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00:00:14,114 --> 00:00:16,844
"Good evening, I'm Julie Andrews."
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00:00:16,983 --> 00:00:18,951
And I like to welcome you
to this special
3
00:00:19,119 --> 00:00:22,418
"NHK broadcast of Victor, Victoria"
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00:00:22,589 --> 00:00:24,989
which opened at Broadway's
Marquis Theater
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00:00:25,158 --> 00:00:28,525
"on October the 25th, 1995."
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00:00:28,661 --> 00:00:32,722
"Traditionally, Broadway shows are
never seen on television"
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00:00:32,899 --> 00:00:34,924
while the play is still running.
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00:00:35,101 --> 00:00:40,596
Tonight's program is a special
gift to all my friends in Japan.
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00:00:41,341 --> 00:00:43,901
I began my Broadway career
when I came to New York
10
00:00:44,044 --> 00:00:46,706
in a show called The Boyfriend.
11
00:00:46,880 --> 00:00:49,474
My Fair Lady and Camelot followed
12
00:00:49,616 --> 00:00:53,746
but then came films and the family
and Broadway receded
13
00:00:53,920 --> 00:00:55,785
into the background for me.
14
00:00:55,922 --> 00:00:58,755
"But Broadway stays in your blood
and here I am,"
15
00:00:58,925 --> 00:01:00,085
"all these years later,"
16
00:01:00,427 --> 00:01:01,485
"back in the theater,"
17
00:01:01,628 --> 00:01:05,428
still as excited and as nervous
as I was then.
18
00:01:05,598 --> 00:01:08,999
I now perform on this stage in
front of a live audience
19
00:01:09,169 --> 00:01:13,003
eight times a week in a show that
is very close to my heart.
20
00:01:13,173 --> 00:01:17,507
"Tonight, the best seat in this
theater is yours."
21
00:01:17,644 --> 00:01:20,408
And I hope you will enjoy
the performance as much as
22
00:01:20,580 --> 00:01:23,606
I enjoy being back on the stage
again.
23
00:04:46,052 --> 00:04:48,020
Nowhere I know.
24
00:04:48,354 --> 00:04:50,584
No matter where I go.
25
00:04:50,757 --> 00:04:55,558
Seduces men like Paris does en
masse.
26
00:04:55,695 --> 00:05:00,496
"The streets of Pigalle, the bars
of Les Halles,"
27
00:05:00,633 --> 00:05:05,661
the brasseries and the cafes
at Montparnasse.
28
00:05:06,072 --> 00:05:11,009
The cabarets and bistros where
the writer or artistegoes
29
00:05:11,344 --> 00:05:17,044
are as much apart of Paris as
La Tour iffel.
30
00:05:17,383 --> 00:05:19,715
The restaurants for the purists.
31
00:05:19,886 --> 00:05:22,377
"The nightclubs for the tourists,"
32
00:05:22,522 --> 00:05:28,119
we have those in abundance
as well.
33
00:05:29,762 --> 00:05:33,858
Paris can be a dangerous affair.
34
00:05:34,033 --> 00:05:38,697
She offers far more follies than
the Follies Bergeres.
35
00:05:38,838 --> 00:05:43,537
"For sheer sophistication plus
some higher education,"
36
00:05:43,676 --> 00:05:48,636
the smarter set can't wait to step
this way.
37
00:05:49,015 --> 00:05:55,648
"For here at club Chez Louis as
you're all about to see,"
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00:05:55,788 --> 00:06:05,095
we'll tell you straight why gay
Paris is gay!
39
00:06:06,566 --> 00:06:07,726
Hi!
40
00:06:10,036 --> 00:06:15,804
"Paris by night, Paris la nuit."
41
00:06:15,975 --> 00:06:21,470
Seduces us in ways we don't
expect to be.
42
00:06:21,614 --> 00:06:29,851
She has magic from which even a
Houdini can't be free.
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00:06:33,559 --> 00:06:39,498
'Cause Paris by night has mystery
44
00:06:39,632 --> 00:06:45,332
that's haunted us
and taunted us through history.
45
00:06:45,471 --> 00:06:53,742
Shady secrets she is all too
aware we long to share.
46
00:06:58,050 --> 00:07:00,518
"That's why it is, I guess,"
47
00:07:00,686 --> 00:07:09,025
we all adore her and hunger to
explore her hidden charms.
48
00:07:09,328 --> 00:07:14,732
She fools us all because she's
so capricious
49
00:07:14,867 --> 00:07:23,935
but nothing's more delicious than
to sleep in her arms.
50
00:07:24,076 --> 00:07:32,450
For Paris by night the only way to
realize that all in all
51
00:07:32,585 --> 00:07:39,252
"it's nighttime not the day that
sets her apart,"
52
00:07:39,392 --> 00:07:47,857
wins every heart and makes all
our dreams take flight.
53
00:07:48,000 --> 00:07:52,733
"There's no dream you can't find
in Paris,"
54
00:07:52,872 --> 00:07:56,706
Paris by night.
55
00:08:05,518 --> 00:08:12,549
"Monsieur, it's a pleasure to have
you here at Chez Louis."
56
00:08:18,030 --> 00:08:20,658
"That's why it is, I guess,"
57
00:08:20,800 --> 00:08:29,299
we all adore her and hunger to
explore her hidden charms.
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00:08:29,375 --> 00:08:34,870
She fools us all because she's
so capricious
59
00:08:35,014 --> 00:08:43,820
but nothing's more delicious than
to sleep in her arms.
60
00:08:43,956 --> 00:08:49,656
"But Paris by night,
you can't condemn."
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00:08:49,795 --> 00:08:55,734
They say she's really at her best
from 2:00 to 6:00 a.m.
62
00:08:55,868 --> 00:09:00,703
"C'est vrai, she's sublime."
63
00:09:02,108 --> 00:09:05,509
Nighttime's the time.
64
00:09:07,847 --> 00:09:13,979
When all of her dreams
take flight.
65
00:09:14,320 --> 00:09:20,418
"There's no dream you can't find
in Paris,"
66
00:09:20,593 --> 00:09:25,724
Paris by Night.
67
00:09:37,076 --> 00:09:40,409
Thank you. You're very kind.
68
00:09:40,546 --> 00:09:43,106
"In fact, you're every kind."
69
00:09:43,816 --> 00:09:45,750
I see we have a celebrity
with us tonight.
70
00:09:45,918 --> 00:09:48,443
"Miss Simone Kallisto,
star of stage,"
71
00:09:48,588 --> 00:09:51,455
screen and an occasional circus.
Take a bow.
72
00:09:51,624 --> 00:09:53,649
"Up yours, Cheri."
73
00:09:53,793 --> 00:09:55,090
"And speaking of circuses,"
74
00:09:55,394 --> 00:09:59,592
"aren't you Richard DiNardo,"
75
00:09:59,732 --> 00:10:00,596
"Careful, Toddy."
76
00:10:00,733 --> 00:10:03,634
"You know,
you're really not very funny,"
77
00:10:03,769 --> 00:10:06,602
so why don't you just piss off?
78
00:10:07,373 --> 00:10:09,807
You know you should really be
ashamed of yourself
79
00:10:09,942 --> 00:10:12,638
bringing your sweet old mother
to a place like this.
80
00:10:14,914 --> 00:10:16,347
Apologize at once.
81
00:10:16,482 --> 00:10:19,883
Why? Isn't she his mother?
82
00:10:20,720 --> 00:10:22,051
I will not be insulted this way.
83
00:10:22,188 --> 00:10:23,678
We are leaving at once.
84
00:10:31,063 --> 00:10:32,997
I'll be by to pick up my clothes.
85
00:10:33,132 --> 00:10:34,599
If you're not up to climbing
the stairs
86
00:10:34,734 --> 00:10:36,429
I'll be happy to throw them out
the window.
87
00:10:36,602 --> 00:10:37,762
"Listen here, Toddy."
88
00:10:37,937 --> 00:10:40,030
Just because you had a spat
with Richard that
89
00:10:40,339 --> 00:10:43,570
gives you no right to insult
my customers.
90
00:10:43,709 --> 00:10:44,835
"Come on they'd been insulted
so much,"
91
00:10:45,011 --> 00:10:47,309
they'd be insulted if I didn't
insult them.
92
00:10:47,446 --> 00:10:49,073
"I warn you. If you do it again,"
93
00:10:49,382 --> 00:10:53,341
I will fire you in spite of your
bar bill.
94
00:10:53,519 --> 00:10:56,647
Xcuse me. Pardon monsieur.
95
00:11:18,477 --> 00:11:18,943
Good evening.
96
00:11:19,078 --> 00:11:20,636
Good evening.
97
00:11:22,748 --> 00:11:24,113
May I?
98
00:11:24,450 --> 00:11:24,848
Yes.
99
00:11:25,017 --> 00:11:27,110
"Gregor, be a dear and see
if you can drum up"
100
00:11:27,453 --> 00:11:29,148
a nice cup of hot cocoa
for this lady.
101
00:11:29,388 --> 00:11:29,820
No.
102
00:11:29,989 --> 00:11:32,321
And put a stiff shot of brandy in
it to put it on its feet.
103
00:11:32,458 --> 00:11:33,823
"The brandy's easy,"
104
00:11:33,993 --> 00:11:37,087
but I may have to arm wrestle
Madame Roche' for the cocoa.
105
00:11:37,430 --> 00:11:38,658
You'll lose.
106
00:11:38,798 --> 00:11:39,890
I'll cheat.
107
00:11:40,800 --> 00:11:42,631
You'll still lose.
108
00:11:42,802 --> 00:11:44,497
"You were saying, mademoiselle?"
109
00:11:44,670 --> 00:11:46,297
Madame. I was?
110
00:11:46,472 --> 00:11:49,805
"Yes. You got as far as,
"Oh, but...""
111
00:11:49,942 --> 00:11:55,539
"Oh, but...
You see it's like this, I..."
112
00:11:55,715 --> 00:11:58,912
Would it be less traumatic
if I voiced it for you?
113
00:11:59,085 --> 00:12:00,677
"Yes, it might if you can."
114
00:12:00,820 --> 00:12:02,845
I can probably come close.
115
00:12:02,988 --> 00:12:06,822
"Oh but, I'm broke and
I came in here because"
116
00:12:06,959 --> 00:12:09,951
I'm cold and hungry
117
00:12:10,129 --> 00:12:12,962
and I haven't got any place
to stay.
118
00:12:16,001 --> 00:12:18,561
Have I left anything out?
119
00:12:22,374 --> 00:12:24,535
Madame Roche'?
120
00:12:27,780 --> 00:12:29,873
Let me give you a hand with that.
121
00:12:36,055 --> 00:12:38,080
"Xcuse me, what did she say?"
122
00:12:38,424 --> 00:12:40,016
We never know what she says.
123
00:12:40,359 --> 00:12:42,691
"Somehow,
we always know what she means."
124
00:12:42,828 --> 00:12:43,852
Good evening.
125
00:12:43,996 --> 00:12:46,021
"Allow me to introduce
Henri Labisse,"
126
00:12:46,332 --> 00:12:48,527
the proprietor of this gothic
establishment.
127
00:12:48,667 --> 00:12:49,361
How do you do?
128
00:12:49,502 --> 00:12:49,968
Madame...
129
00:12:50,136 --> 00:12:50,795
Grant.
130
00:12:50,970 --> 00:12:51,561
...is from...
131
00:12:51,704 --> 00:12:52,864
ngland.
132
00:12:53,005 --> 00:12:55,439
"You and Toddy are old friends, no?"
133
00:12:55,574 --> 00:12:56,734
Yes. No.
134
00:12:56,876 --> 00:12:58,343
No. Yes.
135
00:13:01,547 --> 00:13:04,675
Madame Grant is hypoglycemic.
136
00:13:05,417 --> 00:13:06,816
"Sometimes,
it's important to eat something"
137
00:13:06,952 --> 00:13:08,442
with a lot of sugar in it.
138
00:13:08,587 --> 00:13:12,887
"I see. Well, may I ask how long
you intend to stay in Paris?"
139
00:13:13,025 --> 00:13:15,118
At least until I stop shaking.
140
00:13:15,461 --> 00:13:18,021
"Actually,
I was hoping to get a job."
141
00:13:18,164 --> 00:13:20,029
"Oh, really? What kind of job?"
142
00:13:20,166 --> 00:13:21,758
Singing.
143
00:13:22,568 --> 00:13:23,933
You're a singer.
144
00:13:24,069 --> 00:13:27,004
Yes.
I'd be happy to sing for you.
145
00:13:27,139 --> 00:13:28,902
"Yes, I'm sure you would."
146
00:13:29,041 --> 00:13:32,272
"But first, there's the small
matter of the bill."
147
00:13:32,444 --> 00:13:33,376
"Oh, the bill."
148
00:13:33,512 --> 00:13:34,570
I'll take care of that.
149
00:13:34,713 --> 00:13:35,702
With what?
150
00:13:35,848 --> 00:13:37,440
Your bar bill is already far more
151
00:13:37,583 --> 00:13:38,777
than what I'd pay you in a year.
152
00:13:38,918 --> 00:13:43,548
"Xcuse me, but 123 francs
for a cup of cocoa?"
153
00:13:43,722 --> 00:13:46,691
"No, of course not.
I'm not a highwayman."
154
00:13:46,859 --> 00:13:48,520
The cocoa is on the house.
155
00:13:48,694 --> 00:13:53,290
Let's call it an even 100 francs
for the 20-year-old brandy.
156
00:13:53,465 --> 00:13:56,764
"For heaven's sake, what ever
happened to Henri Labisse,"
157
00:13:56,936 --> 00:13:58,767
the devil may care entrepreneur?
158
00:13:58,904 --> 00:14:00,531
Who threw caution to the wind...
159
00:14:00,673 --> 00:14:04,473
"Henri Labisse, of course!
Now I remember."
160
00:14:04,643 --> 00:14:07,339
Only this morning Andre spoke
of you.
161
00:14:07,513 --> 00:14:07,877
Andre?
162
00:14:08,047 --> 00:14:08,570
Cassell.
163
00:14:08,714 --> 00:14:09,339
Andre Cassell?
164
00:14:09,515 --> 00:14:09,844
Her agent.
165
00:14:10,015 --> 00:14:13,507
He said he was going to call you
to try to arrange an audition.
166
00:14:13,652 --> 00:14:15,347
I spent Christmas with
Andre perhaps
167
00:14:15,521 --> 00:14:16,749
I can get him to cut his
commission.
168
00:14:16,922 --> 00:14:18,389
Who said anything about
commission?
169
00:14:18,524 --> 00:14:19,786
"Of course if there's no audition,"
170
00:14:19,959 --> 00:14:22,359
I suppose you'll have to explain
to Monsieur Cassell.
171
00:14:22,494 --> 00:14:27,431
"No, no! Really, Toddy."
172
00:14:27,566 --> 00:14:31,400
"If Monsieur Cassell wishes you to
audition for me Madame,"
173
00:14:31,537 --> 00:14:33,437
be my guest.
174
00:14:33,606 --> 00:14:34,538
What? Now?
175
00:14:34,707 --> 00:14:36,402
Why not?
176
00:14:36,575 --> 00:14:41,274
"Well, I have some music,
but I'm afraid I don't play."
177
00:14:41,447 --> 00:14:42,607
Allow me.
178
00:14:42,781 --> 00:14:46,478
Thank you.
It's an old nglish song.
179
00:14:49,054 --> 00:14:50,316
Whenever you're ready.
180
00:14:50,456 --> 00:14:54,324
Yes. It's very nglish.
181
00:14:54,460 --> 00:14:55,893
Trust me.
182
00:15:07,806 --> 00:15:16,111
There's a fairy who hides
in my garden...
183
00:15:16,415 --> 00:15:18,645
Thank you! Thank you!
184
00:15:18,784 --> 00:15:20,649
But I...
185
00:15:26,425 --> 00:15:27,790
"As you can see, Monsieur Labisse,"
186
00:15:27,960 --> 00:15:29,689
I have a legitimate voice.
187
00:15:29,828 --> 00:15:31,022
"Yes, well you see,"
188
00:15:31,363 --> 00:15:32,261
if I was looking
189
00:15:32,431 --> 00:15:34,661
I'd be looking for something
more illegitimate.
190
00:15:34,800 --> 00:15:36,893
I'm sure with a little practice
I could do anything...
191
00:15:37,069 --> 00:15:39,663
"Lady, excuse me, that's like
a nun saying,"
192
00:15:39,805 --> 00:15:42,933
"with a little practice,
I could be a streetwalker."
193
00:15:43,108 --> 00:15:45,474
It has to come naturally.
194
00:15:45,644 --> 00:15:48,875
"That is so right.
And in some professions,"
195
00:15:49,014 --> 00:15:52,848
practice is a minor consideration.
196
00:15:53,953 --> 00:15:55,853
I find it hard to believe
that Andre Cassell
197
00:15:56,021 --> 00:15:58,683
would even consider having you
audition for me.
198
00:15:58,857 --> 00:16:00,848
"No, he didn't."
199
00:16:00,993 --> 00:16:01,687
But you said...
200
00:16:01,827 --> 00:16:02,521
I lied.
201
00:16:02,695 --> 00:16:05,721
"And in spite of what you think
Monsieur Labisse,"
202
00:16:05,898 --> 00:16:10,494
there are some professions where
practice makes perfect.
203
00:16:17,676 --> 00:16:21,510
Yes. Thank you very much.
Aurevoir.
204
00:16:21,647 --> 00:16:26,584
Toddy! That is the last straw!
You're fired!
205
00:16:26,752 --> 00:16:27,810
You can't fire me.
206
00:16:27,953 --> 00:16:29,443
"Oh, no? Why not?"
207
00:16:29,588 --> 00:16:31,488
I can't afford it.
208
00:16:31,623 --> 00:16:32,954
Toddy!
209
00:16:33,092 --> 00:16:33,956
Very well.
210
00:16:34,093 --> 00:16:35,924
"Until you pay your bar bill,"
211
00:16:36,061 --> 00:16:38,655
you're forbidden to step foot
in Chez Louis.
212
00:16:38,831 --> 00:16:40,799
"If you do,
I'll have you thrown out."
213
00:16:40,933 --> 00:16:42,924
Don't make it sound like
such a threat.
214
00:16:43,102 --> 00:16:44,296
Being thrown out of here is
215
00:16:44,470 --> 00:16:46,904
slightly better than being
thrown out of a leper colony.
216
00:16:47,072 --> 00:16:50,064
"Out! That won't happen again,
I promise you."
217
00:16:50,376 --> 00:16:51,707
That's for sure.
218
00:17:11,430 --> 00:17:13,864
Madame Grant.
219
00:17:14,633 --> 00:17:16,760
"Oh, it's you again."
220
00:17:16,935 --> 00:17:17,799
Come on.
221
00:17:17,970 --> 00:17:18,994
Where are we going?
222
00:17:19,338 --> 00:17:19,667
Up.
223
00:17:19,838 --> 00:17:20,395
What's up?
224
00:17:20,572 --> 00:17:22,062
My flat.
225
00:17:22,775 --> 00:17:26,108
"Thank you. You've been very kind,
but no."
226
00:17:26,445 --> 00:17:28,811
"Relax, I'm gay."
227
00:17:28,947 --> 00:17:32,883
That's the nicest thing anyone's
said to me all day.
228
00:17:33,419 --> 00:17:35,444
"Lead on, McDuff."
229
00:17:35,587 --> 00:17:37,578
"With pleasure.
But isn't the correct quote,"
230
00:17:37,723 --> 00:17:38,382
""Lay on, McDuff"?"
231
00:17:38,557 --> 00:17:42,425
"It depends whether you'd rather be
"led on" or "laid on"..."
232
00:17:55,641 --> 00:17:57,939
"It's not much, but it's cozy."
