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1
00:00:08,573 --> 00:00:10,883
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
2
00:00:10,923 --> 00:00:14,413
KID CAPRI: It's the
Russell Simmons' Def Comedy Jam.
3
00:00:14,449 --> 00:00:16,669
[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
4
00:00:39,909 --> 00:00:42,909
[HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING]
5
00:00:42,955 --> 00:00:46,605
Ladies and gentlemen
do me a big, big, big favor.
6
00:00:46,655 --> 00:00:48,915
Put your hands together
for a great man.
7
00:00:48,961 --> 00:00:52,661
His name is
Mr. Martin Lawrence!
8
00:00:54,315 --> 00:00:56,355
[AUDIENCE CHEERING
AND APPLAUDING]
9
00:01:04,934 --> 00:01:06,764
Yo. Wassup?
10
00:01:06,805 --> 00:01:08,195
[AUDIENCE EXCLAIM]
11
00:01:08,242 --> 00:01:09,942
Give it up for my man,
Kid Capri.
12
00:01:09,982 --> 00:01:12,462
[AUDIENCE CHEERING
AND APPLAUDING]
13
00:01:13,812 --> 00:01:16,082
Yeah.
14
00:01:16,119 --> 00:01:18,989
Whoa, man. This is nice.
Brothers hanging out.
15
00:01:19,035 --> 00:01:21,255
How y'all feel?AUDIENCE: All right.
16
00:01:21,298 --> 00:01:24,778
You doin' good?
Hey, you motherfuckers are long.
17
00:01:24,823 --> 00:01:27,653
You look like the Thing
or some shit like that.
18
00:01:27,696 --> 00:01:29,736
That's your real hair?No.
19
00:01:29,785 --> 00:01:31,125
Ah, okay. Oops.
20
00:01:31,178 --> 00:01:32,958
[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]
21
00:01:33,005 --> 00:01:35,135
Whoo!
22
00:01:35,182 --> 00:01:38,532
I know when
he's done with you... [MUMBLES] Fuck it.
23
00:01:38,576 --> 00:01:42,146
Oh, that's nice.
I'd like to play with that if you get some time later.
24
00:01:42,189 --> 00:01:43,969
[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]
25
00:01:44,016 --> 00:01:46,446
Yeah, what's going on?
26
00:01:46,497 --> 00:01:49,457
My man's in the house.
Give him a round of applause. My partner!
27
00:01:49,500 --> 00:01:51,890
This boy's bad.
Wesley Snipes.
28
00:01:51,937 --> 00:01:54,237
[AUDIENCE CHEERING
AND APPLAUDING]
29
00:01:54,288 --> 00:01:55,508
[MARTIN EXCLAIMS]
30
00:01:58,683 --> 00:02:00,823
You a bad
motherfucker, boy.
31
00:02:00,859 --> 00:02:03,299
You smile at me,
motherfucker. Don't sit there.
32
00:02:03,340 --> 00:02:04,690
[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]
33
00:02:04,733 --> 00:02:06,823
This ain't New Jack City.
Wassup boy?
34
00:02:06,865 --> 00:02:08,295
[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]
35
00:02:08,345 --> 00:02:10,295
Nigga sittin' there
like he Nino.
36
00:02:10,347 --> 00:02:12,037
[AUDIENCE CHEERING
AND APPLAUDING]
37
00:02:15,613 --> 00:02:17,833
You know it, motherfucker.
Wassup?
38
00:02:17,876 --> 00:02:19,786
Bad chocolate motherfucker,
ain't he?
39
00:02:21,228 --> 00:02:24,318
That motherfucker's
too cold.
40
00:02:24,361 --> 00:02:28,931
He did some shit in Jack City
that just made motherfuckers, "Oh, shit!"
41
00:02:28,974 --> 00:02:31,504
He a bad motherfucker.
I know you got it good, Wes.
42
00:02:31,542 --> 00:02:33,242
Women can't leave
your ass now, can they?
43
00:02:33,283 --> 00:02:34,983
I bet in the day
they used to dog you,
44
00:02:35,024 --> 00:02:37,594
"You ain't shit.
Get your ass outta here.
45
00:02:37,635 --> 00:02:40,025
"You little
black motherfucker. Get the fuck outta here."
46
00:02:40,072 --> 00:02:41,732
[AUDIENCE CHEERING
AND APPLAUDING]
47
00:02:43,902 --> 00:02:45,562
[AUDIENCE HOOTING]
48
00:02:49,125 --> 00:02:51,865
Now you
the motherfuckin' man.
49
00:02:51,910 --> 00:02:54,520
Now you tell a woman
like this, "Get your shit and get out."
50
00:02:54,565 --> 00:02:56,645
And she like this...
51
00:02:56,698 --> 00:02:59,308
[PANTING][AUDIENCE LAUGHS]
52
00:02:59,353 --> 00:03:01,443
"What's wrong with you?
53
00:03:01,485 --> 00:03:03,265
"I'm sayin' just talk to me,
all right?
54
00:03:03,313 --> 00:03:06,103
"You ain't got... I mean,
why you gettin' all upset?"
55
00:03:07,970 --> 00:03:10,710
It's the American way.
56
00:03:10,755 --> 00:03:12,625
[AUDIENCE CHEERING
AND APPLAUDING]
57
00:03:14,411 --> 00:03:16,541
[AUDIENCE WHISTLES AND HOOTS]
58
00:03:18,981 --> 00:03:21,161
Y'all look good though, man.
Thank you for comin' out
59
00:03:21,201 --> 00:03:22,591
and supporting
the Def Comedy Jam.
60
00:03:22,637 --> 00:03:26,247
Thank you very much.
Y'all look real good.
61
00:03:26,293 --> 00:03:28,693
Some beautiful shit, man.
Feel good bein' black!
62
00:03:28,730 --> 00:03:30,860
For real. For real.
63
00:03:30,906 --> 00:03:33,206
Comin' to the stage,
since you're havin' so much fun,
64
00:03:33,256 --> 00:03:35,126
I know you're gonna enjoy him.
65
00:03:35,171 --> 00:03:37,571
He's from...
He's one of the hottest comedians in Jersey,
66
00:03:37,608 --> 00:03:40,388
and he's here
to kick it up.[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
67
00:03:40,437 --> 00:03:44,087
Yo. Give it up
for Bill Bellamy.
68
00:03:44,136 --> 00:03:47,916
[AUDIENCE CHEERING
AND APPLAUDING]
69
00:03:47,966 --> 00:03:49,966
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]
70
00:03:57,367 --> 00:03:59,237
What's up New York?
