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1
00:00:06,716 --> 00:00:09,093
That is the sexiest fucking thing
I've ever heard.
2
00:00:09,177 --> 00:00:11,721
- You had a one-night stand?
- I know.
3
00:00:11,804 --> 00:00:13,723
I've never done anything
like that before.
4
00:00:13,806 --> 00:00:16,017
You know those girls that are,
like, confident?
5
00:00:16,099 --> 00:00:17,393
- Yeah, I hate them.
- Me too.
6
00:00:17,477 --> 00:00:19,687
I just pretended to be one of them.
7
00:00:19,771 --> 00:00:23,816
Okay, I walked right up to him
and decided to be that bitch!
8
00:00:23,900 --> 00:00:25,109
I don't know.
9
00:00:25,193 --> 00:00:26,319
I still think sex is better
10
00:00:26,402 --> 00:00:27,820
when it's with someone you love,
11
00:00:27,904 --> 00:00:29,405
and it's an expression
of your commitment.
12
00:00:29,489 --> 00:00:31,866
- Ow, damn it!
- That is so boring, Kimberly.
13
00:00:31,949 --> 00:00:34,160
I'm with you, Whitney.
Sex is better with strangers.
14
00:00:34,243 --> 00:00:37,955
- End of story.
- That is not what I said.
15
00:00:41,542 --> 00:00:44,337
- What?
- First of all, good morning.
16
00:00:44,420 --> 00:00:46,506
And second of all,
where were you last night?
17
00:00:46,589 --> 00:00:49,342
Oh, my God,
she had a one-night stand too!
18
00:00:49,425 --> 00:00:51,135
Fuck, I'm so lame.
19
00:00:51,219 --> 00:00:52,678
You ditched us last night,
20
00:00:52,762 --> 00:00:54,514
and you ignored 20 texts
from Kimberly.
21
00:00:54,597 --> 00:00:56,057
And I'm on a limited data plan.
22
00:00:56,140 --> 00:00:58,518
- They still have those?
- Uh, yeah. They do.
23
00:00:58,601 --> 00:01:00,770
And so, now if someone texts me,
what do I do?
24
00:01:00,853 --> 00:01:02,188
I have to respond with an email
25
00:01:02,271 --> 00:01:03,731
or just hope that I run into them.
26
00:01:03,815 --> 00:01:06,651
Okay, look,
I know that we are all roommates,
27
00:01:06,734 --> 00:01:08,361
but that does not mean
that I have to tell you
28
00:01:08,444 --> 00:01:10,279
where I'm going and what I'm doing.
29
00:01:10,363 --> 00:01:12,281
Okay, we literally met,
like, three days ago.
30
00:01:12,365 --> 00:01:13,950
I don't even remember
your last names.
31
00:01:14,033 --> 00:01:16,244
Well, my last name, it's Finkle--
Kimberly Finkle.
32
00:01:16,327 --> 00:01:18,538
And last night,
Kimberly Finkle was worried
33
00:01:18,621 --> 00:01:20,706
that Leighton Murray
got human-trafficked.
34
00:01:20,790 --> 00:01:22,416
- Okay, Kim.
- What? It happens.
35
00:01:22,500 --> 00:01:24,252
- They snatch girls.
- Okay.
36
00:01:24,335 --> 00:01:26,003
Okay. You're right. I get it.
37
00:01:26,087 --> 00:01:28,881
I understand that as a pretty,
blonde woman, I am a target.
38
00:01:28,965 --> 00:01:31,634
How did this become
a compliment to you?
39
00:01:34,470 --> 00:01:37,723
From now on, I will tell you
when I am not coming home
40
00:01:37,807 --> 00:01:40,601
but no more details beyond that,
okay?
41
00:01:40,685 --> 00:01:42,228
No, I will not agree to that.
42
00:01:42,311 --> 00:01:44,397
I came to college to hear
about my roommates' sexploits,
43
00:01:44,480 --> 00:01:46,774
so sit down and tell us
who was inside you!
44
00:01:46,858 --> 00:01:47,900
- Ugh!
- Bela.
45
00:01:47,984 --> 00:01:49,151
No!
46
00:01:49,235 --> 00:01:50,695
Why am I the only fun one
around here?
47
00:02:05,835 --> 00:02:08,295
I'm so excited that classes
are finally starting.
48
00:02:08,379 --> 00:02:11,549
Oh, God, you were, like,
valedictorian or some shit.
49
00:02:11,632 --> 00:02:13,009
- Weren't you?
- I was.
50
00:02:13,092 --> 00:02:16,262
And the salutatorian's GPA
wasn't even close.
51
00:02:16,345 --> 00:02:18,806
- What classes are you taking?
- I literally don't even know.
52
00:02:18,890 --> 00:02:21,601
I just signed up for anything
that started with "intro."
53
00:02:21,684 --> 00:02:23,936
Oh, I'm over there.
I'll catch you later, okay?
54
00:02:24,020 --> 00:02:25,104
- Bye!
- Bye!
55
00:02:25,187 --> 00:02:27,690
♪ Live without me ♪
56
00:02:27,773 --> 00:02:32,194
♪ You can live without a loss ♪
57
00:02:32,278 --> 00:02:34,780
♪ Secretly you're burning
through my veins ♪
58
00:02:34,864 --> 00:02:38,910
♪ Like an overdose, overdose ♪
59
00:02:38,993 --> 00:02:41,871
♪ You're telling me
that I can ease the pain ♪
60
00:02:41,954 --> 00:02:44,457
♪ With your overdose, overdose ♪
61
00:02:44,540 --> 00:02:46,459
Oh, hi! Leighton's brother, Nico!
62
00:02:46,542 --> 00:02:48,502
Hey.
63
00:02:48,586 --> 00:02:51,172
- Morning.
- Morning. Happy FDOC.
64
00:02:51,255 --> 00:02:52,924
- Huh?
- First day of classes.
65
00:02:53,007 --> 00:02:55,384
Oh, right.
66
00:02:55,468 --> 00:02:56,677
So how was the rest of your night?
67
00:02:56,761 --> 00:02:59,305
- It got kind of nuts.
- Nice!
68
00:02:59,388 --> 00:03:02,016
Yeah, I drank way too much
and woke up somewhere
69
00:03:02,099 --> 00:03:04,435
I definitely shouldn't have been.
70
00:03:04,518 --> 00:03:06,270
- You know how it goes.
- Yeah, for sure.
71
00:03:06,354 --> 00:03:08,648
I'm always doing that.
I never wake up in my own bed.
72
00:03:08,731 --> 00:03:10,149
Oh, shit,
73
00:03:10,232 --> 00:03:12,652
are you taking French Revolution
and Romanticism?
74
00:03:12,735 --> 00:03:14,904
- I am! Are you?
- No, I did last year.
75
00:03:14,987 --> 00:03:16,614
- Oh.
- That class is legit, though.
76
00:03:16,697 --> 00:03:17,990
You must really like French.
77
00:03:18,074 --> 00:03:19,992
I do. It's kind of my best subject.
78
00:03:20,076 --> 00:03:21,911
In high school,
I won a certificate that was signed
79
00:03:21,994 --> 00:03:24,664
by the lieutenant governor
of Arizona, no big deal.
