Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,135 --> 00:00:04,660
Boy, that was nice
to finally go out to dinner.
2
00:00:04,738 --> 00:00:06,467
- We should do that more.
- Yeah.
3
00:00:06,539 --> 00:00:10,100
- Mom, Dad! Thank God you're home!
- Rory!
4
00:00:10,176 --> 00:00:13,236
- Girls! Get down here!
- Rory!
5
00:00:15,548 --> 00:00:18,039
- What?
- Yeah, what?
6
00:00:18,118 --> 00:00:20,951
What? How did Rory
get rolled up in a carpet?
7
00:00:22,422 --> 00:00:24,720
They put me in it for spying on them.
8
00:00:24,791 --> 00:00:26,554
You would not believe him.
9
00:00:26,659 --> 00:00:29,822
I don't want to hear it.
Get down here and unfurl your brother.
10
00:00:31,765 --> 00:00:33,596
[doorbell ringing]
11
00:00:35,769 --> 00:00:37,464
- Who are you?
- Anthony W.
12
00:00:37,537 --> 00:00:39,903
Yo, yo, 'sup, dawg?
"B" to the "K" be here?
13
00:00:42,142 --> 00:00:44,508
I'm sorry, what letters
did you want again?
14
00:00:45,278 --> 00:00:46,939
Bridget and Kerry. Shoot.
15
00:00:47,013 --> 00:00:48,173
Ain't this their crib?
16
00:00:48,248 --> 00:00:51,342
We gotsta bounce, dawg.
We be benzing over to the Factory
17
00:00:51,418 --> 00:00:55,582
to catch my dawg DJ Courvoisier spin.
What, what? Fo' sheez, yo.
18
00:00:58,158 --> 00:01:00,422
- Paul, who's that?
- Jehovah's witness.
19
00:01:02,996 --> 00:01:06,261
- It's Anthony.
- There's my boo. Boo one, Boo two.
20
00:01:07,100 --> 00:01:10,365
- All right. Bye, Mom, bye, Dad.
- We'll be home by 11:00.
21
00:01:10,437 --> 00:01:12,530
Hold it.
22
00:01:12,872 --> 00:01:14,999
I know you're a gentleman
and a scholar,
23
00:01:15,075 --> 00:01:17,737
but best be in your rig,
my daughters be grounded.
24
00:01:17,811 --> 00:01:18,937
That's cold, man.
25
00:01:19,012 --> 00:01:22,038
You embarrassed us in front
of the coolest guy in school.
26
00:01:22,115 --> 00:01:24,481
After what you just did
to your little brother?
27
00:01:24,584 --> 00:01:27,417
He's the coolest guy
in your whole school?
28
00:01:27,487 --> 00:01:30,718
- I'd hate to see the dorks.
- You have no reason to punish us.
29
00:01:30,790 --> 00:01:34,248
- We left him a bowl of water.
- Out of reach.
30
00:01:34,661 --> 00:01:36,595
- You could wriggle.
- Lazy.
31
00:01:36,663 --> 00:01:38,597
In your room,
you're both grounded.
32
00:01:38,665 --> 00:01:42,761
What? You've officially destroyed
my life. You're like a life-destroyer.
33
00:01:42,836 --> 00:01:44,201
I hate you.
34
00:01:44,671 --> 00:01:47,538
I hate you, too.
You are the meanest father ever.
35
00:01:47,607 --> 00:01:49,905
You're meaner than Angela's father.
36
00:01:49,976 --> 00:01:52,274
Angela's father did time.
37
00:01:53,613 --> 00:01:54,978
Exactly.
38
00:01:56,683 --> 00:01:57,980
Bathroom, bathroom!
39
00:02:24,978 --> 00:02:26,138
- Hey, babe.
- Hey.
40
00:02:26,246 --> 00:02:28,305
How was your day?
41
00:02:31,518 --> 00:02:33,748
- What are you reading?
- A parenting book.
42
00:02:33,820 --> 00:02:36,152
You should pick one of these up, Cate.
43
00:02:36,222 --> 00:02:38,122
Let me show you something.
44
00:02:38,992 --> 00:02:43,759
"To, Paul. Happy Father's Day, 1996.
Love, Cate."
45
00:02:44,631 --> 00:02:45,791
Look at that.
46
00:02:45,899 --> 00:02:49,596
So, what's the sudden interest
after all my years of begging?
47
00:02:49,669 --> 00:02:52,229
Well, Cate, I just figured it's time.
