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00:00:04,535 --> 00:00:07,265
sync & correction by f1nc0
~ Addic7ed.com ~
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['70s rock music playing]
3
00:00:23,658 --> 00:00:24,658
_
4
00:00:24,659 --> 00:00:27,078
[record screeches]
Do you want to tell me what this is?
5
00:00:27,161 --> 00:00:30,874
- What?
- This. This failure notice from your school?
6
00:00:30,957 --> 00:00:33,292
If you're an expert on what it is,
why did you have to ask me?
7
00:00:33,376 --> 00:00:35,420
Don't start. Honestly, Kevin,
8
00:00:35,503 --> 00:00:37,797
you're in danger of failing
every class you have.
9
00:00:37,881 --> 00:00:39,298
[mumbles] Not every class.
I'm acing speech.
10
00:00:39,382 --> 00:00:42,134
- What did you say?
- I said I'm acing speech!
11
00:00:42,218 --> 00:00:44,971
Aah! Your father's gonna
have an absolute stroke,
12
00:00:45,055 --> 00:00:46,932
and you can clean him with a sponge.
13
00:00:47,015 --> 00:00:48,892
- Fine, I will!
- [Maureen] Mom!
14
00:00:48,975 --> 00:00:50,685
[loud thudding]
[Maureen shouts]
15
00:00:50,769 --> 00:00:52,353
[both grunting]
16
00:00:53,145 --> 00:00:55,356
- Leave your sister alone.
- All right, all right, all right!
17
00:00:55,440 --> 00:00:57,525
Can't I have one day
without any upsetment?
18
00:00:57,609 --> 00:00:59,318
I'm gonna ride to the railroad tracks.
19
00:00:59,402 --> 00:01:00,987
- Oh, no, you are not.
- Yeah, I am.
20
00:01:01,071 --> 00:01:02,739
Honestly, do you think
you get to live your life
21
00:01:02,822 --> 00:01:04,908
not doing anything your
mother wants... [all arguing]
22
00:01:04,991 --> 00:01:07,994
...not following any of your mother's
rules, just to make her go insane?
23
00:01:08,078 --> 00:01:09,871
You are gonna make me
go completely insane.
24
00:01:09,955 --> 00:01:12,958
That is what's gonna happen.
[car sputters, stops outside]
25
00:01:13,041 --> 00:01:14,500
Dad's home.
26
00:01:16,419 --> 00:01:18,421
[Susan] We will not say a
word about this to your father
27
00:01:18,504 --> 00:01:21,633
until after supper and
his food has settled.
28
00:01:21,716 --> 00:01:24,298
- Fine, I'll wait till he farts.
- [softly] Lower your voice!
29
00:01:25,135 --> 00:01:26,596
[sighs]
30
00:01:28,347 --> 00:01:31,726
Ah! Son of a bitch!
Fuckin' American cars.
31
00:01:31,810 --> 00:01:33,895
No wonder the Japs are beating us.
[Major barking]
32
00:01:33,979 --> 00:01:37,273
Ah, hey, buddy. At least somebody
in this family gives a shit about me.
33
00:01:37,356 --> 00:01:38,190
[rhythmic thudding]
34
00:01:38,274 --> 00:01:39,776
Hey, stop it. Get off. Get...
[whining]
35
00:01:39,859 --> 00:01:43,237
Get off me. Goddamn it, Major.
[Major barks]
36
00:01:43,321 --> 00:01:44,823
[motorcycle rumbling]
[Vic] Hey, Frank!
37
00:01:44,906 --> 00:01:47,366
Hey, you got big plans for the weekend?
38
00:01:47,450 --> 00:01:50,829
I'm taking my boat to the lake,
gonna do a little wave humping.
39
00:01:50,912 --> 00:01:54,165
[sighs] You should come along and, uh...
we'll do some humping together.
40
00:01:54,248 --> 00:01:56,250
Right on!
41
00:01:56,334 --> 00:01:59,754
Oh, hiya, honey. Mm.
How was your day?
42
00:01:59,838 --> 00:02:03,382
Ah, it was a rough one. I had to
help Ed's widow clean out his locker.
43
00:02:03,466 --> 00:02:06,240
- Oh, that poor woman.
- One minute everything's fine,
44
00:02:06,241 --> 00:02:08,086
Ed's walking around the tarmac with his
45
00:02:08,087 --> 00:02:09,931
head attached to his
body like it always is.
46
00:02:10,015 --> 00:02:12,517
The next thing you know... Ugh.
47
00:02:12,600 --> 00:02:16,646
- Chair.
- The dick-tator has spoken.
48
00:02:16,729 --> 00:02:19,024
Oh, don't start with me,
you fuckin' disappointment.
49
00:02:19,107 --> 00:02:21,567
I had to hose a man's face off
the tarmac today, all right?
50
00:02:21,651 --> 00:02:23,778
I need a little peace. TV.
51
00:02:24,236 --> 00:02:26,739
[gunfire on TV]
52
00:02:28,282 --> 00:02:29,450
Damn, Colt!
53
00:02:29,534 --> 00:02:31,911
Them Fong Brothers are
gonna turn you into teriyaki!
54
00:02:31,995 --> 00:02:34,622
- They'll try, Fruity.
- What you gonna do?
55
00:02:34,706 --> 00:02:38,543
Sometimes a man's gotta do... what
a man does. [cracking knuckles]
56
00:02:39,752 --> 00:02:40,795
Hold this.
57
00:02:44,549 --> 00:02:47,760
You a rearry bad man, Cort Ruger!
58
00:02:47,844 --> 00:02:49,512
Kung fu!
59
00:02:49,595 --> 00:02:52,098
You two dumplings are
about to get pan-fried.
60
00:02:52,182 --> 00:02:53,599
No substitutions.
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00:02:54,475 --> 00:02:55,852
[men yelling]
62
00:02:55,935 --> 00:02:58,980
Oh, no! Me being burned alive!