233
00:17:58,110 --> 00:17:59,873
And with little luck I think
I can drum up
234
00:18:00,012 --> 00:18:01,775
a nice cup of strong tea.
235
00:18:01,947 --> 00:18:02,470
"Oh, God."
236
00:18:02,648 --> 00:18:06,482
The quickest route to a British
soprano is cold-hot.
237
00:18:08,020 --> 00:18:08,850
Bless you.
238
00:18:09,021 --> 00:18:10,648
I think I'm catching cold.
Thank you.
239
00:18:10,823 --> 00:18:12,848
Get out of those wet clothes.
240
00:18:13,025 --> 00:18:18,053
Okay. Could I ask you
a personal question?
241
00:18:18,397 --> 00:18:20,729
How long have I been gay?
242
00:18:20,866 --> 00:18:25,860
"No, no. How long have you been
a hypochondriac?"
243
00:18:26,705 --> 00:18:29,071
What makes you think I'm a
hypochondriac?
244
00:18:29,341 --> 00:18:31,275
Just an educated guess.
245
00:18:31,410 --> 00:18:32,707
My ex-husband was.
246
00:18:32,845 --> 00:18:35,712
The day we got married he broke
out with the shingles.
247
00:18:35,848 --> 00:18:38,942
The day we separated his ulcer
perforated.
248
00:18:39,084 --> 00:18:42,952
The day we divorced he lost
all the hair on his body.
249
00:18:46,558 --> 00:18:48,423
You should gargle.
250
00:18:48,560 --> 00:18:50,460
That's a good idea.
251
00:18:51,497 --> 00:18:54,728
What's an nglish soprano doing
in Paris?
252
00:18:54,900 --> 00:18:59,769
She was touring with the Bath
Touring Light Opera Company.
253
00:19:03,642 --> 00:19:06,975
"Why not,
at no sense in spreading germs."
254
00:19:08,847 --> 00:19:12,647
What happened to the Bath Touring
Light Opera Company?
255
00:19:14,720 --> 00:19:19,054
I guess you could say that our
producer took French leave
256
00:19:19,358 --> 00:19:22,885
"with the bankroll.
He was the... You know,"
257
00:19:23,061 --> 00:19:25,791
I think you have a leak up there.
258
00:19:30,536 --> 00:19:34,097
You should stay in bed
and force liquids.
259
00:19:34,439 --> 00:19:35,838
It's only a cold.
260
00:19:36,008 --> 00:19:39,500
A cold tonight could be pneumonia
by the morning.
261
00:19:39,645 --> 00:19:41,636
Are you sure your husband was
a hypochondriac
262
00:19:41,780 --> 00:19:43,611
before he married you?
263
00:19:45,083 --> 00:19:47,108
As soon as my clothes are dry
264
00:19:47,419 --> 00:19:50,650
I'm going to try to sneak back
into my hotel.
265
00:19:50,789 --> 00:19:53,121
"Well, we'll solve everything
tomorrow."
266
00:19:53,458 --> 00:19:54,015
"Right now,"
267
00:19:54,159 --> 00:19:59,324
you're going to put on some
pajamas and climb into bed.
268
00:19:59,498 --> 00:20:00,556
Which bed?
269
00:20:00,699 --> 00:20:02,326
"Well, you're welcome to the sofa,"
270
00:20:02,501 --> 00:20:04,128
but you have my word
271
00:20:04,469 --> 00:20:08,735
this is infinitely more
comfortable and just as safe.
272
00:20:09,708 --> 00:20:11,676
These are for you.
273
00:20:13,145 --> 00:20:16,603
Thank you.
Could I use the bathroom?
274
00:20:16,748 --> 00:20:18,375
As much as you like.
275
00:20:18,550 --> 00:20:19,847
How's the tea?
276
00:20:19,985 --> 00:20:23,352
Almost as good as the brandy.
277
00:20:25,490 --> 00:20:29,051
"If it's of any interest,
I always keep a spare toothbrush"
278
00:20:29,194 --> 00:20:32,755
in the medicine cabinet right
next to the spare toothpaste.
279
00:20:32,931 --> 00:20:33,625
Thank you.
280
00:20:33,799 --> 00:20:38,395
"You know, I'd probably sleep
better if I know your name."
281
00:20:38,570 --> 00:20:40,333
Carol Todd.
282
00:20:40,505 --> 00:20:43,963
"Known as "Toddy" to my friends
who use my toothbrush"
283
00:20:44,142 --> 00:20:45,973
and sleep in my bed.
284
00:20:46,144 --> 00:20:48,078
What do your friends call you?
285
00:20:48,380 --> 00:20:50,371
Victoria.
286
00:20:50,549 --> 00:20:52,574
Never Vicky?
287
00:20:52,751 --> 00:20:54,844
Never twice.
288
00:20:56,888 --> 00:20:58,583
Bless you!
289
00:20:58,757 --> 00:21:00,349
There's nothing more inconvenient
290
00:21:00,492 --> 00:21:03,052
than an old queen with
a head cold.
291
00:21:04,396 --> 00:21:06,796
I think I have a temperature.
292
00:21:07,432 --> 00:21:09,400
"You mean, a fever."
293
00:21:09,534 --> 00:21:11,399
"Verybody's got a temperature
unless,"
294
00:21:11,536 --> 00:21:12,969
"of course, they're dead."
295
00:21:13,138 --> 00:21:14,696
"Here, thank you."
296
00:21:15,707 --> 00:21:19,404
You look better in Richard's
pajamas than he does.
297
00:21:19,578 --> 00:21:22,046
"Of course, he looks better out
of them."
298
00:21:23,148 --> 00:21:24,877
Who is Richard?
299
00:21:25,017 --> 00:21:28,817
Someone who used to stay here
from time to time.
300
00:21:29,454 --> 00:21:31,922
Were you in love with him?
301
00:21:32,090 --> 00:21:33,990
From time to time.
302
00:21:34,559 --> 00:21:36,652
"You know, I shouldn't pry but,"
303
00:21:36,795 --> 00:21:38,057
"if you had your druthers,"
304
00:21:38,363 --> 00:21:39,557
would you rather be...
305
00:21:39,731 --> 00:21:40,390
Normal?
306
00:21:40,565 --> 00:21:42,556
No. Straight.
307
00:21:42,701 --> 00:21:44,931
"If I had my druthers,"
308
00:21:45,070 --> 00:21:49,530
"which I don't... but if I did,
I'd rather be you."
309
00:21:49,675 --> 00:21:50,437
Me?
310
00:21:50,575 --> 00:21:54,671
"Female, like you,
would just be fine."
311
00:21:55,881 --> 00:21:58,372
"Well, I guess I can relate
to that."
312
00:21:58,550 --> 00:21:59,881
"I mean, honestly,"
313
00:22:00,018 --> 00:22:03,852
there have been times
when I wished I were a man.
314
00:22:03,989 --> 00:22:05,718
Why? For heaven's sake!
315
00:22:05,857 --> 00:22:08,587
That's easy.
316
00:22:09,594 --> 00:22:16,363
If I were a man I could do a lot
of things a woman never can.
317
00:22:16,501 --> 00:22:18,025
"Like what, for example?"
318
00:22:18,370 --> 00:22:20,838
Be free to plot and plan.
319
00:22:21,006 --> 00:22:27,411
Free to live my life without
permission from a man.
320
00:22:27,579 --> 00:22:33,575
"Man assumes that the world is
tailor-made for him,"
321
00:22:33,719 --> 00:22:35,949
which it is.
322
00:22:36,088 --> 00:22:48,432
He presumes that the world
indulges every whim if it's his.
323
00:22:48,600 --> 00:22:53,594
"What a fabulous pursuit hands
in pockets, running things..."
324
00:22:53,772 --> 00:22:56,832
I must say it appeals.
325
00:22:57,008 --> 00:22:59,568
"In my $100 suit,"
326
00:22:59,711 --> 00:23:06,048
toying with my golden fob watch
as I make my deals.
327
00:23:06,351 --> 00:23:19,924
Lucky man who is not made to feel
like an old Seiren
328
00:23:20,098 --> 00:23:29,564
What a lovely life I'd plan
if I were a man.
329
00:23:29,741 --> 00:23:36,078
I would build all the tourist
buildings reaching up
330
00:23:36,381 --> 00:23:38,747
to the sky.
331
00:23:38,884 --> 00:23:51,388
I'd explore every far off land
and I would learn how to fly.
332
00:23:52,564 --> 00:23:58,560
What a triumph it would be doing
all that fellows do
333
00:23:58,703 --> 00:24:01,763
but better and with style.
334
00:24:01,907 --> 00:24:04,535
It would be just my cup of tea.
335
00:24:04,709 --> 00:24:12,445
But they would all be furious and
I would simply smile.
336
00:24:12,584 --> 00:24:28,922
As a man I would not need to feel
Like an old Seiren.
337
00:24:29,067 --> 00:24:39,602
Though I know I never can ever
be a man.
338
00:24:39,744 --> 00:24:57,322
"Oh, the life that I would plan
if I were a man."
339
00:25:06,004 --> 00:25:08,302
"Well, would you like to know
what I think?"
340
00:25:08,473 --> 00:25:10,771
"Yes, Toddy, I would like to know
what you think."
341
00:25:10,909 --> 00:25:14,811
I think you'd make a damned
attractive man.
342
00:25:14,946 --> 00:25:17,779
You think so? How do I look?
343
00:25:20,051 --> 00:25:23,543
"Well, well... I can see it didn't
take you very long."
344
00:25:23,722 --> 00:25:24,552
"Oh, boy."
345
00:25:24,723 --> 00:25:27,021
"Richard, couldn't this wait until
tomorrow?"
346
00:25:27,158 --> 00:25:29,353
"No, we're on our way to
Monte Carlo"
347
00:25:29,528 --> 00:25:32,292
and I've come by to pick up
my things.
348
00:25:32,731 --> 00:25:35,256
"So take 'em off, buddy."
349
00:25:37,936 --> 00:25:40,404
I beg your pardon?
350
00:25:40,539 --> 00:25:42,905
I'm particular about who wears
my pajamas.
351
00:25:43,074 --> 00:25:44,268
Since when?
352
00:25:44,442 --> 00:25:47,934
"Look, are you going to
take them off, or am I?"
353
00:25:48,079 --> 00:25:48,909
Let's make a deal.
354
00:25:49,047 --> 00:25:52,539
Forget the pajamas and I'll
forget the money you owe me.
355
00:25:52,717 --> 00:25:57,279
I don't owe you a thing.
You pathetic old faggot!
356
00:25:58,723 --> 00:26:00,657
Get up! You get back in bed!
357
00:26:00,792 --> 00:26:01,588
You broke my nose.
358
00:26:01,760 --> 00:26:06,094
"Yes, and next time pick
on someone your own size."
359
00:26:06,398 --> 00:26:07,592
"I'll get you for this, Toddy."
360
00:26:07,766 --> 00:26:08,790
Get out!
361
00:26:12,537 --> 00:26:16,530
Where did you learn to throw
a punch like that?
362
00:26:17,909 --> 00:26:20,776
Sister Clementine.
363
00:26:20,912 --> 00:26:21,970
That was Richard?
364
00:26:22,147 --> 00:26:22,943
I'm afraid so.
365
00:26:23,081 --> 00:26:24,742
What a horrible human being.
366
00:26:24,916 --> 00:26:27,578
He was jealous. He thought you
were my new lover.
367
00:26:27,752 --> 00:26:29,447
He really thought I was a man.
368
00:26:29,588 --> 00:26:30,350
Yes. He really did.
369
00:26:30,522 --> 00:26:31,546
"He's lucky, I'm not."
370
00:26:31,723 --> 00:26:33,452
My God!
371
00:26:33,892 --> 00:26:34,483
What is it?
372
00:26:34,659 --> 00:26:37,856
"Victoria, I've just had the most
incredible idea."
373
00:26:38,029 --> 00:26:40,589
You said you wanted to be a man.
374
00:26:40,765 --> 00:26:43,359
"No, I said there were times
when I felt like..."
375
00:26:43,535 --> 00:26:45,059
Here' your chance!
376
00:26:45,403 --> 00:26:47,268
What an inspiration!
377
00:26:47,439 --> 00:26:51,739
Urope's greatest female
impersonator.
378
00:26:51,876 --> 00:26:52,900
Who?
379
00:26:53,044 --> 00:26:54,944
You!
380
00:26:55,080 --> 00:26:56,479
Me?
381
00:26:56,615 --> 00:26:59,015
You'll be a star.
382
00:26:59,351 --> 00:27:03,788
You'll be bigger than Garbo
and Dietrich by far.
383
00:27:03,922 --> 00:27:05,480
Trust me.
384
00:27:05,624 --> 00:27:06,556
"Oh, come on."
385
00:27:06,691 --> 00:27:10,559
If fate is kind you could
be Miss Tingette
386
00:27:10,695 --> 00:27:12,993
and Chevalier combined.
387
00:27:13,131 --> 00:27:13,995
Trust me.
388
00:27:14,132 --> 00:27:15,656
"Oh, sure."
389
00:27:15,800 --> 00:27:19,896
"The trick for a drag queen is
trying to act like a woman,"
390
00:27:20,038 --> 00:27:28,036
which very few can but the fact
is a drag queen's a man.
391
00:27:28,380 --> 00:27:30,245
So what are you saying?
392
00:27:30,382 --> 00:27:32,407
You're not a man
393
00:27:32,550 --> 00:27:33,278
I noticed.
394
00:27:33,451 --> 00:27:35,646
You're a woman they'll think
is a man!
395
00:27:35,820 --> 00:27:36,445
What a plan!
396
00:27:36,621 --> 00:27:36,985
Toddy!
397
00:27:37,288 --> 00:27:37,652
Trust me.
398
00:27:37,822 --> 00:27:39,346
Toddy! This is crazy.
399
00:27:39,491 --> 00:27:44,758
Now being a girl they all think
is a man sets
400
00:27:44,929 --> 00:27:45,987
their minds in a whirl
401
00:27:46,297 --> 00:27:46,854
"Mine, too."
402
00:27:47,032 --> 00:27:49,523
Trust me. No! Trust me.
403
00:27:49,668 --> 00:27:53,434
All you have to do for the dream
to come true is go out there
404
00:27:53,605 --> 00:28:00,534
and be what you are and we'll
make you a world famous star
405
00:28:00,679 --> 00:28:01,873
You're delirious.
406
00:28:02,013 --> 00:28:02,775
Lower your voice.
407
00:28:02,947 --> 00:28:03,572
Toddy.
408
00:28:03,715 --> 00:28:04,272
Lower.
409
00:28:04,449 --> 00:28:05,313
Toddy.
410
00:28:05,483 --> 00:28:07,644
There it is. Caruso not Charlie...
411
00:28:07,786 --> 00:28:09,481
If you don't get back into bed...
412
00:28:09,621 --> 00:28:12,556
Good! When you get angry it
lowers naturally.
413
00:28:12,691 --> 00:28:16,718
"Look, you don't have to do
anything new."
414
00:28:16,895 --> 00:28:19,659
Simply do what you do when
you're you
415
00:28:19,798 --> 00:28:20,662
I don't do that!
416
00:28:20,799 --> 00:28:23,597
And the audience won't have
a clue.
417
00:28:23,768 --> 00:28:27,602
"It's true! So, for your plan..."
418
00:28:27,739 --> 00:28:28,433
My plan?
419
00:28:28,606 --> 00:28:29,868
"To succeed and it can,"
420
00:28:30,008 --> 00:28:35,344
they must think you're a man.
Trust me. Trust me!
421
00:28:35,480 --> 00:28:37,380
If you're a man
422
00:28:37,515 --> 00:28:38,379
Which I'm not!
423
00:28:38,516 --> 00:28:41,280
You'll be the greatest star
since show business began
424
00:28:41,453 --> 00:28:41,851
Go on!
425
00:28:42,020 --> 00:28:42,509
Trust me!
426
00:28:42,687 --> 00:28:43,244
No!
427
00:28:43,388 --> 00:28:43,820
Trust me!
428
00:28:43,988 --> 00:28:44,852
No!
429
00:28:45,023 --> 00:28:47,992
The beauty of this is like all
great ideas
430
00:28:48,326 --> 00:28:50,521
it's as simple as simple can be.
431
00:28:50,662 --> 00:28:51,356
It's simple all right.
432
00:28:51,529 --> 00:28:53,656
And we'll have each other
to thank.
433
00:28:53,798 --> 00:28:54,560
For what?
434
00:28:54,733 --> 00:28:57,725
For our penthouse at the
George's Cigna!
435
00:28:57,902 --> 00:29:00,370
It's a free ride to the bank.
436
00:29:00,505 --> 00:29:01,062
The left bank!
437
00:29:01,372 --> 00:29:02,396
Not if you trust me!
438
00:29:02,574 --> 00:29:03,006
Should I?
439
00:29:03,308 --> 00:29:03,933
Trust me!
440
00:29:04,109 --> 00:29:04,541
Could I?
441
00:29:04,676 --> 00:29:07,440
"Trust me! Victoria, it will work."
442
00:29:07,612 --> 00:29:08,772
It will not.
443
00:29:08,947 --> 00:29:10,346
People believe what they see.
444
00:29:10,515 --> 00:29:13,609
And tomorrow afternoon Andre
Cassell is going to meet
445
00:29:13,752 --> 00:29:17,518
urope's greatest female
impersonator.
446
00:29:17,689 --> 00:29:21,819
Andre Cassell is the biggest
agent-producer in Paris!
447
00:29:21,960 --> 00:29:23,723
"I mean, if I'm the greatest,"
448
00:29:23,862 --> 00:29:26,695
how come he's never heard of me?
449
00:29:26,831 --> 00:29:30,790
"You're the greatest, but you're
unknown outside Poland."
450
00:29:30,969 --> 00:29:32,334
Poland?
451
00:29:32,504 --> 00:29:36,463
"You're Count Victor Grezinsky,
a Polish aristocrat."
452
00:29:36,641 --> 00:29:39,303
Your family disowned you when they
discovered you were gay.
453
00:29:39,444 --> 00:29:44,404
"We met in Warsaw, fell in love
and I brought you to Paris."
454
00:29:44,582 --> 00:29:50,987
This is all very clear now and
this cannot fail.
455
00:29:51,122 --> 00:29:51,747
I agree.
456
00:29:51,923 --> 00:29:55,051
"To get both of us dumped in some
grim Paris jail, Toddy,"
457
00:29:55,393 --> 00:29:56,087
trust me.
458
00:29:56,394 --> 00:29:58,123
"No, trust me."
459
00:29:58,463 --> 00:30:02,399
Victoria Grant's got a much better
chance singing Tosca
460
00:30:02,534 --> 00:30:04,365
in Clatanon 'C'.
461
00:30:04,536 --> 00:30:06,800
My proposal is not that bizarre.
462
00:30:06,938 --> 00:30:07,700
"Yes, it is!"
463
00:30:07,872 --> 00:30:10,466
At Cassell's you'll become a huge
star!
464
00:30:10,642 --> 00:30:11,074
Toddy.
465
00:30:11,409 --> 00:30:13,502
It's about who they think that
you are...
466
00:30:13,645 --> 00:30:16,011
Hold it!
467
00:30:16,147 --> 00:30:17,444
What's wrong?
468
00:30:17,582 --> 00:30:19,709
What's wrong? What's right?
469
00:30:19,851 --> 00:30:23,082
"I mean, a woman pretending
to be a man,"
470
00:30:23,388 --> 00:30:24,446
pretending to be a woman.
471
00:30:24,622 --> 00:30:26,954
"Darling, to convince
an audience that an illusion"
472
00:30:27,091 --> 00:30:31,528
is real the magician creates
a plausible diversion.
473
00:30:31,663 --> 00:30:36,430
Count Grezinsky is our plausible
diversion.
474
00:30:36,601 --> 00:30:39,468
But no audience is that gullible.