48
00:02:52,338 --> 00:02:54,602
Our daughters are maturing,
49
00:02:54,674 --> 00:02:57,336
it'd be foolish not to use
expert resources
50
00:02:57,410 --> 00:02:59,275
available right at my fingertips.
51
00:02:59,746 --> 00:03:02,510
They've beaten you down,
haven't they?
52
00:03:02,982 --> 00:03:05,075
They're killing me by inches.
53
00:03:05,652 --> 00:03:08,212
It all started ever since
you went back to work.
54
00:03:08,288 --> 00:03:10,722
- Careful...
- Which I encourage, admire,
55
00:03:10,790 --> 00:03:13,452
and in fact insist upon.
56
00:03:13,526 --> 00:03:18,429
My relationship with Bridget and Kerry
keeps going further south.
57
00:03:18,498 --> 00:03:21,399
I want to go back to the days
when they were happy to see me.
58
00:03:21,467 --> 00:03:23,765
Like when I was a sports writer.
59
00:03:24,404 --> 00:03:28,932
Like when you were on the road and then
came home with armloads of presents.
60
00:03:29,008 --> 00:03:31,704
Of course they were happy,
you were Santa Claus.
61
00:03:31,778 --> 00:03:33,336
That's when they hated me.
62
00:03:35,014 --> 00:03:37,175
Yeah, let's go back to that.
63
00:03:37,951 --> 00:03:41,318
Is that why you're reading this?
To find an easier, softer way?
64
00:03:41,421 --> 00:03:44,982
Chapter six,
"Finger Pointing Never Helps."
65
00:03:45,525 --> 00:03:47,686
This is a tool, not a silver bullet.
66
00:03:47,760 --> 00:03:49,387
Yeah? Well, we'll see.
67
00:03:51,598 --> 00:03:53,862
Hey, girls. How was school today?
68
00:03:53,933 --> 00:03:55,059
- Why?
- Who called?
69
00:03:55,134 --> 00:03:58,365
- Mr. Cassidy? He's out to get me.
- Mrs. Baker, she is a liar.
70
00:03:58,438 --> 00:04:02,169
- The lunch lady, she hates kids.
- What kind of school do you go to?
71
00:04:03,309 --> 00:04:07,439
Nobody called, I was welcoming you home
and wanted to know what's new.
72
00:04:07,513 --> 00:04:10,778
- I'm sleeping at Heather's Saturday.
- I'm at Christina's.
73
00:04:10,850 --> 00:04:13,876
- Unless you punish us for breathing.
- Warden.
74
00:04:15,088 --> 00:04:17,522
- Watch this.
- Oh, please.
75
00:04:17,991 --> 00:04:20,459
You look like you're gonna do
a magic trick.
76
00:04:21,594 --> 00:04:24,563
- Get ready for the "no."
- Girls, that's fine.
77
00:04:24,631 --> 00:04:27,862
Because I think sleepovers
are a great way to...
78
00:04:27,934 --> 00:04:31,028
...practice your socialization skills
with your peers
79
00:04:31,104 --> 00:04:34,596
and to learn independence
in a safe environment.
80
00:04:34,974 --> 00:04:37,101
You might want to use your own words.
81
00:04:39,379 --> 00:04:41,506
- What's wrong with Dad?
- Nothing.
82
00:04:41,581 --> 00:04:44,948
I just want to know what's new.
So, tell me, what's new?
83
00:04:45,051 --> 00:04:46,541
Oh.
84
00:04:46,619 --> 00:04:48,553
Well, Ashley wore this tight shirt,
85
00:04:48,621 --> 00:04:51,055
a button popped off,
you could see everything.
86
00:04:51,124 --> 00:04:53,558
Burke was all [gasps],
Heather was all [growls].
87
00:04:53,626 --> 00:04:56,993
So Heather nailed Ashley.
Ashley was all, "It's an accident."
88
00:04:57,096 --> 00:05:00,065
Heather is such a good arguer,
she could so be a lawyer.
89
00:05:00,700 --> 00:05:02,327
Wow.
90
00:05:04,103 --> 00:05:05,832
And how about you, Care Bear?
91
00:05:05,905 --> 00:05:07,463
Nothing that tops that.
92
00:05:07,573 --> 00:05:10,337
Nothing that requires [squeals]
or [growls].
93
00:05:12,045 --> 00:05:15,344
Listen, it was great catching up.
Go on up and start homework.
