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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,166 --> 00:00:06,176 Happy Valentine's Day, sir. 2 00:00:06,216 --> 00:00:08,316 Did you decide what to get for Ms. Fine? 3 00:00:08,350 --> 00:00:10,500 Yes, nothing. 4 00:00:10,830 --> 00:00:13,130 Oh, you can't get her the same thing you got me. 5 00:00:15,330 --> 00:00:18,100 I thought it could be misconstrued if I got her something too personal. 6 00:00:18,133 --> 00:00:20,103 So I found this very funny card. 7 00:00:20,133 --> 00:00:22,333 On the front it says, "What rhymes with Cupid?" 8 00:00:22,366 --> 00:00:25,096 Then you open it up and inside there's a mirror 9 00:00:25,133 --> 00:00:28,403 and it says "Happy Valentine's Day, stupid." 10 00:00:34,450 --> 00:00:37,320 - Oh, Ms. Fine, it's you. - No, it's not. 11 00:00:37,350 --> 00:00:39,480 It's stupid. 12 00:00:41,660 --> 00:00:43,160 Now, that's funny. 13 00:00:46,000 --> 00:00:47,370 How could you? 14 00:00:47,400 --> 00:00:51,180 It's Valentine's Day, the most romantic holiday of the entire year. 15 00:00:51,216 --> 00:00:53,426 I thought if I got you a sentimental card that said 16 00:00:53,466 --> 00:00:57,496 you know, "I love you," you might go and misinterpret it. 17 00:00:57,830 --> 00:00:59,000 Moi? 18 00:01:00,660 --> 00:01:02,270 Well, it has been known to happen. 19 00:01:02,300 --> 00:01:06,330 We wake up in bed together, you misinterpret it. 20 00:01:06,366 --> 00:01:10,266 We end up naked in the Jacuzzi, you misinterpret it. 21 00:01:12,830 --> 00:01:14,130 And then, just because I ask you to marry me, you go-- 22 00:01:14,166 --> 00:01:16,396 Do shut up, you babbling British moron. 23 00:01:18,483 --> 00:01:21,203 Well, I hope you don't misinterpret it 24 00:01:21,233 --> 00:01:23,223 if one morning you happen to wake up 25 00:01:23,250 --> 00:01:26,480 and find a high heel in your butt. 26 00:01:27,160 --> 00:01:30,270 Oh, I wish I'd never said, "I love you" in the first place. 27 00:01:30,300 --> 00:01:34,180 Oh. Oh, my-my whole nervous system just shut down. 28 00:01:37,160 --> 00:01:40,830 I can't see. I cannot see. 29 00:01:46,450 --> 00:01:49,280 All right. Go on. Go ahead, Niles. Fire away. 30 00:01:49,316 --> 00:01:52,346 No, sir. It's not my place to say anything. 31 00:01:52,383 --> 00:01:54,483 But a picture paints a thousand words. 32 00:02:03,450 --> 00:02:06,350 ♪♪ She was working in a bridal shop in Flushing, Queens ♪♪ 33 00:02:06,383 --> 00:02:08,833 ♪♪ 'Til her boyfriend kicked her out ♪♪ 34 00:02:08,116 --> 00:02:09,396 ♪♪ In one of those crushing scenes ♪♪ 35 00:02:09,433 --> 00:02:11,323 ♪♪ What was she to do? Where was she to go? ♪♪ 36 00:02:11,350 --> 00:02:14,420 ♪♪ She was out on her fanny ♪♪ 37 00:02:14,450 --> 00:02:17,180 ♪♪ So over the bridge from Flushing to the Sheffield's door ♪♪ 38 00:02:17,216 --> 00:02:19,466 ♪♪ She was there to sell makeup, but the father saw more ♪♪ 39 00:02:20,000 --> 00:02:22,830 ♪♪ She had style! She had flair! She was there! ♪♪ 40 00:02:22,116 --> 00:02:25,426 ♪♪ That's how she became the nanny! ♪♪ 41 00:02:25,466 --> 00:02:28,366 ♪♪ Who would have guessed that the girl we've described ♪♪ 42 00:02:28,400 --> 00:02:31,660 ♪♪ Was just exactly what