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♪ It seems today that all you see ♪
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00:00:04,897 --> 00:00:07,822
♪ Is violence in movies and sex on TV ♪
3
00:00:07,991 --> 00:00:11,677
♪ But where are those good old-fashioned values ♪
4
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♪ On which we used to rely? ♪
5
00:00:14,831 --> 00:00:18,166
♪ Lucky there's a family guy ♪
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00:00:18,185 --> 00:00:21,336
♪ Lucky there's a man who positively can do ♪
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♪ All the things that make us ♪
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♪ Laugh and cry ♪
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♪ He's... a... Fam... ily... Guy! ♪
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Dinnertime, everyone.
11
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You know what I'm craving?
Lobster.
12
00:00:38,597 --> 00:00:41,265
Your lobster today
is Dinty Moore stew
13
00:00:41,433 --> 00:00:43,691
from a can too dented
to risk on people.
14
00:00:43,786 --> 00:00:47,028
What does "Dinty" even mean?
Is it an adjective or a guy?
15
00:00:47,197 --> 00:00:48,622
Or a contraction, like,
16
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"Boy, he really screwed up
that meal, din't he?"
17
00:00:51,218 --> 00:00:55,036
I mean, Dinty Moore?
How about Dinty Less, right?
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00:00:55,130 --> 00:00:57,598
Gold. All of this.
19
00:00:59,468 --> 00:01:01,042
I'll get it.
It might be Jabberjaw.
20
00:01:01,136 --> 00:01:02,969
Uh, you kids don't
remember Jabberjaw,
21
00:01:03,122 --> 00:01:06,231
but your father very badly
wants to meet Jabberjaw.
22
00:01:06,458 --> 00:01:08,308
It came! My hammock came!
23
00:01:08,460 --> 00:01:11,962
Yay, you brought loud energy
into the dining room!
24
00:01:11,980 --> 00:01:13,630
Why did you get
a hammock, Peter?
25
00:01:13,649 --> 00:01:15,632
Well, the year 2020
was a terrible year
26
00:01:15,651 --> 00:01:17,725
for the Corona beer company,
so they had to sell off
27
00:01:17,745 --> 00:01:19,469
all their TV commercial
hammocks.
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And owning a hammock from TV
has always been
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my third-biggest dream.
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00:01:23,325 --> 00:01:25,158
- My first big...
- Meet Jabberjaw.
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Okay, you know about Jabberjaw.
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And then my other dream
is to be an NFL referee.
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00:01:34,153 --> 00:01:37,012
It's good, it's good.
The-the-the kick was good.
34
00:01:41,994 --> 00:01:44,103
Hammock life is the best life,
Chris.
35
00:01:44,254 --> 00:01:46,847
Yeah, you clearly wanted
to be seen lying in a hammock,
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00:01:46,941 --> 00:01:49,333
so I'm glad
I could do that for you.
37
00:01:49,426 --> 00:01:52,018
Now, to drink lemonade
with a southern drawl.
38
00:01:52,113 --> 00:01:55,005
Chip, chip,
guv'nor. Shrimp on the barbie.
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00:01:55,023 --> 00:01:58,675
You sound like Colonel Sanders.
40
00:02:00,846 --> 00:02:02,437
- Damn it.
- Oh, no.
41
00:02:02,531 --> 00:02:05,349
The neighbor's sprinkler
ruined whatever this is.
42
00:02:05,442 --> 00:02:07,851
Not so fast, Chris.
I don't give up that easy.
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00:02:07,870 --> 00:02:09,019
Good for you, Dad.
44
00:02:09,112 --> 00:02:10,354
Go knock on the neighbor's door
45
00:02:10,447 --> 00:02:12,706
and have a mildly
uncomfortable conversation.
46
00:02:12,800 --> 00:02:14,258
I give up.
47
00:02:23,051 --> 00:02:25,627
Peter, uh, we can't start
until you start.
48
00:02:25,721 --> 00:02:28,889
I'm sorry, gang, I'm just so mad
at my backyard neighbor.
49
00:02:29,041 --> 00:02:30,315
- What's the problem?
- He's got a sprinkler
50
00:02:30,542 --> 00:02:32,709
going nuts and spraying
on my property.
51
00:02:32,802 --> 00:02:35,212
- I just don't know what to do.
52
00:02:35,230 --> 00:02:37,230
Hang on while I close this law book
53
00:02:37,324 --> 00:02:39,641
and return it to a shelf of law books.
54
00:02:39,660 --> 00:02:41,142
Have you been injured in an accident?
55
00:02:41,311 --> 00:02:43,737
Man, I hope so. I'm Brick Baker.
56
00:02:43,813 --> 00:02:45,647
My mama didn't raise no dummy.