94
00:05:15,415 --> 00:05:18,578
If you need any help,
you know who to come to, OK?
95
00:05:20,553 --> 00:05:23,681
You see, that was very close
to a civil conversation.
96
00:05:23,756 --> 00:05:26,486
All because of a few suggestions
from the book.
97
00:05:27,360 --> 00:05:30,329
- Well, you forgot one.
- Oh, yeah.
98
00:05:30,396 --> 00:05:35,265
Hey, girls. I know this
is a confusing time and...
99
00:05:36,369 --> 00:05:38,530
...I love you unconditionally.
100
00:05:46,779 --> 00:05:48,906
Hey, Dad? You know,
101
00:05:48,981 --> 00:05:52,314
even though my rugburns
haven't quite healed yet,
102
00:05:52,385 --> 00:05:55,821
I figured I'd help around the house
since you and Mom work so hard.
103
00:05:55,888 --> 00:05:58,322
Rory, you're not getting a monkey.
104
00:05:59,592 --> 00:06:03,551
Listen, while I was separating
the colors from the whites,
105
00:06:03,629 --> 00:06:06,655
this flier fell out of Bridget's jeans.
106
00:06:06,733 --> 00:06:09,167
into my hand, open.
107
00:06:09,235 --> 00:06:11,795
Rory, nothing falls out of her jeans.
108
00:06:11,904 --> 00:06:14,395
It takes the jaws of life
to get in the pockets.
109
00:06:14,474 --> 00:06:18,376
Well, I found the same thing
under Kerry's mattress.
110
00:06:18,444 --> 00:06:21,072
- While you were making her bed?
- You're ahead of me.
111
00:06:21,781 --> 00:06:24,909
Extreme Rockfest?
I've heard about this thing.
112
00:06:25,485 --> 00:06:29,216
Maybe from the trouble it caused
in Washington, Atlanta and Seattle.
113
00:06:29,288 --> 00:06:31,313
Might not happen in Detroit.
114
00:06:31,991 --> 00:06:34,551
- This Saturday night.
- Saturday?
115
00:06:36,796 --> 00:06:38,821
I guess you have
nothing to worry about.
116
00:06:38,898 --> 00:06:42,425
That's the night they're both
sleeping at their friends'.
117
00:06:43,202 --> 00:06:46,865
Enough trying to get your sisters
into trouble. But good work.
118
00:06:48,408 --> 00:06:51,775
You're right, Dad. It's probably
just a big misunderstanding.
119
00:06:51,878 --> 00:06:54,506
Heather's number is 555-0125.
120
00:06:57,250 --> 00:07:00,413
- Hey, honey.
- You might be interested in this.
121
00:07:03,289 --> 00:07:05,120
Extreme Rockfest.
122
00:07:05,191 --> 00:07:08,092
Yeah, OK, I'll go.
But only because we never go out.
123
00:07:08,161 --> 00:07:12,325
No, this belongs to the girls.
They're lying about their sleepovers.
124
00:07:12,432 --> 00:07:14,525
To go to a concert? Why lie?
125
00:07:14,600 --> 00:07:18,536
Because I'd say no. Concerts are
dangerous, especially extreme ones.
126
00:07:18,604 --> 00:07:23,234
OK, so they lied to us. How are we
gonna punish the little sneaks?
127
00:07:23,309 --> 00:07:26,403
I think somebody needs to take
another look at the book.
128
00:07:29,382 --> 00:07:31,145
If you give me that raised eyebrow
129
00:07:31,250 --> 00:07:34,549
that's intended to show you've
acquired wisdom one more time,
130
00:07:34,620 --> 00:07:36,315
I swear, Paul, it's coming off.
131
00:07:37,056 --> 00:07:38,990
I had something in my eye, OK?
132
00:07:40,193 --> 00:07:42,718
This is under "When You Know
Your Teen Is Lying."
133
00:07:42,795 --> 00:07:46,162
The solution is to present them
with opportunities to come clean.
134
00:07:46,232 --> 00:07:49,395
Are you sure you're not looking
for a lenient punishment,
135
00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:50,766
so they don't hate you?
136
00:07:50,837 --> 00:07:54,000
Paul, there is no such thing
as a "good" bad cop.
137
00:07:54,073 --> 00:07:58,510
The book says we shouldn't
be policemen at all.
138
00:07:58,578 --> 00:08:00,136
- You're doing it again.
- What?
139
00:08:00,246 --> 00:08:01,907
Doing this thing.
