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1
00:00:01,784 --> 00:00:03,834
Good morning.Morning.
2
00:00:04,004 --> 00:00:08,054
Mona, kindly explain the
meaning of that e-mail you sent out.
3
00:00:08,225 --> 00:00:09,525
Well, it's very simple.
4
00:00:09,705 --> 00:00:11,265
If you want great
riches to come to you,
5
00:00:11,359 --> 00:00:12,639
you'll send it out to 50
of your closest friends.
6
00:00:12,664 --> 00:00:14,674
Not that e-mail.
7
00:00:15,885 --> 00:00:18,795
The one about not wanting to
celebrate your birthday tomorrow.
8
00:00:18,975 --> 00:00:21,015
How come I haven't
heard anything about this?
9
00:00:21,195 --> 00:00:23,475
Well, I sent it to you, too, ma.
Don't you read your e-mails?
10
00:00:23,501 --> 00:00:26,901
Not since my patient with the multiple
personalities got ahold of my address
11
00:00:28,332 --> 00:00:31,472
and Marilyn, the sneaky one,
keeps bitchin' to me about the others.
12
00:00:32,858 --> 00:00:35,688
Mona, what do you have
against your birthday?
13
00:00:35,861 --> 00:00:39,171
Gee, maybe the fact that every
time I celebrate it, it's a disaster.
14
00:00:39,343 --> 00:00:41,353
Oh, please. Stop exaggerating.
15
00:00:41,519 --> 00:00:44,779
Ah! Age 6... birthday
cake falls in my crotch.
16
00:00:44,957 --> 00:00:47,567
Age 8... mistaken
for a boy by the clown.
17
00:00:47,743 --> 00:00:51,363
Age 14... egg salad
sandwiches, 96-degree heat.
18
00:00:51,529 --> 00:00:53,179
Age 25... see age 6.
19
00:00:55,664 --> 00:00:57,414
You make a compelling argument,
20
00:00:57,579 --> 00:00:59,799
but that doesn't mean that
this year can't be different.
21
00:00:59,972 --> 00:01:01,712
That's right. This
year will be different
22
00:01:01,887 --> 00:01:04,127
because I'm celebrating my
birthday exactly how I want to:
23
00:01:04,281 --> 00:01:06,981
Alone in quiet reflection.
24
00:01:07,154 --> 00:01:09,724
Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!
25
00:01:09,895 --> 00:01:11,975
I'm not kidding.
26
00:01:12,159 --> 00:01:16,079
What I really want is no gifts,
no party, no nothing. Agreed?
27
00:01:16,685 --> 00:01:18,075
Agreed.agreed.
28
00:01:18,252 --> 00:01:19,652
Good. Tomorrow's
already lookin' up.
29
00:01:19,775 --> 00:01:21,425
Let's go.
30
00:01:21,603 --> 00:01:24,043
But, listen, Mona, if it
makes you feel any better,
31
00:01:24,214 --> 00:01:26,174
that clown thought
I was a boy, too.
32
00:01:26,347 --> 00:01:28,647
Really? Oh...
33
00:01:29,263 --> 00:01:30,263
[Mouthing "no"]
34
00:01:33,702 --> 00:01:38,712
♪ through this
journey of discovery ♪
35
00:01:38,881 --> 00:01:43,101
♪ you're finding
you I'm finding me ♪
36
00:01:43,277 --> 00:01:46,057
♪ now that I have
someone special ♪
37
00:01:46,236 --> 00:01:47,976
♪ who brings out the joy ♪
38
00:01:48,151 --> 00:01:49,241
♪ brings out the joy ♪
39
00:01:49,413 --> 00:01:52,553
♪ inside of me ♪
40
00:01:52,721 --> 00:01:54,681
♪ we can become
whatever we want ♪
41
00:01:54,853 --> 00:01:57,033
♪ all we need is lovin', yeah ♪
42
00:01:57,204 --> 00:02:00,564
♪ that's the way I
feel it should be ♪
43
00:02:00,729 --> 00:02:02,249
♪ you and me ♪
44
00:02:02,426 --> 00:02:05,646
[Off-key] ♪ me ♪
45
00:02:12,567 --> 00:02:14,607
Thanks for the ride.
46
00:02:14,786 --> 00:02:16,626
The garage swears they will
be done with my car by Friday.
47
00:02:16,658 --> 00:02:18,788
Have they figured out
what the problem is?
48
00:02:18,964 --> 00:02:22,054
Oh, yes. The mechanic narrowed it
down to the car being a piece of crap.
49
00:02:23,230 --> 00:02:25,750
So I know it's out of your
way, so I appreciate it.
50
00:02:25,928 --> 00:02:27,798
Hey, what's an extra 25 minutes
51
00:02:27,973 --> 00:02:30,063
when I can help out
my sister? Mmm...
