Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:18,751 --> 00:00:21,718
¶ It's very clear ¶
2
00:00:21,720 --> 00:00:26,522
¶ our love is here to stay ¶
3
00:00:26,524 --> 00:00:29,424
¶ not for a year ¶
4
00:00:29,426 --> 00:00:33,760
¶ but ever and a day ¶
5
00:00:33,762 --> 00:00:38,330
¶ the radio and the telephone ¶
6
00:00:38,332 --> 00:00:42,067
¶ and the movies that we know ¶
7
00:00:42,069 --> 00:00:45,537
¶ may just be passing fancies ¶
8
00:00:45,539 --> 00:00:49,440
¶ and in time may go ¶
9
00:00:49,442 --> 00:00:52,676
¶ but, oh-oh, my dear ¶
10
00:00:52,678 --> 00:00:57,346
¶ our love is here to stay ¶
11
00:00:57,348 --> 00:01:00,816
¶ together we're ¶
12
00:01:00,818 --> 00:01:04,685
¶ going a long, long way ¶
13
00:01:04,687 --> 00:01:08,321
¶ in time
the rockies may crumble ¶
14
00:01:08,323 --> 00:01:10,623
¶ Gibraltar may tumble ¶
15
00:01:10,625 --> 00:01:12,825
¶ they're only made of Clay ¶
16
00:01:12,827 --> 00:01:17,562
¶ but our love is here ¶
17
00:01:17,564 --> 00:01:20,997
¶ to stay ¶
18
00:01:21,632 --> 00:01:24,299
¶ it's very clear ¶
19
00:01:24,301 --> 00:01:28,235
¶ our love is here to stay ¶
20
00:01:28,237 --> 00:01:30,904
¶ together we're ¶
21
00:01:30,906 --> 00:01:35,140
¶ goin' a long, long
long, long way ¶
22
00:01:35,142 --> 00:01:38,809
¶ in time
the rockies may crumble ¶
23
00:01:38,811 --> 00:01:40,710
¶ Gibraltar may tumble ¶
24
00:01:40,712 --> 00:01:43,846
¶ they're only made of Clay ¶
25
00:01:43,848 --> 00:01:48,150
¶ but our love is here ¶
26
00:01:48,152 --> 00:01:52,654
¶ to stay ¶¶
27
00:02:13,743 --> 00:02:16,744
¶¶
28
00:02:16,746 --> 00:02:18,812
¶¶ Charge!
29
00:02:18,814 --> 00:02:23,283
It has come down to this: Eight
seconds to go, one possession.
30
00:02:23,285 --> 00:02:28,787
Marv Albert with bill walton from the
America west arena in Phoenix, Arizona.
31
00:02:28,789 --> 00:02:31,890
I can't hear myself
over the crowd.
32
00:02:31,892 --> 00:02:34,893
If the suns win,
they go to the finals.
33
00:02:34,895 --> 00:02:36,728
If they lose, it means
going back to San Antonio.
34
00:02:36,730 --> 00:02:40,498
We got eight seconds. That's plenty of time.
Let's run a straight line.
35
00:02:40,500 --> 00:02:45,002
Majerle, you take the ball out, bring k.J.
Up, get it to him, and get through.
36
00:02:45,004 --> 00:02:48,071
Chuck's gonna be at the top of
the key; Kick it back to him.
37
00:02:48,073 --> 00:02:50,139
Chuck, you win the game.
Get me the ball.
38
00:02:50,141 --> 00:02:53,275
- No time outs left. Now let's go!
- Suns!
39
00:02:53,277 --> 00:02:56,144
This is what it's all about.
Game-winning time.
40
00:02:56,146 --> 00:02:59,447
- I'm looking for barkley to step up right here.
- What a shot!
41
00:02:59,449 --> 00:03:03,451
For those who just tuned in, David
Robinson fouled out a moment ago.
42
00:03:03,453 --> 00:03:07,588
For "the admiral," 43 points, get barkley!
Don't foul!
43
00:03:07,590 --> 00:03:10,090
21 rebounds.
All right, here we go.
44
00:03:10,092 --> 00:03:12,592
Dan majerle will inbound
the basketball,
45
00:03:12,594 --> 00:03:14,393
the suns one possession
from elimination.
46
00:03:14,395 --> 00:03:18,163
They're going wild here in Phoenix.
Kevin Johnson takes it.
47
00:03:18,165 --> 00:03:21,900
Moves to the right side. Johnson
setting it up, looking for barkley.
48
00:03:21,902 --> 00:03:26,570
We're down to six
as barkley angles for the shot.
49
00:03:26,572 --> 00:03:30,006
Barkley to his left! Barkley checking the clock!
Three, two, one...
50
00:03:30,008 --> 00:03:34,143
Barkley with the release!
51
00:03:34,145 --> 00:03:35,511
Yes! It's all over!
52
00:03:35,513 --> 00:03:39,381
Charles barkley has put the
Phoenix suns in the nba finals.
53
00:03:39,383 --> 00:03:44,752
The most dramatic victory in the
history of the suns' franchise.
54
00:03:47,890 --> 00:03:51,724
No basket! The shot was after the buzzer!
Game's over!
55
00:03:51,726 --> 00:03:53,292
Are you crazy? No, no!
No, no, no!
56
00:03:53,294 --> 00:03:57,729
- Are you crazy?
- You didn't get it off. You were late!
57
00:03:57,731 --> 00:04:00,465
- He got it off!
- He didn't get it off, Dan!
58
00:04:00,467 --> 00:04:02,066
He got it off! Hey, hey!
59
00:04:02,068 --> 00:04:03,934
You're wrong!
You did not get it off.
60
00:04:03,936 --> 00:04:06,970
You did not get it off.
That is total bullshit.
61
00:04:06,972 --> 00:04:08,805
Hey, watch yourself.
That's total bullshit!
62
00:04:08,807 --> 00:04:11,908
You were late. Jack called it good!
Ask for help!
63
00:04:11,910 --> 00:04:14,210
I don't need any help.
You didn't get it off!
64
00:04:14,212 --> 00:04:16,712
Bullshit! That was total bullshit!
Watch your language!
65
00:04:16,714 --> 00:04:19,781
You wanna play next game? Watch yourself, Charles!
You suck! You suck!
66
00:04:19,783 --> 00:04:23,117
Watch yourself. That's it.
No basket. Game's over!
67
00:04:23,119 --> 00:04:25,085
I don't want to protect you,
but I have to.
68
00:04:25,087 --> 00:04:30,923
Bullshit! Bullshit!
Bullshit! Bullshit!
69
00:04:30,925 --> 00:04:35,660
The crowd appears to be
voicing its displeasure.
70
00:04:35,662 --> 00:04:38,095
Hey, Charles! Charles!
71
00:04:38,097 --> 00:04:39,963
I'll see you in San Antonio!
72
00:04:39,965 --> 00:04:43,266
- You'll see me! You'll see me kick your ass!
- Ahh!
73
00:04:43,268 --> 00:04:47,736
I sure wouldn't want to be Mickey
Gordon tonight or any other night...
74
00:04:47,738 --> 00:04:50,238
The rest of my life
here in Phoenix.
75
00:04:50,240 --> 00:04:51,973
I hope you die!
76
00:04:51,975 --> 00:04:54,842
- You need help on that?
- No, I saw it. He was late.
77
00:04:54,844 --> 00:04:57,110
Let's get you out of here.
This is not my jacket.
78
00:04:57,112 --> 00:04:59,278
Screw your jacket!
Let's just get out of here.
79
00:04:59,280 --> 00:05:01,713
As they lead Mickey Gordon
off the court,
80
00:05:01,715 --> 00:05:04,882
you can only think, as long as
they play this game of basketball,
81
00:05:04,884 --> 00:05:08,051
they'll be talking about
that controversial call.
82
00:05:08,053 --> 00:05:10,920
For bill walton,
I'm Marv Albert.
83
00:05:10,922 --> 00:05:13,255
I've been a sportswriter
for 20 years.
84
00:05:13,257 --> 00:05:15,323
I've covered every great event,
and I'm sitting here,
85
00:05:15,325 --> 00:05:20,328
watching my best friend make the gutsiest
call in the history of basketball.
86
00:05:20,330 --> 00:05:22,663
They ran it on every news show
in America for two days.
87
00:05:22,665 --> 00:05:26,733
Don't sit Charles barkley and referee
Mickey Gordon together at a dinner party.
88
00:05:26,735 --> 00:05:31,003
The sports world is still stunned
by this controversial call.
89
00:05:31,005 --> 00:05:33,605
Gordon remains in seclusion
under police guard.
90
00:05:33,607 --> 00:05:39,443
Bravo, Mickey Gordon. It's this kind of
leadership and decision-making we need...
91
00:05:39,445 --> 00:05:41,144
In the white house.
92
00:05:41,146 --> 00:05:44,547
No news, no weather,
no theater reviews.
93
00:05:44,549 --> 00:05:47,550
Just that. Over and over again.
And you know what?
94
00:05:47,552 --> 00:05:51,753
Mickey got it right. Right there, live.
On the spot.
95
00:05:51,755 --> 00:05:53,888
He got it right.
The shot was late.
96
00:05:53,890 --> 00:05:58,057
By a hundredth of a second.
Oh, God!
97
00:05:58,059 --> 00:05:59,825
Honey, that's an amazing story.
98
00:05:59,827 --> 00:06:03,995
If only I liked basketball,
I really would have liked it.
99
00:06:03,997 --> 00:06:05,629
I'm kidding. I'm kidding.
100
00:06:05,631 --> 00:06:07,864
Welcome to Helen's. Can I
get you something to drink?
101
00:06:07,866 --> 00:06:13,369
We're waiting for other people. Then we'll
order some champagne. We're getting married.
102
00:06:13,371 --> 00:06:16,972
- Fine with me.
- How's the house wine?
103
00:06:16,974 --> 00:06:19,641
It's like me.
Fruity, yet oddly appealing.
104
00:06:19,643 --> 00:06:24,645
Oh, we'll wait. You know, he'll wait.
I'll have a glass of red.
105
00:06:24,647 --> 00:06:27,047
You got it.
106
00:06:27,049 --> 00:06:29,916
I'm a little nervous, all right?
About what?
107
00:06:29,918 --> 00:06:32,018
About meeting all of your friends.
Oh.
108
00:06:32,020 --> 00:06:37,656
About the fact that they're flying to New York
from all over the country to... look at me.
109
00:06:37,658 --> 00:06:39,557
I'm gonna feel
like a show horse.
110
00:06:39,559 --> 00:06:43,660
Hey, they'll love you. You already met Craig and Lucy.
They were wild for you.
111
00:06:43,662 --> 00:06:45,161
Yeah?
112
00:06:45,163 --> 00:06:47,763
Mickey's the greatest. I can't
wait for you to meet him.
113
00:06:47,765 --> 00:06:49,564
I tell you, it's unbelievable.
114
00:06:49,566 --> 00:06:51,899
Three months ago, I am this
confirmed single dope.
115
00:06:51,901 --> 00:06:56,803
I'm living in New York, I'm writing for the
paper I used to deliver when I was a kid.
116
00:06:56,805 --> 00:07:00,139
And I get your fax.
One little number off.
117
00:07:00,141 --> 00:07:02,608
And ya-bing! We both hit our hearts.
I know.
118
00:07:02,610 --> 00:07:06,144
Then I started faxing you
and you started faxing me.
119
00:07:06,146 --> 00:07:11,715
And pretty soon we're just...
faxing each other's brains out.
120
00:07:11,717 --> 00:07:13,249
Oh. Mmm.
121
00:07:13,251 --> 00:07:14,683
House red.
122
00:07:14,685 --> 00:07:17,485
Thanks. I think it's got
to be the strangest way...
123
00:07:17,487 --> 00:07:21,255
For two people to get
together I ever heard of.
124
00:07:21,257 --> 00:07:23,590
Hmm, no. No?
125
00:07:23,592 --> 00:07:25,491
Mickey and Ellen
are the current titleholders...
126
00:07:25,493 --> 00:07:29,494
For the strangest getting together,
at least in their weight class.
127
00:07:29,496 --> 00:07:31,095
How did they get together?
128
00:07:31,097 --> 00:07:34,497
She helped bury his father.
129
00:07:34,932 --> 00:07:36,431
Excuse me?
130
00:07:36,433 --> 00:07:39,700
No, no. I'm gonna wait for
Mickey to tell that story.
131
00:07:39,702 --> 00:07:42,469
Oh. Whoa. No way.
What, are you crazy?
132
00:07:42,471 --> 00:07:46,906
You can't start a story, "she helped
bury his father," and then stop.
133
00:07:46,908 --> 00:07:49,108
That's not allowed.
Come on, come on.
134
00:07:49,110 --> 00:07:51,577
All right. Here we go.
135
00:07:51,579 --> 00:07:54,613
This was a few years ago.
136
00:07:54,615 --> 00:07:56,214
Mickey's father died. Aw.
137
00:07:56,216 --> 00:07:58,516
No, it's good. Mickey hated him.
What?
138
00:07:58,518 --> 00:08:01,819
Everybody did. He abandoned his
family when Mickey was a kid.
139
00:08:01,821 --> 00:08:05,255
When he left, the neighborhood
had a street fair to celebrate.
140
00:08:05,257 --> 00:08:08,658
I won a fishing rod. It was
the best time we ever had.
141
00:08:08,660 --> 00:08:12,061
Anyway, he dies... Finally.
142
00:08:12,063 --> 00:08:15,464
And the funeral service is
in the cargo area at j.F.K.
143
00:08:15,466 --> 00:08:19,234
Why? Mickey's old man wants
to be buried in France.
144
00:08:19,236 --> 00:08:22,770
Was he French? No. He was
in the d day invasion.
145
00:08:22,772 --> 00:08:24,738
I think on our side,
but I'm not sure.
146
00:08:24,740 --> 00:08:28,541
His whole platoon, except him, was
wiped out defending a little village.
147
00:08:28,543 --> 00:08:32,410
They were buried there, and he wanted
to go back and be buried with them.
148
00:08:32,412 --> 00:08:34,913
That's sweet. Oh, okay.
149
00:08:34,915 --> 00:08:40,551
So Mickey has to go over and accompany
the body and see that it gets buried.
150
00:08:40,553 --> 00:08:42,986
Well, why, if he was
such a bad guy?
151
00:08:42,988 --> 00:08:46,356
Whatever his father had
done to him or his family,
152
00:08:46,358 --> 00:08:50,059
Mickey wanted it to end
with his conscience clear.
153
00:08:50,061 --> 00:08:51,794
That's Mickey.
154
00:08:51,796 --> 00:08:54,897
Then there was
this little problem.
155
00:08:54,899 --> 00:08:57,065
You lost my father?
156
00:08:57,067 --> 00:08:58,266
Oui.
157
00:08:58,268 --> 00:09:00,067
We're not talking
about a val-pac here.
158
00:09:00,069 --> 00:09:04,905
We're talking about a former person
in a bad suit in a big wooden box.
159
00:09:04,907 --> 00:09:08,775
- And all you can say to me is "oui"?
- Oui.
160
00:09:08,777 --> 00:09:13,412
Mickey's going out of his mind, but
he's trying not to go off on anyone.
161
00:09:13,414 --> 00:09:15,514
This is a guy
who argues for a living.
162
00:09:15,516 --> 00:09:17,482
He tells Shaquille O'Neal
to shut up.
163
00:09:17,484 --> 00:09:21,085
But he doesn't want to be the ugly American.
Can I see your superior?
164
00:09:21,087 --> 00:09:27,157
Please, look, I know that you people
are still angry over eurodisney.
165
00:09:27,159 --> 00:09:29,759
But please don't
take it out on me.
166
00:09:29,761 --> 00:09:35,163
Okay, okay. Whatever you do, I
am not gonna lose my temper.
167
00:09:35,165 --> 00:09:37,031
But finally...
168
00:09:37,033 --> 00:09:39,233
if I was Hitler,
you'd give me my father!
169
00:09:39,235 --> 00:09:45,305
You'd give me everything in your whole
goddamned country! Where is my father?
170
00:09:45,974 --> 00:09:47,974
Two days.
171
00:09:47,976 --> 00:09:49,442
Two days?
172
00:09:49,444 --> 00:09:53,311
He was in that
airport two days.
173
00:09:55,815 --> 00:10:00,950
Monsieur Gordon, will you
come with me, please? Oui!
174
00:10:00,952 --> 00:10:06,255
But the airline was nice.
They gave him free almonds.
175
00:10:13,196 --> 00:10:15,963
Where does Ellen come in?
176
00:10:15,965 --> 00:10:18,799
Now.
177
00:10:23,638 --> 00:10:26,138
Bon. Merci infinimentpour votre aide.
178
00:10:26,140 --> 00:10:28,073
Je vous en prie. Au revoir.
179
00:10:28,075 --> 00:10:30,108
De rien. Au revoir. Au revoir.
180
00:10:30,110 --> 00:10:33,311
Bon chance. Au revoir.
Et vous aussi.
181
00:10:33,313 --> 00:10:36,013
Mr. Gordon, I'm miss Andrews.
182
00:10:36,015 --> 00:10:38,782
Would you care to come
into my office?
183
00:10:38,784 --> 00:10:42,718
Veronique, pas de telephone.
Oui, madame.
184
00:10:42,720 --> 00:10:44,586
Merci.
185
00:10:44,588 --> 00:10:47,288
Please, have a seat.
186
00:10:48,057 --> 00:10:49,689
How are you feeling today,
Mr. Gordon?
187
00:10:49,691 --> 00:10:53,758
How am I today?
I am a mass of good will.
188
00:10:53,760 --> 00:10:55,326
You're American. Yes.
189
00:10:55,328 --> 00:10:58,862
On behalf of the airline, I would
like to apologize for any problem...
190
00:10:58,864 --> 00:11:00,763
problem? There's no problem.
191
00:11:00,765 --> 00:11:05,367
You lost my father; My rear end has
become molded to a plastic chair;
192
00:11:05,369 --> 00:11:07,836
And I've got amazing gas
from eating those almonds.
193
00:11:07,838 --> 00:11:10,038
I've never been happier in my life.
I'm a walking mardi gras.
194
00:11:10,040 --> 00:11:16,177
That's very funny, really. You have a
delightfully sharp way of expressing yourself.
195
00:11:16,179 --> 00:11:20,747
A terrible thing has been done
to you, and we are very sorry.
196
00:11:20,749 --> 00:11:23,416
You have every right
to insult, belittle...
197
00:11:23,418 --> 00:11:25,651
And abuse the staff
who have tried to help you.
198
00:11:25,653 --> 00:11:30,688
In fact, we thank you, and we voted
you "traveler of the month."