71
00:03:59,282 --> 00:04:01,112
[AUDIENCE CHEERING
AND APPLAUDING]
72
00:04:01,153 --> 00:04:03,423
Hey! We in the house.
73
00:04:03,460 --> 00:04:07,290
Oh, shit. Give it up
for all the ladies in the house, fellas.
74
00:04:07,334 --> 00:04:09,474
Let the dogs loose.
75
00:04:09,510 --> 00:04:11,290
[AUDIENCE BARKING]
76
00:04:11,338 --> 00:04:13,038
God damn!
77
00:04:13,078 --> 00:04:15,428
I've been watching TV a lot,
trippin' me out.
78
00:04:15,472 --> 00:04:18,432
Y'all... everybody here
seen those early pregnancy test commercials?
79
00:04:18,475 --> 00:04:20,475
You notice they only got
white people on them?
80
00:04:20,521 --> 00:04:23,521
And everybody
in the commercial is happy?
81
00:04:23,567 --> 00:04:26,137
The girl come out
the bathroom, "Honey..."
82
00:04:26,178 --> 00:04:28,008
[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]
83
00:04:28,050 --> 00:04:30,840
"Guess what?"
84
00:04:30,879 --> 00:04:34,319
And he's sitting
on the couch, "What, babe?"
85
00:04:34,361 --> 00:04:36,321
"We are positive."
"Fuckin' A!"
86
00:04:36,363 --> 00:04:38,023
[AUDIENCE CHEERING
AND APPLAUDING]
87
00:04:42,194 --> 00:04:43,894
That shit ain't real!
88
00:04:43,935 --> 00:04:46,975
I want to see a sister,
I want to see a sister.
89
00:04:47,025 --> 00:04:49,325
Every brother in here
want to just see one sister go in the bathroom.
90
00:04:49,376 --> 00:04:51,766
She be in there,
she be like... [CLICKS TONGUE]
91
00:04:51,813 --> 00:04:54,163
"Damn."[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]
92
00:05:01,083 --> 00:05:02,563
[INAUDIBLE]
93
00:05:05,740 --> 00:05:07,390
[SIGHS]
94
00:05:07,437 --> 00:05:10,217
"Guess what?"[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]
95
00:05:10,266 --> 00:05:11,826
"Your ass need a job."
96
00:05:11,876 --> 00:05:13,526
[AUDIENCE CHEERING
AND APPLAUDING]
97
00:05:15,271 --> 00:05:18,321
[CHUCKLES]
You know what I'm sayin'?
98
00:05:18,361 --> 00:05:21,581
The shit is crazy, man.
Crazy shit, man.
99
00:05:21,625 --> 00:05:23,625
Lot of crazy stuff
happened to me, man.
100
00:05:23,671 --> 00:05:26,061
New York is fly,
but one thing I don't like about New York, man,
101
00:05:26,108 --> 00:05:29,498
when you come over here
and you drive, every time, tell the truth.
102
00:05:29,546 --> 00:05:32,026
When you park on a bad street,
don't you always turn around
103
00:05:32,070 --> 00:05:34,330
and look at your car
like you may never see that motherfucker again?
104
00:05:34,377 --> 00:05:35,767
[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]
105
00:05:38,338 --> 00:05:40,078
Come on now,
I don't feel like walkin'.
106
00:05:41,950 --> 00:05:43,690
Motherfuckers crazy, man!
107
00:05:43,734 --> 00:05:45,694
They got this new car alarm
I want to tell y'all about.
108
00:05:45,736 --> 00:05:47,996
Every brother in here, sister,
got a nice car.
109
00:05:48,043 --> 00:05:51,053
They got this new car alarm
that be out in '92, right?
110
00:05:51,089 --> 00:05:53,959
If they steal your car,
the car alarm will call your house.
111
00:05:54,005 --> 00:05:55,435
This shit is real.
112
00:05:55,485 --> 00:05:57,435
I said to myself,
"Imagine this, right?"
113
00:05:57,487 --> 00:05:59,227
Saturday night
'bout four o'clock in the morning.
114
00:05:59,271 --> 00:06:00,751
You asleep. [SNORING]
115
00:06:03,406 --> 00:06:05,096
[IMITATES PHONE RINGING]
116
00:06:06,409 --> 00:06:08,409
[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]
117
00:06:09,412 --> 00:06:10,762
[SNORING]
118
00:06:10,805 --> 00:06:12,105
[IMITATES PHONE RINGING]
119
00:06:14,591 --> 00:06:16,251
"Uh, hello?"
120
00:06:16,288 --> 00:06:17,898
"Yo, Bill, wake up."
121
00:06:17,942 --> 00:06:19,992
[AUDIENCE LAUGHING]
122
00:06:24,253 --> 00:06:26,393
"Who is it?"
"It's the car, man."
123
00:06:26,429 --> 00:06:27,779
[AUDIENCE CHEERING
AND LAUGHING]
124
00:06:27,822 --> 00:06:30,962
[CRYING] "Ah, man!
They got me down here
125
00:06:30,999 --> 00:06:33,039
"and they takin' out
the radio and everything."
126
00:06:33,088 --> 00:06:35,438
[AUDIENCE CHEERING
AND APPLAUDING]
127
00:06:36,961 --> 00:06:38,441
[SOBS]
128
00:06:39,964 --> 00:06:41,534
"All right, all right.
Where you at?"
129
00:06:41,575 --> 00:06:46,485
[SOBBING] "I don't know.
You better hurry up.
130
00:06:46,536 --> 00:06:48,576
"Wait a minute,
here they come. I'll call you back."
131
00:06:48,625 --> 00:06:51,055
[AUDIENCE CHEERING
AND APPLAUDING]
132
00:06:51,106 --> 00:06:52,626
That shit is crazy.
133
00:06:53,500 --> 00:06:55,850
Crazy shit, man.
134
00:06:55,893 --> 00:06:58,553
Women in here, man.
I was reading an article recently.
135
00:06:58,592 --> 00:07:00,592
Women want to be made...
They want you to make love to 'em good.
136
00:07:00,637 --> 00:07:02,117
Am I right, ladies?
137
00:07:02,160 --> 00:07:04,730
Y'all wanna hear that shit?AUDIENCE: Yeah!
138
00:07:04,772 --> 00:07:07,912
Brothers, you gotta
kick that shit out!
139
00:07:07,949 --> 00:07:12,559
Don't give out no weak shit
'cause women will talk.
140
00:07:12,606 --> 00:07:14,346
And the ones that clap
done told,
141
00:07:14,390 --> 00:07:16,520
they don't fuck around.
