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1
00:00:07,880 --> 00:00:10,713
Calvin, this place is a real hot spot.
2
00:00:10,720 --> 00:00:13,100
They're known for their Ros� Lemonades.
3
00:00:14,340 --> 00:00:16,120
Did you order these for our wives
4
00:00:16,140 --> 00:00:19,125
or is the cast of Sex and
the City on the way?
5
00:00:19,130 --> 00:00:21,660
No, Calvin, these are for us.
6
00:00:21,680 --> 00:00:22,759
I had a rough day at work today.
7
00:00:22,760 --> 00:00:25,040
We are about to get
sorority girl wasted.
8
00:00:26,060 --> 00:00:29,001
Nobody's getting wasted
off this Kool-Aid.
9
00:00:29,010 --> 00:00:30,209
Whoa.
10
00:00:31,040 --> 00:00:33,220
Oh, my God.
11
00:00:33,240 --> 00:00:36,250
Take my keys. I, like, can't drive.
12
00:00:38,260 --> 00:00:39,417
Calvin, look.
13
00:00:39,420 --> 00:00:41,834
It's Jerome Bettis.
14
00:00:41,840 --> 00:00:43,792
He's an NFL legend, and
he's just sitting there
15
00:00:43,800 --> 00:00:45,875
drinking a Ros� Lemonade.
16
00:00:45,890 --> 00:00:47,553
Look at that.
17
00:00:47,560 --> 00:00:50,040
Stars, they're just like us.
18
00:00:50,880 --> 00:00:54,000
Dave, that is not Jerome Bettis.
19
00:00:55,920 --> 00:00:57,823
Oh, my God, I was right.
That's Jerome Bettis.
20
00:00:57,830 --> 00:00:59,125
I'll be right back.
21
00:01:01,190 --> 00:01:02,375
Jerome Bettis?
22
00:01:02,380 --> 00:01:04,084
My man!
23
00:01:04,090 --> 00:01:05,480
Hey, look. You don't know me,
24
00:01:05,500 --> 00:01:08,084
but I'm married to your
old friend, Tina Plummer.
25
00:01:08,085 --> 00:01:09,625
Lil' Tee Tee?
26
00:01:09,630 --> 00:01:12,292
Small world! How is she?
27
00:01:12,300 --> 00:01:14,243
Oh, well, she's Big Tee Tee now.
28
00:01:14,250 --> 00:01:16,540
Not... not big big.
29
00:01:16,560 --> 00:01:18,780
But old. But not old old.
30
00:01:20,920 --> 00:01:22,060
She's fine.
31
00:01:23,150 --> 00:01:24,209
Jerome?
32
00:01:24,210 --> 00:01:26,375
Dave Johnson. That's on the house.
33
00:01:26,380 --> 00:01:30,249
Looks like we, uh, all have
the same taste buds.
34
00:01:30,250 --> 00:01:33,000
Careful, these lemonades
sneak up on you.
35
00:01:33,010 --> 00:01:37,834
Yeah, but, uh, athletes like us
can handle our juice, right?
36
00:01:39,510 --> 00:01:42,000
How much you bench? 185?
37
00:01:43,230 --> 00:01:44,834
In the fifth grade.
38
00:01:46,300 --> 00:01:47,873
Hey, guys.
39
00:01:47,880 --> 00:01:49,119
Jerome?
40
00:01:49,120 --> 00:01:52,500
If it isn't Lil' Tee Tee from the LBC?
41
00:01:53,960 --> 00:01:55,060
Romy, Romy.
42
00:01:55,080 --> 00:01:56,749
Well, you know I'm
straight out of Compton.
43
00:01:56,750 --> 00:01:58,883
- You've seen the movie.
- Yeah, yeah.
44
00:01:58,890 --> 00:02:00,753
Calvin...
45
00:02:00,760 --> 00:02:04,150
Hey, Gemma. Dave Johnson.
Kalamazoo born and raised.
46
00:02:04,170 --> 00:02:06,410
Okay. I guess I'm driving.
47
00:02:06,430 --> 00:02:07,459
Oh, wow.
48
00:02:08,140 --> 00:02:09,790
So, uh, what are you doing here?
49
00:02:09,800 --> 00:02:11,301
Well, I'm in town on business.
50
00:02:11,310 --> 00:02:13,084
Uh, I've got a shoot over
at the Rose Bowl tomorrow.
51
00:02:13,085 --> 00:02:15,271
- Oh.
- Oh. You know, that's by our house.
52
00:02:15,280 --> 00:02:17,673
Tina and I would love for you
to come over for dinner.
53
00:02:17,680 --> 00:02:19,673
Oh, well, I'm sure Jerome is busy.
54
00:02:19,680 --> 00:02:22,400
Well, actually, I am
free tomorrow night.
55
00:02:22,420 --> 00:02:25,584
You know, room service...
it gets real old, real fast.
56
00:02:25,590 --> 00:02:27,040
- Ah.
- Well, there it is.
