekend, 608 00:34:14,120 --> 00:34:16,879 but, erm... 609 00:34:16,880 --> 00:34:20,519 Mm-hm. Yeah, erm, I love you, too. OK. Bye. 610 00:34:20,520 --> 00:34:21,879 Bye. 611 00:34:21,880 --> 00:34:23,839 What the hell are you still doing here? 612 00:34:23,840 --> 00:34:26,439 Don't you have a depressing flat to go back to? 613 00:34:26,440 --> 00:34:28,719 The incident forms are longer than you think. 614 00:34:28,720 --> 00:34:30,359 Just go home. 615 00:34:30,360 --> 00:34:32,879 I'll do yours when I do mine. 616 00:34:32,880 --> 00:34:34,999 This is yours. Oh, no way! 617 00:34:36,520 --> 00:34:39,279 I wouldn't break a sweat. Non-Reassuring-Tracey's on. 618 00:34:39,280 --> 00:34:41,119 The patient's probably farted. 619 00:34:47,480 --> 00:34:49,279 25 weeks. First baby. 620 00:34:49,280 --> 00:34:52,119 Blood pressure's through the roof. 621 00:34:52,120 --> 00:34:54,999 Grade one Caesarean section. 622 00:34:55,000 --> 00:34:56,839 Get anaesthetics round to theatres now. 623 00:34:56,840 --> 00:34:59,599 Tell paeds it's a 25-weeker with placental abruption. 624 00:34:59,600 --> 00:35:01,439 Severe pre-eclampsia. 625 00:35:01,440 --> 00:35:03,479 Turns out I probably shouldn't have sent her home. 626 00:35:03,480 --> 00:35:06,519 Erika, listen. I'm very worried about your baby. 627 00:35:06,520 --> 00:35:08,839 Placenta's coming away. I need to deliver you immediately 628 00:35:08,840 --> 00:35:10,639 to save baby's life. 629 00:35:10,640 --> 00:35:13,559 It's too early! I'm going to perform a Caesarean section. 630 00:35:13,560 --> 00:35:15,920 Do you understand? 631 00:35:18,880 --> 00:35:20,479 Do you want your consultant in? 632 00:35:20,480 --> 00:35:22,240 I've got this, thanks, Tracy. 633 00:35:23,320 --> 00:35:26,279 Is my sister here? We've called her, and she'll be here in time 634 00:35:26,280 --> 00:35:28,799 to say hello to your baby. Or goodbye. 635 00:35:28,800 --> 00:35:32,599 Why don't you count down from 20 for me? 636 00:35:32,600 --> 00:35:35,119 20, 19... 18... 637 00:35:35,120 --> 00:35:36,720 Come on. 638 00:35:38,360 --> 00:35:40,639 Are you happy? Ready when you are. 639 00:35:40,640 --> 00:35:43,519 Adam, have you done a 25-week Caesarean before? No. 640 00:35:43,520 --> 00:35:45,080 I've seen one. 641 00:35:57,320 --> 00:35:59,880 Pull. Quick. And retractor in. 642 00:36:47,320 --> 00:36:48,519 Adam? 643 00:36:48,520 --> 00:36:51,319 Yeah, chest movement. Adam? 644 00:36:51,320 --> 00:36:54,399 Adam! Er, sorry. Swabs, please. 645 00:36:54,400 --> 00:36:56,240 Let's start the suction. 646 00:37:03,320 --> 00:37:05,200 Oh, my God. 647 00:37:07,280 --> 00:37:09,279 Come on. Shit. 648 00:37:09,280 --> 00:37:12,079 Pressures aren't great here. What's the blood loss like? 649 00:37:12,080 --> 00:37:13,919 Er, it's a litre, a litre-and-a-half. 650 00:37:13,920 --> 00:37:16,039 Can you bleep the on-call haematologist? 651 00:37:16,040 --> 00:37:18,839 I'm going to need some more blood products. 652 00:37:18,840 --> 00:37:21,560 Find out who's the anaesthetic consultant. 653 00:37:22,760 --> 00:37:24,520 More swabs. 654 00:37:29,400 --> 00:37:31,799 I-I can't see anything. It's too thick to stitch. 