the doctor prescribed? ♪♪ 43 00:02:31,100 --> 00:02:32,300 ♪♪ Now the father finds her beguiling ♪♪ 44 00:02:32,333 --> 00:02:34,003 ♪♪ Watch out, C.C.! ♪♪ 45 00:02:34,330 --> 00:02:35,230 ♪♪ And the kids are actually smiling ♪♪ 46 00:02:35,266 --> 00:02:36,476 ♪♪ Such joie de vivre! ♪♪ 47 00:02:37,160 --> 00:02:38,180 ♪♪ She's the lady in red ♪♪ 48 00:02:38,216 --> 00:02:42,496 ♪♪ When everybody else is wearing tan ♪♪ 49 00:02:42,830 --> 00:02:44,150 ♪♪ The flashy girl from Flushing ♪♪ 50 00:02:44,183 --> 00:02:46,153 ♪♪ The nanny named Fran! ♪♪ 51 00:02:49,133 --> 00:02:50,373 [DOORBELL RINGS] 52 00:02:50,400 --> 00:02:53,170 I'll get it. 53 00:02:55,250 --> 00:02:58,830 - Oh, hi, Ma. - Fran, I'm so glad you're home. 54 00:02:58,116 --> 00:03:00,146 Yetta has lost her mind. 55 00:03:01,400 --> 00:03:03,220 And? 56 00:03:04,483 --> 00:03:07,383 She met a man and wants to get married. 57 00:03:07,416 --> 00:03:09,346 Why? Are you pregnant? 58 00:03:11,300 --> 00:03:16,480 I don't think so. But I'm really late. 59 00:03:22,116 --> 00:03:26,416 Well, that makes her, Martha Raye and Eva Braun all married before me. 60 00:03:27,433 --> 00:03:29,223 The guy is up to no good. 61 00:03:29,250 --> 00:03:33,330 - He looks at her and sees dollar signs. - What, Ma? 62 00:03:33,660 --> 00:03:38,000 He's making a deal with the Colombians to move her stash of digitalis? 63 00:03:39,433 --> 00:03:41,373 She's got no money. 64 00:03:41,400 --> 00:03:45,180 She gets $200 a month from Social Security. 65 00:03:45,216 --> 00:03:49,126 What do you think he's after? Her flattuchas? 66 00:03:51,250 --> 00:03:57,120 She's just jealous because so many men are attracted to me. 67 00:03:57,150 --> 00:04:01,220 Even my doctor says I got charisma. 68 00:04:03,200 --> 00:04:05,380 That's arrhythmia, Yetta. 69 00:04:09,250 --> 00:04:11,300 Come on, we're gonna go down to the bank 70 00:04:11,333 --> 00:04:14,483 and make sure that the joint account she and I have 71 00:04:15,160 --> 00:04:18,330 says, "Both signatures required." 72 00:04:18,366 --> 00:04:20,426 Wait a second. Wait a second. 73 00:04:20,466 --> 00:04:23,296 Maybe he's really attracted to her. 74 00:04:23,333 --> 00:04:25,283 Yeah. 75 00:04:31,133 --> 00:04:33,423 All right. Come on, Val will drive us. 76 00:04:35,133 --> 00:04:37,433 What were you thinking of? The man is a baby. 77 00:04:37,466 --> 00:04:40,146 He's 60 years old. 78 00:04:40,183 --> 00:04:41,273 60? 79 00:04:41,300 --> 00:04:44,380 Yetta, he's not even back in diapers yet. 80 00:04:48,100 --> 00:04:50,180 You should be ashamed of yourself. 81 00:04:50,216 --> 00:04:54,216 Two of him together would be closer to your age. 82 00:04:55,400 --> 00:04:57,100 Not interested. 83 00:04:57,133 --> 00:05:00,153 With two men, there's always 84 00:05:00,183 --> 00:05:03,303 jealousy, performance anxiety. 85 00:05:12,830 --> 00:05:13,480 What? 86 00:05:14,160 --> 00:05:17,480 So now you know a little something about nana. 87 00:05:19,216 --> 00:05:21,446 Come on. 88 00:05:21,483 --> 00:05:24,303 [MUSIC PLAYING] 89 00:05:24,333 --> 00:05:28,003 Oh, look, a space right in front of the bank. 90 00:05:28,330 --> 00:05:31,000 Oh, wait a minute, Val. This is handicapped parking. 