52
00:02:30,237 --> 00:02:32,367
Aw, that's sweet.
53
00:02:32,543 --> 00:02:34,553
Loss the coin toss
to Phyllis again?
54
00:02:34,719 --> 00:02:36,549
Third time this week.
55
00:02:37,940 --> 00:02:40,460
Hey, did you get
your gift for Mona yet?
56
00:02:40,638 --> 00:02:41,988
Sure did.
57
00:02:42,162 --> 00:02:44,292
Big box of nothin',
just like she asked.
58
00:02:45,208 --> 00:02:47,598
Adam, did you get Mona
anything for her birthday?
59
00:02:47,776 --> 00:02:49,426
I give her a gift every day.
60
00:02:49,604 --> 00:02:52,004
I refrain from telling her
what I think of her wardrobe.
61
00:02:53,129 --> 00:02:55,129
Believe me, it's
killing me softly.
62
00:02:55,305 --> 00:02:58,695
Guys, I know Mona said no gifts,
63
00:02:58,874 --> 00:03:00,834
but if there's one thing
I know about Mona,
64
00:03:01,006 --> 00:03:03,096
it's that she doesn't know
what she's talkin' about.
65
00:03:03,270 --> 00:03:05,010
So tomorrow we are
all going shopping.
66
00:03:05,185 --> 00:03:06,485
I know the perfect store.
67
00:03:06,664 --> 00:03:08,674
She was pretty
clear in that e-mail.
68
00:03:08,840 --> 00:03:10,490
And you believe
every e-mail you get?
69
00:03:10,668 --> 00:03:12,018
Not me, sister.
70
00:03:12,192 --> 00:03:14,542
I wasted 29.95 on
a male maximizer.
71
00:03:14,716 --> 00:03:15,886
Huge results?
72
00:03:16,065 --> 00:03:17,195
Hardly.
73
00:03:22,985 --> 00:03:24,415
Happy birthday, baby.
74
00:03:25,117 --> 00:03:29,597
Oh, Phyllis, on your knees in
front of another closed door.
75
00:03:31,646 --> 00:03:34,256
You know what they say. When
one door closes, another one...
76
00:03:34,431 --> 00:03:36,691
Hmm. Maybe not in your case.
77
00:03:37,434 --> 00:03:39,224
I can tell by your
swollen hooves
78
00:03:39,393 --> 00:03:41,403
your pregnancy is
coming along nicely.
79
00:03:42,700 --> 00:03:43,700
Jealous, are we?
80
00:03:43,875 --> 00:03:45,785
I've got a bun in my oven,
81
00:03:45,964 --> 00:03:47,964
and you can't even find
someone to light your pilot.
82
00:03:49,316 --> 00:03:50,876
Hold up, mommy oldest.
83
00:03:51,753 --> 00:03:54,713
Do you happen to know why that
mini-man Charles won't return my calls?
84
00:03:54,886 --> 00:03:56,496
Because he has caller I.D.?
85
00:03:58,150 --> 00:04:00,240
Look, I want him to
help me buy Mona a car.
86
00:04:00,414 --> 00:04:01,894
How did you get him
to buy Dee Dee's?
87
00:04:02,067 --> 00:04:04,717
I'm afraid you can't
use the method I used.
88
00:04:06,246 --> 00:04:08,646
Well, then I'm just gonna have
to give him a little face time.
89
00:04:08,683 --> 00:04:10,253
If the mountain won't
come to Mohammed,
90
00:04:10,424 --> 00:04:12,124
then Mohammed will
go to the mountain,
91
00:04:12,295 --> 00:04:14,515
and the mountain
ain't gonna like it.
92
00:04:23,959 --> 00:04:26,399
[Laughter]
93
00:04:31,445 --> 00:04:35,055
♪ Ohm-m-m-m-m... ♪
94
00:04:41,063 --> 00:04:43,153
[Telephone rings]
95
00:04:43,326 --> 00:04:44,456
[Chuckles]
96
00:04:44,632 --> 00:04:45,852
[Ring]
97
00:04:46,024 --> 00:04:47,904
I knew you guys
couldn't keep away.
98
00:04:48,853 --> 00:04:51,733
Oh. Yes, this is Mona Thorne.
99
00:04:53,205 --> 00:04:56,945
Well, I never really thought much
about my long-distance service.
100
00:04:59,299 --> 00:05:01,129
Sure, I got time.
101
00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:02,871
No, I'm not kiddin'.
102
00:05:05,783 --> 00:05:08,793
Hmm. Could you tell me more
about the connections plus plan?
103
00:05:08,960 --> 00:05:10,480
Maybe I'll treat myself.
104
00:05:10,658 --> 00:05:12,788
After all, it is my birthday.