80
00:03:24,747 --> 00:03:25,998
All right.
81
00:03:26,082 --> 00:03:29,460
- Well, I'd better go.
- Okay.
82
00:03:29,543 --> 00:03:32,213
Hey, Happy FDOC.
83
00:03:32,296 --> 00:03:33,339
You remembered!
84
00:03:40,721 --> 00:03:43,140
♪ Never took your side ♪
85
00:03:43,224 --> 00:03:45,851
♪ Never curse your name ♪
86
00:03:45,935 --> 00:03:48,562
♪ I keep my lips shut tight ♪
87
00:03:48,646 --> 00:03:51,857
♪ Until you go ♪
88
00:03:51,941 --> 00:03:54,318
♪ We've come as far ♪
89
00:03:54,402 --> 00:03:56,153
♪ As we're ever gonna get ♪
90
00:03:56,237 --> 00:03:59,490
- Hello?
- ♪ Go, foxes, go ♪
91
00:03:59,573 --> 00:04:02,535
♪ Fight on for Essex ♪
92
00:04:02,618 --> 00:04:04,787
♪ Shout it out loud ♪
93
00:04:04,870 --> 00:04:06,414
Okay, I'm hanging up.
94
00:04:06,497 --> 00:04:07,873
My daughter, she goes to Essex!
95
00:04:07,957 --> 00:04:09,208
- Okay, bye.
- No, no, no.
96
00:04:09,291 --> 00:04:10,710
Don't hang up. Don't hang up.
97
00:04:10,793 --> 00:04:12,712
How are ya?
Are you loving it, or what?
98
00:04:12,795 --> 00:04:14,380
Yeah. I don't know. It's fine.
99
00:04:14,463 --> 00:04:15,798
What do you mean "fine"?
100
00:04:15,881 --> 00:04:17,591
Honey,
it's the first week of college.
101
00:04:17,675 --> 00:04:21,137
It's, like, probably the best
seven days of your whole life!
102
00:04:21,220 --> 00:04:22,638
What are you talking about?
103
00:04:22,722 --> 00:04:24,557
Did you make up
with Esme and Francesca yet?
104
00:04:24,640 --> 00:04:26,559
What? No, no, I don't even think
about them anymore.
105
00:04:26,642 --> 00:04:29,186
They can live their lives,
and I can live mine.
106
00:04:29,270 --> 00:04:31,188
Well, that's great, honey. I'm glad.
107
00:04:31,272 --> 00:04:34,483
What else? Have you--have you met
any cute boys, or what?
108
00:04:34,567 --> 00:04:37,361
Yeah, a few.
I'm actually already pregnant,
109
00:04:37,445 --> 00:04:39,613
and I have no idea
who the father is.
110
00:04:39,697 --> 00:04:41,741
Honey, no, no, no.
111
00:04:41,824 --> 00:04:43,951
What did we say about that joke?
112
00:04:44,035 --> 00:04:45,911
It is a joke, right?
113
00:04:45,995 --> 00:04:48,080
Look, I got to go,
but I love you, okay?
114
00:04:48,164 --> 00:04:49,415
Okay. I love you too.
115
00:04:49,498 --> 00:04:51,000
But seriously,
you were joking, right?
116
00:04:51,083 --> 00:04:52,626
Seriously,
please don't get pregnant!
117
00:04:54,920 --> 00:04:57,590
♪ I'm in misery,
but you can't seem ♪
118
00:04:57,673 --> 00:04:58,841
♪ As old as your omens ♪
119
00:04:58,924 --> 00:05:01,427
- Yeah! Aw.
- I love it so much.
120
00:05:01,510 --> 00:05:04,555
♪ We share
never keep your prayer hands ♪
121
00:05:04,638 --> 00:05:06,766
♪ From falling ♪
122
00:05:09,435 --> 00:05:11,937
Esme, Esme's roommate.
123
00:05:12,021 --> 00:05:14,273
Leighton, wait. How have you been?
124
00:05:14,356 --> 00:05:16,984
Francesca and I
were worried about you.
125
00:05:17,068 --> 00:05:18,444
I have been amazing.
126
00:05:18,527 --> 00:05:20,362
Actually,
my new roommates are phenomenal.
127
00:05:20,446 --> 00:05:21,697
We all get along so well.
128
00:05:21,781 --> 00:05:24,408
Um, would you like to sit with us?
129
00:05:24,492 --> 00:05:26,285
Oh, that's so sweet, but actually,
130
00:05:26,368 --> 00:05:28,913
a bunch of new friends
I made are saving me a seat.
131
00:05:28,996 --> 00:05:31,832
Hi! Hey.
132
00:05:31,916 --> 00:05:35,336
Yeah, they're so cute,
but thank you.
133
00:05:35,419 --> 00:05:38,297
Well, I am happy you're doing well.
134
00:05:38,380 --> 00:05:39,965
Same. Same to you.
135
00:05:40,049 --> 00:05:41,759
I'll see you both at graduation?
136
00:05:41,842 --> 00:05:43,052
If you make it!
137
00:05:43,135 --> 00:05:46,514
Welcome to Math 350.
138
00:05:46,597 --> 00:05:50,976
We're going to start today off
with a quick assessment test.
139
00:05:51,060 --> 00:05:53,020
Yay.
140
00:05:55,314 --> 00:05:58,025
All right. Nice pass. Switch it.
141
00:05:58,109 --> 00:06:00,778
Jena to Whitney. Come on. Get clear.
142
00:06:00,861 --> 00:06:01,987
Nice!
143
00:06:02,071 --> 00:06:05,658
Hey!
144
00:06:05,741 --> 00:06:06,992
That's you, Jena! That's you!
145
00:06:07,076 --> 00:06:08,661
- Go, go, go, go, go!
- Over here!
146
00:06:08,744 --> 00:06:10,663
Here, here!
147
00:06:13,457 --> 00:06:16,210
Oh! Motherfucker!
148
00:06:16,293 --> 00:06:19,755
Sorry. My bad.
149
00:06:19,839 --> 00:06:21,298
What the hell kind of a shot
was that?
150
00:06:21,382 --> 00:06:22,883
I was open.
151
00:06:28,097 --> 00:06:29,265
You have a fucking wife?!
152
00:06:29,348 --> 00:06:30,766
Okay, I swear.
I was going to tell you.
153
00:06:30,850 --> 00:06:32,476
When, Dalton? When?
When we were fucking
154
00:06:32,560 --> 00:06:34,687
on your sofa,
or when we were fucking in your car?
155
00:06:34,770 --> 00:06:36,355
It's complicated.
Michelle and I have been
156
00:06:36,438 --> 00:06:38,482
- having problems, and so--
- Oh, you have?
157
00:06:38,566 --> 00:06:40,317
Oh, my God. Is one of you cheating?
158
00:06:40,401 --> 00:06:42,027
I'm trying to be honest
with you right now!
159
00:06:42,111 --> 00:06:44,196
Oh, you want honesty?
Okay, you're a fucking creep.
160
00:06:44,280 --> 00:06:46,282
I'm a fucking catch.
Never speak to me again.
161
00:06:46,365 --> 00:06:47,741
Whitney, please stop.