142
00:07:16,566 --> 00:07:18,046
You could tell, too.
143
00:07:18,089 --> 00:07:19,699
You could tell
when you give out some weak shit.
144
00:07:19,743 --> 00:07:21,483
You be tryin' to find
your shoes you be like, "Damn..."
145
00:07:23,138 --> 00:07:24,488
"Where my shoes at?"
146
00:07:24,531 --> 00:07:25,711
"They right here."
147
00:07:25,749 --> 00:07:28,319
[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
148
00:07:28,360 --> 00:07:30,800
"Get your sorry ass
outta here."
149
00:07:30,841 --> 00:07:33,581
[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]
150
00:07:33,627 --> 00:07:36,367
Serious, man.
You know what's crazy, too, about women
151
00:07:36,412 --> 00:07:37,812
that's different from men?
152
00:07:37,848 --> 00:07:40,238
Women can have
orgasms, right?
153
00:07:40,285 --> 00:07:42,065
And it just looks
so pretty, man.
154
00:07:42,113 --> 00:07:43,903
You ever seen a woman
have an orgasm? She's like...
155
00:07:45,682 --> 00:07:47,472
[AUDIENCE CHEERING
AND APPLAUDING]
156
00:07:59,435 --> 00:08:01,045
"Don't touch me,
don't touch."
157
00:08:02,873 --> 00:08:05,833
Right? There ain't
a brother in here
158
00:08:05,876 --> 00:08:07,916
that can have
a smooth orgasm,
159
00:08:07,965 --> 00:08:10,005
and sisters know we be
tryin' our best, right? We be in there...
160
00:08:10,054 --> 00:08:11,234
Ugh!
161
00:08:12,143 --> 00:08:14,153
[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]
162
00:08:17,061 --> 00:08:19,371
Now, Imma...
163
00:08:19,411 --> 00:08:22,891
Hold up. Hold up.
Then we just get like, crazy retarded. We like...
164
00:08:24,416 --> 00:08:25,846
[UNINTELLIGIBLE NOISES]
165
00:08:28,856 --> 00:08:30,466
[UNINTELLIGIBLE NOISES]
166
00:08:36,603 --> 00:08:39,213
That shit is crazy, man!
167
00:08:39,257 --> 00:08:41,037
Then you try to have...
168
00:08:41,085 --> 00:08:42,955
Then you have a woman,
they ask you questions and shit
169
00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:45,220
when you havin' an orgasm.
You don't even know the English language.
170
00:08:45,263 --> 00:08:47,353
She be like, "Honey, honey,
wipe your mouth.
171
00:08:47,396 --> 00:08:48,786
"Stop makin' that face."
You be like...
172
00:08:48,832 --> 00:08:52,622
[UNINTELLIGIBLE NOISES]
173
00:08:56,448 --> 00:08:59,668
Crazy shit, man.
Shit is crazy.
174
00:08:59,713 --> 00:09:01,413
Before I leave, though,
I just want to say something.
175
00:09:01,453 --> 00:09:03,503
If you got somebody
that you care about
176
00:09:03,543 --> 00:09:05,813
and they love you
and they treat you right, you gotta hold onto 'em.
177
00:09:05,849 --> 00:09:07,239
Give a round of applause
for that shit, y'all.
178
00:09:07,285 --> 00:09:09,235
[AUDIENCE APPLAUD]
179
00:09:09,287 --> 00:09:11,067
'Cause it's hard, man.
180
00:09:11,115 --> 00:09:13,545
It's hard tryin' to
find somebody today
181
00:09:13,596 --> 00:09:15,116
that's, like,
got all their teeth
182
00:09:15,163 --> 00:09:17,253
and everything workin',
and shit. It's crazy.
183
00:09:17,295 --> 00:09:19,205
You know
what's crazy, right?
184
00:09:19,254 --> 00:09:21,604
How many times
have you seen someone that you like, right?
185
00:09:21,648 --> 00:09:23,478
Somebody introduce you
to 'em, right?
186
00:09:23,519 --> 00:09:24,609
You be out there,
you be like, "Hey, how you doin'?"
187
00:09:24,651 --> 00:09:26,131
And they be like...
188
00:09:27,436 --> 00:09:28,736
[MOUTHING] Fuck you.
189
00:09:30,134 --> 00:09:32,014
I'll show you
a prime example tonight
190
00:09:32,049 --> 00:09:33,879
why the shit
never works out, right?
191
00:09:33,921 --> 00:09:35,711
Now say, for instance,
I like this lady right here.
192
00:09:35,749 --> 00:09:37,529
Check it out, right?
Nice lookin' lady.
193
00:09:37,577 --> 00:09:39,267
She would not like me.
194
00:09:39,317 --> 00:09:40,967
She would like him
right here. See?
195
00:09:41,015 --> 00:09:42,835
See? See this brother
right here?
196
00:09:42,886 --> 00:09:44,706
But he would not
like your ass.
197
00:09:44,758 --> 00:09:46,928
[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]
198
00:09:46,977 --> 00:09:49,887
No, 'cause he'd
like him right there.[AUDIENCE EXCLAIMS]
199
00:09:49,937 --> 00:09:52,107
My name is Bill Bellamy.
It's been real, y'all. Peace.
200
00:09:52,156 --> 00:09:54,636
[AUDIENCE CHEERING
AND APPLAUDING]
201
00:09:54,681 --> 00:09:56,861
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]
202
00:10:06,040 --> 00:10:08,170
Give him a round
of applause. Bill Bellamy.
203
00:10:08,216 --> 00:10:09,826
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
204
00:10:11,698 --> 00:10:13,218
I don't know why
he tellin' jokes.
205
00:10:13,264 --> 00:10:14,924
The motherfucker
just a model, man.
206
00:10:14,962 --> 00:10:17,792
Damn. Pretty motherfucker.
207
00:10:17,834 --> 00:10:21,064
New Jack City,right?
208
00:10:21,098 --> 00:10:24,668
New Jack City.
Yo, you hit that line, "Pretty motherfucker."
209
00:10:28,323 --> 00:10:32,073
So, yo, we gonna keep this
show rollin'. Hope you're having a good time.
210
00:10:32,109 --> 00:10:35,419
Coming to the stage is one
of my personal favorites.
211
00:10:35,460 --> 00:10:38,680
Um, this is one of the
baddest women out, in my opinion.
212
00:10:38,725 --> 00:10:40,155
Yo, she's bad and
she's gonna do work,
213
00:10:40,204 --> 00:10:41,514
and I know you're
gonna love her.