140
00:08:02,048 --> 00:08:05,882
Anthony's older brother is coming back
from college to be at this concert.
141
00:08:05,952 --> 00:08:09,319
Howie? The one that dated the teacher?
He's hot.
142
00:08:09,388 --> 00:08:13,017
He's bringing a girl who used to date
the drummer of the opening act.
143
00:08:13,092 --> 00:08:16,027
So we could not be
more backstage. Hello?
144
00:08:16,095 --> 00:08:19,155
Hey, Heather. No! What!
145
00:08:19,232 --> 00:08:23,692
Are you serious? What are you gonna do?
Never mind, I gotta go.
146
00:08:24,370 --> 00:08:27,999
- Oh, my God!
- Heather discovered she's left-handed?
147
00:08:28,074 --> 00:08:32,101
No, Dad called Heather's parents.
He knows I lied about the sleepover.
148
00:08:32,178 --> 00:08:36,512
- I'm so incredibly busted!
- You will never see daylight again.
149
00:08:37,483 --> 00:08:39,110
Aren't you the smart one?
150
00:08:39,185 --> 00:08:44,020
Dad called Heather's parents,
so he probably called Christina's, too.
151
00:08:44,857 --> 00:08:47,826
- Oh, my God!
- You'll never see daylight again.
152
00:08:49,061 --> 00:08:52,030
- [knocking on door]
- [Paul] Girls?
153
00:08:54,433 --> 00:08:57,368
I just wanted to say good night.
154
00:08:58,771 --> 00:09:00,796
- Night.
- Good night.
155
00:09:00,873 --> 00:09:03,603
Oh, and is there anything else
on your minds...
156
00:09:04,110 --> 00:09:07,841
...that you might want to share,
maybe, with me... maybe?
157
00:09:09,348 --> 00:09:11,509
- No? Well played.
- What?
158
00:09:11,584 --> 00:09:12,881
Never mind.
159
00:09:14,053 --> 00:09:15,179
I love you, Beach.
160
00:09:16,322 --> 00:09:18,153
I love you, Care Bear.
161
00:09:19,859 --> 00:09:21,724
OK, what just happened?
162
00:09:21,794 --> 00:09:24,763
Maybe he doesn't care
if we go to the concert.
163
00:09:25,765 --> 00:09:28,325
OK, I am the smart one again.
164
00:09:29,201 --> 00:09:32,967
This sucks. How did Dad know to call
Heather and Christina's parents?
165
00:09:36,742 --> 00:09:37,902
Mom, Dad!
166
00:09:38,010 --> 00:09:40,638
- You want the carpet?
- We can put you in the carpet.
167
00:09:47,119 --> 00:09:50,452
How does Dad know we lied
about our sleepover Saturday night?
168
00:09:50,523 --> 00:09:53,083
- I don't know.
- We have your comics collection.
169
00:09:53,192 --> 00:09:55,092
Talk or we'll give it to Mom and Dad.
170
00:09:55,161 --> 00:09:57,425
So, they're just comic books.
171
00:09:57,496 --> 00:10:01,227
Not the ones over there, the ones
in Rory's pirate treasure chest.
172
00:10:02,668 --> 00:10:06,900
I had no idea Wonder Woman likes
walks on the beach and men who cry.
173
00:10:09,542 --> 00:10:12,636
OK. I found the flyers and told Dad.
174
00:10:12,712 --> 00:10:15,408
I knew it. Why hasn't he punished us?
175
00:10:15,481 --> 00:10:18,211
He's been using
this parenting book on you.
176
00:10:18,284 --> 00:10:20,149
So you'll do what he wants you to.
177
00:10:20,219 --> 00:10:22,312
- What?
- I cannot believe him.
178
00:10:22,388 --> 00:10:23,912
- Now leave me alone.
- Not yet.
179
00:10:23,990 --> 00:10:25,048
Ow!
180
00:10:25,124 --> 00:10:28,616
- So, where does he keep it?
- Forget it, I'm not telling you.
181
00:10:28,694 --> 00:10:31,254
Maybe the girls of the Big Ten
will get you to talk.
182
00:10:33,199 --> 00:10:36,464
I can't believe Dad's been
trying to control us with a book.
183
00:10:36,535 --> 00:10:39,800
- What are we, lab rats?
- You are so issue-ridden.
184
00:10:40,706 --> 00:10:42,606
He marked the part
on your teen lying.