162
00:06:47,825 --> 00:06:49,660
Michelle and I
haven't slept together in months.
163
00:06:49,743 --> 00:06:52,037
We're barely married anymore, okay?
164
00:06:52,121 --> 00:06:53,706
I think what you and I have is real.
165
00:06:53,789 --> 00:06:55,791
Please don't throw it away
because I haven't found
166
00:06:55,875 --> 00:06:57,334
the right time to end things
with her.
167
00:06:57,418 --> 00:06:59,086
Do whatever you want.
You and I are done.
168
00:06:59,170 --> 00:07:00,838
- Will you just not--
- And this better not
169
00:07:00,921 --> 00:07:02,965
- affect my playing time!
- Okay, okay.
170
00:07:05,301 --> 00:07:06,468
Fuck.
171
00:07:08,304 --> 00:07:09,388
Bonjour.
172
00:07:09,471 --> 00:07:10,973
- Bonjour.
- Bonjour.
173
00:08:37,726 --> 00:08:38,936
Kimberly.
174
00:08:42,063 --> 00:08:44,817
I think this class
is too advanced for you.
175
00:08:44,900 --> 00:08:46,277
I suggest that you drop it.
176
00:08:46,360 --> 00:08:49,029
What? But French is my best subject.
177
00:08:49,113 --> 00:08:50,823
I--I know I didn't do great today,
178
00:08:50,906 --> 00:08:52,992
but I can catch up.
I'm--I'm sure of it.
179
00:08:53,075 --> 00:08:54,827
Well,
ultimately the decision is yours,
180
00:08:54,910 --> 00:08:57,204
but I promise I am suggesting this
181
00:08:57,288 --> 00:08:59,999
because it is best for you.
182
00:09:00,082 --> 00:09:02,668
You are not ready.
183
00:09:02,751 --> 00:09:05,129
♪ We give meaning
to frivolous things ♪
184
00:09:05,212 --> 00:09:08,173
♪ And call them
necessary have-to-haves ♪
185
00:09:08,257 --> 00:09:10,634
♪ Like pricey purses
and the latest Benzes ♪
186
00:09:10,718 --> 00:09:12,177
♪ And the newest gadgets ♪
187
00:09:12,261 --> 00:09:13,679
Welcome to the to the Catullan.
188
00:09:13,762 --> 00:09:15,222
You eight
should be proud of yourselves
189
00:09:15,306 --> 00:09:16,849
for making it through the first cut.
190
00:09:16,932 --> 00:09:18,684
- You're officially funny.
- Or at least marginally
191
00:09:18,767 --> 00:09:20,936
funnier than the unfunny people
who we've already cut.
192
00:09:21,020 --> 00:09:23,188
Hi, Bela Malhotra.
I've been working on this piece
193
00:09:23,272 --> 00:09:24,940
where Billie Eilish
raps a warranty page
194
00:09:25,024 --> 00:09:26,775
of a printer manual.
It goes like this.
195
00:09:26,859 --> 00:09:28,277
Well, I--I'm sorry.
196
00:09:28,360 --> 00:09:30,362
Were our unspoken rules
not clear enough here?
197
00:09:30,446 --> 00:09:31,989
New members
aren't allowed to pitch yet.
198
00:09:32,072 --> 00:09:33,407
For the next six weeks,
199
00:09:33,490 --> 00:09:35,034
you'll be interning
as our support staff.
200
00:09:35,117 --> 00:09:36,785
If I want Bark Thins and a mocha,
201
00:09:36,869 --> 00:09:38,996
you will get me
Bark Thins and a mocha.
202
00:09:39,079 --> 00:09:40,372
And don't be cute and try to write
203
00:09:40,456 --> 00:09:41,874
a funny name on my cup.
You will be cut.
204
00:09:41,957 --> 00:09:44,043
Uh, I'm confused.
Are we not writers?
205
00:09:44,126 --> 00:09:46,378
Not yet. Those of you
who are still around in October
206
00:09:46,462 --> 00:09:48,339
will submit your final pieces
for consideration.
207
00:09:48,422 --> 00:09:50,174
But, for now,
let's celebrate your small,
208
00:09:50,257 --> 00:09:52,593
recent accomplishment and the long,
unrelenting road ahead
209
00:09:52,676 --> 00:09:54,470
with a little bit
of snacks and chitchat.
210
00:10:04,980 --> 00:10:07,316
Hey, uh, Evangeline,
can I talk to you for a moment?
211
00:10:07,399 --> 00:10:09,610
Sure.
I'll catch up with you guys later.
212
00:10:09,693 --> 00:10:11,695
- Yeah.
- Don't worry about it.
213
00:10:11,779 --> 00:10:15,908
Hey. I know you and I got off
on the wrong foot, and I--
214
00:10:15,991 --> 00:10:18,327
I don't want things
to be weird between us.
215
00:10:18,410 --> 00:10:20,204
I sent you an email, apologizing.
216
00:10:20,287 --> 00:10:21,705
- Did you get it?
- I did.
217
00:10:21,789 --> 00:10:23,207
I thought I wrote you back.
218
00:10:23,290 --> 00:10:24,958
Oh, maybe it got stuck in my outbox.
219
00:10:25,042 --> 00:10:26,460
It happens.
220
00:10:26,543 --> 00:10:28,545
Ah, yep. It did.
221
00:10:28,629 --> 00:10:29,713
Okay.
222
00:10:29,797 --> 00:10:31,340
Here. Just sent it!
223
00:10:36,762 --> 00:10:38,597
Did you get it?
224
00:10:38,680 --> 00:10:40,474
- I--I did.
- Great.
225
00:10:50,359 --> 00:10:51,693
Hey, so what did you guys think
226
00:10:51,777 --> 00:10:53,195
of your first day of classes?
227
00:10:53,278 --> 00:10:54,696
Like,
was it easier than you expected,
228
00:10:54,780 --> 00:10:56,782
or harder, or, like, way harder?
229
00:10:56,865 --> 00:10:57,866
- Easier.
- Easy.
230
00:10:57,950 --> 00:10:59,493
Easier, not harder?
231
00:10:59,576 --> 00:11:01,286
- both: Easier.
- Yeah, yeah, I know.
232
00:11:01,370 --> 00:11:03,122
I thought this place
was supposed to be hard,
233
00:11:03,205 --> 00:11:05,707
but my public school education
definitely prepared me for it,
234
00:11:05,791 --> 00:11:06,959
definitely.
235
00:11:07,042 --> 00:11:08,627
Like, I'm gonna go do my homework,
236
00:11:08,711 --> 00:11:10,504
and I'll probably be done in,
like, four seconds.
237
00:11:10,587 --> 00:11:12,798
But, you know,
you've just got to laugh, right?
238
00:11:12,881 --> 00:11:14,967
Like, it's just--it's funny.
239
00:11:18,595 --> 00:11:20,889
- Was that weird?
- Hmm?
240
00:11:20,973 --> 00:11:22,641
Oh, I wasn't really listening.
241
00:11:31,733 --> 00:11:33,944
Uh, Miss Murray, can I talk to you
242
00:11:34,027 --> 00:11:35,654
about yesterday's assessment test?
