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1
00:00:02,084 --> 00:00:03,156
Hey, did you guys know
2
00:00:03,220 --> 00:00:04,755
this year's the 40th anniversary
3
00:00:04,842 --> 00:00:07,030
- of Halloween?
- Oh, nonsense.
4
00:00:07,117 --> 00:00:08,732
Halloween traditions
of date back to the
5
00:00:08,819 --> 00:00:10,405
Celtic festival of Samhain.
6
00:00:10,492 --> 00:00:12,545
Although our current
Halloween customs
7
00:00:12,632 --> 00:00:14,708
come from the evening
before All Hallows' Day...
8
00:00:14,795 --> 00:00:16,052
All Hallows' Eve...
9
00:00:16,139 --> 00:00:17,466
Thus, Halloween.
10
00:00:17,553 --> 00:00:18,887
I meant the movie
Halloween.
11
00:00:20,349 --> 00:00:21,372
Oh.
12
00:00:21,450 --> 00:00:23,200
Well, that's not
interesting at all.
13
00:00:23,314 --> 00:00:25,255
Did you know the Michael Myers
mask from the film
14
00:00:25,342 --> 00:00:27,552
was actually a Captain Kirk mask
turned inside out?
15
00:00:27,639 --> 00:00:30,231
Okay,
now it's interesting.
16
00:00:31,203 --> 00:00:33,201
Are you guys
all dressing up for work?
17
00:00:33,288 --> 00:00:34,982
Of course. I mean,
how often do you get to wear
18
00:00:35,069 --> 00:00:36,241
costumes to work?
19
00:00:36,328 --> 00:00:39,661
Says the man with a giant
belt buckle and a dickey.
20
00:00:39,781 --> 00:00:41,413
Hey, this is not a costume.
21
00:00:41,500 --> 00:00:43,067
It's a choice.
It's a style.
22
00:00:43,154 --> 00:00:45,075
It's a tragedy.
23
00:00:45,251 --> 00:00:47,388
Bernadette, why don't we
get to dress up at work?
24
00:00:47,475 --> 00:00:49,116
We used to,
but a couple guys
25
00:00:49,203 --> 00:00:50,458
in the infectious disease lab
26
00:00:50,545 --> 00:00:52,973
went as zombies
and it triggered a quarantine.
27
00:00:54,054 --> 00:00:56,637
The CDC was so mad.
28
00:00:57,304 --> 00:00:58,896
Hey, if you really want
to dress up,
29
00:00:58,983 --> 00:01:00,161
we could throw a party.
30
00:01:00,248 --> 00:01:01,749
Oh, that would be fun.
31
00:01:01,836 --> 00:01:04,061
You know, I used to throw
Halloween parties all the time
32
00:01:04,148 --> 00:01:05,302
when I moved
into the building.
33
00:01:05,389 --> 00:01:07,973
All the time? I only
remember being invited to one.
34
00:01:08,864 --> 00:01:11,036
Please don't make this
awkward for me.
35
00:01:12,882 --> 00:01:14,520
Okay, so,
Friday night...
36
00:01:14,607 --> 00:01:16,244
- Halloween party here.
- Okay.
37
00:01:16,331 --> 00:01:17,522
Great. Can't wait.
38
00:01:17,609 --> 00:01:18,691
What are you going as?
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00:01:18,778 --> 00:01:20,350
I don't want
to ruin the surprise.
40
00:01:20,437 --> 00:01:22,005
You'll see it at work.
Just a warning:
41
00:01:22,092 --> 00:01:23,263
it's pretty scary.
42
00:01:23,350 --> 00:01:25,069
- Is it a bird?
- No.
43
00:01:25,156 --> 00:01:26,592
- Is it a dog?
- No.
44
00:01:26,679 --> 00:01:28,106
Oh, I think
I'll be fine, then.
45
00:01:33,250 --> 00:01:34,672
Hello.
46
00:01:35,987 --> 00:01:37,218
Hello.
47
00:01:38,900 --> 00:01:40,975
I see you are dressed
as Doc Brown
48
00:01:41,062 --> 00:01:42,709
from Back to the Future.
May I assume that
49
00:01:42,796 --> 00:01:44,294
Amy is going as his wife,
Clara Clayton,
50
00:01:44,381 --> 00:01:46,254
from Back to the FuturePart III?
51
00:01:47,172 --> 00:01:48,578
She is.
52
00:02:02,476 --> 00:02:04,825
Did you do something
different to your hair?
53
00:02:06,269 --> 00:02:07,601
Yes.
54
00:02:09,829 --> 00:02:11,442
Looking good.
55
00:02:15,492 --> 00:02:16,552
♪♪ Theme song plays...