199
00:11:30,690 --> 00:11:32,523
So, congratulations.
200
00:11:32,525 --> 00:11:37,961
- Is there anything else you'd like to say?
- No, I think that's it.
201
00:11:37,963 --> 00:11:40,396
Good. We found your father.
202
00:11:40,398 --> 00:11:43,832
The coffin landed here, but,
evidently, it was mis-tagged.
203
00:11:43,834 --> 00:11:46,668
See? You should always tip more at the curb.
Oh, definitely.
204
00:11:46,670 --> 00:11:49,804
Then it accidentally was sent
to Switzerland. Switzerland?
205
00:11:49,806 --> 00:11:52,106
We had some trouble dealing with them.
They're vicious.
206
00:11:52,108 --> 00:11:56,043
They punched holes in my cheese.
I thought they were neutral.
207
00:11:56,045 --> 00:12:00,580
They insisted on holding your father
in quarantine for health reasons.
208
00:12:00,582 --> 00:12:05,150
He's dead! He has no health.
He's been de-healthed.
209
00:12:13,192 --> 00:12:17,026
Hey, there he is. Okay?
Let's get out of here.
210
00:12:17,028 --> 00:12:19,061
Oh.
211
00:12:19,830 --> 00:12:22,597
Do you have the claim checks?
Why?
212
00:12:22,599 --> 00:12:25,600
Are there two of these here
that look exactly alike?
213
00:12:25,602 --> 00:12:29,403
My coffin has red yarn
on the handle.
214
00:12:29,405 --> 00:12:31,338
Hey, what are you doing?
215
00:12:31,340 --> 00:12:33,373
We have to make sure
that this is your father.
216
00:12:33,375 --> 00:12:37,976
If it's an angry little guy giving you the
finger, it's him. Don't make me look at him.
217
00:12:37,978 --> 00:12:42,813
I'm sorry, but with all the confusion,
I really need you to identify him.
218
00:12:42,815 --> 00:12:48,951
Then put him on his stomach, because
I'm used to seeing him walk away.
219
00:12:48,953 --> 00:12:51,219
Right.
220
00:12:51,221 --> 00:12:54,155
- Okay?
- Okay.
221
00:12:54,157 --> 00:12:58,559
It's enough. It'll be fine.
Come on.
222
00:13:02,197 --> 00:13:05,565
¶¶
223
00:13:09,469 --> 00:13:11,502
Waiter? Pardon, monsieur.
224
00:13:11,504 --> 00:13:14,671
Garcon! Ooh, that looks good.
225
00:13:16,074 --> 00:13:17,540
Hi.
226
00:13:17,542 --> 00:13:21,276
Are you alone? Alone? I
don't even have silverware.
227
00:13:21,278 --> 00:13:23,978
Sit down. Thanks.
228
00:13:23,980 --> 00:13:26,780
What exactly is that?
229
00:13:26,782 --> 00:13:28,314
This? I don't know.
230
00:13:28,316 --> 00:13:32,951
I thought I'd ordered a Martini, but
apparently I ordered a backyard.
231
00:13:32,953 --> 00:13:35,453
Are you hungry? Can I order
you the wrong thing?
232
00:13:35,455 --> 00:13:38,489
Oh, no, thank you. I'm on
my way out for the evening.
233
00:13:38,491 --> 00:13:40,624
Yeah, I noticed. Auto show?
234
00:13:40,626 --> 00:13:43,793
No, actually, I'm going
to the opera. Oh.
235
00:13:43,795 --> 00:13:47,896
Don't leave
until the fat lady sings.
236
00:13:48,398 --> 00:13:50,197
Oh, I never do.
237
00:13:50,199 --> 00:13:53,200
Waiter, please. This is ri...
238
00:13:53,202 --> 00:13:56,469
Oh, it's a loaner.
239
00:13:56,471 --> 00:13:58,304
I didn't have a jacket.
Right. I guessed.
240
00:13:58,306 --> 00:14:02,674
But it's a good look for me, don't you think?
The Ellis island collection.
241
00:14:02,676 --> 00:14:04,942
Yeah, it's you.
242
00:14:04,944 --> 00:14:08,245
And I don't even know you.
243
00:14:08,247 --> 00:14:10,013
Anyway, I really have to go,
244
00:14:10,015 --> 00:14:13,349
but I wanted to drop by to tell you
that everything is taken care of.
245
00:14:13,351 --> 00:14:15,384
We'll deliver the casket
to the cemetery.
246
00:14:15,386 --> 00:14:18,754
A car will pick you up at 8:00 and
bring you back to the airport.
247
00:14:18,756 --> 00:14:22,757
For your return flight, we've
upgraded you to first class.
248
00:14:22,759 --> 00:14:24,525
And the ticket is free
both ways.
249
00:14:24,527 --> 00:14:27,594
And that's supposed to make
up for losing my father?
250
00:14:27,596 --> 00:14:32,732
We're also picking up
your hotel bill. Yes!
251
00:14:33,634 --> 00:14:37,168
Well, I'll leave you
in your grief.
252
00:14:37,170 --> 00:14:40,771
Will anybody else be needing
transportation to the cemetery?
253
00:14:40,773 --> 00:14:43,874
No. I will be
the only one there.
254
00:14:43,876 --> 00:14:45,408
Oh, how sad.
255
00:14:45,410 --> 00:14:47,910
Good, 'cause it's a funeral.
256
00:14:47,912 --> 00:14:50,112
Right.
257
00:14:50,114 --> 00:14:52,847
Okay. Bye-bye. Bye.
258
00:14:53,783 --> 00:14:56,449
Um, miss Andrews?
259
00:14:59,153 --> 00:15:00,919
I just wanted to thank you,
you know,
260
00:15:00,921 --> 00:15:06,223
not just for the plane and the
car, but for today with my father.
261
00:15:06,225 --> 00:15:08,258
You were really understanding.
262
00:15:08,260 --> 00:15:10,727
Well, it was the least
I could do.
263
00:15:10,729 --> 00:15:12,662
Well, good-bye, Mr. Gordon. Bye.
264
00:15:12,664 --> 00:15:15,965
Oh, it's in there somewhere.
There you go. Here.
265
00:15:15,967 --> 00:15:18,600
All right. Bye.
266
00:15:38,152 --> 00:15:40,819
This is my father.
267
00:15:41,121 --> 00:15:43,421
He fought in the war here.
268
00:15:46,893 --> 00:15:49,626
These were his buddies.
269
00:15:50,962 --> 00:15:53,495
Amis.
270
00:15:59,569 --> 00:16:02,236
Well, you're here.
271
00:16:02,771 --> 00:16:06,506
I brought you here
like you wanted.
272
00:16:20,085 --> 00:16:24,620
Thanks for not getting
killed so I could be born.
273
00:16:34,063 --> 00:16:36,530
Okay.
274
00:16:41,970 --> 00:16:44,670
That was very sweet.
275
00:16:45,339 --> 00:16:46,938
What are you doing here?
276
00:16:46,940 --> 00:16:50,975
Nobody should bury
their father alone.
277
00:16:53,312 --> 00:16:56,645
- I'm Mickey.
- Ellen.
278
00:16:59,049 --> 00:17:02,116
Do you come here often?
279
00:17:15,664 --> 00:17:17,830
You would've been more
comfortable in the limousine.
280
00:17:17,832 --> 00:17:22,567
No, I'm much more
comfortable here.
281
00:17:22,902 --> 00:17:27,337
So I take it you and your
father weren't very close. No.
282
00:17:27,339 --> 00:17:28,771
He left when I was ten.
283
00:17:28,773 --> 00:17:31,707
But I'll never forget the
last thing he said to me:
284
00:17:31,709 --> 00:17:35,510
"Get out of my way!" You can't
buy memories like that.
285
00:17:35,512 --> 00:17:37,378
I suppose not.
286
00:17:37,380 --> 00:17:39,613
Anyway, I'll have you to the
airport in an hour and a half.
287
00:17:39,615 --> 00:17:44,350
The drive's a breeze. Oh! See, I
would never say something like that.
288
00:17:44,352 --> 00:17:45,951
Like what?
Like "it's a breeze."
289
00:17:45,953 --> 00:17:49,254
I'm real superstitious and that's
like begging for disaster.
290
00:17:49,256 --> 00:17:54,091
Like those old war movies, where after the
battle they're talking about going home,
291
00:17:54,093 --> 00:17:56,026
and there's some guy
named Brooklyn...
292
00:17:56,028 --> 00:17:59,429
"when I get back home, I'm gonna see
my Dodgers play in ebbets field.
293
00:17:59,431 --> 00:18:05,268
Gonna get me a nice hot dog
and then I'm gonna..."
294
00:18:05,837 --> 00:18:07,603
I mean, it always
happened, right?
295
00:18:07,605 --> 00:18:11,173
If ever I get on a small plane and
there's a storm outside, I never say:
296
00:18:11,175 --> 00:18:13,708
"Piece of cake.
We'll be there in an hour."
297
00:18:13,710 --> 00:18:16,877
Never say famous last words
because they could be.
298
00:18:16,879 --> 00:18:20,680
You're a disturbed person,
aren't you?
299
00:18:20,682 --> 00:18:22,648
You have no idea.
300
00:18:22,650 --> 00:18:27,486
According to Mickey, he was really
working hard all the way back to Paris.
301
00:18:27,488 --> 00:18:29,721
You know those Japanese
science fiction movies?
302
00:18:29,723 --> 00:18:34,424
Big dinosaurs on the streets and those people
run out, they just wait to get stepped on.
303
00:18:34,426 --> 00:18:37,126
They run out...
304
00:18:37,595 --> 00:18:42,864
- Then they just wait. -
- He's got the charm turned up to warp factor 7.
305
00:18:42,866 --> 00:18:47,267
And she seems to like him,
but he's not sure.
306
00:18:47,269 --> 00:18:49,802
Well, I just never knew that
about wilt Chamberlain.
307
00:18:49,804 --> 00:18:54,105
Well, they say it's true, but, you
know... well, I-I had a great time.
308
00:18:54,107 --> 00:18:58,141
Thank you for everything. We've
gotta stop meeting like this.
309
00:18:58,143 --> 00:19:00,276
Bye.
310
00:19:00,278 --> 00:19:02,811
Au revoir.
311
00:19:03,380 --> 00:19:06,214
Take care of yourself.
312
00:19:06,216 --> 00:19:07,782
Okay.
313
00:19:07,784 --> 00:19:10,383
Have a good flight.
314
00:19:12,420 --> 00:19:13,952
Can I ask you a question? Sure.
315
00:19:13,954 --> 00:19:15,853
Does this ticket have to be
for this afternoon?
316
00:19:15,855 --> 00:19:20,056
That was prepared for anytime you want to use it.
Did you want to change it?
317
00:19:20,058 --> 00:19:22,091
Well, I was just thinking,
it's so silly.
318
00:19:22,093 --> 00:19:25,794
I-I've never been to Paris, and
maybe I should do some sightseeing.
319
00:19:25,796 --> 00:19:30,798
Sightseeing? In Paris?
What a bizarre notion.
320
00:19:30,800 --> 00:19:32,199
W-what do you got here?
321
00:19:32,201 --> 00:19:35,402
What have we got here? Yeah.
You got anything?
322
00:19:35,404 --> 00:19:39,839
We got some stuff. Yeah?
Like what kind of stuff?
323
00:19:39,841 --> 00:19:45,110
Would you like to see the eiffel tower?
That's here?
324
00:19:46,813 --> 00:19:51,014
See? You got any other stuff?
325
00:19:57,454 --> 00:19:59,120
C'est bon.
326
00:19:59,122 --> 00:20:02,289
He keeps delaying his flight;
He starts buying outfits.
327
00:20:02,291 --> 00:20:03,957
He doesn't wanna leave.
328
00:20:03,959 --> 00:20:06,826
I find it a lot like New York,
329
00:20:06,828 --> 00:20:09,862
but really, totally different.
330
00:20:13,934 --> 00:20:16,534
Did you always
wanna be a referee?
331
00:20:16,536 --> 00:20:20,004
No, I started out as a player.
Oh.
332
00:20:20,006 --> 00:20:21,972
What are you looking at?
No, I just...
333
00:20:21,974 --> 00:20:24,074
what, that I'mvertically challenged?
334
00:20:24,076 --> 00:20:26,676
The best place for me
to ref a game...
335
00:20:26,678 --> 00:20:28,444
Is Madison square garden
in New York.
336
00:20:28,446 --> 00:20:31,647
Wasn't it a soccer game a few years
back where the referee got killed?
337
00:20:31,649 --> 00:20:36,051
Yeah, see, I'm against that. Good for you.
Take a stand.
338
00:20:36,053 --> 00:20:39,054
Do you ever get back
to the new world?
339
00:20:39,056 --> 00:20:41,156
Every year I visit
my father in Wichita.
340
00:20:41,158 --> 00:20:44,325
I bet his name is red and he
caps oil well fires, right?
341
00:20:44,327 --> 00:20:48,629
No, his name is Arthur and he owned a pet store.
That was my next guess.
342
00:20:48,631 --> 00:20:52,432
When you dream, do you dream
in French or English? French.
343
00:20:52,434 --> 00:20:54,500
With English subtitles.
I'm very impressed;
344
00:20:54,502 --> 00:20:59,204
You got kids over here, 2, 3 years old,
and they're already speaking French.
345
00:20:59,206 --> 00:21:02,340
Rodin never said
what he was thinking.
346
00:21:02,342 --> 00:21:04,075
I think he's thinking,
347
00:21:04,077 --> 00:21:08,779
"goddamn, rodin, three
drinks and I'm nude!"
348
00:21:12,217 --> 00:21:16,452
What can you say? It was Paris.
349
00:21:22,226 --> 00:21:24,359
You got great stuff.
350
00:21:37,006 --> 00:21:38,672
Got it!
351
00:21:38,674 --> 00:21:40,540
Hey, do you know where we are?
352
00:21:40,542 --> 00:21:44,576
Yeah, we're on the seine at the pont-neuf.
No, no, no.
353
00:21:44,578 --> 00:21:46,377
This bridge
is in a great movie.
354
00:21:46,379 --> 00:21:49,346
Don't you recognize it?
Give me a hint.
355
00:21:49,348 --> 00:21:52,682
¶ It's very clear ¶
356
00:21:52,684 --> 00:21:55,483
patton.
357
00:21:56,385 --> 00:21:58,017
Patton? Yeah!
358
00:21:58,019 --> 00:22:01,587
¶ It's very clear
our love is here to stay ¶
359
00:22:01,589 --> 00:22:04,122
an American in Paris?
Gene Kelly, Leslie caron.
360
00:22:04,124 --> 00:22:07,658
This is the bridge! This
is very exciting for me!
361
00:22:07,660 --> 00:22:09,793
Well, come on, sing the rest.
362
00:22:09,795 --> 00:22:11,694
Sing? No, I c... I can't. No.
363
00:22:11,696 --> 00:22:16,765
With my voice the cops will
come with those sirens...
364
00:22:16,767 --> 00:22:20,835
They'll put me in singing jail.
365
00:22:27,509 --> 00:22:29,542
¶ It's ¶
366
00:22:29,544 --> 00:22:33,245
¶ very clear ¶
367
00:22:33,247 --> 00:22:38,549
¶ our love is here to stay ¶
368
00:22:38,817 --> 00:22:41,217
¶ not for a year ¶
369
00:22:41,219 --> 00:22:46,354
¶ but forever and a day ¶¶
370
00:22:47,523 --> 00:22:51,658
¶ in time
the rockies may crumble ¶
371
00:22:51,660 --> 00:22:57,096
¶ Gibraltar may tumble ¶ now you're
going to tell me you're leaving, right?
372
00:22:57,098 --> 00:22:59,865
¶ They're only made of Clay ¶
373
00:22:59,867 --> 00:23:03,802
the season starts Monday,
and I have to get back.
374
00:23:03,804 --> 00:23:05,770
¶ But ¶ mmm. Mm-hmm.
375
00:23:05,772 --> 00:23:09,673
¶ Our love is here ¶ would you like the
afternoon or the evening flight back?
376
00:23:09,675 --> 00:23:14,077
¶ To stay ¶ evening. Then we
could spend the day together.
377
00:23:14,079 --> 00:23:17,146
I'll have to work.
I'll watch you.
378
00:23:17,148 --> 00:23:20,181
What? Yeah.
379
00:23:21,417 --> 00:23:25,285
This is my place. Oh, yeah?
Oh, it's great.
380
00:23:25,287 --> 00:23:30,323
I had a great time today. Thanks.
I had a wonderful time.
381
00:23:30,692 --> 00:23:33,892
So, good night. Good night.
382
00:23:34,895 --> 00:23:37,862
Would you like
to come upstairs?
383
00:23:37,864 --> 00:23:40,297
¶ In time ¶ really?
384
00:23:40,299 --> 00:23:42,866
¶ The rockies may crumble ¶
yes.
385
00:23:42,868 --> 00:23:44,934
¶ Gibraltar may tumble ¶
386
00:23:44,936 --> 00:23:47,136
no. I'm sorry.
387
00:23:47,138 --> 00:23:52,306
¶ They're only made of Clay ¶ to tell you the
truth, I don't find you very attractive.
388
00:23:52,308 --> 00:23:55,909
You've got a big, fat,
dumpy ass.
389
00:23:55,911 --> 00:23:57,810
What? He said that?
390
00:23:57,812 --> 00:24:03,248
No, I just threw that in to see if you
were paying attention; What he said was:
391
00:24:03,250 --> 00:24:05,250
I would love to.
392
00:24:05,252 --> 00:24:07,452
¶ Our love ¶ come on.
393
00:24:07,454 --> 00:24:10,054
¶ Is here ¶
394
00:24:10,056 --> 00:24:12,056
¶ to ¶ And they...
395
00:24:12,058 --> 00:24:13,924
Yeah. ¶ Stay ¶¶
396
00:24:13,926 --> 00:24:15,825
- And it was...
- Oh, yeah.
397
00:24:15,827 --> 00:24:20,362
And you know, it was the first time
Mickey never told me anything,
398
00:24:20,364 --> 00:24:24,799
which meant it was
really something special.
399
00:24:24,801 --> 00:24:29,937
¶ I know ¶
400
00:24:29,939 --> 00:24:36,109
¶ we may never meet again ¶
401
00:24:38,947 --> 00:24:43,882
¶ before you go ¶
402
00:24:43,884 --> 00:24:51,088
¶ make this moment
sweet again ¶
403
00:24:53,158 --> 00:24:59,429
¶ we won't say good night ¶
404
00:25:00,465 --> 00:25:02,998
¶ until the last minute ¶¶
405
00:25:03,000 --> 00:25:06,801
¶¶ And finally
Mickey has to leave.
