Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,089 --> 00:00:04,308
- Go, go, go,
go, go!
2
00:00:04,352 --> 00:00:05,527
Clear!
3
00:00:05,570 --> 00:00:07,007
[sighs]
4
00:00:07,050 --> 00:00:08,878
Okay, that never happens.
5
00:00:08,921 --> 00:00:11,576
That never happens.
That never happens.
6
00:00:11,620 --> 00:00:12,838
[grunts]
7
00:00:12,882 --> 00:00:15,102
- Your helmet's too big.
[laughs]
8
00:00:15,145 --> 00:00:17,321
- What's this?
- Oh, it's the new
9
00:00:17,365 --> 00:00:20,933
smoldering firefighter drama,
"Pamona FD."
10
00:00:20,977 --> 00:00:22,326
- What do you guys
watch the shows?
11
00:00:22,370 --> 00:00:24,459
All you do sit around
and complain.
12
00:00:24,502 --> 00:00:26,113
That air packs from the '90s.
13
00:00:26,156 --> 00:00:27,462
- Yeah, right.
- Don't they have
14
00:00:27,505 --> 00:00:28,985
a technical
consultant on this show?
15
00:00:29,029 --> 00:00:31,031
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Retired firefighter,
16
00:00:31,074 --> 00:00:32,771
rents, like,
a Mustang Convertible.
17
00:00:32,815 --> 00:00:34,121
Thinks he's hot shit.
Probably related
18
00:00:34,164 --> 00:00:35,383
to one of the creators
of the show.
19
00:00:35,426 --> 00:00:36,558
- [laughs] Probs.
- Yeah, probably.
20
00:00:36,601 --> 00:00:38,081
It's not even a real fire.
21
00:00:38,125 --> 00:00:39,735
- Look how much makeup
that girl's wearing.
22
00:00:39,778 --> 00:00:41,128
How come I can't get the suit
23
00:00:41,171 --> 00:00:42,651
to highlight my cheekbones
like that?
24
00:00:42,694 --> 00:00:43,739
- There he is taking
the shirt off again.
25
00:00:43,782 --> 00:00:44,783
And now they're making out
26
00:00:44,827 --> 00:00:46,350
in the middle of a fire.
27
00:00:46,394 --> 00:00:47,960
- Why do they think that life
in a fire station
28
00:00:48,004 --> 00:00:50,050
- is like a soap opera?
- It's so unrealistic.
29
00:00:50,093 --> 00:00:51,529
[explosion booms]
30
00:00:51,573 --> 00:00:54,532
[dramatic music]
31
00:00:54,576 --> 00:00:55,925
♪
32
00:00:55,968 --> 00:00:58,928
Guys...she's here.
33
00:00:58,971 --> 00:01:01,800
- Who is?
- [laughs]
34
00:01:01,844 --> 00:01:03,715
You're gonna wanna come
see for yourself.
35
00:01:03,759 --> 00:01:04,977
Trust me.
36
00:01:05,021 --> 00:01:07,980
[epic music]
37
00:01:08,024 --> 00:01:09,112
♪
38
00:01:09,156 --> 00:01:12,115
[Foreigner's "Hot Blooded"]
39
00:01:12,159 --> 00:01:18,426
♪
40
00:01:18,469 --> 00:01:21,124
- ♪ Well, I'm hot-blooded
41
00:01:21,168 --> 00:01:23,735
♪ Check it and see
42
00:01:23,779 --> 00:01:27,478
♪ I got a fever of 103
43
00:01:27,522 --> 00:01:29,915
♪ I'm hot-blooded
44
00:01:30,655 --> 00:01:33,136
♪
45
00:01:33,180 --> 00:01:36,705
- There she is, boys,
the Pedalton 3.0.
46
00:01:36,748 --> 00:01:39,055
- Finally, cardio
that doesn't suck.
47
00:01:39,099 --> 00:01:40,752
- That's their tagline.
It's on the box.
48
00:01:40,796 --> 00:01:42,711
- Wait, 1500 bucks
from Bulkshop?
49
00:01:42,754 --> 00:01:44,800
- Why would you get anything
from Bulkshop?
50
00:01:44,843 --> 00:01:45,975
- Because they have
great prices.
51
00:01:46,018 --> 00:01:48,064
No. Bulkshop sucks.
52
00:01:48,108 --> 00:01:49,457
- Yeesh.
- Whoa, damn.
53
00:01:49,500 --> 00:01:50,936
- Why does he
hate Bulkshop so much?
54
00:01:50,980 --> 00:01:53,591
- I know, right?
- Ooh, the Pedalton 3.0
55
00:01:53,635 --> 00:01:55,376
has everything, man.
56
00:01:55,419 --> 00:01:58,596
Prerecorded classes, live
classes, and special events.
57
00:01:58,640 --> 00:01:59,902
- Ooh, I feel bad
for the suckers
58
00:01:59,945 --> 00:02:01,382
who bought the Pedalton 2.0.
59
00:02:01,425 --> 00:02:02,905
- Suckers.
- Suckers.
60
00:02:02,948 --> 00:02:05,168
- Oh, wait,
when does the 4.0 come out?
61
00:02:05,212 --> 00:02:08,302
- Next month. But until then,
this is top of the line.
62
00:02:08,345 --> 00:02:09,738
- Ooh!
- Awesome!
63
00:02:09,781 --> 00:02:11,827
Ah-ta-ta-ta-ta.
Step aside, Bozo.
64
00:02:11,870 --> 00:02:13,785
I'm taking her
on her maiden voyage.
65
00:02:13,829 --> 00:02:15,613
- I call next.
- All right.
66
00:02:15,657 --> 00:02:17,049
Yes.
67
00:02:17,093 --> 00:02:18,573
I'll bet you wish
you got next.
68
00:02:18,616 --> 00:02:20,052
Not really.
69
00:02:21,750 --> 00:02:23,839
- Hi, I'm Anita Worthy,
and I'm gonna get you going
70
00:02:23,882 --> 00:02:24,970
on your new Pedalton.
71
00:02:25,014 --> 00:02:26,537
Hello, Anita.
72
00:02:26,581 --> 00:02:28,017
- You might be tempted
to talk to me,
73
00:02:28,060 --> 00:02:29,584
but this is a pre
recorded workout
74
00:02:29,627 --> 00:02:32,021
so I cannot hear you
or respond.
75
00:02:32,064 --> 00:02:33,457
Oh, okay. Sorry.
76
00:02:33,501 --> 00:02:34,850
I won't--
[laughs]
77
00:02:34,893 --> 00:02:36,286
Oh, you can't hear that,
either.
78
00:02:36,330 --> 00:02:39,071
What am I doing?
Stop it, Ike.
79
00:02:39,115 --> 00:02:40,203
Sorry, Anita. Shit!
80
00:02:40,247 --> 00:02:41,900
[laughs]
You can't hear that.
81
00:02:41,944 --> 00:02:43,815
All right, gang. Let's go!
82
00:02:43,859 --> 00:02:45,121
all: Whoo!
83
00:02:45,165 --> 00:02:46,644
♪
84
00:02:46,688 --> 00:02:48,559
- [knock at door]
- Hey, I got awesome news.
85
00:02:48,603 --> 00:02:50,082
You know how the city's been
trying to buy my house
86
00:02:50,126 --> 00:02:51,606
so they can build
a new hospital?