63
00:02:59,064 --> 00:03:01,941
And once again, justice is served.
64
00:03:02,483 --> 00:03:05,070
How can you watch this?
It's barbaric.
65
00:03:05,153 --> 00:03:07,989
It's art. Beautiful, beautiful art.
[man on TV screams]
66
00:03:08,073 --> 00:03:09,991
My skin is bubbling!
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00:03:10,075 --> 00:03:12,340
Hey, I got an idea.
If you don't like this,
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00:03:12,375 --> 00:03:15,205
go to your room and watch
whatever you want on your TV.
69
00:03:15,287 --> 00:03:17,351
Oh, that's right, you don't have one
70
00:03:17,398 --> 00:03:20,292
'cause it's my fuckin' house. [cackles]
71
00:03:20,376 --> 00:03:22,962
That's real funny, Dad.
You know what else is funny?
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00:03:23,046 --> 00:03:26,132
- Aside from your haircut? What?
- [Kevin] This.
73
00:03:26,216 --> 00:03:28,009
- Bella Abzug?
- No.
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00:03:28,676 --> 00:03:31,387
- This!
- What the hell is this?
75
00:03:31,470 --> 00:03:34,182
- Kevin!
- He's flunking out and you knew about this?
76
00:03:34,265 --> 00:03:38,103
- I wanted your food to settle!
- Unbelievable. Unbelievable!
77
00:03:38,186 --> 00:03:41,189
You got one job: pay attention
and pass your classes.
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00:03:41,272 --> 00:03:44,358
- That's two jobs!
- No son of mine is gonna flunk out.
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00:03:44,442 --> 00:03:46,236
I don't care. I hate school!
80
00:03:46,318 --> 00:03:48,362
Well, I hate my life,
but I keep on doing it!
81
00:03:48,446 --> 00:03:50,615
I got a mortgage, I got dependents,
82
00:03:50,698 --> 00:03:54,493
and I gotta go downtown every
damn day to run that airport!
83
00:03:54,577 --> 00:03:57,363
Please, you're just a baggage handler.
84
00:04:02,168 --> 00:04:05,279
What the fuck did you just call me?
85
00:04:05,797 --> 00:04:06,923
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
86
00:04:07,006 --> 00:04:10,635
Frank, go hit your boxing bag.
Kevin, room.
87
00:04:12,386 --> 00:04:14,180
[door opens]
[Frank] Ah, shit!
88
00:04:14,264 --> 00:04:16,515
Who the fuck puts a car in a garage?
89
00:04:16,599 --> 00:04:19,644
I'm sorry, I thought you
were gonna be happy tonight.
90
00:04:19,727 --> 00:04:21,395
Never assume that!
91
00:04:21,479 --> 00:04:24,064
[up-tempo song playing]
92
00:04:57,723 --> 00:05:00,268
[grunts, screams]
93
00:05:06,345 --> 00:05:09,526
1x02 - "Saturday Bloody Saturday"
94
00:05:09,527 --> 00:05:11,904
[birds twittering]
95
00:05:12,655 --> 00:05:14,240
Oh... [sighing]
96
00:05:14,324 --> 00:05:18,048
- This is nice, Sue.
- Mm. Can you even remember
97
00:05:18,083 --> 00:05:21,998
the last time we just spent
a whole Saturday in bed?
98
00:05:22,081 --> 00:05:24,542
[Maureen shouts] Dad!
99
00:05:24,625 --> 00:05:26,252
Nope.
100
00:05:26,961 --> 00:05:28,004
Here we go.
101
00:05:28,087 --> 00:05:30,298
- Frank.
- What?
102
00:05:30,381 --> 00:05:34,260
- As beautiful as it is...
- [chuckles] Right.
103
00:05:38,139 --> 00:05:40,725
Ew. Daddy, Bill flicked
his cereal at me.
104
00:05:40,808 --> 00:05:42,643
- Knock it off, Bill.
- She started it.
105
00:05:42,727 --> 00:05:46,105
Well, I started you, and I can end you.
Be nice to your sister.
106
00:05:46,189 --> 00:05:48,733
Someday you'll be sleeping on her
couch after your first divorce.
107
00:05:48,816 --> 00:05:51,339
Frank, I know you have some
things to do today, but please
108
00:05:51,340 --> 00:05:53,863
don't forget, this is my big
day to organize the orders.
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00:05:53,946 --> 00:05:55,031
Oh, right. I'm on it.
110
00:05:58,117 --> 00:05:59,326
Kids, don't bother your mom today.
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00:05:59,327 --> 00:06:00,995
She's got important
work to do, packing up
112
00:06:00,996 --> 00:06:02,663
that shit she sells
around the neighborhood.
113
00:06:02,747 --> 00:06:05,415
- It's called Plast-A-Ware!
- You're right. Plast-A-Ware.
114
00:06:05,499 --> 00:06:07,919
So while Mommy's busy
with her little hobby...
115
00:06:08,002 --> 00:06:10,338
- It's a job!
- Yes, fine, a job.
116
00:06:10,420 --> 00:06:13,465
...I need you two to play nice with
each other and don't get in any trouble.
117
00:06:13,549 --> 00:06:15,425
And I am putting you in
charge of your sister today.
118
00:06:15,509 --> 00:06:16,510
- You got that?
- Yep.
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00:06:16,594 --> 00:06:20,181
Okay, if anything bad happens to her,
I want you to call me at work.
120
00:06:20,265 --> 00:06:21,599
- Okay, buddy?
- Sure, Dad.
121
00:06:21,682 --> 00:06:23,726
Good, 'cause then I
will come right home,
122
00:06:23,809 --> 00:06:26,229
and I will put you
through that fuckin' wall.
123
00:06:26,312 --> 00:06:28,815
Have a great day, princess.
124
00:06:29,107 --> 00:06:31,650
- Dad put me in charge of you.
- Good for you.