214
00:10:41,553 --> 00:10:43,513
She's from
Oakland, California.
215
00:10:43,555 --> 00:10:45,165
Yo, give it up
for Laura Hayes.
216
00:10:49,083 --> 00:10:50,823
[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
217
00:10:55,655 --> 00:10:57,695
Hey. Oh, shit.
218
00:10:57,744 --> 00:10:59,274
[LAUGHS]
219
00:10:59,310 --> 00:11:01,570
Thank you, Martin,
for that beautiful introduction.
220
00:11:01,617 --> 00:11:03,877
Remind me to suck...
I mean, thank you later.
221
00:11:03,924 --> 00:11:05,804
[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]
222
00:11:05,839 --> 00:11:07,359
Hold it!
223
00:11:07,405 --> 00:11:09,445
See?
224
00:11:09,494 --> 00:11:12,454
I'm from a big family of girls
you know, we been,
225
00:11:12,497 --> 00:11:14,497
you know,
raised to stick together.
226
00:11:14,543 --> 00:11:17,593
Yeah, they all big, too.
227
00:11:17,633 --> 00:11:19,423
Yeah, but you know
how your sisters and your girlfriends
228
00:11:19,461 --> 00:11:21,641
won't tell you when
your man foolin' around?
229
00:11:21,681 --> 00:11:24,381
Oh, we tell, baby.
Go right to the phone.
230
00:11:24,422 --> 00:11:28,432
"Hey, sis?
Yeah, motherfucker down at the mall.
231
00:11:28,470 --> 00:11:31,210
"Oh, no, you right.
You right. That's disrespectful.
232
00:11:31,255 --> 00:11:34,035
"Mr. Motherfucker
down at the mall.
233
00:11:34,084 --> 00:11:37,524
"Yeah, girl, with some
tramp with blonde extensions in her hair."
234
00:11:37,566 --> 00:11:42,746
'Cause you know every time
when there's a problem, my mother is the dispatcher.
235
00:11:42,789 --> 00:11:45,179
She'll dispatch us out
whenever there's a problem.
236
00:11:45,226 --> 00:11:47,006
She'll get right
on the phone,
237
00:11:47,054 --> 00:11:49,584
"Laura, Bertha, Julie, Ruthie.
Get on over to Alice's house.
238
00:11:49,621 --> 00:11:52,061
"That nigga done read
a black man guide."
239
00:11:52,102 --> 00:11:54,932
So, we jump in the car
and we rollin'
240
00:11:54,975 --> 00:11:58,015
and I got a 1000 pounds
ridin' with me, God damn it.
241
00:11:59,893 --> 00:12:02,553
We slappin' five
over the seat and shit.
242
00:12:03,897 --> 00:12:05,547
Get to my
baby sister's house
243
00:12:05,594 --> 00:12:07,514
and this nigga's just
about to swing and I go,
244
00:12:07,552 --> 00:12:10,772
"Oh, no, motherfucker,
not today! God damn it. Fuck that!"
245
00:12:10,817 --> 00:12:12,557
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING
AND CHEERING]
246
00:12:31,011 --> 00:12:32,361
Not today.
247
00:12:33,796 --> 00:12:34,876
No, baby.
248
00:12:35,711 --> 00:12:37,451
No! Mmm-mmm.
249
00:12:38,322 --> 00:12:39,672
C'mon!
250
00:12:41,369 --> 00:12:42,369
No.
251
00:12:43,632 --> 00:12:47,292
No, no, no. See?
252
00:12:47,331 --> 00:12:51,731
'Cause Mr. and Mrs. Hayes
didn't raise no punk bitches, you see?
253
00:12:53,163 --> 00:12:56,433
Oh, yeah, and we all
wear hair, too.
254
00:12:56,471 --> 00:13:00,211
I love my hair.
I got about 40 or 50 of these at home.
255
00:13:00,257 --> 00:13:03,217
Whenever I meet a man,
I take him to the wig wall,
256
00:13:03,260 --> 00:13:07,000
I say, "Now look, you just
pick whatever one you want to do the wild thing in."
257
00:13:09,136 --> 00:13:11,136
And ladies,
you know how men,
258
00:13:11,181 --> 00:13:13,181
people be fuckin' with you
about your hair and your hair wigs?
259
00:13:13,227 --> 00:13:15,577
Fuck that![APPLAUSE]
260
00:13:15,620 --> 00:13:17,410
Fuck that!
261
00:13:17,448 --> 00:13:19,318
'Cause they ask me
all the time, "Is that your hair?"
262
00:13:19,363 --> 00:13:20,843
"I still have the receipt."
263
00:13:26,544 --> 00:13:28,244
And it's good
in the rain, too.
264
00:13:28,285 --> 00:13:29,675
You know how
you have to be runnin',
265
00:13:29,721 --> 00:13:32,071
your perm be gettin' wet?
And you be, "Oh! Oh!"
266
00:13:32,115 --> 00:13:34,415
See, I don't have to do that.
I just be walkin'.
267
00:13:34,465 --> 00:13:37,155
Walkin' in the hood,
"What's up girl? What's happenin'?"
268
00:13:38,687 --> 00:13:41,167
Get home, shake it out.
Hang it up.
269
00:13:41,211 --> 00:13:42,651
[AUDIENCE LAUGHING]
270
00:13:44,432 --> 00:13:47,172
And I got over that
embarrassment long time ago.
271
00:13:47,217 --> 00:13:50,347
Back in the '70's.
Remember the Super Flydays?
272
00:13:50,394 --> 00:13:53,314
Am I the oldest motherfucker
in here? Okay.
273
00:13:53,354 --> 00:13:57,534
Okay, so I had my hair done,
it was like, poof, poof, poof.
274
00:13:57,575 --> 00:13:59,835
Had on the diamond rings,
fur coat.
275
00:13:59,882 --> 00:14:03,282
Went to step out of a limo,
and left the shit swingin' on the door.
276
00:14:05,583 --> 00:14:07,853
From then on I said,
"Fuck it. I ain't gonna worry about it."
277
00:14:09,587 --> 00:14:12,157
And the little oriental lady
that sells me my wigs,
278
00:14:12,199 --> 00:14:14,199
she love to see me coming.
279
00:14:14,244 --> 00:14:17,204
She be like,
[IMITATING ASIAN ACCENT] "Oh, Laura. How you doing?
280
00:14:17,247 --> 00:14:19,637
"Come on in,
I got a nice wig for you.
281
00:14:21,077 --> 00:14:22,637
"It's you color."
