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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:09,367 --> 00:00:11,567 - NICE BUILDING. - MM-HMM. 2 00:00:11,567 --> 00:00:13,867 - WHERE? 3 00:00:13,867 --> 00:00:14,933 - WHERE'S THE ZOMBIE? 4 00:00:14,933 --> 00:00:16,400 - UH, HE RAN ONTO THE ELEVATOR, 5 00:00:16,400 --> 00:00:18,000 SO I STOPPED IT BETWEEN FLOORS. 6 00:00:18,000 --> 00:00:20,733 - GOOD STUFF. HOW LONG AGO? - ABOUT, LIKE, HALF AN HOUR AGO. 7 00:00:20,733 --> 00:00:22,133 - YEAH, SORRY. BAD TRAFFIC ON THE 101. 8 00:00:22,133 --> 00:00:23,533 - ISN'T RUSH HOUR GOING THE OTHER WAY? 9 00:00:23,533 --> 00:00:25,267 - ARE YOU BEING A SMART-ASS RIGHT NOW? 10 00:00:25,267 --> 00:00:26,567 - OH, NO. 11 00:00:26,567 --> 00:00:28,233 - WAS THERE ANYBODY ELSE ON THE ELEVATOR? 12 00:00:28,233 --> 00:00:29,233 - PROBABLY. - ALL RIGHT. 13 00:00:29,233 --> 00:00:30,467 SO JUST SO YOU'RE PREPARED, 14 00:00:30,467 --> 00:00:32,333 WHOEVER ELSE IS IN THERE COULD BE A ZOMBIE BY NOW. 15 00:00:32,333 --> 00:00:34,900 - OKAY. UM, COULD YOU NOT SHOOT PEOPLE 16 00:00:34,900 --> 00:00:37,533 AND GET ALL SORTS OF BLOOD AND GUTS ON THE FLOOR, OKAY? 17 00:00:37,533 --> 00:00:39,200 - YEAH, WE'LL TRY OUR BEST TO DO THAT. NOW MOVE. 18 00:00:39,200 --> 00:00:40,900 - OKAY, IT'S JUST IT'S A REALLY NICE BUILDING 19 00:00:40,900 --> 00:00:42,233 WITH REALLY NICE CLIENTS, OKAY? 20 00:00:42,233 --> 00:00:43,900 AND I DON'T WANT TO GET ANY COMPLAINTS FROM PEOPLE. 21 00:00:43,900 --> 00:00:45,600 I TAPED OFF THE LOBBY AND EVERYTHING. 22 00:00:45,600 --> 00:00:47,333 - I SEE THAT. IT LOOKS GOOD. NOW MOVE OUT THE WAY. 23 00:00:47,333 --> 00:00:48,667 - LOOK, I JUST REALLY NEED THIS JOB. 24 00:00:48,667 --> 00:00:50,133 [gun cocks] - YEP, GOT IT. 25 00:00:50,133 --> 00:00:51,333 - OH, GOD. OKAY. - MOVE. 26 00:00:51,333 --> 00:00:54,333 [rock music] 27 00:00:54,333 --> 00:01:02,333 * * 28 00:01:08,967 --> 00:01:10,567 [elevator tone sounds] 29 00:01:13,633 --> 00:01:16,400 [elevator tone sounds, bell dings] 30 00:01:16,400 --> 00:01:17,800 [all snarling] 31 00:01:17,800 --> 00:01:18,933 - APOLOGIES! 32 00:01:37,567 --> 00:01:39,100 - THAT'S HOW YOU BUST ZOMBIES. 33 00:01:39,100 --> 00:01:41,800 - OH, MY GOD, I AM SO FIRED. 34 00:01:41,800 --> 00:01:44,067 [elevator bell dings] - [gasps] 35 00:01:44,067 --> 00:01:45,600 - IT'S ALL RIGHT, PEOPLE, JUST... 36 00:01:45,600 --> 00:01:46,867 - SORRY - WALK THIS WAY. 37 00:01:46,867 --> 00:01:50,067 - REMEMBER THE HAWAIIAN LUAU TONIGHT AT THE ROOF. 38 00:01:50,067 --> 00:01:51,467 - ONE YEAR AGO... 39 00:01:51,467 --> 00:01:53,367 - VAMPIRE, WEREWOLVES, AND ZOMBIES... 40 00:01:53,367 --> 00:01:56,467 - DESCENDED UPON CALIFORNIA'S SAN FERNANDO VALLEY. 41 00:01:56,467 --> 00:02:00,367 - AUTHORITIES REMAIN BAFFLED BY THEIR ORIGINS. 42 00:02:00,367 --> 00:02:04,067 - * ALL THIS NASTY BUSINESS GETS SO ROTTEN * 43 00:02:04,067 --> 00:02:07,067 * I THINK IT'S TIME TO PUT THIS PARTY IN THE GROUND * 44 00:02:07,067 --> 00:02:11,467 * OH, OH, OH, OH, OH, OH, OH * 45 00:02:11,467 --> 00:02:12,900 * WE'RE LOSING ALL CONTROL * 46 00:02:12,900 --> 00:02:14,800 * THE BUILDINGS ALL TURN TO DUST * 47 00:02:14,800 --> 00:02:16,400 * AND I THINK IT'S GETTING CLOSER * 48 00:02:16,400 --> 00:02:19,333 * 'CAUSE THEY'RE COMING FOR US * 49 00:02:19,333 --> 00:02:21,500 - OKAY, PEOPLE, GOOD WORK LAST NIGHT. 50 00:02:21,500 --> 00:02:22,767 I KNOW IT WAS A LONG ONE, 51 00:02:22,767 --> 00:02:24,967 BUT THIS MONSTER PROBLEM IS GETTING WORSE AND WORSE. 52 00:02:24,967 --> 00:02:28,367 THESE ZOMBIES ARE MULTIPLYING FASTER THAN KARDASHIANS. 53 00:02:28,367 --> 00:02:31,067 - HA! - THANK YOU, OFFICER LANDRY, 54 00:02:31,067 --> 00:02:32,833 AND WELCOME BACK FROM YOUR VACATION. 55 00:02:32,833 --> 00:02:35,500 - TRAINING SEMINAR, CAPTAIN. - I KNOW WHAT IT WAS, LANDRY. 56 00:02:35,500 --> 00:02:37,700 STUBECK, PIERCE, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU GUYS-- 57 00:02:37,700 --> 00:02:40,067 SOMEBODY HIDE YOUR CIVVIES WHILE YOU WERE IN THE SHOWER AGAIN? 58 00:02:40,067 --> 00:02:41,733 - ACTUALLY, IT'S TAKE YOUR DAUGHTER TO SCHOOL DAY 59 00:02:41,733 --> 00:02:43,500 AT MY DAUGHTER'S KINDERGARTEN CLASS. 60 00:02:43,500 --> 00:02:44,733 - WHAT'S YOUR EXCUSE, PIERCE? 61 00:02:44,733 --> 00:02:46,200 - I'M GONNA TRY AND BANG HIS KID'S TEACHER. 62 00:02:46,200 --> 00:02:48,333 - UGH. - WHAT? YOU SAID SHE WAS HOT. 63 00:02:48,333 --> 00:02:50,733 - I DID NOT. THAT IS A GROSS MISREPRESENTATION-- 64 00:02:50,733 --> 00:02:52,300 EMPHASIS ON "GROSS." 