57
00:02:45,666 --> 00:02:47,724
And I'm here to get you money.
58
00:02:47,743 --> 00:02:49,226
That almost rhymes.
59
00:02:49,244 --> 00:02:51,003
My specialities arecontract law
60
00:02:51,154 --> 00:02:52,838
and kicking bitch ass for you.
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00:02:53,007 --> 00:02:54,155
Also probate.
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00:02:54,175 --> 00:02:56,233
You trip and fall?Got a dog bite?
63
00:02:56,251 --> 00:02:58,752
You used baby powder onyour vagina, you crazy person?
64
00:02:58,921 --> 00:03:00,846
Well, if you haven't,start doing it.
65
00:03:01,073 --> 00:03:03,331
Brick Baker's getting you paid.
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00:03:03,425 --> 00:03:08,078
Ha! You need hot, fresh justice,so call da Baker.
67
00:03:08,096 --> 00:03:10,171
I said I wasn't wearing that!
68
00:03:10,265 --> 00:03:11,581
Maybe you should
hire that lawyer
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00:03:11,600 --> 00:03:13,675
to sue the problem neighbor
you got.
70
00:03:13,694 --> 00:03:16,770
Hey, great idea, Cleveland.
I loved his little judge hammer.
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00:03:16,922 --> 00:03:18,438
Gavel, it's called.
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00:03:18,532 --> 00:03:20,532
N-N-N-N-N-Now, because thisis a regional commercial,
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00:03:20,609 --> 00:03:22,776
it's gonna endjust a half a second too early.
74
00:03:22,928 --> 00:03:24,778
But remember, call 22...
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00:03:31,027 --> 00:03:33,194
Mr. Griffin,
I've reviewed your complaint,
76
00:03:33,214 --> 00:03:35,029
and I think you have
an excellent case.
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00:03:35,049 --> 00:03:38,475
- That's great.
- N-N-N-N-N-Now, can I tell you
something off the record?
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00:03:38,477 --> 00:03:40,702
"Live At Birdland,
Art Blakey Quartet,
79
00:03:40,721 --> 00:03:42,629
Blue Note Records, 1957."
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00:03:42,781 --> 00:03:45,057
Okay, I can see that I came
to the right lawyer.
81
00:03:45,133 --> 00:03:48,060
N-N-N-Now, I just need
to file a brief.
82
00:03:50,731 --> 00:03:53,047
Yeah, this-this is gonna
work out. I want to hire you.
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00:03:53,141 --> 00:03:55,567
Excellent. Let me just
type up your filing.
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00:03:55,719 --> 00:03:57,143
Name: Peter Griffin.
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00:03:57,312 --> 00:03:59,738
Favorite WNBA Team--
that's a weird second question.
86
00:03:59,889 --> 00:04:01,073
I'll put "Dallas Wings."
87
00:04:01,224 --> 00:04:02,632
Home address...
88
00:04:02,726 --> 00:04:04,892
Wait, you live
at 31 Spooner Street?
89
00:04:04,912 --> 00:04:06,894
Yeah, cross street: Forker Lane.
90
00:04:06,914 --> 00:04:09,639
Out in Cutlery Estates.
Is that a problem?
91
00:04:09,658 --> 00:04:12,142
Um, nope. No problem.
92
00:04:12,160 --> 00:04:14,068
I got you, Peter Griffin.
93
00:04:14,162 --> 00:04:16,255
When we goes to court,
I will be right there with you.
94
00:04:16,331 --> 00:04:18,315
Just like I say
on my local cable commercial,
95
00:04:18,333 --> 00:04:20,575
"With Brick by your side,
you can't..."
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00:04:27,659 --> 00:04:30,010
Thanks for helping me find
a lobster roll truck
97
00:04:30,104 --> 00:04:31,270
on Instagram, Stewie.
98
00:04:31,421 --> 00:04:32,829
Eh, I just wish
we didn't have to go
99
00:04:32,922 --> 00:04:35,181
to this stupid,
gentrified waterfront.
100
00:04:35,334 --> 00:04:36,775
This place was so much better
101
00:04:36,926 --> 00:04:38,777
when it sucked
and we never came here.
102
00:04:38,928 --> 00:04:40,837
Well, here's our
lobster roll truck.
103
00:04:40,839 --> 00:04:43,448
Uh, hey, guys?
104
00:04:43,600 --> 00:04:45,008
You're cutting in line.
105
00:04:45,027 --> 00:04:49,270
It starts back there.
106
00:04:49,290 --> 00:04:50,438
What? No.
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00:04:50,532 --> 00:04:52,624
All I wanted was just
some decent lobster.
108
00:04:52,776 --> 00:04:55,201
You know, Bri, they're right
out there, up for grabs.