57
00:02:27,060 --> 00:02:29,330
Tomorrow night, it's going down!
58
00:02:30,380 --> 00:02:32,321
Looks like we're getting on The Bus!
59
00:02:32,330 --> 00:02:35,584
Next stop: Touchdown!
60
00:02:39,550 --> 00:02:42,631
Sorry, but my friend is
sorority girl wasted.
61
00:02:42,640 --> 00:02:44,820
Okay, that's enough for you, Kelly-Jo.
62
00:02:44,840 --> 00:02:46,163
Come on.
63
00:02:46,170 --> 00:02:50,360
- Synced & corrected by MementMori -
-- www.addic7ed.com --
64
00:02:54,640 --> 00:02:58,375
Ooh, Jerome was so cute in his Geico ad.
65
00:02:58,380 --> 00:03:02,083
Mm, back in the day, I would
have let him bundle my policies.
66
00:03:04,260 --> 00:03:06,159
Aw, why didn't you two date?
67
00:03:06,160 --> 00:03:07,293
Oh, we did.
68
00:03:08,920 --> 00:03:12,863
Every summer in high school,
I would visit my granny in Detroit.
69
00:03:12,870 --> 00:03:15,380
So I met Jerome in my senior year,
70
00:03:15,400 --> 00:03:18,542
and, uh, you know, we had a
cute little teenage romance.
71
00:03:18,550 --> 00:03:20,584
Aw. Does Calvin know?
72
00:03:20,590 --> 00:03:23,420
No. I would've told him,
but when we started dating,
73
00:03:23,440 --> 00:03:26,542
he had a "Don't Ask, Leave
the Past in the Past" rule.
74
00:03:26,550 --> 00:03:28,181
Ah.
75
00:03:28,190 --> 00:03:29,683
When we started dating,
76
00:03:29,690 --> 00:03:32,460
Dave had a "Do Ask, Do Tell" rule.
77
00:03:32,480 --> 00:03:35,084
He even told me his first
crush was Nancy Reagan.
78
00:03:36,510 --> 00:03:38,042
And yet you still married him.
79
00:03:38,050 --> 00:03:40,293
Mm-hmm.
80
00:03:40,300 --> 00:03:43,180
Eventually, though, his
honesty policy grew on me.
81
00:03:43,200 --> 00:03:45,040
He's the ultimate open book.
82
00:03:45,060 --> 00:03:47,020
He'll tell anybody anything.
83
00:03:47,030 --> 00:03:48,042
- Hmm.
- Watch.
84
00:03:48,043 --> 00:03:49,320
Dave?
85
00:03:50,440 --> 00:03:51,709
Yes, sweetie?
86
00:03:51,710 --> 00:03:53,334
How many people have you slept with?
87
00:03:53,340 --> 00:03:54,709
- Six.
- Three.
88
00:03:55,940 --> 00:03:58,330
Six? You told me it was three.
89
00:03:58,340 --> 00:03:59,500
Did I?
90
00:04:00,260 --> 00:04:02,500
Wait, did you lie about your number?
91
00:04:02,510 --> 00:04:04,343
Hmm.
92
00:04:04,350 --> 00:04:05,750
Did I?
93
00:04:08,210 --> 00:04:09,630
That's the same voice you had
94
00:04:09,650 --> 00:04:12,699
when I asked you if you
dinged my car last week.
95
00:04:12,700 --> 00:04:14,084
Is it?
96
00:04:14,090 --> 00:04:16,210
Yes, it is.
97
00:04:20,290 --> 00:04:22,120
All right, you got it, little man?
98
00:04:22,130 --> 00:04:23,292
Yeah, I got it.
99
00:04:23,300 --> 00:04:25,703
- I said, you got it, little man?
- Yeah, I got it!
100
00:04:25,720 --> 00:04:27,703
All right. One, two, three.
101
00:04:27,710 --> 00:04:29,625
Yeah, I don't got it.
102
00:04:29,630 --> 00:04:30,875
D'oh!
103
00:04:32,210 --> 00:04:33,909
Hey, Marty, how come you're
not helping us get ready
104
00:04:33,910 --> 00:04:35,960
- for Poker Night?
- Well, I am, man.
105
00:04:35,980 --> 00:04:37,460
I'm busy making snacks.
106
00:04:37,480 --> 00:04:40,000
Uh, yeah, that'll be three large pizzas.
107
00:04:40,010 --> 00:04:41,540
Ooh, and some mozzarella sticks.
108
00:04:41,560 --> 00:04:44,209
Okay, yeah, and-and two
dozen mozzarella sticks.
109
00:04:44,210 --> 00:04:46,000
Yeah, Malcolm, give me your debit card.
110
00:04:46,010 --> 00:04:47,459
What?
111
00:04:47,460 --> 00:04:49,375
I didn't budget for no
damn mozzarella sticks.
112
00:04:51,290 --> 00:04:53,260
And yet you got enough
money in your budget
113
00:04:53,280 --> 00:04:54,834
for a Captain Kirk Snuggie.