65 00:02:52,300 --> 00:02:54,200 - UH, I'M AFRAID YOU DID, PAL. - MM-MM. 66 00:02:54,200 --> 00:02:55,733 DID NOT. - SAID SHE WAS HOT. 67 00:02:55,733 --> 00:02:57,300 - I SAID, "SOME OF THE OTHER FATHERS FIND HER ATTRACTIVE." 68 00:02:57,300 --> 00:02:59,067 - IS SHE OR IS SHE NOT HOT? 69 00:02:59,067 --> 00:03:00,800 - I SAID, "SOME OF THE FATHERS AT SCHOOL 70 00:03:00,800 --> 00:03:02,433 SEEM TO FIND HER ATTRACTIVE." 71 00:03:02,433 --> 00:03:03,900 - OKAY, THANKS SO MUCH FOR SHARING. 72 00:03:03,900 --> 00:03:05,733 NOW, THE REST OF YOU TRY TO GET SOME SHUT-EYE. 73 00:03:05,733 --> 00:03:08,067 I KNOW THAT'S NOT AN EASY THING TO DO AT 8:00 A.M. 74 00:03:08,067 --> 00:03:09,633 DISMISSED. 75 00:03:13,500 --> 00:03:16,167 - [shouts] - [snarls] 76 00:03:16,167 --> 00:03:19,167 - SO I FIGURE I'LL START OUT BY INTRODUCING MYSELF. 77 00:03:19,167 --> 00:03:22,900 "HI, I'M OFFICER JOE STUBECK, LUCILLE'S FATHER." 78 00:03:22,900 --> 00:03:24,900 HOW'S THAT SOUND? - THAT SOUNDS NATURAL. 79 00:03:24,900 --> 00:03:26,567 - AND THEN DO YOU WANT ME TO INTRODUCE YOU, 80 00:03:26,567 --> 00:03:28,233 OR DO YOU WANT TO INTRODUCE YOURSELF? 81 00:03:28,233 --> 00:03:29,733 - LET ME ASK YOU A QUESTION. 82 00:03:29,733 --> 00:03:33,067 SO, IF YOU RUN OUT OF BOXERS, DO YOU GO NO BOXERS, 83 00:03:33,067 --> 00:03:35,267 OR DO YOU GET OLD BOXERS FROM THE HAMPER? 84 00:03:35,267 --> 00:03:37,233 - YOU KNOW, HONESTLY, I FEEL LIKE THAT'S GOT TO BE 85 00:03:37,233 --> 00:03:39,900 THE 400TH TIME YOU'VE ASKED ME THAT EXACT SAME QUESTION. 86 00:03:39,900 --> 00:03:43,533 WORST-CASE SCENARIO, YOU GOT FRONT, BACK, INSIDE, OUTSIDE. 87 00:03:43,533 --> 00:03:45,700 - THAT'S WHAT I WAS LOOKING FOR. THANK YOU. 88 00:03:45,700 --> 00:03:47,100 - YOU'RE WELCOME. 89 00:03:47,100 --> 00:03:49,233 SO, WHEN WE GET IN THERE, I'M GONNA INTRODUCE THEM. 90 00:03:49,233 --> 00:03:51,567 I'LL INTRODUCE YOU, AND THEN... 91 00:03:51,567 --> 00:03:54,700 [sighs] - STU, ARE YOU NERVOUS? 92 00:03:54,700 --> 00:03:56,733 - I'M NOT. - OH, MY GOD, YOU'RE NERVOUS. 93 00:03:56,733 --> 00:03:57,867 - MM-MM. 94 00:03:57,867 --> 00:03:59,567 - WHAT DO YOU GOT TO BE NERVOUS ABOUT, MAN? 95 00:03:59,567 --> 00:04:01,400 YOU KILL BLOODTHIRSTY MONSTERS FOR A LIVING, 96 00:04:01,400 --> 00:04:02,900 AND NOW YOU'RE TELLING ME YOU'RE NERVOUS 97 00:04:02,900 --> 00:04:04,400 ABOUT A COUPLE LITTLE TEN-YEAR-OLDS? 98 00:04:04,400 --> 00:04:07,567 - THEY'RE FIVE. DO YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT KINDERGARTEN... 99 00:04:07,567 --> 00:04:09,767 OR MY KIDS? - WHAT'S TO KNOW, MAN? 100 00:04:09,767 --> 00:04:12,233 YOU'LL GO IN, ALL RIGHT? YOU'LL DO YOUR LITTLE SPIEL. 101 00:04:12,233 --> 00:04:13,900 THE KIDS WILL BE PICKING THEIR NOSES. 102 00:04:13,900 --> 00:04:15,567 WE'LL GET OUT OF THERE, AND IT'LL BE AWESOME. 103 00:04:15,567 --> 00:04:17,233 - YOU KNOW, YOU DON'T HAVE TO COME AT ALL. 104 00:04:17,233 --> 00:04:18,667 - WELL, MAYBE I WON'T, ALL RIGHT? 105 00:04:18,667 --> 00:04:20,133 YOU'RE LUCKY I'M EVEN IN THIS CAR. 106 00:04:20,133 --> 00:04:21,467 I'M FEELING KIND OF TIRED, AND NOW YOU'RE TELLING ME 107 00:04:21,467 --> 00:04:22,667 THE TEACHER'S NOT EVEN HOT. 108 00:04:22,667 --> 00:04:24,067 - WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? SHE'S HOT. 109 00:04:24,067 --> 00:04:25,567 - BUSTED. - NO, THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT. 110 00:04:25,567 --> 00:04:27,200 I'M NOT ATTRACTED TO WOMEN OTHER THAN MY WIFE. 111 00:04:27,200 --> 00:04:28,233 - SHE'S HOT. - SOME OF THE OTHER FATHERS 112 00:04:28,233 --> 00:04:29,433 SEEM TO FIND HER ATTRACTIVE. 113 00:04:29,433 --> 00:04:30,900 - I WAS IMPRESSED WITH YOU TONIGHT, PARTNER. 114 00:04:30,900 --> 00:04:32,400 YOU REALLY DID SOME GOOD STUFF BACK THERE. 115 00:04:32,400 --> 00:04:36,067 - THANKS, JOHN-JOHN. - YEAH. 116 00:04:36,067 --> 00:04:37,767 SO... 117 00:04:37,767 --> 00:04:41,233 YOU WANT TO GO GET SOME, UH-- SOME PANCAKES 118 00:04:41,233 --> 00:04:42,600 OR SOME FISH STICKS? 119 00:04:42,600 --> 00:04:44,400 - PANCAKES OR FISH STICKS? 120 00:04:44,400 --> 00:04:46,467 HOW DOES YOUR MIND EVEN PUT THOSE TWO THINGS TOGETHER? 121 00:04:46,467 --> 00:04:49,733 - DO YOU WANT TO GO GET SOMETHING TO EAT OR NOT? 122 00:04:49,733 --> 00:04:51,233 - SURE. - COOL. 123 00:04:51,233 --> 00:04:53,133 - OH, CAN I CALL MY GIRLFRIEND AND INVITE HER? 124 00:04:53,133 --> 00:04:54,733 SHE WAS PLANNING ON HAVING BREAKFAST WITH ME. 125 00:04:54,733 --> 00:04:56,967 - YEAH. YEAH, I DON'T SEE WHY NOT. 126 00:04:56,967 --> 00:04:58,767 - COOL. - NOW, WAIT. 127 00:04:58,767 --> 00:05:00,533 WHEN YOU SAY "GIRLFRIEND," 128 00:05:00,533 --> 00:05:03,067 DO YOU MEAN A GIRL WHO'S A FRIEND, 129 00:05:03,067 --> 00:05:05,067 OR DO YOU MEAN, LIKE, A-A BOYFRIEND? 