185
00:10:42,675 --> 00:10:46,042
- Which is, like, never.
- OK, listen to this:
186
00:10:46,112 --> 00:10:49,275
"The most effective punishment
when catching your teen lying
187
00:10:49,382 --> 00:10:50,940
is visible disappointment."
188
00:10:51,017 --> 00:10:55,579
It breaks my heart when
he makes his disappointed face.
189
00:10:55,655 --> 00:10:58,215
How is this book
gonna get us to Rockfest?
190
00:10:58,324 --> 00:11:00,758
You have so much to learn
about deceiving Dad.
191
00:11:00,826 --> 00:11:04,057
Right here. We tell the truth,
he's disappointed, we feel bad.
192
00:11:04,130 --> 00:11:07,099
Then he says, "It's your choice
whether or not to defy me."
193
00:11:07,166 --> 00:11:11,933
And that's to guilt trip us into making
the "mature and proper decision"?
194
00:11:12,638 --> 00:11:15,334
We are so at that concert.
195
00:11:25,484 --> 00:11:27,850
Hello, ladies.
196
00:11:33,693 --> 00:11:35,422
Rory, what are you doing in here?
197
00:11:36,395 --> 00:11:38,920
I was thinking of taking up guitar.
198
00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:42,725
You've always been musical.
199
00:11:42,802 --> 00:11:44,360
Move it.
200
00:11:46,205 --> 00:11:47,536
Rory.
201
00:11:48,841 --> 00:11:50,934
They're Kerry's.
I think she's gay.
202
00:11:56,282 --> 00:11:57,579
You know,
203
00:11:57,650 --> 00:12:00,813
I know you're gonna find this stuff
alluring at your age,
204
00:12:00,920 --> 00:12:04,253
but it's insulting to women,
to your sisters and to me.
205
00:12:04,323 --> 00:12:06,883
No, Mom. It says on the cover,
206
00:12:06,992 --> 00:12:09,085
"A Celebration of Women."
207
00:12:10,529 --> 00:12:12,963
Yeah, well, celebration's over.
208
00:12:14,600 --> 00:12:18,127
By the way, what are these
doing in your sister's room?
209
00:12:18,204 --> 00:12:19,671
They're blackmailing me.
210
00:12:19,739 --> 00:12:22,902
They made me tell about Dad's book
so they can outsmart him
211
00:12:23,008 --> 00:12:25,306
and go to a concert.
Punish them, Mother!
212
00:12:27,313 --> 00:12:29,577
That's funny.
213
00:12:29,648 --> 00:12:31,707
No, it's not. Let's go tell Dad.
214
00:12:31,784 --> 00:12:34,548
You've done enough, and I will.
215
00:12:34,653 --> 00:12:36,518
Yes, I will.
216
00:12:36,589 --> 00:12:38,557
Eventually.
217
00:12:40,292 --> 00:12:44,194
- This is never gonna work.
- Kerry, I'm a chapter ahead of Dad.
218
00:12:44,263 --> 00:12:48,632
I'm using offensive attacks opposed to
defensive attacks. It's called strategy.
219
00:12:49,268 --> 00:12:51,236
What do you know about strategy?
220
00:12:51,303 --> 00:12:54,067
Last week I copied
Justin's homework on the Civil War,
221
00:12:54,140 --> 00:12:57,769
there was a guy named Stonewall Jackson,
222
00:12:57,843 --> 00:13:01,609
and he used his best offensive attacks
and best defensive strategy,
223
00:13:01,680 --> 00:13:04,171
it worked awesome,
the Battle of Bull Run.
224
00:13:06,218 --> 00:13:08,743
- That actually sounded smart.
- Yeah.
225
00:13:08,821 --> 00:13:12,655
Do you think Stonewall Jackson
is any relation to Michael Jackson?
226
00:13:12,725 --> 00:13:14,420
And, we're back.
227
00:13:15,060 --> 00:13:16,152
Just do your part.
228
00:13:16,996 --> 00:13:19,556
- So you all set for your sleepover?
- Uh-huh.
229
00:13:20,466 --> 00:13:22,627
I don't see any sleeping bags.
230
00:13:22,735 --> 00:13:26,171
- Heather has an extra bed.
- So does Christina.
231
00:13:26,238 --> 00:13:27,967
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
232
00:13:28,474 --> 00:13:29,839
I see.
233
00:13:29,942 --> 00:13:32,502
- So, no toothbrushes?
- OK, Dad, stop!