91 00:05:31,330 --> 00:05:35,120 It's okay. You're in therapy. You're an emotional cripple. 92 00:05:35,150 --> 00:05:38,320 No, no. Don't park illegally. It isn't nice. 93 00:05:38,350 --> 00:05:41,330 Go over to that meter over there. Here. 94 00:05:41,366 --> 00:05:43,366 Put this bag on it. 95 00:05:43,400 --> 00:05:46,330 No, I'm just gonna wait in the car. 96 00:05:46,366 --> 00:05:48,346 You don't need to make a deposit? 97 00:05:48,383 --> 00:05:50,833 Oh, I don't belong to this bank. 98 00:05:50,116 --> 00:05:54,656 - Oh, where do you put your money? - In a pig. 99 00:05:56,830 --> 00:05:59,130 [MUSIC PLAYING] 100 00:06:05,366 --> 00:06:08,496 You coat your chicken in peanut butter... 101 00:06:08,830 --> 00:06:09,450 - Oh. - ...and then you roll it 102 00:06:09,483 --> 00:06:14,333 -in stale, crumbled ginger snaps. -Ohh! 103 00:06:14,660 --> 00:06:18,420 And one, two, three, you've got Hawaiian chicken. 104 00:06:20,383 --> 00:06:25,253 - And daddy likes this? - No. He can't stand the sight of it. 105 00:06:25,283 --> 00:06:30,183 And one, two, three, I'm eating lobster at the Seafood Broiler. 106 00:06:32,133 --> 00:06:34,323 Good one, Ma. 107 00:06:37,316 --> 00:06:39,396 [CLEARS THROAT] This is a hold-up. 108 00:06:39,433 --> 00:06:42,203 What? 109 00:06:42,233 --> 00:06:46,203 What's the hold up? Some yenta's picking out designer checks. 110 00:06:47,216 --> 00:06:49,266 - [GUNSHOT] - [PEOPLE SCREAM] 111 00:06:51,333 --> 00:06:54,423 All right, everyone on the floor. 112 00:06:58,383 --> 00:07:03,453 No quick moves and no one gets in small unmarked bills. 113 00:07:05,233 --> 00:07:09,383 My God, Ma, I can't believe we're in the middle of a bank robbery. 114 00:07:09,416 --> 00:07:11,376 Poor, Mr. Sheffield. 115 00:07:11,416 --> 00:07:16,276 If I die, he is going to feel so guilty about what he said. 116 00:07:16,316 --> 00:07:19,116 You know, this could work. 117 00:07:19,450 --> 00:07:21,300 Will you please shut up. 118 00:07:21,333 --> 00:07:22,323 Shh. 119 00:07:22,350 --> 00:07:25,420 He's not wearing a ring. 120 00:07:28,250 --> 00:07:30,320 Ma, he's a thief. 121 00:07:30,350 --> 00:07:35,380 Who's gonna be worth millions in a matter of minutes. 122 00:07:36,383 --> 00:07:39,153 [SIRENS APPROACHING] 123 00:07:39,183 --> 00:07:42,383 [MUSIC PLAYING] 124 00:07:45,183 --> 00:07:48,423 Oh, Maxwell, look, they're makingLost in Space into a movie. 125 00:07:48,450 --> 00:07:51,320 Oh, I loved that as a child. 126 00:07:51,350 --> 00:07:53,230 Ooh, I'm dating myself. 127 00:07:53,266 --> 00:07:55,276 Dating yourself? That's pathetic. 128 00:07:55,316 --> 00:07:58,166 Even you can do better than you. 129 00:08:01,400 --> 00:08:06,320 This from a man who parties with PAM. As in a can of. 130 00:08:08,100 --> 00:08:10,380 You know, the next time you give your old clothes away, 131 00:08:10,416 --> 00:08:12,426 why don't you just stay in them? 132 00:08:12,466 --> 00:08:16,126 All right. That's it. I don't want you two in the same room ever again. 133 00:08:16,166 --> 00:08:18,496 BOTH: Why? 134 00:08:18,830 --> 00:08:21,220 Because I can't stand it anymore. That's why. 135 00:08:21,250 --> 00:08:22,330 BOTH: What? 136 00:08:22,366 --> 00:08:25,196 This! This! 137 00:08:27,433 --> 00:08:30,433 Oh, my God, something terrible happened. 