130 00:05:05,067 --> 00:05:06,567 INSTEAD YOU REPLACED THE "BOY" WITH-- 131 00:05:06,567 --> 00:05:08,833 - I'M GAY, JOHN-JOHN. - RIGHT. 132 00:05:11,833 --> 00:05:13,400 WELL... 133 00:05:13,400 --> 00:05:16,267 THAT EXPLAINS SOME [bleep] NOW, DOESN'T IT? 134 00:05:30,067 --> 00:05:31,100 - AH! 135 00:05:33,767 --> 00:05:35,333 [Kirsten struggling] 136 00:05:35,333 --> 00:05:36,967 - HEY, OFFICER. 137 00:05:38,433 --> 00:05:39,633 - RICO. 138 00:05:39,633 --> 00:05:41,533 - OR DO YOU STILL WANT ME TO CALL YOU AMBER? 139 00:05:41,533 --> 00:05:44,067 DID YOU REALLY THINK I WOULDN'T FIND OUT. 140 00:05:44,067 --> 00:05:45,833 - IT ISN'T WHAT YOU'RE THINKING. 141 00:05:45,833 --> 00:05:48,433 - I THINK IT'S EXACTLY WHAT I'M THINKING. 142 00:05:48,433 --> 00:05:50,167 I GET IT. YOU'RE JUST DOING YOUR JOB. 143 00:05:50,167 --> 00:05:51,433 - NO, NOT EVEN. 144 00:05:51,433 --> 00:05:53,400 I WAS JUST FREAKIN' BABYSITTING MY BOSS' NIECE. 145 00:05:53,400 --> 00:05:56,267 THAT'S THE ONLY REASON THAT I MET YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE. 146 00:05:56,267 --> 00:05:57,867 - HIS NIECE? 147 00:05:57,867 --> 00:06:01,300 YOU KNOW, IT'S REALLY TOO BAD YOU'RE A COP, YOU KNOW? 148 00:06:01,300 --> 00:06:03,333 WE REALLY COULD'VE HAD SOMETHING SPECIAL. 149 00:06:03,333 --> 00:06:06,067 GOOD-BYE, OFFICER LANDRY. 150 00:06:08,333 --> 00:06:09,767 [tires screeching] 151 00:06:21,967 --> 00:06:24,833 - GOT TO KEEP YOU NICE AND SHINY AND DUST-FREE. 152 00:06:24,833 --> 00:06:28,667 * DUST-FREE AND SHINY AS CAN BE * 153 00:06:28,667 --> 00:06:30,933 - CAPTAIN, UM, I-- - LANDRY... 154 00:06:30,933 --> 00:06:32,500 YOU'RE IN MY GUN HOUSE NOW. 155 00:06:32,500 --> 00:06:34,867 THESE GUNS-- THEY'RE LIKE MY CHILDREN. 156 00:06:34,867 --> 00:06:36,367 - CAPTAIN-- - I LOVE THEM DIFFERENTLY-- 157 00:06:36,367 --> 00:06:38,633 SOME NOT AS MUCH AS OTHERS, BUT I DON'T TELL THEM THAT. 158 00:06:38,633 --> 00:06:41,300 - CAPTAIN, I HAVEN'T TOLD YOU EVERYTHING ABOUT YOUR NIECE. 159 00:06:41,300 --> 00:06:42,733 - IS SHE PREGNANT? - NO, NO, NO. 160 00:06:42,733 --> 00:06:45,067 GOD, NO, NOT THAT I KNOW OF. 161 00:06:45,067 --> 00:06:46,533 SHE'S NOT A CYBERBULLY, IS SHE? 162 00:06:46,533 --> 00:06:49,400 I READ UP ON CYBERBULLIES. I DON'T LIKE THEM ONE BIT. 163 00:06:49,400 --> 00:06:51,067 - CAPTAIN, YOU KNOW THOSE PARTIES NATALIE 164 00:06:51,067 --> 00:06:52,767 WAS TALKING ABOUT-- GB/GB AND ALL THAT STUFF? 165 00:06:52,767 --> 00:06:54,200 - YEAH? - WELL, THEY'RE VAMPIRE PARTIES. 166 00:06:54,200 --> 00:06:55,600 THIS GUY RICO THROWS THEM, 167 00:06:55,600 --> 00:06:57,200 AND GB/GB IS WHEN YOU GIVE BLOOD, 168 00:06:57,200 --> 00:06:59,367 AND THEN HE GET YOU BUZZED FROM THIS BLACK LIQUID 169 00:06:59,367 --> 00:07:01,533 THAT COMES OUT OF HIS SALIVA WHEN HE KISSES YOU. 170 00:07:01,533 --> 00:07:02,933 - WHAT? 171 00:07:02,933 --> 00:07:04,933 NATALIE DO THIS? - UM... 172 00:07:04,933 --> 00:07:06,533 - DID NATALIE DO THIS? ANSWER ME. 173 00:07:06,533 --> 00:07:09,100 - YEAH, UM, I THINK-- I THINK SHE MIGHT'VE, 174 00:07:09,100 --> 00:07:10,833 BUT DON'T BE MAD AT HER, 175 00:07:10,833 --> 00:07:12,833 'CAUSE IT COULD'VE BEEN WAY WORSE. 176 00:07:12,833 --> 00:07:14,167 - WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 177 00:07:14,167 --> 00:07:16,433 - A COUPLE OF WEEKS AGO, WE WENT TO A TURNING PARTY, 178 00:07:16,433 --> 00:07:18,867 WHERE THIS GIRL HAD ALL THESE VAMPS DRAIN HER, 179 00:07:18,867 --> 00:07:20,667 AND THEN SHE TURNED INTO A VAMPIRE. 180 00:07:20,667 --> 00:07:23,533 - WHY AM I HEARING ABOUT THIS FOR THE FIRST [bleep] TIME? 181 00:07:23,533 --> 00:07:25,600 - BECAUSE I JUST GOT THROWN INTO A VAN, 182 00:07:25,600 --> 00:07:27,167 AND RICO WAS INSIDE. 183 00:07:27,167 --> 00:07:28,200 - WHO? 184 00:07:28,200 --> 00:07:30,267 - THE VAMPIRE I WAS TELLING YOU ABOUT. 185 00:07:30,267 --> 00:07:32,667 HE KNOWS THAT I'M A COP, AND HE'S PISSED. 186 00:07:32,667 --> 00:07:34,533 - HE'S PISSED? 187 00:07:34,533 --> 00:07:36,600 YOU OUGHT TO BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF, LANDRY. 