109
00:04:55,354 --> 00:04:57,129
We should just go
straight to the source.
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00:04:57,356 --> 00:04:59,113
What are you even suggesting,
Stewie?
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00:04:59,207 --> 00:05:02,426
That we, what, we get a lobster
boat and be lobstermen?
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00:05:04,530 --> 00:05:06,054
Yeah.
113
00:05:11,628 --> 00:05:14,721
Hey, Peter, where's the
defendant? And where's Brick?
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00:05:14,798 --> 00:05:17,131
Sorry I'm late. I had to make
these small desserts
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00:05:17,151 --> 00:05:18,650
change their ways.
116
00:05:18,802 --> 00:05:20,301
Ha. Tort reform.
117
00:05:20,321 --> 00:05:22,821
Anyway, let's get this started.
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00:05:23,048 --> 00:05:24,656
Wha-- Why are you
standing there?
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00:05:24,808 --> 00:05:26,825
You're supposed to be over here,
suing my neighbor.
120
00:05:26,976 --> 00:05:30,144
Uh, Peter, I am your neighbor.
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00:05:30,164 --> 00:05:32,238
You're my neighbor?
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00:05:32,391 --> 00:05:33,406
You're the defendant?
123
00:05:33,500 --> 00:05:36,168
And I'm the courtroom
sketch artist?
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00:05:38,246 --> 00:05:39,671
I drew a Far Side.
125
00:05:46,905 --> 00:05:48,405
I hire you to sue my neighbor,
126
00:05:48,498 --> 00:05:50,164
and you don't tell me
you're my neighbor?
127
00:05:50,184 --> 00:05:51,850
- That's so unethical.
- Whoa.
128
00:05:52,001 --> 00:05:53,593
I may not have gone
to Harvard Law School,
129
00:05:53,687 --> 00:05:55,002
and I don't even know
if you keep track
130
00:05:55,022 --> 00:05:56,429
of who went to Harvard
Law School...
131
00:05:56,523 --> 00:05:58,523
- I don't.
- ...but I did not go
to Harvard Law School
132
00:05:58,675 --> 00:06:01,008
just to have my integrity
questioned.
133
00:06:01,028 --> 00:06:02,694
But you said you'd be my lawyer.
134
00:06:02,771 --> 00:06:04,270
Did I, Peter? Think back.
135
00:06:04,423 --> 00:06:06,239
I really want you to think back
really quickly.
136
00:06:07,368 --> 00:06:11,111
Peter, we could've had fun,
but I died.
137
00:06:11,263 --> 00:06:14,039
Yeesh. I-I don't want
to think anymore for a while.
138
00:06:14,266 --> 00:06:16,357
Gentlemen, the jury's waiting.
139
00:06:16,377 --> 00:06:17,934
Your Honor,
you got to understand,
140
00:06:17,953 --> 00:06:19,452
I thought I had a lawyer,
but now...
141
00:06:19,605 --> 00:06:21,713
Very well.
I'll grant a continuance
142
00:06:21,865 --> 00:06:25,759
and just enter into the court
record that you're a chicken.
143
00:06:26,795 --> 00:06:28,111
Wait, what?
144
00:06:28,130 --> 00:06:29,721
It's perfectly routine.
145
00:06:29,948 --> 00:06:31,615
I just note that Peter Griffin
146
00:06:31,708 --> 00:06:35,118
has to run and hide
behind his lawyer daddy.
147
00:06:35,137 --> 00:06:37,062
What-- n-no.
I don't need a lawyer.
148
00:06:37,289 --> 00:06:39,398
I'm gonna beat Brick Baker
all on my own.
149
00:06:39,549 --> 00:06:41,124
But I don't got
an opening statement.
150
00:06:41,143 --> 00:06:45,112
Ooh. I move
for a five-minute recess.
151
00:06:49,468 --> 00:06:51,559
- I'm worried for Peter.
- I'll say.
152
00:06:51,578 --> 00:06:52,969
Brick Baker's gonna win, easy.
153
00:06:53,062 --> 00:06:55,155
Look, he's leaned back
with his feet up,
154
00:06:55,307 --> 00:06:57,565
confidently whistling.
155
00:06:59,661 --> 00:07:01,811
He's, uh, he's not very good
at whistling,
156
00:07:01,905 --> 00:07:04,047
but he's doing the other stuff.
157
00:07:08,503 --> 00:07:10,411
I can't believe
we're doing this.
158
00:07:10,431 --> 00:07:12,413
We're actually going
lobster fishing.
159
00:07:12,507 --> 00:07:14,824
Our way of life
is disappearing, Bri.
160
00:07:14,843 --> 00:07:17,418
Stewie, we got the boat
20 minutes ago. Settle down.