406
00:25:06,803 --> 00:25:09,103
He left? He actually left?
407
00:25:09,105 --> 00:25:13,740
He had to.
The season was starting.
408
00:25:13,742 --> 00:25:18,678
Poor Mickey. He hadn't had a lot
of beautiful moments in his life.
409
00:25:18,680 --> 00:25:21,614
He grew up in a family where
the dog committed suicide.
410
00:25:21,616 --> 00:25:25,651
He left a note: "I just can't
take it anymore... chi-chi."
411
00:25:25,653 --> 00:25:30,555
Mickey just never knew that
anyone could be so wonderful.
412
00:25:30,557 --> 00:25:32,456
¶¶
413
00:25:32,458 --> 00:25:34,357
But he tells himself,
414
00:25:34,359 --> 00:25:37,693
forget Paris; It was just a
beautiful few days. Let it go.
415
00:25:37,695 --> 00:25:42,997
You know, just let it be
a perfect little memory.
416
00:25:42,999 --> 00:25:45,632
But it's tough.
417
00:25:47,502 --> 00:25:51,369
¶¶
418
00:25:52,572 --> 00:25:54,071
Did you see this?
419
00:25:54,073 --> 00:25:58,074
They brought Abraham Lincoln back
to life for a few seconds. When?
420
00:25:58,076 --> 00:26:01,677
Um, last week they dug him up...
Hmm.
421
00:26:01,679 --> 00:26:06,248
And they gave him this drug revivatol.
No kidding.
422
00:26:06,250 --> 00:26:08,650
It says he said a few words.
423
00:26:08,652 --> 00:26:12,353
What'd he say?
"How'd the play end?"
424
00:26:12,355 --> 00:26:15,522
How you gonna ref a game
with that in your stomach?
425
00:26:15,524 --> 00:26:19,792
- Jack, you may look like my mother, but you're not.
- Ooh.
426
00:26:19,794 --> 00:26:22,761
So, what are we gonna see today, gentlemen?
What's playin'?
427
00:26:22,763 --> 00:26:27,264
Do we have to go to the movies?
I mean, that's all we ever do.
428
00:26:27,266 --> 00:26:30,267
- So what do you wanna do?
- I don't know.
429
00:26:30,269 --> 00:26:32,969
I was thinkin' maybe
we'd go to a... museum.
430
00:26:32,971 --> 00:26:37,706
¶ It's like lookin' for
a four-leaf clover ¶
431
00:26:37,708 --> 00:26:38,940
and see what?
432
00:26:38,942 --> 00:26:43,411
¶ It takes a little help
from up above ¶ art.
433
00:26:44,414 --> 00:26:45,846
Art. ¶ Lucky me ¶¶
434
00:26:45,848 --> 00:26:49,583
Tommy, would you like to
go to the museum and see art?
435
00:26:49,585 --> 00:26:51,685
Not today, thank you.
What is with you?
436
00:26:51,687 --> 00:26:55,388
We're in Indianapolis, and all
of a sudden you wanna see art.
437
00:26:55,390 --> 00:26:58,391
When I was in Paris,
I saw art, okay?
438
00:26:58,393 --> 00:27:00,693
I saw the Mona Lisa;
I saw stuff.
439
00:27:00,695 --> 00:27:02,828
With that girl you met, huh?
Ellen. Yes.
440
00:27:02,830 --> 00:27:07,198
What is she living in Paris for?
Is she too good to live here?
441
00:27:07,200 --> 00:27:09,533
Good point. "Good point"?
There's no point!
442
00:27:09,535 --> 00:27:13,570
Why don't you shoot some
revivatol into your brains?
443
00:27:13,572 --> 00:27:16,272
I am going to the museum,
and I'm gonna go see art.
444
00:27:16,274 --> 00:27:21,844
- You'd better leave now to avoid the crowds.
- Give my regards to Picasso.
445
00:27:22,646 --> 00:27:24,078
Bad call, Mickey!
446
00:27:24,080 --> 00:27:28,448
- Damn.
- Patrick, stop lookin' at me that way, you big baby.
447
00:27:28,450 --> 00:27:33,485
Just play the game, okay?How are you?
448
00:27:37,324 --> 00:27:40,058
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Walking. Walking.
449
00:27:40,060 --> 00:27:42,826
Right there. Right there.
450
00:27:44,196 --> 00:27:46,262
They're climbing
up and down my back!
451
00:27:46,264 --> 00:27:48,030
You're makin'
five million a year.
452
00:27:48,032 --> 00:27:51,233
You could be in a submarine bumpin'
into a periscope. Just play ball.
453
00:27:51,235 --> 00:27:53,768
You gotta call 'em.
Stop the whining, okay?
454
00:27:53,770 --> 00:27:55,469
1-5 in a block! Huh!
455
00:27:55,471 --> 00:27:58,538
What, are you new in town?
Make some calls, Mickey, huh?
456
00:27:58,540 --> 00:28:01,207
I'll make the calls. I'm
gettin' a glare off your head.
457
00:28:01,209 --> 00:28:07,179
No, no, no, no, no!
On the line, on the line!
458
00:28:10,350 --> 00:28:12,049
What, are you tired?
459
00:28:12,051 --> 00:28:17,721
Yeah, your girlfriend wore me out last night.
Don't have any legs.
460
00:28:33,904 --> 00:28:36,170
Hi.
461
00:28:36,639 --> 00:28:39,439
It was a tango!
You did the tango!
462
00:28:39,441 --> 00:28:41,407
That was a bad call.
I was there...
463
00:28:41,409 --> 00:28:42,875
you weren't there. I was there.
464
00:28:42,877 --> 00:28:45,644
Hey, Mick, where'd you buy
your clothes from? Why?
465
00:28:45,646 --> 00:28:48,780
'Cause we're lookin' to have a
kid; We wanna know where to shop.
466
00:28:48,782 --> 00:28:53,250
Very funny. Tell spike that one.
Come on, play ball.
467
00:28:53,252 --> 00:28:56,119
Technical foul!
468
00:28:56,121 --> 00:28:59,422
Get up to the foul line.
Go to the foul line.
469
00:28:59,424 --> 00:29:02,892
Give 'im a technical!
What are you doin' here?
470
00:29:02,894 --> 00:29:05,561
That's a hard foul, Reggie!
471
00:29:05,563 --> 00:29:06,862
Thanks, spud.
472
00:29:06,864 --> 00:29:09,798
You know somethin'? You're
the only one I can talk to.
473
00:29:09,800 --> 00:29:12,801
Open it up. One, two, three!
What about Ellen?
474
00:29:12,803 --> 00:29:15,270
Did they ever call each other?
Did they write? Ohh!
475
00:29:15,272 --> 00:29:20,641
She writes, he calls, but it's no good;
He misses her. I love it. I miss you.
476
00:29:20,776 --> 00:29:23,409
Then Thanksgiving.
Big network game.
477
00:29:23,411 --> 00:29:25,811
Lakers at Detroit. Go, pistons!
478
00:29:25,813 --> 00:29:28,146
It was kareem Abdul jabbar's
last season, his farewell tour.
479
00:29:28,148 --> 00:29:32,383
They made a celebration for him in every town
the Lakers played; This time it was Detroit.
480
00:29:32,385 --> 00:29:37,187
Thank you so much. It was a big game;
The biggest rivalry in the league.
481
00:29:37,189 --> 00:29:38,855
They were scalping tickets
for $600.
482
00:29:38,857 --> 00:29:43,192
And of course Mickey's crew does
the game because he's the best.
483
00:29:43,194 --> 00:29:44,626
Only it's a holiday.
484
00:29:44,628 --> 00:29:48,796
He's thousands of Miles
from her, and he's miserable.
485
00:29:48,798 --> 00:29:51,331
He's a time bomb.
486
00:29:51,333 --> 00:29:53,166
Wake up and drop dead,
you putz!
487
00:29:53,168 --> 00:29:58,604
- God, I hate your guts!
- Where did you go to ref school, dipshit tech?
488
00:29:58,606 --> 00:30:00,472
You pathetic pigs.
489
00:30:00,474 --> 00:30:02,040
That's a foul!
490
00:30:02,042 --> 00:30:05,309
What's the matter,
the Prozac didn't kick in?
491
00:30:05,311 --> 00:30:09,545
Get in the game, you prick!
492
00:30:11,715 --> 00:30:15,049
What a waste of blood.
493
00:30:15,051 --> 00:30:16,683
You suck!
494
00:30:16,685 --> 00:30:20,686
¶¶ Hey, Mickey, how'd you
miss that last call?
495
00:30:20,688 --> 00:30:22,854
Here, you wanna borrow these?
496
00:30:22,856 --> 00:30:25,957
¶¶
497
00:30:28,594 --> 00:30:30,994
Let's go, let's play!
498
00:30:30,996 --> 00:30:34,030
Hey, Mickey, laimbeer's got me
in a head lock out there.
499
00:30:34,032 --> 00:30:37,166
What are you waiting for,
blood?
500
00:30:37,168 --> 00:30:39,067
Technical foul! For what?
501
00:30:39,069 --> 00:30:41,035
"For what"?
You want another one?
502
00:30:41,037 --> 00:30:44,104
What did I say? Just because you're havin'
a bad game, don't take it out on me!
503
00:30:44,106 --> 00:30:48,208
- You're outta here, kareem!
- Are you nuts? This is my farewell game!
504
00:30:48,210 --> 00:30:52,979
- Good! Well, let me be the first to say "farewell."
- No, no, no, no!
505
00:30:52,981 --> 00:30:55,581
You're nuts, man! Really?
What are you laughin' at?
506
00:30:55,583 --> 00:30:59,184
- Nothin'.
- No? That's it! Technical! For lying!
507
00:30:59,186 --> 00:31:01,553
- Are you crazy?
- Am I crazy?
508
00:31:01,555 --> 00:31:03,121
You're outta here too!
509
00:31:03,123 --> 00:31:06,424
You're throwin' me out of the game?
Take a walk, Isaiah!
510
00:31:06,426 --> 00:31:10,727
What the hell's goin' on? You don't run this league!
Nobody paid to see you ref!
511
00:31:10,729 --> 00:31:14,630
Nobody paid to see you do anything!
Get outta here, laimbeer!
512
00:31:14,632 --> 00:31:17,199
This is not over!
I'm gonna see you again!
513
00:31:17,201 --> 00:31:18,733
Good, because
I'll still have this!
514
00:31:18,735 --> 00:31:21,202
- Big deal!
- You're outta the game!
515
00:31:21,204 --> 00:31:22,770
You're terrible!
Get off the court!
516
00:31:22,772 --> 00:31:25,005
- It was horrible.
- He snapped.
517
00:31:25,007 --> 00:31:27,941
You're out! You're out! He
threw out both starting teams,
518
00:31:27,943 --> 00:31:30,209
a coach, a trainer,
kareem's parents...
519
00:31:30,211 --> 00:31:32,110
And the guy who puts cheese
on the nachos.
520
00:31:32,112 --> 00:31:37,247
They had to take Mickey out
in an armored van.
521
00:31:37,616 --> 00:31:40,049
He had committed the
cardinal sin of refereeing:
522
00:31:40,051 --> 00:31:44,653
- He brought his personal life onto the court.
- I can't believe it.
523
00:31:44,655 --> 00:31:47,522
The league suspended him
for a week.
524
00:31:47,524 --> 00:31:52,359
He was in bad shape.
525
00:31:52,794 --> 00:31:56,761
So what did he do?
526
00:31:59,098 --> 00:32:01,865
What are you doing here?
527
00:32:01,867 --> 00:32:05,634
What is with this airline?
Now they lost my mother.
528
00:32:05,636 --> 00:32:09,704
Get over here.
529
00:32:14,910 --> 00:32:19,311
I have five brothers. All older.
A little princess.
530
00:32:19,313 --> 00:32:21,212
Yeah. Yeah.
531
00:32:21,214 --> 00:32:24,682
They were all high school wrestling
champions, so they had the wrestling ears.
532
00:32:24,684 --> 00:32:28,818
I just remember, "no potatoes, mom.
I gotta make weight."
533
00:32:30,288 --> 00:32:33,789
After the match it would be, "he pinned me!
How did he pin me?"
534
00:32:33,791 --> 00:32:38,559
So it was necessary for me to live
in a completely different world.
535
00:32:38,561 --> 00:32:40,627
But why France? Why here?
536
00:32:40,629 --> 00:32:45,298
You know the Madeleine books, where the little
French girl goes off to boarding school?
537
00:32:45,300 --> 00:32:50,635
Well, my mother bought me the
whole set when I was young,
538
00:32:50,637 --> 00:32:52,169
and...
539
00:32:52,171 --> 00:32:54,437
I think I was Madeleine.
540
00:32:54,439 --> 00:32:56,873
She made me the hat
just like her.
541
00:32:56,875 --> 00:33:00,409
I used to walk around Wichita talking
with a little French accent.
542
00:33:00,411 --> 00:33:04,379
Everybody thought I was crazy,
but I ended up here, so...
543
00:33:04,381 --> 00:33:05,880
are your folks still around?
544
00:33:05,882 --> 00:33:11,552
My dad is, but my mother died
when I was in high school.
545
00:33:12,388 --> 00:33:16,656
I wish she could've
seen me here.
546
00:33:20,828 --> 00:33:23,128
What?
547
00:33:24,030 --> 00:33:25,529
It's just your face.
548
00:33:25,531 --> 00:33:30,366
When you were telling me the story,
you just looked so beautiful.
549
00:33:30,368 --> 00:33:33,202
Stop.
550
00:33:52,087 --> 00:33:56,555
Hey, Ellen, let's sit down
for a little while, okay?
551
00:33:56,557 --> 00:33:59,090
All right.
552
00:34:03,062 --> 00:34:08,398
Ellen, I don't know if this is
just the right time for me,
553
00:34:08,400 --> 00:34:09,966
or how we met,
554
00:34:09,968 --> 00:34:14,102
or just how wonderful
you are, but...
555
00:34:15,004 --> 00:34:16,636
I really love you...
556
00:34:16,638 --> 00:34:20,105
And I want us to get married.
557
00:34:22,275 --> 00:34:23,907
Oh, Mickey, I am married.
558
00:34:23,909 --> 00:34:27,943
Wait, is this again to see
if I'm paying attention?
559
00:34:27,945 --> 00:34:30,512
No. This part was real.
560
00:34:30,514 --> 00:34:33,014
What?
561
00:34:34,350 --> 00:34:38,552
When, in the last
couple of months?
562
00:34:38,554 --> 00:34:41,888
No, no, no. Two years.
563
00:34:43,591 --> 00:34:45,123
Where is he?
564
00:34:45,125 --> 00:34:49,460
We're separated. I mean, we
might get back together, but...
565
00:34:49,462 --> 00:34:52,596
but you... you're here with me.
566
00:34:52,598 --> 00:34:54,798
I-I'm confused.
567
00:34:54,800 --> 00:34:56,599
You're confused? You're...
568
00:34:56,601 --> 00:34:59,602
all the time we're together, you never
said anything, you never implied...
569
00:34:59,604 --> 00:35:04,106
well, I'm not like you; I can't
tell everybody my whole life.
570
00:35:04,108 --> 00:35:08,809
Okay, but hit an occasional
highlight like, "I'm married."
571
00:35:11,780 --> 00:35:14,413
You don't do this
to a person, you know?
572
00:35:14,415 --> 00:35:17,949
You don't walk around being fabulous
when you know you're not available.
573
00:35:17,951 --> 00:35:20,985
- How do you think I feel?
- I don't have a clue!
574
00:35:20,987 --> 00:35:23,554
Let's recap, okay?
Here's what we know about you:
575
00:35:23,556 --> 00:35:26,890
You're from Wichita; You got
five brothers with bad ears;
576
00:35:26,892 --> 00:35:30,760
You're great in bed;
And, oh, yes, you're married!
577
00:35:30,762 --> 00:35:32,695
I'm overflowing with facts!
578
00:35:32,697 --> 00:35:38,299
Look, I have a good idea: Why don't you
just sit down and shut up for a second.
579
00:35:39,368 --> 00:35:40,900
I'm in trouble here.
580
00:35:40,902 --> 00:35:44,169
I'm trying to decide if I
should salvage a bad marriage.
581
00:35:44,171 --> 00:35:45,904
I've fallen in love
with someone else.
582
00:35:45,906 --> 00:35:49,641
I just think my problems are
a little bigger than yours,
583
00:35:49,643 --> 00:35:54,379
so let's have a holiday
from sarcasm, all right?
584
00:35:58,384 --> 00:36:00,984
You love me?
585
00:36:08,993 --> 00:36:11,393
Is he French?
586
00:36:11,395 --> 00:36:13,395
Yes.
587
00:36:13,397 --> 00:36:16,131
Is he handsome?
588
00:36:16,133 --> 00:36:18,299
Yes.
589
00:36:18,301 --> 00:36:20,668
Is he rich?
590
00:36:20,670 --> 00:36:23,303
Yes.
591
00:36:23,805 --> 00:36:25,838
Does he have a sister?
592
00:36:25,840 --> 00:36:28,273
Ohh!
593
00:36:28,275 --> 00:36:31,609
If you got him,
what do you need me for?
594
00:36:31,611 --> 00:36:33,510
He doesn't make me laugh.
595
00:36:33,512 --> 00:36:37,113
No? No. He makes me miserable.
596
00:36:37,115 --> 00:36:40,683
- Well, I can do that. Ellen, give me a chance.
- No.
597
00:36:40,685 --> 00:36:44,152
Ellen, please. I can't, Mickey.
598
00:36:45,722 --> 00:36:49,022
Ellen, where are you going?
599
00:36:49,024 --> 00:36:51,324
Ellen!
600
00:36:53,428 --> 00:36:55,694
So, what happened?
601
00:36:55,696 --> 00:36:57,762
- He came home again.
- Alone?
602
00:36:57,764 --> 00:37:02,165
Alone. Only this time, he's
determined not to eat his heart out.
603
00:37:02,167 --> 00:37:04,467
If she's not available,
she's not available, period.
604
00:37:04,469 --> 00:37:08,737
- He'll just go back to seeing the women he was seeing before.
- Who was he seeing?
605
00:37:08,739 --> 00:37:14,441
¶¶ Oh, Mickey was seeing a wide
variety of interesting women.
606
00:37:14,443 --> 00:37:17,877
¶¶
607
00:37:17,879 --> 00:37:20,846
So, Mickey, am I
going to see you tonight?
608
00:37:20,848 --> 00:37:24,449
- Mickey.