125
00:06:31,734 --> 00:06:33,903
- So you have to do what I say.
- Okay.
126
00:06:33,986 --> 00:06:36,781
- Can I go get my coloring book?
- Yes, you can.
127
00:06:36,864 --> 00:06:38,283
Thanks.
128
00:06:38,366 --> 00:06:40,326
This is easy.
[door slams]
129
00:06:43,871 --> 00:06:45,039
Maureen!
130
00:06:45,123 --> 00:06:47,250
[bike bell jingles]
[Maureen] See you later, stupid!
131
00:06:47,333 --> 00:06:49,459
Ah, shit!
132
00:06:50,128 --> 00:06:52,171
[snoring]
133
00:06:54,215 --> 00:06:57,558
- Hey. Get up, son.
- [sleepy voice] Oh, come on,
134
00:06:57,593 --> 00:07:00,012
I was having a dream about
not being part of this family.
135
00:07:00,096 --> 00:07:01,639
That's great.
Come on. It's important.
136
00:07:04,058 --> 00:07:05,101
Where you taking me?
137
00:07:09,897 --> 00:07:12,483
Hey, Frank! She wouldn't leave.
138
00:07:12,566 --> 00:07:15,369
- Capricorns, right?
- Ah, that guy.
139
00:07:18,572 --> 00:07:19,573
Where we going?
140
00:07:21,284 --> 00:07:22,534
I'm not getting a haircut.
141
00:07:24,578 --> 00:07:26,914
Look, I'm sorry I'm flunking out,
but History's not my fault.
142
00:07:26,998 --> 00:07:29,834
I wasn't gonna say this,
but Mr. Hackett's a perv.
143
00:07:29,917 --> 00:07:32,628
Like, a major perv. He's
always brushing up against me.
144
00:07:32,711 --> 00:07:34,955
I'm pretty sure I gave him a boner.
145
00:07:40,052 --> 00:07:43,555
Look, I realize no matter how much I yell
and scream, you're never gonna change.
146
00:07:43,639 --> 00:07:46,851
You're not gonna do better in school,
and your mother and I have accepted that.
147
00:07:46,934 --> 00:07:48,477
We're not gonna fight
you on this anymore.
148
00:07:48,478 --> 00:07:50,021
So I guess you're done with school.
149
00:07:50,104 --> 00:07:51,814
And you know what? That's fine.
150
00:07:51,897 --> 00:07:56,402
- Oh. Cool.
- So we decided to sell you to the Army.
151
00:07:56,486 --> 00:07:57,611
- What?
- Yep.
152
00:07:57,695 --> 00:08:00,695
- You are going to Vietnam.
- What?
153
00:08:02,033 --> 00:08:05,119
It's called "Troubled Youths To
Southeast Asia," or something like that.
154
00:08:05,203 --> 00:08:08,039
- It's an early-induction program.
- What the hell are you talking about?!
155
00:08:08,122 --> 00:08:11,125
Good, good, that's great. Get all
that attitude outta your system now,
156
00:08:11,209 --> 00:08:14,170
because your commanding officer's
probably not gonna stand for it.
157
00:08:14,253 --> 00:08:15,963
You can't do this to me. It isn't legal.
158
00:08:16,047 --> 00:08:19,133
Yeah, it is. It's a new program.
A lot of parents are really excited about it.
159
00:08:19,217 --> 00:08:21,302
It's a "can't lose."
You're done with school,
160
00:08:21,386 --> 00:08:23,388
and we might get a nice
folded flag out of it.
161
00:08:23,471 --> 00:08:25,494
Ah, would you look at
that. Hey, we better hurry,
162
00:08:25,495 --> 00:08:27,517
your flight to Saigon leaves in an hour.
163
00:08:27,599 --> 00:08:29,894
This is bullshit!
Where are you taking me?!
164
00:08:29,977 --> 00:08:32,604
Where are you taking me?!
165
00:08:44,616 --> 00:08:45,951
[inhaling]
166
00:08:46,035 --> 00:08:49,080
Mm... [sighs]
here we go!
167
00:08:49,163 --> 00:08:51,749
You can't do this to me!
Wait, I'll be good!
168
00:08:51,832 --> 00:08:54,313
- Father, please!
- Oh, and if you see a six-year-old
169
00:08:54,314 --> 00:08:57,671
running away from you, he's
about to compromise your position.
170
00:08:57,755 --> 00:09:00,758
So, what you want to do is shoot
him right in the back of the head.
171
00:09:00,841 --> 00:09:03,177
A brain stem shot. All right?
And don't worry, don't worry,
172
00:09:03,261 --> 00:09:04,970
- everything's fair game over there.
- No!
173
00:09:05,054 --> 00:09:07,806
You hold him up on your
bayonet for the others to see.
174
00:09:07,890 --> 00:09:11,185
- It's all about sending a message.
- [sobbing] I want to go home, Daddy!
175
00:09:11,269 --> 00:09:13,479
Ah, we all want to go home, Kevin.
176
00:09:13,563 --> 00:09:16,232
But sometimes you have to
destroy an entire culture first
177
00:09:16,315 --> 00:09:18,817
before that's possible.
And I'll tell you right now,
178
00:09:18,901 --> 00:09:21,003
if the Vietnamese are
anything like the Koreans,
179
00:09:21,004 --> 00:09:24,698
- they're very tough to de-bone.
- No, please! I'm so sorry!
180
00:09:24,782 --> 00:09:26,992
I don't even know what a brain stem is!
181
00:09:27,076 --> 00:09:29,787
I'll work hard in school!
I'll be good, okay?
182
00:09:29,870 --> 00:09:31,997
D-D-Don't send me to Vietnam!
183
00:09:32,081 --> 00:09:35,334
Jesus Christ, Kevin.
You're not going to Vietnam.
184
00:09:35,418 --> 00:09:37,169
What? I'm not?
185
00:09:37,253 --> 00:09:39,755
You really think they'd
take a 14-year-old flunky?
