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1
00:56:31,000 --> 00:56:32,600
I like cardio.
2
00:56:33,360 --> 00:56:34,840
That's why I ran away
and came here.
3
00:56:35,280 --> 00:56:37,160
New friends. A new life.
4
00:56:37,240 --> 00:56:38,920
But no matter how far we run,
5
00:56:39,720 --> 00:56:41,880
can we really run away
from ourselves?
6
00:56:58,040 --> 00:56:58,600
Hi!
7
00:57:00,120 --> 00:57:02,720
Oh...sa...ka...
8
00:57:03,080 --> 00:57:04,000
Osaka.
9
00:57:04,440 --> 00:57:05,680
You don't look Japanese.
10
00:57:05,760 --> 00:57:06,440
No, no...
11
00:57:06,840 --> 00:57:07,560
It's Umang.
12
00:57:07,640 --> 00:57:08,880
I know, Umang.
13
00:57:09,400 --> 00:57:11,360
We've met before.
At the gym. Remember?
14
00:57:11,720 --> 00:57:12,320
Come in.
15
00:57:15,440 --> 00:57:15,800
This way.
16
00:57:15,880 --> 00:57:18,680
This film is very
important for my career.
17
00:57:18,760 --> 00:57:20,680
I mean, a woman reaches
a certain age...
18
00:57:20,760 --> 00:57:22,440
...and the movies just dry up.
19
00:57:22,520 --> 00:57:24,240
You know,
all these 50 year old film stars...
20
00:57:24,320 --> 00:57:26,680
...they all want 22 year old heroines.
21
00:57:27,040 --> 00:57:27,640
So...
22
00:57:28,240 --> 00:57:29,360
I'm producing this film.
23
00:57:29,840 --> 00:57:32,880
It's about an ordinary
middle class Indian girl...
24
00:57:32,960 --> 00:57:37,440
...who goes on to becoming
India's first MMA World Champion.
25
00:57:37,520 --> 00:57:38,640
Against all odds!
26
00:57:39,560 --> 00:57:40,200
So...
27
00:57:40,280 --> 00:57:41,840
I have to look like
I can fuckin' fight!
28
00:57:42,160 --> 00:57:44,680
And when I walked into
the gym and saw you bench a 100...
29
00:57:45,400 --> 00:57:46,280
...I knew right away...
30
00:57:46,840 --> 00:57:49,000
...that only you can train me.
31
00:57:50,040 --> 00:57:51,920
So... am I being too ambitious?
32
00:57:52,560 --> 00:57:53,400
No...possible...
33
00:57:53,480 --> 00:57:54,640
Not possible?
34
00:57:54,960 --> 00:57:56,040
Ah! Shit!
35
00:57:56,120 --> 00:57:57,200
I knew it wouldn't be possible.
36
00:57:57,280 --> 00:57:58,880
No, no, I meant...
37
00:57:58,960 --> 00:57:59,720
...of course it's possible.
38
00:57:59,800 --> 00:58:01,280
Why isn't it possible?
Anything is possible!
39
00:58:01,360 --> 00:58:02,880
I mean take the word
'impossible' for instance.
40
00:58:02,960 --> 00:58:05,160
It has 'I-M-POSSIBLE' hidden in it.
41
00:58:05,240 --> 00:58:07,640
#sweatisfatcrying #knowhowtogohome
42
00:58:07,720 --> 00:58:09,000
#liftallday
43
00:58:09,080 --> 00:58:12,800
Just have a little faith and
it's going to be absolutely...
44
00:58:13,200 --> 00:58:14,320
Oh!
45
00:58:16,120 --> 00:58:17,120
Oh!
46
00:58:18,200 --> 00:58:20,920
Did you smoke up
before coming here?
47
00:58:21,000 --> 00:58:21,720
No.
48
00:58:22,600 --> 00:58:23,320
Sorry...
49
00:58:31,640 --> 00:58:33,240
I'm such an ass!
50
00:58:40,360 --> 00:58:42,040
Don't look at me like that...
51
00:58:42,600 --> 00:58:44,680
Are you going to now
tax me for looking at you?
52
00:58:44,760 --> 00:58:46,560
Umi, we were young and
naïve back then.
53
00:58:47,040 --> 00:58:47,880
Naïve...
54
00:58:48,440 --> 00:58:49,880
I'm now 24...
55
00:58:50,520 --> 00:58:52,040
I want to get married...
56
00:58:52,120 --> 00:58:53,440
Fast for my husband...
57
00:58:53,520 --> 00:58:54,520
I want kids...
58
00:58:55,600 --> 00:58:56,680
Just not with me.
59
00:58:58,880 --> 00:59:00,160
Haven't you studied biology?
60
00:59:00,280 --> 00:59:01,800
When you're with me,
61
00:59:01,880 --> 00:59:03,520
I understand biology a little better.
62
00:59:05,080 --> 00:59:08,320
Umi, the sooner you understand this,
the better.
63
00:59:08,760 --> 00:59:10,120
We have no future together.
64
00:59:11,000 --> 00:59:11,720
Why?
65
00:59:12,160 --> 00:59:13,000
Who says so?
66
00:59:14,440 --> 00:59:17,320
Because only a privileged
few have the right to fall in love.
67
00:59:17,800 --> 00:59:19,960
The rest of us have to get married.
68
00:59:20,680 --> 00:59:23,080
'We have to do this,
we have to be responsible...'
69
00:59:23,160 --> 00:59:25,760
Since when have you started
wallowing in this kind of nonsense?
70
00:59:25,840 --> 00:59:28,680
C'mon, let's run
away to Mumbai together!
71
00:59:30,120 --> 00:59:32,000
What shenanigans
are the two of you up to?
72
00:59:33,120 --> 00:59:34,680
We were just doing some cardio.
73
00:59:34,760 --> 00:59:36,600
Trying to get some
running practice going.
74
00:59:37,520 --> 00:59:39,960
Pinky, you're looking
so pretty in this pink outfit.
75
00:59:40,480 --> 00:59:42,600
I'm starving.
Make me something to eat...
76
00:59:42,680 --> 00:59:43,880
Of course, in a minute.
77
00:59:45,160 --> 00:59:46,040
And you...