105
00:05:12,964 --> 00:05:14,444
[Chuckles]
106
00:05:15,924 --> 00:05:17,454
Yes, it is.
107
00:05:18,535 --> 00:05:22,885
Well, of course I have better things
to do than talk to a telemarketer.
108
00:05:23,061 --> 00:05:24,981
No, no, don't go.
I was just kidding.
109
00:05:25,150 --> 00:05:27,230
Tell me more about the
near/far wherever-you-are plan.
110
00:05:27,283 --> 00:05:28,763
Uh...
111
00:05:28,937 --> 00:05:30,287
Hello?
112
00:05:31,026 --> 00:05:32,196
Hello?
113
00:05:37,728 --> 00:05:41,858
Whoa, $150 for a glass
horse with a icicle on his head?
114
00:05:44,474 --> 00:05:45,954
It's a unicorn.
115
00:05:46,128 --> 00:05:50,218
Oh. $150 for a unicorn
with a icicle on his head?
116
00:05:52,090 --> 00:05:54,660
Put it down, walk
away, and stay there.
117
00:05:55,311 --> 00:05:56,971
Yeah, Spencer, show some class.
118
00:05:57,139 --> 00:05:59,049
Dee Dee was thoughtful enough
119
00:05:59,228 --> 00:06:01,788
to bring is to this pretentious
boutique of unusable crap-a-doody.
120
00:06:03,058 --> 00:06:05,628
Haven't you ever heard
of birthday Karma?
121
00:06:05,800 --> 00:06:08,190
You give a nice gift,
and then the Karma gods
122
00:06:08,368 --> 00:06:10,458
reward whoever's
birthday comes next,
123
00:06:10,631 --> 00:06:13,021
I.e., mine in 3
days and 3 hours.
124
00:06:14,112 --> 00:06:18,122
Hi, I'm Casey. Let me know
if I can help you with anything.
125
00:06:18,290 --> 00:06:20,340
By-the-by, if you're
looking for a novel gift,
126
00:06:20,510 --> 00:06:22,690
we just got in some
darling Guatemalan teapots.
127
00:06:22,860 --> 00:06:25,820
Oh, Dee Dee, buy me a
Guatemalan teapot, por favor?
128
00:06:28,300 --> 00:06:29,300
Casey: Dee Dee?
129
00:06:29,432 --> 00:06:30,652
Dee Dee Thorne?
130
00:06:30,825 --> 00:06:32,165
Mm-hmm.
131
00:06:32,348 --> 00:06:33,738
They talked about
you in training.
132
00:06:33,915 --> 00:06:35,355
You are a legend
here at gittleson's.
133
00:06:35,395 --> 00:06:37,525
Oh, I'm sure that's not true.
134
00:06:37,701 --> 00:06:39,751
Law student, impeccable taste,
135
00:06:39,921 --> 00:06:41,661
can't resist the impulse buy.
136
00:06:42,663 --> 00:06:44,273
Forget I mentioned
that last part.
137
00:06:44,447 --> 00:06:47,407
Now, we just ot
these in from Austria.
138
00:06:47,581 --> 00:06:50,191
♪ Very shiny ♪
139
00:06:50,366 --> 00:06:52,106
Oh, it's beautiful.
140
00:06:52,281 --> 00:06:54,281
And it would go so
well with your eyes.
141
00:06:54,457 --> 00:06:57,627
Actually, I'm looking for
something for my sister,
142
00:06:57,808 --> 00:06:59,088
but maybe she'd
let me borrow it.
143
00:06:59,201 --> 00:07:00,421
Nah, that's not fair to her.
144
00:07:00,594 --> 00:07:01,754
I should buy this for myself.
145
00:07:01,856 --> 00:07:03,286
Hee, hee, hee!
146
00:07:03,466 --> 00:07:05,596
[Gasp] How I love tiaras.
147
00:07:05,773 --> 00:07:07,783
You know, wearing one
got me out of little league.
148
00:07:07,949 --> 00:07:09,599
[Clicks tongue]
149
00:07:15,043 --> 00:07:16,743
Excuse me.
150
00:07:16,914 --> 00:07:18,314
Well, well, well.
151
00:07:18,481 --> 00:07:21,271
If it isn't
Mr. Too-good-to-return-my-calls.
152
00:07:23,094 --> 00:07:24,774
Phyllis, I've been
meaning to call you back.
153
00:07:24,879 --> 00:07:27,709
Well, apparently meaning
doesn't translate into doing.
154
00:07:27,882 --> 00:07:29,342
Listen, I'm on my way
to a meeting, and...
155
00:07:29,361 --> 00:07:31,231
This won't take long.
156
00:07:31,407 --> 00:07:32,857
Look, Mona needs a new car,
and you know what you're gonna do?
157
00:07:32,887 --> 00:07:34,497
I'll tell you what
you're gonna do:
158
00:07:34,671 --> 00:07:36,131
You're gonna pony-up half.