87
00:02:51,649 --> 00:02:53,695
Well, I've been holding it up
for a year,
88
00:02:53,738 --> 00:02:55,044
and they finally made an offer.
89
00:02:55,087 --> 00:02:56,654
A million bucks.
[typing]
90
00:02:56,698 --> 00:02:58,395
Hey, did you hear what I said?
91
00:02:58,439 --> 00:03:00,049
The city wants to give me
a million bucks for my house.
92
00:03:00,092 --> 00:03:01,920
- [sighs] Okay.
What are you talking about?
93
00:03:01,964 --> 00:03:04,358
- What's going on with you?
- Vicky's pissed at me.
94
00:03:04,401 --> 00:03:06,229
We were binge watching a show
together on Hulu.
95
00:03:06,273 --> 00:03:07,883
- Mm.
- I watched the last
96
00:03:07,926 --> 00:03:09,798
- five episodes without her.
- Big mistake. What show?
97
00:03:09,841 --> 00:03:12,583
- It's a show about the Irish
couple, Jenny and John O'Cake.
98
00:03:12,627 --> 00:03:14,542
They join the Peace Corps
and solve crimes.
99
00:03:14,585 --> 00:03:16,196
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
"Peace O'Cake."
100
00:03:16,239 --> 00:03:17,719
- Great show.
- So good.
101
00:03:17,762 --> 00:03:19,286
- Great show.
- They planted a potato farm
102
00:03:19,329 --> 00:03:20,939
- in an African village.
- That's the best part
103
00:03:20,983 --> 00:03:22,158
- of the season right there.
- Then someone stole
104
00:03:22,202 --> 00:03:23,725
- the potatoes.
- And that's all
105
00:03:23,768 --> 00:03:25,248
- in the first episode.
- They solved it, though.
106
00:03:25,292 --> 00:03:26,423
- Yeah, of course.
- You wanna know why?
107
00:03:26,467 --> 00:03:27,816
- Why?
- It was a Piece O'Cake.
108
00:03:27,859 --> 00:03:29,383
- Yeah, yeah, yeah,
it's so good.
109
00:03:29,426 --> 00:03:30,862
- Oh, it was so good.
- Yeah. Well, I don't
110
00:03:30,906 --> 00:03:32,255
blame her, you know,
when you exchanged
111
00:03:32,299 --> 00:03:33,343
those marital vows
with my sister,
112
00:03:33,387 --> 00:03:34,866
you swore an oath of fidelity.
113
00:03:34,910 --> 00:03:36,128
- They didn't have binge
cheating back then.
114
00:03:36,172 --> 00:03:37,739
- Eh.
- All right, so what's
115
00:03:37,782 --> 00:03:39,131
- this thing with the city?
- They're offering me
116
00:03:39,175 --> 00:03:40,611
a million bucks for my house.
[laughs]
117
00:03:40,655 --> 00:03:42,134
- That should curb
your reckless
118
00:03:42,178 --> 00:03:43,484
- and irresponsible ways.
- Probably not.
119
00:03:43,527 --> 00:03:45,442
- [phone chimes]
- Ahh!
120
00:03:45,486 --> 00:03:47,488
Now as punishment,
she's gonna binge watch
121
00:03:47,531 --> 00:03:49,359
- "Mental Dental" without me.
- Ohh, boy.
122
00:03:49,403 --> 00:03:51,361
- That's that show about the
dentists in the insane asylum.
123
00:03:51,405 --> 00:03:53,276
- Good show.
- Jake G-g-gyllenhaal.
124
00:03:53,320 --> 00:03:55,104
- Oh, Gyllellenhaal is great
in that show.
125
00:03:55,147 --> 00:03:57,802
- He plays the dentist,
Dr. Frederick Mental, DDS.
126
00:03:57,846 --> 00:03:58,934
- Tell you what, thought,
that's not the best
127
00:03:58,977 --> 00:04:00,631
of the dentist shows.
128
00:04:00,675 --> 00:04:02,503
The best show is the one
about the girl in 1904 Poland,
129
00:04:02,546 --> 00:04:03,765
who becomes a boy so she could
be a dentist--
130
00:04:03,808 --> 00:04:05,114
- "Yentl Dentle."
- Ohh.
131
00:04:05,157 --> 00:04:06,333
Ronda Rousey's
excellent in that.
132
00:04:06,376 --> 00:04:07,899
- She's so good.
- She's so good.
133
00:04:07,943 --> 00:04:09,771
- That second number she sings.
- Ah.
134
00:04:09,814 --> 00:04:11,294
- That one's great.
- I watched that one
135
00:04:11,338 --> 00:04:12,991
without Vicky,
she got mad about that too.
136
00:04:13,035 --> 00:04:14,341
- Well, that's married life
for you,
137
00:04:14,384 --> 00:04:16,299
and I miss it
exactly zero much.
138
00:04:16,343 --> 00:04:18,736
- Well, that's twice as much as
I miss being married to you.
139
00:04:18,780 --> 00:04:20,434
- [dramatic music]- Oh, my God, Felicity,
140
00:04:20,477 --> 00:04:21,826
Long time, no see.
141
00:04:21,870 --> 00:04:24,046
- Wow, Felicity,
you look...different.
142
00:04:24,089 --> 00:04:25,352
After we got divorced,
143
00:04:25,395 --> 00:04:27,310
I became an ordained
Wiccan minister.
144
00:04:27,354 --> 00:04:28,920
- So you split with your wife,
and you drove her
145
00:04:28,964 --> 00:04:31,662
- to the dark arts.
- Oh, stick a sock in, Terry.
146
00:04:31,706 --> 00:04:33,142
I can put a hex on you so fast
147
00:04:33,185 --> 00:04:36,363
it'll make your
head spin--literally.
148
00:04:36,406 --> 00:04:38,452
Eddie, Sal Green is dead.
149
00:04:38,495 --> 00:04:39,757
- Sal Green,
our divorce lawyer?
150
00:04:39,801 --> 00:04:41,281
Yes and no.
151
00:04:41,324 --> 00:04:42,673
On his deathbed he confessed
he was never
152
00:04:42,717 --> 00:04:44,153
a licensed attorney.
153
00:04:44,196 --> 00:04:46,198
- He was a fraud.
- So what does that mean?
154
00:04:46,242 --> 00:04:48,462
- It means that every paper
we signed back then
155
00:04:48,505 --> 00:04:50,420
is null and void.
156
00:04:50,464 --> 00:04:52,640
You and I are still married.
157
00:04:52,683 --> 00:04:54,337
- [dramatic music]
- [gasps]
158
00:04:54,381 --> 00:04:56,861
♪
159
00:04:56,905 --> 00:04:58,559
[gulps]
160
00:04:58,602 --> 00:05:03,128
- All right, Lance Armschlong,
time's up, buddy.
161
00:05:03,172 --> 00:05:04,739
- I'll have you know,
Lance Armschlong
162
00:05:04,782 --> 00:05:06,480
is a highly respected
exotic dancer,
163
00:05:06,523 --> 00:05:08,133
and a close personal friend
of mine.
164
00:05:08,177 --> 00:05:09,831
- How was it?
- Incredible.
165
00:05:09,874 --> 00:05:11,354
- Really?