- You call me. - Tonight.
609
00:37:24,651 --> 00:37:27,485
It was a rich, full life.
610
00:37:27,487 --> 00:37:30,855
Then one night, Mickey's
in Charlotte, north Carolina.
611
00:37:30,857 --> 00:37:33,424
¶¶
612
00:37:33,426 --> 00:37:35,726
It's an off night,
so he's all alone.
613
00:37:35,728 --> 00:37:40,864
Just him and the guy coughing
in the next room.
614
00:37:40,866 --> 00:37:44,200
Hey! Attack of
the phlegm creature!
615
00:37:44,202 --> 00:37:48,903
You ever think about
going to a hospital?
616
00:37:51,874 --> 00:37:55,275
Come on, cough it up.
Spit it up already!
617
00:37:57,445 --> 00:38:01,346
Coming up next,
more women's bodybuilding.
618
00:38:01,348 --> 00:38:05,549
Too much of a good thing.
619
00:38:10,755 --> 00:38:12,321
He called her?
620
00:38:12,323 --> 00:38:15,757
No. He called me.
I was in bed...
621
00:38:15,759 --> 00:38:17,158
Hello. Uh, reading.
622
00:38:17,160 --> 00:38:19,226
Andy, how're ya doin'?
Mickey! Where are you?
623
00:38:19,228 --> 00:38:22,829
You know what? I don't know. I
have to check my itinerary.
624
00:38:22,831 --> 00:38:24,697
Yeah, I'm either
in Denver or Charlotte.
625
00:38:24,699 --> 00:38:27,633
Yeah, I got a room
next to doc holliday.
626
00:38:27,635 --> 00:38:32,069
- Mmm!
- Do you remember that fourth grade substitute teacher?
627
00:38:32,071 --> 00:38:34,438
Remember she crossed her legs
and we went nuts?
628
00:38:34,440 --> 00:38:38,841
Remember she had the garters, hooks and the whole thing?
We didn't know what it was.
629
00:38:38,843 --> 00:38:40,909
Uh, miss... pitter.
630
00:38:40,911 --> 00:38:43,945
Oooh, bam! You're right.
Miss pitter.
631
00:38:43,947 --> 00:38:45,913
How'd you remember that?
632
00:38:45,915 --> 00:38:49,917
Why, did you run into her? No, I was
planning on masturbating later,
633
00:38:49,919 --> 00:38:52,819
and I just wanted a name
to go with the picture.
634
00:38:52,821 --> 00:38:54,987
Mickey, are you all right?
635
00:38:54,989 --> 00:38:57,789
No. I-I...
636
00:38:57,791 --> 00:39:00,591
I'm really lonely,
I don't feel good and...
637
00:39:00,593 --> 00:39:04,328
well, um, could I call you
back in a few minutes?
638
00:39:04,330 --> 00:39:06,630
Could you hold on
just a second?
639
00:39:06,632 --> 00:39:11,800
I want to talk to you, but I got this professional
cougher here who wants to fight with me.
640
00:39:11,802 --> 00:39:14,302
Hold on just a second.
All right?
641
00:39:14,304 --> 00:39:18,138
Listen, you've been
keeping me up all night.
642
00:39:18,140 --> 00:39:20,640
I just want...
643
00:39:20,642 --> 00:39:24,243
what are you doing here?
644
00:39:26,780 --> 00:39:30,914
Do you sleep
with the window open?
645
00:39:32,684 --> 00:39:34,383
Uh... yeah.
646
00:39:34,385 --> 00:39:38,352
I don't like it.
You're gonna have to stop that.
647
00:39:38,354 --> 00:39:40,754
Okay.
648
00:39:40,756 --> 00:39:44,824
Do you squeeze the toothpaste
from the top or the bottom?
649
00:39:44,826 --> 00:39:46,592
Uh... top.
650
00:39:46,594 --> 00:39:50,095
Well, don't do that.
I hate that.
651
00:39:50,564 --> 00:39:52,163
If you ever use my car,
652
00:39:52,165 --> 00:39:56,767
you better put the mirror and
the seat back where I like it.
653
00:39:56,769 --> 00:39:59,836
Don't use my razor
to shave any part of you.
654
00:39:59,838 --> 00:40:01,637
If you ever start
to lose your hair,
655
00:40:01,639 --> 00:40:04,773
you'd better not grow that long
thing down from your sideburns...
656
00:40:04,775 --> 00:40:07,742
That you wrap around your
head, 'cause it's disgusting.
657
00:40:07,744 --> 00:40:13,581
Don't ever hand me food and say,
"taste this. See if it's bad."
658
00:40:13,583 --> 00:40:16,383
All right. Okay? Okay.
659
00:40:16,385 --> 00:40:20,420
Wanna talk about religion, politics,
whether you want kids or not?
660
00:40:20,422 --> 00:40:24,790
That crap'll all work itself out.
We've handled the big issues.
661
00:40:24,792 --> 00:40:29,127
All right, I'll marry you.
662
00:40:30,063 --> 00:40:33,297
I love you. I love you.
663
00:40:43,541 --> 00:40:46,509
- And that was it.
- You listened the whole time?
664
00:40:46,511 --> 00:40:49,111
Yeah. It was beautiful.
In a minute.
665
00:40:49,113 --> 00:40:51,713
Oh, honey, that was nice.
666
00:40:51,715 --> 00:40:53,981
That was a really nice story.
667
00:40:53,983 --> 00:40:56,283
It's so romantic
when she comes back.
668
00:40:56,285 --> 00:40:58,985
Hey, hi!
Liz, what's the matter?
669
00:40:58,987 --> 00:41:01,120
What happened? Nothing.
670
00:41:01,122 --> 00:41:04,256
Why does every woman
you're with end up crying?
671
00:41:04,258 --> 00:41:07,659
They don't. Will you sh... hi.
672
00:41:07,661 --> 00:41:09,060
No, no, no.
673
00:41:09,062 --> 00:41:12,096
Andy was just telling me
this really wonderful story.
674
00:41:12,098 --> 00:41:15,666
- Oh, was he?
- Hi, Craig. How are you, Lucy?
675
00:41:15,668 --> 00:41:18,335
- I'm hot.
- Welcome to Helen's. What can I get you?
676
00:41:18,337 --> 00:41:25,608
- You got a nice white wine?
- Sure. It's like me, bold but with a hint of whimsy.
677
00:41:25,610 --> 00:41:27,509
Fine. And for the lady?
678
00:41:27,511 --> 00:41:30,912
- Perrier with lime, no ice.
- Excellent choice.
679
00:41:30,914 --> 00:41:33,414
What story?
The Ellen-Mickey story.
680
00:41:33,416 --> 00:41:35,682
Which one? The
one: How they met,
681
00:41:35,684 --> 00:41:39,018
Oh! The dead father, her
showing up in north Carolina.
682
00:41:39,020 --> 00:41:44,757
- I just can't wait to meet them.
- Them? They're both coming?
683
00:41:44,759 --> 00:41:47,559
What do you mean?
684
00:41:47,561 --> 00:41:48,793
Nothing.
685
00:41:48,795 --> 00:41:53,330
I was just under the
impression they were... Yeah.
686
00:41:53,332 --> 00:41:55,031
What?
687
00:41:55,033 --> 00:41:56,966
After that wonderful story?
688
00:41:56,968 --> 00:41:59,935
Well, what happened?
They were so in love.
689
00:41:59,937 --> 00:42:01,937
They were. They were
wild for each other.
690
00:42:01,939 --> 00:42:07,942
She got divorced, they got married right
away and those first few months were...
691
00:42:07,944 --> 00:42:09,510
are you crazy? No.
692
00:42:09,512 --> 00:42:12,112
You're going to weigh your
food here at the table? Yes!
693
00:42:12,114 --> 00:42:14,914
It's for weight watchers. I want
to look good for their wedding.
694
00:42:14,916 --> 00:42:19,584
How is this bothering you?
I ju... I... I can't...
695
00:42:19,586 --> 00:42:23,720
You want me to tell it? No. No.
696
00:42:23,722 --> 00:42:28,190
As I was saying, the first
few months were fabulous,
697
00:42:28,192 --> 00:42:29,824
like a constant honeymoon.
698
00:42:29,826 --> 00:42:33,360
She had no job, basketball
season was almost over.
699
00:42:33,362 --> 00:42:37,230
She traveled all over the country
with him, saw every game,
700
00:42:37,232 --> 00:42:41,934
had a ball. Look how
much a lime weighs.
701
00:42:41,936 --> 00:42:46,338
So now the season ends,
and it's time for the hard part.
702
00:42:46,340 --> 00:42:48,540
The honeymoon's over
and the marriage begins.
703
00:42:48,542 --> 00:42:51,843
Mickey had moved to L.A.
a couple of years after we did.
704
00:42:51,845 --> 00:42:54,412
He and Ellen moved into
his place at the marina,
705
00:42:54,414 --> 00:42:57,615
and it's not exactly her
idea of a love nest. Okay.
706
00:42:57,617 --> 00:43:00,751
Open 'em!
707
00:43:00,753 --> 00:43:02,419
No. Wow.
708
00:43:02,421 --> 00:43:06,523
It was sort of a shrine to watching ESPN.
Welcome home.
709
00:43:06,525 --> 00:43:09,025
- It's just a matter of taste.
- Or a lack of.
710
00:43:09,027 --> 00:43:13,162
Anyway, then October comes. It's time
for Mickey to go back on the road.
711
00:43:13,164 --> 00:43:16,832
She's heartbroken. Well, he
was heartbroken too. I mean...
712
00:43:16,834 --> 00:43:22,671
Yeah. Yeah, he was. They were
very much in love. Yeah.
713
00:43:22,673 --> 00:43:24,205
Travel safe.
714
00:43:24,207 --> 00:43:27,174
She had left a job in France;
She had lost all her tenure.
715
00:43:27,176 --> 00:43:30,010
She had to start over again,
and all she could get...
716
00:43:30,012 --> 00:43:33,646
Was this crummy job in customer
relations at Burbank airport.
717
00:43:33,648 --> 00:43:36,081
Look at this! Look what
you've done to my clothes!
718
00:43:36,083 --> 00:43:40,384
I can see, but I have another situation
to deal with first, so could you...
719
00:43:40,386 --> 00:43:42,219
hello? Hello,
is this Mrs. Durkin?
720
00:43:42,221 --> 00:43:46,256
I'm calling from the Burbank airport,
and I have your three children here.
721
00:43:46,258 --> 00:43:48,458
They did not get on the plane
because we didn't let them.
722
00:43:48,460 --> 00:43:54,263
Why not? The oldest one is seven, and they
showed up at the airport unsupervised.
723
00:43:54,265 --> 00:43:56,898
Lady! Could you just...
this is disgusting!
724
00:43:56,900 --> 00:43:59,066
Get off the phone
and talk to me!
725
00:43:59,068 --> 00:44:04,104
I really don't care if you are trying to surprise
your husband and the bitch he ran away with.
726
00:44:04,106 --> 00:44:08,207
- Lady!
- Would you just get your crap off my counter now?
727
00:44:10,010 --> 00:44:14,178
She's not happy. Mickey only comes
home about four days a month.
728
00:44:14,180 --> 00:44:17,781
She's in
this strange city all alone,
729
00:44:17,783 --> 00:44:21,851
with a job she hates, working
all hours, weekends, nights.
730
00:44:21,853 --> 00:44:26,121
She was scared. This
is L.A. we're talking about.
731
00:44:26,123 --> 00:44:28,623
She even got one of those dolls.
732
00:44:28,625 --> 00:44:31,258
What do you mean "dolls"?
It's called safe-t-man.
733
00:44:31,260 --> 00:44:36,029
You keep it in the trunk, and when you're
scared, you put it in the seat next to you.
734
00:44:36,031 --> 00:44:37,630
People think it's a guy.
735
00:44:37,632 --> 00:44:42,067
Those are good. My sister had one.
No one ever bothered her.
736
00:44:42,069 --> 00:44:43,968
Yeah, that was the reason.
737
00:44:43,970 --> 00:44:48,771
Hmm! Anyway, now something happens
to Ellen you're not gonna believe.
738
00:44:48,773 --> 00:44:50,105
Oh! Oh, this is fabulous!
739
00:44:50,107 --> 00:44:52,841
I'll tell it. I tell it better.
I'm already telling it.
740
00:44:52,843 --> 00:44:56,311
When I finish this story, you are
gonna call me a liar to my face.
741
00:44:56,313 --> 00:44:59,881
But it's the God's honest truth!
Tell it good.
742
00:44:59,883 --> 00:45:01,515
She's sitting at home at night.
743
00:45:01,517 --> 00:45:05,318
- It was day.
- No, the first part of the story.
744
00:45:05,320 --> 00:45:07,420
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, night.
Right.
745
00:45:07,422 --> 00:45:09,755
- So she's sitting at home...
- At night.
746
00:45:09,757 --> 00:45:13,859
Feeling miserable, when she
has an unexpected visitor.
747
00:45:13,861 --> 00:45:17,995
- The first husband from Paris?
- Close.
748
00:45:20,532 --> 00:45:22,865
A mouse. So she calls
an exterminator.
749
00:45:22,867 --> 00:45:26,401
Glue traps. It ain't like the old
kind that snapped their heads off.
750
00:45:26,403 --> 00:45:31,072
It's just a simple, little gluey piece of paper.
You put a little food in the middle.
751
00:45:31,074 --> 00:45:35,342
The mouse comes along, looks at
the food, goes for the food,
752
00:45:35,344 --> 00:45:39,079
gets stuck, squirms around
for a while but can't get away.
753
00:45:39,081 --> 00:45:42,849
It's how Lucy and I met.
It's pretty cool.
754
00:45:42,851 --> 00:45:46,919
The next day, she comes home from shopping,
she hears a commotion in the living room.
755
00:45:46,921 --> 00:45:50,889
Oh, no! Did she get a mouse in the glue?
Eww! Wait. Wait, wait.
756
00:45:50,891 --> 00:45:53,024
Let me tell this part.
757
00:45:53,026 --> 00:45:56,360
Come on. Then you can tell the rest of it.
Okay, okay.
758
00:45:56,362 --> 00:45:58,628
She left the sliding door open,
759
00:45:58,630 --> 00:46:01,097
And a pigeon flew in,
went after the food...
760
00:46:01,099 --> 00:46:03,232
Oh, no!
And got stuck in the glue.
761
00:46:03,234 --> 00:46:06,935
- So she calls the vet.
- And the vet says, "get it right over."
762
00:46:06,937 --> 00:46:11,172
He's got some chemicals that can dissolve
the glue and save the bird. Shh!
763
00:46:11,174 --> 00:46:15,242
She puts the bird in a box, gets in
the car... And heads for the vet.
764
00:46:15,244 --> 00:46:17,777
- The bird's very nervous.
- Who wouldn't be?
765
00:46:17,779 --> 00:46:22,214
She takes off. She's driving
along; She hits a huge pothole;
766
00:46:22,216 --> 00:46:25,917
The bird flies up into the air
and sticks to her head.
767
00:46:25,919 --> 00:46:30,287
You're a liar! Told ya.
768
00:46:30,289 --> 00:46:31,655
Just get off!
769
00:46:31,657 --> 00:46:34,891
Oh, God!
770
00:46:39,930 --> 00:46:42,297
Help! Help!
771
00:46:42,532 --> 00:46:48,602
Did you see that? Those are
the earrings I wanted.
772
00:47:01,414 --> 00:47:04,348
Mrs. Gordon
for Dr. Bilch, please.
773
00:47:04,350 --> 00:47:05,682
Your, your pet's name?
774
00:47:05,684 --> 00:47:09,252
Get me Dr. Bilch,
or I'll kill you!
775
00:47:13,691 --> 00:47:15,323
Honey? In here.
776
00:47:15,325 --> 00:47:19,759
Your lover man's home.
Ah, what a trip I had...
777
00:47:19,761 --> 00:47:21,360
aaah!
778
00:47:21,362 --> 00:47:24,096
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
779
00:47:24,098 --> 00:47:25,764
Well, I'll tell her. Yeah.
780
00:47:25,766 --> 00:47:29,300
Thank you, doctor. Thanks for calling.
All right, bye.
781
00:47:29,302 --> 00:47:34,338
That was the vet. It's good news.
The pigeon's gonna make it.
782
00:47:34,640 --> 00:47:38,574
Why are you giving me the
stink eye? What did I do?
783
00:47:38,576 --> 00:47:40,642
You had mice in the apartment.
784
00:47:40,644 --> 00:47:43,811
Me? I haven't
been here for a month.
785
00:47:43,813 --> 00:47:46,547
I know.
786
00:47:46,882 --> 00:47:50,049
Come on, now.
I didn't do anything.
787
00:47:50,051 --> 00:47:54,153
You just had one of those
I-had-a-bird-glued-to-my-head days.
788
00:47:54,155 --> 00:47:57,356
One minute you're normal, and
the next you're tippi hedren.
789
00:47:57,358 --> 00:47:59,491
I mean, it would
shake a person up.
790
00:47:59,493 --> 00:48:02,660
When do you go away again?
Day after tomorrow.
791
00:48:02,662 --> 00:48:05,162
For how long? Ten days.
792
00:48:05,164 --> 00:48:09,598
But then I'm home for three.
We'll go someplace.
793
00:48:09,600 --> 00:48:11,633
Great.
794
00:48:11,635 --> 00:48:14,469
Didn't you just finish one?
795
00:48:14,471 --> 00:48:16,971
I gained eight pounds, okay?
796
00:48:16,973 --> 00:48:18,639
Okay, sure. Fine with me.
797
00:48:18,641 --> 00:48:21,875
And as a matter of fact,
I think I'll gain 20 more.
798
00:48:21,877 --> 00:48:25,511
And then maybe I'll just be perfect.
How would that be?
799
00:48:25,513 --> 00:48:27,913
For me, a dream come true.
I can't wait!
800
00:48:27,915 --> 00:48:31,449
Let's go into the kitchen and have a
big stack of buttermilk pancakes.
801
00:48:31,451 --> 00:48:33,451
Come on, what do you say?
Let's get you big!
802
00:48:33,453 --> 00:48:38,722
Bring your new best friends, Ben and Jerry,
and let's turn your ass into a helipad!
803
00:48:38,724 --> 00:48:41,057
Come on!
804
00:48:43,861 --> 00:48:46,695
Oh. I look terrible.
805
00:48:46,697 --> 00:48:51,665
No, you don't. You don't.
Do. I do.
806
00:48:52,134 --> 00:48:54,434
I'm lonely. Aww.
807
00:48:54,436 --> 00:48:58,704
Oh, Mickey, I hate my job.
I hate this apartment.