234
00:13:32,978 --> 00:13:36,004
- We're not going to a sleepover.
- You're such a snitch!
235
00:13:36,081 --> 00:13:38,174
- Bridget.
- OK, fine.
236
00:13:38,250 --> 00:13:41,947
We're going to the Extreme Rockfest,
I knew you'd never let us go.
237
00:13:42,021 --> 00:13:43,921
I could just kill you right now.
238
00:13:45,491 --> 00:13:48,460
I'm sorry, but I just felt so bad.
239
00:13:49,028 --> 00:13:51,792
Well, girls, I'm really not happy
about this at all.
240
00:13:51,864 --> 00:13:55,493
Although, I am glad you decided
to come clean with me,
241
00:13:55,568 --> 00:13:59,004
I'm just very, very disappointed in you.
242
00:14:00,439 --> 00:14:03,101
Oh, gosh, Dad, I hate it
when we disappoint you.
243
00:14:03,843 --> 00:14:05,401
Doesn't feel good, does it?
244
00:14:06,045 --> 00:14:07,307
No.
245
00:14:08,113 --> 00:14:09,876
What a lesson.
246
00:14:11,717 --> 00:14:14,379
I guess this means you won't
let us go to the concert.
247
00:14:14,453 --> 00:14:17,479
Guys, you know this concert tour
248
00:14:17,556 --> 00:14:20,582
is a traveling riot
with a bad soundtrack.
249
00:14:20,659 --> 00:14:24,220
There have been fights, arrests
and skirmishes with the police
250
00:14:24,330 --> 00:14:25,991
in every city.
251
00:14:26,065 --> 00:14:27,760
- I don't want you to go.
- Dad...
252
00:14:27,833 --> 00:14:30,666
But I'm going to leave
the choice up to you.
253
00:14:30,736 --> 00:14:34,502
I'm not always going to be there
to make decisions for you.
254
00:14:35,241 --> 00:14:37,709
You're old enough
to make your own choices.
255
00:14:37,776 --> 00:14:40,540
Just know,
that whatever you decide...
256
00:14:41,847 --> 00:14:44,680
...you're gonna have to live
with the consequences.
257
00:14:51,023 --> 00:14:52,547
I told you this would work.
258
00:14:53,959 --> 00:14:56,325
- He's watching us.
- What should we do?
259
00:14:56,428 --> 00:14:58,726
Pretend we're thinking about it.
260
00:14:58,797 --> 00:15:01,061
Look contrite.
261
00:15:04,536 --> 00:15:06,367
No, pensive.
262
00:15:08,807 --> 00:15:12,174
OK, like you washed
your favorite pair of shoes.
263
00:15:14,980 --> 00:15:16,538
Perfect.
264
00:15:20,085 --> 00:15:21,416
What are you doing?
265
00:15:21,487 --> 00:15:23,580
Teaching the girls
a valuable lesson.
266
00:15:25,424 --> 00:15:27,756
- Where are they?
- In the palm of my hand.
267
00:15:27,826 --> 00:15:29,487
Check it out.
268
00:15:31,697 --> 00:15:33,961
Well, I see an empty living room.
269
00:15:34,033 --> 00:15:36,194
Oh, no.
They probably just went upstairs
270
00:15:36,268 --> 00:15:38,429
to take a long, hard
look at themselves.
271
00:15:38,537 --> 00:15:40,061
[car engine starting]
272
00:15:40,139 --> 00:15:42,403
Is there a car upstairs?
273
00:15:42,474 --> 00:15:44,965
- The book said...
- They read the book.
274
00:15:45,044 --> 00:15:47,911
They read the book? Oh, no.
275
00:15:47,980 --> 00:15:50,847
That's bad.
276
00:15:50,916 --> 00:15:52,474
That's not... that's bad.
277
00:15:57,389 --> 00:15:58,754
[Paul] Bridget, Kerry?
278
00:15:58,824 --> 00:16:01,588
Beach, Care Bear?
279
00:16:02,561 --> 00:16:04,324
Over here, dude.
280
00:16:04,863 --> 00:16:07,024
- I'm Care Bear.
- You?
281
00:16:07,132 --> 00:16:08,292
Yeah, man.
282
00:16:08,400 --> 00:16:11,062
'Cause I'm as big as a bear
and I care.
283
00:16:13,439 --> 00:16:15,532
- Oh, my God.
- So what do you need?
284
00:16:15,607 --> 00:16:18,167
My daughters! Kerry, Bridget!