- My trainer was awesome.
166
00:05:11,398 --> 00:05:12,573
- Ohh!
- I mean, seriously.
167
00:05:12,616 --> 00:05:14,488
- Enjoy, my butt sweat.
[laughs]
168
00:05:14,531 --> 00:05:16,620
Eww.
169
00:05:16,664 --> 00:05:18,622
All right, here we go.
170
00:05:18,666 --> 00:05:20,711
Ooh.
171
00:05:20,755 --> 00:05:22,496
Pick a name, and--
172
00:05:24,846 --> 00:05:26,804
Wow, okay.
[laughs]
173
00:05:26,848 --> 00:05:29,677
[mumbling] ..man3.
174
00:05:31,679 --> 00:05:34,029
Really?
175
00:05:34,072 --> 00:05:35,552
...man5.
176
00:05:35,596 --> 00:05:37,728
Are you kidding me?
177
00:05:37,772 --> 00:05:39,077
All right, you know what?
178
00:05:39,121 --> 00:05:41,950
ShoveItUpYourAss.
[beeps]
179
00:05:41,993 --> 00:05:43,604
Aw, man, no!
180
00:05:43,647 --> 00:05:46,346
Hi, and welcome to Pedalton.
181
00:05:46,389 --> 00:05:47,564
I'm Anita Worthy.
182
00:05:47,608 --> 00:05:49,131
Hi, Anita.
183
00:05:49,174 --> 00:05:50,741
- You might be tempted
to speak to me.
184
00:05:50,785 --> 00:05:52,700
But this is
a prerecorded workout,
185
00:05:52,743 --> 00:05:55,790
so I can't hear you
or respond.
186
00:05:55,833 --> 00:05:58,053
- Oh, that's okay.
I'm just gonna stare at you.
187
00:05:58,096 --> 00:06:01,404
- You're incredible.
- Okay, let's start pedaling.
188
00:06:01,448 --> 00:06:03,406
Let's go!
[all hooting]
189
00:06:03,450 --> 00:06:04,929
This is a 10-mile circuit,
190
00:06:04,973 --> 00:06:06,931
so we've got
some time together.
191
00:06:06,975 --> 00:06:08,890
I'm gonna start by telling you
a little bit about myself.
192
00:06:08,933 --> 00:06:10,413
Please do.
193
00:06:10,457 --> 00:06:11,893
- When I was a medic
in the military,
194
00:06:11,936 --> 00:06:13,024
I used to get
through tough days
195
00:06:13,068 --> 00:06:14,417
by singing acapella.
196
00:06:14,461 --> 00:06:15,897
That's me!
197
00:06:15,940 --> 00:06:18,029
And I played the ukulele.
198
00:06:18,073 --> 00:06:21,337
- Girl, you better stop.
I'll come marry you right now.
199
00:06:21,381 --> 00:06:23,078
- So what are you going to do
about it, Eddie?
200
00:06:23,121 --> 00:06:25,863
- I'm gonna find
a living divorce lawyer
201
00:06:25,907 --> 00:06:27,169
and we'll get divorced
for real.
202
00:06:27,212 --> 00:06:29,563
It's not that simple, dummy.
203
00:06:29,606 --> 00:06:30,912
- Hey, Chief,
I was gonna ask you
204
00:06:30,955 --> 00:06:33,088
about the, um--
205
00:06:33,131 --> 00:06:34,568
Aunt Felicity, is that you?
206
00:06:34,611 --> 00:06:36,874
- Lucy?
- Oh, my God.
207
00:06:36,918 --> 00:06:39,137
I mean, you look so different
than the pictures.
208
00:06:39,181 --> 00:06:40,922
You're so mystical.
209
00:06:40,965 --> 00:06:42,576
- Well, I went in a different
direction
210
00:06:42,619 --> 00:06:44,273
after Eddie cheated on me.
211
00:06:44,316 --> 00:06:45,883
- She became a witch.
- Yes.
212
00:06:45,927 --> 00:06:48,364
Primarily so I could
lay curses on Eddie.
213
00:06:48,408 --> 00:06:50,975
- Yeah, right. What curses
have you ever laid on me?
214
00:06:51,019 --> 00:06:53,674
- Did you
pop a nut two years ago?
215
00:06:53,717 --> 00:06:55,240
Maybe.
216
00:06:55,284 --> 00:06:56,807
- I put a photo of you
in the freezer along
217
00:06:56,851 --> 00:06:59,288
with a broken walnut
and a nasty tarot card.
218
00:06:59,331 --> 00:07:00,507
It's called a freezer spell.
219
00:07:00,550 --> 00:07:01,595
That's bullshit.
220
00:07:01,638 --> 00:07:03,553
I popped your nut in '97.
221
00:07:03,597 --> 00:07:05,773
And did you have teeth
pulled this year?
222
00:07:05,816 --> 00:07:07,427
Yes, I took pig's teeth
223
00:07:07,470 --> 00:07:09,864
and put it in a bucket of sugar
for that one.
224
00:07:09,907 --> 00:07:12,344
Has your back gone out lately?
225
00:07:12,388 --> 00:07:13,998
- Yes.
- I made a doll of you
226
00:07:14,042 --> 00:07:15,478
and broke it in half.
227
00:07:15,522 --> 00:07:16,827
Why put all the curses on me?
228
00:07:16,871 --> 00:07:18,263
For giving Eddie an alibi
229
00:07:18,307 --> 00:07:19,264
when he cheated.
230
00:07:19,308 --> 00:07:20,570
I will always hate you.
231
00:07:20,614 --> 00:07:21,919
But he's the one who cheated!
232
00:07:21,963 --> 00:07:23,791
- Ah!
At least now you admit it.
233
00:07:23,834 --> 00:07:25,662
- Ohh, she got me.
- Okay, okay.
234
00:07:25,706 --> 00:07:27,838
Let's just get back
to the situation at hand.
235
00:07:27,882 --> 00:07:29,492
What are we gonna do
about this divorce?
236
00:07:29,536 --> 00:07:31,581
- I want a proper settlement
this time.
237
00:07:31,625 --> 00:07:33,148
I want the house, Eddie.
238
00:07:33,191 --> 00:07:35,759
[dramatic music]
239
00:07:35,803 --> 00:07:37,500
[inhales sharply]
240
00:07:38,632 --> 00:07:41,896
- Anyways, I've always hated
being a leap year baby.
241
00:07:41,939 --> 00:07:43,854
Not very many people
can relate.
242
00:07:43,898 --> 00:07:46,335
If you do, give me a call.
243
00:07:46,378 --> 00:07:48,729
I relate! I relate!
244
00:07:48,772 --> 00:07:50,252
All right!
245
00:07:50,295 --> 00:07:52,994
Great job, everyone.
Let's cool down.
246
00:07:53,037 --> 00:07:55,475
- What do you think?
- Oh, Anita Worthy is
247
00:07:55,518 --> 00:07:56,867
the greatest thing that ever
happened to me.
248
00:07:56,911 --> 00:07:58,521
- Me too.
- She's so supportive
249
00:07:58,565 --> 00:08:00,175
- without being condescending.
- Yeah.
250
00:08:00,218 --> 00:08:01,916
She's just so inspiring
without being annoying.