114
00:04:54,840 --> 00:04:56,610
It was a collector's edition.
115
00:04:56,620 --> 00:04:57,667
That's an investment.
116
00:04:59,380 --> 00:05:01,930
Man, playing poker is
so much more funner
117
00:05:01,950 --> 00:05:03,667
than doing my English homework.
118
00:05:03,670 --> 00:05:05,375
More funner?
119
00:05:05,380 --> 00:05:06,799
Yeah, you might want
to try "more harder"
120
00:05:06,800 --> 00:05:08,090
on that homework, brother.
121
00:05:09,560 --> 00:05:11,110
And, yeah, uh, listen.
122
00:05:11,130 --> 00:05:14,860
We appreciate you helping us set
up, but tonight's for adults only.
123
00:05:14,880 --> 00:05:16,000
I'm sorry, Grover.
124
00:05:16,010 --> 00:05:17,560
Aw, come on.
125
00:05:17,580 --> 00:05:19,625
We got mozzarella sticks coming.
126
00:05:19,630 --> 00:05:22,000
Ooh. Hey, you know what?
I'll save you some.
127
00:05:22,010 --> 00:05:23,453
Fine.
128
00:05:23,460 --> 00:05:26,084
Didn't want to come to your
awesome party anyway.
129
00:05:29,660 --> 00:05:32,620
Look, oh, well. These poker nights
can get kind of wild, Marty.
130
00:05:32,640 --> 00:05:34,471
It's no place for kids.
131
00:05:34,480 --> 00:05:36,280
And maybe not for you, either.
132
00:05:36,300 --> 00:05:38,334
Yeah. Last time, you lost $100.
133
00:05:38,340 --> 00:05:40,579
Yeah, but this time, I'm prepared.
134
00:05:40,580 --> 00:05:41,940
I've created a foolproof system
135
00:05:41,960 --> 00:05:44,040
that calculates the odds by
running every permutation
136
00:05:44,060 --> 00:05:48,251
of any given hand to create
an advantage in my favor.
137
00:05:48,260 --> 00:05:49,783
So, you're counting cards?
138
00:05:49,790 --> 00:05:51,375
Yeah, basically.
139
00:05:53,890 --> 00:05:55,100
It's, it's...
140
00:05:55,120 --> 00:05:56,584
- Hey, dude, hey.
- What's up, man?
141
00:05:56,590 --> 00:05:57,609
- Good morning.
- Hey! Sidney!
142
00:05:57,610 --> 00:05:59,740
Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo.
143
00:05:59,760 --> 00:06:01,040
Hey, this is my cousin, Whitney.
144
00:06:01,050 --> 00:06:02,563
She likes poker, so I brought her.
145
00:06:02,570 --> 00:06:04,120
No, I brought you.
146
00:06:04,140 --> 00:06:05,209
I'm the one with the car.
147
00:06:05,210 --> 00:06:06,500
Oh.
148
00:06:06,510 --> 00:06:08,042
Why are you always
telling family business?
149
00:06:08,043 --> 00:06:09,209
Why you always broke?
150
00:06:11,130 --> 00:06:12,584
Okay.
151
00:06:12,590 --> 00:06:14,200
Well, I got to warn you, Whitney,
152
00:06:14,220 --> 00:06:15,990
I have a math-based system that tells me
153
00:06:16,000 --> 00:06:17,240
there's an 86% chance
154
00:06:17,260 --> 00:06:19,084
that I'm going to take
93% of your money.
155
00:06:19,090 --> 00:06:21,792
Well, I have a system that
tells me you're 100% corny.
156
00:06:21,800 --> 00:06:23,667
- What?
- It's called my eyes.
157
00:06:25,670 --> 00:06:28,079
I like her. Yeah, she can stay.
158
00:06:31,840 --> 00:06:33,681
Hey. Oh, yeah.
159
00:06:33,690 --> 00:06:34,843
Bam!
160
00:06:34,850 --> 00:06:37,334
1984 Pasadena High School.
161
00:06:37,340 --> 00:06:39,334
First Team All Conference.
162
00:06:39,340 --> 00:06:41,321
Jerome's gonna feel a
lot more comfortable
163
00:06:41,330 --> 00:06:43,792
knowing he's not the
only baller in the house.
164
00:06:45,630 --> 00:06:49,519
Well, I guess everyone can
reach around your trophy
165
00:06:49,520 --> 00:06:51,709
to get to my artichoke dip.
166
00:06:51,710 --> 00:06:56,280
Or we can just move your
artichoke dip altogether.
167
00:06:59,960 --> 00:07:03,110
Uh, guys, so excited to take
a picture with The Bus
168
00:07:03,120 --> 00:07:04,792
I changed three times.
169
00:07:04,800 --> 00:07:07,560
Huh. Are you sure it wasn't six times?
170
00:07:07,580 --> 00:07:08,910
Hmm.