161
00:07:17,438 --> 00:07:18,920
How'd we get the boat, anyway?
162
00:07:18,939 --> 00:07:21,998
Traded it for opioids from
a working-class New Englander
163
00:07:22,017 --> 00:07:24,091
- hooked on opioids.
- Huh.
164
00:07:24,186 --> 00:07:26,260
All right, well, I got
lobster pots, trammel nets,
165
00:07:26,280 --> 00:07:29,764
buoys, chum, rope,
flotation gear and a radio.
166
00:07:29,858 --> 00:07:31,357
- What do you got?
- Opioids.
167
00:07:31,510 --> 00:07:33,601
Stewie, stop screwing around
and give me those opioids
168
00:07:33,695 --> 00:07:34,844
and go get me some more opioids.
169
00:07:34,938 --> 00:07:36,362
Uh, let me check
on Rupert first.
170
00:07:36,515 --> 00:07:38,957
Rupert, how you doing
with that double sheet bend?
171
00:07:40,352 --> 00:07:42,794
Okay, apparently I said
"half hitch" or whatever.
172
00:07:42,946 --> 00:07:45,205
- I don't even know
why you brought him.
- Let's not talk about it.
173
00:07:45,299 --> 00:07:47,299
He gets so jealous
when you and I hang out.
174
00:07:47,450 --> 00:07:49,375
Well, tell him he doesn't
have anything to worry about.
175
00:07:49,528 --> 00:07:51,261
He doesn't?
176
00:07:54,199 --> 00:07:57,367
Mr. Griffin, this has been
a huge waste of time.
177
00:07:57,460 --> 00:08:00,220
I hereby find for the defendant,
effective as of the moment
178
00:08:00,314 --> 00:08:02,296
I slam down
my gavel uninterrup...
179
00:08:02,390 --> 00:08:05,967
Wait! Your Honor, we have
evidence relevant to this case.
180
00:08:05,986 --> 00:08:08,394
Who are you?
And what kind of evidence?
181
00:08:08,547 --> 00:08:11,047
I'm an HOA dick,
and I found bylaws proving
182
00:08:11,140 --> 00:08:14,141
that Brick used his sprinklers
on incorrect Tuesdays.
183
00:08:14,161 --> 00:08:16,569
I'm a cop, and I'm gonna
suspiciously turn off
184
00:08:16,663 --> 00:08:20,056
my body cam, in case
something sketchy goes down.
185
00:08:20,075 --> 00:08:22,334
And I found Quahog's original
survey maps,
186
00:08:22,485 --> 00:08:26,171
proving that Brick's sprinklers
aren't even on his own property.
187
00:08:26,322 --> 00:08:28,173
What?
188
00:08:29,417 --> 00:08:32,010
The town surveyor
was being pestered by a bee,
189
00:08:32,161 --> 00:08:34,921
so the property lines
were all twisty-turny.
190
00:08:35,073 --> 00:08:37,641
Oh, that's why
his statue's like that.
191
00:08:41,263 --> 00:08:44,597
Well, this is more than enough
evidence for cartoon court.
192
00:08:44,750 --> 00:08:46,933
I find for the plaintiff.
193
00:08:47,085 --> 00:08:48,175
- Yeah!
- We did it!
194
00:08:48,195 --> 00:08:50,654
Talk about "all rise." Giggity!
195
00:08:52,015 --> 00:08:53,865
G-G-I-T-Y.
196
00:08:54,034 --> 00:08:56,350
Yeah, there's-there's no Ds
in "giggity."
197
00:09:03,101 --> 00:09:05,359
Three hours of lobster fishing
and nothing.
198
00:09:05,528 --> 00:09:07,604
You shouldn't have dumped
all my Percocets in the water.
199
00:09:07,622 --> 00:09:09,363
Now the lobsters are just down
there hanging out
200
00:09:09,532 --> 00:09:12,275
and defrauding the government
for disability checks.
201
00:09:12,294 --> 00:09:13,777
Should we drop our traps
somewhere else?
202
00:09:13,795 --> 00:09:16,370
- Like where?
- I don't know,
maybe we try David Harbour.
203
00:09:16,390 --> 00:09:19,057
It's that harbor nobody even
heard of until three years ago,
204
00:09:19,208 --> 00:09:20,374
and now all of a sudden
it's huge.
205
00:09:20,394 --> 00:09:21,968
Eh, we could try Michael Bay.
206
00:09:22,120 --> 00:09:24,396
Although I hear that bay
was mean to Megan Fox.
207
00:09:24,547 --> 00:09:25,713
Maybe Roger Waters?
208
00:09:25,732 --> 00:09:27,140
- George Strait?
- Billy Ocean?