188 00:07:36,600 --> 00:07:38,533 - CAPTAIN-- - WHERE IS HE NOW? 189 00:07:38,533 --> 00:07:40,367 - I WAS JUST TRYING TO HELP. I-- 190 00:07:40,367 --> 00:07:41,867 WHEN I BECAME FRIENDS WITH NATALIE, 191 00:07:41,867 --> 00:07:43,733 I KNEW THAT I WAS THE BEST CHANCE 192 00:07:43,733 --> 00:07:45,867 AT GETTING ON THE INSIDE OF THE VAMP WORLD 193 00:07:45,867 --> 00:07:48,200 AND FINDING OUT WHAT WAS REALLY GOING ON. 194 00:07:48,200 --> 00:07:49,700 HERE, CAP--CAPTAIN, TAKE YOUR ARM OUT. 195 00:07:49,700 --> 00:07:50,967 IT'S NOT IN THE HOLE. 196 00:07:50,967 --> 00:07:53,067 UM, CAPTAIN, IT'S-- IT'S UPSIDE DOWN. 197 00:07:53,067 --> 00:07:55,067 - I GOT IT. I GOT IT. I GOT IT! 198 00:07:55,067 --> 00:07:56,867 - AND I WAS GONNA TELL YOU. I JUST-- 199 00:07:56,867 --> 00:07:58,367 I KNEW THAT IF I TOLD YOU, 200 00:07:58,367 --> 00:08:00,933 YOU WOULD'VE PUT SOMEBODY ELSE ON THE CASE, AND-- 201 00:08:00,933 --> 00:08:02,667 YOU SAID SO YOURSELF. 202 00:08:02,667 --> 00:08:04,467 - DID YOU I.D. THE VAN? 203 00:08:04,467 --> 00:08:06,167 - RICO DRIVES A BLACK ESCALADE, 204 00:08:06,167 --> 00:08:07,433 AND THE LICENSE PLATE IS-- 205 00:08:07,433 --> 00:08:09,733 - CALL IT INTO DISPATCH AND GET THE HELL OUT OF MY WAY. 206 00:08:09,733 --> 00:08:11,100 - DO YOU WANT ME TO COME WITH YOU? 207 00:08:11,100 --> 00:08:12,767 - I WANT YOUR GUN AND YOUR BADGE ON MY DESK. 208 00:08:12,767 --> 00:08:13,933 YOU'RE OFF THE FORCE. 209 00:08:21,567 --> 00:08:22,933 - MAN, YOU ARE NOTHING LIKE WHAT I PICTURED. 210 00:08:22,933 --> 00:08:24,233 - WHAT YOU PICTURED? 211 00:08:24,233 --> 00:08:25,367 DUDE, YOU DIDN'T EVEN KNOW 212 00:08:25,367 --> 00:08:26,933 I HAD A GIRLFRIEND UNTIL 15 MINUTES AGO. 213 00:08:26,933 --> 00:08:29,700 - YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT A GUY CAN PICTURE IN 15 MINUTES. 214 00:08:29,700 --> 00:08:32,167 - [chuckles] WELL, WHAT DO YOU THINK? 215 00:08:32,167 --> 00:08:34,067 - I THINK CARLA HAS GOOD TASTE. 216 00:08:34,067 --> 00:08:35,567 [women chuckle] 217 00:08:35,567 --> 00:08:37,367 - SO, JULES... - JULIA. 218 00:08:37,367 --> 00:08:38,867 - JULIA... 219 00:08:38,867 --> 00:08:41,267 THE BAR YOU WORK AT-- WHEN I'VE BEEN IN THERE 220 00:08:41,267 --> 00:08:43,100 FLIRTING WITH CARLA, ACTING LIKE AN IDIOT, 221 00:08:43,100 --> 00:08:44,700 YOU'VE BEEN IN THERE THE WHOLE TIME, HAVEN'T YOU? 222 00:08:44,700 --> 00:08:47,533 - YEAH, I SAW YOU, AND YOU DID LOOK LIKE AN IDIOT. 223 00:08:47,533 --> 00:08:49,433 [chuckles] - HA HA. 224 00:08:49,433 --> 00:08:52,067 - BUT I'D ONLY BE JEALOUS IF YOU WERE A GIRL, RIGHT? 225 00:08:52,067 --> 00:08:54,367 - HUH. 226 00:08:54,367 --> 00:08:56,867 SO, CARLA, YOU DON'T GET JEALOUS 227 00:08:56,867 --> 00:08:59,200 IF A GUY IN A BAR WAS FLIRTING WITH JULIA? 228 00:08:59,200 --> 00:09:00,933 - WELL, ACTUALLY, NO, THAT'S DIFFERENT, 229 00:09:00,933 --> 00:09:03,700 'CAUSE JULIA'S BISEXUAL. - WHAT? 230 00:09:03,700 --> 00:09:06,567 - VERY BISEXUAL. - I LIKE THAT. 231 00:09:06,567 --> 00:09:08,833 - AND WE'RE OFF. 232 00:09:08,833 --> 00:09:11,867 - [snarling] 233 00:09:11,867 --> 00:09:14,667 - AND THAT'S HOW I PUT THE "ADVENTURE" 234 00:09:14,667 --> 00:09:15,933 IN VENTURE CAPITAL. 235 00:09:15,933 --> 00:09:18,400 - WIENER. [coughs] 236 00:09:18,400 --> 00:09:21,433 - OKAY, CHILDREN, LET'S MOVE ON TO LUCILLE'S FATHER, 237 00:09:21,433 --> 00:09:23,267 OFFICER JOE STUBECK. 238 00:09:23,267 --> 00:09:25,867 - HUH. RAISE THE ROOF, RIGHT? [applause] 239 00:09:25,867 --> 00:09:28,733 HUH, BUDDY? - YAY! YAY! 240 00:09:28,733 --> 00:09:30,267 - WELL... [clears throat] 241 00:09:30,267 --> 00:09:31,933 LIKE MISS ANDREA SAID, 242 00:09:31,933 --> 00:09:36,200 I'M OFFICER STUBECK, LUCILLE'S DAD. 243 00:09:36,200 --> 00:09:38,867 AND THAT HANDSOME FELLA RIGHT THERE IS MY PARTNER, BILLY. 244 00:09:38,867 --> 00:09:40,833 - UH, POLICE PARTNER. 245 00:09:40,833 --> 00:09:42,867 - SERIOUSLY? YOU THINK THEIR MINDS WENT SOMEWHERE ELSE? 246 00:09:42,867 --> 00:09:44,467 - JUST CHECKING. - [clears throat] 247 00:09:44,467 --> 00:09:46,100 ALL RIGHT, AND THOSE PEOPLE BACK THERE 248 00:09:46,100 --> 00:09:48,267 ARE FILMING US FOR A TV NEWS SHOW. 249 00:09:48,267 --> 00:09:50,733 NOW, WHO KNOWS WHAT A UTF OFFICER DOES? 250 00:09:52,067 --> 00:09:53,133 RIGHT THERE. 251 00:09:53,133 --> 00:09:54,667 - KILL ZOMBIES? 252 00:09:54,667 --> 00:09:55,767 - THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I DO. 253 00:09:55,767 --> 00:09:57,867 I KILL ZOMBIES, SOMETIMES VAMPIRES. 254 00:09:57,867 --> 00:09:59,600 I'VE EVEN CAPTURED A WEREWOLF OR TWO. 255 00:09:59,600 --> 00:10:01,267 - I COULD NEVER DO YOUR JOB. 256 00:10:01,267 --> 00:10:03,267 - AND I COULDN'T DO YOUR EITHER. - THAT'S NOT TRUE. 257 00:10:03,267 --> 00:10:05,467 - YEAH, YOU'RE PROBABLY RIGHT. IT'S PRETTY EASY. 258 00:10:05,467 --> 00:10:08,467 - [clears throat] NOW, WHO WANTS TO LEARN HOW TO KILL A ZOMBIE? 