That's what you're gonna do.
159
00:07:36,151 --> 00:07:37,741
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Back it on up a second.
160
00:07:37,761 --> 00:07:39,601
I'm not doing anything
'cause you say I should.
161
00:07:39,763 --> 00:07:43,113
Fyi, people, this
is my ex-husband.
162
00:07:45,943 --> 00:07:46,943
Phyllis,
163
00:07:47,118 --> 00:07:48,288
I have a meeting.
164
00:07:48,468 --> 00:07:50,208
You certainly do,
165
00:07:50,382 --> 00:07:52,912
and we're goin'
straight to old business.
166
00:07:56,737 --> 00:07:58,777
[Knock on door]
167
00:07:58,956 --> 00:08:00,306
[Giggling]
168
00:08:01,959 --> 00:08:03,479
Hi. Come on in.
169
00:08:03,657 --> 00:08:04,827
Why, thank you, kit-Kat.
170
00:08:05,006 --> 00:08:07,396
It is so great to see you-oo-oo.
171
00:08:08,139 --> 00:08:09,619
Ha, ha, ha!
172
00:08:10,359 --> 00:08:11,799
Are you being held
against your will?
173
00:08:11,839 --> 00:08:13,319
Should I press my panic button?
174
00:08:14,798 --> 00:08:18,498
Why? Would someone
come? Would they bring a cake?
175
00:08:19,324 --> 00:08:20,544
Oh, stop it.
176
00:08:20,717 --> 00:08:22,367
You're behaving
like a mixed-breed.
177
00:08:23,764 --> 00:08:25,514
What's coco doing on a leash?
178
00:08:25,679 --> 00:08:27,399
Well, since I'm pregnant,
I can't carry her anymore,
179
00:08:27,419 --> 00:08:29,119
but she refuses to accept that.
180
00:08:30,771 --> 00:08:33,901
So, did you come by to
wish me a happy birthday?
181
00:08:34,557 --> 00:08:37,297
Of course. Happy
birthday, peanut buttercup.
182
00:08:39,475 --> 00:08:41,125
You had no idea, did you?
183
00:08:41,303 --> 00:08:43,043
Heh-heh. Not the foggiest.
184
00:08:44,175 --> 00:08:46,045
I'm sorry. It's this
pregnancy brain.
185
00:08:46,221 --> 00:08:48,621
Normally, I'd remember.
You never remember.
186
00:08:48,789 --> 00:08:51,049
True, but this year I'm
blaming it on the pregnancy.
187
00:08:52,836 --> 00:08:54,526
Anyway, dewdrop,
have you seen Dee Dee?
188
00:08:54,708 --> 00:08:56,538
Huh. You know I could have sworn
189
00:08:56,710 --> 00:08:59,060
we were just talking about you
not remembering my birthday,
190
00:08:59,234 --> 00:09:00,984
and you kinda
just brushed by it.
191
00:09:01,149 --> 00:09:02,799
You do that a lot.
192
00:09:02,977 --> 00:09:05,327
I'm sick of people making
a big deal about birthdays
193
00:09:05,501 --> 00:09:07,171
and then never bothering
to follow through.
194
00:09:07,198 --> 00:09:08,808
I mean, what? Nobody cares?
195
00:09:10,245 --> 00:09:12,245
How long have you been
alone in this apartment?
196
00:09:13,988 --> 00:09:15,598
Maybe you need some company.
197
00:09:15,772 --> 00:09:17,012
I mean, coco can stay.
Coco's a great listener.
198
00:09:17,034 --> 00:09:18,434
[Gasp] Oh, dear lord.
199
00:09:18,601 --> 00:09:20,911
She's gone. My precious is gone.
200
00:09:21,082 --> 00:09:22,952
She probably just
ran down the hall.
201
00:09:23,127 --> 00:09:25,387
Oh, this would be such a
proper time for a sedative.
202
00:09:25,565 --> 00:09:27,255
Damn my fertility!
203
00:09:29,612 --> 00:09:31,222
Both: ♪ coco ♪
204
00:09:33,442 --> 00:09:35,052
What a depressing room.
205
00:09:37,489 --> 00:09:39,709
I'm so glad I got Dee
Dee her own washer/dryer.
206
00:09:39,883 --> 00:09:41,583
Dee Dee has her
own washer/dryer?
207
00:09:42,233 --> 00:09:43,543
Coco! oh...
208
00:09:44,279 --> 00:09:45,889
Coco.
209
00:09:46,063 --> 00:09:47,983
Mona: Oh, coco. There she is.
210
00:09:48,152 --> 00:09:51,422
Coco, I have a brisket
biscuit in my purse.
211
00:09:51,591 --> 00:09:53,001
Come here, sweetheart.