285
00:16:18,344 --> 00:16:19,902
Anthony!
286
00:16:20,813 --> 00:16:22,940
Thank God!
I never thought I'd say that.
287
00:16:23,015 --> 00:16:26,280
Yo, Mr. Henn,
I can't be seen with you here, dawg.
288
00:16:26,352 --> 00:16:28,286
- You ain't cool.
- Bridget and Kerry?
289
00:16:28,988 --> 00:16:32,355
"B" and "K", where they be... are?
Where are they?
290
00:16:32,424 --> 00:16:34,483
I don't know.
Maybe they inside.
291
00:16:34,960 --> 00:16:37,121
I ain't gots no Lojack on your ladies.
292
00:16:37,229 --> 00:16:40,665
I ain't gots no X-ray vision
or Superman whatnot. Shoot.
293
00:16:40,733 --> 00:16:42,496
Don't tempt me.
294
00:16:42,601 --> 00:16:45,764
- Where can I buy tickets?
- They sold out for weeks, dawg.
295
00:16:45,871 --> 00:16:49,705
You gotsta hit up that scalper-dawg.
He been scalp-a-lacking all night,
296
00:16:49,775 --> 00:16:53,108
doing some fizoynne bidness,
bling-bling... nahmeen?
297
00:16:53,178 --> 00:16:55,009
- You're coming with me.
- For what?
298
00:16:55,080 --> 00:16:58,140
- Translation.
- Come on, Mr. Hennessy. Geez.
299
00:17:00,586 --> 00:17:04,488
I couldn't find them. I don't know
where they are. Call the police.
300
00:17:04,556 --> 00:17:08,925
I will never forgive myself if anything
happens to them before I punish them.
301
00:17:09,828 --> 00:17:11,796
- Honey, calm down.
- Calm down?!
302
00:17:11,897 --> 00:17:15,458
How am I supposed to calm down?
I can't believe they manipulated me
303
00:17:15,567 --> 00:17:18,127
- with a parenting book.
- Like you did to them?
304
00:17:19,004 --> 00:17:21,871
I'm a parent,
I'm who the book is for.
305
00:17:23,542 --> 00:17:26,705
If you sit there and attack me
while our babies are missing,
306
00:17:26,779 --> 00:17:28,644
you're not the woman I married.
307
00:17:29,948 --> 00:17:33,475
- For God's sake, Paul.
- It's your fault, you gave me the book!
308
00:17:33,552 --> 00:17:34,678
Book! Ha!
309
00:17:34,753 --> 00:17:37,916
It's a timebomb,
ticking in this house since 1996.
310
00:17:38,023 --> 00:17:40,890
Ticking, ticking, ticking.
311
00:17:40,959 --> 00:17:43,792
Get over yourself,
the girls are upstairs.
312
00:17:43,862 --> 00:17:46,387
They came home
a half hour after you left.
313
00:17:47,599 --> 00:17:51,535
Of course they did because the book
works in the hands of a skilled parent.
314
00:17:53,238 --> 00:17:55,672
Do you even know what you're saying?
315
00:17:55,741 --> 00:17:59,871
Without that stupid plan and the book,
they would never have gone.
316
00:17:59,945 --> 00:18:03,108
You wouldn't have gone,
we wouldn't have been worried sick.
317
00:18:03,182 --> 00:18:05,343
I'm not saying the plan
is without flaws.
318
00:18:05,451 --> 00:18:08,909
The important thing is the girls
learned a lesson by themselves.
319
00:18:08,987 --> 00:18:10,545
Oh, bull.
320
00:18:10,656 --> 00:18:14,183
The important thing is
you didn't have to be the bad guy.
321
00:18:14,259 --> 00:18:16,420
OK, I give. I hate being the bad guy.
322
00:18:16,495 --> 00:18:18,929
Happy? I hate it!
I'll always hate it.
323
00:18:19,898 --> 00:18:23,459
Now, look, Paul, we all want
to be friends with our kids.
324
00:18:23,569 --> 00:18:26,265
But sometimes,
you have to be a parent first.
325
00:18:27,539 --> 00:18:31,100
- Yeah, so what do I do?
- Go be a father.
326
00:18:31,677 --> 00:18:33,008
Go on.
327
00:18:35,514 --> 00:18:37,744
And don't do that eyebrow thing.
328
00:18:43,755 --> 00:18:47,191
- It was the greatest concert ever.
- And we actually left.