259 00:10:08,467 --> 00:10:09,867 - [clears throat] I'M SORRY. 260 00:10:09,867 --> 00:10:11,433 THE KIDS DON'T REALLY NEED TO BE LEARNING 261 00:10:11,433 --> 00:10:13,233 ABOUT THIS SORT OF THING, DO THEY? 262 00:10:13,233 --> 00:10:15,500 - YES, THEY DO NEED TO LEARN ABOUT THIS--IT'S IMPORTANT. 263 00:10:15,500 --> 00:10:18,000 - WELL, SO IS THE VENTURE CAPITAL BUSINESS. 264 00:10:18,000 --> 00:10:19,933 OTHERWISE, I WOULDN'T BE DRIVING 265 00:10:19,933 --> 00:10:22,933 A BIMMER CONVERTIBLE I NAMED SHAKIRA. 266 00:10:22,933 --> 00:10:24,067 HUH? 267 00:10:24,067 --> 00:10:26,933 WHO ELSE WANTS TO DRIVE A BIMMER CONVERTIBLE 268 00:10:26,933 --> 00:10:28,633 NAMED SHAKIRA? 269 00:10:28,633 --> 00:10:32,033 JANICE AND MY SON, YES. 270 00:10:32,033 --> 00:10:34,900 - OKAY, AND WHO WANTS TO DRIVE A UTF POLICE CAR SOMEDAY? 271 00:10:36,533 --> 00:10:38,367 JUST ABOUT EVERYBODY. THANKS. 272 00:10:38,367 --> 00:10:40,633 - [softly] EVERYBODY. - [mutters] 273 00:10:40,633 --> 00:10:43,633 - OKAY, GREAT. NOW, IF I COULD JUST HAVE MY ZOMBIE... 274 00:10:43,633 --> 00:10:46,700 - OH, YEAH. [clears throat] 275 00:10:46,700 --> 00:10:48,200 [groaning] 276 00:10:48,200 --> 00:10:49,467 [kids groaning, laughing] 277 00:10:49,467 --> 00:10:52,467 [all continue groaning] 278 00:10:52,467 --> 00:10:55,200 - OH, NO, A ZOMBIE. 279 00:10:55,200 --> 00:10:57,567 POLICE. STOP, OR I'LL SHOOT. 280 00:10:57,567 --> 00:10:58,800 - OKAY. 281 00:10:58,800 --> 00:11:01,400 - [groaning] - ZOMBIE! 282 00:11:01,400 --> 00:11:04,400 - KIDS, IT'S BEEN GREAT TALKING WITH YOU TODAY. 283 00:11:04,400 --> 00:11:06,400 - LISTEN, EVERYBODY BE NICE TO MISS ANDREA. 284 00:11:06,400 --> 00:11:07,967 I KNOW I WILL BE. 285 00:11:10,833 --> 00:11:13,067 - [groaning] 286 00:11:18,600 --> 00:11:22,100 [tires squealing] 287 00:11:28,967 --> 00:11:31,067 - HI, THERE. HOW ARE YOU, MR. VAMPIRE? 288 00:11:31,067 --> 00:11:33,233 SORRY TO BOTHER YOU, BUT IF YOU COULD EXIT THE VEHICLE, 289 00:11:33,233 --> 00:11:35,400 I WON'T HAVE TO BLOW YOUR FACE OFF. 290 00:11:35,400 --> 00:11:37,233 YOU HAVE ABOUT THREE SECONDS. 291 00:11:37,233 --> 00:11:40,433 - CAN I HELP YOU WITH ANYTHING, OFFICER? 292 00:11:40,433 --> 00:11:42,833 - ONE, TWO-- 293 00:11:42,833 --> 00:11:45,767 - WAIT, WAIT. UNCLE FRANK, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 294 00:11:45,767 --> 00:11:49,633 - NATALIE. OH, ARE YOU DATING MY NIECE? 295 00:11:49,633 --> 00:11:51,900 THIS IS VERY EMBARRASSING. I... 296 00:11:51,900 --> 00:11:53,233 I APOLOGIZE. 297 00:11:53,233 --> 00:11:55,800 I DIDN'T REALIZE YOU WERE MY NIECE'S BOYFRIEND. 298 00:11:55,800 --> 00:11:57,567 WHAT THE HECK? CALL ME UNCLE FRANK, HUH? 299 00:11:57,567 --> 00:11:59,067 YOU KNOW WHAT? WHY SHAKE? 300 00:11:59,067 --> 00:12:00,367 I SAY, WHY DON'T WE JUST HUG? 301 00:12:00,367 --> 00:12:02,067 [Natalie gasps] - WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 302 00:12:02,067 --> 00:12:05,133 [both struggling] - WHAT ARE YOU DOING? UGH! 303 00:12:05,133 --> 00:12:06,667 - [gasps] OH, MY GOD. - WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 304 00:12:06,667 --> 00:12:08,067 - OKAY, I'LL SHOW YOU WHAT I'M GONNA DO. 305 00:12:08,067 --> 00:12:09,733 YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU LOOK LIKE YOU NEED A LITTLE SUN. 306 00:12:09,733 --> 00:12:11,067 THERE YOU GO. HOW'S THAT FEEL? 307 00:12:11,067 --> 00:12:13,400 HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT? DON'T FORGET YOUR FACE. 308 00:12:13,400 --> 00:12:14,967 THERE YOU GO. - UNCLE FRANK, STOP! 309 00:12:14,967 --> 00:12:16,400 - AAH! AH! AH! 310 00:12:16,400 --> 00:12:19,233 - YOU, MY FRIEND, ARE UNDER ARREST FOR, UM, 311 00:12:19,233 --> 00:12:21,900 LET'S SEE--ENDANGERING THE WELFARE OF A MINOR, 312 00:12:21,900 --> 00:12:23,567 GIVING DRUGS AND ALCOHOL TO MINORS, 313 00:12:23,567 --> 00:12:27,400 STATUTORY RAPE, AND FACILITATING PROSTITUTION. 314 00:12:27,400 --> 00:12:30,067 SO WHY DON'T WE THROW IN A LITTLE ASSAULT? 315 00:12:30,067 --> 00:12:31,833 - UNCLE FRANK, YOU JERK, STOP IT! 316 00:12:31,833 --> 00:12:35,333 - YOU KNOW WHAT? A COUPLE MORE FOR GOOD OLD UNCLE FRANK. 317 00:12:35,333 --> 00:12:38,167 NOT TO MENTION MULTIPLE COUNTS OF MURDER 318 00:12:38,167 --> 00:12:40,733 IN THE FIRST DEGREE. - MURDER? 