All language subtitles for Landscapers4

♪ (EERIE MUSIC PLAYS) ♪

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

CHRISTOPHER EDWARDS:
It's just... I need you to...

promise me something,
Tabitha. Um...

You see, I-- I've-- I've done
something rather silly.

And it might sound bad,

might sound very bad even,
but it's not what it seems.

Not at all.
It's not what it seems,

and, um, just needs a little bit
of clearing up, that's all.

So that's why I need you
to promise me.

I need you to promise me
that you won't tell the police.

There you go. Can you
promise me that, Tabitha?

Uh, because I can't...

I can't let Susan down.
Do you understand?

She's very, uh, fragile, yes.

♪ (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYS) ♪

(CAR ENGINE REVS)

- (INDISTINCT CLAMOR)
- (CAMERA SHUTTERS CLICK)

- (CAR BRAKES SCREECH)
- (DOORS OPEN, CLOSE)

- SUSAN EDWARDS: Dear Chris...
- (DOOR OPENS)

I've managed to get hold
of a pen and some paper,

and so I thought
I would write you a letter.

There's so much I want to say
to you, Chris.

And maybe, one day,
we'll see each other again

- and I'll be able to do it.
- (DOOR OPENS)

Perhaps a little better
than I feel able to now.

You see, I never cared
about being shut out

from the real world...

(DOOR OPENS)

...because I never felt like
I was allowed

to arrive here
in the first place.

I'm not here anyway, am I?

So what's the difference?

What's the difference
between here and somewhere else

- in my head?
- (DOOR CLOSES)

SUSAN: But I see it now,
that it was different for you.

You had a place in that world.
And then you met me.

So I just wanted to say
that I understand.

I will love you always,
but I understand.

Yours, Susan.

♪ (OMINOUS CELLO MUSIC PLAYS) ♪

(WIND HOWLS)

♪ (MUSIC QUIETENS) ♪

(BREATHES SHAKILY)

♪ (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYS) ♪

- (BULLET CASINGS CLINK)
- (WIND HOWLS)

(HORSE NICKERS)

CHRISTOPHER: Wait there.
I'll be back in a minute.

SUSAN: What?
Chris, where are you going?

CHRISTOPHER: I'll be back
before you know it.

Just hold tight.

(WIND HOWLS)

(CRICKETS CHIRP)

(BREATHES SHAKILY)

(HORSE NICKERS)

- (THUDDING)
- (FOOTSTEPS RETREAT)

(EXHALES)

♪ (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS) ♪

BECKETT, QC:
...wrapped the near-naked bodies

of her parents in duvet covers
and buried them

in the rear garden
of their own house.

They then set about concealing
both the deaths and the burials

for the next 15 years.

But the story that Susan
and Christopher have concocted

is a fantasy.
It is not the truth.

Over the course of this trial,
we will demonstrate

that Susan
and Christopher Edwards

are not only audacious
and unrepentant liars,

they are cold-blooded killers

who, with forethought
and malice,

jointly agreed to murder
and conceal the bodies

of the helpless Patricia
and William Wycherley.

(BIRDS CHIRP)

(BIRDS CHIRP)

CHRISTOPHER: Thank you.

(CHRISTOPHER SLURPS)

(SIGHS)

♪ (OMINOUS MUSIC PLAYS) ♪

(DISTANT BELL RINGS)

- (INDISTINCT CLAMOR)
- (HORSE NEIGHS)

Morning, officers.

My stepson left this letter

on my porch earlier
this morning.

(WIND HOWLS)

DR. DICKSON: Decomposition
begins almost immediately,

and after three or four days
in a warm environment,

the corpse enters
a new phase of decay

which we refer to
as putrefaction or bloat.

The microorganisms
digesting body tissue

produce gases,
which cause the body to swell,

most visibly in the face,
where the eyes and tongue

are pushed forward,
often quite grotesquely.

And these gases
are extremely foul-smelling.

We've all had the misfortune
of smelling off chicken.

Now, imagine two chickens,
each the size of a human body.