475
00:30:39,637 --> 00:30:41,901
"I mean, they'll know he's a phony."
476
00:30:42,040 --> 00:30:42,972
Xactly.
477
00:30:43,107 --> 00:30:43,732
What?
478
00:30:43,875 --> 00:30:49,336
They'll know he's a phony.
Trust me
479
00:31:08,366 --> 00:31:09,424
"All right, ladies."
480
00:31:09,601 --> 00:31:12,798
Let's see all of those nice legs.
Very nice.
481
00:31:12,937 --> 00:31:14,404
Lovely.
482
00:31:14,873 --> 00:31:17,068
"You are so beautiful tonight,
all of you!"
483
00:31:17,375 --> 00:31:18,774
You know that?
484
00:31:22,747 --> 00:31:24,339
Very nice.
485
00:31:27,485 --> 00:31:28,918
"All right. Less flirting,
more dancing."
486
00:31:29,087 --> 00:31:30,714
Come on. Legs!
487
00:31:32,557 --> 00:31:34,286
And guys!
488
00:31:34,692 --> 00:31:36,387
"Move it, come on."
489
00:31:36,761 --> 00:31:38,058
Arms!
490
00:31:42,133 --> 00:31:43,998
And break.
491
00:31:45,336 --> 00:31:47,736
And girls!
492
00:31:47,906 --> 00:31:49,840
All together now.
493
00:31:55,346 --> 00:31:57,678
Come on! Do it for Mr. Cassell!
494
00:32:08,059 --> 00:32:09,788
Yes! Very nice!
495
00:32:09,961 --> 00:32:12,657
Your hard work is very good.
Go home.
496
00:32:12,830 --> 00:32:15,424
Curtain is 9:30. 9:30 curtain.
497
00:32:16,067 --> 00:32:17,659
Andre! Andre!
498
00:32:17,835 --> 00:32:19,325
Just a moment! Just...
499
00:32:19,504 --> 00:32:22,337
I'm Carol Todd.
We're old friends.
500
00:32:22,507 --> 00:32:23,496
Sophie Selmier.
501
00:32:23,675 --> 00:32:25,870
I've been with Monsieur Cassell
15 years.
502
00:32:26,044 --> 00:32:28,638
"I think it's safe to say
I know all his friends,"
503
00:32:28,780 --> 00:32:29,769
especially the old ones.
504
00:32:29,948 --> 00:32:33,440
Your employer attended
my Christmas party.
505
00:32:33,618 --> 00:32:36,519
"Oh, that makes you an old friend."
506
00:32:36,654 --> 00:32:38,622
He stayed until New Year's.
507
00:32:38,756 --> 00:32:41,418
Andre! Carol Todd.
508
00:32:41,592 --> 00:32:44,356
"Christmas, '32."
509
00:32:44,495 --> 00:32:46,520
Hot Toddy.
510
00:32:46,965 --> 00:32:48,956
"Oh, my God."
511
00:32:49,534 --> 00:32:55,495
"Toddy, I'm sorry I didn't
recognize you out of uniform."
512
00:32:56,674 --> 00:32:57,800
He played Santa Claus.
513
00:32:57,976 --> 00:33:01,412
"Yes, and you put a chair upside
down on your head"
514
00:33:01,546 --> 00:33:04,515
and declared that you were one
of my reindeer.
515
00:33:04,649 --> 00:33:05,809
"Prancer, wasn't it?"
516
00:33:05,950 --> 00:33:07,975
I really don't recall.
517
00:33:08,119 --> 00:33:09,780
"What can I do for you, old friend?"
518
00:33:09,921 --> 00:33:12,321
"It's more what I can do for you,
old friend."
519
00:33:12,457 --> 00:33:15,483
"Andre, I want you to meet
Count Victor Grezinsky,"
520
00:33:15,626 --> 00:33:18,686
the world's greatest female
impersonator.
521
00:33:18,830 --> 00:33:20,320
Count?
522
00:33:23,534 --> 00:33:25,798
"Count, if you please."
523
00:33:25,937 --> 00:33:27,336
"Oh, yes."
524
00:33:38,583 --> 00:33:39,811
Did you break anything?
525
00:33:39,984 --> 00:33:40,541
Verything.
526
00:33:40,718 --> 00:33:42,083
You're lucky you're still alive.
527
00:33:42,387 --> 00:33:44,014
Not the way I feel.
528
00:33:44,355 --> 00:33:45,879
I am so sorry.
529
00:33:46,057 --> 00:33:46,989
"That's okay, Count."
530
00:33:47,125 --> 00:33:48,752
You know with a voice like that
531
00:33:48,926 --> 00:33:51,520
maybe you ought to take up duck
hunting.
532
00:33:51,963 --> 00:33:54,898
"Well Toddy old friend,
should we step into my office"
533
00:33:55,033 --> 00:33:57,695
and discuss the Count's future
in show business?
534
00:33:57,835 --> 00:33:59,996
"By all means, old friend."
535
00:34:00,872 --> 00:34:02,305
Count!
536
00:34:02,440 --> 00:34:03,873
By all means.
537
00:34:08,446 --> 00:34:09,879
Did anybody ever tell you
538
00:34:10,048 --> 00:34:14,382
that you have a beautiful pair
of eyes?
539
00:34:14,819 --> 00:34:16,480
Count!
540
00:34:16,621 --> 00:34:20,318
"From now on, call me Victor."
541
00:34:22,427 --> 00:34:25,328
"A bientot, Victor."
542
00:34:46,384 --> 00:34:47,578
That's better.
543
00:34:47,718 --> 00:34:50,448
We can't understand your questions
if you all talk at once.
544
00:34:50,588 --> 00:34:52,055
And if Monsieur Cassell and
Monsieur Todd
545
00:34:52,390 --> 00:34:54,085
can't understand your questions
546
00:34:54,425 --> 00:34:55,722
"they can't answer them, can they?"
547
00:34:55,893 --> 00:34:56,325
No.
548
00:34:56,461 --> 00:34:58,759
No. So please one at a time.
549
00:34:58,930 --> 00:34:59,589
"Monsieur Todd,"
550
00:34:59,764 --> 00:35:01,629
is it true that you're the one
who discovered the Count?
551
00:35:01,799 --> 00:35:03,391
In Poland he's known as Victor.
552
00:35:03,534 --> 00:35:04,091
Rarely Count.
553
00:35:04,435 --> 00:35:06,300
"Did you discover Victor,
Monsieur Todd?"
554
00:35:06,471 --> 00:35:08,598
Victor was already a major star
in Poland.
555
00:35:08,739 --> 00:35:09,706
"On a personal level,"
556
00:35:09,841 --> 00:35:11,706
Victor and I met and became
good friends.
557
00:35:11,876 --> 00:35:13,673
"Professionally, my friend,
Cassell,"
558
00:35:13,845 --> 00:35:15,676
deserves all the credit.
559
00:35:16,481 --> 00:35:17,971
Does Victor speak French?
560
00:35:18,116 --> 00:35:19,481
He sounds more nglish
than Polish.
561
00:35:19,617 --> 00:35:21,312
"Well, he was educated in ngland"
562
00:35:21,452 --> 00:35:23,852
and he lived there before
returning to Poland.
563
00:35:23,988 --> 00:35:25,455
What did he do in ngland?
564
00:35:25,623 --> 00:35:27,591
He was a waitress.
565
00:35:29,827 --> 00:35:30,816
You mean waiter?
566
00:35:30,995 --> 00:35:31,927
"No, I mean waitress."
567
00:35:32,096 --> 00:35:35,896
Waitresses make bigger tips
especially if they have great legs
568
00:35:36,067 --> 00:35:37,329
Victor has great legs?
569
00:35:37,468 --> 00:35:37,832
Sensational.
570
00:35:37,969 --> 00:35:40,699
That's what inspired him to become
a female impersonator.
571
00:35:40,838 --> 00:35:41,532
"Now, if you'll excuse me,"
572
00:35:41,672 --> 00:35:43,333
I'm late for an appointment.
573
00:35:44,742 --> 00:35:47,267
Why take Toddy's word for it?
574
00:35:47,445 --> 00:35:50,778
Come to the show tonight and see
for yourself.
575
00:35:50,948 --> 00:35:53,473
When I step upon this stage and
announce
576
00:35:53,651 --> 00:35:57,018
to Cassell's faithful and
discerning patrons
577
00:35:57,522 --> 00:35:59,547
Ladies and gentlemen.
578
00:35:59,724 --> 00:36:02,522
"Madams, monsieur's..."
579
00:36:02,660 --> 00:36:05,458
it is with great pleasure
that I announce
580
00:36:05,630 --> 00:36:07,723
for your great pleasure the
most sensational
581
00:36:07,865 --> 00:36:11,562
"and truly unique talent of this
century direct from Poland,"
582
00:36:11,702 --> 00:36:13,670
the Polish national treasure...
583
00:36:13,838 --> 00:36:17,399
"the one, the only, Victor!"
584
00:37:07,792 --> 00:37:13,321
"About 20 years ago way down
in New Orleans,"
585
00:37:13,464 --> 00:37:18,868
a group of fellows brought
a new kind of music
586
00:37:21,872 --> 00:37:27,367
and they decided to call it Jazz!
587
00:37:27,545 --> 00:37:33,006
No other sound has what
this music has.
588
00:37:33,351 --> 00:37:38,789
Before they knew it was whizzing'
around the world.
589
00:37:38,956 --> 00:37:47,455
The world was ready for a blue
kind of music
590
00:37:47,598 --> 00:37:55,528
and now they play it from
Steamboat Springs to La Paz.
591
00:37:59,043 --> 00:38:04,640
There is a story that began
in New Orleans.
592
00:38:04,815 --> 00:38:10,515
About a lady who discovered
this music.
593
00:38:10,688 --> 00:38:14,749
She's completely in love
with Jazz!
594
00:38:14,925 --> 00:38:21,854
Yes! No one loved it like
this lady had.
595
00:38:22,433 --> 00:38:27,700
This is the day the lady traveled
'round the world.
596
00:38:27,838 --> 00:38:33,470
You only see her where they're
playing this music.
597
00:38:33,644 --> 00:38:35,703
That's why they've seen her
598
00:38:35,846 --> 00:38:41,409
from Steamboat Springs to La Paz.
599
00:38:45,456 --> 00:38:53,693
Jazz as her escort to give
her days much Jazz.
600
00:38:53,864 --> 00:39:03,296
"Oh, baby won't you play me
Le Jazz Hot,"
601
00:39:03,474 --> 00:39:10,710
maybe and don't ever let it end.
602
00:39:12,850 --> 00:39:18,914
I tell you friend it's really
something to hear.
603
00:39:19,090 --> 00:39:25,552
I can't sit still when there's
that rhythm near me.
604
00:39:27,565 --> 00:39:31,433
"Also, baby, Le Jazz Hot,"
605
00:39:31,569 --> 00:39:38,441
maybe what's holding my soul
together.
606
00:39:38,576 --> 00:39:43,707
"Don't know whether it's morning
or night,"
607
00:39:43,881 --> 00:39:47,908
only know it's sounding right.
608
00:39:48,085 --> 00:39:52,613
"So come on in and play me
Le Jazz Hot,"
609
00:39:52,790 --> 00:40:01,698
baby 'cause I love my Jazz hot!
610
00:40:09,473 --> 00:40:10,963
"Before they knew it,"
611
00:40:11,108 --> 00:40:14,134
it was whizzing' 'round the world.
612
00:40:14,445 --> 00:40:19,075
The world was ready for
a new kind of music.
613
00:40:19,417 --> 00:40:26,448
And now they play it from
Steamboat Springs to La Paz.
614
00:40:29,093 --> 00:40:33,530
"Won't you play me Le Jazz Hot,
baby?"
615
00:40:33,664 --> 00:40:37,395
Don't let it end.
616
00:40:38,502 --> 00:40:42,802
"I tell you, friend it's really
something to hear."
617
00:40:42,973 --> 00:40:47,603
I can't sit still when there's
that rhythm near me.
618
00:41:17,875 --> 00:41:25,338
'Cause I love my Jazz hot!
619
00:43:01,111 --> 00:43:04,603
"When you play me Le Jazz Hot,"
620
00:43:04,748 --> 00:43:10,414
baby you're holding my soul
together.
621
00:43:10,588 --> 00:43:14,718
Don't know whether it's morning
or night
622
00:43:14,858 --> 00:43:17,918
only know it's sounding right.
623
00:43:18,095 --> 00:43:23,055
"So come on in and play me
Le Jazz Hot, baby."
624
00:43:23,367 --> 00:43:30,933
Because I love my Jazz hot!
625
00:43:37,014 --> 00:43:49,882
Le Jazz Hot!!!!
626
00:43:56,333 --> 00:43:58,858
Le Jazz Hot!
627
00:44:46,884 --> 00:44:49,079
She's a man.
628
00:44:49,787 --> 00:44:51,812
I can't believe it's a guy.
629
00:44:51,955 --> 00:44:53,889
I don't believe it's a guy.
630
00:44:54,024 --> 00:44:55,355
That's crazy.
631
00:44:55,526 --> 00:44:58,086
They wouldn't dare say it's a guy
if it ain't.
632
00:44:58,429 --> 00:44:59,088
Isn't.
633
00:44:59,430 --> 00:45:03,366
That's a felonious attempt to
defrock the public.
634
00:45:04,802 --> 00:45:07,293
"Ither way, you got to admit he
sure is beautiful."
635
00:45:07,471 --> 00:45:08,631
It's because he is not a he.
636
00:45:08,806 --> 00:45:11,434
He is beautiful because
he is a she.
637
00:45:11,608 --> 00:45:14,736
"Well Jeez, you don't have to get
so steamed about it."
638
00:45:14,878 --> 00:45:17,847
You act like you was falling
in love or something!
639
00:45:18,015 --> 00:45:19,414
Come on.
640
00:45:21,452 --> 00:45:23,920
He got your motor running.
641
00:45:24,088 --> 00:45:26,352
Don't be ridiculous.
642
00:45:26,490 --> 00:45:29,323
I got to admit.
He sure got my motor running.
643
00:45:29,393 --> 00:45:30,985
What's this?
Some kind of conspiracy?
644
00:45:31,295 --> 00:45:33,820
King Marchand. Andre Cassell.
645
00:45:33,964 --> 00:45:35,955
I'm so glad you could make it.
646
00:45:36,100 --> 00:45:37,567
"Come, I'll take you backstage and"
647
00:45:37,735 --> 00:45:40,602
introduce you to Monsieur Victor.
648
00:45:44,575 --> 00:45:47,271
He's fabulous.
Absolutely fabulous!
649
00:45:47,411 --> 00:45:51,575
That voice.
What about those high notes?
650
00:45:51,715 --> 00:45:53,307
He's a phony.
651
00:45:53,484 --> 00:45:54,576
What makes you say that?
652
00:45:54,718 --> 00:45:57,687
"If he's Polish,
why doesn't he have an accent?"
653
00:45:57,855 --> 00:45:59,720
"According to Toddy,
he was educated in ngland."
654
00:45:59,890 --> 00:46:00,584
Yes.
655
00:46:00,758 --> 00:46:03,659
And everything else we know
about him is according to Toddy.
656
00:46:03,794 --> 00:46:05,386
"Come to think of it, darling,"
657
00:46:05,562 --> 00:46:08,053
when did Toddy go to Poland?
658
00:46:08,398 --> 00:46:09,888
Why would a gorgeous talented
creature
659
00:46:10,067 --> 00:46:11,864
like the Count want to
set up housekeeping
660
00:46:12,002 --> 00:46:13,526
with an old kerbugian like Toddy.
661
00:46:13,670 --> 00:46:17,572
"If he's a Count, I'm Greta Garbo."
662
00:46:17,708 --> 00:46:21,109
"Well, Greta. Whatever he is,
I think he's divine."
663
00:46:21,411 --> 00:46:23,538
"Ladies and gentlemen,
may I have your attention?"
664
00:46:23,714 --> 00:46:24,612
"After the reception,"
665
00:46:24,748 --> 00:46:26,613
those of you requiring
transportation
666
00:46:26,750 --> 00:46:28,547
will find cars at the stage door
667
00:46:28,719 --> 00:46:30,744
ready to take you to the party.
668
00:46:34,925 --> 00:46:39,988
"Victor, here comes Andre
with King Marchand."
669
00:46:40,297 --> 00:46:42,663
"A king! My God,
what is he king of?"
670
00:46:42,833 --> 00:46:43,629
"Among other things,"
671
00:46:43,767 --> 00:46:47,703
he owns the most successful
nightclub in Chicago.
672
00:46:48,305 --> 00:46:49,863
And the other things?
673
00:46:50,007 --> 00:46:52,771
"The term "gangster" is an
appropriate designation."
674
00:46:52,943 --> 00:46:55,605
He's also quite a ladies' man.
675
00:46:55,746 --> 00:46:56,838
So watch your step!
676
00:46:57,014 --> 00:47:00,415
I'm safe. Don't forget I'm a man.
677
00:47:05,055 --> 00:47:07,046
Don't you forget?
678
00:47:07,391 --> 00:47:10,360
"Victor, allow me to introduce,
King Marchand."
679
00:47:10,527 --> 00:47:12,552
Monsieur Marchand.
680
00:47:15,365 --> 00:47:19,597
"Hi! Oh, some grip you got there."
681
00:47:21,104 --> 00:47:25,040
I'm Norma Cassidy. You were grand.
682
00:47:25,342 --> 00:47:26,775
"When you took off that wig,"
683
00:47:26,944 --> 00:47:28,741
I just couldn't believe
you're a man.
684
00:47:28,879 --> 00:47:30,005
King still doesn't.
685
00:47:30,314 --> 00:47:31,747
May I introduce Monsieur Todd?
686
00:47:31,915 --> 00:47:33,246
It's a pleasure.
687
00:47:33,383 --> 00:47:34,042
Miss Cassidy.
688
00:47:34,351 --> 00:47:35,716
Nchanted.
689
00:47:36,854 --> 00:47:38,048
"Me, too."
690
00:47:38,355 --> 00:47:40,687
What do you think of my new star?
691
00:47:40,858 --> 00:47:42,655
I think...
He thinks he's a phony.
692
00:47:42,793 --> 00:47:43,487
What?
693
00:47:43,660 --> 00:47:44,888
I think you're very talented.
694
00:47:45,062 --> 00:47:46,393
Yeah but he doesn't think
you're a man.
695
00:47:46,563 --> 00:47:47,359
I'll tell her what I think.
696
00:47:47,531 --> 00:47:48,930
""Her"see?"
697
00:47:49,099 --> 00:47:51,260
Norma?
698
00:47:51,435 --> 00:47:52,527
Mingle.
699
00:47:52,703 --> 00:47:53,931
Sure.
700
00:47:54,104 --> 00:47:55,935
"Care to mingle, Mr. Todd?"
701
00:47:56,106 --> 00:47:56,800
"Miss Cassidy,"
702
00:47:56,974 --> 00:47:59,033
Victor's performance excluded
mingling with you
703
00:47:59,343 --> 00:48:02,642
may well prove to be the high
point of the evening.
704
00:48:02,813 --> 00:48:05,281
I just love Frenchmen.
705
00:48:05,415 --> 00:48:06,848
So do I.
706
00:48:13,523 --> 00:48:15,684
You were saying Monsieur Marchand?
707
00:48:15,826 --> 00:48:17,953
I just find it hard to believe
that you're a man.
708
00:48:18,095 --> 00:48:20,791
Because you found me attractive
as a woman.
709
00:48:20,964 --> 00:48:22,625
"Yes, as a matter of fact."
710
00:48:22,799 --> 00:48:24,426
It happens frequently.
711
00:48:24,601 --> 00:48:25,067
Not to me.
712
00:48:25,402 --> 00:48:27,927
That just proves the old adage...
713
00:48:28,071 --> 00:48:31,700
There's always a first time.