319 00:12:40,733 --> 00:12:42,400 - SORRY. THAT'S PROBABLY NOT FAIR. 320 00:12:42,400 --> 00:12:44,700 I GUESS WHEN YOU TURN THEM-- ARE THEY DEAD? ARE THEY UNDEAD? 321 00:12:44,700 --> 00:12:47,700 YOU KNOW WHAT? WE'LL LET THE JUDGE DECIDE. 322 00:12:47,700 --> 00:12:50,233 THIS IS GONNA STING A LITTLE BIT. 323 00:12:50,233 --> 00:12:52,300 - AAH! - THERE IT IS. 324 00:12:52,300 --> 00:12:53,733 - AH-HA! AH-HA-HA! 325 00:12:53,733 --> 00:12:55,233 - YOU, YOU CALL YOUR MOTHER. 326 00:12:55,233 --> 00:12:58,067 I WILL MEET YOU BOTH BACK AT THE STATION. THAT IS AN ORDER. 327 00:12:58,067 --> 00:12:59,367 - WHERE ARE YOU TAKING HIM? 328 00:12:59,367 --> 00:13:00,533 - WATCH YOUR HEAD. 329 00:13:00,533 --> 00:13:02,267 DON'T WANT TO GET SUED FOR HURTING YOU. 330 00:13:02,267 --> 00:13:04,067 - AH! 331 00:13:05,900 --> 00:13:08,067 - I LOVE MY JOB. 332 00:13:08,067 --> 00:13:09,867 I LOVE MY JOB. 333 00:13:09,867 --> 00:13:12,733 - SO, JULIA... 334 00:13:12,733 --> 00:13:15,333 ARE YOU MORE ATTRACTED TO MEN OR TO WOMEN? 335 00:13:17,067 --> 00:13:19,900 - YOU KNOW, I CAN'T REALLY ANSWER THAT QUESTION. 336 00:13:19,900 --> 00:13:22,067 IT DEPENDS ON THE PERSON. - HUH. 337 00:13:22,067 --> 00:13:24,733 WELL, LET'S JUST SAY IT'S ME AND CARLA. 338 00:13:24,733 --> 00:13:26,567 [both chuckle] 339 00:13:26,567 --> 00:13:29,800 - WELL, YOU'RE BOTH REALLY ATTRACTIVE. 340 00:13:29,800 --> 00:13:30,900 - I TOLD YOU. 341 00:13:30,900 --> 00:13:32,233 - I MEAN, WITH CARLA, 342 00:13:32,233 --> 00:13:34,900 I LOVE HER EYES AND HER LIPS AND HER HAIR, 343 00:13:34,900 --> 00:13:36,467 AND HER BODY IS-- 344 00:13:36,467 --> 00:13:38,400 - [chuckling] OKAY, THANK YOU, JULES. 345 00:13:38,400 --> 00:13:40,267 - BUT YOU HAVE A GREAT BODY, TOO. 346 00:13:40,267 --> 00:13:42,867 - YEAH, THAT'S WHAT MY CAPTAIN SAYS. 347 00:13:42,867 --> 00:13:44,300 - [chuckles] 348 00:13:44,300 --> 00:13:46,733 - SO, CARLA, WE'VE BEEN WORKING TOGETHER NOW 349 00:13:46,733 --> 00:13:48,167 FOR WHAT, ABOUT A YEAR? 350 00:13:48,167 --> 00:13:49,600 - MM-HMM. 351 00:13:49,600 --> 00:13:51,733 - BEEN THROUGH SOME VERY TOUGH BATTLES. 352 00:13:51,733 --> 00:13:53,400 I MEAN... 353 00:13:53,400 --> 00:13:56,700 YOU GOT TO BE AT LEAST A LITTLE ATTRACTED TO ME, RIGHT? 354 00:13:56,700 --> 00:13:58,433 - WELL, I THINK YOU'RE AN ATTRACTIVE MAN, 355 00:13:58,433 --> 00:14:01,633 BUT I JUST DON'T LOOK AT GUYS THAT WAY... 356 00:14:01,633 --> 00:14:05,233 OR AT LEAST I HAVEN'T IN A REALLY LONG TIME. 357 00:14:05,233 --> 00:14:06,800 - SO LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT. 358 00:14:06,800 --> 00:14:09,400 SO YOU'RE SAYING IF YOU WERE TO KISS ME, 359 00:14:09,400 --> 00:14:11,300 IT'D NO DIFFERENT THAN KISSING YOUR MOM? 360 00:14:11,300 --> 00:14:13,133 - OKAY, THAT'S A STRANGE WAY TO PUT IT. 361 00:14:13,133 --> 00:14:15,600 - OH, I THINK YOU GUYS SHOULD TRY IT. 362 00:14:15,600 --> 00:14:18,733 - THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT. 363 00:14:21,533 --> 00:14:23,833 - [chuckles] 364 00:14:26,200 --> 00:14:28,767 - HMM. 365 00:14:28,767 --> 00:14:30,433 - YOU KISS LIKE A GUY. 366 00:14:30,433 --> 00:14:32,633 - YOU'RE DAMN RIGHT I KISS LIKE A GUY, LIKE FIVE GUYS. 367 00:14:32,633 --> 00:14:34,067 - I LIKE KISSING GIRLS. 368 00:14:34,067 --> 00:14:36,300 - I, ON THE OTHER HAND, LIKE KISSING GUYS. 369 00:14:36,300 --> 00:14:37,600 - ROUND TWO. 370 00:14:46,700 --> 00:14:49,633 - DEFINITELY BETTER THAN MY MOM. 371 00:14:49,633 --> 00:14:51,067 - YOU KNOW, THIS IS GREAT. 372 00:14:51,067 --> 00:14:55,500 I'M REALLY GLAD WE WENT OUT TO BREAKFAST TOGETHER. 373 00:14:55,500 --> 00:14:58,633 [siren wails] 374 00:14:58,633 --> 00:15:01,633 - OKAY, SO WHO'S GONNA TAKE HIM DOWN, HUH? 375 00:15:01,633 --> 00:15:03,367 YOU WANT A CHANCE TO IMPRESS YOUR KID, 376 00:15:03,367 --> 00:15:05,567 OR DO I GET TO PUT ON A SHOW FOR HOTTIE MCSWEET-ASS? 377 00:15:05,567 --> 00:15:08,400 - UH, EXCUSE ME. THAT'S MY DAUGHTER'S TEACHER. 378 00:15:08,400 --> 00:15:10,900 - WELL, IF SHE WAS MY TEACHER, I WOULD POOP MYSELF EVERY DAY. 379 00:15:10,900 --> 00:15:13,067 - UGH! - YOU WANT TO ASK ME WHY? 380 00:15:13,067 --> 00:15:14,233 - NO, I DON'T. - ASK ME WHY I'D POOP MYSELF. 381 00:15:14,233 --> 00:15:15,700 - NO, BILLY, I DON'T WANT TO KNOW WHY. 382 00:15:15,700 --> 00:15:17,133 BILLY, NOBODY'S IMPRESSING ANYONE. 383 00:15:17,133 --> 00:15:18,867 WE'RE NOT GONNA BLOW THIS THING AWAY IN FRONT OF THE KIDS. 384 00:15:18,867 --> 00:15:20,400 - STU, YOU ASKED IF THEY WANT TO LEARN 385 00:15:20,400 --> 00:15:21,933 HOW TO KILL A ZOMBIE, ALL RIGHT? 