251
00:08:01,959 --> 00:08:03,918
And we--
both: Have so much in common.
252
00:08:03,961 --> 00:08:05,659
Whoa, whoa, whoa, guys, guys.
253
00:08:05,702 --> 00:08:06,877
Anita is my trainer.
254
00:08:06,921 --> 00:08:07,965
I rode with her first,
255
00:08:08,009 --> 00:08:09,445
so that's my trainer, okay?
256
00:08:09,489 --> 00:08:11,708
- Ike, the workouts
are prerecorded.
257
00:08:11,752 --> 00:08:14,015
- We can all ride with Anita.
- Mm.
258
00:08:15,016 --> 00:08:16,800
- Yeah, I guess, right? I mean,
if they're pre-recorded,
259
00:08:16,844 --> 00:08:19,281
then why would we be
jealous of each other?
260
00:08:19,324 --> 00:08:20,804
- both: Totally.
- Sorry, guys.
261
00:08:20,848 --> 00:08:21,849
[laughs]
[bike chimes]
262
00:08:21,892 --> 00:08:22,893
Okay, gang.
263
00:08:22,937 --> 00:08:24,547
Now, just a reminder,
264
00:08:24,591 --> 00:08:27,028
for the rest of the day
during my live workouts,
265
00:08:27,071 --> 00:08:29,030
Whoever gets
the highest workout score
266
00:08:29,073 --> 00:08:33,034
will win a private cycle
with me tonight at 6:00 pm.
267
00:08:33,077 --> 00:08:36,690
It'll be a one-on-one session
where I'll be able to see you,
268
00:08:36,733 --> 00:08:40,389
hear you, and interact
with you and only you.
269
00:08:41,129 --> 00:08:42,522
Great job, everyone.
270
00:08:42,565 --> 00:08:44,175
♪
271
00:08:44,219 --> 00:08:46,700
- I will murder you
both viciously.
272
00:08:47,744 --> 00:08:50,181
- You owe it to me to give me
that house, Eddie.
273
00:08:50,225 --> 00:08:51,879
Why are you so opposed to it?
274
00:08:51,922 --> 00:08:53,315
It's my house. I paid for it.
275
00:08:53,358 --> 00:08:55,012
Then you cheated on me.
276
00:08:55,056 --> 00:08:57,362
- Only because you became
very distant.
277
00:08:57,406 --> 00:08:59,843
- Because you were obsessed
with Matthew Broderick.
278
00:08:59,887 --> 00:09:01,410
- That's not true.
- It's true.
279
00:09:01,453 --> 00:09:04,369
- You wanted to be him
in sexual roleplay.
280
00:09:04,413 --> 00:09:05,370
- All right, I think
we should go.
281
00:09:05,414 --> 00:09:07,111
No, stay.
282
00:09:07,155 --> 00:09:09,505
Eddie wanted to roleplay in bed
as Matthew Broderick
283
00:09:09,549 --> 00:09:11,986
and not the fun stuff
like "Inspector Gadget."
284
00:09:12,029 --> 00:09:14,118
No, he wanted to be
"Ladyhawke."
285
00:09:14,162 --> 00:09:15,598
- Hey, "Ladyhawke"
is a great movie.
286
00:09:15,642 --> 00:09:16,904
- It is a good movie.
Michelle Pfeiffer.
287
00:09:16,947 --> 00:09:18,383
Shut up, Terry.
288
00:09:18,427 --> 00:09:20,342
- Okay, okay, just give me
a moment
289
00:09:20,385 --> 00:09:21,648
to process all of this.
290
00:09:21,691 --> 00:09:22,779
It's not every day
that your ex-wife
291
00:09:22,823 --> 00:09:24,172
shows up with news like this.
292
00:09:24,215 --> 00:09:26,435
[dramatic music]
293
00:09:26,478 --> 00:09:28,089
Hello, Eddie.
294
00:09:28,132 --> 00:09:29,090
- Make that two ex-wives.
295
00:09:29,133 --> 00:09:31,962
Oh, my God! Aunt Ulsa!
296
00:09:32,006 --> 00:09:33,921
Hi, Lucy.
297
00:09:33,964 --> 00:09:36,097
Sal Green is dead.
298
00:09:36,140 --> 00:09:38,360
He was never a lawyer.
299
00:09:38,403 --> 00:09:40,014
We are still married.
300
00:09:40,057 --> 00:09:42,233
[dramatic music]
301
00:09:42,277 --> 00:09:43,321
When it rains, it pours.
302
00:09:43,365 --> 00:09:44,409
Shut your mouth!
303
00:09:47,021 --> 00:09:48,283
- Okay, gang, we're riding
to the top
304
00:09:48,326 --> 00:09:49,980
of Gut Check Hill,
who's with me?
305
00:09:50,024 --> 00:09:51,242
- [all hooting]- Whoo, baby.
306
00:09:51,286 --> 00:09:52,896
- I am, Anita.
- Right on!
307
00:09:52,940 --> 00:09:55,638
Remember, I can't hear you
guys. [laughs]
308
00:09:55,682 --> 00:09:58,380
- Why does she ask us questions
if she can't hear our answers?
309
00:10:01,426 --> 00:10:04,647
Good start, Flyfisher21.
310
00:10:04,691 --> 00:10:07,128
You got this, GnarlyCat007.
311
00:10:09,086 --> 00:10:11,480
[app chiming]
312
00:10:11,523 --> 00:10:13,482
[grunts]
313
00:10:13,525 --> 00:10:15,658
Gut Check Hill is right.
Come on!
314
00:10:15,702 --> 00:10:19,401
- Oh, don't slow down on me,
IkeOnABike.
315
00:10:19,444 --> 00:10:21,751
I know you can do this.
Let's go!
316
00:10:21,795 --> 00:10:22,752
- IkeOnABike,
she said my name.
317
00:10:22,796 --> 00:10:24,014
She said my name!
318
00:10:24,058 --> 00:10:26,277
Oh, my God.
[app chimes]
319
00:10:26,321 --> 00:10:29,193
What kind of hill is this,
Anita?
320
00:10:29,237 --> 00:10:31,108
Climbing up a wall.
321
00:10:31,152 --> 00:10:32,849
- Who's pumped?
[all cheer]
322
00:10:32,893 --> 00:10:35,330
- Yes!- [grunts]
323
00:10:35,373 --> 00:10:39,464
Damn, this is hard!
324
00:10:39,508 --> 00:10:41,858
Shit!
325
00:10:41,902 --> 00:10:44,861
- So, Eddie,
what are we going to do?
326
00:10:44,905 --> 00:10:46,733
- Get divorced?
- You don't have to.
327
00:10:46,776 --> 00:10:48,691
We're still married.
328
00:10:48,735 --> 00:10:50,127
Your marriage never happened.
329
00:10:50,171 --> 00:10:51,476
- She makes a good point.
- She's right.
330
00:10:51,520 --> 00:10:53,043
Ulsa needed a green card.
331
00:10:53,087 --> 00:10:54,915
So my mom set her up
with Eddie as a prank.
332
00:10:54,958 --> 00:10:57,961
- The Penisi's prank so hard.
- Yes, they do.
333
00:10:58,005 --> 00:10:59,441
So Eddie married Ulsa.
334
00:10:59,484 --> 00:11:01,225
After two years,
she got her green card.