171
00:07:08,920 --> 00:07:10,917
Was it?
172
00:07:12,810 --> 00:07:14,375
Romy! Welcome.
173
00:07:14,380 --> 00:07:15,760
- My man!
- My man!
174
00:07:15,780 --> 00:07:17,753
- My man!
- My man!
175
00:07:17,770 --> 00:07:18,879
- My mickety, mickety...
- All right,
176
00:07:18,880 --> 00:07:20,319
who-who wants drinks?
177
00:07:20,320 --> 00:07:21,334
My man?
178
00:07:24,070 --> 00:07:25,625
Do I smell artichoke dip?
179
00:07:25,630 --> 00:07:27,125
My man!
180
00:07:33,460 --> 00:07:35,450
Seven.
181
00:07:37,000 --> 00:07:38,343
Just quit, Marty.
182
00:07:38,350 --> 00:07:40,113
You've already lost
all your poker money.
183
00:07:40,120 --> 00:07:41,413
Do not lose your pride.
184
00:07:41,420 --> 00:07:43,100
What? I... No! I can't be losing.
185
00:07:43,110 --> 00:07:44,542
I am a damn rocket scientist!
186
00:07:45,390 --> 00:07:47,583
Look, Marty, there's
no shame in quitting.
187
00:07:47,590 --> 00:07:50,083
I do it with jobs all the time.
188
00:07:50,090 --> 00:07:53,159
I've won five hands.
And you've won zero.
189
00:07:53,160 --> 00:07:54,840
I'm no rocket scientist,
190
00:07:54,860 --> 00:07:56,820
but it sounds like you
need to call Houston.
191
00:07:56,840 --> 00:07:58,200
'Cause you got a problem.
192
00:07:59,270 --> 00:08:00,533
Okay.
193
00:08:00,540 --> 00:08:03,020
I'll match all your chips.
194
00:08:03,040 --> 00:08:04,084
My debit card.
195
00:08:04,090 --> 00:08:05,625
Whoa, whoa, wait. Marty!
196
00:08:05,630 --> 00:08:07,249
We haven't paid rent yet.
What about your budget?
197
00:08:07,250 --> 00:08:08,542
Mind your own budget!
198
00:08:09,730 --> 00:08:11,360
I'm also putting in my Apple Watch.
199
00:08:11,375 --> 00:08:15,542
And I raise you my last chip.
200
00:08:15,550 --> 00:08:17,040
Okay.
201
00:08:18,340 --> 00:08:19,580
I call.
202
00:08:22,420 --> 00:08:24,875
Full house! King, seven.
203
00:08:24,880 --> 00:08:26,060
Math wins again.
204
00:08:26,080 --> 00:08:28,042
Or, perhaps, for the first time.
205
00:08:28,050 --> 00:08:29,542
Uh, not so fast.
206
00:08:29,550 --> 00:08:32,749
According to my calculations,
and this equation,
207
00:08:32,750 --> 00:08:34,631
"X" equals "you lose."
208
00:08:34,640 --> 00:08:37,363
- What?
- Four queens.
209
00:08:37,370 --> 00:08:39,720
Oh...
210
00:08:39,740 --> 00:08:43,750
How is this possible, that I'm losing
to somebody related to Trey?
211
00:08:43,760 --> 00:08:46,250
But, honestly,
I'm surprised too. That's...
212
00:08:46,260 --> 00:08:47,542
Here you go, cuz.
213
00:08:47,550 --> 00:08:49,660
Thank you. Oh, look.
214
00:08:49,670 --> 00:08:52,080
Marty, my new Apple Watch says
it's time for you to breathe.
215
00:08:53,380 --> 00:08:54,750
My mama gave me that watch.
216
00:08:58,510 --> 00:09:02,100
All right. I know they always
called you The Bus,
217
00:09:02,120 --> 00:09:03,453
but back in the day,
218
00:09:03,460 --> 00:09:05,523
they called me The Truck
219
00:09:05,530 --> 00:09:07,863
'cause I used to haul
ass into the end zone.
220
00:09:07,870 --> 00:09:10,084
- Ha! My man!
- My man.
221
00:09:10,090 --> 00:09:11,163
Ha-ha. My man!
222
00:09:11,170 --> 00:09:13,050
My m... Dave, no.
223
00:09:17,370 --> 00:09:20,580
Hey, we're outta beer
and I'm outta money.
224
00:09:20,600 --> 00:09:23,584
And Mom wasn't lying about
knowing Jerome Bettis.
225
00:09:23,590 --> 00:09:24,667
What?
226
00:09:24,670 --> 00:09:26,739
Yeah, well, Jerome and I go way back
227
00:09:26,740 --> 00:09:29,250
to a time when Amazon was just a jungle.
228
00:09:31,010 --> 00:09:33,084
Jerome, what was my mama like as a kid?
229
00:09:33,090 --> 00:09:35,300
Lil' Tee Tee? She was a lot of fun.
230
00:09:35,320 --> 00:09:37,123
She was the best skater in our crew.