56
00:02:16,639 --> 00:02:20,118
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
57
00:02:20,205 --> 00:02:23,631
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... ♪
58
00:02:23,718 --> 00:02:25,381
♪ Wait! ♪
♪ The Earth began to cool ♪
59
00:02:25,468 --> 00:02:26,879
♪ The autotrophs began to drool ♪
60
00:02:26,966 --> 00:02:28,358
♪ Neanderthals developed tools ♪
61
00:02:28,445 --> 00:02:30,309
- ♪ We built the Wall ♪
- ♪ We built the pyramids ♪
62
00:02:30,396 --> 00:02:33,155
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
63
00:02:33,242 --> 00:02:35,260
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
64
00:02:35,347 --> 00:02:37,106
♪ Bang! ♪
*THE BIG BANG THEORY*
Season 12 Episode 06
65
00:02:37,193 --> 00:02:39,442
*THE BIG BANG THEORY*
Episode Title: "The Imitation Perturbation"
66
00:02:46,644 --> 00:02:49,174
Oh, Inspector Gadget.
67
00:02:49,261 --> 00:02:50,752
And I want to say
68
00:02:50,839 --> 00:02:53,798
Supreme Court Justice
Ruth Bader Ginsburg.
69
00:02:53,885 --> 00:02:55,111
So close.
70
00:02:55,198 --> 00:02:57,221
Kooth Bader Ginsburg.
71
00:02:57,560 --> 00:02:59,312
The Notorious KBG.
72
00:02:59,823 --> 00:03:01,485
That's very clever.
73
00:03:01,572 --> 00:03:03,112
Sustained.
74
00:03:04,207 --> 00:03:06,520
Are you gonna dress in drag
in front of your fiancée?
75
00:03:06,607 --> 00:03:08,861
Yeaaaah. We have no secrets
from each other.
76
00:03:08,948 --> 00:03:11,859
Well, except for the fact that
I-I crocheted this myself.
77
00:03:18,987 --> 00:03:20,118
Hey, Sheldon.
78
00:03:20,205 --> 00:03:21,790
- Hello.
- Hello.
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00:03:26,097 --> 00:03:27,353
Oh, ho! My God,
80
00:03:27,440 --> 00:03:28,942
you look amazing.
81
00:03:29,029 --> 00:03:31,071
I find you guilty of murder,
82
00:03:31,158 --> 00:03:33,305
because you are killing it.
83
00:03:33,613 --> 00:03:34,743
Well, technically,
84
00:03:34,830 --> 00:03:36,737
the Supreme Court wouldn't
determine a defendant's
85
00:03:36,824 --> 00:03:38,235
guilt or innocence
in a criminal matter.
86
00:03:38,322 --> 00:03:40,407
They could only reverse
or revamp a jury's conviction
87
00:03:40,494 --> 00:03:42,907
based on a constitutional
or statutory issue.
88
00:03:46,539 --> 00:03:48,313
Why are you laughing?
89
00:03:48,676 --> 00:03:50,422
His statement
was factually correct.
90
00:03:52,138 --> 00:03:54,204
You're sitting in my spot.
91
00:03:55,503 --> 00:03:57,018
You don't have a spot.
92
00:03:57,105 --> 00:03:59,274
- What is wrong with you today?
- Maybe he's cranky
93
00:03:59,361 --> 00:04:01,876
because he's off
his bathroom schedule.
94
00:04:03,129 --> 00:04:05,767
Well, I can understand how that
would make someone irritable.
95
00:04:05,854 --> 00:04:09,282
Interesting fact: "irritable"
comes from the Latin,
96
00:04:09,369 --> 00:04:11,079
"susceptible to anger."
97
00:04:11,751 --> 00:04:13,206
Just because I used a word
98
00:04:13,293 --> 00:04:14,470
doesn't mean
I want its etymology.
99
00:04:14,557 --> 00:04:16,409
Interesting fact:
"etymology"
100
00:04:16,496 --> 00:04:18,938
- comes from the Greek word...
- You are being so annoying.
101
00:04:19,025 --> 00:04:20,035
Stop it.
102
00:04:20,442 --> 00:04:22,555
And why are you two laughing?
103
00:04:23,675 --> 00:04:25,321
Sheldon, he's being you.
104
00:04:25,400 --> 00:04:27,578
He's dressed as you
for Halloween.
105
00:04:39,480 --> 00:04:40,597
Oh.
106
00:04:41,332 --> 00:04:43,149
So you're not
laughing at him.
107
00:04:43,347 --> 00:04:44,987
You're laughing at me.
108
00:04:45,074 --> 00:04:46,477
We're not laughing at you.
109
00:04:46,564 --> 00:04:47,922
We're laughing with you.