78
00:59:46,640 --> 00:59:48,880
...go get me some water.
79
00:59:49,320 --> 00:59:51,760
How about you jump in
a well and drown yourself!
80
00:59:51,840 --> 00:59:53,760
Who's going to marry you
if you keep up this attitude?
81
00:59:54,080 --> 00:59:56,120
Unlike you,
I'm not desperate to get married.
82
00:59:57,760 --> 00:59:58,920
Insolent!
83
01:00:03,080 --> 01:00:05,320
How do you even kiss him?
84
01:00:05,720 --> 01:00:06,880
Doesn't he make you want to puke?
85
01:00:07,800 --> 01:00:08,800
He's your brother...
86
01:00:09,400 --> 01:00:10,600
...for me, just a husband.
87
01:01:03,680 --> 01:01:05,800
I told you, you've put on
weight Siddhi.
88
01:01:06,240 --> 01:01:07,200
What is this?
89
01:01:08,040 --> 01:01:09,720
Deepika, what are we
going to do with this girl?
90
01:01:09,800 --> 01:01:10,760
Sneha, relax.
91
01:01:11,320 --> 01:01:13,040
I've worked on such cases before.
92
01:01:13,360 --> 01:01:15,440
I had a client who's lost 40 kilos.
93
01:01:16,200 --> 01:01:18,240
But you know my chums are
going to start in a few days...
94
01:01:18,360 --> 01:01:20,440
So maybe it's the water retention...
-Siddhi, please.
95
01:01:20,800 --> 01:01:23,360
This is not water retention.
96
01:01:24,160 --> 01:01:26,360
You know, we have a community
temple in New Jersey...
97
01:01:26,480 --> 01:01:28,520
We have a matchmaker there,
Mrs. Desai.
98
01:01:29,000 --> 01:01:30,920
I sent her Siddhi's portfolio.
99
01:01:31,800 --> 01:01:34,320
You know, the bitch turned
around and told me...
100
01:01:34,360 --> 01:01:36,240
...once Siddhi is a size zero,
101
01:01:36,320 --> 01:01:38,760
send me her new portfolio.
102
01:01:39,520 --> 01:01:40,520
Can you imagine?
103
01:01:41,240 --> 01:01:43,720
Okay Siddhi,
we'll put you on the PC plan.
104
01:01:43,800 --> 01:01:45,240
Priyanka Chopra's diet plan?
105
01:01:45,320 --> 01:01:45,920
No.
106
01:01:46,040 --> 01:01:46,760
PC.
107
01:01:49,520 --> 01:01:50,360
Portion Control.
108
01:01:50,800 --> 01:01:53,320
From now, you will eat
as much in quantity...
109
01:01:53,360 --> 01:01:55,200
...and in variety as a
10 month baby.
110
01:01:55,720 --> 01:01:56,640
I'm guaranteeing you...
111
01:01:56,720 --> 01:01:58,240
3 kilos a week loss.
112
01:01:58,320 --> 01:02:01,880
So spinach soup,
lentil water, mashed veggies...
113
01:02:01,960 --> 01:02:03,080
Baby formula!
114
01:02:05,280 --> 01:02:06,800
Oh sorry, you're being serious.
115
01:02:07,720 --> 01:02:09,800
This is all my mother-in-law's fault.
116
01:02:10,280 --> 01:02:11,360
When I was pregnant,
117
01:02:11,440 --> 01:02:14,800
she would feed me high calorie
sweets everyday!
118
01:02:14,880 --> 01:02:18,280
Siddhi's birth weight was 4.1 kilos.
119
01:02:18,680 --> 01:02:20,200
I had to get 8 stitches.
120
01:02:20,280 --> 01:02:23,520
And, of course, I've had to spend
a fortune on tightening procedures!
121
01:02:23,600 --> 01:02:25,040
And all your friends...
122
01:02:25,120 --> 01:02:26,480
...are size zero.
123
01:02:26,960 --> 01:02:27,840
Zero.
124
01:02:27,920 --> 01:02:29,120
I'm also size zero.
125
01:02:29,200 --> 01:02:30,600
Except there's a one in front.
126
01:02:43,720 --> 01:02:46,440
23 years it took me to figure
out why Sneha hates my guts.
127
01:02:46,840 --> 01:02:47,440
Yes!
128
01:02:48,000 --> 01:02:49,880
Because I tore her vagina
to shreds.
129
01:02:49,960 --> 01:02:50,840
Poor thing...
130
01:02:50,920 --> 01:02:52,840
I wonder what she
feels during an orgasm.
131
01:02:52,920 --> 01:02:54,320
Ewww! That's my mom!
132
01:02:54,840 --> 01:02:57,560
I've heard there are creams for vagina
tightening and lightening.
133
01:02:57,880 --> 01:02:58,320
What?!
134
01:02:58,400 --> 01:03:00,920
Which means men want fair
and glowing down there as well.
135
01:03:01,000 --> 01:03:03,760
But of course,
it must glow in the dark.
136
01:03:03,840 --> 01:03:04,520
Yes!
137
01:03:05,200 --> 01:03:06,040
Losers!
138
01:03:06,120 --> 01:03:07,240
You guys cheat too much.
139
01:03:07,320 --> 01:03:08,760
In any case, after Arya's birth,
I'm sure I look like a...
140
01:03:08,840 --> 01:03:10,320
...train wreck down there.
141
01:03:10,400 --> 01:03:11,040
What do you mean?
142
01:03:11,360 --> 01:03:12,840
Do you bathe with your
eyes closed?
143
01:03:12,920 --> 01:03:14,880
Guys, it has no use for me.
144
01:03:14,960 --> 01:03:16,960
I haven't had sex since
Arya was born.
145
01:03:17,720 --> 01:03:20,080
Anj...Arya's almost four.
146
01:03:21,800 --> 01:03:23,880
Plus half my pregnancy.
147
01:03:23,960 --> 01:03:25,360
Regrown virginity.
148
01:03:25,440 --> 01:03:26,560
It's an actual term.
149
01:03:26,640 --> 01:03:27,360
I've read about it.
150
01:03:27,440 --> 01:03:28,560
You mean the hymen
grows back?
151
01:03:28,640 --> 01:03:31,120
It's not exactly a lizard's tail
that will grow back when it wants to!