655 00:37:31,800 --> 00:37:34,479 So much blood. Shit, I can't... 656 00:37:34,480 --> 00:37:36,319 I... I can't get it under... 657 00:37:36,320 --> 00:37:37,759 Fuck! 658 00:37:37,760 --> 00:37:40,919 This is insane. I can't... I can't see anything. Shit! 659 00:37:40,920 --> 00:37:42,519 Fuck! Adam... 660 00:37:42,520 --> 00:37:44,199 ..you can do this. 661 00:37:44,200 --> 00:37:45,760 I can't. I can't do this. 662 00:37:46,840 --> 00:37:49,399 This woman's going to die, and it's my fault. 663 00:37:49,400 --> 00:37:51,280 Shall we get Mr Lockhart in? 664 00:37:55,560 --> 00:37:58,519 Yeah. Yeah, please. Tracy, will you call Mr Lockhart 665 00:37:58,520 --> 00:38:00,039 and ask him to come in, please? 666 00:38:00,040 --> 00:38:03,120 I called him before you started. Why did you do that? I... 667 00:38:04,640 --> 00:38:06,120 Thank you. 668 00:38:55,840 --> 00:38:57,440 I'm really sorry. 669 00:39:04,040 --> 00:39:06,039 It was really busy, 670 00:39:06,040 --> 00:39:08,679 and I genuinely thought that she was crying wolf. 671 00:39:08,680 --> 00:39:11,759 She was crying severe early-onset pre-eclampsia, 672 00:39:11,760 --> 00:39:15,479 which you'd have known if you'd done so much as a blood test. 673 00:39:15,480 --> 00:39:18,079 And then, for some reason, you attempted an operation 674 00:39:18,080 --> 00:39:20,120 any consultant would struggle with. 675 00:39:21,600 --> 00:39:24,079 Oh, you can buy Tracy a box of chocolates, by the way, 676 00:39:24,080 --> 00:39:25,720 for calling me in. 677 00:39:28,920 --> 00:39:31,320 Can I just say...? No! 678 00:39:33,880 --> 00:39:39,160 Amend your entry from when you first saw this patient this afternoon. 679 00:39:41,000 --> 00:39:43,279 Write that you discussed with me over the phone, 680 00:39:43,280 --> 00:39:46,359 and that I advised you to send her home. 681 00:39:46,360 --> 00:39:48,279 What? 682 00:39:48,280 --> 00:39:50,439 No, you don't have to do that. 683 00:39:50,440 --> 00:39:52,520 Well, you didn't have to come in tonight. 684 00:39:55,240 --> 00:39:56,760 I did. Yeah, you did. 685 00:40:10,200 --> 00:40:12,679 Hi. Um... 686 00:40:12,680 --> 00:40:14,560 ..something to keep you going. 687 00:41:46,400 --> 00:41:50,240 Hi. I'm one of the obstetric, erm, registrars. 688 00:41:51,200 --> 00:41:53,519 Are you lost? 689 00:41:53,520 --> 00:41:55,559 Erm, I'm looking for... 690 00:41:55,560 --> 00:41:57,599 ..baby Van Hegan. The 25-weeker. 691 00:41:57,600 --> 00:42:00,480 Ah! Are you the one who, er...? 692 00:42:04,120 --> 00:42:07,160 Well, you're not going to knock over the incubator, are you? 693 00:42:08,480 --> 00:42:09,840 Bed 5. 694 00:42:38,440 --> 00:42:40,079 I'm really sorry. 695 00:42:40,080 --> 00:42:44,000 I was... really tired, and I just wanted to get home. 696 00:42:45,800 --> 00:42:48,440 And... this place is insane. 697 00:42:49,800 --> 00:42:51,599 And... 698 00:42:51,600 --> 00:42:53,119 ..I fucked up. 699 00:42:53,120 --> 00:42:55,319 I mucked up. 700 00:42:55,320 --> 00:42:57,599 Sorry. 701 00:42:57,600 --> 00:42:59,360 I tried my best. 702 00:43:03,040 --> 00:43:05,960 Just promise me you'll have a normal head scan. 703 00:43:24,800 --> 00:43:26,920 Enjoy your last night of pussy. 53425

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