243
00:11:35,737 --> 00:11:37,197
Before you say anything,
you should know
244
00:11:37,281 --> 00:11:39,658
that my father
did pay for this building.
245
00:11:39,741 --> 00:11:41,452
Okay. Uh, noted.
246
00:11:41,535 --> 00:11:43,203
What I was going to say
is that you got
247
00:11:43,287 --> 00:11:46,290
the highest score in the class.
248
00:11:46,373 --> 00:11:47,666
Wait, really?
249
00:11:47,749 --> 00:11:49,460
- I did the best?
- Yeah.
250
00:11:49,543 --> 00:11:52,546
Wow. I mean, I would have thought
everyone did well.
251
00:11:52,629 --> 00:11:54,506
It was so stupid and easy.
252
00:11:54,590 --> 00:11:56,383
Mm, okay.
Well, that's kind of insulting.
253
00:11:56,467 --> 00:11:59,845
Regardless, you need to be
in a much higher-level class.
254
00:11:59,928 --> 00:12:02,306
Also, I want to increase
the number of women
255
00:12:02,389 --> 00:12:03,682
in my seminar.
256
00:12:03,765 --> 00:12:06,477
To one.
So would you consider moving up?
257
00:12:08,270 --> 00:12:11,023
Sure. On one condition.
258
00:12:11,106 --> 00:12:13,275
Based on yesterday's placement test,
259
00:12:13,358 --> 00:12:16,695
one extraordinary student
has been selected
260
00:12:16,778 --> 00:12:18,280
to join my advanced section,
261
00:12:18,363 --> 00:12:22,201
and that student is Leighton Murray.
262
00:12:22,284 --> 00:12:25,829
She is a charming and dynamic
young woman
263
00:12:25,913 --> 00:12:30,542
who seems like a wonderful friend
who you'd hate to lose.
264
00:12:30,626 --> 00:12:31,919
Now we know that
265
00:12:32,002 --> 00:12:36,715
she is objectively
the smartest person here.
266
00:12:36,798 --> 00:12:38,133
Congrats, Leighton.
267
00:12:38,217 --> 00:12:41,887
Hashtag,
on to bigger and better things.
268
00:12:41,970 --> 00:12:44,014
♪ Never met a pill
I didn't know how to take ♪
269
00:12:44,097 --> 00:12:46,016
♪ But that was getting old,
I had to give it a break ♪
270
00:12:46,099 --> 00:12:48,393
♪ I never met an emotion
I didn't know how to fake ♪
271
00:12:48,477 --> 00:12:51,480
♪ But now I'm getting older,
and I want to be straight ♪
272
00:12:51,563 --> 00:12:54,358
Hey, Jena. I love those toe shoes.
273
00:12:54,441 --> 00:12:56,109
Hey, Willow.
274
00:12:56,193 --> 00:12:59,821
Damn, that look she gave you
was true hatred.
275
00:12:59,905 --> 00:13:01,240
I would have cried.
276
00:13:01,323 --> 00:13:03,242
- What are you up to tonight?
- Nothing.
277
00:13:03,325 --> 00:13:05,494
I'm doing nothing in my apartment,
by myself.
278
00:13:05,577 --> 00:13:07,704
Willow, why are you being weird?
279
00:13:07,788 --> 00:13:09,122
I am not being weird.
280
00:13:09,206 --> 00:13:11,750
You're totally being weird.
What's going on?
281
00:13:11,833 --> 00:13:14,503
I'm going to Jena's house
with the rest of the team.
282
00:13:14,586 --> 00:13:17,047
Are you serious?
She invited everyone but me?
283
00:13:17,130 --> 00:13:18,632
No, no. She did not!
284
00:13:18,715 --> 00:13:20,300
She also didn't invite Brittany.
285
00:13:20,384 --> 00:13:22,970
- Who's Brittany?
- She's studying abroad.
286
00:13:23,053 --> 00:13:24,721
Ah, don't worry!
287
00:13:24,805 --> 00:13:28,225
I'll go tonight and talk up
how chill you are.
288
00:13:28,308 --> 00:13:29,977
I'll fix this!
289
00:13:30,060 --> 00:13:31,311
- Okay.
- Okay.
290
00:13:31,395 --> 00:13:32,563
Thank you.
291
00:13:34,731 --> 00:13:36,275
Oh, I don't know, man.
292
00:13:36,358 --> 00:13:37,776
I just thought college would be
293
00:13:37,859 --> 00:13:39,444
a lot more fun and crazy
than it's been so far.
294
00:13:39,528 --> 00:13:40,904
- Yeah.
- I've been here six days.
295
00:13:40,988 --> 00:13:42,197
I've made multiple enemies,
296
00:13:42,281 --> 00:13:43,865
and I've had zero three-way kisses.
297
00:13:43,949 --> 00:13:45,909
What are you talking about?
I mean, two weeks ago,
298
00:13:45,993 --> 00:13:49,746
I was in Ohio, and tonight
I'm going to a naked party.
299
00:13:49,830 --> 00:13:51,456
Not many of those in Akron.
300
00:13:51,540 --> 00:13:54,668
- I'm sorry, what?
- Oh, Akron is a city in Ohio.
301
00:13:54,751 --> 00:13:57,129
Bitch, you know
that's not the detail that I want!
302
00:13:59,214 --> 00:14:01,592
Oh, my God, Travis.
It's looking so good!
303
00:14:01,675 --> 00:14:03,635
- Yeah.
- What is going on in here?
304
00:14:03,719 --> 00:14:05,012
- It smells awful.
- Ugh!
305
00:14:05,095 --> 00:14:06,680
Yeah, Travis is contouring my body.
306
00:14:06,763 --> 00:14:08,849
He's using makeup to subtly
enhance my banging bod.
307
00:14:08,932 --> 00:14:10,142
- It's impressive, right?
- Yeah.
308
00:14:10,225 --> 00:14:11,435
Nobody has that many abs.
309
00:14:11,518 --> 00:14:12,978
Yeah, those lines are way too dark.
310
00:14:13,061 --> 00:14:14,396
All right? You look like xylophone.
311
00:14:14,479 --> 00:14:16,148
Uh, check yourself. These are
312
00:14:16,231 --> 00:14:18,859
professional-grade tools
that I bought gently used on eBay.
313
00:14:18,942 --> 00:14:20,569
Yeah, but why are you doing this?
314
00:14:20,652 --> 00:14:23,614
Because I'm going to a naked party!
315
00:14:23,697 --> 00:14:25,365
- Huh?
- To a what?
316
00:14:25,449 --> 00:14:28,035
- So you're going to an orgy?
- No, no, no. It's not an orgy!
317
00:14:28,118 --> 00:14:30,454
It's a normal party,
except with naked people.
318
00:14:30,537 --> 00:14:32,664
And I'm not going to it.
We're going to it.
319
00:14:32,748 --> 00:14:33,874
Travis, could you move to my back
320
00:14:33,957 --> 00:14:35,292
while I address my roommates?
321
00:14:35,375 --> 00:14:37,210
I have come up
with undeniable reasons
322
00:14:37,294 --> 00:14:39,796
why each of you should join me
and party nude.
323
00:14:39,880 --> 00:14:41,798
- Leighton, you're first.
- You are not
324
00:14:41,882 --> 00:14:43,675
going to convince me to go!