152
01:03:31,520 --> 01:03:34,240
But serious doubt...
how do you masturbate?
153
01:03:38,640 --> 01:03:39,520
I don't.
154
01:03:39,600 --> 01:03:40,960
Oh my goodness!
Seriously?
155
01:03:41,440 --> 01:03:44,240
Why are you shouldering
the burden of the whole world?
156
01:03:44,320 --> 01:03:46,000
You just...really need to relax.
157
01:03:46,640 --> 01:03:47,840
Do any of you have
a compact?
158
01:03:47,920 --> 01:03:48,760
No...
159
01:03:52,080 --> 01:03:52,960
Thank you.
160
01:03:53,280 --> 01:03:55,440
Go to the loo and make
friends with Vagayanti.
161
01:03:55,960 --> 01:03:57,400
Vagayanti is your one.
162
01:03:57,480 --> 01:03:59,040
Mine is more like...
163
01:04:00,640 --> 01:04:01,600
Ms.VeeVee.
164
01:04:02,480 --> 01:04:04,280
VeeVee rhymes with PeePee...
I like it.
165
01:04:04,360 --> 01:04:06,680
Guys, that's my most
expensive compact.
166
01:04:06,760 --> 01:04:07,560
So?
167
01:04:07,640 --> 01:04:09,600
She's not slipping it in...
just taking a sneak peak.
168
01:04:09,680 --> 01:04:12,600
Ms.VeeVee must have spun cobwebs
down there by now.
169
01:04:12,680 --> 01:04:14,680
Don't behave so badly
with the poor thing!
170
01:04:14,760 --> 01:04:15,520
Ahem.
171
01:04:15,840 --> 01:04:18,040
You ladies done discussing
your lady parts?
172
01:04:18,480 --> 01:04:21,160
In fact, now we're
discussing gent's parts.
173
01:04:21,240 --> 01:04:23,640
So...how big is yours?
174
01:04:50,600 --> 01:04:51,400
Oh.
175
01:04:52,840 --> 01:04:54,360
Okay so...
176
01:04:54,680 --> 01:04:56,120
...there you are.
177
01:04:57,640 --> 01:04:58,960
Ms.VeeVee...
178
01:05:00,120 --> 01:05:02,640
...any cobwebs yet?
179
01:05:03,960 --> 01:05:04,720
Nope.
180
01:05:05,760 --> 01:05:06,760
I'm strong.
181
01:05:07,760 --> 01:05:08,760
How strong?
182
01:05:09,840 --> 01:05:11,640
Can you shoot out
ping pong balls?
183
01:05:13,960 --> 01:05:15,840
Well, I did shoot Arya
out after all.
184
01:05:17,240 --> 01:05:19,320
There's a pool table
outside.
185
01:05:20,240 --> 01:05:22,760
Do you want to try with
a cue ball?
186
01:05:23,520 --> 01:05:24,200
Fuck!
187
01:05:25,080 --> 01:05:26,440
This is ridiculous!
188
01:05:27,520 --> 01:05:28,160
Fuck!
189
01:05:32,760 --> 01:05:33,880
But...
190
01:05:34,480 --> 01:05:37,640
...why is it ridiculous Anjana?
191
01:05:39,280 --> 01:05:40,240
Don't I...
192
01:05:40,720 --> 01:05:43,320
...deserve a little fun?
193
01:05:43,720 --> 01:05:44,480
Fun?
194
01:05:46,600 --> 01:05:49,960
Do you remember all the
crazy things we did with Varun?
195
01:05:50,040 --> 01:05:52,200
Sometimes four times
in a night!
196
01:05:55,480 --> 01:05:57,640
He was our Mount Vesuvius.
197
01:05:57,760 --> 01:05:59,280
And he destroyed everything...
198
01:05:59,360 --> 01:06:00,880
...that came in his path!
199
01:06:02,480 --> 01:06:03,080
Fuck!
200
01:06:05,320 --> 01:06:07,520
No, no, please keep it!
Sanitize it.
201
01:06:20,880 --> 01:06:21,720
Thank you boys.
202
01:06:21,760 --> 01:06:22,600
Bye, Sir.
203
01:06:22,640 --> 01:06:23,440
See you tomorrow.
204
01:06:23,520 --> 01:06:24,240
-Bye, Sir.
-See you tomorrow.
205
01:06:24,320 --> 01:06:24,960
Goodnight, Sir.
206
01:06:25,880 --> 01:06:26,520
Jeh...
207
01:06:28,760 --> 01:06:29,760
There's something out there...
208
01:06:31,240 --> 01:06:32,000
Rats!
209
01:06:33,880 --> 01:06:35,600
I'm just kidding. Here...
210
01:06:39,360 --> 01:06:41,080
Wow...look what I found!
211
01:06:41,160 --> 01:06:42,640
Hey there little boy...
212
01:06:44,040 --> 01:06:45,520
Yuck.
213
01:06:45,640 --> 01:06:46,960
Oh my God...he's so dirty!
214
01:06:47,640 --> 01:06:49,040
He'll be clean.
Once he has a bath.
215
01:06:49,120 --> 01:06:50,200
Once he has a bath.
216
01:06:50,640 --> 01:06:52,160
So you're not a dog person?
217
01:06:52,240 --> 01:06:53,360
What is a dog person?
218
01:06:53,440 --> 01:06:54,240
You know...
219
01:06:54,880 --> 01:06:55,760
Loving.
220
01:06:55,880 --> 01:06:56,520
Loyal.
221
01:06:56,640 --> 01:06:58,240
I am loving, loyal.
222
01:06:58,840 --> 01:07:00,240
-But selectively.
-Which means you're a dog person.
223
01:07:00,320 --> 01:07:01,200
Oh God!
224
01:07:01,520 --> 01:07:02,880
Okay! Fine! If you insist.
225
01:07:05,440 --> 01:07:06,720
What are you going to do
with it now?
226
01:07:07,440 --> 01:07:08,120
I don't know.
227
01:07:08,520 --> 01:07:10,200
My building doesn't allow pets.
228
01:07:10,960 --> 01:07:13,120
But I will take him
to a shelter in Lonavala.