186
00:09:39,838 --> 00:09:41,799
They only take 18-year-old flunkies.
187
00:09:41,882 --> 00:09:44,935
Seriously? That's so fucked up!
188
00:09:45,344 --> 00:09:47,138
[Frank] You are gonna
spend the day with me.
189
00:09:47,221 --> 00:09:50,099
So you see what I do to put food
on the table for this family.
190
00:09:50,182 --> 00:09:52,810
Then maybe you'll learn to
have just a little more respect
191
00:09:52,893 --> 00:09:55,521
for your "just a
baggage handler" father.
192
00:09:55,605 --> 00:09:58,857
Ah! Piece of shit! Goddamn it!
[door slams]
193
00:09:58,941 --> 00:10:02,153
All right, where's Mohican Airways
flying you two today?
194
00:10:02,236 --> 00:10:04,696
- [woman] Syracuse.
- Syracuse, New York!
195
00:10:04,780 --> 00:10:08,576
Jewel of the Hudson Valley!
Here you go, young man, gate 12.
196
00:10:08,659 --> 00:10:10,786
- Thank you.
- [chuckles] Thank you!
197
00:10:14,123 --> 00:10:16,501
Cheap ass Syracuse motherfuckers.
198
00:10:17,209 --> 00:10:18,919
Hope your plane gets hijacked.
199
00:10:19,003 --> 00:10:21,380
- Hey, what do you say, Rosie?
- Hey, Frank.
200
00:10:21,464 --> 00:10:25,259
- You remember my boy, Kevin, right?
- Oh, hey, kid. You've grown.
201
00:10:25,343 --> 00:10:27,219
What are you in,
seventh, eighth grade now?
202
00:10:27,303 --> 00:10:29,305
- [scoffs] Try ninth.
- Shit.
203
00:10:29,388 --> 00:10:33,601
Time sure flies when
you work 51 weeks a year.
204
00:10:33,684 --> 00:10:35,603
Where are you fine ladies headed to?
205
00:10:35,686 --> 00:10:37,563
- Let's go, genius.
- [woman] Sandusky.
206
00:10:37,647 --> 00:10:40,065
- Sandusky, Ohio!
- [mutters] Stupid sarcasm from Dad.
207
00:10:40,149 --> 00:10:42,631
Gotta hang out with him all day. Sucks!
208
00:10:44,362 --> 00:10:47,406
Maureen! Maureen!
209
00:10:47,490 --> 00:10:48,782
Where are you?
210
00:10:48,866 --> 00:10:50,326
[Maureen giggles]
[glass shatters]
211
00:10:54,330 --> 00:10:56,874
Nice! Let's try this big fucker.
212
00:10:56,957 --> 00:10:58,501
Don't throw that!
213
00:10:58,584 --> 00:11:01,003
If Maureen gets hurt,
my dad's gonna kill me!
214
00:11:01,086 --> 00:11:04,590
- I won't get hurt.
- It's okay, we's insulated.
215
00:11:04,674 --> 00:11:09,080
- I think I'm allergic to my pink pillow.
- This is stupid.
216
00:11:09,115 --> 00:11:11,305
Let's just play something
where Maureen won't get hurt.
217
00:11:11,389 --> 00:11:12,722
OK.
[groans]
218
00:11:12,806 --> 00:11:16,101
Ah, shit!
Why does this hurt so much?
219
00:11:16,185 --> 00:11:20,113
Should've worn a cup, like me.
[chuckles]
220
00:11:21,524 --> 00:11:23,609
[Frank] Now let me show you where you
221
00:11:23,610 --> 00:11:26,737
can get in life when you stay
in school. This right here
222
00:11:26,738 --> 00:11:29,865
is what you call the "nerve center"
of the whole operation.
223
00:11:30,740 --> 00:11:32,680
You recognize that handwriting?
224
00:11:32,681 --> 00:11:37,039
- That's me. I made out that schedule.
- Gee, Pop, that's cool.
225
00:11:37,122 --> 00:11:40,903
It's not "cool." It's important.
Just like air traffic control.
226
00:11:40,938 --> 00:11:42,878
It's all about sequencing and spacing.
227
00:11:42,961 --> 00:11:45,214
- [scoffs] Of lunch?
- No, of everything.
228
00:11:45,297 --> 00:11:47,883
Without that schedule, the
bags don't get off the planes
229
00:11:47,966 --> 00:11:51,303
and the whole airport grinds to a halt.
That leads to a domino effect.
230
00:11:51,387 --> 00:11:54,098
Every airport closes.
Then anarchy sets in.
231
00:11:54,181 --> 00:11:57,059
- Food lines grow...
- Dad, it's not that big of a deal.
232
00:11:57,142 --> 00:11:59,645
Yeah? Talk to me when we're
eating the fucking dog for supper!
233
00:11:59,729 --> 00:12:02,648
[man shouts over PA]
Murphy! My office! Now!
234
00:12:02,732 --> 00:12:05,859
All right, that's the big boss.
I'll be right back. You stay here.
235
00:12:05,943 --> 00:12:08,320
Do not move your ass from this spot.
You understand me, Einstein?
236
00:12:08,404 --> 00:12:11,990
- All right. Yeah, Dad, I got it.
- Okay, I'll be right back.
237
00:12:12,074 --> 00:12:16,203
[door closes]
[singsong] # Fuck you. #
238
00:12:18,015 --> 00:12:19,289
_
239
00:12:19,290 --> 00:12:21,709
No fucking door's gonna
tell me what to do.
240
00:12:23,511 --> 00:12:25,496
[horn beeps]
Ah, shit!
241
00:12:32,261 --> 00:12:34,138
Mm-hm. Hm. Hm.
242
00:12:36,515 --> 00:12:38,768
Ooh. You're a bad one.
243
00:12:42,104 --> 00:12:44,273
See? This is fun, right?
244
00:12:44,356 --> 00:12:45,983
- I guess.