335
00:11:01,269 --> 00:11:03,706
One week later, she
divorced him and fleeced him.
336
00:11:03,750 --> 00:11:06,013
Oof, that's pure evil.
337
00:11:06,056 --> 00:11:07,492
Wait, there's more.
338
00:11:07,536 --> 00:11:09,103
He cheated on me.
339
00:11:09,146 --> 00:11:12,584
- Oh, you ki--
He cheated on me, too.
340
00:11:12,628 --> 00:11:14,891
Ohh, now it makes sense.
341
00:11:14,935 --> 00:11:16,414
Okay, hold on a second.
342
00:11:16,458 --> 00:11:18,634
I paid both of you
ladies alimony for years.
343
00:11:18,678 --> 00:11:21,158
Now if our divorce
wasn't valid, and you and I
344
00:11:21,202 --> 00:11:23,900
were never legally married,
then I demand restitution.
345
00:11:23,944 --> 00:11:24,945
He's right.
346
00:11:24,988 --> 00:11:26,686
both: Shut up, Terry!
347
00:11:26,729 --> 00:11:29,906
- Okay.
- I am not paying you anything,
348
00:11:29,950 --> 00:11:31,647
Edward Caesar Penisi.
349
00:11:31,691 --> 00:11:34,694
This is what you are
going to do for me.
350
00:11:34,737 --> 00:11:36,652
If our marriage is null
and void
351
00:11:36,696 --> 00:11:39,916
that means my citizenship
is null and void.
352
00:11:39,960 --> 00:11:41,309
I want you to marry me.
353
00:11:41,352 --> 00:11:44,616
[laughs]
354
00:11:44,660 --> 00:11:46,967
No, freakin' way.
355
00:11:47,010 --> 00:11:51,928
- Well, if you don't, I will
have you charged with bigamy!
356
00:11:51,972 --> 00:11:54,017
[dramatic music]
357
00:11:54,061 --> 00:11:56,106
Why are you spit taking?
358
00:11:56,150 --> 00:11:57,107
She said bigamy.
359
00:11:57,151 --> 00:11:59,066
[dramatic music]
360
00:11:59,109 --> 00:12:01,198
- I thought she said big Amy.
- Who's big Amy?
361
00:12:01,242 --> 00:12:03,505
- I don't know that's why
I didn't spit take.
362
00:12:03,548 --> 00:12:04,811
Andy, clean this up!
363
00:12:04,854 --> 00:12:06,464
- You want me to
clean up your spit?
364
00:12:06,508 --> 00:12:08,771
[shoes clacking]
365
00:12:08,815 --> 00:12:10,468
[chuckles]
366
00:12:12,601 --> 00:12:13,863
[laughs]
367
00:12:13,907 --> 00:12:15,256
Where did you get
the lameo clothes?
368
00:12:15,299 --> 00:12:16,779
Amazon Drone, bitch.
369
00:12:16,823 --> 00:12:18,563
It's gonna help me
with my speed.
370
00:12:18,607 --> 00:12:22,480
- Yeah, I like the helmet.
Don't fall off. [laughs]
371
00:12:22,524 --> 00:12:24,439
You know what else I got?
372
00:12:24,482 --> 00:12:30,140
State-of-the-art shoes with
click-in capabilities. [laughs]
373
00:12:30,184 --> 00:12:31,402
Here we go.
374
00:12:31,446 --> 00:12:38,496
♪
375
00:12:40,542 --> 00:12:45,852
Paid 200 bucks for these, man.
376
00:12:45,895 --> 00:12:48,376
[pained groaning]
377
00:12:48,419 --> 00:12:49,464
Ahh!
378
00:12:50,465 --> 00:12:52,554
[screams]
379
00:12:52,597 --> 00:12:54,251
[grunting]
380
00:12:54,295 --> 00:12:56,340
Ahh!
381
00:12:57,864 --> 00:13:00,649
Ah! Cramp!
Bad cramp!
382
00:13:00,692 --> 00:13:02,390
[screams]
383
00:13:02,433 --> 00:13:03,913
[clicking]
384
00:13:03,957 --> 00:13:07,830
[laughs]
I did it. I did it.
385
00:13:07,874 --> 00:13:09,136
There we go. Ha.
386
00:13:09,179 --> 00:13:11,138
♪
387
00:13:11,181 --> 00:13:12,356
Ohh, my water.
388
00:13:15,751 --> 00:13:18,014
[screams]
389
00:13:18,058 --> 00:13:21,061
- - RCW9864
- O10--
390
00:13:21,104 --> 00:13:23,324
"A person is guilty of bigamy
391
00:13:23,367 --> 00:13:26,457
"if he or she intentionally
marries another person
392
00:13:26,501 --> 00:13:29,678
"when either person
has a living spouse.
393
00:13:29,721 --> 00:13:32,463
"Punishable by five years
in jail.
394
00:13:32,507 --> 00:13:34,465
A Class C felony."
395
00:13:34,509 --> 00:13:35,989
- Doesn't sound like
a classy felony.
396
00:13:36,032 --> 00:13:37,120
[laughs]
397
00:13:37,164 --> 00:13:38,992
Eddie, you're a bigamist
398
00:13:39,035 --> 00:13:41,864
and I will report you
if you don't comply.
399
00:13:41,908 --> 00:13:47,174
But I will look the other way
if you marry me.
400
00:13:47,217 --> 00:13:50,220
- Still no.
- [speaking Swedish]
401
00:13:55,530 --> 00:13:58,576
[speaking Swedish]
402
00:14:06,410 --> 00:14:08,282
- When did Cap learn
to speak Chinese?
403
00:14:08,325 --> 00:14:09,718
It's Swedish, Ike.
404
00:14:09,761 --> 00:14:11,067
- No, I know.
That's what I said.
405
00:14:11,111 --> 00:14:13,113
Like, when did you learn
to speak Swedish?
406
00:14:13,156 --> 00:14:14,114
She taught him.
407
00:14:14,157 --> 00:14:17,204
[both speaking Swedish]
408
00:14:22,644 --> 00:14:25,516
- [sighs]
[speaking Swedish] Oof.
409
00:14:25,560 --> 00:14:27,170
Ah, tingle button.
410
00:14:27,214 --> 00:14:28,693
It just means the same.
411
00:14:28,737 --> 00:14:29,999
Like, tingle button, I guess.
412
00:14:30,043 --> 00:14:31,827
- Yeah, she taught him that,
too.
413
00:14:31,871 --> 00:14:34,917
- Chief, why is there a picture
of you in the freezer?
414
00:14:34,961 --> 00:14:37,659
And why is it attached
to a pig's foot?
415
00:14:37,702 --> 00:14:39,313
- That's why my feet
are so cold.
416
00:14:39,356 --> 00:14:40,792
Stop it with
the freezer spells.
417
00:14:40,836 --> 00:14:41,837
Never!
418
00:14:41,881 --> 00:14:44,057
[evil music]
419
00:14:44,100 --> 00:14:46,276
[choking]
420
00:14:48,713 --> 00:14:50,585
- Was that real?
- I don't know.
421
00:14:50,628 --> 00:14:53,718
♪
422
00:14:53,762 --> 00:14:57,722
Hoo. Hello, hello.