138 00:08:30,466 --> 00:08:32,426 I just heard it on the news. 139 00:08:32,466 --> 00:08:34,466 What? What happened, Yetta? 140 00:08:35,000 --> 00:08:38,170 Wait a minute. I lost it. 141 00:08:40,350 --> 00:08:43,430 Don't worry, Yetta. You told me in case you forgot. 142 00:08:43,466 --> 00:08:46,326 Who are you? 143 00:08:47,316 --> 00:08:50,376 Grace, just tell me what happened. 144 00:08:50,416 --> 00:08:54,226 Fran and Sylvia are being held hostage in a bank robbery. 145 00:08:54,266 --> 00:08:56,826 [GROANS] 146 00:08:56,116 --> 00:08:59,476 This is how you break bad news to an old woman? 147 00:09:02,416 --> 00:09:05,176 Oh, sir, this is horrible. What shall we do? 148 00:09:05,216 --> 00:09:07,216 Well, I have to go down there and help. 149 00:09:07,250 --> 00:09:09,220 Oh, of course. The SWAT team and the FBI 150 00:09:09,250 --> 00:09:13,220 desperately need the producer ofJelly's Last Jam on their side. 151 00:09:14,216 --> 00:09:16,346 - Niles, start the car. - Yes, sir. 152 00:09:19,300 --> 00:09:22,180 [MUSIC PLAYING] 153 00:09:25,366 --> 00:09:29,216 Oh, I can't believe I'm gonna die here. 154 00:09:29,250 --> 00:09:31,420 My whole life is passing before my eyes. 155 00:09:31,450 --> 00:09:36,160 Beautiful baby, most popular girl in high school. 156 00:09:36,500 --> 00:09:37,350 Maid. 157 00:09:39,250 --> 00:09:44,400 I'm thinking how pissed I am I didn't eat that second blintz this morning. 158 00:09:47,300 --> 00:09:49,280 You're not thinking about Daddy? 159 00:09:49,316 --> 00:09:53,496 Yeah, who do you think ate it? 160 00:09:53,830 --> 00:09:55,380 I'm sorry, but if you two can't please be quiet, 161 00:09:55,416 --> 00:09:56,446 I'm gonna have to gag you. 162 00:09:56,483 --> 00:10:00,503 Oh, please, would you. 163 00:10:05,333 --> 00:10:07,303 You know, sir, 164 00:10:07,333 --> 00:10:11,663 I don't mean to tell you how to do a robbery or anything 165 00:10:11,100 --> 00:10:14,200 but you really should have bought some spray paint 166 00:10:14,233 --> 00:10:16,123 for those security cameras. 167 00:10:16,150 --> 00:10:18,200 That's why I wore the ski mask. 168 00:10:21,133 --> 00:10:23,353 It's not pulled down, is it? 169 00:10:29,400 --> 00:10:31,150 I brought the wrong hat, didn't I? 170 00:10:33,333 --> 00:10:36,323 I'm sorry, um, I don't even know your name. 171 00:10:36,350 --> 00:10:39,660 I'm Leslie Tilbert. 172 00:10:39,100 --> 00:10:41,430 - Nobody heard that, did they? - No, no. 173 00:10:41,466 --> 00:10:44,266 He said Leslie Tilbert. 174 00:10:50,166 --> 00:10:52,426 Your mother drove you to this, didn't she? 175 00:10:52,466 --> 00:10:56,476 Yes. I need the money to buy her a condo in Florida so I can get her out of my life. 176 00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:02,830 You know, I don't know what this is worth 177 00:11:02,116 --> 00:11:04,416 but I want you to take it with my blessings. 178 00:11:06,316 --> 00:11:09,496 [MUSIC PLAYING] 179 00:11:11,166 --> 00:11:13,376 Excuse me. Excuse us. 180 00:11:13,416 --> 00:11:15,466 Would you let us through, please. Excuse me. 181 00:11:16,000 --> 00:11:18,120 Sorry. Oh, there you are. What do you know so far? 182 00:11:18,150 --> 00:11:21,130 Well, um, he's single. 