In many cases,
it induces nausea and vomiting.

BECKETT: So what
are the chances, would you say,

of Christopher and Susan Edwards

entering a tiny house
where two adult corpses had lain

for nearly a week
in temperatures

of up to 23 degrees Celsius,

and not immediately
smelling them?

- DR. DICKSON: Nil.
- (HOOFBEATS)

- (HORSE NEIGHS)
- DEPUTY: Yah!

(HORSE NEIGHS)

BECKETT: Dr. Dickson,
in the Edwardses' interviews,

they repeatedly stated
that William Wycherley's limbs

and torso were stiff.
What would account for that?

DR. DICKSON: Rigor mortis.
It's biochemical changes

in a dead body that lead
to a stiffening of the muscles.

BECKETT:
Is rigor mortis permanent?

No. Without refrigeration,
it dissipates

approximately three days
after death.

So could
William Wycherley's body

have been stiff six days
after he was killed?

DR. DICKSON:
It's highly improbable.

Yet both Chris and Susan contend

that it was stiff
when they buried it.

DR. DICKSON: Their timescale
must be mistaken.

They must have buried William
within three days of death.

BECKETT:
When Mr. Edwards maintains

he was still in London?

DR. DICKSON: Yes.

♪ (OMINOUS MUSIC PLAYS) ♪

(BOTH GRUNT)

(BOTH RETCH)

(GROANS)

- (WIND HOWLS)
- (LEAVES RUSTLE)

♪ (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS) ♪

(HORSE NICKERS)

DEPUTY: Whoa! Whoa!

♪ (FOREBODING MUSIC PLAYS) ♪

RAJINDER GUPTA:
With a double-action revolver
like this,

the trigger action
has two phases.

The first part of your squeeze,

which takes
quite a bit of effort.

I think you can see the strain
on my finger.

What's happening is the hammer
is being pulled back

into firing position,
and at the same time,

the cylinder is advancing
a fresh bullet into the chamber.

- Requires quite
a deliberate effort...
- (GUN CLICKS)

...to discharge every bullet.

BECKETT: So not the kind
of trigger that you could pull

by mistake, then?

- GUPTA: Not easily, no.
- (GLASS SHATTERS)

GUPTA: It's a gun.
It's not a toy.

- (CRICKETS CHIRP)
- (FIRE CRACKLES)

GUPTA: And the other thing
to consider here is that the...

bullet strikes on the bones

are also extremely similar
in both victims,

and suggests
they were facing the gun.

BECKETT: So what would
your overall conclusion be,

taking all that into account?

GUPTA: My working assumption
would be that the same shooter

discharged all four bullets,

which is to say
that both William and Patricia

were most likely killed
by the same person,

and that he or she
was probably familiar

with this sort of weapon.

It's not like this is
the biggest gun in the world,

but it's still quite serious.
Do you know what I mean?

BECKETT:
No further questions, My Lady.

- (FIRE CRACKLES)
- (CRICKETS CHIRP)

♪ (MELANCHOLY MUSIC PLAYS) ♪

♪ (MUSIC FADES) ♪

CHRISTOPHER: I swear
by Almighty God

that the evidence I shall give

shall be the truth,
the whole truth,

and nothing but the truth.

BECKETT: What sort
of films did Gary Cooper

star in, Mr. Edwards?

He was a Hollywood actor
in the '40s and '50s,

- is that correct?
- CHRISTOPHER: And '60s, yes.

- BECKETT: And '60s, yes,
thank you for clarifying.
- (AUDIENCE LAUGHS)

CHRISTOPHER: He was, uh,
principally known for Westerns,

but he played
a wide range of characters,

romantic leads, comedies,
soldiers and, uh, of course,

he once played
the baseball player Lou Gehrig

- in Pride of the Yankees.
- (AUDIENCE CHUCKLING)

BECKETT:
But isn't it true, Chris,

that you and your wife loved
stories about the Wild West?

About gunslingers and outlaws?

CHRISTOPHER: Well, Susan
was the Gary Cooper fan.