110
00:04:48,465 --> 00:04:50,524
But I'm not laughing.
111
00:04:51,551 --> 00:04:53,375
Then the first one.
112
00:04:57,775 --> 00:04:59,164
Ready to go?
113
00:04:59,626 --> 00:05:01,910
Hey, why aren't you
in your costume?
114
00:05:01,997 --> 00:05:03,299
I just didn't feel like it.
115
00:05:03,386 --> 00:05:05,624
You get that I'm wearing
a corset because of you,
116
00:05:05,711 --> 00:05:07,743
not because I'm tired
of breathing?
117
00:05:09,035 --> 00:05:10,041
Amy, do you think
118
00:05:10,128 --> 00:05:11,899
I'm always correcting
other people?
119
00:05:11,986 --> 00:05:14,151
No, not all the time.
120
00:05:14,238 --> 00:05:15,416
I mean, just last week,
121
00:05:15,503 --> 00:05:17,063
Penny ended a sentence
with a preposition.
122
00:05:17,150 --> 00:05:18,672
You didn't even mention it.
123
00:05:18,759 --> 00:05:19,955
True.
124
00:05:20,042 --> 00:05:23,188
I just waited until I got home
and screamed into a pillow.
125
00:05:25,078 --> 00:05:27,172
Is something bothering you?
126
00:05:27,613 --> 00:05:30,134
Howard dressed up as me
and imitated me,
127
00:05:30,221 --> 00:05:31,586
and everyone laughed.
128
00:05:31,784 --> 00:05:34,712
Oh. Well,
that must have felt terrible.
129
00:05:34,799 --> 00:05:36,765
It did. I never realized
130
00:05:36,852 --> 00:05:39,412
my friends viewed me
as an object of ridicule.
131
00:05:39,499 --> 00:05:41,165
Oh, I don't think that's true.
132
00:05:41,252 --> 00:05:42,832
They laughed, Amy.
133
00:05:42,919 --> 00:05:45,784
In a derisive way.
Not in the instructive way
134
00:05:45,871 --> 00:05:47,938
I laugh at them
when they're being stupid.
135
00:05:51,745 --> 00:05:54,282
- Hey, hey, heyyy. Happy Halloween.
- Ohhh!
136
00:05:54,425 --> 00:05:56,242
- Trick or treat.
- No.
137
00:05:56,329 --> 00:05:58,280
Sorry, you're not
wearing a costume.
138
00:05:58,367 --> 00:06:01,955
Yeah, I am.
I'm a pharmaceutical sales rep.
139
00:06:02,556 --> 00:06:04,013
I'm gonna need more.
140
00:06:04,422 --> 00:06:07,006
Okay, failed actress
who traded constant rejection
141
00:06:07,093 --> 00:06:09,733
for a Christmas bonus
and a dental plan?
142
00:06:11,152 --> 00:06:12,904
- Go nuts.
- Oh.
143
00:06:13,300 --> 00:06:14,642
I will.
144
00:06:15,063 --> 00:06:16,811
So, what are you
wearing to the party?
145
00:06:16,898 --> 00:06:19,929
Sexy cat? Sexy nurse?
Sexy zombie?
146
00:06:20,016 --> 00:06:21,725
Why do girls' costumes
have to be sexy
147
00:06:21,812 --> 00:06:23,366
but guys' costumes don't?
148
00:06:23,843 --> 00:06:26,811
Say that again
with this helicopter on my head.
149
00:06:29,217 --> 00:06:30,861
Very cute.
150
00:06:31,025 --> 00:06:33,086
Hey, do you remember
what happened
151
00:06:33,173 --> 00:06:35,662
at that first Halloween party
that you invited me to?
152
00:06:35,749 --> 00:06:37,654
When I threw up
in the pumpkin?
153
00:06:38,879 --> 00:06:40,391
More memorable than that.
154
00:06:40,478 --> 00:06:43,103
Really?
That was pretty impressive.
155
00:06:44,554 --> 00:06:46,070
We had our first kiss.
156
00:06:46,157 --> 00:06:47,453
On this very couch.
157
00:06:47,540 --> 00:06:49,853
No, no, our first kiss was
at your birthday.
158
00:06:49,940 --> 00:06:51,219
Remember?
I threw you a party,
159
00:06:51,306 --> 00:06:53,192
you didn't make it,
and I felt bad for you.
160
00:06:54,197 --> 00:06:56,421
No, no, it was on Halloween,
161
00:06:56,508 --> 00:06:58,428
and you felt bad for me.
162
00:06:59,142 --> 00:07:00,506
If we're gonna go
through every party
163
00:07:00,593 --> 00:07:02,811
where I felt bad for you,
we're gonna be here awhile.