183 00:11:21,166 --> 00:11:23,126 Divorced. 184 00:11:23,166 --> 00:11:25,226 Who the hell cares. 185 00:11:27,100 --> 00:11:29,830 - She must be in shock. - Oh, no, sir. 186 00:11:29,116 --> 00:11:31,126 What you see is what you get. 187 00:11:31,166 --> 00:11:34,126 I'm talking about Ms. Fine. How is Ms. Fine and her mother? 188 00:11:34,166 --> 00:11:36,226 Oh, well, so far it's quiet. 189 00:11:36,266 --> 00:11:40,226 - Oh, my God, he's killed her. - Oh, no, sir. 190 00:11:48,466 --> 00:11:51,246 Boy, I'm never gonna get out of this. 191 00:11:52,483 --> 00:11:56,103 I should have gone to med school like my brother. 192 00:11:56,133 --> 00:11:59,323 But I hate the sight of blood. 193 00:11:59,350 --> 00:12:02,220 Oh, you hate the sight of blood. 194 00:12:06,830 --> 00:12:08,370 Excuse me. 195 00:12:08,400 --> 00:12:11,250 I'm a hippoglycemic. 196 00:12:21,100 --> 00:12:26,000 If I don't eat something soon, it may be fatal. 197 00:12:27,500 --> 00:12:29,660 You're not gonna die. 198 00:12:29,100 --> 00:12:31,150 She meant you. 199 00:12:35,333 --> 00:12:40,163 - What should I do? - I'd order take-out. 200 00:12:40,500 --> 00:12:42,130 Right across the street there's a Roy Rogers 201 00:12:42,166 --> 00:12:45,656 a Kenny Rogers and a Tony Roma's. 202 00:12:45,100 --> 00:12:49,150 We call it the chazer strip. 203 00:12:49,183 --> 00:12:54,203 No, I'd like something light like fettuccine Alfredo. 204 00:12:54,233 --> 00:12:57,283 You know, deli's easier with a group. 205 00:12:57,316 --> 00:13:00,276 Oh, you know, he's right. But do we want dairy or meat? 206 00:13:00,316 --> 00:13:02,096 Because I could go either way. 207 00:13:02,133 --> 00:13:04,303 [EXCITED CHATTERING] 208 00:13:06,383 --> 00:13:08,373 - Shut up! - [GUNSHOT] 209 00:13:08,400 --> 00:13:10,130 [PEOPLE SCREAM] 210 00:13:12,466 --> 00:13:14,416 We'll do Deli. 211 00:13:17,383 --> 00:13:20,283 What's going on in there? Is everyone all right? 212 00:13:20,316 --> 00:13:23,466 FRAN: We're okay. 213 00:13:24,000 --> 00:13:26,450 That's one of the hostages on the megaphone. 214 00:13:26,483 --> 00:13:31,153 That's no megaphone. That's my nanny. 215 00:13:33,316 --> 00:13:36,216 [MUSIC PLAYING] 216 00:13:40,116 --> 00:13:42,396 Now, remember, only three or four ice cubes. 217 00:13:42,433 --> 00:13:46,003 A martini is not a smoothie. 218 00:13:48,160 --> 00:13:51,100 Well, when do we dip the gym sock in it for good luck? 219 00:13:51,133 --> 00:13:55,173 - What? - That's how Niles makes yours. 220 00:13:58,116 --> 00:14:00,316 - Hi, what's going on? - Hi, Yetta. 221 00:14:01,333 --> 00:14:04,223 I don't wanna upset your sister. 222 00:14:04,250 --> 00:14:06,170 So don't say anything 223 00:14:06,200 --> 00:14:10,320 about Fran and Sylvia being held hostage in the bank. 224 00:14:10,350 --> 00:14:13,130 Oh, my God, that's awful. Are they okay? 225 00:14:14,133 --> 00:14:16,503 Let's start over. 226 00:14:17,116 --> 00:14:21,656 I don't wanna upset your sister. So... 227 00:14:21,100 --> 00:14:23,500 Yetta, Yetta, Yetta. 228 00:14:24,166 --> 00:14:25,226 Look, is Fran all right? 229 00:14:25,266 --> 00:14:27,216 The police are there. Don't worry. 230 00:14:27,250 --> 00:14:29,500 Well, how can we not worry? 