- And it's safe.
245
00:12:46,066 --> 00:12:47,985
- You guys ready?
- All ready.
246
00:12:48,068 --> 00:12:50,245
Hold your girl balls!
247
00:12:51,447 --> 00:12:53,532
[giggling]
248
00:12:55,451 --> 00:12:58,203
[gasps, grunting]
249
00:12:58,287 --> 00:12:59,622
[tires screeching]
250
00:13:01,999 --> 00:13:03,125
Shit!
251
00:13:03,208 --> 00:13:07,879
- Maureen! I killed her.
- I want to do it again!
252
00:13:07,963 --> 00:13:10,675
No! I don't care if
you die, but Dad does.
253
00:13:10,758 --> 00:13:13,594
- I'm not afraid of anything.
- Are you all right, Maureen?
254
00:13:13,678 --> 00:13:15,554
The Nazi knows my name!
255
00:13:15,638 --> 00:13:16,806
[kids screaming]
256
00:13:16,888 --> 00:13:20,058
Ah! The joy of children at play.
257
00:13:23,020 --> 00:13:24,313
[knocking]
[door opens]
258
00:13:24,396 --> 00:13:27,426
- You, uh, wanted to see me, Bob?
- Sit down.
259
00:13:27,427 --> 00:13:30,709
[loud, labored breathing]
260
00:13:33,531 --> 00:13:37,207
Frank, it was a horrible
way for you to get Ed's job,
261
00:13:37,236 --> 00:13:40,454
God rest his soul, but
everything happens for a reason
262
00:13:40,538 --> 00:13:44,458
and I know you're the guy
to turn this department around.
263
00:13:44,542 --> 00:13:46,043
Thank you.
264
00:13:46,126 --> 00:13:50,047
To be honest with you, Ed
lost control of his crew.
265
00:13:50,130 --> 00:13:53,300
You see how they've been acting
out there? [sputtering cough]
266
00:13:53,384 --> 00:13:56,846
Oh, did I get you?
There's no discipline anymore.
267
00:13:56,928 --> 00:14:01,809
So you're the new sheriff and I'm
counting on you to lay down the law.
268
00:14:02,768 --> 00:14:06,564
Good skin.
They should make a chicken just of skin.
269
00:14:06,647 --> 00:14:09,650
I'd buy that. Everybody'd buy that.
270
00:14:09,734 --> 00:14:13,028
To tell you the truth, we were
getting ready to let Ed go anyway.
271
00:14:13,111 --> 00:14:18,033
So this terrible accident was
kind of a blessing in disguise.
272
00:14:18,116 --> 00:14:20,285
[grunting, gasping]
273
00:14:20,369 --> 00:14:21,995
[groaning]
274
00:14:23,873 --> 00:14:26,500
One good thing has come
out of this tragedy.
275
00:14:26,584 --> 00:14:30,462
From now on, if you're
wearing a tie on the tarmac,
276
00:14:30,546 --> 00:14:34,299
- it's gotta be a clip-on.
- That's a nice way to honor his memory.
277
00:14:34,383 --> 00:14:38,241
So listen, I'm hearing some
rumblings that Rosie and
278
00:14:38,242 --> 00:14:42,099
the baggage handlers are
thinking of going on strike.
279
00:14:42,182 --> 00:14:46,687
I'm really counting on you to
make sure your men understand
280
00:14:46,771 --> 00:14:50,357
that wouldn't be in
anybody's best interest.
281
00:14:50,441 --> 00:14:51,508
Oh, they're not gonna strike.
282
00:14:51,509 --> 00:14:55,195
- They're my guys. They're reasonable.
- That's good.
283
00:14:55,230 --> 00:14:59,032
Because just between you
and me and these pieces of poultry,
284
00:14:59,116 --> 00:15:01,786
a strike would kill this airline.
285
00:15:01,869 --> 00:15:05,539
Times are tough.
Inflation. Recession.
286
00:15:05,623 --> 00:15:09,418
Oil embargo.
We're all in this together.
287
00:15:09,501 --> 00:15:11,044
If one side...
288
00:15:11,128 --> 00:15:15,966
Oh, for Christ's sake, this
bucket's only got three biscuits!
289
00:15:16,049 --> 00:15:17,968
It's supposed to have four!
290
00:15:18,051 --> 00:15:20,596
That's what's wrong with
this country! [bucket thuds]
291
00:15:21,639 --> 00:15:24,391
[grunts] Oh, here it is.
292
00:15:25,183 --> 00:15:31,118
You're in management now, Frank,
and we take care of our own. Here.
293
00:15:31,523 --> 00:15:35,451
We'd like you to have
these, courtesy of our CEO,
294
00:15:35,452 --> 00:15:38,071
Roger Dunbarton himself. [grunts]
295
00:15:38,155 --> 00:15:41,784
These are for the game next
Sunday. Corporate seats!
296
00:15:41,867 --> 00:15:44,787
Enjoy them.
You're on our team now.
297
00:15:44,870 --> 00:15:46,789
I know you'll come through for us
298
00:15:46,872 --> 00:15:50,542
and shut down any of this
crazy talk about a strike.
299
00:15:50,626 --> 00:15:55,172
- I can count on you, right?
- [clears throat] Uh... Yes. Yes, sir.
300
00:15:55,255 --> 00:15:58,142
- All right, Frank, we're done here.
- Thanks, Bob.
301
00:16:00,928 --> 00:16:03,463
I'm not a stander, Frank.
302
00:16:05,641 --> 00:16:07,852
Bang it harder, man!
[man grunts]
303
00:16:07,935 --> 00:16:09,269
I'm trying, I'm trying!
304
00:16:09,353 --> 00:16:11,271
Come on, you son of a bitch. Come on!
305
00:16:11,355 --> 00:16:13,524
Come on, you little fuckers!
306
00:16:13,607 --> 00:16:17,194
Ho-ho! All right, high tar!