423
00:14:57,766 --> 00:14:59,550
Who stole the seat?
424
00:14:59,594 --> 00:15:02,814
I don't need a seat.
425
00:15:02,858 --> 00:15:05,078
Here we go.
[laughs]
426
00:15:06,601 --> 00:15:08,559
They took the pedals?
427
00:15:08,603 --> 00:15:10,605
[grunting]
428
00:15:12,389 --> 00:15:14,957
[struggling efforts]
I don't--
429
00:15:15,001 --> 00:15:16,437
Buh-bye.
430
00:15:19,919 --> 00:15:21,442
I guess I'll ride later.
431
00:15:21,485 --> 00:15:23,487
- Why are they being so mean
to your dad?
432
00:15:23,531 --> 00:15:25,794
- Because Uncle Eddie
made Chief lie for him.
433
00:15:25,837 --> 00:15:27,578
When his wives thought
he was cheating,
434
00:15:27,622 --> 00:15:30,494
he told Felicity that he
and Eddie were at hot yoga
435
00:15:30,538 --> 00:15:32,322
and that Eddie passed out
from dehydration.
436
00:15:32,366 --> 00:15:35,456
And then he told Ulsa that he
and Eddie were skydiving,
437
00:15:35,499 --> 00:15:37,458
and that Eddie passed out
for mental exhaustion.
438
00:15:37,501 --> 00:15:39,329
Wait, wait, wait.
439
00:15:39,373 --> 00:15:42,202
Chief is into yoga
and skydiving?
440
00:15:42,245 --> 00:15:43,551
[laughs]
[imitates explosion]
441
00:15:43,594 --> 00:15:45,031
That's amazing.
442
00:15:45,074 --> 00:15:46,815
- By the way, Terry,
your best man speech
443
00:15:46,858 --> 00:15:48,208
was an embarrassment.
444
00:15:48,251 --> 00:15:50,297
That Penisi joke.
[scoffs] So stupid.
445
00:15:50,340 --> 00:15:52,647
- He told that dumb joke
at your wedding too?
446
00:15:52,690 --> 00:15:54,127
Oh, yes.
447
00:15:54,170 --> 00:15:55,606
- It's a great joke.
- I like that joke.
448
00:15:55,650 --> 00:15:57,260
- What are you talking about?
- Yeah.
449
00:15:57,304 --> 00:15:58,914
- That joke killed.
- Yeah, it was a good joke.
450
00:15:58,958 --> 00:16:00,872
- Chief was the best man
at both of their weddings?
451
00:16:00,916 --> 00:16:03,745
- Yeah. By the third wedding,
he really had things dialed in.
452
00:16:03,788 --> 00:16:05,660
There's a third wedding?
453
00:16:05,703 --> 00:16:08,619
- Eddie...
[dramatic music]
454
00:16:08,663 --> 00:16:10,230
we need to talk.
455
00:16:10,273 --> 00:16:12,710
- [sighs]
I should have expected this.
456
00:16:12,754 --> 00:16:14,886
Everybody, this
is my third wife Cece.
457
00:16:14,930 --> 00:16:16,976
- Hi, Aunt Cece!
- Hey, Lucy.
458
00:16:17,019 --> 00:16:18,586
- Have a seat. We are
just figuring out
459
00:16:18,629 --> 00:16:20,675
- the Sal Green of it all.
- Good.
460
00:16:20,718 --> 00:16:22,416
Because I just found out
461
00:16:22,459 --> 00:16:26,289
the city is buying your house
for a million dollars.
462
00:16:26,333 --> 00:16:28,335
You lying bastard.
463
00:16:28,378 --> 00:16:31,338
[dramatic music]
464
00:16:31,381 --> 00:16:33,601
♪
465
00:16:33,644 --> 00:16:34,950
[gulps]
466
00:16:36,778 --> 00:16:38,127
♪
467
00:16:38,171 --> 00:16:39,868
Cece, how did you know that
468
00:16:39,911 --> 00:16:41,739
I was getting a million dollars
from my house?
469
00:16:41,783 --> 00:16:43,350
- My family is connected,
Eddie.
470
00:16:43,393 --> 00:16:44,612
We know everything.
471
00:16:44,655 --> 00:16:45,961
You might recognize Aunt Cece
472
00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:48,050
by her maiden name--
Bulkshop.
473
00:16:48,094 --> 00:16:50,792
- As in Bulkshop
Wholesale Store?
474
00:16:50,835 --> 00:16:52,272
- Mm-hmm.
- Ooh, she got money.
475
00:16:52,315 --> 00:16:54,274
- That's why Cap
doesn't like Bulkshop.
476
00:16:54,317 --> 00:16:56,145
- Her dad tried to get him
to change his name
477
00:16:56,189 --> 00:16:57,712
to Eddie Bulkshop.
478
00:16:57,755 --> 00:16:59,279
But in the end,
she took his last name.
479
00:16:59,322 --> 00:17:01,933
- Oh, Cece Penisi.
[both laugh]
480
00:17:01,977 --> 00:17:03,848
That's--that's pretty dope,
actually.
481
00:17:03,892 --> 00:17:06,286
- By then, Dad's best man
toast was off the chain.
482
00:17:06,329 --> 00:17:08,070
He had it down to a tight 10.
483
00:17:08,114 --> 00:17:10,159
- Did Terry give the best
man speech for you too?
484
00:17:10,203 --> 00:17:11,291
both: Yes.
485
00:17:11,334 --> 00:17:12,509
Did he do that stupid joke?
486
00:17:12,553 --> 00:17:13,902
both: Yes.
487
00:17:13,945 --> 00:17:15,947
- "Congratulations.
Maybe one day--"
488
00:17:15,991 --> 00:17:19,081
all: "Eddie will put
a little Penisi in you."
489
00:17:19,125 --> 00:17:21,127
- [both laugh]
- I don't sound like that.
490
00:17:21,170 --> 00:17:22,867
Shut up, Terry.
491
00:17:22,911 --> 00:17:24,478
Wait, Luce, what time is it?
492
00:17:24,521 --> 00:17:26,001
It's almost five.
493
00:17:26,045 --> 00:17:27,829
- Ooh, Anita Worthy is about
to announce
494
00:17:27,872 --> 00:17:29,352
who won
the one-on-one cycle contest.
495
00:17:29,396 --> 00:17:30,527
Oh!
496
00:17:30,571 --> 00:17:33,617
[shoes clacking loudly]
497
00:17:35,228 --> 00:17:37,795
- So, Eddie, since you and I
were never married,
498
00:17:37,839 --> 00:17:40,755
just write me a check for the
$1 million of alimony
499
00:17:40,798 --> 00:17:43,540
I have paid you
over the past 15 years.
500
00:17:43,584 --> 00:17:45,499
Or just give me the house.
501
00:17:45,542 --> 00:17:46,978
That house is mine, sister.
502
00:17:47,022 --> 00:17:48,371
Watch yourself, Stevie Nix.
503
00:17:48,415 --> 00:17:49,981
- Watch yourself,
Shamrock Shake.
504
00:17:50,025 --> 00:17:51,070
Catfight.
505
00:17:51,113 --> 00:17:52,158
both: Shut up!
506
00:17:52,201 --> 00:17:55,291
♪
507
00:17:55,335 --> 00:17:58,077
[clacking]
508
00:17:58,120 --> 00:18:00,253
- Dude, you got an outfit
and a ring light?