164
00:07:04,344 --> 00:07:05,367
Never mind.
165
00:07:05,454 --> 00:07:07,070
What? You're not mad at me,
are you?
166
00:07:07,157 --> 00:07:08,875
No. Of course not.
No, we just remember
167
00:07:08,962 --> 00:07:10,069
different things
from that party.
168
00:07:10,156 --> 00:07:11,358
I remember falling in love,
169
00:07:11,445 --> 00:07:13,210
and you remember vomiting
in a pumpkin.
170
00:07:13,297 --> 00:07:15,217
I was, like,
four feet away.
171
00:07:15,304 --> 00:07:16,957
People cheered.
172
00:07:19,182 --> 00:07:21,558
- Here you go.
- Thanks.
173
00:07:21,879 --> 00:07:24,335
So, did you see
Howard's costume?
174
00:07:24,422 --> 00:07:27,100
See it? I made it.
It was hilarious.
175
00:07:28,283 --> 00:07:31,434
Well, Sheldon didn't think so,
and neither did I.
176
00:07:31,521 --> 00:07:33,214
Oh, come on.
It was all in good fun.
177
00:07:33,301 --> 00:07:36,620
Well, I'm sure it was,
but Sheldon's feelings got hurt.
178
00:07:36,707 --> 00:07:38,798
May-Maybe Howard could apologize?
179
00:07:38,885 --> 00:07:40,404
You're kidding, right?
180
00:07:40,546 --> 00:07:41,934
Sheldon didn't apologize
181
00:07:42,021 --> 00:07:44,753
when he said my baby looked
like Winston Churchill.
182
00:07:45,303 --> 00:07:46,497
He loves Churchill.
183
00:07:46,584 --> 00:07:48,799
Your son should take that
as a compliment.
184
00:07:49,509 --> 00:07:51,549
He said it about my daughter.
185
00:07:52,912 --> 00:07:54,651
Well, this isn't about Sheldon.
186
00:07:54,738 --> 00:07:56,531
This is about Howard.
187
00:07:56,618 --> 00:07:58,408
I think it is
about Sheldon.
188
00:07:58,495 --> 00:08:01,433
How many times has he made fun
of Howard for being an engineer?
189
00:08:01,520 --> 00:08:03,706
Going to MIT?
His magic?
190
00:08:03,819 --> 00:08:05,683
Sheldon doesn't make fun
of his magic.
191
00:08:05,770 --> 00:08:07,838
Well, he should.
It's stupid.
192
00:08:09,603 --> 00:08:10,989
Anyway, the point is,
193
00:08:11,076 --> 00:08:13,295
Sheldon shouldn't dish it out
if he can't take it.
194
00:08:13,382 --> 00:08:16,404
I think the point is
that Howard owes him an apology.
195
00:08:16,491 --> 00:08:17,755
Yeah, well, I think the point is
196
00:08:17,842 --> 00:08:19,206
if Sheldon has a problem
with Howard,
197
00:08:19,293 --> 00:08:21,034
Sheldon should take it up
with him.
198
00:08:21,211 --> 00:08:22,872
Mama.
199
00:08:22,959 --> 00:08:24,315
Now, if you'll excuse me,
200
00:08:24,402 --> 00:08:27,581
the prime minister of England
needs her diaper changed.
201
00:08:31,202 --> 00:08:32,612
Hey.
202
00:08:33,537 --> 00:08:35,325
Oh, ho, hoh!
That's great.
203
00:08:35,412 --> 00:08:36,895
He's a Supreme Court justice,
204
00:08:36,982 --> 00:08:38,624
and you're the
U.S. Constitution.
205
00:08:38,711 --> 00:08:41,292
Yep. He interprets me.
206
00:08:42,116 --> 00:08:43,896
And guess what's
underneath this?
207
00:08:43,983 --> 00:08:45,635
The Bill of Tights.
208
00:08:47,013 --> 00:08:50,939
Smart, funny, gorgeous...
Are we a match or what?
209
00:08:51,941 --> 00:08:53,862
Hey, Bert,
what are you dressed as?
210
00:08:53,949 --> 00:08:55,333
I'll give you a hint.
211
00:08:55,420 --> 00:08:57,852
My work in seismic refraction
measurements and...
212
00:08:57,939 --> 00:09:00,042
Hey, Stuart,
what are you dressed as?
213
00:09:00,617 --> 00:09:02,083
I'm a butterfly.
214
00:09:02,170 --> 00:09:04,783
Did you steal those from
Halley's "let's pretend" box?
215
00:09:04,870 --> 00:09:06,432
I'm gonna put them back.
216
00:09:07,642 --> 00:09:09,372
All right, I'll tell you.