282
00:14:25,690 --> 00:14:28,080
She know every
goddamn one is my color.
283
00:14:29,651 --> 00:14:31,961
And I just turned 40
a couple of years ago.
284
00:14:32,001 --> 00:14:33,611
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
285
00:14:36,701 --> 00:14:39,531
But I went wild though, baby,
after I turn 40.
286
00:14:39,574 --> 00:14:42,584
You know, you turn 40
and you start gettin' into younger men.
287
00:14:44,971 --> 00:14:46,541
I was tossin' 'em.
288
00:14:46,581 --> 00:14:48,581
I was tossin' 'em, though.
289
00:14:48,626 --> 00:14:51,186
I was like, "Come here.
Shut up. Fuck. Get out."
290
00:14:51,238 --> 00:14:52,718
[AUDIENCE CHEERING
AND APPLAUDING]]
291
00:14:55,459 --> 00:14:56,979
See ya.
292
00:14:57,026 --> 00:14:58,846
Thank you very much,
I'm Laura Hayes.
293
00:14:59,768 --> 00:15:01,248
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]
294
00:15:13,738 --> 00:15:17,088
Yo, I'd like to give
a shout out to someone who just stepped in the house.
295
00:15:17,133 --> 00:15:19,443
He a bad motherfucker
and he on Def Jam.
296
00:15:19,483 --> 00:15:21,663
LL Cool J.
297
00:15:21,703 --> 00:15:23,363
[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
298
00:15:24,488 --> 00:15:26,138
MARTIN: What's up, man?
299
00:15:26,186 --> 00:15:28,666
How you livin', L?
300
00:15:28,710 --> 00:15:30,670
How you livin', L?
301
00:15:30,712 --> 00:15:32,982
[SHRIEKS]
302
00:15:33,019 --> 00:15:35,499
[HIGH-PITCHED VOICE]
That's my motherfucker there.
303
00:15:40,026 --> 00:15:41,236
So, yo,
304
00:15:41,288 --> 00:15:43,728
we gonna bring to the stage
305
00:15:43,768 --> 00:15:46,948
a brother that is one of
Russell Simmons' personal favorites...
306
00:15:46,989 --> 00:15:48,379
[CHUCKLES]
307
00:15:48,425 --> 00:15:51,295
...and he's a wild boy,
so brace yourself.
308
00:15:51,341 --> 00:15:53,821
He's from Brooklyn.
309
00:15:53,865 --> 00:15:56,085
[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
310
00:15:56,129 --> 00:15:59,439
Yo, give it up
for G. George.
311
00:15:59,480 --> 00:16:00,960
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]
312
00:16:17,193 --> 00:16:18,893
[MUSIC STOPS]
313
00:16:21,371 --> 00:16:23,771
What the fuck is this?
A family reunion?
314
00:16:23,808 --> 00:16:26,118
God damn,
is Brooklyn in the house?
315
00:16:26,159 --> 00:16:27,899
[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
316
00:16:29,858 --> 00:16:32,298
All right.
We gonna set this off. Fasten your seat belts.
317
00:16:32,339 --> 00:16:34,169
This shit is definitely real.
318
00:16:34,210 --> 00:16:36,000
Now, how many y'all like sex?
319
00:16:36,038 --> 00:16:37,558
[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
320
00:16:37,605 --> 00:16:39,345
Who loves to talk
about sex?
321
00:16:39,389 --> 00:16:41,389
Now, check this out.
Just the other day, right?
322
00:16:41,435 --> 00:16:44,735
I went to the top floor
of the World Trade Center. They got a bar up there.
323
00:16:44,786 --> 00:16:47,916
And I see this bitch
got more butt than a box of Newports.
324
00:16:47,963 --> 00:16:50,883
Draggin' a wagon.
Plenty of junk in her trunk.
325
00:16:50,922 --> 00:16:53,582
So I slides up on her.
I said, um...
326
00:16:53,621 --> 00:16:55,581
"Moosie poo,
Sugar bloomers.
327
00:16:58,887 --> 00:17:01,017
"I mean, uh,
328
00:17:01,063 --> 00:17:03,023
"what's the flavor, neighbor?
329
00:17:03,065 --> 00:17:05,065
"I'm ready to suck
a fort out your ass.
330
00:17:06,025 --> 00:17:07,545
"Shit.
331
00:17:07,591 --> 00:17:09,381
"As a matter of fact,
332
00:17:09,419 --> 00:17:11,989
"I'm ready to spin, bitch,
slide up in your guts,
333
00:17:12,031 --> 00:17:14,641
"split open your butt
and bust a ferocious nut all over your chest
334
00:17:14,685 --> 00:17:16,465
"and rub it in
like it's calamine lotion."
335
00:17:18,776 --> 00:17:20,386
Girlfriend said, "Nigga,
336
00:17:20,430 --> 00:17:22,780
"why don't you act like
you should raise up off me?
337
00:17:22,824 --> 00:17:24,964
"'Cause I don't need you.
338
00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:27,180
"Let the welfare feed you.
Your mother made you, let mother fuck you.
339
00:17:27,220 --> 00:17:29,090
"Now, put some wheels on eels
and skate off, before I be fired your ass."
340
00:17:29,135 --> 00:17:30,915
I said, "Baby, why you
talkin' like that?"
341
00:17:30,962 --> 00:17:33,312
She said,
"'Cause my name is Polly-Oh-the-ho.
342
00:17:33,356 --> 00:17:35,746
"That's why I got all this
cheese back here. I don't think you could handle it."
343
00:17:35,793 --> 00:17:37,753
I said, "Well, baby,
if you was mine,
344
00:17:37,795 --> 00:17:40,315
"I would suck the cheese
out your toes, caress your kneecaps,
345
00:17:40,363 --> 00:17:42,453
"eat the blueberry critters
out your butt,
346
00:17:42,496 --> 00:17:44,366
"tongue kiss your armpits,
drink your bathwater with a crazy straw.
347
00:17:44,411 --> 00:17:46,941
"And as long as I got
a face, you got somewhere to sit."
348
00:17:46,978 --> 00:17:48,278
[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
349
00:17:51,200 --> 00:17:52,460
Well, girlfriend said,
"Well, come on,
350
00:17:52,506 --> 00:17:54,156
"let's go to the bar
and talk about this."
351
00:17:54,203 --> 00:17:56,473
I said, "Whatever's clever,
Miss Trevor."
352
00:17:56,510 --> 00:17:58,640
So I'm followin' behind her
lookin' at the cheese go left to right, right?