And it was
all perfectly harmless.

BECKETT: Members of the jury,
please refer to document EL-96.

- (PAPERS RUSTLING)
- This is an invoice from 2009

for an authenticated
Gary Cooper letter

- costing 2,700 pounds.
- (AUDIENCE WHISPERS)

BECKETT: You spent 2,700 pounds
on a Gary Cooper letter

despite being on the verge
of bankruptcy?

It was a gift for Susan.

And we were not
on the verge of bankruptcy.

Mr. Edwards,
when you and your wife

were arrested
on your return from France,

you had nothing but a few coins
between you.

The only personal belongings
you had

were a few signed photos
and books.

You personally
have a correspondence

with the actor Gérard Depardieu.

- (AUDIENCE MURMURS)
- BECKETT: So it is preposterous

to suggest that you were
not a participant in this world

of overblown heroes
and Hollywood stars and guns.

CHRISTOPHER: Well, if you want
to get into the detail--

BECKETT: Forgive me,
just listen to my question--

Well, now you're interrupting
my answer.

BECKETT: You owned a gun
of the same caliber as the one

that shot your in-laws,
didn't you?

CHRISTOPHER: At one time,
I owned a revolver

that was capable of taking
.38 caliber cartridges, yes.

BECKETT: You had
.38 caliber cartridges?

Not in May 1998, I didn't.

I had neither cartridges
nor firearms. I had sold them.

BECKETT: Your wife hates guns,
doesn't she?

CHRISTOPHER: She certainly
doesn't like them.

BECKETT:
Well, you told the police

she was terrified of them

and she wouldn't even touch one
at the firing range.

CHRISTOPHER: That's correct.
She is generally very fragile.

I think that's another thing
that we haven't spent

- nearly enough time--
- BECKETT: What about you, Chris?

You like guns, don't you?

I'm interested in guns.

I am interested
in military history,

and guns are simply
a part of that.

BECKETT: Chris, could we just
clarify something for the jury?

You used to fire such weapons,
didn't you? Quite often.

CHRISTOPHER: Not often, no,

because the, uh-- the club
where I did my shooting

was in Earl's Court.

So from Dagenham,
I had to change trains twice,

so by the time I got home,
it was very late.

And then after Susan moved in,
it started to feel like I...

Well, it wasn't worth it
anymore, so I sold the guns

and surrendered
my firearms certificate,

and that was in September 1995.

BECKETT: But before you lived
with Susan,

you would've
happily made the journey?

- Yes.
- BECKETT: So what changed?

Well, Susan didn't like me being
away from home for too long

unless it was for work.

Or she didn't like me
being away from her,

perhaps I should say.

BECKETT: But you enjoyed
this hobby, didn't you?

CHRISTOPHER: Yes.

BECKETT: Did you feel like
it was your choice

to stop making that journey?
Or did Susan make you do it?

Um... It was-- It was mutual.

And when you buried
the bodies,

was that your choice?

Or did Susan make you do it?

- CHRISTOPHER: It was, um...
- BECKETT: Was it mutual?

CHRISTOPHER: Yes.

BECKETT: And when you phoned
your stepmother to tell her

about the bodies in the garden,
that was your choice, wasn't it?

That was a choice
you made independently,

without Susan.

And that is why
we are all here today, isn't it?

You must have been
in a great deal of pain

and discomfort to choose this

over what you could've had
in France, with Susan.

I made a choice to marry Susan

because I loved her.

And since then, I've been living
Susan's life with her.

My life didn't really
come into it.

It wasn't important anymore.

- (INSECTS BUZZ)
- (BIRDS CHIRP)

(BRANCHES SNAP)

(HORSE NICKERS)

(WHISPERS) Chris!

(GROANS, PANTS)

BECKETT: Would you
be able to show us, Chris,

how to fire a gun?
A .38, for example?

CHRISTOPHER:
Well, there are many styles.

My training
was in something called, uh,

precision target shooting.

You begin with a pistol
in front of you, unloaded.

Let's say the target is, um...
well, where My Ladyship is.