386 00:15:21,933 --> 00:15:24,200 NOW'S YOUR TIME TO SHINE. - ALL RIGHT, FINE. 387 00:15:24,200 --> 00:15:26,667 YOU DISTRACT THE KIDS. I'LL TAKE OUT THE ZOMBIE. 388 00:15:26,667 --> 00:15:28,233 - FINE. 389 00:15:28,233 --> 00:15:30,900 OKAY, EVERYBODY OVER HERE. 390 00:15:30,900 --> 00:15:33,400 I'M ON AN ESCALATOR. I'M GOING DOWN. 391 00:15:33,400 --> 00:15:36,067 I'M GOING DOWN THE ESCALATOR. OKAY. 392 00:15:36,067 --> 00:15:37,500 LOOK, I'M STUBECK. "OH, I'M GONNA SHOOT A ZOMBIE." 393 00:15:37,500 --> 00:15:38,833 - BILLY, PUT THAT GUN AWAY! 394 00:15:38,833 --> 00:15:40,233 DON'T WAVE THAT GUN IN FRONT OF THE CHILDREN! 395 00:15:40,233 --> 00:15:41,567 - ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT. 396 00:15:41,567 --> 00:15:43,333 YOU WANT TO SEE SOME JUGGLING? 397 00:15:43,333 --> 00:15:44,867 OKAY, HERE WE GO. 398 00:15:44,867 --> 00:15:46,733 YOU GUYS EVER SEEN THE INSIDE OF A JAIL CELL? 399 00:15:46,733 --> 00:15:48,567 YOU WILL. ALL RIGHT, THAT'S GOOD ENOUGH, HUH? 400 00:15:48,567 --> 00:15:50,400 - [snarls] 401 00:15:50,400 --> 00:15:52,500 - DID YOU GET HIM? - I GOT HIM. 402 00:15:52,500 --> 00:15:54,200 - GOOD. THANK YOU. - GET OVER HERE. 403 00:15:54,200 --> 00:15:55,600 - WHOA, WHOA, STAND BACK. STAND BACK. 404 00:15:55,600 --> 00:15:58,633 - WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO? - LISTEN... 405 00:15:58,633 --> 00:16:01,400 [beeping] - WHAT'S THAT? 406 00:16:03,267 --> 00:16:06,533 - THERE'S A BOMB INSIDE THE ZOMBIE. 407 00:16:10,467 --> 00:16:12,300 - IT'S THE VAMPS, BILLY--THEY PUT A BOMB RIGHT IN THE ZOMBIE. 408 00:16:12,300 --> 00:16:14,933 - A BOMB ZOMBIE... A-A "BOMBIE." 409 00:16:14,933 --> 00:16:17,200 A "BOMBIE." HMM? - STOP IT. 410 00:16:17,200 --> 00:16:18,967 BILLY, DO YOU KNOW HOW TO DEFUSE A BOMB? 411 00:16:18,967 --> 00:16:20,900 - NO, I DON'T KNOW HOW TO DEFUSE A BOMB. DO YOU? 412 00:16:20,900 --> 00:16:22,367 - WHY WOULD I ASK YOU IF I KNEW HOW? 413 00:16:22,367 --> 00:16:23,867 - I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S IN THAT MELON HEAD OF YOURS. 414 00:16:23,867 --> 00:16:25,367 - I'M NOT GONNA LET THESE KIDS WATCH A ZOMBIE GET BLOWN 415 00:16:25,367 --> 00:16:26,767 INTO A MILLION PIECES-- WE GOT TO DITCH THIS THING. 416 00:16:26,767 --> 00:16:29,133 - WHERE? WHERE ARE WE GONNA PUT THIS THING? 417 00:16:32,767 --> 00:16:35,100 - GRAB THE LEGS. - WHY AM I ALWAYS GRABBING LEGS? 418 00:16:35,100 --> 00:16:36,567 - GRAB THE LEGS! - FINE! 419 00:16:36,567 --> 00:16:38,267 THESE SHOES ARE, LIKE, SO 1970. 420 00:16:38,267 --> 00:16:39,433 - WHO CARES? 421 00:16:39,433 --> 00:16:41,133 [both grunting] OH, MY GOODNESS. 422 00:16:41,133 --> 00:16:42,567 HE'S A BIG GUY. - HE'S A BIG GUY. 423 00:16:42,567 --> 00:16:44,633 - AH, MY BACK. - AH! 424 00:16:44,633 --> 00:16:46,767 [both grunting, shouting] 425 00:16:46,767 --> 00:16:48,267 - AH, [bleep]! 426 00:16:48,267 --> 00:16:49,633 [children groan] - OH, THAT'S NASTY. 427 00:16:49,633 --> 00:16:51,300 - DON'T USE THAT LANGUAGE, SWEETIE. 428 00:16:51,300 --> 00:16:52,967 - IT'S OKAY. - PUT THAT DOWN. 429 00:16:52,967 --> 00:16:54,467 - ALL RIGHT, LET'S GO. - GRAB IT. 430 00:16:54,467 --> 00:16:56,300 - USE YOUR LEGS. [both grunting] 431 00:16:56,300 --> 00:16:57,767 - OH, GOD DAMN IT! 432 00:16:57,767 --> 00:17:01,300 - UH, LET'S PUT IT IN THE [bleep] CAR. 433 00:17:01,300 --> 00:17:02,600 [beeping] 434 00:17:02,600 --> 00:17:03,933 - THE DUMPSTER, BILLY, THE DUMPSTER. 435 00:17:03,933 --> 00:17:06,367 [beeping rapidly] 436 00:17:06,367 --> 00:17:07,367 - ON THREE. - RIGHT. 437 00:17:07,367 --> 00:17:09,467 - ONE, TWO, THREE. 438 00:17:09,467 --> 00:17:11,100 - GO, GO, GO, GO! 439 00:17:11,100 --> 00:17:13,433 [sustained beeping] 440 00:17:15,067 --> 00:17:16,967 [shouting] WHOA! 441 00:17:16,967 --> 00:17:18,967 - WHOA! OH-HOO-HOO! 442 00:17:18,967 --> 00:17:21,067 [children cheering] - WHOA! 443 00:17:21,067 --> 00:17:23,967 OH! - YEAH! RIGHT? 444 00:17:23,967 --> 00:17:26,400 [cheering continues] 445 00:17:26,400 --> 00:17:28,367 YOU'RE WELCOME, KIDS. 446 00:17:28,367 --> 00:17:30,200 I, LIKE--I POOPED MYSELF A LITTLE. 447 00:17:30,200 --> 00:17:31,933 - SHE'S NOT GONNA WIPE YOU. 448 00:17:38,667 --> 00:17:42,633 - OKAY, I'M GOING TO GO TO THE LITTLE GIRLS' ROOM. 449 00:17:42,633 --> 00:17:43,967 I'LL BE RIGHT BACK. 450 00:17:47,700 --> 00:17:48,967 [slap] - HEY! 451 00:17:48,967 --> 00:17:50,500 - WHAT ARE YOU DOING FLIRTING WITH MY GIRLFRIEND? 