231 00:14:29,830 --> 00:14:31,500 Try one of these smoothies. 232 00:14:33,450 --> 00:14:35,300 Oy, gevalt. 233 00:14:35,333 --> 00:14:41,223 Am I crazy or does this prune Danish look exactly like Moshe Dayan? 234 00:14:43,133 --> 00:14:45,173 Both. 235 00:14:45,200 --> 00:14:49,370 It's like the cinnamon bun that looked like Mother Teresa. 236 00:14:49,400 --> 00:14:52,500 We're gonna be rich. 237 00:14:52,830 --> 00:14:54,470 Mugs, T-shirts. 238 00:14:55,000 --> 00:14:57,400 We'll go on David Susskind. 239 00:14:57,433 --> 00:15:02,253 Yetta, your daughter and granddaughter are being held hostage in a bank. 240 00:15:02,283 --> 00:15:04,323 What? 241 00:15:05,300 --> 00:15:08,330 [MUSIC PLAYING] 242 00:15:09,350 --> 00:15:15,180 No. Here's his list of demands. 243 00:15:17,116 --> 00:15:21,466 He wants a limousine to the airport 244 00:15:25,100 --> 00:15:29,000 a private jet to Mexico. 245 00:15:29,330 --> 00:15:30,270 Uh-huh. 246 00:15:30,300 --> 00:15:34,430 Oh, and that Valentino dress in Bergdorf's window. 247 00:15:34,466 --> 00:15:36,276 Thank you. 248 00:15:41,266 --> 00:15:43,656 What? 249 00:15:44,283 --> 00:15:47,173 They don't gotta know you're straight. 250 00:15:48,830 --> 00:15:49,450 [TELEPHONE RINGS] 251 00:15:49,483 --> 00:15:51,233 Hello. 252 00:15:52,660 --> 00:15:53,350 It's Maxwell again. 253 00:15:54,166 --> 00:15:56,226 Tell him I'm not here. 254 00:15:59,100 --> 00:16:03,170 - Come on, just say hello. - No. 255 00:16:08,416 --> 00:16:12,326 She doesn't wanna talk to you. 256 00:16:12,366 --> 00:16:16,476 Well, I think she's feeling a little hurt right now, Max. 257 00:16:18,433 --> 00:16:22,163 Tell him we're just sitting down to eat. 258 00:16:22,500 --> 00:16:26,330 Okay. All right. I'll talk to you later, buddy. Bye-bye. 259 00:16:28,316 --> 00:16:32,266 Fran, I'm so glad you're here. I'm totally screwing up this robbery. 260 00:16:32,300 --> 00:16:34,480 I'm no good at anything. 261 00:16:35,160 --> 00:16:37,270 What are you talking about? 262 00:16:37,300 --> 00:16:41,500 You're doing a tremendous job. 263 00:16:41,830 --> 00:16:45,120 Everybody is terrified of you. 264 00:16:47,433 --> 00:16:49,253 Drop that pastrami. 265 00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:53,280 You didn't wanna order. 266 00:16:53,316 --> 00:16:58,196 You were too nervous to eat. Now, you deal with it. 267 00:17:04,350 --> 00:17:06,660 Go around back and see 268 00:17:06,100 --> 00:17:08,250 if anybody from the SWAT team can get a clear shot at him. 269 00:17:08,283 --> 00:17:10,163 NILES: Excuse me. Excuse me. 270 00:17:10,500 --> 00:17:12,270 - Here you are, sir. - Oh, Niles, thank you so much. 271 00:17:12,300 --> 00:17:15,470 Niles, may I confess something to you? 272 00:17:16,000 --> 00:17:17,330 Well, I'm not a priest, sir, 273 00:17:17,366 --> 00:17:20,276 but I'm this close to living the life of one. 274 00:17:21,300 --> 00:17:24,150 I said something awful to Ms. Fine. 275 00:17:24,183 --> 00:17:26,253 More awful than saying you were sorry that you ever said 276 00:17:26,283 --> 00:17:28,383 you loved her in the first place? 277 00:17:28,416 --> 00:17:31,316 I ought to rip that bloody intercom out of the wall. 278 00:17:31,350 --> 00:17:33,280 You promised you wouldn't listen in again. 