229
01:07:13,200 --> 01:07:13,880
Tomorrow.
230
01:07:13,960 --> 01:07:15,360
Why don't you keep him
for the night?
231
01:07:15,760 --> 01:07:16,720
No!
232
01:07:17,200 --> 01:07:19,080
I mean since we've all
found out you're a dog person.
233
01:07:19,160 --> 01:07:20,960
No! No! No way!
-Please...
234
01:07:21,040 --> 01:07:22,400
C'mon...
-No way!
235
01:07:22,480 --> 01:07:24,760
Oh my God! Even a cactus
doesn't survive in my house!
236
01:07:24,840 --> 01:07:25,520
And this...
237
01:07:25,640 --> 01:07:26,880
C'mon! One night...
238
01:07:26,960 --> 01:07:27,880
Just one night!
239
01:07:27,960 --> 01:07:28,840
I mean, look at him...
240
01:07:29,280 --> 01:07:31,640
How can you say no to him?
-No! No! No Jeh!
241
01:07:31,720 --> 01:07:32,360
Noooo!
242
01:07:58,800 --> 01:07:59,280
Eat.
243
01:08:47,440 --> 01:08:48,040
Mohit?
244
01:08:48,120 --> 01:08:49,040
Siddhi!
-Hi!
245
01:08:49,520 --> 01:08:52,080
This picnic thing for a
first date is such a good idea!
246
01:08:52,160 --> 01:08:52,760
Thank you.
247
01:08:52,840 --> 01:08:54,760
You look fantastic!
248
01:08:54,840 --> 01:08:55,800
Thank you.
249
01:08:55,880 --> 01:08:57,640
But that empire line
is not working for you.
250
01:08:58,320 --> 01:08:58,840
Nah.
251
01:09:00,360 --> 01:09:01,040
Oh God.
252
01:09:01,680 --> 01:09:02,760
Turns out Mummy's boy
is not straight?
253
01:09:02,840 --> 01:09:03,360
Sorry?
254
01:09:03,840 --> 01:09:05,640
That's popular code for
'you're gay'.
255
01:09:06,240 --> 01:09:08,080
Except for my mother,
everyone knows.
256
01:09:08,160 --> 01:09:10,200
Wait hang on.
Does that mean this date is off?
257
01:09:10,280 --> 01:09:11,200
Hell no!
258
01:09:11,280 --> 01:09:11,840
Let's go!
259
01:09:16,320 --> 01:09:18,440
So...plump girl, gay boy.
260
01:09:18,520 --> 01:09:20,160
You realize we could
be our own rom-com.
261
01:09:20,240 --> 01:09:21,240
Please. Not in India.
262
01:09:21,320 --> 01:09:23,800
Here, they will find some
way to get us married in the end.
263
01:09:24,120 --> 01:09:25,000
Can I say something?
264
01:09:25,080 --> 01:09:26,600
This little extra
weight looks nice on you.
265
01:09:26,680 --> 01:09:27,680
Makes your face glow.
266
01:09:27,760 --> 01:09:28,560
Thank you!
267
01:09:28,640 --> 01:09:29,520
I was double your size.
268
01:09:30,320 --> 01:09:30,920
So then?
269
01:09:31,000 --> 01:09:31,640
Zumba?
270
01:09:31,720 --> 01:09:32,560
That too.
271
01:09:32,640 --> 01:09:33,960
But I had one apple a day.
272
01:09:34,400 --> 01:09:36,040
Now my immunity is fucked.
273
01:09:36,120 --> 01:09:37,560
I'm constipated all the time.
274
01:09:37,640 --> 01:09:38,800
But. Look on the bright side.
275
01:09:38,880 --> 01:09:40,640
I can fit into any
Tom Ford suit I want so...
276
01:09:40,720 --> 01:09:41,520
...what the fuck do I care.
277
01:09:41,600 --> 01:09:44,400
So one second, you're saying
I should just have an apple a day?
278
01:09:44,480 --> 01:09:46,680
No, no, men love curves.
279
01:09:46,760 --> 01:09:47,760
Dogs love bones.
280
01:09:47,840 --> 01:09:49,440
Please. Say that to them.
281
01:09:49,920 --> 01:09:51,480
Just look at them.
So skinny.
282
01:09:51,560 --> 01:09:54,400
It's like looking at them in 2D.
I just want to...kill them.
283
01:09:54,480 --> 01:09:56,000
The sound of their earrings dangling...
284
01:09:56,080 --> 01:09:57,480
...echoes through their skulls!
285
01:09:57,920 --> 01:09:58,760
They're so like...
286
01:09:58,840 --> 01:10:00,440
weird...strange...
287
01:10:00,520 --> 01:10:02,200
They have to use 10 Instagram
filters on every picture...
288
01:10:02,280 --> 01:10:03,560
...just to look half decent.
289
01:10:03,640 --> 01:10:04,800
One second, look at that one okay.
290
01:10:05,120 --> 01:10:05,760
Virgin.
291
01:10:06,120 --> 01:10:07,200
That one is just ugly.
292
01:10:07,280 --> 01:10:08,480
Slutty Angel.
293
01:10:08,880 --> 01:10:10,400
And that one's a vegetarian.
294
01:10:10,480 --> 01:10:11,480
You know what that means, right?
295
01:10:12,840 --> 01:10:13,960
That will never happen.
296
01:10:14,360 --> 01:10:16,360
Listen, I've no fucking
idea what you're saying...
297
01:10:16,440 --> 01:10:17,600
But I love you!
298
01:10:18,320 --> 01:10:20,480
I think you need some
affirmation from the world.
299
01:10:21,160 --> 01:10:21,480
Okay...
300
01:10:21,560 --> 01:10:23,600
I'll give you an idea.
It will change your life.
301
01:10:23,680 --> 01:10:24,120
What?
302
01:10:30,400 --> 01:10:32,040
Seriously? Sexy lingerie?
303
01:10:32,520 --> 01:10:33,120
Even better.
304
01:10:46,600 --> 01:10:47,400
Hey Damini...
305
01:10:48,720 --> 01:10:51,880
Hi! Dr. Warsi...what a surprise.
306
01:10:52,680 --> 01:10:53,640
You live around here?