714
00:48:32,042 --> 00:48:33,805
I don't think so.
715
00:48:35,312 --> 00:48:36,609
Xcuse me.
716
00:48:36,947 --> 00:48:41,907
Pardon. Monsieur Victor!
I am Henri Labisse.
717
00:48:42,085 --> 00:48:43,814
Good evening.
718
00:48:46,056 --> 00:48:48,616
I am the proprietor of
the Chez Louis.
719
00:48:48,759 --> 00:48:49,748
"Of course, you've heard of it."
720
00:48:49,893 --> 00:48:50,860
Yes.
721
00:48:50,994 --> 00:48:51,961
You have?
722
00:48:52,095 --> 00:48:54,359
"Of course,
but you've never been there."
723
00:48:54,498 --> 00:48:54,987
Yes.
724
00:48:55,299 --> 00:48:55,628
You have?
725
00:48:55,766 --> 00:48:57,495
No!
726
00:48:57,634 --> 00:49:00,899
"Yes, I've never been there is
what I meant to say."
727
00:49:01,038 --> 00:49:02,733
At any rate whether you have
or not...
728
00:49:02,906 --> 00:49:06,034
"Well, Labisse!"
729
00:49:06,343 --> 00:49:09,039
"Toddy, how are you, old friend?"
730
00:49:09,346 --> 00:49:11,678
How did you get in without
an invitation?
731
00:49:11,848 --> 00:49:15,045
No. I have an invitation.
732
00:49:15,385 --> 00:49:15,976
Really?
733
00:49:16,119 --> 00:49:17,518
Yes.
734
00:49:17,654 --> 00:49:20,987
"No, No, no.
What you have is a mistake."
735
00:49:22,326 --> 00:49:24,351
"I won't forget this, Toddy."
736
00:49:24,494 --> 00:49:26,052
I'm counting on it.
737
00:49:28,432 --> 00:49:29,592
That was close.
738
00:49:29,766 --> 00:49:31,461
Don't leave me alone like that
again.
739
00:49:31,635 --> 00:49:33,535
"Please excuse me,
we have to be going."
740
00:49:33,670 --> 00:49:34,295
We do?
741
00:49:34,471 --> 00:49:35,403
I have an early golf game.
742
00:49:35,539 --> 00:49:36,597
Since when?
743
00:49:36,773 --> 00:49:38,832
"Count, tell me. Do you play?"
744
00:49:39,009 --> 00:49:42,342
Golf? Yes. Occasionally.
745
00:49:42,512 --> 00:49:44,309
What's your handicap?
746
00:49:45,549 --> 00:49:49,041
Being gay. What's yours?
747
00:49:50,120 --> 00:49:51,052
"Cassell, tell me."
748
00:49:51,355 --> 00:49:53,880
How did you discover
Monsieur Victor?
749
00:49:54,057 --> 00:49:57,515
Came into my theater and
hit a G flat.
750
00:49:57,661 --> 00:49:58,821
Incredible! A G flat?
751
00:49:58,996 --> 00:50:01,863
I've never heard of a man being
able to sing that high.
752
00:50:01,999 --> 00:50:05,628
You gamble? Perhaps you like to
make a small wager?
753
00:50:05,802 --> 00:50:06,666
How small?
754
00:50:06,837 --> 00:50:08,532
"Say 1,000 francs."
755
00:50:08,705 --> 00:50:12,072
"Let's make interesting, shall we?
Say, 10,000?"
756
00:50:12,409 --> 00:50:13,137
Forget it.
757
00:50:13,443 --> 00:50:14,603
I thought so.
758
00:50:14,745 --> 00:50:17,646
"Make it 20,000."
759
00:50:17,781 --> 00:50:19,749
Bet.
760
00:50:39,770 --> 00:50:41,533
"You're coming to the party later,
of course?"
761
00:50:41,671 --> 00:50:42,103
No.
762
00:50:42,439 --> 00:50:42,905
No?
763
00:50:43,040 --> 00:50:44,769
"Mr. Todd, would you give
my regards to Victor"
764
00:50:44,908 --> 00:50:45,932
and tell her that I look
forward...
765
00:50:46,076 --> 00:50:47,907
""Her"! See..."
766
00:50:48,045 --> 00:50:50,445
Please tell Victor I look forward
to seeing the show again?
767
00:50:50,580 --> 00:50:52,070
I'll be happy to tell him.
768
00:50:52,416 --> 00:50:53,075
Good night.
769
00:50:53,417 --> 00:50:53,974
Bon soir.
770
00:50:54,117 --> 00:50:56,642
I'm really sorry we can't come
to the party.
771
00:50:56,820 --> 00:51:00,551
"It certainly won't be the same
without you, Miss Cassidy."
772
00:51:00,724 --> 00:51:02,419
Norma.
773
00:51:02,592 --> 00:51:05,561
"Till we meet again, Norma."
774
00:51:06,163 --> 00:51:07,892
"Real soon, I hope."
775
00:51:08,031 --> 00:51:08,690
Norma!
776
00:51:08,832 --> 00:51:10,925
Keep your pants on!
777
00:51:12,069 --> 00:51:17,097
"Well, Bon sewer Mr. Todd."
778
00:51:17,808 --> 00:51:20,003
Bon sewer Norma.
779
00:51:24,047 --> 00:51:24,843
Are you all right?
780
00:51:24,981 --> 00:51:26,005
Where is Labisse?
781
00:51:26,149 --> 00:51:27,980
Gone with the others.
782
00:51:28,118 --> 00:51:31,986
Did you see the look on his face
when I hit that high note?
783
00:51:32,122 --> 00:51:34,056
"I'm sorry I did that, Toddy."
784
00:51:34,357 --> 00:51:36,825
Damn King Marchand for goading me
into it.
785
00:51:36,960 --> 00:51:39,360
What do you think of King
Marchand?
786
00:51:39,496 --> 00:51:43,592
"King Marchand is an arrogant,
conceited,"
787
00:51:43,767 --> 00:51:45,325
"chauvinistic, pain in the neck."
788
00:51:45,469 --> 00:51:46,561
I think I could fall in love
with him.
789
00:51:46,736 --> 00:51:48,863
"I think I could, too."
790
00:51:49,439 --> 00:51:52,499
I'll bet you 10 francs King
Marchand cancels his golf game.
791
00:51:52,676 --> 00:51:54,701
And shows up at the party.
792
00:51:54,878 --> 00:51:55,970
What makes you think that?
793
00:51:56,146 --> 00:51:58,307
Because he's smitten.
794
00:51:58,448 --> 00:51:59,506
"Oh, come on."
795
00:51:59,683 --> 00:52:01,310
Which means he's dangerous.
796
00:52:01,451 --> 00:52:01,917
Dangerous?
797
00:52:02,085 --> 00:52:04,019
Trust me. His manhood's at stake.
798
00:52:04,154 --> 00:52:05,382
There's no telling to what length
799
00:52:05,555 --> 00:52:06,920
he'll go to prove you're a fraud.
800
00:52:07,090 --> 00:52:08,352
Finish getting ready.
801
00:52:08,492 --> 00:52:12,758
I'll make sure the evil Labisse
isn't lurking at the stage door.
802
00:53:43,687 --> 00:53:45,416
Merci. Thank you so much.
803
00:53:45,555 --> 00:53:48,683
Thank you. Thank you.
804
00:53:50,493 --> 00:53:52,723
"Andre, spectacular."
805
00:53:52,862 --> 00:53:56,093
Look who's coming...
You owe me 10 francs.
806
00:53:56,433 --> 00:53:57,730
I never took your bet.
807
00:53:57,867 --> 00:53:59,095
'Cause you knew you'd lose.
808
00:53:59,436 --> 00:54:02,428
"King Marchand, I'm so glad
you changed your mind."
809
00:54:02,606 --> 00:54:03,402
It's very late.
810
00:54:03,540 --> 00:54:04,871
What happened to your golf game?
811
00:54:05,008 --> 00:54:08,000
"He cancelled it. Well, you did."
812
00:54:08,345 --> 00:54:09,073
I'm flattered.
813
00:54:09,379 --> 00:54:10,004
It's suppose to rain.
814
00:54:10,347 --> 00:54:11,837
Baloney. He'd rather be here.
815
00:54:12,015 --> 00:54:13,414
"Well, sit down King. Join us."
816
00:54:13,583 --> 00:54:15,346
"We meet again, Mr. Todd."
817
00:54:15,485 --> 00:54:17,783
"So it would seem, Miss Cassidy."
818
00:54:20,090 --> 00:54:20,749
Would you care for...
819
00:54:20,924 --> 00:54:22,585
I'd love to!
820
00:54:22,759 --> 00:54:24,317
A drink?
821
00:54:25,996 --> 00:54:29,762
Look's like Norma's in for
a big surprise.
822
00:54:29,933 --> 00:54:31,059
Why is that?
823
00:54:31,401 --> 00:54:34,859
Isn't Mr. Todd... Isn't he...
824
00:54:35,005 --> 00:54:36,939
Isn't he what?
825
00:54:37,073 --> 00:54:38,597
"You're not going to help me out
with this, right?"
826
00:54:38,775 --> 00:54:39,935
Right.
827
00:54:40,110 --> 00:54:42,635
Isn't he a homosexual?
828
00:54:42,779 --> 00:54:45,771
Isn't that something you should
ask Mr. Todd?
829
00:54:45,949 --> 00:54:48,008
Are you lovers?
830
00:54:48,351 --> 00:54:50,911
"If you mean,
do we love each other?"
831
00:54:51,054 --> 00:54:53,420
"Yes, we do. Do we co-habit?"
832
00:54:53,590 --> 00:54:55,455
Yes. Do we have sex?
833
00:54:55,592 --> 00:54:56,581
Forget it.
834
00:54:56,760 --> 00:54:57,590
You don't want to know?
835
00:54:57,761 --> 00:54:58,056
No.
836
00:54:58,395 --> 00:54:59,794
Because the idea of two men...
837
00:54:59,963 --> 00:55:03,524
No. Because I'm still not
convinced that you're really a man
838
00:55:03,667 --> 00:55:08,604
You are preoccupied
with stereotypes.
839
00:55:08,738 --> 00:55:10,433
I think it's as simple as
840
00:55:10,607 --> 00:55:12,336
you're one kind of man.
841
00:55:12,509 --> 00:55:13,407
I'm another.
842
00:55:13,543 --> 00:55:15,067
And what kind are you?
843
00:55:15,378 --> 00:55:20,315
One that doesn't have to prove it
to myself or anyone.
844
00:55:26,623 --> 00:55:28,716
You gotta be kidding.
845
00:55:29,392 --> 00:55:30,859
Really?
846
00:55:32,095 --> 00:55:36,429
You're a queer?
847
00:55:37,634 --> 00:55:39,727
"We prefer"gay.""
848
00:55:39,903 --> 00:55:43,395
But you're so attractive.
849
00:55:43,573 --> 00:55:46,906
It seems like such a waste.
850
00:55:47,043 --> 00:55:49,568
Trust me. It isn't wasted.
851
00:55:49,979 --> 00:55:52,311
Shame on you!
852
00:55:52,449 --> 00:55:58,479
You know I bet the right woman
could reform you.
853
00:55:58,621 --> 00:55:59,918
I suppose anything's possible.
854
00:56:00,090 --> 00:56:03,423
Who knows the right woman might
even reform you.
855
00:56:05,662 --> 00:56:07,994
Me give up men? Never!
856
00:56:08,131 --> 00:56:10,895
Remarkable. You took the words
right out of my mouth.
857
00:56:14,838 --> 00:56:18,001
"Tango. Oh, King!"
858
00:56:18,842 --> 00:56:20,434
Tango me.
859
00:56:20,610 --> 00:56:23,636
"I'm sorry, Norma.
My tango's a little rusty."
860
00:56:23,780 --> 00:56:25,873
"But I'll lay 8 to 5,"
861
00:56:26,049 --> 00:56:28,347
the Count does a great tango.
862
00:56:28,518 --> 00:56:31,885
"Great! Come on, Count."
863
00:56:32,021 --> 00:56:36,583
King still thinks you're a dame.
Let's show him.
864
00:56:48,037 --> 00:56:50,437
Miss Cassidy.
865
00:59:38,575 --> 00:59:40,770
What a dancer!
866
00:59:42,045 --> 00:59:45,674
I knew he was a man all along.
867
00:59:45,848 --> 00:59:51,343
I mean a real woman
can always tell.
868
00:59:52,789 --> 00:59:57,556
Can you imagine what
Sal Andretti would say
869
00:59:57,694 --> 01:00:02,461
if he knew that his partner fell
for a female impersonator?
870
01:00:05,602 --> 01:00:06,796
Did you look under the bed?
871
01:00:06,970 --> 01:00:08,062
Yeah.
872
01:00:08,638 --> 01:00:10,538
"I know he's supposed
to protect you,"
873
01:00:10,707 --> 01:00:12,800
but does he have to stay
874
01:00:12,942 --> 01:00:16,673
in the same suite with us?
875
01:00:16,813 --> 01:00:17,780
"I mean,"
876
01:00:17,914 --> 01:00:25,480
I keep expecting him to break
in while we're making love.
877
01:00:25,622 --> 01:00:28,853
"Norma, he'd only do that if he
heard something unusual."
878
01:00:28,992 --> 01:00:30,619
Like what?
879
01:00:30,760 --> 01:00:32,591
Like if I got excited.
880
01:00:32,762 --> 01:00:33,490
Just kidding.
881
01:00:33,630 --> 01:00:34,790
You!
882
01:00:43,973 --> 01:00:45,998
"Can I get you anything, boss?"
883
01:00:51,014 --> 01:00:55,314
"Toddy, when did we move?"
884
01:00:55,451 --> 01:00:57,544
During the dress rehearsal.
885
01:00:57,720 --> 01:00:59,347
But what if I'd flopped?
886
01:00:59,522 --> 01:01:03,014
We would have ordered a sumptuous
meal charged it
887
01:01:03,159 --> 01:01:05,093
"to room service,"
888
01:01:05,428 --> 01:01:08,420
"drunk the champagne,
courtesy of the management."
889
01:01:08,598 --> 01:01:10,589
Then jumped right out
of the window.
890
01:01:10,767 --> 01:01:12,758
"That's why I chose a
three-star hotel,"
891
01:01:12,902 --> 01:01:14,870
and specifically requested
accommodations
892
01:01:15,038 --> 01:01:16,471
above the third floor.
893
01:01:16,606 --> 01:01:17,971
You're too much.
894
01:01:21,511 --> 01:01:25,641
Pooky.
895
01:01:30,086 --> 01:01:31,451
Yeah?
896
01:01:31,587 --> 01:01:33,885
Are you coming to bed?
897
01:01:34,057 --> 01:01:34,751
Yeah.
898
01:01:34,924 --> 01:01:38,655
The bathroom is a religious
experience.
899
01:01:38,795 --> 01:01:41,491
When can we afford another
bedroom?
900
01:01:41,631 --> 01:01:45,590
As soon as we're sure you're
not a flash in the pan.
901
01:01:46,536 --> 01:01:47,901
My God!
902
01:01:48,071 --> 01:01:50,596
"Besides, one bedroom, one bed,"
903
01:01:50,740 --> 01:01:52,708
promotes the illusion
that we're lovers.
904
01:01:52,842 --> 01:01:54,833
"If we decide to live apart,"
905
01:01:55,011 --> 01:01:58,310
one of us can set up housekeeping
in the tub.
906
01:01:58,448 --> 01:02:01,508
"To Victor, long may he reign."
907
01:02:01,684 --> 01:02:04,653
"At least, long enough
to pay the rent."
908
01:02:10,460 --> 01:02:13,520
Pooky!
909
01:02:13,663 --> 01:02:15,324
Yeah?
910
01:02:15,698 --> 01:02:17,063
Hurry up!
911
01:02:17,366 --> 01:02:18,458
What's the rush?
912
01:02:18,634 --> 01:02:23,594
"You know what they say,
"when in Paris.""
913
01:02:24,440 --> 01:02:25,771
"That's"when in Rome.""
914
01:02:25,908 --> 01:02:29,002
"No, Rome makes me hungry."
915
01:02:29,879 --> 01:02:35,442
Paris makes me horny.
916
01:02:35,585 --> 01:02:40,352
"Rome may be hot, sexy it is not."
917
01:02:41,457 --> 01:02:43,925
Paris is so sexy.
918
01:02:44,093 --> 01:02:52,933
Riding in a taxi gives me
apoplexy.
919
01:02:53,102 --> 01:02:58,734
Been to Lisbon and Lisbon
is a has-been.
920
01:02:58,875 --> 01:03:04,336
Schlepped to Stockholm and
brought a lot of schlock home.
921
01:03:04,514 --> 01:03:09,747
Also Oslo and Oslo really
was slow.
922
01:03:09,919 --> 01:03:14,982
Paris makes me horny.
923
01:03:15,124 --> 01:03:19,424
It's not like 'Californy'.
924
01:03:20,963 --> 01:03:23,693
Paris is so dizzy Jack.
925
01:03:23,833 --> 01:03:27,633
It's such an aphrodisiac.
926
01:03:28,871 --> 01:03:37,870
It's true Paris thrills me.
927
01:03:38,014 --> 01:03:40,608
When I see the iffel Tower
928
01:03:40,783 --> 01:03:43,274
I have to go and take a shower.
929
01:03:43,419 --> 01:03:48,721
It's true. I do.
930
01:03:49,759 --> 01:04:00,431
Paris kills me and
it makes me sexy.
931
01:04:00,570 --> 01:04:01,798
As for Madrid.
932
01:04:01,971 --> 01:04:05,031
Save it for I Cid.
933
01:04:06,108 --> 01:04:16,746
Dining at the Lido loosens my
libido Like a big torpedo.
934
01:04:18,087 --> 01:04:23,684
"Seen Geneva,
it's hardly jungle fever."
935
01:04:23,826 --> 01:04:29,025
Been to Brussels could use
some red corpuscles.
936
01:04:29,165 --> 01:04:34,467
"Tried Toronto,
departed molto pronto."
937
01:04:34,637 --> 01:04:42,544
Paris makes me tingle.
Makes me glad I'm single.
938
01:04:42,678 --> 01:04:47,274
London's okay if it's for one day.
939
01:04:48,050 --> 01:04:54,853
Paris get me sexy
in the solar plexy.
940
01:04:56,425 --> 01:04:56,891
What's the matter?
941
01:04:57,059 --> 01:04:59,391
You're still thinking
about the Count?
942
01:05:03,466 --> 01:05:10,872
Been to Munich where every guy's
a eunuch and to Dublin.
943
01:05:11,007 --> 01:05:16,536
"Things ain't exactly bubbling'
Hate Helsinki,"
944
01:05:16,712 --> 01:05:19,306
the Fins are kind of kinky.
945
01:05:19,448 --> 01:05:30,586
But Paris... Paris...
946
01:05:32,595 --> 01:05:38,898
Paris makes me... Pooky!
947
01:05:49,879 --> 01:05:54,475
"So, any thoughts
about King Marchand?"
948
01:05:54,650 --> 01:05:58,609
"No, other than how attractive
he is."
949
01:05:58,754 --> 01:06:02,588
How beautiful and intense
his eyes are.
950
01:06:02,758 --> 01:06:05,352
What it would be like to spend
a week with him
951
01:06:05,528 --> 01:06:06,586
on a desert island.
952
01:06:06,762 --> 01:06:09,322
"No, he's scarcely crossed my mind."
953
01:06:09,999 --> 01:06:11,364
What about you?
954
01:06:11,500 --> 01:06:13,900
Pretty much along the same lines.
955
01:06:16,806 --> 01:06:18,296
Xcept that I fantasize
956
01:06:18,441 --> 01:06:20,306
three weeks on a desert island.
957
01:06:20,443 --> 01:06:24,709
"You know, pretending to be a man
has its disadvantages."