808
00:48:58,706 --> 00:49:02,407
I didn't come all the way
from France to be alone.
809
00:49:03,176 --> 00:49:08,245
And lately, I've been having
certain feelings...
810
00:49:08,247 --> 00:49:12,715
About safe-t-man.
811
00:49:15,319 --> 00:49:18,821
Oh, Ellen, I love you.
I love you so much.
812
00:49:18,823 --> 00:49:20,956
I wish there was
something I could do,
813
00:49:20,958 --> 00:49:24,192
but it's not like I can
quit my job or anything.
814
00:49:24,194 --> 00:49:26,227
Why not?
815
00:49:26,229 --> 00:49:27,528
What?
816
00:49:27,530 --> 00:49:30,864
Why can't you quit your job?
817
00:49:30,866 --> 00:49:32,065
I... that's, uh...
818
00:49:32,067 --> 00:49:35,168
that's impossible.
I mean, it's ridiculous.
819
00:49:35,170 --> 00:49:38,671
It's ridiculous? I quit my job.
820
00:49:38,673 --> 00:49:42,674
Remember? I gave up
everything for you.
821
00:49:43,910 --> 00:49:45,476
Yeah? Yeah.
822
00:49:45,478 --> 00:49:50,146
Why don't you come out on the road again with me?
Now, that was great.
823
00:49:50,148 --> 00:49:51,480
Great?
824
00:49:51,482 --> 00:49:53,548
Every other day
on a different plane?
825
00:49:53,550 --> 00:49:58,552
Dinner in the hotel room at 1:00 A.M. from
room service while you iced down your knees.
826
00:49:58,554 --> 00:50:01,621
Who wants to live like that?
827
00:50:02,223 --> 00:50:05,123
I do. I like my job.
828
00:50:05,125 --> 00:50:08,059
Why can't you do it locally?
You know, high school.
829
00:50:08,061 --> 00:50:11,996
High school? Those kids are armed.
Honey, I'm a pro.
830
00:50:11,998 --> 00:50:16,233
I'm one of the best in the league and
I've been doing it for ten years.
831
00:50:16,235 --> 00:50:18,268
I mean, it's what I do.
832
00:50:18,270 --> 00:50:20,703
All right. I'm sorry.
833
00:50:20,705 --> 00:50:24,773
I mean, I know that
your job means a lot to you.
834
00:50:24,775 --> 00:50:28,176
I just can't do this anymore.
835
00:50:36,251 --> 00:50:37,850
So he calls me.
836
00:50:37,852 --> 00:50:41,386
I once offered him a job
selling cars for his off-season.
837
00:50:41,388 --> 00:50:44,722
I figured he'd be good at it.
He had the personality.
838
00:50:44,724 --> 00:50:46,423
So he quit?
839
00:50:46,425 --> 00:50:50,459
He asked the league for
a year off, a leave of absence.
840
00:50:50,461 --> 00:50:52,861
So he and Ellen
are together again.
841
00:50:52,863 --> 00:50:55,196
She talks him into buying some
little house in the valley.
842
00:50:55,198 --> 00:50:58,966
It was charming.
If charming means overpriced.
843
00:50:58,968 --> 00:51:02,636
Anyway, she's workin' out.She looks fabulous.
844
00:51:02,638 --> 00:51:04,638
Yeah, everything's great...
For her.
845
00:51:04,640 --> 00:51:07,107
Plus, the knuckleheads at
the airlines finally realized...
846
00:51:07,109 --> 00:51:10,343
That Ellen's, like, 90 times too
qualified for the job she's got.
847
00:51:10,345 --> 00:51:15,147
They move her into a big office where
she's the head of a whole department.
848
00:51:15,149 --> 00:51:17,682
She's the happiest
she's ever been in her life.
849
00:51:17,684 --> 00:51:20,384
Oh, good. And how's Mickey?
850
00:51:20,386 --> 00:51:23,687
Mickey is not wonderful.
851
00:51:23,855 --> 00:51:26,589
Um, what kind of
mileage does it get?
852
00:51:26,591 --> 00:51:28,924
Fabulous. Fabulous mileage.
853
00:51:28,926 --> 00:51:32,227
It gets 100 in the city and
3,000 on the highway. What?
854
00:51:32,229 --> 00:51:36,630
Car and driver called the,
um... what are we in? Subaru.
855
00:51:36,632 --> 00:51:40,000
Right. Said it was "great."
Unquote.
856
00:51:40,002 --> 00:51:42,102
So you actually knew
Michael Jordan?
857
00:51:42,104 --> 00:51:45,171
Knew him? I'm the one
who shaved his head.
858
00:51:45,173 --> 00:51:49,942
So, she's happy, he's miserable.
And the way his mind works is...
859
00:51:49,944 --> 00:51:53,578
what the hell
is makin' her so happy?
860
00:51:53,580 --> 00:51:55,346
That was Ellen.
861
00:51:55,348 --> 00:51:56,914
- Who?
- Follow that car!
862
00:51:56,916 --> 00:52:00,517
The Porsche! Catch up to it!
Okay, okay.
863
00:52:00,519 --> 00:52:02,652
Come on, gun this rickshaw!
864
00:52:02,654 --> 00:52:05,154
Move it! That's my wife!
865
00:52:05,156 --> 00:52:08,257
Ha! Ellen!
866
00:52:08,259 --> 00:52:11,193
Ah...
867
00:52:11,562 --> 00:52:14,663
it's not her. Ha-ha-ha-ha!
868
00:52:14,665 --> 00:52:18,332
- It's not her!
- Ha-ha-ha-ha!
869
00:52:20,102 --> 00:52:22,869
Aaah! Aaah!
870
00:52:28,542 --> 00:52:30,008
So, you like it?
871
00:52:30,010 --> 00:52:32,210
It wasn't that Mickey
couldn't sell cars.
872
00:52:32,212 --> 00:52:35,646
Most days he wasn't that bad,
but his heart wasn't in it.
873
00:52:35,648 --> 00:52:39,082
The worst
was during the play-offs.
874
00:52:39,084 --> 00:52:42,785
Poor Mickey.
That was a rough time for him.
875
00:52:42,787 --> 00:52:45,420
It was rough
because he made it rough.
876
00:52:45,422 --> 00:52:47,054
Craig gave him a good job.
877
00:52:47,056 --> 00:52:50,757
My brother Richard was dying for that job.
Again with Richard?
878
00:52:50,759 --> 00:52:53,259
I'm just saying, unlike Mickey,
879
00:52:53,261 --> 00:52:55,394
Richard would have
appreciated that job.
880
00:52:55,396 --> 00:52:57,896
Richard needs instructions
on how to put on a hat.
881
00:52:57,898 --> 00:53:00,398
He fell down some stepswhen he was a baby.
882
00:53:00,400 --> 00:53:03,434
It's a whole other story. Can
we get back to the point?
883
00:53:03,436 --> 00:53:07,371
You're giving her the wrong idea.
You're making Ellen the villain.
884
00:53:07,373 --> 00:53:10,707
There's two sides to everything, right?
You tell it.
885
00:53:10,709 --> 00:53:14,477
Ellen would talk to me
sometimes during that period.
886
00:53:14,479 --> 00:53:15,978
Veal parmigiana. What?
887
00:53:15,980 --> 00:53:19,681
That's the only thing
he'll eat at a restaurant.
888
00:53:19,683 --> 00:53:21,449
I know.
We've been out with him.
889
00:53:21,451 --> 00:53:25,085
There's just so many things he'll only do.
He'll only go to the movies.
890
00:53:25,087 --> 00:53:27,720
"What do you want to do tonight?"
"Let's go to a movie."
891
00:53:27,722 --> 00:53:33,858
That's what he's used to. In Paris he
went to the museum and to the ballet.
892
00:53:33,860 --> 00:53:35,626
Forget Paris. He was courting.
893
00:53:35,628 --> 00:53:40,530
They'll do anything when they're courting.
Craig knitted me a sweater.
894
00:53:40,532 --> 00:53:43,633
I took him to the theater
to see phantom of the opera.
895
00:53:43,635 --> 00:53:46,135
Oh, that's so beautiful! Yeah!
896
00:53:46,137 --> 00:53:47,970
So you know what Mickey said?
897
00:53:47,972 --> 00:53:51,340
You liked it? I loved it.
It was romantic.
898
00:53:51,342 --> 00:53:56,011
Guy's got broken dinnerware on his
face... under which is a pizza...
899
00:53:56,013 --> 00:53:59,848
and she's in love with him? She
was in love with his soul.
900
00:53:59,850 --> 00:54:03,151
That's ridiculous. It's
like beauty and the beast.
901
00:54:03,153 --> 00:54:04,986
It's all stuff
they sell to women.
902
00:54:04,988 --> 00:54:08,022
The sweetest guy in my high school
was a guy named Teddy Stein.
903
00:54:08,024 --> 00:54:10,557
He had a little bit of a droopy
eye and a mole on his cheek.
904
00:54:10,559 --> 00:54:15,494
Could not get a date. But, no, this
"phantom" with an exploded head,
905
00:54:15,496 --> 00:54:18,096
women are squirming in their seats.
It's not real.
906
00:54:18,098 --> 00:54:20,565
- I loved it. The music...
- The music?
907
00:54:20,567 --> 00:54:23,367
You know what the big song was?
It was "school days."
908
00:54:23,369 --> 00:54:27,204
- What?
- Yeah! ¶ Da-da, da-da ¶
909
00:54:27,206 --> 00:54:30,574
¶ da, da-da, da-da, da
school days, school days ¶
910
00:54:30,576 --> 00:54:35,245
¶ dear old golden rule days
¶¶ they think we're dopes?
911
00:54:35,247 --> 00:54:40,449
- You hated the whole evening?
- No, no. The veal parmigiana was good.
912
00:54:40,451 --> 00:54:44,786
It was a hard time for him.
He was unhappy,
913
00:54:44,788 --> 00:54:46,387
so everything irritated him
more than usual.
914
00:54:46,389 --> 00:54:50,457
I guess. So, she was irritating
him and he was irritating her.
915
00:54:50,459 --> 00:54:53,560
They were irritating each other.
Things were horrible.
916
00:54:53,562 --> 00:54:56,563
But then they got much worse.
What do you mean?
917
00:54:56,565 --> 00:54:58,331
The father. The father!
918
00:54:58,333 --> 00:55:00,333
I forgot about the father.
The father's dead.
919
00:55:00,335 --> 00:55:03,069
They buried him in France.
No, Ellen's father.
920
00:55:03,071 --> 00:55:05,204
Oh, Ellen's father.
Why didn't you say?
921
00:55:05,206 --> 00:55:07,973
More Perrier, please.
This was a nightmare.
922
00:55:07,975 --> 00:55:10,075
Why? Ellen's father retired.
He was a widower.
923
00:55:10,077 --> 00:55:13,578
He also had a few health problems.
Health problem.
924
00:55:13,580 --> 00:55:16,247
Of course the wrestling brothers
didn't want to take him.
925
00:55:16,249 --> 00:55:18,449
So he moves in
with Ellen and Mickey.
926
00:55:18,451 --> 00:55:21,752
Ellen's working days. Mickey, 'cause he's
selling cars, is working a lot of nights.
927
00:55:21,754 --> 00:55:25,322
Mickey's home a lot
with Ellen's dad, Arthur.
928
00:55:25,324 --> 00:55:32,295
Arthur is the kind of guy who
could drive you insane. How?
929
00:55:32,297 --> 00:55:35,131
You asked for it,
930
00:55:35,133 --> 00:55:37,566
you got it.
931
00:55:37,568 --> 00:55:40,768
¶ Toyota ¶
932
00:55:42,705 --> 00:55:45,405
you asked for it,
933
00:55:45,407 --> 00:55:48,241
you got it.
934
00:55:48,243 --> 00:55:52,544
¶ Toyota ¶
935
00:55:54,781 --> 00:55:57,715
you asked for it,
936
00:55:57,717 --> 00:55:59,717
you got it!
937
00:55:59,719 --> 00:56:02,086
¶ Toyota ¶
938
00:56:05,324 --> 00:56:07,724
You got it!
939
00:56:09,594 --> 00:56:13,562
¶ Toyota ¶
940
00:56:20,036 --> 00:56:24,737
you... asked for it,
941
00:56:24,739 --> 00:56:27,539
you got it!
942
00:56:29,876 --> 00:56:33,010
¶ Toyota ¶
943
00:56:33,012 --> 00:56:35,879
¶ you asked for it ¶
944
00:56:35,881 --> 00:56:38,681
¶ you got it ¶
945
00:56:38,683 --> 00:56:42,518
¶ Toyota ¶¶
946
00:56:42,520 --> 00:56:46,822
Ed's tropical aquarium.
947
00:56:46,824 --> 00:56:49,491
Mattress city.
948
00:56:49,493 --> 00:56:52,627
Donuts, donuts, donuts.
949
00:56:52,629 --> 00:56:55,896
Mr. Sid's tuxedos.
950
00:56:55,898 --> 00:57:02,068
Six guys from Greece,
authentic Greek food.
951
00:57:05,540 --> 00:57:08,207
Why don't you tell him to stop?
952
00:57:08,209 --> 00:57:10,909
I don't think he knows
that he's doing it.
953
00:57:10,911 --> 00:57:12,443
So this is your life now?
954
00:57:12,445 --> 00:57:16,380
How did you let this happen to you?
I don't know.
955
00:57:16,382 --> 00:57:21,718
The longest I lived with anybody
before this was... eight hours.
956
00:57:21,720 --> 00:57:23,653
And that made me feel stifled.
957
00:57:23,655 --> 00:57:25,287
I'm just not used to it,
that's all.
958
00:57:25,289 --> 00:57:28,523
I'm not used to somebody else
having an opinion about my life.
959
00:57:28,525 --> 00:57:33,260
An opinion that I have to listen to.
No, you don't.
960
00:57:33,262 --> 00:57:34,794
I don't? No.
961
00:57:34,796 --> 00:57:38,130
Jack, what are you saying? A wife
is just somebody to adore you...
962
00:57:38,132 --> 00:57:40,932
And have sex with you and
otherwise not bother you?
963
00:57:40,934 --> 00:57:42,800
Keep goin'.
964
00:57:42,802 --> 00:57:44,868
- What?
- Hey! Chef of the future.
965
00:57:44,870 --> 00:57:47,203
What's goin' on with the meat?
Makin' progress?
966
00:57:47,205 --> 00:57:49,071
It's not quite there yet.
967
00:57:49,073 --> 00:57:54,342
You want to give me a time frame, like
maybe next week, the fall, Christmas?
968
00:57:54,344 --> 00:57:57,244
Let me know so we can
plan our vacation around it.
969
00:57:57,246 --> 00:57:59,946
It's just this short
of greatness.
970
00:57:59,948 --> 00:58:01,480
So are you, Jack.
971
00:58:01,482 --> 00:58:04,316
Ha, ha. Got you.
That's a good one.
972
00:58:04,318 --> 00:58:06,518
Hey, go, make
the girl food, the salad.
973
00:58:06,520 --> 00:58:11,755
Ooh, Ellen, let's go make
the girl food, the salad.
974
00:58:12,190 --> 00:58:15,925
The same thing happened to
me when I first got married.
975
00:58:15,927 --> 00:58:20,162
"How can you leave me all the time?
I didn't get married to be alone."
976
00:58:20,164 --> 00:58:22,264
She said to me,
"ya gotta give it up.
977
00:58:22,266 --> 00:58:24,065
Ya gotta stay home,
get a real job."
978
00:58:24,067 --> 00:58:28,537
But I said, "you're asking me to give
up what I do, what I am. I can't."
979
00:58:28,539 --> 00:58:32,606
And she understood? No, we
worked out a compromise.
980
00:58:32,608 --> 00:58:36,542
I went back to work and
she divorced me. Lois?
981
00:58:36,544 --> 00:58:40,546
No, this was Beverly,
the first Mrs. Jack.
982
00:58:40,548 --> 00:58:45,550
I didn't know about her. Yeah!
Then I met Lois and she got it.
983
00:58:45,552 --> 00:58:47,785
Got what?
984
00:58:47,787 --> 00:58:52,655
Look, Mickey, I don't like to stick
my nose into anybody's business.
985
00:58:52,657 --> 00:58:56,525
But? But, if you're with a
woman and she doesn't get it,
986
00:58:56,527 --> 00:59:01,062
she doesn't get what you're
about, what's in your guts,
987
00:59:01,064 --> 00:59:03,030
move on.
988
00:59:03,032 --> 00:59:05,098
"Move on"?
989
00:59:05,100 --> 00:59:10,236
Move on.
Jack, what are you saying?
990
00:59:10,805 --> 00:59:13,705
I'm sayin', move on.
991
00:59:17,944 --> 00:59:20,878
Hey, you're up. Yeah.
992
00:59:20,880 --> 00:59:22,813
I gotta get goin'.
993
00:59:22,815 --> 00:59:25,448
You look nice. Thanks.
994
00:59:25,450 --> 00:59:28,784
Could I talk to you about a
few things before you go?
995
00:59:28,786 --> 00:59:31,653
I hardly get to see you anymore.
Sure. What is it?
996
00:59:31,655 --> 00:59:35,856
I just wanted to tell ya... you
asked for it, you got it.
997
00:59:35,858 --> 00:59:37,924
¶ Toyota ¶
998
00:59:37,926 --> 00:59:40,259
morning, pop.
999
00:59:43,063 --> 00:59:47,264
Non-dairy creamer.
1000
00:59:47,266 --> 00:59:49,532
Hmm.
1001
00:59:55,171 --> 00:59:58,372
You asked for it, you got it.
1002
00:59:58,374 --> 01:00:01,141
What's going on with you?
1003
01:00:01,143 --> 01:00:07,513
I, um... I'm going
back to refereeing.
1004
01:00:09,717 --> 01:00:12,184
Oh.
1005
01:00:12,886 --> 01:00:18,622
I called the league and I told them
that I want to go back to work.
1006
01:00:19,324 --> 01:00:20,890
Ellen, I tried.
You saw that I tried.
1007
01:00:20,892 --> 01:00:24,026
I can't do this anymore. I can't
sit here with him all day.
1008
01:00:24,028 --> 01:00:29,163
When you said he was gonna live with us, you
gave no clue as to what shape he was in.
1009
01:00:29,165 --> 01:00:32,299
Shh. Honey, he's sick.
What do you want me to do?
1010
01:00:32,301 --> 01:00:35,201
You take care of him.
Take him to work with you.
1011
01:00:35,203 --> 01:00:37,703
He can wander around
the airport muttering.
1012
01:00:37,705 --> 01:00:40,839
There's thousands of people
who do that.