279 00:17:33,316 --> 00:17:37,466 Oh, have a heart, sir. I quit for two weeks but I ballooned up to a 38 waist. 280 00:17:39,216 --> 00:17:42,146 I mean, what if, God forbid, 281 00:17:42,183 --> 00:17:45,183 anything should happen to Ms. Fine in there? 282 00:17:45,216 --> 00:17:47,176 I just couldn't live with myself 283 00:17:47,216 --> 00:17:50,346 knowing that those were the last words she ever heard from me. 284 00:17:50,383 --> 00:17:53,503 Well, why don't you send her a card? 285 00:17:55,183 --> 00:17:57,303 I'm all wound up, sir. 286 00:17:59,350 --> 00:18:01,380 -This is a tart tartan. -Eh. 287 00:18:01,416 --> 00:18:03,396 Chocolate decadence. 288 00:18:03,433 --> 00:18:06,303 And a lovely New York cheese cake. 289 00:18:09,330 --> 00:18:11,830 What happened to the blueberry crumble? 290 00:18:17,100 --> 00:18:18,480 That went very fast. 291 00:18:19,160 --> 00:18:20,350 Oh. Mm. 292 00:18:24,100 --> 00:18:26,160 Gee, Fran, I'm sad this has to end. 293 00:18:26,500 --> 00:18:28,430 Oh, you and me both. 294 00:18:28,466 --> 00:18:33,196 You know, believe it or not, this isn't the worst date I've ever had. 295 00:18:34,450 --> 00:18:38,160 MAN: You in there, we got you a limo. 296 00:18:38,500 --> 00:18:39,400 -Oh. -My ride's here. I gotta go. 297 00:18:39,433 --> 00:18:41,503 Oh. 298 00:18:43,830 --> 00:18:45,350 You wanna take a little something for the road? 299 00:18:45,383 --> 00:18:46,483 No, thanks, Sylvia. I'm full. 300 00:18:47,160 --> 00:18:50,300 I'm talking about the money! 301 00:18:50,333 --> 00:18:55,423 Oy! Is this aschmendrick? 302 00:18:55,450 --> 00:18:57,280 You know, it's Friday. 303 00:18:57,316 --> 00:18:58,996 You're gonna hit all kinds of traffic. 304 00:18:59,330 --> 00:19:00,280 Listen to me. You'll be smart. 305 00:19:00,316 --> 00:19:03,446 Take the expressway to the Flatbush circle exit. 306 00:19:03,483 --> 00:19:06,353 Go around the circle and hang a right. 307 00:19:06,383 --> 00:19:09,353 I thought you make a right half-way around? 308 00:19:09,383 --> 00:19:11,403 No. That's the way you go because you always stop at 309 00:19:11,433 --> 00:19:13,323 that Mongolian barbecue place. 310 00:19:13,350 --> 00:19:16,380 - And that's where you make the right. - You're wrong, Ma. 311 00:19:16,416 --> 00:19:19,146 You'll never find it. We'll go with you. 312 00:19:19,183 --> 00:19:21,353 Ma! 313 00:19:21,383 --> 00:19:24,303 No, no, no. It's a great idea because I could use some cover. 314 00:19:24,333 --> 00:19:26,173 -Let's go. Come on. -Oh! 315 00:19:26,200 --> 00:19:28,180 -I'm going. -Oh, oh. Oh! 316 00:19:28,216 --> 00:19:31,326 And still not the worst date I've ever had. 317 00:19:35,216 --> 00:19:38,416 Ms. Fine! Ms. Fine, are you all right? 318 00:19:38,450 --> 00:19:42,830 Oh, Mr. Sheffield-- I'm not talking to you. 319 00:19:42,116 --> 00:19:46,316 Ms. Fine, please, please, you have to listen to me. 320 00:19:46,350 --> 00:19:48,200 There is nothing more to say. 321 00:19:48,233 --> 00:19:52,353 I just think that it's really sad that my abductor and I are closer 322 00:19:52,383 --> 00:19:55,223 than you and I will ever be. 323 00:19:58,183 --> 00:19:59,433 Ms. Fine, 324 00:19:59,466 --> 00:20:04,166 I'm not sorry I told you I love you. 325 00:20:04,200 --> 00:20:06,430 - She said she doesn't want to talk to you. - Enough already. 