307
01:10:53,960 --> 01:10:55,200
Ya...just round the corner.
308
01:10:56,040 --> 01:10:56,760
Nice.
309
01:10:57,400 --> 01:10:58,120
Me too.
310
01:11:02,480 --> 01:11:03,240
I got my periods.
311
01:11:05,720 --> 01:11:06,400
That's good.
312
01:11:06,480 --> 01:11:07,440
Ya...relieved!
313
01:11:10,280 --> 01:11:11,360
I got to go...
314
01:11:11,880 --> 01:11:12,880
...because of puppy.
315
01:11:13,240 --> 01:11:13,920
You have a pet?
316
01:11:14,000 --> 01:11:15,640
No, no, not my pet.
317
01:11:15,720 --> 01:11:17,040
I'm taking care of a dog...
318
01:11:17,120 --> 01:11:18,200
...for a few days.
319
01:11:18,280 --> 01:11:19,120
Are you feeding it?
320
01:11:19,480 --> 01:11:20,960
Of course! Of course.
321
01:11:21,040 --> 01:11:22,240
I've kept him in my
spare bathroom for now.
322
01:11:22,320 --> 01:11:23,840
I've laid out newspaper
all over the floor.
323
01:11:23,920 --> 01:11:24,880
He poops and pisses on it.
324
01:11:24,960 --> 01:11:26,400
It's just easy to
wrap and throw away.
325
01:11:26,480 --> 01:11:28,280
But shouldn't you
be taking him out for it?
326
01:11:28,880 --> 01:11:30,160
Walk the dog, Damini.
327
01:11:32,800 --> 01:11:33,520
You're right.
328
01:11:34,080 --> 01:11:34,960
Leaving now...
329
01:11:35,040 --> 01:11:36,000
...walking the dog.
330
01:11:37,200 --> 01:11:37,640
Bye.
331
01:11:37,720 --> 01:11:38,360
Your...
332
01:11:40,160 --> 01:11:40,760
Drink.
333
01:11:40,840 --> 01:11:41,600
So sorry.
334
01:11:43,320 --> 01:11:43,920
See you...
335
01:11:53,000 --> 01:11:53,800
C'mon!
336
01:11:55,000 --> 01:11:56,880
His Holy Dogness!
Come, come.
337
01:11:56,960 --> 01:11:58,120
Come, come.
338
01:11:58,640 --> 01:12:00,000
Oh what a good boy.
Come, come, puppy.
339
01:12:01,360 --> 01:12:02,200
Come, come.
340
01:12:07,520 --> 01:12:08,000
Hello...
341
01:12:09,800 --> 01:12:10,400
What?
342
01:12:14,960 --> 01:12:15,640
What do you mean?
343
01:12:18,600 --> 01:12:21,120
Is there any such thing
as a shelter not having place?
344
01:12:23,000 --> 01:12:24,280
You can't do this to me, Jeh.
345
01:12:26,000 --> 01:12:27,840
But you had said one day,
remember?
346
01:12:27,920 --> 01:12:28,880
Just one day.
347
01:12:29,440 --> 01:12:31,280
No, no, not later!
348
01:12:31,360 --> 01:12:33,640
You cannot hang up on me!
Hello?
349
01:12:35,120 --> 01:12:35,680
Jeh!
350
01:12:44,200 --> 01:12:45,520
Thank you universe!
351
01:12:50,240 --> 01:12:52,240
And here's your pancake...
352
01:12:53,440 --> 01:12:54,840
Leave this for now and eat.
353
01:12:58,280 --> 01:12:59,200
Do you want some jam?
354
01:13:00,040 --> 01:13:00,720
Honey?
355
01:13:02,320 --> 01:13:03,880
Then what do you want baby?
356
01:13:03,960 --> 01:13:06,400
This is not how
Kavya aunty makes it.
357
01:13:07,640 --> 01:13:09,440
Then how does Kavya
aunty make it, baby?
358
01:13:09,520 --> 01:13:10,280
Teddy shape.
359
01:13:14,440 --> 01:13:16,160
Here's your teddy, okay?
360
01:13:16,520 --> 01:13:21,000
Eyes, nose, smile.
361
01:13:21,080 --> 01:13:21,760
Ears.
362
01:13:22,080 --> 01:13:24,000
That's your teddy pancake, okay.
Now eat.
363
01:13:24,560 --> 01:13:26,360
This is not how
Kavya aunty makes it.
364
01:13:26,440 --> 01:13:27,600
Arya baby!
365
01:13:28,160 --> 01:13:30,440
No more Kavya aunty
in this house, okay?
366
01:13:30,520 --> 01:13:32,200
I call her Pooky aunty.
367
01:13:32,840 --> 01:13:35,080
Dadda also calls her Pooky.
368
01:13:44,280 --> 01:13:44,960
I bet...
369
01:13:45,040 --> 01:13:46,800
...Pooky aunty's vagina...
370
01:13:46,920 --> 01:13:48,640
...isn't a haunted house...
371
01:13:49,080 --> 01:13:50,480
...covered in cobwebs.
372
01:13:51,680 --> 01:13:56,080
I saw Vesuvius when
it was really active.
373
01:13:57,800 --> 01:13:59,480
It must've sobered
down by now.
374
01:14:00,400 --> 01:14:02,080
So...she can have him now.
375
01:14:02,800 --> 01:14:08,640
But you do miss the
hot, molten, lava.
376
01:14:10,000 --> 01:14:10,800
Don't you?
377
01:14:14,920 --> 01:14:15,960
Mama, what happened?
378
01:14:17,040 --> 01:14:18,240
Nothing baby.
379
01:14:18,320 --> 01:14:19,280
Bad dream.
380
01:14:24,760 --> 01:14:26,280
A teddy bear pancake.
381
01:14:26,960 --> 01:14:29,000
I mean what the hell is that!
382
01:14:29,080 --> 01:14:33,080
And why is she making teddy
bear pancakes for my daughter?!
383
01:14:33,160 --> 01:14:35,560
Can't you spend a minute
without uttering her name?
384
01:14:35,680 --> 01:14:37,280
You're using her name
like a vowel.
385
01:14:37,320 --> 01:14:39,160
If you take Kavya's name
one more time,
386
01:14:39,240 --> 01:14:40,520
then you'll have to
take a shot.