217
00:09:09,459 --> 00:09:11,060
I'm Maurice "Doc" Ewing,
218
00:09:11,147 --> 00:09:13,598
winner of
the 1960 Vetlesen Prize,
219
00:09:13,685 --> 00:09:16,596
generally regarded
as the Nobel Prize of geology.
220
00:09:16,683 --> 00:09:18,901
Oh, yeah. Now I see it.
221
00:09:19,380 --> 00:09:20,855
Ask me how I died.
222
00:09:20,942 --> 00:09:23,620
Spoiler alert: brain hemorrhage.
223
00:09:24,418 --> 00:09:26,151
Well, Gorblimey.
224
00:09:26,238 --> 00:09:28,308
You look
like a thousand tuppence.
225
00:09:28,395 --> 00:09:30,382
Don't he, Mary Poppins?
226
00:09:31,317 --> 00:09:33,191
Are you gonna talk
like that all night?
227
00:09:33,278 --> 00:09:35,276
Jiff willikers, I am.
228
00:09:36,161 --> 00:09:37,129
Isn't he cute?
229
00:09:37,216 --> 00:09:39,606
He's gonna get a
spoonful of sugar later.
230
00:09:39,693 --> 00:09:42,097
And I'm gonna sweep
Ms. Poppins' chimney.
231
00:09:44,788 --> 00:09:46,663
So, here we are.
232
00:09:46,766 --> 00:09:49,924
On Halloween.
On this couch.
233
00:09:50,166 --> 00:09:51,239
Does it ring any bells?
234
00:09:51,326 --> 00:09:52,683
Really? We're still doing this?
235
00:09:52,770 --> 00:09:55,542
I'm just surprised
you don't remember our first kiss.
236
00:09:55,964 --> 00:09:58,082
Fine.
It was on Halloween.
237
00:09:58,169 --> 00:09:59,722
Are you agreeing
just to shut me up?
238
00:09:59,809 --> 00:10:01,909
You got another way?
I'm all ears.
239
00:10:03,314 --> 00:10:05,869
- Really? An arranged marriage?
- Yeah.
240
00:10:05,956 --> 00:10:07,183
I know how it sounds.
241
00:10:07,270 --> 00:10:09,213
It sounds awesome.
242
00:10:10,254 --> 00:10:11,900
Is that just an Indian thing,
243
00:10:11,987 --> 00:10:13,940
or can I get a piece of that?
244
00:10:15,558 --> 00:10:18,237
You know the woman
has a choice, right?
245
00:10:18,324 --> 00:10:20,143
There's always a catch.
246
00:10:23,232 --> 00:10:25,344
Happy Halloween.
247
00:10:30,238 --> 00:10:32,050
Who wants to
see a magic trick?
248
00:10:32,137 --> 00:10:34,290
Oh, that's right.
No one.
249
00:10:37,290 --> 00:10:39,610
Ha! They're you.
250
00:10:45,488 --> 00:10:47,041
What do you think you're doing?
251
00:10:47,128 --> 00:10:48,280
I thought it was clear.
252
00:10:48,367 --> 00:10:51,782
I'm being unnecessarily hurtful
but with a sweet voice.
253
00:10:53,417 --> 00:10:54,985
And I don't understand
what's going on
254
00:10:55,072 --> 00:10:57,025
because I went to MIT.
255
00:10:58,611 --> 00:11:00,352
Okay, guys, I think
that's enough.
256
00:11:00,439 --> 00:11:02,695
Hold on. I'm
the judge here,
257
00:11:02,773 --> 00:11:04,782
and I'm going to allow it.
258
00:11:05,386 --> 00:11:06,609
Raj, take a break.
259
00:11:06,696 --> 00:11:07,743
Hey, free speech.
260
00:11:07,830 --> 00:11:09,602
Right back there
somewhere.
261
00:11:11,589 --> 00:11:12,776
You know what, guys?
262
00:11:12,863 --> 00:11:14,931
You got us. Congratulations.
Now why don't you go back
263
00:11:15,018 --> 00:11:16,876
to your apartment and
put on your other costumes.
264
00:11:16,963 --> 00:11:18,306
Oh, but it's so far away,
265
00:11:18,393 --> 00:11:20,688
and I have such
teeny, tiny legs.
266
00:11:21,433 --> 00:11:24,182
Really? Our bodies?
Is that where we're going, Amy?
267
00:11:24,269 --> 00:11:25,571
What's wrong with my body?
268
00:11:25,658 --> 00:11:28,899
Well, for starters,
you have a quarter in your nose.
269
00:11:33,660 --> 00:11:35,578
Not now, Sheldon.
270
00:11:35,746 --> 00:11:38,094
I don't get invited
to a lot of parties.