1013
01:00:45,444 --> 01:00:49,579
So if he wasn't here,
everything would be fine?
1014
01:00:49,581 --> 01:00:50,813
No.
1015
01:00:50,815 --> 01:00:55,450
Ellen, I like being a referee.
I love being a referee.
1016
01:00:55,452 --> 01:00:59,020
It's a big part of who I am
and I'm startin' to miss me.
1017
01:00:59,022 --> 01:01:00,921
And me is the guy you married.
1018
01:01:00,923 --> 01:01:03,323
So when did you decide
to do this?
1019
01:01:03,325 --> 01:01:06,259
I've been thinking about it
for a couple of weeks.
1020
01:01:06,261 --> 01:01:10,128
In all that time, did it
occur to you to talk to me?
1021
01:01:10,130 --> 01:01:11,762
I mean, to see what I thought?
1022
01:01:11,764 --> 01:01:14,765
No, because I already knew
what you thought.
1023
01:01:14,767 --> 01:01:18,601
But you're doing it anyway?
1024
01:01:19,604 --> 01:01:23,505
I have to do this!
It's important to us!
1025
01:01:23,507 --> 01:01:26,808
I want to love you
and not resent you.
1026
01:01:26,810 --> 01:01:28,276
You resent me? Tsk!
1027
01:01:28,278 --> 01:01:31,545
Yeah, because when you
were unhappy, I cared.
1028
01:01:31,547 --> 01:01:33,246
Now, I'm unhappy
and you don't care.
1029
01:01:33,248 --> 01:01:36,215
I just found out you were unhappy.
I haven't had time not to care.
1030
01:01:36,217 --> 01:01:40,385
You didn't notice? Yesterday I ran out
of toothpaste and burst into tears.
1031
01:01:40,387 --> 01:01:42,320
Does that seem normal to you?
1032
01:01:42,322 --> 01:01:46,223
Does it seem normal we never have sex anymore?
Has that caught your attention?
1033
01:01:46,225 --> 01:01:49,125
Come on, we're on
different schedules now.
1034
01:01:49,127 --> 01:01:52,161
When you come home, I'm asleep already.
When I come home...
1035
01:01:52,163 --> 01:01:56,231
we used to do it 19 times a day
in every room in the house.
1036
01:01:56,233 --> 01:02:00,501
Then we'd go to the kramers to see if they
were home so we could use their place.
1037
01:02:00,503 --> 01:02:04,137
Two times. Two times you wanted
to have sex and I didn't.
1038
01:02:04,139 --> 01:02:07,974
No, 50 times I wanted to have sex and you didn't.
Two times I asked.
1039
01:02:07,976 --> 01:02:10,676
Is that my fault? Why didn't
you ask the other times?
1040
01:02:10,678 --> 01:02:14,546
I don't want to always be the one
to ask when you show no interest.
1041
01:02:14,548 --> 01:02:17,382
What about when I ask
and you show no interest?
1042
01:02:17,384 --> 01:02:20,618
- When did that happen?
- Last week, in the morning.
1043
01:02:20,620 --> 01:02:24,521
Don't you remember? I started to do
that thing that you used to like.
1044
01:02:24,523 --> 01:02:26,656
You said, "no! Get off of me!
What is that?"
1045
01:02:26,658 --> 01:02:29,091
That was 6:30 in the morning.
I was fast asleep.
1046
01:02:29,093 --> 01:02:31,660
That wasn't love. You were
slipping me into your schedule.
1047
01:02:31,662 --> 01:02:35,863
Fine, if that's the way
you see it.
1048
01:02:36,565 --> 01:02:40,633
Oh, Mickey. Look,
I have a vacation coming up.
1049
01:02:40,635 --> 01:02:45,670
Why don't we just... we could go
to that place in Santa Barbara.
1050
01:02:45,672 --> 01:02:48,906
I'm leaving Monday.
1051
01:02:58,316 --> 01:03:01,750
How many more years are you
planning to do this?
1052
01:03:01,752 --> 01:03:04,953
What? Referee? Yes.
1053
01:03:04,955 --> 01:03:07,555
I don't know.
1054
01:03:08,291 --> 01:03:13,760
Well, give me a clue.
One, ten, 15?
1055
01:03:13,762 --> 01:03:17,263
I don't know.
1056
01:03:18,766 --> 01:03:21,365
I gotta go.
1057
01:03:45,722 --> 01:03:48,956
- He just left her?
- Can you believe it?
1058
01:03:48,958 --> 01:03:51,625
He didn't leave her.He went back to work.
1059
01:03:51,627 --> 01:03:55,461
But what he was saying was his job
was more important than his wife.
1060
01:03:55,463 --> 01:03:57,296
No, they were both important.
1061
01:03:57,298 --> 01:04:00,032
A marriage can't work when one person
is happy and the other is miserable.
1062
01:04:00,034 --> 01:04:04,102
Marriage is both people
being equally miserable.
1063
01:04:05,238 --> 01:04:08,305
What? No. I was just kid...
1064
01:04:08,307 --> 01:04:13,543
what would happen if I lost my column and
had to go back on the road to cover a team?
1065
01:04:13,545 --> 01:04:15,578
Could that happen? Of course.
1066
01:04:15,580 --> 01:04:18,280
Papers fold, papers merge.
You get a new editor.
1067
01:04:18,282 --> 01:04:20,115
You never said anything
about this before.
1068
01:04:20,117 --> 01:04:25,019
Would it have made any difference?
Well, no, not really.
1069
01:04:25,021 --> 01:04:29,556
"Not really"? Ooh, that's
a real crowd pleaser.
1070
01:04:30,258 --> 01:04:34,659
Okay, well, sure. It would make some difference.
How could it not?
1071
01:04:34,661 --> 01:04:37,161
We're getting married Sunday.
I'd like to know...
1072
01:04:37,163 --> 01:04:40,531
If I'm getting the first Mrs. Jack
or the second Mrs. Jack.
1073
01:04:40,533 --> 01:04:46,570
Any man who refers to his wives
as Mrs. Jack is an idiot.
1074
01:04:46,572 --> 01:04:50,773
And any man who repeats it
is a bigger idiot.
1075
01:04:52,610 --> 01:04:54,976
I'll...
1076
01:04:57,246 --> 01:05:00,780
I better... nah, nah.
Sit down. Relax.
1077
01:05:00,782 --> 01:05:05,250
Lucy will fix it. She's the
Bob villa of relationships.
1078
01:05:05,252 --> 01:05:07,652
You're hungry. Have some bread.
1079
01:05:07,654 --> 01:05:10,087
Everything will look
better after bread.
1080
01:05:10,089 --> 01:05:14,657
Why did I start anything?
Why did I say that to her?
1081
01:05:16,661 --> 01:05:18,727
This is good. Is there butter?
1082
01:05:18,729 --> 01:05:22,797
Take it easy. It's nothing.
It's just pre-wedding jitters.
1083
01:05:22,799 --> 01:05:27,067
You think? The week I got
married I threw up every day.
1084
01:05:27,069 --> 01:05:30,970
Of course, it turned out her mother
was poisoning me. Will you stop?
1085
01:05:30,972 --> 01:05:33,505
Will you just stop?
1086
01:05:33,507 --> 01:05:36,574
Oh, I think I'm scared.
Of what?
1087
01:05:36,576 --> 01:05:38,509
"Of what?" That I parked
too far from the curb.
1088
01:05:38,511 --> 01:05:43,747
What do you mean? I've been single for
40 years and I'm getting married Sunday.
1089
01:05:43,749 --> 01:05:45,348
Oh, God!
1090
01:05:45,350 --> 01:05:48,651
Come on. Take it easy.
1091
01:05:48,653 --> 01:05:52,854
You're all right. Why
did I say that to him?
1092
01:05:52,856 --> 01:05:54,589
I didn't mean that.
1093
01:05:54,591 --> 01:05:56,791
Maybe I'm just too scared
to get married.
1094
01:05:56,793 --> 01:06:01,161
Listen to me. I lost 15
pounds for this wedding.
1095
01:06:01,163 --> 01:06:03,096
You're getting married.
1096
01:06:03,098 --> 01:06:07,733
You shouldn't listen to Ellen and Mickey
stories before you're gonna get married.
1097
01:06:07,735 --> 01:06:12,203
It's like watching a horror
movie before you go to bed.
1098
01:06:12,205 --> 01:06:16,507
But you think Mickey was wrong
and Ellen was right, don't you?
1099
01:06:16,509 --> 01:06:17,975
Of course! Yeah.
1100
01:06:17,977 --> 01:06:21,378
Also, Ellen was wrong
and Mickey was right.
1101
01:06:21,380 --> 01:06:25,314
See, their marriage
had one overriding problem.
1102
01:06:25,316 --> 01:06:26,848
One was a man
and one was a woman.
1103
01:06:26,850 --> 01:06:32,319
So what happened?
Did they break up?
1104
01:06:32,321 --> 01:06:34,088
It was kind of hard to tell.
1105
01:06:34,090 --> 01:06:37,157
Were they separated because he
just happened to be out of town?
1106
01:06:37,159 --> 01:06:42,628
Or were they separated because they were...
You know, separated?
1107
01:06:42,630 --> 01:06:44,496
Maybe I got married too fast.
1108
01:06:44,498 --> 01:06:50,501
No, there's no such thing as too fast or too slow.
It's whenever it's right.
1109
01:06:50,503 --> 01:06:52,135
Though you did move
a little fast.
1110
01:06:52,137 --> 01:06:57,373
It's just that when my first
marriage ended, I felt so lost.
1111
01:06:57,375 --> 01:07:02,110
I wasn't looking for anyone,
but then he just came along.
1112
01:07:02,112 --> 01:07:03,311
Mickey? Yeah.
1113
01:07:03,313 --> 01:07:05,413
He was so different than
the other guys. He was cute.
1114
01:07:05,415 --> 01:07:11,351
He's adorable. Every time I see him, I
want to pick him up and give him a hug.
1115
01:07:11,353 --> 01:07:12,885
Yeah.
1116
01:07:12,887 --> 01:07:17,622
The other ones were
very polished, stylish.
1117
01:07:17,624 --> 01:07:19,857
Then this little referee
shows up.
1118
01:07:19,859 --> 01:07:24,994
He made me laugh. Put me on a pedestal.
He made me feel loved.
1119
01:07:24,996 --> 01:07:27,763
As only a little referee can.
1120
01:07:27,765 --> 01:07:32,800
He was just what I needed
to get me through that.
1121
01:07:32,802 --> 01:07:35,135
Oh, God. What?
1122
01:07:35,137 --> 01:07:40,440
Do you think I married
Mickey on the rebound?
1123
01:07:40,442 --> 01:07:47,312
What's so funny? Get it? Rebound.
He's a basketball referee.
1124
01:07:49,683 --> 01:07:51,649
Keep your seats, kids. Ow!
1125
01:07:51,651 --> 01:07:53,350
You know the difference
between us, Mickey?
1126
01:07:53,352 --> 01:07:56,219
You still enjoy your mother bathing you?
No, my friend.
1127
01:07:56,221 --> 01:08:01,757
You're a dope and I'm not. I say
that with the greatest affection.
1128
01:08:01,759 --> 01:08:03,191
I'm a dope? Craig?
1129
01:08:03,193 --> 01:08:07,227
Big dope. You and I are both the same.
We're rigid.
1130
01:08:07,229 --> 01:08:08,962
I'm not rigid. Craig?
1131
01:08:08,964 --> 01:08:12,632
You're an ironing board.
That's not true.
1132
01:08:12,634 --> 01:08:15,101
Please! Come on, guys.
I change.
1133
01:08:15,103 --> 01:08:16,068
Tuna rye. Me.
1134
01:08:16,070 --> 01:08:17,202
Tuna wheat. Me.
1135
01:08:17,204 --> 01:08:18,770
- Veal parmigiana sandwich.
- Him!
1136
01:08:18,772 --> 01:08:21,372
See? I know what I am.
So, I don't get married.
1137
01:08:21,374 --> 01:08:26,042
You think a woman is gonna let me
spend $1,400 on old baseball cards?
1138
01:08:26,044 --> 01:08:28,844
Forget it! But you married
this woman, Mickey.
1139
01:08:28,846 --> 01:08:34,816
Then you seem upset that your life isn't
exactly the same as it was before.
1140
01:08:36,920 --> 01:08:40,688
It isn't. You're married.
1141
01:08:40,690 --> 01:08:43,790
And you're up.
1142
01:08:47,628 --> 01:08:51,696
When he travels,
not only am I lonely,
1143
01:08:51,698 --> 01:08:55,132
I don't even know
who I am by myself.
1144
01:08:55,134 --> 01:08:56,533
You don't?
1145
01:08:56,535 --> 01:08:59,736
No. You know, like
when you're with a guy...
1146
01:08:59,738 --> 01:09:04,506
not just for a night but really with,
like a husband or a boyfriend,
1147
01:09:04,508 --> 01:09:11,245
and you keep reinventing yourself to be
the perfect woman for that relationship.
1148
01:09:11,247 --> 01:09:14,248
Yeah, right, right.
1149
01:09:14,950 --> 01:09:20,052
I don't know. If I took
time before or between,
1150
01:09:20,054 --> 01:09:23,855
you know, to find out
who I really am by myself,
1151
01:09:23,857 --> 01:09:29,293
who I could be, you know,
without any guy around...
1152
01:09:29,295 --> 01:09:31,662
I know I'm in here somewhere.
1153
01:09:31,664 --> 01:09:34,865
I can hear myself
screaming from a distance.
1154
01:09:34,867 --> 01:09:38,134
Does Mickey know
you feel this way?
1155
01:09:39,604 --> 01:09:43,172
I just don't think Mickey would
understand it in the right way.
1156
01:09:43,174 --> 01:09:45,340
Things just weren'tcomfortable anymore.
1157
01:09:45,342 --> 01:09:48,943
For either of them. It was like
they were pretending to be married.
1158
01:09:48,945 --> 01:09:54,448
It was sad because they were married
and they were both very lonely.
1159
01:09:54,450 --> 01:09:56,583
Aw, gee.
1160
01:09:56,585 --> 01:10:01,321
Brushless carwash.
1161
01:10:02,724 --> 01:10:06,725
Mario's pizza town.
1162
01:10:08,428 --> 01:10:11,262
Laundry world.
1163
01:10:11,464 --> 01:10:15,698
They decided to get help. They
went to a marriage counselor.
1164
01:10:15,700 --> 01:10:17,966
First of all, let me
explain my philosophy.
1165
01:10:17,968 --> 01:10:21,369
The way I see it, marriage is
simply a form of legalized rape.
1166
01:10:21,371 --> 01:10:25,039
Mickey thought they should see someone
else, doctors don and Debbie.
1167
01:10:25,041 --> 01:10:29,909
If you miss me so much, why aren't
you happy when I come home?
1168
01:10:29,911 --> 01:10:31,610
I know you're going
to leave again.
1169
01:10:31,612 --> 01:10:34,746
I'm going to leave, so let's not
have a good time while I'm home?
1170
01:10:34,748 --> 01:10:37,381
Now it's my fault that we
don't have a good time?
1171
01:10:37,383 --> 01:10:41,584
When I come home, I'm excited to see you.
You're not excited, Mickey.
1172
01:10:41,586 --> 01:10:45,487
You're horny.
Is that such a bad thing?
1173
01:10:45,489 --> 01:10:49,757
When do you two get involved?
When there's gunplay?
1174
01:10:53,862 --> 01:10:58,764
I just want it to always
be like that week in Paris.
1175
01:10:58,766 --> 01:11:02,100
It can't be like that, Mickey.
1176
01:11:02,102 --> 01:11:03,401
I know.
1177
01:11:03,403 --> 01:11:06,504
So finally, things
weren't getting any better.
1178
01:11:06,506 --> 01:11:09,906
So, Ellen did
what she had to do.
1179
01:11:20,649 --> 01:11:23,182
Ellen?
1180
01:12:08,025 --> 01:12:10,291
Hi! You're back already?
1181
01:12:10,293 --> 01:12:12,926
Yeah. Where were you?
1182
01:12:12,928 --> 01:12:15,094
Wichita. I left you a note.
1183
01:12:15,096 --> 01:12:21,500
Yeah, well, I... I just got here.
Oh.
1184
01:12:21,502 --> 01:12:24,169
Where's your father?
1185
01:12:24,171 --> 01:12:27,204
Wichita.
1186
01:12:27,839 --> 01:12:29,805
What's he doin' there?
1187
01:12:29,807 --> 01:12:32,974
I left him with my brothers.
1188
01:12:32,976 --> 01:12:35,776
Really? Oh, Mickey.
1189
01:12:35,778 --> 01:12:38,277
I want this to work.
1190
01:12:39,280 --> 01:12:41,880
Oh, I love you.
1191
01:12:47,053 --> 01:12:49,586
Honey, I'm sorry.
I didn't mean anything.
1192
01:12:49,588 --> 01:12:51,487
Oh... oh, no, no.
Me too. Me too.
1193
01:12:51,489 --> 01:12:55,990
I was just crying about Mickey and Ellen.
It's so sweet the way she came back.
1194
01:12:55,992 --> 01:12:58,792
Why does every woman
you're with end up crying?
1195
01:12:58,794 --> 01:13:01,995
She's not...
honey, this is Jack Garrett.
1196
01:13:01,997 --> 01:13:04,397
You know, the referee.
Very nice to meet ya.
1197
01:13:04,399 --> 01:13:07,833
- I've heard a lot about you.
- Uh-oh.
1198
01:13:07,835 --> 01:13:10,702
I was the "as told to"
on Jack's book.
1199
01:13:10,704 --> 01:13:14,372
And this... is Mrs. Jack.
1200
01:13:14,374 --> 01:13:17,742
Lois. Hi, it's
very nice to meet you.
1201
01:13:17,744 --> 01:13:19,744
Congratulations. Let's eat.
1202
01:13:19,746 --> 01:13:22,012
Craig, Lucy.
Hi. Nice to meet you.
1203
01:13:22,014 --> 01:13:23,446
Lois, hi. Good to meet ya.
1204
01:13:23,448 --> 01:13:28,150
- Craig.
- Oh, yeah, you sell those Scooby-doos.
1205
01:13:28,152 --> 01:13:31,119
Subarus.
1206
01:13:31,121 --> 01:13:34,522
Asshole. Excuse me.
1207
01:13:34,524 --> 01:13:39,159
Jack, you're in the Lane too long.
Sit down. Whoops.
1208
01:13:39,161 --> 01:13:42,162
Where's Mickey?
He's doin' the knick game.
1209
01:13:42,164 --> 01:13:45,798
He should be here any minute.