231
00:09:37,130 --> 00:09:38,361
Except for me, of course.
232
00:09:38,370 --> 00:09:42,440
Man, please. You know, it's funny
how you were selling Geico,
233
00:09:42,470 --> 00:09:44,300
but whenever you got on wheels,
234
00:09:44,320 --> 00:09:45,625
your ass would crash.
235
00:09:46,670 --> 00:09:48,829
You always did talk a lot of trash.
236
00:09:48,830 --> 00:09:50,089
Yeah, sure.
237
00:09:50,090 --> 00:09:53,200
And I remember you loved the movies.
238
00:09:53,220 --> 00:09:56,090
That's why we spent a lot of
time at the local drive-in.
239
00:09:57,100 --> 00:09:58,470
Drive-in?
240
00:09:58,490 --> 00:10:01,651
That requires a car.
With you two alone in it.
241
00:10:01,660 --> 00:10:03,860
Yeah. And-and my car was so small,
242
00:10:03,880 --> 00:10:06,200
she was practically sitting on my lap.
243
00:10:07,670 --> 00:10:09,042
E-Excuse me?
244
00:10:09,050 --> 00:10:11,893
Aw, it was like a,
like a summer romance.
245
00:10:11,900 --> 00:10:13,363
Like... like Danny and Sandy.
246
00:10:13,370 --> 00:10:14,792
- Romance?
- Well...
247
00:10:14,800 --> 00:10:17,120
- Grease! We saw that together.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
248
00:10:17,140 --> 00:10:21,000
Oh, and Saturday Night Fever.
It was a-a Travolta double feature.
249
00:10:21,010 --> 00:10:22,233
Double feature?
250
00:10:22,240 --> 00:10:24,209
That's a awful lot of lap sitting.
251
00:10:25,670 --> 00:10:28,499
Wait a minute. Y... You guys
weren't a couple, were you?
252
00:10:28,500 --> 00:10:29,958
No, no, no, no, no.
It was nothing like that.
253
00:10:29,959 --> 00:10:32,413
Uh, no, it was just a teenage fling.
254
00:10:32,420 --> 00:10:33,700
Fling?
255
00:10:35,100 --> 00:10:36,130
My woman...
256
00:10:37,459 --> 00:10:39,042
... and my man?
257
00:10:40,550 --> 00:10:42,625
Oh. Oh, man.
258
00:10:49,060 --> 00:10:51,381
- This was fun.
- Good seeing you, Romy.
259
00:10:51,390 --> 00:10:52,459
Next time I'm in town,
260
00:10:52,460 --> 00:10:54,013
I'm taking you guys to dinner.
261
00:10:54,020 --> 00:10:55,833
- See you, Tee Tee.
- All right, now.
262
00:10:55,834 --> 00:10:57,000
Okay.
263
00:10:57,920 --> 00:10:59,660
I'm sure you've got to get going, man.
264
00:10:59,670 --> 00:11:01,900
Got one of those Hall of
Fame meetings to get to.
265
00:11:01,920 --> 00:11:04,749
And get that yellow jacket
out of the dry cleaners, okay?
266
00:11:04,750 --> 00:11:07,140
So drive safe, my man. All right?
267
00:11:12,550 --> 00:11:15,917
- Well, that was embarrassing.
- Well, yes, it was.
268
00:11:15,920 --> 00:11:17,709
You embarrassed the
hell out of me, Tina.
269
00:11:17,710 --> 00:11:19,792
I embarrassed you?
270
00:11:19,800 --> 00:11:22,369
You were the one acting crazy tonight.
271
00:11:22,370 --> 00:11:23,399
Well, you would have, too,
272
00:11:23,400 --> 00:11:25,178
if you would've learned
what I just learned.
273
00:11:25,180 --> 00:11:26,792
I mean, who else did you date
274
00:11:26,800 --> 00:11:28,363
that you forgot to mention?
275
00:11:28,370 --> 00:11:29,663
Barack Obama?
276
00:11:29,670 --> 00:11:32,633
Nelson Mandela? Ja Rule?
277
00:11:32,640 --> 00:11:34,740
I didn't forget to mention anything.
278
00:11:34,760 --> 00:11:36,840
I was just following your "Don't Ask,
279
00:11:36,860 --> 00:11:39,743
Leave the Past in the Past" rule.
280
00:11:39,750 --> 00:11:41,643
Well, if your past is
all up in your house
281
00:11:41,650 --> 00:11:43,673
eating your food,
then it's in the present.
282
00:11:43,680 --> 00:11:47,792
You think it's easy for me to hear
about you dating a famous athlete?
283
00:11:47,800 --> 00:11:51,790
You were the one who came
up with the "Don't Ask" rule.
284
00:11:51,800 --> 00:11:53,780
Look, and don't think I didn't know
285
00:11:53,790 --> 00:11:56,334
you used to be Mr. Player Player.
286
00:11:58,630 --> 00:12:01,080
But did I make a big deal out of it?