209
00:09:27,234 --> 00:09:28,474
- Ricki Lake?
- River Phoenix?
210
00:09:28,569 --> 00:09:31,461
How are those celebrity
water puns working out?
211
00:09:31,479 --> 00:09:34,239
- Welp, this has been a bust.
- Sea Thomas Howell?
212
00:09:34,390 --> 00:09:36,316
Anyway,
your guys' were good, too.
213
00:09:36,468 --> 00:09:39,393
Uhp, we're due
for an eight-second squall.
214
00:09:39,487 --> 00:09:40,987
I got to go have
an overacting scene
215
00:09:41,081 --> 00:09:44,474
where I curse God
in a boat storm.
216
00:09:44,492 --> 00:09:47,327
♪ ♪
217
00:09:47,421 --> 00:09:49,312
Strike me down, you coward.
218
00:09:49,405 --> 00:09:52,148
I have big feelings
about weather.
219
00:09:52,167 --> 00:09:55,093
The storm symbolizes my madness.
220
00:09:55,278 --> 00:09:58,013
This is worth it for fish.
221
00:10:01,268 --> 00:10:04,102
Well, Rupert, clear one
BAFTA's-worth of space
222
00:10:04,253 --> 00:10:05,437
on the trophy shelf.
223
00:10:05,664 --> 00:10:07,188
Rupert?
224
00:10:10,444 --> 00:10:12,426
Rupert.
225
00:10:12,446 --> 00:10:14,003
No!
226
00:10:14,022 --> 00:10:15,338
How did he sink so fast?
227
00:10:15,340 --> 00:10:19,192
He might h-have
a string of metal balls
228
00:10:19,344 --> 00:10:21,361
- uh, hidden within?
- What?
229
00:10:21,455 --> 00:10:23,179
We've been together
a long time, Brian.
230
00:10:23,181 --> 00:10:25,498
We have to do things
to keep it fresh.
231
00:10:29,463 --> 00:10:31,129
Hey there, company.
232
00:10:31,280 --> 00:10:33,114
Hey, brother. Wakanda forever.
233
00:10:33,133 --> 00:10:35,875
- Oh, I don't know.
- What do you want, Brick?
234
00:10:35,952 --> 00:10:37,284
Just came to congratulate you.
235
00:10:37,379 --> 00:10:38,803
Thought I'd be the bigger man.
236
00:10:39,030 --> 00:10:41,288
Bigger man?
You been talking to Lois?
237
00:10:41,308 --> 00:10:43,141
She doesn't measure
from the right spot.
238
00:10:43,368 --> 00:10:44,868
So, no hard feelings?
239
00:10:44,886 --> 00:10:46,478
You have been talking to Lois.
240
00:10:46,629 --> 00:10:48,295
Listen, the moral
of the story is this:
241
00:10:48,357 --> 00:10:50,982
watching you all in the court
today, I realized something.
242
00:10:51,209 --> 00:10:53,209
I may have a fancy law degree
and a phone number
243
00:10:53,302 --> 00:10:54,319
with all twos in it...
244
00:10:54,470 --> 00:10:56,529
...but, Peter, you have friends.
245
00:10:56,657 --> 00:10:59,974
And no one can ever take them
away from you.
246
00:10:59,993 --> 00:11:01,976
He said that weird.
247
00:11:01,995 --> 00:11:03,144
And I bought you a gift:
248
00:11:03,238 --> 00:11:04,904
four tickets
to today's matinee performance
249
00:11:04,998 --> 00:11:07,481
of Surfin' Bird:An American Musical.
250
00:11:09,318 --> 00:11:10,727
- Awesome!
- Live theater!
251
00:11:10,820 --> 00:11:15,006
We'll get to see
Law & Order extras onstage!
252
00:11:21,907 --> 00:11:23,998
Live stage plays are so great.
253
00:11:24,092 --> 00:11:26,167
I hope there's a gentle jibe
about Republicans
254
00:11:26,186 --> 00:11:28,353
so we can have a smug laugh.
255
00:11:30,098 --> 00:11:31,839
You gentlemen
are in the front row.
256
00:11:32,008 --> 00:11:34,175
- Aw, sweet.
- Oh, but not you, sir.
257
00:11:34,194 --> 00:11:36,528
You're all the way back
in the very top.
258
00:11:39,700 --> 00:11:43,593
- What?
- Yeah, just keep going up until
you see three corpses in parkas.
259
00:11:43,686 --> 00:11:46,204
♪ Bird, bird, well, the bird is the word ♪
260
00:11:46,431 --> 00:11:47,706
♪ A-well, a bird, bird, bird, b-bird's the word... ♪
261
00:11:47,933 --> 00:11:49,265
Man, this sucks.