And you take your position,
bringing up the hand

to make sure you're pointing
naturally in that direction.

Take out the pistol, fit it
to the hand very precisely,

'cause you need to get
consistency of grip.

In the case of a revolver,
you put the cartridges into it

and then close it.

Take a couple of... (INHALES)

...gentle... (EXHALES)
...deep breaths.

♪ (OMINOUS MUSIC PLAYS) ♪

CHRISTOPHER: And then raise...

the pistol.

(AUDIENCE WHISPERS)

CHRISTOPHER:
Breathe out. (EXHALES)

Both eyes open.

And what you're looking for

is something they call
the "surprise break,"

which is when the shot goes off

without you
even thinking about it.

- (GUNSHOT)
- (JUDGE BLACKLOCK SCREAMS)

- (SCREAMING)
- (GUNSHOTS)

(HORSE NEIGHS)

(GUNSHOTS)

- Here, take this.
- What do I do with it?

- (SCREAMS)
- DEPUTY: Move forward!

- Just run, Susan! Go!
- No!

(GROANS)

CHRISTOPHER: I'll take care
of this. Just go now!

- No! Not without you.
- (GUNSHOTS)

CHRISTOPHER: Susan!
I'm begging you!

- Just do it!
- No! Not without you!

CHRISTOPHER: I'll find you.

Susan, I'm begging you.
Just run! I'll be all right.

- (CHRISTOPHER GRUNTS)
- (GUNSHOTS)

How did they know we'd be here?

- (GUNSHOTS)
- (CHRISTOPHER GRUNTS)

- Chris, how did they know?
- (PANTING) Susan...

- (GUNSHOTS)
- ♪ (SOMBER MUSIC PLAYS) ♪

Susan! What are you doing?

(GUNSHOT ECHOES)

(SUSAN GRUNTS)

(GUNSHOT)

(WIND HOWLS)

♪ (MUSIC FADES) ♪

♪ (GENTLE MUSIC PLAYS) ♪

BECKETT: Would you mind
speaking up, please,
Mrs. Edwards?

It's quite hard to hear
what you're saying.

SUSAN: I can't remember
clearly, um...

She had just killed my father,

and she was saying
those dreadful things to me,

and at some point, I just--

BECKETT:
You pulled the trigger?

SUSAN: Yes.

BECKETT: Louder please,
Mrs. Edwards.

Yes, I pulled the trigger.

BECKETT: But as we heard
from our expert,

such an action
would have required

two separate applications
of force.

Not hair-trigger,
but deliberate.

Enough to cock it
and fire the gun. Twice.

Bang. Bang. You did that?

SUSAN: I-- I don't know
exactly how I did it.

I spent 16 years trying
to forget what happened.

All I know is I was provoked.

BECKETT:
Did you even look to see

if you could help your father
when you saw he'd been shot?

SUSAN: No, I didn't want
to look at my father.

It-- It was frightening.

BECKETT: Perhaps you might
be able to tell me

a little about the brass casings

that you told the police
you saw on the floor

and that you disposed of
with the gun.

Um, there were casings--
um, blastings--

I-- I don't know. I saw them.

BECKETT: And what did you do
with the gun

- to dispose of it?
- I wrapped it up

along with the casings
that-- that I--

that were on the floor,
and I put it in a bag,

and then, um,
I took it into town,

and I put it
in an empty rubbish bin

so that other things
would be put on top.

BECKETT: A rubbish bin?
In the middle of the street?

SUSAN: Yeah, it was
the Tuesday after bank holiday.

BECKETT: Then you went directly
from the rubbish bin

to the bank,
which we've already discussed.

Where did you go after the bank?

SUSAN: No, I returned
to the house

after buying
some air fresheners.

BECKETT: Oh, you--
you bought air fresheners?

Yes, about 20 of them.
'Cause I-- I thought

the-- the bodies
might start to smell, and the--

and the house already stank
of smoke and nicotine,

and I hated that smell.