509
00:18:00,296 --> 00:18:01,993
- Hell yeah.
I've gotta look sweet
510
00:18:02,037 --> 00:18:04,474
when I get my one-on-one ride
with Anita Worthy.
511
00:18:04,518 --> 00:18:05,606
Oh, man.
512
00:18:05,649 --> 00:18:07,260
Except I'm gonna be the one
513
00:18:07,303 --> 00:18:10,567
who does the one-on-one ride
with Anita, sucker.
514
00:18:10,611 --> 00:18:12,569
- Hey, Tex, are you spraying
cologne right now?
515
00:18:12,613 --> 00:18:14,484
- Yeah, jealous much?
[laughs]
516
00:18:14,528 --> 00:18:16,182
You guys
didn't think of that, did you?
517
00:18:16,225 --> 00:18:18,184
- You know she can't smell you
through the screen.
518
00:18:18,227 --> 00:18:19,576
[both laugh]
519
00:18:19,620 --> 00:18:21,404
[laughs]
520
00:18:21,448 --> 00:18:22,666
Yeah, I know.
521
00:18:22,710 --> 00:18:24,233
It's fo--it's for
atmosphere, guys.
522
00:18:24,277 --> 00:18:25,756
- Okay, well, both of you guys
just shut up
523
00:18:25,800 --> 00:18:27,671
because my girlfriend's
about to talk.
524
00:18:27,715 --> 00:18:30,326
- Okay everyone,
drumroll, please.
525
00:18:30,370 --> 00:18:32,894
- "Drumroll please."
Anita you're so funny.
526
00:18:32,937 --> 00:18:34,461
- She can't hear you, Ike.
- I know.
527
00:18:34,504 --> 00:18:35,984
Honestly, I keep forgetting.
528
00:18:36,027 --> 00:18:37,551
- There can only be
one winner.
529
00:18:37,594 --> 00:18:39,248
So without further ado,
530
00:18:39,292 --> 00:18:41,163
the winner of the one-on-one
531
00:18:41,207 --> 00:18:43,470
personal cycle is...
532
00:18:43,513 --> 00:18:44,993
- Whatever happens, guys,
I love both of you.
533
00:18:45,036 --> 00:18:46,168
Aw, thank you.
534
00:18:46,212 --> 00:18:48,736
TacomaFDStation24.
535
00:18:48,779 --> 00:18:49,867
[cheering]
536
00:18:49,911 --> 00:18:53,697
- Okay!
[laughter]
537
00:18:53,741 --> 00:18:56,613
- That's weird because
I sabotaged both of you guys.
538
00:18:56,657 --> 00:18:57,875
- I know.
I did it to you guys, too.
539
00:18:57,919 --> 00:18:59,486
And I, you.
540
00:18:59,529 --> 00:19:01,401
- They must have thought
that the TacomaFDStation24
541
00:19:01,444 --> 00:19:03,054
account was one person
542
00:19:03,098 --> 00:19:04,882
and then they added
all of our rides together.
543
00:19:04,926 --> 00:19:06,928
- Oh yeah, that's why
it's so awesome.
544
00:19:06,971 --> 00:19:09,844
- Congrats,
TacomaFDStation24.
545
00:19:09,887 --> 00:19:12,281
- You rode for three hours.- Ooh!
546
00:19:12,325 --> 00:19:14,327
- See you soon
for our one-on-one.
547
00:19:14,370 --> 00:19:15,676
How are we gonna decide
548
00:19:15,719 --> 00:19:17,852
who gets
the private ride with Anita?
549
00:19:19,419 --> 00:19:21,072
- Oh, rock, paper, scissors.
- Nice.
550
00:19:21,116 --> 00:19:24,772
- Is that--
- No, I'm gonna punch you.
551
00:19:24,815 --> 00:19:26,513
Paper.
552
00:19:26,556 --> 00:19:29,646
- Okay, I was only ever
legally married to Felicity
553
00:19:29,690 --> 00:19:31,909
but there's potential bigamy
on the table
554
00:19:31,953 --> 00:19:34,129
and some common law
marriage statutes
555
00:19:34,173 --> 00:19:37,437
which have yet to be determined
that may be complicated
556
00:19:37,480 --> 00:19:41,092
by three cases
of marital infidelity.
557
00:19:41,136 --> 00:19:42,572
Quit stalling, Eddie,
558
00:19:42,616 --> 00:19:43,704
you owe me
a million dollars of alimony.
559
00:19:43,747 --> 00:19:45,140
And I want the house.
560
00:19:45,184 --> 00:19:46,707
- I only want your hand
in marriage.
561
00:19:46,750 --> 00:19:48,317
I don't have a million bucks.
562
00:19:48,361 --> 00:19:50,754
- Yes, you do, your house.
- I used the alimony
563
00:19:50,798 --> 00:19:52,887
you paid me to pay
the alimony to these two.
564
00:19:52,930 --> 00:19:54,280
So if you make me pay you back
565
00:19:54,323 --> 00:19:56,369
then I'm making them
pay me back.
566
00:19:56,412 --> 00:19:58,153
Not my problem, Eddie.
567
00:19:58,197 --> 00:20:01,330
My lawyers are already drawing
up a lawsuit as we speak.
568
00:20:01,374 --> 00:20:03,811
It's the end of the line
for you, buddy.
569
00:20:03,854 --> 00:20:04,942
Goo.
570
00:20:04,986 --> 00:20:07,641
Oh, no, it's not.
571
00:20:07,684 --> 00:20:09,208
[dramatic sting]
572
00:20:09,251 --> 00:20:11,210
I called my friend
at the Hall of Records.
573
00:20:11,253 --> 00:20:13,951
Interestingly, there are
no marriage licenses filed
574
00:20:13,995 --> 00:20:16,171
for any of your marriages.
575
00:20:16,215 --> 00:20:18,782
Now, as you ladies may recall,
576
00:20:18,826 --> 00:20:21,611
not only was I the best man
at all of your weddings,
577
00:20:21,655 --> 00:20:23,874
but I was also
the justice of the peace.
578
00:20:23,918 --> 00:20:26,921
So I officiated over
all of your weddings.
579
00:20:26,964 --> 00:20:28,357
I forgot that.
580
00:20:28,401 --> 00:20:30,359
- And as the officiant,
it was my duty
581
00:20:30,403 --> 00:20:32,883
to file the marriage licenses
with the county.
582
00:20:32,927 --> 00:20:35,364
Unfortunately, I had
a few too many cocktails
583
00:20:35,408 --> 00:20:38,976
at my dear friend's
various wedding ceremonies,
584
00:20:39,020 --> 00:20:40,500
and I failed to do so.
585
00:20:40,543 --> 00:20:43,024
However, I checked
my file cabinet,
586
00:20:43,067 --> 00:20:45,853
and I found these
unfiled documents
587
00:20:45,896 --> 00:20:48,203
in a file marked
"things to do."
588
00:20:48,247 --> 00:20:49,639
Okay, wait a second.
589
00:20:49,683 --> 00:20:52,294
So even my first marriage
was unofficial?
590
00:20:52,338 --> 00:20:54,078
Yes. And I'm sorry.