I'm going to head out.
325
00:14:43,759 --> 00:14:45,385
- Where are you going?
- Oh, I'm sorry.
326
00:14:45,469 --> 00:14:47,012
Did I forget to mention
where I was going?
327
00:14:47,095 --> 00:14:49,514
Right, I didn't,
because it's none of your business.
328
00:14:49,598 --> 00:14:51,099
Bye.
329
00:14:51,183 --> 00:14:52,643
Savage.
330
00:14:55,520 --> 00:14:57,814
- Whitney Chase.
- Yeah, I can't make it.
331
00:14:57,898 --> 00:14:59,483
Why is everyone
opposed to this party?
332
00:14:59,566 --> 00:15:02,277
Because it sounds weird, Bela!
333
00:15:02,361 --> 00:15:05,030
Fine. Kimberly, it's just us two.
334
00:15:05,113 --> 00:15:07,074
- Mm-hmm.
- Men have objectified
335
00:15:07,157 --> 00:15:09,409
women's bodies for tens,
if not hundreds of years.
336
00:15:09,493 --> 00:15:12,120
Bela, I'm sorry.
I can't make time for this.
337
00:15:12,204 --> 00:15:13,413
Why can't you make time for this?
338
00:15:13,497 --> 00:15:15,040
- I just can't.
- Wha--what--
339
00:15:18,085 --> 00:15:19,920
Why is there a tan ass-print
on our couch?
340
00:15:20,003 --> 00:15:23,882
What you should be asking is,
why aren't there four?
341
00:15:39,356 --> 00:15:41,066
What?
342
00:15:41,149 --> 00:15:42,275
Ugh.
343
00:15:47,155 --> 00:15:49,950
God, you're so much hotter
than your profile.
344
00:15:50,033 --> 00:15:51,743
It's like a reverse catfish.
345
00:15:51,827 --> 00:15:52,869
Thanks.
346
00:15:54,413 --> 00:15:55,414
I'm--I'm so sorry.
347
00:15:55,497 --> 00:15:56,707
Does this car seat come out?
348
00:15:56,790 --> 00:15:57,999
It's really digging into my boob.
349
00:15:58,083 --> 00:15:59,334
Oh, it's, like, a whole thing
350
00:15:59,418 --> 00:16:01,044
- to remove it, you know--
- It's fine.
351
00:16:01,128 --> 00:16:02,212
Let's just--
352
00:16:05,298 --> 00:16:08,719
Hey, do you go to Essex?
353
00:16:08,802 --> 00:16:10,095
How--how did you know that?
354
00:16:10,178 --> 00:16:11,930
Uh, your keychain?
355
00:16:14,641 --> 00:16:15,934
What's wrong?
356
00:16:16,017 --> 00:16:18,979
- Are you not out?
- No, I'm--
357
00:16:19,062 --> 00:16:20,689
I'm sorry.
How is that any of your business?
358
00:16:20,772 --> 00:16:22,649
I didn't mean anything by it.
I'm just surprised.
359
00:16:22,733 --> 00:16:24,276
In fact, kids your age
came out when they're,
360
00:16:24,359 --> 00:16:26,403
like, six years old.
Isn't it cool to be gay now?
361
00:16:26,486 --> 00:16:28,613
Oh, my God.
362
00:16:28,697 --> 00:16:30,282
- Did I upset you?
- Uh, no.
363
00:16:30,365 --> 00:16:33,869
No, it's just you have no idea
what you are talking about.
364
00:16:35,120 --> 00:16:37,164
- When did you come out?
- In high school.
365
00:16:37,247 --> 00:16:39,541
So for someone like you,
I'm sure coming out
366
00:16:39,624 --> 00:16:41,084
probably made you more interesting,
367
00:16:41,168 --> 00:16:42,836
but, for me, I was popular,
368
00:16:42,919 --> 00:16:44,713
so I actually
have something to lose.
369
00:16:44,796 --> 00:16:48,550
It's hard to find the courage
to come out, but it's worth it.
370
00:16:48,633 --> 00:16:49,968
Maybe for you.
371
00:16:50,051 --> 00:16:51,970
I don't want being gay
to be my identity.
372
00:16:52,053 --> 00:16:53,638
I like my identity.
I don't want to be
373
00:16:53,722 --> 00:16:55,974
the gay Kappa girl
or the lesbian cousin.
374
00:16:56,057 --> 00:16:58,435
I don't--
I don't want to be other, okay?
375
00:16:58,518 --> 00:17:00,061
- I just want to be me.
- Mm.
376
00:17:00,145 --> 00:17:03,023
- By hiding who you are?
- No, I'm--
377
00:17:03,106 --> 00:17:04,775
I came here to hook up,
not to be lectured
378
00:17:04,858 --> 00:17:07,194
by some suburban mom
in a bad cardigan.
379
00:17:07,276 --> 00:17:10,322
Uh, excuse you.
I'm just trying to help.
380
00:17:15,202 --> 00:17:17,245
- Hello, Kimberly.
- I bought this tea at a store.
381
00:17:17,329 --> 00:17:18,872
- I don't have a hot plate.
- It's okay.
382
00:17:18,955 --> 00:17:21,666
I was just doing
my Friday night sweep,
383
00:17:21,750 --> 00:17:23,043
looking for opioids.
384
00:17:23,126 --> 00:17:25,420
I didn't expect anyone to be here.
385
00:17:25,504 --> 00:17:28,507
Oh, I'm taking advantage
of the quiet to study.
386
00:17:28,590 --> 00:17:31,510
On a Friday night?
You should be out with friends.
387
00:17:31,593 --> 00:17:33,845
Uh, it's okay.
I'll go out another night.
388
00:17:33,929 --> 00:17:36,515
Kimberly, the first week of school
389
00:17:36,598 --> 00:17:38,350
is when people find their friends.
390
00:17:38,433 --> 00:17:42,521
My first weekend, I skipped
the Swedish mid-September party.
391
00:17:42,604 --> 00:17:44,564
That was when they found
the inside joke
392
00:17:44,648 --> 00:17:47,192
they would be utilizing
for the next four years,
393
00:17:47,275 --> 00:17:50,779
and I still don't know
who Radish Face is.
394
00:17:52,697 --> 00:17:54,157
I fear it may be me.
395
00:17:54,241 --> 00:17:56,576
Well, I can't be the only one
staying in today.
396
00:17:56,660 --> 00:17:59,287
Believe you are.
Well, if you get lonely
397
00:17:59,371 --> 00:18:00,705
or have dark thoughts,
398
00:18:00,789 --> 00:18:03,083
come over
and we can play a board game.
399
00:18:03,166 --> 00:18:07,254
It is my job to be available for...
people like you.
400
00:18:13,176 --> 00:18:16,429
Wait for me! I'm coming!
401
00:18:16,513 --> 00:18:18,223
I deserve to have some fun.
402
00:18:18,306 --> 00:18:21,017
- Whoo! Yes, let's go!
- Yes!
403
00:18:21,101 --> 00:18:23,311
Yo, we're gonna see
each other's tits tonight.
404
00:18:37,868 --> 00:18:39,494
Yes! Remember?
405
00:18:39,578 --> 00:18:41,496
What's up, bitches?