452 00:17:50,500 --> 00:17:52,200 - WHAT? I WAS JUST BEING NICE. 453 00:17:52,200 --> 00:17:53,767 - NO, YOU'RE FLIRTING WORSE THAN YOU FLIRT WITH ME. 454 00:17:53,767 --> 00:17:56,333 AND JULIA LIKES GUYS. DID YOU NOT HEAR THAT? 455 00:17:56,333 --> 00:17:57,800 - YES, SHE DEFINITELY HAS SOME OPTIONS. 456 00:17:57,800 --> 00:17:58,967 - YEAH, SHE DOES. 457 00:17:58,967 --> 00:18:00,400 LOOK, THERE'S ENOUGH DRAMA AND JEALOUSY 458 00:18:00,400 --> 00:18:01,900 IN STRAIGHT RELATIONSHIPS. 459 00:18:01,900 --> 00:18:03,700 CAN YOU IMAGINE WHAT IT'S LIKE WHEN YOU PUT TWO WOMEN TOGETHER? 460 00:18:03,700 --> 00:18:05,700 - I WOULD LIKE IMAGINE WHAT IT'S LIKE TO PUT TWO WOMEN TOGETHER. 461 00:18:05,700 --> 00:18:07,867 - JOHN-JOHN, LISTEN TO ME FOR FIVE SECONDS, OKAY? 462 00:18:07,867 --> 00:18:09,533 THERE'S ENOUGH DRAMA IN MY LIFE ALREADY. 463 00:18:09,533 --> 00:18:12,733 I DON'T NEED ANY MORE. - OKAY. FINE. 464 00:18:12,733 --> 00:18:15,600 I HEAR YOU. 465 00:18:15,600 --> 00:18:18,067 - HEY, GUYS. - KIRSTEN? 466 00:18:18,067 --> 00:18:19,867 WHAT'S GOING ON? 467 00:18:19,867 --> 00:18:21,700 - I SCREWED UP. 468 00:18:21,700 --> 00:18:24,367 I WAS HELPING OUT DASHELL, AND THEN MY COVER GOT BLOWN, 469 00:18:24,367 --> 00:18:26,567 AND THEN HE SCREAMED HIS HEAD OFF AT ME, AND THEN... 470 00:18:26,567 --> 00:18:30,233 UM, I THINK THAT I JUST GOT FIRED. 471 00:18:30,233 --> 00:18:32,700 [crying] 472 00:18:32,700 --> 00:18:34,667 - OH, JEEZ. IT'S O-- 473 00:18:34,667 --> 00:18:36,133 IT'S OKAY. - NO, IT'S NOT. 474 00:18:36,133 --> 00:18:37,700 - NO, NO, NO, IT'S OKAY. JUST TAKE-- 475 00:18:37,700 --> 00:18:39,200 NO, DUDE. 476 00:18:39,200 --> 00:18:40,367 IT'S ALL RIGHT. 477 00:18:40,367 --> 00:18:42,867 WE'LL TALK ABOUT IT. 478 00:18:42,867 --> 00:18:45,067 - [crying] - JUST TAKE A DEEP BREATH. 479 00:18:45,067 --> 00:18:47,267 JUST TAKE DEEP BREATHS. 480 00:18:50,167 --> 00:18:52,233 - HI. 481 00:18:52,233 --> 00:18:53,433 - HI. 482 00:18:53,433 --> 00:18:56,367 - THIS IS MY GIRLFRIEND, JULIA. 483 00:18:56,367 --> 00:18:58,533 - HI, JULIA. IT'S NICE TO MEET YOU. 484 00:18:58,533 --> 00:18:59,833 [cries] 485 00:18:59,833 --> 00:19:02,067 - GIRLFRIEND, AS IN GAY. 486 00:19:02,067 --> 00:19:06,733 - THAT'S--THAT'S-- THAT'S NICE. 487 00:19:06,733 --> 00:19:08,433 - OBVIOUSLY, IF I KNEW WHAT WAS REALLY GOING ON, 488 00:19:08,433 --> 00:19:10,233 I NEVER WOULD'VE PUT A ROOKIE ON THE CASE, 489 00:19:10,233 --> 00:19:13,100 BUT HINDSIGHT IS 20/20.. 490 00:19:13,100 --> 00:19:14,900 AS IS MY REGULAR SIGHT. 491 00:19:14,900 --> 00:19:16,433 - AND YOU GOT THAT LITTLE PIECE OF CRAP? 492 00:19:16,433 --> 00:19:18,100 - YEAH, WE GOT HIM IN SOLITARY CONFINEMENT-- 493 00:19:18,100 --> 00:19:19,833 NOT GOING ANYWHERE FOR A LONG TIME. 494 00:19:19,833 --> 00:19:21,567 - YOU OWE YOUR UNCLE A THANK-YOU. 495 00:19:21,567 --> 00:19:23,667 THIS LITTLE ADVENTURE OF YOURS COULD'VE BEEN SO MUCH WORSE. 496 00:19:23,667 --> 00:19:25,600 - ALL RIGHT, WELL, I'M GONNA GO HAVE MYSELF 497 00:19:25,600 --> 00:19:27,433 A LITTLE CHAT WITH RICO, SEE WHAT ELSE HE KNOWS. 498 00:19:27,433 --> 00:19:30,100 IN THE MEANTIME, YOU GUYS CAN STAY HERE AS LONG AS YOU WANT. 499 00:19:30,100 --> 00:19:31,600 I THINK WE GOT SOME, UH, COFFEE 500 00:19:31,600 --> 00:19:33,800 AND SOME FAKE POP-TARTS IN THE KITCHENETTE. 501 00:19:33,800 --> 00:19:35,067 - NO, THAT'S OKAY. 502 00:19:35,067 --> 00:19:36,800 I'D LIKE TO TAKE NATALIE HOME, 503 00:19:36,800 --> 00:19:39,667 LET HER GET SOME SLEEP AND A HOME-COOKED MEAL. 504 00:19:39,667 --> 00:19:40,700 - YOU DO THAT. 505 00:19:40,700 --> 00:19:42,200 AND, NATALIE, AFTER YOU GET RESTED UP, 506 00:19:42,200 --> 00:19:44,200 I'M GONNA NEED TO HAVE A LITTLE CHAT WITH YOU, OKAY? 507 00:19:44,200 --> 00:19:46,767 FIND OUT WHAT ELSE YOU KNOW, ALL RIGHT? 508 00:19:46,767 --> 00:19:48,367 OKAY, SWEETIE. 509 00:19:48,367 --> 00:19:49,900 TALK TO YOU GUYS LATER. 510 00:19:53,533 --> 00:19:54,500 - YOU READY? 511 00:19:58,067 --> 00:20:01,100 I WANT TO GET YOU INTO A NICE, HOT BATH. 512 00:20:01,100 --> 00:20:02,567 GOD, YOU'RE FREEZING. 513 00:20:15,300 --> 00:20:17,000 - AT LEAST HAVE THE BALLS TO TELL THEM 514 00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:18,133 IF YOU'RE GONNA FIRE ME. 515 00:20:20,467 --> 00:20:22,200 - THERE'S A BOMB ON THE ZOMBIE! 516 00:20:22,200 --> 00:20:23,400 - [grunts] - AAH! 517 00:20:25,700 --> 00:20:27,467 - KIND OF IN THE MIDDLE OF A SPEECH HERE. 518 00:20:27,467 --> 00:20:29,233 - AAH! 519 00:20:34,000 --> 00:20:35,667 - OW. - IT'S A DUD. 36338

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