326 00:20:06,466 --> 00:20:08,446 Make your getaway and shut up. 327 00:20:08,483 --> 00:20:10,483 Mr. Sheffield. 328 00:20:11,266 --> 00:20:13,116 Oh, Ms. Fine. 329 00:20:13,150 --> 00:20:15,300 Mr. Sheffield, I thought I'd never see you again. 330 00:20:15,333 --> 00:20:17,433 - Oh, thank God you're all right. - Oh! Oh! 331 00:20:17,466 --> 00:20:21,416 Oh, Ms. Fine, I am so sorry I gave you that stupid card. 332 00:20:21,450 --> 00:20:24,180 Oh, and I'm sorry that I cut up your good silk tie 333 00:20:24,216 --> 00:20:26,166 to make Gracie's Barbie an evening gown. 334 00:20:26,200 --> 00:20:29,660 - This could be the trauma talking. - VAL: Fran! 335 00:20:29,100 --> 00:20:32,170 - Fran. - Oh, Val! Val! 336 00:20:32,200 --> 00:20:34,160 [BOTH SOBBING] 337 00:20:34,500 --> 00:20:36,330 The bank robber took your mother! 338 00:20:36,366 --> 00:20:40,176 Oh, my God, that poor man! 339 00:20:44,000 --> 00:20:46,250 Oh, look at this, they're interviewing Ma on the news. 340 00:20:46,283 --> 00:20:48,233 - Ooh! - The pursuit ended abruptly 341 00:20:48,266 --> 00:20:50,116 when the bank robber made a wrong turn 342 00:20:50,150 --> 00:20:53,660 and was apprehended in front of the Mongolian barbecue. 343 00:20:53,100 --> 00:20:55,370 Sylvia Fine, one of the hostages, was with him. 344 00:20:55,400 --> 00:20:58,370 Sylvia, can you describe it for us. 345 00:20:58,400 --> 00:21:02,330 Honestly, it's a little fatty. 346 00:21:02,366 --> 00:21:06,826 I think they're under new management. 347 00:21:06,116 --> 00:21:11,116 Oh, I'll tell you, if I hadn't given him that shortcut to the airport 348 00:21:11,150 --> 00:21:13,420 Ma would in Mexico by now. 349 00:21:13,450 --> 00:21:17,660 - I'm gonna have to let go of that. - Mm-hmm. 350 00:21:18,416 --> 00:21:21,446 Oh, hi, Mr. Sheffield. Wait a minute. 351 00:21:21,483 --> 00:21:24,183 I have a Valentine's Day card for you. 352 00:21:24,216 --> 00:21:28,656 - Oh, Ms. Fine, thank you. - Okay. 353 00:21:28,100 --> 00:21:32,380 - Look, two puppy dogs kissing. - Uh-huh. 354 00:21:33,416 --> 00:21:37,366 "For Valentine's Day, I give you my heart... 355 00:21:38,250 --> 00:21:39,370 worm." 356 00:21:41,466 --> 00:21:43,396 Heart worm? 357 00:21:44,483 --> 00:21:47,323 It's a parasite. 358 00:21:50,160 --> 00:21:52,350 Dogs get it all the time. 359 00:21:54,183 --> 00:21:55,403 It's a joke. 360 00:21:58,100 --> 00:22:00,000 What? 361 00:22:00,330 --> 00:22:03,330 Well, it is a little impersonal, don't you think? 362 00:22:03,660 --> 00:22:05,270 Oh, what are you getting so upset about? 363 00:22:05,300 --> 00:22:08,250 We have known each other for four years. I just feel... 364 00:22:08,283 --> 00:22:11,203 Don't touch that intercom. 365 00:22:12,483 --> 00:22:14,373 You have my word, sir. 366 00:22:19,166 --> 00:22:21,416 Oh, Ms. Grace. 367 00:22:21,450 --> 00:22:25,330 - Yes? - Would you push that button for me? 368 00:22:26,166 --> 00:22:28,216 Thank you. 369 00:22:29,100 --> 00:22:31,450 [FRAN AND MAXWELL ARGUING] 370 00:22:37,416 --> 00:22:40,326 [THEME MUSIC PLAYING] 26907

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