406
00:18:43,331 --> 00:18:44,666
What are you doing here?
407
00:18:44,749 --> 00:18:47,085
I realized
I'm not just gonna sit at home
408
00:18:47,168 --> 00:18:49,421
because one girl
doesn't want me here for no reason.
409
00:18:49,504 --> 00:18:51,339
There is a reason:
she doesn't like you.
410
00:18:51,423 --> 00:18:54,759
Well, she is definitely
gonna like me after I give her this.
411
00:18:54,843 --> 00:18:57,053
A basket of lavender soaps
and hand creams?
412
00:18:57,137 --> 00:18:59,431
She's the co-captain of the team,
not your great-aunt.
413
00:18:59,514 --> 00:19:01,683
This is nice!
It has bath crystals in it.
414
00:19:01,766 --> 00:19:03,143
- Mm-mm.
- Whatever, okay?
415
00:19:03,226 --> 00:19:05,854
I'm gonna go find Jena,
make her my best friend,
416
00:19:05,937 --> 00:19:08,523
- and replace you.
- I'm your best friend?
417
00:19:08,607 --> 00:19:10,275
You've known me for,
like, four weeks.
418
00:19:13,194 --> 00:19:14,738
Tragic.
419
00:19:17,490 --> 00:19:19,868
I said I was sorry.
I don't make the schedule!
420
00:19:19,951 --> 00:19:21,453
It's like
I don't even have a girlfriend.
421
00:19:21,536 --> 00:19:23,496
- I'm done.
- Stop. Don't do this, Jason!
422
00:19:23,580 --> 00:19:26,291
What the fuck?
Why are you in my room?!
423
00:19:26,374 --> 00:19:28,585
I brought you some soaps.
424
00:19:38,720 --> 00:19:40,597
So how does this work?
425
00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:43,475
Do we just take our clothes off
and go inside?
426
00:19:43,558 --> 00:19:44,601
I guess.
427
00:19:57,155 --> 00:19:59,449
This just got so real, so quick.
428
00:19:59,532 --> 00:20:00,992
I don't think I can do this.
429
00:20:01,076 --> 00:20:03,620
Fuck it. I'm going in!
430
00:20:03,703 --> 00:20:05,163
Oh, my God, Jocelyn.
431
00:20:05,246 --> 00:20:08,041
You have, like,
perfect Keira Knightley boobs.
432
00:20:08,124 --> 00:20:11,127
Well, I'll see you inside?
433
00:20:15,048 --> 00:20:16,091
Whew.
434
00:20:19,511 --> 00:20:20,720
Well...
435
00:20:20,804 --> 00:20:23,848
- Same time?
- Same time.
436
00:20:35,735 --> 00:20:37,529
- Okay.
- Okay.
437
00:20:37,612 --> 00:20:38,947
- Let's go!
- Let's go!
438
00:20:44,285 --> 00:20:46,454
- No, he went down the way!
- He went down the whole way.
439
00:20:46,538 --> 00:20:47,747
- Holy--
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
440
00:20:47,831 --> 00:20:49,541
Guys, stop. Hey, Leighton.
441
00:20:49,624 --> 00:20:51,501
- Oh, hey.
- What's up?
442
00:20:51,584 --> 00:20:54,379
- Are you, like, alone?
- Yeah.
443
00:20:54,462 --> 00:20:57,465
- But it's a Friday night.
- Yeah, I know it's Friday.
444
00:20:57,549 --> 00:20:59,217
Maybe I'm going somewhere
really fun.
445
00:20:59,300 --> 00:21:01,886
- Are you?
- No.
446
00:21:01,970 --> 00:21:04,180
Look, Leight,
just because those girls
447
00:21:04,264 --> 00:21:07,142
don't want to live with you
doesn't make you a loser.
448
00:21:07,225 --> 00:21:09,477
Yo, what they did was not cool.
449
00:21:09,561 --> 00:21:12,188
- You told them?
- Well, yeah. Of course I did.
450
00:21:12,272 --> 00:21:13,940
I mean, that was really fucked up.
451
00:21:14,024 --> 00:21:18,069
Yeah, for what it's worth,
we all felt so bad for you.
452
00:21:18,153 --> 00:21:20,363
Okay. Ah. Well, this was horrible,
453
00:21:20,447 --> 00:21:22,699
and I am, uh, I'm going to go drink
454
00:21:22,782 --> 00:21:24,784
until I forget this conversation
ever happened.
455
00:21:24,868 --> 00:21:26,244
Leighton, Leighton.
456
00:21:26,327 --> 00:21:28,038
You're gonna make friends soon.
I know it.
457
00:21:28,121 --> 00:21:30,290
Everything you're saying
is making it worse. Thank you.
458
00:21:30,373 --> 00:21:32,500
Damn, she must be really hurting.
459
00:21:32,584 --> 00:21:34,335
Want to go throw knives at trees?
460
00:21:34,419 --> 00:21:35,420
- Yep.
- Let's fucking go.
461
00:21:35,503 --> 00:21:37,422
- Let's go!
- Yahoo!
462
00:21:37,505 --> 00:21:39,215
♪ The day you took my voice ♪
463
00:21:39,299 --> 00:21:41,468
♪ The power of my melodies ♪
464
00:21:41,551 --> 00:21:44,596
♪ I knew that this was the day ♪
465
00:21:44,679 --> 00:21:46,056
♪ And then you took my voice ♪
466
00:21:46,139 --> 00:21:47,766
Okay, I don't think you realize it,
467
00:21:47,849 --> 00:21:50,977
but you're aggressively cupping
your breasts in shame.
468
00:21:51,061 --> 00:21:53,938
Yes. You're right. I am doing that.
469
00:21:54,022 --> 00:21:57,776
I'm fixing it now. Here we go.
470
00:21:57,859 --> 00:21:59,527
Ah!
471
00:21:59,611 --> 00:22:01,321
I'm proud of you.
472
00:22:01,404 --> 00:22:03,448
- Ready to mingle?
- Yeah.
473
00:22:03,531 --> 00:22:05,575
Which group of butts
looks more approachable:
474
00:22:05,658 --> 00:22:07,452
the right or the left?
475
00:22:07,535 --> 00:22:09,120
The right butts look kinder,
476
00:22:09,204 --> 00:22:10,663
but I don't know
what I'm basing that on.
477
00:22:10,747 --> 00:22:12,791
Yeah, no, I agree.
Right butts, for sure.
478
00:22:12,874 --> 00:22:14,667
- Uh-huh.
- Let's go.
479
00:22:16,377 --> 00:22:18,171
Hey, Emma is on the lit mag?
480
00:22:18,254 --> 00:22:20,757
Hello, everybody!
481
00:22:20,840 --> 00:22:23,927
So embarrassing that we all
wore the same outfit, right?
482
00:22:24,010 --> 00:22:25,470
Is this your first naked party?
483
00:22:25,553 --> 00:22:27,972
No. Why would you say that?
484
00:22:28,056 --> 00:22:31,059
Because you looked down
at everyone's junk multiple times.
485
00:22:31,142 --> 00:22:33,645
Naked parties are about
being comfortable in your skin,
486
00:22:33,728 --> 00:22:35,230
not objectifying
and catching a peek.