387
01:14:40,560 --> 01:14:41,440
Ya.
-Ya.
388
01:14:41,760 --> 01:14:42,960
Why are you punishing me?
389
01:14:43,040 --> 01:14:45,640
It's that Kavya who's just trying to...
-Oh my God. Jeh! One shot please.
390
01:14:45,720 --> 01:14:48,280
Hey! If Kavya is not...
-Make that two please!
391
01:14:48,320 --> 01:14:50,800
Guys, I'm just trying to
make you understand that Kavya...
392
01:14:50,920 --> 01:14:51,800
Three shots!
393
01:14:52,240 --> 01:14:53,200
God!
394
01:14:55,960 --> 01:14:57,320
Keep the bottle.
You're going to need it.
395
01:14:58,080 --> 01:14:59,160
Jeh, you too?
396
01:15:00,320 --> 01:15:02,560
Seriously, I heard you
say that name so many times...
397
01:15:02,640 --> 01:15:03,960
...that I just called
Bosco back there Kavya.
398
01:15:05,320 --> 01:15:05,800
He did.
399
01:15:07,240 --> 01:15:08,080
Here.
400
01:15:08,200 --> 01:15:09,520
C'mon, c'mon...
Let's go, let's go...
401
01:15:09,560 --> 01:15:11,640
Seriously?
402
01:15:11,720 --> 01:15:12,880
C'mon! Yeah!
403
01:15:12,960 --> 01:15:14,800
C'mon for Kavya!
404
01:15:22,640 --> 01:15:23,440
Damini...
405
01:15:24,040 --> 01:15:25,640
...the rape country video story?
406
01:15:26,080 --> 01:15:28,080
I know.
Two million hits already!
407
01:15:28,440 --> 01:15:30,160
But we're also getting
trolled badly.
408
01:15:31,000 --> 01:15:35,200
I have never seen such hatred and
so many trolls in my life.
409
01:15:35,760 --> 01:15:39,760
Rizvi Roy, you fuckin' bitch!
410
01:15:41,080 --> 01:15:43,280
It's time to show her
what her true worth is!
411
01:15:43,320 --> 01:15:45,560
#worthlessdramaqueen
412
01:15:47,680 --> 01:15:51,080
Paid media libtard presstitutes
in Investigator.com...
413
01:15:51,160 --> 01:15:52,320
...should all be raped.
414
01:15:52,720 --> 01:15:56,240
Damini's mother is H.O.A.R.
Father is pimp.
415
01:15:56,320 --> 01:15:58,080
She should've been aborted.
416
01:15:58,960 --> 01:16:01,400
H.O.A.R? I think he means whore.
417
01:16:03,520 --> 01:16:04,640
Can we track these
people down?
418
01:16:05,200 --> 01:16:06,880
I mean some are
unemployed losers.
419
01:16:06,960 --> 01:16:09,200
Others are digital
agencies in China, Russia...
420
01:16:09,280 --> 01:16:10,440
...and even right here.
421
01:16:10,520 --> 01:16:13,560
Hired by political parties to further
their own damn agendas.
422
01:16:13,680 --> 01:16:15,080
Cheap internet connections,
423
01:16:15,200 --> 01:16:17,320
anonymous handle,
egg for a display picture
424
01:16:17,400 --> 01:16:18,640
and then just attack people.
425
01:16:18,960 --> 01:16:22,320
You know what, the problem is
there's zero bloody accountability.
426
01:16:23,880 --> 01:16:25,080
So then that's our story.
427
01:16:26,080 --> 01:16:27,080
Let's unmask them.
428
01:16:27,800 --> 01:16:29,720
Let's hunt each one of
these assholes
429
01:16:29,800 --> 01:16:31,480
and drag them out of their
hiding places.
430
01:16:31,800 --> 01:16:32,480
Let's do it!
431
01:16:32,960 --> 01:16:33,400
Ya.
432
01:16:36,560 --> 01:16:37,320
Damini!
433
01:16:37,920 --> 01:16:39,160
Sorry Uma, I'm just in a
middle of something…
434
01:16:39,240 --> 01:16:39,760
I'll just join you.
435
01:16:39,800 --> 01:16:42,560
I'd like you to meet
Akanksha Moitra.
436
01:16:43,160 --> 01:16:47,480
A Columbia University graduate
in journalism and a...
437
01:16:47,560 --> 01:16:48,760
...Bengali just like you.
438
01:16:49,160 --> 01:16:49,520
Okay.
439
01:16:49,560 --> 01:16:50,280
Hi!
440
01:16:50,320 --> 01:16:51,320
Hi.
-Lovely to meet you…
441
01:16:51,440 --> 01:16:52,040
Same here.
442
01:16:52,800 --> 01:16:55,240
And she's also a Fulbright scholar.
443
01:16:55,320 --> 01:16:58,640
She's just finished her internship
with The Star in New York.
444
01:16:58,720 --> 01:17:00,680
The Star as in the tabloid?
445
01:17:00,760 --> 01:17:01,520
Yes.
-Okay...
446
01:17:01,800 --> 01:17:04,880
They offered me their full time position
but I was so over NYC!
447
01:17:05,560 --> 01:17:07,720
And then Uma called and
I couldn't help but...
448
01:17:07,800 --> 01:17:08,680
...jump at the offer.
449
01:17:09,320 --> 01:17:10,200
The offer?
450
01:17:10,280 --> 01:17:10,800
Yes...
451
01:17:11,320 --> 01:17:12,000
What offer?
452
01:17:12,760 --> 01:17:14,240
I didn't know we were hiring.
453
01:17:14,560 --> 01:17:17,080
I thought you wanted to
reduce losses.
454
01:17:17,560 --> 01:17:20,040
Akanksha won't come
in your way.
455
01:17:20,640 --> 01:17:22,560
She's going to concentrate
on the lighter subjects.
456
01:17:22,640 --> 01:17:26,520
Like entertainment or
celebrities, socialites...
457
01:17:26,560 --> 01:17:27,240
Gossip?
458
01:17:27,560 --> 01:17:29,160
The readers want exactly
this Damini.
459
01:17:29,760 --> 01:17:30,960
It's what gets the hits.