329
00:18:47,259 --> 00:18:50,490
What's wrong with us?
Why did we start feeling so sucky?
330
00:18:50,562 --> 00:18:51,927
[knocking on door]
331
00:18:54,900 --> 00:18:57,664
- So, how was the concert?
- Terrible.
332
00:18:57,736 --> 00:19:00,227
We felt so guilty
we left after one song.
333
00:19:00,305 --> 00:19:02,136
Your stupid book works.
334
00:19:03,709 --> 00:19:05,870
Forget about the book. Yes.
335
00:19:09,982 --> 00:19:12,212
I came up here to call a truce.
336
00:19:12,885 --> 00:19:15,217
- Are you playing us again?
- No.
337
00:19:15,287 --> 00:19:16,845
Unless you're playing me.
338
00:19:16,955 --> 00:19:19,788
No, no, no.
It is a truce, OK?
339
00:19:20,726 --> 00:19:23,593
I'm tired of what's
going on between us.
340
00:19:23,662 --> 00:19:27,894
I try to fool you, you try to fool me,
it's like we're playing a game here.
341
00:19:28,934 --> 00:19:32,426
You're right, Dad.
I think we should have more freedom.
342
00:19:32,504 --> 00:19:35,064
How did you get that
from what I just...
343
00:19:35,174 --> 00:19:37,199
No, never mind,
I don't want to know.
344
00:19:38,043 --> 00:19:42,810
Let's stop this gamesmanship and
try to be more honest with each other.
345
00:19:42,881 --> 00:19:44,371
OK, I'll start.
346
00:19:44,449 --> 00:19:46,314
Why'd you use the book on us anyway?
347
00:19:48,053 --> 00:19:49,543
Because...
348
00:19:49,621 --> 00:19:51,919
[clearing throat]
Well, I...
349
00:19:51,990 --> 00:19:54,049
...I thought, maybe...
350
00:19:54,126 --> 00:19:56,822
I don't know. I...
I mean, um...
351
00:19:56,895 --> 00:19:58,760
I was scared that you hated me.
352
00:19:59,998 --> 00:20:03,263
- Why would you think that?
- Because you said you hated me.
353
00:20:05,604 --> 00:20:08,539
When we say we hate you,
we don't actually mean it.
354
00:20:09,374 --> 00:20:11,342
It's just the way we talk.
355
00:20:13,278 --> 00:20:15,178
Well, it hurts my feelings.
356
00:20:16,648 --> 00:20:19,276
We didn't even know
we could hurt your feelings.
357
00:20:19,618 --> 00:20:21,848
Why did you use the book against me?
358
00:20:21,920 --> 00:20:25,014
We really hate not going
to concerts and stuff.
359
00:20:27,125 --> 00:20:29,685
Dad, we're also sorry
if we made you worry.
360
00:20:29,761 --> 00:20:32,389
You're forgiven, OK?
361
00:20:32,464 --> 00:20:35,399
You'll have plenty of time
to think about it next weekend
362
00:20:35,467 --> 00:20:37,628
while you clean the attic
as punishment.
363
00:20:37,736 --> 00:20:40,899
- What?
- We were going to Cedar Point.
364
00:20:40,973 --> 00:20:42,338
Well, now you're not.
365
00:20:42,441 --> 00:20:44,568
You are the worst father ever.
366
00:20:44,643 --> 00:20:46,941
[overlapping arguing]
367
00:20:47,012 --> 00:20:49,378
- I hate you!
- I love you, too.
368
00:20:49,481 --> 00:20:51,506
- We really mean it.
- We totally mean it.
369
00:20:57,122 --> 00:20:59,420
Well, it's official.
They hate me again.
370
00:20:59,992 --> 00:21:02,961
Congratulations.
Maybe this will make you feel better.
371
00:21:04,763 --> 00:21:07,391
Red Wings, center ice.
Where did you get these?
372
00:21:07,466 --> 00:21:09,400
Shoot.
373
00:21:10,168 --> 00:21:13,729
I was kicking it with my partner,
Anthony W, and I gave him the 411
374
00:21:13,839 --> 00:21:16,399
on how he got "B" to the "K"
all grounded and whatnot.
375
00:21:16,475 --> 00:21:21,139
He said, "Damn, Mrs. Henn.
That's cold. I gotsta make that right."
376
00:21:21,213 --> 00:21:25,513
So he hooked me these
fizoynne ducats, nahmeen?
30173
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.