BECKETT: Isn't it interesting
that you've never mentioned

the air fresheners
to the police, and yet,

after Dr. Dickson's very vivid
description

of how a body decomposes,
suddenly you bought 20 of them?

SUSAN: I'd-- I forgot.
I didn't think it was important.

BECKETT: Did you know,
Mrs. Edwards,

that a revolver of this type
does not discharge casings?

- Did you know that?
- No.

BECKETT: Could you speak up
please, Mrs. Edwards,

- so we can all hear you.
- Sorry. No.

BECKETT: You didn't know.

But if you had fired the gun,
you would've seen

it produced no casings,
wouldn't you?

And you wouldn't have
made them up.

Isn't it a pity that
you didn't go over that detail

with your husband
before the arrest?

No, they-- I saw them.

BECKETT: They would not
have become part of your story.

Would they?

No, they-- they were there.
They were there on the floor.

BECKETT: And can you tell me
why you wrapped

your parents' bodies
in duvet covers, Mrs. Edwards?

SUSAN: To hide them, to make it
as if it hadn't happened.

'Cause I didn't want to
see them.

I-- I didn't want
to look at them.

BECKETT:
Is that also why you destroyed

the photographs, the letters,

the diaries, that you burned
outside your apartment

in France,
as we heard from the defense?

The intention there
isn't to preserve the memory

of your parents, is it?

That's you trying
to wipe your parents

off the face of the Earth.

It wasn't enough
that they were dead.

You had to burn all trace
that they had ever existed.

And they are not here
to defend themselves,

- are they, Mrs. Edwards?
- I don't--

BECKETT: The victims
of these terrible shootings?

- What would they have told us,
do you think?
- I wouldn't--

- BECKETT: What would be
their side of the story?
- Please.

BECKETT: You have painted them
in the worst possible light.

You were their daughter,
weren't you?

- Their only daughter.
- No, they-- they said
I was a mistake,

and they said they never wanted
to get married.

They wouldn't have
got married if my mom

hadn't got pregnant.
And they hated each other,

and they-- they didn't want me.

BECKETT: But they must have
loved you on some level.

- They were your parents.
- No, no,

'cause I'm impossible to love.

BECKETT: Mrs. Edwards?

I'm impossible to love.

That's what my mother would say
to me all the time, and--

and it's true.

I-- I know now that it's true.

(SNIFFLING)

Would you like to take a break,
Mrs. Edwards,

if you're having
a bit of a fragile moment?

- (AUDIENCE CHUCKLES)
- (SUSAN LAUGHS, SNIFFLES)

No. I'm not fragile.

I'm not fragile. I'm broken.
So you can't hurt me.

You can send me
to prison, and you can--

you can all laugh at me,

and you can make me
look like a piece of dirt

in front of all these people,
but... (INHALES)

I'm broken,
so you can't hurt me.

No one can hurt me anymore.

(SIGHS)

♪ (MELANCHOLY MUSIC PLAYS) ♪

(SUSAN SOBS)

♪ (MUSIC CONTINUES) ♪

(SUSAN GROANS)

(EXHALES SHARPLY)

Chris!

(SOBS)

Chris!

(SOBS)

(SCREAMS)

- (GUNSHOT)
- SUSAN: Chris!

(EXHALES HEAVILY)

- (GUNSHOT)
- (SOBS)

- (GUNSHOT)
- (GASPS)

(GUN CLICKS)

(CAR ENGINES RUMBLING)

- (INDISTINCT CHATTER)
- (DUCKS QUACKING)

Do you want to get
an ice cream cone?

- Yeah.
- MOTHER: An ice cream cone?

- You want ice cream, honey?
- CHILD: Yeah. Yeah.

MOTHER: Oh,
I'm gonna get you one.

(SIREN WAILING IN DISTANCE)

SUSAN: There's not much
we can do about it now,

- is there?
- DOUGLAS HYLTON: Hmm.

I did have one thought,
though...

that maybe we should've told
the barrister,

or I should have told you,
about Gérard Depardieu.

I've never told
anyone this before.

Are you sure you wanna tell me?