287
00:12:01,100 --> 00:12:02,375
No, I did not.
288
00:12:02,380 --> 00:12:05,020
Well, I didn't make a big deal
out of your past, either, Tina,
289
00:12:05,040 --> 00:12:07,292
mainly because I didn't
think you had one.
290
00:12:09,900 --> 00:12:11,520
Look at all this, Calvin.
291
00:12:13,960 --> 00:12:16,320
Of course I had a past!
292
00:12:16,340 --> 00:12:18,600
What, you want me to start naming names?
293
00:12:18,620 --> 00:12:19,873
- Okay, let me just...
- Uh-uh.
294
00:12:19,874 --> 00:12:21,209
No, no, no. See, now
you're going too far.
295
00:12:21,210 --> 00:12:22,670
No, you're the one tripping
296
00:12:22,690 --> 00:12:25,583
over somebody that I went to a
movie with over 30 years ago,
297
00:12:25,590 --> 00:12:27,600
who you invited to dinner
298
00:12:27,610 --> 00:12:29,591
and then acted like a child.
299
00:12:29,600 --> 00:12:30,700
- A child?
- Yes.
300
00:12:30,710 --> 00:12:33,167
You know, nah, nah. Don't
try to put this on me, Tina.
301
00:12:33,170 --> 00:12:35,500
You know what, Calvin?
I don't have time for this.
302
00:12:35,510 --> 00:12:37,292
Well, I didn't have time for it first.
303
00:12:37,300 --> 00:12:38,542
- Well, good!
- Good!
304
00:12:38,550 --> 00:12:40,010
- Good!
- Good!
305
00:12:41,340 --> 00:12:42,750
And we cancelling Geico!
306
00:12:51,170 --> 00:12:54,334
I brought you the traditional
husband peace offering.
307
00:12:54,340 --> 00:12:56,960
Traditionally, that's jewelry.
308
00:12:58,840 --> 00:13:00,370
But I'll take the pie anyway.
309
00:13:03,780 --> 00:13:05,893
Look...
310
00:13:05,900 --> 00:13:08,499
I know it was stupid
to lie about my number.
311
00:13:08,500 --> 00:13:09,920
We had just started dating,
312
00:13:09,940 --> 00:13:11,580
and you were a little weirded out
313
00:13:11,600 --> 00:13:13,440
about my "open book" policy.
314
00:13:13,460 --> 00:13:15,360
You know, whenever
we would open my book,
315
00:13:15,380 --> 00:13:17,280
you wanted to burn all the pages.
316
00:13:18,260 --> 00:13:22,292
No, I just really liked
the chapters about us.
317
00:13:22,300 --> 00:13:24,210
Exactly. And I didn't want to hurt you
318
00:13:24,230 --> 00:13:27,119
with my typical Dave "oversharing."
319
00:13:27,120 --> 00:13:29,160
Especially when it was
about all the women
320
00:13:29,180 --> 00:13:33,300
who turned me into, well,
the sexual animal I am today.
321
00:13:37,550 --> 00:13:39,300
An example of oversharing.
322
00:13:41,820 --> 00:13:45,780
I admit, I used to get
uncomfortable about your past.
323
00:13:45,800 --> 00:13:47,660
But I'm much more secure now
324
00:13:47,680 --> 00:13:50,240
because of our open-book policy.
325
00:13:50,260 --> 00:13:52,030
I'm just mad that you lied.
326
00:13:53,330 --> 00:13:56,417
I get that. And... and I'm sorry.
327
00:13:56,420 --> 00:13:57,959
Thank you.
328
00:13:57,960 --> 00:13:59,520
And while we're here,
329
00:13:59,530 --> 00:14:03,210
you know, I did... to be totally
transparent... remember
330
00:14:03,220 --> 00:14:05,051
a seventh girl.
331
00:14:05,060 --> 00:14:06,959
She's the one who taught me to...
332
00:14:06,960 --> 00:14:08,667
Stop talking.
333
00:14:12,020 --> 00:14:15,861
Well, I should also be
totally transparent.
334
00:14:15,870 --> 00:14:18,460
I might've spent some time in the Ozarks
335
00:14:18,480 --> 00:14:21,320
with Justin Timberlake.
336
00:14:22,740 --> 00:14:26,625
Let's just say we were, uh, NSYNC.
337
00:14:31,460 --> 00:14:34,100
Okay.
338
00:14:34,120 --> 00:14:35,250
That's funny!
339
00:14:38,760 --> 00:14:40,520
Wait, for real? Justin?
340
00:14:42,080 --> 00:14:44,292
Gemma, I gotta know.
He's all over my playlist.
341
00:14:52,740 --> 00:14:54,230
- Ah...
- Uh...
342
00:14:54,240 --> 00:14:55,667
Hey, Dad.
343
00:14:55,670 --> 00:14:57,201
Did I catch you at a bad time?
344
00:14:57,210 --> 00:14:59,203
No, son. Never better.