460
01:17:31,440 --> 01:17:32,560
Work with Akanksha.
461
01:17:33,000 --> 01:17:33,800
Make it work.
462
01:17:39,680 --> 01:17:40,080
Hi!
463
01:17:40,520 --> 01:17:41,440
What are you doing here?
464
01:17:41,960 --> 01:17:44,240
We'll have to train
for two hours everyday.
465
01:17:44,320 --> 01:17:45,320
Day one, plyos.
Day two, cardio.
466
01:17:45,440 --> 01:17:46,520
Day three, chest.
Day four, legs.
467
01:17:46,560 --> 01:17:49,480
Day five and six,
martial arts and sparring.
468
01:17:49,560 --> 01:17:51,760
Training, training, training,
repeat, repeat, repeat.
469
01:17:51,800 --> 01:17:53,080
You will fall, you will breakdown,
you will cry.
470
01:17:53,160 --> 01:17:55,280
We will do whatever
it takes but we will not stop.
471
01:17:55,320 --> 01:17:57,320
Because right now,
your muscles are soft.
472
01:17:57,440 --> 01:17:59,640
We have to harden them
like stone.
473
01:17:59,720 --> 01:18:00,920
And these love handles
of yours...
474
01:18:01,000 --> 01:18:03,160
...are meant only for
your boyfriend.
475
01:18:03,240 --> 01:18:04,880
I don't have a boyfriend.
476
01:18:07,080 --> 01:18:09,240
One week free trial.
477
01:18:09,320 --> 01:18:10,320
You won't regret it.
478
01:18:11,200 --> 01:18:12,680
How long did you practice
this speech?
479
01:18:14,400 --> 01:18:15,640
At least 10-12 times...
480
01:18:15,720 --> 01:18:17,680
...but it sounded
way better in my head.
481
01:18:19,480 --> 01:18:20,160
Come in Umang.
482
01:18:28,480 --> 01:18:29,720
I'm telling you...
483
01:18:29,800 --> 01:18:30,720
...this is so much better.
484
01:18:30,800 --> 01:18:32,240
No, she keeps doing these
stupid things...
485
01:18:32,320 --> 01:18:33,280
Doesn't even matter!
486
01:18:36,800 --> 01:18:37,600
Hi Mom...
487
01:18:38,840 --> 01:18:39,480
Yes...
488
01:18:40,080 --> 01:18:41,200
No, I'm at work.
489
01:18:42,200 --> 01:18:43,360
Yes Mom, I've eaten.
490
01:18:44,880 --> 01:18:46,440
Okay, I'll call Dad tomorrow.
491
01:18:48,680 --> 01:18:50,120
How are Karanveer and Pinky?
492
01:18:51,400 --> 01:18:52,080
Okay.
493
01:18:53,240 --> 01:18:54,640
Give my love to everyone.
494
01:18:57,160 --> 01:18:58,320
Okay Mom. Bye.
495
01:19:03,600 --> 01:19:05,640
Guys, wasn't Umang right
here with us?
496
01:19:05,720 --> 01:19:06,680
Where did she go?
497
01:19:07,600 --> 01:19:09,360
Guys, that was Mom
on the line.
498
01:19:09,440 --> 01:19:11,440
Dude, you were incredibly
well behaved!
499
01:19:12,200 --> 01:19:15,880
The amount of grief I have
put my mom and dad through...
500
01:19:15,960 --> 01:19:16,560
Enough.
501
01:19:16,880 --> 01:19:17,720
Now no more.
502
01:19:20,080 --> 01:19:22,200
Umang teaches physical
training in school.
503
01:19:22,280 --> 01:19:24,840
No wonder she's so
slim and trim.
504
01:19:25,200 --> 01:19:26,520
Don't you worry.
505
01:19:26,600 --> 01:19:30,400
She will cook healthy food
for your son.
506
01:19:30,720 --> 01:19:33,000
She even makes butter
chicken without the butter!
507
01:19:33,080 --> 01:19:33,440
Really?
508
01:19:33,520 --> 01:19:36,320
I promise you...you won't
stop licking your fingers.
509
01:19:36,400 --> 01:19:38,640
No one can tell there's
no butter in it.
510
01:19:38,960 --> 01:19:40,080
Don't you agree?
-Absolutely.
511
01:19:40,160 --> 01:19:42,120
Well, then I can't wait
to try her butter chicken!
512
01:19:43,720 --> 01:19:44,840
But where is Umang?
513
01:19:46,440 --> 01:19:47,760
He has three mansions.
514
01:19:47,840 --> 01:19:48,640
And a field.
515
01:19:49,440 --> 01:19:51,160
They will keep you
like a princess.
516
01:19:51,840 --> 01:19:52,640
You'll be happy.
517
01:19:53,440 --> 01:19:54,400
Just like you?
518
01:19:54,760 --> 01:19:55,400
Happy.
519
01:19:56,680 --> 01:19:57,520
What do you expect?
520
01:19:58,200 --> 01:20:00,960
To find true love with Prince Charming
on a white horse?
521
01:20:01,640 --> 01:20:02,560
Or a princess.
522
01:20:03,040 --> 01:20:04,760
I'll send you my wedding card.
You wait and watch.
523
01:20:05,080 --> 01:20:05,520
Okay.
524
01:20:05,840 --> 01:20:07,200
What the hell is all this?!
525
01:20:07,280 --> 01:20:08,920
I feel chained like a cow!
526
01:20:09,400 --> 01:20:11,400
You're wearing an outfit
like this for the first time.
527
01:20:14,120 --> 01:20:16,120
What are you doing?!
Are you out of your mind?!
528
01:20:16,200 --> 01:20:17,280
It's all making sense now.
529
01:20:22,240 --> 01:20:23,200
Such is life, Umi.
530
01:20:24,240 --> 01:20:26,160
You need to find your happiness
in this new relationship.
531
01:20:27,360 --> 01:20:28,160
You call this happiness?
532
01:20:28,920 --> 01:20:30,240
Taking care of someone's home.
533
01:20:30,760 --> 01:20:32,120
Praying for his long life?
534
01:20:32,600 --> 01:20:33,800
This is the system right?
535
01:20:34,960 --> 01:20:35,920
Respect it.