353
00:17:58,686 --> 00:18:00,246
I said, "God damn."
354
00:18:00,296 --> 00:18:02,426
So, we sit down. We drinkin'
Long Island iced teas,
355
00:18:02,472 --> 00:18:05,352
kicking the political blase,
propaganda rhetoric and bogus, you know,
356
00:18:05,388 --> 00:18:06,818
the willy bo-bo.
357
00:18:06,868 --> 00:18:08,608
Rubbin' each other hips,
playin' footsies.
358
00:18:08,652 --> 00:18:11,482
All of a sudden,
the door kick in, pa-boom!
359
00:18:11,525 --> 00:18:13,175
When the smoke cleared,
360
00:18:13,222 --> 00:18:15,922
seen a motherfucker with
a strap as long as Dick Tracy,
361
00:18:15,964 --> 00:18:17,844
with a screw face like
Shabba Ranks.
362
00:18:17,879 --> 00:18:19,579
[AUDIENCE EXCLAIMS]
363
00:18:19,620 --> 00:18:21,670
Got his hand
in his pocket like this.
364
00:18:23,450 --> 00:18:25,410
I said, "Oh, my God.
Dude gonna rob the joint.
365
00:18:25,452 --> 00:18:27,372
"I only got 15 cents over
Chinese food in my clothes.
366
00:18:27,410 --> 00:18:29,410
"I'll be fucked up, I gotta
take that iron horse tonight.
367
00:18:29,456 --> 00:18:31,846
"Oh, my God!"
368
00:18:31,893 --> 00:18:34,163
Bad enough, I'm tryin' to get
girlfriend to pay for these Long Island iced teas.
369
00:18:34,200 --> 00:18:35,940
You know what I'm sayin'?
370
00:18:35,984 --> 00:18:37,814
Anyway, instead of pulling out
a Mac-10 with a banana clip,
371
00:18:37,855 --> 00:18:39,545
guess what this
motherfucker pulled out?
372
00:18:40,336 --> 00:18:43,856
A .40.
373
00:18:43,905 --> 00:18:46,425
He said, "This shit here is
guaranteed to make every day in your bedroom
374
00:18:46,473 --> 00:18:48,173
"some type of spectacular."
375
00:18:48,214 --> 00:18:50,174
Girlfriend gave me
the elbow.
376
00:18:52,000 --> 00:18:53,780
"Check this punk ass nigga."
377
00:18:53,828 --> 00:18:55,088
Soft and velvety cheese.
378
00:18:55,134 --> 00:18:56,354
She's like a baby shoe.
He booty.
379
00:18:56,396 --> 00:18:57,826
He can't throw rice
at a Chinese wedding.
380
00:18:57,875 --> 00:18:59,355
Ain't going to hurt nothin'
lettin' them die.
381
00:18:59,399 --> 00:19:01,099
I should be
fighting his ass.
382
00:19:01,140 --> 00:19:02,660
I said, "Chill, baby,
hear the man out."
383
00:19:02,706 --> 00:19:04,666
He said, "For example."
384
00:19:04,708 --> 00:19:07,188
Took a goggle. [GULPING]
385
00:19:07,233 --> 00:19:08,363
And walked out the window.
386
00:19:11,933 --> 00:19:13,503
Now, remember,
387
00:19:13,543 --> 00:19:16,723
we a hundred and some storeys
in the fuckin' air.
388
00:19:16,764 --> 00:19:18,514
This motherfucker walked
out the window,
389
00:19:18,548 --> 00:19:20,158
go around the
motherfucking building,
390
00:19:20,202 --> 00:19:22,202
come back in the door,
"Ta-da!" like Roger Rabbit.
391
00:19:24,293 --> 00:19:25,863
Know what girlfriend said?
392
00:19:25,903 --> 00:19:28,213
"Let me at that bottle."
393
00:19:28,254 --> 00:19:30,214
Snatched the shit,
drunk it down to the suds,
394
00:19:30,256 --> 00:19:32,476
threw it behind her back,
did a dance like she was Greek,
395
00:19:32,519 --> 00:19:34,039
turned around and said,
"Don't let my drink get hot."
396
00:19:34,085 --> 00:19:35,775
I said, "Bitch,
where is you goin'?"
397
00:19:35,826 --> 00:19:38,176
She stepped one foot
out the window,
398
00:19:38,220 --> 00:19:40,740
and fell 100 some storeys
to her death.
399
00:19:42,398 --> 00:19:44,488
Bartender wiping
the motherfucking table off.
400
00:19:44,531 --> 00:19:48,061
[CHUCKLES] He said,
"Superman, you a funny motherfucker sometimes.
401
00:19:48,099 --> 00:19:49,749
"I swear to God."
402
00:19:56,282 --> 00:19:57,412
Man, I got to go.
403
00:19:57,457 --> 00:19:58,847
Man, they got me
on short time.
404
00:19:58,893 --> 00:20:00,503
I'm gonna put some wheels
on my heels and skate.
405
00:20:00,547 --> 00:20:01,977
Man, I'm outta here like
Belvedere with no underwear.
406
00:20:02,026 --> 00:20:03,896
Peace to my man, Terrell,
and peace to Brooklyn.
407
00:20:03,941 --> 00:20:06,071
Y'all take care.
Y'all lookin' nice tonight.
408
00:20:06,117 --> 00:20:07,767
[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
409
00:20:15,518 --> 00:20:18,258
[LAUGHING]
410
00:20:18,304 --> 00:20:22,484
For those of y'all
who don't know what the fuck G. George was sayin',
411
00:20:22,525 --> 00:20:25,395
we got dictionaries
in the back.
412
00:20:25,441 --> 00:20:28,101
No, that's my man.
Give him a round of applause.
413
00:20:28,139 --> 00:20:29,579
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDS]
414
00:20:33,362 --> 00:20:34,932
We gonna kick it.
415
00:20:34,972 --> 00:20:37,282
Comin' from my
motherfucking home town...
416
00:20:37,323 --> 00:20:39,413
I know white people going,
417
00:20:39,455 --> 00:20:41,585
[IN AMERICAN ACCENT]
"Do they have to say motherfucker all the time?"
418
00:20:41,631 --> 00:20:43,681
'Cause you know,
that's just the way we talk.
419
00:20:43,720 --> 00:20:45,550
"Hey, motherfucker,
what's up?
420
00:20:45,592 --> 00:20:48,382
"Motherfucker?
Ah, go ahead, motherfucker.
421
00:20:48,421 --> 00:20:50,861
"Oh, you a wild
motherfucker."
422
00:20:50,901 --> 00:20:52,511
That's just how we do.