So, just after Chris's brother
passed away,

I wrote to Gérard Depardieu,
asking for a signed photo

'cause I thought
it would cheer Chris up.

And he didn't know anything
about films or France

when we-- when we got together,
but, uh, somehow,

he did know
about Gérard Depardieu.

And then eventually,
after a few weeks of waiting,

I decided I would
write back to Chris

pretending
to be Gérard Depardieu.

I practiced his signature
until I got it just right.

And I practiced his handwriting.

And I put in spelling mistakes
and things, you know,

so it looked it was written
by a French person.

(DOUGLAS LAUGHS)

SUSAN: Well, it worked.
He bought it.

And it made him so happy...

that I just kept doing it.

I kept writing to him pretending
I was Gérard Depardieu.

And then Chris
would write back, all excited.

But he never knew
that I was behind it all.

DOUGLAS: Uh, where was
he sending the letters, then?

Oh, I thought of all that too.
So the first one went to, um,

Apartment 16,
Rue Madam Zephirine,

75014 Paris.

And then there was
an address in Belgium.

And later on there was
an address in Russia.

But I just made them all up.

- Bye, love.
- Have a nice day!

(DOOR CLOSES)

SUSAN: 'Cause it didn't matter
where they ended up.

I always read his letters
before he sent them,

so I knew exactly how to reply.

And you might think that,
you know,

Chris would become suspicious.

All these letters
had London postmarks.

But they didn't. Because I had
a franking machine.

Just had to pick
a few well-chosen words

- in the right language,
and hey presto.
- DOUGLAS: Wow.

And you did all that
just to make Chris happy?

SUSAN: I think
even if I told him,

he wouldn't believe me.

"Good morning.
I'm Gérard Depardieu."

"No, you're not
Gérard Depardieu,

you're a librarian from
Harlesden, for crying out loud!"

(BOTH CHUCKLE SOFTLY)

At least, I don't think he knew.

- Hmm.
- It wouldn't have helped,
would it?

Mm-mm.

I get you, Susan.

I don't know
why I get you, but I get you.

And I find that story
really sweet,

that you'd do something
like that for him.

- But other people...
- Yeah.

...might not get it.

I just think
it wouldn't have played,

that's all. Because you're
on trial, anything weird,

anything that isn't just normal

- will make people assume--
- They'll think I'm bad news.

And I hate that, by the way.

Because... (CHUCKLES)

...I like that you're you.

Honestly, I...

I honestly think I will carry
this experience with me

for the rest
of my life, because...

You know what?
You're right, Susan.

I'm lucky.
It's not the same for me.

And you've helped me
to appreciate that.

Not because you're unlucky.

I-- I don't mean it
like that, though.

Or maybe I do mean it
like that. I-- I don't know.

I'm not saying that it has
to define you or that it's...

even the reason why we're here
right now in court, but...

they should have
looked after you, Susan.

They were your parents.
You were seven years old.

Do you know-- You know
how tall a seven-year-old is?

- This tall. This tall.
- (CHUCKLES)

(CLICKS TONGUE) So, uh...

I'm still learning.

Maybe I could have done
a better job for you.

I don't know.

I tried my best, I really did.

But I just wanted to make sure
that you understand that...

whatever happens today...

there's a lot that has happened
in your life that is not on you.

♪ (SOFT MUSIC PLAYS) ♪

(LAUGHS, SNIFFLES)

(INDISTINCT COURTROOM CHATTER)

JUDGE: But given that you left
home in your early twenties,

fifteen years
before the murders,

I cannot accept
that his conduct explains

your decision to kill them.

You thought your parents had

deprived you of an inheritance
that was rightfully yours.

I'm sure it was you,
Christopher Edwards,

who held the gun.

But I have no doubt
that you were acting together,

and I see no reason

to distinguish between you
on sentence.

(VACUUM CLEANER WHIRRING)

(PIGEONS COOING)

PAUL WILKIE:
Can you imagine ever, like...

actually murdering someone?

EMMA LANCING:
I can imagine it, yeah.

Don't think
I'd ever do it, though.