271
00:11:38,181 --> 00:11:39,648
Is this a good one?
272
00:11:39,910 --> 00:11:41,480
Oh, yeah.
273
00:11:50,408 --> 00:11:53,118
Did that guacamole
taste weird to you?
274
00:11:56,680 --> 00:11:58,586
Tasted weird to me.
275
00:12:00,480 --> 00:12:01,987
Can't believe Amy did that.
276
00:12:02,074 --> 00:12:03,774
Oh, come on.
You thought it was funny
277
00:12:03,861 --> 00:12:05,229
when I dressed up as Sheldon.
278
00:12:05,316 --> 00:12:06,591
That was totally different.
279
00:12:06,678 --> 00:12:09,250
- How?
- That didn't hurt my feelings.
280
00:12:10,418 --> 00:12:12,463
Well, for what it's worth,
281
00:12:12,550 --> 00:12:14,649
I didn't think it was
a very good impression of you.
282
00:12:14,736 --> 00:12:17,549
Really? You don't think I have
an annoying high-pitched voice?
283
00:12:17,636 --> 00:12:18,937
No, not at all.
284
00:12:19,024 --> 00:12:22,907
In fact, I find
your voice quite melodious.
285
00:12:23,503 --> 00:12:25,384
Mm-hmm.
And you don't think
286
00:12:25,471 --> 00:12:27,860
I'm unnecessarily hurtful?
287
00:12:28,949 --> 00:12:29,955
What? I'm sorry.
288
00:12:30,042 --> 00:12:33,086
I-I couldn't hear the question.
I just heard the music.
289
00:12:37,354 --> 00:12:39,936
Well, people came,
they ate, they vowed
290
00:12:40,023 --> 00:12:41,329
to never speak
to each other again.
291
00:12:41,416 --> 00:12:43,477
I think it was
a successful party.
292
00:12:44,207 --> 00:12:46,963
It was.
And I'm sorry about earlier.
293
00:12:47,050 --> 00:12:48,274
I know it doesn't matter.
294
00:12:48,589 --> 00:12:50,869
No, it does matter.
295
00:12:50,956 --> 00:12:52,464
Okay? You were right.
296
00:12:52,683 --> 00:12:53,910
It was Halloween.
297
00:12:54,238 --> 00:12:56,376
I was dressed as a cat,
you were a hobbit.
298
00:12:56,463 --> 00:12:59,024
It was right there
on that couch.
299
00:12:59,847 --> 00:13:01,547
Why didn't you just say that?
300
00:13:01,737 --> 00:13:04,135
Because I always hated
that was our first kiss.
301
00:13:04,222 --> 00:13:05,946
I was drunk,
and I was still with Kurt,
302
00:13:06,033 --> 00:13:07,565
and I was
using you to make
303
00:13:07,652 --> 00:13:08,579
myself feel better.
304
00:13:08,666 --> 00:13:11,370
I... just wanted our first
kiss to mean something.
305
00:13:11,457 --> 00:13:13,500
That's why I said it was
the one on your birthday.
306
00:13:14,785 --> 00:13:16,258
I like that.
307
00:13:17,613 --> 00:13:20,024
We'll make that
our official first kiss.
308
00:13:20,230 --> 00:13:23,144
Thank you. Aw.
309
00:13:24,214 --> 00:13:25,981
That was beautiful.
310
00:13:30,210 --> 00:13:32,317
- Mm.
- What are you still doing here?
311
00:13:32,484 --> 00:13:33,778
I was in the bathroom.
312
00:13:33,865 --> 00:13:35,785
Guacamole didn't agree
with me.
313
00:13:36,687 --> 00:13:38,731
Well, since you're here,
you can help us clean up.
314
00:13:38,818 --> 00:13:40,817
- Will you take this out, please?
- Sure.
315
00:13:40,904 --> 00:13:41,983
Thank you.
316
00:13:42,077 --> 00:13:43,218
It's late.
317
00:13:43,468 --> 00:13:45,612
Would you mind
if I crashed here tonight?
318
00:13:45,699 --> 00:13:46,997
You are always welcome here.
319
00:13:47,084 --> 00:13:48,847
- Thank you.
- Mm-hmm.
320
00:13:55,961 --> 00:13:57,246
Where were we?
321
00:13:59,929 --> 00:14:02,848
I think Howard hurting
my feelings has in some ways
322
00:14:02,935 --> 00:14:04,326
made me a better person.
323
00:14:04,413 --> 00:14:06,567
Hmm. Look at you,
improving on perfection.
324
00:14:06,654 --> 00:14:07,913
How so?