958
01:06:24,880 --> 01:06:28,816
"Yes, especially if you are a man."
959
01:06:37,360 --> 01:06:41,023
Pooky.
960
01:06:48,104 --> 01:06:52,268
It's no big deal.
961
01:06:53,943 --> 01:06:59,848
"This happens to everyone... men,
I mean."
962
01:07:00,016 --> 01:07:04,316
"We're lucky. Women, I mean."
963
01:07:04,453 --> 01:07:08,014
We can fake it if we have to.
964
01:07:08,824 --> 01:07:11,349
Don't get me wrong.
965
01:07:11,527 --> 01:07:14,519
I never have with you...
966
01:07:14,697 --> 01:07:17,029
"faked it, I mean."
967
01:07:17,333 --> 01:07:19,927
"With you, it's like..."
968
01:07:20,102 --> 01:07:24,095
"Pow, POW, POW POW!"
969
01:07:24,407 --> 01:07:28,400
Like the 4th of July. Very time!
970
01:07:29,045 --> 01:07:33,778
Just because tonight you couldn't
get it...
971
01:07:33,916 --> 01:07:37,750
"up till now it's been grand,
Pooky."
972
01:07:39,388 --> 01:07:42,448
"Really, really grand."
973
01:07:42,591 --> 01:07:44,718
"And if there's one thing I know
for sure,"
974
01:07:44,894 --> 01:07:46,555
"you can't let it get you,"
975
01:07:46,729 --> 01:07:50,665
"you should excuse the expression,
down."
976
01:07:54,470 --> 01:07:56,438
You can't worry about it.
977
01:07:56,605 --> 01:07:59,369
You gotta put it out of your mind.
978
01:07:59,508 --> 01:08:02,306
"The more you think about it,
the more you worry."
979
01:08:02,478 --> 01:08:05,914
"The more you worry,
the more you think about it."
980
01:08:06,949 --> 01:08:08,473
"Think, worry."
981
01:08:08,617 --> 01:08:10,642
Yuck! Cherry!
982
01:08:11,921 --> 01:08:13,889
"Worry, Think."
983
01:08:14,056 --> 01:08:18,959
"It becomes this vicious cycle
and before you know it,"
984
01:08:19,095 --> 01:08:21,962
you are impotent.
985
01:08:30,873 --> 01:08:32,602
Pooky?
986
01:08:34,043 --> 01:08:35,943
What cha doing with the soap?
987
01:08:38,914 --> 01:08:40,643
Squash!
988
01:08:41,083 --> 01:08:43,551
How dare you put soap in my mouth!
989
01:08:43,686 --> 01:08:45,017
"You son of a bitch, bastard!"
990
01:08:45,354 --> 01:08:48,482
I'll kill you! I'll kill him!
991
01:08:48,624 --> 01:08:53,721
Norma! Norma!
992
01:08:55,598 --> 01:08:56,690
"Norma, not my new club."
993
01:08:56,866 --> 01:08:58,731
Put that down.
994
01:09:21,423 --> 01:09:23,755
"Why don't you take her to Paris,
boss?"
995
01:09:23,926 --> 01:09:25,621
I thought she'd help you relax.
996
01:09:25,761 --> 01:09:27,786
She has never helped me relax.
997
01:09:27,963 --> 01:09:29,624
Send her home.
998
01:09:35,671 --> 01:09:36,603
"I'd hate to be a bother,"
999
01:09:36,772 --> 01:09:38,706
but there seems to be a little...
1000
01:09:39,975 --> 01:09:41,636
Mr. Todd. Good evening.
1001
01:09:41,810 --> 01:09:43,607
What an amazing coincidence.
1002
01:09:43,746 --> 01:09:47,079
Victor and I are occupying
the next suite.
1003
01:09:47,416 --> 01:09:48,644
You don't say?
1004
01:09:48,784 --> 01:09:52,447
We heard sounds indicating
you were still up.
1005
01:10:01,997 --> 01:10:02,986
"I thought I'd come over,"
1006
01:10:03,165 --> 01:10:07,465
pay my respects and perhaps
borrow a cup of sugar.
1007
01:10:07,937 --> 01:10:09,063
Sorry if it got a little noisy.
1008
01:10:09,371 --> 01:10:11,362
Miss Cassidy was having
a nightmare.
1009
01:10:11,540 --> 01:10:14,407
Poor dear. Tell her I wish her
pleasant dreams.
1010
01:10:14,577 --> 01:10:15,635
"Good night, Mr. Bernstein."
1011
01:10:15,778 --> 01:10:17,609
"Good night, Mr. Todd."
1012
01:10:18,080 --> 01:10:20,014
I love your ensemble.
1013
01:10:25,421 --> 01:10:26,388
Well what do you know?
1014
01:10:26,555 --> 01:10:27,817
"Next door, huh?"
1015
01:10:27,990 --> 01:10:30,686
Pooky!
1016
01:10:35,731 --> 01:10:40,828
Who'd you least expect to be our
next door neighbors?
1017
01:10:41,737 --> 01:10:45,969
King Marchand and his bleached
blond Rhodes Scholar?
1018
01:10:46,842 --> 01:10:49,003
Close! You forgot Mr. Bernstein.
1019
01:10:49,345 --> 01:10:49,674
Who?
1020
01:10:49,845 --> 01:10:50,607
Mr. Bernstein.
1021
01:10:50,746 --> 01:10:54,113
The sturdy bodyguard with
the puppy dog eyes.
1022
01:10:54,416 --> 01:10:57,817
You mean King Marchand
actually is...
1023
01:10:57,953 --> 01:10:59,318
that we are only...
1024
01:10:59,455 --> 01:11:00,922
Inches apart.
1025
01:11:01,090 --> 01:11:03,752
But as my dear old grandmother
Todd used to say:
1026
01:11:03,926 --> 01:11:05,985
""In matters of sexual proximity,"
1027
01:11:06,128 --> 01:11:09,097
"an inch is as good as a mile.""
1028
01:11:11,634 --> 01:11:12,726
I don't believe this.
1029
01:11:12,868 --> 01:11:16,804
I spend most of my life hoping
to find Prince Charming.
1030
01:11:16,939 --> 01:11:18,998
Just when I decide I'm better
off being a man
1031
01:11:19,174 --> 01:11:21,699
the Prince moves in next door.
1032
01:11:21,844 --> 01:11:24,005
"Toddy, this is crazy."
1033
01:11:24,146 --> 01:11:25,977
As dear old grandmother Todd said:
1034
01:11:26,115 --> 01:11:29,084
""It's a crazy world,
so watch your step,"
1035
01:11:29,385 --> 01:11:32,479
"or you're liable to fall off.""
1036
01:11:32,621 --> 01:11:33,588
Good night.
1037
01:11:33,756 --> 01:11:34,950
I'll be up.
1038
01:11:35,090 --> 01:11:36,887
Warm your feet!
1039
01:11:45,401 --> 01:11:57,677
Crazy world full of crazy
contradictions like a child.
1040
01:11:57,813 --> 01:12:08,519
First you drive me wild and
then you win my heart
1041
01:12:08,657 --> 01:12:13,856
with your wicked art.
1042
01:12:13,996 --> 01:12:18,899
"One minute tender,"
1043
01:12:19,034 --> 01:12:29,069
gentle then temperamental
as a summer storm.
1044
01:12:29,378 --> 01:12:35,840
Just when I believe your
heart's getting warmer
1045
01:12:36,018 --> 01:12:39,510
you're cold and you're cruel
1046
01:12:39,688 --> 01:12:47,561
"and I like a fool try to cope,"
1047
01:12:47,730 --> 01:12:59,631
try to hang on to hope.
1048
01:13:04,646 --> 01:13:06,637
Crazy world.
1049
01:13:06,782 --> 01:13:13,415
Very day the same old roller
coaster ride
1050
01:13:13,589 --> 01:13:16,057
but I've got my pride.
1051
01:13:16,358 --> 01:13:33,766
I won't give in even though
I know I'll never win.
1052
01:13:34,910 --> 01:13:56,823
How I love this crazy world.
1053
01:13:59,468 --> 01:14:02,596
Pooky!
1054
01:14:02,771 --> 01:14:09,802
"God bless mother, and
Grandma Todd, Victoria, Victor,"
1055
01:14:09,978 --> 01:14:16,008
and Mr. Bernstein. Amen.
1056
01:15:14,610 --> 01:15:15,668
"Hello, again."
1057
01:15:15,844 --> 01:15:18,335
I hope you enjoyed the first act.
1058
01:15:18,514 --> 01:15:21,677
"By now, you've probably realized
the show is based"
1059
01:15:21,850 --> 01:15:25,013
on the 1982 film of the same name.
1060
01:15:25,354 --> 01:15:26,844
"My husband, Blake dwards,"
1061
01:15:26,989 --> 01:15:28,581
"directed this play
you are watching,"
1062
01:15:28,757 --> 01:15:30,520
as well as the film.
1063
01:15:30,692 --> 01:15:33,923
This is his first Broadway
musical after a long
1064
01:15:34,096 --> 01:15:36,894
and distinguished career making
movies.
1065
01:15:37,065 --> 01:15:39,465
I loved my role in the film
1066
01:15:39,601 --> 01:15:41,899
and the chance to recreate
the role of Victor
1067
01:15:42,070 --> 01:15:46,564
and Victoria on-stage is
a dream come true.
1068
01:15:46,742 --> 01:15:50,337
"As you see, although the time
is different from our own"
1069
01:15:50,512 --> 01:15:55,040
and the characters may be a little
unusual the story deals
1070
01:15:55,384 --> 01:15:59,480
with things that give all of our
lives their real meaning.
1071
01:15:59,621 --> 01:16:01,646
"Love, friendship,"
1072
01:16:01,823 --> 01:16:04,485
and a lot of laughter as well.
1073
01:16:04,960 --> 01:16:09,761
I'm lucky to have a talented group
of actors working with me
1074
01:16:09,932 --> 01:16:12,366
and I'd like to introduce them
to you.
1075
01:16:12,501 --> 01:16:15,834
"Toddy is played by the wonderful
Tony Roberts,"
1076
01:16:16,004 --> 01:16:21,374
a film and Broadway veteran who
has twice been nominated.
1077
01:16:21,543 --> 01:16:24,410
The handsome gentleman who plays
King Marchand
1078
01:16:24,546 --> 01:16:26,707
is Michael Nouri well known
1079
01:16:26,882 --> 01:16:29,510
for his many film and
television roles.
1080
01:16:29,685 --> 01:16:33,985
Rachael York is our sexy
and hilarious Norma Cassidy.
1081
01:16:34,323 --> 01:16:37,622
Rachael has won critical raves
for her performances
1082
01:16:37,759 --> 01:16:40,592
in City of Angels and
Les Miserables.
1083
01:16:40,762 --> 01:16:45,028
There isn't enough time to
introduce the rest of my friends
1084
01:16:45,334 --> 01:16:47,894
and the cast who are incredibly
talented
1085
01:16:48,036 --> 01:16:51,301
and who have become a beloved
family.
1086
01:16:52,307 --> 01:16:54,935
"Finally, I would also like
to give credit"
1087
01:16:55,077 --> 01:16:59,514
"for the success of this show to
someone very special to me,"
1088
01:16:59,681 --> 01:17:02,673
"our composer, Henry Mancini."
1089
01:17:02,851 --> 01:17:06,014
"Henry received an Oscar for
his music in the Victor,"
1090
01:17:06,355 --> 01:17:07,686
Victoria film.
1091
01:17:07,856 --> 01:17:10,051
"He and his lyricist,
Leslie Bricusse,"
1092
01:17:10,392 --> 01:17:13,623
together with Blake dwards spent
more than three years
1093
01:17:13,762 --> 01:17:16,322
bringing this musical to life.
1094
01:17:16,732 --> 01:17:21,601
"Sadly, Henry passed away in June
of 1994."
1095
01:17:21,737 --> 01:17:26,367
This musical is a testament to
his work and his talents.
1096
01:17:26,508 --> 01:17:28,874
We could not have done it
without him.
1097
01:17:29,611 --> 01:17:31,442
"The second act will now begin,"
1098
01:17:31,580 --> 01:17:33,844
so won't you please take
your seats
1099
01:17:34,016 --> 01:17:37,315
and enjoy the conclusion
of the show.
1100
01:18:30,505 --> 01:18:32,405
"Ladies and gentlemen, once again,"
1101
01:18:32,541 --> 01:18:37,808
"Cassell's is proud to present
the toast of Paris, Victor!"
1102
01:18:53,361 --> 01:18:58,355
"I know they say of
Mary-Antoinette,"
1103
01:18:58,533 --> 01:19:04,062
my reputation is a go-getter.
1104
01:19:04,372 --> 01:19:09,742
"So, when I met Louis XVI
of Bourbon."
1105
01:19:09,878 --> 01:19:16,784
It was so disturbing I thought
a Bourbon once
1106
01:19:16,952 --> 01:19:27,726
in every while would keep me
smiling.
1107
01:19:28,497 --> 01:19:36,666
Louis says he's king of France not
by chance that I wed him.
1108
01:19:36,838 --> 01:19:40,433
They all do as Louis says.
1109
01:19:40,575 --> 01:19:50,576
"My, oh yes, I just bed him then I
recline on my chaise."
1110
01:19:50,752 --> 01:19:52,549
Who cares what they do?
1111
01:19:52,687 --> 01:19:56,680
Who cares what Louis says?
1112
01:19:58,160 --> 01:20:01,618
Louis says I misbehave.
1113
01:20:01,797 --> 01:20:05,597
Rant and rave craving trouble.
1114
01:20:05,734 --> 01:20:11,036
"If he only knew the truth
in my youth,"
1115
01:20:11,373 --> 01:20:13,671
it was double.
1116
01:20:13,842 --> 01:20:19,109
My life is a big bowl of fraises.
1117
01:20:19,414 --> 01:20:21,382
"Poor Louis, screwy."
1118
01:20:21,516 --> 01:20:25,043
Who cares what Louis says?
1119
01:20:26,121 --> 01:20:27,782
Suddenly the Revolution came
1120
01:20:27,956 --> 01:20:29,583
and my social life is not
the same.
1121
01:20:29,758 --> 01:20:33,717
So I play a very different game
living one day at a time.
1122
01:20:33,895 --> 01:20:36,557
See each day may be my last
1123
01:20:36,731 --> 01:20:41,532
I'll make each moment quite
sublime.
1124
01:20:41,670 --> 01:20:48,735
"Louis says they'll label me
the memory Antoinette,"
1125
01:20:48,877 --> 01:20:52,472
famous for her own demise.
1126
01:20:52,614 --> 01:20:56,380
"He says I should know better,"
1127
01:20:56,551 --> 01:21:01,887
good times relieve mayonnaise.
1128
01:21:02,023 --> 01:21:07,723
The worst is screwy who cares
what Louis says?
1129
01:21:13,168 --> 01:21:16,467
"Louis says she lusts and groans,"
1130
01:21:16,605 --> 01:21:20,336
stay at home all adoring.
1131
01:21:20,508 --> 01:21:25,502
"He says she should be more prim,
more like him."
1132
01:21:25,680 --> 01:21:27,739
God how boring.
1133
01:21:27,916 --> 01:21:33,513
I like my sauce bordeuxlais.
1134
01:21:33,688 --> 01:21:38,421
"They drive me cooey,
who cares what Louis says."
1135
01:21:38,593 --> 01:21:40,083
Louis says the Revolution spread.
1136
01:21:40,428 --> 01:21:41,986
Louis says I mustn't lose my head
1137
01:21:42,130 --> 01:21:44,098
and the people haven't any bread.
1138
01:21:44,399 --> 01:21:46,458
I say let 'em eat cake.
1139
01:21:46,635 --> 01:21:57,443
Louis says that kind of attitude
could be a grave mistake.
1140
01:21:57,579 --> 01:22:02,676
Louis says our timings off
this resort.
1141
01:22:02,817 --> 01:22:08,346
Their museum I say they can
go to hell.
1142
01:22:08,523 --> 01:22:11,890
"Wish him well, when you see him."
1143
01:22:12,060 --> 01:22:19,660
They're singing la Marseilles
at half past seven.
1144
01:22:19,834 --> 01:22:21,426
I'm off to heaven.
1145
01:22:21,603 --> 01:22:25,130
"So much for royalty,
so much for loyalty,"
1146
01:22:25,473 --> 01:22:34,074
so much for Louis. Seize!
1147
01:22:56,738 --> 01:22:58,865
Toddy! Toddy!
1148
01:22:59,007 --> 01:23:04,707
Ven when I was a second-rate
soprano I had a maid.
1149
01:23:04,879 --> 01:23:07,712
"A maid, who could swear you were
a second-rate soprano"
1150
01:23:07,882 --> 01:23:09,975
and not a first-class imposter.
1151
01:23:10,118 --> 01:23:11,779
You trust my dressmaker.
1152
01:23:11,920 --> 01:23:14,514
He trusts me not to reveal
certain things
1153
01:23:14,656 --> 01:23:17,489
that would embarrass his wife
and six children.
1154
01:23:17,959 --> 01:23:20,553
"You know, you should be ashamed
of yourself."
1155
01:23:20,729 --> 01:23:24,324
Shame is a second-rate emotion
invented by the pious
1156
01:23:24,499 --> 01:23:26,933
in order to exploit
the human race.
1157
01:23:27,869 --> 01:23:28,767
Who said that?
1158
01:23:28,903 --> 01:23:30,461
I said that.
1159
01:23:30,638 --> 01:23:32,003
You don't believe in shame?
1160
01:23:32,307 --> 01:23:33,672
I believe in happiness.
1161
01:23:33,808 --> 01:23:37,869
"Oh, yeah? Thinks he can
just push me around..."
1162
01:23:40,715 --> 01:23:41,079
Norma!
1163
01:23:41,383 --> 01:23:44,409
"Take your hands off me,
you big ape!"
1164
01:23:44,552 --> 01:23:46,645
"Xcuse me, I'm sorry, okay?"
1165
01:23:50,425 --> 01:23:53,360
I'd hate to bust in on you
like this.
1166
01:23:56,431 --> 01:23:58,490
Mr. Todd.
1167
01:23:58,900 --> 01:24:00,527
Shut up!
1168
01:24:01,669 --> 01:24:04,035
King is running me out of town
1169
01:24:04,339 --> 01:24:08,400
because I gave him a bad time
about Victor.
1170
01:24:08,543 --> 01:24:08,975
Norma?
1171
01:24:09,144 --> 01:24:10,771
I'll be out in a minute!
1172
01:24:23,091 --> 01:24:28,461
He's got the hots for you
1173
01:24:28,630 --> 01:24:30,894
but he's convinced you're a woman.
1174
01:24:31,032 --> 01:24:34,001
He can't face that maybe he's
got a problem.
1175
01:24:34,302 --> 01:24:36,964
That maybe he really likes guys.
1176
01:24:37,305 --> 01:24:41,435
So he can't get it up with me so
he ships me off to Chicago.
1177
01:24:41,609 --> 01:24:42,576
Norma.
1178
01:24:42,710 --> 01:24:46,840
I'm just saying goodbye.
1179
01:24:48,016 --> 01:24:49,813
Goodbye.
1180
01:24:51,052 --> 01:24:53,043
Goodbye.
1181
01:24:54,989 --> 01:24:59,824
"No hard feelings because
you are a guy, right?"
1182
01:24:59,961 --> 01:25:02,521
"Ven if you are queer, gay,"
1183
01:25:02,664 --> 01:25:03,995
I mean it's not like
1184
01:25:04,132 --> 01:25:09,536
"I'm losing out to some carnivore
female, right?"
1185
01:25:09,671 --> 01:25:10,330
Right.
1186
01:25:10,505 --> 01:25:10,937
Norma!
1187
01:25:11,106 --> 01:25:14,633
All right!