487
00:22:35,313 --> 00:22:38,483
Oh, no doubt. No doubt. I know that.
488
00:22:38,566 --> 00:22:40,443
I just looked down again, didn't I?
489
00:22:40,527 --> 00:22:41,694
- Yeah.
- Mm-hmm.
490
00:22:44,572 --> 00:22:46,116
So we're not even supposed to look?
491
00:22:46,199 --> 00:22:48,660
What is this, a naked party
under Taliban rule?
492
00:22:48,743 --> 00:22:51,663
Why are you two hanging out
alone like a bunch of creeps?
493
00:22:51,746 --> 00:22:53,206
People think you're cops.
494
00:22:53,289 --> 00:22:54,958
Maybe we should just go.
495
00:22:55,041 --> 00:22:57,127
I thought this would be the amazing,
unforgettable party
496
00:22:57,210 --> 00:23:00,839
I've been waiting for,
but that's obviously not the case.
497
00:23:00,922 --> 00:23:02,674
No, we are gonna stay,
498
00:23:02,757 --> 00:23:04,717
and we are gonna make
the most of it together.
499
00:23:04,801 --> 00:23:07,178
Jocelyn, you seem so comfortable.
500
00:23:07,262 --> 00:23:08,638
How can we be more like you?
501
00:23:08,721 --> 00:23:11,683
I pregamed a lot,
so I'm crazy drunk.
502
00:23:11,766 --> 00:23:13,935
Okay.
503
00:23:14,018 --> 00:23:15,520
Here we go. Oh.
504
00:23:15,603 --> 00:23:18,356
♪ That's the way we get down, down ♪
505
00:23:18,439 --> 00:23:19,941
♪ Turn it up, turn it up ♪
506
00:23:20,024 --> 00:23:22,944
♪ That's the way we get down, down ♪
507
00:23:23,027 --> 00:23:24,028
♪ Turn it up, turn it up ♪
508
00:23:27,490 --> 00:23:30,702
Okay. Well,
there's a gift receipt in the basket.
509
00:23:30,785 --> 00:23:32,662
You have 14 days.
510
00:23:34,873 --> 00:23:36,207
Are you okay?
511
00:23:36,291 --> 00:23:38,084
My fucking boyfriend
just broke up with me.
512
00:23:38,168 --> 00:23:39,335
Okay.
513
00:23:39,419 --> 00:23:41,337
He can't handle our soccer schedule.
514
00:23:41,421 --> 00:23:44,007
He says I'm never around,
like my life should revolve
515
00:23:44,090 --> 00:23:45,675
around hanging out
in his frat basement
516
00:23:45,758 --> 00:23:47,802
while he and his friends
flick each other in the nuts.
517
00:23:47,886 --> 00:23:49,345
Sounds like a real winner.
518
00:23:49,429 --> 00:23:51,764
You don't fucking know him.
His dog just died.
519
00:23:51,848 --> 00:23:54,267
I should not have said that.
520
00:23:54,350 --> 00:23:57,604
It's okay. He does suck.
521
00:23:57,687 --> 00:24:01,232
It's just, not like guys
are lining up for me, so--
522
00:24:01,316 --> 00:24:03,318
Jena, what? You're so pretty.
523
00:24:03,401 --> 00:24:05,028
- Oh, fuck you.
- You are!
524
00:24:05,111 --> 00:24:06,362
You're tall, you're ripped,
525
00:24:06,446 --> 00:24:08,531
and you're, like, so good at soccer.
526
00:24:08,615 --> 00:24:10,533
That's why it kills me
that you don't like me.
527
00:24:10,617 --> 00:24:12,911
So, look, if this guy
doesn't get that, fuck him.
528
00:24:12,994 --> 00:24:17,081
Move on.
There's plenty of guys out there.
529
00:24:17,165 --> 00:24:19,792
Thanks.
530
00:24:19,876 --> 00:24:21,419
So are we good now?
531
00:24:21,502 --> 00:24:23,630
'Cause I'd love it
if you stopped kicking the shit
532
00:24:23,713 --> 00:24:25,590
out of me on the field.
533
00:24:25,673 --> 00:24:27,926
Yeah, we're good.
534
00:24:28,009 --> 00:24:29,594
But you're wrong about one thing:
535
00:24:29,677 --> 00:24:30,929
There aren't many guys our age
536
00:24:31,012 --> 00:24:32,722
who can handle
being with girls like us,
537
00:24:32,805 --> 00:24:35,266
so good luck finding one.
538
00:24:39,187 --> 00:24:42,148
I mean, come on. It's a naked party!
539
00:24:42,232 --> 00:24:43,608
Everybody looks at everybody.
540
00:24:43,691 --> 00:24:46,027
You just can't look like
you're looking.
541
00:24:46,110 --> 00:24:49,239
Like, right now, I just glanced
at your boobs three times.
542
00:24:49,322 --> 00:24:51,324
No, you did not!
You were looking at my eyes.
543
00:24:51,407 --> 00:24:54,619
I micro-glanced.
The left one is bigger.
544
00:24:54,702 --> 00:24:57,830
Holy hell, she's right.
Your left one is bigger.
545
00:24:57,914 --> 00:25:01,960
Hey, do any of you know
where a girl named Sarah is?
546
00:25:02,043 --> 00:25:03,628
- No.
- Sorry.
547
00:25:03,711 --> 00:25:05,713
I don't.
548
00:25:05,797 --> 00:25:07,757
- Did you see that?
- Wow!
549
00:25:07,840 --> 00:25:09,008
Micro-glance!
550
00:25:10,718 --> 00:25:12,428
I'm gonna get a drink.
551
00:25:18,685 --> 00:25:19,978
What the hell?!
552
00:25:20,061 --> 00:25:23,481
- Ugh, of course it's you.
- You know what? No.
553
00:25:23,564 --> 00:25:25,984
- You spilled my drink.
- And I'm sorry about that,
554
00:25:26,067 --> 00:25:27,485
but I already know
where this is going.
555
00:25:27,568 --> 00:25:28,861
You're gonna say
something mean to me
556
00:25:28,945 --> 00:25:30,280
and make me feel bad about myself.
557
00:25:30,363 --> 00:25:31,656
I'm a good person!
558
00:25:31,739 --> 00:25:34,033
Did I jerk your boyfriend's dick?
I did!
559
00:25:34,117 --> 00:25:35,493
But if I knew he had a girlfriend,
560
00:25:35,576 --> 00:25:36,995
I wouldn't have done it.
561
00:25:37,078 --> 00:25:38,830
Please stop being mean to me.
562
00:25:38,913 --> 00:25:41,249
I'm sorry!
563
00:25:41,332 --> 00:25:42,625
Come over here.
564
00:25:46,004 --> 00:25:48,673
I know I've been... less than kind.
565
00:25:48,756 --> 00:25:51,968
It's because I fought super hard
for you in the first cut.
566
00:25:52,051 --> 00:25:53,511
Staff was split
about your submission,
567
00:25:53,594 --> 00:25:55,221
and people preferred this guy,
568
00:25:55,305 --> 00:25:58,599
but I thought your stuff was funny,
so I pushed for you,
569
00:25:58,683 --> 00:26:00,184
which then
made me look like an idiot
570
00:26:00,268 --> 00:26:02,061
when everyone found out
that the girl I supported
571
00:26:02,145 --> 00:26:04,647
had a jack-fest
with my boyf the night before.