That's a good girl.
212
00:09:53,027 --> 00:09:54,457
Come along. Come on.
213
00:09:54,637 --> 00:09:56,767
Come on, baby. Ha, ha, ha!
214
00:09:56,944 --> 00:09:58,294
Ahh... now,
215
00:09:58,467 --> 00:10:00,207
let's talk about
your verbal assault
216
00:10:00,382 --> 00:10:01,952
on a defenseless pregnant woman.
217
00:10:06,127 --> 00:10:07,607
Oh, my god, it's an earthquake.
218
00:10:07,781 --> 00:10:09,781
Oh! Ooh!
219
00:10:09,957 --> 00:10:12,827
And Mona has this crazy idea
that her birthday is always a disaster,
220
00:10:13,003 --> 00:10:14,983
and a new car will prove
that good things can happen.
221
00:10:15,005 --> 00:10:16,875
Even if... whoa.
222
00:10:19,923 --> 00:10:21,143
Whoa!
223
00:10:21,316 --> 00:10:23,406
It's the big one!
It's the big one!
224
00:10:28,715 --> 00:10:31,275
We're trapped!
225
00:10:31,456 --> 00:10:33,146
Drop and roll! Duck and cover!
226
00:10:33,328 --> 00:10:34,758
I'll get on top of you!
227
00:10:41,989 --> 00:10:43,339
[Mona sighs]
228
00:10:43,512 --> 00:10:45,562
Is it over? Please
say it's over.
229
00:10:46,646 --> 00:10:47,726
Are you all right?
230
00:10:48,430 --> 00:10:50,170
I'm fine. Let's go.
231
00:10:50,345 --> 00:10:51,865
Gladly.
232
00:10:53,696 --> 00:10:54,736
Ooh.
233
00:10:54,915 --> 00:10:56,345
[Pounding]
234
00:10:56,525 --> 00:10:58,655
There's something
blocking the door.
235
00:11:00,921 --> 00:11:02,881
It must be the candy machine.
236
00:11:03,053 --> 00:11:06,063
Now, why would Charles put a
candy machine in a building this small?
237
00:11:09,930 --> 00:11:13,760
Well, we're all stuck
here for a while.
238
00:11:13,934 --> 00:11:18,504
Just coco, you, and me.
239
00:11:30,994 --> 00:11:34,174
What are we gonna do?
Nobody knows we're down here.
240
00:11:34,694 --> 00:11:37,574
Potato cake, there's so many
people that can't live without me,
241
00:11:37,740 --> 00:11:39,480
they'll find us soon.
242
00:11:39,655 --> 00:11:41,435
If not my family, my
sales team at neiman's.
243
00:11:43,267 --> 00:11:45,097
Let's eat.
244
00:11:45,269 --> 00:11:47,589
Oh, please don't tell me you're
gonna eat a brisket biscuit.
245
00:11:48,403 --> 00:11:50,583
I know you and your mother
have seen some lean times...
246
00:11:50,753 --> 00:11:52,023
Oh...
247
00:11:52,189 --> 00:11:53,189
But, no, dear.
248
00:11:53,277 --> 00:11:55,667
I've got fruit, pate,
249
00:11:55,845 --> 00:11:58,935
pickles, fried
olives, McNuggets.
250
00:11:59,109 --> 00:12:00,889
A pregnant diva's
always prepared.
251
00:12:02,722 --> 00:12:04,942
I think it stopped. Is
everybody all right?
252
00:12:05,115 --> 00:12:06,415
Yeah. [Panting]
253
00:12:07,422 --> 00:12:09,512
Come on up, Spence. It's over.
254
00:12:10,294 --> 00:12:13,044
Wow, that was
my first big quake.
255
00:12:13,210 --> 00:12:14,780
We don't have those in New York,
256
00:12:14,951 --> 00:12:17,261
just blizzards and
muggers. I miss it.
257
00:12:20,130 --> 00:12:22,180
It's all right,
Spencer. Let's go.
258
00:12:22,350 --> 00:12:24,660
Do you still want the bracelet?
259
00:12:24,831 --> 00:12:28,181
How can you think about
jewelry at a time like this?
260
00:12:28,356 --> 00:12:30,746
I've gotta find out
if my family's ok.
261
00:12:30,924 --> 00:12:32,274
Charge it to my account.
262
00:12:34,362 --> 00:12:36,802
Now, would you
please open this gate?
263
00:12:36,973 --> 00:12:38,453
[Electronic creak]
264
00:12:38,627 --> 00:12:39,977
It doesn't seem to be working.
265
00:12:40,150 --> 00:12:41,890
There's got to be
a manual override.
266
00:12:42,065 --> 00:12:43,695
So why don't you find it,
and we'll be on our merry?
267
00:12:43,719 --> 00:12:45,179
I'm sorry. I missed
that day of training.