1188
01:25:17,979 --> 01:25:22,348
If you ever change your
preferences?
1189
01:25:24,919 --> 01:25:27,513
You'll be the first to know.
1190
01:25:28,923 --> 01:25:30,686
Chicago.
1191
01:25:30,859 --> 01:25:33,020
I'm in the book.
1192
01:25:35,430 --> 01:25:39,332
"Out of my way, pheasant!"
1193
01:25:44,506 --> 01:25:45,939
Norma!
1194
01:26:04,425 --> 01:26:07,485
I'm gonna have dinner with her
with him tonight.
1195
01:26:07,629 --> 01:26:08,755
So what's the big deal?
1196
01:26:08,930 --> 01:26:10,522
"It's not a big deal, all right?"
1197
01:26:10,698 --> 01:26:11,858
All right!
1198
01:26:12,000 --> 01:26:15,936
So why am I shy as a spotty faced
kid at a high school prom?
1199
01:26:16,070 --> 01:26:19,369
Why? I'll tell you why.
1200
01:26:19,507 --> 01:26:21,566
It's because I don't know where
this crazy dame
1201
01:26:21,709 --> 01:26:25,702
this Victor guy whoever he is
coming from.
1202
01:26:26,381 --> 01:26:27,678
That's why.
1203
01:26:28,917 --> 01:26:32,853
I'm a guy who knows himself
so I don't give a damn.
1204
01:26:33,021 --> 01:26:36,286
I never could be in love
with a man.
1205
01:26:36,424 --> 01:26:38,016
But what if I am?
1206
01:26:38,359 --> 01:26:39,690
"I mean, me? Ha!"
1207
01:26:39,861 --> 01:26:40,725
Gay? Ha!
1208
01:26:40,895 --> 01:26:43,022
"If I know I'm not,
what's the problem I got?"
1209
01:26:43,364 --> 01:26:45,559
Why do I feel this way?
1210
01:26:45,733 --> 01:26:49,669
The only logical answer is
he's a dame.
1211
01:26:49,804 --> 01:26:53,433
I know that I'm right I can tell
from the way that I feel.
1212
01:26:53,608 --> 01:26:54,575
Yeah.
1213
01:26:54,709 --> 01:26:58,770
So maybe the way to play it is to
go along with the game
1214
01:26:58,947 --> 01:27:01,438
and if for some dumb reason
I'm wrong.
1215
01:27:01,583 --> 01:27:04,484
Is it such a big deal? Yeah.
1216
01:27:05,987 --> 01:27:09,821
"I've never been wrong about dames,
not once in my life."
1217
01:27:09,958 --> 01:27:13,052
If I had been you can bet I'd be
stuck with a wife.
1218
01:27:13,394 --> 01:27:16,420
"But not me, not King."
1219
01:27:16,598 --> 01:27:22,002
My life has been one sweet
perpetual fling.
1220
01:27:22,904 --> 01:27:26,772
"I've played so many games,"
1221
01:27:26,908 --> 01:27:29,536
fanned the flames with loads
of dames
1222
01:27:29,677 --> 01:27:31,406
and I've landed the blame
1223
01:27:31,579 --> 01:27:34,946
for each dame who claims
I've tricked her.
1224
01:27:36,684 --> 01:27:42,247
But now at last
I'm in love with Victor.
1225
01:27:44,025 --> 01:27:46,994
Maybe I should see a doctor
or concoct a cocamammey
1226
01:27:47,295 --> 01:27:48,592
tale to get me out of town.
1227
01:27:48,763 --> 01:27:51,732
Maybe take a long vacation with
some appetizing chick
1228
01:27:51,899 --> 01:27:54,732
to lift me up when I am down.
1229
01:27:55,336 --> 01:27:58,362
"Or maybe I should face the music,"
1230
01:27:58,506 --> 01:28:02,374
give up dames like Mame and Margo
1231
01:28:02,510 --> 01:28:07,072
and take on board this strange
new cargo.
1232
01:28:07,382 --> 01:28:13,480
Did a Othello fancy lago?
1233
01:28:13,655 --> 01:28:18,092
I'll take Victor to Chicago and
we'll see what happens then.
1234
01:28:18,426 --> 01:28:22,362
When I'm out with him and eight
or ten of the world's
1235
01:28:22,497 --> 01:28:26,661
no question most obnoxious men.
1236
01:28:31,906 --> 01:28:36,002
I'd like you to meet my beautiful
boyfriend Victor.
1237
01:28:36,311 --> 01:28:38,370
How would it sound out
at the stadium?
1238
01:28:38,513 --> 01:28:40,447
How would it look at the
racetrack?
1239
01:28:40,615 --> 01:28:41,377
I could just see out
1240
01:28:41,516 --> 01:28:44,417
at the ballpark Tony Palermo
give me the eye
1241
01:28:44,552 --> 01:28:48,454
when I waltz in with a guy.
1242
01:28:48,589 --> 01:28:56,963
"Of all God's gorgeous creatures
who play tag with my libido,"
1243
01:28:57,098 --> 01:29:04,630
I have to pick the queen of drag
who dresses in a tuxedo.
1244
01:29:04,806 --> 01:29:08,572
"I'd like you to meet my lover
not Norma, Victor."
1245
01:29:08,710 --> 01:29:11,076
What would they think out
at the golf club?
1246
01:29:11,412 --> 01:29:13,277
What would they say down
at the nightclub?
1247
01:29:13,414 --> 01:29:16,611
Here's what they'd say at
Guido's Steakhouse the moment
1248
01:29:16,751 --> 01:29:18,275
we were seen.
1249
01:29:18,419 --> 01:29:24,847
"Hey, you guys know that King
Marchand was a queen?"
1250
01:29:25,026 --> 01:29:26,391
It's a trick and a trap.
1251
01:29:26,561 --> 01:29:29,428
I'm not taking the wrap
for a crime I didn't do.
1252
01:29:29,597 --> 01:29:31,724
I've got to make certain that
he's a she.
1253
01:29:31,866 --> 01:29:34,391
If I don't all my nightmares
could end up true.
1254
01:29:34,535 --> 01:29:36,400
There's one way to find out
for sure
1255
01:29:36,537 --> 01:29:40,405
but I haven't the guts to try
or have I?
1256
01:29:40,541 --> 01:29:43,032
"If I'm right, I'll throw
a party tonight."
1257
01:29:43,378 --> 01:29:46,939
"If I'm wrong, I think I'll die."
1258
01:29:49,751 --> 01:29:52,083
"I guess, I guess I gotta do it."
1259
01:29:52,420 --> 01:29:54,012
"Hell, there isn't that much to it."
1260
01:29:54,155 --> 01:29:57,886
I can't sit here one more minute
letting time go by.
1261
01:29:58,025 --> 01:30:01,927
I need to put an end to all this
how and why.
1262
01:30:02,096 --> 01:30:07,090
I need to know like most guys
need an alibi.
1263
01:30:07,435 --> 01:30:13,863
I'll go myself.
I just can't ask a private eye.
1264
01:30:14,041 --> 01:30:26,442
Is the girl I'm in love
with A guy?
1265
01:30:38,933 --> 01:30:40,764
Boss?
1266
01:30:49,043 --> 01:30:50,305
"Yes, Mr. Bernstein."
1267
01:30:50,445 --> 01:30:52,003
Are there any messages?
1268
01:30:52,346 --> 01:30:53,836
He did?
1269
01:30:54,015 --> 01:30:54,982
A few minutes ago?
1270
01:30:55,116 --> 01:30:58,051
"Okay, thanks."
1271
01:31:05,059 --> 01:31:06,549
Boss?
1272
01:31:35,756 --> 01:31:38,088
"You better hurry,
We only have five minutes."
1273
01:31:38,426 --> 01:31:39,484
Okay.
1274
01:31:53,841 --> 01:31:56,674
This is Mr. Todd.
Are there any messages?
1275
01:31:56,844 --> 01:31:57,674
Thank you.
1276
01:31:57,845 --> 01:32:00,814
"Would you ring Mr. Marchand's
suite, please?"
1277
01:32:16,063 --> 01:32:17,428
Shit!
1278
01:32:22,603 --> 01:32:24,628
You'll never guess
where Mr. Marchand
1279
01:32:24,805 --> 01:32:26,796
wants to take us after dinner.
1280
01:32:26,974 --> 01:32:29,841
"If I'll never guess,
I guess you better tell me."
1281
01:32:30,011 --> 01:32:31,569
Chez Louis.
1282
01:32:32,513 --> 01:32:34,310
I'd hate to be a party poop.
1283
01:32:34,482 --> 01:32:37,451
That sounds like a very bad idea
to me.
1284
01:32:37,618 --> 01:32:39,518
It's not such a bad idea.
1285
01:32:39,687 --> 01:32:42,053
You are the toast of Paris
and Labisse
1286
01:32:42,390 --> 01:32:45,450
will be too busy groveling
to recognize you.
1287
01:32:45,593 --> 01:32:50,087
"Besides, Labisse owes me
a good grovel."
1288
01:33:06,447 --> 01:33:06,811
Pardon.
1289
01:33:06,981 --> 01:33:07,504
Bon soir.
1290
01:33:07,682 --> 01:33:08,580
Bon soir.
1291
01:33:09,417 --> 01:33:10,042
See you downstairs?
1292
01:33:10,384 --> 01:33:11,715
"I'll be right there, darling."
1293
01:33:22,763 --> 01:33:25,357
"Mr. Marchand's suite, please."
1294
01:33:32,640 --> 01:33:33,834
Get that!
1295
01:33:34,842 --> 01:33:35,831
Yes?
1296
01:33:36,010 --> 01:33:37,705
See you in the lobby
in two minutes.
1297
01:33:37,845 --> 01:33:38,812
Okay.
1298
01:33:39,680 --> 01:33:40,977
Two minutes!
1299
01:36:07,094 --> 01:36:10,393
"Mr. Marchand,
would you mind if I asked..."
1300
01:36:12,133 --> 01:36:14,397
Would you mind if I asked you
a personal question?
1301
01:36:14,535 --> 01:36:16,526
I worry more about answers
than questions.
1302
01:36:16,670 --> 01:36:19,036
It's quite obvious that
Mr. Bernstein is on hand
1303
01:36:19,340 --> 01:36:21,069
to ensure your continued
good health.
1304
01:36:21,375 --> 01:36:22,342
That is not a question.
1305
01:36:22,510 --> 01:36:24,102
Why is he sitting way over there?
1306
01:36:24,411 --> 01:36:25,673
Strategic.
1307
01:36:26,113 --> 01:36:29,378
A broader field of vision and
a clearer field of fire.
1308
01:36:29,517 --> 01:36:31,576
You must have been in the army.
1309
01:36:31,719 --> 01:36:33,949
I prefer the navy myself.
1310
01:36:34,088 --> 01:36:35,487
Would you mind if I joined him?
1311
01:36:35,623 --> 01:36:36,282
He looks Ionely.
1312
01:36:36,457 --> 01:36:36,980
"No, I don't mind."
1313
01:36:37,291 --> 01:36:40,021
I promise not to inhibit
his field of fire.
1314
01:36:40,361 --> 01:36:41,828
Incorrigible.
Yes.
1315
01:36:41,962 --> 01:36:44,021
"May I buy you a drink,
Mr. Bernstein?"
1316
01:36:44,331 --> 01:36:45,593
Coffee.
1317
01:36:47,802 --> 01:36:49,394
"Ladies and gentlemen,"
1318
01:36:49,570 --> 01:36:54,530
tonight I am extremely happy
and honored.
1319
01:36:56,677 --> 01:36:58,804
We're honored to have with us
tonight
1320
01:36:58,979 --> 01:37:03,279
one of the truly great
entertainers of our time.
1321
01:37:03,417 --> 01:37:08,480
"Ladies and gentlemen,
the toast of Paris, Victor!"
1322
01:37:11,592 --> 01:37:14,755
"Perhaps, she... xcuse me,"
1323
01:37:14,929 --> 01:37:19,025
"he will honor us with a song say,"
1324
01:37:19,333 --> 01:37:22,598
"an old nglish tune, Victor?"
1325
01:37:26,106 --> 01:37:27,004
He knows.
1326
01:37:27,341 --> 01:37:27,966
He's guessing.
1327
01:37:28,108 --> 01:37:28,836
What do I do?
1328
01:37:29,009 --> 01:37:31,705
"Pull yourself together,
and act like a man."
1329
01:37:34,415 --> 01:37:35,973
Bon soir.
1330
01:37:38,018 --> 01:37:39,246
Trust me.
1331
01:37:39,386 --> 01:37:40,318
Okay.
1332
01:37:43,324 --> 01:37:43,847
You...
1333
01:37:44,024 --> 01:37:44,547
You...
1334
01:37:44,725 --> 01:37:45,589
And me
1335
01:37:45,726 --> 01:37:47,421
And me
1336
01:37:47,561 --> 01:37:56,697
We're the kind of people
other people would like to be.
1337
01:37:57,104 --> 01:37:58,036
A little strolling?
1338
01:37:58,372 --> 01:37:58,895
Why not?
1339
01:37:59,039 --> 01:38:07,811
Wandering free we present
the kind of picture people
1340
01:38:07,982 --> 01:38:12,646
are glad to see
1341
01:38:12,786 --> 01:38:21,023
and we don't care that tomorrow
comes with no guarantee.
1342
01:38:21,328 --> 01:38:28,097
We've each other for company.
1343
01:38:29,103 --> 01:38:37,772
And come what may you and me
we'll stay together.
1344
01:38:37,945 --> 01:38:45,408
"Year after year, won't we my dear?"
1345
01:38:45,586 --> 01:38:49,488
That's why we're you and me
1346
01:38:49,657 --> 01:38:50,817
Walk this way.
Okay.
1347
01:38:50,991 --> 01:38:52,458
I taught him everything he knows.
1348
01:38:52,593 --> 01:38:54,390
That's why he has so little left.
1349
01:38:54,561 --> 01:38:56,495
I'll get you for that.
1350
01:38:59,466 --> 01:39:00,398
You brought the whistle.
1351
01:39:00,534 --> 01:39:01,762
Yes.
1352
01:39:03,537 --> 01:39:04,003
Now what?
1353
01:39:04,305 --> 01:39:04,828
Watch this now.
1354
01:39:04,972 --> 01:39:05,631
I am watching.
1355
01:39:05,806 --> 01:39:06,534
I will do this twice.
1356
01:39:06,674 --> 01:39:08,505
"Okay, now what?"
1357
01:39:12,579 --> 01:39:14,308
You devil you.
1358
01:39:16,650 --> 01:39:18,311
Watch me.
1359
01:39:19,687 --> 01:39:20,881
We finished together.
1360
01:39:21,055 --> 01:39:22,386
Yes.
1361
01:39:25,826 --> 01:39:26,952
"You're on your own, kid."
1362
01:39:27,094 --> 01:39:28,391
What?
1363
01:39:28,562 --> 01:39:30,029
"Toddy,"
1364
01:39:30,331 --> 01:39:34,097
you do this to me all the time!
1365
01:39:46,447 --> 01:39:54,752
"Come what may,
you and me we'll stay together."
1366
01:39:54,922 --> 01:40:01,851
Year after year won't we my dear.
1367
01:40:01,996 --> 01:40:06,365
That's why we're you and
1368
01:40:21,081 --> 01:40:22,548
Hey!
1369
01:40:22,683 --> 01:40:24,150
Stop that!
1370
01:40:26,820 --> 01:40:29,050
Oh my God!
1371
01:40:47,041 --> 01:40:48,508
Come On.
1372
01:41:07,161 --> 01:41:08,719
"You, imbecile."
1373
01:41:08,862 --> 01:41:10,352
This is my club!
1374
01:41:10,497 --> 01:41:12,465
And this is my club!
1375
01:41:32,086 --> 01:41:34,953
I don't care if you are a man.
1376
01:41:45,566 --> 01:41:48,034
I'm not a man.
1377
01:41:48,335 --> 01:41:50,030
I still don't care.
1378
01:42:03,450 --> 01:42:06,419
Paris by night.
1379
01:42:06,587 --> 01:42:09,784
Paris la nuit.
1380
01:42:09,957 --> 01:42:15,088
Seduces us in ways
we don't expect to be.
1381
01:42:15,395 --> 01:42:27,865
She has magic from which
even a Houdini can't be free.
1382
01:42:28,742 --> 01:42:34,977
For Paris by night has mystery.
1383
01:42:35,315 --> 01:42:40,878
It's haunted us and taunted us
through history.
1384
01:42:41,054 --> 01:42:53,592
Shady secrets she is all too
aware we long to share.
1385
01:42:54,768 --> 01:42:56,633
"That's why it is,"
1386
01:42:56,803 --> 01:43:00,466
I guess we all are adore her
1387
01:43:00,641 --> 01:43:06,637
and hunger to explore
her hidden charms.
1388
01:43:06,813 --> 01:43:12,809
She fools us all because
she's so capricious
1389
01:43:12,953 --> 01:43:24,421
and nothing's more delicious
than to sleep in her arms.
1390
01:43:24,598 --> 01:43:28,728
"For Paris by night,"
1391
01:43:28,869 --> 01:43:35,297
it's the only way to realize
that all in all
1392
01:43:35,475 --> 01:43:38,308
it's nighttime not the day.
1393
01:43:38,478 --> 01:43:45,281
"That sets her a part,
wins every heart"
1394
01:43:45,419 --> 01:43:51,983
and makes all our dreams
take flight.
1395
01:43:52,125 --> 01:43:58,428
There's no dream you can't
find in Paris.
1396
01:43:58,599 --> 01:44:07,473
Paris by night.
1397
01:44:32,532 --> 01:44:34,329
Gosh!
1398
01:44:37,304 --> 01:44:39,272
"Sorry, guys."
1399
01:44:45,712 --> 01:44:47,577
Okay.
1400
01:44:54,554 --> 01:44:56,385
Squash?
1401
01:44:59,126 --> 01:45:01,492
"Squash,
I know what you're thinking."
1402
01:45:01,628 --> 01:45:03,926
"No, you don't."
1403
01:45:04,631 --> 01:45:08,727
If a guy like you has the guts
to admit he's gay
1404
01:45:08,902 --> 01:45:11,336
so can I.
1405
01:45:14,808 --> 01:45:19,973
I know you and the Count are
gonna be very happy.
1406
01:45:45,639 --> 01:45:46,936
What's the matter?
1407
01:45:47,074 --> 01:45:47,836
Nothing.
1408
01:45:47,974 --> 01:45:48,941
This trip to Paris is turning out
to be
1409
01:45:49,076 --> 01:45:51,704
a little more bizarre than usual.
1410
01:45:52,779 --> 01:45:53,803
Thanks a lot.
1411
01:45:53,980 --> 01:45:57,313
Not you. Not you.
1412
01:45:58,652 --> 01:45:59,710
Why not me?
1413
01:45:59,886 --> 01:46:00,682
"I mean a woman,"
1414
01:46:00,854 --> 01:46:02,685
"pretending to be a man,
pretending to be a woman."
1415
01:46:02,823 --> 01:46:05,849
Well now you can stop pretending.
1416
01:46:06,026 --> 01:46:09,655
But I don't think I want to stop.
1417
01:46:09,796 --> 01:46:11,661
I'm a big star now.
1418
01:46:11,798 --> 01:46:12,492
"Oh, that."
1419
01:46:12,632 --> 01:46:13,599
"And something else,"
1420
01:46:13,767 --> 01:46:18,534
For the first time in my life
I feel emancipated.
1421
01:46:18,672 --> 01:46:19,696
Mancipated?
1422
01:46:19,840 --> 01:46:22,900
"Well, I'm my own man, so to speak."
1423
01:46:23,043 --> 01:46:24,977
You should be able to relate
to that.
1424
01:46:25,112 --> 01:46:26,443
I've got to be honest
with you right now
1425
01:46:26,580 --> 01:46:28,844
I'm having a tough time
relating to anything.