572
00:26:04,731 --> 00:26:06,024
You liked my submission?
573
00:26:06,107 --> 00:26:08,401
- It was pretty solid.
- Pretty solid?
574
00:26:08,484 --> 00:26:10,611
You're a first-year. Take it easy.
575
00:26:10,695 --> 00:26:14,240
So, wait, can we just, please,
be good now?
576
00:26:14,324 --> 00:26:16,242
I don't want you to hate me.
577
00:26:16,326 --> 00:26:17,910
Yeah, we can be good.
578
00:26:17,994 --> 00:26:20,955
- I think I need to hug you.
- Oh!
579
00:26:23,624 --> 00:26:25,668
Oh, jeez, my abs rubbed off on you.
580
00:26:25,752 --> 00:26:27,712
Mm, my boob contour got on you too.
581
00:26:27,795 --> 00:26:29,714
Ah! We both contoured?!
582
00:26:29,797 --> 00:26:31,507
I love us!
583
00:26:40,350 --> 00:26:42,727
- Hey.
- Hey.
584
00:26:44,937 --> 00:26:46,105
This will be quick.
585
00:26:46,189 --> 00:26:48,691
Oh, shit. You're wasted.
586
00:26:48,775 --> 00:26:52,445
Nico, at the naked party,
I had an epiphany.
587
00:26:52,528 --> 00:26:57,367
You are going to French tutor me...
588
00:26:57,450 --> 00:26:59,035
in French, please.
589
00:26:59,118 --> 00:27:01,788
You're asking me to tutor you
at 1:00 in the morning?
590
00:27:01,871 --> 00:27:02,955
Mm-hmm.
591
00:27:04,874 --> 00:27:06,918
Sure, I'll tutor you.
592
00:27:07,001 --> 00:27:11,214
Oh, excellent, and I appreciate.
593
00:27:11,297 --> 00:27:13,591
Good night.
594
00:27:13,674 --> 00:27:15,760
- That's it?
- That'll be all, Tutor.
595
00:27:15,843 --> 00:27:18,096
Thank you!
596
00:27:18,179 --> 00:27:19,555
What?
597
00:27:29,148 --> 00:27:31,609
Hello, John. Your hat looks stupid,
598
00:27:31,692 --> 00:27:34,612
and the school you founded sucks.
599
00:27:34,695 --> 00:27:37,949
But I'm sorry you died in the snow.
600
00:27:40,368 --> 00:27:41,452
Hello?
601
00:27:41,536 --> 00:27:43,204
- Hey, it's Chloe.
- Who?
602
00:27:43,287 --> 00:27:45,623
You had my nipples in your mouth
in a minivan today?
603
00:27:45,706 --> 00:27:47,208
What do you want?
604
00:27:47,291 --> 00:27:49,377
Look, did you not sufficiently
lecture me in your car?
605
00:27:49,460 --> 00:27:51,129
I'm just calling to check in on you.
606
00:27:51,212 --> 00:27:52,964
I could tell
you're in a really bad place
607
00:27:53,047 --> 00:27:54,715
and just wanted to say that,
608
00:27:54,799 --> 00:27:56,426
it gets better.
609
00:27:56,509 --> 00:27:58,511
Oh, my God. Are you fucking serious?
610
00:27:58,594 --> 00:28:00,555
You're "It Gets Better-ing" me?
611
00:28:00,638 --> 00:28:02,056
Yeah, no, I am fine.
612
00:28:02,140 --> 00:28:05,393
You drive a Ford Windstar.
You get better, hmm?
613
00:28:05,476 --> 00:28:06,936
My--my life is great.
614
00:28:07,019 --> 00:28:08,729
Why is everyone fucking pitying me?
615
00:28:08,813 --> 00:28:10,064
Have you seen me?
616
00:28:10,148 --> 00:28:12,400
I'm smart, stylish
and as it turns out,
617
00:28:12,483 --> 00:28:13,901
I'm really fucking good at math.
618
00:28:13,985 --> 00:28:15,361
I'm thriving!
619
00:28:15,445 --> 00:28:17,447
- But you're living a lie.
- Yeah, I know!
620
00:28:17,530 --> 00:28:20,825
You don't think
I fucking know that?!
621
00:28:23,411 --> 00:28:25,997
I'm thriving!
622
00:28:26,080 --> 00:28:27,999
Stop right there!
623
00:28:28,082 --> 00:28:30,001
- Don't move!
- Fuck!
624
00:28:30,084 --> 00:28:32,336
Hey, I said stop!
625
00:28:32,420 --> 00:28:34,881
Go around, go around! Stop running!
626
00:28:34,964 --> 00:28:38,009
♪ I could stand out here
and tell myself I wasn't ready ♪
627
00:28:38,092 --> 00:28:39,886
♪ I'll get a million-dollar deal ♪
628
00:28:39,969 --> 00:28:41,679
♪ They both are really heavy ♪
629
00:28:41,762 --> 00:28:43,806
♪ Making plans that slip
right through my hands ♪
630
00:28:43,890 --> 00:28:45,349
♪ Just like confetti ♪
631
00:28:48,561 --> 00:28:51,606
♪ We could get together,
make a baby if you're ready ♪
632
00:28:51,689 --> 00:28:53,316
♪ Pretend I'm nothing special ♪
633
00:28:53,399 --> 00:28:55,318
♪ Yeah, they both are really heavy ♪
634
00:28:55,401 --> 00:28:57,528
♪ Making plans that slip
right through my hands ♪
635
00:28:57,612 --> 00:28:58,946
♪ Just like confetti ♪
636
00:29:08,247 --> 00:29:09,373
♪ Ooh, baby ♪
637
00:29:12,668 --> 00:29:14,420
♪ Are you a girl? ♪
638
00:29:16,339 --> 00:29:18,007
♪ Are you a boy? ♪
639
00:29:19,800 --> 00:29:21,219
♪ I'm not your girl ♪
640
00:29:23,221 --> 00:29:25,723
♪ I'm not your boy ♪
641
00:29:25,806 --> 00:29:27,433
♪ Freak, I could stand out here ♪
642
00:29:27,517 --> 00:29:29,519
♪ And tell myself I wasn't ready ♪
643
00:29:29,602 --> 00:29:31,270
♪ I'll get a million-dollar deal ♪
644
00:29:31,354 --> 00:29:33,231
♪ They both are really heavy ♪
645
00:29:33,314 --> 00:29:36,651
♪ Can you love somebody
with a mind full of confetti? ♪
646
00:29:39,237 --> 00:29:41,280
♪ Daddy, we could get together ♪
647
00:29:41,364 --> 00:29:43,074
♪ Make a baby if you're ready ♪
648
00:29:43,157 --> 00:29:44,742
♪ Pretend I'm nothing special ♪
649
00:29:44,825 --> 00:29:46,827
♪ Yeah, they both are really heavy ♪
650
00:29:46,911 --> 00:29:48,955
♪ Making plans that slip
right through my hands ♪
48340
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