268
00:12:45,199 --> 00:12:46,559
I had to get Nelly
furtado tickets.
269
00:12:46,722 --> 00:12:48,592
Oh, my gosh, I
love Nelly furtado!
270
00:12:49,333 --> 00:12:51,213
Was it great?
271
00:12:51,379 --> 00:12:52,969
Aw, great does not begin
to describe Nelly furtado.
272
00:12:52,989 --> 00:12:54,689
Well, I'm glad you
enjoyed yourself
273
00:12:54,861 --> 00:12:56,821
'cause now we're trapped
in this spooky hell hole!
274
00:12:58,168 --> 00:13:00,558
[Whistles] Pipe down, ladies!
275
00:13:00,736 --> 00:13:03,036
Now, why don't you girls
try and get that door open?
276
00:13:03,217 --> 00:13:04,737
And I'm gonna call for help.
277
00:13:04,914 --> 00:13:07,224
And if my sister spends
her whole birthday alone,
278
00:13:07,395 --> 00:13:08,975
even though that's what
she claims she wants,
279
00:13:09,005 --> 00:13:11,305
it'll be on your head, Casey.
280
00:13:12,835 --> 00:13:14,615
Whoa! aah!
281
00:13:17,187 --> 00:13:19,537
I swear he was a man
when we came in here.
282
00:13:22,976 --> 00:13:25,146
Nothing working. Nothing moving.
283
00:13:25,326 --> 00:13:26,326
We're stuck.
284
00:13:26,501 --> 00:13:28,241
Would you relax?
285
00:13:28,416 --> 00:13:29,896
We've already talked
to Dee Dee, Mona,
286
00:13:29,983 --> 00:13:31,773
and the jolly bald giant.
287
00:13:32,899 --> 00:13:34,939
They're safe. Don't be
such an antsy little man.
288
00:13:35,118 --> 00:13:36,288
We've gotta get out of here.
289
00:13:36,467 --> 00:13:37,557
We're running out of air.
290
00:13:43,387 --> 00:13:44,557
Sit down!
291
00:13:44,736 --> 00:13:46,476
Sit!
292
00:13:46,651 --> 00:13:48,481
Come on. This always
works with my patients.
293
00:13:48,653 --> 00:13:53,623
Now, I want you to close
your eyes and breathe deeply.
294
00:13:53,789 --> 00:13:56,529
Visualize a peaceful scene.
295
00:13:57,619 --> 00:13:59,269
So you're not here?
296
00:14:02,798 --> 00:14:04,928
Do you want help or not?
297
00:14:05,105 --> 00:14:08,795
Now, it's a warm and sunny day.
298
00:14:08,978 --> 00:14:13,588
Birds are singing, and you're
drive down the coast with Mona
299
00:14:13,765 --> 00:14:15,935
in her brand-new car.
300
00:14:17,378 --> 00:14:19,508
[Humming]
301
00:14:19,684 --> 00:14:21,214
How can you be so calm?
302
00:14:21,382 --> 00:14:23,432
I found a stretch
Mark this morning.
303
00:14:23,601 --> 00:14:25,821
God is not gonna punish
me twice in one day.
304
00:14:27,736 --> 00:14:30,256
Well, I'm ready for a
break in the excitement...
305
00:14:30,434 --> 00:14:32,484
Big earthquake on my birthday.
306
00:14:32,654 --> 00:14:36,014
Now I'm trapped in the laundry
room with my... Stepmother.
307
00:14:37,746 --> 00:14:39,136
That sounds so cinderella-ish,
308
00:14:39,313 --> 00:14:41,013
as if I favor one
daughter over the other.
309
00:14:41,184 --> 00:14:44,324
Oh-ho... isn't there anything
else you can call me?
310
00:14:44,492 --> 00:14:47,972
Well, I guess I could call you a
tall lady who married my father.
311
00:14:49,236 --> 00:14:51,666
Or I could call you odd
plate at Thanksgiving.
312
00:14:52,804 --> 00:14:53,984
I got a good one.
313
00:14:54,154 --> 00:14:56,034
How about... Mona?
314
00:14:56,199 --> 00:14:57,849
No, I don't like that.
315
00:14:59,681 --> 00:15:03,421
Do you even realize you have
never called me by my name?
316
00:15:03,598 --> 00:15:04,988
What do you mean, ginger snap?
317
00:15:05,165 --> 00:15:06,725
That, right there!
318
00:15:06,906 --> 00:15:09,256
I've been every
variation of cookie, candy,
319
00:15:09,430 --> 00:15:11,910
insect, and squash known to man,
320
00:15:12,085 --> 00:15:13,515
but never Mona.
321
00:15:13,695 --> 00:15:16,825
Hmm. I wasn't aware
of that, butternut.