With Ellen, right?
1210
01:13:45,800 --> 01:13:48,200
- Ellen?
- Yeah, why?
1211
01:13:48,202 --> 01:13:52,270
Are they still together? When I
talk to 'im, I don't ask anymore.
1212
01:13:52,272 --> 01:13:54,305
Lucy just told me
the whole story.
1213
01:13:54,307 --> 01:13:55,973
The whole thing?
About the baby?
1214
01:13:55,975 --> 01:13:57,307
Shut up.
1215
01:13:57,309 --> 01:14:01,744
- Baby?
- Hey, the plot thickens.
1216
01:14:01,746 --> 01:14:03,545
Do they make a decent Martini?
1217
01:14:03,547 --> 01:14:07,215
Absolutely. They're like me:
Dry and explosive.
1218
01:14:07,217 --> 01:14:10,918
- What baby?
- Dry, straight up, olive...
1219
01:14:10,920 --> 01:14:12,953
me too. Double. Me too.
1220
01:14:12,955 --> 01:14:14,621
Me too. What baby?
1221
01:14:14,623 --> 01:14:18,857
- Where'd you leave off?
- When she left her father in Wichita.
1222
01:14:18,859 --> 01:14:20,458
Oh! Ancient history.
1223
01:14:20,460 --> 01:14:23,627
Does she know
about him sellin' cars?
1224
01:14:23,629 --> 01:14:27,163
That test drive.
1225
01:14:27,165 --> 01:14:28,797
Hey! Listen to me!
1226
01:14:28,799 --> 01:14:33,935
Someone doesn't tell me about
this baby, asses will be kicked!
1227
01:14:35,939 --> 01:14:39,640
I like her. All right,
1228
01:14:39,642 --> 01:14:46,346
see, after she dumped the old man,
they were better for a while.
1229
01:14:48,416 --> 01:14:51,649
Oh. Oh, Mickey.
1230
01:14:52,418 --> 01:14:53,817
It's so beautiful.
1231
01:14:53,819 --> 01:14:58,187
There's something so great about
knowing we're making a baby.
1232
01:14:58,189 --> 01:15:02,057
It's gonna be wonderful. Yeah.
1233
01:15:04,895 --> 01:15:06,628
Here's why you
can't have children.
1234
01:15:06,630 --> 01:15:08,563
She had somethin' wrong
with her plumbing.
1235
01:15:08,565 --> 01:15:10,798
Not like Mrs. Jack. She folds my
underwear, she gets pregnant.
1236
01:15:10,800 --> 01:15:13,667
Ellen's fallopian tubes
were damaged.
1237
01:15:13,669 --> 01:15:17,337
That's what she gets for living
in France all those years.
1238
01:15:17,339 --> 01:15:19,038
What does that
got to do with it?
1239
01:15:19,040 --> 01:15:21,874
She was probably all clogged up with cheese.
Lovely, Jack.
1240
01:15:21,876 --> 01:15:23,976
- I'm telling the rest of this.
- Good!
1241
01:15:23,978 --> 01:15:27,645
She was devastated. They started
going to this fertility clinic.
1242
01:15:27,647 --> 01:15:29,113
She told me all about it.
1243
01:15:29,115 --> 01:15:33,050
Lois, you should see the waiting room.
All the childless couples.
1244
01:15:33,052 --> 01:15:36,853
You could cut the hopelessness
with a chain saw.
1245
01:15:36,855 --> 01:15:39,055
Mickey told Jack
it wasn't hopeless.
1246
01:15:39,057 --> 01:15:44,226
We are trying this in vitro
process for $8,000 each attempt.
1247
01:15:44,228 --> 01:15:46,127
Ouch. Ouch is right.
1248
01:15:46,129 --> 01:15:49,363
Mickey has to give me
these injections every morning.
1249
01:15:49,365 --> 01:15:51,998
Only he gets a little queasy.
1250
01:15:52,200 --> 01:15:56,802
Why don't I just hold this and you'll
jump in my lap? Mickey, come on.
1251
01:15:56,804 --> 01:16:01,373
Craig volunteered to do this because he's
used to doing it from being a diabetic.
1252
01:16:01,375 --> 01:16:04,909
But I don't want him looking at your ass.
Just do it.
1253
01:16:04,911 --> 01:16:07,077
Okay, okay. We're a team.
1254
01:16:07,079 --> 01:16:09,312
We're a team. We're a team.
Do it!
1255
01:16:09,314 --> 01:16:12,281
Ow!
1256
01:16:13,751 --> 01:16:16,785
I didn't know that. What?
How much an olive weighs?
1257
01:16:16,787 --> 01:16:20,221
No. That you wanted to
give Ellen her injections.
1258
01:16:20,223 --> 01:16:22,957
What do you mean, "wanted"?
I-I just volunteered.
1259
01:16:22,959 --> 01:16:25,392
That's so sweet.
What are you saying?
1260
01:16:25,394 --> 01:16:27,861
You saying I was trying to cop
a peek at Ellen's caboose?
1261
01:16:27,863 --> 01:16:31,264
I was trying to help some friends.
May I finish this?
1262
01:16:31,266 --> 01:16:34,033
If you feel you have to, sure.
1263
01:16:34,035 --> 01:16:35,901
What we'll do, Ellen,
is take your eggs...
1264
01:16:35,903 --> 01:16:39,537
So the fertility experts
tell Ellen and Mickey it's time.
1265
01:16:39,539 --> 01:16:44,207
They take some eggs from Ellen,
put them in a little dish,
1266
01:16:44,209 --> 01:16:48,510
then it's time for Mickey to...
how shall I say...
1267
01:16:48,512 --> 01:16:50,778
spew his manhood
into a little plastic cup.
1268
01:16:50,780 --> 01:16:54,548
- You're a real poet.
- Thank you.
1269
01:16:58,887 --> 01:17:01,153
After you.
1270
01:17:06,993 --> 01:17:09,093
Okay, can you operate a v.C.R.?
1271
01:17:09,095 --> 01:17:12,096
Why? Did you want me
to tape something for you?
1272
01:17:12,098 --> 01:17:17,801
We have x-rated tapes in case you
need some help becoming aroused.
1273
01:17:17,803 --> 01:17:20,570
Help?
1274
01:17:20,572 --> 01:17:23,673
Help? I lettered
in this in high school.
1275
01:17:23,675 --> 01:17:29,311
I used to carry a picture of
my right hand in my wallet.
1276
01:17:29,946 --> 01:17:32,313
We also have magazines.
1277
01:17:32,315 --> 01:17:33,981
Will you be all right?
Sure, sure.
1278
01:17:33,983 --> 01:17:37,718
I do wish I was back in my parents'
bathroom in Brooklyn though.
1279
01:17:37,720 --> 01:17:42,388
A lot of happy memories there.
I'll bet.
1280
01:17:42,390 --> 01:17:44,123
Yeah.
1281
01:17:44,125 --> 01:17:47,959
Use the cup.
Just come out when you're done.
1282
01:17:47,961 --> 01:17:51,329
Just one cup?
1283
01:17:59,672 --> 01:18:01,204
"Kim is an aries,
1284
01:18:01,206 --> 01:18:07,376
"who enjoys snowboarding and reading
the scriptures on a rainy night.
1285
01:18:07,378 --> 01:18:11,446
Favorite food: Juice."
1286
01:18:12,182 --> 01:18:14,182
Excuse me.
1287
01:18:14,184 --> 01:18:15,483
All done?
1288
01:18:15,485 --> 01:18:19,486
Can I see you
for a second, please?
1289
01:18:19,488 --> 01:18:21,488
Hi. Is something wrong?
1290
01:18:21,490 --> 01:18:26,426
Yes. Do you have any Sophia loren movies?
Early sixties? No.
1291
01:18:26,428 --> 01:18:30,495
She does a striptease for
marcello mastroianni. No.
1292
01:18:30,497 --> 01:18:32,230
Uh, barbarella? No!
1293
01:18:32,232 --> 01:18:35,466
There's a dick van dyke episode where
Laura petrie is in Capri pants.
1294
01:18:35,468 --> 01:18:40,303
She's doing, "oh, rob... " Mr. Gordon,
we are not a video store.
1295
01:18:40,305 --> 01:18:43,939
We don't have a selection.
I can't do this.
1296
01:18:43,941 --> 01:18:46,841
Your wife's egg is good
for only four more hours.
1297
01:18:46,843 --> 01:18:49,677
Then we might as well
scrape it into the trash.
1298
01:18:49,679 --> 01:18:52,212
That's right. Pile on the pressure.
Thank you.
1299
01:18:52,214 --> 01:18:53,713
Can't I do this at home? No!
1300
01:18:53,715 --> 01:18:57,416
Why not? The sperm has to
be inserted into the egg...
1301
01:18:57,418 --> 01:18:58,917
Within one hour of ejaculation.
1302
01:18:58,919 --> 01:19:02,754
Perfect, because I ejaculate
half an hour from here!
1303
01:19:02,756 --> 01:19:07,658
I-I mean, I live
half an hour from here.
1304
01:19:07,660 --> 01:19:11,995
Please, let me go home
where I usually do this.
1305
01:19:11,997 --> 01:19:15,698
Come on. I wanna go home.
1306
01:19:22,272 --> 01:19:25,273
Mickey, are you okay in there?
1307
01:19:25,275 --> 01:19:31,278
There it is! Okay! Okay, good.
There's a paper bag on the sink.
1308
01:19:34,016 --> 01:19:35,615
Got it. Ah!
1309
01:19:35,617 --> 01:19:38,818
My keys! My keys! They're in
the car and the car's running.
1310
01:19:38,820 --> 01:19:42,220
Okay. Bye, hon.
What'd you think about?
1311
01:19:42,789 --> 01:19:45,289
- Wish me luck!
- Piece of cake!
1312
01:19:45,291 --> 01:19:47,357
No! Don't say that!
1313
01:20:00,438 --> 01:20:03,338
No!
1314
01:20:03,340 --> 01:20:07,674
No. No, no, no! "Piece of cake!
1315
01:20:07,676 --> 01:20:11,444
Piece of cake"? She spooked it!
1316
01:20:13,981 --> 01:20:16,847
Hang on, boys!
1317
01:20:19,518 --> 01:20:21,251
Ha, ha!
1318
01:20:21,253 --> 01:20:22,952
Go, go, go!
1319
01:20:22,954 --> 01:20:26,522
What are you doing?
1320
01:20:26,524 --> 01:20:28,857
Yes. Yes! Ha, ha, ha!
1321
01:20:28,859 --> 01:20:32,893
Someday I'll tell ya
all about this, kids!
1322
01:20:35,997 --> 01:20:39,832
Do you know why I pulled you over?
Yes, I did everything wrong.
1323
01:20:39,834 --> 01:20:43,502
Officer, please, I have to get
to the hospital in 20 minutes.
1324
01:20:43,504 --> 01:20:45,637
50,000 lives are at stake.
What are you talking about?
1325
01:20:45,639 --> 01:20:48,573
Do you know what I have in this bag?
No, I don't.
1326
01:20:48,575 --> 01:20:50,274
I have a cupful of sperm.
1327
01:20:50,276 --> 01:20:52,876
Get out of the vehicle. Put
your hands on the Fender.
1328
01:20:52,878 --> 01:20:54,878
Now, move it. Put
your hands on the Fender.
1329
01:20:54,880 --> 01:20:58,915
Mickey tries to convince the cop
he's not a perverted lunatic.
1330
01:20:58,917 --> 01:21:01,951
He brings him up-to-date
on the whole story.
1331
01:21:18,100 --> 01:21:19,966
Thank you!
1332
01:21:19,968 --> 01:21:22,435
Good luck!
1333
01:21:22,437 --> 01:21:24,270
- Excuse me!
- And?
1334
01:21:24,272 --> 01:21:28,407
Hello, this is Mrs. Gordon, calling
for the results of my pregnancy test.
1335
01:21:28,409 --> 01:21:30,375
Just a moment, please.
1336
01:21:30,377 --> 01:21:30,877
¶¶
1337
01:21:35,247 --> 01:21:35,747
¶¶
1338
01:21:39,484 --> 01:21:42,518
¶¶
1339
01:21:42,520 --> 01:21:44,553
Mrs. Gordon? Yes?
1340
01:21:44,555 --> 01:21:48,656
That result was negative. Hold, please, and
I'll schedule you for another appointment.
1341
01:21:48,658 --> 01:21:50,591
- Thank you.
- ¶¶
1342
01:21:50,593 --> 01:21:53,760
You have to remember.
Besides the disappointment,
1343
01:21:53,762 --> 01:21:55,528
she's pumped full
of those hormone shots.
1344
01:21:55,530 --> 01:21:58,063
- She's a wreck.
- It's horrible for her.
1345
01:21:58,065 --> 01:22:02,267
- Forget about it.
- Most of that time, Mickey's on the road.
1346
01:22:02,269 --> 01:22:07,738
So she's doing this alone, but
they try again... for two years.
1347
01:22:07,740 --> 01:22:10,107
- Two years?
- Yeah.
1348
01:22:10,109 --> 01:22:11,575
Until finally...
1349
01:22:11,577 --> 01:22:13,810
Get it?
1350
01:22:13,812 --> 01:22:16,679
Yeah.
Uh-oh, he wants his mommy.
1351
01:22:16,681 --> 01:22:19,882
You look pretty natural.
1352
01:22:19,884 --> 01:22:24,820
Come here, you beautiful boy.
Jesse, you big boy.
1353
01:22:24,822 --> 01:22:26,822
Here, grab one of us. Sure.
1354
01:22:26,824 --> 01:22:29,024
Turn him around, honey.
Okay, all right.
1355
01:22:29,026 --> 01:22:33,595
- Say hello.
- Look at Uncle Mickey.
1356
01:22:33,597 --> 01:22:36,431
Oh! Mmm!
1357
01:22:36,433 --> 01:22:39,233
What's the matter?
1358
01:22:41,604 --> 01:22:44,838
Cute. I'm tired.
1359
01:22:44,840 --> 01:22:47,307
Let's go home.
1360
01:22:47,309 --> 01:22:51,477
I mean I'm tired
of the whole thing.
1361
01:22:51,479 --> 01:22:54,446
I want to stop.
1362
01:22:58,852 --> 01:23:01,618
You want to adopt?
1363
01:23:03,288 --> 01:23:06,956
I don't know.
1364
01:23:06,958 --> 01:23:08,424
I just...
1365
01:23:08,426 --> 01:23:13,295
I just want some time not to have
to think about it for a while.
1366
01:23:13,297 --> 01:23:17,766
All right? Okay.
1367
01:23:20,337 --> 01:23:22,003
They looked into adoption,
1368
01:23:22,005 --> 01:23:24,672
but the agencies
were not that cooperative.
1369
01:23:24,674 --> 01:23:26,740
He traveled.
She worked full-time.
1370
01:23:26,742 --> 01:23:28,341
They were on
a ten-mile-long waiting list.
1371
01:23:28,343 --> 01:23:31,477
We didn't see them that much
after that. You know...
1372
01:23:31,479 --> 01:23:33,745
- We had a baby.
- Yeah.
1373
01:23:33,747 --> 01:23:35,747
I saw them. It wasn't good.
1374
01:23:35,749 --> 01:23:38,816
There's a spot right there, Mickey.
I can't get in that spot.
1375
01:23:38,818 --> 01:23:40,884
Of course you could. I
can't get in that spot.
1376
01:23:40,886 --> 01:23:44,454
I could get in that spot. Maybe the
"phantom" could get in that spot.
1377
01:23:44,456 --> 01:23:50,293
What is that supposed to mean?
¶ school days, school days ¶
1378
01:23:50,295 --> 01:23:53,129
It was just a matter of time.
1379
01:23:53,131 --> 01:23:54,730
Sit down, please.
1380
01:23:54,732 --> 01:23:57,833
Ever been in California,captain?
1381
01:23:57,835 --> 01:24:01,102
Lots of times. Recently?
1382
01:24:01,104 --> 01:24:03,237
Mickey? What?
1383
01:24:03,239 --> 01:24:05,339
General, you're
a soldier and officer.
1384
01:24:05,341 --> 01:24:08,909
You know as well as I do I can't
give you... I want to move to Dallas.
1385
01:24:08,911 --> 01:24:12,679
What are you talking about?
1386
01:24:12,681 --> 01:24:20,153
The airline offered me a big promotion, but
it involves moving to Dallas and I want to.
1387
01:24:22,490 --> 01:24:24,223
Oh.
1388
01:24:24,225 --> 01:24:28,493
It shouldn't make that big of a
difference to you if you're in Dallas.
1389
01:24:28,495 --> 01:24:31,462
I mean, you'd be home
the same amount.
1390
01:24:31,464 --> 01:24:33,564
Right. But I'd be in Dallas.
1391
01:24:33,566 --> 01:24:38,167
So what? It's a city.
They have veal parmigiana.
1392
01:24:40,304 --> 01:24:46,141
You just can't walk into a room
and say, we're moving to Dallas.
1393
01:24:46,143 --> 01:24:48,409
- Why not?
- "Why not?"
1394
01:24:48,411 --> 01:24:52,880
Because this is my home, you know?
And I'm not givin' in this time.
1395
01:24:52,882 --> 01:24:54,948
What do you mean, "this time"?
Yeah.
1396
01:24:54,950 --> 01:24:57,283
I always end up giving in
to what you want. You?
1397
01:24:57,285 --> 01:25:00,085
Me. Would you like to add them up?
Want to see my list?
1398
01:25:00,087 --> 01:25:03,655
Do you want to see my list
while we're at it?
1399
01:25:03,657 --> 01:25:07,725
Look, they need an answer
by this week, so...
1400
01:25:07,727 --> 01:25:10,327
Make up your mind.
1401
01:25:10,329 --> 01:25:13,963
I don't need a week.
1402
01:25:13,965 --> 01:25:17,066
I'm not going.
1403
01:25:17,068 --> 01:25:20,035
Must I remind you
that a chain...
1404
01:25:20,037 --> 01:25:24,104
Is no stronger
than its weakest link?
1405
01:25:24,106 --> 01:25:28,807
Well, in that case,
I'm moving to France.
1406
01:25:29,709 --> 01:25:33,710
France? France?
1407
01:25:33,712 --> 01:25:36,145
How did France
get in the picture?
1408
01:25:36,147 --> 01:25:39,248
They gave me my choice
between Dallas and Paris.
1409
01:25:39,250 --> 01:25:41,383
I wanted Paris, but I figured
that wasn't fair to you.
1410
01:25:41,385 --> 01:25:44,452
But now since you're not even
willing to move to Dallas,
1411
01:25:44,454 --> 01:25:50,791
I might as well take the job in France,
because that's the one I really want.