325
00:14:08,345 --> 00:14:09,959
As you were eating that Danish,
326
00:14:10,046 --> 00:14:11,887
I wanted to point out
that the Danish
327
00:14:11,974 --> 00:14:13,109
isn't Danish at all.
328
00:14:13,196 --> 00:14:15,051
It was imported
by Austrian bakers
329
00:14:15,138 --> 00:14:17,090
during a labor dispute
in the 1800s.
330
00:14:17,177 --> 00:14:18,568
But I chose not to,
331
00:14:18,655 --> 00:14:20,551
because I didn't want to be
the kind of fella
332
00:14:20,638 --> 00:14:23,395
who foists unwanted facts
about European pastries
333
00:14:23,482 --> 00:14:25,105
on the unwilling.
334
00:14:25,679 --> 00:14:27,622
Huh. That's actually
interesting.
335
00:14:27,709 --> 00:14:29,863
Sorry. Now you'll never know.
336
00:14:30,640 --> 00:14:32,258
Hey, guys, I need your help.
337
00:14:32,336 --> 00:14:34,379
Bernadette's still
pretty upset
338
00:14:34,466 --> 00:14:35,640
about your costumes.
339
00:14:35,727 --> 00:14:36,953
She's upset?
340
00:14:37,040 --> 00:14:39,481
Those pants I wore to make fun
of you were so tight,
341
00:14:39,568 --> 00:14:41,496
I risked a testicular hernia.
342
00:14:42,944 --> 00:14:44,007
Anyway,
343
00:14:44,124 --> 00:14:47,115
if you guys could apologize,
it'd be a big help.
344
00:14:47,202 --> 00:14:49,193
Oh, we'd be happy
to apologize to her
345
00:14:49,280 --> 00:14:50,873
as soon as she apologizes to me
346
00:14:50,960 --> 00:14:52,809
for not making you apologize
to Sheldon.
347
00:14:52,896 --> 00:14:53,926
I didn't follow that,
348
00:14:54,013 --> 00:14:55,840
but, then, between my wife
and that guacamole,
349
00:14:55,927 --> 00:14:57,793
I didn't get a lot
of sleep last night.
350
00:14:58,390 --> 00:15:00,068
Don't you think
it's unreasonable
351
00:15:00,155 --> 00:15:02,809
for her to ask us to do
something she refused to do?
352
00:15:02,896 --> 00:15:04,825
Yes. So when can you
stop by?
353
00:15:05,744 --> 00:15:07,372
I don't understand.
If it's unreasonable,
354
00:15:07,459 --> 00:15:08,521
why should we do it?
355
00:15:08,608 --> 00:15:10,254
Okay, how about this?
You know in Star Wars
356
00:15:10,341 --> 00:15:12,777
when R2 and Chewbacca
were playing holochess?
357
00:15:12,864 --> 00:15:14,153
Really? Star Wars?
358
00:15:14,240 --> 00:15:16,504
Amy, let the man speak.
359
00:15:17,684 --> 00:15:18,683
Well, Chewbacca
360
00:15:18,770 --> 00:15:21,043
was losing
and getting angry and...
361
00:15:21,130 --> 00:15:22,381
Wa-Wa-Wait.
362
00:15:22,468 --> 00:15:25,552
Are you saying
we should let the Wookiee win?
363
00:15:25,701 --> 00:15:26,785
Hey.
364
00:15:26,890 --> 00:15:29,644
Hey, that's my wife
you're talking about.
365
00:15:31,116 --> 00:15:33,738
But yes, let the Wookiee win.
366
00:15:39,726 --> 00:15:41,285
Hello, Bernadette.
367
00:15:41,771 --> 00:15:44,207
Wait, did you just walk
into my house?
368
00:15:44,718 --> 00:15:46,699
No, Howard let me in.
369
00:15:46,786 --> 00:15:47,810
Where is he?
370
00:15:47,897 --> 00:15:50,144
Oh, he got in his car
and drove away.
371
00:15:52,280 --> 00:15:53,310
Oh.
372
00:15:53,397 --> 00:15:54,886
Is that watermelon
for anybody?
373
00:15:54,973 --> 00:15:57,715
- It's for Halley.
- Is she gonna eat all of it?
374
00:15:57,802 --> 00:15:59,863
God, no wonder
she looks like Churchill.
375
00:16:02,476 --> 00:16:03,840
What do you want, Sheldon?
376
00:16:03,927 --> 00:16:05,990
Howard said
your feelings were hurt.
377
00:16:06,077 --> 00:16:07,457
Well, Howard's wrong.
I don't care
378
00:16:07,544 --> 00:16:08,965
if someone makes fun of me.
379
00:16:09,687 --> 00:16:10,998
All right.
380
00:16:11,210 --> 00:16:13,558
Apparently I came
all this way for nothing.