307
00:16:17,277 --> 00:16:19,196
- Makes your dick hard.
- Oh, hey, man.
308
00:16:19,279 --> 00:16:20,739
It's not stealing if you're on a break.
309
00:16:20,823 --> 00:16:24,159
- Oh, shit, that's Frank's kid.
- Are you gonna tell your dad on us?
310
00:16:24,242 --> 00:16:27,329
My dad's a dildo. Now how
about one of those cigarettes?
311
00:16:27,412 --> 00:16:30,081
- All right.
- Yeah. [chuckles]
312
00:16:40,091 --> 00:16:41,092
There.
313
00:16:41,844 --> 00:16:42,970
All done.
314
00:16:43,053 --> 00:16:46,974
[sighs] Now I'm free to
enjoy the rest of my day.
315
00:16:47,057 --> 00:16:51,255
[clock ticking]
[faucet dripping]
316
00:16:54,023 --> 00:16:57,010
[ticking echoes]
317
00:17:11,206 --> 00:17:14,042
[sobbing]
318
00:17:19,715 --> 00:17:22,175
[wailing]
319
00:17:23,761 --> 00:17:27,138
[muffled sobs]
[whining]
320
00:17:28,348 --> 00:17:31,393
[sobbing] Oh, God!
321
00:17:36,815 --> 00:17:39,651
Get out of here!
Leave me alone!
322
00:17:39,735 --> 00:17:41,445
Get out! Ew!
323
00:17:42,654 --> 00:17:44,531
All right, Einstein. Up and at 'em!
324
00:17:45,699 --> 00:17:47,242
Ah, shit!
325
00:17:48,535 --> 00:17:50,037
[horn beeps]
[gasps]
326
00:17:51,496 --> 00:17:52,873
Maureen!
327
00:17:52,957 --> 00:17:56,209
You said you'd only climb
to the first big branch!
328
00:17:56,293 --> 00:17:58,420
When are you gonna realize I'm a liar?
329
00:17:58,503 --> 00:18:00,505
Hey, look, free eggs!
330
00:18:01,256 --> 00:18:04,217
Yuck. Somebody put a bird in this one!
331
00:18:04,301 --> 00:18:06,511
Maureen, get down now!
332
00:18:06,595 --> 00:18:08,831
[singsong] # I can't hear you #
333
00:18:08,866 --> 00:18:10,170
[yelling]
[gasps]
334
00:18:13,018 --> 00:18:14,394
[thudding]
335
00:18:14,478 --> 00:18:16,814
So he forces me to come
with him on his day off
336
00:18:16,897 --> 00:18:18,607
to learn respect for what he does.
337
00:18:18,690 --> 00:18:22,903
And it's all 'cause he spazzed out
when I started flunking a few classes.
338
00:18:22,987 --> 00:18:23,862
[coughs]
339
00:18:23,946 --> 00:18:28,033
Fuck school! Whoa!
That'd be a great name for a porno.
340
00:18:28,117 --> 00:18:30,452
Look at that, I didn't
even finish tenth grade
341
00:18:30,535 --> 00:18:32,913
and I just came up with
an idea for a movie.
342
00:18:32,997 --> 00:18:36,291
People still go to
school, but they fuck.
343
00:18:36,374 --> 00:18:38,877
I'd watch that.
Everybody would watch that.
344
00:18:38,961 --> 00:18:42,547
Carl, check it out! This
one just came in from Boston.
345
00:18:43,173 --> 00:18:45,342
"Lewis Futon." Nice.
346
00:18:45,425 --> 00:18:47,636
She's probably banging
the mayor. [chortles]
347
00:18:47,719 --> 00:18:50,263
Better put it on the belt. Oops!
348
00:18:50,347 --> 00:18:51,974
Missed the belt!
349
00:18:52,057 --> 00:18:55,602
"Leonora Pender."
Oh, you dirty pill-billy.
350
00:18:55,686 --> 00:18:58,105
- What are they?
- Only one way to find out.
351
00:18:58,188 --> 00:19:01,817
And that's why they call it
"experimenting" with drugs.
352
00:19:03,318 --> 00:19:06,321
- Whoa. Can I have some?
- Dude, you're a kid!
353
00:19:06,404 --> 00:19:08,323
You can only have one.
354
00:19:09,366 --> 00:19:10,367
Whoa.
355
00:19:10,450 --> 00:19:13,237
- You're gonna be a great father.
- Thanks, man.
356
00:19:15,455 --> 00:19:18,000
- Rosie, you seen my kid?
- Thought he was with you.
357
00:19:18,083 --> 00:19:20,836
Ah, geez. Kid's gonna put
me six feet under. Thanks.
358
00:19:20,919 --> 00:19:22,203
Frank, real quick, real quick.
359
00:19:22,204 --> 00:19:24,131
What did Bob Pogo want
to talk to you about?
360
00:19:24,214 --> 00:19:26,758
Well, uh... he was missing a biscuit.
361
00:19:26,842 --> 00:19:28,969
[laughing]
362
00:19:29,887 --> 00:19:32,165
I didn't do it!
363
00:19:33,306 --> 00:19:35,684
Anyway, what did he want, Frank?
364
00:19:35,767 --> 00:19:38,687
Pogo was just, you know, he
doesn't want you to go on strike.
365
00:19:38,770 --> 00:19:40,605
And look, I know you guys got a beef.
366
00:19:40,689 --> 00:19:42,440
They shouldn't be
cutting your overtime pay.
367
00:19:42,524 --> 00:19:46,132
Exactly. It isn't right. I mean,
we're busting our asses out here.
368
00:19:46,133 --> 00:19:47,738
How much money they gotta make?
369
00:19:47,821 --> 00:19:51,867
We're not asking for a lot, man, you
know, just spread it around a little bit.
370
00:19:51,950 --> 00:19:53,368
I mean, you understand, right?
371
00:19:53,451 --> 00:19:56,371
Rosie, you know I got your back.