1426
01:46:30,517 --> 01:46:31,882
Do you think it would be fair
for me
1427
01:46:32,018 --> 01:46:34,282
to ask you to give up your job?
1428
01:46:34,454 --> 01:46:35,284
It would be ridiculous.
1429
01:46:35,422 --> 01:46:36,787
But you expect me to give up mine.
1430
01:46:36,923 --> 01:46:37,855
Well there's a big difference.
1431
01:46:37,991 --> 01:46:39,583
I'm not pretending to be
somebody else.
1432
01:46:39,726 --> 01:46:41,455
Now what if the shoe was
on the other foot?
1433
01:46:41,595 --> 01:46:42,061
"If you were the man,"
1434
01:46:42,396 --> 01:46:44,523
and I the woman pretending
to be a man?
1435
01:46:44,698 --> 01:46:46,723
Love is a two-way street.
1436
01:46:46,900 --> 01:46:48,959
I can't believe I said that.
1437
01:46:49,736 --> 01:46:52,967
"So, what do we do?"
1438
01:46:53,306 --> 01:46:55,399
You want me to be honest?
1439
01:46:55,575 --> 01:46:56,667
Always.
1440
01:46:56,843 --> 01:46:59,368
I could never live like that.
1441
01:47:00,313 --> 01:47:02,747
Because you are frightened
that people would think
1442
01:47:02,883 --> 01:47:05,511
you were in love with a man.
1443
01:47:06,052 --> 01:47:07,849
Right.
1444
01:47:08,955 --> 01:47:13,654
"So, we have a problem."
1445
01:47:14,895 --> 01:47:17,056
I guess we have.
1446
01:47:19,065 --> 01:47:28,440
What we have here is almost
a love song.
1447
01:47:28,575 --> 01:47:36,914
"I'm perfect for you,
you're perfect for me."
1448
01:47:37,083 --> 01:47:45,821
Verything they sing about
we have in profusion.
1449
01:47:45,959 --> 01:47:52,023
The same sense of humor...
1450
01:47:52,365 --> 01:47:58,895
a romance more than mere illusion.
1451
01:48:00,807 --> 01:48:04,743
So why are we almost a love song?
1452
01:48:04,878 --> 01:48:08,712
Why aren't we the song
of the year?
1453
01:48:08,849 --> 01:48:12,785
Does the moment go by?
1454
01:48:12,919 --> 01:48:17,083
Are we frightened to try?
1455
01:48:17,424 --> 01:48:22,020
"If we are, more is the pity"
1456
01:48:22,329 --> 01:48:32,864
For the idea seems too pretty
to be almost a love song.
1457
01:48:33,006 --> 01:48:37,966
You owe me a love song
1458
01:48:38,311 --> 01:48:53,250
So where is my love song my dear?
1459
01:48:54,394 --> 01:48:56,487
Perhaps it's for the best.
1460
01:48:56,630 --> 01:48:59,030
That's as bad as love is a
two-way street.
1461
01:48:59,366 --> 01:49:00,355
"Sooner or later,"
1462
01:49:00,534 --> 01:49:03,697
I'd probably ask you to stop
being a gangster
1463
01:49:03,837 --> 01:49:07,466
because I was frightened everybody
would think I was your mob.
1464
01:49:07,641 --> 01:49:08,869
I am not a gangster.
1465
01:49:09,009 --> 01:49:11,534
"Oh, just a businessman
with a bodyguard?"
1466
01:49:11,678 --> 01:49:13,646
"A businessman who does business
with gangsters,"
1467
01:49:13,813 --> 01:49:16,043
I better have a bodyguard or
he's out of business.
1468
01:49:16,383 --> 01:49:20,717
A businessman who does business
with gangsters claiming
1469
01:49:20,887 --> 01:49:22,878
he's not a gangster.
1470
01:49:23,056 --> 01:49:26,651
Sounds a lot like the kind
of act I do.
1471
01:49:26,793 --> 01:49:29,762
I think we're both pretenders
1472
01:49:29,930 --> 01:49:33,832
and that's not a very good basis
for a relationship.
1473
01:49:35,368 --> 01:49:40,305
"But it was fun, while it lasted."
1474
01:49:49,015 --> 01:49:51,575
One thing's clear here
1475
01:49:51,751 --> 01:49:52,877
It's clear
1476
01:49:53,053 --> 01:49:54,577
We're almost a love song
1477
01:49:54,754 --> 01:49:56,745
We're almost a love song
1478
01:49:56,923 --> 01:49:58,515
She's so good for me
1479
01:49:58,658 --> 01:50:00,785
I'm no good for him
1480
01:50:00,961 --> 01:50:02,690
I'm no good for her
1481
01:50:02,829 --> 01:50:08,028
He's so good for me.
I imagined somebody
1482
01:50:08,168 --> 01:50:09,692
I saw someone
1483
01:50:09,869 --> 01:50:11,894
Who'd look at things my way
1484
01:50:12,038 --> 01:50:14,131
We'd travel life's highway
1485
01:50:14,441 --> 01:50:16,500
Whatever the weather
1486
01:50:16,676 --> 01:50:19,577
But I wonder whether
1487
01:50:19,746 --> 01:50:27,949
The two of us should be together
1488
01:50:28,121 --> 01:50:32,285
So why are we almost a love song?
1489
01:50:32,425 --> 01:50:33,585
Are we a love song?
1490
01:50:33,760 --> 01:50:35,955
Instead of the song of the year?
1491
01:50:36,129 --> 01:50:40,498
Not a good one I fear.
Will the moment go by?
1492
01:50:40,634 --> 01:50:45,333
Will I lose him?
Are we frightened to try?
1493
01:50:45,505 --> 01:50:47,735
Mustn't lose her
1494
01:50:47,874 --> 01:50:50,365
If I am
If I do
1495
01:50:50,543 --> 01:50:53,808
Then it's tragic.
1496
01:50:53,947 --> 01:51:03,049
He and I have too much magic
1497
01:51:03,390 --> 01:51:05,756
To be almost a love song
1498
01:51:05,925 --> 01:51:07,893
"Hell, I might as well face it"
1499
01:51:08,061 --> 01:51:11,053
You owe me a love song
1500
01:51:11,364 --> 01:51:14,629
I could never replace it
1501
01:51:14,768 --> 01:51:39,491
So where is our love song my dear?
1502
01:51:54,374 --> 01:51:56,774
You slept with him!
1503
01:51:57,777 --> 01:51:58,641
Yes.
1504
01:51:58,778 --> 01:52:00,609
But it wasn't great.
1505
01:52:00,747 --> 01:52:03,739
It was sensational.
1506
01:52:03,917 --> 01:52:06,385
Then what are you doing here?
1507
01:52:07,620 --> 01:52:10,088
He has cold feet.
1508
01:52:10,423 --> 01:52:13,324
"Factually, or figuratively?"
1509
01:52:13,460 --> 01:52:16,088
Both. A Present.
1510
01:52:26,606 --> 01:52:28,506
"Mr. Bernstein, come in, come in."
1511
01:52:28,641 --> 01:52:29,767
"Good evening, Mr. Todd."
1512
01:52:29,909 --> 01:52:30,841
Champagne?
1513
01:52:31,010 --> 01:52:32,034
Don't mind if I do.
1514
01:52:32,345 --> 01:52:34,939
To what do we owe the pleasure
of your visit?
1515
01:52:35,081 --> 01:52:38,573
I have something to tell you.
1516
01:52:38,718 --> 01:52:40,481
I'm all ears.
1517
01:52:40,653 --> 01:52:42,450
I'm gay.
1518
01:52:44,090 --> 01:52:46,615
"Be still, my heart!"
1519
01:52:48,762 --> 01:52:49,751
Does your boss know?
1520
01:52:49,929 --> 01:52:51,521
I just told him.
1521
01:52:51,998 --> 01:52:54,057
"And how do you feel,
Mr. Bernstein,"
1522
01:52:54,367 --> 01:52:56,358
now that you've hoisted
your true colors?
1523
01:52:56,503 --> 01:52:57,527
"Scared, I guess."
1524
01:52:57,670 --> 01:52:58,602
"Well, naturally."
1525
01:52:58,738 --> 01:53:03,300
And sort of like it's my birthday.
1526
01:53:03,476 --> 01:53:06,570
"Well, that's because it is
in a way."
1527
01:53:10,917 --> 01:53:12,009
Speak of the devil.
1528
01:53:12,152 --> 01:53:12,811
Where is she?
1529
01:53:12,952 --> 01:53:13,543
Upstairs.
1530
01:53:13,720 --> 01:53:14,744
She?
1531
01:53:14,921 --> 01:53:17,719
It's a long and complicated story.
1532
01:53:25,832 --> 01:53:28,596
"How long have you been, you know?"
1533
01:53:29,669 --> 01:53:33,332
"I can't remember when I wasn't,
you know?"
1534
01:53:33,840 --> 01:53:36,070
But I've know you 15 years.
1535
01:53:36,376 --> 01:53:39,038
You were an All-American center
for Notre Dame.
1536
01:53:39,345 --> 01:53:41,313
A center!
1537
01:53:49,355 --> 01:53:52,017
"Happy Birthday, Mr. Bernstein."
1538
01:53:52,325 --> 01:53:54,691
Call me Squash.
1539
01:53:55,028 --> 01:53:56,859
Must I?
1540
01:54:07,507 --> 01:54:10,340
I think we should try living
together.
1541
01:54:11,477 --> 01:54:14,378
Your place or mine?
1542
01:54:44,811 --> 01:54:51,842
"Trendy travelers tend to talk
of London,"
1543
01:54:52,018 --> 01:54:55,920
"Paris, Rome, New York."
1544
01:54:56,089 --> 01:55:01,755
Like only they were stylish
and unique
1545
01:55:01,928 --> 01:55:08,458
but out in the mid-west is
the city I love the best.
1546
01:55:08,635 --> 01:55:14,471
A town so smart its spelling
starts with
1547
01:55:15,842 --> 01:55:16,934
C
1548
01:55:17,110 --> 01:55:24,642
"C-H-l-C, Chic."
1549
01:55:27,887 --> 01:55:30,048
"Chicago, Illinois,"
1550
01:55:30,390 --> 01:55:32,620
is like a shiny toy.
1551
01:55:32,759 --> 01:55:38,026
The Prairie State is proud to
state that it's its pride and joy.
1552
01:55:38,364 --> 01:55:42,300
The Windy City sweeps you
clean off your feet.
1553
01:55:42,435 --> 01:55:44,426
Its charm is complete.
1554
01:55:44,604 --> 01:55:45,764
"They're knocking you flat,"
1555
01:55:45,939 --> 01:55:49,841
this way and that on every
downtown street.
1556
01:55:51,678 --> 01:55:55,774
The White Sox and the Cubs and
other sporting clubs
1557
01:55:55,915 --> 01:56:00,443
make living here a pretty
nifty ploy.
1558
01:56:00,586 --> 01:56:04,352
Smack on the lake this is
a rare port.
1559
01:56:04,824 --> 01:56:08,988
Someday they say we'll have
an airport.
1560
01:56:09,562 --> 01:56:12,087
"When they say hey,"
1561
01:56:12,432 --> 01:56:17,893
"I'm from 'Chi' they mean Chicago,
Illinois."
1562
01:56:22,108 --> 01:56:27,910
"Not Debut, not Des Moines,"
1563
01:56:28,047 --> 01:56:30,572
not even Pittsburgh.
1564
01:57:01,381 --> 01:57:03,747
"When they say, hey,"
1565
01:57:03,883 --> 01:57:10,083
"I'm from 'Chi' they mean Chicago,
Illinois."
1566
01:57:11,391 --> 01:57:14,360
"Chicago, Illinois,
is like a shiny toy."
1567
01:57:14,527 --> 01:57:16,620
The Prairie State is proud
to state
1568
01:57:16,796 --> 01:57:17,990
it's its pride and joy.
1569
01:57:18,131 --> 01:57:20,895
The Windy City sweeps you
clean off your feet.
1570
01:57:21,067 --> 01:57:25,094
It's charm is complete they're
knocking you flat this way
1571
01:57:25,438 --> 01:57:27,633
or that on every downtown street.
1572
01:57:58,638 --> 01:58:01,732
The White Sox and the Cubs
and other sporting clubs
1573
01:58:01,908 --> 01:58:05,708
make living here a pretty
nifty ploy.
1574
01:58:05,845 --> 01:58:08,075
Smack on the lake this is
a rare port.
1575
01:58:08,381 --> 01:58:16,345
Some day they say we'll have
an airport.
1576
01:58:17,957 --> 01:58:22,621
"When they say, hey,"
1577
01:58:23,096 --> 01:58:28,728
"I'm from 'Chi' they mean Chicago,
Illinois."
1578
01:58:29,535 --> 01:58:31,935
Chicago is a killer.
1579
01:58:32,939 --> 01:58:38,502
"They mean Chicago, Illinois."
1580
01:58:38,644 --> 01:58:55,960
"C-H-l-C-A-G-O,"
1581
01:58:56,529 --> 01:58:57,826
Illinois
1582
01:59:21,554 --> 01:59:23,784
"Hi, Sal."
1583
01:59:34,400 --> 01:59:36,868
Thanks for coming.
1584
01:59:38,871 --> 01:59:41,863
So how come you're here and
King's still in Paris?
1585
01:59:42,008 --> 01:59:46,604
That's what I wanted to talk
to you about seeing
1586
01:59:46,746 --> 01:59:48,805
how he's your partner.
1587
01:59:48,981 --> 01:59:51,848
What's he done? Got himself
another doll?
1588
01:59:51,984 --> 01:59:54,043
"No, another guy!"
1589
02:00:07,466 --> 02:00:10,026
Run that by me again.
1590
02:00:10,369 --> 02:00:13,668
King is living with a Polish
fairy.
1591
02:00:19,579 --> 02:00:20,102
Where are you going?
1592
02:00:20,413 --> 02:00:21,903
We're all going to Paris.
1593
02:00:22,081 --> 02:00:22,672
"Me, too?"
1594
02:00:22,848 --> 02:00:24,839
All means all.
1595
02:00:25,017 --> 02:00:25,847
Naturally.
1596
02:00:25,985 --> 02:00:27,009
You know French?
1597
02:00:27,153 --> 02:00:30,589
Sure. I just don't speak it.
1598
02:00:37,964 --> 02:00:39,727
I'll see you on the boat.
1599
02:01:00,620 --> 02:01:03,589
We'll drink a toast
to the new lovers.
1600
02:01:03,756 --> 02:01:06,384
"Knowing the boss,
it's not going to be easy."
1601
02:01:06,525 --> 02:01:09,016
"Knowing Victoria,
I'm inclined to agree."
1602
02:01:09,161 --> 02:01:11,823
"I am ve for ought
that I could ever read,"
1603
02:01:11,998 --> 02:01:13,932
could ever hear by tale
or history.
1604
02:01:14,100 --> 02:01:16,728
The course of true love never
did run smooth.
1605
02:01:16,869 --> 02:01:19,064
"You surprise me, Mr. Bernstein."
1606
02:01:19,372 --> 02:01:22,637
We did Midsummer Night's Dream
my junior year in college.
1607
02:01:22,775 --> 02:01:23,799
We did Hamlet.
1608
02:01:23,943 --> 02:01:26,138
I bet you were a romantic Hamlet.
1609
02:01:26,445 --> 02:01:29,437
"No, I was a clumsy Ophelia."
1610
02:01:30,583 --> 02:01:32,483
It's your move.
1611
02:01:37,757 --> 02:01:39,054
Honey.
1612
02:01:40,459 --> 02:01:45,089
We've had dinner every night
in the hotel for two weeks now.
1613
02:01:45,431 --> 02:01:49,458
I'd love to have a candlelit
supper at some romantic bistro
1614
02:01:49,635 --> 02:01:51,102
and then go dancing.
1615
02:01:51,437 --> 02:01:53,769
Dancing? Where?
1616
02:01:53,906 --> 02:01:55,931
Where two people usually
go to dance.
1617
02:01:56,108 --> 02:01:58,906
Where two men usually go to dance?
1618
02:01:59,979 --> 02:02:02,504
"Like, maybe the Ritz?"
1619
02:02:02,948 --> 02:02:07,578
"Well, I'm game if you are.
No, I'm just kidding."
1620
02:02:07,753 --> 02:02:10,449
"Don't you think I'd love
to go dancing,"
1621
02:02:10,623 --> 02:02:12,488
"to buy you a beautiful gown,"
1622
02:02:12,625 --> 02:02:15,992
to take you on my arm and
stroll you up the Champs-lysees?
1623
02:02:16,128 --> 02:02:19,757
Do you know how proud that
would make me?
1624
02:02:21,434 --> 02:02:22,423
I'm going out.
1625
02:02:22,568 --> 02:02:23,364
Out?
1626
02:02:23,536 --> 02:02:25,333
I'm gonna get exercise and
fresh air.
1627
02:02:25,504 --> 02:02:27,096
I'm worried about the boss.
1628
02:02:27,406 --> 02:02:30,375
"Yes, your boss is not a happy man
in love."
1629
02:02:30,509 --> 02:02:31,806
Is there a solution?
1630
02:02:31,977 --> 02:02:35,071
Not unless Victor reveals to
the world that he's a woman.
1631
02:02:35,381 --> 02:02:38,475
Or King finds some joy living
with a man.
1632
02:02:38,617 --> 02:02:41,518
"Darling, wait!"
1633
02:03:06,846 --> 02:03:10,805
"Living in the shadows,"
1634
02:03:10,983 --> 02:03:15,386
"hiding from the sunlight,"
1635
02:03:15,554 --> 02:03:25,020
hiding from the one light that
might help to guide you.
1636
02:03:25,164 --> 02:03:29,965
"Hiding from tomorrow,"
1637
02:03:30,302 --> 02:03:47,050
hiding from the day only brings
a sorrow that won't go away.
1638
02:03:49,588 --> 02:03:54,355
"Wandering in the darkness,"
1639
02:03:54,527 --> 02:04:02,366
living every midnight doesn't
ever rid night
1640
02:04:02,501 --> 02:04:08,701
of nightmares as love might.
1641
02:04:08,841 --> 02:04:13,301
"Life is full of dangers,"
1642
02:04:13,446 --> 02:04:21,376
strangers every turn living
in the shadows
1643
02:04:21,554 --> 02:04:25,456
there's no way to learn.
1644
02:04:25,624 --> 02:04:29,116
"The more you learn,
the more you seek,"
1645
02:04:29,395 --> 02:04:35,561
"the more you find,
the more you care,"
1646
02:04:35,701 --> 02:04:43,472
the more the world is kind.
1647
02:04:44,443 --> 02:04:52,748
"One thing I can tell you life
should be your lover,"
1648
02:04:52,885 --> 02:05:02,658
help you to discover your reason
for being.
1649
02:05:02,795 --> 02:05:20,510
Soon you will be seeing what
you're all about living
1650
02:05:20,579 --> 02:05:33,982
in the shadows you'll never
find out.
1651
02:05:35,561 --> 02:05:42,490
"Living in the shadows,"
1652
02:05:42,635 --> 02:05:57,949
I'll never find out
1653
02:06:07,126 --> 02:06:09,856
"Connect me with Mr. Todd's suite,
please."
1654
02:06:11,630 --> 02:06:16,363
"A gay, All-American center
who quotes Shakespeare"
1655
02:06:16,502 --> 02:06:18,026
and plays chess like a Russian
master.
1656
02:06:18,337 --> 02:06:20,532
"Do I dare ask, do you cook?"
1657
02:06:20,673 --> 02:06:22,470
I'm a great cook.
1658
02:06:23,776 --> 02:06:27,109
And I was about to repudiate
the good fairy.
1659
02:06:28,847 --> 02:06:30,838
She must have given herself
a hernia
1660
02:06:31,016 --> 02:06:33,280
when she made you come true.