345
00:14:59,210 --> 00:15:00,540
Good.
346
00:15:00,560 --> 00:15:01,820
Uh...
347
00:15:01,840 --> 00:15:02,880
I was a little embarrassed
348
00:15:02,900 --> 00:15:04,375
to bring this up in front
of Jerome Bettis, but...
349
00:15:04,376 --> 00:15:06,243
Don't say that name in that house.
350
00:15:06,250 --> 00:15:08,913
Don't say that name on this porch.
351
00:15:08,920 --> 00:15:10,600
Right.
352
00:15:10,620 --> 00:15:13,720
Well, see, I-I created this poker system
353
00:15:13,740 --> 00:15:15,413
based on math, that, uh...
354
00:15:15,420 --> 00:15:17,417
All right. How much did you lose?
355
00:15:17,420 --> 00:15:20,053
Let's just say I'd have to cash
out some Bitcoin to make rent.
356
00:15:20,060 --> 00:15:22,375
Oh, no, not your Bitcoin.
357
00:15:22,380 --> 00:15:24,667
I don't care. Pay me.
358
00:15:27,190 --> 00:15:28,680
Okay, all right.
359
00:15:28,700 --> 00:15:30,500
Quit playing. I got your back, man.
360
00:15:30,510 --> 00:15:31,875
Oh. Thanks, Dad.
361
00:15:31,880 --> 00:15:33,620
But you're gonna have
to clean up this yard,
362
00:15:33,650 --> 00:15:35,959
wax the cars and scrape off the grill.
363
00:15:35,960 --> 00:15:37,520
Okay, all right.
364
00:15:37,540 --> 00:15:39,103
Fair enough. I respect that.
365
00:15:39,110 --> 00:15:41,411
You know, I'm glad you're my dad, man.
366
00:15:41,420 --> 00:15:43,690
Even though I probably could
have been a famous athlete
367
00:15:43,700 --> 00:15:45,720
if Jerome Bettis had been my father.
368
00:15:47,180 --> 00:15:48,953
Me, too, son.
369
00:15:48,960 --> 00:15:50,860
Even though I could have been retired
370
00:15:50,880 --> 00:15:53,200
if Patrick Mahomes was my son.
371
00:15:56,990 --> 00:15:59,663
Hey, Calvin, I'm returning your pie tin.
372
00:15:59,670 --> 00:16:01,163
How are you and Tina doing?
373
00:16:01,170 --> 00:16:02,499
I don't know.
374
00:16:02,500 --> 00:16:04,440
Ask Romy Rome.
375
00:16:05,340 --> 00:16:07,082
So, you're still mad at her?
376
00:16:07,083 --> 00:16:09,740
Look, you just don't get
over something like that.
377
00:16:09,760 --> 00:16:11,375
The man is in the Hall of Fame.
378
00:16:11,380 --> 00:16:13,550
Plus, I've napped in his jersey.
379
00:16:16,770 --> 00:16:18,709
Okay, so you're really mad.
380
00:16:20,600 --> 00:16:22,380
But you know what, you're right.
381
00:16:22,390 --> 00:16:24,821
In fact, I'm still mad at Dave.
382
00:16:24,830 --> 00:16:27,140
Gemma, come on.
383
00:16:27,170 --> 00:16:29,323
Is the number really that important?
384
00:16:29,330 --> 00:16:32,125
Yes! I'm not sure I
can ever forgive him.
385
00:16:33,280 --> 00:16:34,540
Okay. You know what?
386
00:16:34,560 --> 00:16:37,093
This sounds a little extreme, so...
387
00:16:37,100 --> 00:16:38,792
tell me what's really going on.
388
00:16:38,800 --> 00:16:41,209
I can't stop thinking
about those other women.
389
00:16:41,210 --> 00:16:43,220
Well, that's why I created
390
00:16:43,240 --> 00:16:45,660
"Don't Ask, Leave Your
Past in the Past."
391
00:16:45,680 --> 00:16:49,249
Also known as "Don't
Ask or That's Yo Ass."
392
00:16:51,000 --> 00:16:53,313
I mean, I was his eighth choice.
393
00:16:53,320 --> 00:16:55,880
I bet he'd love to leave
me for number seven.
394
00:16:55,900 --> 00:16:58,060
She's probably some doctor type
395
00:16:58,080 --> 00:17:01,883
who's really good at full-body exams...
396
00:17:01,890 --> 00:17:04,123
if you know what I mean.
397
00:17:05,020 --> 00:17:06,260
I do.
398
00:17:07,090 --> 00:17:09,293
But that's not Dave.
399
00:17:09,300 --> 00:17:13,510
Dave is the guy that crocheted
us all mittens for Christmas.
400
00:17:15,690 --> 00:17:18,173
Look, Dave married you.
401
00:17:18,180 --> 00:17:19,973
He loves you.
402
00:17:19,980 --> 00:17:21,480
Those other women don't matter.
403
00:17:21,500 --> 00:17:23,749
You have nothing to be insecure about.