322
00:15:17,003 --> 00:15:18,613
Oh!
323
00:15:18,787 --> 00:15:20,697
[Snoring]
324
00:15:23,096 --> 00:15:24,226
Hey!
325
00:15:24,401 --> 00:15:26,321
Eh...
326
00:15:26,490 --> 00:15:27,670
Oh.
327
00:15:27,839 --> 00:15:30,149
I actually fell asleep. I know.
328
00:15:30,320 --> 00:15:31,970
You still drool.
329
00:15:34,194 --> 00:15:35,674
So, you feel better?
330
00:15:36,544 --> 00:15:38,154
Yes. Thank you.
331
00:15:39,373 --> 00:15:42,553
How long we been stuck in
this hot box anyway, 4 hours?
332
00:15:42,724 --> 00:15:44,124
20 minutes.
333
00:15:46,032 --> 00:15:48,562
It feels longer.
Like our marriage.
334
00:15:48,730 --> 00:15:51,390
722 days of hell.
335
00:15:52,560 --> 00:15:54,040
We did have one good day.
336
00:15:54,823 --> 00:15:56,653
The day I signed
the divorce papers?
337
00:15:58,435 --> 00:16:00,635
Actually, I was talking about
the day that Mona was born.
338
00:16:01,525 --> 00:16:03,135
It was an amazing day.
339
00:16:04,137 --> 00:16:05,787
She was so beautiful.
340
00:16:05,965 --> 00:16:07,745
Still is.
341
00:16:07,923 --> 00:16:09,713
[Chuckles]
342
00:16:09,881 --> 00:16:11,641
What were we thinking,
having a kid so young?
343
00:16:11,709 --> 00:16:13,059
[Chuckles]
344
00:16:13,233 --> 00:16:15,673
I remember the
day at the hospital.
345
00:16:15,844 --> 00:16:18,194
You were pushing.
I was panicking.
346
00:16:18,368 --> 00:16:21,208
Yeah, as usual, I was doing all the
work, you were taking all the credit.
347
00:16:23,373 --> 00:16:24,683
You never let anything go.
348
00:16:24,853 --> 00:16:26,423
No.
349
00:16:26,594 --> 00:16:28,734
So why won't you
help buy Mona a car?
350
00:16:28,900 --> 00:16:30,290
I will.
351
00:16:30,467 --> 00:16:32,897
You what? It's only fair.
352
00:16:33,079 --> 00:16:35,259
Dee Dee got one out
of me. Mona should, too.
353
00:16:35,429 --> 00:16:38,209
So I finally wore
you down. [Chuckles]
354
00:16:38,388 --> 00:16:41,478
The only thing that you've
worn down is my will to live.
355
00:16:46,266 --> 00:16:49,486
Phyllis, I have never had a
problem taking care of our daughter.
356
00:16:51,184 --> 00:16:53,194
You just never let me
do the big things for Mona.
357
00:16:53,360 --> 00:16:55,450
So why the change of heart?
358
00:16:55,623 --> 00:16:59,543
Did you know that
Mona hates her birthday?
359
00:17:00,758 --> 00:17:03,718
Our daughter hates the
day she was born, Charles.
360
00:17:04,197 --> 00:17:07,327
So who's supposed to
dig her up out of that funk?
361
00:17:07,504 --> 00:17:08,984
Us, her parents.
362
00:17:09,158 --> 00:17:11,468
But we've got to
do something big,
363
00:17:11,639 --> 00:17:13,639
and we've got to do it together.
364
00:17:13,815 --> 00:17:15,075
I hear you.
365
00:17:16,209 --> 00:17:19,039
So the next time Mona
needs something, just ask.
366
00:17:19,212 --> 00:17:22,132
But know that I won't be
responding to yourdemands.
367
00:17:22,302 --> 00:17:24,612
I didn't on our wedding
night, and I won't now.
368
00:17:33,878 --> 00:17:36,618
Ok, Charles, but unlike
our wedding night,
369
00:17:36,794 --> 00:17:39,194
I'm leavin' this
elevator satisfied.
370
00:17:42,974 --> 00:17:45,134
And then there was this
time... And this was wonderful...
371
00:17:45,151 --> 00:17:47,371
A bunch of us took a
balloon ride over sonoma
372
00:17:47,544 --> 00:17:49,764
and then had a fabulous
champagne brunch.
373
00:17:49,938 --> 00:17:51,458
Wow.mm-hmm. Yeah.
374
00:17:51,635 --> 00:17:52,875
If my birthdays were like that,
375
00:17:52,984 --> 00:17:55,034
I wouldn't hate 'em so much,
376
00:17:55,204 --> 00:17:58,734
which is probably why I got
a little testy with you earlier.
377
00:17:58,903 --> 00:18:01,303
I'm sorry. I'm sorry, too.