262
00:11:49,284 --> 00:11:50,875
The stage is so way down there,
263
00:11:51,027 --> 00:11:52,526
the sound doesn't even travel
this far.
264
00:11:52,546 --> 00:11:55,714
The whole show's just being
relayed by some New York mook.
265
00:11:55,941 --> 00:11:59,959
Uh, they're saying everybody's
heard about the bird.
266
00:12:00,053 --> 00:12:03,112
And it goes on, and so forth.
267
00:12:03,131 --> 00:12:06,616
Okay, now they're saying
what the word is.
268
00:12:06,709 --> 00:12:08,709
Bird. It's bird.
269
00:12:08,803 --> 00:12:10,270
Well, may as well
take a terrible,
270
00:12:10,379 --> 00:12:13,380
faraway stage picture
that I'll never look at again.
271
00:12:13,475 --> 00:12:15,549
♪ Bird, bird, bird, b-bird's the word ♪
272
00:12:15,718 --> 00:12:17,143
♪ A-well, a bird, bird, bird... ♪
273
00:12:17,295 --> 00:12:20,739
Aw, Cleveland, Joe and Quagmire
are having such a good time.
274
00:12:20,890 --> 00:12:23,800
♪ A-well, a bird, bird, b-bird's the word... ♪
275
00:12:23,893 --> 00:12:25,818
With Brick?
276
00:12:25,971 --> 00:12:27,394
♪ Bird, bird, bird... ♪
277
00:12:27,414 --> 00:12:28,654
Crap, now they're getting
pulled up
278
00:12:28,807 --> 00:12:30,156
onstage to sing together.
279
00:12:30,308 --> 00:12:32,658
Surely they won't be given
inflatable electric guitars.
280
00:12:32,811 --> 00:12:35,903
Oh! They're being given
inflatable electric guitars.
281
00:12:37,257 --> 00:12:39,649
Oh, man, and now the early
reviews are coming in.
282
00:12:39,742 --> 00:12:40,817
♪ A-well, a bird ♪
283
00:12:40,835 --> 00:12:43,094
♪ Surfin' bird... ♪
284
00:12:43,321 --> 00:12:47,265
It's, it's like Brick Baker has
taken my friends away from me.
285
00:12:47,492 --> 00:12:48,825
- Now what's this?
286
00:12:48,994 --> 00:12:52,937
An unsolicited email from
a local mom I have a crush on?
287
00:12:53,089 --> 00:12:55,589
"Hi, Peter, it's Judy,
just thinking of you.
288
00:12:55,609 --> 00:12:58,259
"I've joined the team
at North Star Realty,
289
00:12:58,278 --> 00:13:00,169
and if you're ever thinking
of selling your home..."
290
00:13:00,188 --> 00:13:01,529
Well, that's disappointing.
291
00:13:14,294 --> 00:13:16,586
Jabberjaw?
292
00:13:20,708 --> 00:13:24,193
Brick, get in the photo,you old so-and-so.
293
00:13:24,287 --> 00:13:26,638
"Old so-and-so" is my nickname.
294
00:13:26,789 --> 00:13:27,972
Hey, Peter.
295
00:13:28,141 --> 00:13:29,866
Look who decided to drop by.
296
00:13:29,884 --> 00:13:31,643
Hey, why so glum,
you old so-and-so?
297
00:13:31,812 --> 00:13:33,036
All right, that's it.
298
00:13:33,054 --> 00:13:34,312
You like hanging out
with Brick? Fine.
299
00:13:34,463 --> 00:13:35,721
I don't need you guys.
300
00:13:35,874 --> 00:13:39,375
You people are backstabbers.
Like Stabby McBackerson.
301
00:13:39,394 --> 00:13:43,046
Honey? Lee Harvey?
Dinner's on the table.
302
00:13:44,566 --> 00:13:47,325
Well, when can you take a break?
303
00:13:47,552 --> 00:13:50,144
Okay, that's a mix-up.
That was, uh,
304
00:13:50,163 --> 00:13:53,206
that was Lee Harvey Oswald
working from home.
305
00:13:55,560 --> 00:13:57,743
We have to save Rupert.
We have to.
306
00:13:57,896 --> 00:13:59,245
I know, Stewie, but look.
307
00:13:59,397 --> 00:14:01,247
Our only chance is if
he's up here
308
00:14:01,399 --> 00:14:02,656
on the Phoebe Waller-Ridge.
309
00:14:02,750 --> 00:14:04,584
We'll never reach him
if he's fallen down into
310
00:14:04,678 --> 00:14:06,678
the Lin-Manuel Mariana Trench.
311
00:14:06,829 --> 00:14:08,713
Also, Harrison Fjord.
312
00:14:08,940 --> 00:14:10,907
Or-or yours.