I'll always be one of you guys.
372
00:19:56,454 --> 00:19:59,499
If this shit goes down,
we can count on you, right?
373
00:19:59,583 --> 00:20:01,292
Yeah, Rosie. Of course you can.
374
00:20:01,376 --> 00:20:04,254
- Good.
- I better go find my kid.
375
00:20:04,337 --> 00:20:08,013
Hey, I hope Pogo didn't eat him!
[both laughing]
376
00:20:08,050 --> 00:20:10,572
He's too lean, though, right?
[chuckles]
377
00:20:10,844 --> 00:20:14,806
- Ah...
- Excuse me, are you the manager here?
378
00:20:14,890 --> 00:20:17,184
Why, yes, ma'am, I am.
How can I help you?
379
00:20:17,267 --> 00:20:18,894
Don't you backtalk me!
380
00:20:22,689 --> 00:20:25,109
- Are you all right?
- Do you want my pillow?
381
00:20:25,192 --> 00:20:28,445
- Get away from her!
- I... can't... breathe!
382
00:20:28,528 --> 00:20:30,239
You just got the wind
knocked out of you.
383
00:20:31,115 --> 00:20:33,825
I bet I can go higher this... time.
384
00:20:33,909 --> 00:20:37,454
Jesus Christ, Maureen,
what's wrong with you?!
385
00:20:37,537 --> 00:20:40,498
All day long, if it's not
one thing, it's another!
386
00:20:40,582 --> 00:20:42,626
I'm just trying to protect you!
387
00:20:42,709 --> 00:20:45,623
Do you have a death wish,
you stupid fuck?!
388
00:20:45,754 --> 00:20:47,714
[gasps, sniffles]
389
00:20:48,465 --> 00:20:51,468
Ah, shit. [sighs]
390
00:20:51,551 --> 00:20:54,763
I'm sorry. Okay. Okay.
391
00:20:54,846 --> 00:20:57,224
Can you walk, or do you
want me to carry you?
392
00:20:57,307 --> 00:21:03,063
[sniffles] I can walk, but I
still want you to carry me, okay?
393
00:21:11,321 --> 00:21:13,364
[Kevin] I know that guy.
That's my dad's boss.
394
00:21:13,448 --> 00:21:16,409
It is for about two more seconds.
[chuckling] Here he goes.
395
00:21:16,493 --> 00:21:19,913
Alive... alive... alive...
396
00:21:20,497 --> 00:21:21,331
[yells]
[men] Oh!
397
00:21:21,414 --> 00:21:23,708
- What happened to his head?!
- Just a second.
398
00:21:24,168 --> 00:21:25,543
Holy shit!
[men cackling]
399
00:21:25,627 --> 00:21:27,171
- I can't stop watching this.
- Oh, man!
400
00:21:27,254 --> 00:21:30,381
Look, look. Alive. Dead.
401
00:21:30,465 --> 00:21:32,259
Alive. Dead.
402
00:21:32,342 --> 00:21:33,760
Alive. Dead.
403
00:21:33,844 --> 00:21:35,512
I'm gonna put him back together. Oh!
404
00:21:35,595 --> 00:21:37,722
Now he's apart.
I use Head and Shoulders.
405
00:21:37,806 --> 00:21:39,808
Oops! Now just Shoulders.
[giggles]
406
00:21:39,891 --> 00:21:43,394
Oh, don't get ahead of yourself!
The Prince of Darkness says you live!
407
00:21:43,478 --> 00:21:44,855
Oh, no, you don't!
408
00:21:44,938 --> 00:21:47,899
Uh, my... dad's probably...
409
00:21:47,983 --> 00:21:50,235
- I should go find him.
- Okay, see ya.
410
00:21:50,319 --> 00:21:52,904
"I wear a tie because
I'm a professional."
411
00:21:52,988 --> 00:21:54,823
Not anymore.
[both cackling]
412
00:21:57,326 --> 00:22:00,495
I'm sorry you had to see
all that, but I'm fine now.
413
00:22:00,578 --> 00:22:03,540
Really, I am. I'm very happy.
414
00:22:03,623 --> 00:22:07,878
I mean, so what if all I really have is...
I'm a mom and a wife.
415
00:22:07,961 --> 00:22:10,964
And all I have outside
of that is Plast-A-Ware.
416
00:22:11,048 --> 00:22:14,009
But I'm happy.
I don't need anything else.
417
00:22:14,092 --> 00:22:16,803
No, no, no, don't go.
Here, more cheese.
418
00:22:18,096 --> 00:22:20,431
I'm really very happy.
419
00:22:20,515 --> 00:22:21,641
[door opens]
[Bill] Mom?
420
00:22:21,725 --> 00:22:24,393
We'll talk later.
Hang on, honey, Mommy's here!
421
00:22:24,477 --> 00:22:27,314
[stammers] Mrs. Pender,
I am so very sorry
422
00:22:27,396 --> 00:22:29,774
that something was lost
from your luggage in transit.
423
00:22:29,858 --> 00:22:34,071
It's not "something." It's my pills.
And they were in that bag!
424
00:22:34,154 --> 00:22:36,698
They're for my uterine lining!
425
00:22:36,781 --> 00:22:38,783
Are you sure you packed
them before you left Boston?
426
00:22:38,867 --> 00:22:42,954
Are you suggesting I'm senile,
you baggage jockey?
427
00:22:43,038 --> 00:22:44,998
This is your fault!
428
00:22:45,082 --> 00:22:49,169
You are an absolute disgrace
to this once-proud airline.
429
00:22:49,253 --> 00:22:51,213
And if you think I'm gonna stand...
430
00:22:51,296 --> 00:22:53,506
Whoa!
[men cackling]
431
00:22:53,590 --> 00:22:55,675
You should see the tape
the FAA confiscated.
432
00:22:55,759 --> 00:22:58,678
Ed's head rolled all the
way to runway two-niner.