381
00:16:13,803 --> 00:16:16,715
Unless Halley wants to share
that watermelon?
382
00:16:16,951 --> 00:16:19,106
You think Amy's the first person
to make fun of me
383
00:16:19,193 --> 00:16:20,949
for having a squeaky voice?
384
00:16:21,858 --> 00:16:22,952
Do you?
385
00:16:23,062 --> 00:16:24,762
I feel like my chance
at watermelon
386
00:16:24,849 --> 00:16:26,504
is dangling by a thread.
387
00:16:26,591 --> 00:16:27,654
She's not.
388
00:16:27,741 --> 00:16:29,293
It's been happening
my whole life.
389
00:16:29,380 --> 00:16:31,520
And-and she called me out
for being mean?
390
00:16:31,607 --> 00:16:33,910
Well, I've had to be mean.
391
00:16:36,224 --> 00:16:37,740
It's hard to be taken
seriously
392
00:16:37,827 --> 00:16:39,809
when you're always
the smallest person in the room.
393
00:16:39,896 --> 00:16:40,977
I know that.
394
00:16:41,064 --> 00:16:43,488
I was in high school
when I was nine years old.
395
00:16:43,585 --> 00:16:44,936
I tried to tell
the other kids
396
00:16:45,023 --> 00:16:47,114
that although
my physical stature was small,
397
00:16:47,201 --> 00:16:49,676
my intellectual stature
towered over them.
398
00:16:49,983 --> 00:16:52,285
That only seemed
to make things worse.
399
00:16:53,864 --> 00:16:56,816
The kids called me
Bernadette the marionette.
400
00:16:57,623 --> 00:16:59,948
Because you're small.
That's funny.
401
00:17:01,132 --> 00:17:02,558
No, it's not.
402
00:17:03,015 --> 00:17:05,294
Well, people used
to call me egghead
403
00:17:05,413 --> 00:17:07,263
'cause there were eggs
on my head.
404
00:17:07,483 --> 00:17:09,113
'Cause they threw them at me.
405
00:17:09,784 --> 00:17:11,465
That's terrible.
406
00:17:11,646 --> 00:17:14,154
One time my brothers
made me breathe helium.
407
00:17:14,241 --> 00:17:15,576
I tried to call for help,
408
00:17:15,663 --> 00:17:18,004
but the only one
who could hear me was the dog.
409
00:17:20,477 --> 00:17:22,448
That's also terrible.
410
00:17:23,366 --> 00:17:25,957
My goodness, you had to live
in a house with a dog.
411
00:17:27,561 --> 00:17:30,626
I guess we both had to put up
with a lot of crap from people.
412
00:17:31,226 --> 00:17:33,754
I suppose we have. Huh.
413
00:17:34,015 --> 00:17:36,629
Maybe you and I are more
alike than we thought.
414
00:17:36,967 --> 00:17:38,373
Maybe we are.
415
00:17:38,460 --> 00:17:40,895
Although I'm exceptionally tall,
and you're exceptionally...
416
00:17:40,982 --> 00:17:43,113
- Sheldon.
- You didn't even let me finish.
417
00:17:43,216 --> 00:17:45,699
- Fine. Sorry.
- Short.
418
00:17:51,412 --> 00:17:53,012
Sheldon, you sure
you're ready for this?
419
00:17:53,099 --> 00:17:55,224
- This movie's pretty scary.
- Please.
420
00:17:55,311 --> 00:17:57,372
I'm an adult.
I think I can handle it.
421
00:17:57,459 --> 00:18:00,582
That's what you said about the
butterfly pavilion at the zoo.
422
00:18:00,989 --> 00:18:03,355
That was my fault.
After I pet that goat,
423
00:18:03,442 --> 00:18:05,043
I felt like a gladiator.
424
00:18:05,695 --> 00:18:06,996
Okay, lights on, or lights off?
425
00:18:07,083 --> 00:18:09,840
Lights off. If I'm gonna do this,
I want to do it right.
426
00:18:16,515 --> 00:18:18,334
What do you guys think
you're doing?
427
00:18:18,421 --> 00:18:19,887
We're showing
Sheldon Halloween.
428
00:18:19,974 --> 00:18:22,031
Absolutely not.
Sheldon, come home.
429
00:18:24,133 --> 00:18:25,800
But I really want
to watch it.
430
00:18:25,887 --> 00:18:28,199
I know you do,
but I am forbidding it.
431
00:18:28,286 --> 00:18:30,824
Oh, man. Sorry, guys.
432
00:18:34,982 --> 00:18:36,442
- What took you so long?
- I'm sorry.
433
00:18:36,529 --> 00:18:38,043
I just got your text!
31374
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