423
00:20:52,555 --> 00:20:54,465
White people get offended,
"Hey, motherfucker!"
424
00:20:54,514 --> 00:20:55,954
[IN AMERICAN ACCENT]
"Hey, why?"
425
00:20:57,821 --> 00:21:00,351
"Why are you so emotional?
426
00:21:00,389 --> 00:21:02,129
"God."
427
00:21:02,173 --> 00:21:04,223
But that's how we talk.
428
00:21:04,263 --> 00:21:08,443
Yo, comin' to the stage
from my home town, the nation's capital.
429
00:21:08,484 --> 00:21:10,144
He's here to do some
motherfuckin' work for ya
430
00:21:10,181 --> 00:21:11,621
and I know
you're gonna enjoy him.
431
00:21:11,661 --> 00:21:13,881
So, give it up
for Ted Carpenter.
432
00:21:13,924 --> 00:21:16,284
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING][AUDIENCE CHEERING]
433
00:21:24,500 --> 00:21:25,810
One more time,
Martin Lawrence!
434
00:21:25,849 --> 00:21:27,199
Give it up to him!
435
00:21:27,242 --> 00:21:29,382
[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
436
00:21:32,291 --> 00:21:33,341
Is that cool?
437
00:21:33,379 --> 00:21:35,119
Oh, okay.
438
00:21:35,163 --> 00:21:37,173
The first thing I want to say
is it's good to do a show
439
00:21:37,208 --> 00:21:39,208
in front of all
pretty black folks. I'm telling you the truth.
440
00:21:39,254 --> 00:21:40,824
'Cause I got a fucked-up
management company.
441
00:21:40,864 --> 00:21:42,304
No, don't clap. Don't clap!
442
00:21:42,344 --> 00:21:44,524
[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]
443
00:21:44,564 --> 00:21:46,784
Niggas be puttin' me on
some fucked-up shows. Man, I'm tellin' you now.
444
00:21:46,827 --> 00:21:50,307
Last week, I did a show
in New York State Prison.
445
00:21:50,352 --> 00:21:52,792
Niggas got triple,
double life.
446
00:21:52,833 --> 00:21:55,663
That means a motherfucker die
two times, he gotta come back and do four more years.
447
00:21:55,705 --> 00:21:58,225
[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]Right?
448
00:21:58,273 --> 00:22:00,363
Right? So I'm doin'
my shit, right?
449
00:22:00,406 --> 00:22:01,926
I'm being just...
I'm, you know, I'm bein' me, right?
450
00:22:01,972 --> 00:22:03,282
Them niggas be
in the back sayin',
451
00:22:03,322 --> 00:22:05,062
"Yo, Slim. No, no, no, no.
Fuck that.
452
00:22:05,106 --> 00:22:08,196
"Do somebody we know.
Do, uh, Richard Pryor."
453
00:22:09,937 --> 00:22:11,847
And I say, "Yo, Slim.
I ain't doin' Richard.
454
00:22:11,895 --> 00:22:13,455
"I can't even
do the motherfucker."
455
00:22:13,506 --> 00:22:16,986
"You don't do Richard Pryor,
we gonna fuck you up!"
456
00:22:17,031 --> 00:22:19,341
[IMITATING RICHARD PRYOR]
When I first came down here,
457
00:22:19,381 --> 00:22:23,821
I drove this motherfucker
445 miles on one tank of gas.
458
00:22:23,864 --> 00:22:25,394
[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
459
00:22:27,607 --> 00:22:29,737
I left that motherfucker
doin' Richard Pryor.
460
00:22:29,783 --> 00:22:31,353
Niggas was talkin' about
a good show.
461
00:22:31,393 --> 00:22:32,873
I'm like, "Thank you,
motherfucker. Thank you."
462
00:22:37,443 --> 00:22:39,103
Oh, man.
463
00:22:39,140 --> 00:22:41,270
I'm from Washington DC, man.
No, Southeast Washington.
464
00:22:42,361 --> 00:22:43,841
Southeast Washington.
465
00:22:43,884 --> 00:22:45,674
If y'all motherfuckers
don't know what that is,
466
00:22:45,712 --> 00:22:47,762
that shit is like
three Harlems and a half a Bronx.
467
00:22:47,801 --> 00:22:49,191
[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]
468
00:22:49,237 --> 00:22:51,107
Bad motherfucking
neighborhood, man.
469
00:22:51,152 --> 00:22:53,112
My neighborhood
is so fuckin' bad,
470
00:22:53,154 --> 00:22:55,244
mailmen leaves shit
on the corner, let you sort it out.
471
00:22:57,463 --> 00:22:58,943
And I love black women.
472
00:22:58,986 --> 00:23:01,206
Look at y'all.
God damn, look at y'all.
473
00:23:01,249 --> 00:23:02,819
Oh, God damn. Look at her.
474
00:23:02,859 --> 00:23:04,299
Girl, you ought to
give yourself five.
475
00:23:04,339 --> 00:23:06,429
God damn, you look good.
476
00:23:06,472 --> 00:23:08,652
Ooh. I like
all type of women, too.
477
00:23:08,691 --> 00:23:10,431
Big, fat, short or tall.
478
00:23:10,476 --> 00:23:12,696
But I love
big girls, see?
479
00:23:12,739 --> 00:23:14,699
'Cause there's a difference
to makin' love to a big girl than a small girl.
480
00:23:14,741 --> 00:23:16,571
I'm tellin' you, now.
481
00:23:16,612 --> 00:23:18,352
See small girls,
you can do tricks on their little ass.
482
00:23:18,397 --> 00:23:20,827
Can you do tricks
on that little ass?
483
00:23:20,877 --> 00:23:23,097
You know what I'm saying?
Smack 'em on the ass, make 'em hit their head on the wall.
484
00:23:24,751 --> 00:23:26,841
[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
485
00:23:29,538 --> 00:23:31,448
"Why you so raw?"
486
00:23:33,499 --> 00:23:36,109
You know, the little girls
got that don't-hurt-me spot.
487
00:23:36,153 --> 00:23:37,943
Fellas, you ever found that
"don't hurt me" spot?
488
00:23:37,981 --> 00:23:40,641
Little women will tell ya,
"Don't hurt me."
489
00:23:40,680 --> 00:23:44,070
Know damn well,
our mission will change to seek and destroy.
490
00:23:46,120 --> 00:23:48,690
You will find that
"don't hurt me spot", am I right?
491
00:23:48,731 --> 00:23:50,731
You'll be pokin' around
that motherfucker.