378
00:18:01,471 --> 00:18:04,171
I promise I'll remember
your birthday next year.Mmm.
379
00:18:04,344 --> 00:18:07,614
Sweetie, if you put all
your hope into one day,
380
00:18:07,782 --> 00:18:09,442
you're bound to be disappointed.
381
00:18:09,610 --> 00:18:11,180
Why not celebrate every day?
382
00:18:11,960 --> 00:18:13,880
I never thought
about it that way.
383
00:18:14,049 --> 00:18:16,379
And the bonus is, if you don't
make a big deal about your birthday,
384
00:18:16,399 --> 00:18:18,619
no one can keep
track of your age.
385
00:18:21,883 --> 00:18:24,363
Um, how old are you
anyway? I'll never tell.
386
00:18:24,538 --> 00:18:26,838
They'll have to cut me
open and count the rings.
387
00:18:28,716 --> 00:18:31,146
Here's to staying 35 forever.
388
00:18:31,327 --> 00:18:34,547
I'll drink to that.
Ha, ha... oh!
389
00:18:34,722 --> 00:18:37,122
I think someone just
wished you a happy birthday.
390
00:18:37,290 --> 00:18:38,900
You felt the baby kick?
391
00:18:39,988 --> 00:18:41,468
For the first time.
392
00:18:41,642 --> 00:18:42,772
Go ahead. Feel.
393
00:18:44,906 --> 00:18:46,206
I felt something.
394
00:18:46,386 --> 00:18:48,296
I think the baby likes you.
395
00:18:48,475 --> 00:18:49,865
Go ahead. Feel again. Here.
396
00:18:51,913 --> 00:18:53,783
Ah, that is amazing.
397
00:18:53,958 --> 00:18:55,178
Actually, that was me burping.
398
00:18:55,351 --> 00:18:56,401
Oh.
399
00:18:58,180 --> 00:18:59,660
[Pounding on door]
400
00:18:59,834 --> 00:19:01,034
Man: Hello? Is anyone in there?
401
00:19:01,096 --> 00:19:03,046
Yes! We're here! We're here!
402
00:19:03,229 --> 00:19:05,749
We'll have you out
in a minute. Yes!
403
00:19:06,449 --> 00:19:08,889
Well, I guess the
picnic is over, Mona.
404
00:19:10,584 --> 00:19:12,154
Or just starting.
405
00:19:13,891 --> 00:19:15,281
Whee.
406
00:19:15,458 --> 00:19:17,198
Ha, ha, ha! Ha, ha, ha!
407
00:19:19,593 --> 00:19:23,033
I gotta say it is nice to be
with everybody on my birthday.
408
00:19:23,205 --> 00:19:24,595
Phyllis: Aw, see, Mona,
409
00:19:24,772 --> 00:19:26,992
even mother nature
couldn't let you be alone.
410
00:19:27,166 --> 00:19:30,556
And I won't let you be
without an awesome gift.
411
00:19:31,431 --> 00:19:34,041
Wow! This is beautiful.
412
00:19:34,216 --> 00:19:36,346
I can't believe you
didn't keep it for yourself.
413
00:19:38,960 --> 00:19:41,310
Well, at least this
birthday was memorable.
414
00:19:41,484 --> 00:19:43,574
Had a picnic, survived
an earthquake,
415
00:19:43,747 --> 00:19:45,227
and with my new
long-distance plan,
416
00:19:45,401 --> 00:19:47,841
I can call Guam for
free on the weekends.
417
00:19:48,665 --> 00:19:50,265
Oh, my, where did
you get these crackers.
418
00:19:50,406 --> 00:19:52,316
They taste just
like brisket. Mmm!
419
00:19:56,543 --> 00:19:58,203
I think you've had enough, ma.
420
00:19:58,371 --> 00:20:01,291
What? It'll give her strong
teeth and a shiny coat.
421
00:20:07,510 --> 00:20:09,820
Guess what dad's
give me for my birthday.
422
00:20:09,991 --> 00:20:12,041
A brand-new car! Yay!
423
00:20:12,211 --> 00:20:14,651
Hey, that was my idea.
424
00:20:14,822 --> 00:20:16,612
Now is not the time
to quibble about credit.
425
00:20:16,780 --> 00:20:18,650
Quibble. Don't tell
me not to quibble.
426
00:20:18,826 --> 00:20:20,606
I'll quibble when
I want to quibble.
427
00:20:20,784 --> 00:20:22,334
Why do we always have to
quibble when you want to quibble?
428
00:20:22,351 --> 00:20:24,441
Ah, these are the moments
I missed growing up.
429
00:20:24,614 --> 00:20:26,234
See, you...
430
00:20:48,508 --> 00:20:50,468
Whoo-hoo! Hee, hee, hee!
431
00:20:50,518 --> 00:20:55,068
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