591
00:20:54,122 --> 00:20:55,906
No, no, no, no, not at all.
592
00:20:55,950 --> 00:20:59,083
I mean, I suppose I should
thank you for your negligence.
593
00:20:59,127 --> 00:21:01,303
- Shut up, Terry.
And what does that mean?
594
00:21:01,347 --> 00:21:03,958
- It means that Eddie
was never married.
595
00:21:04,001 --> 00:21:06,613
And he is as much of a victim
as any of you.
596
00:21:06,656 --> 00:21:08,702
- Yes!
- Ugh!
597
00:21:08,745 --> 00:21:09,964
This is incredible.
598
00:21:10,007 --> 00:21:11,531
- I'm still taking him
to court.
599
00:21:11,574 --> 00:21:13,315
- Then I'm taking these
two ladies to court.
600
00:21:13,359 --> 00:21:14,577
I will be deported.
601
00:21:14,621 --> 00:21:16,666
And I'll be broke. Okay.
602
00:21:16,710 --> 00:21:19,843
That's it.
I'm casting spell on you.
603
00:21:19,887 --> 00:21:21,367
[laughs] Sweet.
604
00:21:24,065 --> 00:21:27,111
[moaning]
605
00:21:27,155 --> 00:21:28,374
Okay, okay, okay.
606
00:21:28,417 --> 00:21:30,724
Just--let's just--
607
00:21:30,767 --> 00:21:33,509
This is all getting
very complicated, and I'm rich.
608
00:21:33,553 --> 00:21:37,121
So let's just split the sale
of the house four ways
609
00:21:37,165 --> 00:21:38,732
and call it a day.
610
00:21:38,775 --> 00:21:40,124
250,000 each, mmm?
611
00:21:40,168 --> 00:21:41,430
Boom.
612
00:21:41,474 --> 00:21:43,432
- But I bought the house
for 250,000.
613
00:21:43,476 --> 00:21:45,129
- Great. Well, then
you'll come out even.
614
00:21:45,173 --> 00:21:47,175
- Wait, who is going to
marry me
615
00:21:47,218 --> 00:21:50,918
- so I can keep my green card?
- I'll do it. You're hot.
616
00:21:50,961 --> 00:21:52,702
But I'm going to need a prenup.
617
00:21:52,746 --> 00:21:54,748
- You got it.
- Too bad Sal Green died.
618
00:21:54,791 --> 00:21:57,185
He gave Eddie a punch card
so his fifth divorce is free.
619
00:21:57,228 --> 00:21:58,578
- Oh, yeah.
- Fifth.
620
00:21:58,621 --> 00:22:01,015
He's only been
divorced three times.
621
00:22:01,058 --> 00:22:03,583
- Eddie, did you hear
about Sal Green?
622
00:22:03,626 --> 00:22:05,498
all: Yeah. We know.
He's dead.
623
00:22:05,541 --> 00:22:07,282
- Hi, Aunt Olive.
- Hi, Lucy.
624
00:22:07,326 --> 00:22:10,285
- Don't waste your time,
sweetheart. You get nothing.
625
00:22:10,329 --> 00:22:12,243
Okay. This was fun.
626
00:22:12,287 --> 00:22:14,637
- Great to see you, Cece.
- Good to see you, Eddie
627
00:22:14,681 --> 00:22:16,422
- and you.
- Oh, yeah.
628
00:22:16,465 --> 00:22:18,293
- Great to see you, Felicity.
- [speaks Swedish]
629
00:22:18,337 --> 00:22:20,643
- Bye.
- Bye, Felicity.
630
00:22:22,210 --> 00:22:25,953
- Mm. [laughs]
Look at this!
631
00:22:25,996 --> 00:22:27,476
She left 20 bucks
on the chair.
632
00:22:31,306 --> 00:22:32,873
Bye, Olive.
633
00:22:32,916 --> 00:22:35,354
- Heh. I actually think
that was my 20 bucks.
634
00:22:35,397 --> 00:22:36,833
Ah, well, now it's hers.
635
00:22:36,877 --> 00:22:39,314
- Guys, just give up.
I'm gonna win.
636
00:22:39,358 --> 00:22:41,011
both: No way!
637
00:22:41,055 --> 00:22:42,926
Ah, ah!
638
00:22:42,970 --> 00:22:46,234
- Listen, class starts
in 15 minutes, okay?
639
00:22:46,277 --> 00:22:48,410
We're all gonna be exhausted.
We gotta figure something out.
640
00:22:48,454 --> 00:22:50,760
- [buzzer]
- Station 24, drunk man
641
00:22:50,804 --> 00:22:52,327
stuck in the shopping cart
642
00:22:52,371 --> 00:22:53,676
- in the Tacomart parking lot.- [groans]
643
00:22:53,720 --> 00:22:55,809
28 Oak Street.
644
00:22:55,852 --> 00:22:58,202
Guys, let's go!
645
00:22:58,246 --> 00:22:59,639
- Okay.
- Come on, we do it fast,
646
00:22:59,682 --> 00:23:00,814
we'll be back
before the hour's up.
647
00:23:00,857 --> 00:23:02,598
Bingo. Bango. Bongo.
648
00:23:02,642 --> 00:23:05,079
[shoes clacking]
649
00:23:05,122 --> 00:23:06,210
Ohh!
650
00:23:08,256 --> 00:23:15,306
♪
651
00:23:17,570 --> 00:23:19,485
TacomaFDStation24?
652
00:23:19,528 --> 00:23:21,574
- Uh, yeah.
- I'm Anita Worthy.
653
00:23:21,617 --> 00:23:24,054
- You won the contest.- Uh--
654
00:23:24,098 --> 00:23:26,100
- You didn't know?- [laughs] No.
655
00:23:26,143 --> 00:23:28,319
But I was probably out
rescuing somebody.
656
00:23:28,363 --> 00:23:30,409
- [laughs]
I like your mustache.
657
00:23:30,452 --> 00:23:32,236
- [laughs]
What a coincidence.
658
00:23:32,280 --> 00:23:34,064
- It likes you too.
- [laughs]
659
00:23:34,108 --> 00:23:37,938
Oh, my God.
What is your name?
660
00:23:37,981 --> 00:23:39,418
I'm Eddie Penisi.
661
00:23:39,461 --> 00:23:42,290
Mm. Anita Worthy Penisi.
662
00:23:42,333 --> 00:23:43,596
Has a nice ring to it.
663
00:23:43,639 --> 00:23:45,728
- So we're getting
married then?
664
00:23:45,772 --> 00:23:47,426
I guess so.
665
00:23:47,469 --> 00:23:50,559
- I don't suppose you live
near Washington, do you?
666
00:23:50,603 --> 00:23:53,997
- Does Seattle count?- [laughs] Really? Okay.
667
00:23:54,041 --> 00:23:56,435
- Hey, I am not going
through this again.
668
00:23:56,478 --> 00:23:58,001
- What?
- Number five.
669
00:23:58,045 --> 00:23:59,350
- Now technically,
it's the first.
670
00:23:59,394 --> 00:24:01,091
- [grunts]
- Oh, come on, Terry.
671
00:24:01,135 --> 00:24:02,310
No more!
672
00:24:02,353 --> 00:24:03,703
You get to do the joke again.
673
00:24:03,753 --> 00:24:08,303
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