Y-Yours are good, too.
313
00:14:10,925 --> 00:14:12,433
♪ ♪
314
00:14:24,606 --> 00:14:27,156
♪ ♪
315
00:15:19,402 --> 00:15:22,587
And just like that,
Rupert sank forever
316
00:15:22,738 --> 00:15:24,981
into the inky deep.
317
00:15:24,999 --> 00:15:27,425
Also, did you know
that the ocean is
318
00:15:27,652 --> 00:15:29,335
40% fish whiz?
319
00:15:29,487 --> 00:15:33,056
All this and more
on West's Wonders.
320
00:15:39,773 --> 00:15:42,999
Okay, top five racks
in '90s movies. Go.
321
00:15:43,017 --> 00:15:45,276
I'll bite. Maggie Smith,
Death on the Nile.
322
00:15:45,428 --> 00:15:47,278
Right rack, wrong decade.
Who's next?
323
00:15:47,505 --> 00:15:49,096
What the hell is he doing?
324
00:15:49,115 --> 00:15:51,265
His friends ditched him
for Brick Baker,
325
00:15:51,284 --> 00:15:54,101
so he's trying to recreate
the friend experience with us.
326
00:15:54,195 --> 00:15:57,013
- What? No.
- Also, he's still butthurt
327
00:15:57,031 --> 00:15:59,031
'cause Judy from down the street
sent him an email,
328
00:15:59,184 --> 00:16:02,109
- but it was for her
realty business, so...
- Okay, that's enough!
329
00:16:02,203 --> 00:16:03,444
Forget this.
330
00:16:03,463 --> 00:16:05,354
I thought it'd be nice
hanging with family,
331
00:16:05,448 --> 00:16:06,464
but it's a disaster.
332
00:16:06,615 --> 00:16:08,949
Like Lee Harvey Oswald
working from home.
333
00:16:09,043 --> 00:16:11,135
This is the tenth one
of these this month.
334
00:16:11,362 --> 00:16:13,196
What do you think,
Detective McBackerson?
335
00:16:13,289 --> 00:16:15,198
Yeah, no, they seem unrelated
and random,
336
00:16:15,291 --> 00:16:16,975
and probably accidents?
337
00:16:17,160 --> 00:16:19,218
What was that?
338
00:16:19,295 --> 00:16:23,064
That was "someone's getting
fired," is what that was.
339
00:16:26,044 --> 00:16:28,135
What are you doing, Brian?
We have to go back.
340
00:16:28,154 --> 00:16:29,545
Stewie, it's over.
341
00:16:29,564 --> 00:16:31,731
Rupert's fallen way too deep.
We can't get to him.
342
00:16:31,807 --> 00:16:34,141
But he's my friend.
We can't just leave him there.
343
00:16:34,160 --> 00:16:35,885
I'm afraid we have to, Stewie.
344
00:16:35,887 --> 00:16:37,887
Even if he is muling
your marital aids.
345
00:16:37,905 --> 00:16:39,980
You know what?
I don't care what you do.
346
00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:41,574
I'm going back to save Rupert.
347
00:16:41,726 --> 00:16:44,560
Fine. Go ahead and try.
You'll be back in one minute.
348
00:16:44,562 --> 00:16:46,412
That's just enough time for me
to remember the name
349
00:16:46,564 --> 00:16:50,008
of the main guy in
That Thing You Do.
350
00:16:50,193 --> 00:16:52,510
Let's see, it was
a three-name guy.
351
00:16:52,620 --> 00:16:56,630
Uh, Paul... Paul Michael Scott?
Thomas?
352
00:16:56,683 --> 00:16:58,407
Okay, I just need to go
through every combination
353
00:16:58,426 --> 00:17:01,077
of Scott, Michael and Thomas,
and I'll get it.
354
00:17:01,095 --> 00:17:04,171
Uh, no, wait, Boo, Boo?
Boopy Rafferty?
355
00:17:04,265 --> 00:17:07,341
Boop-- No? Bachman? Todd.
Bachman Todd!
356
00:17:07,360 --> 00:17:09,694
That Thing You Do,
starring Tom Hanks
357
00:17:09,921 --> 00:17:11,103
and Bachman Todd!
Yeah, yeah.
358
00:17:11,256 --> 00:17:13,055
Okay, I see the poster now.
359
00:17:13,057 --> 00:17:15,658
Whew. What a relief.
Okay, mystery solved.
360
00:17:21,207 --> 00:17:23,332
♪ ♪
361
00:17:59,304 --> 00:18:01,245
♪ ♪
362
00:18:28,015 --> 00:18:30,191
♪ ♪
363
00:18:39,010 --> 00:18:40,660
Oh...