536
01:20:37,160 --> 01:20:38,400
And what about respecting
ourselves?
537
01:20:39,040 --> 01:20:40,760
Think about your parents.
538
01:20:42,040 --> 01:20:42,840
Their entire life...
539
01:20:42,920 --> 01:20:44,480
...one spoke while the
other listened.
540
01:20:44,880 --> 01:20:46,040
Is this what you call
a marriage?
541
01:20:46,520 --> 01:20:47,440
And you and my brother?
542
01:20:49,400 --> 01:20:51,480
You'll spend your whole
life trying to love him.
543
01:20:52,600 --> 01:20:54,000
This place suffocates me!
544
01:20:55,240 --> 01:20:56,080
What are you doing?
545
01:20:56,640 --> 01:20:57,960
Umi no...Umi...
546
01:20:58,320 --> 01:21:00,040
Don't make this mistake!
Don't do it!
547
01:21:00,640 --> 01:21:02,400
Go down in five minutes...
548
01:21:02,480 --> 01:21:04,680
...and tell everyone
that you can't find me.
549
01:21:05,920 --> 01:21:07,120
This is the least you can
do for me.
550
01:21:08,640 --> 01:21:09,280
Please.
551
01:21:16,200 --> 01:21:17,320
You wore an Indian outfit?
552
01:21:17,680 --> 01:21:20,320
And that too for a guy?
-Oh God!
553
01:21:20,640 --> 01:21:23,960
Is that the only thing you
heard in my entire story?
554
01:21:25,120 --> 01:21:27,360
So how did you sort it
out with your folks?
555
01:21:27,440 --> 01:21:30,040
Simple. We just brushed
it under the carpet.
556
01:21:30,640 --> 01:21:32,640
Basically,
under the carpet in our house...
557
01:21:32,720 --> 01:21:35,080
...you'll find tons
of hidden misconceptions...
558
01:21:35,160 --> 01:21:37,400
...and unresolved arguments.
559
01:21:37,480 --> 01:21:38,240
Insane!
560
01:21:39,440 --> 01:21:41,800
So you'll never tell
them that you're bisexual?
561
01:21:42,760 --> 01:21:44,680
The carpet's not that big.
562
01:21:46,720 --> 01:21:48,240
You know it's really sad that...
563
01:21:48,320 --> 01:21:51,120
...we can't discuss our
sexuality with our mothers.
564
01:21:52,120 --> 01:21:53,000
When Arya grows up,
565
01:21:53,080 --> 01:21:56,320
I'll make sure I discuss
everything with her.
566
01:21:56,400 --> 01:21:58,600
Sex, drugs, boys...
567
01:21:59,400 --> 01:22:00,080
Vagina.
568
01:22:01,680 --> 01:22:02,560
I'm sorry...
569
01:22:02,640 --> 01:22:05,800
Did you just whisper vagina?
570
01:22:06,200 --> 01:22:07,240
I mean, just say it.
571
01:22:07,680 --> 01:22:09,360
VAGINAAAAAA!
572
01:22:09,720 --> 01:22:11,680
All hail the vagina!
573
01:22:12,720 --> 01:22:13,360
Mad?
574
01:22:13,440 --> 01:22:14,520
Why? What's the big deal?
575
01:22:14,600 --> 01:22:16,240
Try it Siddhi! C'mon...
576
01:22:16,320 --> 01:22:17,320
You'll feel a sense of nirvana.
C'mon...
577
01:22:17,400 --> 01:22:17,840
Okay.
578
01:22:18,480 --> 01:22:20,800
All hail my vagina!
579
01:22:22,560 --> 01:22:24,920
Next time shout this out
at the bar...
580
01:22:25,000 --> 01:22:27,280
...and just watch, you'll
have four boys lining up for you.
581
01:22:27,760 --> 01:22:28,520
Yeah!
582
01:22:29,000 --> 01:22:29,840
Alright Anj...
583
01:22:30,200 --> 01:22:31,160
C'mon...
-What?
584
01:22:31,240 --> 01:22:32,320
Go for it!
-Go!
585
01:22:33,200 --> 01:22:34,440
Guys...
-What?
586
01:22:34,520 --> 01:22:36,520
C'mon, c'mon...
-Okay, okay.
587
01:22:38,080 --> 01:22:39,520
Vagina...
588
01:22:40,880 --> 01:22:44,240
Vagina...come to mama...
-What was that? Seriously?
589
01:22:44,320 --> 01:22:46,840
Okay, okay, I'll do it again.
-Okay...
590
01:22:48,440 --> 01:22:50,560
VAGINAAAAAA!
591
01:22:50,640 --> 01:22:53,040
Nice!
592
01:22:54,400 --> 01:22:57,240
Make me come you
motherfucker!
593
01:22:58,200 --> 01:23:00,760
(Girls shout out vagina in
multiple languages)
594
01:23:01,120 --> 01:23:02,400
Guys, guys...Yoni
595
01:23:02,760 --> 01:23:03,360
Choot.
596
01:23:03,760 --> 01:23:04,280
Chuthadi.
597
01:23:04,360 --> 01:23:06,240
Choot and Chuthadi are
the same...so another one.
598
01:23:06,560 --> 01:23:07,080
Okay, fine.
599
01:23:07,160 --> 01:23:08,320
You come up with
something then.
600
01:23:09,080 --> 01:23:10,000
Poonani!
601
01:23:10,440 --> 01:23:13,200
I heard it in a rap song and
I've been dying to use it since then.
602
01:23:13,280 --> 01:23:14,440
Kandu! Kandu!
603
01:23:14,520 --> 01:23:15,720
That sounds like Gandu!
604
01:23:15,800 --> 01:23:16,880
Bhosadi!
605
01:23:16,960 --> 01:23:18,320
Oh! Vajayjay!
606
01:23:18,400 --> 01:23:19,360
Fuddu!
607
01:23:19,720 --> 01:23:20,360
Pooku!
608
01:23:20,680 --> 01:23:21,360
Putki!
609
01:23:22,200 --> 01:23:23,240
Twinkle!
610
01:23:23,320 --> 01:23:24,080
Vajizzle!
611
01:23:24,480 --> 01:23:25,320
Pookie!
40708
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