404
00:17:23,750 --> 00:17:26,000
Do you really believe that?
405
00:17:26,020 --> 00:17:27,334
You're damn right I do.
406
00:17:28,380 --> 00:17:30,410
Then act like it.
407
00:17:33,260 --> 00:17:35,292
Ooh, Mic drop.
408
00:17:37,500 --> 00:17:39,480
Oh, my God, I cracked my screen.
409
00:17:42,460 --> 00:17:44,660
- Hey, babe.
- I don't want to talk.
410
00:17:45,670 --> 00:17:49,250
Look, I was thinking that
I might owe you an apology.
411
00:17:50,420 --> 00:17:51,880
Keep talking.
412
00:17:53,060 --> 00:17:56,241
I'm sorry that I got jealous.
413
00:17:58,050 --> 00:17:59,543
What were you thinking?
414
00:17:59,550 --> 00:18:01,113
I don't know.
415
00:18:01,120 --> 00:18:05,480
I guess I wasn't. I just...
I got a little insecure that...
416
00:18:05,500 --> 00:18:09,329
I thought maybe you thought
you made the wrong choice.
417
00:18:09,330 --> 00:18:12,623
Wrong choice? I chose The Truck.
418
00:18:12,630 --> 00:18:14,293
The Truck is built for anything.
419
00:18:14,300 --> 00:18:16,960
Yeah, but he's The Bus.
420
00:18:16,980 --> 00:18:18,875
You could have been Mrs. Bus.
421
00:18:19,920 --> 00:18:21,200
You know?
422
00:18:21,210 --> 00:18:22,933
Living the good life.
423
00:18:22,940 --> 00:18:24,420
Front-row seats to the game,
424
00:18:24,440 --> 00:18:27,220
private jets, flashy jewelry.
425
00:18:29,900 --> 00:18:31,700
Calvin, what are you talking about?
426
00:18:31,720 --> 00:18:33,543
I am living my best life.
427
00:18:33,550 --> 00:18:36,460
Yeah, but being married to a
guy that owns a body shop
428
00:18:36,480 --> 00:18:39,460
doesn't get you on The Real
Housewives of Pittsburgh.
429
00:18:40,270 --> 00:18:43,953
Calvin, I have had lots of
chances at living that life,
430
00:18:43,960 --> 00:18:46,209
but I chose you and
the life you offered.
431
00:18:47,840 --> 00:18:50,640
What do you mean you
had "lots of chances"?
432
00:18:52,360 --> 00:18:55,130
Oh, you thought you were
playing about Ja Rule.
433
00:18:55,140 --> 00:18:56,449
What? Tina...
434
00:18:56,450 --> 00:18:58,334
I-I'm just playing, I'm just playing.
435
00:19:00,130 --> 00:19:01,903
Calvin...
436
00:19:01,910 --> 00:19:05,375
You know, nothing can replace
the chemistry we have.
437
00:19:05,380 --> 00:19:08,160
Do you know how I feel every
time you walk into a room?
438
00:19:10,140 --> 00:19:13,159
I'm guessing... pretty good?
439
00:19:13,160 --> 00:19:14,920
After 32 years of marriage,
440
00:19:14,940 --> 00:19:17,870
I still light up. Every time.
441
00:19:19,350 --> 00:19:22,917
I feel bad. I guess I should've
told you about Jerome.
442
00:19:22,920 --> 00:19:24,793
Nah.
443
00:19:24,800 --> 00:19:26,593
No, the rule is the rule.
444
00:19:26,600 --> 00:19:28,563
And I still think it's
the right way to go.
445
00:19:28,570 --> 00:19:30,600
I mean, who cares about our past
446
00:19:30,620 --> 00:19:32,375
when we're each other's forever?
447
00:19:32,380 --> 00:19:33,700
Mmm.
448
00:19:33,720 --> 00:19:35,620
I love you.
449
00:19:36,200 --> 00:19:39,200
I think it was kind of sexy,
though, with you being so jealous.
450
00:19:39,220 --> 00:19:41,440
Made me feel like I still got it.
451
00:19:41,460 --> 00:19:44,417
Oh, trust me, you still got it.
452
00:19:46,300 --> 00:19:47,800
And I still want it.
453
00:19:50,320 --> 00:19:52,150
Now come on, let's go get unholy.
454
00:19:52,170 --> 00:19:53,540
- Come on.
- Okay.
455
00:20:00,850 --> 00:20:03,120
Thanks for taking me
to the movies, Calvin.
456
00:20:03,140 --> 00:20:05,167
Anytime, Lil' Tee Tee.
457
00:20:08,010 --> 00:20:10,333
Ooh! This is my favorite part.
458
00:20:10,340 --> 00:20:12,250
He is so cute!
459
00:20:18,460 --> 00:20:20,334
No!
460
00:20:37,930 --> 00:20:42,930
- Synced & corrected by MementMori -
-- www.addic7ed.com --
32453
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