364
00:18:48,128 --> 00:18:50,369
Yeah! All right!
365
00:18:50,463 --> 00:18:53,205
Stupid Brick and
the stupid guys.
366
00:18:53,358 --> 00:18:54,857
Probably doing lame stuff.
367
00:18:54,876 --> 00:18:57,635
Wow, this is the longest
Slip 'N Slide in the world.
368
00:18:57,862 --> 00:19:00,363
N-N-N-N-Now, hold up.
Remember the rule.
369
00:19:00,381 --> 00:19:02,531
Before you slide on it,
you gots to yell out
370
00:19:02,625 --> 00:19:03,957
who you miss right now.
371
00:19:04,051 --> 00:19:06,793
Nobody! Whee!
372
00:19:06,888 --> 00:19:09,038
I got to get my friends back.
373
00:19:09,040 --> 00:19:11,274
- All right.
374
00:19:15,655 --> 00:19:17,304
- Guys, wait.
375
00:19:17,398 --> 00:19:19,732
- Peter?
- Why you hanging out with Brick?
376
00:19:19,808 --> 00:19:21,734
Sure, he may be cool and smart,
377
00:19:21,810 --> 00:19:23,327
but he doesn't know you
like I do.
378
00:19:23,554 --> 00:19:24,387
How do you mean?
379
00:19:24,405 --> 00:19:25,979
I know all about you guys.
380
00:19:25,999 --> 00:19:28,407
Quagmire, you like a beer
from time to time.
381
00:19:28,559 --> 00:19:31,060
And, Cleveland, you don't mind
a cold one after work.
382
00:19:31,078 --> 00:19:34,154
And you, Joe, you like to relax
with an ice-cold beer.
383
00:19:34,174 --> 00:19:36,248
Wow, he really does know us.
384
00:19:36,325 --> 00:19:38,009
What do you say?
Let's get out of here
385
00:19:38,160 --> 00:19:39,594
and be friends again.
386
00:19:44,258 --> 00:19:46,409
- I think you guys should
go with him.
- Huh?
387
00:19:46,427 --> 00:19:47,927
I've had fun
with your crew, Peter,
388
00:19:48,079 --> 00:19:50,021
but the truth is,
this whole time,
389
00:19:50,172 --> 00:19:51,931
all they talked about was you.
390
00:19:52,083 --> 00:19:53,916
They did? Li-Like what?
391
00:19:53,935 --> 00:19:55,693
Something about a bet they had
that you won't live
392
00:19:55,920 --> 00:19:57,195
past the age of 50.
393
00:19:57,422 --> 00:19:58,512
You guys.
394
00:19:58,531 --> 00:20:00,013
They noticed you had
your hand in your pants
395
00:20:00,033 --> 00:20:01,941
the whole time
during the Magic Mike.
396
00:20:02,093 --> 00:20:03,275
Only a friend would know that.
397
00:20:03,369 --> 00:20:05,703
They also said you don't know
how to tie your shoes.
398
00:20:05,854 --> 00:20:07,112
You just mash the laces inside.
399
00:20:07,265 --> 00:20:08,522
I do that for time.
400
00:20:08,541 --> 00:20:10,857
So go on, guys,
Peter's your friend.
401
00:20:10,952 --> 00:20:13,026
I'm just some dude on the block.
It's okay.
402
00:20:13,120 --> 00:20:14,286
You're right, Brick.
403
00:20:14,439 --> 00:20:15,862
Because if there's anything
we've learned
404
00:20:16,031 --> 00:20:17,957
after all these years
with Peter, it's...
405
00:20:27,060 --> 00:20:29,060
Stay tuned for
That Thing You Do,
406
00:20:29,211 --> 00:20:31,270
starring Tom Hanksand Bachman Todd.
407
00:20:31,380 --> 00:20:32,563
Aha! I knew it.
408
00:20:32,790 --> 00:20:35,215
Well, Peter, I'm glad
everything's back to normal,
409
00:20:35,309 --> 00:20:36,717
and you got your friends back.
410
00:20:36,736 --> 00:20:38,903
But I feel like you
got off on the wrong foot
411
00:20:39,130 --> 00:20:41,072
- with our new neighbor.
- You're right, Lois.
412
00:20:41,299 --> 00:20:43,241
I'm gonna go take care
of that right now.
413
00:20:45,227 --> 00:20:47,894
Brick, I just want
to apologize
414
00:20:47,914 --> 00:20:49,972
for how things got
started between us.
415
00:20:50,065 --> 00:20:51,490
I can see that
you're a good guy,
416
00:20:51,642 --> 00:20:54,418
and I want to welcome you
to the neighborhood.
417
00:20:56,481 --> 00:20:59,632
What? I was just practicing.
32314
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