Why? You thinking of trying it?

- Bit of murder?
- (SCOFFS) Just trying to imagine

actually having a gun
and pointing it at your...

- LANCING: Your mom and dad.
- Yeah. So fucked up.

It's sad.

WILKIE: Yeah. I guess so.

- (PIGEONS COOING)
- (INDISTINCT CHATTER)

I threatened my dad once,

when he'd been at my mom.

I sat on it for a bit.

There's no point me trying
anything when he was pissed

'cause he'd just kick
the shit out of me.

But a few days later,
when he was watching telly,

I got an axe from the garage

and I went up to the sofa
and I said,

"If you touch Mom again,

I'll chop
your fucking head off."

WILKIE: Jesus. How old were you?

Twelve.

- Then what happened?
- LANCING: He left.

Shit, man.

Sorry.

LANCING:
Don't fucking hug me, you twat.

- WILKIE: Okay.
- That's not...

WILKIE: Just offering you a hug.
Sorry.

- Pervert.
- Fuck off.

Why would I try it on anyway
after a story like that?

- That's mad.
- When would you do it, then?

I don't know. I'd just ask you
out for a drink, whenever.

Right.

In what way?

WILKIE: Well, in that way
if you're asking.

- Are you asking?
- Yeah, all right, I'm asking.

No, I don't think so. Sorry.

What?

I would in theory.
But not in practice.

Maybe in like ten years.

Just before
my eggs start to dry up.

All right, well, shall we go
for a drink

just as friends, then?
Or as partners, even?

I need a bit more
than a drink, mate.

It's been quite
an intense few days.

- Oh. Well, like what?
- Like a fuck.

No, not with you.
Don't get any ideas.

You're a sensitive lad,
I can tell.

It'll get a bit complicated,
and then it'll just

go a bit Chris and Susan,
won't it?

WILKIE: Well, I'm not gonna
offer to kill your dad for ya.

I'm not asking you to.
We're going to the pub.

You're gonna be my wingman.

- Fucking wingman.
- Yeah.

- Fuck off. (LAUGHS)
- Come on. Chop, chop.

♪ (GENTLE MUSIC PLAYS) ♪

(DISTANT MUFFLED SHOUTING)

CHRISTOPHER: Dear Susan,
thank you for your letters,

which I have been
very grateful to receive.

I'm sorry
it's taken me so long to reply.

The first pen I received
was very scratchy,

and I wanted you to be able
to read what I was saying.

So I waited to be furnished
with the brand of implement

I originally asked for,

which I'm happy to say
is working much better.

In answer to your question
about Tabitha,

the truth is, Susan,

that I don't entirely
know why I did that.

But I do think that,
on some level, you're right.

I felt like I was struggling

and I needed to ask
somebody for help,

something that,
traditionally speaking,

I have not been very good at.

I think, though,
that you're wrong

about how I felt in other ways.

Because I never felt like
I had to leave

the real world behind
to be with you, Susan.

If anything,

you are the person who made
the world feel real to me.

It wasn't you
who made me feel trapped, Susan.

It was me.

♪ (WESTERN MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

In the movies,
there are the good guys

and there are the bad guys.

And I think
we will have to accept

that for most people,
we will always be the bad guys.

But we love each other, Susan.

And nobody
can take that away from us.

Yours forever and always,

Gérard Depardieu.

♪ (MUSIC SWELLS) ♪

♪ (ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

Ah, there you are!

If you'd like
to follow me, please.

Checks, please! Wardrobe checks.

(FILM CREW CHATTERING)

♪ (MUSIC CONTINUES) ♪

Stand by. Roll sound.

SOUND MIXER: Sound rolling!

DIRECTOR: All right, all right,
all right! Let's do this.

- Roll Camera.
- CAMERAMAN: Rolling.

DIRECTOR: Ladies and gents,
are you all set?

And action!

(PROJECTOR WHIRRING)

♪ (ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪

(PROJECTOR STOPS)

♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪

(WIND HOWLING)

♪ (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS) ♪

♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