433
00:22:59,428 --> 00:23:01,147
You guys should get back to work.
434
00:23:02,349 --> 00:23:05,518
Oh, man, I got the cramps something bad.
435
00:23:05,602 --> 00:23:10,107
- Really? Are your breasts tender?
- No, but I can't feel my balls!
436
00:23:10,190 --> 00:23:12,441
Murphy, ma'am. Frank Murphy.
437
00:23:12,525 --> 00:23:15,237
Well, Frank Murphy, you're
about to lose your job!
438
00:23:15,320 --> 00:23:19,991
Excuse me, sir? Um...
I don't know your name, obviously,
439
00:23:20,075 --> 00:23:23,494
but um, I found this bottle
by the baggage carousel
440
00:23:23,578 --> 00:23:25,622
and just thought it might be important?
441
00:23:25,705 --> 00:23:28,457
Oh. Uh...
Thank you, uh, young man.
442
00:23:28,541 --> 00:23:29,918
Mrs. Pender, here you are.
443
00:23:30,001 --> 00:23:33,213
Oh. Well, this still
doesn't excuse your rudeness.
444
00:23:33,297 --> 00:23:34,881
Ma'am, I am terribly sorry.
445
00:23:34,965 --> 00:23:37,092
It's 100 percent our fault.
I understand completely.
446
00:23:37,175 --> 00:23:41,012
And your complete lack of
professionalism and respect for...
447
00:23:41,096 --> 00:23:44,682
Excuse me, but um...
why don't you just...
448
00:23:44,766 --> 00:23:47,301
[yelling] shut the fuck up?!
449
00:24:02,033 --> 00:24:04,577
Kevin... you shouldn't have said that.
450
00:24:04,661 --> 00:24:08,397
That was very rude.
[laughing]
451
00:24:08,873 --> 00:24:11,542
And just because I'm laughing
doesn't make it right, okay?
452
00:24:11,626 --> 00:24:13,462
You should've shown
that lady some respect.
453
00:24:13,544 --> 00:24:17,799
- Why? She'll be dead in a week.
- Yeah, with any luck. [laughing]
454
00:24:17,882 --> 00:24:22,304
- She sure was pissed.
- Yeah, don't tell your mother!
455
00:24:22,305 --> 00:24:24,109
[both laughing]
456
00:24:24,181 --> 00:24:27,100
['70s rock music playing]
457
00:24:41,990 --> 00:24:44,284
[music continues]
458
00:24:44,368 --> 00:24:47,704
[turns down volume]
Doesn't that just rock your soul?
459
00:24:47,787 --> 00:24:50,040
I gotta tell ya, I-I just don't get it.
460
00:24:50,123 --> 00:24:53,293
Dad, you can't understand
progressive rock for the first time.
461
00:24:53,377 --> 00:24:56,833
- You gotta keep listening.
- No, I don't. When you get to be my age,
462
00:24:56,868 --> 00:24:58,340
you can recognize bullshit
right out of the gate.
463
00:24:58,423 --> 00:25:02,927
So listen, my boss gave me these
tickets to the game next Sunday.
464
00:25:03,011 --> 00:25:05,596
Corporate seats. You want to go?
465
00:25:05,680 --> 00:25:08,892
Really? Yeah, sure. Thanks, Dad.
466
00:25:08,975 --> 00:25:12,270
- Cool.
- Yeah. It'll be fun.
467
00:25:13,771 --> 00:25:16,233
Dad, I'm real sorry about my grades.
468
00:25:16,316 --> 00:25:20,320
I'm gonna stop goofing off and
make up all my assignments, I swear.
469
00:25:20,404 --> 00:25:23,031
Okay. Good.
That would really make me proud.
470
00:25:23,114 --> 00:25:25,325
And I'm glad you took
me to your job today.
471
00:25:25,409 --> 00:25:27,244
It really opened my eyes.
472
00:25:27,327 --> 00:25:29,662
I shouldn't have called you
"just a baggage handler."
473
00:25:29,746 --> 00:25:33,333
- What you do is... remarkable.
- Ah...
474
00:25:34,376 --> 00:25:39,172
- Thanks, son.
- I mean, what an awful job you have.
475
00:25:39,256 --> 00:25:42,780
Seriously, watching you just
have to stand there while
476
00:25:42,781 --> 00:25:46,304
that lady came down on you,
you were like a human urinal.
477
00:25:46,388 --> 00:25:49,266
- I was... I was embarrassed for you.
- Okay.
478
00:25:49,349 --> 00:25:51,600
I mean, like, the humiliation.
479
00:25:51,684 --> 00:25:53,937
- Your soul must be weeping.
- Got it.
480
00:25:54,020 --> 00:25:57,648
[Kevin] I don't know how the
human spirit can endure that.
481
00:25:57,732 --> 00:26:03,196
She was literally, like, shoveling
her own feces in your mouth.
482
00:26:03,280 --> 00:26:04,822
And you just kept eating it.
483
00:26:04,906 --> 00:26:07,409
- Yeah, you said that already.
- No, I said "urinal."
484
00:26:07,492 --> 00:26:10,161
Anyway, I don't know how you do it.
485
00:26:10,245 --> 00:26:11,662
Day in and day out...
[turns up volume]
486
00:26:11,746 --> 00:26:13,164
...humiliating yourself like that.
487
00:26:13,248 --> 00:26:16,293
[voice fading] Crushing your will
to go on, just to buy me shoes.
488
00:26:16,376 --> 00:26:18,462
And do I ever thank you for it?
489
00:26:18,545 --> 00:26:21,131
No. No, I don't...
490
00:26:22,340 --> 00:26:24,384
[controlled exhale]
491
00:26:24,969 --> 00:26:28,192
sync & correction by f1nc0
~ Addic7ed.com ~
492
00:26:51,995 --> 00:26:53,455
[gunshot]
[casing clatters]
493
00:26:53,505 --> 00:26:58,055
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