492
00:23:50,777 --> 00:23:53,607
Just pokin' around
minding your own business.
493
00:23:53,649 --> 00:23:55,429
Hit it, hit,
hit from the side.
494
00:23:55,477 --> 00:23:56,957
You start goin' up inside.
495
00:23:58,088 --> 00:23:59,478
[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
496
00:24:06,096 --> 00:24:07,916
But see, my girlfriend,
any time I hit that spot,
497
00:24:07,968 --> 00:24:10,008
she will bark
like a beagle, right?
498
00:24:10,057 --> 00:24:12,487
I swear to God,
when I first hit it, when I first hit it,
499
00:24:12,538 --> 00:24:15,368
the first time I hit it,
I tapped it, she said... [BARKING]
500
00:24:18,631 --> 00:24:22,811
And the shit scared me,
so I backed up and I kind of looked at it.
501
00:24:22,852 --> 00:24:24,202
Looked at the dog
and the dog is like,
502
00:24:24,245 --> 00:24:27,155
[IN SCOOBY-DOO VOICE]
"I don't know."
503
00:24:27,204 --> 00:24:29,514
He was runnin' 'round,
peein' on shit.
504
00:24:29,555 --> 00:24:31,245
Peeing on the motherfucker.
505
00:24:31,295 --> 00:24:34,115
Just peein'!
506
00:24:34,168 --> 00:24:37,128
He was thinkin'
another fucking dog was in the house and shit,
507
00:24:37,171 --> 00:24:38,911
just lookin' at
the motherfucker.
508
00:24:38,955 --> 00:24:40,435
Every time I would hit
that little spot,
509
00:24:40,479 --> 00:24:41,829
I'd get a little
rogue one there,
510
00:24:41,871 --> 00:24:44,001
she'd go... [BARKING]
511
00:24:44,047 --> 00:24:46,657
Get it real good, she go...
[BARKS LOUDER]
512
00:24:46,702 --> 00:24:47,832
Motherfuckers
knockin' next door.
513
00:24:47,877 --> 00:24:49,137
[KNOCKS]
514
00:24:49,183 --> 00:24:50,533
You ain't supposed
to have no dogs.
515
00:24:50,576 --> 00:24:52,396
[LAUGHTER]
516
00:24:55,363 --> 00:24:56,973
But I'm full black.
I don't give a fuck.
517
00:24:57,017 --> 00:24:59,107
I got a black car in
a black driveway,
518
00:24:59,149 --> 00:25:01,849
in a black house, in a black
motherfucking neighborhood.
519
00:25:01,891 --> 00:25:03,071
That's what I'm talkin' about.
520
00:25:06,592 --> 00:25:07,902
I love black.
521
00:25:07,941 --> 00:25:10,331
I even vote for Jesse again
if the nigga run,
522
00:25:10,378 --> 00:25:13,688
even though we don't know
what the fuck he talkin' about half the God damn time.
523
00:25:13,729 --> 00:25:16,859
You know Jesse'll make up
a word in the middle. Y'all know that.
524
00:25:16,906 --> 00:25:18,596
Y'all niggas will
vote for him, too.
525
00:25:18,647 --> 00:25:20,557
But see, y'all just think
Jesse just started that shit.
526
00:25:20,606 --> 00:25:22,216
Jesse was makin' up words
527
00:25:22,259 --> 00:25:23,089
when him and
Martin Luther King was together.
528
00:25:23,130 --> 00:25:24,780
Long fucking time ago.
529
00:25:24,827 --> 00:25:26,607
I'm serious, he was a young
nigga then. A bush nigga.
530
00:25:26,655 --> 00:25:28,565
A nigga with a bush,
joggin' in the room.
531
00:25:28,614 --> 00:25:30,404
"Martin?
532
00:25:30,441 --> 00:25:32,361
"Martin?
533
00:25:32,400 --> 00:25:36,060
"When we march on Selma,
Alabama, what we want to do is we want to..."
534
00:25:36,883 --> 00:25:38,583
"Jogetize."
535
00:25:41,017 --> 00:25:44,107
[IMITATING MARTIN LUTHER KING]
"Now come on, Jesse. You know that's not a word.
536
00:25:50,636 --> 00:25:52,936
"I don't understand why
all my young brothers
537
00:25:52,986 --> 00:25:55,376
"decide to come in here
and just make things up.
538
00:25:58,731 --> 00:26:02,691
"But, Jesse, I just
wanna tell you that I'm still there with you.
539
00:26:02,735 --> 00:26:05,215
"I'm there with you
from the problems in Vincent Hurst
540
00:26:05,259 --> 00:26:06,959
"to the hilltops of Georgia.
541
00:26:07,000 --> 00:26:08,310
"I'm still there with you.
542
00:26:08,349 --> 00:26:10,129
[AUDIENCE CHEERING]
543
00:26:13,310 --> 00:26:15,970
"And if, Jesse,
anybody asks you about me,
544
00:26:16,009 --> 00:26:18,659
"do not tell them that I won
the Nobel Peace Prize.
545
00:26:18,707 --> 00:26:21,797
"That's not what
I want them to know!
546
00:26:21,841 --> 00:26:24,801
"But tell them that
Martin Luther King Junior,
547
00:26:24,844 --> 00:26:27,724
"never, ever, ever
548
00:26:27,760 --> 00:26:30,590
"wore Jheri curls.
That's what I want my people to know."
549
00:26:30,632 --> 00:26:32,942
[AUDIENCE CHEERING
AND HOOTING]
550
00:26:32,982 --> 00:26:34,382
Give it to a nigga.
551
00:26:34,418 --> 00:26:35,938
Give it to a nigga.
I'm gonna earn mine.
552
00:26:35,985 --> 00:26:38,025
Peace, my name
is Ted Carpenter.
553
00:26:38,074 --> 00:26:39,994
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING][AUDIENCE CHEERING]
554
00:26:47,344 --> 00:26:49,784
Yo, give him a round
of applause, man.
555
00:26:49,825 --> 00:26:51,435
Teddy Carpenter.
556
00:26:55,091 --> 00:26:58,141
Yo, you guys have truly
been a great audience
557
00:26:58,181 --> 00:27:01,181
for me and my man,
Russell Simmons.
558
00:27:01,228 --> 00:27:03,398
[HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING][AUDIENCE CHEERING]
559
00:27:07,713 --> 00:27:10,503
Thank y'all for comin' out.
Good night and God bless you.
560
00:27:18,593 --> 00:27:20,643
[HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING]
561
00:27:20,693 --> 00:27:25,243
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