1661
02:06:34,753 --> 02:06:35,913
Yes?
1662
02:06:36,055 --> 02:06:39,320
It's me. Can I come over?
1663
02:06:39,491 --> 02:06:42,358
Of course.
1664
02:06:42,528 --> 02:06:44,291
It's Victoria.
1665
02:06:44,430 --> 02:06:45,954
She's coming over.
1666
02:06:46,098 --> 02:06:47,963
She sounds miserable.
1667
02:06:48,100 --> 02:06:50,762
I better go check on the boss.
1668
02:06:58,944 --> 02:06:59,774
Drink?
1669
02:06:59,912 --> 02:07:01,311
No thank you.
1670
02:07:01,447 --> 02:07:02,505
Would you like me to ask again?
1671
02:07:02,681 --> 02:07:03,978
You look like you could use one.
1672
02:07:04,316 --> 02:07:07,945
Toddy. It's not working out.
1673
02:07:08,087 --> 02:07:09,520
Did you really think it would?
1674
02:07:09,655 --> 02:07:11,987
Yes! At least I hoped it would.
1675
02:07:12,124 --> 02:07:14,524
It's been my experience that
when it comes to affairs
1676
02:07:14,660 --> 02:07:16,719
of the heart hope is never enough.
1677
02:07:16,895 --> 02:07:19,420
I just wanted to go dancing.
1678
02:07:19,598 --> 02:07:20,690
"Where, at the Ritz?"
1679
02:07:20,833 --> 02:07:22,425
I know. I know.
1680
02:07:22,601 --> 02:07:25,593
Two men dancing at the Ritz
wouldn't be orthodox.
1681
02:07:25,771 --> 02:07:29,070
"No, but the problem isn't two men
dancing at the Ritz."
1682
02:07:29,341 --> 02:07:30,638
It isn't?
1683
02:07:30,809 --> 02:07:33,937
The problem is you're not
really two men.
1684
02:07:36,815 --> 02:07:40,649
I don't want to be a man anymore.
1685
02:07:40,786 --> 02:07:43,778
"I know, neither do I."
1686
02:07:46,325 --> 02:07:47,019
"Hi, Sal."
1687
02:07:47,359 --> 02:07:51,921
I thought I'd pay my old business
partner a friendly visit.
1688
02:07:52,097 --> 02:07:53,029
"He's not here, Sal."
1689
02:07:53,365 --> 02:07:56,027
Oh yeah? Where is he?
Shacked up with the Count?
1690
02:07:56,335 --> 02:07:58,303
He said something about
the Arctic Circle.
1691
02:07:58,470 --> 02:08:02,304
"Sure, and I'm the Moaning Lisa."
1692
02:08:09,515 --> 02:08:11,642
You gonna tell me where
your boss is
1693
02:08:11,784 --> 02:08:13,479
or do I let Juke shoot you?
1694
02:08:13,619 --> 02:08:15,348
"Xcuse me, boss. Remember?"
1695
02:08:15,521 --> 02:08:16,954
It's my turn.
1696
02:08:17,890 --> 02:08:19,755
"Yeah. Right, I'm sorry."
1697
02:08:19,925 --> 02:08:21,654
"You know,
we've been so busy lately,"
1698
02:08:21,794 --> 02:08:25,491
I keep forgetting
who is supposed to shoot whom.
1699
02:08:25,631 --> 02:08:27,360
Who.
1700
02:08:28,867 --> 02:08:29,561
What?
1701
02:08:29,735 --> 02:08:30,929
"You can't say"whom""
1702
02:08:31,270 --> 02:08:34,262
because there ain't no proposition
in front of it.
1703
02:08:39,411 --> 02:08:40,469
Isn't.
1704
02:08:40,646 --> 02:08:41,544
Any.
1705
02:08:41,680 --> 02:08:42,237
What?
1706
02:08:42,381 --> 02:08:43,313
Isn't any
1707
02:08:43,482 --> 02:08:43,971
Preposition.
1708
02:08:44,316 --> 02:08:45,874
Shut up!
1709
02:08:47,820 --> 02:08:50,789
"Now, Squash, for the last time
where is your boss?"
1710
02:08:50,923 --> 02:08:52,356
Mr. Marchand's suite.
1711
02:08:52,524 --> 02:08:54,321
"Sal,
I swear on my mother's grave..."
1712
02:08:54,493 --> 02:08:55,517
Your mother's still alive.
1713
02:08:55,694 --> 02:08:56,023
You're kidding?
1714
02:08:56,328 --> 02:08:57,386
Shoot him.
1715
02:08:57,830 --> 02:08:59,627
Hold it.
1716
02:09:01,633 --> 02:09:03,624
Yeah?
1717
02:09:05,370 --> 02:09:06,928
Hello?
1718
02:09:08,307 --> 02:09:11,572
"Who's"par laying", please?"
1719
02:09:12,611 --> 02:09:13,441
Dumb French.
1720
02:09:13,579 --> 02:09:16,309
Don't even understand
their own language.
1721
02:09:17,816 --> 02:09:20,785
The Windy City barracuda is back.
1722
02:09:21,353 --> 02:09:21,751
What Norma?
1723
02:09:21,887 --> 02:09:22,581
Stay here.
1724
02:09:22,721 --> 02:09:24,052
"No! Toddy, not on your life!"
1725
02:09:24,389 --> 02:09:25,947
"Wait for me, Toddy! Wait for me."
1726
02:09:26,091 --> 02:09:27,649
"Hello Squash,
do I let Clam shoot you?"
1727
02:09:27,826 --> 02:09:29,885
"Personally,
I think it would be a big mistake."
1728
02:09:30,062 --> 02:09:30,653
For who?
1729
02:09:30,796 --> 02:09:31,319
Whom.
1730
02:09:31,463 --> 02:09:32,953
Shoot her!
1731
02:09:33,132 --> 02:09:34,997
Hold it!
1732
02:09:36,668 --> 02:09:37,692
"Good to see you, Sal."
1733
02:09:37,836 --> 02:09:39,736
What brings you to Paris?
1734
02:09:39,872 --> 02:09:42,500
Fairy tales.
1735
02:09:43,509 --> 02:09:47,912
"Well, well, well, if it ain't
big shot King Marchand,"
1736
02:09:48,046 --> 02:09:51,914
who these days maybe ought
to change it to Queen.
1737
02:09:52,484 --> 02:09:54,315
Did somebody call?
1738
02:09:54,987 --> 02:09:55,954
Here he is.
1739
02:09:56,088 --> 02:09:59,114
"He's the Count and he's Mr. Todd,"
1740
02:09:59,458 --> 02:10:02,052
"the Count's former lover,
you know."
1741
02:10:02,795 --> 02:10:04,990
A bunch of queers.
1742
02:10:05,164 --> 02:10:08,531
Two queers doth not a bunch make.
1743
02:10:18,911 --> 02:10:21,379
They prefer gay.
1744
02:10:21,547 --> 02:10:23,708
"If you want the truth,
ask the Count."
1745
02:10:23,882 --> 02:10:24,576
Ask me what?
1746
02:10:24,750 --> 02:10:25,079
Ask him.
1747
02:10:25,417 --> 02:10:26,042
I already know the answer.
1748
02:10:26,385 --> 02:10:26,749
Norma!
1749
02:10:26,919 --> 02:10:28,045
Are you and the King lovers?
1750
02:10:28,187 --> 02:10:28,710
Yes!
1751
02:10:28,887 --> 02:10:30,479
Oh yuck.
1752
02:10:31,957 --> 02:10:32,946
I love him very much.
1753
02:10:33,091 --> 02:10:34,558
"Hear, hear!"
1754
02:10:34,693 --> 02:10:35,318
God!
1755
02:10:35,460 --> 02:10:39,920
"I'm gonna throw up!
Here, sign this."
1756
02:10:41,033 --> 02:10:42,057
Okay if I read it first?
1757
02:10:42,401 --> 02:10:42,765
What for?
1758
02:10:42,935 --> 02:10:45,460
"Since the mob don't like
doing business with homos,"
1759
02:10:45,637 --> 02:10:46,831
I'm buying you out.
1760
02:10:47,005 --> 02:10:48,529
You know my half is worth
ten times as much.
1761
02:10:48,674 --> 02:10:50,869
"Yeah, right. Sign the paper."
1762
02:10:51,043 --> 02:10:52,806
"Darling, don't do it."
1763
02:10:52,978 --> 02:10:53,910
"It's okay, sweetheart."
1764
02:10:54,046 --> 02:10:54,944
Darling?
1765
02:10:55,080 --> 02:10:55,774
Sweetheart?
1766
02:10:55,914 --> 02:10:58,644
Jesus King. That is disgusting.
1767
02:10:58,784 --> 02:11:00,308
A guy like you turning queer.
1768
02:11:00,485 --> 02:11:02,953
"I mean, we grew up together."
1769
02:11:03,088 --> 02:11:05,318
Probably had something to do
with it.
1770
02:11:11,730 --> 02:11:14,324
"Oh, God!"
1771
02:11:15,400 --> 02:11:17,425
That's it. That is it!
1772
02:11:17,603 --> 02:11:20,834
"Come with me, young woman."
1773
02:11:21,006 --> 02:11:23,099
You know what I have to do.
1774
02:11:23,408 --> 02:11:25,069
Go on. Get up there.
1775
02:11:26,111 --> 02:11:26,873
I'll tell you!
1776
02:11:27,045 --> 02:11:30,481
Wait! Lock the door.
1777
02:11:38,090 --> 02:11:40,718
It's not going to take that long.
1778
02:11:41,760 --> 02:11:43,625
Would anybody care for a drink?
1779
02:11:43,762 --> 02:11:46,356
"Sal, you're looking
a might peaked."
1780
02:11:46,498 --> 02:11:49,558
"Sal, is that short for Sally?"
1781
02:11:52,471 --> 02:11:54,496
"You are going to regret this,
King."
1782
02:11:54,673 --> 02:11:56,538
"And you, Squash, for shame"
1783
02:11:56,675 --> 02:11:59,109
hanging around with a bunch
of fairies.
1784
02:12:04,783 --> 02:12:06,512
"You no good, two timing,"
1785
02:12:06,652 --> 02:12:09,382
son of a bitch. He's a woman!
1786
02:12:09,554 --> 02:12:14,048
"Yes, yes, yes. Oh my God!"
1787
02:12:15,460 --> 02:12:16,392
"Sweetheart, what happened?"
1788
02:12:16,561 --> 02:12:18,051
"Look, look darling,
Labisse is right there."
1789
02:12:18,363 --> 02:12:19,057
"Look, look.
Toddy, look after her."
1790
02:12:19,364 --> 02:12:21,628
"Toddy, Labisse was just outside
the window."
1791
02:12:21,767 --> 02:12:22,631
"Fear not, dear lady!"
1792
02:12:22,768 --> 02:12:24,599
I've been prepared for this
for a long time.
1793
02:12:24,736 --> 02:12:25,930
"No, Toddy."
1794
02:12:26,071 --> 02:12:29,734
He saw the whole kit and caboodle.
1795
02:12:29,908 --> 02:12:33,071
I can't vouch for the kit
but the caboodle's a winner.
1796
02:12:34,579 --> 02:12:37,980
Trust me. Dinner after the show?
1797
02:12:38,317 --> 02:12:39,682
Love to!
1798
02:12:47,092 --> 02:12:51,688
"Oh, no. Not you, too!"
1799
02:12:52,664 --> 02:12:55,292
What ever happened to the real men
1800
02:12:55,467 --> 02:12:56,661
in this world?
1801
02:12:56,802 --> 02:12:59,965
I might as well become a nun.
1802
02:13:00,906 --> 02:13:02,464
A nun?
1803
02:13:03,375 --> 02:13:05,639
What's wrong with that?
1804
02:13:05,811 --> 02:13:08,746
My mother was a nun!
1805
02:13:18,623 --> 02:13:20,921
Her mother was a nun?
1806
02:13:21,093 --> 02:13:23,584
"If you did not have that gun,"
1807
02:13:23,729 --> 02:13:26,960
I would personally take you apart.
1808
02:13:27,132 --> 02:13:27,689
That's the truth.
1809
02:13:27,833 --> 02:13:28,925
"Absolutely, boss."
1810
02:13:29,067 --> 02:13:30,398
A Little pop.
1811
02:13:31,703 --> 02:13:34,399
"Go ahead, boss, he's a pansy,
can't fight."
1812
02:13:34,573 --> 02:13:35,005
Shut up.
1813
02:13:35,307 --> 02:13:36,296
I've seen him fight once.
1814
02:13:36,475 --> 02:13:36,907
Shut up!
1815
02:13:37,075 --> 02:13:38,599
Remember when he beat up
the whole Michigan back...
1816
02:13:38,777 --> 02:13:41,337
All right! Shut up!
1817
02:13:47,886 --> 02:13:50,684
You're lucky I got a boat
to catch.
1818
02:13:51,323 --> 02:13:52,881
Let's go.
1819
02:13:57,729 --> 02:13:59,697
Welcome.
1820
02:14:16,948 --> 02:14:20,008
"Put me through to Mr. Todd,
please."
1821
02:14:31,930 --> 02:14:32,521
Hello?
1822
02:14:32,697 --> 02:14:34,289
You all right?
1823
02:14:34,966 --> 02:14:36,433
Never better.
1824
02:14:36,601 --> 02:14:37,533
That's great.
1825
02:14:37,669 --> 02:14:39,637
"If you need anything,
I'll be in my room."
1826
02:14:39,805 --> 02:14:41,272
"Thanks, Squash."
1827
02:14:41,440 --> 02:14:43,533
"Anytime, Victoria."
1828
02:14:46,044 --> 02:14:53,780
The more I learn the more
I seek the more I find.
1829
02:14:53,919 --> 02:15:02,327
The more I care the more
the world is kind.
1830
02:15:04,596 --> 02:15:12,765
"One thing I can tell you,
life should be your lover."
1831
02:15:12,904 --> 02:15:21,972
Help you to discover your reason
for being.
1832
02:15:22,114 --> 02:15:31,887
Soon you'll be seeing
what you're all about.
1833
02:15:32,057 --> 02:15:43,434
Living in the shadows
you'll never find out.
1834
02:15:43,602 --> 02:16:01,613
Push away the shadows
the sun will come out!
1835
02:16:17,068 --> 02:16:19,366
"Once again, ladies and gentlemen,"
1836
02:16:19,504 --> 02:16:21,734
"it is with great pleasure
that I announce,"
1837
02:16:21,873 --> 02:16:23,363
"for your great pleasure,"
1838
02:16:23,508 --> 02:16:26,068
the world foremost female
impersonator.
1839
02:16:26,378 --> 02:16:27,777
But it is also with some
sadness that
1840
02:16:27,913 --> 02:16:32,680
I must tell you that Victor
has decided to retire.
1841
02:16:32,851 --> 02:16:37,015
What you're about to see will be
his last performance!
1842
02:17:07,118 --> 02:17:11,384
A thousand artists have done their
damnest to paint her
1843
02:17:11,556 --> 02:17:14,354
but all in vain.
1844
02:17:14,492 --> 02:17:17,689
"And every day their hopes grow
fainter,"
1845
02:17:17,829 --> 02:17:20,093
the reason's plain.
1846
02:17:20,432 --> 02:17:24,334
For Victoria's also know
as Victor Making
1847
02:17:24,502 --> 02:17:26,936
it tricky to depict her.
1848
02:17:27,105 --> 02:17:32,509
"Victor, Victoria! Victor,
Victoria!"
1849
02:17:32,644 --> 02:17:37,707
"Victoria, what a victor you are."
1850
02:17:37,849 --> 02:17:43,788
She spreads her fusion
her illusion is serene.
1851
02:17:43,922 --> 02:17:49,690
"Behind the screen,
is he a king or is she a queen?"
1852
02:17:49,828 --> 02:17:51,796
She's such a tease.
1853
02:17:51,930 --> 02:17:56,026
Fellows like these trying
to please get ill at ease.
1854
02:17:56,334 --> 02:18:02,273
Not sure if he's Louis or Louise.
1855
02:18:02,440 --> 02:18:05,603
No wonder thousands
of lovers struggle
1856
02:18:05,744 --> 02:18:08,975
to win her without success.
1857
02:18:09,314 --> 02:18:15,014
Ven an evening having dinner
she won't say yes
1858
02:18:15,320 --> 02:18:18,721
and God help the guy
who ever tricked her.
1859
02:18:18,890 --> 02:18:21,586
Kiss 'em goodbye
if they afflict her.
1860
02:18:21,760 --> 02:18:27,289
"Victor, Victoria.
Victor, Victoria."
1861
02:18:27,465 --> 02:18:32,300
"Victoria, what a victor you are."
1862
02:18:40,745 --> 02:18:46,274
Men are so dim fancying him
and fancying her.
1863
02:18:46,451 --> 02:18:49,352
"They're so bemused,
they get confused."
1864
02:18:49,521 --> 02:18:51,921
Which one they prefer.
1865
02:18:52,057 --> 02:18:54,321
Is he a she? Is he a she?
1866
02:18:54,492 --> 02:18:57,256
"Is she a he? If you ask me,"
1867
02:18:57,395 --> 02:18:58,259
it's hard to see.
1868
02:18:58,430 --> 02:19:00,796
Which can she be?
1869
02:19:00,932 --> 02:19:03,833
There's no guarantee.
1870
02:19:03,968 --> 02:19:07,062
And so when young men and
old men turn
1871
02:19:07,372 --> 02:19:11,069
in to bold men to hold my hand.
1872
02:19:11,376 --> 02:19:16,973
They get too frazzled and
bedazzled to understand
1873
02:19:17,315 --> 02:19:19,977
You can't contradict her
or predict him.
1874
02:19:20,118 --> 02:19:23,519
"She is the victor, not the victim."
1875
02:19:23,688 --> 02:19:29,058
"Victor, Victoria.
Victor, Victoria."
1876
02:19:29,394 --> 02:19:35,765
Charlatan! Liar! Phony! Stop!
1877
02:19:35,934 --> 02:19:37,333
"Ladies and gentlemen,"
1878
02:19:37,469 --> 02:19:40,905
you are all victims
of a cruel hoax.
1879
02:19:41,039 --> 02:19:44,008
This woman is no man.
1880
02:19:44,876 --> 02:19:47,970
"I'm man enough for you,
sweetheart!"
1881
02:19:48,813 --> 02:19:55,048
And that's why young men
and old men turn
1882
02:19:55,353 --> 02:20:00,086
into bold men to hold her hand.
1883
02:20:00,392 --> 02:20:06,888
They get too frazzled and
bedazzled to understand.
1884
02:20:07,031 --> 02:20:10,592
You can't contradict her
or predict him.
1885
02:20:10,769 --> 02:20:13,966
She is the victor not the victim.
1886
02:20:14,105 --> 02:20:17,006
"Victor, Victoria."
1887
02:20:17,175 --> 02:20:19,837
"Victor, Victoria."
1888
02:20:20,011 --> 02:20:25,039
"Victoria, what a victor you are"
1889
02:20:25,383 --> 02:20:32,653
So when a guy loves a lady
however shady it may appear.
1890
02:20:32,824 --> 02:20:35,987
No need to yell
if they're two fellows.
1891
02:20:36,127 --> 02:20:38,823
That's not so queer!
1892
02:20:38,963 --> 02:20:44,492
We're all meant to cherish
one another
1893
02:20:44,669 --> 02:20:57,070
It's not a crime to love
each other
1894
02:21:02,620 --> 02:21:05,612
"He sings, too!"
1895
02:21:06,791 --> 02:21:11,660
"Victor, Victoria,
Victor, Victoria!"
1896
02:21:11,830 --> 02:21:17,826
"Victoria, what a victor you are!"
1897
02:21:18,002 --> 02:21:24,805
"Victoria, what a victor you are""134563
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