1412
01:26:07,008 --> 01:26:10,843
No! No! Stop the cab! Ellen!
1413
01:26:10,845 --> 01:26:13,745
Stop, please. Stop the cab.
Ellen, please.
1414
01:26:13,747 --> 01:26:15,379
Let's talk about this. Please!
1415
01:26:15,381 --> 01:26:19,149
Ellen, please. Don't do this.
We've been through it.
1416
01:26:19,151 --> 01:26:22,051
Let's go in the house
and we'll just talk about this.
1417
01:26:22,053 --> 01:26:24,820
I have to go. You
mean you want to go.
1418
01:26:24,822 --> 01:26:27,355
Look, are we happy? Yeah!
1419
01:26:27,357 --> 01:26:32,292
You know, sometimes we have ups and downs.
But everybody does.
1420
01:26:32,294 --> 01:26:34,727
Mickey, are you happy?
1421
01:26:34,729 --> 01:26:38,197
I just think for right now
it's better if we just...
1422
01:26:38,199 --> 01:26:40,299
just what? Separate?
I'm not saying that.
1423
01:26:40,301 --> 01:26:44,002
You're not saying that, but you're going
to Paris and I'm going in the house.
1424
01:26:44,004 --> 01:26:46,104
That's not staying together.
Look, please...
1425
01:26:46,106 --> 01:26:48,873
no, I just need to go
for a little while...
1426
01:26:48,875 --> 01:26:51,275
what if you stay
until the season ends?
1427
01:26:51,277 --> 01:26:54,344
We'll go to Paris together.
We were great in Paris.
1428
01:26:54,346 --> 01:26:56,979
Forget Paris. Forget it?
1429
01:26:56,981 --> 01:26:58,947
How do you forget
the best week in your life?
1430
01:26:58,949 --> 01:27:02,750
Maybe that's all we were
is just one great week.
1431
01:27:02,752 --> 01:27:07,454
Is that what you think?
Huh? After four years?
1432
01:27:07,456 --> 01:27:11,624
You know what then? You're right.
You should go.
1433
01:27:11,626 --> 01:27:14,059
Absolutely, go.
Have a nice trip.
1434
01:27:14,061 --> 01:27:17,128
Take care of yourself, Mickey.
1435
01:27:19,465 --> 01:27:22,799
Let's go, please.
1436
01:27:25,937 --> 01:27:28,671
- That's it?
- Yeah.
1437
01:27:28,673 --> 01:27:32,474
No. She turns around
and comes running back, right?
1438
01:27:32,476 --> 01:27:35,743
Nope. She got on that plane
and flew to Paris.
1439
01:27:35,745 --> 01:27:37,478
And he went after her?
1440
01:27:37,480 --> 01:27:42,949
No. He got on another plane
to do a game in Sacramento.
1441
01:27:42,951 --> 01:27:45,217
That's how it ends?
1442
01:27:45,219 --> 01:27:48,720
Yeah. That was what?
Four months ago.
1443
01:27:48,722 --> 01:27:53,223
Now Mickey's alone
in a house he didn't want.
1444
01:27:53,225 --> 01:27:55,725
He's, you know,
adjusting... slowly.
1445
01:27:55,727 --> 01:27:59,661
¶ April in Paris ¶
1446
01:28:03,066 --> 01:28:08,502
¶ Chestnuts in blossom ¶
1447
01:28:10,606 --> 01:28:15,041
¶ holiday tables ¶
1448
01:28:15,043 --> 01:28:23,043
¶ under the trees ¶
1449
01:28:24,784 --> 01:28:31,154
¶ April in Paris ¶
1450
01:28:31,756 --> 01:28:38,226
¶ this is a feeling ¶
1451
01:28:38,228 --> 01:28:39,827
let's go!
1452
01:28:39,829 --> 01:28:44,964
¶ No one can ever ¶
1453
01:28:45,399 --> 01:28:47,332
¶ reprise ¶
1454
01:28:47,334 --> 01:28:52,636
- And Ellen?
- I spoke to her about a month ago in Paris.
1455
01:28:52,638 --> 01:28:55,171
She was lonely and,
1456
01:28:55,173 --> 01:28:57,973
you know, hmm, not bad.
1457
01:28:57,975 --> 01:29:02,310
But you know when you're talking to
someone and they tell you they're fine,
1458
01:29:02,312 --> 01:29:06,846
But you hear that thing in their
voice and you know they're not.
1459
01:29:06,848 --> 01:29:10,149
You know? That thing?She's got it.
1460
01:29:10,151 --> 01:29:13,919
¶ Never knew my heart
could sing ¶
1461
01:29:13,921 --> 01:29:20,091
¶ never missed a warm embrace ¶
1462
01:29:20,093 --> 01:29:27,063
¶ 'til April in Paris ¶
1463
01:29:27,899 --> 01:29:34,936
¶ whom can I run to ¶
1464
01:29:34,938 --> 01:29:40,675
¶ what have you done to ¶
1465
01:29:40,677 --> 01:29:47,581
¶ my heart ¶¶
1466
01:29:54,322 --> 01:29:56,221
oh, I'm ill.
1467
01:29:56,223 --> 01:30:00,124
Imagine if I actually knew them,
how sick I'd be.
1468
01:30:00,126 --> 01:30:04,127
Hey, that's not gonna be us.
1469
01:30:04,963 --> 01:30:09,798
Can we order? My stomach's
doin' the conga.
1470
01:30:09,800 --> 01:30:11,499
The warmth. I'm hungry.
1471
01:30:11,501 --> 01:30:14,668
No, he's right. Let's get
this party goin'. Waiter!
1472
01:30:14,670 --> 01:30:19,238
Ah, would you like to look
at a breakfast menu perhaps?
1473
01:30:19,240 --> 01:30:22,641
I know it's late. We're
still waiting for someone.
1474
01:30:22,643 --> 01:30:25,076
Do you happen to know what happened
tonight at the knick game?
1475
01:30:25,078 --> 01:30:28,646
Did they go overtime or something?
Because our friend is unbelievably late.
1476
01:30:28,648 --> 01:30:32,249
I don't think so, pal. People
at that table were at the game.
1477
01:30:32,251 --> 01:30:34,684
They've been there
for over half an hour.
1478
01:30:34,686 --> 01:30:39,588
Oh. Well, bring us some champagne.
The best you got.
1479
01:30:39,590 --> 01:30:42,257
- All right.
- Oh! Champagne!
1480
01:30:42,259 --> 01:30:44,292
We're getting married!
That's right.
1481
01:30:44,294 --> 01:30:48,195
Uh, you people want to know what
happened at the knick game tonight?
1482
01:30:48,197 --> 01:30:51,131
- Yeah.
- Oof! Weird game.
1483
01:30:51,133 --> 01:30:54,200
What?
I never saw somethin' like this in my life.
1484
01:30:54,202 --> 01:30:55,968
What happened?
1485
01:30:55,970 --> 01:31:00,472
It was incredible. I was standin' there
waitin' for the anthem to start.
1486
01:31:03,176 --> 01:31:05,809
You all right tonight, Mickey?
Huh?
1487
01:31:05,811 --> 01:31:07,544
Are you okay tonight?
Yeah, I'm fine.
1488
01:31:07,546 --> 01:31:09,546
Ladies and gentlemen,
1489
01:31:09,548 --> 01:31:14,283
please rise as we honor America with
the playing of our national anthem.
1490
01:31:14,285 --> 01:31:16,785
Please welcome David sanborn.
1491
01:31:20,156 --> 01:31:20,656
¶¶
1492
01:31:33,401 --> 01:31:33,901
¶¶
1493
01:31:40,274 --> 01:31:43,041
¶¶ Tom?
1494
01:31:43,043 --> 01:31:45,043
What? I can't do
the game tonight.
1495
01:31:45,045 --> 01:31:47,512
You feel sick?
I gotta catch a plane.
1496
01:31:47,514 --> 01:31:48,713
To where? Paris.
1497
01:31:48,715 --> 01:31:50,715
Right now?
You can't do that, Mickey.
1498
01:31:50,717 --> 01:31:54,852
I'm not gonna let you go. We got a game.
They're gonna throw you out of the league!
1499
01:31:54,854 --> 01:31:58,622
If they do, they do!
1500
01:32:00,092 --> 01:32:00,592
¶¶
1501
01:32:17,742 --> 01:32:23,912
I don't believe this. I was just
on my way to see you. Oh, come on.
1502
01:32:23,914 --> 01:32:27,715
I swear.
I was on my way to Paris.
1503
01:32:27,717 --> 01:32:31,585
Forget Paris. I hated Paris.
1504
01:32:32,354 --> 01:32:35,455
Oh, Mickey. What's the answer?
1505
01:32:35,457 --> 01:32:37,423
Why is it going to work
this time?
1506
01:32:37,425 --> 01:32:42,827
I don't know. But I know that we're
better together than we are apart.
1507
01:32:42,829 --> 01:32:44,762
And I know I'll move to Dallas.
1508
01:32:44,764 --> 01:32:52,035
Or Paris! Or the dark side of the moon
because home is wherever you are.
1509
01:32:53,505 --> 01:32:55,738
And I also know...
1510
01:32:55,740 --> 01:32:58,406
I love you.
1511
01:33:00,143 --> 01:33:02,176
So tell me the truth.
1512
01:33:02,178 --> 01:33:06,580
Do you think
we're gonna make it?
1513
01:33:08,951 --> 01:33:12,418
Piece of cake.
1514
01:33:19,827 --> 01:33:20,327
¶¶
1515
01:33:24,898 --> 01:33:27,365
¶¶
1516
01:33:27,700 --> 01:33:32,102
¶¶ Charge!
1517
01:33:32,104 --> 01:33:36,005
Then the Knicks lost.
They stink.
1518
01:33:36,007 --> 01:33:41,243
Well, let me get back to my food, huh?
Have a good night.
1519
01:33:44,514 --> 01:33:48,348
It's her! I know it's her!
1520
01:33:48,350 --> 01:33:51,250
It's meant to be!
1521
01:33:51,252 --> 01:33:55,854
Why does every womanyou're with end up crying?
1522
01:33:55,856 --> 01:33:58,756
- Mickey!
- Hey!
1523
01:33:58,758 --> 01:34:02,592
It's them! Ellen!
1524
01:34:02,594 --> 01:34:05,494
Oh! Oh, Mickey.
1525
01:34:05,496 --> 01:34:07,929
Hi, Ellen. Hey, Andy. Hi?
1526
01:34:07,931 --> 01:34:09,830
Liz, Ellen and Mickey.
1527
01:34:09,832 --> 01:34:13,800
Nice to meet you. Are you all right?
Oh, yeah.
1528
01:34:13,802 --> 01:34:16,135
- She'll be fine.
- Congratulations.
1529
01:34:16,137 --> 01:34:20,238
Hey, look who's here!
Hey, Craig.
1530
01:34:20,240 --> 01:34:23,474
Hi, Ellen!I can't believe this.
1531
01:34:23,476 --> 01:34:25,576
All right, champagne.
Best we got.
1532
01:34:25,578 --> 01:34:28,412
It's like me:
Bubbly and dying to go home.
1533
01:34:28,414 --> 01:34:32,548
I would like to make a toast.
A toast! Okay!
1534
01:34:32,550 --> 01:34:35,017
- To my father...
- Aw!
1535
01:34:35,019 --> 01:34:36,585
Who did one really great thing.
1536
01:34:36,587 --> 01:34:39,654
- He brought us together.
- That's nice.
1537
01:34:39,656 --> 01:34:41,122
Oh!
1538
01:34:41,124 --> 01:34:42,456
To marriage!
1539
01:34:42,458 --> 01:34:45,292
- Alla salute.
- Let's eat!
1540
01:34:45,294 --> 01:34:47,961
Sounds good to me.
1541
01:34:47,963 --> 01:34:53,265
- All right, young fellow, you first.
- Me? Okay.
1542
01:34:53,267 --> 01:34:57,035
Whoo, whoo. I know exactly
what I'm gonna have.
1543
01:34:57,037 --> 01:34:59,804
I would like the veal...
1544
01:35:00,907 --> 01:35:02,373
Picatta.
1545
01:35:02,375 --> 01:35:04,641
Yes!
1546
01:35:04,643 --> 01:35:06,175
Madam?
1547
01:35:06,177 --> 01:35:11,012
Oh! What the hell? Me too. I'm done with this.
I'm eating tonight.
1548
01:35:11,014 --> 01:35:13,314
I'll have the parmigiana.
Me too.
1549
01:35:13,316 --> 01:35:14,648
Seven piccatas.
1550
01:35:14,650 --> 01:35:16,983
Liz. You must not know
what that toast is about.
1551
01:35:16,985 --> 01:35:22,087
See, when Mickey's father passed away,
he wanted to be buried in France.
1552
01:35:22,089 --> 01:35:23,621
I was working in Paris.
1553
01:35:23,623 --> 01:35:26,490
See, you don't know
that that's a true story.
1554
01:35:26,492 --> 01:35:30,327
Helen, this is all veal.
Seven piccata, one parmigiana.
1555
01:35:30,329 --> 01:35:32,896
Fire it right up.
I got a hungry group here.
1556
01:35:32,898 --> 01:35:37,566
Two days it was lost in
Switzerland and Ellen found him.
1557
01:35:37,568 --> 01:35:40,468
That's true. That's how we
met and then the rest...
1558
01:35:40,470 --> 01:35:42,436
well, you know
that story, don't you?
1559
01:35:42,438 --> 01:35:46,440
Closed-captioned by
captions, inc. Los Angeles
1560
01:36:24,512 --> 01:36:25,012
¶¶
1561
01:36:34,454 --> 01:36:38,688
¶ Were we ever ¶
1562
01:36:38,690 --> 01:36:42,958
¶ did we use it up too fast ¶
1563
01:36:42,960 --> 01:36:45,427
¶ are great moments ¶
1564
01:36:45,429 --> 01:36:50,531
¶ never meant to last ¶
1565
01:36:50,533 --> 01:36:54,600
¶ and the last thing
that I want ¶
1566
01:36:54,602 --> 01:36:59,271
¶ is to ever make your smile ¶
1567
01:36:59,273 --> 01:37:02,474
¶ go away ¶
1568
01:37:02,476 --> 01:37:06,544
¶ keep the memories ¶
1569
01:37:06,546 --> 01:37:10,947
¶ take the best
of what we have ¶
1570
01:37:10,949 --> 01:37:13,215
¶ I can't stand to ¶
1571
01:37:13,217 --> 01:37:18,619
¶ watch what once
was great go bad ¶
1572
01:37:18,621 --> 01:37:22,522
¶ and if I can't be with you ¶
1573
01:37:22,524 --> 01:37:27,126
¶ then I'd rather
just remember ¶
1574
01:37:27,128 --> 01:37:30,696
¶ what we knew ¶
1575
01:37:30,698 --> 01:37:34,566
¶ when you love someone ¶
1576
01:37:34,568 --> 01:37:38,436
¶ and you love them
with your heart ¶
1577
01:37:38,438 --> 01:37:45,676
¶ and it doesn't disappear
if you're apart ¶
1578
01:37:46,979 --> 01:37:49,879
¶ when you love someone ¶
1579
01:37:49,881 --> 01:37:55,183
¶ and you've done all you can do
¶ ¶ you've done all you can do ¶
1580
01:37:55,185 --> 01:37:57,185
¶ then you set them free ¶
1581
01:37:57,187 --> 01:38:01,322
¶ and if that love is true ¶
1582
01:38:01,324 --> 01:38:03,190
¶ oh, yeah ¶
1583
01:38:03,192 --> 01:38:08,228
¶ when you love someone ¶
1584
01:38:08,230 --> 01:38:15,367
¶ it will all
come back to you ¶
1585
01:38:18,338 --> 01:38:22,606
¶ nights I've wondered ¶
1586
01:38:22,608 --> 01:38:26,676
¶ was it too much
that we gave ¶
1587
01:38:26,678 --> 01:38:31,313
¶ if we'd given more could ¶
1588
01:38:31,315 --> 01:38:34,616
¶ we have both been saved ¶
1589
01:38:34,618 --> 01:38:38,886
¶ well, I guess
we crossed that line ¶
1590
01:38:38,888 --> 01:38:42,723
¶ never knowing
what was yours ¶
1591
01:38:42,725 --> 01:38:46,792
¶ and what was mine ¶
1592
01:38:46,794 --> 01:38:50,629
¶ when you love someone ¶
1593
01:38:50,631 --> 01:38:54,499
¶ then you love them
with your heart ¶
1594
01:38:54,501 --> 01:39:01,438
¶ and it doesn't disappear
if you're apart ¶
1595
01:39:01,440 --> 01:39:06,042
¶ when you love someone ¶
1596
01:39:06,044 --> 01:39:10,845
¶ and you've done all you can
do ¶ ¶ you've done all ¶
1597
01:39:10,847 --> 01:39:13,347
¶ and you set them free ¶
¶ you can ¶
1598
01:39:13,349 --> 01:39:18,818
¶ and if that love is true
oh, yes ¶
1599
01:39:18,820 --> 01:39:24,389
¶ when you love someone ¶
1600
01:39:24,391 --> 01:39:27,425
¶ it will all come back ¶
1601
01:39:27,427 --> 01:39:30,761
¶ to you ¶
1602
01:39:31,130 --> 01:39:35,398
¶ and through it all ¶
1603
01:39:35,400 --> 01:39:38,701
¶ I still have no regrets ¶
1604
01:39:38,703 --> 01:39:42,971
¶ just why must we ¶
¶ why must we ¶
1605
01:39:42,973 --> 01:39:48,175
¶ you never will forget ¶
¶ you never will ¶
1606
01:39:48,177 --> 01:39:52,144
¶ forget ¶
1607
01:39:53,413 --> 01:39:59,416
¶ when you love someone ¶
1608
01:39:59,418 --> 01:40:03,285
¶ and you've done
all you can do ¶
1609
01:40:03,287 --> 01:40:05,487
¶ then you set them free ¶
1610
01:40:05,489 --> 01:40:10,758
¶ if that love is true
oh, yeah ¶
1611
01:40:10,760 --> 01:40:16,696
¶ when you love someone ¶
¶ if you love someone ¶
1612
01:40:16,698 --> 01:40:20,432
¶ it will all come back ¶
1613
01:40:20,434 --> 01:40:21,114
¶ to you ¶
1614
01:40:27,507 --> 01:40:32,876
¶ oh, oh, oh ¶¶
1615
01:40:35,213 --> 01:40:39,582
you asked for it...
1616
01:41:03,574 --> 01:41:07,175
You got it.
122760
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.